All language subtitles for Escape to the Chateau DIY S01E16.720p.CBC.WEB-DL.DD2.0.H.264-BTN.English

♪ ♪

I'm Dick Strawbridge, and along
with my wife Angel and our two

children, we left the U.K. for
a whole new life in France

and bought this
magnificent chateau.

We haven't ever regretted what
we've done.

It is so worth it.

We've gradually been making it
into our home, as well as

running it as a business.

That's a long way up.

But it turns out we're not
alone, as dozens of Brits are

doing exactly the same thing.

♪ ♪

[kid laughs]

Sometimes you have to pinch
yourself to think,

"I own that."

Dick: In this series, Angel and
I will reveal more about our

journey as chateau owners--

Quite a lot of scrap here.

It's worth money.

I might be able to pay you this
time.

--and guide these daring Brits
where we can--

[both laugh]

It's a solid old bridge, matey.

- --as they renovate--
- Tim: This is looking good.

I'm quite happy with this.

Dick:--repair--

I've never done this before, so
it should be all right.

Dick:--and struggle to transform
these buildings into their homes

and businesses.

Go, go, go, go, go, go, go.

Absolutely magnificent.

Philip: This is the glamorous
chateau life that everyone

thinks I need.

Just trying to avoid getting my
face near the toilet seat.

This is not the way to make
money.

Dick: But however hard the going
gets, these plucky Brits can

always say they're kings and
queens of their very own

castles.

Woman: Cheers.

Chin chin.

♪ ♪

Dick: Today:

It's when you need someone like
Dick Strawbridge.

I mean, he'd understand
something like this.

Dick: One couple's expansion
plans are under threat from

hundreds of bees.

Tim: Look at that.

They're swarming.

Dick: And some tractor
trouble.

[engine stalls]

Tim: Can't believe I've just
done this.

An incredibly stupid thing to
do.

♪ ♪

Dick: There's design
disagreement at this very

ambitious renovation project.

Nicole: Can you do it with a
glass roof?

Absolutely [bleeps].

Yes, we will do that.

Definitely.

[laughing] I'm actually being
serious.

♪ ♪

Dick: And at our beautiful
chateau, my mind's on food--

You can put cheese in here.

You know, all sorts of salamis
and meats and things can go in

here.

--building a food smoker.

This is the subtle way of
lighting.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Dick: Meet Essex-born Tim and
his Dutch wife Margreeth.

They own and run this imposing
looking building: Chateau des

Lys.

♪ ♪

Dick: Built in the mid-19th
century, it was once a boys'

school.

The couple are now into their
fourth year running it as a B&B.

♪ ♪

Tim: I see this place as being a
bit like a cross between sort of

The Addams Family and
Fawlty Towers, you know?

I mean, it's kind of lovely.

On the other hand, you can look
at it as kind of forbidding.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

Dick: Before giving up
everything for their new life in

France, Tim was a bassist in a
successful band and Margreeth

was a teacher.

[laughter]

It's so great to do something
totally new and out of your

comfort zone.

Tim: Yeah.

And in Holland, our lives were
very, very separate.

He always worked weekends,
evenings, holidays.

And yeah, we really like being
together still.

It's amazing.

- We're very lucky.
- Margreeth: Yeah.

♪ ♪

Dick: Situated in Northern
France in the Picardie region,

it's a big place.

64 rooms--five of them used for
bed and breakfast--and two

holiday cottages on the 14-acre
grounds.

♪ ♪

Tim: I love this place, think
it's great.

When we arrived, it was
basically one enormous bat's

nest, actually, I have to say.

Dick: It's the start of the
summer season, and they're busy

entertaining guests.

Margreeth: This is our veranda.

This is where our guests
normally have their breakfast.

And we use this a lot as well.

Arguably the nicest place in the
chateau to sit and just look out

the window.

And for the price of less than a
house in London, you can get all

this with all the land and
everything.

Dick: They're reluctant to
reveal exactly how much they

paid for it, but I reckon they
got a bargain.

- Margreeth: It's wow.
- Tim: Yeah.

Margreeth: Still wow.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

Margreeth: Of course, it costs a
lot of money to live in a place

like this.

I think it works out about
somewhere between 5,000 and

6,000 a month to run this place.

Margreeth: It's actually a bit
more than that.

It's actually nearly 8,000.

We don't really make money here
yet.

♪ ♪

Dick: At the moment, they barely
break even, but this year, Tim

and Margreeth are determined to
make a profit, so they've come

up with a bold idea:

Running a caravan park.

Tim: Last weekend, if we had had
these things in place, we would

have earned another 1,000 euros
for that week.

That's--you know, we had so much
demand.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

Dick: They have their first
caravan booking for later in the

summer, but the park doesn't
exist yet.

Their only caravan is a complete
mess, and it's parked in the

wrong field.

