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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:37,871 --> 00:00:42,871 Subtitles by explosiveskull 2 00:00:45,828 --> 00:00:49,096 ♪ My name is Hutch and I got Something on my mind ♪ 3 00:00:49,098 --> 00:00:50,630 ♪ Baby Jill ♪ 4 00:00:50,632 --> 00:00:52,566 ♪ You probably get this All the time ♪ 5 00:00:52,568 --> 00:00:55,668 ♪ Cats steppin' to you Spittin' you a corny line ♪ 6 00:00:55,670 --> 00:00:58,771 ♪ So I thought I'd put My feelings for you In a rhyme ♪ 7 00:00:58,773 --> 00:01:02,044 ♪ It's pretty easy for me 'Cause you're so fine ♪ 8 00:01:05,147 --> 00:01:07,648 ♪ Check out Myspace Or Friendster If you need to vet me ♪ 9 00:01:07,650 --> 00:01:11,651 ♪ Be my girl and life for us Will be sweeter than Pepsi ♪ 10 00:01:11,653 --> 00:01:13,489 ♪ And not diet either ♪ 11 00:01:14,623 --> 00:01:16,192 So, what do you think? 12 00:01:24,499 --> 00:01:27,500 Damn, Kelly, you're so special. 13 00:01:27,502 --> 00:01:30,270 I think you might be the one. 14 00:01:34,376 --> 00:01:35,809 - Hutch... - Oh! 15 00:01:35,811 --> 00:01:38,378 Mom, private space. 16 00:01:38,380 --> 00:01:40,714 This is my house. Every space is my space. 17 00:01:40,716 --> 00:01:42,752 You live with your mother? 18 00:01:44,820 --> 00:01:47,488 - What'd I tell you about them Beckys? - Ah, her name is Kelly. 19 00:01:47,490 --> 00:01:49,756 Whatever. Do you know what today is, Hutch? 20 00:01:49,758 --> 00:01:51,691 Yes, the day that you crossed the boundary 21 00:01:51,693 --> 00:01:54,527 - by being in here while I'm trying to get busy. - No. 22 00:01:54,529 --> 00:01:57,663 Four years ago you graduated from college, and we had a deal. 23 00:01:57,665 --> 00:02:00,734 The deal was that you would have a job by today or be out of my house. 24 00:02:00,736 --> 00:02:02,535 Ma, I know that, but... 25 00:02:02,537 --> 00:02:04,738 But nothing. You are out of here today. 26 00:02:04,740 --> 00:02:06,874 No more extensions. No more excuses. 27 00:02:06,876 --> 00:02:09,242 Ma, come on. I am the victim here, okay? 28 00:02:09,244 --> 00:02:11,744 - I'm an overeducated millennial that's trying to just... - Here. 29 00:02:11,746 --> 00:02:14,515 That's so you can rinse that bullshit out your mouth. 30 00:02:14,517 --> 00:02:15,849 Ma! 31 00:02:15,851 --> 00:02:17,316 We're done. 32 00:02:17,318 --> 00:02:18,321 Ma! 33 00:02:24,927 --> 00:02:26,460 Mama. 34 00:02:26,462 --> 00:02:28,427 Mama, listen. 35 00:02:28,429 --> 00:02:30,397 Look, I know it's the deadline, all right? 36 00:02:30,399 --> 00:02:32,466 But you gotta give me more time. 37 00:02:32,468 --> 00:02:36,336 You don't want your baby boy out here in the streets just working no regular-ass job. 38 00:02:36,338 --> 00:02:38,372 I'm gonna tell you what I don't want. 39 00:02:38,374 --> 00:02:40,606 Is for my son to keep on embarrassing me. 40 00:02:40,608 --> 00:02:42,609 Mama, how am I embarrassing you? 41 00:02:42,611 --> 00:02:44,711 Did you know when you were in the fifth grade, 42 00:02:44,713 --> 00:02:46,480 Miss Humphries pulled me to the side. 43 00:02:46,482 --> 00:02:48,248 I hope she ain't breathe on you, man, 44 00:02:48,250 --> 00:02:50,284 'cause her mouth was like an asshole with teeth. 45 00:02:50,286 --> 00:02:51,421 Stop it with the jokes! 46 00:02:53,355 --> 00:02:55,556 She said, "Barb, you got a good one. 47 00:02:55,558 --> 00:02:58,691 He's got looks, brains, heart." 48 00:02:58,693 --> 00:03:01,260 Whatever happened to that boy? 49 00:03:01,262 --> 00:03:04,630 He became a man, grew up, you know? 50 00:03:04,632 --> 00:03:06,700 Matter of fact, 51 00:03:06,702 --> 00:03:08,669 just got an interview right now. 52 00:03:08,671 --> 00:03:09,969 I'm about to go crush it. 53 00:03:09,971 --> 00:03:12,806 Pack your shit today, or I will. 54 00:03:12,808 --> 00:03:14,575 Okay. 55 00:03:14,577 --> 00:03:17,579 - I'm not playing with you, Hutch. - You look nice, Mama. 56 00:03:20,482 --> 00:03:22,783 I texted you guys because I have exciting news. 57 00:03:22,785 --> 00:03:24,818 I proposed to Maggie last night. 58 00:03:24,820 --> 00:03:27,553 - She said yes! - Congratulations. 59 00:03:27,555 --> 00:03:29,755 You're getting married, man? That's so damn gay. 60 00:03:29,757 --> 00:03:33,260 Okay, Maggie's a woman, so it's actually the opposite of gay. 61 00:03:33,262 --> 00:03:36,597 Yeah, but you're 26, man. Why you wanna be tied down to one beaver? 62 00:03:36,599 --> 00:03:39,633 Because I'm in love with the woman that's attached to that "beaver." 63 00:03:39,635 --> 00:03:42,502 Gross. Anyway, I got an announcement too. 64 00:03:42,504 --> 00:03:44,671 I'm moving out of my mama's crib. 65 00:03:44,673 --> 00:03:47,641 - That's awesome. - Yeah, 'cause that shit was getting sad, bro. 66 00:03:47,643 --> 00:03:50,413 And I'm moving in with one of y'all, so... 67 00:03:52,314 --> 00:03:53,647 Absolutely not. 68 00:03:53,649 --> 00:03:55,982 Come on, man. We always talked about being roommates. 69 00:03:55,984 --> 00:03:57,551 We said that when we was 13. 70 00:03:57,553 --> 00:03:59,719 I'll pay rent. 71 00:03:59,721 --> 00:04:01,921 Y'all just get me a job at one of your companies. 72 00:04:01,923 --> 00:04:05,359 You work out constantly, and you can't even keep a job as a personal trainer. 73 00:04:05,361 --> 00:04:08,962 That's because they wanted me to wake up at 8:00-freaking-AM, man. 74 00:04:08,964 --> 00:04:10,796 Roosters don't even be up that damn early. 75 00:04:10,798 --> 00:04:13,399 Hey, tough love time, bro. 76 00:04:13,401 --> 00:04:14,904 You're becoming a loser. 77 00:04:17,973 --> 00:04:20,643 Sorry, man. You're on your own. 78 00:04:21,776 --> 00:04:22,878 Y'all for real? 79 00:04:24,613 --> 00:04:26,880 Man, y'all some fucking sellouts, man. 80 00:04:26,882 --> 00:04:30,284 You know what? Don't ask Hutch for shit. How 'bout that? 81 00:04:30,286 --> 00:04:32,255 What could we ever need from you? 82 00:04:34,690 --> 00:04:37,390 - Whatever, man. I don't need this shit. - Hey, Hutch, wait. 83 00:04:37,392 --> 00:04:40,460 We actually do need something. 84 00:04:40,462 --> 00:04:42,828 That's what I thought. 85 00:04:42,830 --> 00:04:46,399 You got a grilled buffalo chicken salad and four vodka sodas. 86 00:04:46,401 --> 00:04:48,835 You owe us $38. 87 00:04:48,837 --> 00:04:52,976 Yeah, well, congratulations... assholes. 88 00:05:02,750 --> 00:05:05,585 Oh! What the hell, Ma? 89 00:05:05,587 --> 00:05:07,087 Uh, uh, uh, back that up. Back that up. 90 00:05:07,089 --> 00:05:08,822 - I need my life back. - Mom, come on. 91 00:05:08,824 --> 00:05:11,825 I can't even have friends over here, especially male friends, 92 00:05:11,827 --> 00:05:13,859 with your grown ass in my house. 93 00:05:13,861 --> 00:05:16,662 You wanna kick me out the house so you can have random saggy-balled mens 94 00:05:16,664 --> 00:05:18,597 running around naked in the crib from MILFme.com? 95 00:05:18,599 --> 00:05:21,034 - Yes! - What am I supposed to do? 96 00:05:21,036 --> 00:05:24,471 That should be your problem, but since your mother knows that you're completely useless, 97 00:05:24,473 --> 00:05:26,440 I have contacted your Uncle Mike, 98 00:05:26,442 --> 00:05:28,008 and he now has a job for you. 99 00:05:28,010 --> 00:05:30,476 Bingo! You've got a job. 100 00:05:30,478 --> 00:05:33,012 - Oh, hell no. - Give me my keys. 101 00:05:33,014 --> 00:05:35,614 Ma, I cannot spend my whole summer with a bunch of "before" pictures. 