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1
00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:33,992
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
2
00:00:37,746 --> 00:00:40,790
(SNORING)
3
00:00:49,090 --> 00:00:51,134
(SNORING CONTINUES)
4
00:00:53,928 --> 00:00:55,263
(GROANING)
5
00:00:55,972 --> 00:00:58,641
(CHUCKLING)
6
00:00:58,725 --> 00:01:00,643
WOODY: (MUMBLING) Wood.
7
00:01:00,727 --> 00:01:02,103
(SMACKING LIPS)
8
00:01:02,228 --> 00:01:04,814
Peanut butter. Oh, yeah, peanut butter.
9
00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:06,983
I love peanut butter.
10
00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:08,109
(SMACKING TONGUE)
11
00:01:08,193 --> 00:01:09,819
-(GUNSHOTS)
-(GASPS) Huh?
12
00:01:09,903 --> 00:01:11,112
Did you hear that?
13
00:01:11,196 --> 00:01:13,865
Yeah, me, too. Better go check it out.
14
00:01:14,574 --> 00:01:17,160
NATE: Yeah, no poaching. (SCOFFS)
15
00:01:18,119 --> 00:01:19,788
(SNIFFS AND CLEARS THROAT)
16
00:01:31,758 --> 00:01:33,426
(RUSTLING)
17
00:01:38,306 --> 00:01:39,599
(OTIS CHUCKLES)
18
00:01:39,683 --> 00:01:40,684
(HUSHES)
19
00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:43,812
NATE: Why you gotta eat them
damn things for anyway?
20
00:01:43,895 --> 00:01:44,979
-You're gonna rot your teeth.
-WOODY: Mmm-hmm...
21
00:01:45,063 --> 00:01:47,190
Poachers in my forest!
22
00:01:47,273 --> 00:01:49,067
This ought to be fun. Game on.
23
00:01:49,234 --> 00:01:50,985
(LAUGHING)
24
00:01:52,404 --> 00:01:54,406
Hello, boys. Guess who?
25
00:01:54,489 --> 00:01:55,865
What in the hell kind of bird is that?
26
00:01:55,949 --> 00:01:57,325
WOODY: I'm gonna give
you guys five seconds...
27
00:01:57,409 --> 00:01:58,535
It sure is angry about something.
28
00:01:58,618 --> 00:01:59,661
...to get you and your guns outta here.
29
00:01:59,744 --> 00:02:01,371
-NATE: Well, it ain't no eagle...
-Do you hear me? (GRUNTING)
30
00:02:01,454 --> 00:02:05,542
But somebody will surely pay
to have it stuffed.
31
00:02:05,625 --> 00:02:08,962
Guns? Oh, no. What ever will I do?
32
00:02:11,089 --> 00:02:12,173
Toro! Toro!
33
00:02:12,257 --> 00:02:13,258
Olé!
34
00:02:14,050 --> 00:02:16,094
Come on! That the best you got?
35
00:02:16,177 --> 00:02:17,178
Shoot him!
36
00:02:17,679 --> 00:02:19,180
(WHISTLES) Over here now!
37
00:02:23,601 --> 00:02:24,644
Nice shot.
38
00:02:24,728 --> 00:02:27,814
Now let's try this with a moving target!
39
00:02:27,897 --> 00:02:28,982
NATE: Reload! Come on! Reload!
40
00:02:29,107 --> 00:02:30,108
WOODY: Yoo-hoo!
41
00:02:30,191 --> 00:02:31,901
Looking for me? Whoa!
42
00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:33,319
Too slow. Gotta go.
43
00:02:33,403 --> 00:02:34,404
Over there! There he is.
44
00:02:34,487 --> 00:02:35,488
Marco?
45
00:02:35,572 --> 00:02:36,906
Polo!
46
00:02:39,367 --> 00:02:40,952
Peekaboo! Over here!
47
00:02:41,036 --> 00:02:42,662
NATE: Gotcha! (LAUGHS)
48
00:02:42,746 --> 00:02:45,790
Okay, boys.
You got me fair and square. I give up.
49
00:02:46,791 --> 00:02:47,959
-Not!
-(GRUNTS)
50
00:02:50,462 --> 00:02:51,880
-(GRUNTS)
-Nighty-night, boys.
51
00:02:53,465 --> 00:02:56,092
(GROGGILY) Did you...
52
00:02:57,010 --> 00:02:58,011
(GROANS)
53
00:02:58,094 --> 00:03:00,764
And I'm the one with a brain
the size of a walnut?
54
00:03:00,847 --> 00:03:01,848
Puh-lease!
55
00:03:01,931 --> 00:03:04,017
(MUSIC PLAYING)
56
00:03:08,438 --> 00:03:10,482
(LAUGHING)
57
00:03:24,871 --> 00:03:26,581
(APPLAUSE)
58
00:03:27,874 --> 00:03:29,042
STAFF: (CHANTS) Speech! Speech! Speech!
59
00:03:29,709 --> 00:03:31,628
All right, all right, all right.
60
00:03:31,711 --> 00:03:32,796
Now, raise your glasses,
61
00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:35,799
and here's to our victory
and here's to our team.
62
00:03:35,882 --> 00:03:37,425
Barb, come on in. Join the party.
63
00:03:37,509 --> 00:03:39,928
Actually, Lance, we need to talk.
64
00:03:40,720 --> 00:03:41,971
LANCE: Terminated?
65
00:03:42,055 --> 00:03:45,308
I just won a case for this firm
worth millions, and I'm being terminated?
66
00:03:46,434 --> 00:03:49,354
...another thing.
Since when do we need to be
67
00:03:49,437 --> 00:03:51,523
so overly concerned
with the rights of wildlife?
68
00:03:51,606 --> 00:03:52,774
Wildlife don't vote.
69
00:03:53,358 --> 00:03:55,110
Wildlife don't pay taxes.
70
00:03:55,193 --> 00:03:57,612
Big Oil creates big jobs.
71
00:03:57,696 --> 00:03:59,781
When's the last time
you ever saw a bear create a job?
72
00:04:01,408 --> 00:04:03,702
Barb, come on.
73
00:04:03,785 --> 00:04:07,288
Fifteen years of
busting my butt for this firm.
74
00:04:07,372 --> 00:04:11,001
Not to mention,
the biggest case you've ever won.
75
00:04:11,459 --> 00:04:12,919
And you're gonna fire me?
76
00:04:14,129 --> 00:04:15,338
VANESSA: Fired?
77
00:04:16,131 --> 00:04:17,799
They can't do that.
78
00:04:17,882 --> 00:04:20,176
Actually, turns out they can.
79
00:04:20,635 --> 00:04:22,262
(SIGHS) We will sue.
80
00:04:22,345 --> 00:04:24,973
Sue one of the toughest
law firms in the country?
81
00:04:25,056 --> 00:04:26,349
Not a great idea.
82
00:04:26,725 --> 00:04:29,394
Don't worry, baby. I got a plan.
83
00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:33,314
Are you gonna smear them on social media?
84
00:04:33,398 --> 00:04:34,941
I was thinking something
a little more mature.
85
00:04:35,025 --> 00:04:36,109
Mmm.
86
00:04:36,192 --> 00:04:38,945
My grandfather left me
an amazing piece of property
87
00:04:39,029 --> 00:04:40,196
right up near the Canadian border.
88
00:04:40,822 --> 00:04:43,992
We are going to create a country estate.
89
00:04:44,075 --> 00:04:45,076
Look at me.
90
00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:46,244
Look what I'm wearing.
91
00:04:46,327 --> 00:04:48,079
(STAMMERS) I can't. I'm a city girl!
92
00:04:48,163 --> 00:04:49,414
We're not gonna live in it.
93
00:04:49,497 --> 00:04:51,082
We're gonna flip it.
94
00:04:51,166 --> 00:04:54,169
Take a huge profit.
I'm gonna start my own firm.
95
00:04:54,252 --> 00:04:56,421
Success is the best revenge.
96
00:04:56,838 --> 00:04:58,381
NATE: Nope. Nope.
97
00:04:59,549 --> 00:05:01,760
That's it! That's the one we saw!
98
00:05:01,843 --> 00:05:05,138
(STUTTERS) "The pileated
red-crowned woodpecker.
99
00:05:05,221 --> 00:05:07,349
"Thought to be extinct... (CHUCKLES)
100
00:05:07,432 --> 00:05:09,851
"Last one sold on the black market for..."
101
00:05:10,268 --> 00:05:11,394
(COUGHS)
102
00:05:11,478 --> 00:05:15,607
Get this. $500,000!
103
00:05:16,191 --> 00:05:19,110
OTIS: Holy moly! I could
buy me that blue suede tux.
104
00:05:19,611 --> 00:05:21,029
Or one of them monster trucks.
105
00:05:21,988 --> 00:05:25,367
All I know is that bird
is out there in the woods someplace,
106
00:05:25,450 --> 00:05:27,786
just waiting for us to bag it!
107
00:05:28,286 --> 00:05:29,788
-(CHUCKLING)
-(INHALES SHARPLY)
108
00:05:30,622 --> 00:05:31,623
(IMITATES GUNSHOT)
109
00:05:32,540 --> 00:05:34,834
(SIGHS) Home sweet home!
110
00:05:34,918 --> 00:05:37,003
And no one around to bother me.
111
00:05:40,340 --> 00:05:42,467
(BELCHES)
112
00:05:48,556 --> 00:05:50,684
And this is gonna be great.
I gotta tell you,
113
00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:52,102
this is the first time in a long time
114
00:05:52,185 --> 00:05:53,978
I'm actually excited about something.
115
00:05:54,062 --> 00:05:55,063
(GASPS) Careful.
116
00:05:56,272 --> 00:05:57,273
Oh.
117
00:05:58,191 --> 00:06:01,277
Lance, look who is here.
118
00:06:03,113 --> 00:06:06,116
Linda! What a nice surprise.
119
00:06:06,199 --> 00:06:07,492
May we come in?
120
00:06:07,575 --> 00:06:09,119
Of course.
121
00:06:10,495 --> 00:06:12,288
Hey, Tommy. How you doing, bud?
122
00:06:17,210 --> 00:06:18,628
LINDA: My dad is in the hospital.
123
00:06:18,878 --> 00:06:21,840
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
I always liked your dad
124
00:06:21,923 --> 00:06:23,550
even though he hates my guts.
125
00:06:23,633 --> 00:06:24,843
He doesn't hate your guts.
126
00:06:24,926 --> 00:06:27,846
No, he told me.
He actually said, "I hate your guts."
127
00:06:27,929 --> 00:06:29,472
It's a little hard to misinterpret that.
128
00:06:29,556 --> 00:06:32,308
Look, I'm leaving on a flight
to Philadelphia at 10:00.
129
00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:35,186
I need your help. I need you
to watch Tommy for a while.
130
00:06:35,270 --> 00:06:37,397
-LANCE: Uh...
-(MOUTHING) No way. No.
131
00:06:39,315 --> 00:06:41,985
If this were any other time,
I would be happy to help.
132
00:06:42,068 --> 00:06:43,778
-But this is not any other time.
-(MUSIC VOLUME INCREASES)
133
00:06:43,862 --> 00:06:45,989
I'm sorry my dad didn't ask
134
00:06:46,072 --> 00:06:49,367
if it was convenient for you
before he had a stroke.
135
00:06:49,909 --> 00:06:50,910
(INDISTINCT)
136
00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:52,829
LANCE: I'm starting construction
on a big project.
137
00:06:52,912 --> 00:06:53,997
Can't you just take him with you?
138
00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:56,875
No, I have a family crisis.
139
00:06:56,958 --> 00:06:59,669
You hardly ever see your son!
140
00:06:59,753 --> 00:07:03,673
It is time for you to step up to the plate
and do your part.
141
00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:05,091
You know what? I'm sorry, Linda.
142
00:07:05,175 --> 00:07:07,552
The timing is just really bad.
I can't do it.
143
00:07:07,635 --> 00:07:09,679
I'm sorry, I would like to help you,
but I can't.
144
00:07:09,763 --> 00:07:11,306
And that's final.
145
00:07:11,556 --> 00:07:13,099
My hands were tied. You saw that.
146
00:07:13,183 --> 00:07:17,020
Yeah, I know. But I'm not a kid person.
147
00:07:18,355 --> 00:07:19,939
Even when I was a kid.
148
00:07:21,358 --> 00:07:23,109
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
149
00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:32,702
(SCATTING)
150
00:07:35,121 --> 00:07:38,958
I need a Xanny.
I feel a migraine coming on.
151
00:07:43,213 --> 00:07:44,589
LANCE: Hey, Tommy.
152
00:07:46,966 --> 00:07:49,177
Tommy, take off your headphones, please.
153
00:07:50,011 --> 00:07:52,972
Look, it's not that I don't
appreciate the drumming,
154
00:07:53,056 --> 00:07:55,517
because it's awesome.
155
00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:59,562
But can you maybe drop it down
a few decibels, please?
156
00:07:59,646 --> 00:08:02,649
Fine. I won't play ever again.
157
00:08:02,732 --> 00:08:04,192
Happy now, Lance?
158
00:08:04,776 --> 00:08:06,069
"Lance"?
159
00:08:06,152 --> 00:08:07,487
What happened to "Dad"?
160
00:08:07,570 --> 00:08:09,447
I know you don't want me here.
161
00:08:09,531 --> 00:08:12,534
The only kid you want in your life
is your girlfriend.
162
00:08:12,617 --> 00:08:15,829
You know what,
Vanessa is not a kid. She's much...
163
00:08:17,247 --> 00:08:19,541
Much older-ish than you are.
164
00:08:20,417 --> 00:08:22,460
Look, your mom's right.
165
00:08:23,920 --> 00:08:26,840
We haven't had a chance
to spend much time together lately.
166
00:08:26,923 --> 00:08:31,928
So we can just look at this trip
as an opportunity to bond.
167
00:08:32,387 --> 00:08:33,388
(SCOFFS)
168
00:08:33,763 --> 00:08:35,890
(ROCK MUSIC CONTINUES ON HEADPHONES)
169
00:08:36,766 --> 00:08:37,851
Good talk.
170
00:08:53,199 --> 00:08:54,826
LANCE: Well, we are here.
171
00:08:55,452 --> 00:08:58,872
By "here," do you mean middle of nowhere?
172
00:08:58,955 --> 00:09:00,457
Just wait till you see it.
173
00:09:06,129 --> 00:09:10,050
Oh, come on. Would you just look at this?
174
00:09:11,343 --> 00:09:14,137
Pristine, untouched.
175
00:09:15,347 --> 00:09:18,600
I cannot wait to get a bulldozer in here
and start building.
176
00:09:18,683 --> 00:09:20,310
Petty exciting, huh, bud?
177
00:09:20,393 --> 00:09:21,394
Yay.
178
00:09:21,478 --> 00:09:22,979
I'm telling you, baby,
179
00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:26,399
if a house on this site
does not quadruple our investment,
180
00:09:26,483 --> 00:09:27,567
I don't know what will.
181
00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:29,069
Come here, let me show you.
182
00:09:29,152 --> 00:09:30,570
Uh, Lance, these shoes...
183
00:09:30,653 --> 00:09:32,614
Baby, wait,
my shoes are not made for that!
184
00:09:32,697 --> 00:09:35,617
Okay, so the front door
is gonna be somewhere about here.
185
00:09:35,700 --> 00:09:37,160
And then...
186
00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:38,411
Boom!
187
00:09:39,037 --> 00:09:42,165
Two-story vaulted ceiling,
stunning view of the river,
188
00:09:42,248 --> 00:09:44,876
opens up to a state-of-the-art kitchen.
189
00:09:45,669 --> 00:09:47,504
-TOMMY: Awesome!
-I know, right?
190
00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:49,422
I'm getting five bars!
191
00:09:49,506 --> 00:09:52,092
Five bars! Yeah, that is awesome.
192
00:09:52,717 --> 00:09:54,052
Ah!
193
00:09:54,803 --> 00:09:55,804
LANCE: Let's go.
194
00:09:55,887 --> 00:09:59,057
This place really needs to be fumigated.
195
00:09:59,516 --> 00:10:01,142
(WOODY EXCLAIMING)
196
00:10:01,476 --> 00:10:05,522
Oh, campers!
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
197
00:10:05,855 --> 00:10:07,649
Mmm, there's granola bars, corn chips,
198
00:10:07,732 --> 00:10:09,734
ice cream, snack cakes, corn nuts,
199
00:10:09,818 --> 00:10:11,319
et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.
200
00:10:59,325 --> 00:11:00,785
Grill's ready!
201
00:11:02,912 --> 00:11:04,414
(LAUGHS)
202
00:11:05,081 --> 00:11:07,334
-Don't you dare post that.
-Too late.
203
00:11:07,417 --> 00:11:10,670
#epicdadgrillfail
204
00:11:10,754 --> 00:11:13,840
Mmm, it is so coffee o'clock.
205
00:11:13,923 --> 00:11:15,967
Will you make me
a double macchiato, please?
206
00:11:16,051 --> 00:11:17,135
Sure, dear.
207
00:11:17,218 --> 00:11:18,303
(HORN HONKS)
208
00:11:22,515 --> 00:11:24,184
-Hi, there.
-Hi.
209
00:11:24,267 --> 00:11:25,393
Hey, welcome.
210
00:11:26,436 --> 00:11:29,105
You must be Ben Walters' grandson.
211
00:11:29,606 --> 00:11:30,815
How'd you know that?
212
00:11:30,899 --> 00:11:32,942
Because you look exactly like him.
Spitting image.
213
00:11:33,735 --> 00:11:35,862
-You knew my grandfather?
-He came up every summer.
214
00:11:36,613 --> 00:11:38,615
Taught me how to fish on this river.
215
00:11:39,407 --> 00:11:40,658
No kidding.
