All language subtitles for Rektor på sengekanten (Danish.Bed.and.Board).1972.Denmark.720p.VOSEn.english

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic Download
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech Download
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek Download
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian Download
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian Download
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish Download
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese Download
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:07,401 --> 00:00:13,271 - HEADMASTER AT THE BEDSIDE - 2 00:01:20,961 --> 00:01:25,876 Good morning! Rise and shine, Brush your teeth, make the bed. 3 00:01:32,401 --> 00:01:36,235 Good morning! Brush your teeth, make the bed. 4 00:01:44,001 --> 00:01:49,997 - Good morning! Brush... - Brush your teeth, make the bed! 5 00:02:27,481 --> 00:02:29,358 Good morn... 6 00:02:50,321 --> 00:02:52,551 I can't! 7 00:02:53,481 --> 00:02:55,073 Come on... 8 00:03:06,001 --> 00:03:08,561 It doesn't want to. 9 00:03:32,361 --> 00:03:34,875 Ebba calling Olga... 10 00:03:50,721 --> 00:03:53,554 You're late, Max, They're here. 11 00:03:53,681 --> 00:03:57,435 What? It's only half past eight. 12 00:03:57,601 --> 00:04:03,119 - It will stand up eventually. It always has. - Yes, it will stand... 13 00:04:03,481 --> 00:04:08,919 Stop it, Max, it's not unusual. It happens to everyone. 14 00:04:09,041 --> 00:04:14,638 It's good that this doesn't happen often with your little tuppendix. 15 00:04:14,761 --> 00:04:16,558 You mean "appendix"? 16 00:04:16,681 --> 00:04:20,754 Not tuppendix, but appendix. It's Latin, meaning "appendage". 17 00:04:20,881 --> 00:04:26,478 Yes, you told me, it contains neither muscles nor bones, and yet ... 18 00:04:27,121 --> 00:04:31,831 ... yet, it's just that. An... appendage! 19 00:04:32,281 --> 00:04:38,151 Is it because of troubles at school? Why are you so nervous about this meeting? 20 00:04:38,281 --> 00:04:41,751 My father's the Chairman of the Board, so he won't go against you, 21 00:04:54,201 --> 00:04:58,991 Olga calling Bertha! The big honcho is heading towards the Headmaster's office. 22 00:05:00,001 --> 00:05:02,071 They're here now! 23 00:05:03,561 --> 00:05:08,555 - It gets worse and worse. - What were you doing at that age, Hansen? 24 00:05:08,681 --> 00:05:12,356 You oiled the blackboard so the schoolmaster couldn't write on it. 25 00:05:12,561 --> 00:05:15,280 - No, I don't remember that! - No, no... I don't remember... 26 00:05:18,681 --> 00:05:23,675 - Good morning, Professor. - Good morning, Mr. Chairman. 27 00:05:27,921 --> 00:05:32,870 Sorry, it's time for English class. "One, two, three. I can hop, I can run ... " 28 00:05:34,321 --> 00:05:37,313 Please sit down, boys... 29 00:05:47,681 --> 00:05:49,194 Max... 30 00:05:50,081 --> 00:05:53,630 Is something on your mind? 31 00:05:54,041 --> 00:05:58,751 I think there's something wrong ... Something wrong with me. 32 00:05:58,921 --> 00:06:03,676 Not at all, Max. Deal with them quickly and leave. 33 00:06:04,001 --> 00:06:05,753 Do you ... 34 00:06:06,521 --> 00:06:10,992 - Do you think I should seek medical attention? - No. 35 00:06:11,401 --> 00:06:17,192 You have no classes after the meeting. Come back here, and we'll have some coffee. 36 00:06:25,641 --> 00:06:29,190 - It's locked. - The time to the half minute. 37 00:06:29,321 --> 00:06:33,951 It's nine o'clock. When my watch says it's nine, then it's nine. 38 00:06:34,081 --> 00:06:37,198 - Punctuality is a virtue in school! - Where is that man? 39 00:06:37,361 --> 00:06:40,990 I don't know, he isn't my son in law! 40 00:06:41,121 --> 00:06:43,032 Kiss my ass, Hansen! 41 00:06:48,161 --> 00:06:49,753 STAY OFF Waxed Floor 42 00:06:56,841 --> 00:07:03,189 I recall that my great-grandfather stuck a a pitchfork in your great-grandfather's belly! 43 00:07:03,321 --> 00:07:06,677 And he hanged your great- grandfather for being a murderer! 44 00:07:06,801 --> 00:07:09,190 He enjoyed killing your family! 45 00:07:15,561 --> 00:07:18,758 Right on time, by your watch! 46 00:07:19,881 --> 00:07:24,318 Calling Bertha... I'm in position outside the window. I repeat... 47 00:07:24,441 --> 00:07:27,114 ... I'm in position. 48 00:07:27,521 --> 00:07:30,877 - Krab! Krab! Krabbesö! - Hey! Hey! Hey! 49 00:07:31,001 --> 00:07:32,878 Non plus ultra ... 50 00:07:33,001 --> 00:07:36,835 They're singing at the table. Mikkelmax is being given the floor. 51 00:07:36,961 --> 00:07:40,158 He looks sick today. Standby... 52 00:07:40,361 --> 00:07:44,593 It will cost about 100,000 kronor. That's nothing these days. 53 00:07:44,721 --> 00:07:51,399 If construction starts soon, it will be ready for the new term. 54 00:07:55,801 --> 00:08:01,671 I must say that the school board is not enthusiastic about the the Headmaster's plan. 55 00:08:01,801 --> 00:08:07,433 It is rash. Bringing girls into Krabbesögård will cause a great upheaval. 56 00:08:07,681 --> 00:08:11,515 Don't misunderstand me. I have nothing against girls in and of themselves. 57 00:08:11,641 --> 00:08:16,112 - We were all young once. - Yes, but it was different then! 58 00:08:16,241 --> 00:08:19,995 - We were younger then! - We respected traditions. 59 00:08:20,121 --> 00:08:23,477 Why should we have girls here? 60 00:08:23,681 --> 00:08:29,153 Our scholars school has fared well without girls for over 100 years. 61 00:08:29,281 --> 00:08:33,115 Our students have other things to think about! 62 00:08:36,881 --> 00:08:40,590 They're as nice as Jytte's, and at least as large. 63 00:08:40,721 --> 00:08:46,079 Imagine caressing her goodies for a few hours. I'd be happy to! 64 00:08:46,361 --> 00:08:49,194 She's almost too good for Mikkelmax. 65 00:08:50,681 --> 00:08:53,149 Olga here. Come in. 66 00:08:55,361 --> 00:08:58,876 - We're getting girls at the school! - Girls? 67 00:08:59,001 --> 00:09:02,198 - Yes, I repeat: Girls! - Girls? 68 00:09:03,201 --> 00:09:05,078 That Mikkelmax is okay! 69 00:09:05,761 --> 00:09:09,879 When the Board appointed me as the school's youngest Headmaster ever I thought ... 70 00:09:10,001 --> 00:09:15,553 ... you wanted a vibrant, modern school. If so, there's only one way forward. 71 00:09:15,681 --> 00:09:17,194 Girls. 72 00:09:17,481 --> 00:09:21,872 A boys' school is an relic that belongs in a museum. 73 00:09:22,001 --> 00:09:26,358 - Show some respect the school's traditions! - Kiss my... 74 00:09:26,521 --> 00:09:31,390 ... traditions! They're good only as long as they are... well... 75 00:09:31,561 --> 00:09:34,712 Gentlemen, you are hopelessly old-fashioned! 76 00:09:34,841 --> 00:09:38,629 Max, be sensible now. Let's talk about something else, ... 77 00:09:38,761 --> 00:09:42,674 ... like the money. The school doesn't have 50,000, much less 100,000. 78 00:09:42,801 --> 00:09:49,240 - He must think money grows on trees! - Not with today's credit crunch. 79 00:09:49,361 --> 00:09:54,355 You can find a new Headmaster unless I get classrooms for girls ... now! 80 00:09:54,521 --> 00:09:58,150 - Sodom and Gomorrah... - It's the worst thing that could... 81 00:09:58,281 --> 00:09:59,873 One at a time! 82 00:10:00,001 --> 00:10:02,071 Who wants the floor? Who wishes to speak? 83 00:10:02,241 --> 00:10:04,471 No, there's nothing more to discuss. 84 00:10:06,841 --> 00:10:08,991 The meeting is adjourned. 85 00:10:24,401 --> 00:10:27,040 Is the meeting over already? 