102 00:05:35,616 --> 00:05:38,051 - I will blow my brains out. - Well, you know where my gun is. 103 00:05:38,053 --> 00:05:39,719 - Give me my keys. - Ma, come on. 104 00:05:39,721 --> 00:05:41,654 Fat is contagious. I can catch it in the skin. 105 00:05:41,656 --> 00:05:44,123 Now you have six weeks to figure out what you're gonna do with your life. 106 00:05:44,125 --> 00:05:46,092 - Keys! - Ma, I had a dope-ass interview today. 107 00:05:46,094 --> 00:05:47,894 Crushed it, crushed it... 108 00:05:47,896 --> 00:05:50,731 Oh, I guess that's why I received a text from your boy Dave saying, 109 00:05:50,733 --> 00:05:55,068 "Tell Hutch he owes me $38 for his food and drinks at happy hour." 110 00:05:55,070 --> 00:05:57,371 Oh, he's such a bitch for that! 111 00:05:57,373 --> 00:05:58,972 - Keys. - Come on, Ma! 112 00:05:58,974 --> 00:06:00,573 Keys. 113 00:06:00,575 --> 00:06:01,643 Mom. 114 00:06:08,015 --> 00:06:09,383 - Ow! - No keys. 115 00:06:09,385 --> 00:06:11,450 Now, you go crush that fitness camp, 116 00:06:11,452 --> 00:06:14,020 or you'll be crushing a homeless shelter. 117 00:06:14,022 --> 00:06:16,722 - You ain't even using "crushing" right. - Go crush yourself! 118 00:06:20,462 --> 00:06:23,462 At Camp Vision, we create a safe environment for your child 119 00:06:23,464 --> 00:06:25,798 while stressing nutrition and exercise. 120 00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:28,969 They'll have too much fun to notice the pounds are flying off. 121 00:06:28,971 --> 00:06:31,871 - Welcome. - Fuck my life, man. 122 00:06:48,589 --> 00:06:49,955 ♪ This road I take ♪ 123 00:06:49,957 --> 00:06:52,125 ♪ Choices to make Adios, I'm ghost ♪ 124 00:06:52,127 --> 00:06:53,293 ♪ C'est la vie Make room ♪ 125 00:06:53,295 --> 00:06:55,561 ♪ Please excuse me Don't get in my way ♪ 126 00:06:55,563 --> 00:06:56,897 ♪ Don't-Don't just stand there Move ♪ 127 00:06:56,899 --> 00:06:58,032 ♪ This road I take ♪ 128 00:06:58,034 --> 00:07:00,166 ♪ Choices to make Adios, I'm ghost ♪ 129 00:07:00,168 --> 00:07:01,801 ♪ C'est la vie Make room ♪ 130 00:07:01,803 --> 00:07:03,803 ♪ Please excuse me Don't get in my way ♪ 131 00:07:03,805 --> 00:07:05,938 ♪ Don't-Don't just stand there Move, move ♪ 132 00:07:05,940 --> 00:07:08,140 ♪ To the max I can't relax I'm doing 100 ♪ 133 00:07:08,142 --> 00:07:10,075 ♪ Movement of the stomach Got me thinking Of the summer ♪ 134 00:07:10,077 --> 00:07:12,111 ♪ To the top Can't drop Can't plummet, can't stop ♪ 135 00:07:12,113 --> 00:07:13,947 ♪ Gonna gun it Trying to get it Got a point ♪ 136 00:07:13,949 --> 00:07:15,918 ♪ Want it like You want to breathe Indeed ♪ 137 00:07:15,920 --> 00:07:18,051 ♪ Get up off them knees Proceed ♪ 138 00:07:18,053 --> 00:07:20,085 ♪ Think it's less on wants More on needs ♪ 139 00:07:20,087 --> 00:07:22,022 ♪ More success to come I must bleed ♪ 140 00:07:25,694 --> 00:07:27,960 ♪ Encore, take a bow Will vow for anyone ♪ 141 00:07:27,962 --> 00:07:30,931 ♪ We're going to show them how Get it down To the simplest minimum ♪ 142 00:07:30,933 --> 00:07:32,802 ♪ Move, move, move ♪ 143 00:07:33,601 --> 00:07:35,971 Fuuuuck. 144 00:07:43,945 --> 00:07:45,712 Come in. 145 00:07:45,714 --> 00:07:47,681 Yo, Uncle Mike, what up? 146 00:07:47,683 --> 00:07:50,049 Hey, look. First off, it's "Big Mike" around here. 147 00:07:50,051 --> 00:07:54,221 I can't have people thinking this is a nepotism hire, as it clearly is. 148 00:07:54,223 --> 00:07:55,654 It's totally merit-based. 149 00:07:55,656 --> 00:07:58,123 You have zero merit on which to base it, okay? 150 00:07:58,125 --> 00:08:00,861 Trust me, I would've said no, but I'm as desperate as you are. 151 00:08:00,863 --> 00:08:03,496 Yeah, shocking. Another crisis for the big man. 152 00:08:03,498 --> 00:08:04,864 Not quite as desperate. 153 00:08:04,866 --> 00:08:06,265 I have lodging. 154 00:08:06,267 --> 00:08:08,734 Ouch, man, damn. 155 00:08:08,736 --> 00:08:10,570 Look, I'm sorry. 156 00:08:10,572 --> 00:08:13,606 Your aunt really left me in a lurch. 157 00:08:13,608 --> 00:08:16,041 Sorry, man. Must be tough when your wife leaves you 158 00:08:16,043 --> 00:08:19,111 for another woman... that you hired. 159 00:08:19,113 --> 00:08:21,046 Couldn't have seen that on her résumé. 160 00:08:21,048 --> 00:08:23,517 Look, I can do this job in my sleep, okay? 161 00:08:23,519 --> 00:08:25,017 But I'm not a marketer. 162 00:08:25,019 --> 00:08:27,219 She used to do all the websites, and the Twitters and stuff. 163 00:08:27,221 --> 00:08:29,556 Now that she's gone, my attendance is shit. 164 00:08:29,558 --> 00:08:32,525 I can't do two people's jobs, Hutch. I'm one person. 165 00:08:32,527 --> 00:08:33,927 What about on a airplane? 166 00:08:33,929 --> 00:08:35,294 Fuck you, I'm one person. 167 00:08:35,296 --> 00:08:36,862 Okay. 168 00:08:36,864 --> 00:08:40,132 I dunno. Maybe I should just burn this place down 169 00:08:40,134 --> 00:08:42,235 and retire off the insurance money or something. 170 00:08:42,237 --> 00:08:44,737 Yo, come on, Uncle Mike, chill. 171 00:08:44,739 --> 00:08:48,040 You got a sponsor or somebody I can call to help you with all this shit you going through? 172 00:08:48,042 --> 00:08:49,211 Hutch... 173 00:08:50,746 --> 00:08:52,645 I need you to listen to me. 174 00:08:52,647 --> 00:08:57,185 I need big results this summer to attract more campers... 175 00:08:58,753 --> 00:09:01,254 or I'm gonna lose this place. 176 00:09:01,256 --> 00:09:03,990 Good. Then you can get a job where you don't have to watch 177 00:09:03,992 --> 00:09:05,858 an elephant parade all goddamn day. 178 00:09:05,860 --> 00:09:08,028 That's a really nice way to say thank you. 179 00:09:08,030 --> 00:09:10,196 - For what? - For giving you a job, asshole. 180 00:09:10,198 --> 00:09:11,831 At a fat camp? Thank you. 181 00:09:11,833 --> 00:09:13,299 "Fitness camp." 182 00:09:13,301 --> 00:09:15,601 All right, man, "fitness camp." 183 00:09:15,603 --> 00:09:17,871 From what your mom tells me, this is your last shot. 184 00:09:17,873 --> 00:09:20,840 Otherwise you're gonna end up in a homeless shelter, 185 00:09:20,842 --> 00:09:23,709 getting raped by a schizophrenic named Tobias 186 00:09:23,711 --> 00:09:27,279 who thinks he's a unicorn and hasn't showered in months. 187 00:09:27,281 --> 00:09:28,715 What? 188 00:09:28,717 --> 00:09:30,686 Look, bottom line is... 189 00:09:32,688 --> 00:09:35,020 you got no place else to go, 190 00:09:35,022 --> 00:09:38,991 and my camp could actually benefit from your fitness acumen. 191 00:09:38,993 --> 00:09:41,093 But I need you to take this job seriously, 192 00:09:41,095 --> 00:09:43,329 'cause unlike your mom, I'm not giving you 20 chances. 193 00:09:43,331 --> 00:09:45,865 My camp, my rules. 194 00:09:45,867 --> 00:09:47,670 My hell. Thank you. 195 00:09:49,805 --> 00:09:50,839 Hey. 196 00:09:52,773 --> 00:09:56,012 You know, you could learn to love this place, if you let yourself. 197 00:09:58,113 --> 00:10:02,852 Actually, try loving anything besides yourself. 198 00:10:20,801 --> 00:10:22,702 You must be Hutch Daley. 