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1
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KNOCK AT DOOR
2
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Oh, dear. Can I leave a few items
here, Cleggy, just for a short while?
3
00:00:12,880 --> 00:00:19,940
"What kind of items?" says he
suspiciously. Just a few necessities for a picnic. An illicit picnic.
4
00:00:19,940 --> 00:00:22,320
You're sneaking away for a picnic.
5
00:00:22,320 --> 00:00:27,280
I wouldn't say "sneaking".
I know I'm going to regret this,
6
00:00:27,280 --> 00:00:32,000
but all right, bring 'em in. You're
a good lad. You're a life-saver.
7
00:00:37,460 --> 00:00:40,420
How many is this picnic for?!
8
00:00:40,420 --> 00:00:44,760
It was going to be for
the Wildlife Appreciation Society.
9
00:00:44,760 --> 00:00:48,800
And how many wildlife appreciators
would that be, Howard?
10
00:00:48,800 --> 00:00:55,140
Well, at the moment - and I blame
lack of advertising - there's just myself and some young lady.
11
00:00:55,140 --> 00:00:57,460
Well, there's a surprise(!)
12
00:01:06,780 --> 00:01:10,820
I hope you're going by lorry,
Howard. Oh, I can carry these.
13
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They're extremely light and portable.
14
00:01:13,400 --> 00:01:16,160
There's more? Just one more.
15
00:01:22,380 --> 00:01:23,960
Howard!
16
00:01:23,960 --> 00:01:28,680
It's just for a short while.
I don't take up much room.
17
00:01:28,680 --> 00:01:32,840
You'll be amazed at the places
I can curl up in.
18
00:01:35,500 --> 00:01:38,600
Howard, you are dead.
19
00:01:38,600 --> 00:01:41,680
I will be, if Pearl sees her.
20
00:02:19,360 --> 00:02:23,300
"Are you strong, assertive
and a decision-maker?"
21
00:02:26,940 --> 00:02:28,360
Well?
22
00:02:29,440 --> 00:02:33,280
You'd do better
asking him if he's awake.
23
00:02:33,280 --> 00:02:35,900
What came after "strong"?
24
00:02:37,940 --> 00:02:42,580
Are you strong, assertive
and a decision-maker?
25
00:02:43,660 --> 00:02:48,000
Oh, you'd better give him a clue.
We could be here all day.
26
00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:50,400
Is it yes or no?
27
00:02:52,800 --> 00:02:55,660
Is there a "don't know"?
28
00:02:55,660 --> 00:03:01,280
Oh, come on, you two. I'm closing
for an hour. Have you finished?
29
00:03:01,280 --> 00:03:07,260
I'm leaving that decision to him.
I'm building his confidence. He's going to become a decision-maker.
30
00:03:07,260 --> 00:03:10,080
..Ivy's asking have we finished?
31
00:03:11,140 --> 00:03:13,360
Yeah, yeah, we've finished.
32
00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:18,000
You see, when you put your mind to
it. A touch of the Godfather there.
33
00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:21,520
Unless you want another cup of tea.
Don't spoil it!
34
00:03:21,520 --> 00:03:23,880
You've made your decision.
35
00:03:23,880 --> 00:03:27,420
..We've finished.
It's about time. Who's paying?
36
00:03:27,420 --> 00:03:29,540
BOTH: He is.
37
00:03:29,540 --> 00:03:33,720
It's your turn. You made
THAT decision quick enough!
38
00:03:33,720 --> 00:03:36,520
I may have created a monster here.
39
00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:48,380
Howard!
40
00:04:11,300 --> 00:04:13,920
Norman Clegg does Russian dancing!
41
00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:18,440
And with only one leg. Could
one of his legs have gone Russian?
42
00:04:19,620 --> 00:04:21,660
Bog off!
43
00:04:21,660 --> 00:04:24,320
Oh, it's even got a Russian name!
44
00:04:24,320 --> 00:04:28,020
Can he do that bit where they
squat down and kick their legs out?
45
00:04:28,020 --> 00:04:32,200
On one leg? Wouldn't there be
some danger of devaluing his roubles?
46
00:04:33,880 --> 00:04:38,040
I advise you to leave if you can't
stand the sight of human suffering.
47
00:04:38,040 --> 00:04:43,640
Who's suffering? Howard,
when I can catch him. We can stand the sight of Howard suffering.
