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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,880 --> 00:00:06,924 Good evening. I'm Randall Park. 2 00:00:07,007 --> 00:00:08,425 As Election Day draws closer, 3 00:00:08,508 --> 00:00:10,093 we caught up with Candidate Johnson 4 00:00:10,177 --> 00:00:12,304 and asked him how he was feeling. 5 00:00:12,387 --> 00:00:15,265 Cautiously optimistic but still confident that 6 00:00:15,349 --> 00:00:16,975 the American people believe in our message. 7 00:00:17,059 --> 00:00:18,727 Big day's almost here, Randall. 8 00:00:18,810 --> 00:00:19,770 I can taste it. 9 00:00:19,853 --> 00:00:21,104 And, uh, what's it taste like? 10 00:00:21,188 --> 00:00:22,606 Almost as good as this tequila. 11 00:00:22,689 --> 00:00:23,732 Almost. 12 00:00:23,815 --> 00:00:25,108 Probably also almost as good 13 00:00:25,192 --> 00:00:26,610 as this hard pear cider. 14 00:00:26,693 --> 00:00:28,904 That's been expired for easily over a year. 15 00:00:30,197 --> 00:00:31,240 We save it for the cat. 16 00:00:31,323 --> 00:00:33,617 Really? 17 00:00:33,700 --> 00:00:35,953 - So the race is tight. - Mm-hmm. 18 00:00:36,036 --> 00:00:37,955 No one can predict which way it's going to go. 19 00:00:38,038 --> 00:00:39,998 Would you consider this accomplishment a win, 20 00:00:40,082 --> 00:00:41,250 no matter the outcome? 21 00:00:41,333 --> 00:00:43,043 No way, no way. 22 00:00:43,126 --> 00:00:45,170 There's that legendary competitive fire. 23 00:00:45,254 --> 00:00:47,297 I try to do anything like I do everything, 24 00:00:47,381 --> 00:00:48,590 and that's with all I got. 25 00:00:48,674 --> 00:00:50,300 And you can work hard, but sometimes 26 00:00:50,384 --> 00:00:52,302 there are variables you just can't control. 27 00:00:52,386 --> 00:00:53,470 Of course you're referring to 28 00:00:53,553 --> 00:00:55,347 not being cast as Pedro Cerrano 29 00:00:55,430 --> 00:00:56,765 in Lin-Manuel Miranda's 30 00:00:56,848 --> 00:00:58,767 musical remake of "Major League." 31 00:00:58,850 --> 00:00:59,810 No, not talking about that. 32 00:00:59,893 --> 00:01:01,353 But that one did sting. 33 00:01:01,436 --> 00:01:02,813 I'm talking about playing college football 34 00:01:02,896 --> 00:01:04,815 in the early '90s at the University of Miami, 35 00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:07,693 when I had big dreams of playing in the NFL, 36 00:01:07,776 --> 00:01:09,987 and giving my family a better life. 37 00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:11,321 All right, folks, our coverage 38 00:01:11,405 --> 00:01:14,324 of the 1995 NFL Draft continues now. 39 00:01:14,408 --> 00:01:15,993 Let's talk to the man of the hour, 40 00:01:16,076 --> 00:01:17,828 Dwayne "Ladybird" Johnson. 41 00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:19,329 Dwayne, how's it feel 42 00:01:19,413 --> 00:01:21,581 to be the first pick in the NFL Draft? 43 00:01:21,665 --> 00:01:23,542 I'm proof dreams do come true, 44 00:01:23,625 --> 00:01:26,378 and a few years ago, I made a promise. 45 00:01:26,461 --> 00:01:29,464 I bought my parents a mansion. 46 00:01:29,548 --> 00:01:31,800 I don't believe it. 47 00:01:31,883 --> 00:01:33,510 Dwayne... 48 00:01:33,593 --> 00:01:34,678 Dwayne. 49 00:01:34,761 --> 00:01:36,471 Dwayne! 50 00:01:36,555 --> 00:01:37,681 Dwayne. 51 00:01:37,764 --> 00:01:39,850 You all right? 52 00:01:39,933 --> 00:01:41,018 Yeah. 53 00:01:41,101 --> 00:01:43,312 - What up, Kev? - You were asleep. 54 00:01:43,395 --> 00:01:45,355 Yeah, I been working hard in camp. 55 00:01:45,439 --> 00:01:47,024 Going after that starting spot. 56 00:01:47,107 --> 00:01:49,192 Just need to power my body down for a minute. 57 00:01:49,276 --> 00:01:50,235 Micro naps. 58 00:01:50,319 --> 00:01:52,237 Love those. Check it. 59 00:01:54,906 --> 00:01:55,824 Boom. 60 00:01:55,907 --> 00:01:56,908 Refreshed. 61 00:01:56,992 --> 00:01:58,035 Yo, yo, yo, what up? 62 00:01:58,118 --> 00:01:59,536 My dogs, my dogs, my dogs. 63 00:01:59,619 --> 00:02:01,288 Gushers? Gushers, baby? Gushers? 64 00:02:01,371 --> 00:02:02,372 Ow! 65 00:02:02,456 --> 00:02:04,082 - Sapp top. - Hey, yo, Sapp. 66 00:02:04,166 --> 00:02:05,625 This is the D-line room. 67 00:02:05,709 --> 00:02:07,044 I think your tight end meeting's 68 00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:08,712 at The Old Spaghetti Factory. 69 00:02:10,297 --> 00:02:12,049 Spaghetti sounds good right now, but no, 70 00:02:12,132 --> 00:02:13,592 I'm in the right place. 71 00:02:13,675 --> 00:02:15,761 Coach said he wanted to convert me to D-line. 72 00:02:15,844 --> 00:02:17,012 So watch out. 73 00:02:17,095 --> 00:02:19,056 I'm here for your job. 74 00:02:19,139 --> 00:02:21,058 Okay, okay. 75 00:02:21,141 --> 00:02:23,477 My acid reflux is bananas today. 