199 00:10:22,704 --> 00:10:25,170 I'm Charlie Soto. 200 00:10:25,172 --> 00:10:28,241 Welcome to Camp Vision, California's premier fitness camp. 201 00:10:28,243 --> 00:10:29,909 Fat camp. 202 00:10:29,911 --> 00:10:33,346 I'm your CIT... your counselor-in-training. 203 00:10:33,348 --> 00:10:35,981 Whoa, no, no, no, no, no. Bottom bunk. 204 00:10:35,983 --> 00:10:37,583 Oh, well, counselors usually take the bottom... 205 00:10:37,585 --> 00:10:41,721 I will not sleep a wink if I'm worried about your fat ass crushing me from above. 206 00:10:41,723 --> 00:10:43,656 Oh, oh, oh. You missed orientation. 207 00:10:43,658 --> 00:10:45,357 Um, don't worry though. I'll fill you in. 208 00:10:45,359 --> 00:10:48,260 Just tell me where to be at at what time so I don't get fired. 209 00:10:48,262 --> 00:10:51,097 I don't care about kids or their self-esteem or helping them 210 00:10:51,099 --> 00:10:53,132 under their layers of lard, all right? 211 00:10:53,134 --> 00:10:55,201 Edgy humor. 212 00:10:55,203 --> 00:10:57,703 You're like a young Don Rickles. 213 00:10:57,705 --> 00:11:01,408 - But I promise you're gonna fall in love with all our boys. - No homo, man, damn. 214 00:11:01,410 --> 00:11:04,647 No, I'm heterosexual. Common mistake. 215 00:11:06,381 --> 00:11:08,280 Welcome, campers, 216 00:11:08,282 --> 00:11:10,784 to a healthy, prosperous summer at Camp Vision. 217 00:11:10,786 --> 00:11:13,352 Please tell all your fitness-challenged friends about us 218 00:11:13,354 --> 00:11:15,722 so we can get more paying customers... 219 00:11:15,724 --> 00:11:18,290 I mean, so we can change more lives! 220 00:11:18,292 --> 00:11:21,193 This is the best day of summer. 221 00:11:21,195 --> 00:11:23,228 Just smell that excitement in the air. 222 00:11:23,230 --> 00:11:26,067 I smell trapped fat-fold sweat. 223 00:11:27,134 --> 00:11:29,235 Welcome, camper. 224 00:11:29,237 --> 00:11:32,871 I'm Charlie, this is Hutch. And we're here to help you battle your bulge. 225 00:11:32,873 --> 00:11:35,274 Jamar Hilton Jeffers reporting for camp, sir! 226 00:11:35,276 --> 00:11:37,443 Welcome back. But what are you doing here? 227 00:11:37,445 --> 00:11:39,312 You look incredible. 228 00:11:39,314 --> 00:11:42,115 Please don't patronize me, Charlie. I'm a soft, gross mess. 229 00:11:42,117 --> 00:11:44,951 ♪ Yo, on the East Coast We got the West Coast ♪ 230 00:11:44,953 --> 00:11:47,087 Kyle Danson in the hizzy! 231 00:11:47,089 --> 00:11:49,755 Damn, girl, you fine. 232 00:11:49,757 --> 00:11:53,125 I'll go ahead and get your number so I'll keep you updated with Carl's progress. 233 00:11:53,127 --> 00:11:55,061 It's Kyle. And no. 234 00:11:55,063 --> 00:11:57,066 ♪ Overseas with My bank account ♪ 235 00:11:59,267 --> 00:12:01,170 It says that we have one more camper here. 236 00:12:10,177 --> 00:12:11,112 Come on! 237 00:12:13,849 --> 00:12:17,250 I don't need to lose weight. I'm a fricking stud! 238 00:12:17,252 --> 00:12:19,184 I will not be fat-shamed. 239 00:12:19,186 --> 00:12:22,087 You can all go to hell! 240 00:12:22,089 --> 00:12:24,256 What's the bitch sitch like around here? 241 00:12:24,258 --> 00:12:26,458 'Cause I brought hella rubbers. 242 00:12:26,460 --> 00:12:28,026 What's up, piggies? 243 00:12:28,028 --> 00:12:29,862 Watch out, kids! It's Lone Pine. 244 00:12:32,099 --> 00:12:34,266 Losers! 245 00:12:34,268 --> 00:12:37,002 Hey, Lone Pine, fuck off! 246 00:12:37,004 --> 00:12:39,172 That's okay. 247 00:12:39,174 --> 00:12:40,943 Fuck my life. 248 00:12:47,181 --> 00:12:50,151 All right, gentlemen, let's circle up. 249 00:12:53,488 --> 00:12:56,789 Welcome to our first nightly devotions. 250 00:12:56,791 --> 00:12:58,290 Hutch, can you put your phone away, please? 251 00:12:58,292 --> 00:13:01,827 Why you dressed like that? Got a hot date? 252 00:13:01,829 --> 00:13:04,063 Can we smell your fingers later? 253 00:13:04,065 --> 00:13:06,068 Hutch and I are going to a staff banquet. 254 00:13:07,368 --> 00:13:09,501 And if I did ever third-base a lady, 255 00:13:09,503 --> 00:13:11,837 I would never share her essence. 256 00:13:11,839 --> 00:13:13,438 Let's go around the room. 257 00:13:13,440 --> 00:13:15,942 Say our names, where we're from, 258 00:13:15,944 --> 00:13:18,178 and why we're here at camp and then something fun. 259 00:13:18,180 --> 00:13:20,212 Okay. I'm Charlie. 260 00:13:20,214 --> 00:13:22,816 I'm from sunny San Clemente. 261 00:13:22,818 --> 00:13:26,519 And my favorite band is Nickelback, obviously. 262 00:13:26,521 --> 00:13:28,520 And I'm here at camp to help you guys get fit. 263 00:13:28,522 --> 00:13:31,256 Uh, I'm Andy, from Santa Barbara. 264 00:13:31,258 --> 00:13:33,559 - My doctor made me come... - No homo. 265 00:13:33,561 --> 00:13:36,228 - Hutch, seriously? - His doctor made him come. 266 00:13:36,230 --> 00:13:38,965 Sounds like his MD gave him an HJ. 267 00:13:38,967 --> 00:13:41,067 He didn't. 268 00:13:41,069 --> 00:13:45,538 I've got the chubby trinity: high cholesterol, hypertension, and Type 2 'betes. 269 00:13:45,540 --> 00:13:47,240 Who's next? 270 00:13:47,242 --> 00:13:49,274 Oh, well, I'm Jamar from Riverside. 271 00:13:49,276 --> 00:13:51,410 It was my third summer coming here, 272 00:13:51,412 --> 00:13:55,215 and I won't stop till I've got ripped abs, solid delts and chiseled calves. 273 00:13:55,217 --> 00:13:58,150 My goal is to get fit, play high school ball, 274 00:13:58,152 --> 00:14:01,154 become a marine, then a senator, then president. 275 00:14:01,156 --> 00:14:03,255 Hey, don't send any dick pics, all right? 276 00:14:03,257 --> 00:14:05,625 That shit comes back to haunt you. 277 00:14:05,627 --> 00:14:09,562 I'm Kyle, and I'm here for one reason: 278 00:14:09,564 --> 00:14:13,031 pussy! 279 00:14:13,033 --> 00:14:16,034 A nigga like me is tryin' to get his dick wet up. 280 00:14:16,036 --> 00:14:17,303 Wait, time out. 281 00:14:17,305 --> 00:14:18,404 Rewind! 282 00:14:18,406 --> 00:14:20,073 What did you just say? 283 00:14:20,075 --> 00:14:22,342 I said "a" not "er." One love. 284 00:14:22,344 --> 00:14:26,111 You say that disrespectful shit again, you're gonna get one punch. 285 00:14:26,113 --> 00:14:27,380 My bad, bro. 286 00:14:27,382 --> 00:14:29,448 Anyway, 287 00:14:29,450 --> 00:14:32,952 instead of getting shot down by skinny bitches all summer, 288 00:14:32,954 --> 00:14:36,121 I'm boxing in a more realistic weight class. 289 00:14:36,123 --> 00:14:38,957 I can respect that shit. 290 00:14:43,064 --> 00:14:47,066 Um, I'm Marshall from Lake Elsinore, 291 00:14:47,068 --> 00:14:49,968 and I'm a sexy bitch who's here against my will. 292 00:14:49,970 --> 00:14:53,206 This whole place is a bullshit farm to make us skinny. 293 00:14:53,208 --> 00:14:54,506 For what? 294 00:14:54,508 --> 00:14:56,442 I mean, look at me. I'm great! 295 00:14:56,444 --> 00:14:58,111 Noted. 296 00:14:58,113 --> 00:15:00,049 That just leaves Hutch. 297 00:15:02,150 --> 00:15:05,050 Yo, I'm Hutch. Duh. 298 00:15:05,052 --> 00:15:08,520 From Long Beach. LBC in the muthafuckin' hizzouse. 299 00:15:08,522 --> 00:15:11,256 Great! Bedtime. 300 00:15:11,258 --> 00:15:14,430 A good night's sleep is the first step towards weight loss. 301 00:15:15,530 --> 00:15:17,196 Oh, yeah, 302 00:15:17,198 --> 00:15:19,933 and y'all figure out your beat-off schedules, all right? 303 00:15:19,935 --> 00:15:22,434 'Cause it's real creepy if we get involved. 