48
00:04:43,640 --> 00:04:47,880
What's he done to turn your leg
Russian? He stuck me with a problem.
49
00:04:47,880 --> 00:04:52,420
Clegg, problems are there
to be solved. What's your problem?
50
00:04:52,420 --> 00:04:54,960
THAT'S the problem.
51
00:04:59,060 --> 00:05:01,440
You've got a problem.
52
00:05:05,860 --> 00:05:08,380
THUDDING
53
00:05:08,380 --> 00:05:13,480
Don't bang it. It's an awkward
shape. Oh, look who's talking!
54
00:05:14,940 --> 00:05:18,940
It's covered in dust.
How long's it been here?
55
00:05:18,940 --> 00:05:22,980
Oh, it's been here a while.
It's time it earned its keep.
56
00:05:27,400 --> 00:05:31,460
What are you going to do with it?
You haven't got room in the window.
57
00:05:31,460 --> 00:05:37,440
Oh, it's not going in the window.
You're going to wheel it round the town for advertising purposes.
58
00:05:37,440 --> 00:05:40,800
Why do you want to advertise
bad wigs?
59
00:05:40,800 --> 00:05:44,660
It's going to be advertising
my clothing department.
60
00:05:44,660 --> 00:05:51,200
I want the word to get round
that stuff from here can look good, even under a bad wig.
61
00:05:51,200 --> 00:05:55,200
He said it would be all right
to call for him this morning.
62
00:05:55,200 --> 00:06:00,120
He said we'd go for a picnic. He said
Pearl would be at the coffee morning.
63
00:06:00,120 --> 00:06:04,800
Tell her she shouldn't trust
his arrangements. I know that voice.
64
00:06:04,800 --> 00:06:08,440
There's a Norman Clegg here
somewhere!
65
00:06:08,440 --> 00:06:12,360
He lives here.
I suppose that could explain it.
66
00:06:12,360 --> 00:06:14,060
What happened
to the coffee morning?
67
00:06:14,060 --> 00:06:20,660
Pearl's giving the coffee morning.
They're coming to her place. You see? A piece of Howard organisation.
68
00:06:20,660 --> 00:06:23,060
And now, here I am,
69
00:06:23,060 --> 00:06:29,580
alone in this house with three
male persons, on whose good manners I'm going to have to rely.
70
00:06:29,580 --> 00:06:35,220
You can rely on mine, missus.
I'm dedicated to preserving footpaths and innocence.
71
00:06:35,220 --> 00:06:39,260
And I'm still recovering from a nasty
experience with the opposite sex -
72
00:06:39,260 --> 00:06:40,760
marriage.
73
00:06:40,760 --> 00:06:44,420
And I haven't finished
my library book.
74
00:06:44,420 --> 00:06:47,160
It never rains, but it pours.
75
00:06:47,160 --> 00:06:53,380
Well, Howard got you in here.
So I suppose we leave it to Howard to get you out.
76
00:06:53,380 --> 00:06:59,220
I've tried that. I've been ringing
him on the phone, I've been trying to signal him through the window.
77
00:06:59,220 --> 00:07:01,680
He's ignoring his responsibilities.
78
00:07:01,680 --> 00:07:05,220
He can be slippery
in times of crisis.
79
00:07:05,220 --> 00:07:07,500
Tha's going about this all wrong.
80
00:07:07,500 --> 00:07:11,520
While Howard thinks you want to get
rid of the lady, he's not bothered.
81
00:07:11,520 --> 00:07:18,480
He'd come round if he thought
you wanted to keep her. That'd worry him. It'd worry ME a bit.
82
00:07:18,480 --> 00:07:22,180
And I must confess
to a certain nervousness.
83
00:07:22,180 --> 00:07:25,380
And where would you keep me, Norman?
84
00:07:25,380 --> 00:07:28,580
..I don't like it already.
85
00:07:28,580 --> 00:07:30,980
It's a good idea.
86
00:07:30,980 --> 00:07:37,540
It has the sort of deviousness I can
admire as a divorced person. Jealousy would soon bring Howard round.
87
00:07:50,660 --> 00:07:53,240
No, no, no. It's no good lying down.
88
00:07:53,240 --> 00:07:57,120
It wants to be upright.
People can't see it down there.
