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1
00:00:18,835 --> 00:00:20,295
See these, America?
2
00:00:20,378 --> 00:00:23,648
Four ringside seats
to Hutchinson and Turner fight
3
00:00:23,724 --> 00:00:25,104
in Vegas tonight.
4
00:00:25,175 --> 00:00:26,765
Surprise gift from the fellas.
5
00:00:26,843 --> 00:00:28,073
Yes, sir.
6
00:00:27,778 --> 00:00:29,848
Me and the boys
hitting the fight,
7
00:00:29,930 --> 00:00:32,610
the casinos, the strip club.
8
00:00:32,682 --> 00:00:34,822
I don't care what you think,
America, and I'm ready.
9
00:00:34,893 --> 00:00:36,573
I've been ready ever since
I missed last year's trip
10
00:00:36,645 --> 00:00:39,865
on account of those sick
nasty germy little kids.
11
00:00:39,948 --> 00:00:43,528
See, last year I gave Bryana
a birthday party and influenza.
12
00:00:43,610 --> 00:00:46,290
But trust me, this year,
ain't nothing ruining it.
13
00:00:46,363 --> 00:00:49,173
Me and the boys
are taking the noon flight.
14
00:00:49,249 --> 00:00:52,539
That's right, and I don't plan
on spending not one second more
15
00:00:52,619 --> 00:00:53,799
with those doggone kids.
16
00:00:53,879 --> 00:00:56,509
So come on in, flu. Chicken pox.
17
00:00:56,581 --> 00:01:00,181
Flesh-eating disease,
ringworms, I don't care.
18
00:01:00,252 --> 00:01:02,592
Whatever you got, bring it on.
19
00:01:02,671 --> 00:01:06,141
Take your best shot
'cause Bernie Mac going to Vegas
20
00:01:06,216 --> 00:01:10,766
and nothing, I mean nothing,
is going to stop me.
21
00:01:10,780 --> 00:01:11,770
Come on, now, Wanda.
22
00:01:11,847 --> 00:01:12,767
You promised
you take them.
23
00:01:12,848 --> 00:01:14,218
I'm sorry.
24
00:01:14,300 --> 00:01:15,730
I have a special presentation
to make for work.
25
00:01:15,809 --> 00:01:17,119
Come on.
These things come up.
26
00:01:17,194 --> 00:01:18,824
Fine, they won't go.
27
00:01:18,829 --> 00:01:20,179
That's
not fair.
28
00:01:20,255 --> 00:01:21,815
You guys promised you'd
take us to the movies!
29
00:01:21,832 --> 00:01:24,202
Got it in writing?
30
00:01:24,276 --> 00:01:26,156
Come on, sweetheart.
You got to be there?
31
00:01:26,236 --> 00:01:29,206
Well, considering it's
a $30 million account
32
00:01:29,289 --> 00:01:30,869
on which I happen to be
project manager,
33
00:01:30,949 --> 00:01:33,079
yeah, I guess I do.
34
00:01:33,160 --> 00:01:35,090
But baby, it's Vegas.
35
00:01:35,162 --> 00:01:37,212
I might win $30 million,
then we'll be even.
36
00:01:37,289 --> 00:01:39,049
See? It's starting.
37
00:01:39,124 --> 00:01:41,174
Dark forces conspiring
to ruin my trip,
38
00:01:41,251 --> 00:01:42,761
but it ain't going to work.
39
00:01:42,836 --> 00:01:44,556
See, I spoke to the fellas
and they're cool.
40
00:01:44,438 --> 00:01:46,508
So I'm going to take them evil
kids to see the first show
41
00:01:46,590 --> 00:01:47,970
and then I'm going
to get 'em back home,
42
00:01:48,049 --> 00:01:49,219
I'm going to feed them.
43
00:01:49,301 --> 00:01:50,181
And the second my baby
walk through the door,
44
00:01:50,260 --> 00:01:51,740
I'm a memory, America.
45
00:01:51,820 --> 00:01:55,480
I'm gone, went, I'm out of here,
86, got my hat.
46
00:01:55,557 --> 00:01:57,737
I want to see Jake Fury:Fists of Iron.
47
00:01:57,818 --> 00:02:00,358
I want to go to Vegas,
but if I suffer, you suffer.
48
00:02:00,437 --> 00:02:03,407
There is no way I'm seeing
some G-rated movie.
49
00:02:03,481 --> 00:02:05,281
I can't stop you from
closing your eyes, okay?
50
00:02:05,358 --> 00:02:07,738
Three kids for Field GoalKicking Mule,
51
00:02:07,819 --> 00:02:08,999
and one for Bloody Dead 3.
52
00:02:09,079 --> 00:02:10,789
How come you get to see
what you want to see?
53
00:02:10,864 --> 00:02:12,254
Shut up or be Bloody Dead 4.
54
00:02:12,324 --> 00:02:14,504
Go on in there.
55
00:02:14,510 --> 00:02:16,680
(mumbling)
56
00:02:16,753 --> 00:02:19,133
(arcade games beeping)
57
00:02:19,140 --> 00:02:21,470
Oh, hey, there's Vanessa.
Hi!
58
00:02:29,549 --> 00:02:31,559
Come on. Come on.
Get in there.
59
00:02:31,635 --> 00:02:32,805
Baby girl.
60
00:02:32,886 --> 00:02:34,316
Watch them!
61
00:02:43,772 --> 00:02:46,242
Mm-mm, mm-mm.
62
00:02:46,316 --> 00:02:47,316
Don't go in there.
63
00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:48,990
This some hell naw.