76 00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:26,063 I'll try not to take it out on you, okay? 77 00:02:26,146 --> 00:02:28,106 Even though Sapp was an insanely talented 78 00:02:28,190 --> 00:02:29,733 football player, I was determined 79 00:02:29,816 --> 00:02:31,902 to show Coach Erickson I still had what it took 80 00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:33,236 to be a starter. 81 00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:34,363 First, camp's wrapping up in a few days, 82 00:02:34,446 --> 00:02:35,572 so it's make or break for a lot of you 83 00:02:35,655 --> 00:02:37,115 battling for starter spots. 84 00:02:37,199 --> 00:02:39,576 We got a championship-caliber team this year 85 00:02:39,659 --> 00:02:40,911 and D-line's gonna lead the way. 86 00:02:40,994 --> 00:02:43,663 - Yes, sir. - Second, sports agents. 87 00:02:43,747 --> 00:02:45,665 Now, these jokers are lurking around, 88 00:02:45,749 --> 00:02:46,917 trying to wine and dine some of you. 89 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:48,919 Where? Here I am. 90 00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:50,921 It's illegal, so use your brains. 91 00:02:51,004 --> 00:02:53,382 Avoid these guys, and don't accept any of their gifts. 92 00:02:53,465 --> 00:02:56,093 - Is a car technically a gift? - Yes. 93 00:02:56,176 --> 00:02:57,260 What if it's a Honda Civic? 94 00:02:57,344 --> 00:02:58,804 It's still a gift. Moving on. 95 00:02:58,887 --> 00:03:00,430 - What about a sandwich? - What about it? 96 00:03:00,514 --> 00:03:02,516 Is it a gift? Technically? 97 00:03:02,599 --> 00:03:04,378 If it's bought for you by an agent, then yes, it's a gift. 98 00:03:04,456 --> 00:03:05,769 What about a panini? 99 00:03:05,852 --> 00:03:07,604 All sandwiches bought by agents are gifts. 100 00:03:07,687 --> 00:03:08,897 Would you consider a hot dog a sandwich? 101 00:03:08,980 --> 00:03:09,940 Damn it, yes! 102 00:03:10,023 --> 00:03:11,274 See, I disagree. 103 00:03:11,358 --> 00:03:12,901 Moving on. Get out your playbooks. 104 00:03:12,984 --> 00:03:14,611 Let's talk game strategy. 105 00:03:21,243 --> 00:03:22,494 I forgot mines. 106 00:03:22,577 --> 00:03:24,413 It's cool if we share? 107 00:03:24,496 --> 00:03:26,832 Come on, dog. You hoggin'. 108 00:03:26,915 --> 00:03:28,583 Sapp was one of the best athletes 109 00:03:28,667 --> 00:03:30,460 Miami Football had ever seen. 110 00:03:30,544 --> 00:03:32,129 But this was my year, 111 00:03:32,212 --> 00:03:33,922 and I knew I had nothing to worry about. 112 00:03:54,526 --> 00:03:56,445 Yo, I'm not even tired out here! 113 00:04:00,449 --> 00:04:02,784 I'm sweating Cool Water Cologne, baby. 114 00:04:02,868 --> 00:04:03,827 Sapp, baby! 115 00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:05,662 Whoo-hoo-hoo, Sapp! 116 00:04:05,745 --> 00:04:07,971 So, yeah. Obviously, I was wrong. 117 00:04:08,041 --> 00:04:10,041 - Subs by kinglouisxx - for www.addic7ed.com 118 00:04:10,125 --> 00:04:11,460 Okay, listen up. 119 00:04:11,543 --> 00:04:12,669 Uh, first of all, 120 00:04:12,752 --> 00:04:14,838 whoever recommended Zantac for my heartburn, 121 00:04:14,921 --> 00:04:16,965 thank you. Honestly, life-changing. 122 00:04:17,048 --> 00:04:18,508 You're welcome, Coach. 123 00:04:18,592 --> 00:04:20,677 Second, season starts in a week, 124 00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:22,012 and the coaches have made their decisions 125 00:04:22,095 --> 00:04:24,014 on our first string defense. 126 00:04:24,097 --> 00:04:25,640 I know how hard you all worked in the off-season, 127 00:04:25,724 --> 00:04:27,642 and I'm proud of you, okay? 128 00:04:27,726 --> 00:04:29,561 Each and every one of you. 129 00:04:29,644 --> 00:04:32,355 Okay, starting D-line will be... 130 00:04:32,439 --> 00:04:33,648 Madearis, 131 00:04:33,732 --> 00:04:34,691 Patrick, 132 00:04:34,774 --> 00:04:36,193 Miller, 133 00:04:36,276 --> 00:04:37,402 and Sapp. 134 00:04:37,486 --> 00:04:38,528 All right. 135 00:04:38,612 --> 00:04:41,156 Was there ever a doubt about this? 136 00:04:41,239 --> 00:04:42,532 Hey, you guys all earned it. 137 00:04:42,616 --> 00:04:44,409 But remember, anything can happen, okay? 138 00:04:44,493 --> 00:04:45,508 You need to go out there each week, 139 00:04:45,594 --> 00:04:46,828 and you need to fight for it. 140 00:04:46,912 --> 00:04:49,789 Okay, starting corners will be... 141 00:04:58,131 --> 00:04:59,549 Yes, that's right. It's a six-day, 142 00:04:59,633 --> 00:05:01,843 seven-night cruise around the Keys. 143 00:05:01,927 --> 00:05:03,720 Of course that's all included. 144 00:05:05,805 --> 00:05:07,432 Sure, I'm happy to walk you through 145 00:05:07,516 --> 00:05:08,600 those family packages again. 146 00:05:08,683 --> 00:05:11,895 Just let me place you on a brief hold. 147 00:05:14,481 --> 00:05:16,358 They're still winning, 40 to 3. 