304 00:15:22,436 --> 00:15:24,002 Uh, bro. 305 00:15:24,004 --> 00:15:26,307 Kyle, what's a beat-off schedule? 306 00:15:27,675 --> 00:15:29,207 Oh, got it. 307 00:15:29,209 --> 00:15:30,610 Yeah, sure thing. 308 00:15:45,259 --> 00:15:47,327 I told you you should've dressed nicer. 309 00:15:47,329 --> 00:15:50,498 I ain't wasting my sexy on these she-whales. You crazy? 310 00:15:52,032 --> 00:15:54,199 Holy boner parade. 311 00:15:54,201 --> 00:15:56,037 Who is that? 312 00:16:03,445 --> 00:16:05,311 She's a knockout, right? 313 00:16:05,313 --> 00:16:07,246 Beautiful, and she doesn't even know it. 314 00:16:07,248 --> 00:16:08,414 Yo, what's her name? 315 00:16:08,416 --> 00:16:09,716 Candace. 316 00:16:09,718 --> 00:16:13,186 One day I'm gonna work the nerve to ask her out. 317 00:16:13,188 --> 00:16:16,422 Most girls her size wouldn't wear a white dress like that, but she is really working it. 318 00:16:16,424 --> 00:16:18,591 I'm sorry, are your eyes broken, man? 319 00:16:18,593 --> 00:16:20,161 She's not wearing a white dress. 320 00:16:23,198 --> 00:16:26,031 Wait, that's the girl you nervous to ask out? 321 00:16:26,033 --> 00:16:27,733 Yeah, I can't get her to notice me. 322 00:16:27,735 --> 00:16:30,535 Put some bacon in your pocket. Motherfucker is crazy. 323 00:16:30,537 --> 00:16:31,636 That girl, man. 324 00:16:31,638 --> 00:16:33,573 Who is that girl? 325 00:16:33,575 --> 00:16:35,441 Oh, that's, uh... that's Abby Krupa. 326 00:16:35,443 --> 00:16:37,043 Oh. 327 00:16:37,045 --> 00:16:39,345 She's cute too, if you're into that type of thing. 328 00:16:39,347 --> 00:16:41,283 Everybody's into that type of thing. 329 00:16:43,718 --> 00:16:46,785 My job won't stop until it sucks the goddamn soul out of me. 330 00:16:46,787 --> 00:16:48,553 - I know. - 'Sup, girl? 331 00:16:48,555 --> 00:16:51,057 - Hey! - I'm Hutch Daley. 332 00:16:51,059 --> 00:16:53,393 Yeah, I know. I don't know what we did in our past lives 333 00:16:53,395 --> 00:16:55,260 to end up at this blubber farm, 334 00:16:55,262 --> 00:16:57,196 but you are a sight for sore eyes. 335 00:16:57,198 --> 00:16:58,597 All right, everybody. 336 00:16:58,599 --> 00:17:00,732 Does this thing work? 337 00:17:00,734 --> 00:17:04,236 Settle down. There's gonna be plenty of time for socializing, catching up. 338 00:17:04,238 --> 00:17:06,104 Dinner's coming out soon. 339 00:17:06,106 --> 00:17:09,207 And nothing contains peanuts 'cause I can't afford another lawsuit. 340 00:17:09,209 --> 00:17:11,177 Right? 341 00:17:11,179 --> 00:17:12,578 Want a hit? 342 00:17:12,580 --> 00:17:15,180 I want to listen to Big Mike's speech. 343 00:17:15,182 --> 00:17:16,681 This is... 344 00:17:16,683 --> 00:17:19,584 the most important summer in our camp's history. 345 00:17:19,586 --> 00:17:23,488 Well, because this camp is pretty damn close to going broke. 346 00:17:23,490 --> 00:17:27,159 Yo, you ever thought that your hotness 347 00:17:27,161 --> 00:17:29,528 gets in the way of people taking you seriously? 348 00:17:29,530 --> 00:17:33,065 By "I want to listen," I meant "be quiet." 349 00:17:33,067 --> 00:17:35,767 I dig a woman that knows what she wants. 350 00:17:35,769 --> 00:17:37,402 Okay then. 351 00:17:37,404 --> 00:17:40,640 Shut the fuck up so I can listen to my boss's speech. 352 00:17:40,642 --> 00:17:46,278 All right, so, um, new incentive policy! Huh? 353 00:17:46,280 --> 00:17:51,185 The counselor whose campers lose the highest cumulative body fat... 354 00:17:52,453 --> 00:17:54,219 gets a $5,000 bonus! 355 00:17:54,221 --> 00:17:56,755 Before taxes. 356 00:17:56,757 --> 00:18:00,726 If you have any questions, guys, check in with Abby Krupa, 357 00:18:00,728 --> 00:18:04,330 our "AK-47," and reigning queen of weight loss. 358 00:18:04,332 --> 00:18:08,301 She holds the record for 47 pounds lost by one camper. 359 00:18:08,303 --> 00:18:12,205 But, you know, hey, hey. I see some new faces, ya know? 360 00:18:12,207 --> 00:18:14,607 Maybe one of them might challenge the throne, you never know. 361 00:18:14,609 --> 00:18:17,275 Hell yeah. Shit, for five G's. 362 00:18:17,277 --> 00:18:21,746 Boy, I'll put my finger down these kids' throats myself, choke 'em out. Bow-bow! 363 00:18:21,748 --> 00:18:24,717 Bulimia, you know, isn't part of the program, but that's great. 364 00:18:24,719 --> 00:18:27,753 Abby, it looks like you've got some competition on your hands. 365 00:18:27,755 --> 00:18:33,692 Only downside is the bonus was supposed to be the end-of-summer dance money. 366 00:18:33,694 --> 00:18:36,129 So we're gonna be combining the dance with Camp Lone Pine. 367 00:18:36,131 --> 00:18:37,897 Um, it's good to see you guys. 368 00:18:37,899 --> 00:18:39,799 Um, enjoy dinner. 369 00:20:10,792 --> 00:20:13,426 Come on. Let's line up. 370 00:20:13,428 --> 00:20:14,726 Are you eating right now? 371 00:20:14,728 --> 00:20:16,428 We just had breakfast, man. 372 00:20:16,430 --> 00:20:18,397 - Uh, it's a banana, sir. - I know what it is! 373 00:20:20,401 --> 00:20:22,301 Look, that thing's loaded with sugar, guys. 374 00:20:22,303 --> 00:20:24,469 What's the one thing you can eat that has zero calories? 375 00:20:24,471 --> 00:20:26,304 That pink pastry. 376 00:20:26,306 --> 00:20:30,409 - How would a pastry have zero calories? - It means "cooter," vag. 377 00:20:30,411 --> 00:20:32,011 Listen up. Focus. 378 00:20:32,013 --> 00:20:35,814 You guys think y'all have, like, I dunno, a little bit of baby fat? 379 00:20:35,816 --> 00:20:37,350 Yeah? No. 380 00:20:37,352 --> 00:20:40,253 You got grown-man fat on your little baby bodies. 381 00:20:40,255 --> 00:20:43,755 Your lives are gonna suck dead donkey dick if you don't focus up and fix it. 382 00:20:43,757 --> 00:20:45,326 Right now, okay? 383 00:20:50,765 --> 00:20:52,331 Kettle bells. Come on. Let's go. 384 00:20:52,333 --> 00:20:54,899 Ladies, kettle bells. 385 00:20:54,901 --> 00:20:57,637 Just 15 pounds. We start slow and learn to love it. 386 00:20:57,639 --> 00:20:59,639 We still talking about exercise? 387 00:20:59,641 --> 00:21:02,541 No, nothing less than than 40, all right? 388 00:21:02,543 --> 00:21:05,011 This ain't no pussy-ass Pilates class, okay? 389 00:21:05,013 --> 00:21:08,447 We're building man muscle here. Let's go. Come on. 390 00:21:08,449 --> 00:21:09,547 - ♪ Girl, I wanna ♪ - ♪ Do it ♪ 391 00:21:09,549 --> 00:21:10,749 - ♪ Don't you wanna ♪ - ♪ Do it ♪ 392 00:21:10,751 --> 00:21:11,984 You guys suck! 393 00:21:11,986 --> 00:21:12,951 - ♪ Can we ♪ - ♪ Do it ♪ 394 00:21:12,953 --> 00:21:14,019 - ♪ Let's go ♪ - ♪ Do it ♪ 395 00:21:15,922 --> 00:21:17,689 - ♪ You know you wanna ♪ - ♪ Do it ♪ 396 00:21:17,691 --> 00:21:18,990 - ♪ Quit playing, girl ♪ - ♪ Do it ♪ 397 00:21:18,992 --> 00:21:21,459 Good job, ladies. Keep it up. Keep it up! 398 00:21:21,461 --> 00:21:23,862 Man down! Man... 399 00:21:23,864 --> 00:21:25,665 Help me. 400 00:21:28,835 --> 00:21:31,303 Come on! 401 00:21:31,305 --> 00:21:33,538 ♪ D-O I-T D-O I-T ♪ 402 00:21:33,540 --> 00:21:35,640 ♪ This is how we do it When we crash your party ♪ 403 00:21:35,642 --> 00:21:36,742 - ♪ I wanna ♪ - ♪ Do it ♪ 404 00:21:36,744 --> 00:21:39,411 - ♪ Don't you wanna ♪ - ♪ Do it ♪ 405 00:21:39,413 --> 00:21:42,047 You're tired already, man? We've only been out here 20 minutes. 