64
00:02:49,069 --> 00:02:50,659
How many people
go in the cemetery
65
00:02:50,737 --> 00:02:51,697
after a radiation leak?
66
00:02:51,780 --> 00:02:53,000
You know there's
zombies in there.
67
00:02:53,073 --> 00:02:54,213
Shh.
68
00:02:56,034 --> 00:02:58,544
(gasping)
69
00:02:58,554 --> 00:02:59,934
I told you.
70
00:03:00,005 --> 00:03:00,955
Didn't I say it?
71
00:03:01,039 --> 00:03:02,959
Didn't I tell you? Shh.
72
00:03:03,041 --> 00:03:04,511
This some hell naw.
73
00:03:04,518 --> 00:03:06,478
(shouting)
74
00:03:09,756 --> 00:03:11,816
Man,
this is crap.
75
00:03:11,892 --> 00:03:13,102
I can't take it
anymore.
76
00:03:13,176 --> 00:03:14,266
Hey,
77
00:03:14,344 --> 00:03:16,024
you stay here and watch Bryana.
78
00:03:16,096 --> 00:03:19,226
(sighing)
79
00:03:19,307 --> 00:03:20,977
I don't want
to stay here either.
80
00:03:21,059 --> 00:03:22,529
I hate mules.
81
00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:24,366
(exploding)
82
00:03:27,607 --> 00:03:30,777
Jake Fury: Fists of Iron.
83
00:03:30,860 --> 00:03:32,790
Okay, you stay here
84
00:03:32,796 --> 00:03:34,076
and watch the movie,
okay?
85
00:03:34,155 --> 00:03:36,665
Isn't the mule funny?
86
00:03:39,119 --> 00:03:40,929
Heehaw, heehaw.
87
00:03:42,664 --> 00:03:44,714
So, hey, what do you
think of Todd Miller?
88
00:03:44,791 --> 00:03:47,131
He is so cute.
Why?
89
00:03:47,144 --> 00:03:48,944
'Cause he's coming
this way.
90
00:03:49,012 --> 00:03:50,352
Hey, Vanessa.
91
00:03:50,430 --> 00:03:51,140
Hey.
92
00:03:51,148 --> 00:03:52,758
Donna.
Hey.
93
00:03:52,841 --> 00:03:55,601
So, you guys going
to Aaron's party tonight?
94
00:03:55,677 --> 00:03:56,807
Yeah. You?
95
00:03:56,886 --> 00:03:58,946
Yeah.
96
00:04:03,577 --> 00:04:07,747
(machine guns and explosion)
97
00:04:10,525 --> 00:04:12,485
Whoa!
98
00:04:12,569 --> 00:04:14,289
This is a great movie.
99
00:04:14,362 --> 00:04:15,952
(gunshots)
100
00:04:16,031 --> 00:04:17,251
(exploding)
101
00:04:17,324 --> 00:04:18,214
Vanessa, look.
102
00:04:18,283 --> 00:04:20,793
He keeps checking
you out.
103
00:04:20,869 --> 00:04:22,339
(giggling)
104
00:04:24,598 --> 00:04:25,588
Ooh.
105
00:04:25,665 --> 00:04:27,625
(giggling)
106
00:04:27,709 --> 00:04:28,709
(shouting)
107
00:04:28,785 --> 00:04:29,585
Man, that's
one hungry zombie.
108
00:04:29,669 --> 00:04:30,799
Man, look at it.
I love it.
109
00:04:30,879 --> 00:04:32,059
BRYANA:
Uncle Bernie?
110
00:04:32,139 --> 00:04:33,259
(shouting)
111
00:04:33,340 --> 00:04:34,600
Chew on his ass.
112
00:04:34,608 --> 00:04:36,308
Uncle Bernie?
113
00:04:36,384 --> 00:04:37,984
(shouting)
114
00:04:38,053 --> 00:04:39,273
Uncle Bernie!
115
00:04:39,346 --> 00:04:40,976
Baby girl, baby girl.
116
00:04:41,056 --> 00:04:42,266
Don't look at it.
117
00:04:42,349 --> 00:04:43,409
What you doing here?
118
00:04:43,483 --> 00:04:45,033
They abandoned me,
Uncle Bernie.
119
00:04:45,101 --> 00:04:46,901
Come on, come on.
120
00:04:46,912 --> 00:04:49,652
(screaming)
121
00:04:49,731 --> 00:04:53,241
They better have a
good doggone reason for leaving baby girl.
122
00:04:53,318 --> 00:04:54,488
A good reason.
123
00:04:54,569 --> 00:04:56,749
Baby girl, popcorn.
124
00:04:56,821 --> 00:04:58,661
A good reason.
125
00:04:58,674 --> 00:05:00,794
(exploding)
126
00:05:00,867 --> 00:05:02,957
(quietly)
Jordan?
127
00:05:03,036 --> 00:05:04,456
Jordan?
128
00:05:04,537 --> 00:05:05,207
Quiet!
129
00:05:05,288 --> 00:05:06,798
Jordan?
130
00:05:06,873 --> 00:05:07,933
Come on...
131
00:05:08,008 --> 00:05:10,628
Oh, I'm sorry.
Come on man, sit down.
132
00:05:10,644 --> 00:05:11,564
Jordan.
133
00:05:14,806 --> 00:05:16,556
Jordan.
Shh.
134
00:05:16,633 --> 00:05:17,933
WOMAN ON SCREEN:
Jake, you saved
135
00:05:17,943 --> 00:05:19,333
my life.
Excuse me.
136
00:05:19,402 --> 00:05:21,392
I can think of onlyone way to repay you.
137
00:05:21,471 --> 00:05:22,951
It's timeto pull out...
