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1
00:00:10,134 --> 00:00:11,134
Oops.
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00:00:36,375 --> 00:00:40,686
♪ Tell me why I
love you like I do
3
00:00:40,824 --> 00:00:43,548
♪ And tell me who
can stop my heart
4
00:00:43,686 --> 00:00:45,272
♪ As much as you
5
00:00:45,410 --> 00:00:47,341
♪ Let's take each other's hand
6
00:00:47,479 --> 00:00:50,548
♪ And jump into
the final frontier ♪
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00:00:59,238 --> 00:01:01,273
Okay, Mabel, let me ask you.
8
00:01:01,411 --> 00:01:03,307
She's your mother,
so you know her.
9
00:01:03,445 --> 00:01:06,169
Which do you think she would
rather have for Mother's Day?
10
00:01:06,858 --> 00:01:10,582
Choice A, a lovely scarf. See?
11
00:01:10,720 --> 00:01:12,893
That she can wear
about the neck,
12
00:01:13,031 --> 00:01:14,927
and when she gets
older, about the head.
13
00:01:18,031 --> 00:01:19,065
All right, sure.
14
00:01:19,204 --> 00:01:21,307
Or potential gift number two,
15
00:01:22,169 --> 00:01:23,342
nut clusters.
16
00:01:25,514 --> 00:01:26,858
Okay.
17
00:01:26,996 --> 00:01:28,076
You know what?
18
00:01:28,100 --> 00:01:30,652
You're really not
helping much here.
19
00:01:30,790 --> 00:01:32,135
And need I remind you
20
00:01:32,273 --> 00:01:33,903
that both our names
are gonna be on this gift,
21
00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:35,825
so you might wanna
shape up, my little honey.
22
00:01:36,996 --> 00:01:37,996
Yeah.
23
00:01:38,100 --> 00:01:39,687
Hey, Paulie, James home?
24
00:01:39,825 --> 00:01:41,790
Uh... No. She and
Fran went to Nike town.
25
00:01:41,928 --> 00:01:43,825
Great. Marvin, bring it in.
26
00:01:44,342 --> 00:01:45,342
Bring what in?
27
00:01:45,411 --> 00:01:47,065
It's my Mother's
Day gift for James.
28
00:01:47,204 --> 00:01:49,480
I brought it today because
I'm working on Sunday.
29
00:01:49,618 --> 00:01:50,825
A rocking chair?
30
00:01:50,963 --> 00:01:51,963
Yes.
31
00:01:52,066 --> 00:01:53,066
That's a great present.
32
00:01:53,135 --> 00:01:54,687
I know. She can
sit, she can rock.
33
00:01:54,825 --> 00:01:56,066
Oh, look at this.
34
00:01:56,204 --> 00:01:57,376
She can hold Mabel,
35
00:01:57,514 --> 00:01:59,318
she can rock her to sleep,
and she can sing to her.
36
00:01:59,342 --> 00:02:00,382
She could sing. Of course.
37
00:02:00,514 --> 00:02:02,273
Old MacDonald,
farmer in the dell,
38
00:02:02,411 --> 00:02:03,894
do you know the muffin man?
39
00:02:04,032 --> 00:02:06,652
I get it. All songs would
work with the chair. This is...
40
00:02:06,790 --> 00:02:08,205
This is a great present.
41
00:02:08,342 --> 00:02:09,445
Well, thank you.
42
00:02:09,583 --> 00:02:11,223
You know what this
means, don't you? What?
43
00:02:11,308 --> 00:02:13,387
My wife is getting a better
Mother's Day present from you
44
00:02:13,411 --> 00:02:14,445
than she is from me.
45
00:02:14,583 --> 00:02:15,790
Why? What are you giving her?
46
00:02:15,928 --> 00:02:17,066
Ah, nut clusters.
47
00:02:18,756 --> 00:02:19,756
Nut clusters?
48
00:02:19,825 --> 00:02:20,825
Or a scarf.
49
00:02:21,308 --> 00:02:22,308
Anything else?
50
00:02:22,377 --> 00:02:23,825
Maybe nut clusters and a scarf.
51
00:02:24,549 --> 00:02:26,239
I know what you do.
52
00:02:26,377 --> 00:02:27,790
You're keeping
the standards low.
53
00:02:27,928 --> 00:02:29,894
That way, next year,
Mother's Day rolls around,
54
00:02:30,032 --> 00:02:31,388
and you get her like
a pizza or something,
55
00:02:31,412 --> 00:02:32,790
you're a big star.
56
00:02:32,928 --> 00:02:34,446
Okay, here's what's
gonna happen.
57
00:02:34,584 --> 00:02:35,894
I'm giving her
the rocking chair.
58
00:02:37,652 --> 00:02:38,732
What's the matter with you?
59
00:02:38,756 --> 00:02:40,388
Please? Let me give
her the rocking chair.
60
00:02:40,412 --> 00:02:42,032
It's such a great present.
61
00:02:42,170 --> 00:02:43,239
Paulie, come on. Please?
62
00:02:43,377 --> 00:02:44,801
Listen, I'll give her
the rocking chair,
63
00:02:44,825 --> 00:02:46,170
you can give her the scarf,
64
00:02:46,308 --> 00:02:47,388
and then you keep the
nut clusters for yourself.
65
00:02:47,412 --> 00:02:48,457
I know how much you like them,
66
00:02:48,481 --> 00:02:49,757
and everybody walks away happy.
67
00:02:49,894 --> 00:02:52,274
You would do that. You
would steal my thunder like that.
68
00:02:52,515 --> 00:02:53,515
Yeah.
69
00:02:54,239 --> 00:02:55,446
That hurts, Paulie.
70
00:02:55,584 --> 00:02:57,722
Oh, come on. She's my wife,
71
00:02:57,860 --> 00:02:59,042
and I've been
wracking my brains.
72
00:02:59,066 --> 00:03:00,791
I'm totally out of ideas now.