406 00:21:42,049 --> 00:21:44,550 What are you gonna do at the dance when you're trying to get your swerve on? 407 00:21:44,552 --> 00:21:45,985 We won't be swerving anything, man. 408 00:21:45,987 --> 00:21:47,753 It's a joint dance with Lone "Peen." 409 00:21:47,755 --> 00:21:49,955 Aw, come on, you guys are gonna love it. 410 00:21:49,957 --> 00:21:52,425 It's only the most magical night of the summer. 411 00:21:52,427 --> 00:21:54,893 - Hell no! I don't dance. - Why? I'm sure you can dance... 412 00:21:54,895 --> 00:21:56,562 - Oh, is it because I'm black? - Yeah. 413 00:21:56,564 --> 00:21:57,862 Well, I can't dance. 414 00:21:57,864 --> 00:22:00,099 - Hmm. - Did I tell y'all to stop sweating? 415 00:22:00,101 --> 00:22:01,833 Why's it with Lone Pine? 416 00:22:01,835 --> 00:22:04,903 I used to go there. I know what they'll do to us. 417 00:22:04,905 --> 00:22:07,907 - What? - They throw raw pork products at us. 418 00:22:07,909 --> 00:22:10,676 Then you'd better run your porky asses on, man. 419 00:22:10,678 --> 00:22:12,777 Sulking is a shitty calorie burner. 420 00:22:12,779 --> 00:22:14,546 Let's go. Come on! 421 00:22:14,548 --> 00:22:17,082 Come on, ladies, come on. Yes, you can do it! 422 00:22:17,084 --> 00:22:18,516 - ♪ Don't you wanna ♪ - ♪ Do it ♪ 423 00:22:18,518 --> 00:22:20,686 Great job. 424 00:22:20,688 --> 00:22:22,053 - ♪ Let's go ♪ - ♪ Do it ♪ 425 00:22:22,055 --> 00:22:23,089 - ♪ Should we ♪ - ♪ Do it ♪ 426 00:22:23,091 --> 00:22:24,357 ♪ Could we ♪ 427 00:22:24,359 --> 00:22:26,792 Come on. Yes! You can do it. Come on. 428 00:22:26,794 --> 00:22:28,330 Seven... 429 00:22:46,146 --> 00:22:47,612 Y'all pathetic, man. 430 00:22:47,614 --> 00:22:48,948 Seriously. 431 00:22:48,950 --> 00:22:51,550 My grandma could do these workouts, man, 432 00:22:51,552 --> 00:22:53,619 and she's been dead for three years. 433 00:22:53,621 --> 00:22:56,921 Maybe tomorrow we ease up, let their muscles repair? 434 00:22:56,923 --> 00:22:58,090 Hell no, Charlie. 435 00:22:58,092 --> 00:23:00,092 Who cares if we lose weight, man? 436 00:23:00,094 --> 00:23:02,128 I do, Marshall. I need that fucking money. 437 00:23:02,130 --> 00:23:05,163 Dope-ass apartments don't pay for themselves. 438 00:23:05,165 --> 00:23:06,732 What money? 439 00:23:06,734 --> 00:23:09,701 Huh. We get a bonus of a thousand dollars 440 00:23:09,703 --> 00:23:12,604 if y'all lose all that weight by the end of summer. 441 00:23:12,606 --> 00:23:15,107 I don't think we're supposed to be sharing that with them... 442 00:23:15,109 --> 00:23:17,476 If I win that thousand, I'll give each of y'all a hundred bucks. 443 00:23:17,478 --> 00:23:19,111 - I'm listening. - I'm listening too. 444 00:23:19,113 --> 00:23:22,415 - My man. - Bribery? Man, you suck. 445 00:23:22,417 --> 00:23:25,484 You're goddamn right. All right, so let's review strategies, all right? 446 00:23:25,486 --> 00:23:27,085 For meals. What do they consist of? 447 00:23:27,087 --> 00:23:29,121 - Protein and vegetables. - Thank you. 448 00:23:29,123 --> 00:23:31,489 What do we eat if we're craving carbs? 449 00:23:31,491 --> 00:23:33,492 Brown rice and sweet potatoes and pussy. 450 00:23:33,494 --> 00:23:35,660 - You are what you eat. - That's disgusting. 451 00:23:35,662 --> 00:23:37,929 - What do we completely avoid? - Listening to your ass. 452 00:23:37,931 --> 00:23:40,498 - White bread, white rice... - White women? 453 00:23:40,500 --> 00:23:43,134 Ah, I'll put that in the moderation category, brother. 454 00:23:43,136 --> 00:23:44,503 Trust me on that. 455 00:23:44,505 --> 00:23:45,871 Yeah, moderation. 456 00:23:45,873 --> 00:23:47,806 Yeah, you feel me, Kyle. 457 00:23:47,808 --> 00:23:49,742 All right, pigs-in-a-blanket time, baby! 458 00:23:49,744 --> 00:23:51,509 Yes! We finally get a cheat treat. 459 00:23:51,511 --> 00:23:54,045 - I'm starving! - Hell no. You ain't getting no cheat treat. 460 00:23:54,047 --> 00:23:57,615 It's bedtime. Y'all the pigs. Now get in the goddamn blankets! 461 00:23:59,921 --> 00:24:01,920 Ain't no goddamn pancakes. 462 00:24:01,922 --> 00:24:03,724 I need that money. Lights out! Go to bed! 463 00:24:05,959 --> 00:24:09,027 Look, all I'm saying is that it's hard enough whipping these kids into shape. 464 00:24:09,029 --> 00:24:11,130 You can't keep undermining my authority. 465 00:24:11,132 --> 00:24:13,232 I'm in charge here, and that's... 466 00:24:13,234 --> 00:24:15,470 Goddamn. Why'd you hit me like that, man? 467 00:24:16,703 --> 00:24:18,938 Can you help me talk to her? 468 00:24:20,475 --> 00:24:23,042 I think you're beyond help, all right? 469 00:24:23,044 --> 00:24:25,076 Let's just get some liquid courage into you. 470 00:24:25,078 --> 00:24:27,646 Whoa. I'm a CIT. 471 00:24:27,648 --> 00:24:30,815 I'm allowed to go into the Legion, but I'm not allowed to drink. 472 00:24:30,817 --> 00:24:33,087 Oh, party never ends with you, huh? 473 00:24:36,857 --> 00:24:38,592 I don't think so. 474 00:24:43,930 --> 00:24:46,631 So why do they call this the Legion? 475 00:24:46,633 --> 00:24:48,534 It's an American Legion post. 476 00:24:48,536 --> 00:24:50,503 So not only are you catching a buzz, 477 00:24:50,505 --> 00:24:52,103 but you're also supporting the veterans. 478 00:24:52,105 --> 00:24:53,839 Yeah, I'm nothing if not a patriot. 479 00:24:53,841 --> 00:24:56,641 This place is exactly like I imagined it. 480 00:24:56,643 --> 00:25:00,012 It smells like post-adolescent high jinks, and summer romance... 481 00:25:00,014 --> 00:25:02,014 And mildew and colostomy bags. 482 00:25:02,016 --> 00:25:05,083 Why would anyone hang out here? 483 00:25:05,085 --> 00:25:07,018 Oh, well, because they don't card. 484 00:25:07,020 --> 00:25:10,688 Every camp staff within a 20-mile radius comes here. 485 00:25:10,690 --> 00:25:13,825 I swear to God, if you hit me like that again, I will shit on your pillow. 486 00:25:13,827 --> 00:25:15,527 Help me. Help me. Help me. Help me. 487 00:25:15,529 --> 00:25:16,961 - I'm not going to. - Please? 488 00:25:16,963 --> 00:25:17,996 No. 489 00:25:17,998 --> 00:25:20,064 What's up, Hutch? 490 00:25:20,066 --> 00:25:21,800 Since you're a newbie, first round's on me. 491 00:25:21,802 --> 00:25:23,268 - Hmm. - Hey, Candace. 492 00:25:23,270 --> 00:25:25,537 - Hey. - You look amazing. 493 00:25:25,539 --> 00:25:27,038 Thanks, Charlie. 494 00:25:27,040 --> 00:25:28,908 You're finally old enough to come to the Legion, 495 00:25:28,910 --> 00:25:30,743 and pretty soon you can actually drink. 496 00:25:30,745 --> 00:25:32,143 Hello, gorgeous. 497 00:25:32,145 --> 00:25:34,648 I'm gonna leave you guys to whatever the fuck this is. 498 00:25:36,049 --> 00:25:40,585 ♪ Falling out of love again ♪ 499 00:25:40,587 --> 00:25:43,922 ♪ Falling down And lost a friend ♪ 500 00:25:43,924 --> 00:25:45,591 ♪ Time ♪ 501 00:25:45,593 --> 00:25:47,159 'Sup. 502 00:25:47,161 --> 00:25:48,826 Good job today. 503 00:25:48,828 --> 00:25:49,995 Really nailed it. 504 00:25:49,997 --> 00:25:51,996 So you were watching me, like, all day. 505 00:25:51,998 --> 00:25:53,799 Couldn't keep your eyes off a brother, huh? 506 00:25:53,801 --> 00:25:55,333 Oh, that's your takeaway? 507 00:25:55,335 --> 00:25:58,771 Look, this whole back-and-forth, hard-to-get thing is cute, Abby, 508 00:25:58,773 --> 00:26:01,005 but I will get you. 509 00:26:01,007 --> 00:26:02,774 And I will get you hard. 510 00:26:06,279 --> 00:26:09,848 It's like you're doing this really shitty impression of a pickup artist. 