138
00:05:23,023 --> 00:05:24,023
Ow!
You know better.
139
00:05:24,099 --> 00:05:25,019
(unzipping on screen)
140
00:05:25,100 --> 00:05:26,320
Whoa, boobies.
141
00:05:26,393 --> 00:05:28,243
Man, that's nice.
142
00:05:28,320 --> 00:05:30,030
Real nice.
143
00:05:30,105 --> 00:05:31,275
Do you think
those are real?
144
00:05:31,356 --> 00:05:32,826
Man, there ain't
nothing fake...
145
00:05:34,984 --> 00:05:35,954
Ow, my face.
146
00:05:36,027 --> 00:05:36,947
Get up.
147
00:05:36,962 --> 00:05:37,992
Ow, my face.
148
00:05:38,071 --> 00:05:39,581
Ow...
149
00:05:39,590 --> 00:05:42,670
Uncle Bernie!
Quiet.
150
00:05:43,576 --> 00:05:44,506
Go on.
151
00:05:45,203 --> 00:05:47,133
That was cool.
152
00:05:47,205 --> 00:05:49,335
Oh, I'm dead.
153
00:05:49,350 --> 00:05:50,550
You know you're dead,
don't you?
154
00:05:50,625 --> 00:05:52,125
I told you to watch
your brother and sister.
155
00:05:52,210 --> 00:05:53,540
You couldn't even do that.
156
00:05:53,479 --> 00:05:54,479
Baby girl ended up
sitting next to me
157
00:05:54,554 --> 00:05:56,184
watching the most
gruesome movie
158
00:05:56,256 --> 00:05:57,176
and this young freak,
159
00:05:57,257 --> 00:05:58,147
he sittin' up there watching...
160
00:05:58,225 --> 00:05:59,215
Boobies.
161
00:05:59,234 --> 00:06:00,104
Big ones.
162
00:06:00,176 --> 00:06:01,516
Real live boobies.
163
00:06:01,594 --> 00:06:03,354
Jordan, will you shut up?
164
00:06:03,430 --> 00:06:04,770
You're just jealous
'cause you ain't got none.
165
00:06:04,848 --> 00:06:06,868
♪ You ain't got
no boobies. ♪
166
00:06:06,942 --> 00:06:08,152
Jordan, shut up!
167
00:06:08,226 --> 00:06:09,686
Jordan,
I hope you got a good memory
168
00:06:09,769 --> 00:06:11,359
'cause that's the last pair
you're ever going to see.
169
00:06:11,438 --> 00:06:13,068
Let's go.
170
00:06:13,148 --> 00:06:13,958
Nessa!
171
00:06:15,275 --> 00:06:16,615
Damn kids.
172
00:06:16,693 --> 00:06:18,913
Made me miss Vegas for this.
173
00:06:18,987 --> 00:06:21,157
I should have put them
in a kennel for the day.
174
00:06:21,239 --> 00:06:22,869
"I saw boobies."
175
00:06:22,949 --> 00:06:24,119
(chuckling)
176
00:06:24,200 --> 00:06:26,010
America, I'm...
177
00:06:27,537 --> 00:06:29,207
Yeah, Chuy, man, my fault, man.
178
00:06:29,289 --> 00:06:30,589
I'm sorry, man.
179
00:06:30,665 --> 00:06:32,215
I should have never gave in
to no doggone kids.
180
00:06:32,292 --> 00:06:34,382
But dig, as soon
as Wanda get in, man,
181
00:06:34,461 --> 00:06:36,721
I'll call you and
we'll bounce, hear?
182
00:06:36,796 --> 00:06:38,386
Hi-yah!
183
00:06:38,465 --> 00:06:42,225
I am Jake Fury
and I have fists of iron!
184
00:06:42,302 --> 00:06:44,362
You want to see how Jake kicks?
185
00:06:44,438 --> 00:06:45,688
Hi-yah!
186
00:06:45,763 --> 00:06:47,163
Ow! Ow!
187
00:06:47,232 --> 00:06:49,742
My shoulder!
188
00:06:49,818 --> 00:06:50,898
Ow...
189
00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:52,444
Boy, what's wrong with you?
190
00:06:52,520 --> 00:06:55,740
My shoulder! Ow!
191
00:06:55,815 --> 00:06:57,115
That hurt?
192
00:06:57,192 --> 00:06:58,182
Don't touch it! Ow!
193
00:06:58,127 --> 00:06:59,237
Chuy, this boy done separated
194
00:06:59,319 --> 00:07:00,239
his doggone shoulder.
195
00:07:00,320 --> 00:07:01,540
Listen, y'all go head on, man,
196
00:07:01,613 --> 00:07:03,053
I'll catch up with you, okay?
197
00:07:03,123 --> 00:07:05,333
I can't breathe it hurts so bad.
198
00:07:05,342 --> 00:07:06,962
See, that's what you get
for watching things
199
00:07:07,035 --> 00:07:08,285
you ain't got
no business watching.
200
00:07:08,369 --> 00:07:09,919
Now I got to take you
to the hospital.
201
00:07:09,996 --> 00:07:11,206
Ah, don't touch it!
202
00:07:11,289 --> 00:07:12,429
Shut up.
203
00:07:21,216 --> 00:07:22,266
This hospital for the poor, man.
204
00:07:22,342 --> 00:07:23,272
They got one doctor.
205
00:07:23,343 --> 00:07:24,453
This is ridiculous.
206
00:07:24,361 --> 00:07:26,021
Don't make no doggone sense,
man.
207
00:07:26,095 --> 00:07:27,975
Mr. Mayser?