148 00:05:16,441 --> 00:05:17,776 Why is the Miami mascot 149 00:05:17,859 --> 00:05:19,402 like a duck with no pants? 150 00:05:19,486 --> 00:05:20,612 Has Dewey played yet? 151 00:05:20,695 --> 00:05:22,906 Not yet, but we saw him on the sidelines. 152 00:05:22,989 --> 00:05:24,533 Best looking kid on the bench. 153 00:05:24,616 --> 00:05:25,408 Look, I'm stuck at work. 154 00:05:25,492 --> 00:05:26,743 I can't make it home in time 155 00:05:26,826 --> 00:05:27,911 before the end of the game, so just make sure 156 00:05:27,994 --> 00:05:28,912 you tape the whole thing. 157 00:05:28,995 --> 00:05:29,955 I always do. 158 00:05:30,038 --> 00:05:31,331 The whole thing, Rocky. 159 00:05:31,414 --> 00:05:32,791 Sometimes the band members get knocked down 160 00:05:32,874 --> 00:05:34,793 by celebrating players, and I think that's really funny. 161 00:05:34,876 --> 00:05:36,878 Yes, I will tape the whole thing. 162 00:05:38,964 --> 00:05:40,423 So for our family packages... 163 00:05:40,507 --> 00:05:41,967 Oh! 164 00:05:42,050 --> 00:05:44,469 That's a bad man! 165 00:05:44,553 --> 00:05:46,429 In on the tackle back at the 42, 166 00:05:46,513 --> 00:05:47,973 Mr. Sapp, Mr. Reilly. 167 00:05:48,515 --> 00:05:50,600 I might not have gotten the starting job, 168 00:05:50,684 --> 00:05:51,935 but I tried to stay motivated 169 00:05:52,018 --> 00:05:53,770 and tried to stay ready. 170 00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:02,821 But I didn't get my number called as much as I'd hoped. 171 00:06:02,904 --> 00:06:06,491 Late in the fourth quarter, Miami 22, Nebraska 0. 172 00:06:06,575 --> 00:06:08,285 And before you knew it, 173 00:06:08,368 --> 00:06:09,953 we were playing for the national championship. 174 00:06:10,036 --> 00:06:11,746 The Hurricanes are four minutes away 175 00:06:11,830 --> 00:06:13,331 from being national champions. 176 00:06:17,711 --> 00:06:19,838 That's what's up! That's what's up! 177 00:06:21,548 --> 00:06:23,508 Dewey hasn't played a single snap yet. 178 00:06:23,592 --> 00:06:25,927 Well, at least his uniform is nice and clean. 179 00:06:26,011 --> 00:06:27,721 Saves someone in the locker room a wash. 180 00:06:27,804 --> 00:06:29,973 Miami mascot is a mess. 181 00:06:30,056 --> 00:06:31,850 Oh, the other mascot. 182 00:06:31,933 --> 00:06:33,476 Nice cowboy. 183 00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:34,811 Handsome. 184 00:06:34,894 --> 00:06:36,396 Like Lee Marvin. 185 00:06:37,522 --> 00:06:38,982 Okay, Dwayne, let's go. You're in, 186 00:06:39,065 --> 00:06:41,651 Yes, Coach. 187 00:06:41,735 --> 00:06:43,987 This is it! 188 00:06:44,070 --> 00:06:45,947 Fourth down. 189 00:06:48,742 --> 00:06:50,327 That was it? 190 00:06:51,911 --> 00:06:53,079 It was so exciting to see you 191 00:06:53,163 --> 00:06:54,706 win the championship, Dewey. 192 00:06:54,789 --> 00:06:56,499 Did you see those band members get knocked down? 193 00:06:56,583 --> 00:06:59,085 The boy with the tuba just kept rolling. 194 00:06:59,169 --> 00:07:00,503 I'm sorry you drove all the way out here 195 00:07:00,587 --> 00:07:02,704 just to see me get in for only one play. 196 00:07:02,782 --> 00:07:04,382 A great play, my favorite play. 197 00:07:04,466 --> 00:07:06,801 And I can't wait to see your championship ring. 198 00:07:06,885 --> 00:07:08,970 A man needs jewelry with a story. 199 00:07:09,054 --> 00:07:10,347 Yes, Peter used to always talk 200 00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:13,141 about the earring he got from Sean Connery. 201 00:07:13,224 --> 00:07:15,852 - Mm-hmm. - Here you go. 202 00:07:15,935 --> 00:07:17,145 Oh, uh, um... 203 00:07:17,228 --> 00:07:21,024 we have a coupon for half-off appetizers. 204 00:07:21,107 --> 00:07:23,693 It's at your Tampa location, but I called ahead. 205 00:07:23,777 --> 00:07:25,737 They said it's still in-state, so they'd accept it. 206 00:07:25,820 --> 00:07:27,238 Oh, okay. 207 00:07:27,322 --> 00:07:30,241 And we'll split the rest over these two cards here. 208 00:07:30,325 --> 00:07:32,202 Oh, oh, sorry. 209 00:07:32,285 --> 00:07:34,037 And I have one for a complimentary dessert. 210 00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:35,246 So whenever you're ready, 211 00:07:35,330 --> 00:07:37,207 we'll take an "Oreo Mess." 212 00:07:38,500 --> 00:07:39,459 Hey, thanks for dinner. 213 00:07:39,542 --> 00:07:41,086 Next year, it's gonna be my treat. 214 00:07:41,169 --> 00:07:42,671 We're so proud of you, Dewey. 215 00:07:44,589 --> 00:07:46,549 We are a family of champions. 216 00:07:46,633 --> 00:07:48,218 Yes, we are. 217 00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:50,345 I'm gonna work my ass off all summer. 218 00:07:50,428 --> 00:07:52,263 Next year, I'm gonna dominate. 