So first up, Tim needs to tow it
into place with this tiny

tractor.

Good luck, mate.

♪ ♪

The battery's not
working--[chuckles]--so I've had

to replace it with another one,
except the size of the batteries

in this particular area do not
correspond with the size of the

hole in the engine.

I found a battery which fits to
within about 25 millimetres,

so I'm gonna have to saw off the
last 25 millimetres.

Dick: Not a good idea.

Do not try this at home.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

[bleep]

That's a--that is an incredibly
stupid thing to do.

I can't--I can't believe I've
just done this.

Dick: Nor can I.

It's now dangerous, and it's
leaking sulphuric acid.

This battery needs to be
recycled.

But Tim got a sealant gun, and
he's got other ideas.

It normally hardens up pretty
quickly actually, so it actually

might have worked.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

Except that it didn't.

Dick: Take two.

♪ ♪

- Tim: Still leaking.
- [birds chirping]

Dick: I'll be gobsmacked if this
ever works.

[sighs]

- It hasn't work.
- Dick: No surprises there.

I'm beginning to learn Tim's not
the type to give up.

Incredibly, he's decided to
place the battery on its side.

I don't see a reason why it
shouldn't work.

♪ ♪

Dick: It may function, but it
will leak and give off dangerous

gases.

♪ ♪

Tim: Well I'll tell you what, it
fits a lot better like that.

[laughs]

If I had put it like that
originally, it wouldn't need

to saw anything off.

Dick: Definitely do not try this
at home.

♪ ♪

Dick: Ah, a trusty universal
engine starter.

[engine starts up]

Dick: Ah, the sweet sound--

- [engine stalls]
- Dick:--of stalling.

♪ ♪

Dick: Sounds like you've run out
of diesel.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

Dick: Like Tim, there's nothing
I like more than tinkering

around an old engine, or even
better, building my own

invention.

♪ ♪

Dick: Luckily for me, I've got a
chateau full of treasures left

behind by the previous owners.

Lookit there.

That barrel is amazing
condition.

I've got a plan for one of these
old barrels.

If there's one thing I love as
much as engineering, it's food.

♪ ♪

Dick: I've been building my own
food smokers as a hobby for

years.

It's about time I made my first
one for the chateau.

I think I built my first smoker
probably 30 years ago out of an

oil drum.

All you have to do is put a
smokebox outside it, put some

smoke into it, and you get
smoked food.

♪ ♪

Dick: Now I just need a stove
for the fire.

It's another treasure hunt.

♪ ♪

Dick: I just love the fact that
every time you come to the

attic, you find something.

That's almost too pretty.

♪ ♪

Dick: I'll use that probably as
a stove, as opposed to a smoker.

♪ ♪

[laughs]

Dick: And this little burner
should be perfect.

I reckon it's from the '20s or
'30s, and looks pretty much

purpose-built.

It looks like it's meant to be
smoking food.

And this is so ridiculous.

Hmm, hello.

[laughs]

It's better than that!

It opens and shuts to regulate
the amount of smoke.

I thought I was gonna have to
build something do that.

Way to go!

♪ ♪

Dick: I've done lots of
different types of smokers.

This is a cold smoker.

I have a lovely oak barrel, and
I'm going to cut it up.

Wooden barrels, oil drums, even
a filing cabinet can all be

turned into cold smokers.

And there's very little heat
involved.

Most materials will work,
including sturdy cardboard.

Beside that, I've got my little
stove, and there's a pipe going

between the two.

In the little stove, there's a
little firebox, and the smoke in

there is warm.

But by the time it's moved down
the pipe and into my barrel,

it'll be cool.

♪ ♪

Dick: It's simple:

Create an opening at one end of
the smoker, fit a civil pipe,

and connect to some kind
of a stove holding your fire.

♪ ♪

Dick: Fills this, everything in
there gets smoked, and all my

excess smoke goes out the top.

You can put cheese in here.

You know, all sorts of salamis
and meats and things can go in

here, and they will get smoke
flavour in them without them

cooking.

♪ ♪

Dick: I fancy some French cheese
as the first food into the

Strawbridge smoker.

Just half a mile down the road,
there's a fromagerie who

specializes in beautiful soft
cheeses.

Perfect.

[speaking in French]

[woman speaking in French]

I think they understand what's
going on.

[both speaking in French]

Dick: I was thinking what we
could do is keep one to the side

as a control.

- Yeah.
- Smoke two.

Angel: Yeah, I'm up for that.

Dick: We're gonna be so full of
cheese.

- Woman: Thank you.
- Angel: Au revoir.

Au revoir, bye-bye.

Thank you.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

Dick: One of the delights of
smoking is experimenting with

different types of wood which
will all add flavour.

I reckon the shavings from the
chateau apple trees will be

lovely.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Dick: This is the subtle way of
lighting.