208
00:07:28,056 --> 00:07:30,056
Ho, ho, ho, ho, wait, man.
He just got here.
209
00:07:30,075 --> 00:07:32,275
We've been here
for three hours. What's going on?
210
00:07:32,352 --> 00:07:33,822
Sir, Mr. Mayser
has chest pains.
211
00:07:33,829 --> 00:07:35,739
Why you got to say, like,
"He got chest pains"?
212
00:07:35,813 --> 00:07:38,323
Boy, you better find something
wrong with you real quick.
213
00:07:38,399 --> 00:07:39,659
Get some chest pains
or something. Ow!
214
00:07:39,734 --> 00:07:40,684
I'm telling you,
if I miss this flight,
215
00:07:40,760 --> 00:07:41,620
we're going to be on the news.
216
00:07:41,694 --> 00:07:44,294
I'm not, but, you...
woo.
217
00:07:44,364 --> 00:07:46,544
I was so embarrassed.
218
00:07:46,616 --> 00:07:48,706
Did they say anything?
219
00:07:48,785 --> 00:07:50,705
I don't care what Freddie said.
220
00:07:50,787 --> 00:07:53,547
Did Todd say anything?
221
00:07:53,623 --> 00:07:56,223
What? No, Jordan
is not funny...
222
00:07:56,226 --> 00:07:59,216
Hey, Vanessa,
where are they?
223
00:07:59,295 --> 00:08:01,425
Hey, baby, I-I left
as soon as I got your message.
224
00:08:01,506 --> 00:08:02,806
Wanda, baby, I'm
so glad you're here.
225
00:08:02,882 --> 00:08:04,472
The little boy,
he a little hungry.
226
00:08:04,551 --> 00:08:06,101
The kid's gonna need
something to eat, but I got to catch a flight.
227
00:08:06,111 --> 00:08:08,061
I'm out this hot dog stand
and I'm leaving the mustard.
228
00:08:08,137 --> 00:08:09,557
Uh, uh, baby.
Come on, Wanda. I ain't no doctor.
229
00:08:09,639 --> 00:08:12,689
Ain't nothing I can do
for the boy's shoulder.
230
00:08:12,767 --> 00:08:14,317
Come on.
Let me live, baby.
231
00:08:14,394 --> 00:08:16,404
Baby, he needs
your moral support.
232
00:08:16,413 --> 00:08:18,243
The boys already
landed in Sin City.
233
00:08:18,314 --> 00:08:19,414
Come on, Wanda.
Let me go...
234
00:08:19,482 --> 00:08:22,082
Baby, come on now!
235
00:08:22,151 --> 00:08:24,291
If you were a little
thicker, a little taller
236
00:08:24,296 --> 00:08:25,876
about right up in here,
penalty.
237
00:08:25,956 --> 00:08:27,376
I'll let you.
238
00:08:27,457 --> 00:08:30,257
Go ahead and walk it off.
239
00:08:30,335 --> 00:08:31,955
You okay?
Ow...
240
00:08:32,036 --> 00:08:33,286
I know, I know.
241
00:08:33,371 --> 00:08:34,631
Ow! Don't touch it!
242
00:08:34,706 --> 00:08:35,956
Okay, okay,
hey, baby.
243
00:08:36,040 --> 00:08:36,800
-Ow!
-I know.
244
00:08:36,874 --> 00:08:38,274
Oh, baby, this some bull.
245
00:08:38,343 --> 00:08:39,303
I'm out of here.
246
00:08:39,377 --> 00:08:41,007
I'm getting out of here.
247
00:08:41,087 --> 00:08:41,967
No, don't go.
248
00:08:42,046 --> 00:08:43,196
Hold on.
The doctor's here.
249
00:08:43,148 --> 00:08:44,558
See, Jordan, you're
in good hands now.
250
00:08:44,632 --> 00:08:47,102
Actually, I'm just here
to take him to X-ray.
251
00:08:47,176 --> 00:08:48,106
Where you taking me?
252
00:08:49,538 --> 00:08:49,848
Uncle Bernie,
he's taking me somewhere!
253
00:08:49,929 --> 00:08:50,499
Calm down, Jordan.
254
00:08:50,447 --> 00:08:52,857
Help!
(gasping)
255
00:08:52,932 --> 00:08:54,112
Doctor, doctor,
he's faking.
256
00:08:54,183 --> 00:08:55,323
I know when he's faking.
257
00:08:55,393 --> 00:08:56,783
I get him to do
that all the time.
258
00:08:56,853 --> 00:08:59,663
When I want to get
out of dinner with the Richters, I...
259
00:08:59,739 --> 00:09:02,369
You are lucky we are
in an emergency room.
260
00:09:02,442 --> 00:09:04,172
(Jordan choking, gasping)
261
00:09:04,244 --> 00:09:05,424
Knock it off, Jordan.
262
00:09:05,495 --> 00:09:07,615
Knock it off before
I knock it off for you!
263
00:09:07,697 --> 00:09:09,497
Son, you can tell me.
264
00:09:09,574 --> 00:09:10,924
How did you really
hurt your shoulder?
265
00:09:11,001 --> 00:09:13,001
What do you mean
by that, man?
266
00:09:13,077 --> 00:09:14,137
Hey.
267
00:09:16,873 --> 00:09:22,303
Look, Jordan, I-I'm gonna
go to X-ray with you, okay?
268
00:09:22,378 --> 00:09:24,638
Thank you,
Uncle Bernie. Okay.
269
00:09:24,714 --> 00:09:25,854
I'm so scared.
I'll be back, babe...
270
00:09:25,923 --> 00:09:27,393
Don't be scared.