73
00:03:00,929 --> 00:03:02,136
Oh, Paul...
74
00:03:02,274 --> 00:03:04,446
Ye of little imagination.
75
00:03:04,584 --> 00:03:05,584
What's that?
76
00:03:05,653 --> 00:03:07,515
Mother's Day offers
the imaginative man
77
00:03:07,653 --> 00:03:08,964
a wealth of possibilities.
78
00:03:09,101 --> 00:03:10,274
Listen to him, Paulie.
79
00:03:10,412 --> 00:03:11,457
When it comes to Mother's Day,
80
00:03:11,481 --> 00:03:12,515
Marvin is the champ.
81
00:03:12,653 --> 00:03:13,929
All right, champ.
82
00:03:14,067 --> 00:03:15,629
I'm serious. Tell him what
you're doing for your mom.
83
00:03:15,653 --> 00:03:17,757
You know those giant video
screens in Times Square,
84
00:03:17,895 --> 00:03:18,964
about a block high?
85
00:03:19,102 --> 00:03:20,102
It's amazing.
86
00:03:20,171 --> 00:03:21,388
I'm having a
Mother's Day message
87
00:03:21,412 --> 00:03:22,791
displayed for her there.
88
00:03:22,929 --> 00:03:25,446
It'll be dazzling and special,
89
00:03:25,584 --> 00:03:27,791
and she'll love it.
90
00:03:27,929 --> 00:03:30,619
Okay. I'm giving Jamie
the video screen message.
91
00:03:30,757 --> 00:03:32,137
No way! Yes, I am.
92
00:03:32,275 --> 00:03:33,388
Come on, come on. I'll
give you the rocking chair,
93
00:03:33,412 --> 00:03:34,629
you can give it to your mother.
94
00:03:34,653 --> 00:03:35,791
You give Jamie the scarf,
95
00:03:35,929 --> 00:03:37,113
and then you guys
split the nut clusters,
96
00:03:37,137 --> 00:03:38,354
and everybody walks away happy.
97
00:03:38,378 --> 00:03:40,206
Wait a minute. I don't
even like nut clusters.
98
00:03:40,344 --> 00:03:41,447
I'll eat the nut
clusters, all right? I'll eat
99
00:03:41,471 --> 00:03:42,526
the nut clusters and
I'll return the scarf.
100
00:03:42,550 --> 00:03:44,802
We'll both have a little message
up on the Times Square board.
101
00:03:44,826 --> 00:03:46,216
You can give Jamie the
rocking chair, like you wanted.
102
00:03:46,240 --> 00:03:47,285
Everybody walks away happy.
103
00:03:47,309 --> 00:03:48,860
Not everybody. Yeah, but I do.
104
00:03:53,447 --> 00:03:54,527
All right, what do
you think of this?
105
00:03:54,551 --> 00:03:57,482
"To Jamie, you're
some kind of mom."
106
00:03:57,620 --> 00:03:58,929
Will she like that?
107
00:03:59,067 --> 00:04:00,147
Or you think, like, maybe
she'll be wondering,
108
00:04:00,171 --> 00:04:01,791
you know? "Okay,
I'm some kind of mom,
109
00:04:01,929 --> 00:04:03,723
but maybe he doesn't
know what kind."
110
00:04:03,860 --> 00:04:05,551
I can't imagine anybody
taking it that way.
111
00:04:05,689 --> 00:04:06,729
What do you think, Marvin?
112
00:04:06,826 --> 00:04:07,929
You stole my idea.
113
00:04:08,689 --> 00:04:10,620
Don't be like that, Marvin.
114
00:04:11,516 --> 00:04:13,113
Why don't you have
some joy in your heart
115
00:04:13,137 --> 00:04:14,837
that you reached out, and
you helped your brother?
116
00:04:14,861 --> 00:04:16,516
Drop dead. If you can.
117
00:04:16,654 --> 00:04:19,137
"You're some kind of mom"?
118
00:04:19,275 --> 00:04:20,768
Did a light bulb
appear above your head
119
00:04:20,792 --> 00:04:22,758
before you thought of that one?
120
00:04:22,896 --> 00:04:24,689
What are you putting
up there, big shot?
121
00:04:24,827 --> 00:04:26,447
Oh, wouldn't you like to know?
122
00:04:26,585 --> 00:04:28,896
Well, if you're gonna
mock me, I'd like to see.
123
00:04:29,034 --> 00:04:30,102
Okay.
124
00:04:30,240 --> 00:04:31,760
Just so you know
what true artistry is.
125
00:04:32,965 --> 00:04:33,965
Look at this.
126
00:04:34,034 --> 00:04:35,620
Next, please.
127
00:04:35,758 --> 00:04:39,138
"Is there anything purer
than your sweet love
128
00:04:39,275 --> 00:04:41,344
in Earth beneath or sky above?"
129
00:04:41,482 --> 00:04:43,378
What? No, nothing.
130
00:04:43,516 --> 00:04:44,861
It's a little
schmaltzy, you know?
131
00:04:45,792 --> 00:04:46,792
No.
132
00:04:46,896 --> 00:04:48,482
Hey, hey, hey, easy, easy.
133
00:04:48,620 --> 00:04:50,310
Okay. That's all I
need is this criticism
134
00:04:50,447 --> 00:04:52,310
from the author of
"you're some kind of mom."
135
00:04:52,447 --> 00:04:54,034
All right, Marvin.
136
00:04:54,172 --> 00:04:55,758
What else have
you written, Paul?
137
00:04:55,896 --> 00:04:57,276
"Get well soon"?
138
00:04:57,414 --> 00:04:58,854
Just keep reading.
Now, what you got?
139
00:04:58,896 --> 00:05:01,276
"No sunset has your warmth.
140
00:05:01,414 --> 00:05:03,103
No ocean has your depth.
141
00:05:03,241 --> 00:05:05,345
You hold me when I ache.
142
00:05:05,483 --> 00:05:07,723
You stroke me when I wepth."
