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- Ahh.
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[upbeat music]
3
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Chapter eight, Tom's family
had gotten used to the idea
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00:00:08,551 --> 00:00:10,532
that he was writing
a novel about them.
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00:00:10,632 --> 00:00:12,490
And now it felt like the
Hayworths were entering
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00:00:12,514 --> 00:00:15,137
a new season together...
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Stronger, connected,
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more devoted than ever.
- Oh, sorry, I got to take this.
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Business call.
- But this is a family brunch.
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00:00:21,322 --> 00:00:24,225
- And this is a business call.
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Frank!
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- All right, what do
you guys want to do
13
00:00:26,567 --> 00:00:27,668
the rest of the weekend?
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00:00:27,768 --> 00:00:29,224
I promised Marina I
wouldn't work on the book.
15
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- Isn't hanging out with us
kind of like research for you?
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00:00:31,811 --> 00:00:32,912
- What? No.
17
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No, come on, this
is family time.
18
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This isn't research.
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Does anyone else want a drink?
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Add a beat where
everyone's suspicious
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00:00:38,817 --> 00:00:41,119
that Tom's secretly recording
everything for his book.
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? ?
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00:00:43,101 --> 00:00:45,404
- Family time, so precious.
24
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? ?
25
00:00:49,467 --> 00:00:51,547
- Can we do something tomorrow
that's not too pricey?
26
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Like going to the park.
- Fine by me.
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I mean, speaking as an
under-employed American.
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Plus, I really
don't want the kids
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to get used to
Connor's lifestyle.
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- Yeah, last week Camila asked
me where we were summering.
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00:01:01,798 --> 00:01:03,380
- Question for the table,
32
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who wants to see a 49ers game?
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[kids cheer]
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- Oh, uh, actually, we
were just saying that...
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- Shut up, Tom.
In a luxury suite.
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[kids cheer]
37
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[kids chanting] Connor,
Connor, Connor, Connor!
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- ? Hey, hey, hey, hey ?
39
00:01:20,054 --> 00:01:21,432
- So I'm closing a deal
with this guy, Frank...
40
00:01:21,456 --> 00:01:22,797
Huge Niners fan.
41
00:01:22,897 --> 00:01:24,759
He's got this luxury
suite at Levi's Stadium,
42
00:01:24,859 --> 00:01:26,156
and he wants to
bring me to a game.
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00:01:26,180 --> 00:01:27,717
- What kind of deal?
- Frank's got his own hedge fund
44
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but he's got this pool of money
45
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he's looking to sidecar with
my firm for some more private
46
00:01:31,224 --> 00:01:32,522
small-cap investment typ...
- You know what?
47
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Stop. It's too boring.
- Right?
48
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- Gretchen.
49
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Look, the problem is,
Frank only has five tickets
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to the suite, which
means, including the kids,
51
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I can't bring everyone.
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Obviously, Marina's coming.
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- That we will.
54
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- Why obviously?
- Because Marina's a fan.
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She's the only one here
who knows the 49ers
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average time of
possession last season.
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- 31 minutes.
- I knew that.
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- Yeah, I was gonna say 31.
- Possession like spirits?
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- Guys, look, it's a
schmooze situation.
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00:02:00,571 --> 00:02:01,988
Emily used to have my
back at these things
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but now that we're
split, you know,
62
00:02:03,253 --> 00:02:05,150
I need someone who knows
what she's talking about.
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00:02:05,174 --> 00:02:06,836
- What happened to
going to the park?
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00:02:06,936 --> 00:02:08,838
- The park's gonna
be there next week.
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Luxury suite, Tom.
- [chuckles] Okay.
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I guess if Marina's
going, then I'm going.
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[tense music]
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- Because?
- Because I like football.
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[laughter]
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- What?
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[laughter]
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- Okay, yeah, look, maybe
not as much as Marina,
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but I like watching
the old... pigskin fly.
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[laughter]
- That's funny.
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You gotta put stuff
like that in the book.
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- I'm serious.
- Tom, you're a lot of things.
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Okay? But you're
not a sports guy.
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00:02:39,645 --> 00:02:41,904
When we were kids, no one wanted
to pick you for their teams.
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00:02:41,928 --> 00:02:44,229
- Because they said I
was a good scorekeeper.
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Yeah, now hearing that
back, it kind of seems like
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maybe they didn't
need a scorekeeper.
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- No, that's an
important position.
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- Okay, are you guys
forgetting that I was a jock?
84
00:02:50,856 --> 00:02:52,758
Freshman year, remember?
85
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I used to get up at
5:30 a.m. every morning
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to shave my legs.
87
00:02:57,942 --> 00:03:00,164
- Diving team.
88
00:03:00,264 --> 00:03:01,726
- That tracks.
89
00:03:01,826 --> 00:03:02,922
- But then he had an "injury"
90
00:03:02,946 --> 00:03:04,928
that ended his
"athletic career."
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00:03:05,028 --> 00:03:08,131
- I hit the water at an
extremely dangerous angle.
92
00:03:08,231 --> 00:03:09,052
- Mm.
- Sometimes I can still feel
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00:03:09,152 --> 00:03:10,654
the water in my ear.
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00:03:10,754 --> 00:03:12,735
- Okay, fine, Tom, you can come.
95
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- Thank you.
- What about me?
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00:03:14,356 --> 00:03:15,938
- Us.
- What about us?
97
00:03:16,038 --> 00:03:17,295
- Just kind of figured you
guys wouldn't want to come
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given the fact that
you think anything
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with the word "luxury" in it
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00:03:20,042 --> 00:03:21,903
is automatically evil.