511 00:26:09,850 --> 00:26:11,850 What is this whole front you have going on? 512 00:26:11,852 --> 00:26:15,254 I don't front. Hutch keeps it one hunnit. 513 00:26:15,256 --> 00:26:19,324 "Duh, Hutch keeps it 100. Yeah, you can't take your beautiful eyes off me." 514 00:26:19,326 --> 00:26:22,160 No one said beautiful. Your eyes are all right, okay. 515 00:26:22,162 --> 00:26:24,862 Oh, now you're negging me? 516 00:26:24,864 --> 00:26:27,265 Yeah, some of us haven't fully matured. 517 00:26:27,267 --> 00:26:30,069 Matured, all right. Yeah, we can talk about maturity over a drink. 518 00:26:30,071 --> 00:26:31,704 - What you having? - An annoying conversation. 519 00:26:31,706 --> 00:26:33,639 I heard beer. Yo, my man. 520 00:26:33,641 --> 00:26:35,774 Yo, excuse me, old man. 521 00:26:35,776 --> 00:26:37,842 Hey! Yo! 522 00:26:37,844 --> 00:26:41,280 Jimbo. Zip it. Thirsty customer. 523 00:26:41,282 --> 00:26:42,680 Yeah. 524 00:26:42,682 --> 00:26:44,015 Give me a vodka soda and a beer. 525 00:26:45,286 --> 00:26:47,652 Vodka soda and a beer. 526 00:26:47,654 --> 00:26:49,888 Okay. 527 00:26:49,890 --> 00:26:51,623 Jimbo's eyes and ears are going. 528 00:26:51,625 --> 00:26:53,958 They should Old Yeller him, but some people find that inhumane. 529 00:26:55,830 --> 00:26:58,263 - Douglas Alvarez. - Hutch Daley, man. I work at Vision. 530 00:26:58,265 --> 00:27:01,100 - You mean "Camp Virgin," where boners go to die? - Yeah, right. 531 00:27:01,102 --> 00:27:03,168 Shit, they ain't all bad though. 532 00:27:03,170 --> 00:27:05,737 Ooh, careful. That one's a tough nut to crack. 533 00:27:05,739 --> 00:27:08,040 - Oh, yeah? You tried to hit it? - I did hit it. 534 00:27:08,042 --> 00:27:11,877 Took her to a nice dinner, then turned that thing inside out. 535 00:27:11,879 --> 00:27:14,679 Then she ghosted me. 536 00:27:14,681 --> 00:27:16,918 It would hurt, but I respect her game too much. 537 00:27:17,949 --> 00:27:18,353 Feel that. 538 00:27:19,920 --> 00:27:22,053 I'm sure there's other good pussy at Vision. 539 00:27:22,055 --> 00:27:25,858 Big girls work harder in bed. It's how they reward you for slumming it. 540 00:27:25,860 --> 00:27:28,861 - I don't got to worry about that at Lone Pine though. - You work at Lone Pine? 541 00:27:28,863 --> 00:27:31,162 Yes, sir. Nothing but cool bros and down hos. 542 00:27:31,164 --> 00:27:33,734 - Come on. I'll introduce you. - Ah, nah, I gotta take these drinks to... 543 00:27:36,403 --> 00:27:38,269 Ghosted. 544 00:27:38,271 --> 00:27:40,872 - Feel like blazing up? - Oh, my dude. 545 00:27:40,874 --> 00:27:43,307 - Man! - Easy, Daley. 546 00:27:43,309 --> 00:27:45,910 Except for a few junior high circle jerks, I'm a strict vag-eterian. 547 00:27:47,014 --> 00:27:48,350 Circle jerks? 548 00:27:53,054 --> 00:27:55,153 Good morning, campers and staff. 549 00:27:55,155 --> 00:27:57,156 Week one is almost over, 550 00:27:57,158 --> 00:27:59,925 and if you're going through junk food withdrawals, 551 00:27:59,927 --> 00:28:02,197 remember, it gets better. 552 00:28:05,032 --> 00:28:06,864 What are you doing? 553 00:28:06,866 --> 00:28:09,802 Pinch my skin together like this. 554 00:28:10,970 --> 00:28:13,438 Really? 555 00:28:13,440 --> 00:28:15,207 Is that for Sean? 556 00:28:15,209 --> 00:28:16,909 Um, Eric. 557 00:28:16,911 --> 00:28:18,947 I bagged me a Lone Piner. 558 00:28:20,081 --> 00:28:21,179 He sent me this. 559 00:28:21,181 --> 00:28:22,814 What the hell is that? 560 00:28:23,918 --> 00:28:25,450 Rebecca! 561 00:28:25,452 --> 00:28:27,486 I mean, he has a vagina in his armpit, 562 00:28:27,488 --> 00:28:29,822 but other than that he's really hot. 563 00:28:29,824 --> 00:28:33,057 - Mm-hmm. - Maybe I should just stay with Sean. 564 00:28:33,059 --> 00:28:36,861 - Do you think he's out of my league? - No. Absolutely not. 565 00:28:36,863 --> 00:28:39,997 Look, when I was your age, there was this guy who did these stupid raps. 566 00:28:39,999 --> 00:28:42,200 I mean, I was chubby, but he was way overweight. 567 00:28:42,202 --> 00:28:46,338 His rap name was Big Brotha, which was really stupid, but, 568 00:28:46,340 --> 00:28:49,006 you know, I thought it was cute 'cause I liked him. 569 00:28:49,008 --> 00:28:51,176 So I asked him out. You know what he said? 570 00:28:51,178 --> 00:28:52,311 What? 571 00:28:52,313 --> 00:28:55,813 He said he wouldn't date a fat girl. 572 00:28:55,815 --> 00:28:59,418 Don't assume that because you have the same weight issues that makes you compatible. 573 00:28:59,420 --> 00:29:01,486 What kind of guys do you like? 574 00:29:01,488 --> 00:29:04,223 The wrong ones. 575 00:29:04,225 --> 00:29:06,190 Hello, ladies. 576 00:29:06,192 --> 00:29:07,426 ♪ Money, money ♪ 577 00:29:07,428 --> 00:29:08,997 ♪ I just can't get enough ♪ 578 00:29:10,498 --> 00:29:12,831 ♪ Dollar, dollar I just can't get enough ♪ 579 00:29:12,833 --> 00:29:14,967 Come on, Becca. You got this. 580 00:29:14,969 --> 00:29:16,334 - ♪ Brother, brother ♪ - Let's do this. 581 00:29:16,336 --> 00:29:18,771 Come on. Let's do this. 582 00:29:18,773 --> 00:29:21,506 ♪ Just to buy the things That keep you satisfied ♪ 583 00:29:21,508 --> 00:29:23,242 Let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go! 584 00:29:23,244 --> 00:29:24,776 Push! Push! 585 00:29:24,778 --> 00:29:27,181 - Come on. Let's go. Let's go! - Come on. 586 00:29:28,282 --> 00:29:30,082 ♪ Money, money ♪ 587 00:29:30,084 --> 00:29:31,949 ♪ It's all about the money ♪ 588 00:29:33,353 --> 00:29:35,320 ♪ It's all about the money ♪ 589 00:29:35,322 --> 00:29:38,157 ♪ Money, money ♪ 590 00:29:38,159 --> 00:29:40,859 - ♪ I just can't get enough ♪ - Come on. 591 00:29:40,861 --> 00:29:43,829 Man, Hutch, why do we have to wear backpacks full of sand? 592 00:29:43,831 --> 00:29:45,296 Where are we, Guantanamo? 593 00:29:45,298 --> 00:29:47,332 Seriously, Hutch, this is so lame. 594 00:29:47,334 --> 00:29:49,534 This sucks, Hutch. 595 00:29:49,536 --> 00:29:55,073 Running through the woods is for serial killers and runaway slaves. 596 00:29:55,075 --> 00:29:56,941 - Hey! - No offense, Jamar. 597 00:29:56,943 --> 00:29:58,377 I'm neither of those, dick. 598 00:29:58,379 --> 00:30:00,845 Guys! Shut up, stop complaining. 599 00:30:00,847 --> 00:30:03,181 Sweating before a weigh-in is a great thing. 600 00:30:03,183 --> 00:30:07,052 Man, I'm either gonna pass out, shit my pants or both. 601 00:30:07,054 --> 00:30:09,987 Please do both. You do not wanna be awake for the pants-shitting. 602 00:30:09,989 --> 00:30:14,192 Guys, part of camp is finding motivation to do things like this... 603 00:30:14,194 --> 00:30:16,328 Holy shit, a rattlesnake! 604 00:30:16,330 --> 00:30:19,297 Oh, my God. It's a rattlesnake! Everybody, run! 605 00:30:19,299 --> 00:30:21,068 Go, go, go, go! 606 00:30:22,135 --> 00:30:24,303 It's a rattler app. 607 00:30:24,305 --> 00:30:26,371 Yeah, motivation. You know? 608 00:30:26,373 --> 00:30:28,340 See, I knew you weren't that bad of a guy. 609 00:30:28,342 --> 00:30:32,143 Ooh, "Rattler." That sounds like a hook-up app for kindergartners. 