216
00:11:40,742 --> 00:11:43,036
Shoot. Where are my manners?
I'm Sam Barlett,
217
00:11:43,119 --> 00:11:45,497
Park Ranger in charge of the state land
that surrounds your property.
218
00:11:45,580 --> 00:11:48,041
Lance Walters.
This is my fiancée, Vanessa.
219
00:11:48,124 --> 00:11:49,125
Hi.
220
00:11:49,209 --> 00:11:52,629
That's my son, Tommy,
the mythical half boy, half smartphone.
221
00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:54,214
(VIDEO GAME PLAYING)
222
00:11:54,297 --> 00:11:55,715
Just swung by on my rounds.
223
00:11:55,799 --> 00:11:58,009
We've had a problem
with bird poachers in the area.
224
00:11:58,093 --> 00:12:01,137
So if you see anyone suspicious,
please let me know.
225
00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:02,722
Will do.
226
00:12:02,806 --> 00:12:04,349
I hear you're building a house up here.
227
00:12:04,432 --> 00:12:05,767
Breaking ground tomorrow.
You wanna see it?
228
00:12:11,940 --> 00:12:14,734
It's very blue.
229
00:12:14,818 --> 00:12:17,862
5,000 square feet, every amenity.
230
00:12:17,946 --> 00:12:19,531
And I'm decorating it.
231
00:12:19,614 --> 00:12:20,699
Yeah, you are.
232
00:12:20,782 --> 00:12:23,243
-(CHUCKLES)
-5,000 square feet for three people?
233
00:12:23,326 --> 00:12:24,411
Hope you won't be cramped.
234
00:12:24,494 --> 00:12:27,247
Oh! No. Well, we're not
building it to live in.
235
00:12:27,330 --> 00:12:29,582
I mean, live here?
236
00:12:29,666 --> 00:12:31,126
Uh, get real. (CHUCKLES)
237
00:12:31,209 --> 00:12:33,294
It's an investment property.
We're gonna flip it.
238
00:12:33,378 --> 00:12:34,421
SAM: I see.
239
00:12:34,504 --> 00:12:37,590
Don't you think it'll, kind of,
overwhelm the landscape?
240
00:12:38,425 --> 00:12:40,218
LANCE: I've got government
land on all sides.
241
00:12:40,301 --> 00:12:44,139
Yeah. Not like there are
any neighbors to complain.
242
00:12:44,222 --> 00:12:47,851
All I'm saying is if you were to build
something a bit more modest,
243
00:12:47,934 --> 00:12:49,894
you'd preserve these old growth trees
244
00:12:49,978 --> 00:12:51,438
and be a lot more green-minded.
245
00:12:51,521 --> 00:12:54,649
Well, it's my land, so I'm pretty sure
I can build however I want.
246
00:12:54,733 --> 00:12:57,444
But don't worry,
I'll leave plenty of trees for you to hug.
247
00:12:57,527 --> 00:12:58,820
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
248
00:12:58,903 --> 00:13:02,032
Well. Let me know if you see any poachers.
249
00:13:03,450 --> 00:13:07,162
And good luck with this
Death Star you're building.
250
00:13:09,873 --> 00:13:11,416
Nice meeting you.
251
00:13:14,627 --> 00:13:16,046
Who does she think she is?
252
00:13:16,129 --> 00:13:18,131
I like her. She's cool.
253
00:13:19,090 --> 00:13:21,092
-Ugh.
-Don't worry about it, baby.
254
00:13:23,303 --> 00:13:25,555
Hey, Tommy, come help me
with this stupid grill.
255
00:13:26,473 --> 00:13:32,687
Um, sounds like fun, Lance,
but I think I'm gonna go explore a little.
256
00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:36,066
Like you say,
can't play video games all the time!
257
00:13:37,359 --> 00:13:39,486
Chip off the old block.
258
00:13:39,569 --> 00:13:41,112
Part boy, part lawyer.
259
00:13:43,531 --> 00:13:46,034
How the heck does this thing work?
260
00:13:52,207 --> 00:13:54,459
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING ON SPEAKERS)
261
00:14:06,012 --> 00:14:07,430
(RHYTHMIC PECKING)
262
00:14:11,351 --> 00:14:13,603
-(MUSIC STOPS)
-(DRUMMING AND PECKING)
263
00:14:19,067 --> 00:14:21,152
(DRUMMING RHYTHMICALLY)
264
00:14:21,945 --> 00:14:23,988
(RHYTHM REPEATING)
265
00:14:29,077 --> 00:14:31,162
(RHYTHM REPEATING)
266
00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:35,125
(GRUNTS)
267
00:14:35,208 --> 00:14:36,334
Whoa!
268
00:14:36,418 --> 00:14:37,877
(CONTINUES DRUMMING) Ha-ha!
269
00:14:39,879 --> 00:14:41,589
What the heck are you?
270
00:14:41,673 --> 00:14:44,592
Now, it's your turn.
Come on, kid. Show me what you got.
271
00:14:44,676 --> 00:14:45,677
(LAUGHING)
272
00:14:51,641 --> 00:14:53,893
O-ho! O-ho! Yeah!
273
00:14:53,977 --> 00:14:55,270
(VOCALIZES)
274
00:14:56,354 --> 00:14:58,356
(IMITATING DISK SCRATCHING)
275
00:15:04,571 --> 00:15:05,655
Uh-huh.
276
00:15:05,739 --> 00:15:07,991
(EXCLAIMS) Ta-da!
277
00:15:08,158 --> 00:15:12,245
Wow. You are really cool for a woodpecker.
278
00:15:12,579 --> 00:15:14,039
(SNIFFING)
279
00:15:14,122 --> 00:15:16,332
(GASPS) Are those Peanut Butter Bonkers?
280
00:15:16,416 --> 00:15:18,835
I'm a sucker for peanut butter!
281
00:15:18,918 --> 00:15:21,546
Come on, brother. Share the wealth,
spread the love. Hook me up.
282
00:15:21,629 --> 00:15:23,048
What are you trying to tell me?
283
00:15:23,131 --> 00:15:26,051
Humans. You gotta
spell everything out for them.
284
00:15:29,596 --> 00:15:30,889
Oh. (CHUCKLES)
285
00:15:30,972 --> 00:15:33,141
You're hungry.
You want a Peanut Butter Bonker?
286
00:15:33,224 --> 00:15:34,893
Does a woodpecker peck in the woods?
287
00:15:35,602 --> 00:15:37,187
(CHOMPS AND GULPS)
288
00:15:37,270 --> 00:15:39,522
Whoa! (LAUGHING)
289
00:15:39,606 --> 00:15:40,940
Wa-hoo!
290
00:15:41,358 --> 00:15:42,359
(SIGHS CONTENTEDLY)
291
00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:43,568
You like that, huh?
292
00:15:43,651 --> 00:15:45,820
Even better than beetle larva!
293
00:15:45,904 --> 00:15:48,198
Which if you haven't tried,
is quite good when in season.
294
00:15:48,281 --> 00:15:50,533
-Have another?
-Don't gotta ask me twice.
295
00:15:54,287 --> 00:15:55,330
Huh?
296
00:15:55,663 --> 00:15:56,790
-It's okay.
-(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)
297
00:15:57,415 --> 00:15:58,458
Hmm?
298
00:16:01,002 --> 00:16:02,754
Mmm...
299
00:16:04,297 --> 00:16:06,383
Hey, don't let the mushy music fool you.
300
00:16:06,466 --> 00:16:08,051
We're not friends or anything.
301
00:16:08,134 --> 00:16:09,969
I'm only doing this for the free food.
302
00:16:11,805 --> 00:16:14,557
-I'm gonna call you Woody.
-Huh?
303
00:16:14,641 --> 00:16:16,559
You like that name? Woody?
304
00:16:16,643 --> 00:16:19,437
I'm gonna call you
Kid Who Just Ran Out Of Bonkers.
305
00:16:19,521 --> 00:16:20,522
See you!
306
00:16:21,481 --> 00:16:22,649
(CHUCKLES)
307
00:16:24,693 --> 00:16:27,237
Well, I hope everyone is hungry.
308
00:16:27,696 --> 00:16:31,449
I wanted our first night in the wilderness
to be a little less wild.
309
00:16:31,991 --> 00:16:34,577
-Got any pizza?
-No, I don't have any pizza.
310
00:16:35,036 --> 00:16:36,579
This is much better than pizza!
311
00:16:36,663 --> 00:16:38,581
Nothing is better than pizza.
312
00:16:38,665 --> 00:16:39,958
Well, I think it looks
313
00:16:40,041 --> 00:16:41,543
absolutely delicious, Lance.
314
00:16:41,626 --> 00:16:42,877
Thank you, baby.
315
00:16:42,961 --> 00:16:45,755
Here's to me building,
and you designing something amazing.
316
00:16:45,839 --> 00:16:47,340
-Amazing.
-Cheers.
317
00:16:47,799 --> 00:16:49,926
Here, cheers. (STAMMERS)
318
00:16:50,260 --> 00:16:51,594
Oh, come on, clink it.
319
00:16:53,430 --> 00:16:54,723
-Hiya, campers!
-(SCREAMS)
320
00:16:54,806 --> 00:16:57,600
Sorry I'm late. Traffic.
So, what's for dinner?
321
00:16:57,684 --> 00:16:59,394
Mmm, good to see you again,
Kid Who Gives Me Food.
322
00:16:59,477 --> 00:17:00,603
What is that thing?
323
00:17:00,687 --> 00:17:02,605
It's okay. I met him in the forest.
324
00:17:02,689 --> 00:17:03,773
He's friendly.
325
00:17:03,857 --> 00:17:05,066
I named him Woody.
326
00:17:05,400 --> 00:17:06,526
(WOODY PANTS)
327
00:17:06,609 --> 00:17:07,652
(BARKS)
328
00:17:07,736 --> 00:17:08,987
What are you doing? Don't feed it.
329
00:17:09,070 --> 00:17:10,739
-We'll never get rid of it.
-(PANTING)
330
00:17:10,822 --> 00:17:13,783
Stay away from him!
You don't know where it's been!
331
00:17:13,867 --> 00:17:16,953
And I have no idea
where you've been, sweetheart.
332
00:17:17,037 --> 00:17:18,997
He's practically tame.
333
00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:20,832
Yeah. As long as you feed me.
334
00:17:20,915 --> 00:17:23,126
Okay, who cut the cheese?
335
00:17:23,209 --> 00:17:25,086
Whoever did it, did a great job!
336
00:17:26,421 --> 00:17:28,381
(STAMMERS) Please, get rid of it!
337
00:17:28,798 --> 00:17:31,634
Shoo! Shoo! Get outta here!
338
00:17:31,718 --> 00:17:33,803
You know, it's so funny
when they try to fly.
339
00:17:33,887 --> 00:17:35,638
-You don't have wings, you dummy!
-Get outta here!
340
00:17:35,722 --> 00:17:36,848
Mmm, beans.
341
00:17:36,931 --> 00:17:38,308
Get rid of it! Do something!
342
00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:39,684
Okay, okay, okay.
343
00:17:39,768 --> 00:17:41,644
(SINGING) Beans, beans, the musical fruit
344
00:17:41,728 --> 00:17:43,396
The more you eat, the more you...
345
00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:44,773
(FARTING AND LAUGHING RHYTHMICALLY)
346
00:17:44,856 --> 00:17:46,107
(GROANS)
347
00:17:46,900 --> 00:17:48,026
(GAGS) Disgusting!
348
00:17:48,109 --> 00:17:49,861
-I think he's awesome!
-WOODY: Mmm-hmm.
349
00:17:49,944 --> 00:17:51,404
-(GASPS) Whoa!
-Get outta here.
350
00:17:51,488 --> 00:17:53,865
You know, I'm sensing
a little hostility here.
351
00:17:53,948 --> 00:17:55,867
Hey, stop. He's not hurting anyone.
352
00:17:55,950 --> 00:17:56,993
You got something in your hair.
353
00:17:57,077 --> 00:17:58,620
Ow. Ow!
354
00:17:59,120 --> 00:18:00,622
-Missed me! Whoa!
-(GROANS)
355
00:18:00,705 --> 00:18:02,999
-Is it something I said?
-(GRUNTING)
356
00:18:03,083 --> 00:18:06,419
(EXCLAIMING) Yoo-hoo!
Over here, you big featherless freak!
357
00:18:06,503 --> 00:18:08,505
-(GROANS)
-Oh... Oh! Oh, baby!
358
00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:09,673
WOODY: (LAUGHING) See you at breakfast.
359
00:18:09,756 --> 00:18:12,092
LANCE: Oh, no.
VANESSA: You hit me!
360
00:18:12,175 --> 00:18:14,260
Baby, I'm so sorry.
Look, it was an accident.
361
00:18:14,344 --> 00:18:16,304
Aw, let me see, let me see, let me see.
362
00:18:16,388 --> 00:18:19,057
Oh, I'm so sorry. Are you okay? You okay?
363
00:18:19,140 --> 00:18:21,267
Look, let's just eat our...
364
00:18:21,351 --> 00:18:22,394
Dinner.
365
00:18:23,436 --> 00:18:24,771
-Ow!
-(GRUNTS)
366
00:18:25,105 --> 00:18:26,731
(WOODY LAUGHING)
367
00:18:34,698 --> 00:18:36,074
(RHYTHMIC PECKING)
368
00:18:44,416 --> 00:18:46,292
(SIGHS)
369
00:18:51,464 --> 00:18:53,133
(PECKING CONTINUES)
370
00:19:01,683 --> 00:19:02,809
Can you not hear that?
371
00:19:05,812 --> 00:19:07,731
That woman could sleep
through a hurricane.
372
00:19:08,314 --> 00:19:10,400
Can you believe that stupid bird?
373
00:19:11,484 --> 00:19:12,652
Tommy?
374
00:19:17,240 --> 00:19:19,576
(WOODY SCATTING AND PECKING)
375
00:19:23,246 --> 00:19:24,247
Hey!
376
00:19:25,081 --> 00:19:26,166
Shoo!
377
00:19:26,958 --> 00:19:29,669
Get outta here! Come on, beat it!
378
00:19:30,420 --> 00:19:31,838
Go find somewhere else to peck.
379
00:19:31,921 --> 00:19:33,381
Go find somewhere else to sleep.
380
00:19:33,465 --> 00:19:36,134
Around here, I'm at the top
of the pecking order.
381
00:19:36,217 --> 00:19:38,553
I said beat it!
382
00:19:38,636 --> 00:19:41,181
He makes the catch,
and the crowd goes wild!
383
00:19:41,264 --> 00:19:42,515
Woo-hoo-hoo!
384
00:19:42,599 --> 00:19:44,642
Give me that back right now!
385
00:19:47,270 --> 00:19:49,356
(RHYTHMIC PECKING)
386
00:19:49,898 --> 00:19:51,191
(EXHALES)
387
00:19:57,822 --> 00:20:00,158
Big day, Mr. Walters.
Ready to break ground?
388
00:20:00,241 --> 00:20:01,242
I sure am, George.
389
00:20:01,326 --> 00:20:03,036
Remember, I want this house
on the market by fall.
390
00:20:03,119 --> 00:20:04,371
So it needs to be done quickly.
391
00:20:04,454 --> 00:20:06,664
Well, for enough money,
anything can be done quickly.
392
00:20:06,748 --> 00:20:07,999
Even out here in the sticks.
393
00:20:08,083 --> 00:20:09,292
Well, that is good to hear.
394
00:20:09,376 --> 00:20:10,377
'Cause according to my schedule,
395
00:20:10,460 --> 00:20:11,628
you're already 20 minutes behind.
396
00:20:11,711 --> 00:20:13,922
-Your schedule?
-Oh, I am hands-on, George.
397
00:20:14,005 --> 00:20:15,382
I'm gonna ride your crew.
398
00:20:15,465 --> 00:20:17,592
Super! They'll love that.
399
00:20:17,676 --> 00:20:20,178
And by the study fireplace,
400
00:20:20,261 --> 00:20:23,223
I was thinking twin
zebra sheepskin chairs.
401
00:20:23,306 --> 00:20:27,352
They'll be a nice contrast
to the Crested Butte cigar leather sofas.
402
00:20:27,435 --> 00:20:29,062
And, of course,
403
00:20:29,145 --> 00:20:33,692
the 30-light, elk antler chandelier
will tie it all together.
404
00:20:33,775 --> 00:20:37,570
And I want it all done in eight weeks.
405
00:20:37,654 --> 00:20:39,072
That's really not enough time.
406
00:20:39,155 --> 00:20:40,699
Money is no object.
407
00:20:41,616 --> 00:20:44,160
-Consider it done.
-Thank you!
408
00:20:44,244 --> 00:20:45,578
Lance, honey,
409
00:20:45,662 --> 00:20:49,416
I've decided on volcanic stone
for the kitchen counters. Mmm?
410
00:20:49,499 --> 00:20:50,875
Great.
411
00:20:50,959 --> 00:20:53,712
Baby, aren't those
the most expensive counters in the world?
412
00:20:53,795 --> 00:20:56,923
Well, duh! The best usually is.
413
00:20:57,340 --> 00:20:59,300
(CHUCKLES) Let me see.
414
00:20:59,384 --> 00:21:01,511
-Okay, honey.
-VANESSA: That's so exciting!
415
00:21:01,594 --> 00:21:04,764
Hey, Tommy, you wanna watch
the excavation?
416
00:21:05,348 --> 00:21:08,018
Hmm, let me think about it. No.
417
00:21:09,310 --> 00:21:12,897
Okay, uh, I'll take that no as a no.
418
00:21:14,899 --> 00:21:16,026
(SIGHS)
419
00:21:22,032 --> 00:21:23,074
(GROANS)
420
00:21:23,158 --> 00:21:25,493
Can't a bird catch some Z's around here?