101
00:03:22,003 --> 00:03:25,306
- Yeah, well, I also
like to be included.
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Plus the NFL said that
football is gay now.
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So we are everywhere.
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- Well, Connor, what
about these kids?
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All: Please, please, please,
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please, please, please.
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- Okay, too much.
- Okay, fine. How about this?
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I'll buy some reg
ticks in the stands.
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Alejandro, Esteban,
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you guys are gonna have
to sit this one out, okay?
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You're clearly Packers fans.
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And the rest of you,
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can take turns in
the luxury suite.
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Everybody happy?
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[cheering] Yeah! Ooh!
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[kids chanting] Connor,
Connor, Connor...
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- Are you ready
for some football?
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? ?
119
00:04:01,959 --> 00:04:03,941
- Garoppolo!
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00:04:04,041 --> 00:04:05,342
All: Garoppolo.
121
00:04:05,442 --> 00:04:07,825
- Go 49ers!
122
00:04:07,925 --> 00:04:09,346
- Tom, you're trying
too hard, man.
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00:04:09,446 --> 00:04:11,667
Also, come on, what is this?
124
00:04:11,767 --> 00:04:13,910
- Cool kids wear it
with the tags on.
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00:04:14,010 --> 00:04:15,471
- At least he's
trying to belong.
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00:04:15,571 --> 00:04:17,513
- What are you talking
about? I belong.
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How else would I know that
the special teams unit
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00:04:20,015 --> 00:04:21,676
is responsible for
all kicking plays?
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00:04:21,776 --> 00:04:24,016
- It's so cute, this morning
he was on the Wikipedia page
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00:04:24,059 --> 00:04:25,760
for "American Football."
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00:04:25,860 --> 00:04:27,722
- Really? He
sounded so natural.
132
00:04:27,822 --> 00:04:29,723
- All right, the luxury
suite's up this way.
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00:04:29,823 --> 00:04:32,286
Kelvin, Shamiah, you sure you
guys are good in the stands?
134
00:04:32,386 --> 00:04:34,604
- Can we get on the Jumbotron
if we're in the luxury suites?
135
00:04:34,628 --> 00:04:36,690
- I don't think so.
- Then we'll be in the stands.
136
00:04:36,790 --> 00:04:39,692
[upbeat music]
137
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? ?
138
00:04:43,076 --> 00:04:44,777
- Welcome to Levi's Stadium,
139
00:04:44,877 --> 00:04:46,339
home of your San
Francisco 49ers.
140
00:04:46,439 --> 00:04:49,101
- Whoo. Look at this place.
141
00:04:49,201 --> 00:04:51,203
Wow.
142
00:04:52,084 --> 00:04:54,146
- Connor.
- Frank.
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00:04:54,246 --> 00:04:55,566
Thanks again for
the tickets, man.
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00:04:55,647 --> 00:04:57,948
- Oh, my pleasure. Say,
this is my wife, Georgia.
145
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She never misses a game.
146
00:04:59,770 --> 00:05:01,290
How about your wife?
Did you bring her?
147
00:05:01,332 --> 00:05:03,394
- Oh, no, I'm actually, uh,
148
00:05:03,494 --> 00:05:06,277
freshly divorced, but I
brought the next best thing.
149
00:05:06,377 --> 00:05:07,377
My brother, Tom...
150
00:05:07,458 --> 00:05:09,079
Uh, Tom, move out of the way...
151
00:05:09,179 --> 00:05:12,522
My brother Tom's wife, Marina.
- Oh, hi.
152
00:05:12,622 --> 00:05:14,924
I am so used to watching
these games at home.
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00:05:15,024 --> 00:05:16,886
I just... I cannot believe
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00:05:16,986 --> 00:05:20,409
that I get to watch Fred Warner
crush somebody in person.
155
00:05:20,509 --> 00:05:24,012
- So, you're a
football widow, too?
156
00:05:24,112 --> 00:05:25,654
- No, what?
157
00:05:25,754 --> 00:05:28,956
No. I love the
gridiron. [chuckles]
158
00:05:31,038 --> 00:05:33,661
- Let's have shrimp.
- Some... okay.
159
00:05:33,761 --> 00:05:34,662
- ? Hit it ?
160
00:05:34,762 --> 00:05:35,863
? ?
161
00:05:35,963 --> 00:05:40,066
- Check out those moves.
- [screams]
162
00:05:40,166 --> 00:05:42,829
- Okay, sure, they're fun to
watch and their moves are fire.
163
00:05:42,929 --> 00:05:44,591
I think I used that correctly.
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00:05:44,691 --> 00:05:46,468
But they're only here to
support the men on the field.
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00:05:46,492 --> 00:05:47,593
- That's not true.
166
00:05:47,693 --> 00:05:49,093
They're athletes
in their own right.
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00:05:49,134 --> 00:05:51,237
And they do community outreach.
168
00:05:51,337 --> 00:05:54,640
Alexis and Marissa visited a
children's hospital last week.
169
00:05:54,740 --> 00:05:57,442
I follow their Instagram.
- Really?
170
00:05:57,542 --> 00:05:59,644
- I also follow
Kaley Cuoco's dog.
171
00:05:59,744 --> 00:06:01,045
I follow a lot of people, okay?
172
00:06:01,145 --> 00:06:03,368
Anyway, can we just, for
once, pretend to like
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00:06:03,468 --> 00:06:05,009
normal American things?
174
00:06:05,109 --> 00:06:06,730
- Yes, yes, of course.
175
00:06:06,830 --> 00:06:10,454
Okay, I will go get us some
normal American vegan nachos.
