All language subtitles for Tender Touches s03e03 Microecosystems.eng

Did you know that they might be
saying many different things?

Hissing roaches have three
different hisses.

Really?

They call it flirting, fighting,
and [bleep]ing hisses

and they’re all exactly
the same to our ears.

So I don’t know what they’re
saying at me

when they get upset.

No, but they do have
different messages.

Because they don’t always
run away.

Sometimes they get closer.

I think they love me.

Nice.

They are very capable
of learning.

And roaches
can absolutely learn

that they get fed
when they get on your hand.

And they will learn
to come onto your hand.

That’s not the first thing
that’s learned

to [bleep] on my hand.

Haha.
Nasty.

Your green banana roaches
are looking good.

I love your porcelain roaches.

They’re really breeding up
a storm.

Nice.
Oh, your zebra roaches?

Yeah, like better horses.
Looking good.

Naomi, the Suriname Roach,
she doesn’t move around.

I’ve tried installing raisins
in the shape of Stonehenge.

And she doesn’t give a [bleep].

She’s parthenogenic,
so she can clone herself.

She has everything she needs
to make babies.

So you’re not giving
her something.

Sure we can make all these
roaches happy in there.

Like in the bubble gum forest
and the spaghetti bridge.

Pop‐‐ Popsicle stick,
uh, sex swing.

But even here, in this romantic,
Alaskan cabin tank ‐‐

Oh, wow.

Naomi doesn’t got what she need
to clone herself.

That frustrating little bitch.

Steve,
are you in your bug room?

You know this is my passion
project I take care of at home.

You have a new passion project
every other week.

Uh, yeah.

Uh, I love when Michelle
yells at you.

At least I’m not a weird boomer
with a train set.

You’ll probably be
that next week.

No, I won’t.
What’s wrong with train sets?

Whatever.
They’re so playful and fun...

This is why we’re not
adopting four kids.

Well, we adopted, like,
a hundred roaches.

They’re cooler, man!

Michelle, they are pretty cool
if you actually come up

and check ’em out, they love
to eat these corn chips.

No, Curtis!
Yeah.

You can’t feed corn chips
to the roaches.

I just put them in there
like this.

Whoa!
They can’t digest those oils.

They say they’re
not that unhealthy on the back.

Who’s they?
The advertisers on the bag.

Unacceptable.
[ Hisses ]

Alright, s‐‐ I can ‐‐

[ Hisses ]
Hey, hey, hey.

I hear hissing.
Are you guys fighting?

Now I’m hissing at you,
Michelle.

[ Hissing ]
Guys! No, no, no!

Hi, hey, hey!
Whoa!

We’re crossing some lines.

I think we’ve all said some
things that we’re gonna regret.

Daniel, you’re right.

First we have to powder
all of the lids.

Curtis, I gotta to powder
the lids right now.

So can you go downstairs?

Yeah, sure.
Maybe calm Michelle down.

Yeah,
I’ll get outta your hair.

Soy‐boy cucks like you
always seem to calm people down.

Well, at least I’m not
a Suriname cockroach.

Don’t talk about Naomi
like that ‐‐ [ Belches ]

God, what did I eat
this morning?

She’s just too cold
to plop out babies.

Well, Daniel,
I hate to say this,

but maybe I need you
to come with me to the bug store

and get her some scarves or a ‐‐
You know you’re my best friend.

I know it.
Just for you, I will do this.

I will put aside my feud
with the insect store.

Oh, man.

What a commotion up there
with those guys together. Ugh!

You want a chip, Michelle?

Uh, sure, I’ll have a chip.

♪

Mmm.

Steve and Daniel up there are
being real weird about the bugs.

It’s kind of frustrating.
Yeah.

Like, he’s always jumping
onto a new thing.

Every time he does,
he just forgets all about me.

You know, when I feel like
I’m being neglected,

I take up to my room and start
working on my live stream.

Oh yeah.
How’s that been going?

It’s badass.

Yeah, I caught a few episodes.

[ Yawns ]
I’m really proud of you.

Playing guitar a lot lately.

Oh, yeah?

Painting, and that’s
very rewarding.

And it’s actually ‐‐
it’s a very,

you know, intimate process.

Uh, why doesn’t Steve paint you,
like, nude, or whatever?

I mean,
he’s into bugs right now.

He never listens to me.

Probably the best way to listen
to someone is to stare at them.

Would you wanna do that?

Paint me wearing only these?

Oh, Michelle.

What, what, what?
You scared?

[ Laughs ] I’m not‐ Fa, wha,
wha, wha‐ I’m not scared.