421
00:21:25,660 --> 00:21:28,371
Huh? Hey, what's the big idea?
422
00:21:31,416 --> 00:21:32,709
MAN: Watch it! Watch it!
423
00:21:36,921 --> 00:21:38,173
Wait a minute.
424
00:21:38,256 --> 00:21:41,217
They're not camping, they're moving in!
425
00:21:41,301 --> 00:21:46,306
No, no, no. This is my forest!
Time for an eviction notice.
426
00:21:47,265 --> 00:21:49,392
Hey! Yeah, you!
427
00:21:49,768 --> 00:21:51,144
Get off my lawn.
428
00:21:51,853 --> 00:21:52,937
-Punk.
-(GASPS)
429
00:21:53,730 --> 00:21:54,981
(YELPS AND GRUNTS)
430
00:21:55,940 --> 00:21:57,609
(MAN YELLS)
431
00:21:57,692 --> 00:21:58,693
(BOTH EXCLAIM)
432
00:21:58,777 --> 00:22:00,320
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?"
433
00:22:00,403 --> 00:22:02,280
"P." "P who?"
434
00:22:02,364 --> 00:22:03,573
"Pee-yew!"
435
00:22:05,116 --> 00:22:06,534
Somebody get that bird!
436
00:22:06,618 --> 00:22:08,370
WOODY: Let's see who's next, shall we?
437
00:22:08,453 --> 00:22:10,205
Eenie, meenie, minie, moe!
438
00:22:10,288 --> 00:22:11,331
Baby!
439
00:22:13,416 --> 00:22:14,876
-Baby!
-WOODY: Bombs away!
440
00:22:14,959 --> 00:22:16,211
The bird! (GASPS)
441
00:22:16,795 --> 00:22:18,588
WOODY: How's that for an eviction notice?
442
00:22:18,672 --> 00:22:19,673
(RETCHES) No. No!
443
00:22:19,756 --> 00:22:21,549
The good thing about a high-fiber diet,
444
00:22:21,633 --> 00:22:23,593
(CHUCKLES) it keeps you regular.
445
00:22:26,471 --> 00:22:27,764
-(GRUNTS)
-Whoa!
446
00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:30,141
That'll buff right out!
447
00:22:30,517 --> 00:22:33,019
-(WHIMPERING)
-Oh, baby.
448
00:22:33,103 --> 00:22:34,729
Don't you "baby" me!
449
00:22:36,439 --> 00:22:39,192
(VANESSA MUTTERS ANGRILY IN PORTUGUESE)
450
00:22:39,275 --> 00:22:41,069
Well, the bad news is
451
00:22:41,152 --> 00:22:44,781
you're encroaching on the habitat
of a very territorial bird.
452
00:22:46,157 --> 00:22:47,450
No kidding.
453
00:22:48,785 --> 00:22:50,495
Well, don't worry about the window.
454
00:22:51,579 --> 00:22:53,707
We'll just add that to the bill.
455
00:22:56,459 --> 00:22:57,919
(PECKING)
456
00:23:06,636 --> 00:23:09,139
Would you keep it down out here?
457
00:23:11,099 --> 00:23:12,434
-Well, see?
-Shh.
458
00:23:12,517 --> 00:23:13,601
-That's much better.
-(SNICKERS)
459
00:23:18,189 --> 00:23:21,276
(BREATHES DEEPLY)
460
00:23:35,832 --> 00:23:37,125
Tommy, open the door!
461
00:23:38,168 --> 00:23:39,169
Tommy!
462
00:23:39,753 --> 00:23:41,463
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
463
00:23:53,850 --> 00:23:55,894
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
464
00:24:06,446 --> 00:24:07,989
(GUITAR TUNING)
465
00:24:13,787 --> 00:24:16,623
You planning on buying it,
or just tuning it to death?
466
00:24:16,706 --> 00:24:19,542
Uh... Sorry, I was just browsing.
467
00:24:19,626 --> 00:24:21,461
Don't sweat it. Play away!
468
00:24:23,922 --> 00:24:25,548
-I'm Jill.
-Uh, I'm Tommy.
469
00:24:25,632 --> 00:24:27,217
-Are you visiting?
-Yeah.
470
00:24:27,300 --> 00:24:29,761
My dad's building this house by the river.
471
00:24:29,844 --> 00:24:33,264
Oh, man. That mega mansion
everyone's talking about?
472
00:24:33,348 --> 00:24:35,266
Yeah, that would be it.
473
00:24:36,101 --> 00:24:37,602
So, you interested in it?
474
00:24:38,311 --> 00:24:40,855
Uh, this is a really...
This is a really sweet guitar.
475
00:24:40,939 --> 00:24:42,691
I helped restore it.
476
00:24:42,774 --> 00:24:45,610
The guy who sold it to us
was a roadie for Springsteen.
477
00:24:45,694 --> 00:24:48,905
Who knows,
Springsteen himself may have played it.
478
00:24:48,988 --> 00:24:50,657
Or at least breathed near it.
479
00:24:51,658 --> 00:24:53,410
(PLAYS GUITAR)
480
00:24:58,164 --> 00:25:00,333
You're not bad. Not bad at all.
481
00:25:00,417 --> 00:25:03,420
Thanks. I've been taking lessons
for a couple years.
482
00:25:03,503 --> 00:25:06,214
Uh, but I left my guitar at home, so...
483
00:25:06,297 --> 00:25:10,135
I can make you a really sweet deal
on that guitar if you like.
484
00:25:10,969 --> 00:25:13,346
My dad is the one with the coin.
485
00:25:13,430 --> 00:25:15,807
I'm pretty much broke.
486
00:25:15,890 --> 00:25:18,101
Maybe we can work something out.
487
00:25:18,184 --> 00:25:19,936
My friend Lyle and I have a band.
488
00:25:20,020 --> 00:25:23,273
He plays the drums, I play bass, but...
489
00:25:23,356 --> 00:25:24,941
You need a guitarist.
490
00:25:25,025 --> 00:25:26,067
Yeah.
491
00:25:26,860 --> 00:25:30,321
The town's annual Firefly Festival
is at the end of the month.
492
00:25:30,405 --> 00:25:32,532
We really wanna play there.
493
00:25:33,033 --> 00:25:34,451
If you help us out,
494
00:25:34,534 --> 00:25:38,204
I'll lend you that guitar for free
for the whole summer.
495
00:25:38,288 --> 00:25:39,706
You interested?
496
00:25:39,789 --> 00:25:42,042
Uh... Yeah, totally!
497
00:25:50,925 --> 00:25:51,926
Hey!
498
00:25:52,469 --> 00:25:55,930
This is our road, and we didn't
give you permission to use it.
499
00:25:56,598 --> 00:26:00,685
Um, actually, this is a public road
built with government funds
500
00:26:00,769 --> 00:26:01,895
and it belongs to everyone.
501
00:26:01,978 --> 00:26:03,605
So technically you are correct.
502
00:26:03,688 --> 00:26:05,148
It is yours, but it's also mine.
503
00:26:05,231 --> 00:26:06,858
Hey, you don't get off that easy.
504
00:26:06,941 --> 00:26:09,402
Look, I don't know what I did
to offend you guys,
505
00:26:09,486 --> 00:26:10,904
but whatever it is, I'll stop.
506
00:26:10,987 --> 00:26:13,365
'Course you will.
You'll be too busy crying.
507
00:26:13,573 --> 00:26:17,118
Seriously! Doesn't your school
have an anti-bullying policy?
508
00:26:17,202 --> 00:26:19,204
Sure does. That's exactly
why we got kicked out.
509
00:26:19,287 --> 00:26:20,497
Right, John? High five!
510
00:26:21,664 --> 00:26:23,958
-Ooh! Look, a guitar!
-Hey, give that back! (GROANS)
511
00:26:25,126 --> 00:26:26,294
(JOHN EXCLAIMS)
512
00:26:26,753 --> 00:26:27,921
What was that?
513
00:26:28,004 --> 00:26:30,048
Whatever it was, it clawed me!
514
00:26:30,131 --> 00:26:31,299
(WOODY HUMMING FANFARE)
515
00:26:31,383 --> 00:26:32,384
Woody!
516
00:26:32,467 --> 00:26:35,303
Now as for you two, where were we?
517
00:26:35,387 --> 00:26:36,596
(BOTH EXCLAIM)
518
00:26:39,974 --> 00:26:40,975
(CHUCKLES)
519
00:26:41,059 --> 00:26:43,144
Get ready to go commando!
520
00:26:43,269 --> 00:26:44,896
This bird's psycho!
521
00:26:44,979 --> 00:26:46,022
(YELLS)
522
00:26:46,523 --> 00:26:47,607
(JOHN WHIMPERS)
523
00:26:47,941 --> 00:26:49,901
Woody, that was awesome!
524
00:26:50,235 --> 00:26:52,028
You went all MMA on 'em!
525
00:26:52,112 --> 00:26:54,322
Nobody messes with my BFF!
526
00:26:54,406 --> 00:26:57,033
And by that, I mean,
Bringer of Free Food. See you!
527
00:26:57,117 --> 00:26:59,703
Oh, come on, George.
You gotta be kidding me.
528
00:27:00,328 --> 00:27:01,830
And why am I paying for that?
529
00:27:03,289 --> 00:27:05,041
It is not my bird.
530
00:27:05,542 --> 00:27:07,460
Fine! Fine. Just...
531
00:27:07,544 --> 00:27:10,296
Every day out here is costing me money.
532
00:27:10,839 --> 00:27:13,216
Yeah, great. Thank you.
533
00:27:14,259 --> 00:27:15,593
Hey, buddy, where you been?
534
00:27:15,677 --> 00:27:16,720
Town.
535
00:27:16,803 --> 00:27:17,929
Where'd that come from?
536
00:27:18,013 --> 00:27:20,432
I'm starting a band with a girl I met.
537
00:27:20,515 --> 00:27:23,935
Oh, and fun fact, I almost got
my butt kicked on the way home.
538
00:27:24,019 --> 00:27:25,603
What are you talking about? By who?
539
00:27:26,604 --> 00:27:29,274
A couple of Neanderthal kids.
540
00:27:29,357 --> 00:27:31,234
It's okay, because Woody saved me.
541
00:27:31,860 --> 00:27:33,486
-Who's Woody?
-The woodpecker.
542
00:27:33,611 --> 00:27:38,033
(SHUSHING) Do not mention
that stupid bird.
543
00:27:38,116 --> 00:27:39,451
-Stupid?
-Yeah.
544
00:27:39,534 --> 00:27:41,619
Last I remember, that stupid bird
545
00:27:41,703 --> 00:27:43,955
-wasn't the one covered in bird poop.
-(GASPS)
546
00:27:44,039 --> 00:27:45,123
LANCE: You know what?
That's enough outta you.
547
00:27:45,206 --> 00:27:47,167
You're in a time-out. Go to your room.
548
00:27:47,292 --> 00:27:49,252
I don't have a room.
549
00:27:49,544 --> 00:27:51,004
Then go into the RV.
550
00:27:51,087 --> 00:27:52,088
Fine!
551
00:27:53,173 --> 00:27:55,550
Oh. And in case you were wondering,
552
00:27:55,633 --> 00:27:59,137
nobody in town is happy
about us building a house up here.
553
00:28:02,349 --> 00:28:03,808
-Can you believe that?
-I know!
554
00:28:03,892 --> 00:28:05,060
What is wrong with these people?
555
00:28:05,143 --> 00:28:06,603
Don't they understand
how great this is gonna be
556
00:28:06,686 --> 00:28:07,937
for their property values?
557
00:28:08,021 --> 00:28:09,564
No, Lance.
558
00:28:09,647 --> 00:28:12,984
I'm talking about
how disrespectful your son is to me.
559
00:28:13,068 --> 00:28:14,110
Oh.
560
00:28:14,486 --> 00:28:15,820
Yeah. That.
561
00:28:15,904 --> 00:28:18,490
This isn't what I signed up for, okay?
562
00:28:18,573 --> 00:28:21,993
Being stepmom
to a bratty kid who hates me!
563
00:28:22,077 --> 00:28:24,245
-Baby, he doesn't hate you.
-He hates me.
564
00:28:24,412 --> 00:28:25,789
If anything, he's just mad at me.
565
00:28:27,874 --> 00:28:29,459
He's just acting out.
566
00:28:29,542 --> 00:28:32,712
I know this is difficult,
but you just gotta be patient.
567
00:28:33,588 --> 00:28:36,257
You'll see, we're gonna get
our old life back in no time.
568
00:28:36,341 --> 00:28:37,592
I promise.
569
00:28:38,301 --> 00:28:39,344
Mmm.
570
00:28:44,683 --> 00:28:46,643
WOODY: Wakey wakey.
571
00:28:47,310 --> 00:28:48,353
Here's Woody!
572
00:28:49,354 --> 00:28:50,939
Ow. Ow. Ow.
573
00:28:51,398 --> 00:28:52,440
(WOODY LAUGHS)
574
00:28:55,068 --> 00:28:56,403
That is it.
575
00:28:57,404 --> 00:28:59,322
I'm finished with you!
576
00:29:00,031 --> 00:29:02,575
Now maybe you didn't get the memo,
577
00:29:02,659 --> 00:29:08,206
but man, not wildlife,
is top of the food chain!
578
00:29:08,289 --> 00:29:10,041
So if I were you,
579
00:29:10,125 --> 00:29:14,295
I would get outta here
before you land on my rotisserie!
580
00:29:14,629 --> 00:29:17,382
Nice rant. Easy to dance to.
I give it a seven.
581
00:29:17,465 --> 00:29:18,466
Hey.
582
00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:19,884
(LAUGHS)
583
00:29:20,301 --> 00:29:22,012
Yeah, you better fly outta here!
584
00:29:22,095 --> 00:29:23,138
WOODY: Yeah, right!
585
00:29:24,639 --> 00:29:27,225
Really? A pinecone?
586
00:29:27,308 --> 00:29:28,643
How pathetic...
587
00:29:30,770 --> 00:29:32,731
(WOODY LAUGHING MOCKINGLY)
588
00:29:40,030 --> 00:29:42,157
You sure this foundation's
deep enough, George?
589
00:29:42,240 --> 00:29:44,159
I want this place to last
longer than these trees.
590
00:29:44,242 --> 00:29:45,577
Twice as long, sir.
591
00:29:45,660 --> 00:29:47,579
Trust me, been doing this a long time.
592
00:29:47,662 --> 00:29:50,749
All right. Babe, isn't this great?
593
00:29:50,832 --> 00:29:54,002
I'm not really a cement person.
594
00:29:54,085 --> 00:29:55,337
Can I have the keys for the car?
595
00:29:55,420 --> 00:29:56,421
I need to go into town
596
00:29:56,504 --> 00:29:58,757
and find a place
to get my highlights touched up.
597
00:29:58,840 --> 00:30:01,134
Sweetheart, why does that matter?
598
00:30:01,217 --> 00:30:03,261
We're out here in the middle of nature.
599
00:30:03,345 --> 00:30:05,722
Yeah, and I wanna look natural.
600
00:30:05,805 --> 00:30:06,848
(GRUNTS SOFTLY)
601
00:30:07,515 --> 00:30:09,351
-Keys are in the RV.
-Okay.
602
00:30:14,606 --> 00:30:16,941
Time to get these trespassers outta here.
603
00:30:17,025 --> 00:30:20,487
We can do this the easy way,
or the Woody way.
604
00:30:20,570 --> 00:30:22,238
I'm thinking the Woody way.
605
00:30:22,322 --> 00:30:23,406
(LAUGHING)
606
00:30:24,449 --> 00:30:25,533
LANCE: Come on, Tommy.
607
00:30:25,617 --> 00:30:28,119
You cannot sit in here all day
staring at a screen.
608
00:30:28,203 --> 00:30:29,621
There's nothing to do here.
609
00:30:29,704 --> 00:30:30,789
Nothing to do here?
610
00:30:32,040 --> 00:30:34,167
They're getting ready
to pour the cement. That's cool.
611
00:30:34,250 --> 00:30:36,044
You should go outside
and watch them do that.
612
00:30:37,003 --> 00:30:38,004
Pass.
613
00:30:38,088 --> 00:30:41,549
Go outside and find something to do.
614
00:30:41,633 --> 00:30:43,134
-Anything.
-Give that back!
615
00:30:43,218 --> 00:30:45,762
VANESSA: Lance? Hurry! That thing is back!
616
00:30:47,722 --> 00:30:48,807
Oh, my God.
617
00:30:49,057 --> 00:30:50,850
No, no, no, no, no, no!
618
00:30:50,934 --> 00:30:53,061
Jackie Chan taught me this one.
619
00:30:53,436 --> 00:30:54,896
(WOODY EXCLAIMING)
620
00:30:55,105 --> 00:30:56,940
How about some of this?
How about some of that?
621
00:30:57,399 --> 00:30:58,817
Bath time!
622
00:30:59,901 --> 00:31:01,111
Hope you're getting hazard pay.
623
00:31:01,361 --> 00:31:02,696
-(GRUNTING)
-(WOODY YELLING)
624
00:31:04,823 --> 00:31:06,491
-No, don't! No!
-Karate chop!
625
00:31:07,367 --> 00:31:09,035
I do all my own stunts.
626
00:31:09,202 --> 00:31:10,829
Here comes the thunder!
627
00:31:10,912 --> 00:31:12,247
(WOODY YELLING)
628
00:31:14,708 --> 00:31:17,544
Don't worry.
I didn't forget about you two.
629
00:31:17,627 --> 00:31:19,129
You're my favorites.
630
00:31:19,212 --> 00:31:21,172
Let's get to the SUV!
631
00:31:21,256 --> 00:31:22,841
(VANESSA WHIMPERS)
632
00:31:23,258 --> 00:31:25,135
Mmm, I wonder how this thing works.