I'll be back, okay?
271
00:09:27,467 --> 00:09:28,357
(Jordan screaming)
272
00:09:28,435 --> 00:09:29,385
Come on, shh.
273
00:09:29,469 --> 00:09:31,349
That sneaky little...
274
00:09:31,429 --> 00:09:34,399
America, you see how he tried
to blackmail me?
275
00:09:34,408 --> 00:09:36,438
Whining, wheezing weasel.
276
00:09:36,517 --> 00:09:38,477
All he did was separate
his shoulder.
277
00:09:38,495 --> 00:09:40,225
It's not like he needs
stem cells.
278
00:09:40,305 --> 00:09:43,405
Now I'm missing out on free
drinks and bad lounge music.
279
00:09:43,483 --> 00:09:44,413
(music stops)
280
00:09:44,484 --> 00:09:46,914
I mean, no-no offense.
281
00:09:46,986 --> 00:09:49,706
No-no...
282
00:09:49,789 --> 00:09:51,459
Thank you.
Yeah.
283
00:09:51,532 --> 00:09:54,842
(playing resumes)
284
00:09:57,705 --> 00:09:58,955
Aunt Wanda?
Mm?
285
00:09:58,974 --> 00:10:00,474
Can I ask you a question?
286
00:10:00,541 --> 00:10:02,271
Sure, sweetie,
what is it?
287
00:10:03,586 --> 00:10:07,506
How old were you
when you... changed?
288
00:10:07,590 --> 00:10:09,110
Changed?
289
00:10:10,301 --> 00:10:13,941
Vanessa, you've already
had your... "friend."
290
00:10:14,013 --> 00:10:15,313
No, no.
291
00:10:15,390 --> 00:10:17,450
The other... change.
292
00:10:18,535 --> 00:10:20,605
Oh.
293
00:10:20,687 --> 00:10:22,577
You mean when did I blossom?
294
00:10:22,656 --> 00:10:25,416
Yeah, 'cause I sort of haven't
295
00:10:25,492 --> 00:10:28,532
and a lot of
the other girls have.
296
00:10:28,545 --> 00:10:29,825
And there was this party
297
00:10:29,904 --> 00:10:32,214
that I really wanted
to go to tonight, but...
298
00:10:32,281 --> 00:10:33,511
You feel self-conscious?
299
00:10:33,583 --> 00:10:35,923
Hmm.
300
00:10:35,993 --> 00:10:39,843
Well, there's
no escaping 14.
301
00:10:39,914 --> 00:10:41,164
Every girl goes
through something.
302
00:10:41,232 --> 00:10:43,632
For me, it was
actually the opposite.
303
00:10:43,710 --> 00:10:48,510
I was the first one to develop,
and I was a stick with boobs.
304
00:10:48,589 --> 00:10:51,139
Ooh, do you know how
that made me feel?
305
00:10:51,151 --> 00:10:52,571
Popular?
306
00:10:52,644 --> 00:10:54,444
Uh, no, that would
be 16, when the rest of me filled out.
307
00:10:54,521 --> 00:10:55,451
(laughing)
308
00:10:55,522 --> 00:10:59,402
But 14, I remember
it was hell.
309
00:10:59,475 --> 00:11:01,815
I was self-conscious.
310
00:11:01,894 --> 00:11:03,364
I was embarrassed.
311
00:11:03,438 --> 00:11:06,908
And when they first
came in, oh, they hurt.
312
00:11:06,983 --> 00:11:08,663
So, what did you do?
313
00:11:08,735 --> 00:11:09,905
I accepted it.
314
00:11:09,986 --> 00:11:12,196
And I went to parties.
315
00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:13,080
Like you will.
316
00:11:13,156 --> 00:11:16,746
Look, they have free candy here.
317
00:11:16,826 --> 00:11:17,956
Don't make no doggone sense.
318
00:11:18,035 --> 00:11:20,095
I'm sitting up here,
they gonna tell me
319
00:11:20,171 --> 00:11:22,551
they ain't got no doggone
doctors all up in...!
320
00:11:22,623 --> 00:11:23,683
I'll be doggone.
321
00:11:23,758 --> 00:11:25,218
No wonder they ain't
got no doctors.
322
00:11:25,293 --> 00:11:26,843
They all in the same
doggone room.
323
00:11:26,919 --> 00:11:28,179
Hey, hey!
Come on, man!
324
00:11:28,254 --> 00:11:29,854
I got a shoulder
I'm dealing with, man
325
00:11:29,922 --> 00:11:31,602
and a flight to catch
to Sin City.
326
00:11:31,674 --> 00:11:33,604
Come on, man.
I got ringside seats.
327
00:11:33,676 --> 00:11:35,026
Five hours, America.
328
00:11:35,103 --> 00:11:37,273
Five hours I lost
to that damn hospital.
329
00:11:37,346 --> 00:11:39,646
The boy just had
a dislocated shoulder.
330
00:11:39,658 --> 00:11:41,068
Finally, I did get a doctor.
331
00:11:41,151 --> 00:11:42,781
I mean, it took two seconds
332
00:11:42,852 --> 00:11:44,532
and one good shove
to relocate it.
333
00:11:44,604 --> 00:11:45,954
I could've done that hours ago.
334
00:11:46,030 --> 00:11:48,360
Well, America, that's it.
335
00:11:48,441 --> 00:11:49,991
I've done my duty.
336
00:11:50,067 --> 00:11:52,327
Jordan and baby girl
are exhausted in bed
337
00:11:52,403 --> 00:11:54,633
and I'm gonna drop Nessa off
at the party
338
00:11:54,706 --> 00:11:56,336
en route to the airport.