[window creaks]

Dick: Darling, it will be six
hours of gentle smoking,

followed by 24 hours of waiting,
followed by cheese.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

Dick: After a frankly agonizing
wait, it's the moment of truth.

♪ ♪

- Oh!
- Oh, man!

Yummy, yummy.

♪ ♪

Mm.

- Mm, that works, baby.
- Dick: Delicious.

Just as I knew it would be.

When you sit down at a table,
it's got your food on it,

and you're thinking to yourself,
"Aww, life's good."

Angel: It's beautiful.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

Dick: Angel and I have spent
almost three years doing up our

French chateau, and we're
nowhere near finished.

But that's the commitment you
take on with these magnificent

buildings.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

Dick: This is Chateau
d'Humierès, a crumbling 18th

century castle, home to designer
Nicole and her architect

boyfriend Stephan.

He's very skilled at doing the
construction and pulling the

building back together.

My thing isn't that, it's more
the aesthetic side of things.

I'm into old buildings.

I love old buildings.

I love the old stone.

I love this region.

And lucky.

Hectic but lucky.

[birds chirping]

Every day gives us some new
challenges of going

traumatically wrong sometimes,
but it's an adventure.

That's what's fun.

♪ ♪

Dick: Nicole from London has
been helping Belgian Stephan

restore this 12-acre pile since
they met three years ago.

Stephan: I think the castle has
about--how many rooms we have?

No idea.

I don't know if I've ever
counted.

No.

Dick: Situated in the
Pas-de-Calais region of northern

France, Stephan originally
bought this place with his

parents.

But since they passed away, he
and Nicole have been turning it

into their home.

♪ ♪

Dick: But they desperately need
to bring in some cash,

so they've hit on a plan to
renovate the chateau's crumbling

main hall and open it as a
tearoom.

We're just doing a preliminary
kinda clean.

It's got years of grime on the
walls, and in the corners by the

window.

And soon, it needs to stop
draining money.

Nicole: Yeah.

It needs to be not generating
money, but at least to be

self-financing.

Nicole: We plan to have the
tearoom opening towards sometime

in August.

Now we're mid-May.

It's like no time at all.

♪ ♪

Dick: Just three months to gut
this wreck, create a new

kitchen, and turn it into a
tearoom.

I reckon that makes them
supremely confident or a little

deluded.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

Stephan: So let's have a look
underneath here and see what's

happening there.

Dick: This morning, they're
working on what will be the

tearoom's main entrance.

Stephan wants to get rid of the
ugly flagstone paving outside

and is keen to see if there are
any original features beneath.

Stephan: It's huge.

Nicole: You think it's bigger
than the other one?

Stephan: It's a gigantic stone.

[chatter]

- Man: I think it's concrete.
- Nicole: Oh, really?

- Stephan: My goodness.
- Man: Yeah, that's concrete.

Dick: All their digging has
revealed is plain concrete.

[dog barks]

Dick: Not quite the period
feature they were hoping for.

Stephan: Well I'm disappointed.

♪ ♪

Dick: Never fear, designer
Nicole is bound to find a way of

turning boring concrete into
something beautiful.

We're going to pull up a metre
20 either sides of the step,

and then hopefully create
some kind of--so sweep in.

♪ ♪

Dick: It's turning into a major
excavation, but after an hour's

hard graft, Nicole's plan is
already taking shape.

Nicole: That is absolutely the
entrance.

Dick: And there's a surprise for
Stephan.

Cobblestone.

This is a cobblestone.

♪ ♪

Stephan: Look, Nicole, they're
gigantic.

Just so beautiful.

- See, I had a good idea.
- [Nicole laughs]

♪ ♪

Dick: What a result.

Past the edge of the concrete,
Stephan stumbled upon the

chateau's original 18th century
cobblestones.

They could clean up and be a
perfect entrance for the

tearoom.

Never thought we were going to
find such beautiful stones under

here.

They're from the--from the first
part of the castle, so from

first build of the castle.

Should be 1780s.

Dick: But now, Stephan's left
with a couple of tonnes of

rubble, and no easy way to move
it.

♪ ♪

Dick: Although, he thinks he may
have the answer.

So this monster has been
standing here I think for about

ten years.

Dick: What a magnificent beast.

But he's going to need a lot of
luck if he wants to get it

started.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Dick: Renovating a chateau is
all about being resourceful and

making the best of what you've
got.

Back in our place in northwest
France, Angel's a bit of an

expert when it comes to seeing
the potential in almost

anything.

This colour is quite
fashionable, isn't it,

but I just don't like it.

[chuckles]

Paint stripper [chuckles].

Dick: Angel wants to strip away
the hideous green yet still

maintain the door's original
character.

The process is simple enough,
but we easily have 100 doors in

this place, pretty much all in
need of some kind of attention.