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00:06:10,554 --> 00:06:12,095
- That's the spirit.
- Okay.
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00:06:12,195 --> 00:06:14,277
- 49ers first down.
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00:06:16,759 --> 00:06:21,424
- So, um, cheerleading
isn't Mom's vibe?
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00:06:21,524 --> 00:06:23,586
- She has a very
particular vibe.
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00:06:23,686 --> 00:06:27,909
- It's just there was this
cheerleading thing at school,
181
00:06:28,009 --> 00:06:30,872
and I was thinking...
182
00:06:30,972 --> 00:06:32,594
- Of trying out?
183
00:06:32,694 --> 00:06:34,194
- No.
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00:06:34,294 --> 00:06:36,797
Never mind, forget
it. Don't tell Mom.
185
00:06:36,897 --> 00:06:41,602
? ?
186
00:06:41,702 --> 00:06:45,805
- So I said, "Uh, yeah,
maybe if I were a Jets fan."
187
00:06:45,905 --> 00:06:48,047
[laughter]
188
00:06:48,147 --> 00:06:50,089
- Yo, Marina, you're killing me.
189
00:06:50,189 --> 00:06:52,131
- Thanks 24KGoldn.
- Your wife is a riot.
190
00:06:52,231 --> 00:06:55,654
- Oh, no, she's actually, um...
191
00:06:55,754 --> 00:06:58,817
Yeah, she really is.
- Oh!
192
00:06:58,917 --> 00:07:00,254
- The doctor said the
water's still in there.
193
00:07:00,278 --> 00:07:01,860
It's... yeah.
194
00:07:01,960 --> 00:07:03,216
You know, sometimes I can
still hear it sloshing around.
195
00:07:03,240 --> 00:07:06,303
[laughter]
- Stop it.
196
00:07:06,403 --> 00:07:07,985
- Oh, let them have their fun.
197
00:07:08,085 --> 00:07:11,348
If it's not for you,
it's not for you.
198
00:07:11,448 --> 00:07:14,230
- I guess it's always
kind of been this way.
199
00:07:14,330 --> 00:07:16,793
Connor would bond with
our dad over sports
200
00:07:16,893 --> 00:07:20,036
and make fun of me for not
being able to catch a ball.
201
00:07:20,136 --> 00:07:22,638
But it's different now.
I mean, we're older.
202
00:07:22,738 --> 00:07:24,800
I could be a sports
guy if I want to.
203
00:07:24,900 --> 00:07:26,442
- Well, here comes your chance.
204
00:07:26,542 --> 00:07:28,604
- I've got Georgia on my mind.
205
00:07:28,704 --> 00:07:31,527
- [laughs] Oh, Jerry,
that gets me every time.
206
00:07:31,627 --> 00:07:33,648
Meet my new friend, Tom.
207
00:07:33,748 --> 00:07:35,369
- Tom, how you doing?
Nice to meet you.
208
00:07:35,469 --> 00:07:37,331
- He's a big football fan.
- Hm.
209
00:07:37,431 --> 00:07:40,054
- Well, you know,
I guess I dabble.
210
00:07:40,154 --> 00:07:41,414
How about yourself?
211
00:07:41,514 --> 00:07:43,092
- I guess I know a
little about football.
212
00:07:43,116 --> 00:07:44,177
- Oh, okay.
213
00:07:44,277 --> 00:07:46,279
Do you know about
the special teams?
214
00:07:48,161 --> 00:07:51,463
- Oh, God. Is that Jerry Rice?
- Uh-huh.
215
00:07:51,563 --> 00:07:53,265
- Yeah, and he's talking to Tom.
216
00:07:53,365 --> 00:07:54,787
Oh, God.
217
00:07:54,887 --> 00:07:57,830
- At the end of the day,
it's all about yards.
218
00:07:57,930 --> 00:08:00,553
You know, which team
has the most yards...
219
00:08:00,653 --> 00:08:03,675
And downs.
- Really?
220
00:08:03,775 --> 00:08:06,077
- Oh, yeah.
- Tom doesn't know who he is?
221
00:08:06,177 --> 00:08:07,759
- No, not a clue.
- Yeah.
222
00:08:07,859 --> 00:08:10,280
- If I had to pick my favorite
down, I'd say 3rd down.
223
00:08:10,380 --> 00:08:13,523
Yeah, no, yeah, 3rd down.
What's your favorite down?
224
00:08:13,623 --> 00:08:14,925
- Touchdown.
225
00:08:15,025 --> 00:08:17,247
- Huh, I didn't know
that was an option.
226
00:08:17,347 --> 00:08:19,249
- I'll go over there.
- Okay, honey.
227
00:08:19,349 --> 00:08:21,250
- Ooh, stopped at the line.
228
00:08:21,350 --> 00:08:23,212
[screaming]
229
00:08:23,312 --> 00:08:24,814
- Over here.
230
00:08:24,914 --> 00:08:26,255
[cheering]
231
00:08:26,355 --> 00:08:27,572
- They don't have
vegan nachos here.
232
00:08:27,596 --> 00:08:28,738
Can you believe that?
233
00:08:28,838 --> 00:08:30,498
- Oh, crazy.
- Yeah.
234
00:08:30,598 --> 00:08:32,216
- Uh, so, I have something
important to tell you.
235
00:08:32,240 --> 00:08:33,520
- [gasps] Did we
win? Is it over?
236
00:08:33,561 --> 00:08:35,343
- No, it's still very
early in the game.
237
00:08:35,443 --> 00:08:36,985
- Oh.