610 00:30:32,145 --> 00:30:34,612 Damn! I just made my first million, baby. 611 00:30:34,614 --> 00:30:37,484 Jamar, let's get you up here. Week one. 612 00:30:40,421 --> 00:30:42,053 All right, how we doing this week? 613 00:30:42,055 --> 00:30:43,621 Uh... 614 00:30:43,623 --> 00:30:45,357 - Four pounds. That's how we're doing this week. - Yeah! 615 00:30:45,359 --> 00:30:46,925 Ooh! 616 00:30:46,927 --> 00:30:48,459 When I get that five Gs, 617 00:30:48,461 --> 00:30:51,229 I'm gonna get the most baller of baller-ass apartments, dawg. 618 00:30:51,231 --> 00:30:54,166 Gonna be like, "Yo, does Bill Gates live there?" "Nah, that's Hutch Daley." 619 00:30:54,168 --> 00:30:56,168 - "I shoulda known"... - Can I ask you something? 620 00:30:56,170 --> 00:30:59,237 Eight inches, man, strong. # blessed, you know? 621 00:30:59,239 --> 00:31:02,975 You said that I needed to "step on my game" to get with girls. 622 00:31:02,977 --> 00:31:06,143 - But how do I do that to get with Candace? - Step up your game, man. 623 00:31:06,145 --> 00:31:07,946 Get your slang game together, all right? 624 00:31:07,948 --> 00:31:10,349 Also, look, man, you need to lose some weight. 625 00:31:10,351 --> 00:31:13,084 Don't no girl want to be holding up your stomach while she's sucking your dick. 626 00:31:13,086 --> 00:31:15,219 That's too much work, you know what I mean? 627 00:31:15,221 --> 00:31:17,355 Yo, how much weight we lose? Five percent? 628 00:31:17,357 --> 00:31:19,291 Seven percent? 629 00:31:19,293 --> 00:31:21,426 Holy shit, double digits? 630 00:31:21,428 --> 00:31:23,562 - ♪ I'm a bad motherfucker I'm a bad motherfucker ♪ - Really? 631 00:31:23,564 --> 00:31:26,534 Hutch, you moron, you realize your kids gained a total of six percent? 632 00:31:28,369 --> 00:31:29,304 What? 633 00:31:32,405 --> 00:31:34,672 What the fuck is wrong with you dickwads? 634 00:31:34,674 --> 00:31:36,975 - You should be embarrassed of yourselves. - Hey, no, no. 635 00:31:36,977 --> 00:31:38,476 Hey, don't do that. 636 00:31:38,478 --> 00:31:41,213 Their weight loss is your job. You failed, not them. 637 00:31:41,215 --> 00:31:43,448 All right? I knew I couldn't count on you. 638 00:31:43,450 --> 00:31:45,516 It's like you're incapable of success. 639 00:31:45,518 --> 00:31:47,686 I didn't even want to be here, Big Mike. 640 00:31:47,688 --> 00:31:49,921 Then I'll tell you what. Don't be here, all right? 641 00:31:49,923 --> 00:31:51,992 Enjoy all your other options in life. 642 00:31:55,395 --> 00:31:57,428 You know, I'm never gonna get that bonus, 643 00:31:57,430 --> 00:31:59,197 because you keep gaining weight! 644 00:31:59,199 --> 00:32:01,533 You should be embarrassed of yourselves. 645 00:32:01,535 --> 00:32:02,967 Go back to the cabin. 646 00:32:02,969 --> 00:32:05,003 No, matter of fact, run back to the cabin. 647 00:32:05,005 --> 00:32:07,305 Run your fat asses on. Run, now! 648 00:32:07,307 --> 00:32:09,006 Go! 649 00:32:09,008 --> 00:32:10,612 Everybody, inside, please. 650 00:32:12,478 --> 00:32:15,013 Who the hell do you think you are? 651 00:32:15,015 --> 00:32:17,515 You know what it's like to not have control over your weight. 652 00:32:17,517 --> 00:32:20,384 Yeah, I know. 'Cause I haven't had a sugar or nonalcoholic carb in years. 653 00:32:20,386 --> 00:32:22,387 Good for you! Good for you. 654 00:32:22,389 --> 00:32:25,056 But these kids aren't there yet. 655 00:32:25,058 --> 00:32:28,259 And they don't come here to get berated by some self-hating loathing asshole 656 00:32:28,261 --> 00:32:30,262 who's supposed to be their support system. 657 00:32:30,264 --> 00:32:33,401 I'm their trainer, not their fucking cuddle buddy. 658 00:32:36,370 --> 00:32:39,737 I showed them my workouts, and I went through the diets, and they still gained weight. 659 00:32:39,739 --> 00:32:42,341 I suck at this. I can't even win at fat camp. 660 00:32:42,343 --> 00:32:46,477 - Fitness camp. - What-the-fuck-ever! Who cares? 661 00:32:46,479 --> 00:32:48,679 - Hutch. - What? 662 00:32:48,681 --> 00:32:50,218 Do a sweep. 663 00:33:10,203 --> 00:33:11,371 Move! 664 00:33:13,440 --> 00:33:15,006 This violates their civil rights. 665 00:33:15,008 --> 00:33:17,376 Back of the bus, Rosa. 666 00:33:17,378 --> 00:33:20,114 I got a bonus to earn. Yo, I want some confessions right now. 667 00:33:22,716 --> 00:33:25,249 Speak! 668 00:33:25,251 --> 00:33:28,053 I tea-bagged Marshall, and I posted it on Instagram. 669 00:33:28,055 --> 00:33:29,621 - What? - ¿Qué te pasa, dude? 670 00:33:29,623 --> 00:33:32,224 - Shut up! - Check your face, man. 671 00:33:32,226 --> 00:33:34,325 - Speak! - I... 672 00:33:34,327 --> 00:33:37,094 I stole a pair of panties off the girls' clothesline, 673 00:33:37,096 --> 00:33:39,197 and I've kind of been "using" them. 674 00:33:39,199 --> 00:33:42,034 What the fuck is wrong with y'all? 675 00:33:42,036 --> 00:33:46,604 Yo, I appreciate-slash-am very grossed out by your honesty. 676 00:33:46,606 --> 00:33:48,540 But that's not what I'm talking about, man. 677 00:33:48,542 --> 00:33:50,578 How'd y'all gain weight? 678 00:33:51,344 --> 00:33:52,677 Andy. 679 00:33:52,679 --> 00:33:54,178 Oh, yeah, you look guilty. 680 00:33:54,180 --> 00:33:56,614 Yeah, you hate authority, huh? 681 00:33:56,616 --> 00:33:59,686 Smuggling food would be a great "fuck you" to the Man, wouldn't it? 682 00:34:01,521 --> 00:34:03,487 Y'all made me look like a fool out there, man. 683 00:34:03,489 --> 00:34:05,323 Hutch? Ease up? 684 00:34:05,325 --> 00:34:07,161 Hell no, I don't ever ease up. 685 00:34:09,062 --> 00:34:11,228 You fucking with my money, boy? 686 00:34:11,230 --> 00:34:14,833 You know what they do to niggas on the street when they fuck with my money? 687 00:34:14,835 --> 00:34:17,301 Fine, I did it! I brought a butt-load of snacks! 688 00:34:17,303 --> 00:34:19,170 - Little bitch. - All kinds of shit, man. 689 00:34:19,172 --> 00:34:20,471 Funyuns, Ding Dongs... 690 00:34:20,473 --> 00:34:22,473 Yeah, but we ate it all. So leave us alone, Hutch. 691 00:34:22,475 --> 00:34:24,208 - That's not true! - Show me. 692 00:34:24,210 --> 00:34:27,112 Andy! Man the fuck up, bro! 693 00:34:27,114 --> 00:34:29,815 Come on. You can't let Hutch win! He's an asshole! 694 00:34:29,817 --> 00:34:32,484 Come on! Andy, don't! 695 00:34:32,486 --> 00:34:34,553 - Really? - Yo, what the hell? 696 00:34:34,555 --> 00:34:36,855 Why didn't y'all tell me? Andy, we're here to get fit! 697 00:34:36,857 --> 00:34:39,324 Jamar, you're in good shape. You're not one of us! 698 00:34:39,326 --> 00:34:41,759 You yell at us one more time to "fight through the pain," 699 00:34:41,761 --> 00:34:44,261 - I'm gonna give you some fucking pain to fight through! - I'll beat your ass! 700 00:34:44,263 --> 00:34:46,163 - Yo, stop that shit, man! - Okay! 701 00:34:46,165 --> 00:34:48,199 What are you doing with all this shit? 702 00:34:48,201 --> 00:34:51,136 This shit makes us feel a lot better than you do. 703 00:34:51,138 --> 00:34:52,739 Yeah. 704 00:34:55,709 --> 00:34:58,342 You know what? Fuck it. I'm not even gonna confiscate this. 705 00:34:58,344 --> 00:35:02,313 If y'all wanna grow up and be nobodies and suck the rest of your lives, then fine. 706 00:35:02,315 --> 00:35:04,181 Take some more of this shit. Take some more. 707 00:35:04,183 --> 00:35:05,283 I'm fucking done. 708 00:35:05,285 --> 00:35:06,650 Fuck! 709 00:35:06,652 --> 00:35:08,319 Hutch! 