219 00:07:52,347 --> 00:07:54,933 From there, it's a straight path to the NFL. 220 00:07:55,016 --> 00:07:57,852 Nobody's gonna outwork me. 221 00:07:57,936 --> 00:07:59,562 Your "Mess." 222 00:07:59,646 --> 00:08:01,606 All right. 223 00:08:03,024 --> 00:08:04,901 What... whoa, whoa. What y'all doing? 224 00:08:04,984 --> 00:08:06,736 Just... 225 00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:10,115 That summer, I took my training to the next level. 226 00:08:17,372 --> 00:08:21,042 I've said before that the gym has always been my sanctuary. 227 00:08:21,126 --> 00:08:22,585 Well, that summer, it was my church, 228 00:08:22,669 --> 00:08:23,878 my alter to sweat, 229 00:08:23,962 --> 00:08:24,921 - my... - Yo. 230 00:08:25,004 --> 00:08:26,756 You done with this machine yet? 231 00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:29,134 You see my towels are still there, right? 232 00:08:29,217 --> 00:08:31,594 My basilica of grime. 233 00:08:31,678 --> 00:08:34,139 It was my workshop, and I was its Build-A-Bear. 234 00:08:34,222 --> 00:08:35,598 Is there a better time that I could call... 235 00:08:35,682 --> 00:08:37,058 As hard as I trained, 236 00:08:37,142 --> 00:08:38,268 the toughest part of that summer 237 00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:40,395 was when my mom got me a job at her work 238 00:08:40,478 --> 00:08:41,771 so I could help out with the bills. 239 00:08:41,855 --> 00:08:44,983 It's five months in Cabo, all expenses included. 240 00:08:47,861 --> 00:08:48,945 Whoops! 241 00:08:49,028 --> 00:08:50,572 Sorry about that, my ear got too sweaty. 242 00:08:50,655 --> 00:08:54,117 Uh, as well as free T-shirts from The Giggling Marlin. 243 00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:56,286 I hated seeing my mom in that place. 244 00:08:56,369 --> 00:08:58,455 It was 100 degrees, no AC, 245 00:08:58,538 --> 00:09:00,498 and you only got paid in commissions. 246 00:09:00,582 --> 00:09:01,666 It made me double down on 247 00:09:01,750 --> 00:09:03,460 my promise to get her out of there, 248 00:09:03,543 --> 00:09:06,629 even if I had to adjust my expectations slightly. 249 00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:07,630 All right, folks, 250 00:09:07,714 --> 00:09:09,841 our coverage of the 1995 NFL Draft 251 00:09:09,924 --> 00:09:11,593 continues now. 252 00:09:11,676 --> 00:09:13,344 We go to the 25th pick, 253 00:09:13,428 --> 00:09:16,473 Dwayne "My Real Name Is Karen" Johnson. 254 00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:17,640 If you don't get the reference, 255 00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:20,143 that's Whoopi Goldberg's birth name. 256 00:09:20,226 --> 00:09:22,854 - Okay, over to you. - Thanks, Chris. 257 00:09:22,937 --> 00:09:25,982 Dwayne, how does it feel to be the 25th pick in the NFL Draft? 258 00:09:26,065 --> 00:09:27,442 Well, it feels great. 259 00:09:27,525 --> 00:09:28,985 I'm gonna haunt the dreams of the 24 teams 260 00:09:29,068 --> 00:09:30,779 that passed on me but... 261 00:09:30,862 --> 00:09:32,489 oh, and one more thing. 262 00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:35,325 I bought my parents a tasteful, ranch-style home. 263 00:09:35,408 --> 00:09:37,494 Perfect, no stairs. 264 00:09:37,577 --> 00:09:39,037 Horizontal livin'. 265 00:09:39,537 --> 00:09:42,749 By the end of the summer, I was ready to roll. 266 00:09:42,832 --> 00:09:44,834 I was gonna take that intensity back to Miami 267 00:09:44,918 --> 00:09:47,295 and be the first guy in the gym every morning. 268 00:09:54,427 --> 00:09:57,722 I was taking command of my future. 269 00:09:59,974 --> 00:10:01,351 But, like I said, 270 00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:04,854 sometimes there are variables you can't control. 271 00:10:04,938 --> 00:10:07,857 Hey. 272 00:10:12,111 --> 00:10:13,988 Yo, Dwayne Johnson. D-line. 273 00:10:14,072 --> 00:10:15,573 Ray Lewis. 274 00:10:15,657 --> 00:10:17,075 Freshman linebacker. 275 00:10:25,792 --> 00:10:27,710 I thought I'd be the first person here at 5:00 a.m. 276 00:10:27,794 --> 00:10:28,878 The assistant coach I had to call 277 00:10:28,962 --> 00:10:30,547 to open up the weight room, 278 00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:33,216 he thought the same thing. 279 00:10:34,843 --> 00:10:36,344 It's good to have some company. 280 00:10:36,427 --> 00:10:37,387 Man, hell yeah. 281 00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:39,681 - The break of dawn boys. - Yeah, that's it. 282 00:10:39,764 --> 00:10:41,850 Hey, let me know if you have any questions about anything. 283 00:10:41,933 --> 00:10:44,060 My only question is, 284 00:10:44,143 --> 00:10:46,396 which way to the starting lineup? 285 00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:49,232 Looks like you're gonna fit in here just fine, Ray. 286 00:10:49,315 --> 00:10:51,568 Let's see what they do here on second and long. 287 00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:54,571 A screen pass to Thomas. 