89
00:07:58,200 --> 00:08:02,160
It looks almost human, doesn't it?
Compared to SOME people.
90
00:08:07,560 --> 00:08:12,020
Much more of this
and we'll be forging a relationship.
91
00:08:16,700 --> 00:08:20,800
Ah, that's better.
A bit of visual impact.
92
00:08:20,800 --> 00:08:25,320
Now, prop that up where people can
be amazed at the value on offer.
93
00:08:32,040 --> 00:08:36,220
Right, off you go, then,
and I'll wait here for the rush.
94
00:08:36,220 --> 00:08:38,160
Right.
95
00:08:50,100 --> 00:08:54,520
If I had half a dozen like them,
I could really organise a disaster.
96
00:08:58,374 --> 00:09:01,134
Ah! Excuse me. Oh, oh!
97
00:09:01,134 --> 00:09:04,134
Good heavens! Where's the fire?
98
00:09:04,134 --> 00:09:06,634
I'm sorry if we startled you.
99
00:09:06,634 --> 00:09:11,074
Leaping out from ambush!
Why would it startle anybody(?)
100
00:09:11,074 --> 00:09:16,414
Could you tell Howard that we'd like
to have a word with him, please?
101
00:09:16,414 --> 00:09:21,834
I think I know the word -
I hear Pearl using it to describe him sometimes.
102
00:09:21,834 --> 00:09:25,854
Could you tell him we have
important information for him?
103
00:09:25,854 --> 00:09:28,914
Something he wouldn't want to miss.
104
00:09:28,914 --> 00:09:32,954
Yes, I've seen him with that
something he wouldn't want to miss.
105
00:09:32,954 --> 00:09:37,554
Of course, he denied it. He said
he just happened to bump into her.
106
00:09:37,554 --> 00:09:42,294
Well, she's got enough padding.
I bet he hardly felt the bump!
107
00:09:45,934 --> 00:09:51,914
Hello, love, come in.
Yes, I think it would be wise. It gets a bit crowded out here.
108
00:09:51,914 --> 00:09:56,014
They're up to something. How can you
say that? We haven't even twitched.
109
00:09:56,014 --> 00:09:58,454
Call it experience.
110
00:09:58,454 --> 00:10:05,094
I haven't twitched. I'm way past
twitch. And it's not something one could lightly do as a policeman.
111
00:10:05,094 --> 00:10:11,354
Well, that's it, then. When they
deny it as convincingly as that, you KNOW they're up to something.
112
00:10:11,354 --> 00:10:15,394
Anyway, for once, mine's not
involved. He's safely indoors.
113
00:10:17,754 --> 00:10:21,194
He's got no right
to be safely indoors.
114
00:10:21,194 --> 00:10:24,694
He ought to be out here
in peril with me.
115
00:10:24,694 --> 00:10:30,914
Stop looking panic-stricken. Tha's
meant to look as if tha's enjoying it. Yes, Clegg, come along, there!
116
00:10:30,914 --> 00:10:34,794
You have to look like a man
who's found a new interest.
117
00:10:34,794 --> 00:10:39,454
Oh, but I have. I'm working
on 45 ways to strangle Howard.
118
00:10:39,454 --> 00:10:45,954
Look, you go back inside. You're
supposed to be interested in Marina. We'll wait for Howard.
119
00:10:45,954 --> 00:10:50,214
Y-Y-You want me to go back inside
with Marina? Alone?
120
00:10:50,214 --> 00:10:53,154
Tha's got to make some effort.
121
00:10:53,154 --> 00:10:57,614
Do you think I could distract her
with food? What do Marinas eat?
122
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I anticipate...you, for starters.
123
00:11:00,694 --> 00:11:02,774
Be brave, Cleggy.
124
00:11:02,774 --> 00:11:05,874
Hold onto a banister or something.
125
00:11:10,014 --> 00:11:12,414
Oh, a little company.
126
00:11:12,414 --> 00:11:14,674
Come in, Norman.
127
00:11:15,734 --> 00:11:18,774
Could I borrow your police whistle?
128
00:11:25,894 --> 00:11:27,674
Psst!
129
00:11:27,674 --> 00:11:32,294
I'm sorry, I can't come out
at the moment. It's impossible.
130
00:11:32,294 --> 00:11:34,834
There's so much to do here.
131
00:11:34,834 --> 00:11:38,194
Suit yourself, Howard.