86 00:10:29,601 --> 00:10:32,957 Wonderful! I missed you. 87 00:10:35,401 --> 00:10:40,350 It's going nowhere with those old fogies. 88 00:10:40,561 --> 00:10:44,315 - My father, for example? - No, he's neither for it nor against it. 89 00:10:44,441 --> 00:10:48,832 - Aren't you simply being stubborn? - No! 90 00:10:49,761 --> 00:10:56,314 - Then how do you feel? - As if I want to do violence to someone! 91 00:10:57,361 --> 00:11:00,717 - Would it accomplish anything? - Yes, it would make me feel better! 92 00:11:03,001 --> 00:11:05,834 Then beat me, darling. 93 00:11:08,001 --> 00:11:10,834 But, Line! No, Line... 94 00:11:11,561 --> 00:11:14,314 Go ahead, if it will help... 95 00:11:14,521 --> 00:11:18,150 No way, darling. 96 00:11:20,441 --> 00:11:22,830 Then I have another idea. Come... 97 00:11:28,681 --> 00:11:31,479 Off with the jacket... 98 00:11:31,841 --> 00:11:37,074 - I can get the 100,000 myself! - ... then your buttons. 99 00:11:39,641 --> 00:11:42,997 Shall we have coffee first? 100 00:11:44,121 --> 00:11:46,874 - First? - Did I sit too hard on you? 101 00:11:47,001 --> 00:11:49,799 No, not yet. 102 00:11:51,281 --> 00:11:52,919 - Are you in? - Yes! 103 00:11:56,881 --> 00:11:59,679 - Is something wrong? - No, only... 104 00:11:59,801 --> 00:12:01,678 Hello... hello... hello! 105 00:12:02,521 --> 00:12:05,194 - Don't worry about her. - Don't be so stubborn, Max. 106 00:12:05,321 --> 00:12:07,357 - I'm not being stubborn. - Yes! -No! 107 00:12:07,481 --> 00:12:12,839 - No, only when you don't get your way. - Can I borrow 100,000 from you? 108 00:12:12,961 --> 00:12:17,751 - Not from me. I'm just a farmer. - Line, your father is here! 109 00:12:17,881 --> 00:12:20,600 I'm leaving. But I calmed them down. 110 00:12:20,761 --> 00:12:25,551 You shouldn't scold the old fogies. They agreed to let you to raise the 100,000. 111 00:12:25,721 --> 00:12:28,189 - How about a little coffee? - No, thanks. 112 00:12:29,121 --> 00:12:33,255 It's said that too much coffee kills one's sex drive. 113 00:12:36,241 --> 00:12:43,272 - You only think about school! - I'd like to, Line, if I just could... 114 00:12:44,841 --> 00:12:49,471 - Do you want some coffee? - No, too much coffee kills... 115 00:12:50,441 --> 00:12:53,638 Can we go for a walk, instead? 116 00:12:53,841 --> 00:12:59,837 We can try... Do you remember the tree stump in the enchanted forest, the one with the moss? 117 00:13:00,001 --> 00:13:02,356 We didn't have any problem there. 118 00:13:19,721 --> 00:13:27,057 - No, I can't... - The old oak is still standing over there. 119 00:13:58,601 --> 00:14:02,640 After all the trouble climbing up here... 120 00:14:11,281 --> 00:14:15,194 No, Line! The cold water, you know... 121 00:14:15,321 --> 00:14:18,119 Come on, Max, We can try anyway! 122 00:14:18,321 --> 00:14:22,394 - No, Line... - What is this all about? 123 00:14:23,321 --> 00:14:24,834 I... 124 00:14:27,201 --> 00:14:28,953 Dr. Petersen... 125 00:14:30,961 --> 00:14:32,997 What? 126 00:14:33,201 --> 00:14:35,431 Without my underwear? 127 00:14:36,161 --> 00:14:40,074 Is that really necessary, Dr. Petersen? 128 00:14:40,601 --> 00:14:46,517 I'm not going to rape you, Mikkelsen. I only have so much time, and ... 129 00:14:46,641 --> 00:14:48,438 ... it will amuse me. 130 00:14:54,241 --> 00:14:56,801 - Is there something wrong? - Yes. 131 00:14:56,921 --> 00:15:00,152 Is there anyone who can help? 132 00:15:01,201 --> 00:15:04,477 Yes... a watchmaker! 133 00:15:11,361 --> 00:15:15,912 - Is this the member in question? - Yes. 134 00:15:18,921 --> 00:15:21,799 It looks okay. 135 00:15:22,761 --> 00:15:26,959 How long has it been since it was functioning? 136 00:15:28,441 --> 00:15:30,875 A week or so... 137 00:15:33,041 --> 00:15:35,760 Well, little things have their uses, too. 138 00:15:35,881 --> 00:15:39,840 You can get dressed now. I've seen enough. 139 00:15:50,281 --> 00:15:55,639 Nothing wrong with the equipment. It's probably just nerves. 140 00:15:55,761 --> 00:16:00,903 There's nothing wrong with my nervous system. That's fine in every respect. 141 00:16:01,053 --> 00:16:06,498 Oh yeah? Are you forgetting that little business about it not that working so well? 142 00:16:06,721 --> 00:16:10,077 - Or rather, not all. - Yes. 143 00:16:10,841 --> 00:16:14,675 When did you last see your wife naked? 144 00:16:15,521 --> 00:16:20,800 - What does that have to do with it? - Headmaster Mikkelsen ... 145 00:16:22,121 --> 00:16:27,718 ... which do you think is more erotically arousing: a stark naked woman, ... 146 00:16:27,841 --> 00:16:31,436 ... or one who is clothed? 147 00:16:34,601 --> 00:16:38,480 - Don't get personal, now ... - I don't know. 148 00:16:39,561 --> 00:16:43,713 Then I'd like to show you something interesting. 149 00:16:57,641 --> 00:17:00,917 - You've probably seen striptease before? - Yes. 150 00:17:01,041 --> 00:17:03,760 This is a little different. 151 00:18:52,161 --> 00:18:55,756 - Now you see why I asked? - Yes. 152 00:19:05,761 --> 00:19:11,119 - Aren't you going to dance, Erik? - I'm excused from physical exercise - my leg. 153 00:19:15,081 --> 00:19:21,156 - Excused? Your sister's the Headmaster's wife! - I don't hold discussions at that level. 154 00:19:21,281 --> 00:19:27,754 - When we have girls here, you'll be healthy! - If we get them! They're expensive - 100,000! 155 00:19:27,881 --> 00:19:32,909 For 100 years the Mazurka has been a tradition here. It's a beautiful dance, ... 156 00:19:33,041 --> 00:19:36,636 ... a chivalric dance, a tribute to women. 157 00:19:42,241 --> 00:19:47,793 Mazurka... they need to learn how to raise 100,000 in a hurry. 158 00:19:52,721 --> 00:19:56,430 Barneweller! The record player! 159 00:20:02,521 --> 00:20:05,274 I just noticed... it needed winding. 160 00:20:19,721 --> 00:20:22,281 Yes, come in! 161 00:20:31,601 --> 00:20:34,240 The Headmaster asked me to stop by ... 162 00:20:34,361 --> 00:20:39,754 He's not at home. He just wanted you to take his... 163 00:20:40,281 --> 00:20:42,351 Take his... 164 00:20:42,961 --> 00:20:46,033 ... his botany class tomorrow. 165 00:20:46,401 --> 00:20:49,438 His... in 2B, yes! 166 00:20:49,561 --> 00:20:53,679 - I'm home! - It's just me, Headmaster. I... 167 00:20:53,801 --> 00:20:56,520 Your wife asked me to take your ... 168 00:20:56,681 --> 00:20:59,718 ... your wife ... lying in bed ... 169 00:21:01,401 --> 00:21:03,198 ... as you can see. 170 00:21:05,361 --> 00:21:08,194 2B... tomorrow. 171 00:21:09,681 --> 00:21:11,558 Botany. 172 00:21:12,561 --> 00:21:14,950 You're back already? 173 00:21:15,121 --> 00:21:17,351 What did the doctor say? 174 00:21:17,481 --> 00:21:20,439 That you're to get dressed. 175 00:21:23,161 --> 00:21:24,310 What? 176 00:21:27,201 --> 00:21:30,671 - It goes like that. - That's right! 177 00:21:30,881 --> 00:21:32,712 Headmaster? 178 00:21:33,001 --> 00:21:38,473 - Does Barneweller have something to say? - For every problem there's a solution. 179 00:21:38,641 --> 00:21:43,317 - For every mathematical problem, yes. - No, we meant the Headmaster's problem. 180 00:21:44,161 --> 00:21:46,117 My problem? 181 00:21:46,641 --> 00:21:51,078 - What do you know about it? - We think you're going about it the wrong way. 182 00:21:52,001 --> 00:21:56,313 - Isn't that a little personal? - We have a particular interest in the matter. 183 00:21:56,441 --> 00:22:00,116 - What interest is that? - If the school is going to be co-educational. 184 00:22:00,241 --> 00:22:01,980 - Girls in the school! - We have room for them! 185 00:22:02,080 --> 00:22:07,256 - We've done the calculations. - No... girls? You know what that will cost? 186 00:22:07,356 --> 00:22:12,297 - Yes, we've considered the economics. - We can come up with the money! 