143
00:05:10,654 --> 00:05:11,654
What?
144
00:05:13,276 --> 00:05:14,276
"Wepth"?
145
00:05:15,414 --> 00:05:16,414
What about it?
146
00:05:17,655 --> 00:05:18,690
Nothing.
147
00:05:18,827 --> 00:05:21,621
"Always thinking
of your milky skin."
148
00:05:21,758 --> 00:05:23,310
Hmm.
149
00:05:23,448 --> 00:05:25,310
"Your raspy little laugh,
150
00:05:25,448 --> 00:05:28,138
the time we talked till dawn."
151
00:05:28,276 --> 00:05:30,345
This is your actual
biological mother?
152
00:05:31,483 --> 00:05:32,483
Read the ending.
153
00:05:32,621 --> 00:05:35,690
Oh. "Oh, so sweet,
so coy, so sassy.
154
00:05:35,828 --> 00:05:38,793
I'll always love you,
my beautiful Cassie."
155
00:05:39,931 --> 00:05:41,862
Cassie's... My mother.
156
00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:43,793
Of course she is.
Okay. All right, all right.
157
00:05:43,931 --> 00:05:46,138
And then after they
show the message,
158
00:05:46,276 --> 00:05:48,414
I'm gonna have them
scan in a picture of her.
159
00:05:48,552 --> 00:05:50,114
I'm gonna do that. That's
a great idea, Marvin.
160
00:05:50,138 --> 00:05:51,448
Thank you for that idea.
161
00:05:51,586 --> 00:05:52,759
Next, please.
162
00:05:53,379 --> 00:05:54,517
Hi. How are you?
163
00:05:54,655 --> 00:05:56,448
Here's what I've
come up with so far.
164
00:05:56,586 --> 00:05:59,241
Is to my wife. "To Jamie,
you're some kind of mom."
165
00:05:59,379 --> 00:06:00,828
What do you think of that?
166
00:06:00,966 --> 00:06:02,700
"You're some kind of mom."
Is that good? You like that?
167
00:06:02,724 --> 00:06:04,379
It's the best one
we've ever had.
168
00:06:10,448 --> 00:06:13,931
Wow. Isn't this lovely?
169
00:06:14,069 --> 00:06:15,804
Wait till you hear what
I'm doing for Jamie. What?
170
00:06:15,828 --> 00:06:19,277
At exactly 7:37, I'm gonna take
her up to the Marriot Marquis,
171
00:06:19,415 --> 00:06:21,035
and we're gonna
look out the window,
172
00:06:21,173 --> 00:06:23,322
and she's gonna see this huge
and gigantic Mother's Day greeting
173
00:06:23,346 --> 00:06:26,242
That I wrote up on the
Times Square screen.
174
00:06:26,380 --> 00:06:29,139
Wow. You are really
pulling out all the stops.
175
00:06:29,277 --> 00:06:31,793
And I should know
because I'm still using
176
00:06:31,931 --> 00:06:34,035
The bath powder
you gave me last year.
177
00:06:35,759 --> 00:06:38,242
Ma, you know, don't you?
178
00:06:38,380 --> 00:06:40,173
There's a big
surprise for you, too.
179
00:06:40,311 --> 00:06:43,000
Me? I don't need
a fuss. I've had 'em.
180
00:06:43,139 --> 00:06:45,242
I'm ashamed to tell you
how many Mother's Days.
181
00:06:46,587 --> 00:06:47,897
What kind of surprise?
182
00:06:48,035 --> 00:06:49,035
What's that?
183
00:06:49,104 --> 00:06:50,139
What kind of surprise?
184
00:06:50,966 --> 00:06:51,966
A present.
185
00:06:52,035 --> 00:06:54,242
Big, very thoughtful present.
186
00:06:54,380 --> 00:06:56,980
And a card. A card and present
together with the card. One second.
187
00:06:57,656 --> 00:06:58,696
Okay, I got a big problem.
188
00:06:58,725 --> 00:06:59,736
I forgot to get mom a present.
189
00:06:59,760 --> 00:07:01,380
Oh, Paul.
190
00:07:01,518 --> 00:07:02,277
I was so busy with the Jamie
stuff, I totally slipped my mind.
191
00:07:02,415 --> 00:07:03,794
Did you get her anything?
192
00:07:03,932 --> 00:07:05,208
Yeah. Make it from both of us.
193
00:07:05,346 --> 00:07:06,760
No. Oh, come on. Why not?
194
00:07:06,898 --> 00:07:07,977
Because it's not
the kind of thing...
195
00:07:08,001 --> 00:07:09,046
Oh, Debbie, please, please?
196
00:07:09,070 --> 00:07:10,691
Debbie please what?
197
00:07:10,829 --> 00:07:13,725
Okay. Uh, Ma, you
remember last week
198
00:07:13,863 --> 00:07:15,725
when I took you to see
The Scarlet Pimpernel?
199
00:07:15,863 --> 00:07:17,622
Yeah. Yeah, well,
that was from Paul, too.
200
00:07:23,898 --> 00:07:24,898
Told ya.
201
00:07:27,209 --> 00:07:28,380
I'm sorry, Ma. It's just...
202
00:07:28,518 --> 00:07:30,622
In my myopia, I forgot.
203
00:07:30,760 --> 00:07:31,794
Fine.
204
00:07:31,932 --> 00:07:33,140
In my myopia, I'm saying.
205
00:07:33,278 --> 00:07:35,001
Paul, please, it's nothing.
206
00:07:36,174 --> 00:07:38,036
Really? Nothing.
207
00:07:38,898 --> 00:07:40,794
She says it's
nothing, but in fact...
208
00:07:40,932 --> 00:07:41,932
Yeah. It's something.
209
00:07:43,485 --> 00:07:45,622
Now, hold the
calendar a little higher.
210
00:07:45,760 --> 00:07:46,760
Point to the date.
211
00:07:47,725 --> 00:07:49,347
What's the matter
with this damn thing?