Tha'll regret it.
132
00:11:38,194 --> 00:11:41,934
Regret what?
Don't say we didn't warn thee.
133
00:11:41,934 --> 00:11:48,174
About what?
Leaving that attractive lady with an old rogue like Norman Clegg.
134
00:11:48,174 --> 00:11:50,374
Killer Clegg. Mister Smooch.
135
00:11:50,374 --> 00:11:56,154
Used to be the hormone king
hereabouts. It's all coming back to him.
136
00:11:56,154 --> 00:12:00,794
Threw us out, didn't he? "This woman
and I want to be alone," he said.
137
00:12:02,854 --> 00:12:05,014
Norman Clegg?!
138
00:12:05,014 --> 00:12:07,514
Oh, that'll be the day!
139
00:12:07,514 --> 00:12:11,134
He goes pale
at the first whiff of perfume!
140
00:12:14,794 --> 00:12:18,974
We seem to have a credibility gap.
We've got to make it more plausible.
141
00:12:46,534 --> 00:12:47,994
Aargh!
142
00:12:54,254 --> 00:12:56,754
You dozy beggar! What, me?!
143
00:12:56,754 --> 00:13:01,214
Wesley, can you help us?
It keeps falling off the cart.
144
00:13:01,214 --> 00:13:07,234
Have you got any ideas how we can
keep it upright? What are you doing with a dozy thing like that?
145
00:13:07,234 --> 00:13:11,354
He pushes the cart.
I don't mean Smiler, I mean this.
146
00:13:11,354 --> 00:13:16,074
We're employing it for advertising
purposes, but it keeps falling off.
147
00:13:16,074 --> 00:13:20,074
It's a terrible-looking dummy.
It grows on you.
148
00:13:20,074 --> 00:13:25,594
Like a boil. What position do you
want it in? Something relaxed.
149
00:13:25,594 --> 00:13:28,934
Trust you.
..HE does a good "relaxed".
150
00:13:28,934 --> 00:13:31,394
Must run in the family.
151
00:13:33,494 --> 00:13:39,714
Billy, take this young lady
into the kitchen and explain the principles of archery to her. Me?!
152
00:13:39,714 --> 00:13:43,994
He's volunteering. I heard it.
But I haven't combed me arrows.
153
00:13:43,994 --> 00:13:48,034
They ought to be washed
and blow-dried. Just do the theory.
154
00:13:48,034 --> 00:13:51,634
The theory of archery.
How interesting.
155
00:13:55,854 --> 00:13:58,314
Get rid of her.
156
00:13:58,314 --> 00:14:02,534
We're working on it. YOU'VE got
to work on it, and convince Howard.
157
00:14:02,534 --> 00:14:08,674
He won't believe it. He will if we
lay it on thick. Get you all dressed up, like dynamite with the ladies.
158
00:14:08,674 --> 00:14:12,774
Dynamite? I'm not sure
I could even light a sparkler.
159
00:14:12,774 --> 00:14:18,494
It depends what we can do with you.
Do with me? What transformation we can make.
160
00:14:18,494 --> 00:14:25,614
What have you got in your wardrobe?
Mothballs. I bet you've got stuff in there you've had since the 1930s.
161
00:14:25,614 --> 00:14:31,614
They may be back in fashion. They
weren't IN when I got them. Look in your wardrobe, I'll check on Billy.
162
00:14:33,634 --> 00:14:36,834
How's it going, Billy? Improvising.
163
00:14:36,834 --> 00:14:41,594
Very interestingly. We were
doing fine until his string broke.
164
00:14:49,194 --> 00:14:52,474
Why are you looking so uneasy,
Barry?
165
00:14:52,474 --> 00:14:57,294
You know I hate giving your mother
a lift. She unnerves me.
166
00:14:57,294 --> 00:14:59,834
It's only as far as Pearl's.
167
00:14:59,834 --> 00:15:03,814
It's not the distance - she can
unnerve me in the first 20 yards!
168
00:15:04,874 --> 00:15:09,654
Be brave. How do you think my father
feels? He has to live with it.
169
00:15:09,654 --> 00:15:15,354
She makes me feel about ten
years old. Oh, you're doing well - I'm still at six.
170
00:15:15,354 --> 00:15:19,914
Even when she's not there, I feel
like she's always there. How's that?