- But while you were gone,
238
00:08:37,085 --> 00:08:39,186
Kelvin told me that he's
interested in trying out
239
00:08:39,286 --> 00:08:40,726
for the cheerleading
squad at school.
240
00:08:40,808 --> 00:08:41,989
- What?
- Yeah.
241
00:08:42,089 --> 00:08:44,111
What do you think about that?
242
00:08:44,211 --> 00:08:46,834
- Wow, I guess I'm...
243
00:08:46,934 --> 00:08:48,716
proud of him.
244
00:08:48,816 --> 00:08:50,476
Way to push against
the gender norms.
245
00:08:50,576 --> 00:08:51,477
- Yeah.
- Good for Kelvin.
246
00:08:51,577 --> 00:08:53,479
Good for you, Kelvin.
247
00:08:53,579 --> 00:08:56,242
- Yeah, yeah, totally.
I'm on the same page.
248
00:08:56,342 --> 00:08:57,880
So, what if I told you that
it was actually Shamiah
249
00:08:57,904 --> 00:09:00,125
who said that?
- Huh? What? Who?
250
00:09:00,225 --> 00:09:02,527
So not Kelvin?
- No.
251
00:09:02,627 --> 00:09:05,610
- Well, with Shamiah
252
00:09:05,710 --> 00:09:07,853
it is a totally
different situation
253
00:09:07,953 --> 00:09:10,014
because she's...
- Oh, I see.
254
00:09:10,114 --> 00:09:13,577
Okay, so if your son is a
cheerleader, that's progressive,
255
00:09:13,677 --> 00:09:15,877
but if your daughter's a
cheerleader, that's regressive?
256
00:09:17,401 --> 00:09:20,103
Admit it, I got you. Ya burnt.
257
00:09:20,203 --> 00:09:21,500
- I'm not burnt.
I remain unburnt.
258
00:09:21,524 --> 00:09:23,226
- Ya burnt.
- Okay, you know
259
00:09:23,326 --> 00:09:25,006
that cheerleaders are
viewed a certain way.
260
00:09:25,088 --> 00:09:26,990
- By you, yes, you
made that very clear
261
00:09:27,090 --> 00:09:28,586
and that's why Shamiah
didn't want to tell you.
262
00:09:28,610 --> 00:09:30,152
She thought you'd be all judgy.
263
00:09:30,252 --> 00:09:32,114
- That's ridiculous,
I'm not judgy.
264
00:09:32,214 --> 00:09:33,471
You know, calling someone judgy,
265
00:09:33,495 --> 00:09:35,717
that is a form of judgment.
- Mm.
266
00:09:35,817 --> 00:09:36,914
- You know that there
are different standards
267
00:09:36,938 --> 00:09:38,199
for girls and boys.
268
00:09:38,299 --> 00:09:40,321
That's like Feminism 101.
- I thought feminism was
269
00:09:40,421 --> 00:09:41,838
being allowed to do
whatever you want.
270
00:09:41,862 --> 00:09:45,486
- Ooh, she got you there, bro.
- Okay, thank you.
271
00:09:45,586 --> 00:09:47,266
- You are not part of
this discussion, sir.
272
00:09:47,347 --> 00:09:48,768
- Okay.
- Okay.
273
00:09:48,868 --> 00:09:51,411
- Whoo!
- Whoo.
274
00:09:51,511 --> 00:09:54,174
- See, a lot of people think a
touchdown's worth seven points.
275
00:09:54,274 --> 00:09:55,415
It's really just six.
276
00:09:55,515 --> 00:09:57,456
The seven is like a...
277
00:09:57,556 --> 00:09:59,258
An extra point, if you will.
278
00:09:59,358 --> 00:10:01,941
Or there's what we call
a two-point conversion.
279
00:10:02,041 --> 00:10:04,944
I know. It can be
a little confusing.
280
00:10:05,044 --> 00:10:07,665
- Hey, big fan. Excuse
us for a second.
281
00:10:07,765 --> 00:10:08,942
Also, check out the
chocolate strawberries,
282
00:10:08,966 --> 00:10:11,589
they're delicious, yeah.
283
00:10:11,689 --> 00:10:12,987
What are you doing?
- I'm schmoozing, you know?
284
00:10:13,011 --> 00:10:14,472
Talking sports.
285
00:10:14,572 --> 00:10:17,114
- You just tried to explain
football to Jerry Rice.
286
00:10:17,214 --> 00:10:18,475
- Who's Jerry Rice?
287
00:10:18,575 --> 00:10:21,478
- Tom, he's the best
receiver of all time.
288
00:10:21,578 --> 00:10:24,561
- [laughs]
- Oh.
289
00:10:24,661 --> 00:10:26,638
- This is why I didn't want
to bring you up here, Tom.
290
00:10:26,662 --> 00:10:28,844
These are important
people for my business.
291
00:10:28,944 --> 00:10:30,886
Okay, you don't fit in here.
292
00:10:30,986 --> 00:10:33,970
- Oh, well, I'm sorry if I'm
screwing everything up for you.
293
00:10:34,070 --> 00:10:36,251
If I'm not luxury suite
material, like my wife.
294
00:10:36,351 --> 00:10:39,054
- Whoa. If anyone
asks, she's my wife.
295
00:10:39,154 --> 00:10:42,217
- What? Both:
Faithful to the Bay!
296
00:10:42,317 --> 00:10:44,818
- That's right,
honey. Love you.
297
00:10:44,918 --> 00:10:46,580
Hey, why don't you
go switch with Sarah?
298
00:10:46,680 --> 00:10:47,941
- Are you kidding?
299
00:10:48,041 --> 00:10:50,424
? ?