288 00:10:54,654 --> 00:10:56,739 And Ray Lewis said, "I told you." 289 00:10:59,117 --> 00:11:00,702 Man, that kid's unbelievable. 290 00:11:00,785 --> 00:11:02,078 Guy is a natural, brother. 291 00:11:02,161 --> 00:11:03,746 He was born in the back field. 292 00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:04,747 Hey, it's natural talent, 293 00:11:04,831 --> 00:11:06,082 but that guy's busting his ass 294 00:11:06,165 --> 00:11:08,251 in the gym with me every morning. 295 00:11:08,334 --> 00:11:10,962 Man, I just wish I could be out there with him. 296 00:11:11,045 --> 00:11:12,797 Nah, man, not me. 297 00:11:12,881 --> 00:11:15,133 I'm happy right here on the sideline. 298 00:11:15,216 --> 00:11:16,759 No chance of injury, and we still get 299 00:11:16,843 --> 00:11:18,052 the social juice of being on the team. 300 00:11:18,136 --> 00:11:19,804 Social juice? Who cares about social... 301 00:11:19,888 --> 00:11:20,930 nah, man. 302 00:11:21,014 --> 00:11:22,265 This is my future. 303 00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:23,975 I just got to stay ready, wait for my shot 304 00:11:24,058 --> 00:11:25,268 to show 'em what I'm capable of. 305 00:11:25,351 --> 00:11:27,270 I hear you, bro. I'm just saying. 306 00:11:27,353 --> 00:11:29,939 Not all of us need to be masters of the universe. 307 00:11:30,023 --> 00:11:31,065 Some of us are happy with 308 00:11:31,149 --> 00:11:32,609 middle management at State Farm, 309 00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:34,444 with a cute wife with a drinking problem. 310 00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:35,528 Carlos! 311 00:11:35,612 --> 00:11:36,779 That's my girl, Trish, right there. 312 00:11:36,863 --> 00:11:39,282 Carlos, wave to me! 313 00:11:39,365 --> 00:11:40,617 I'm with Lisa! 314 00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:42,076 Hey, baby! 315 00:11:44,370 --> 00:11:46,664 There's no way I'm middle management. 316 00:11:46,748 --> 00:11:48,833 I'm gonna do big things. 317 00:11:48,917 --> 00:11:50,126 Dewey, you're in. Let's go. 318 00:11:50,209 --> 00:11:51,878 Ready, Coach. 319 00:11:55,089 --> 00:11:57,854 35 yards and a sack. Down he goes. Dwayne Johnson. 320 00:11:57,948 --> 00:11:59,510 I read somewhere he was thrown out of... 321 00:11:59,594 --> 00:12:02,180 267 pound junior on... 322 00:12:02,263 --> 00:12:05,266 His father was a tag-team champion back in 1984. 323 00:12:05,350 --> 00:12:06,559 Here comes the number one king. 324 00:12:06,643 --> 00:12:10,313 Marley is all over him along with Johnson. 325 00:12:10,396 --> 00:12:12,774 Floyd is in. We're done. 326 00:12:14,943 --> 00:12:16,903 Number 94, 327 00:12:16,986 --> 00:12:18,488 Dwayne Johnson. 328 00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:20,782 Oh, it's my boy! 329 00:12:22,784 --> 00:12:24,661 Look at how old the other team's coach is. 330 00:12:24,744 --> 00:12:25,870 Like a grandpa! 331 00:12:27,956 --> 00:12:30,416 Babe, Dewey just made an amazing play. 332 00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:33,336 He sacked the quarterback who won the Heisman Trophy. 333 00:12:33,419 --> 00:12:34,796 Yes, that's great. 334 00:12:34,821 --> 00:12:35,838 Will you write down the player's name 335 00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:38,216 so I can send his mother a note? 336 00:12:38,299 --> 00:12:39,384 Okay. 337 00:12:40,259 --> 00:12:41,886 Hey, you got a second, Coach? 338 00:12:41,970 --> 00:12:43,179 Sure, Dewey. Take a seat. 339 00:12:43,262 --> 00:12:44,973 Even though I never started, 340 00:12:45,056 --> 00:12:47,350 I got some decent playing time and made the most of it. 341 00:12:47,433 --> 00:12:49,852 I thought it might be enough to get me noticed. 342 00:12:49,936 --> 00:12:51,229 I just wanted to ask you about something. 343 00:12:51,312 --> 00:12:53,022 Girl advice? Be straightforward, okay? 344 00:12:53,106 --> 00:12:54,482 - Don't play mind games. - Oh, no, no, no... 345 00:12:54,565 --> 00:12:55,566 Be a gentleman, open the door. 346 00:12:55,650 --> 00:12:57,360 No, it's not that. It's, um, 347 00:12:57,443 --> 00:12:59,195 well, I heard that NFL scouts 348 00:12:59,278 --> 00:13:01,531 usually ask for tape on players they're interested in, 349 00:13:01,614 --> 00:13:04,367 and I was just curious if you got any calls for me. 350 00:13:07,328 --> 00:13:08,496 You know, Dwayne, you're one of 351 00:13:08,579 --> 00:13:09,998 the hardest working guys I've ever had here. 352 00:13:10,081 --> 00:13:11,290 You're a fine player. 353 00:13:11,374 --> 00:13:13,001 Hardest working in the weight room, 354 00:13:13,084 --> 00:13:15,044 practice sessions, film sessions. 