187 00:22:12,321 --> 00:22:15,836 - With jobs over the summer break. - Bring out the model! 188 00:22:24,081 --> 00:22:26,231 What have you cooked up now? 189 00:22:26,361 --> 00:22:30,274 Do you know what this would cost? Although, I suppose you do. 190 00:22:30,401 --> 00:22:32,869 What's 100,000 these days? 191 00:22:33,761 --> 00:22:38,391 - Very handsome, I must say. - The girls will stay in the pensioners' wing. 192 00:22:38,521 --> 00:22:41,160 And here is the key... 193 00:22:41,481 --> 00:22:45,156 "Hotel Mazurka"? What does this mean? 194 00:22:45,281 --> 00:22:50,116 - People are wild about staying at a castle. - Advertise it as "A Chateau guesthouse"... 195 00:22:50,241 --> 00:22:54,154 -... "in a beautiful setting." People will pour in! - Leaving cash when they check out! 196 00:22:54,281 --> 00:22:57,398 - We'll manage it ourselves. - We have many more ideas. 197 00:22:59,161 --> 00:23:02,233 No, it just won't do. 198 00:23:02,401 --> 00:23:06,633 Well done, boys, but it really won't do. 199 00:23:34,044 --> 00:23:38,959 - Carry these bags to room 112, please. - No, I'm excused from physical exercise. 200 00:23:39,081 --> 00:23:41,549 This was your idea! 201 00:23:50,841 --> 00:23:52,832 32,500... 202 00:23:53,121 --> 00:23:56,431 That puts us approximately here... 203 00:23:59,321 --> 00:24:02,870 - It's... - No, it's not. 204 00:24:03,041 --> 00:24:04,838 No, not at all. 205 00:24:09,721 --> 00:24:16,797 - Someone has certainly shot a lot of parrots. - Not parrots, Herbert. Deer! 206 00:24:21,561 --> 00:24:26,351 - Shouldn't the beds be pushed together? - A space between them can also be nice. 207 00:24:26,761 --> 00:24:28,991 A space between...! 208 00:24:30,601 --> 00:24:34,071 - No, I'm in a hurry! - Okay, I'll be quick! 209 00:24:34,481 --> 00:24:36,437 Someone's coming! 210 00:24:40,521 --> 00:24:45,549 - I hope the room is suitable, Director. - As long as it suits the Director's wife. 211 00:24:45,681 --> 00:24:48,912 - The Director's wife? - That's you, darling! 212 00:24:49,041 --> 00:24:53,124 - I was just smoothing down the bed for you. - Thank you, we don't want to be disturbed now. 213 00:24:56,321 --> 00:24:57,720 Goodbye... 214 00:25:00,441 --> 00:25:02,397 DOING HOMEWORK 215 00:25:14,721 --> 00:25:20,398 Søren and Erik, clean the large room in the east tower. We don't have enough double beds. 216 00:25:20,521 --> 00:25:24,400 Then bring up the large poster bed from the basement. 217 00:25:24,561 --> 00:25:29,555 - That old thing? From Christian IV's time? - Do it! We'll say that he slept in it, ... 218 00:25:29,681 --> 00:25:31,637 ... and charge an extra 20 kronor! 219 00:25:43,201 --> 00:25:46,830 - Have you been down in the basement before? - No. 220 00:26:02,681 --> 00:26:06,435 Is it true that the place is haunted? 221 00:26:06,601 --> 00:26:07,920 Haunted... ? 222 00:26:08,041 --> 00:26:12,512 I'm crazy about ghosts. It was in the ad. 223 00:26:16,481 --> 00:26:19,473 Who writes these ads? 224 00:26:25,601 --> 00:26:31,312 You have to hand it to them... they were right. I take my hat off to the young people. 225 00:26:31,441 --> 00:26:33,955 The boys must be totally girl-crazy! 226 00:26:34,081 --> 00:26:37,835 - Sodom and Gomorrah... - That's enough, Hansen. 227 00:26:52,481 --> 00:26:57,794 - That Mikkelmax is a good man. - You should call him Headmaster Mikkelsen. 228 00:26:57,921 --> 00:27:01,596 Later, when you're an old man in the schoolyard like me, you can call him "Mikkelmax". 229 00:27:01,721 --> 00:27:06,556 Here's the bed. It's too heavy. We'll take another. 230 00:27:10,681 --> 00:27:13,832 How did you get such a young headmaster? 231 00:27:14,161 --> 00:27:17,756 - It was the former headmaster's wife. - That doesn't make any sense! 232 00:27:17,881 --> 00:27:22,909 - There's the one we want. The narrow one. - Come on, tell me what happened. 233 00:27:24,841 --> 00:27:30,393 He was an ordinary teacher. We liked him, we trusted him. 234 00:27:30,561 --> 00:27:34,679 Unfortunately, he had to be married, for moral reasons. 235 00:27:34,841 --> 00:27:38,197 We found a bride for him, but he ran off, just like that! 236 00:27:38,361 --> 00:27:43,560 At the annual ball, Headmaster Bostedt's wife dragged him off to bed with her! 237 00:27:43,681 --> 00:27:46,912 Maybe the Mazurka went to their heads! 238 00:27:47,081 --> 00:27:52,792 The next day Mikkelmax was deemed qualified, appointed Headmaster, and married my sister. 239 00:27:53,241 --> 00:27:57,234 - The Head Witch is here! - Who? Mrs. Bostedt? 240 00:28:13,601 --> 00:28:17,958 - Did the old headmaster ever find out? - He was oblivious. 241 00:28:18,081 --> 00:28:20,436 That year he became Minister of Culture. 242 00:28:20,601 --> 00:28:24,913 - Welcome to Krubbesögård. - Or the Hotel Mazurka? 243 00:28:25,041 --> 00:28:29,159 Good afternoon, Mr. Burneweller. Do you have room for an old Headmaster's wife? 244 00:28:29,281 --> 00:28:32,671 Madam Minister of Culture, you look younger and more beautiful than ever. 245 00:28:32,801 --> 00:28:35,474 Your usual flattery, "De Fontenay". 246 00:28:35,641 --> 00:28:37,874 - Here's Hansen ... - Mr. Hansen! 247 00:28:37,874 --> 00:28:40,151 - Good day. - Good day, Mr. Hansen. 248 00:28:41,081 --> 00:28:45,359 And here's my dear, unfortunate successor. Good day. 249 00:28:45,481 --> 00:28:49,083 How is your husband? Hearty and happy, I hope? 250 00:28:49,083 --> 00:28:50,531 Yes, thank you. 251 00:28:50,631 --> 00:28:54,596 Being Headmaster here can be a little stressful ... 252 00:29:04,921 --> 00:29:09,358 - Good day, Mrs. Bostedt. - Good day, Headmaster Mikkelsen. 253 00:29:09,561 --> 00:29:13,713 - Did I frighten you? - It's been a long time since we ... 254 00:29:14,441 --> 00:29:18,150 ... since I had the pleasure... 255 00:29:18,881 --> 00:29:23,193 Criminals always return to the scene of the crime! 256 00:29:23,761 --> 00:29:27,595 How is Headmaster Bostedt ... Minister of Culture? 257 00:29:27,761 --> 00:29:31,436 He's preparing himself. He's always preparing himself. 258 00:29:31,561 --> 00:29:38,160 - But he's hearty and happy? - Hearty? Of course, he's always hearty. 259 00:29:40,161 --> 00:29:42,914 Bertha calling winch operator... 260 00:29:56,761 --> 00:29:59,798 Niller, give me a hand here! 261 00:30:00,321 --> 00:30:01,674 Help! 262 00:30:01,801 --> 00:30:04,110 Get me down! 263 00:30:04,281 --> 00:30:06,795 Get me down, please! 264 00:30:06,961 --> 00:30:09,156 Help! Help! 265 00:30:30,361 --> 00:30:34,240 - I'll get you down right away! - There's no rush. 266 00:30:46,161 --> 00:30:48,356 - Shouldn't you have brought the whole squad? - Yeah... 267 00:30:49,081 --> 00:30:54,109 - Why do you think she's here? - Mrs Bostedt? How should I know? 268 00:30:54,241 --> 00:30:58,598 - This is our chance! Go after her. - What do you mean? 269 00:30:58,721 --> 00:31:01,679 You should be especially nice to her. 270 00:31:01,801 --> 00:31:07,512 - Why should I do that? - Not just friendly, but very friendly... 271 00:31:08,241 --> 00:31:11,153 Who else is staying here? 272 00:31:11,561 --> 00:31:14,598 No one I know, it would seem. 273 00:31:15,801 --> 00:31:21,034 - It's still a long way, Headmaster Mikkelsen. - Yes, but we're nearly halfway there. 274 00:31:21,161 --> 00:31:27,919 Given the short time remaining, there's a good chance you will fail. 275 00:31:28,041 --> 00:31:30,811 Max Mikkelsen usually gets what he wants. 