212
00:07:49,485 --> 00:07:51,623
Oh, Burt, are you okay?
213
00:07:51,760 --> 00:07:53,278
Hey, how are you? Jamie Buchman?
214
00:07:53,725 --> 00:07:54,725
Uh, no, but...
215
00:07:54,794 --> 00:07:55,794
I don't care who you are.
216
00:07:55,829 --> 00:07:56,829
Just sign here.
217
00:07:57,519 --> 00:07:59,174
Okay. Here you go.
218
00:07:59,312 --> 00:08:00,416
"Klondike Pete"?
219
00:08:00,554 --> 00:08:02,514
Yeah, well, you don't care
who I am. There you go.
220
00:08:04,519 --> 00:08:07,036
More flowers for you.
Oh! From Mark and Fran.
221
00:08:07,174 --> 00:08:08,174
Oh, how sweet.
222
00:08:08,243 --> 00:08:09,288
Isn't that nice? I'll put this
223
00:08:09,312 --> 00:08:11,485
with the other 743,000 flowers.
224
00:08:11,623 --> 00:08:13,623
Oh, how nice. Ma...
225
00:08:13,761 --> 00:08:15,450
I'm saying, "how nice."
226
00:08:16,450 --> 00:08:18,795
Okay, I think we should
open some presents.
227
00:08:18,933 --> 00:08:20,347
There's a good
idea, opening gifts.
228
00:08:20,485 --> 00:08:23,795
Oh, what a lovely
looking rocking chair.
229
00:08:23,933 --> 00:08:26,037
Good idea. We'll start
with something big.
230
00:08:26,174 --> 00:08:28,657
No. I think there may be
something here for you, Deb.
231
00:08:28,795 --> 00:08:32,554
Oh, from Ira. "With love to
my favorite mother Jamie."
232
00:08:33,588 --> 00:08:34,864
Oh, my God!
233
00:08:35,002 --> 00:08:37,244
Oh, my God.
234
00:08:47,795 --> 00:08:48,795
Cake? Yeah, cake.
235
00:08:48,864 --> 00:08:50,450
Cake! That's a good idea.
236
00:08:50,588 --> 00:08:52,188
Come on in and have
some of Jamie's cake.
237
00:08:52,279 --> 00:08:53,692
Cake for all the mothers.
238
00:08:53,830 --> 00:08:55,002
Later for me.
239
00:09:23,762 --> 00:09:24,899
Help me!
240
00:09:26,002 --> 00:09:27,002
Ma? Oh, my God!
241
00:09:27,071 --> 00:09:28,279
Sylvia! Are you okay?
242
00:09:28,417 --> 00:09:29,693
I've broken a leg.
243
00:09:29,831 --> 00:09:30,831
Are you sure?
244
00:09:30,934 --> 00:09:32,244
Oh, it's definitely broken.
245
00:09:32,382 --> 00:09:34,324
All right, Sylvia. Don't move.
I'm gonna call an ambulance.
246
00:09:34,348 --> 00:09:36,555
Oh, no, no, please, dear.
247
00:09:36,693 --> 00:09:38,037
Finish your cake,
248
00:09:38,175 --> 00:09:40,141
then we'll worry about me.
249
00:09:47,313 --> 00:09:48,555
How do you feel, Ma?
250
00:09:48,693 --> 00:09:50,038
I'm fine, thank you.
251
00:09:50,176 --> 00:09:51,520
Don't be so concerned.
252
00:09:51,658 --> 00:09:52,658
It's only a limb.
253
00:09:52,693 --> 00:09:53,693
Oh, Ma.
254
00:09:55,589 --> 00:09:57,520
You know what's
really killing me?
255
00:09:57,658 --> 00:09:58,693
The cling.
256
00:09:58,831 --> 00:09:59,831
The what?
257
00:09:59,900 --> 00:10:01,107
The static cling.
258
00:10:01,245 --> 00:10:03,555
My pants are
clinging to the sheets,
259
00:10:03,693 --> 00:10:05,107
it's driving me crazy.
260
00:10:06,451 --> 00:10:07,589
God bless you, Sylvia,
261
00:10:07,727 --> 00:10:09,865
worrying about static
cling at a time like this.
262
00:10:10,003 --> 00:10:11,658
Do me a favor. Get
me the static guard.
263
00:10:11,796 --> 00:10:13,038
It's in my purse. Thank you.
264
00:10:13,176 --> 00:10:14,176
Sure, Ma.
265
00:10:14,762 --> 00:10:15,762
You poor thing.
266
00:10:15,831 --> 00:10:17,934
I feel so terrible
that this happened.
267
00:10:18,072 --> 00:10:21,142
All I can say is
better me than you.
268
00:10:21,900 --> 00:10:23,107
Found the doctor.
269
00:10:23,245 --> 00:10:25,383
Mrs. Buchman, hi, I'm Dr. Hill.
270
00:10:25,521 --> 00:10:26,969
Doctor, thank goodness.
271
00:10:27,107 --> 00:10:28,314
Let's take a look, shall we?
272
00:10:28,452 --> 00:10:29,487
Yes.
273
00:10:31,865 --> 00:10:32,865
Mrs. Buchman...
274
00:10:32,969 --> 00:10:33,979
You do what you have to do.
275
00:10:34,003 --> 00:10:35,003
Okay.
276
00:10:35,072 --> 00:10:36,072
Ow.
277
00:10:36,142 --> 00:10:38,038
Oh, boy, Mom's
got some grip, huh?
278
00:10:38,176 --> 00:10:39,659
How would you describe the pain?
279
00:10:39,797 --> 00:10:41,072
Like a squeezing sensation.
280
00:10:42,728 --> 00:10:44,245
I can't even feel
the pinky. It's so.
281
00:10:44,934 --> 00:10:45,934
Your mom's pain.
282
00:10:46,003 --> 00:10:47,452
Of course, of course.
283
00:10:47,590 --> 00:10:50,245
It's unrelenting and severe.