355 00:13:15,128 --> 00:13:16,879 Hell, I wish half these guys 356 00:13:16,963 --> 00:13:18,881 had 1/10 of your work ethic. 357 00:13:18,965 --> 00:13:20,591 Thank you, Coach. 358 00:13:20,675 --> 00:13:24,095 Which is why I have a question for you. 359 00:13:24,178 --> 00:13:26,848 You ever consider going into coaching? 360 00:13:26,931 --> 00:13:29,017 Uh, what? 361 00:13:29,100 --> 00:13:30,560 You got the skillset to be a great one. 362 00:13:30,643 --> 00:13:33,021 Dependable, diligent... 363 00:13:33,104 --> 00:13:34,188 And then he says 364 00:13:34,272 --> 00:13:35,982 I can do anything I put my mind to. 365 00:13:37,483 --> 00:13:38,443 That's brutal, man. 366 00:13:38,526 --> 00:13:40,028 Man, somebody get my man here 367 00:13:40,111 --> 00:13:40,945 another drink, please. 368 00:13:41,029 --> 00:13:42,238 I mean, he called me dutiful. 369 00:13:42,321 --> 00:13:44,741 That's like what my grandma calls my mom. 370 00:13:44,824 --> 00:13:45,950 That's real messed up. 371 00:13:46,034 --> 00:13:48,911 Has Coach Erickson ever called any of you guys dutiful? 372 00:13:48,995 --> 00:13:49,954 Hell no. 373 00:13:50,038 --> 00:13:51,664 The last thing he called me was 374 00:13:51,748 --> 00:13:54,417 "a rolling ball of butcher knives." 375 00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:57,086 Sapp! Hell of a game you played. 376 00:13:57,170 --> 00:13:59,088 Yo, what's up, Uncle Luke, man! 377 00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:01,132 I appreciate it, man. I appreciate it. 378 00:14:01,215 --> 00:14:05,136 And Ray Ray! Freshman tackling machine. 379 00:14:05,219 --> 00:14:06,054 Yeah, I told y'all I was gonna put 380 00:14:06,137 --> 00:14:07,221 a hurtin' on 'em, Uncle L. 381 00:14:07,305 --> 00:14:08,431 That sack on third down was like 382 00:14:08,514 --> 00:14:10,433 the most beautiful thing I ever seen. 383 00:14:10,516 --> 00:14:12,101 And I've witnessed a bluebird hatching. 384 00:14:13,311 --> 00:14:14,479 Hello, Luther. 385 00:14:14,562 --> 00:14:17,106 Luther? You one of my mama's work friends? 386 00:14:18,191 --> 00:14:19,817 Hey, fellas. Quick question: 387 00:14:19,901 --> 00:14:21,611 what is black, white, and green? 388 00:14:21,694 --> 00:14:23,696 You guys, me, and all the money we're gonna make together. 389 00:14:23,780 --> 00:14:24,989 Hey! 390 00:14:25,073 --> 00:14:26,157 I like the way he talking. 391 00:14:26,240 --> 00:14:29,285 Y'all know Drew, right? Sports agent for the stars. 392 00:14:29,368 --> 00:14:30,620 Now when it's your turn to go pro, 393 00:14:30,703 --> 00:14:33,790 - he's gon' make you rich. - That's right. 394 00:14:33,873 --> 00:14:35,666 Hey, man. How you doing? 395 00:14:35,750 --> 00:14:37,335 - Me? - Him? 396 00:14:37,418 --> 00:14:39,295 Yeah, you, big fella. 397 00:14:39,378 --> 00:14:41,005 - Uh, yeah, good. - Great, glad to hear it. 398 00:14:41,089 --> 00:14:42,173 Mind if I sit down? 399 00:14:42,256 --> 00:14:43,633 Uh, yeah. Sure. 400 00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:45,343 All right, cool. I'll just steal your seat. 401 00:14:50,056 --> 00:14:51,265 Yeah, yeah. You know, I was 402 00:14:51,349 --> 00:14:52,934 kinda running late for this other meeting 403 00:14:53,017 --> 00:14:55,353 with this, uh, this other agent. 404 00:14:55,436 --> 00:14:57,021 All right, I have everyone's number 405 00:14:57,105 --> 00:14:59,148 in this phone. Name someone. 406 00:14:59,232 --> 00:15:01,317 - Kevin Kline. - Have it, boom! 407 00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:02,318 Yo, it's in that? It's in that? 408 00:15:02,401 --> 00:15:03,736 Dude, that's crazy. 409 00:15:03,820 --> 00:15:05,780 If you said Phoebe Cates, then I'd be impressed. 410 00:15:05,863 --> 00:15:06,739 Phoebe Cates? 411 00:15:06,823 --> 00:15:09,158 - Boom, gotcha! - Yo! 412 00:15:09,242 --> 00:15:11,077 He got Phoebe Cates in that mug! 413 00:15:14,580 --> 00:15:16,541 I've always believed that no good happens 414 00:15:16,624 --> 00:15:17,875 without hard work. 415 00:15:17,959 --> 00:15:19,127 But sometimes accepting that 416 00:15:19,210 --> 00:15:21,170 that's still not enough, 417 00:15:21,254 --> 00:15:22,296 that's the tough one. 418 00:15:22,380 --> 00:15:23,840 So I take it things didn't turn around 419 00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:25,091 your senior season? 420 00:15:25,174 --> 00:15:26,384 Well, you know, I played well. 421 00:15:26,467 --> 00:15:28,177 But I never got the starting job, 422 00:15:28,261 --> 00:15:30,304 and before you know it, just like that, 423 00:15:30,388 --> 00:15:32,014 my college football career was over. 424 00:15:32,098 --> 00:15:34,976 And it felt like my dreams were, too. 425 00:15:35,059 --> 00:15:37,186 And now let's talk to Dwayne Johnson. 