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1
00:00:04,890 --> 00:00:07,453
And... here you go, babe.
2
00:00:07,648 --> 00:00:08,814
You made coffee?
3
00:00:08,816 --> 00:00:10,296
(chuckles) Better. Kona.
4
00:00:10,321 --> 00:00:11,976
I was really looking forward to coffee,
5
00:00:12,001 --> 00:00:13,768
but I'll give it a shot.
6
00:00:14,088 --> 00:00:17,256
- Can I push the thing down?
- Not until the duck quacks.
7
00:00:18,259 --> 00:00:19,458
(duck quacking)
8
00:00:19,460 --> 00:00:20,759
Uh. Uh-uh.
9
00:00:20,761 --> 00:00:22,343
And now.
10
00:00:29,036 --> 00:00:31,370
Oh. Oh. Don't cry.
11
00:00:31,372 --> 00:00:33,023
You did good.
12
00:00:33,540 --> 00:00:35,117
No, it's just...
13
00:00:35,609 --> 00:00:39,248
all my life, I've seen people in
TV commercials living like this.
14
00:00:39,273 --> 00:00:40,412
Mm. (chuckles)
15
00:00:40,414 --> 00:00:42,514
I never thought it would happen to me.
16
00:00:42,516 --> 00:00:46,625
Well, it's happening,
and... it's not gonna stop.
17
00:00:46,921 --> 00:00:48,430
- Really?
- Mm-hmm.
18
00:00:48,455 --> 00:00:50,389
There's gonna be fluffy
robes, fluffy dogs
19
00:00:50,391 --> 00:00:52,671
and push-down coffee forever?
20
00:00:53,591 --> 00:00:56,425
- You want me to lie to you?
- Sure.
21
00:00:56,530 --> 00:00:59,298
(groans) I wish I didn't
have to go home tonight.
22
00:00:59,300 --> 00:01:01,373
Yeah, me, too. But, you know,
23
00:01:01,398 --> 00:01:03,389
it's... it's hours
away. I'll tell you what.
24
00:01:03,414 --> 00:01:04,710
Why don't we take a walk on the beach,
25
00:01:04,735 --> 00:01:07,436
and then we'll warm up on the
pier with some clam chowder.
26
00:01:07,641 --> 00:01:09,474
In sourdough bowls?
27
00:01:09,476 --> 00:01:12,578
Well, they're always
disappointing, but sure.
28
00:01:12,980 --> 00:01:14,346
(timer dings)
29
00:01:14,348 --> 00:01:15,981
Mm. What's that?
30
00:01:15,983 --> 00:01:17,316
Our scones are ready.
31
00:01:17,318 --> 00:01:20,085
Scones? (exhales)
32
00:01:20,625 --> 00:01:23,593
Kiss me, so I know this is
really happening. (chuckles)
33
00:01:24,825 --> 00:01:27,092
♪ Sunshine, lollipops and ♪
34
00:01:27,094 --> 00:01:29,828
♪ Rainbows, everything
that's wonderful ♪
35
00:01:29,830 --> 00:01:32,798
♪ Is what I feel
when we're together ♪
36
00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:35,801
- ♪ Brighter than a lucky penny ♪
- (engine grinding)
37
00:01:35,803 --> 00:01:37,869
♪ When you're near the rain... ♪
38
00:01:37,871 --> 00:01:40,405
(engine knocking, sputtering)
39
00:01:41,642 --> 00:01:43,008
(engine stops)
40
00:01:43,010 --> 00:01:44,509
(steam hissing)
41
00:01:44,511 --> 00:01:47,142
And I'm me again.
42
00:01:48,182 --> 00:01:49,481
(groans)
43
00:01:54,564 --> 00:01:58,165
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --
44
00:02:04,939 --> 00:02:08,806
Hamilton. We had tickets to Hamilton.
45
00:02:08,831 --> 00:02:11,232
It was a high school production, Bonnie.
46
00:02:11,954 --> 00:02:13,782
Still a tough ticket.
47
00:02:14,626 --> 00:02:16,826
I'm sorry. I know it's an imposition,
48
00:02:16,828 --> 00:02:19,162
but my car is completely dead.
49
00:02:19,164 --> 00:02:21,571
Why did you call us instead of Patrick?
50
00:02:21,967 --> 00:02:24,515
Because he's a new boyfriend
and everything's perfect.