284
00:10:50,383 --> 00:10:52,280
Oh, my little fragile dove.
285
00:10:52,832 --> 00:10:53,832
Ah! Ohh!
286
00:10:53,901 --> 00:10:54,901
Bad there?
287
00:10:54,970 --> 00:10:56,728
Oh, my God.
288
00:10:56,866 --> 00:10:59,073
You go ahead. Do
what you have to do.
289
00:10:59,211 --> 00:11:01,142
You're a very brave
woman, Mrs. Buchman.
290
00:11:01,280 --> 00:11:02,935
I know.
291
00:11:03,073 --> 00:11:05,590
All right. I wanna send you
over for a couple of X-rays,
292
00:11:05,728 --> 00:11:06,728
just in case.
293
00:11:06,763 --> 00:11:07,935
Oh, my God.
294
00:11:08,073 --> 00:11:09,590
Why don't you all
meet her back here
295
00:11:09,728 --> 00:11:10,728
in about 25 minutes?
296
00:11:10,763 --> 00:11:11,763
Okay, okay.
297
00:11:11,832 --> 00:11:12,935
Bye, Ma. We love you.
298
00:11:13,073 --> 00:11:14,325
We'll see you
shortly, sweetheart.
299
00:11:14,349 --> 00:11:15,349
Courage, Sylvia.
300
00:11:17,004 --> 00:11:19,177
Best mom in the world,
that's what you are.
301
00:11:19,315 --> 00:11:21,521
I'd wave, except for the pain.
302
00:11:22,625 --> 00:11:23,970
Those darn Amish.
303
00:11:24,281 --> 00:11:25,452
Amish?
304
00:11:25,590 --> 00:11:27,084
Well, they invented the
rocking chair, didn't they?
305
00:11:27,108 --> 00:11:28,315
I don't think it was them.
306
00:11:28,452 --> 00:11:29,808
I forgot my coat. I'll
meet you down there.
307
00:11:29,832 --> 00:11:31,728
They invented the
shoehorn years ago.
308
00:11:43,212 --> 00:11:44,212
Hi, Sylvia.
309
00:11:45,901 --> 00:11:47,660
I was, uh... You know...
310
00:11:47,797 --> 00:11:50,522
I was just testing it out.
311
00:11:50,660 --> 00:11:51,660
How'd that go for you?
312
00:11:52,729 --> 00:11:55,004
Oh, fine. It's fine.
313
00:11:55,143 --> 00:11:56,281
Responded well, the leg?
314
00:11:56,419 --> 00:11:58,384
Surprisingly well, yes.
315
00:11:58,522 --> 00:12:00,522
Sylvia, you didn't actually
hurt your leg, did you?
316
00:12:00,626 --> 00:12:02,833
Sure, I did. Sylvia.
317
00:12:02,970 --> 00:12:05,970
Well, for your information,
even as we speak,
318
00:12:06,108 --> 00:12:10,695
I'm in the midst of wave
upon wave of searing pain.
319
00:12:10,833 --> 00:12:12,039
Sylvia.
320
00:12:12,177 --> 00:12:15,108
I mean, walk a mile in
my shoes before you judge.
321
00:12:15,246 --> 00:12:17,177
Not that you could,
in my condition.
322
00:12:18,695 --> 00:12:20,040
Sylvia.
323
00:12:20,177 --> 00:12:23,005
All right. I didn't hurt my leg.
324
00:12:24,246 --> 00:12:27,246
I mean, you have one baby,
and suddenly I'm nothing.
325
00:12:27,384 --> 00:12:28,384
What?
326
00:12:28,453 --> 00:12:29,705
I mean, it's not
that I begrudge you
327
00:12:29,729 --> 00:12:31,695
the outpouring of
love from your family.
328
00:12:31,833 --> 00:12:32,833
No, of course not.
329
00:12:32,971 --> 00:12:34,557
Except when it
comes at my expense.
330
00:12:35,453 --> 00:12:36,453
I understand.
331
00:12:37,316 --> 00:12:38,350
I'm so ashamed.
332
00:12:38,488 --> 00:12:39,729
Oh, no. Sylvia, don't be.
333
00:12:39,867 --> 00:12:41,074
No, I'm ashamed. No, don't be.
334
00:12:41,213 --> 00:12:42,626
I'm telling you I'm ashamed!
335
00:12:42,764 --> 00:12:44,385
Then be ashamed, be ashamed.
336
00:12:44,522 --> 00:12:46,488
For God's sakes, someone
says they're ashamed,
337
00:12:46,626 --> 00:12:48,522
let them be ashamed.
338
00:12:48,660 --> 00:12:54,282
I shudder to think of the weakness
of character that I have shown.
339
00:12:55,005 --> 00:12:56,005
Sylvia.
340
00:12:56,074 --> 00:12:57,258
You won't tell anyone, will you?
341
00:12:57,282 --> 00:12:58,282
No. Of course not.
342
00:12:58,351 --> 00:13:00,040
Because I would
die of the humiliation.
343
00:13:00,178 --> 00:13:01,247
I won't tell them.
344
00:13:01,385 --> 00:13:03,145
They'll take the x-rays,
they'll be negative,
345
00:13:03,247 --> 00:13:05,287
I'll limp around a little,
I'll get a little better,
346
00:13:05,385 --> 00:13:07,627
and then it'll be
like our little secret.
347
00:13:07,764 --> 00:13:08,764
I promise.
348
00:13:10,144 --> 00:13:11,213
Thank you.
349
00:13:11,351 --> 00:13:12,351
You're welcome.
350
00:13:12,902 --> 00:13:14,144
You're a good girl.
351
00:13:15,765 --> 00:13:16,765
Thank you.
352
00:13:16,867 --> 00:13:18,489
Maybe I should've given you...
353
00:13:19,420 --> 00:13:21,144
A fairer shake all these years.
354
00:13:22,178 --> 00:13:23,178
Why, Sylvia...
355
00:13:23,247 --> 00:13:24,767
Yeah, yeah, right.