339
00:11:56,416 --> 00:11:59,746
And then, and only then,
I'm off the clock.
340
00:11:59,827 --> 00:12:01,417
(chuckles)
I'm going to Vegas.
341
00:12:01,496 --> 00:12:02,996
I'm gonna have me a good time.
342
00:12:03,080 --> 00:12:04,630
I'm gonna take in a couple
of shows.
343
00:12:04,641 --> 00:12:05,971
Who can I see?
344
00:12:06,042 --> 00:12:07,972
My boy Don Rickles is there.
345
00:12:08,044 --> 00:12:11,054
Don, I'm comin', baby!
346
00:12:11,064 --> 00:12:13,864
( upbeat music playing)
347
00:12:13,933 --> 00:12:15,313
All right, Nessa.
348
00:12:15,384 --> 00:12:16,484
Come on. I'm in a hurry.
349
00:12:16,552 --> 00:12:17,912
I've got to go.
350
00:12:17,987 --> 00:12:18,937
You in or out?
What you gonna do?
351
00:12:19,013 --> 00:12:20,313
(sighs)
Fine.
352
00:12:20,389 --> 00:12:22,819
Have fun on your trip.
353
00:12:22,892 --> 00:12:23,862
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
354
00:12:23,935 --> 00:12:25,985
Come on. Close the door.
(door closes)
355
00:12:26,062 --> 00:12:27,602
I can't let you
go like that.
356
00:12:27,680 --> 00:12:29,710
Look, Nessa, Aunt Wanda
told me about your problem.
357
00:12:29,783 --> 00:12:32,663
She told me about this
whole puberty thing.
358
00:12:32,669 --> 00:12:34,219
I don't mean
it like that.
359
00:12:34,295 --> 00:12:35,655
I'm saying, your mama had
a board chest all the way up
360
00:12:35,672 --> 00:12:36,952
till she was 24 years old.
361
00:12:37,023 --> 00:12:38,673
What?
They used to call her "Mister."
362
00:12:38,750 --> 00:12:40,260
What I'm trying to say
363
00:12:40,335 --> 00:12:42,385
is, baby, some people develop
quicker than others.
364
00:12:45,673 --> 00:12:46,763
Well, look,
365
00:12:46,833 --> 00:12:48,013
we'll talk about it, ok?
366
00:12:48,084 --> 00:12:49,114
So what you gonna?
367
00:12:49,185 --> 00:12:50,345
You gonna stay
or you gonna go?
368
00:12:52,964 --> 00:12:54,474
Just take me home.
369
00:12:54,483 --> 00:12:56,193
Okay.
(engine starting)
370
00:13:02,431 --> 00:13:03,901
(Bryana screaming)
371
00:13:03,909 --> 00:13:05,529
BERNIE:
What the...? What's that?
372
00:13:05,610 --> 00:13:06,820
(Bryana crying)
373
00:13:06,894 --> 00:13:08,784
Hey, hey, hey, what's happening?
374
00:13:08,855 --> 00:13:09,655
(crying continues)
375
00:13:09,739 --> 00:13:10,949
What's going on?
376
00:13:11,023 --> 00:13:13,373
(crying)
I had a scary dream.
377
00:13:13,376 --> 00:13:15,866
Oh, baby girl,
you just had a nightmare.
378
00:13:15,945 --> 00:13:17,535
Go back to sleep.
379
00:13:17,613 --> 00:13:19,833
Come on now.
380
00:13:19,907 --> 00:13:22,457
No, but you have to do
a monster search.
381
00:13:22,535 --> 00:13:25,585
Baby girl, I ain't got no time
to do no monster search.
382
00:13:25,663 --> 00:13:26,883
Maybe Aunt Wanda
can do it.
383
00:13:26,956 --> 00:13:28,756
Baby, read her a book
so she can go back to bed.
384
00:13:28,833 --> 00:13:30,553
Oh, uh-uh,
Bernie, I tried.
385
00:13:30,626 --> 00:13:31,926
Apparently, the zombie
386
00:13:31,937 --> 00:13:34,097
in the R-rated movie
you took her to
387
00:13:34,105 --> 00:13:37,185
ate the pretty black lady
so this is all you, baby.
388
00:13:37,267 --> 00:13:39,727
You can snuggle up to her
to another scary movie.
389
00:13:39,802 --> 00:13:40,812
That don't make no sense,
390
00:13:40,887 --> 00:13:43,647
taking no baby to no
R-rated scary movie.
391
00:13:43,723 --> 00:13:44,903
I told you, America.
392
00:13:44,974 --> 00:13:46,274
Conspiracy.
393
00:13:46,350 --> 00:13:48,900
I... thanks.
(piano playing softly)
394
00:13:48,978 --> 00:13:51,108
You staying
at the hotel?
395
00:13:51,188 --> 00:13:52,068
Not yet.
396
00:13:52,148 --> 00:13:53,578
Then that'll be
$7.50.
397
00:13:53,658 --> 00:13:55,278
Uh... what?
398
00:13:55,359 --> 00:13:57,119
$7.50.
399
00:13:57,128 --> 00:13:59,048
But...
400
00:14:01,490 --> 00:14:02,420
Damn.
401
00:14:04,719 --> 00:14:06,989
I'm missing everything.
402
00:14:10,791 --> 00:14:13,091
Well, I did the monster search.
403
00:14:13,169 --> 00:14:15,139
Surprise, America-- no monsters.
404
00:14:15,146 --> 00:14:16,596
But could I leave? No.
405
00:14:16,681 --> 00:14:20,521
That miserable boy told her
the monsters were invisible.