276 00:31:32,172 --> 00:31:34,282 Yes... so we're opening an antique shop. 277 00:31:34,382 --> 00:31:38,247 The School Board has agreed to let us sell the old stuff in the basement. 278 00:31:38,347 --> 00:31:44,373 - Copenhageners love that old junk. - I thought it would be kind of ... 279 00:31:44,401 --> 00:31:48,633 - ... of Mrs. Bostedt, if you wouldn't mind. - I'd be happy to. 280 00:32:04,001 --> 00:32:08,438 Why, we've found lots of interesting odd things. 281 00:32:09,641 --> 00:32:13,475 For example ... A chamber pot. 282 00:32:14,201 --> 00:32:17,876 - The necessary jug! - When? Now? 283 00:32:18,161 --> 00:32:22,791 - Sorry... I get it. - Madam has an eye for quality. 284 00:32:24,401 --> 00:32:31,432 Much stems from the time when Otto Krabbe-Krabbesø lived here. 285 00:32:31,601 --> 00:32:35,514 This is one of the more intriguing... 286 00:32:37,521 --> 00:32:40,274 Something from an old stove...? 287 00:32:40,441 --> 00:32:43,797 Or a rubber corset, perhaps? 288 00:32:43,961 --> 00:32:48,398 - No, it's a chastity belt. - A chastity belt? 289 00:32:48,921 --> 00:32:54,359 When knights went off to war, they often feared their wives would be unfaithful. 290 00:32:54,481 --> 00:33:00,795 So they put one of those on, and were confident that she was unavailable ... locked. 291 00:33:01,601 --> 00:33:04,513 It's a horrible object. Remove your finger, Hansen! 292 00:33:04,641 --> 00:33:10,432 - I can't, it hurts, - It's the little one, you have nine others. 293 00:33:11,361 --> 00:33:16,674 It's odd that something like that became unfashionable. It would still be useful today. 294 00:33:16,801 --> 00:33:20,024 Today's women are hot to jump in the sack. 295 00:33:20,024 --> 00:33:22,824 - Excuse me, Mrs. Bosted! - That's alright... 296 00:33:28,961 --> 00:33:33,079 Grains of Paradise, Field Bindweed, Castoreum... 297 00:33:33,321 --> 00:33:39,237 - We're in a hurry. What do you have there? - "Cyprianus," what is it? 298 00:33:39,361 --> 00:33:44,435 Cyprianus is a book of witchcraft. "Atus, Satus..." 299 00:33:44,561 --> 00:33:48,110 - It sounds scary. - They're spells. Are you superstitious? 300 00:33:48,241 --> 00:33:53,235 - No! - Recipes for potions and the like. 301 00:33:53,921 --> 00:33:58,949 It isn't make believe. It's been proven that they stil work to this day! 302 00:33:59,961 --> 00:34:02,873 Here we have the ingredients! 303 00:34:03,321 --> 00:34:08,395 Angelica root... Asafetida resin... 304 00:34:09,201 --> 00:34:12,989 Erik, shouldn't we be going upstairs? They'll be missing us by now. 305 00:34:13,121 --> 00:34:17,239 - The guests will ready for their mazurka lesson. - Are you afraid? 306 00:34:17,641 --> 00:34:19,711 - Not me! - Listen... 307 00:34:20,041 --> 00:34:25,752 Love potion: Mix wall paste, wine grapes, and teriaca ... 308 00:34:25,881 --> 00:34:33,640 ... in a glass of milk containing a crushed human tooth. 309 00:34:33,801 --> 00:34:38,238 - It sounds delicious! - We're looking for something else... 310 00:34:38,721 --> 00:34:43,841 Here's a better one! To get the glow of love and joy ... 311 00:34:43,961 --> 00:34:46,521 - The glow of love? - Sexual arousal. 312 00:34:46,641 --> 00:34:51,078 - A little powdered Asafetida resin, ... - Shit? 313 00:34:51,441 --> 00:34:55,798 ... St. John's Wort and dwarf nettle, ... 314 00:34:55,921 --> 00:34:58,958 ... whisked together the whites of bird eggs, ... 315 00:34:59,081 --> 00:35:04,201 ... and a bit of tender sea holly while chanting: "Asus, satus, ... 316 00:35:04,361 --> 00:35:09,276 - "... cussitus, cussatus." - That's sounds exciting. 317 00:35:09,781 --> 00:35:17,213 Of course! Why don't we provide everyone with the glow of love? "Everything for the guests!" 318 00:35:40,281 --> 00:35:42,237 Hi there... 319 00:35:47,321 --> 00:35:50,154 I'll show Mrs. Bostedt to her room. 320 00:35:50,281 --> 00:35:51,953 Line! 321 00:35:52,761 --> 00:35:54,672 Fabian! 322 00:35:56,241 --> 00:36:04,273 - It's your old Fabian! Are you still single? - No, I'm an old married housewife! 323 00:36:04,521 --> 00:36:07,319 - I can take care of myself. - Thank you, Mrs. Bostedt. 324 00:36:07,681 --> 00:36:10,957 - So good to see you! - Good day. 325 00:36:11,501 --> 00:36:13,537 Mix Makkelsen. 326 00:36:13,761 --> 00:36:16,150 This is Fabian. 327 00:36:16,681 --> 00:36:19,195 You betrayed our old ideals, then. 328 00:36:19,321 --> 00:36:23,872 That's Fabian. We were war comrades in my revolutionary past. 329 00:36:24,001 --> 00:36:29,519 The ad read: "Chateau guesthouse for broad-minded people." Just my style ... 330 00:36:29,781 --> 00:36:32,107 Do you have a room with a view toward the inner courtyard? 331 00:36:32,107 --> 00:36:33,980 Yes, room 24. 332 00:36:34,761 --> 00:36:40,438 I'll get out of my driving gear, so we can have a couple of broad-minded drinks later! 333 00:36:40,561 --> 00:36:45,960 I'm looking forward to it. Jytte, show Mr. Fabian to room 24. 334 00:36:57,561 --> 00:36:59,199 No... 335 00:37:05,241 --> 00:37:10,474 - Hello, do you have a room? - Unfortunately, we only have single rooms left. 336 00:37:10,601 --> 00:37:15,436 - But we're just married... newlyweds! - What a shame! 337 00:37:15,601 --> 00:37:21,551 It isn't because you're not married... guests trying to arrange something. 338 00:37:24,801 --> 00:37:28,714 Alright! Then we have something after all. 339 00:37:29,081 --> 00:37:31,879 - Come on, let's go upstairs. - Already? 340 00:37:32,281 --> 00:37:36,399 Jens, show the young couple up to room 18. 341 00:37:40,321 --> 00:37:42,039 Congratulations! 342 00:37:43,801 --> 00:37:46,918 I'm allergic to rice! 343 00:37:47,841 --> 00:37:49,433 Oh... sorry! 344 00:37:50,441 --> 00:37:54,195 - Hans, go ahead. I have to make a call. - Do you have to? 345 00:37:54,321 --> 00:37:56,391 Yes... to mama. 346 00:37:59,281 --> 00:38:03,638 Mazurka is a tradition here at Krabbesögård. 347 00:38:03,841 --> 00:38:09,473 A beautiful dance, a chivalric dance, a tribute to the woman. 348 00:39:06,601 --> 00:39:11,197 The Minister may have sent his wife as a secret observer. 349 00:39:11,321 --> 00:39:17,396 - Otherwise, why did she arrive unannounced? - She put in a call to Copenhagen. 350 00:39:17,521 --> 00:39:20,672 - What did I say? - What did you say, Hansen? 351 00:39:20,801 --> 00:39:25,875 I wash my hands of this. I do. Sodom and Gomorrah. 352 00:39:30,641 --> 00:39:36,796 We can take advantage of Mikkelsen's threat to leave if he doesn't get the money. 353 00:39:36,921 --> 00:39:39,674 There are other possible Headmasters here. 354 00:39:40,801 --> 00:39:43,554 Thank you! Next couples on the floor! 355 00:39:43,721 --> 00:39:49,193 Everyone should have the chance to participate. Remember to pay at the front desk. 356 00:39:49,321 --> 00:39:54,076 - I had no idea that you could mazurku. - I can do anything you want. 357 00:40:04,521 --> 00:40:08,953 You were quite right, Max Mikkelsen. It was a long time ago. 358 00:40:19,201 --> 00:40:21,078 Professor Holst! 359 00:40:25,201 --> 00:40:30,434 On behalf of the School Board, we thank you for your efforts. 360 00:40:30,561 --> 00:40:36,040 It's an honor to help see that the Krubbesös' traditions are maintained. 361 00:40:36,721 --> 00:40:43,633 Some of us believe that your talents should be used in a more important post. 362 00:41:06,001 --> 00:41:09,994 - Are you happy? - With Max? Yes, of course. 363 00:41:10,201 --> 00:41:13,511 It's not very apparent. 364 00:41:15,481 --> 00:41:17,676 But I am happy. 365 00:41:18,961 --> 00:41:20,917 I'm glad. 366 00:41:29,241 --> 00:41:32,358 - Manufacturer Rust... - Wholesale sausage! 