What's done is done.
356
00:13:41,730 --> 00:13:42,834
Boss.
357
00:13:42,972 --> 00:13:44,454
Marvin, what are you doing here?
358
00:13:44,592 --> 00:13:46,672
It's only half an hour until
your Times Square message.
359
00:13:46,696 --> 00:13:48,179
Cassie and I just had a fight.
360
00:13:48,316 --> 00:13:49,765
Cassie? My mother.
361
00:13:50,214 --> 00:13:51,316
Oh, yeah.
362
00:13:51,454 --> 00:13:52,834
A fight? About what?
363
00:13:52,972 --> 00:13:55,110
She got real flirty
with the taxi driver.
364
00:13:55,248 --> 00:13:56,523
I hate when she does that.
365
00:13:56,661 --> 00:13:58,385
Oh. And I told her so.
366
00:13:58,523 --> 00:14:00,323
I said, "how do you
think that makes me feel?"
367
00:14:00,386 --> 00:14:01,696
One thing led to another.
368
00:14:01,834 --> 00:14:03,523
She said she didn't
need this crap.
369
00:14:03,661 --> 00:14:06,041
She got out of the
cab and rushed home.
370
00:14:06,455 --> 00:14:07,455
Wow.
371
00:14:07,523 --> 00:14:08,523
Women.
372
00:14:09,317 --> 00:14:10,317
Yeah, yeah.
373
00:14:10,386 --> 00:14:11,386
They just don't get it.
374
00:14:11,455 --> 00:14:13,421
No. You know what?
They really don't.
375
00:14:14,145 --> 00:14:16,110
But it hurts so much.
376
00:14:16,248 --> 00:14:18,799
Hey, Marvin, we've all
been there, you know?
377
00:14:18,937 --> 00:14:19,937
Well, sort of.
378
00:14:22,041 --> 00:14:23,559
Hey, boss, will
you do me a favor?
379
00:14:23,696 --> 00:14:24,696
Will you talk to her?
380
00:14:24,730 --> 00:14:25,868
What, me?
381
00:14:26,006 --> 00:14:28,662
Yeah. Just tell
her how bad I feel,
382
00:14:28,799 --> 00:14:30,352
and how much I love her.
383
00:14:30,490 --> 00:14:32,179
Ask her if she'll
ever see me again.
384
00:14:32,317 --> 00:14:34,662
Marvin, I don't wanna
meddle in family business.
385
00:14:34,800 --> 00:14:37,145
But I feel so empty without her.
386
00:14:37,835 --> 00:14:40,628
The air's a dusty gray,
387
00:14:40,766 --> 00:14:43,006
food has no taste,
388
00:14:43,145 --> 00:14:46,766
and sleep is just a
shallow, sarcastic illusion.
389
00:14:46,904 --> 00:14:48,524
You haven't even
been to sleep yet.
390
00:14:48,662 --> 00:14:49,697
I'm predicting.
391
00:14:49,835 --> 00:14:52,800
Marvin, I will go,
I will talk to her.
392
00:14:52,938 --> 00:14:54,283
You take care of this, okay?
393
00:14:54,421 --> 00:14:55,524
I will. Okay.
394
00:14:55,662 --> 00:14:56,662
Thank you.
395
00:14:57,697 --> 00:14:59,386
And tell Cassie that I love her.
396
00:14:59,524 --> 00:15:00,524
Cassie?
397
00:15:00,593 --> 00:15:01,697
My mother.
398
00:15:08,524 --> 00:15:09,524
Mom?
399
00:15:10,007 --> 00:15:11,146
Hi. Oh...
400
00:15:11,284 --> 00:15:14,042
All you people,
you walk so quietly.
401
00:15:15,249 --> 00:15:17,421
Wow. Somebody seems
to be feeling a little better.
402
00:15:17,559 --> 00:15:19,662
Ohh... I only wish.
403
00:15:19,800 --> 00:15:23,146
The X-ray girl noticed
that my polish was chipping,
404
00:15:23,284 --> 00:15:24,456
so I fought through the pain.
405
00:15:24,593 --> 00:15:25,973
Oh.
406
00:15:26,111 --> 00:15:28,151
You fought through the
pain to polish your toenails?
407
00:15:28,180 --> 00:15:29,904
What? When a woman's in pain,
408
00:15:30,042 --> 00:15:31,180
she needs to feel pretty.
409
00:15:31,593 --> 00:15:33,697
Yes.
410
00:15:33,835 --> 00:15:35,955
Sylvia, doesn't it hurt
your leg to bend it like that?
411
00:15:36,042 --> 00:15:38,491
Well, I'm obviously in shock.
412
00:15:38,629 --> 00:15:40,146
Wait a minute,
wait a minute, Ma.
413
00:15:40,284 --> 00:15:41,938
Wasn't it the other
leg that you hurt?
414
00:15:42,076 --> 00:15:44,835
Deb, I'm sure Sylvia
knows which leg she hurt.
415
00:15:44,973 --> 00:15:48,146
No, she's right because
when we found you,
416
00:15:48,284 --> 00:15:49,594
you were on your right side.
417
00:15:49,732 --> 00:15:51,212
Remember, you
fell on your right side,
418
00:15:51,249 --> 00:15:52,260
which means you would've
broken the right leg.
419
00:15:52,284 --> 00:15:53,284
You don't know that.
420
00:15:53,422 --> 00:15:54,605
How else would
that have happened?
421
00:15:54,629 --> 00:15:55,629
Maybe she bounced.
422
00:15:58,767 --> 00:16:00,570
She bounced from the left
side over to her right side.
423
00:16:00,594 --> 00:16:01,905
Maybe.
424
00:16:02,042 --> 00:16:03,398
You know, when
you come to think of it,
425
00:16:03,422 --> 00:16:05,732
how did you catapult out
of that chair anyway, mom?
426
00:16:05,870 --> 00:16:06,905
Well, I... Debbie...