51
00:02:24,540 --> 00:02:27,570
I don't want him to
know what a mess I am.
52
00:02:27,572 --> 00:02:29,773
You live with your mom
and you're an alcoholic;
53
00:02:29,775 --> 00:02:31,454
those are fairly large bread crumbs.
54
00:02:32,907 --> 00:02:34,644
What'd the mechanic say?
55
00:02:34,900 --> 00:02:36,646
That I should have changed my oil
56
00:02:36,648 --> 00:02:38,665
at least once since I got the car.
57
00:02:39,151 --> 00:02:40,611
You never changed your oil?
58
00:02:40,636 --> 00:02:43,486
I meant to. I even
put a Post-it in my car
59
00:02:43,488 --> 00:02:44,791
that said “change oil.”
60
00:02:45,223 --> 00:02:48,400
And then I put my gum in it,
and that was five years ago.
61
00:02:50,372 --> 00:02:52,305
How are you gonna get by without a car?
62
00:02:52,720 --> 00:02:55,532
- I thought maybe my mom...
- Nope!
63
00:02:55,534 --> 00:02:58,968
- Please?
- My car has 400,000 miles on it.
64
00:02:58,970 --> 00:03:01,142
One week with your crazy
schedule, and it'll just be me
65
00:03:01,167 --> 00:03:04,145
taping you to 50 balloons,
hoping for the best.
66
00:03:05,455 --> 00:03:07,811
Well, can I at least
hitch a ride to meetings?
67
00:03:07,813 --> 00:03:09,279
(sighs) Of course.
68
00:03:09,281 --> 00:03:11,514
But I am listening to
Spanish language tapes,
69
00:03:11,516 --> 00:03:14,540
so you'll have to
shut-o El trap-o.
70
00:03:16,117 --> 00:03:17,257
Christy, I'd lend you
71
00:03:17,282 --> 00:03:19,556
my van, but it's all
set up for me to drive.
72
00:03:20,345 --> 00:03:23,228
Thanks.
I'll figure something out.
73
00:03:32,337 --> 00:03:34,504
- Watch it.
- Oh, I'm so sorry.
74
00:03:34,506 --> 00:03:36,106
- Ow!
- I'm sorry.
75
00:03:36,108 --> 00:03:37,407
I'm sorry, I-I have to carry
76
00:03:37,409 --> 00:03:39,197
all my stuff in my
bag; my car broke down.
77
00:03:39,222 --> 00:03:40,844
No one cares!
78
00:03:40,846 --> 00:03:42,412
(brakes hiss)
79
00:03:42,414 --> 00:03:44,080
(shrieks)
80
00:03:48,453 --> 00:03:50,587
Oh, man. Come on, come
on, come on, come on.
81
00:03:50,589 --> 00:03:52,064
- Nope.
- What?
82
00:03:52,089 --> 00:03:54,824
The Warriors are down by
two with three minutes to go,
83
00:03:54,826 --> 00:03:57,498
and every time you come in
this room, Steph Curry misses.
84
00:03:58,653 --> 00:04:01,231
I got up to make you a sandwich.
85
00:04:01,233 --> 00:04:03,381
And the minute you left,
he nailed a three-pointer.
86
00:04:03,862 --> 00:04:06,796
- You're insane.
- Steph's open. Take the shot!
87
00:04:06,821 --> 00:04:09,122
Oh, you're killing me!
88
00:04:11,451 --> 00:04:14,210
Do you know how many
babies throw up on the bus?
89
00:04:14,478 --> 00:04:16,211
All of them.
90
00:04:16,518 --> 00:04:18,051
They ought to change the song.
91
00:04:18,076 --> 00:04:20,110
♪ The babies on the
bus throw up, up, up. ♪
92
00:04:22,022 --> 00:04:23,537
Are you having dinner?
93
00:04:23,562 --> 00:04:26,656
Nope. I've got 15 minutes
to wash this day off of me,
94
00:04:26,658 --> 00:04:28,491
change my clothes, and
head out to Patrick's.
95
00:04:28,493 --> 00:04:30,895
It's a bus to a train to
another bus, but it's worth it.
96
00:04:30,920 --> 00:04:32,676
Is it? 'Cause you seem
a little stressed out.
97
00:04:32,701 --> 00:04:35,254
Really? You picking
up on that, Dr. Phil?