426 00:15:37,270 --> 00:15:38,855 Thanks, Reggie. Dwayne, how does it feel 427 00:15:38,938 --> 00:15:40,481 to be "Mr. Irrelevant," 428 00:15:40,565 --> 00:15:42,358 the last pick in the NFL Draft? 429 00:15:42,441 --> 00:15:44,360 Reggie? Where's Chris Berman? 430 00:15:44,443 --> 00:15:45,862 He left six rounds ago. 431 00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:47,697 He had tickets to "The Unsinkable Molly Brown." 432 00:15:47,780 --> 00:15:49,031 Oh. 433 00:15:49,115 --> 00:15:52,869 So, I bought you guys a mobile home. 434 00:15:52,952 --> 00:15:54,579 The open road is my front yard. 435 00:15:54,662 --> 00:15:56,706 You should've just kept the cash. 436 00:15:58,624 --> 00:16:01,544 Okay, guys, gather up. 437 00:16:05,923 --> 00:16:07,091 Okay, we just have 438 00:16:07,175 --> 00:16:08,718 a couple of end-of-season awards to give out, 439 00:16:08,801 --> 00:16:10,178 but first, I just want to say 440 00:16:10,261 --> 00:16:12,680 thank you for all of your effort and your sacrifice, 441 00:16:12,763 --> 00:16:13,848 especially our seniors. 442 00:16:17,810 --> 00:16:19,937 So the MVP of our team this year 443 00:16:20,021 --> 00:16:22,023 was also the recipient of the Bronko Nagurski Award 444 00:16:22,106 --> 00:16:24,734 for best defensive player, 445 00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:28,237 the Lombardi Award for best lineman, 446 00:16:28,321 --> 00:16:29,572 First Team All-American, 447 00:16:29,655 --> 00:16:32,116 and the Big East Defensive Player of the Year. 448 00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:35,703 We all look forward to watching him next year play in the NFL, 449 00:16:35,786 --> 00:16:36,621 Warren Sapp. 450 00:16:41,292 --> 00:16:43,419 Appreciate you, Coach. Appreciate you. 451 00:16:43,502 --> 00:16:47,131 Yo, I just want to say thank you to all of you 452 00:16:47,215 --> 00:16:49,634 for allowing me to outshine y'all all these years. 453 00:16:53,596 --> 00:16:55,306 - Warren Sapp. - Yeah! 454 00:16:58,059 --> 00:16:59,602 Okay, and the next award. 455 00:16:59,685 --> 00:17:00,770 Coming all the way back from 456 00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:02,563 academic probation to earn 457 00:17:02,647 --> 00:17:05,775 a 2.8 in general studies, 458 00:17:05,858 --> 00:17:07,693 Scholar of the Year, Mr. Dwayne Johnson. 459 00:17:14,533 --> 00:17:17,453 Dewey! 460 00:17:17,536 --> 00:17:19,205 Hey, Coach, is this your dad? 461 00:17:20,748 --> 00:17:22,959 - It's Benjamin Franklin, son. - Oh, of course. 462 00:17:23,042 --> 00:17:24,001 Doesn't look like you at all. 463 00:17:29,882 --> 00:17:31,133 All right guys, we're out of here 464 00:17:31,217 --> 00:17:32,301 in three days. I want everything packed... 465 00:17:32,385 --> 00:17:33,525 Like I've always done 466 00:17:33,619 --> 00:17:35,346 when I don't know what else to do, 467 00:17:35,429 --> 00:17:36,931 I go home. 468 00:17:37,014 --> 00:17:38,692 My mom wasn't the only one 469 00:17:38,809 --> 00:17:40,590 who was grinding out a paycheck. 470 00:17:40,699 --> 00:17:42,520 My dad couldn't book matches anymore, 471 00:17:42,603 --> 00:17:45,564 so he was teaching at Skinny Jimmy's wrestling camp. 472 00:17:45,648 --> 00:17:47,149 Does this hurt, Richard? 473 00:17:47,233 --> 00:17:49,485 - No. - I can tell. 474 00:17:49,568 --> 00:17:50,695 And so can the audience 475 00:17:50,778 --> 00:17:51,946 'cause you're not selling worth a damn. 476 00:17:52,029 --> 00:17:52,947 Here, let me show you. 477 00:17:53,030 --> 00:17:55,574 Put me in a sleeper hold. 478 00:17:57,618 --> 00:17:58,828 Oh, my God, are you okay? 479 00:17:58,911 --> 00:18:00,579 Richard, I swear to God... 480 00:18:00,663 --> 00:18:03,916 - I'm selling. - Right. 481 00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:05,668 That Richard is a disgrace. 482 00:18:05,751 --> 00:18:08,004 I wish I could go back in time and kill his mother. 483 00:18:08,087 --> 00:18:09,505 At least he's having fun. 484 00:18:09,588 --> 00:18:11,340 He's got a good enough job where he can afford 485 00:18:11,424 --> 00:18:12,550 to pay for these lessons. 486 00:18:12,633 --> 00:18:14,051 What does it matter if he's bad? 487 00:18:14,135 --> 00:18:15,177 All right, everybody. Grab your partner. 488 00:18:15,261 --> 00:18:16,345 If it doesn't matter to him, 489 00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:18,556 it doesn't matter to me. 490 00:18:18,639 --> 00:18:20,349 What matters to you, Dewey? 491 00:18:22,560 --> 00:18:24,812 What matters to me? 492 00:18:24,895 --> 00:18:26,522 My family. 493 00:18:26,605 --> 00:18:28,190 Doing something great. 494 00:18:28,274 --> 00:18:30,401 Proving that I got what it takes. 495 00:18:30,484 --> 00:18:31,736 To do what? 496 00:18:31,819 --> 00:18:34,238 Whatever you got. 497 00:18:34,322 --> 00:18:36,324 You remind me of your grandfather. 