427
00:16:07,042 --> 00:16:10,698
Clearly she lost
control of the chair.
428
00:16:10,836 --> 00:16:11,905
Lost control?
429
00:16:12,043 --> 00:16:13,767
What is it, a Lamborghini now?
430
00:16:15,422 --> 00:16:17,353
She lost control of the chair.
431
00:16:17,491 --> 00:16:21,147
She was rocking excitedly,
and she lost control.
432
00:16:21,284 --> 00:16:23,525
She catapulted
herself out of the chair,
433
00:16:23,663 --> 00:16:25,387
and onto the floor,
434
00:16:25,525 --> 00:16:28,387
landing on and severely
injuring her left leg,
435
00:16:28,525 --> 00:16:31,077
whereupon she
apparently bounced,
436
00:16:32,181 --> 00:16:34,147
coming to land
on her right side.
437
00:16:34,767 --> 00:16:36,043
Is that right, Sylvia?
438
00:16:36,181 --> 00:16:37,422
Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh.
439
00:16:38,008 --> 00:16:39,112
See? Yeah.
440
00:16:41,147 --> 00:16:42,216
What?
441
00:16:42,354 --> 00:16:44,354
Nothing. I just find
it hard to believe
442
00:16:44,492 --> 00:16:46,663
that my mother would
just bounce over like that.
443
00:16:47,698 --> 00:16:50,285
My God, my God, my
God. What are you saying?
444
00:16:50,423 --> 00:16:52,801
Are you saying that
she faked an injury?
445
00:16:52,939 --> 00:16:54,595
And why? Just to get attention?
446
00:16:54,732 --> 00:16:55,777
Is that what you're saying?
447
00:16:55,801 --> 00:16:56,801
No, of course not.
448
00:16:56,870 --> 00:16:58,390
Then come on,
apologize to your mother.
449
00:16:58,423 --> 00:16:59,468
No. We weren't saying
anything. Jamie, I...
450
00:16:59,492 --> 00:17:01,905
You both apologize
to your mother.
451
00:17:02,043 --> 00:17:03,630
I'm sorry. Sorry, Mom.
452
00:17:03,767 --> 00:17:05,388
No, really, we were
very thoughtless.
453
00:17:05,526 --> 00:17:07,006
Thoughtless,
thoughtless, thoughtless.
454
00:17:07,077 --> 00:17:09,526
Thank you. Jeez.
455
00:17:09,664 --> 00:17:11,624
I can only hope that my
children have more respect
456
00:17:11,664 --> 00:17:13,261
if I ever injured myself
on Mother's Day...
457
00:17:13,285 --> 00:17:14,457
Jamie... Yeah?
458
00:17:17,423 --> 00:17:19,595
I think I made my point.
459
00:17:19,733 --> 00:17:23,388
Well, Mrs. Buchman, your
fibula and tibia are integrated,
460
00:17:23,526 --> 00:17:24,975
longitudinally aligned,
461
00:17:25,112 --> 00:17:27,526
and still articulating in
concert with your femur.
462
00:17:27,664 --> 00:17:28,664
What?
463
00:17:28,733 --> 00:17:29,802
You're fine.
464
00:17:29,940 --> 00:17:31,526
Isn't that nice?
465
00:17:31,664 --> 00:17:35,388
But considering the pain
that you are clearly in,
466
00:17:35,526 --> 00:17:36,664
something is probably amiss,
467
00:17:36,802 --> 00:17:38,388
and we really should
immobilize the leg.
468
00:17:38,975 --> 00:17:40,182
Immobilize?
469
00:17:40,319 --> 00:17:42,595
The cast should stay
on for six to eight weeks,
470
00:17:42,733 --> 00:17:44,493
and then we'll take it
from there, all right?
471
00:17:44,802 --> 00:17:45,802
Good.
472
00:17:46,388 --> 00:17:47,768
A cast? Really?
473
00:17:47,906 --> 00:17:49,768
This is the price you pay
474
00:17:49,906 --> 00:17:52,044
when you take a horrible spill.
475
00:17:54,595 --> 00:17:55,595
Okay.
476
00:17:55,699 --> 00:17:56,882
In a moment, someone will be in
477
00:17:56,906 --> 00:17:58,146
to wheel you up to orthopedics.
478
00:17:58,217 --> 00:17:59,468
Why don't you guys
meet her up there?
479
00:17:59,492 --> 00:18:00,492
Okay.
480
00:18:00,561 --> 00:18:01,561
Great, fine. Okay, good.
481
00:18:01,699 --> 00:18:03,078
Hold tight, buttercup.
482
00:18:04,286 --> 00:18:05,286
See ya.
483
00:18:06,286 --> 00:18:07,527
What a good Ma.
484
00:18:08,424 --> 00:18:09,424
All right.
485
00:18:13,493 --> 00:18:17,148
I can't believe that I accused
my own mother of faking an injury.
486
00:18:17,286 --> 00:18:18,813
I know, sweetie. We've
all had a tough day.
487
00:18:18,837 --> 00:18:20,733
And on Mother's Day, I... Ohh!!
488
00:18:20,871 --> 00:18:22,044
What?
489
00:18:22,182 --> 00:18:24,054
Now we're gonna miss
your Mother's Day surprise.
490
00:18:24,078 --> 00:18:25,078
Why?
491
00:18:25,148 --> 00:18:26,871
Because it's across town,
492
00:18:27,009 --> 00:18:28,469
and we gotta be
there in just a minute.
493
00:18:28,493 --> 00:18:29,871
Can't we make it if we hurry?
494
00:18:30,009 --> 00:18:32,148
Maybe, but don't you think
we should be here for mom?
495
00:18:33,355 --> 00:18:34,389
I think we can go.
496
00:18:39,941 --> 00:18:40,941
Did you talk to her?
497
00:18:41,009 --> 00:18:42,251
Yes, Marvin, I did.
498
00:18:42,389 --> 00:18:43,389
And?
499
00:18:43,458 --> 00:18:45,458
And she is a very lovely lady.