98
00:04:36,778 --> 00:04:38,918
And, by the way, who goes,
99
00:04:38,943 --> 00:04:41,778
“Hey, I'm on a bus, time
to shave my calluses”?
100
00:04:41,915 --> 00:04:43,415
Wow. Hey.
101
00:04:43,589 --> 00:04:45,660
How about I give you
a ride to the station?
102
00:04:45,685 --> 00:04:47,886
Oh, man. How about you have
this conversation in the kitchen?
103
00:04:47,911 --> 00:04:49,677
'Cause he just missed another shot.
104
00:04:49,948 --> 00:04:51,939
I'm sorry, Steph,
there's two of them now.
105
00:04:52,900 --> 00:04:55,185
Thanks, Mom. That'd be great.
106
00:04:55,187 --> 00:04:57,353
TV ANNOUNCER: ... third
foul of the night...
107
00:04:57,355 --> 00:04:59,489
- (sighs)
- (mutes TV)
108
00:04:59,491 --> 00:05:02,002
You may stand near me; it's a time-out.
109
00:05:05,806 --> 00:05:07,597
She looks awful.
110
00:05:07,599 --> 00:05:09,588
How long can she keep
going on like this?
111
00:05:09,613 --> 00:05:11,298
I don't know. She's pretty tough.
112
00:05:11,323 --> 00:05:13,523
For one whole year,
she slept in a drawer.
113
00:05:14,970 --> 00:05:18,546
- A lot of babies sleep in drawers.
- No, she was 13.
114
00:05:18,944 --> 00:05:20,838
She fit in a drawer when she was 13?
115
00:05:20,863 --> 00:05:22,369
She fits now.
116
00:05:24,056 --> 00:05:25,348
Listen,
117
00:05:25,350 --> 00:05:28,455
what if I lend Christy the money
for a down payment on a car?
118
00:05:28,480 --> 00:05:30,630
That is so kind of you,
119
00:05:30,655 --> 00:05:33,736
but if you do, I will punch
you right in the throat.
120
00:05:34,298 --> 00:05:36,626
- Why?
- Because I love you.
121
00:05:36,628 --> 00:05:39,395
- What?
- You lend her money,
122
00:05:39,397 --> 00:05:42,181
she can't pay you back,
she starts avoiding you,
123
00:05:42,206 --> 00:05:44,400
you start complaining to
me, I bring it up to her,
124
00:05:44,402 --> 00:05:46,636
she tells me to go to
hell, I get mad at you,
125
00:05:46,638 --> 00:05:48,838
you and I break up, and
I'm stuck with my backup guy
126
00:05:48,840 --> 00:05:50,564
at the tire department at Costco.
127
00:05:53,689 --> 00:05:55,545
You have a backup guy?
128
00:05:55,547 --> 00:05:58,381
Please. Like you wouldn't
drive straight from my funeral
129
00:05:58,383 --> 00:06:00,744
to Trader Joe's to pick up Louise.
130
00:06:01,186 --> 00:06:03,319
(forced chuckle): What?
131
00:06:03,321 --> 00:06:04,760
Is that her name?
132
00:06:04,785 --> 00:06:06,572
Oh, shut up.
133
00:06:07,358 --> 00:06:10,492
Nobody has that many
questions about cheese.
134
00:06:12,797 --> 00:06:14,631
(over ear-buds): ♪ Sunshine, lollipops ♪
135
00:06:14,633 --> 00:06:17,533
♪ And rainbows, everything
that's wonderful ♪
136
00:06:17,535 --> 00:06:19,636
♪ Is what I feel when ♪
137
00:06:19,638 --> 00:06:22,405
♪ We're together,
brighter than a lucky... ♪
138
00:06:23,814 --> 00:06:25,480
You need some help with that?
139
00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:28,442
You need a mascara wand in your eye?
140
00:06:37,092 --> 00:06:38,925
(doorbell rings)
141
00:06:39,473 --> 00:06:40,890
Oh, man.
142
00:06:40,892 --> 00:06:42,392
- There you are.
- Hi.
143
00:06:42,394 --> 00:06:44,394
I was so worried about you.
144
00:06:44,396 --> 00:06:46,996
I mean, I was texting you
for, like, three hours.
145
00:06:46,998 --> 00:06:49,232
- Yeah. Sorry about that.