710 00:35:08,321 --> 00:35:10,455 Goddamn it, Andy. You suck! 711 00:35:10,457 --> 00:35:11,491 Yo, what the fuck, man? 712 00:35:25,772 --> 00:35:27,505 What the hell are you doing? 713 00:35:27,507 --> 00:35:30,708 I'm trying to leave, but some rich asshole is blocking me in! 714 00:35:31,879 --> 00:35:33,114 Figures. 715 00:35:34,181 --> 00:35:35,650 What's with the trash bags? 716 00:35:39,785 --> 00:35:42,920 You had a shit weigh-in, Big Mike hurt your feelings. 717 00:35:42,922 --> 00:35:45,390 So now you're taking your little ball and going home. 718 00:35:45,392 --> 00:35:47,158 Great, you're gonna pile on too, huh? 719 00:35:47,160 --> 00:35:49,794 Yeah, I suck as a counselor, okay? 720 00:35:49,796 --> 00:35:51,495 I don't give a shit, all right? 721 00:35:51,497 --> 00:35:54,498 I got a psych degree, man. I can get any job I want. 722 00:35:54,500 --> 00:35:57,902 Ooh, psych degree. How's that working out, huh? 723 00:35:57,904 --> 00:35:59,504 Suck my dick. 724 00:35:59,506 --> 00:36:00,739 I'm kidding. 725 00:36:02,509 --> 00:36:04,676 Look, I'm sorry. I was a psych major too. 726 00:36:04,678 --> 00:36:07,379 That's why I got the first shitty job I could find. 727 00:36:07,381 --> 00:36:09,580 - Yeah? I thought you loved it here. - This isn't my job. 728 00:36:09,582 --> 00:36:12,283 I sell franchise rights to Kwik-E-Marts 729 00:36:12,285 --> 00:36:15,353 and help people make a profit by bringing crap food to the hood. 730 00:36:15,355 --> 00:36:18,757 Oh, cool. So is this what you do to ease your conscience? 731 00:36:18,759 --> 00:36:20,824 - Oh, you do have a psych degree. - Yeah. 732 00:36:20,826 --> 00:36:25,496 No, I bundle up my vacation and sick days to come and help these kids. 733 00:36:25,498 --> 00:36:29,201 It's the only part of the year that I can actually tolerate. 734 00:36:29,203 --> 00:36:31,603 Yeah, well, fuck these kids, okay? 735 00:36:31,605 --> 00:36:34,739 All they do is self-indulge, and they're too lazy and ignorant to better themselves. 736 00:36:34,741 --> 00:36:36,473 Then why are you here? Honestly. 737 00:36:36,475 --> 00:36:39,344 Same as you. 'Cause I'm running away from my dope-ass job. 738 00:36:39,346 --> 00:36:40,545 - Oh. - Yeah. 739 00:36:42,281 --> 00:36:44,583 You do know the meaning of "honest," don't you? 740 00:36:44,585 --> 00:36:46,750 I'm a fitness beast. Big Mike wants me to come in... 741 00:36:46,752 --> 00:36:49,254 You know what? I'm actually gonna google "honest" for you. 742 00:36:49,256 --> 00:36:51,323 Oh, my God, you want honesty? 743 00:36:51,325 --> 00:36:52,489 Yes, I want honesty. 744 00:36:52,491 --> 00:36:53,824 I live with my mom. 745 00:36:53,826 --> 00:36:56,261 And not even anymore, because she kicked me out 746 00:36:56,263 --> 00:36:58,462 because I haven't had a job since I graduated college. 747 00:36:58,464 --> 00:37:00,931 So now I live nowhere. 748 00:37:00,933 --> 00:37:04,636 I live nowhere. My life is in trash bags! 749 00:37:04,638 --> 00:37:06,437 All I do is work out. 750 00:37:06,439 --> 00:37:09,908 It's the only thing I'm good at, and I can't even teach it. 751 00:37:09,910 --> 00:37:11,478 Is that honest enough for you? 752 00:37:15,582 --> 00:37:19,783 God, you are slightly harder to dislike when you're being real. 753 00:37:19,785 --> 00:37:24,556 Right, yeah, 'cause being unemployed and living with your mama, 754 00:37:24,558 --> 00:37:26,861 that's, oh, that's a panty-soaker right there. 755 00:37:28,562 --> 00:37:31,265 No, it'll actually get you further than you think. 756 00:37:36,703 --> 00:37:39,404 You wouldn't have failed if you would have just tried harder. 757 00:37:39,406 --> 00:37:40,538 I did try. 758 00:37:40,540 --> 00:37:43,007 Barking orders and insults isn't trying. 759 00:37:43,009 --> 00:37:45,645 You need to figure out what your campers need. 760 00:37:48,381 --> 00:37:50,951 Yeah. Yeah, you're right. 761 00:37:52,886 --> 00:37:54,388 I usually am. 762 00:37:57,024 --> 00:37:58,556 Good riddance. 763 00:37:58,558 --> 00:38:01,393 Shut up. Hutch is the shit. 764 00:38:01,395 --> 00:38:02,826 No, he's not, Kyle. 765 00:38:02,828 --> 00:38:04,529 Hutch is every bully we've ever met. 766 00:38:04,531 --> 00:38:05,929 Who cares if he's gone? 767 00:38:05,931 --> 00:38:08,299 He didn't give a shit about us. 768 00:38:08,301 --> 00:38:10,669 - I don't know, maybe you're right. - We are right, Kyle. 769 00:38:10,671 --> 00:38:12,707 He has no idea how hard this is. 770 00:38:15,475 --> 00:38:17,442 All right, listen up, chub nuts. 771 00:38:17,444 --> 00:38:18,777 Oh, my fucking Christ. 772 00:38:18,779 --> 00:38:21,712 I am not bailing. Everybody, grab a pen and paper. 773 00:38:21,714 --> 00:38:24,348 - We're gonna do something different tonight. - You got us beers? 774 00:38:24,350 --> 00:38:25,917 Yeah, get a hair on your balls first. 775 00:38:25,919 --> 00:38:27,752 - Oh, I got a hair on my balls. - Yeah? Well, get two. 776 00:38:27,754 --> 00:38:29,824 All right, circle up. Let's do this. 777 00:38:33,093 --> 00:38:34,694 - Hutch, uh... - Nah, I got this. 778 00:38:36,529 --> 00:38:38,897 All right, man, I want everybody to write down 779 00:38:38,899 --> 00:38:40,931 the times they overeat the most, okay? 780 00:38:40,933 --> 00:38:44,469 Be honest with me, but don't put your name on it. 781 00:38:44,471 --> 00:38:47,675 Oh, and don't write any dumb shit like "dinner," or "Thanksgiving." 782 00:38:49,375 --> 00:38:51,576 This isn't a sanctioned activity. 783 00:38:51,578 --> 00:38:53,745 I'm a bad motherfucker, Charlie. 784 00:38:53,747 --> 00:38:55,616 My life is unsanctioned. 785 00:39:02,022 --> 00:39:03,991 There you go. All right. 786 00:39:06,560 --> 00:39:08,728 "When I like a girl that doesn't like me back." 787 00:39:09,696 --> 00:39:11,495 Yeah, I feel that. 788 00:39:11,497 --> 00:39:13,565 That's real. 789 00:39:13,567 --> 00:39:15,400 "When I get picked last for gym class." 790 00:39:15,402 --> 00:39:17,402 That's a good one, yeah. 791 00:39:17,404 --> 00:39:19,440 "When I'm not accepted for being a..." 792 00:39:24,844 --> 00:39:26,444 "When I'm done beating off." 793 00:39:26,446 --> 00:39:28,746 All right now, this never goes away, all right? 794 00:39:28,748 --> 00:39:31,915 Bust a nut, fill your gut. That's how it works. It's science. 795 00:39:31,917 --> 00:39:33,851 Can't argue with that. 796 00:39:33,853 --> 00:39:35,819 Who heard something that applies to them they didn't write? 797 00:39:35,821 --> 00:39:37,557 Raise your hand. 798 00:39:38,892 --> 00:39:40,525 You see? 799 00:39:40,527 --> 00:39:42,159 We all have problems. 800 00:39:42,161 --> 00:39:44,462 We have to figure out what the problem is and fix it. 801 00:39:44,464 --> 00:39:46,830 If you can't fix it... like the jacking off thing... 802 00:39:46,832 --> 00:39:49,000 you just learn to deal with it and forgive yourself. 803 00:39:49,002 --> 00:39:51,502 But you can't eat your way out of your problems. 804 00:39:51,504 --> 00:39:53,638 You just end up being a fatter person with the same problem. 805 00:39:53,640 --> 00:39:55,406 You guys hear me? 806 00:39:55,408 --> 00:39:57,644 But, Hutch, what problems do you have? 807 00:40:02,649 --> 00:40:06,884 Shit, man, with a physique like this, you ain't got problems. 808 00:40:06,886 --> 00:40:09,554 # bodgoals. