All language subtitles for Red.Oaks.S01E01.Pilot.RERiP.1080p.AMZN.WEBRip.DD5.1.x264-NTb_track3_eng

Man:
This isn't child's play.

Do you have any idea
how much money it costs

to send someone
to college nowadays?

You must take advantage
of what you've got right now.

I know you're having
a great time,

I know that college
is as wonderful

as you thought it would be,

but your grades are for shit.

You've got to apply yourself.

They have to become better.

What's the big deal?
I still passed.

- Barely.
- A "C" isn't barely passing.

That's a "D".
A "C" is satisfactory.

Yeah. A "C" is a Jewish "F".

Look, honey,
I don't mean to nag,

but I don't understand how
you can get an "A" in, uh--

What was it?

Cinema of the
French New Wave.

An "A" in French cinema, and
you get a "C" in your major.

[sighs] It's not my major yet.

See, this is what
I'm talking about.

What's it gonna
look like in the fall

when you apply to
the CPA program,

and they see that you
barely squeaked by in
Intro Accounting?

Like I don't belong.

Honey, I get it.

I was young once.

First couple of years of college
it's all about having fun.

You go to keggers,
you smoke a little reefer,

you get a little wh--
you know, it's--

You figure things out.

But after a while,
you've got to buckle down.

You've got to
think about the future.

- I know.
- I know you know.

Now, look,
this summer job's
a great start.

Okay, you meet people,
you make contacts.

There are gonna be
a lot of wealthy people

who are gonna remember you
down the road

when they need someone
to do their taxes, okay?

Now, come on.
Let's play another set

before the bugs
get too bad.

Okay.

You serve.

You gonna serve
or what?

- Dad.
- [groaning]

Dad, what's wrong?
You okay?

I think I'm having
a heart attack.

- Hey!
- Ah, ow!

Hey, call 9-1-1.

He's having a
fucking heart attack!

David, David,
I love you so much.

Promise me that you won't make
the same mistakes we did.

Who? Who?

Your mother and I.

We never loved each other.

We should have split years ago
except you came along.

- What?
- [groaning]

I should have married
Sun Yi.

Who's Sun Yi?

She's this girl I knew
in Korea.

Oh, she had
such beautiful eyes.

I-- I love the Orientals.

Okay, okay, well--

David, David, David,
David, David!

- What?
- I think your mother's
a lesbian,

or-- or at least
technically bisexual.

Okay, shh!

Ow.
[groaning]

Okay, I'm here,
I'm here.

- Okay.
- Quickly, please.

- [groaning]
- It's coming,
it's coming.

Man: Good news, folks.
He's gonna be fine.

As heart attacks go,
this was pretty mild.

More of a wake up call to
ditch the cigarettes and
take up jogging.

I've been telling him that
for years.

He doesn't listen to me.

He doesn't--
Does he listen to me?

Can you imagine
seeing your father dying
in front of your eyes?

- Horrible.
- He did this to himself.

- All right, I'm just gonna--
- Okay, well, I know you're
eager to see him,

but keep your voices down
and don't get him too excited.

I'm sorry.

- Whisper.
- Yeah, okay.

Thank you.
Thank you.

You are never to scare me
like that again.

- Honey, I'm sorry.
- Are you kidding me?

- Totally my fault,
I take the blame.
- Yes, it is your fault.

I almost had a heart attack
when I got the call
from our son.

Honey,
I didn't want to have
a heart attack.

And your son
has to see that?

- Do you know how--
- I wanted to have a stroke,

but I didn't know what
the difference was.

[Robbie Dupree's
"Steal Away"]

* Come on and hold me *

* Just like you told me *

* Then show me *

* What I want to know *

* Why don't we
steal away *

* Why don't we
steal away *

Just a review
so we don't have any
misunderstandings.

Base salary is
300 a week.

But the real gelt is in
the private lessons.

$50 an hour which you'll
split with me 60/40.

Am I 60 or 40?

And on a good week,

if you hustle,
you can clear nine bills.

We have other perks
as well.

We eat for free.

King crab, New York strip,
chef salads.

All you have to do
is sign for it.

They serve New York strip
at the staff cafeteria?

How the fuck do I know?
I'm not staff.

You're not?

Neither are you.

Listen,
we're tennis pros, man.

We eat in the dining hall
with the members.

We take a shower in
their locker room,

a steam in their sauna,

and a shit in
their toilets.

The only difference
between them and us

is we do not get to
schtupp their wives,

even if they want you to,
and believe me, boychik,

some of them
will want you to.

Good morning,
Mrs. Shapiro.

Why don't you go ahead
and get warmed up?

I'll be right there.
Case in point.

I could hit that
but I don't.
Do you know why?

Because you're married?

Because she's married and
you never know to whom.

Well, I have a
girlfriend, so--

She's actually the
aerobics instructor.

- Karen?
- Yeah.

She's your girlfriend?

Yeah.

Lovely.

And turn over,
time for doggy style, ladies.

And up, up,

and 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

Great job, ladies.

Same time, same place
tomorrow, okay, guys?

Hi, sweetie.

You look so adorable in
your little tennis outfit.

Yeah.

You want to come over
after work?

Tonight?

Yeah, Mom's been staying at
the hospital 'til 10 or 11,

so we get the house
to ourselves.

Can't tonight, remember?
We have the, uh, party.

What party?

That, uh, staff
summer kick off kegger.

Everyone's going.

Am I allowed to?

I don't see why not.

Because I'm not staff.

I mean, technically.

- Technically?
- According to Nash.

Nash is full of shit.

Um, my next class
is starting.

Uh, come on in, guys.
You should get out of here.

- Yeah.
- Okay. Leave those.

Women aren't fucking
action figures.

No, they're mammals
with fur.

Big bushes are sexy.

Bigger the better.

Like a badger.

Yes, yes,
in a Russian hat.

I love it.
Just get it.

Dude! What are you
doin' here?

I'm the new
assistant tennis pro.

No shit!

I thought you were
workin' for your dad
this summer.

Yeah, I was supposed to,
but luckily this came along
and I snagged it.

I'm happy, I'm happy to
know someone around here
with a decent IQ.

Or who can even spell IQ,
these fuckin' schmoes.

- IQ.
- IQ.

Hey, you goin' to this
staff party tonight?

- Most definite.
- I'll see you then.

All right.

Getty. Fifty bucks says
he won't shake my hand.

[clears throat]

Good morning,
Mr. Getty.

Beautiful automobile
you have here, sir.

- Well, what is it,
a Countach?
- Right.

Do not park it in the sun
or under a tree.

Or anywhere a bird
could shit on it.

- Yes, sir.
- All right, where we
gonna park it?

Uh, not in the sunshine,
in a tree,

or anywhere a bird
might poop on it, sir.

You got it.

You got a good head
on your shoulders, son.

- Thank you, sir.
- What's your name?

- Uh, Wheeler.
- Wheeler. Nice to meet ya.

I've been here for
four summers, sir.

Well, then,
nice to see ya.

[engine revving]

[rock music playing]

You got the poontang,
but who's got the Countach?

- Good morning.
- Hey, Nash,

you think Connors
has a shot at winning
Wimbledon?

Eh, it's hard to say.

He's not getting any younger
and his net game is for shit.

- You ever play him?
- Once.

Who won?

Well, he did make me
work for it.

[laughing]

Nasser.

Skip.

Who is that?

Golf pro.

Cocksucker.

So why NYU?

I don't know.
It's a good school.
Commute's easy.

I mean,
why would you even do
the whole college thing?

Why does anyone?

To get laid.

And hopefully get a job.
No.

Well, you've got a job.

Yeah, but one I can
still be doing when
I'm, like, 40.

Well, I'm 38.

Yeah, but you played on
the pro circuit.

Briefly.

You beat Jimmy Connors.

When he was 12.

Excuse me, darling.
We'll have two
iced teas, please.

Thank you.
Do you want anything else?

No? Just right away,
thank you.

[sighs] You know,
I just hate to see

a bright young fellow
like yourself

throwing away your future
for an education.

And for what?

A desk job and
a fax machine?

Two weeks paid vacation
in Florida?

I spent the entire winter
in Florida

on the resort circuit
getting paid to
work on my tan.

So, take a look.

Compare. Look at that.
Look at the difference.

I'm miles ahead of you.
Mine is perfection.

Look down at my arm.

It's got a chain on it.
See that?

David. Hey!

What were you looking at?

Ah, yes, a piece of ass.

You the new assistant pro?

Yeah, I'm David.

[scoffs]
What are you, about 12?

- No.
- I'm Doug Getty.

Wanna hit?

- Excuse me?
- It'll be fun for ya.

Are you asking to
book a lesson?

Fine, whatever.
I'll pay for the hour, okay?

- Can we play already?
- Okay, let me get my racket.

Good.
Get your racket, David.

What are you doin'?

Hitting you balls.

You're fucking
kidding me, right?

No ball, we just play.

- Okay.
- Let's-- let's play.

Anything specific you'd
like to work on today?

- My serve.
- Uh, okay.

- Let's start--
- No, I'm saying my serve.

I'll serve.

Put the balls away.
I will serve to you.

Jesus Christ.

[Billy Squier's "The Stroke"]

* Now everybody *

* Have you heard *

All right.
You ready?

Here we go.

* Then the stroke's
the word *

* Don't take no rhythm *

* Don't take no style *

* Got a thirst for killin' *

* Grab your vial and *

All right,
I see how it is.

Let's play for real now.

Look at this.
Yeah, all right. Fuck!

* Give a firm handshake *

* Talk to me *

That might drop,
you don't know.

Hey, Mr. Getty, remember
your follow through.

- Don't talk.
- I just think--

You understand what I mean?
Don't talk.

When the words
come out, wrong.

* Both far and wide *

You fucker!

Good for you.
Good for you.

This is where it
turns around.

Oh! Oh, look at that.

All right,
don't blame yourself.
That happens.

Oh!

* Stroke, stroke, stroke *

Nice point,
Mr. Getty.

Let's go.

* Stoke me, stroke me *

* Say you're a winner,
man you do the sinnin' now *

Fuck!

Good game.

You have to eat.

- No.
- You have to.

This food is so bland
it's like Army chow.

David. David.
Do me a favor.

Go to the corner,
get me some White Castle,
will you, please?

Oh, no, don't you dare,
David.

- Just six.
- Don't you dare.

A half a dozen
doesn't hurt anybody.

Okay, your White Castle
days are over.

- Stop it.
- When you get home--

No, when you get home,
you are going on a diet,

you're gonna do my
Richard Simmons tapes
with me,

and you are not gonna be
sneaking those menthols,

those nasty menthols
that I found in your--

- All right, then.
- So, how are we doing in here?

Ah, great,
how are you?

Has anyone ever told you

that you have the most
beautiful eyes?

Okay, everything
sounds great.

- I'll see you in 45.
- I'll see you later.

**[radio]

Hey! Hi.

How's your dad?

He's okay.
It's just gotten so weird.

What do you mean?

Nothing.

Nothing?

Uh-huh.

I get it.
My family's weird, too.

Hey, why don't we look at
apartments this weekend?

Okay, I'm getting
ahead of myself.

How about we just
focus on tonight,

and we have the
best night ever,
just you and me,

and we'll go from there.

Interesting.

All right.

Tonight is gonna be
so perfect.

* Party people,
I want you to clap *

* It's I, Bo Darren,
devestatin' rap *

* And if you can,
you jam with me *

* Somebody say, oak tree *

- [giggling]
- Oh, hey,
there's Wheeler.

Oh, those are
my friends.

Um, I'll come
find you later.

Bye, sweetie.

[coughing]
Boba Fett?

He's a badass.

He wears cargo pants,
for Christ sake.

You want badass?
Try Scaramanga.

Who?

"The Man with
the Golden Gun."

These fuckin'
Philistines.

[laughs]
You're kidding.

Which one of you
is Wheeler?

Uh, the one you went to
high school with.

And junior high.

I pissed on your mom's couch
at your Spider Man sleepover
in third grade.

No clue.

Also, our moms are
best friends, dude.

You know me.

Oh, yeah.
I hear you got weed.

- I'll see you later.
- See you later, dude.

Maybe, maybe not.

- How much you need?
- Just a dime.

I can help you out.
Hold this, Alan.

Nice.

Shit better not be
all stems and seeds.

No guarantees.

How's Misty, dude?

Not my fuckin'
problem anymore.

You two broke up?

Wow, I'm--
I'm really sorry.

I'm not.
[laughs]

- Alan.
- Yeah.

Get the fuck
off my car.

Sure.

Nash: He gives them rooms
and a chore wheel,

and decides who does
which chores.

Woman: Uh-huh.
Hey, don't miss.

- Don't miss.
- Nash: Focus, it's
all in the hips.

Both: Ahh!

Nash: Boom. You sure?
You had the option,
tops or bottoms.

Boychick,
when did you get here?

- Just now.
- Flying solo tonight?

No lovely Karen
by your side.

No, she, yeah,
she's somewhere.

- She's-
- Mm.

Where's your wife?

She died. Yeah.

Earlier today, yes.
Very sudden, very tragic.

I'm still picking up
the pieces.

Shit.
I'm sorry to hear that.

- Thank you.
- Hi. I'm Dawn.

Oh, pardon me.
Where are my manners?

Dawn is a
massage therapist here.

And, uh, Kimberly
waitresses in the grill.

- Hi.
- I thought you
looked familiar.

- Want to play?
- I-- I don't.

No, there's
too many mosquitoes.

The itching and--
It sucks.

No kidding.
Ugh.

Little fuckers love me.

And what do you
taste like, Nash?

Cardamom and
Drakkar Noir.

Keeps the skin young.

Uh, David,
where are you going?

- To find Karen.
- Well, hang on a minute,
please.

We need to have
a little talk.

Caused a bit of a problem.

You know the, uh,
chap you were

playing tennis with
earlier today?

Getty?

[gasping]

Mm.
[sighs]

It can wait.

So, who wants to be
the bedroom wife?

You know, I'm getting
really into crystals.

Really?

You can, like,
put 'em on your body,

and sort of do things
to your energy.

I heard about that.

Kind of like the
healing powers of
different crystals.

- Right?
- Yeah.

Oh, there you are.

- Honey.
- Hi.

Barry, this is
my boyfriend David.

- Hey, buddy.
- Barry here is a
freelance photographer

who shoots
all the weddings and
bar mitzvahs here.

Obviously, it's not why
I went to art school.

Working here
pays my condo fees
and that ain't bad.

Heats my "Jacuzz,"
let's me pursue my
real passion.

- Magic?
- No, bro.

Fashion photography.
Matter of fact,

I've been trying to
convince Goldie Locks here

to pose for me sometime.

She is really beautiful,
isn't she?

Yeah, no shit, Sherlock,
she's fucking "georgeous."

I'll talk to
you guys later.

Nice to meet you,
Doug.

David.

Big whoop.

Magic. Really?

That guy? That guy
is so full of shit.

What, now you don't think
I'm pretty enough to model?

Not stupid enough to
believe that line.

Barry is just a friend.

Who wants you to
wear his balls
like clay mask.

Perv.

Mm.

Never seen you
so jealous before.

Did someone bring
his putter?

- Nine wood.
- Try six.

Move out of the way.
Move it!

Hey, Misty.

What's goin' on
up there in that tree?

It's a wicked party, huh?

Everyone's having
a very good time.

No offense, but I kinda
wanted to be alone.

I'm sorry,
but I cannot allow a woman
as beautiful as yourself

to be sitting all alone
up in that tree.

I'm coming up to
sit on that other branch.

[grunting]

Ow! Ow!

Fuck it.

I'm physically not able
to be with you.

Why do I know you?

I was your
Driver's Ed partner.

Oh, my God.

I'm sorry.

What a total
ditz I am, yeah.

Nah. It was
a long time ago.

Feels like a lifetime.

- Yeah.
- I was still brunette then.

And I was still fat.

[laughing]

You're funny.
I remember that.

You want to go to my car,
and smoke some marijuana
with me?

Yeah, get me out of
this tree.

I got you.

You have really nice legs,
by the way.

Oh, my God.
[laughs]

[gasps]
Oh, my God.

[gasps]
Are you okay?

Oh.

I'm fine.

I'm-- I'm better now.

What are you
thinking about?

I hope nothing
crawls up my ass.

Be serious, please.

I'm not thinking
about anything.

Your mind's a total blank?

Yeah.

It's taken some effort,
but, yeah.

Kinda diggin' it.

I think I should
do it more often.

Not think?

Mm-hmm.

Just, you know, be.

[sighs]

Do you want to know what
I was thinking about?

Well,

I was imagining when
you're done at NYU,

and we both have
good jobs,

and a cute little
place together,

garbage disposal,
curtains,

maybe even a cat,

I was thinking...

oh, my God,

we could be
members here one day.

And that would be perfect.

[inhaling]
Did he give you a reason?

Yeah, he said he wasn't
ready for the real thing.

Whatever that means.

Douchier version of
it's not you, it's me.

See, you're just
assuming it means

he wants to
screw other people.

That, too.

I know you don't want to
hear this right now,

but I think you're
better off.

He's a dick.

Always has been.

You deserve better.

Thanks.

God, look at him.

He doesn't even see me.

He's such a tool.

He won't let me eat pizza.

Says it'll make me look fat
in my bathing suit.

I don't know
what it has to do
with saving people.

I don't even know
if he knows CPR.

I think he cheated
on the test.

He just looks at himself
in the mirror
whenever we have sex.

He's never once
looked into my eyes.

What are you doing?

Taking this thing
for a spin.

For old time's sake.
Driver's Ed class.

Oh, my God!

What are you doing?
Oh, my God.

I don't know, maybe--
Oh, my God!

Whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa!

Mike, you're running away
from your feelings!

- Asshole!
- Fuck you, Wheeler!

Karen, put your clothes on,
you slut.

Dude, this summer's
gonna be awesome.

Love you, bitch!

Whoo!

I read a book about Buddha,

who, turns out, wasn't like
the Chinese Santa,

but actually this skinny
Indian dude.

Anyways, Buddha believed
life is basically a
big wheel of suffering.

A merry-go-round
we're all stuck on.

Wow.

I just keep thinkin'
about my dad.

I love both my parents.
They're so different.

How did they meet?

How did they get together?

They had to be
happy once, right?

The only thing is,
we're not really stuck
on the merry-go-round.

It's just an illusion.
We stay on it by choice.

'Cause most people are
just too scared to get off.

We had a good time at
mini putt, did we not?

- But you're married.
- Don't be so provincial,
darling.

In many cultures, it is
customary for a man to
take several wives.

In fact,
in my own home country,

the role of wife number two
is held in considerable esteem,

as you would be exempt from
many menial household duties.

That's not gonna be us.
We're so much alike,

and we want the
exact same things.

We're made for each other.

You can get off, Misty.
Tonight. Right now.

All you've gotta do is
take a chance.

Do something
totally spontaneous.

[water splashing]

Whoa. You're cool.

[chanting]

[screaming]

**

- Ahh.
- There he is.

Nash.

- Having fun?
- Ah, epic.

Yeah? Good.

Epic. I mean,
look at that.

You might want to
take it a bit easy
with that.

You know that little problem
that I mentioned earlier?

- Uh, Getty?
- Yes, Getty.

Really should have
finished my thought earlier,

but, uh, the arousals
were overwhelming.

He's the president
of the club,

and, well, he unfortunately
thinks that your game is not

strong enough for you
to be employed here.

What, wait,
are you kidding me?

I-- I beat him.

He said he got
three games off you.

Yeah, because I let him.

He was such a
sore fucking loser,

I felt sorry for him.

Mm-hm.

He wants me to fire you.

Well-- well don't.
Don't-- Please, don't.

Okay, Nash,
I-- I need this job.

I can't spend the summer
working for my dad.

Well, I won't have any choice
if you don't wipe the court
with him.

I mean it. He can't get
a single game off of you.

- Not one.
- What do you mean?

I got him to
agree to a rematch.

All you have to do
is defeat him six-nil,

and you get to
keep your job.

- When?
- Tomorrow morning.

Actually, in four hours.

So, you know,
shake it off,

or you're fucked.

Coffee?

Looks like your boy
is a no show.

Let's just give him
a few more minutes.

See, this is exactly
what I'm talkin' about,
Nasser.

It's not skills
the kid is lacking,

it's maturity.
It's respect for the game,

it's respect for people.
The kid's a punk.

No, the kid's a punk,
he doesn't belong here.

He should be working a
fry station at McDonald's.

That's a great shirt,
by the way.

What the fuck
are you talkin' about?

Matches your wristband.

Good morning,
gentlemen.

- Jesus Christ.
- There he is.

Here. Drink this.

[coughing]
What is this?

Hair of the dog.
Absolut and Gatorade.

[sighs]
Can't do it, man.

I'm hurting so bad.
I can't do it.

David, you are going to
fucking do it.

Why, Nash?
Why do you care?

Dt-dt-dt-dt!
Don't.

Look, I'm building up
to something,

don't betray my
motivational speech.

- Okay.
- I suppose you remind me of
myself when I was your age.

I mean, you're more of
a white person.

Clearly less well endowed
from what I can see

through those
delicate shorts.

But gifted.
Not of heart,
not of hustle.

Also, none of the other
applicants I interviewed
would agree

to the shitty split
you accepted on the
hourly rate.

60/40? Oh, Jesus,
what a schmuck. Oy!

Now, go get 'em, tiger.

Get the balls.

**

* Lost on some bad road
to the river *

* Lying in bed for a week *

* I heard a voice say
tonight by the river *

* You will find
something unique *

* In my dreams you are
looking for me *

**

* Out in the streets you can
hear church bells ringing *

* Voices cry out
from below *

* What saves us from death is
the song that they're singing *

* Fear is beginning to show *

* We were praying
for a miracle *

**

**

Fuck!

**

I'll get it back from you
in a week or two.

You.

You got better in
the last 24 hours.

Uh, just luckier.

Mm, mm, mm.
Don't do that.

What?

Don't play modest.
It's patronizing.

Listen, if you beat a man,
you may piss him off,

but he'll respect you.

But if you patronize him,
then what happens is

you've made an enemy.

And believe me
when I tell you,

you do not want me
as an enemy.

Yeah.

Ask around.

That was
fan-fucking-tastic!

You were incredible
out there, kid, come here.

You should be
very proud of yourself.

I never doubted you
for a second.

Even when you hit those
three straight volleys
into the net,

you kept your cool,
you persevered.

God, by the end
you were like a silk blouse
dancing on a clothesline.

[laughs]
Poetry in motion.

What's this?

Oh, this?

This is your cut of
the winnings.

You bet on the match?

I bet on the match.
$500 a game.

You just made me
three grand.

Come here.

Ahh!

I'm getting you drunk on
Harvey Wallbangers tonight,
my friend.

Now, go ahead and
get cleaned up,
you're disgusting.

- Okay.
- Get a move on.

And brush your teeth.

Hey.
What are you reading?

"Delta of Venus."
How is it?

For erotica,
surprisingly boring.

- I'm David.
- I know.

And you are?

[sighs]

You're not gonna
tell me your name?

No.

Why not?

More fun to make you
work for it.

Okay, how about this?
Uh, tell me your name,

and I'll give you
a free tennis lesson.

I hate tennis.

Then what are you
doing here?

I was curious
if you were any good.

Well, and I wanted to
watch you beat him.

You know that asshole?

Oh, yeah,
he's my father.

See you around.

David.

[Roger Hodgson's "Had a Dream
(Sleeping with the Enemy)"]

* Had a dream *

* I was born *

* To be naked in
the eye of the storm *

* And now it's standing
right in front of me *

* What's it gonna do to me *

* Who knows *

* Had a dream *

* It was time *

* To be taken to
the front of the line *

* Well, that is not
a place you wanna be *

* Sleeping with the enemy *

* You know *

* I don't care *

* What the future brings *

* Give a damn *

* About anything *

* I'd be fine *

* If they'd only
leave me alone *

* But it's time *

* Gotta take a stance *

* 'Cause I won't *

* Get a second chance *

* And I know *

* Now I have to
make it alone *