- That's okay.
146
00:06:49,234 --> 00:06:51,234
Phone died, took a bus, let's get it on.
147
00:06:51,236 --> 00:06:52,669
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
148
00:06:52,671 --> 00:06:55,238
- Why were you on a bus?
- Ah, car died.
149
00:06:55,240 --> 00:06:57,807
Didn't change the oil. Let's get it on.
150
00:06:57,809 --> 00:06:59,242
Oh, wait, wait. Hold on.
151
00:06:59,244 --> 00:07:01,493
Y-You took a bus all
the way down from Napa?
152
00:07:01,518 --> 00:07:04,213
And a train and another bus.
153
00:07:04,215 --> 00:07:06,716
- Why are your pants still on?
- Okay, I'm taking my pants off.
154
00:07:06,718 --> 00:07:08,384
Taking them off. But hey, but, uh,
155
00:07:08,386 --> 00:07:10,126
tomorrow we are getting you a car.
156
00:07:10,151 --> 00:07:12,704
- I can't afford a car.
- Well, mm...
157
00:07:12,729 --> 00:07:15,219
Well, that's why I said “we”.
I'll lend you the money.
158
00:07:15,244 --> 00:07:17,063
No, no, no. I appreciate it,
159
00:07:17,088 --> 00:07:19,739
but we're still at the “coffee
and fluffy robe” stage.
160
00:07:19,764 --> 00:07:21,397
- Let's not ruin it.
- No, no, no.
161
00:07:21,399 --> 00:07:24,178
- I know you're good for it.
- Uh, no, I'm not.
162
00:07:24,602 --> 00:07:27,136
- Ah. Cute underwear.
- Uh, thanks. Mm.
163
00:07:27,138 --> 00:07:30,266
They're my “I got me a
new girlfriend” underwear.
164
00:07:30,606 --> 00:07:32,038
Mm-hmm.
165
00:07:37,440 --> 00:07:38,439
What's the matter?
166
00:07:38,981 --> 00:07:41,153
Something sticky in your hair.
167
00:07:41,931 --> 00:07:44,432
Oh, God, that could be anything.
168
00:07:46,691 --> 00:07:49,504
I'm getting worried about
Christy missing meetings.
169
00:07:49,529 --> 00:07:51,829
Ooh. Was I supposed to pick her up?
170
00:07:52,295 --> 00:07:53,961
Oh, well.
171
00:07:56,754 --> 00:07:58,334
Maybe we could take up a collection
172
00:07:58,336 --> 00:07:59,583
and buy her a new car.
173
00:07:59,608 --> 00:08:01,520
Adam offered to float
her a down payment,
174
00:08:01,545 --> 00:08:03,708
but I said, “Never lend
money to a Plunkett.”
175
00:08:03,733 --> 00:08:06,600
They should actually put that on money.
176
00:08:06,799 --> 00:08:08,766
Riding the bus isn't so bad.
177
00:08:09,233 --> 00:08:10,799
Except for that one time
178
00:08:10,824 --> 00:08:12,949
a guy leaned his head
on my shoulder and died.
179
00:08:18,770 --> 00:08:21,624
There was a time I loved taking the bus.
180
00:08:21,626 --> 00:08:23,726
I used to strike up a conversation
181
00:08:23,728 --> 00:08:25,590
with whoever sat down next to me.
182
00:08:25,615 --> 00:08:27,181
Of course you did.
183
00:08:31,536 --> 00:08:34,070
MAN: Hey, lady. You can't sleep here.
184
00:08:34,072 --> 00:08:35,538
What?
185
00:08:35,540 --> 00:08:36,906
What's going on?
186
00:08:36,908 --> 00:08:38,341
End of the line.
187
00:08:38,343 --> 00:08:39,353
Where am I?
188
00:08:39,378 --> 00:08:40,735
Stockton.
189
00:08:41,518 --> 00:08:42,985
Stockton?
190
00:08:43,870 --> 00:08:46,157
Where the hell is Stockton?
191
00:08:51,017 --> 00:08:53,317
Thank you so much for picking me up.
192
00:08:53,603 --> 00:08:55,286
I know it was a long drive.
193
00:08:55,288 --> 00:08:57,032
Yeah, two hours.
194
00:08:58,821 --> 00:09:01,665
Gonna be two hours back, too, so...
195
00:09:02,036 --> 00:09:04,720
that's a total of four hours.
196
00:09:05,561 --> 00:09:07,406
I am so sorry.
197
00:09:08,214 --> 00:09:11,635
- Cheesy peanut butter cracker?
- Uh, sure.
198
00:09:12,118 --> 00:09:13,884
Vending machine dinner?
199
00:09:13,909 --> 00:09:17,110
I wish. I found 'em on an empty seat.
200
00:09:18,913 --> 00:09:20,413
Open or closed?
201
00:09:20,635 --> 00:09:23,235
Closed. I'm not an animal.
202
00:09:27,163 --> 00:09:28,686
It's probably not my place,
203
00:09:28,688 --> 00:09:30,906
and I don't mean to offend you, but...
204
00:09:31,672 --> 00:09:33,358
I've been thinking, how 'bout I loan you
205
00:09:33,383 --> 00:09:34,835
some money for a down payment on a car?
206
00:09:34,860 --> 00:09:37,202
Great. Is there a
dealership open right now?
207
00:09:38,484 --> 00:09:41,638
Whoa. I had a whole thing
prepared to talk you into it.
208
00:09:41,640 --> 00:09:43,640
Well, waking up in Stockton
209
00:09:43,642 --> 00:09:45,163
smacked the pride right out of me.
210
00:09:46,827 --> 00:09:48,866
But we have to keep it on the DL,
211
00:09:48,891 --> 00:09:50,671
because Patrick offered
me a loan, and I said no.
212
00:09:50,696 --> 00:09:52,460
Yeah, let's keep it
away from your mom, too.
213
00:09:52,485 --> 00:09:53,851
She shot me down when I brought this up
214
00:09:53,876 --> 00:09:55,042
a couple of weeks ago.
215
00:09:55,067 --> 00:09:57,140
What? Why'd she shut you down?
216
00:09:57,165 --> 00:09:58,757
She said it was a bad idea to loan money
217
00:09:58,782 --> 00:10:00,187
to anyone in your family.
218
00:10:00,212 --> 00:10:01,288
Oh, she's right.
219
00:10:01,313 --> 00:10:02,366
What you're doing is stupid,
220
00:10:02,391 --> 00:10:04,591
and two grand should get it done.
221
00:10:08,330 --> 00:10:11,898
The kick is up... oh, and it's good!
222
00:10:11,900 --> 00:10:13,867
(imitating crowd cheering)
223
00:10:16,271 --> 00:10:17,570
Hey, Baxter?
224
00:10:17,768 --> 00:10:20,124
Oh, God, what did I do?
225
00:10:20,991 --> 00:10:22,976
Nothing. I want to buy a car.
226
00:10:22,978 --> 00:10:25,445
Can you just tell me why you're
mad and skip the mind games?
227
00:10:25,913 --> 00:10:29,382
I'm not here as your ex. I
really do want to buy a car.
228
00:10:29,734 --> 00:10:31,359
You know, they cost money.
229
00:10:32,335 --> 00:10:33,853
And I have some.
230
00:10:33,855 --> 00:10:35,835
Well, then, come right in!
231
00:10:36,024 --> 00:10:38,091
Can I get you a
complimentary cappuccino?
232
00:10:38,093 --> 00:10:39,959
Hot chocolate? Chicken soup?
233
00:10:39,961 --> 00:10:43,229
They all come out of the
same machine; it's a miracle.
234
00:10:45,100 --> 00:10:47,067
Just the car, thanks.
235
00:10:47,069 --> 00:10:50,503
I want a new one with
buttons and seat heaters
236
00:10:50,505 --> 00:10:52,205
and a working turn signal.
237
00:10:52,207 --> 00:10:55,075
But it still has to be really
cheap, so I need a deal.
238
00:10:55,077 --> 00:10:56,609
Where'd you get the money?
239
00:10:57,746 --> 00:10:58,945
Oh, God.
240
00:10:59,064 --> 00:11:00,730
Christy, are you gambling again?
241
00:11:02,818 --> 00:11:05,934
And if so, who do you like
tonight, Sharks or Calgary?
242
00:11:06,450 --> 00:11:09,222
I'm not gambling, and
only idiots bet on hockey.
243
00:11:09,224 --> 00:11:12,473
Well, WNBA season
doesn't start for a while.