171
00:15:19,914 --> 00:15:24,574
It's an impression that began
when she came on our honeymoon.
172
00:15:24,574 --> 00:15:26,694
Oh, Barry, she only visited.
173
00:15:26,694 --> 00:15:32,654
I just wish she hadn't brought
flowers and that list of numbers for you to call in an emergency.
174
00:15:41,414 --> 00:15:47,114
You realise
I could be tugged powerfully towards the first pot of jam.
175
00:15:47,114 --> 00:15:52,474
That's it. That's just the effect
people strive for. That's fashion.
176
00:15:52,474 --> 00:15:56,334
I think it's sad that gentlemen
stopped wearing tights.
177
00:15:56,334 --> 00:15:58,454
These legs were born for tights.
178
00:16:00,774 --> 00:16:02,554
Help!
179
00:16:02,554 --> 00:16:07,114
This message comes to you
from the bottom of my thorax.
180
00:16:07,114 --> 00:16:11,094
Looking good, Clegg.
..What do we say, troops? Gradely.
181
00:16:12,134 --> 00:16:14,734
Like it. Love the cut.
182
00:16:14,734 --> 00:16:17,374
I think I'll start with my throat.
183
00:16:17,374 --> 00:16:19,754
Gives you an intellectual look.
184
00:16:19,754 --> 00:16:23,854
Oh, that's a pity, because
what we're after is "male bimbo".
185
00:16:23,854 --> 00:16:26,414
Dim, but desirable.
186
00:16:26,414 --> 00:16:28,934
I could do "dim".
187
00:16:28,934 --> 00:16:35,774
It's the hair. It's the only bit
that's ME! What's wrong with the hair? There's not enough of it.
188
00:16:35,774 --> 00:16:38,034
Perhaps I can be of help.
189
00:16:38,034 --> 00:16:41,814
I always carry a few spares,
in case of emergency.
190
00:16:51,794 --> 00:16:55,834
You're going the wrong way, Barry.
It's the quickest way to Pearl's.
191
00:16:55,834 --> 00:16:59,974
I know it is, but I want
to call on Wesley at the shed.
192
00:16:59,974 --> 00:17:02,274
But I didn't know that.
193
00:17:02,274 --> 00:17:06,234
You're going the wrong way, Barry.
I am. I'm going the wrong way.
194
00:17:12,514 --> 00:17:16,994
This car goes backwards easier
than mine. Mine only goes in jerks.
195
00:17:16,994 --> 00:17:20,734
It's your father -
he over-tightens everything.
196
00:17:22,714 --> 00:17:27,454
Your Barry's looking quite well.
He is well, Mother. My Barry's fine.
197
00:17:27,454 --> 00:17:29,874
Yes, he looks healthy enough.
198
00:17:29,874 --> 00:17:33,914
Just a bit guilty. Guilty?!
What have I got to be guilty about?
199
00:17:33,914 --> 00:17:38,034
Yes, I was wondering about that.
Mother! You make him nervous.
200
00:17:38,034 --> 00:17:42,574
There you are - guilty.
I'm happily married. At home.
201
00:17:42,574 --> 00:17:47,774
What about all those other women
in your office? Oh, Barry! Oh, don't YOU start.
202
00:17:47,774 --> 00:17:49,994
I never look at another woman.
203
00:17:54,274 --> 00:17:58,294
No, that's one worry I've never had
with your father - other women.
204
00:17:58,294 --> 00:18:01,294
I know he'd come home smelling nicer,
205
00:18:01,294 --> 00:18:03,834
but I'll settle for diesel.
206
00:18:03,834 --> 00:18:07,414
No,
he's got no interest in other women.
207
00:18:11,074 --> 00:18:14,054
Wesley!
What are you doing with that woman?
208
00:18:23,014 --> 00:18:29,154
Well, come along, you dream machine,
you. You're never going to make Howard twitchy if he doesn't see you.
209
00:18:29,154 --> 00:18:33,194
You know what I think is awful
about life? People see you.
210
00:18:33,194 --> 00:18:36,434
You look terrific, Cleggy.
A real smoothie.
211
00:18:36,434 --> 00:18:39,894
I'd worry
if you were near MY missus.
212
00:18:39,894 --> 00:18:45,854
I don't know, though. When can you
come round? Don't get him going - he's nervous enough.