So we're gonna do this bit
first, and then when I sort of

get to about
here--[coughs]--I'll put some on

there, so it'll be a bit of a
rolling effect, and I'll go down

the door.

♪ ♪

Dick: This one door will most
likely take Angel two hours to

bring it to life.

Angel: Dick had to strip some of
these doors at the start because

we had--we had lead paint
basically.

Once we started stripping them,
it was just a revelation.

They looked really good.

And it was kind of cheap.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

Dick: A good wooden door can
easily cost £100 new.

Multiply that by the number
we've got, and you're looking at

thousands of pounds.

My pockets aren't that deep.

We can't afford to replace
everything.

It's just crazy.

Love keeping the character of
the house.

This is what I'm here to do.

This is my calling in life, to
look after old things.

[snorts and chuckles]

I love Dick [chuckles].

There's just so many different
parts to a door.

Just finding what bits works for
each.

You don't scratch the door.

Dick: Deep scratches might mean
the wood needs sanding down.

Or in bad cases, a squeeze of
wood filler.

Extra work you don't need, so
it's worth taking care.

I mean, just look how beautiful
these doors are underneath.

Why did they paint them green?

I don't know.

♪ ♪

Angel: The problem is I'm always
under like the time schedule

with the kids coming home soon
[chuckles].

Dick: That's the problem with
jobs in the chateau.

Sometimes everyday life takes
over.

It was weeks later before the
door could finally be hung,

but it was worth it.

♪ ♪

I was very, very surprised of
how well it turned out.

Even more surprised when we put
a matte varnish on to seal it.

Kind of dulled down the tones a
little bit.

And I've actually got something
that I really love.

♪ ♪

Dick: So far, we spent a
relatively modest three years

renovating our chateau.

Check out this place that's a
decade in and counting.

♪ ♪

Dick: For a thousand years,
overlooking the hills of

Lautrec, astute Chateau de
Brametourte.

The medieval fort is the
ancestral home of the famous

painter, Henri de
Toulouse-Lautrec.

Lovely view.

It's now owned by IT specialist
Paul and his wife Alison--an HR

consultant--who paid £650,000
for the chateau ten years ago.

We had a list of things we were
looking for, and top of the list

was that there had to be a wow
factor associated with it.

This definitely had the wow
factor.

♪ ♪

Alison: And also, somewhere that
had lots of materials that we

could use for the restoration,
that was old tiles, roofing

tiles, floor files, old doors.

Paul: Yeah.

Alison: We brought a friend to
look at it, and she said,

"Do you realize there's a fine
line between a renovation

opportunity and a ruin?

And I think you're really
looking at a ruin here."

[Paul laughs]

♪ ♪

Dick: They've worked for over a
decade to breathe new life into

this French relic and turn it
into a B&B.

These windows were originally
just plastic over the hole in

the wall.

We had a local craftsman make
these reproduction antique

windows, certainly add to the
chateau, make it feel authentic.

Dick: Located in the south of
France in the Languedoc region,

the local vineyards echo with a
sound of ongoing renovation

works.

Paul is making an outdoor
kitchen so that this summer's

paying guests can have food and
drink by the swimming pool.

As with every job, he recycles
the original material from the

chateau.

Paul: So this is some old oak.

In a number of the rooms, we
took out the floorboards.

But if you cut off the crumbly
bits, and the bits that have

been eaten, it's really solid.

Oak has a heart, and that
becomes as hard as steel over

time.

So by trimming them up and
reusing them, we can make a very

rustic looking kitchen, and
we've kind of restored part of

the heritage of the house.

♪ ♪

Dick: Even though they do most
of the renovations themselves,

this place still costs an arm
and a leg.

Alison: The budget is around
50,000 euros to run this place

each year, which means that Paul
and I are doing contract work.

We just want to be here
[chuckles]--

Yeah.

--because it's a fabulous place.

♪ ♪

Dick: This year, they're hoping
to give up their contract work

and run the chateau full time by
hosting more weddings.

Events will bring in more profit
than the B&B and the small tea

parties they hold.

♪ ♪

We've gotta really plan the next
few months very carefully.

We've got to make absolutely
sure that the kitchen is

operational, that we've got
furniture and everything

organized.

What are you doing?

- You've got your--
- I'm doing all of that.

I don't know what you're doing.

[both laugh]

♪ ♪

Dick: But there's one job that
Paul has avoided all winter.

Their swimming pool is the
centrepiece for the wedding

events.

It's been slowly losing water,
and the decking has subsided,

making it dangerous.

Paul: This decking settled down
six inches, so we've got a small

problem.

But I think also that might be
the cause of why the water's

leaking, because there's a few
pipes that come out here, and if

the soil settled down, it could
have snapped the pipes.

So that could be the cause of
the water leak, so I gotta dig

up all the side of the pool.

It's gonna be really hard to
repair.