244
00:11:14,739 --> 00:11:17,464
Oh. I know what's happening here.
245
00:11:17,466 --> 00:11:20,387
Your new little boyfriend
is underwriting this dream.
246
00:11:20,635 --> 00:11:22,302
Hey, that's offensive.
247
00:11:22,304 --> 00:11:24,343
I got the money from my mom's boyfriend.
248
00:11:26,708 --> 00:11:28,866
My new guy offered, and I said no.
249
00:11:29,616 --> 00:11:31,945
That is nothing to be proud of.
250
00:11:31,947 --> 00:11:33,585
Be like me.
251
00:11:33,915 --> 00:11:36,916
Find someone rich that you
don't hate, and kick back.
252
00:11:36,918 --> 00:11:39,596
You're still cute enough
to nab a sugar daddy.
253
00:11:40,302 --> 00:11:42,222
I should have gone to Nissan.
254
00:11:42,224 --> 00:11:45,528
Yeah, those are great cars.
255
00:11:47,462 --> 00:11:49,829
Face it, you and me, we're arm candy.
256
00:11:50,028 --> 00:11:51,831
Got to use it before you lose it.
257
00:11:52,325 --> 00:11:54,567
So you're saying I should
drain everything I can
258
00:11:54,569 --> 00:11:57,137
out of my boyfriend
before I become an old hag?
259
00:11:57,811 --> 00:11:59,530
Ticktock.
260
00:12:04,499 --> 00:12:06,613
I always heard about
this new-car smell.
261
00:12:06,615 --> 00:12:08,414
(chuckles) I never knew it was real.
262
00:12:08,416 --> 00:12:10,450
- Can you smell it?
- I can.
263
00:12:10,452 --> 00:12:13,030
- And?
- Uh, definite upgrade.
264
00:12:13,910 --> 00:12:16,370
Yeah, I just couldn't
get that wet-dog smell
265
00:12:16,395 --> 00:12:17,490
out of my old car.
266
00:12:17,492 --> 00:12:18,725
Oh, yeah, you had a dog?
267
00:12:18,727 --> 00:12:21,261
Nope. Therein lies the mystery.
268
00:12:21,263 --> 00:12:23,863
- Ooh, ooh, check this out.
- (horn honks)
269
00:12:23,865 --> 00:12:26,399
(laughs) I don't have
to roll down the window
270
00:12:26,401 --> 00:12:28,101
and yell “honk honk” anymore.
271
00:12:28,103 --> 00:12:29,302
(chuckles) That's great, babe.
272
00:12:29,304 --> 00:12:30,537
Where'd you get the money?
273
00:12:30,539 --> 00:12:32,772
My ex-husband sells cars,
274
00:12:32,774 --> 00:12:34,736
and he also loaned me the down payment.
275
00:12:34,761 --> 00:12:36,943
Ooh, check this out. Satellite radio.
276
00:12:36,945 --> 00:12:39,179
Do you want to hear the
Canadian comedy channel?
277
00:12:39,181 --> 00:12:42,415
H-Hold on. So, uh, you
wouldn't take money from me,
278
00:12:42,417 --> 00:12:44,717
but you took it from your ex-husband?
279
00:12:45,484 --> 00:12:47,219
Yeah, because that relationship's
280
00:12:47,244 --> 00:12:48,888
already burned down.
281
00:12:48,890 --> 00:12:52,692
Has it? I mean, what's this
guy doing loaning you money?
282
00:12:53,150 --> 00:12:55,495
- He's just a good guy.
- Well, I'm a good guy,
283
00:12:55,497 --> 00:12:58,416
but I don't write my ex
any checks I don't have to.
284
00:12:59,134 --> 00:13:01,768
So, does he want to get
back together with you?
285
00:13:02,009 --> 00:13:03,647
Oh, God, no.
286
00:13:03,932 --> 00:13:06,739
Trust me, we tried a couple
times; it did not work out.
287
00:13:06,741 --> 00:13:09,008
- A couple of times?
- Not recently.
288
00:13:09,010 --> 00:13:12,135
- Ah. Well, when?
- Not since he got engaged.
289
00:13:12,424 --> 00:13:15,135
Wait, not since he got married.
290
00:13:15,768 --> 00:13:18,815
You know, this story's
not getting better.
291
00:13:19,815 --> 00:13:21,421
Okay, look,
292
00:13:21,423 --> 00:13:23,122
I promised I wouldn't say anything,
293
00:13:23,124 --> 00:13:25,158
but I got the money from your brother.
294
00:13:25,846 --> 00:13:27,026
What?
295
00:13:27,737 --> 00:13:30,230
Let's not make it a thing, okay?
296
00:13:30,513 --> 00:13:34,181
Yeah. (scoffs) Of course not.
297
00:13:35,604 --> 00:13:38,104
(TV playing quietly)
298
00:13:38,106 --> 00:13:41,608
Where do you get off
loaning my girlfriend money?
299
00:13:41,610 --> 00:13:43,209
You did what?!
300
00:13:43,211 --> 00:13:46,045
- I thought it wasn't a thing!
- Nice job keeping a secret!
301
00:13:46,047 --> 00:13:48,181
I had to tell him; he thought
I was sleeping with my ex.
302
00:13:48,183 --> 00:13:49,682
You're sleeping with Baxter again?
303
00:13:49,684 --> 00:13:50,947
No!
304
00:13:51,848 --> 00:13:53,509
No!
305
00:13:54,838 --> 00:13:56,547
All right, we're cleaning this up.
306
00:13:56,572 --> 00:13:58,397
How much did you loan her?
'Cause I'm giving it back
307
00:13:58,399 --> 00:14:00,173
to you right now with interest.
308
00:14:00,198 --> 00:14:02,751
- No, do not take his money.
- Oh, I'm not taking his money.
309
00:14:02,776 --> 00:14:05,642
- Well, somebody's taking my money.
- We could use a new fridge.
310
00:14:07,298 --> 00:14:10,158
Consider it done. Blank
check, there you go.
311
00:14:11,445 --> 00:14:12,811
You lend my girlfriend money,
312
00:14:12,813 --> 00:14:14,379
I lend your girlfriend money.
313
00:14:14,381 --> 00:14:15,614
How's that feel?
314
00:14:15,616 --> 00:14:18,158
Great. Finally my beer will be cold.
315
00:14:19,251 --> 00:14:21,964
Patrick, you cannot
give money to my mom.
316
00:14:21,989 --> 00:14:23,533
Especially a blank check.
317
00:14:23,619 --> 00:14:27,059
She'll have a black wig and
new fingerprints by sundown.
318
00:14:28,401 --> 00:14:30,201
Look, your woman had
a problem, I solved it.
319
00:14:30,226 --> 00:14:31,359
Don't get all threatened.
320
00:14:31,487 --> 00:14:33,353
- His woman?
- Screw you.
321
00:14:33,567 --> 00:14:34,766
Screw you!
322
00:14:34,768 --> 00:14:36,668
Screw both of you!
323
00:14:37,134 --> 00:14:39,638
Excuse... excuse me. I think
I need to sit down for a minute.
324
00:14:39,640 --> 00:14:41,275
- You okay?
- Yeah, it's just everybody's fighting,
325
00:14:41,300 --> 00:14:42,877
and nobody's mad at me.
326
00:14:42,902 --> 00:14:44,967
I-I don't know what I'm supposed to do.
327
00:14:51,806 --> 00:14:54,470
- Hey, Baxter.
- Hey.
328
00:14:54,495 --> 00:14:57,416
- Sorry to interrupt your lunch.
- Don't be.
329
00:14:57,441 --> 00:14:59,491
Candace made me a kale and salmon wrap.
330
00:14:59,493 --> 00:15:01,793
She fooled me 'cause it
looked like a burrito.
331
00:15:04,108 --> 00:15:06,075
Thanks for taking the car back.
332
00:15:06,100 --> 00:15:08,033
I only put ten miles on it,
333
00:15:08,035 --> 00:15:10,556
but they were the happiest
ten miles of my life.
334
00:15:10,976 --> 00:15:14,408
Ugh. Good-bye, sweet silver sedan.
335
00:15:16,508 --> 00:15:18,007
Take it.
336
00:15:18,481 --> 00:15:19,914
Rip the Band-Aid off.
337
00:15:20,541 --> 00:15:22,914
Christy, I'm not taking the car back.
338
00:15:23,330 --> 00:15:24,916
Unbelievable.
339
00:15:25,097 --> 00:15:26,897
You promised.