300
00:10:50,524 --> 00:10:52,986
Yeah, you know what? I'd
rather be in the stands.
301
00:10:53,086 --> 00:10:55,948
You know, with the
real sports fans.
302
00:10:56,048 --> 00:10:58,151
- Ooh, on second thought,
can you send Denise?
303
00:10:58,251 --> 00:11:00,253
[groans]
304
00:11:01,414 --> 00:11:03,955
- I don't know, Sarah,
sounds like you're proposing
305
00:11:04,055 --> 00:11:06,718
a false choice between
female empowerment
306
00:11:06,818 --> 00:11:08,720
and sex positivity.
307
00:11:08,820 --> 00:11:11,323
- He's got a point.
- Mm-hmm.
308
00:11:11,423 --> 00:11:13,724
- All right, who wants
the luxury suite?
309
00:11:13,824 --> 00:11:15,366
- Oh, you can go.
- [sighs]
310
00:11:15,466 --> 00:11:16,807
Just in time.
311
00:11:16,907 --> 00:11:18,689
I've had enough of
Gloria Steinem over here.
312
00:11:18,789 --> 00:11:21,572
- Hey, Phil gets it.
- [burps]
313
00:11:21,672 --> 00:11:24,053
- And he gave me the finger.
314
00:11:24,153 --> 00:11:25,615
- How's it going down here?
315
00:11:25,715 --> 00:11:27,937
- Oh, you know, just
philosophical discussions
316
00:11:28,037 --> 00:11:30,340
about progressive
parenting. Football stuff.
317
00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:32,821
- Right.
- Go Niners!
318
00:11:32,921 --> 00:11:34,923
- Could you not?
It's my diving ear.
319
00:11:37,366 --> 00:11:39,188
Maybe Connor's right.
320
00:11:39,288 --> 00:11:41,149
I'm not a fan.
321
00:11:41,249 --> 00:11:43,671
Definitely not a jock.
322
00:11:43,771 --> 00:11:45,873
I just embarrass everyone
by pretending otherwise.
323
00:11:45,973 --> 00:11:48,956
- Hey, you don't embarrass me.
324
00:11:49,056 --> 00:11:50,478
I know you're a
straight-up nerd.
325
00:11:50,578 --> 00:11:52,199
- [chuckles]
326
00:11:52,299 --> 00:11:53,680
- Ladies and gentlemen,
327
00:11:53,780 --> 00:11:56,443
get ready for our
halftime kick contest.
328
00:11:56,543 --> 00:11:59,526
One lucky fan will come down
to try and kick a field goal.
329
00:11:59,626 --> 00:12:01,162
- Probably should've
just stayed at home.
330
00:12:01,186 --> 00:12:04,209
- And that fan is
seated in section C214.
331
00:12:04,309 --> 00:12:07,633
Row 16, seat 7.
332
00:12:09,955 --> 00:12:11,976
- Tom.
333
00:12:12,076 --> 00:12:13,298
Tom!
334
00:12:13,398 --> 00:12:15,260
- Sorry it's like
high tide in there.
335
00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:17,342
What's up?
336
00:12:17,442 --> 00:12:19,344
- All I'm saying
is, why not make
337
00:12:19,444 --> 00:12:21,385
all the stands luxury suites?
338
00:12:21,485 --> 00:12:23,467
You know, so that everybody
has access to them.
339
00:12:23,567 --> 00:12:25,429
- Mm, so Denise didn't
want to come or...
340
00:12:25,529 --> 00:12:27,190
- Hey, Connor, isn't
that your brother?
341
00:12:27,290 --> 00:12:31,193
? ?
342
00:12:31,293 --> 00:12:33,295
- Ay, dios mio.
- What's happening?
343
00:12:35,297 --> 00:12:37,299
- This oughta be good.
344
00:12:41,222 --> 00:12:44,045
- And sign here, and you're
all set for your big kick.
345
00:12:44,145 --> 00:12:46,327
- Oh, okay, great.
Can you feel my heart?
346
00:12:46,427 --> 00:12:48,329
It's weird. My heart
feels weird, right?
347
00:12:48,429 --> 00:12:50,126
- That's the adrenaline.
This is actually good.
348
00:12:50,150 --> 00:12:51,652
- How is this good?
349
00:12:51,752 --> 00:12:53,690
I have to go kick that ball
in front of 70,000 people.
350
00:12:53,714 --> 00:12:55,816
- Plus 15 million
watching on TV.
351
00:12:55,916 --> 00:12:58,419
- What are you... no.
That's not helping.
352
00:12:58,519 --> 00:13:00,820
- Listen, you are
going to succeed, okay,
353
00:13:00,920 --> 00:13:03,160
because if you do, we'll get
tickets for the luxury suite
354
00:13:03,242 --> 00:13:04,242
for another game.
355
00:13:04,283 --> 00:13:06,185
- Oh, well, fantastic.
356
00:13:06,285 --> 00:13:08,827
- Yeah, Dad, I can't go back to
sitting in the regular seats.
357
00:13:08,927 --> 00:13:11,269
The luxury suite's
nicer than our house.
358
00:13:11,369 --> 00:13:13,952
- Listen, why don't you go
run around in the end zone.
359
00:13:14,052 --> 00:13:15,434
- I'm such an idiot.
360
00:13:15,534 --> 00:13:17,311
I tried to pass myself
off as a jock for one day
361
00:13:17,335 --> 00:13:19,116
and now I'm gonna
fail in front of...
362
00:13:19,216 --> 00:13:20,958
Literally the entire world.