498 00:18:36,407 --> 00:18:38,826 - He would say the same thing. - He did? 499 00:18:38,909 --> 00:18:40,244 Everyone thought 500 00:18:40,328 --> 00:18:42,413 that he was too short to be a wrestler, 501 00:18:42,496 --> 00:18:44,081 so he won the title. 502 00:18:44,165 --> 00:18:46,375 They thought that wrestlers couldn't act, 503 00:18:46,459 --> 00:18:49,211 so he got cast in a James Bond movie. 504 00:18:49,295 --> 00:18:51,339 And they thought wrestlers were dumb, 505 00:18:51,422 --> 00:18:53,924 so he started his own promotion business. 506 00:18:54,008 --> 00:18:56,886 He loved being underestimated. 507 00:18:56,969 --> 00:19:00,389 Yeah, I admire that. 508 00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:02,391 Wish I felt that way. 509 00:19:02,475 --> 00:19:03,601 Life is tough. 510 00:19:03,684 --> 00:19:05,770 But you must be tougher. 511 00:19:05,853 --> 00:19:08,064 People don't believe in your dream? 512 00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:11,734 Good. You prove them wrong. 513 00:19:11,817 --> 00:19:14,487 But what if they're right and I'm the one that's wrong? 514 00:19:14,570 --> 00:19:16,197 You are not wrong. 515 00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:18,282 You're going to take us with you. 516 00:19:18,366 --> 00:19:19,909 I know that. 517 00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:21,911 You never give up. 518 00:19:21,994 --> 00:19:24,372 We are all going to make it. 519 00:19:26,957 --> 00:19:30,086 I'm going to cool down walk so I don't choke out Richard. 520 00:19:30,169 --> 00:19:32,088 He got drunk and promised his kid that he'd fight 521 00:19:32,171 --> 00:19:35,257 the ultimate warrior at next year's WrestleMania. 522 00:19:35,341 --> 00:19:37,385 I'm gonna head down to the beach with my tire. 523 00:19:37,468 --> 00:19:38,260 Do some training. 524 00:19:38,344 --> 00:19:40,012 I thought football was over. 525 00:19:40,096 --> 00:19:42,598 The season's over, but the NFL combine's coming up. 526 00:19:42,681 --> 00:19:46,560 Got to make sure I put on a show for those scouts. 527 00:19:46,644 --> 00:19:48,270 Is that my championship ring? 528 00:19:48,354 --> 00:19:51,232 Oh, I like to wear it to the store. 529 00:19:51,315 --> 00:19:52,650 So, yeah, sometimes 530 00:19:52,733 --> 00:19:56,278 there are things in life you just can't control, 531 00:19:56,362 --> 00:19:58,447 but my family was never a variable. 532 00:19:58,531 --> 00:20:03,160 Okay, try this again. Richard... 533 00:20:03,244 --> 00:20:06,414 They were always there. 534 00:20:17,925 --> 00:20:19,510 So we provide a discount on a rental car 535 00:20:19,593 --> 00:20:22,263 if you commit to a midsize or above. 536 00:20:22,346 --> 00:20:25,099 Uh, sorry, I'm just gonna have to place you on a brief hold. 537 00:20:25,182 --> 00:20:26,142 Dewey, what are you doing here? 538 00:20:26,225 --> 00:20:29,186 Just dropped by to bring you this. 539 00:20:29,270 --> 00:20:31,355 Might not be able to get you out of here yet, 540 00:20:31,439 --> 00:20:33,023 but in the meantime, I can at least make you 541 00:20:33,107 --> 00:20:34,817 a little more comfortable. 542 00:20:34,900 --> 00:20:37,236 Hey, why's she the only one who gets one of those? 543 00:20:37,319 --> 00:20:38,612 Don't worry about what she's getting. 544 00:20:38,696 --> 00:20:39,989 Know your role and shut your mouth. 545 00:20:40,072 --> 00:20:41,365 Get out of here, Carl. 546 00:20:41,449 --> 00:20:42,741 Who's that chiming-in bitch? 547 00:20:42,825 --> 00:20:44,285 Carl. 548 00:20:44,368 --> 00:20:47,163 Thank you for the fan, baby. 549 00:20:47,246 --> 00:20:48,998 I love you. 550 00:20:49,081 --> 00:20:52,001 Hey, it might take a little longer, 551 00:20:52,084 --> 00:20:54,670 but I'm getting to the pros, Mom. 552 00:20:54,753 --> 00:20:56,672 We're gonna make it. 553 00:20:56,755 --> 00:20:57,798 You know, for four years, 554 00:20:57,882 --> 00:21:00,009 I had gone up against future Hall-of-Famers. 555 00:21:00,092 --> 00:21:01,844 And I was good, but I was never great. 556 00:21:01,927 --> 00:21:03,721 But I still thought I was good enough to get a shot, 557 00:21:03,804 --> 00:21:05,139 and all I needed was 558 00:21:05,222 --> 00:21:07,475 one NFL team who believed in me. 559 00:21:07,558 --> 00:21:09,518 So did an NFL team take a chance on you? 560 00:21:09,602 --> 00:21:11,145 Did you get drafted? 561 00:21:11,228 --> 00:21:13,022 Well, we'll save that story for another time. 562 00:21:13,113 --> 00:21:15,646 - Oh, okay, I can't wait. - It's a good one. 563 00:21:15,716 --> 00:21:17,568 Yeah, I won't have the hard pear cider next time. 564 00:21:17,659 --> 00:21:21,185 - Cheers. - Oh, yes, um... 565 00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:27,703 There you go. 566 00:21:27,786 --> 00:21:29,538 Get it. 567 00:21:29,622 --> 00:21:31,123 Love it. 39981

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