213
00:18:50,714 --> 00:18:55,394
If anyone asks,
I am a visitor from outer space.
214
00:18:55,394 --> 00:18:59,714
I am from a planet
famous for bad tailoring.
215
00:18:59,714 --> 00:19:04,094
Think positively. You are really
menacing to the opposite sex.
216
00:19:04,094 --> 00:19:10,034
Knock on Howard's door.
What am I going to tell Howard when he comes to the door?
217
00:19:10,034 --> 00:19:14,094
You tell him there's no hurry to take
Marina back. Sounds plausible, to me.
218
00:19:14,094 --> 00:19:20,454
You tell him you enjoy entertaining
Marina. That'll throw him in a panic. Does a good panic, does Howard.
219
00:19:20,454 --> 00:19:23,254
It'll all go wrong.
220
00:19:23,254 --> 00:19:29,254
It won't go wrong if you look
a bit happier about things. You want to get rid of her, don't you?
221
00:19:29,254 --> 00:19:31,974
Well, this is your quickest way.
222
00:19:38,934 --> 00:19:40,994
Go on.
223
00:19:40,994 --> 00:19:45,334
Big smile.
Big, cheesy, man-of-the-world smile.
224
00:19:58,134 --> 00:20:01,034
Norman Clegg! Tut-tut!
225
00:20:01,034 --> 00:20:05,554
Struck down in his prime
by a bad hairpiece.
226
00:20:08,774 --> 00:20:10,694
Norman Clegg?
227
00:20:10,694 --> 00:20:13,754
He's still in here somewhere.
228
00:20:13,754 --> 00:20:17,574
I thought, "Ooh, hello,
it's the phantom of the opera!"
229
00:20:17,574 --> 00:20:20,134
It's a bit showbiz for you, Norman.
230
00:20:20,134 --> 00:20:22,614
Bit showbiz for anybody.
231
00:20:22,614 --> 00:20:28,274
I understand you have a FAULT
in the house. Could I have a word with him, please?
232
00:20:28,274 --> 00:20:32,714
Howard! There's a vision
at the front door wants to see you.
233
00:20:32,714 --> 00:20:37,194
There's a woman behind it -
there HAS to be a woman behind it.
234
00:20:37,194 --> 00:20:40,994
She'll be a long way behind,
if I know Norman Clegg.
235
00:20:40,994 --> 00:20:47,174
Er, you called, Petal?
This male model would like a word with you.
236
00:20:48,494 --> 00:20:50,534
Norman Clegg?
237
00:20:53,814 --> 00:20:55,874
Killer Clegg.
238
00:20:55,874 --> 00:21:00,314
Lady-killer Clegg.
Hormones on the hoof.
239
00:21:00,314 --> 00:21:04,754
I have to inform you that
Marina and I are hitting it off.
240
00:21:04,754 --> 00:21:08,994
Early collection
of the lady will not be required.
241
00:21:10,854 --> 00:21:13,534
Give over! You?!
242
00:21:15,894 --> 00:21:20,914
I've never seen
a bigger butterfingers when it comes to the ladies.
243
00:21:25,374 --> 00:21:27,274
Go on! Go on!
244
00:21:35,374 --> 00:21:37,474
Is that Norman Clegg?
245
00:21:39,854 --> 00:21:42,754
What's that growing on his head?
246
00:21:43,874 --> 00:21:47,974
Now, take that thing away.
It's been nothing but trouble.
247
00:21:47,974 --> 00:21:53,974
Surely your missus can't give you
a hard time for being involved with a dummy? You want to bet?
248
00:21:53,974 --> 00:21:56,754
He doesn't know. He's never married.
249
00:21:56,754 --> 00:22:01,194
I've been nearly married on several
occasions. Just like his father.
250
00:22:03,074 --> 00:22:07,834
Anyway, listen at you. I thought you
were missing female companionship.
251
00:22:07,834 --> 00:22:11,834
That's mostly what you miss -
having to be on your guard.
252
00:22:11,834 --> 00:22:15,454
The steady undercurrent
of potential conflict.
253
00:22:15,454 --> 00:22:18,034
Isn't love grand?
254
00:22:25,714 --> 00:22:30,934
SLURRED: That's the w-w-worst
dummy I've ever seen in me life.
255
00:22:30,934 --> 00:22:33,534
Both of 'em.