Hey guys,
what are you doing?

No, no, uh ‐‐

Daniel and I
are going to the bug store.

Oh.
Curtis, you’re coming with me.

It’s bro time.
Yeah.

Okay.

What?
For brothers.

Michelle, I’m sorry
I was yelling earlier.

I’m sorry, too.
Yeah.

Well I’m giving you a light,
impersonal hug.

Hmm hmm hmm.

Daniel’s got the keys
for the golf cart.

We’re going.
Wow.

I’ve never driven
in a golf cart.

Well you’re not driving,
you’re riding.

Oh.

Uh, tarantulas are supposed
to be awesome.

That’s one I’m looking forward
to trying.

Because the cephalothorax
is supposed to be

shrimpy in texture,
Huh.

and kind of sweet,
but the abdomen is creamy.

What about all the hairs?

Well, you have to remember
to singe off the hairs.

Those little urticating hairs
would be terrible in your mouth.

Do you get
why I like bugs now?

This part is pretty cool,
actually. I ‐‐

Maybe we just got to give her
this big, warming diaper.

But then if she has babies,
they’ll be stuck in the diaper.

Or a robe?
With a hole for each limb?

I think she’ll appreciate it.

I think it’ll make her feel
better about herself.

Feel sexy.
Yeah.

Does this hat work?
Uh, it seems like,

"Oh I’m the best bug
on the planet."

How about these, uh ‐‐
this corduroy vest?

The little ridges would be nice
for keeping her fungus gnats.

Fungus.
I was just going to say

it would be nice
for the fungus gnats.

I was just gonna say that.
Oh.

This yellow cardigan
is so lovely.

Dang.

Imagine that soft merino wool
on Michelle.

We’re looking for clothes
for Naomi.

Michelle’s wearing this
yellow cardigan, it’s just ‐

just like, matte,
like on a picnic.

I mean, she looks great
in cardigans.

That’s fun to think about.
That’s fun to ‐‐

Yeah. Well, Curtis I get it.
Michelle and I...

sometimes we have problems,
but she’s hot.

Mm.
Yeah. Yeah.

I give you permission to enjoy
the fact she’s hot,

but right now we’re focusing
on clothes for my bug.

Heh.
Okay, alright.

So you give me, th‐‐
I have permission then.

Yeah.
She’s hot.

Right on ‐‐
Right on, man.

Oh, I’ve got a feeling
at the end of this

I’m gonna end up
with a lot of clothes

I didn’t expect to get.
That’s awesome.

That always happens
when you go in the bug store.

You just have to know.
Yeah.

Guys, I’m gonna be
in the lighting department.

Oh, hey ‐‐

Oh, boy, here we go.
Hey, Curtis.

I just want to let you know,
Charlene,

but I’m probably going
to be painting Michelle nude.

And you’re, uh, the f‐‐ the
first person that I’m telling.

I want ‐ I want you to ‐‐
I want you to know.

So, uh ‐‐ uh ‐‐ I don‐‐
I don’t understand.

Are you an artist?
Yeah.

Or a pervert?
No, I’m an artist.

Curtis, I don’t need to know

what nude people
you’re painting, okay?

I don’t call you up and tell you
about all the basketball courts

I’ve been trolling
to pick up sweet calves.

Curtis, we’re gonna pay
for the robe.

Where is that guy?

Seven dollars
and thirty‐three cents.

Hey there, Elliot.

How’s the insect society
going since I was kicked out?

Much better.
So you’re Daniel’s enemy.

The one who drew actor
Greg Kinnear’s face

on all those ants
and tried to get the world

to think that it was
a new species of ant.

That doesn’t mean ‐‐
it’s still a new kind of ant!

What’s your deal
with Greg Kinnear, huh?

You freak.
Why you so obsessed, you freak?

My mom always thought
he was a great actor.

Well, where is she now?

She died of cancer
three years ago.

Told you.

Maybe if you, like,
move your fingers a little bit.

Uh...
Uh‐huh.

Where should I move them?

Um. Uh...
Like...

[ Chuckles ]

Never noticed how lovely
your hair was.

Thank you.

Your hair is quite lovely, too.

Ah, you know, it’s alright.

I use uh...

I use a lot of shampoo
on it.

I think that’s my secret.

Ohh.
Just lots of shampoo.

Should I spread my legs more?

No.
What’s wrong?

Nothi‐‐
I just ‐‐

Lemme get some of that hair
that fell in your eyes.

I’m just gonna...
Oh.

Ah!
What’s wrong?

Okay.
What are you doing?