340
00:15:27,921 --> 00:15:30,489
You are the most selfish,
341
00:15:30,491 --> 00:15:31,990
unreliable person I've ever met,
342
00:15:31,992 --> 00:15:33,225
and that includes my mother.
343
00:15:33,227 --> 00:15:34,993
And why the hell are you smiling?!
344
00:15:34,995 --> 00:15:37,561
'Cause you're gonna feel
so terrible in a second.
345
00:15:38,070 --> 00:15:39,637
What does that mean?
346
00:15:44,204 --> 00:15:46,100
I'm buying you the car.
347
00:15:47,123 --> 00:15:48,473
What?
348
00:15:48,475 --> 00:15:51,643
Look, we always focus on
the bad stuff you did to me,
349
00:15:51,645 --> 00:15:54,022
but I did a lot of bad things to you.
350
00:15:55,350 --> 00:15:57,816
I would disappear for days on end,
351
00:15:57,818 --> 00:16:00,669
I smoked your weed, I
slept with your friends.
352
00:16:00,694 --> 00:16:02,860
Friends? I thought it was one.
353
00:16:03,622 --> 00:16:06,012
One friend six times,
six friends one time.
354
00:16:06,037 --> 00:16:07,176
The point is...
355
00:16:09,688 --> 00:16:12,341
over the years, I've watched you
356
00:16:12,366 --> 00:16:14,700
make up for all the
bad stuff you did wrong,
357
00:16:14,702 --> 00:16:17,369
and I found it really inspiring.
358
00:16:18,383 --> 00:16:22,367
So, this is me making
an amendment to you.
359
00:16:22,910 --> 00:16:24,500
It's actually called an “amends.”
360
00:16:24,525 --> 00:16:27,555
Dude, I'm giving you a
free car. Get off my ass.
361
00:16:28,207 --> 00:16:30,607
You're right. I'm sorry.
362
00:16:30,930 --> 00:16:32,851
But isn't Candace going to be upset
363
00:16:32,853 --> 00:16:34,453
about you spending money on me?
364
00:16:34,455 --> 00:16:35,985
Eh, she'll never know.
365
00:16:36,223 --> 00:16:38,657
I had a secret
start-a-new-life fund,
366
00:16:38,659 --> 00:16:40,993
but then I realized, who am I kidding?
367
00:16:41,220 --> 00:16:43,547
Money's turned me into a house cat.
368
00:16:45,399 --> 00:16:47,733
Thank you, Baxter. Oh...
369
00:16:47,735 --> 00:16:49,668
Oh.
370
00:16:49,670 --> 00:16:50,869
Wait.
371
00:16:51,149 --> 00:16:52,371
You're not doing this
372
00:16:52,373 --> 00:16:54,373
so you can sleep with me, are you?
373
00:16:54,751 --> 00:16:57,733
Christy, I'm married.
374
00:16:57,758 --> 00:16:59,952
So only if you insist.
375
00:17:01,215 --> 00:17:04,716
- I'm good.
- Cool, cool.
376
00:17:08,062 --> 00:17:10,616
You know, Baxter was
kind of a dick to me, too.
377
00:17:10,641 --> 00:17:12,202
You think I can get a car?
378
00:17:13,163 --> 00:17:15,163
Maybe you can get an oil change,
379
00:17:15,188 --> 00:17:19,655
like the one I'm getting
in, uh, 2,981 miles.
380
00:17:19,974 --> 00:17:22,671
- (chuckles)
- Whoa, whoa. A granola bar?
381
00:17:22,696 --> 00:17:25,069
Why don't you just saw
a piece of wood in here?
382
00:17:25,624 --> 00:17:29,890
So I guess it's a no on
this incredibly ripe peach?
383
00:17:31,831 --> 00:17:34,226
How are you gonna tell
Patrick about the car?
384
00:17:34,251 --> 00:17:37,741
Mm. I ran him by the
dealership to meet Baxter,
385
00:17:37,766 --> 00:17:40,187
who was hiding from his
boss in a large tire.
386
00:17:40,323 --> 00:17:41,823
Patrick's no longer threatened.
387
00:17:41,911 --> 00:17:43,944
Well played. (chuckles)
388
00:17:45,219 --> 00:17:46,751
Son of a bitch!
389
00:17:46,776 --> 00:17:48,543
Can I eat my peach now?
390
00:17:49,481 --> 00:17:53,460
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --
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