367 00:41:32,481 --> 00:41:34,472 - Nürnberg. - Toys! 368 00:41:34,601 --> 00:41:38,706 - Shall we dance? - What? I suppose so... 369 00:41:42,801 --> 00:41:46,191 Look, your husband is dancing with the Culture Minister's wife. 370 00:41:46,321 --> 00:41:50,599 - Do you know Mrs. Bostedt? - Not very well... not at all! 371 00:41:50,761 --> 00:41:54,754 Just from the media. I'm not at all interested in politics. 372 00:41:56,321 --> 00:42:00,155 - Why don't we go to our room now? - There's no hurry! 373 00:42:00,281 --> 00:42:02,556 No, of course not. 374 00:42:04,441 --> 00:42:07,717 - Can you bring me some coffee? - Yeah, sure... if there's any left. 375 00:42:07,841 --> 00:42:12,471 It's the least you can do for one who's the life of the party here! 376 00:42:23,241 --> 00:42:28,774 - Let's we make sure we've left nothing out. - The words... in the formula. 377 00:42:30,921 --> 00:42:35,358 Atus, Satus, Fissetus... 378 00:42:35,761 --> 00:42:38,673 - Cusse! - Cusse? 379 00:42:42,361 --> 00:42:47,230 Atus, Satus, Cussetus ,,, 380 00:42:52,441 --> 00:42:55,751 - Isn't it dangerous? - Rubbish! 381 00:42:55,921 --> 00:42:59,834 What should we put it in? The salt shakers! 382 00:43:12,761 --> 00:43:16,117 What on earth are you guys up to? 383 00:43:21,001 --> 00:43:24,311 - It's just a little salt... - For an egg... yes. 384 00:43:24,441 --> 00:43:29,840 For an ostrich egg? I have enough to do without cleaning up after you. 385 00:43:31,321 --> 00:43:37,669 By the way, have you seen how the Headmaster's wife has been acting around that Fabian? 386 00:43:38,641 --> 00:43:40,871 I bet she wants to... 387 00:43:44,241 --> 00:43:50,840 - Is that for you, Jytte? - No, it's for "Doormat", who's playing the king. 388 00:43:51,281 --> 00:43:55,672 But I think I'll have a cup myself. He'll have to wait, ... 389 00:43:58,241 --> 00:44:00,755 ... until it's all over. 390 00:44:01,641 --> 00:44:07,552 - Take him half a cup. - It's all he deserves. 391 00:44:08,726 --> 00:44:10,455 The pig... 392 00:44:17,641 --> 00:44:23,079 - Won't you have some, too? - It's too strong. We don't drink coffee. 393 00:44:29,521 --> 00:44:34,356 - What are you standing there staring at? - You're a cute little coffee maker. 394 00:44:34,481 --> 00:44:37,120 Get out of here! 395 00:44:54,161 --> 00:44:57,949 No, take it to the "Doormat". It's for the "Doormat"! 396 00:45:06,801 --> 00:45:10,555 Thank you for coming out tonight. We'll continue tomorrow. 397 00:45:10,681 --> 00:45:14,833 Don't forget to report your time, and make payment at the reception desk. 398 00:45:14,961 --> 00:45:19,751 We've done better at the Mazurka, Max. Forgive me for saying it. 399 00:45:19,881 --> 00:45:24,033 You're right. I wasn't very good this evening. 400 00:45:30,001 --> 00:45:33,676 Thank you for tonight, Mrs. Bostedt. I hope I didn't spoil it for you. 401 00:45:33,801 --> 00:45:36,190 You know what I feel like doing? 402 00:45:36,361 --> 00:45:41,037 Taking a walk around the lake. In the moonlight. Have you seen the school ... 403 00:45:41,161 --> 00:45:45,871 ... when it's reflected in the lake? - Yes, it is quite beautiful. 404 00:45:46,601 --> 00:45:52,676 - Damn! They've closed the kitchen! - Don't you think about anything other than food? 405 00:45:52,801 --> 00:45:55,395 All that hopping around made me hungry. 406 00:46:01,561 --> 00:46:03,358 Oh, my scarf... 407 00:46:08,961 --> 00:46:13,273 - Are you finished already, Professor Holst? - Fortunately, yes. 408 00:46:23,481 --> 00:46:27,599 "Some of us believe that your talents ... 409 00:46:32,481 --> 00:46:37,391 "... should be used in a more important post." 410 00:46:55,561 --> 00:47:01,591 You're... so good at mazurka, Professor Holst! 411 00:47:01,761 --> 00:47:06,232 What did say you, little girl? I take it you're interested... 412 00:47:12,201 --> 00:47:14,635 I really want to... 413 00:47:14,761 --> 00:47:19,073 - Right now. - What do you know... 414 00:47:27,521 --> 00:47:30,194 Call me Hugo. 415 00:47:36,641 --> 00:47:40,839 I'm in room 13. Just... come on! 416 00:47:47,601 --> 00:47:51,879 - Stop, Fabian. You're not being very nice. - That's just what I'm trying to be. 417 00:47:52,001 --> 00:47:55,225 Line, we're two old war comrades ... 418 00:47:55,861 --> 00:48:00,239 No... now you can find someone else to go to war with. Good night! 419 00:48:17,561 --> 00:48:21,031 - Uncontrollable mirth. - 3:22 ... 420 00:48:21,201 --> 00:48:25,035 3:23 ... Mild cramps. 421 00:48:34,201 --> 00:48:36,795 After 4:06 ... 422 00:48:37,081 --> 00:48:40,391 -... strong erotic sensations. - Groping! 423 00:48:40,421 --> 00:48:42,670 - 4:15 ... - It's getting filthy! 424 00:48:58,961 --> 00:49:01,714 Leave them be. At... 425 00:49:01,841 --> 00:49:06,596 - ... six on the dot. - At six on the dot... we backed out. 426 00:49:11,681 --> 00:49:14,929 - Isn't it beautiful? - Yeah... 427 00:49:17,801 --> 00:49:21,111 Max! What were you thinking? 428 00:49:22,041 --> 00:49:27,035 Yes... it's just that ... You look so beautiful. 429 00:49:28,961 --> 00:49:33,712 - I guess I'm a little woozy tonight. - What about Fabian? 430 00:49:34,161 --> 00:49:36,550 Fabian? Do you know him? 431 00:49:36,681 --> 00:49:40,390 Yes... No, not exactly... 432 00:49:40,561 --> 00:49:46,750 Just from magazines at the hairdresser. He's a real playboy, ... 433 00:49:46,881 --> 00:49:50,920 ... and philanderer. If one can believe what you read. 434 00:49:51,081 --> 00:49:53,993 - I think ... - What do you think? 435 00:49:54,121 --> 00:50:00,371 - That I need to get in there and check on things. - Hurry up then, I'll stay here. 436 00:50:05,601 --> 00:50:08,718 Yes, mama... Yes, mama... 437 00:50:09,521 --> 00:50:11,113 Torben! 438 00:50:13,361 --> 00:50:14,999 Torben! 439 00:50:16,121 --> 00:50:21,514 - Have you seen my wife? - 3,462... plus the dance lessons ... 440 00:50:22,481 --> 00:50:25,917 Go back to sleep, Torben. 441 00:50:27,401 --> 00:50:31,076 Yes, mama... Of course, mama..., 442 00:50:34,001 --> 00:50:35,798 Yes, mama. 443 00:51:27,241 --> 00:51:29,038 No, mama. 444 00:51:29,761 --> 00:51:31,433 No, mama. 445 00:51:33,121 --> 00:51:34,873 No, mama. 446 00:51:42,441 --> 00:51:45,956 Torben! Who just left? 447 00:51:48,961 --> 00:51:53,916 - Wake up, Torben! You should be in bed. - What do you want? 448 00:51:54,201 --> 00:51:56,874 - Do you know who just left? - Left? 449 00:51:57,001 --> 00:52:03,031 Yes, left! Oh, go to bed. I'll close up. 450 00:52:13,601 --> 00:52:15,478 Yes, Reception. 451 00:52:16,641 --> 00:52:21,198 Max? Where did you go? I miss you. 452 00:52:22,801 --> 00:52:25,873 No... How long will you be there? 453 00:52:28,121 --> 00:52:30,919 Well then, I'll just lie down ... 454 00:52:31,041 --> 00:52:34,033 ... alone. Good night. 455 00:52:59,161 --> 00:53:03,916 Rise and shine! Brush your teeth, make the beds! 456 00:53:07,321 --> 00:53:10,870 Rise and shine! Brush your teeth, make the beds! 457 00:53:16,601 --> 00:53:18,956 Yes, I'll be right there! 458 00:53:20,241 --> 00:53:22,914 And for Professor Holst... 459 00:53:23,601 --> 00:53:28,470 - Five eggs for the "Doormat"? - Professor Holst, if you please! 460 00:53:28,601 --> 00:53:32,799 - He needs no salt! - No. 18 and No. 6, please. 461 00:53:32,961 --> 00:53:37,239 - Should I put salt in here? - Who takes salt in their coffee? 462 00:53:40,081 --> 00:53:46,064 - How do we know who is whose? - There's a difference between men and women. 463 00:54:08,241 --> 00:54:10,357 Good morning! 