363
00:13:21,058 --> 00:13:23,481
Just like I failed
in front of Jerry...
364
00:13:23,581 --> 00:13:24,842
- Rice.
- Rice, yeah.
365
00:13:24,942 --> 00:13:26,582
I knew it had something
to do with starch.
366
00:13:26,664 --> 00:13:28,544
- Listen, babe, you don't
have to do this, okay.
367
00:13:28,625 --> 00:13:30,246
- Look, if I bail now,
368
00:13:30,346 --> 00:13:32,466
Connor's gonna make fun of
me for the rest of my life,
369
00:13:32,508 --> 00:13:33,730
but...
370
00:13:33,830 --> 00:13:36,012
I mean if I go out there,
371
00:13:36,112 --> 00:13:37,372
I... it's gonna be worse.
372
00:13:37,472 --> 00:13:38,850
I don't want this to
be the first thing
373
00:13:38,874 --> 00:13:40,251
that Alejandro and Esteban
see when they Google me.
374
00:13:40,275 --> 00:13:41,657
- Es-te-ban.
- I want it to be
375
00:13:41,757 --> 00:13:43,134
that book review from the
Sarasota Herald Tribune
376
00:13:43,158 --> 00:13:45,420
that said my writing
was... promising.
377
00:13:45,520 --> 00:13:47,280
- Listen to me, everything's
going to be fine
378
00:13:47,361 --> 00:13:48,863
as long as you keep
your body square.
379
00:13:48,963 --> 00:13:50,144
You plant your foot.
380
00:13:50,244 --> 00:13:51,546
Aim for the sweet spot.
381
00:13:51,646 --> 00:13:53,027
Connect to the
top of your laces,
382
00:13:53,127 --> 00:13:55,750
and follow through.
- Got it.
383
00:13:55,850 --> 00:13:57,270
Wait, what was the second thing?
384
00:13:57,370 --> 00:14:00,153
- I love you, no
matter what happens.
385
00:14:00,253 --> 00:14:02,515
- No matter what happens?
386
00:14:02,615 --> 00:14:03,877
What could happen?
387
00:14:03,977 --> 00:14:05,278
- ? 'Cause I like to chill out ?
388
00:14:05,378 --> 00:14:06,594
? Maxin' with the
latest fashion ?
389
00:14:06,618 --> 00:14:08,200
? And the ladies gasping ?
390
00:14:08,300 --> 00:14:10,522
- I can't believe Uncle
Tom's gonna kick the ball.
391
00:14:10,622 --> 00:14:12,845
What if they ask him
to join the team?
392
00:14:12,945 --> 00:14:14,526
- Yeah, I don't
see that happening.
393
00:14:14,626 --> 00:14:16,768
? ?
394
00:14:16,868 --> 00:14:20,812
- ? Can you feel the music? ?
395
00:14:20,912 --> 00:14:21,813
? Can you feel ?
396
00:14:21,913 --> 00:14:23,614
- Okay, 49er fans,
397
00:14:23,714 --> 00:14:25,176
please welcome to the field
398
00:14:25,276 --> 00:14:30,340
our halftime field goal
kicker, Tom Hayworth.
399
00:14:30,440 --> 00:14:32,622
- 50 bucks he misses
this field goal.
400
00:14:32,722 --> 00:14:34,624
- 50 bucks says he
misses the ball.
401
00:14:34,724 --> 00:14:36,025
[laughter]
402
00:14:36,125 --> 00:14:37,707
How are you guys brothers?
403
00:14:37,807 --> 00:14:39,308
He doesn't even look like
404
00:14:39,408 --> 00:14:42,111
he could throw the ball
through the uprights.
405
00:14:42,211 --> 00:14:44,073
- Well, you know, he's
got his own skill set.
406
00:14:44,173 --> 00:14:46,314
- What? Getting wedgied?
407
00:14:46,414 --> 00:14:49,437
[laughter]
408
00:14:49,537 --> 00:14:51,079
- Doesn't even
make sense, Frank.
409
00:14:51,179 --> 00:14:53,161
- Looks like a shrimp
snuck off the buffet.
410
00:14:53,261 --> 00:14:55,803
? ?
411
00:14:55,903 --> 00:14:57,604
- Go, go, go, go, Tom.
412
00:14:57,704 --> 00:15:00,287
Go. Go, go, Tom, go.
413
00:15:00,387 --> 00:15:02,569
Go, Tom!
414
00:15:02,669 --> 00:15:04,891
Oh, my God. Ow, ow, ow, ow.
415
00:15:04,991 --> 00:15:06,412
Ow, ow, ow, ow.
416
00:15:06,512 --> 00:15:08,494
- Mom, what are you doing?
417
00:15:08,594 --> 00:15:11,497
- I'm cheerleading,
obviously. Just come here.
418
00:15:11,597 --> 00:15:13,419
Look,
419
00:15:13,519 --> 00:15:17,382
I know that I have strong
opinions about some things,
420
00:15:17,482 --> 00:15:19,660
but they're just opinions,
and they're just my opinions.
421
00:15:19,684 --> 00:15:21,684
They don't have to be yours,
so if you want to join
422
00:15:21,726 --> 00:15:24,588
the cheer squad, I will
be your number one fan.
423
00:15:24,688 --> 00:15:28,632
I will be out there screaming
the loudest for you.
424
00:15:28,732 --> 00:15:30,794
- I'll make sure she
doesn't scream that loud.
425
00:15:30,894 --> 00:15:33,836
- Come here, baby.
I'm proud of you.
426
00:15:33,936 --> 00:15:35,518
I love you.
- I love you, too.