633
00:31:25,885 --> 00:31:28,263
Only one way to find out.
634
00:31:28,346 --> 00:31:29,347
Oh...
635
00:31:32,267 --> 00:31:35,270
Come on! You know
you want me to push it! Oops!
636
00:31:36,604 --> 00:31:38,106
VANESSA: Lance! Lance...
637
00:31:38,440 --> 00:31:40,400
(VANESSA SCREAMING)
638
00:31:40,859 --> 00:31:42,152
(LANCE GROANING)
639
00:31:42,277 --> 00:31:44,487
(VANESSA YELLS INDISTINCTLY)
640
00:31:46,865 --> 00:31:48,324
-(VANESSA SCREAMS)
-(LANCE YELLS)
641
00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:50,326
(LANCE GROANS)
642
00:31:51,911 --> 00:31:53,288
You were right, Lance.
643
00:31:54,497 --> 00:31:56,332
Watching them pour cement is fun.
644
00:31:57,667 --> 00:32:00,211
Now that's how you do things
the Woody way.
645
00:32:00,295 --> 00:32:01,421
(LAUGHS AND SNORTS)
646
00:32:16,061 --> 00:32:17,395
LANCE: I'd like to file a complaint.
647
00:32:18,271 --> 00:32:19,272
No.
648
00:32:19,898 --> 00:32:21,107
No. No.
649
00:32:21,191 --> 00:32:22,442
Yep, that's it.
650
00:32:22,942 --> 00:32:24,736
That's the flying demon right there.
651
00:32:24,819 --> 00:32:26,488
The pileated red-crowned woodpecker?
652
00:32:26,571 --> 00:32:28,239
-Yep.
-Impossible.
653
00:32:28,323 --> 00:32:30,033
The red-crowned woodpecker
has been extinct
654
00:32:30,116 --> 00:32:31,284
for almost 100 years.
655
00:32:31,493 --> 00:32:33,578
I'm telling you, that's the bird.
656
00:32:33,745 --> 00:32:36,081
Uh-huh. Sure it is.
657
00:32:36,164 --> 00:32:38,625
Any chance you're taking
any sort of medication?
658
00:32:38,708 --> 00:32:41,336
Look, I don't care
what kind of bird it is.
659
00:32:41,419 --> 00:32:43,588
I want it off my property for good.
660
00:32:43,672 --> 00:32:44,839
Now how does that happen?
661
00:32:45,173 --> 00:32:47,759
Well, the local Native Americans believed
662
00:32:47,842 --> 00:32:49,928
it was the incarnation of Marconda,
663
00:32:50,011 --> 00:32:51,763
God of Chaos and Mayhem,
664
00:32:51,846 --> 00:32:54,057
mischievous trickster
who haunted the forest.
665
00:32:54,432 --> 00:32:56,768
Super factoid. What did they do about it?
666
00:32:56,851 --> 00:32:57,936
Moved away.
667
00:32:58,645 --> 00:33:00,188
-Moved away?
-More like fled.
668
00:33:00,772 --> 00:33:03,108
Didn't even pack,
left all their things behind.
669
00:33:03,191 --> 00:33:05,819
Well, I'm not gonna flee.
Can we just kill it?
670
00:33:05,902 --> 00:33:07,445
No, you can't just kill it.
671
00:33:07,529 --> 00:33:11,157
The woodpecker is a protected species.
You'd be breaking the law.
672
00:33:11,241 --> 00:33:13,034
A $10,000 fine.
673
00:33:14,285 --> 00:33:15,745
Do you take credit cards?
674
00:33:16,413 --> 00:33:18,289
And two years in jail.
675
00:33:19,749 --> 00:33:20,959
All right.
676
00:33:21,042 --> 00:33:22,585
Well, there's Plan A.
677
00:33:23,211 --> 00:33:24,504
Do you have any ideas?
678
00:33:24,587 --> 00:33:26,715
Learn to live with it.
679
00:33:26,798 --> 00:33:29,259
There is plenty of room for both of you.
680
00:33:30,969 --> 00:33:32,470
Thanks.
681
00:33:32,554 --> 00:33:34,472
You've been tremendously unhelpful.
682
00:33:38,727 --> 00:33:40,687
NATE: How hard can it be
683
00:33:40,770 --> 00:33:44,065
to find a red-headed woodpecker
with hands?
684
00:33:44,149 --> 00:33:46,735
Well, I feel like I know
the answer to this one.
685
00:33:47,819 --> 00:33:49,237
Hey, give me a hint.
686
00:33:53,491 --> 00:33:56,119
Oh... Oh, no, no, no.
687
00:33:56,453 --> 00:33:58,747
Oh, no, no, no.
688
00:34:00,415 --> 00:34:01,499
That's it!
689
00:34:02,334 --> 00:34:06,463
Nobody poops on my truck
and gets away with it!
690
00:34:07,213 --> 00:34:08,715
One time.
691
00:34:08,798 --> 00:34:12,302
That happened one time
and you never let me forget it.
692
00:34:13,970 --> 00:34:15,597
(WOODY LAUGHING)
693
00:34:18,850 --> 00:34:20,894
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING IN STORE)
694
00:34:25,648 --> 00:34:28,443
Hey, I know that song. That's my ringtone!
695
00:34:33,156 --> 00:34:35,492
Well, what do you know? Peanut Butter Boy!
696
00:34:39,579 --> 00:34:40,705
That was awesome!
697
00:34:40,789 --> 00:34:42,332
Heck yeah! We killed it!
698
00:34:42,415 --> 00:34:44,501
-Hey, kid!
-Hey, Woody!
699
00:34:45,043 --> 00:34:47,879
I was just flapping by and heard someone
laying down a fresh beat.
700
00:34:47,962 --> 00:34:49,005
Whoa!
701
00:34:49,172 --> 00:34:50,799
What kind of bird is that?
702
00:34:50,882 --> 00:34:53,677
Some kind of woodpecker.
He lives up by my place.
703
00:34:53,760 --> 00:34:57,764
Before I met you guys, he was
pretty much my only friend out here.
704
00:34:58,848 --> 00:35:00,934
Friend? Hmm...
705
00:35:01,267 --> 00:35:03,061
Nope, never had one of those before.
706
00:35:03,186 --> 00:35:04,479
The festival's at the end of the month.
707
00:35:04,562 --> 00:35:06,481
We still got a lot of practicing to do.
708
00:35:06,564 --> 00:35:09,359
One, two. One, two, three, four.
709
00:35:11,194 --> 00:35:13,530
(SINGING) Everybody's heard about the bird
710
00:35:14,197 --> 00:35:16,116
Yeah, this here is my jam!
711
00:35:16,199 --> 00:35:19,202
Bird is the word
Bird, bird, bird
712
00:35:19,285 --> 00:35:21,454
Oh, yeah! That's right. I peck by ear.
713
00:35:21,538 --> 00:35:23,456
Never had a lesson.
714
00:35:23,540 --> 00:35:26,876
Whoa! That bird's got mad skills!
715
00:35:27,293 --> 00:35:29,212
Don't you know about the bird?
716
00:35:29,295 --> 00:35:31,923
Well, everybody knows that
The bird is the word
717
00:35:32,007 --> 00:35:34,509
Bird, bird, bird
718
00:35:35,051 --> 00:35:37,053
-(INDISTINCT CONVERSATION)
-(LAUGHING)
719
00:35:39,014 --> 00:35:40,890
(GASPS AND EXCLAIMS)
720
00:35:42,559 --> 00:35:43,643
Oh...
721
00:35:49,399 --> 00:35:50,900
(MEN YELLING)
722
00:35:53,695 --> 00:35:54,738
(GASPS)
723
00:35:55,196 --> 00:35:57,365
Bird, bird, bird
724
00:35:59,200 --> 00:36:00,535
LANCE: Another bill!
725
00:36:00,618 --> 00:36:02,078
Where did this come from?
726
00:36:06,958 --> 00:36:08,626
Oh, jeez! Bees!
727
00:36:10,170 --> 00:36:11,254
Run!
728
00:36:11,379 --> 00:36:13,131
-(SHRIEKS)
-To the river!
729
00:36:15,091 --> 00:36:16,259
(THUDDING)
730
00:36:16,343 --> 00:36:17,802
(BOTH GROANING)
731
00:36:24,768 --> 00:36:27,395
Hmm. "On"? Okay. I can do that.
732
00:36:27,479 --> 00:36:28,480
(LAUGHS)
733
00:36:28,563 --> 00:36:30,523
(GROANING)
734
00:36:30,607 --> 00:36:31,941
(LAUGHING)
735
00:36:32,025 --> 00:36:33,651
Just like in the cartoons!
736
00:36:47,874 --> 00:36:48,958
I'm back!
737
00:36:49,042 --> 00:36:50,502
(LAUGHING)
738
00:36:51,252 --> 00:36:52,879
No, no, no!
739
00:36:52,962 --> 00:36:54,881
(LAUGHING AND EXCLAIMING)
740
00:36:55,548 --> 00:36:56,800
(GRUNTS)
741
00:36:59,552 --> 00:37:01,346
(VOCALIZING)
742
00:37:01,680 --> 00:37:04,224
Well, don't you know about the bird?
743
00:37:04,307 --> 00:37:06,726
Well, everybody knows that
The bird is the word
744
00:37:06,810 --> 00:37:08,937
Well, the bird, bird
B-bird's the word
745
00:37:09,020 --> 00:37:10,021
Bird!
746
00:37:10,105 --> 00:37:11,856
Oh, yeah! That was awesome!
747
00:37:12,440 --> 00:37:13,775
Woody, that was sick!
748
00:37:13,858 --> 00:37:16,277
Oh, yeah! The bird is the word!
749
00:37:16,361 --> 00:37:17,779
You know this song is about me, right?
750
00:37:18,863 --> 00:37:22,784
Hmm. It's quiet. Too quiet.
751
00:37:22,867 --> 00:37:24,452
I can fix that.
752
00:37:24,536 --> 00:37:25,704
(LAUGHING)
753
00:37:30,166 --> 00:37:32,210
Mmm! (CHUCKLING)
754
00:37:34,045 --> 00:37:36,506
Anyone else smell gas?
755
00:37:36,589 --> 00:37:38,216
And it's not me this time!
756
00:37:42,137 --> 00:37:44,681
Nothing works around here.
757
00:37:46,558 --> 00:37:49,436
Wait for it. Wait for it.
758
00:37:50,311 --> 00:37:51,354
-(SIGHS)
-(METALLIC CLICKING)
759
00:37:51,438 --> 00:37:52,522
(SCATS ALONG TO CLICKING)
760
00:37:54,524 --> 00:37:55,567
Whoa!
761
00:37:56,860 --> 00:37:57,944
Oh, jeez.
762
00:37:58,361 --> 00:38:00,113
Kids, don't try this at home.
763
00:38:00,196 --> 00:38:02,407
I'm a professional cartoon character.
764
00:38:03,116 --> 00:38:04,617
(COUGHING)
765
00:38:04,826 --> 00:38:06,036
(MEN GASP)
766
00:38:08,705 --> 00:38:11,416
Ew! Definitely swipe left.
767
00:38:11,499 --> 00:38:12,584
Oh, boy.
768
00:38:12,667 --> 00:38:14,627
(HIGH-PITCHED SHRIEKING)
769
00:38:21,384 --> 00:38:22,886
Baby, please,
can we talk about this a minute?
770
00:38:22,969 --> 00:38:24,554
-(GROANS)
-You know what? You were right.
771
00:38:24,637 --> 00:38:25,847
I should have
listened to you in the first place.
772
00:38:25,930 --> 00:38:27,807
We'll go to a hotel.
773
00:38:27,891 --> 00:38:29,309
I'm going to a hotel.
774
00:38:29,434 --> 00:38:31,686
The Fairmont Olympic in Seattle.
775
00:38:31,770 --> 00:38:34,522
Five stars. All the amenities.
776
00:38:34,606 --> 00:38:36,149
Suite for one.
777
00:38:36,232 --> 00:38:37,400
(SHATTERING)
778
00:38:38,735 --> 00:38:40,737
I will get rid of that woodpecker,
I promise you.
779
00:38:40,820 --> 00:38:43,114
It's too late, Lance.
780
00:38:43,406 --> 00:38:45,533
You're not the man I thought you were.
781
00:38:45,784 --> 00:38:49,746
I fell in love with a cold,
heartless, courtroom killer.
782
00:38:49,829 --> 00:38:52,791
Not a man who loses to a flying squirrel.
783
00:38:56,753 --> 00:38:59,172
If you ever move back to Seattle,
784
00:39:00,423 --> 00:39:01,675
we can do lunch.
785
00:39:03,593 --> 00:39:04,594
Bye!
786
00:39:08,807 --> 00:39:12,310
I think I just did that guy a huge favor.
787
00:39:12,394 --> 00:39:14,062
You're welcome!
788
00:39:31,329 --> 00:39:32,747
(SIGHS)
789
00:39:40,130 --> 00:39:41,256
Sorry.
790
00:39:43,008 --> 00:39:44,092
What?
791
00:39:45,593 --> 00:39:46,845
About Vanessa.
792
00:39:47,595 --> 00:39:48,847
I know you liked her.
793
00:39:51,182 --> 00:39:52,350
Thanks.
794
00:39:55,812 --> 00:39:57,022
Yeah, I did.
795
00:40:01,317 --> 00:40:04,362
Sometimes things
don't work out the way you planned.
796
00:40:05,822 --> 00:40:07,824
You'll find that out when you're older.
797
00:40:09,159 --> 00:40:10,952
Not sure I wanna find out.
798
00:40:12,328 --> 00:40:14,831
Nah, it's not all that bad.
799
00:40:17,375 --> 00:40:23,673
It's just that in life, your dreams
and reality don't always line up.
800
00:40:25,467 --> 00:40:30,388
So what you're trying to tell me is,
it basically stinks.
801
00:40:30,472 --> 00:40:31,473
(CHUCKLES)
802
00:40:32,223 --> 00:40:34,351
No, not all the time, but...
803
00:40:35,727 --> 00:40:36,936
Yeah.
804
00:40:37,020 --> 00:40:39,481
Sometimes life basically stinks.
805
00:40:44,027 --> 00:40:45,653
Let's get some sleep.
806
00:40:45,737 --> 00:40:47,906
Things always look better in the morning.
807
00:40:49,824 --> 00:40:51,368
At least I hope they do.
808
00:40:54,162 --> 00:40:56,039
LANCE: So I've got
a pretty serious bird problem.
809
00:40:56,122 --> 00:40:57,415
And from what I understand,
810
00:40:57,499 --> 00:41:00,085
you two gentlemen are the finest
pest control company in town.
811
00:41:00,168 --> 00:41:01,211
(SLURPING)
812
00:41:01,294 --> 00:41:03,254
You're the only pest control
company in town.
813
00:41:03,797 --> 00:41:05,340
But I'm sure men of your...
814
00:41:05,423 --> 00:41:06,966
(OTIS BELCHES)
815
00:41:07,634 --> 00:41:10,011
...caliber, won't have
any trouble with this job?
816
00:41:10,095 --> 00:41:11,971
It's just a little woodpecker.
817
00:41:15,266 --> 00:41:16,685
-Mister, do you know how...
-(THUDS)
818
00:41:16,768 --> 00:41:19,437
How can we help you, Mr. Walters?
819
00:41:19,521 --> 00:41:24,859
Well, I need you to trap it
and release it far, far away from here.
820
00:41:24,943 --> 00:41:27,362
I'd say kill it,
but apparently that's illegal.
821
00:41:27,445 --> 00:41:30,699
Of course not.
We would never break the "law."
822
00:41:30,782 --> 00:41:31,825
Nate, what about that time...
823
00:41:32,617 --> 00:41:33,618
How much?
824
00:41:33,868 --> 00:41:38,456
Our standard woodpecker
removal fee is 200...
825
00:41:38,540 --> 00:41:39,874
500 bucks. Cash money.
826
00:41:39,958 --> 00:41:41,543
-Otis, are you...
-Done.
827
00:41:41,918 --> 00:41:44,629
Gonna eat your cherry?
828
00:41:45,296 --> 00:41:46,798
All yours.
829
00:41:46,881 --> 00:41:48,133
Thanks. I'll, uh...
830
00:41:49,300 --> 00:41:51,136
I'll save this for later.
831
00:41:52,721 --> 00:41:53,763
Check, please.
832
00:41:54,139 --> 00:41:56,307
So, I will see you gentlemen
in the morning, yes?
833
00:41:56,391 --> 00:41:57,976
Uh, you got it.
834
00:41:58,059 --> 00:42:00,228
We will hit the hay early.
835
00:42:01,187 --> 00:42:04,315
Be there bright and early,
ready to removify that bird.
836
00:42:05,442 --> 00:42:07,485
Just not before 10:00 a.m., all right?
837
00:42:07,569 --> 00:42:09,904
That's been when my son
usually comes into town,
838
00:42:09,988 --> 00:42:11,823
and I'd rather he not know
anything about this.
839
00:42:11,906 --> 00:42:13,366
10:00 it is.
840
00:42:13,450 --> 00:42:15,994
We will see you in the mañana.
841
00:42:17,245 --> 00:42:18,621
Mañana.
842
00:42:19,330 --> 00:42:21,249
I thought we were seeing him tomorrow?
843
00:42:21,332 --> 00:42:22,500
(STAMMERS)
844
00:42:23,335 --> 00:42:25,253
Holy crow!
845
00:42:25,337 --> 00:42:26,921
We've been searching
for that woodpecker for a month
846
00:42:27,005 --> 00:42:28,590
and now it just falls right in our laps.
847
00:42:28,673 --> 00:42:31,259
Plus, we're gonna make
five hundo, cash money!
848
00:42:31,343 --> 00:42:32,594
Dummy!
849
00:42:32,677 --> 00:42:34,095
It's the pileated red-crowned woodpecker.
850
00:42:34,179 --> 00:42:36,848
We can sell that bird
for 1,000 times more than that.
851
00:42:36,931 --> 00:42:39,434
Can't you just smell the money?
852
00:42:39,809 --> 00:42:40,935
(SNIFFS)
853
00:42:41,019 --> 00:42:42,479
Nah, it's just me.
854
00:42:45,357 --> 00:42:47,067
TOMMY: Hey, what are we
gonna call our band?
855
00:42:47,150 --> 00:42:48,401
JILL: How about Poison Ivy?
856
00:42:48,485 --> 00:42:50,445
'Cause I think I just stepped in some.
857
00:42:50,528 --> 00:42:52,405
LYLE: Hey, look! An eagle feather!
858
00:42:52,489 --> 00:42:53,782
TOMMY: And there's another one!
859
00:42:53,865 --> 00:42:55,408
JILL: That's a lot of feathers.
860
00:42:56,326 --> 00:42:57,744
Let's follow the trail.
861
00:42:57,827 --> 00:42:59,537
LYLE: Uh, I thought
we were going swimming.
862
00:42:59,621 --> 00:43:01,498
JILL: Don't worry, we will.
863
00:43:04,167 --> 00:43:05,960
I wonder where they came from.
864
00:43:07,921 --> 00:43:10,090
Guys, the quarry's back that way.
865
00:43:10,173 --> 00:43:11,424
JILL: Don't be such a wimp.
866
00:43:11,508 --> 00:43:12,550
Whoa.
867
00:43:15,178 --> 00:43:16,930
TOMMY: Hey, let's go check it out.
868
00:43:17,013 --> 00:43:18,723
JILL: Looks totally abandoned.
869
00:43:18,807 --> 00:43:20,725
LYLE: Uh, did you guys not see the sign?
870
00:43:22,894 --> 00:43:24,979
Hey, wait for me!
871
00:43:38,702 --> 00:43:40,704
LYLE: What is this place?
872
00:43:46,418 --> 00:43:48,086
Can we go now?
873
00:43:50,046 --> 00:43:51,548
Look at all this stuff.
874
00:43:54,175 --> 00:43:57,053
JILL: Who would do something
like that to those animals?
875
00:43:57,137 --> 00:43:58,888
LYLE: I told you guys
we shouldn't have come in here.
876
00:43:59,097 --> 00:44:01,099
Let's go. Come on!
877
00:44:01,391 --> 00:44:02,517
(CLATTERING)
878
00:44:02,600 --> 00:44:03,977
(ALL GASP)
879
00:44:04,102 --> 00:44:05,603
What was that?
880
00:44:06,438 --> 00:44:08,064
What... What are you doing?
881
00:44:12,402 --> 00:44:13,695
-(EXHALES)
-(OWL CHIRPS)
882
00:44:15,405 --> 00:44:16,698
Look how sad he looks.
883
00:44:18,450 --> 00:44:21,244
What are you doing here?
884
00:44:21,369 --> 00:44:23,329
We're sorry, sir.
We didn't touch anything.
885
00:44:23,413 --> 00:44:26,082
This is private property.
886
00:44:26,166 --> 00:44:28,251
You are trespassing!
887
00:44:28,335 --> 00:44:30,128
We could press charges.
888
00:44:30,211 --> 00:44:33,256
TOMMY: We were just
on our way to the quarry, and we got lost.
889
00:44:33,340 --> 00:44:34,549
JILL: Yeah!
890
00:44:34,632 --> 00:44:37,302
See the towels? Swimming?
891
00:44:37,886 --> 00:44:40,722
It wasn't my idea. They made me.
892
00:44:41,514 --> 00:44:46,436
If any of you little runts
come back here again,
893
00:44:46,519 --> 00:44:49,606
bad things are gonna happen.
894
00:44:49,689 --> 00:44:51,566
Now, all of you,
895
00:44:52,734 --> 00:44:53,735
get outta here!
896
00:44:53,818 --> 00:44:55,612
-(LYLE WHIMPERS)
-Go! Go! Go!
897
00:44:55,695 --> 00:44:57,155
JILL: Come on, guys!
TOMMY: Let's go!
898
00:44:58,198 --> 00:45:00,742
Not you, dummy.
899
00:45:00,825 --> 00:45:02,035
(STUTTERS)
900
00:45:03,286 --> 00:45:04,412
JILL: Come on! Quick!
901
00:45:04,496 --> 00:45:05,538
LYLE: Guys, come on!
902
00:45:14,047 --> 00:45:15,048
(PECKING)
903
00:45:15,131 --> 00:45:17,384
Peck away all you want tonight, bird.
904
00:45:18,093 --> 00:45:20,595
Tomorrow, the hammer drops.
905
00:45:26,643 --> 00:45:28,103
NATE: Otis, take her up.
906
00:45:28,186 --> 00:45:29,187
LANCE: So, what's the plan?
907
00:45:29,270 --> 00:45:30,855
NATE: Oh, I'll tell you the plan.
908
00:45:30,939 --> 00:45:34,818
We got this carbon fiber
and titanium reinforced cage.
909
00:45:34,901 --> 00:45:38,363
We've got the thermal cameras
all over the perimeter.
910
00:45:38,446 --> 00:45:41,241
And for just a little added insurance,
911
00:45:42,659 --> 00:45:45,745
we've got these electrified net guns.
912
00:45:45,829 --> 00:45:48,957
If for any reason he manages to escape
and make a run for it,
913
00:45:50,583 --> 00:45:53,837
heat-seeking tranquilizer darts.
914
00:45:54,337 --> 00:45:58,717
Oh, and for bait,
we've got two aces in the hole.
915
00:45:58,800 --> 00:46:01,594
At first, a female decoy.
916
00:46:01,678 --> 00:46:02,971
(CHUCKLES)
917
00:46:04,055 --> 00:46:07,517
Second, we've added a jar
of extra-nutty peanut butter.
918
00:46:07,809 --> 00:46:10,145
Because no right-minded woodpecker
919
00:46:10,228 --> 00:46:12,564
can resist the combination of romance
920
00:46:13,732 --> 00:46:15,025
and peanut butter.
921
00:46:15,692 --> 00:46:19,154
It is a bad day to be a woodpecker.
922
00:46:19,237 --> 00:46:21,656
WOODY: (SINGING)
Everybody thinks I'm crazy
923
00:46:21,740 --> 00:46:23,950
Yessiree, that's me, that's me
924
00:46:24,034 --> 00:46:25,994
That's what I'm cracked up to be
925
00:46:26,077 --> 00:46:28,496
I chop a hole in every tree
926
00:46:28,580 --> 00:46:32,292
Knock on wood
Knock on wood!
927
00:46:33,043 --> 00:46:36,296
So I'm crazy
What, what, what can I do?
928
00:46:36,379 --> 00:46:37,964
So are you
929
00:46:38,048 --> 00:46:40,175
(SNIFFS) Do you smell that?
930
00:46:40,258 --> 00:46:42,427
Is that what I think it is?
931
00:46:42,510 --> 00:46:43,511
Peanut butter!
932
00:46:44,512 --> 00:46:46,723
Peanut butter!
Peanut butter! Peanut butter!
933
00:46:46,806 --> 00:46:48,350
Peanut butter! (EXCLAIMS)
934
00:46:49,601 --> 00:46:52,228
Incoming bogey.
300 yards and closing fast.
935
00:46:52,604 --> 00:46:54,022
What do we have here?
936
00:46:55,607 --> 00:46:58,026
Well, hello there. Come here often?
937
00:46:58,109 --> 00:47:01,488
I noticed you have a jar
of extra-nutty peanut butter.
938
00:47:01,571 --> 00:47:03,490
I'm a big fan of the stuff myself.
939
00:47:03,573 --> 00:47:06,284
Mind if I join you?
940
00:47:06,368 --> 00:47:07,369
Is it just me,
941
00:47:07,452 --> 00:47:09,954
or is there something kind of
wooden about this chick?
942
00:47:10,372 --> 00:47:11,373
Come on.
943
00:47:11,456 --> 00:47:14,459
How about we take this back
to my place and watch a movie?
944
00:47:14,542 --> 00:47:16,044
Ever seen The Birds?
945
00:47:16,920 --> 00:47:18,296
(CHUCKLES) It's hilarious.
946
00:47:21,633 --> 00:47:23,885
It feels like something
has come between us.
947
00:47:23,968 --> 00:47:25,053
Heat seekers!
948
00:47:25,136 --> 00:47:27,097
You didn't think I was gonna
get caught this easy, did you?
949
00:47:27,180 --> 00:47:29,974
Peanut butter makes me crazy, not stupid.
950
00:47:30,058 --> 00:47:31,643
-Come on, what else you got?
-NATE: Shoot him!
951
00:47:32,560 --> 00:47:34,229
Yikes! Time to go!
952
00:47:34,938 --> 00:47:35,939
Whoa!
953
00:47:36,773 --> 00:47:38,316
(YELLING)
954
00:47:40,276 --> 00:47:42,195
(DEVICE BEEPING)
955
00:47:46,408 --> 00:47:47,867
(IN SLOW MOTION) Whoa!
956
00:47:50,120 --> 00:47:51,538
(YELPING)
957
00:47:52,163 --> 00:47:53,415
Whoa, there he is!
958
00:47:53,748 --> 00:47:55,000
Tag, you're it!
959
00:47:55,083 --> 00:47:56,626
Whoa! (GRUNTS)
960
00:47:56,710 --> 00:47:58,253
Nighty-night, boys.
961
00:47:58,336 --> 00:48:00,380
Not again.
962
00:48:01,339 --> 00:48:02,799
(BOTH GROAN)
963
00:48:04,843 --> 00:48:07,887
WOODY: Hey, beardo!
Yeah, I'm talking to you.
964
00:48:09,264 --> 00:48:11,141
Feeling lucky today, punk?
965
00:48:11,224 --> 00:48:12,726
Well, do you?
966
00:48:15,729 --> 00:48:17,063
(GRUNTING)
967
00:48:18,273 --> 00:48:20,108
Electrifying!
968
00:48:20,567 --> 00:48:21,568
Smile!
969
00:48:23,528 --> 00:48:24,779
Come to Papa.
970
00:48:24,863 --> 00:48:27,323
Later, babe. Text me
when you make parole. (KISSES)
971
00:48:39,002 --> 00:48:40,378
SAM: Here, I got it.
972
00:48:41,379 --> 00:48:43,715
Why, Ranger Sam. How kind of you.
973
00:48:43,798 --> 00:48:45,216
No worries.
974
00:48:45,300 --> 00:48:47,344
I heard about your RV. Was it bad?
975
00:48:47,427 --> 00:48:50,013
Let's just say I don't think
I'm gonna get my damage deposit back.
976
00:48:50,096 --> 00:48:51,514
How's your fiancée taking it?
977
00:48:51,598 --> 00:48:53,475
You mean, my ex-fiancée?
978
00:48:53,558 --> 00:48:54,559
I'm pretty sure she's taking it
979
00:48:54,642 --> 00:48:55,935
to a five-star hotel in Seattle.
980
00:48:56,436 --> 00:48:58,438
-I'm sorry.
-Yeah, thanks.
981
00:48:59,147 --> 00:49:01,399
Never thought a woodpecker
would break up my relationship.
982
00:49:01,483 --> 00:49:03,485
But I guess out here these things happen.
983
00:49:03,568 --> 00:49:05,820
Can I give you a piece of advice
about that woodpecker?
984
00:49:05,904 --> 00:49:08,406
It is not a woodpecker.
It is a demon from hell.
985
00:49:08,490 --> 00:49:11,326
Okay, then, can I give you a piece
of advice about that demon from hell?
986
00:49:11,409 --> 00:49:13,328
Does it involve
untraceable forms of poison?
987
00:49:13,411 --> 00:49:14,746
No. Just the opposite.
988
00:49:15,080 --> 00:49:18,750
Instead of fighting with the woodpecker,
maybe try being nice to it.
989
00:49:19,459 --> 00:49:21,461
-Be nice to it?
-You've tried everything else.
990
00:49:21,628 --> 00:49:24,798
Besides, you catch a lot more flies
with honey than vinegar.
991
00:49:26,341 --> 00:49:27,759
Think about it.
992
00:49:36,935 --> 00:49:38,103
Hey, bird!
993
00:49:40,522 --> 00:49:41,940
(WHISTLES)
994
00:49:43,817 --> 00:49:45,819
Just your friendly neighbor, Lance.
995
00:49:45,902 --> 00:49:48,279
A little peace offering.
996
00:49:48,363 --> 00:49:50,573
Is that a sock on a stick? Pathetic.
997
00:49:50,657 --> 00:49:51,825
You win!
998
00:49:53,326 --> 00:49:54,494
Hey, do you like cookies?
999
00:49:55,745 --> 00:49:57,163
Everybody likes cookies.
1000
00:49:57,831 --> 00:49:59,958
There'll be plenty more
where those come from.
1001
00:50:00,041 --> 00:50:02,585
-Whole brand new box every day
-(JEERING)
1002
00:50:02,669 --> 00:50:06,339
as long as you let me
build my house in peace.
1003
00:50:06,756 --> 00:50:10,260
And then once I sell my house,
you'll be somebody else's nightmare.
1004
00:50:10,677 --> 00:50:11,678
Listen, buster,
1005
00:50:11,761 --> 00:50:15,098
if you think giving me a little food
is gonna make me forget...
1006
00:50:15,390 --> 00:50:16,516
(EXCLAIMING)
1007
00:50:18,435 --> 00:50:20,729
Wow, these are killer. What was I saying?
1008
00:50:20,812 --> 00:50:22,981
Pretty good, huh? What do you say?
1009
00:50:23,064 --> 00:50:24,524
I'll think it over.
1010
00:50:26,401 --> 00:50:28,361
Well, I'll take that as a yes.
1011
00:50:29,195 --> 00:50:31,990
All right, you measure twice and cut once.
1012
00:50:32,073 --> 00:50:33,533
That's correct.
1013
00:50:34,617 --> 00:50:35,785
Here you go.
1014
00:50:35,869 --> 00:50:36,953
WOODY: Hey, what's up there, hardhead?
1015
00:50:37,037 --> 00:50:38,038
-(MEN YELL)
-Hey, look out! Hey!
1016
00:50:38,121 --> 00:50:41,166
Whoa, whoa! Everybody, relax! Relax.
1017
00:50:41,249 --> 00:50:42,292
(CLEARS THROAT)
1018
00:50:42,375 --> 00:50:43,710
I got this.
1019
00:50:44,586 --> 00:50:46,087
Ah, thank you very much.
1020
00:50:46,713 --> 00:50:48,340
Same time tomorrow.
1021
00:50:48,423 --> 00:50:49,716
Please, allow me.
1022
00:50:52,427 --> 00:50:53,887
That's lunch! Woo-hoo!
1023
00:50:54,471 --> 00:50:55,805
WOODY: (CHOMPING) Mmm.
1024
00:50:57,140 --> 00:50:58,350
(BURPS)
1025
00:51:01,269 --> 00:51:03,897
Okay, okay.
I know what you folks are thinking.
1026
00:51:03,980 --> 00:51:06,608
Woody is a big, fat sellout.
1027
00:51:06,691 --> 00:51:07,942
But the way I see it,
1028
00:51:08,026 --> 00:51:11,112
it's a mutually beneficial
business arrangement. (GULPS)
1029
00:51:11,780 --> 00:51:14,699
Anyway, I let them build
their dream house in peace.
1030
00:51:14,783 --> 00:51:17,202
As long as they paid me.
1031
00:51:17,285 --> 00:51:18,536
Voilà!
1032
00:51:18,620 --> 00:51:22,457
Well, Mr. Walters,
looks like you're gonna get your house.
1033
00:51:22,540 --> 00:51:25,877
Over schedule and over budget,
but we did it.
1034
00:51:29,798 --> 00:51:31,591
All righty.
1035
00:51:32,258 --> 00:51:34,344
-Here you go.
-Thanks, Dad.
1036
00:51:36,388 --> 00:51:37,555
You're welcome.
1037
00:51:37,639 --> 00:51:38,807
Hey, what about me?
1038
00:51:38,890 --> 00:51:40,392
Don't worry, I didn't forget about you.
1039
00:51:40,475 --> 00:51:41,768
I sure hope not.
1040
00:51:42,977 --> 00:51:44,396
Mmm, my favorite!
1041
00:51:44,854 --> 00:51:45,980
-Yummy!
-(CELL PHONE RINGING)
1042
00:51:46,773 --> 00:51:48,274
-(CHUCKLES)
-You must give me the recipe.
1043
00:51:49,984 --> 00:51:52,654
Hey, Linda, what's up? How's your dad?
1044
00:51:52,737 --> 00:51:54,239
Uh, a little better. Thanks.
1045
00:51:54,322 --> 00:51:55,323
You guys deliver?
1046
00:51:55,407 --> 00:51:56,741
Listen, uh, I've got some good news.
1047
00:51:56,825 --> 00:51:57,867
I talked to my cousin
1048
00:51:57,951 --> 00:51:59,786
and she can take Tommy
while I'm at the hospital.
1049
00:51:59,869 --> 00:52:01,162
So you're off the hook.
1050
00:52:01,287 --> 00:52:02,414
Really?
1051
00:52:02,539 --> 00:52:03,665
Well, it's what you wanted, right?
1052
00:52:04,082 --> 00:52:05,166
Yeah.
1053
00:52:06,835 --> 00:52:08,253
You know what? No. (STAMMERS)
1054
00:52:10,296 --> 00:52:11,840
I think we're okay here.
1055
00:52:11,923 --> 00:52:13,216
Seriously?
1056
00:52:13,299 --> 00:52:14,634
Yeah, seriously.
1057
00:52:15,802 --> 00:52:16,803
Keep me posted on your dad, would you?
1058
00:52:16,928 --> 00:52:17,971
Sure.
1059
00:52:18,346 --> 00:52:19,431
Take care of my boy.
1060
00:52:19,556 --> 00:52:20,640
Our boy.
1061
00:52:21,975 --> 00:52:23,309
See you later.
1062
00:52:30,191 --> 00:52:31,401
(SIGHS)
1063
00:52:37,282 --> 00:52:38,950
(WHISPERING) Nate,
how are we ever gonna get that bird?
1064
00:52:39,034 --> 00:52:40,493
It's always with them.
1065
00:52:41,494 --> 00:52:44,706
Just a matter of time, Otis.
Keep your shirt on.
1066
00:52:46,124 --> 00:52:48,168
Wasn't planning on taking it off.
1067
00:52:49,461 --> 00:52:50,628
Seriously?
1068
00:52:52,339 --> 00:52:54,341
(FOLK ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
1069
00:52:56,760 --> 00:52:58,428
(KIDS LAUGHING)
1070
00:53:20,200 --> 00:53:21,451
Last 10 seconds.
1071
00:53:21,534 --> 00:53:22,619
JILL AND TOMMY: You can do it!
1072
00:53:22,702 --> 00:53:24,120
TOMMY: Lyle, come on!
1073
00:53:24,204 --> 00:53:26,039
-Almost there!
-JILL: You can do it!
1074
00:53:26,122 --> 00:53:27,123
JILL AND TOMMY: Lyle!
1075
00:53:27,207 --> 00:53:28,291
Come on! You can do it!
1076
00:53:28,375 --> 00:53:30,001
And we have a wiener!
1077
00:53:30,085 --> 00:53:31,169
Go, Lyle!
1078
00:53:31,252 --> 00:53:33,963
VENDOR: Here you go, sir,
here's your chocolate ice cream.
1079
00:53:34,047 --> 00:53:35,465
Well, look who's here.
1080
00:53:35,548 --> 00:53:37,884
Tweedle-Dum and Tweedle-Dumber.
1081
00:53:38,593 --> 00:53:39,761
Hiya, fellas.
1082
00:53:39,844 --> 00:53:42,138
How about a little topping
for your ice cream?
1083
00:53:42,222 --> 00:53:44,140
...not fake. You don't know
what you're talking about.
1084
00:53:51,231 --> 00:53:53,817
Yuck! Even I think that's disgusting.
1085
00:53:54,693 --> 00:53:55,694
Hmm.
1086
00:54:00,448 --> 00:54:02,075
-Take care.
-Thank you. Bye.
1087
00:54:04,703 --> 00:54:06,579
Well, hello again.
1088
00:54:07,163 --> 00:54:08,665
Free trees, huh?
1089
00:54:08,748 --> 00:54:10,291
That might be
the first thing I've seen here
1090
00:54:10,417 --> 00:54:12,043
that isn't battered and deep fried.
1091
00:54:12,585 --> 00:54:14,129
How's your ongoing battle
with the woodpecker?
1092
00:54:15,797 --> 00:54:18,341
Well, I hate to admit it,
but you were right.
1093
00:54:19,342 --> 00:54:21,761
Took your advice,
made peace with it. It's...
1094
00:54:21,845 --> 00:54:24,973
It's actually been... Not awful.
1095
00:54:25,473 --> 00:54:26,474
(CHUCKLES)
1096
00:54:26,599 --> 00:54:28,518
But in another month or so,
I'll be finished.
1097
00:54:28,601 --> 00:54:30,812
I'll sell the house and adiós.
1098
00:54:31,730 --> 00:54:33,314
So problem solved.
1099
00:54:34,899 --> 00:54:36,109
Problem solved.
1100
00:54:38,069 --> 00:54:40,697
So, I was about to listen to Tommy's band.
1101
00:54:40,780 --> 00:54:42,490
They're getting ready to play.
You wanna come?
1102
00:54:42,991 --> 00:54:44,784
Yeah, sounds like fun.
1103
00:54:49,122 --> 00:54:50,331
(GROANING)
1104
00:54:50,790 --> 00:54:54,002
This is what happens
when you eat 29 hot dogs!
1105
00:54:54,085 --> 00:54:56,254
No guts, no glory.
1106
00:54:56,338 --> 00:54:58,256
Dude, are you sure you can't play?
1107
00:54:58,340 --> 00:55:00,884
Dude, I'm just trying not to blow chunks.
1108
00:55:01,343 --> 00:55:03,261
We'll be totally lame without a drummer.
1109
00:55:03,595 --> 00:55:05,638
Wouldn't it be lamer to have a drummer
1110
00:55:05,805 --> 00:55:07,807
puke all over himself on stage?
1111
00:55:08,224 --> 00:55:10,352
No, that's rock and roll!
1112
00:55:10,435 --> 00:55:11,436
-(STOMACH GRUMBLING)
-(GROANS)
1113
00:55:11,519 --> 00:55:13,605
Sorry, guys. I really wanna play,
1114
00:55:14,314 --> 00:55:15,982
but my stomach's got other plans.
1115
00:55:27,118 --> 00:55:30,538
-Well, here we go. We're up next.
-(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)
1116
00:55:30,622 --> 00:55:32,082
But we don't have a drummer.
1117
00:55:33,333 --> 00:55:35,085
So we go on without a drummer.
1118
00:55:35,960 --> 00:55:40,090
Worst case scenario is
we make total fools of ourselves.
1119
00:55:40,173 --> 00:55:41,424
Come on.
1120
00:55:41,966 --> 00:55:44,678
Okay, let's do this.
1121
00:55:44,761 --> 00:55:47,639
Now let's give a nice warm,
Pine Grove welcome
1122
00:55:47,722 --> 00:55:50,308
to our next local act, 3Peat.
1123
00:55:50,558 --> 00:55:52,352
(AUDIENCE CHEERING)
1124
00:55:59,567 --> 00:56:02,737
Hi, everyone. We're 3Peat.
1125
00:56:02,821 --> 00:56:06,408
Although, um,
at the moment, our third peat
1126
00:56:06,491 --> 00:56:09,911
is puking up hot dogs behind the barn,
1127
00:56:09,994 --> 00:56:13,331
so tonight we're just 2Peat.
1128
00:56:13,456 --> 00:56:14,457
Enjoy the show.
1129
00:56:15,000 --> 00:56:16,376
(PLAYING ROCK MUSIC)
1130
00:56:16,668 --> 00:56:17,669
(SINGING) Hey
1131
00:56:17,836 --> 00:56:19,587
(MIC SQUEALING)
1132
00:56:19,671 --> 00:56:20,922
Hey
1133
00:56:23,758 --> 00:56:26,469
Uh-oh. Sounding a little light
on percussion.
1134
00:56:27,345 --> 00:56:29,180
Hmm, what would MacGyver do?
1135
00:56:29,264 --> 00:56:30,265
(WOODY GASPS)
1136
00:56:31,016 --> 00:56:33,518
Perfect! I got this!
1137
00:56:34,269 --> 00:56:36,021
You hold me tight
1138
00:56:38,273 --> 00:56:42,152
Tell me I'm the only one
Wanna come over tonight
1139
00:56:42,235 --> 00:56:43,611
Yeah
1140
00:56:44,070 --> 00:56:46,781
Keep on whispering in my ear
1141
00:56:46,865 --> 00:56:49,701
Tell me all the things that
I wanna hear
1142
00:56:49,784 --> 00:56:50,827
'Cause it's true
1143
00:56:50,952 --> 00:56:51,995
That's what I like
1144
00:56:52,078 --> 00:56:53,496
That's what I like about you
1145
00:56:53,580 --> 00:56:54,956
That's what I like
1146
00:56:55,040 --> 00:56:56,624
What I like about you
1147
00:56:58,209 --> 00:57:00,128
You really know how to dance
1148
00:57:01,504 --> 00:57:03,798
When you go up, down
Jump around
1149
00:57:03,882 --> 00:57:06,468
Think about true romance
1150
00:57:06,551 --> 00:57:08,053
Yeah
1151
00:57:08,136 --> 00:57:09,471
(VOCALIZING)
1152
00:57:09,554 --> 00:57:11,056
Keep on whispering in my ear
1153
00:57:11,139 --> 00:57:13,558
Tell me all the things that
I wanna hear
1154
00:57:13,641 --> 00:57:14,809
'Cause that's true
1155
00:57:14,976 --> 00:57:16,102
That's what I like about you
1156
00:57:16,186 --> 00:57:17,562
That's what I like about you
1157
00:57:17,687 --> 00:57:19,064
That's what I like about you
1158
00:57:19,147 --> 00:57:20,440
That's what I like about you
1159
00:57:20,523 --> 00:57:22,025
That's what I like about you
1160
00:57:22,108 --> 00:57:23,735
That's what I like about you
1161
00:57:23,818 --> 00:57:26,071
-That's what I like about you
-(YELLS)
1162
00:57:37,123 --> 00:57:38,875
What I like about you
1163
00:57:39,834 --> 00:57:42,337
You keep me warm at night
1164
00:57:44,214 --> 00:57:45,799
Never wanna let you go
1165
00:57:45,882 --> 00:57:48,802
You know you make me feel
All right, yeah
1166
00:57:50,345 --> 00:57:53,098
Keep on whispering in my ear
1167
00:57:53,181 --> 00:57:55,225
Tell me all the things that
I wanna hear
1168
00:57:55,308 --> 00:57:56,393
'Cause that's true
1169
00:57:56,476 --> 00:57:57,936
That's what I like about you
1170
00:57:58,019 --> 00:57:59,312
That's what I like about you
1171
00:57:59,437 --> 00:58:00,772
That's what I like about you
1172
00:58:00,855 --> 00:58:02,357
That's what I like about you
1173
00:58:02,482 --> 00:58:03,900
That's what I like about you
1174
00:58:03,983 --> 00:58:05,318
That's what I like about you
1175
00:58:05,443 --> 00:58:06,778
That's what I like about you
1176
00:58:06,861 --> 00:58:09,280
That's what I like about you
1177
00:58:09,531 --> 00:58:10,990
(CHEERING AND APPLAUDING)
1178
00:58:11,783 --> 00:58:14,202
LANCE: Way to go, Tommy! Yeah!
1179
00:58:18,540 --> 00:58:21,209
Oh, yeah!
They should call this Woodystock.
1180
00:58:21,418 --> 00:58:22,502
You guys were amazing!
1181
00:58:22,585 --> 00:58:23,670
Thanks!
1182
00:58:23,753 --> 00:58:24,838
-Buddy!
-Hi!
1183
00:58:24,921 --> 00:58:27,465
I knew you could play, but I didn't know
you could play like that.
1184
00:58:27,549 --> 00:58:28,800
I'm so proud of you.
1185
00:58:28,883 --> 00:58:31,177
You are? Really?
1186
00:58:32,053 --> 00:58:33,763
Of course I am, really.
1187
00:58:34,472 --> 00:58:36,641
What do you think?
This place isn't so bad after all, is it?
1188
00:58:37,559 --> 00:58:39,144
Yeah, it doesn't totally bite.
1189
00:58:40,270 --> 00:58:41,896
It doesn't totally bite.
1190
00:58:42,480 --> 00:58:44,065
Hey! Shouldn't we be hanging backstage,
1191
00:58:44,149 --> 00:58:45,525
doing peanut butter shots with groupies?
1192
00:58:45,608 --> 00:58:46,609
Woody!
1193
00:58:46,693 --> 00:58:48,194
We totally rocked it!
1194
00:58:48,737 --> 00:58:51,239
Oh, I'm sorry, have you met Woody?
1195
00:58:51,322 --> 00:58:53,408
Enchanté, mademoiselle.
1196
00:58:54,117 --> 00:58:57,620
You really did find
a pileated red-crowned woodpecker.
1197
00:58:57,704 --> 00:58:59,122
And he's domesticated?
1198
00:58:59,289 --> 00:59:00,331
(BELCHES)
1199
00:59:00,415 --> 00:59:02,876
Yeah, that depends
on your definition of domesticated.
1200
00:59:02,959 --> 00:59:05,211
Uh, Woody here was our drummer.
1201
00:59:05,795 --> 00:59:07,172
No kidding.
1202
00:59:07,547 --> 00:59:08,840
Way to go, Woody.
1203
00:59:08,923 --> 00:59:11,593
Thanks. Always happy to help a...
1204
00:59:12,260 --> 00:59:14,512
Friend. Anyway, gotta go.
1205
00:59:14,596 --> 00:59:15,764
Time to forage.
1206
00:59:16,556 --> 00:59:17,932
I don't know about you, I am starving.
1207
00:59:18,016 --> 00:59:19,184
-Are you hungry?
-Yes.
1208
00:59:19,267 --> 00:59:21,269
I could kill a corndog.
1209
00:59:21,353 --> 00:59:27,067
And now, ladies and gentlemen,
the moment we've all been waiting for.
1210
00:59:27,150 --> 00:59:28,276
What's going on?
1211
00:59:28,443 --> 00:59:29,527
You'll see.
1212
00:59:31,029 --> 00:59:33,114
Let there be light!
1213
00:59:35,408 --> 00:59:36,951
(AUDIENCE GASPING)
1214
00:59:55,470 --> 00:59:58,139
Maybe it wouldn't be so bad
if they stuck around.
1215
00:59:58,765 --> 01:00:00,642
That gives me an idea.
1216
01:00:14,072 --> 01:00:15,490
Well, what do you know?
1217
01:00:15,573 --> 01:00:18,159
I'm a regular Pablo Peck-asso.
1218
01:00:19,411 --> 01:00:20,412
(SIGHS)
1219
01:00:20,995 --> 01:00:24,290
Maybe... Maybe I've been alone too long.
1220
01:00:25,208 --> 01:00:27,043
Just because I'm one of a kind
1221
01:00:27,127 --> 01:00:30,171
doesn't mean I can't be
part of a family, too, right?
1222
01:00:32,173 --> 01:00:34,509
Oh! I almost forgot to sign my name.
1223
01:00:37,012 --> 01:00:38,013
(YELLS)
1224
01:00:40,515 --> 01:00:42,517
(GROANING) What happened?
1225
01:00:47,522 --> 01:00:49,607
Oh, no! Ahhh!
1226
01:00:50,150 --> 01:00:52,777
What am I gonna do?
What am I gonna do? What am I gonna do?
1227
01:00:53,236 --> 01:00:54,946
(BLOWING RAPIDLY)
1228
01:00:55,030 --> 01:00:56,031
(SHUDDERS)
1229
01:00:56,114 --> 01:00:57,949
Anyone smell chicken cooking?
1230
01:00:58,033 --> 01:00:59,617
Yikes! It's me!
1231
01:01:00,869 --> 01:01:01,953
(SCREAMING)
1232
01:01:03,705 --> 01:01:04,706
(SIGHS)
1233
01:01:06,207 --> 01:01:07,667
Oh, no.
1234
01:01:08,543 --> 01:01:09,919
Oh, what did I do?
1235
01:01:12,213 --> 01:01:13,590
(INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER)
1236
01:01:16,092 --> 01:01:17,677
LANCE: It's a total loss.
1237
01:01:20,305 --> 01:01:22,223
How does this even happen?
1238
01:01:22,307 --> 01:01:24,934
I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to.
1239
01:01:25,894 --> 01:01:26,936
Oh...
1240
01:01:27,020 --> 01:01:29,272
FIREMAN: Well, I think we found
the cause of the fire.
1241
01:01:29,356 --> 01:01:32,484
Looks like something was
destroying the wall and hit the wiring.
1242
01:01:32,567 --> 01:01:36,404
It's probably a small animal.
Mouse or a rat or a bird or something.
1243
01:01:36,488 --> 01:01:37,572
Bird?
1244
01:01:38,490 --> 01:01:39,491
Like a woodpecker?
1245
01:01:41,117 --> 01:01:42,410
That's possible.
1246
01:01:47,082 --> 01:01:48,083
(GASPS)
1247
01:01:48,541 --> 01:01:50,085
-You!
-(YELPS)
1248
01:01:50,168 --> 01:01:52,170
Dad, Woody wouldn't have done this.
It couldn't have been him.
1249
01:01:52,253 --> 01:01:53,254
Really?
1250
01:01:53,338 --> 01:01:55,632
Do you see any other
psychotic animals around here?
1251
01:01:55,715 --> 01:01:57,717
-Dad, don't say that. Dad!
-It was that woodpecker.
1252
01:01:57,801 --> 01:01:59,260
-All this time...
-Come on.
1253
01:01:59,344 --> 01:02:01,846
...he's just been lulling me
into a false sense of security.
1254
01:02:01,930 --> 01:02:03,348
Waiting to strike.
1255
01:02:03,848 --> 01:02:05,308
He couldn't have.
1256
01:02:05,600 --> 01:02:08,019
It's Lance Walters. You remember me?
1257
01:02:08,728 --> 01:02:12,273
Of course we remember you, Mr. Walters.
1258
01:02:12,357 --> 01:02:13,566
How can we help you?
1259
01:02:14,734 --> 01:02:15,902
Mmm-hmm.
1260
01:02:15,985 --> 01:02:19,781
(STAMMERS) I'm sure we could
work you into our schedule.
1261
01:02:19,864 --> 01:02:22,200
Yeah, how about, um...
1262
01:02:22,283 --> 01:02:25,120
How about... How about right now?
1263
01:02:25,620 --> 01:02:28,456
I didn't mean to. Accidents happen.
1264
01:02:28,540 --> 01:02:32,168
I mean, who amongst us
hasn't burned down a house, right?
1265
01:02:32,252 --> 01:02:35,005
Oh, fine. I'll just go back
to the way it was before.
1266
01:02:35,088 --> 01:02:39,217
No humans.
Who needs them anyway, right? Right?
1267
01:02:39,718 --> 01:02:40,719
Um...
1268
01:02:40,802 --> 01:02:43,263
Don't you ever have anything to say?
1269
01:02:44,139 --> 01:02:45,807
Oh, who am I kidding?
1270
01:02:45,890 --> 01:02:48,143
I had a good thing going with those guys!
1271
01:02:49,144 --> 01:02:50,812
I gotta make it up to them.
1272
01:02:50,895 --> 01:02:53,565
Help them rebuild,
for free this time, too.
1273
01:02:53,648 --> 01:02:56,818
No food.
I could stand to lose an ounce or two.
1274
01:02:56,901 --> 01:02:58,153
(WHIRRING)
1275
01:02:58,236 --> 01:02:59,571
-(YELPING)
-(RUMBLING)
1276
01:02:59,654 --> 01:03:01,781
Earthquake!
1277
01:03:01,865 --> 01:03:03,950
Huh? (YELPING)
1278
01:03:07,203 --> 01:03:08,830
(WOODY SCREAMING)
1279
01:03:11,458 --> 01:03:13,084
(GROANING)
1280
01:03:13,543 --> 01:03:15,003
He's all yours, boys.
1281
01:03:16,004 --> 01:03:17,005
My home.
1282
01:03:19,215 --> 01:03:20,717
(EXCLAIMING)
1283
01:03:21,217 --> 01:03:23,219
Happy place.
1284
01:03:23,636 --> 01:03:24,637
(SIGHS)
1285
01:03:26,723 --> 01:03:29,476
Let me outta here!
I wasn't read my rights!
1286
01:03:29,559 --> 01:03:31,436
I'm out of order? You're out of order!
1287
01:03:31,519 --> 01:03:33,146
You can't handle the truth!
1288
01:03:33,229 --> 01:03:36,483
Yeah, stick a cork in it, you dumb bird.
1289
01:03:36,566 --> 01:03:38,568
Anyone out there know a good lawyer?
1290
01:03:38,651 --> 01:03:41,488
$500. Good job, and good riddance.
1291
01:03:41,571 --> 01:03:43,156
De nada. (CHUCKLES)
1292
01:03:43,239 --> 01:03:44,949
Potato, French fries.
1293
01:03:45,033 --> 01:03:47,160
What are you doing? You can't take Woody!
1294
01:03:47,243 --> 01:03:49,996
-Tommy, that bird burnt our house down.
-But I...
1295
01:03:50,080 --> 01:03:51,331
LANCE: So long, woodpecker.
1296
01:03:51,414 --> 01:03:54,501
To think I was actually
starting to like you.
1297
01:03:54,584 --> 01:03:56,670
-But, Dad, they're gonna kill him!
-They're not gonna kill him.
1298
01:03:56,753 --> 01:03:59,464
They're gonna take him out
in the mountains and release him.
1299
01:03:59,547 --> 01:04:02,884
Yep, he'll be free as a, um...
Free as a...
1300
01:04:02,967 --> 01:04:04,761
A bird!
1301
01:04:04,844 --> 01:04:06,930
A little on the nose, Nate.
1302
01:04:07,013 --> 01:04:09,432
I was thinking more like a wild stallion.
1303
01:04:09,516 --> 01:04:10,558
Dad.
1304
01:04:11,101 --> 01:04:12,769
Jill and Lyle and me found their barn.
1305
01:04:12,852 --> 01:04:15,021
It's filled with stuffed birds.
1306
01:04:15,105 --> 01:04:16,773
They're taxidermists.
1307
01:04:16,856 --> 01:04:19,275
They're gonna kill Woody
and stuff him, I know it.
1308
01:04:23,446 --> 01:04:24,656
You are gonna let him go, right?
1309
01:04:24,739 --> 01:04:25,949
Oh, uh...
1310
01:04:26,032 --> 01:04:27,325
I am as, uh...
1311
01:04:28,284 --> 01:04:29,285
(SPITS)
1312
01:04:29,661 --> 01:04:30,870
Good as my word.
1313
01:04:30,954 --> 01:04:32,956
Yeah, I'm cool. Thanks.
1314
01:04:35,625 --> 01:04:39,129
So long, kid.
You were the first friend I ever had.
1315
01:04:43,675 --> 01:04:45,677
I'm sorry, Woody!
1316
01:04:50,515 --> 01:04:52,308
I will never forgive you.
1317
01:04:52,517 --> 01:04:53,685
Tommy, come on.
1318
01:04:53,768 --> 01:04:56,187
Someday you'll understand
why I had to do this.
1319
01:04:56,271 --> 01:04:57,814
I understand.
1320
01:04:58,606 --> 01:05:02,110
I understand that whenever
something bothers you,
1321
01:05:02,193 --> 01:05:04,070
you get rid of it.
1322
01:05:04,320 --> 01:05:05,655
Like me and Mom.
1323
01:05:06,531 --> 01:05:08,825
Come on. That is not fair,
and you know it.
1324
01:05:09,075 --> 01:05:11,661
I'm surprised you
didn't have us stuffed, too.
1325
01:05:15,790 --> 01:05:17,125
Tommy.
1326
01:05:19,502 --> 01:05:20,503
Tommy!
1327
01:05:22,422 --> 01:05:24,799
WOODY: Yeah, you're a real tough guy
when I'm all caged up.
1328
01:05:24,883 --> 01:05:28,011
Why don't you open up the cage
and we'll step outside and do this right?
1329
01:05:28,094 --> 01:05:30,138
Have it out man to bird...
1330
01:05:30,221 --> 01:05:31,264
(MUFFLED CHATTER)
1331
01:05:31,514 --> 01:05:34,142
All chirp and no bite.
1332
01:05:34,517 --> 01:05:35,518
(GULPS)
1333
01:05:38,521 --> 01:05:39,689
(IMITATES CROWING)
1334
01:05:41,649 --> 01:05:42,650
(GRUNTS)
1335
01:05:43,109 --> 01:05:44,110
(SIGHS)
1336
01:05:45,653 --> 01:05:47,280
(TOMMY PANTING)
1337
01:05:48,323 --> 01:05:49,407
Guys, guys!
1338
01:05:49,491 --> 01:05:50,909
JILL: Checkmate!
1339
01:05:50,992 --> 01:05:53,453
Woody's been taken. I need your help.
1340
01:05:53,536 --> 01:05:55,372
-What?
-No way!
1341
01:05:57,207 --> 01:05:59,042
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
1342
01:06:18,228 --> 01:06:19,312
(SIGHS) Woody.
1343
01:06:19,938 --> 01:06:22,148
You weren't trying to burn the house down.
1344
01:06:23,566 --> 01:06:24,567
Oh, no!
1345
01:06:26,236 --> 01:06:27,904
It's showtime.
1346
01:06:28,780 --> 01:06:32,492
Gentlemen and lady.
1347
01:06:32,575 --> 01:06:38,123
This here rare bird
is the Holy Grail of rare birds.
1348
01:06:38,206 --> 01:06:42,544
I give you the legendary
1349
01:06:42,627 --> 01:06:46,923
pileated red-crowned woodpecker!
1350
01:06:47,424 --> 01:06:48,425
Hmm!
1351
01:06:49,092 --> 01:06:50,343
-(BLOWS RASPBERRY)
-One hundred years,
1352
01:06:50,427 --> 01:06:52,220
it has been thought to be extinct.
1353
01:06:52,303 --> 01:06:56,016
Not only that, Nate,
but everyone thought it had died out.
1354
01:06:56,099 --> 01:06:58,768
(SIGHS) And I'm the one
who's an endangered species?
1355
01:06:58,852 --> 01:07:01,730
Folks, the opportunity to add
1356
01:07:01,813 --> 01:07:04,774
this fine taxidermy specimen
to your collections
1357
01:07:04,858 --> 01:07:06,401
won't ever come around again.
1358
01:07:06,484 --> 01:07:10,613
The bidding will start at $100,000.
1359
01:07:10,864 --> 01:07:13,283
Do I have any takers?
1360
01:07:16,119 --> 01:07:18,830
Well, we can't go in there.
There's people there.
1361
01:07:18,913 --> 01:07:20,623
Let's see if there's a back way.
1362
01:07:22,917 --> 01:07:24,919
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
1363
01:07:29,382 --> 01:07:31,009
We should call the police.
1364
01:07:31,092 --> 01:07:33,011
They'll never believe us.
1365
01:07:33,094 --> 01:07:34,804
By the time they do, Woody will be dead.
1366
01:07:36,181 --> 01:07:38,266
NATE: $600,000... Thank you. (CHUCKLES)
1367
01:07:38,350 --> 01:07:39,601
675...
1368
01:07:39,684 --> 01:07:42,020
650, 650. Do I hear 675?
1369
01:07:42,103 --> 01:07:43,271
700...
1370
01:07:43,772 --> 01:07:45,815
(GASPS) Tommy? You came for me!
1371
01:07:45,899 --> 01:07:47,776
That's my boy.
1372
01:07:47,859 --> 01:07:50,987
NATE: $750,000, $700,000...
1373
01:07:51,071 --> 01:07:53,656
Do I hear 800? 825, 825...
1374
01:07:53,740 --> 01:07:55,241
-$850,000!
-BIDDER: Yes.
1375
01:07:55,325 --> 01:07:56,451
How do we get him out of there?
1376
01:07:56,534 --> 01:07:57,660
We gotta sneak in and steal him.
1377
01:07:57,744 --> 01:07:59,537
They'll catch us in a sec.
We have to call the police.
1378
01:07:59,621 --> 01:08:00,622
Or the National Guard.
1379
01:08:00,705 --> 01:08:02,082
No, that'll never work.
We gotta lure them out.
1380
01:08:02,207 --> 01:08:04,042
How about we pretend
we're wealthy eccentric bidders
1381
01:08:04,125 --> 01:08:06,670
who are willing to pay, like,
a million dollars for Woody?
1382
01:08:06,753 --> 01:08:08,630
-Sold!
-(ALL GASP)
1383
01:08:08,713 --> 01:08:10,465
-For a million dollars.
-TOMMY: Go, go, go!
1384
01:08:10,548 --> 01:08:11,758
(OTIS LAUGHING)
1385
01:08:12,926 --> 01:08:15,345
Going somewhere?
1386
01:08:17,138 --> 01:08:18,598
LANCE: Hey, Sam, have you seen Tommy?
1387
01:08:18,682 --> 01:08:20,183
No, why?
1388
01:08:20,266 --> 01:08:22,143
I thought the woodpecker
burnt my house down on purpose
1389
01:08:22,227 --> 01:08:24,604
so I hired the Grimes brothers
to capture and get rid of it.
1390
01:08:24,688 --> 01:08:26,189
He's pretty upset with me.
1391
01:08:26,272 --> 01:08:28,441
-Any chance he might try and rescue it?
-Yeah, maybe.
1392
01:08:28,775 --> 01:08:30,694
I know where the Grimes place is. Come on.
1393
01:08:31,069 --> 01:08:35,281
$900,000, going twice...
1394
01:08:37,826 --> 01:08:39,369
Sold! Ha-ha!
1395
01:08:39,452 --> 01:08:41,955
To the guy in the funny-looking hat.
1396
01:08:42,038 --> 01:08:43,957
Thank you all so much for bidding.
1397
01:08:44,040 --> 01:08:46,876
Winner, you have
our electronic transfer information.
1398
01:08:46,960 --> 01:08:49,713
Funds are due in 10 minutes.
1399
01:08:50,922 --> 01:08:51,923
(BEEPS)
1400
01:08:54,134 --> 01:08:55,468
(LAUGHING)
1401
01:08:56,219 --> 01:08:58,221
(IMITATES MONKEY CHATTERING)
1402
01:09:02,726 --> 01:09:05,061
I hope you all are comfortable...
1403
01:09:06,438 --> 01:09:09,899
If you two so much as touch
a hair on my friends' heads,
1404
01:09:09,983 --> 01:09:11,526
I'll peck you new ones.
1405
01:09:11,609 --> 01:09:13,528
And I ain't talking about nostrils.
1406
01:09:13,611 --> 01:09:17,574
Squawk it up, bird.
It's the last noise you'll ever make.
1407
01:09:18,700 --> 01:09:21,453
Just so you know,
you're going to jail for this.
1408
01:09:21,536 --> 01:09:25,081
Well, just so you know,
not if they can't catch us.
1409
01:09:25,165 --> 01:09:28,335
And we're not sticking around
to get caught.
1410
01:09:28,418 --> 01:09:32,630
We just sold that little bird
for close to a million dollars. Stuffed.
1411
01:09:32,714 --> 01:09:37,260
Otis and me are officially
retiring to Ka-Ching City.
1412
01:09:37,344 --> 01:09:41,723
Ka-Ching City, that's in China. (CHUCKLES)
1413
01:09:43,475 --> 01:09:44,476
What?
1414
01:09:44,559 --> 01:09:45,560
Start loading the truck.
1415
01:09:46,227 --> 01:09:47,395
Please.
1416
01:09:57,947 --> 01:09:59,699
(CHUCKLING SOFTLY)
1417
01:10:00,867 --> 01:10:04,120
Excuse me, Mr. Poacher, sir,
is that poison gluten-free?
1418
01:10:05,455 --> 01:10:07,332
Aw, don't worry, bird.
1419
01:10:07,457 --> 01:10:12,128
This is just gonna be like
taking a nap, forever.
1420
01:10:12,212 --> 01:10:13,630
Don't do this!
1421
01:10:13,713 --> 01:10:17,217
Whatever you're getting for Woody,
my dad will pay double!
1422
01:10:17,842 --> 01:10:20,470
I thought you said your dad was broke?
1423
01:10:20,804 --> 01:10:21,805
(CLEARS THROAT)
1424
01:10:22,055 --> 01:10:25,475
Oh! You were bluffing. My bad.
1425
01:10:37,946 --> 01:10:40,156
-Nate?
-(HONKING CAR HORN)
1426
01:10:40,240 --> 01:10:41,574
Now what?
1427
01:10:42,200 --> 01:10:43,410
Nate?
1428
01:10:44,077 --> 01:10:45,286
Otis, are you...
1429
01:10:48,707 --> 01:10:50,333
OTIS: Well, howdy, Mr. Walters.
1430
01:10:50,417 --> 01:10:52,252
What can I do you for?
1431
01:10:52,335 --> 01:10:54,671
You got a moose problem now or...
1432
01:10:54,796 --> 01:10:55,839
I was looking for Tommy.
1433
01:10:55,922 --> 01:10:57,841
He was pretty upset about
the whole woodpecker thing
1434
01:10:57,924 --> 01:11:00,343
and I thought he might have
come up here looking for it.
1435
01:11:00,427 --> 01:11:02,721
Well, you know how kids are about animals.
1436
01:11:02,804 --> 01:11:05,849
I'm sure he'll be fine in a couple days.
1437
01:11:05,932 --> 01:11:08,018
I'll, uh... I'll keep an eye out for him.
1438
01:11:08,101 --> 01:11:09,102
Well...
1439
01:11:10,103 --> 01:11:11,104
See you around.
1440
01:11:12,605 --> 01:11:14,107
You guys going somewhere?
1441
01:11:14,941 --> 01:11:16,026
(STAMMERS) No.
1442
01:11:16,526 --> 01:11:22,365
Our, um, barn has
a termite problem. (CHUCKLES)
1443
01:11:22,449 --> 01:11:24,909
We're just clearing out
while we fumigate the place.
1444
01:11:24,993 --> 01:11:27,412
Yeah, you do not wanna
breathe those chemicals.
1445
01:11:27,495 --> 01:11:29,080
I learnt that the hard way.
1446
01:11:31,082 --> 01:11:32,125
Wait a minute.
1447
01:11:34,961 --> 01:11:36,046
I want the woodpecker back.
1448
01:11:36,129 --> 01:11:37,797
-You do?
-You do?
1449
01:11:37,881 --> 01:11:39,174
Yeah, I do.
1450
01:11:39,799 --> 01:11:42,010
If that's what it takes
to make my son happy, it's worth it.
1451
01:11:42,093 --> 01:11:46,389
I'm real sorry, Mr. Walters, we...
We already let him go.
1452
01:11:46,473 --> 01:11:47,599
LANCE: You did?
1453
01:11:47,682 --> 01:11:51,311
Yeah, he's probably flapping his way
to Saskatchewan by now.
1454
01:11:51,436 --> 01:11:53,229
Come on, Lance. Let's go find Tommy.
1455
01:11:54,981 --> 01:11:57,901
Good luck finding your, you know, kid.
1456
01:12:03,365 --> 01:12:06,785
Otis, let's stuff that bird
and get the heck outta Dodge.
1457
01:12:10,663 --> 01:12:11,706
What are you doing?
1458
01:12:11,956 --> 01:12:13,416
For the past year, I've been finding these
1459
01:12:13,500 --> 01:12:15,210
wherever there's been poaching.
1460
01:12:15,293 --> 01:12:17,045
It has to be them.
1461
01:12:17,128 --> 01:12:18,838
And I'd bet anything
they still have Woody.
1462
01:12:20,090 --> 01:12:23,510
Get the gun, Otis.
It's time to wrap this up.
1463
01:12:23,593 --> 01:12:24,594
-Please don't!
-Stop! No!
1464
01:12:24,678 --> 01:12:25,679
Don't do this!
1465
01:12:25,762 --> 01:12:26,971
Hey, don't I get a last request?
1466
01:12:27,055 --> 01:12:28,098
Like, you let me go?
1467
01:12:28,223 --> 01:12:29,974
TOMMY: No, please, no, no, no!
1468
01:12:30,058 --> 01:12:31,309
LYLE: Please!
1469
01:12:32,268 --> 01:12:33,395
Hold it right there!
1470
01:12:34,729 --> 01:12:35,855
We're saved!
1471
01:12:35,939 --> 01:12:37,857
Oh, you two are so going down!
1472
01:12:38,566 --> 01:12:39,693
What the hell?
1473
01:12:39,776 --> 01:12:42,445
-Dad!
-You put my son in a cage?
1474
01:12:45,699 --> 01:12:47,033
Well, that was disappointing.
1475
01:12:47,492 --> 01:12:48,493
(GROANS)
1476
01:12:59,921 --> 01:13:01,256
The sheriff's on his way.
1477
01:13:01,339 --> 01:13:05,593
We'll be well over the Canadian border
by the time he gets here.
1478
01:13:08,013 --> 01:13:10,265
Otis, get me my gun.
1479
01:13:10,348 --> 01:13:12,767
Dad, I'm so sorry.
1480
01:13:12,851 --> 01:13:14,728
I just couldn't let them kill Woody.
1481
01:13:14,811 --> 01:13:16,354
Tommy, this is not your fault.
1482
01:13:17,480 --> 01:13:20,150
If I'd listened to you in the first place,
we wouldn't be here.
1483
01:13:21,568 --> 01:13:23,111
Uh, real heartfelt moment,
1484
01:13:23,194 --> 01:13:25,030
but can we please save
the schmaltz for later?
1485
01:13:25,113 --> 01:13:28,033
In case you didn't notice,
I'm about to get stuffed!
1486
01:13:28,116 --> 01:13:30,368
-This time
-(COCKS GUN)
1487
01:13:30,452 --> 01:13:32,245
no interruptions.
1488
01:13:33,204 --> 01:13:34,205
(WHIMPERS)
1489
01:13:36,791 --> 01:13:38,877
Guess we can kiss the sequel goodbye.
1490
01:13:42,714 --> 01:13:45,467
-(GRUNTING)
-That cage was built to hold a bear.
1491
01:13:45,550 --> 01:13:47,677
You can't escape.
1492
01:13:50,055 --> 01:13:51,973
Who said anything about me getting out?
1493
01:13:54,517 --> 01:13:55,518
Huh? Hmm.
1494
01:13:55,769 --> 01:13:56,770
(CHUCKLES)
1495
01:13:57,270 --> 01:13:59,647
Get ready for a beatdown!
1496
01:13:59,731 --> 01:14:01,441
Oh, crud!
1497
01:14:02,400 --> 01:14:04,235
-(BOTH YELLING)
-(WOODY GRUNTING)
1498
01:14:04,527 --> 01:14:06,821
I wonder who's gonna win.
The suspense is killing me!
1499
01:14:06,905 --> 01:14:09,074
Take this, and some of these!
1500
01:14:10,367 --> 01:14:11,910
Where do you think you're going?
1501
01:14:12,118 --> 01:14:13,912
-(YELLS)
-(OTIS CRYING)
1502
01:14:14,496 --> 01:14:15,497
(GRUNTING)
1503
01:14:15,830 --> 01:14:16,831
(GROANS)
1504
01:14:18,416 --> 01:14:21,670
Now that's what I call
taking out the trailer trash.
1505
01:14:22,045 --> 01:14:23,588
(BOTH GROANING)
1506
01:14:23,797 --> 01:14:25,340
Nice job, Woody.
1507
01:14:25,423 --> 01:14:27,258
Hey, I got your back.
1508
01:14:28,968 --> 01:14:29,969
Heads up!
1509
01:14:30,553 --> 01:14:32,180
(SIRENS BLARING)
1510
01:14:32,347 --> 01:14:33,348
(STAMMERS)
1511
01:14:33,723 --> 01:14:35,266
NATE: Otis! Otis!
1512
01:14:35,350 --> 01:14:36,601
Woody, don't let them get away!
1513
01:14:36,851 --> 01:14:39,020
-(BOTH GASPING)
-Woody, go get 'em!
1514
01:14:39,104 --> 01:14:40,605
-TOMMY: Stop him!
-I'm on it!
1515
01:14:42,065 --> 01:14:43,858
Stop in the name of the law!
1516
01:14:43,942 --> 01:14:45,402
-(YELLS)
-(EXCLAIMS)
1517
01:14:45,985 --> 01:14:46,986
Ooh.
1518
01:14:48,905 --> 01:14:50,240
(STRAINING)
1519
01:14:53,660 --> 01:14:55,078
-The truck!
-Keys!
1520
01:14:55,412 --> 01:14:57,163
-(BOTH YELL)
-The ATV.
1521
01:14:57,247 --> 01:14:59,582
Come on! We'll take the logging trail
across the border. Go!
1522
01:15:09,843 --> 01:15:11,553
(WOODY STRAINING)
1523
01:15:14,222 --> 01:15:15,265
Ah!
1524
01:15:16,057 --> 01:15:17,058
I got this.
1525
01:15:19,060 --> 01:15:21,354
Ah, cue the action chase music.
1526
01:15:24,607 --> 01:15:26,651
(FAST-TEMPO ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
1527
01:15:31,948 --> 01:15:32,949
Ha-ha.
1528
01:15:38,371 --> 01:15:40,290
I'm coming to get you!
1529
01:15:48,840 --> 01:15:49,841
Whoa!
1530
01:15:51,009 --> 01:15:52,302
(EXCLAIMING)
1531
01:16:01,311 --> 01:16:02,354
OTIS: I think we lost him!
1532
01:16:02,437 --> 01:16:04,189
Well, come on, let's go!
1533
01:16:07,233 --> 01:16:08,234
(GRUNTING)
1534
01:16:08,735 --> 01:16:10,195
OTIS: Kick it! Come on!
1535
01:16:10,487 --> 01:16:11,488
(GRUNTS)
1536
01:16:12,614 --> 01:16:13,865
(BOTH PANTING)
1537
01:16:15,408 --> 01:16:16,743
WOODY: Going somewhere?
1538
01:16:18,453 --> 01:16:20,789
Oh, hello, eh! Welcome to Canada.
1539
01:16:21,831 --> 01:16:23,333
Do you have anything to declare?
1540
01:16:23,416 --> 01:16:24,584
Quick. Let's go back!
1541
01:16:24,709 --> 01:16:25,835
Get a grip!
1542
01:16:25,919 --> 01:16:28,213
He's just one little bird!
There's two of us.
1543
01:16:28,797 --> 01:16:30,590
(YELLING)
1544
01:16:32,175 --> 01:16:34,678
Make your move, bird.
1545
01:16:34,761 --> 01:16:36,388
A knife? (IMITATES CHICKEN CLUCKING)
1546
01:16:37,681 --> 01:16:39,182
(LAUGHING)
1547
01:16:39,933 --> 01:16:42,560
I told you!
He's more chicken than woodpecker!
1548
01:16:42,644 --> 01:16:43,645
(PECKING)
1549
01:16:44,896 --> 01:16:45,897
Huh?
1550
01:16:53,905 --> 01:16:54,906
(BOTH YELLING)
1551
01:16:55,865 --> 01:16:57,409
And for this week's lesson...
1552
01:16:58,743 --> 01:16:59,828
Gravity!
1553
01:16:59,911 --> 01:17:01,037
Toodle-oo!
1554
01:17:05,750 --> 01:17:07,002
(LAUGHING)
1555
01:17:08,128 --> 01:17:10,255
(OTIS AND NATE PANTING)
1556
01:17:22,767 --> 01:17:23,810
Going somewhere?
1557
01:17:25,186 --> 01:17:27,230
Heya, fellas. Remember me?
1558
01:17:28,023 --> 01:17:29,566
Save us!
1559
01:17:29,649 --> 01:17:31,067
Please! Lock us up!
1560
01:17:31,860 --> 01:17:32,986
-Lock us up!
-Save us!
1561
01:17:34,320 --> 01:17:37,407
I have been waiting for this day
for a very long time.
1562
01:17:37,490 --> 01:17:39,534
That bird is crazy.
1563
01:17:40,660 --> 01:17:41,953
Who you calling crazy?
1564
01:17:42,162 --> 01:17:44,039
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
1565
01:17:46,958 --> 01:17:49,044
Now it's your turn to live in a cage. Ha!
1566
01:17:50,086 --> 01:17:51,338
LANCE: So, what do you think?
1567
01:17:51,421 --> 01:17:53,089
TOMMY: It's pretty cool, Dad.
SAM: It's beautiful.
1568
01:17:53,173 --> 01:17:55,425
LANCE: If you think it's beautiful now,
wait till it's actually built.
1569
01:17:55,508 --> 01:17:57,427
Good thing my insurance
covered woodpecker damage.
1570
01:17:57,552 --> 01:17:59,387
Well, I think you're
gonna be very happy here.
1571
01:17:59,471 --> 01:18:01,389
And since it's a smaller footprint,
1572
01:18:01,473 --> 01:18:03,224
there'll be plenty of room
for the nine-hole golf course.
1573
01:18:03,892 --> 01:18:06,353
I'm surprised you didn't wanna
build a shopping mall.
1574
01:18:06,436 --> 01:18:08,605
What an amazing idea.
1575
01:18:08,688 --> 01:18:10,857
Oh, Dad, the surprise?
1576
01:18:10,940 --> 01:18:12,609
Oh, right. Saved the best for last.
1577
01:18:12,692 --> 01:18:14,194
Hey, Woody?
1578
01:18:14,277 --> 01:18:15,528
Oh, Woody?
1579
01:18:15,612 --> 01:18:16,863
Is it food o'clock?
1580
01:18:16,946 --> 01:18:19,866
Woody, I am very sorry
I destroyed your home.
1581
01:18:19,949 --> 01:18:22,285
But technically,
you destroyed mine first, so we're even.
1582
01:18:22,369 --> 01:18:25,622
But in the interest of harmonious living,
I got something for you.
1583
01:18:26,122 --> 01:18:27,290
Huh?
1584
01:18:28,458 --> 01:18:29,626
Ready?
1585
01:18:31,461 --> 01:18:33,004
(GASPS) Woo-hoo!
1586
01:18:33,088 --> 01:18:35,507
I got a home again! (GASPS)
1587
01:18:35,590 --> 01:18:38,927
It's got built-in appliances
and granite countertops!
1588
01:18:39,010 --> 01:18:40,387
All right!
1589
01:18:42,138 --> 01:18:44,182
You guys are my family now.
1590
01:18:44,265 --> 01:18:45,975
I never even knew I needed one.
1591
01:18:47,018 --> 01:18:48,978
Aw, he's giving you love taps.
1592
01:18:49,437 --> 01:18:51,898
Ow. Ow. Too much love, Woody.
Woody, I got it!
1593
01:18:55,777 --> 01:18:56,903
TOMMY: Night, Dad.
1594
01:18:57,362 --> 01:18:58,488
Good night, Tommy.
1595
01:19:16,548 --> 01:19:17,966
(PECKING)
1596
01:19:32,856 --> 01:19:34,065
Home sweet home!
1597
01:19:35,066 --> 01:19:37,027
(SIGHS) Don't you just love happy endings?
1598
01:19:37,277 --> 01:19:38,778
(YELLS) Whoops.
1599
01:19:39,779 --> 01:19:40,780
(BOTH GASP)
1600
01:19:41,197 --> 01:19:42,198
Huh?
1601
01:19:42,532 --> 01:19:43,867
(CHUCKLING) My bad.
1602
01:19:43,950 --> 01:19:45,201
Woody!
1603
01:19:45,285 --> 01:19:46,327
Gotta fly!
1604
01:19:46,536 --> 01:19:47,912
(LAUGHING)
1605
01:19:49,748 --> 01:19:51,041
(CHOKES)
1606
01:19:51,416 --> 01:19:54,461
Boy, someone's in a hurry
for the credits. See you!
1607
01:19:54,711 --> 01:19:56,713
(MUSIC PLAYING)
1608
01:25:14,989 --> 01:25:15,990
(PECKING)
1609
01:25:16,074 --> 01:25:17,200
Guess who?
1610
01:25:20,120 --> 01:25:22,080
(LAUGHING)
1611
01:25:45,061 --> 01:25:49,691
TOUR GUIDE: Niagara Falls is one of
the most scenic spots in all the world.
1612
01:25:50,483 --> 01:25:52,819
The grandeur of this famous attraction
1613
01:25:52,902 --> 01:25:55,655
brings visitors from far and near.
1614
01:25:55,739 --> 01:25:57,866
It is a favorite spot for honeymooners,
1615
01:25:57,949 --> 01:26:01,036
who stand and gaze at its wondrous beauty.
1616
01:26:01,703 --> 01:26:03,121
(CLEARS THROAT)
1617
01:26:03,246 --> 01:26:06,458
Niagara affects
different people in different ways.
1618
01:26:06,541 --> 01:26:09,502
Some people are overcome by a strong urge
1619
01:26:09,586 --> 01:26:11,796
to go over the falls in a barrel.
1620
01:26:11,880 --> 01:26:16,051
Of course this foolhardy stunt
is now absolutely prohibited.
1621
01:26:16,134 --> 01:26:21,222
And, I might add, nobody has gone over
since I've been on the job.
1622
01:26:21,306 --> 01:26:22,307
Nobody?
1623
01:26:22,390 --> 01:26:23,391
Nobody.
1624
01:26:23,475 --> 01:26:24,976
And I... (GASPS)
1625
01:26:25,060 --> 01:26:26,144
A barrel?
1626
01:26:26,936 --> 01:26:31,524
Hey, you, going over the falls
in a barrel is absolutely prohibited.
1627
01:26:37,572 --> 01:26:39,741
Hey! Come back with my barrel!
1628
01:26:45,121 --> 01:26:46,122
Yikes!
1629
01:26:46,623 --> 01:26:49,542
No, no! No!
1630
01:26:53,880 --> 01:26:56,758
ALL: Hooray!
1631
01:27:00,178 --> 01:27:01,471
(WOMAN GIGGLING)
1632
01:27:08,144 --> 01:27:10,355
Well, now I need a new barrel.
1633
01:27:13,066 --> 01:27:14,776
Good barrel.
1634
01:27:14,859 --> 01:27:17,529
Good solid barrel.
1635
01:27:18,571 --> 01:27:19,864
(GRUNTS)
1636
01:27:21,825 --> 01:27:22,826
(GASPS)
1637
01:27:22,909 --> 01:27:24,077
Bring back my barrel!
1638
01:27:25,870 --> 01:27:28,331
ALL: Hooray!
1639
01:27:42,053 --> 01:27:45,598
Come out of there, you crazy woodpecker!
1640
01:27:45,682 --> 01:27:49,185
I'll show you! Take that. Now keep out!
1641
01:27:50,186 --> 01:27:51,813
And stay out!
1642
01:27:54,983 --> 01:27:56,568
Oh, no!
1643
01:27:56,651 --> 01:27:57,902
(SOBBING)
1644
01:27:59,154 --> 01:28:00,280
ALL: Hooray!
1645
01:28:00,488 --> 01:28:02,532
Oh, shut up!
1646
01:28:17,589 --> 01:28:18,757
(WOLF-WHISTLES)
1647
01:28:22,594 --> 01:28:23,720
A barrel!
1648
01:28:26,639 --> 01:28:29,100
I know a barrel when I see one.
1649
01:28:29,184 --> 01:28:30,185
(YELPS)
1650
01:28:38,568 --> 01:28:40,779
ALL: Hooray!
1651
01:28:58,088 --> 01:29:00,507
ALL: Hooray!
1652
01:29:06,888 --> 01:29:08,932
(TRUCK HORN BEEPING)
1653
01:29:10,517 --> 01:29:11,893
That woodpecker!
1654
01:29:11,976 --> 01:29:13,228
(BLOWING WHISTLE)
1655
01:29:24,614 --> 01:29:29,494
Before we go over now, men,
is there anyone here without a barrel?
1656
01:29:32,372 --> 01:29:34,958
ALL: Hooray!
1657
01:29:50,348 --> 01:29:52,934
(SHIVERING) Which way to Niagara Falls?
1658
01:29:57,355 --> 01:29:58,898
(HUMMING TUNE)
1659
01:30:00,316 --> 01:30:01,359
Mush.
1660
01:30:02,986 --> 01:30:04,988
(CONTINUES HUMMING)
1661
01:30:05,655 --> 01:30:06,865
Mush.
1662
01:30:07,907 --> 01:30:09,909
(CONTINUES HUMMING)
1663
01:30:10,869 --> 01:30:11,870
Mush.
1664
01:30:13,371 --> 01:30:15,373
(CONTINUES HUMMING)
1665
01:30:16,708 --> 01:30:17,751
Mush.
1666
01:30:19,502 --> 01:30:21,546
(CONTINUES HUMMING)
1667
01:30:26,551 --> 01:30:27,886
(CHILD CRYING)
1668
01:30:28,386 --> 01:30:29,429
Hush.
1669
01:30:29,888 --> 01:30:31,890
(CONTINUES HUMMING)
1670
01:30:33,767 --> 01:30:34,851
Mush.
1671
01:30:35,185 --> 01:30:36,978
(CONTINUES HUMMING)
1672
01:30:50,241 --> 01:30:53,745
TOUR GUIDE: Now we'll see
who's going over the falls in a barrel.
1673
01:30:56,915 --> 01:30:58,541
(WATER RUSHING)
1674
01:30:59,918 --> 01:31:01,252
ALL: Hooray!
1675
01:31:01,628 --> 01:31:03,254
(SIREN WAILING)
1676
01:31:04,005 --> 01:31:07,634
So, going over the falls in a barrel, eh?
1677
01:31:07,717 --> 01:31:09,260
I'm giving you a ticket.
1678
01:31:10,970 --> 01:31:12,764
(LAUGHING)
1679
01:31:15,600 --> 01:31:17,602
(MUSIC PLAYING)
116490
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