464 00:54:10,681 --> 00:54:16,414 What a lovely day! The roster for the morning ride. 465 00:54:31,201 --> 00:54:33,431 And so we mount up... 466 00:54:46,001 --> 00:54:50,358 - Is everyone stoned? - Erik says it's too much salt. 467 00:54:50,481 --> 00:54:55,350 Walk behind me through the green forest, in a line. Come on! 468 00:54:58,201 --> 00:55:02,797 Let's forget about the sugar bowl. We'll soon see if it's the right stuff. 469 00:55:05,001 --> 00:55:07,037 Good morning, ma'am, 470 00:55:08,441 --> 00:55:11,160 How did we sleep? 471 00:55:12,801 --> 00:55:15,998 - Please... - Breakfast in bed. How lovely. 472 00:55:16,121 --> 00:55:18,635 Eggs... and salt. 473 00:55:33,441 --> 00:55:36,678 Anything else I can do for madam? 474 00:55:37,561 --> 00:55:39,199 Enjoy... 475 00:55:41,721 --> 00:55:45,111 Was it enough? Was the witch powder in the shaker? 476 00:55:45,241 --> 00:55:50,913 Take this. We'll give her five minutes. Then you go in with the sugar bowl. 477 00:55:54,321 --> 00:55:59,475 - Come and eat now, honey. - Yes, thanks, I just need to... 478 00:56:00,201 --> 00:56:02,874 No thanks. I'm not hungry. 479 00:56:03,801 --> 00:56:07,919 You're always hungry in the morning. Who are you writing to? 480 00:56:08,041 --> 00:56:13,474 The Minister. Our last chance. I have to let him know we won't have enough. 481 00:56:15,641 --> 00:56:22,638 - Didn't you get anywhere with Mrs. Bostedt? - With Mrs. Bostedt? What do you mean? 482 00:56:24,201 --> 00:56:28,558 Wasn't that why you were rubbing up against her all evening? 483 00:56:28,681 --> 00:56:32,469 So what about you and that... Fabian? 484 00:56:33,561 --> 00:56:38,112 Max! I actually think you're jealous. 485 00:56:39,481 --> 00:56:42,041 Don't bother me now, Line. 486 00:57:06,041 --> 00:57:10,990 - We forgot the sugar. - That's so sweet... thanks. 487 00:57:15,001 --> 00:57:19,870 I love putting something hard in my mouth. You want some? 488 00:57:27,041 --> 00:57:31,990 - What beautiful teeth you have. - I lost a ... 489 00:57:32,121 --> 00:57:34,681 It isn't noticeable. 490 00:57:35,481 --> 00:57:41,078 Why... it isn't even noticeable that you're just a schoolboy. 491 00:57:41,521 --> 00:57:47,357 - I'm in the highest... - My... what big muscles you have! 492 00:57:48,321 --> 00:57:50,960 Take off your jacket. 493 00:57:51,321 --> 00:57:53,516 I'll help you. 494 00:57:55,521 --> 00:57:59,753 - No, Director, no! - Would the Director care for some coffee? 495 00:57:59,881 --> 00:58:02,998 - Yes, thank you. - Coffee first! 496 00:58:06,601 --> 00:58:12,153 How your heart is beating, my lovely boy. Feel mine... 497 00:58:14,761 --> 00:58:17,559 - I can't feel anything. - Then try here. 498 00:58:18,641 --> 00:58:21,713 Such soft, warm hands! 499 00:58:27,201 --> 00:58:31,558 - Won't you be happy when you get girls here? - I don't know. 500 00:58:31,681 --> 00:58:35,913 You can have all the girls you want. What's your name? 501 00:58:36,081 --> 00:58:38,293 - Søren. - Søren? 502 00:58:39,081 --> 00:58:42,437 You're really a naughty boy, Søren. 503 00:58:49,001 --> 00:58:54,155 - I know what you're after. - I wasn't after anything! 504 00:58:54,521 --> 00:58:56,955 The same thing all men want! 505 00:58:57,481 --> 00:59:01,315 - Be gentle... you're so experienced! - Someone might come in! 506 00:59:01,441 --> 00:59:05,275 Then be quick! Take me, big boy! 507 00:59:05,401 --> 00:59:07,756 - The riding lesson is at 10:00. - Ride me, ride me! 508 00:59:07,881 --> 00:59:11,430 No, not my underwear. It was never in the ad! 509 00:59:11,561 --> 00:59:16,937 Four minutes and he's already been sacrificed on the altar of science. 510 00:59:20,521 --> 00:59:23,319 You're sitting on my pee stick! 511 00:59:41,121 --> 00:59:44,431 Do you have to finish that stupid letter right now? 512 00:59:44,601 --> 00:59:49,277 Yes, you're right. You're absolutely right! 513 00:59:50,761 --> 00:59:52,240 Yes! 514 00:59:56,041 --> 00:59:59,351 I have to go and talk to the Minister. 515 01:00:00,041 --> 01:00:03,920 Man to man, eye to eye ... 516 01:00:27,201 --> 01:00:30,910 Men can be very strange. 517 01:00:31,361 --> 01:00:37,231 Yes, very strange, indeed. But perhaps they are necessary? 518 01:00:37,401 --> 01:00:42,998 - At certain times, of course. - Right. At certain times. 519 01:00:43,201 --> 01:00:46,273 It doesn't really matter which one you choose. 520 01:00:46,401 --> 01:00:50,440 Most believe they're dynamite. 521 01:00:50,761 --> 01:00:54,276 Yes, with their little package... 522 01:00:56,841 --> 01:01:00,151 While women lack for nothing... 523 01:01:00,281 --> 01:01:04,513 Oh, thank you. Thank you, sir... 524 01:01:12,721 --> 01:01:14,313 - Fabian? - Yes? 525 01:01:16,881 --> 01:01:21,632 Would you like to ... see my stamp collection? 526 01:01:23,881 --> 01:01:26,520 I'd love to! 527 01:01:53,921 --> 01:01:58,790 Please, Fabian, can't you stop this? It isn't that I ... 528 01:01:58,921 --> 01:02:03,073 Why should I? You're beautiful, Line. 529 01:02:03,201 --> 01:02:08,594 You know, I'm probably what's called a "neglected wife." 530 01:02:08,761 --> 01:02:12,834 Neglected wives are my specialty. 531 01:02:15,681 --> 01:02:20,880 - No! Not in my own bed! - That's what it's here for! 532 01:02:21,001 --> 01:02:24,038 I saw your husband leave. When will he be back? 533 01:02:26,121 --> 01:02:29,033 Now, I think... Yes, now! 534 01:02:29,201 --> 01:02:33,797 You stand there and look for him, while Uncle Fabian does his thing... 535 01:02:34,321 --> 01:02:37,119 Fabian! You pig! 536 01:04:04,961 --> 01:04:11,594 What is culture? And what is our cultural policy, some might ask. 537 01:04:12,041 --> 01:04:16,159 - I owe you the answer to that. - That's right! 538 01:04:19,881 --> 01:04:24,318 The honorable Member knows very well what our cultural policy stands for. 539 01:04:24,441 --> 01:04:27,956 We aren't here to debate culture. 540 01:04:29,001 --> 01:04:34,678 We, for our part, are of the opinion that the most noble cultural works ... 541 01:04:34,801 --> 01:04:40,114 ... come to us from the people. They come down from the common people. 542 01:04:40,241 --> 01:04:45,315 The wanderer Storm Petersen once quipped ... if Mr. President will allow ... 543 01:04:45,441 --> 01:04:52,950 "Androcles, what is culture?" You'd get this answer: "Something to polish the furniture with." 544 01:04:56,521 --> 01:05:02,790 Not least is the culture where a young headmaster and his dedicated students make ... 545 01:05:02,921 --> 01:05:08,234 ... a selfless effort to create a co-educational school, striking a blow for women's education! 546 01:05:08,401 --> 01:05:09,959 I agree! 547 01:05:11,041 --> 01:05:15,114 This is the kind... The kind of impact ... 548 01:05:15,241 --> 01:05:19,320 ... that we, for our part, would like to support. 549 01:05:31,921 --> 01:05:34,435 What do you think? 550 01:05:35,161 --> 01:05:37,834 I definitely... 551 01:05:38,001 --> 01:05:42,836 - "Father Playing the Violin" - And I definitely think ... 552 01:05:43,161 --> 01:05:45,914 ... I don't like it. Sorry. 553 01:05:46,721 --> 01:05:49,519 - 50,000! - 50,000? 554 01:05:49,721 --> 01:05:51,791 Per piece. 555 01:05:52,201 --> 01:05:56,752 - I could build two girls' classrooms with that! - Now, have a little patience... Max. 556 01:05:56,881 --> 01:06:02,160 You have my support, my moral support, for your girls' program. 557 01:06:05,321 --> 01:06:08,711 "Something to polish furniture with..." Did you hear that? 558 01:06:08,841 --> 01:06:12,516 He compared culture to furniture polish! 559 01:06:12,641 --> 01:06:15,314 - Did you understood it? - Yes... 560 01:06:17,521 --> 01:06:23,756 - When do you think the case will be decided? - It requires preparation. Like everything. 561 01:06:25,681 --> 01:06:30,709 - And how's my wife been doing? - Yes... Mrs. Bostedt has been very well. 562 01:06:30,841 --> 01:06:34,445 - I think she's really enjoyed herself. - Turn the key. 563 01:06:34,545 --> 01:06:36,978 - The key? - There, lock the door! 564 01:06:45,201 --> 01:06:51,071 Sometimes one needs to relax. Culture can be exhausting. 565 01:07:03,641 --> 01:07:06,314 You can easily become stressed out by new things. 566 01:07:06,441 --> 01:07:12,391 Isn't that true, Max? How's your wife doing at my old school? 567 01:07:12,561 --> 01:07:16,520 Excellent, thank you. Within reason ... 568 01:07:20,521 --> 01:07:23,274 - Yes? - Minister, your car is ready. 569 01:07:23,401 --> 01:07:28,031 - Where am I going now? - A sculpture unveiling, at People's Place. 570 01:07:28,561 --> 01:07:32,873 Now I remember it! Thanks. It's like this every single day. 571 01:07:33,001 --> 01:07:37,517 Well, duty calls. Come along, Max, we'll have lunch ... 572 01:07:37,641 --> 01:07:42,157 ... and discuss your problem. - Gladly, if I won't be a nuisance. 573 01:07:45,241 --> 01:07:51,077 The sculptor is talented. He gets government grants. We've provided for all his wives, ... 574 01:07:51,201 --> 01:07:55,717 ... and his many offspring for years and years. What a talent! 575 01:07:56,241 --> 01:08:00,632 Modern art, especially sculpture, ... 576 01:08:00,761 --> 01:08:05,755 ... is an answer that speaks for itself. 577 01:08:06,201 --> 01:08:11,912 The exquisite, sublime artwork. It speaks to us ... 578 01:08:12,081 --> 01:08:17,553 ... even before it is born, while it is still concealed within its mother's womb. 579 01:08:18,081 --> 01:08:25,112 She still a virgin. It is unconcerned, yet it... speaks to us. 580 01:08:25,281 --> 01:08:30,196 The artist's task today is to remain silent and eliminate the sublimation of works of art! 581 01:08:30,321 --> 01:08:35,793 People must not impose on others' perceptions. They must judge it for themselves ... 582 01:08:35,961 --> 01:08:40,432 Yes, exactly. And with those few well-chosen words ... 583 01:08:40,561 --> 01:08:44,474 ... I have the pleasure to unveil the sculpture which the artist has entitled: 584 01:08:44,601 --> 01:08:46,478 ... "Kiss my..."? 585 01:08:50,081 --> 01:08:52,197 "Kiss my..."! 586 01:09:09,361 --> 01:09:13,434 - Mama, there's nothing there. - Be quiet! Just applaud! 587 01:09:18,481 --> 01:09:25,512 I'm often a grass widower. In my position there's no time for a wife. 588 01:09:26,441 --> 01:09:31,037 I can't blame her if she's a little restless. 589 01:09:31,161 --> 01:09:36,793 - You can't understand such things at your age. - Yes, I certainly can, Mr. Bostedt. 590 01:09:38,641 --> 01:09:40,393 Unfortunately... 591 01:09:40,521 --> 01:09:45,436 You can? Yes, you can. That's encouraging. 592 01:09:45,801 --> 01:09:51,956 It is unfortunate that you can. However, Max ... 593 01:09:52,721 --> 01:09:58,398 ... I know a place where I'm not known. There is a solution to your problem. 594 01:09:58,521 --> 01:10:00,910 You need some preparation! 595 01:10:19,401 --> 01:10:24,973 What about this kind of preparation, Max? Does it provide a little stimulation? 596 01:10:25,041 --> 01:10:28,716 - Stimulation? - Yes, some new inspiration. 597 01:10:30,361 --> 01:10:32,750 External stimulation. 598 01:10:39,161 --> 01:10:44,315 - No, I'd rather eat at home. - What? Yes... of course. 599 01:10:44,441 --> 01:10:48,719 But, you can still get an appetite by looking. 600 01:10:48,841 --> 01:10:51,275 Hello, Minister! 601 01:10:51,881 --> 01:10:58,275 - Call me "Holgersen." I'm incognito. - Looking for a little culture tonight? 602 01:11:32,361 --> 01:11:35,398 I'm afraid I like girls. 603 01:11:37,041 --> 01:11:40,238 But you can buy me a beer. 604 01:11:40,441 --> 01:11:43,194 I never thought Max was like that! 605 01:12:20,081 --> 01:12:21,639 Line ... 606 01:12:22,081 --> 01:12:24,037 Are you asleep? 607 01:12:38,801 --> 01:12:41,554 What are you doing with that? 608 01:12:41,681 --> 01:12:47,339 What were you doing with it? Why were you sleeping with this in your hand? 609 01:12:47,841 --> 01:12:51,311 Where have you been? It's already light outside. 610 01:12:52,481 --> 01:12:56,997 In Copenhagen, we went out to eat, ... 611 01:12:57,161 --> 01:13:02,410 ... the Minister and I. I couldn't get away from him. 612 01:13:05,241 --> 01:13:08,199 I think he's very lonely. 613 01:13:09,721 --> 01:13:12,879 Then what do you think I am? 614 01:13:20,721 --> 01:13:25,920 - Stolen? - Not sold. We could have got 3,000 for it. 615 01:13:26,161 --> 01:13:30,393 - The matter must be cleared up. - What's happened? 616 01:13:30,521 --> 01:13:36,198 - The chastity belt is gone... stolen. - Logic says it must have been a woman. 617 01:13:36,321 --> 01:13:40,599 - At least it wasn't me. - No, that's out of the question. I know. 618 01:13:40,721 --> 01:13:44,031 Hugo, I brought you a little breakfast and some eggs. 619 01:13:44,601 --> 01:13:49,516 I will personally get to the bottom of this! Thank you, ... 620 01:13:50,761 --> 01:13:52,240 ... my sweet girl. 621 01:14:30,641 --> 01:14:33,599 Is that you, little brother? 622 01:14:33,721 --> 01:14:39,637 - Why were you chasing the peacock? - I was... looking for some eggs. 623 01:14:40,281 --> 01:14:47,073 - What are you looking for? - A little key that I... I dropped. 624 01:14:47,681 --> 01:14:54,075 - Inside the bushes here? - Eggs, you said. What are you doing with eggs? 625 01:14:54,201 --> 01:14:56,795 They're for an invention. 626 01:14:57,721 --> 01:15:02,033 - What are you working on now? - Can you keep a secret? 627 01:15:11,961 --> 01:15:17,593 - Do you think they use sea salt here? - Salt as salt, just use a little more! 628 01:15:17,801 --> 01:15:23,990 ... awaiting full payment from you within three days. Yours sincerely... 629 01:15:25,601 --> 01:15:30,231 And to Basse & Ralf, in response to your offer of ... 630 01:15:30,361 --> 01:15:33,797 - I'm hungry. - Yes, it's good that you remind me. 631 01:15:33,921 --> 01:15:35,952 Mama's coming. 632 01:15:36,161 --> 01:15:40,359 Your mama? On our honeymoon! 633 01:15:40,601 --> 01:15:44,111 - Where are you going? - I'm going to call her! 634 01:15:46,681 --> 01:15:53,439 Everything tastes different here in the country. I think my eggs were fertilized! 635 01:15:53,761 --> 01:15:58,994 - But they become extremely horny from it! - How can you say no to your sister? 636 01:15:59,121 --> 01:16:03,399 I'm sorry, Mrs. Headmaster! I'll be happy to give Max a little salty food. 637 01:16:03,561 --> 01:16:04,789 Thanks. 638 01:16:06,641 --> 01:16:12,238 - What was that noise? - Oh, these old benches crack like that. 639 01:16:12,521 --> 01:16:16,400 You should see the reports I've written about how the powder appears to work. 640 01:16:16,561 --> 01:16:22,079 It is absolutely amazing! I could write a dissertation on it. 641 01:16:30,801 --> 01:16:33,759 Your mother will not be coming! 642 01:16:33,895 --> 01:16:38,755 - Oh yeah? That's wonderful. - What do you mean? 643 01:16:39,961 --> 01:16:43,351 Hans... my man Hans... 644 01:16:56,921 --> 01:17:00,152 Don't use so much salt, Max, You're getting too much salt. 645 01:17:00,281 --> 01:17:04,320 Too much salt? I'm using no more salt than usual. 646 01:17:04,441 --> 01:17:09,231 You won't do well using that much salt. Not right now. 647 01:17:10,761 --> 01:17:15,551 1,500 for this fine thing? That's far too little! 