427
00:15:35,618 --> 00:15:37,881
- [chuckling]
428
00:15:37,981 --> 00:15:39,802
- And you know if
you're doing a herkie,
429
00:15:39,902 --> 00:15:42,844
you want to keep one leg bent.
- Hmm.
430
00:15:42,944 --> 00:15:45,847
So you're an expert
already. Okay.
431
00:15:45,947 --> 00:15:47,489
? ?
432
00:15:47,589 --> 00:15:49,851
- Yeah, this feels
right. This is the move.
433
00:15:49,951 --> 00:15:52,053
I'll just get in the
car and start driving.
434
00:15:52,153 --> 00:15:54,215
The road will be my home.
435
00:15:54,315 --> 00:15:57,738
? ?
436
00:15:57,838 --> 00:16:00,561
Yes, follow through,
I know. Thank you.
437
00:16:02,642 --> 00:16:05,865
- Did Daddy go home?
- Of course not, mi amor.
438
00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:08,508
He's probably just
throwing up somewhere.
439
00:16:08,608 --> 00:16:10,610
- Tom!
440
00:16:12,691 --> 00:16:14,713
- What'd you come down
here to mock me again?
441
00:16:14,813 --> 00:16:16,311
- No, if I wanted to mock
you, I would've brought
442
00:16:16,335 --> 00:16:17,916
Frank and Jerry, they're really
443
00:16:18,016 --> 00:16:19,594
having a field day up
there in the suite.
444
00:16:19,618 --> 00:16:22,360
No, I came down here
to, you know, help you.
445
00:16:22,460 --> 00:16:24,282
- What about your
big business deal?
446
00:16:24,382 --> 00:16:26,022
- Frank's a jerk. I
just want to make sure
447
00:16:26,104 --> 00:16:28,106
you get the ball
through those uprights.
448
00:16:28,906 --> 00:16:30,368
The pole things.
449
00:16:30,468 --> 00:16:32,649
- Oh, come on, man. Come on.
450
00:16:32,749 --> 00:16:34,291
You know that's
not gonna happen.
451
00:16:34,391 --> 00:16:35,568
You've been making fun of me
about this stuff my entire life.
452
00:16:35,592 --> 00:16:36,872
- Tom.
- You and Dad used to bond
453
00:16:36,913 --> 00:16:39,216
over sports...
454
00:16:39,316 --> 00:16:40,636
I was on the outside
for a reason.
455
00:16:40,676 --> 00:16:42,013
- Tom, if I made
fun of you as a kid,
456
00:16:42,037 --> 00:16:44,220
it was just to make
myself feel better.
457
00:16:44,320 --> 00:16:45,861
All right?
458
00:16:45,961 --> 00:16:47,259
Not like I was
gonna bond with Dad
459
00:16:47,283 --> 00:16:49,105
over science stuff
460
00:16:49,205 --> 00:16:51,746
or, like, bioengineering.
461
00:16:51,846 --> 00:16:52,983
- Oh, my God, he was
a chemical engineer.
462
00:16:53,007 --> 00:16:55,150
- Sports were all
we had in common.
463
00:16:55,250 --> 00:16:57,272
Okay, and yes, you
sucked at throwing.
464
00:16:57,372 --> 00:16:58,273
And hitting.
465
00:16:58,373 --> 00:16:59,953
And catching.
466
00:17:00,053 --> 00:17:02,396
Thankfully, 'cause you were
so good at everything else.
467
00:17:02,496 --> 00:17:04,918
I mean you said you wanted to
be writer when you were what?
468
00:17:05,018 --> 00:17:07,681
In middle school?
469
00:17:07,781 --> 00:17:10,323
You actually did that, man.
470
00:17:10,423 --> 00:17:13,686
You believed that people
would care to read what you,
471
00:17:13,786 --> 00:17:16,128
of all people, have to say.
472
00:17:16,228 --> 00:17:18,171
? ?
473
00:17:18,271 --> 00:17:22,334
- Well, I guess the Sarasota
Herald Tribune said I had a...
474
00:17:22,434 --> 00:17:25,617
relatable voice.
- You are who you are, man.
475
00:17:25,717 --> 00:17:27,819
All right, you're
not gonna be a jock
476
00:17:27,919 --> 00:17:30,140
no matter how many
Wikipedia pages you read.
477
00:17:30,240 --> 00:17:32,022
And what happens on that field
478
00:17:32,122 --> 00:17:35,466
is not gonna change the
way I feel about you.
479
00:17:35,566 --> 00:17:38,708
Even if you split your
pants and crap yourself.
480
00:17:38,808 --> 00:17:40,065
- Well, I didn't know
that was a possibility,
481
00:17:40,089 --> 00:17:41,831
but now that's in my head.
482
00:17:41,931 --> 00:17:43,211
- It's definitely a possibility,
483
00:17:43,292 --> 00:17:44,914
but I do think you can do it.
484
00:17:45,014 --> 00:17:47,036
It's only, like, 20 yards.
485
00:17:47,136 --> 00:17:49,077
? ?
486
00:17:49,177 --> 00:17:50,519
Nice catch.
487
00:17:50,619 --> 00:17:52,200
Looking like a football
player already.
488
00:17:52,300 --> 00:17:53,762
- Yeah, well, you know,
489
00:17:53,862 --> 00:17:55,724
clear eyes, full
hearts, can't lose.
490
00:17:55,824 --> 00:17:57,024
- That's a football reference.
491
00:17:57,064 --> 00:17:58,241
- You don't have
to love football
492
00:17:58,265 --> 00:17:59,727
to love "Friday
Night Lights" right?