500
00:18:45,596 --> 00:18:46,596
And? Really lovely.
501
00:18:46,665 --> 00:18:48,803
And I must say,
attractive and youthful.
502
00:18:48,941 --> 00:18:49,941
And?
503
00:18:50,010 --> 00:18:51,527
And I told her what you said.
504
00:18:51,941 --> 00:18:52,941
And?
505
00:18:53,010 --> 00:18:54,320
And she forgives you.
506
00:18:54,458 --> 00:18:55,700
Really? Yes.
507
00:18:56,217 --> 00:18:57,389
Wow.
508
00:18:57,527 --> 00:18:59,114
Thank you, boss, thank you.
509
00:18:59,251 --> 00:19:00,451
No problem. Thank you so much.
510
00:19:00,527 --> 00:19:01,917
Listen, do me a favor,
will you, if you don't mind?
511
00:19:01,941 --> 00:19:04,320
Stick around till closing
and lock up for me.
512
00:19:04,458 --> 00:19:05,458
Why?
513
00:19:05,527 --> 00:19:07,114
Nothing. I got a little date.
514
00:19:09,631 --> 00:19:10,734
With who, Cheryl?
515
00:19:10,872 --> 00:19:12,149
Uh... No.
516
00:19:12,596 --> 00:19:13,596
Molly.
517
00:19:13,734 --> 00:19:14,803
Uh, no.
518
00:19:14,941 --> 00:19:15,941
Rebecca?
519
00:19:16,425 --> 00:19:17,425
No.
520
00:19:18,252 --> 00:19:19,252
Sarah?
521
00:19:19,803 --> 00:19:20,803
No.
522
00:19:22,010 --> 00:19:23,494
Oh, God. Marvin.
523
00:19:24,494 --> 00:19:26,079
You're going on a
date with my mother.
524
00:19:26,769 --> 00:19:27,838
It is not a date.
525
00:19:28,494 --> 00:19:29,734
Where you taking her?
526
00:19:29,872 --> 00:19:31,435
Actually, we were
thinking of staying in.
527
00:19:31,459 --> 00:19:32,494
Baaaa!
528
00:19:39,976 --> 00:19:41,872
What it is, it's
just the tallest,
529
00:19:42,010 --> 00:19:43,838
most elaborate
Mother's Day card ever.
530
00:19:43,976 --> 00:19:44,976
Oops. Sorry.
531
00:19:45,079 --> 00:19:46,597
Just hope we didn't miss it.
532
00:19:49,010 --> 00:19:50,010
Oh...
533
00:19:50,079 --> 00:19:51,735
Maybe it's after this lame one.
534
00:19:53,287 --> 00:19:55,010
"You're some kind of mom."
535
00:19:55,770 --> 00:19:56,986
Bet a light bulb really went off
536
00:19:57,010 --> 00:19:58,010
over that guy's head.
537
00:19:59,701 --> 00:20:00,942
Yeah.
538
00:20:01,079 --> 00:20:02,528
That is lame, huh?
539
00:20:02,666 --> 00:20:04,390
It's not even
clear. What is that?
540
00:20:04,528 --> 00:20:05,666
"Some kind of mom"?
541
00:20:05,804 --> 00:20:07,218
What kind of mom is she, guy?
542
00:20:08,321 --> 00:20:10,161
I don't know if anybody
would be thinking that.
543
00:20:10,804 --> 00:20:12,046
Well... Whatever.
544
00:20:12,183 --> 00:20:13,183
So I guess we missed it.
545
00:20:13,287 --> 00:20:14,425
Oh, honey! What?
546
00:20:14,563 --> 00:20:18,080
"Is there anything purer
than your sweet love
547
00:20:18,219 --> 00:20:21,597
in Earth beneath or sky above?
548
00:20:21,735 --> 00:20:24,115
No sunset has your warmth.
549
00:20:24,804 --> 00:20:26,666
No ocean has your depth.
550
00:20:26,804 --> 00:20:29,184
You hold me when I ache.
551
00:20:29,322 --> 00:20:32,322
You stroke me when I wepth."
552
00:20:35,080 --> 00:20:36,942
Honey, is that your
message to me?
553
00:20:39,115 --> 00:20:40,115
Yes, it is.
554
00:20:52,873 --> 00:20:54,150
You really know me.
555
00:20:55,804 --> 00:20:57,150
If not me, then who?
556
00:21:20,840 --> 00:21:23,219
And then she told me that
she never really loved me.
557
00:21:24,771 --> 00:21:26,598
And then she held
me one more time,
558
00:21:27,840 --> 00:21:30,081
and then she opened
the door, and she just left.
559
00:21:33,151 --> 00:21:35,012
She just walked
right out of my life,
560
00:21:35,151 --> 00:21:37,185
and she's never
coming back again.
561
00:21:39,254 --> 00:21:42,633
And I'm never ever gonna
see your mother ever again.
562
00:21:44,805 --> 00:21:46,185
I-I'm sorry, boss.
563
00:21:46,805 --> 00:21:48,012
I really am.
564
00:21:49,426 --> 00:21:50,426
So...
565
00:21:50,529 --> 00:21:51,598
She's available.
566
00:22:38,047 --> 00:22:40,599
And then she told me that
she never really loved me.
567
00:22:41,944 --> 00:22:43,806
And then she held
me one more time,
568
00:22:45,185 --> 00:22:47,427
and then she opened
the door, and she just left.
569
00:22:50,013 --> 00:22:52,152
She just walked
right out of my life,
570
00:22:52,289 --> 00:22:54,358
and she's never
coming back again.
571
00:22:56,461 --> 00:22:59,979
And I'm never ever gonna
see your mother ever again.
572
00:23:01,841 --> 00:23:03,496
I-I'm sorry, boss.
573
00:23:04,117 --> 00:23:05,530
I really am.
574
00:23:06,772 --> 00:23:07,772
So...
575
00:23:07,841 --> 00:23:08,841
She's available.
39113
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