406
00:14:20,593 --> 00:14:23,063
(falsetto)
"Protect me, Uncle Bernie. Protect me."
407
00:14:23,137 --> 00:14:25,097
Yeah, but who protect me
from them, America?
408
00:14:25,181 --> 00:14:26,441
That's the question.
409
00:14:26,515 --> 00:14:28,105
I'm the one
in serious danger here,
410
00:14:28,118 --> 00:14:30,108
and if I don't get
on that next flight,
411
00:14:30,186 --> 00:14:31,856
I'm going
to miss the main event.
412
00:14:31,872 --> 00:14:33,702
Well, I'm going
to tell you something.
413
00:14:33,773 --> 00:14:34,823
I don't care.
414
00:14:34,899 --> 00:14:36,069
I'm going to Vegas.
415
00:14:36,150 --> 00:14:37,950
Even if I do miss the fight,
416
00:14:38,027 --> 00:14:40,117
my main man Chuy just called me
and told me
417
00:14:40,130 --> 00:14:41,580
there's going to be
a after party,
418
00:14:41,656 --> 00:14:44,076
and I'll just go there
and hang with the champ, Denzel,
419
00:14:44,158 --> 00:14:45,878
and all the rest of them
whoever there.
420
00:14:45,886 --> 00:14:47,656
Oh, it's still on, America.
421
00:14:47,736 --> 00:14:51,376
As soon as that little pigtail-
wearing stinker falls asleep...
422
00:14:51,457 --> 00:14:52,637
I'm gone.
423
00:14:57,129 --> 00:14:58,639
Where are you going?
424
00:14:58,648 --> 00:14:59,888
Baby girl,
I'm not going anywhere.
425
00:14:59,900 --> 00:15:01,720
I'm just switching
butt cheeks.
426
00:15:01,801 --> 00:15:04,531
Oh, Uncle Bernie,
my shoulder hurts.
427
00:15:04,604 --> 00:15:07,154
All right, I'll get you
some more medicine.
428
00:15:07,223 --> 00:15:09,273
But the monster will get us.
429
00:15:09,350 --> 00:15:12,150
Oh, oh, baby girl, there ain't
no monster gonna get you.
430
00:15:12,228 --> 00:15:13,308
I'll tell you what.
431
00:15:13,388 --> 00:15:14,328
I'll build a big force field
right here
432
00:15:14,405 --> 00:15:15,815
to protect you till I get back.
433
00:15:15,898 --> 00:15:17,488
Yay!
Yay.
434
00:15:17,566 --> 00:15:18,986
That's it, huh?
435
00:15:18,668 --> 00:15:21,618
All right, just stay there
till I get back...
436
00:15:21,696 --> 00:15:23,296
with your medicine.
437
00:15:47,972 --> 00:15:50,112
Wow.
438
00:15:50,182 --> 00:15:54,782
Baby girl
sure do like applesauce.
439
00:15:54,854 --> 00:15:58,204
I bet if I mi...
440
00:15:58,208 --> 00:16:00,568
Why you always got
to be watching me, America?!
441
00:16:00,651 --> 00:16:03,871
Is there no privacy
in my own damn house?
442
00:16:03,880 --> 00:16:05,160
You're like Big Brother.
443
00:16:05,173 --> 00:16:06,833
All right, son, here you go.
444
00:16:06,907 --> 00:16:08,117
Here go your medicine.
445
00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:09,590
Knock yourself out,
446
00:16:09,669 --> 00:16:11,049
and I mean that literally.
447
00:16:11,129 --> 00:16:12,879
How you doing, baby girl?
Are you okay?
448
00:16:12,955 --> 00:16:15,795
Good. I got my force field,
and nothing can come in.
449
00:16:15,875 --> 00:16:17,385
All right, you sure do.
450
00:16:17,268 --> 00:16:19,338
You got your force field,
and can't nothing get in.
451
00:16:19,354 --> 00:16:22,224
In that case,
I'll see y'all tomo...
452
00:16:22,298 --> 00:16:23,628
Ha! Some force field.
453
00:16:23,707 --> 00:16:25,357
Can't even keep out
a stupid stuffed rabbit.
454
00:16:25,435 --> 00:16:26,175
(chortling)
455
00:16:26,260 --> 00:16:28,230
Uncle Bernie!
456
00:16:28,238 --> 00:16:29,778
Turn over, turn over.
457
00:16:35,770 --> 00:16:37,450
Bernie?
Hmm?
458
00:16:37,521 --> 00:16:39,011
Hey.
Hey.
459
00:16:38,957 --> 00:16:40,817
You've really gone all out
for the kids today.
460
00:16:40,900 --> 00:16:41,990
Okay.
461
00:16:42,002 --> 00:16:43,412
No, baby,
why don't you go,
462
00:16:43,486 --> 00:16:46,696
and if she wakes up,
I'll take care of her.
463
00:16:46,781 --> 00:16:47,911
What? Really?
464
00:16:47,924 --> 00:16:49,804
Yes.
Oh, baby...
465
00:16:56,540 --> 00:17:00,010
Finally! No one can stop me now.
466
00:17:00,020 --> 00:17:01,800
Those little ingrates
don't even know
467
00:17:01,813 --> 00:17:03,093
how lucky they are.
468
00:17:03,164 --> 00:17:04,854
See, a different parent
might not care so much.
469
00:17:04,924 --> 00:17:06,604
Would have been in Vegas
hours ago.
470
00:17:06,675 --> 00:17:08,555
Now, that's my New Year's
resolution--
471
00:17:08,636 --> 00:17:10,896
cut out the fatty food,
care less about the kids.