493
00:17:59,827 --> 00:18:02,169
- Coach Taylor, right?
- Oh, my God, Kyle Chandler.
494
00:18:02,269 --> 00:18:03,651
It's insane.
- That's my guy.
495
00:18:03,751 --> 00:18:06,294
- So good.
- That's my guy.
496
00:18:06,394 --> 00:18:08,795
- Shouldn't they get started?
What happened to Tom?
497
00:18:10,437 --> 00:18:12,899
- Wait, look.
498
00:18:12,999 --> 00:18:15,862
[uplifting music]
499
00:18:15,962 --> 00:18:22,848
? ?
500
00:18:28,092 --> 00:18:30,555
- Whoo!
- Hey, there, 49 fans,
501
00:18:30,655 --> 00:18:32,437
please welcome to the field
502
00:18:32,537 --> 00:18:36,119
our halftime field goal
contest kicker, Tom Hayworth.
503
00:18:36,219 --> 00:18:38,281
- [chuckles]
504
00:18:38,381 --> 00:18:41,224
[cheers and applause]
505
00:18:43,667 --> 00:18:46,248
- Hey.
506
00:18:46,348 --> 00:18:50,012
No one else here. Okay?
507
00:18:50,112 --> 00:18:52,114
Just me and you in our backyard.
508
00:18:53,475 --> 00:18:56,297
["Come Sail Away" by Styx]
509
00:18:56,397 --> 00:19:03,284
? ?
510
00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:11,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today
511
00:19:12,532 --> 00:19:14,273
- Whoa!
512
00:19:14,373 --> 00:19:17,597
? ?
513
00:19:17,697 --> 00:19:22,001
[whistle blows]
- Oh!
514
00:19:22,101 --> 00:19:24,763
[screaming]
515
00:19:24,863 --> 00:19:27,766
[cheering]
516
00:19:27,866 --> 00:19:32,811
[horn blows]
- Whoo!
517
00:19:32,911 --> 00:19:35,532
- ? Come sail away,
come sail away ?
518
00:19:35,632 --> 00:19:39,076
? Come sail away with me ?
519
00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:46,102
- It also air broils
at the same time.
520
00:19:46,202 --> 00:19:48,064
- I did it. Did I do
it? I did it, right?
521
00:19:48,164 --> 00:19:50,066
- You did it. You did...
[laughs]
522
00:19:50,166 --> 00:19:51,966
- Ah, I'm in so much
pain. Can you believe it?
523
00:19:52,008 --> 00:19:53,749
- No, not really.
How did you do it?
524
00:19:53,849 --> 00:19:57,072
- I... I don't know.
- Ooh-hoo-hoo!
525
00:19:57,172 --> 00:19:59,394
Yeah!
526
00:19:59,494 --> 00:20:01,656
- [sighs] That guy
stole our Gatorade.
527
00:20:05,259 --> 00:20:09,083
[upbeat music]
528
00:20:09,183 --> 00:20:13,006
- Hey, do you have feeling
back in your... ass?
529
00:20:13,106 --> 00:20:15,008
- It's, uh, still
pretty sore but
530
00:20:15,108 --> 00:20:16,930
good news is,
531
00:20:17,030 --> 00:20:18,611
the water, it's gone.
532
00:20:18,711 --> 00:20:21,413
- Oh, great.
533
00:20:21,513 --> 00:20:24,056
[dynamic rock music]
- Guys, it's on.
534
00:20:24,156 --> 00:20:28,220
- And a final note, at
yesterday's 49ers game
535
00:20:28,320 --> 00:20:31,462
one lucky fan got to attempt
a field goal during halftime.
536
00:20:31,562 --> 00:20:33,584
- Look at that, sweetie,
he called you a fan.
537
00:20:33,684 --> 00:20:35,666
- Now, the approach
looks decent,
538
00:20:35,766 --> 00:20:38,389
he connects and
look at that form.
539
00:20:38,489 --> 00:20:41,111
Somebody picked a fight
with gravity and lost.
540
00:20:41,211 --> 00:20:43,433
A little too much
follow through.
541
00:20:43,533 --> 00:20:45,992
- But they're not even showing
my kick go through the... the...
542
00:20:46,016 --> 00:20:47,597
- Uprights.
- The uprights.
543
00:20:47,697 --> 00:20:48,977
- Hey, but at least you made it.
544
00:20:49,019 --> 00:20:50,479
They can't take
that away from you.
545
00:20:50,579 --> 00:20:52,802
- You're right, I scored a
field goal at Levi's Stadium.
546
00:20:52,902 --> 00:20:54,443
How many other
people can say that?
547
00:20:54,543 --> 00:20:56,765
- And it turns out, our
star kicker has quite
548
00:20:56,865 --> 00:20:59,867
the athletic history.
- Oh, my God, no.
549
00:21:07,795 --> 00:21:09,656
[laughter]
550
00:21:09,756 --> 00:21:12,739
- I feel badly for the water.
551
00:21:12,839 --> 00:21:15,102
Well, I guess he shaved
his legs for nothing.
552
00:21:15,202 --> 00:21:16,339
Which is a shame.
- Oh, my God.
553
00:21:16,363 --> 00:21:18,225
How did they get this footage?
554
00:21:18,325 --> 00:21:20,546
- I don't know.
- It's more kind of falling.
555
00:21:20,646 --> 00:21:21,926
If you look closely, right there
556
00:21:22,008 --> 00:21:24,450
at the bottom of the pool,
you can see his dignity.
557
00:21:25,305 --> 00:22:25,588
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558
00:22:25,638 --> 00:22:30,188
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