648 01:17:15,681 --> 01:17:20,596 You should ask 2,000 for this. Then you'll make a little more money. 649 01:17:21,121 --> 01:17:25,831 I'll hang it over the bed in remembrance of you. 650 01:17:25,961 --> 01:17:30,154 Have you nothing else you want to sell? 651 01:18:12,041 --> 01:18:16,353 Was that you, dear Professor Holst? Did you want something? 652 01:18:16,481 --> 01:18:19,553 Sorry, I was just out with the Scouts. 653 01:18:19,681 --> 01:18:23,276 Professor Holst, there's a problem in the ironing shed. 654 01:18:23,401 --> 01:18:26,598 Ironing, of course. Excuse me... Good morning, 655 01:18:46,961 --> 01:18:48,360 Max! 656 01:18:49,681 --> 01:18:52,673 Good morning, Mrs. Bostedt. 657 01:18:53,121 --> 01:18:59,276 I'm so glad that you came. Can you please help me get it up there? 658 01:19:01,721 --> 01:19:06,590 It's just too big. I can't handle it by myself. 659 01:19:07,561 --> 01:19:10,075 Oh, the cannon! 660 01:19:10,281 --> 01:19:16,311 - I just bought it. Do you have time? - Of course I have time. 661 01:19:30,641 --> 01:19:37,314 - Are you sure it won't be too much for you? - No, not if it doesn't bother you. 662 01:19:46,241 --> 01:19:48,630 What the hell? 663 01:20:15,641 --> 01:20:19,395 - Why, Mrs. Bostedt! - Oh, Max... do you remember? 664 01:20:19,521 --> 01:20:23,958 - Yes... No! I was going to visit... - Yes, kiss me! 665 01:20:24,281 --> 01:20:26,670 No, Mrs. Bostedt, we can't... 666 01:20:27,441 --> 01:20:32,196 I know what I'm doing. Do it, Max! Do it! 667 01:20:34,721 --> 01:20:37,793 Can I join in? 668 01:20:57,481 --> 01:21:01,030 - What are you doing?! - Help me! Help me! Save me! 669 01:21:01,161 --> 01:21:04,198 We were doing so well. 670 01:21:04,321 --> 01:21:08,314 - What are you doing here? - Stop it, we were just having fun. 671 01:21:09,641 --> 01:21:12,872 I'll take care of you... 672 01:21:13,041 --> 01:21:18,069 I'll tell you one thing. You shouldn't start something you can't finish. 673 01:21:18,201 --> 01:21:23,275 I'll take enough care of Mrs. Bostedt. She and I are old acquaintances. 674 01:21:25,761 --> 01:21:28,116 Have a nice day! 675 01:21:30,107 --> 01:21:32,474 - Good day. - Good day. 676 01:21:36,481 --> 01:21:41,282 - Oh, Fabian, you're too horrible! - Oh, yeah? I'm just the way you like me. 677 01:21:41,382 --> 01:21:42,791 Come here, Fabian! 678 01:22:23,401 --> 01:22:27,030 Hello? Is my husband there? 679 01:22:27,241 --> 01:22:31,519 The Headmaster? He just went upstairs with Mrs. Bostedt. 680 01:22:36,641 --> 01:22:39,235 Yes, it was some time ago. 681 01:22:46,481 --> 01:22:51,396 Headmaster Mikkelsen, a telegram. And your wife just called. 682 01:22:52,201 --> 01:22:55,273 What do you think, Torben? 683 01:22:55,401 --> 01:22:58,359 We have to face the facts. We won't make it. 684 01:22:58,481 --> 01:23:03,999 If only it wasn't back to school tomorrow. One more week and we might have made it. 685 01:23:09,601 --> 01:23:11,956 Is there something wrong? 686 01:23:39,207 --> 01:23:42,321 Yes!! 687 01:23:56,001 --> 01:23:58,561 - How much? 50,000? - Yes! 688 01:23:58,681 --> 01:24:01,320 - Kronor? - Yes! 689 01:24:02,481 --> 01:24:05,632 Hurrah! The girls are coming into port! 690 01:24:06,681 --> 01:24:11,709 And it was our old Culture Minister Bostedt who arranged it! 691 01:24:11,841 --> 01:24:15,151 Long live the Culture Minister! 692 01:24:22,641 --> 01:24:24,199 Line! 693 01:24:27,721 --> 01:24:31,634 We've got a 50,000 contribution! It's fantastic! 694 01:24:31,761 --> 01:24:34,116 Congratulations, Max. 695 01:24:34,801 --> 01:24:38,999 Can you forgive me? I thought you were up there. 696 01:24:39,121 --> 01:24:44,320 It's me, darling! It really is! Come, let's go up and celebrate. 697 01:24:44,441 --> 01:24:50,073 - Yes... No. I can't right now. - But I'm not stressed anymore! 698 01:24:50,201 --> 01:24:53,796 - Not at all! - But I might be... 699 01:24:54,241 --> 01:24:59,156 I can do it, Sweetheart. I'm sure that I can do it now. 700 01:24:59,441 --> 01:25:01,955 Yes, but I can't. 701 01:25:27,561 --> 01:25:30,394 It's the last one. You first... 702 01:25:57,201 --> 01:26:04,239 - Didn't you promise to give him a higher post? - He can't get much higher. 703 01:26:20,321 --> 01:26:21,993 Silence! 704 01:26:23,801 --> 01:26:26,838 Krab... Krab... Krabbesø! 705 01:26:27,641 --> 01:26:30,474 Rektor Primus! 706 01:26:31,401 --> 01:26:33,135 Non plus ult... 707 01:26:34,037 --> 01:26:35,310 ... ultra! 708 01:27:23,001 --> 01:27:27,472 New times have come to an old school. 709 01:27:27,601 --> 01:27:31,310 We gather here to usher in a new term. 710 01:27:31,481 --> 01:27:35,952 The first term in the history of the old Krabbesögård scholars' school ... 711 01:27:36,081 --> 01:27:41,439 ... in which boys and girls go hand-in-hand, absorbing their lessons ... 712 01:27:41,561 --> 01:27:45,440 ... and culture in the fullness ... 713 01:27:45,601 --> 01:27:49,116 ... of their equality and intellect. 714 01:27:51,881 --> 01:27:54,873 This day is first and foremost a triumph ... 715 01:27:55,001 --> 01:27:57,879 ... for our dear young Headmaster, ... 716 01:27:58,481 --> 01:28:01,712 ... who, despite opposition, stood firm, ... 717 01:28:01,841 --> 01:28:06,039 ... and stuck something between... between her legs ... 718 01:28:07,161 --> 01:28:11,120 ... who didn't turn tail when he might have. 719 01:28:13,241 --> 01:28:20,635 Modesty forbids the Headmaster and his wife from receiving the tribute they deserve. 720 01:28:21,041 --> 01:28:24,636 We that remain, pledge ... 721 01:28:24,761 --> 01:28:31,075 ... together with me, to protect our girls... our women. 722 01:28:40,081 --> 01:28:43,118 Man wasn't created to be alone, ... 723 01:28:43,241 --> 01:28:45,960 ... as it says in the old scripture. 724 01:28:46,081 --> 01:28:51,050 And that is no less true for women. 725 01:28:52,321 --> 01:28:55,836 A school without girls is like a mop without a bucket, ... 726 01:28:55,961 --> 01:28:59,033 ... as it is written ... somewhere. 727 01:28:59,201 --> 01:29:02,289 This old school for boys comes to its inevitable end, ... 728 01:29:02,389 --> 01:29:05,893 .... proud of it's successful history. 729 01:29:23,201 --> 01:29:26,273 We can't live without girls ... 730 01:29:29,961 --> 01:29:32,634 ... if we're to enjoy all aspects of life, ... 731 01:29:36,561 --> 01:29:38,995 ... not just the cultural ones. 732 01:29:39,401 --> 01:29:41,232 1 minute, 24 seconds. 733 01:29:43,041 --> 01:29:46,636 We profess to be a group, ... 734 01:29:46,761 --> 01:29:50,071 ... a community of every sexes, ... 735 01:29:51,001 --> 01:29:54,676 ... with a communal pulpet, a bed under our own tables. 736 01:30:08,561 --> 01:30:10,995 Hurry up...! 737 01:30:14,481 --> 01:30:20,192 I appeal to the gentlemen, to your common sense, and to the ladies, ... 738 01:30:20,641 --> 01:30:22,677 ... to the ladies, then! 739 01:30:30,681 --> 01:30:34,959 You're getting spanked! Spanked by your daddy. 740 01:30:36,561 --> 01:30:41,589 The ancient poets rode their muses, like Pegasi into a battle to unite the sexes, ... 741 01:30:41,721 --> 01:30:46,022 ... in sickness and in health, in sexual intercourse, in mutual accord! 742 01:30:52,721 --> 01:30:55,990 Never forgetting wine, women and song! 743 01:30:58,241 --> 01:31:03,679 It's time to tear down the inequality in our midst, and wake up with one another! 744 01:31:13,961 --> 01:31:17,078 But now... But now, then... ! 745 01:31:35,281 --> 01:31:37,670 Sodom and Gomorrah! 64192

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.