472
00:17:10,971 --> 00:17:12,271
I'm out of here.
473
00:17:12,282 --> 00:17:15,282
Yes, sir, let me see
what's going on.
474
00:17:22,042 --> 00:17:24,122
WOMAN:
Good evening,ladies and gentlemen.
475
00:17:24,193 --> 00:17:25,813
At this time,the captain requests
476
00:17:25,887 --> 00:17:28,797
that all cell phones,pagers and electronic devices
477
00:17:28,873 --> 00:17:30,163
be turned off.
478
00:17:30,241 --> 00:17:31,791
(phone ringing)
479
00:17:31,801 --> 00:17:33,301
Oh, damn.
480
00:17:35,996 --> 00:17:36,996
Sir, I'm sorry,
481
00:17:37,081 --> 00:17:38,261
but that's going
to have to remain off.
482
00:17:38,332 --> 00:17:39,212
I-I'll be real quick.
483
00:17:39,284 --> 00:17:40,134
I got a phone call.
484
00:17:40,209 --> 00:17:42,889
Oh, yes,
it's FAA regulation.
485
00:17:42,962 --> 00:17:44,482
Okay.
486
00:17:47,216 --> 00:17:48,846
It's probably the boys
calling, you know,
487
00:17:48,860 --> 00:17:50,860
trying to find out
where I am.
488
00:17:52,096 --> 00:17:53,276
But what if it's not?
489
00:17:55,724 --> 00:18:02,624
♪ ♪
490
00:18:10,990 --> 00:18:16,510
♪ ♪
491
00:18:42,771 --> 00:18:45,741
The problem is...
492
00:18:45,750 --> 00:18:48,620
I do care about them.
493
00:18:48,694 --> 00:18:50,204
Damn.
494
00:18:50,279 --> 00:18:51,869
America, I love them.
495
00:18:51,947 --> 00:18:57,547
♪ ♪
496
00:19:14,178 --> 00:19:16,358
(yawning)
497
00:19:21,644 --> 00:19:23,244
Hey, baby girl.
498
00:19:23,312 --> 00:19:24,742
Looks like
499
00:19:24,813 --> 00:19:26,323
we made it, huh?
500
00:19:26,398 --> 00:19:28,238
It's light out now.
501
00:19:28,317 --> 00:19:30,237
You'll be all right.
502
00:19:30,319 --> 00:19:33,419
(groaning)
503
00:19:41,997 --> 00:19:43,467
Uncle Bernie?
504
00:19:45,376 --> 00:19:47,306
And I love you, too.
505
00:19:51,257 --> 00:19:53,067
(chuckles softly)
506
00:19:53,142 --> 00:19:54,282
Nessa.
507
00:19:56,595 --> 00:19:58,435
You used my phone yesterday,
didn't you?
508
00:19:58,448 --> 00:20:01,188
You're waking me up
to yell at me?
509
00:20:01,267 --> 00:20:04,317
You got a message on my phone
from some girl named Donna.
510
00:20:04,395 --> 00:20:07,695
And then Todd got on the phone
and started talking.
511
00:20:07,773 --> 00:20:09,623
What did he say?
512
00:20:09,692 --> 00:20:11,062
Well, he said
513
00:20:11,135 --> 00:20:12,195
that he wondered
why you wasn't at the party,
514
00:20:12,278 --> 00:20:13,078
and that he's seen you
515
00:20:13,153 --> 00:20:14,083
in school-
you know.
516
00:20:14,154 --> 00:20:15,924
Well, how did he say it?
517
00:20:19,469 --> 00:20:21,299
The boy like you, okay?
518
00:20:24,456 --> 00:20:25,926
Now, go on back to bed.
519
00:20:30,629 --> 00:20:32,549
America, this whole time
520
00:20:32,631 --> 00:20:34,101
I thought my fight
was with those kids,
521
00:20:34,174 --> 00:20:35,854
but it wasn't.
522
00:20:35,926 --> 00:20:37,246
It was with myself.
523
00:20:37,328 --> 00:20:39,138
Between the part of me
that wants to enjoy myself
524
00:20:39,221 --> 00:20:42,401
with no strings, and the part
that's a good parent.
525
00:20:42,474 --> 00:20:44,494
See, America,
personal growth and maturity
526
00:20:44,568 --> 00:20:46,068
can be irritating as hell.
527
00:20:46,145 --> 00:20:47,365
Oh, yeah, I know.
528
00:20:47,446 --> 00:20:49,066
But did you see the look
in baby girl eyes
529
00:20:49,148 --> 00:20:50,568
when she saw me sitting there?
530
00:20:50,649 --> 00:20:53,249
Or the smile on Nessa face
just then?
531
00:20:53,327 --> 00:20:54,797
Now, I don't know if I enjoy it
532
00:20:54,878 --> 00:20:56,868
as much as seeing Hudson
beat the tar out of Turner,
533
00:20:56,947 --> 00:20:58,207
but it's close.
534
00:20:58,282 --> 00:20:59,472
Real close.
535
00:21:06,415 --> 00:21:09,585
Oh, baby, baby, baby.
536
00:21:09,668 --> 00:21:12,018
Mmm. Honey, you're home early.
537
00:21:12,096 --> 00:21:13,886
Mm-hmm.
538
00:21:13,964 --> 00:21:15,314
How was the fight?
539
00:21:15,391 --> 00:21:17,401
The best man won.
540
00:21:23,182 --> 00:21:25,622
Captioned by VISUAL DATA
541
00:21:47,039 --> 00:21:47,969
Little Richard.
542
00:21:48,019 --> 00:21:52,569
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