You know, I have to go.
You have to finish.

I just remembered...

♪

I’m sorry, I was just standing
at the doorway to see

if I was really going,
and I am.

Now, I have had to reinsert
a couple prolapses in frogs.

It’s easier than
you might think.

Oh, yeah.
Just fingers, or ‐‐

Steve!
Oh, what are you doing here?

I can’t do it, man.
I can’t. I ‐‐

What, are you d‐‐ trying to take
a dump and you got scared?

No, no, no.
No. Um ‐‐ Um...

’Cause sometimes
you get scared.

No, we had a very
honest conversation.

It was not a big deal
and I just told her no we can’t.

What are you talking about?

Are you just coming in here
not talking about bugs?

Michelle and I didn’t make love.
Wait.

I can’t do it. It’s not ‐‐
It’s not gonna happen.

What?
Of course you can’t do it!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Could ‐‐ You said
you gave me permission.

Like, you mean like what I said
in the bug store earlier?

You ‐‐
Steve, you always said,

"I sleep with yours,
you sleep with mine."

No!
I never said this!

Well, then why did
I think you said that?

Because you’re a delusional
little man!

Hey! Hey!
Who’s scared and sad right now.

I’m 5’5".
Ohh.

That’s not little.

Okay, short king.
Thank you.

Did she even want
to sleep with you?

Ye‐Yeah.

She let me paint her breast
and her [bleep].

I painted her nude.

Curtis, she went to college
for nude modeling.

That was her minor.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.
You guys.

What?
There are bigger things at play.

I think Naomi is gravid.

Uh... What?

I think babies
are gonna come out.

It’s happening.
Pink noise.

Oh.
Why is the terrarium breaking?

Oh, no. What ‐‐
Aah!

Why are the terrariums breaking?
You guys?

Curtis, you come in here,
scream and stomping around.

Pink noise!
What is happening?

Oh, my God,
everything’s breaking. I just ‐‐

Guys, save this
fight for later.

Let’s just wait
till this is done.

I’m gonna crumple all these up
and throw ’em away, Daniel.

I have 70 people
watching this right now!

You put away
that omnidirectional mic.

It’s not omnidirectional,
it’s ambisonic.

Oh, my God. The roaches are
crawling out the window.

There’s hemolymph everywhere!

Eeee‐owww!

Daniel.
Daniel.

You’re made of glass.

I always was.

That’s [bleep] up, Curtis.

Thanks everyone for watching,
we got something weird

going on in here,
though, I have to take care of.

Curtis, I’m hugging you.

Uh, my brother, he’s ‐‐

Look a‐‐
Look at me.

I’m ‐‐

Don’t you ever try
and make diddlefun

with Michelle again, okay?

It just didn’t feel right.

I thought of you.
That’s really weird.

I think you completely
misunderstood something

I said earlier.
Mm‐hmm.

So I misunderstood?
You did.

Well that’s embarrassing.
You know what, Curtis?

Instead of like, trying to
wedge yourself in between me

Mm‐hmm.
and my complicated love life,

Mm‐hmm.

You could find a way
to maybe bring us all together.

Okay.
As a unit?

All three of us.

Oh, so all three of us.
Okay.

Damn right, we’re like a unit.

Okay.
Hey.

I’m gonna kiss you
on the forehead, Curtis.

[ Chuckles ]
Okay.

It kind of looks like
a piñata.

Eh.

Aren’t really

You’re usually full of treats,
aren’t you?

Heh, yeah.

Walking my fingers
on your chest.

Heh, it’s like a little soldier
marching to war.

Sometimes I need to feel like

I’m chasing
something new, Michelle.

Which is why I got so lost
in things like my roaches.

[ Hisses ]

Yeah, I know.

And it’s ‐‐ you’re still ‐‐
you’re cool.

Steve, I can’t just wait around
for you

to be as excited about me
as you are about the roaches

or whatever weird thing
you’re gonna come up with next.

Yeah.

[ Squeals ]

Okay, yeah. Maybe at some point
I’ll shout you out,

Upside Down Guy.

Uh, but it’s, you know,
I might forget

’cause I’m gonna be
in the moment.

Uh, cause when I lo‐‐
I lose my mind when I have sex.

Ah!
Hey guys, I have an erection!

Steve: What?

♪ The image of her broken lips

♪ The pictures of her hips
to hips ♪

♪ The ample love
that wasn’t his ♪

[ Laughs ]
Michelle, he thought we were having a threesome!

Ew!
[ Laughs ]

I just decided I don’t wanna
have a threesome anymore.

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