256
00:22:33,534 --> 00:22:35,014
Cheers.
257
00:22:58,814 --> 00:23:05,214
Why don't you go out and play?
You know I'd rather be at home with you.
258
00:23:05,214 --> 00:23:07,934
Who did we do yesterday?
259
00:23:07,934 --> 00:23:10,634
Whose turn is it today?
260
00:23:10,634 --> 00:23:14,034
The blonde from Upperthong
was in again.
261
00:23:14,034 --> 00:23:17,854
Who was she with this time?
Same one.
262
00:23:17,854 --> 00:23:20,934
He's lasted longer than the others.
263
00:23:20,934 --> 00:23:23,694
Who's this, then? You know her.
264
00:23:23,694 --> 00:23:25,954
She's the one from...
265
00:23:35,534 --> 00:23:37,394
Psst! Psst!
266
00:23:43,194 --> 00:23:47,454
Why don't you go outside?
And miss all this?
267
00:23:54,854 --> 00:23:57,514
Little crackpot - he's ignoring us.
268
00:23:59,974 --> 00:24:05,974
We'll never get him out.
If he can stay inside with that lot, he's past being moved. That's true.
269
00:24:05,974 --> 00:24:08,334
The man must be desperate.
270
00:24:08,334 --> 00:24:10,774
Hey up...
271
00:24:10,774 --> 00:24:13,034
Who's he?
272
00:24:14,494 --> 00:24:16,614
It's a dummy.
273
00:24:16,614 --> 00:24:19,274
Oh, it's ME that's the dummy.
274
00:24:19,274 --> 00:24:24,294
Why don't we swap Marina for the
dummy and they can wheel Marina away?
275
00:24:25,294 --> 00:24:27,794
The man's a genius!
276
00:24:34,914 --> 00:24:38,934
You two look as if you could do
with a little refreshment.
277
00:24:38,934 --> 00:24:41,214
I always look like that.
278
00:24:41,214 --> 00:24:43,774
We can't leave this thing out here.
279
00:24:43,774 --> 00:24:46,594
Oh, well, you can bring it inside.
280
00:24:46,594 --> 00:24:50,614
I could murder a sandwich.
Your father always could.
281
00:24:50,614 --> 00:24:53,054
It can be arranged.
282
00:25:04,074 --> 00:25:08,654
She's only 30. Really? For goodness'
sake, I don't believe that.
283
00:25:10,134 --> 00:25:15,154
Why doesn't he go away?
I don't know why he won't go away. He's still there.
284
00:25:18,154 --> 00:25:23,034
I don't know where you'll be wheeling
me, but I hope I'll be entirely safe.
285
00:25:23,034 --> 00:25:26,854
Oh, you'll be all right.
Smiler'll be your chaperone.
286
00:25:26,854 --> 00:25:29,594
Always a snag.
287
00:25:49,074 --> 00:25:53,294
There you are, then. Not quite.
There's just one more thing.
288
00:25:53,294 --> 00:25:58,874
What's that?
I've got a little surprise I want to leave for that Howard.
289
00:26:09,934 --> 00:26:12,614
Hey, it gets worse!
290
00:26:12,614 --> 00:26:14,614
It does.
291
00:26:42,294 --> 00:26:44,794
KNOCK AT DOOR
292
00:26:59,014 --> 00:27:01,634
You're not going already?
293
00:27:01,634 --> 00:27:06,514
No point in stopping - eavesdroppers
everywhere. I could make sandwiches.
294
00:27:06,514 --> 00:27:10,554
They're no good with sandwiches.
They leave thumbprints.
295
00:27:10,554 --> 00:27:14,574
My Barry's quite good
with a baguette. Close your handbag.
296
00:27:15,694 --> 00:27:21,234
The crusts are so hard
on those foreign loaves, the crumbs fly everywhere.
297
00:27:21,234 --> 00:27:24,774
I'd be terrified
of wounding a customer.
298
00:27:24,774 --> 00:27:30,794
Some of the things I've heard
you say to your customers, I expect they're used to being wounded.
299
00:27:30,794 --> 00:27:34,634
To run a decent place,
you need discipline.
300
00:28:20,774 --> 00:28:24,174
Get her off! Get her off!
301
00:28:39,734 --> 00:28:44,534
Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
302
00:28:44,584 --> 00:28:49,134
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