♪ ♪

Dick: They need it fixed before
a big wedding in a month's time.

♪ ♪

Alison: We're a little bit under
pressure because the swimming

pool's right in front of the
chapiteau, which is French for

"marquee."

It's all leaking away.

Where is it going?

We don't want our customers to
disappear down the side of the

hill as the water washes the
clay area away.

♪ ♪

Dick: Alison's off on a
three-week business trip to

Australia and is expecting Paul
to have it sorted by the time

she gets back.

Paul: It's not a job I'm looking
forward to, to be honest.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

Dick: Some 550 miles north, back
at Tim and Margreeth's chateau

in Picardie, they're attempting
to create a new caravan park to

bring in much-needed revenue.

Tim's trying to tow his caravan
to its new home in the next

field, but he's having tractor
trouble.

He spent hours trying to fit a
new battery, but the problem is

much simpler.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

Well, I've got a feeling that
it's run out of petrol or

diesel [chuckles].

Dick: Ya numpty.

I told ya.

Tim: How you doing?

Suppose you could just pull the
caravan.

Dick: Might be quicker at this
rate.

Tim: I'm hoping that this is the
problem why the engine stopped.

[engine starts up]

Dick: Success.

But very wisely, Tim's not keen
on driving the tractor with acid

pouring out of his battery.

- [engine rumbling]
- [laughs]

What I'm gonna do now is be
very, very careful not to stall

it.

♪ ♪

Dick: Once it's been fired up,
the alternator can keep the

engine ticking over without a
battery, but it's not great for

the engine.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Dick: All Tim's got to do now is
hook up the caravan and tow it

away.

Good luck with that.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

[Dick laughs]

Dick: I think that's what kids
today call an epic fail.

Tim: I have to say it's beaten
me.

This hasn't moved an inch.

That's it.

So yeah, size matters [laughs].

Dick: It sure does.

Lucky for Tim, his neighbour is
willing to lend a hand with this

beauty.

Tim: He's manoeuvred it into
position.

I'm gonna have to say it's
brilliant bit of driving.

♪ ♪

Dick: The caravan may now be in
the right place, but it still

needs a complete makeover.

It'll be spruced up, put some
glass in the windows, change the

top bit, change the bottom bit,
stick a new chassis on it.

Dick: Just a bit of work then.

[birds chirping]

♪ ♪

Dick: Back at Nicole and
Stephan's chateau in the

Pas-de-Calais.

They've a tight deadline to turn
a grand-but-derelict hole into a

high-end tearoom and terrace so
the chateau can start paying for

itself.

♪ ♪

Dick: But the exciting discovery
of some 18th century

cobblestones has thrown up
several tonnes of heavy rubble.

Stephan's putting his faith in
this rusty old digger.

So this monster has been
standing here I think for about

ten years.

See if we can start it up.

Dick: Good luck with that.

♪ ♪

Dick: First, Stephan checks the
battery.

Stephan: Why doesn't this want
to start?

Come on.

♪ ♪

Dick: It looks like it's dead.

A crude way of testing it is to
short-circuit the battery.

If the battery sparks, then
there's some charge,

but it's not recommended.

- Stephan: Aha.
- Dick: Bingo.

This antiquated French digger
might actually start.

- [vehicle revving]
- Utter madness.

[vehicle revving]

- [vehicle revving]
- [engine starts up]

Dick: Unbelievably, the engine
seem is to be ticking over fine.

Now, there's just the small
matter of learning how to drive

it.

Meanwhile, upstairs, designer
Nicole's in her element,

examining some of the chateau's
old wallpaper.

Wow, that is so satisfying.

[chuckles]

There's like five or six layers
of wallpaper here.

♪ ♪

Dick: She's looking for
inspiration for the tearoom

décor.

Isn't that amazing?

What amazing colours.

I mean, it's so bright.

♪ ♪

Nicole: Wow.

I can't get over how stunning
this is.

Dick: This could be the
chateau's original wallpaper

dating back to 1780.

You know, it might be nice,
to use it downstairs in the

tearoom.

♪ ♪

Dick: Back down in the gardens,
it's crunch time for Stephan.

He's managed to get this old
beast to the chateau, but can he

make it lift.

Stephan: What could happen now
is that the hydraulic cable snap

because of the weight.

♪ ♪

Dick: Bingo!

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Dick: So thanks to this amazing
find, the rubble is soon swiftly

moved.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

So you see what you can find at
a castle, huh?

[groans]

[birds chirping]

Dick: Inside, Nicole's keen to
share her wallpaper discovery

and sell Stephan on her plan to
bring it back to life in the

tearoom.

Stephan: Oh my goodness.

It's busy, huh?

It's very busy.

Nicole: What we'll do is copy
that--

Yeah?

--and have it made into a new
wallpaper.

OK.

Nicole: We've just revealed
those orange cobblestones--

Stephan: Yeah, yeah, and this
will go very nicely together,

yeah.

Nicole: You walk in, it'll be
brilliant, yeah?

Stephan: Yeah, yeah, I see what
you mean.

Very special--

It's really nice, don't you
think?

Stephan: This is fantastic.

It's a great discovery.

♪ ♪

Dick: Back down in Languedoc in
the south of France...

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

Dick:..Paul and Alison are
desperate to give up their

contract work and make a
full-time living from their

chateau by hosting more
weddings.

Before they can open their doors
this summer, Paul needs to fix

the leaking swimming pool and
subsiding terrace pronto.

♪ ♪

Dick: With his wife in
Australia, he's busy planning

the repairs in his workshop.

This is the workshop, and it
used to be the water tank for

the chateau.

And when the water mains were
laid, we thought wouldn't it be

a great idea to turn this into a
workshop?

♪ ♪

Dick: Perfect for all the
renovations and work around the

chateau, like fixing the
swimming pool.

In previous summers, they've
turned the pool area into a

wedding venue with a marquee
overlooking the valley.

But in his man cave, Paul has
another project he'd rather get

on with.

We found this when we bought the
chateau.

It was hidden away in the
basement, and it's a Solex,

a very traditional French
bicycle that they stuck a

petrol engine on the top of.

So, this petrol engine's got a
little rubber wheel, and it

turns the front wheel, and you
start the engine, and you push

it forward.

It connects to the front wheel.

You zoom along, and you can get
a good 20 kilometres an hour out

of it.

So, that'll be great if I can
get that going.

Yeah, perfect for popping into
town and getting a baguette in

the morning.

♪ ♪

Dick: Not sure Alison will be
happy to come home and found you

spent your time fiddling with
that bike.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Dick: At the opposite end of the
country, back at Tim and

Margreeth's B&B in northern
France, the summer season may

already be underway, but they
need to find ways to bring in

more cash.

The plan:

A caravan park.

But they have another idea too,
starting a co-ownership scheme

on their holiday gîtes.

Basically, it's costing them
25,000 euros, which is a one-off

payment, and that gives you--for
25 years, that gives you five

weeks.

So someone will have five weeks
of the year, which is a sort of

rotation thing, a little bit
like a timeshare.

And you can do whatever you like
with it.

You can rent it out or whatever.

♪ ♪

Dick: But there's a spanner in
the works.

They can't lease the gîtes,
unless they fix a problem:

A bee colony in one of the
chimneys.

It's when you need someone like
Dick Strawbridge.

I mean, he'd understand
something like this.

Dick: Sadly, those bees have to
go.

Otherwise, no one will want to
stay there.

[bees buzzing]

They're in a chimney.

It's in a family gîte, so
there'll be people going in and

out of it, and so I have to deal
with this.

It breaks my heart, but
unfortunately, there's no way of

getting rid of them without
actually having to kill them,

so on with the
beekeeping outfit.

I don't actually have a
beekeeping outfit, so I'm gonna

improvise and make one.

Dick: In this case, using a tree
surgeon's helmet, bin bags, and

plenty of gaffer tape.

♪ ♪

So what we're doing here is
we're sealing up this bit here

to stop bees getting in.

Make it as big as possible, so
that gives me a bit of

protection.

♪ ♪

Tim: Good.

How much does a beekeeping
outfit cost?

You got any idea?

Probably about 10 euros or
something.

Margreeth: It's worth--

Tim: Pretty cheap than a roll of
gaffer tape.

Dick: You can get one online for
around £20.

OK, you've never looked better.

- Tim: I never has.
- Well done.

♪ ♪

Dick: Ridiculous outfit?

Check.

Equipment?

Check.

Man walking towards certain
death?

Let's hope not.

- OK, good luck.
- Tim: Thank you.

♪ ♪

Tim: I don't feel very safe
doing this, I have to admit.

Dick: Bee careful, Tim.

Sorry.

Sorry about that.

♪ ♪

He normally comes down whole, so
let's just trust that that will

happen again this time.

[birds chirping]

[bees buzzing]

Tim: The little bees are very,
very busy.

The good--good thing about that
is I can see where they're going

in and out.

They should be fairly easy to
close.

♪ ♪

Dick: Like his suit, Tim's plan
is a bit slapdash.

First, he tries to get the bees
out with insect spray.

Tim: OK, here goes nothing.

[bees buzz]

Tim: There they go.

Look at that, they're swarming.

Dick: Next, he tries to block up
all the gaps.

Tim: There are a lot more bees
than I thought there were.

Be careful, Tim.

Hold on.

♪ ♪

Tim: Oh, there we go.

There's a big hole there.

So, I'm just gonna fill this
hole up.

There's a really great big front
door around the other side that

I can't get to.

Dick: Unbelievably, it seems his
ridiculous beekeeping suit is

working.

Tim: The good news is they seem
to be going for the foam rather

than me.

I'll be glad when it's over.

It's scary seeing him up there.

Tim: I'm done the job because I
can see that the bees can't get

in or out.

♪ ♪

Tim: Oh, man, it's nice to get
out of that.

- Margreeth: Well done.
- Thank you [chuckles].

♪ ♪

Tim: Just have to wait and see
what happens with the bees

and--

Margreeth: Yeah, just give it a
couple of days.

It's done.

- It's chateau life, isn't it?
- Well done.

♪ ♪

Dick: Getting rid of these bees
is vital.

Leasing out the gîtes means a
cash injection of 25,000 euros.

But for now, Tim and Margreeth
have other things on their

mind--

♪ ♪

Tim: Lots of people coming in.

It's a full chateau.

And these are the last-minute
preps before people turn up.

Dick:--preparing for the arrival
of 30 guests tomorrow.

Tim: Panicking.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Dick: Back down in the Languedoc
in the south of France, Paul's

finally got around to trying to
repair the swimming pool.

♪ ♪

Dick: It's a visual focus for
their weddings which are crucial

to increase their profits.

- [Champers growls]
- Paul: Champers, no!

- [Champers growls]
- [Paul chuckles]

Dick: With the help of his
friend Grant, he's hoping to

find out why the pool is losing
water and make the decking safe

for guests.

Paul: So what we do, I think,
Grant, is take the wooden

flooring off, dig down, have a
look, fix the repair, fill it

up, check it's all working, and
then job done.

OK.

Paul: If we get a push on, we'll
be done today.

- Grant: Optimistic.
- [both chuckle]

♪ ♪

Dick: Paul's wife Alison is away
working--

Grant: And we sort of need to
know which end is which.

Paul: Yeah, I'll write it all on
the right-hand end.

Dick:--and wants it sorted
before she gets back.

Paul: We've got a real problem.

We've really got to find out
what's happened and why it's

leaking; otherwise, we could
have a disaster like this when

we've got customers here in
the summer.

The outer edge of reinforced
concrete, that has also managed

to sink down.

- How deep are they?
- Paul: Half a metre.

We just have to carry on taking
these things off, right?

♪ ♪

Dick: It's taken the best part
of ten years to turn the terrace

into a fantasy wedding venue,
and just over six hours for Paul

and Grant to turn it into a
building site.

[drilling]

There's nothing you can't solve
with a sledgehammer, eh?

Dick: Paul's convinced the leak
is coming from a pipe that

connects the pool to the pump,
but that's buried under 18

inches of clay.

Paul: Get the dog, shouldn't we?

They're good at helping digging.

♪ ♪

I don't see any obvious.

I'll put the pool pump on,
create more pressure in that

circuit, and we can see if it's
dripping out then.

Dick: It's possible that by
increasing the pressure in the

pump, water will be forced out
of the leak revealing where it

is.

Paul: What do you think?

- Is it leaking?
- Grant: Not yet.

Paul: It's as dry as a bone.

Dick: But running the pump has
revealed why the pool level has

been falling.

There isn't a leak after all.

Some equipment in the pool house
was draining a bit of water out

of the pool when we didn't
notice.

Dick: Now they can get on with
fixing the dangerous subsiding

decking.

And Paul has a solution for
that.

We have lots of wood we've used
in other projects, so we're

using some oak and Douglas pine.

Wood that's not gonna rot.

♪ ♪

Grant: Going straight?

Paul: Yeah, that's pretty good,
isn't it?

It's good as new.

♪ ♪

Dick: So that's the edging done.

Just another 75 boards to put
back.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

♪ ♪

Dick: Back north in the
Pas-de-Calais, at Nicole and

Stephan's dream chateau, they're
turning their attention to their

crumbling tower--the only
surviving, just about, feature

of the 18th century
fortifications.

They aren't yet sure what
they're going do with it,

but it urgently needs
to be made safe.

Stephan: See, that's actually
the entire roof that's collapsed

on this floor.

You see the rafters of the roof
lying there and all the bricks.

Dick: All that fallen debris,
plus years of weed, need to be

cleared off the internal beams
so Stephan can make the tower

more stable.

[chainsaw revving]

Dick: As they work down the
tower, more problems crop up.

Some of the wooden joists are
rotten and need to be removed.

I'd like to keep this one
intact.

And as soon as possible, replace
the holes with new ones.

♪ ♪

Dick: After four-hours' graft,
Stephan's still got a lot to do

just to make this thing safe,
but designer Nicole is way ahead

of him.

Yeah.

Maybe we just make this like a
little extra space?

Maybe we have a rectangular
table in here.

So when are we going to aim to
do this by?

We have to do this by August as
well, do we?

We can have like a really lovely
old chandelier hanging down

there.

We've got--can you get electrics
to here?

- I am speechless.
- [chuckles]

Nicole: Can you do it with a
glass roof?

- [Stephan chuckles]
- Nicole: So we can--

Absolutely [bleep].

Yes, we will do that,
definitely.

It's done.

Just come back in August; it'll
be finished.

[laughing] I'm actually being
serious.

- It would look amazing.
- I'm very serious actually.

It would look amazing, but I
think there's no way that that's

ever going to happen.

[Nicole chuckles]

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

Dick: When it comes to interior
design, I get the impression

Nicole doesn't joke.

Back inside, she's been work on
replicating the 18th century

wallpaper to use in the tearoom.

♪ ♪

What we've decided to do is to
see if we can create our own

version of this wallpaper.

♪ ♪

Nicole: So, what would be nice
is to have some areas more faded

than others so that it looks
perhaps like it's been there for

a very long time.

♪ ♪

Dick: With a bespoke wallpaper
design complete with aged

effect, it's at least one job
less.

Nicole: You've done it there.

That's better.

Dick: But they only have three
months to get the tearoom ready

for the summer season, and the
floor is currently an unseemly

mix of unfinished concrete and
replica tiles.

This needs replacing and could
take weeks.

To save time, Stephan's come up
with a shortcut: installing a

modern resin flooring.

Stephan: This is the idea I
would like to achieve over here

in the castle.

We just put a nice coat of resin
over the existing concrete.

It's easy to install; it's
quickly done.

It just dries and it's finished.

♪ ♪

Dick: Typically found in
airports and hospitals, I have

to say it's a bold choice for an
18th century castle.

Stephan: I think it's just gonna
look brilliant because it's

gonna be so modern in such an
old place.

♪ ♪

Nicole: Come on in, David.

Dick: This morning they're
meeting David--a resin flooring

specialist from London.

You've got quite a task on your
hands, haven't you?

Nicole: We talked about having a
resin floor.

Ah, so it's been designed to
replace vinyl, if you like.

So, it's like a liquid vinyl.

It has flexibility to it.

Dick: The aim is to create a
seamless floor throughout the

tearoom.

They just need to decide on the
colour.

Nicole: That colour works really
nicely.

It looks like it's perfect.

I think it looks fab, all of
that together.

They do look good.

And that's quite a find, isn't
it, really?

Such a find.

[birds chirping]

Dick: David leaves with
instructions for Nicole and

Stephan to check if there is
solid concrete beneath the old

tiles, as resin flooring must be
laid on a dry, solid base.

- Nicole: It's just earth.
- Stephan: Very peculiar.

♪ ♪

Dick: It's bad news.

With no concrete base, their
plan for the tearoom floor is in

tatters.

The thing is that in order to
put the resin floor down, it has

to be free of moisture below it.

Otherwise, it can bubble.

What we've discovered is all
this kind of clay-like

substance, sand, that's got a
very high-moisture content.

It's kind of a nightmare.

Dick: It's a blow to their hopes
of opening the tearoom on time

and starting to bring in some
much-needed cash.

[birds chirping]

♪ ♪

Dick: Down in the south of
France, things are looking much

brighter for Paul.

The swimming pool and decking
are all fixed.

He can now return to the love of
his life.

[rattling]

Paul: That shouldn't be
rattling.

Dick: He found it in the chateau
when he first moved in.

It's an S2200, so it'll be
interesting to see what year

that's from.

Crikey, it's from 1961.

So, it'll be great if I can get
that going.

♪ ♪

Dick: My guess is the warranty
has expired, but Paul's eager to

try and get it running again and
tour the French countryside at a

heady 20 kilometres per hour.

Paul: No weights on it.

There's no spark or there's no
petrol.

Dick: He's a novice at swimming
pool maintenance, but he's got

years of experience with
engines.

Paul: My next-door neighbour,
his dad ran a garage.

I used to play around and tinker
with motorbikes and cars.

Let's try.

Dick: Paul hasn't seen his wife
Alison for three weeks.

Paul: I'm going to get it going
now.

Dick: She's been working in
Australia, earning money to help

cover the chateau's running
costs, and today she's come

home.

Alison [shouting]: Paul?

Paul?

Paul?

Where is he?

♪ ♪

Dick: It looks to me like he's
off to get some baguettes.

♪ ♪

[engine rumbling]

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Dick: Next time:

There are shocks in store at
Paul and Alison's as they

renovate their dungeon.

Man 1: Think about it.

Man 2: Oh yeah, we'll think
about it, yeah.

Dick: Tim and Margreeth may have
bitten off more than they can

chew with a full chateau of
guests.

We've got 14 people coming in to
have 28 fried eggs.

Panicking.

♪ ♪

Dick: And Angel has a surprise
for Nicole.

Ta-da.

There you go.

You have been knighted [laughs].

Brilliant!

This is so cool.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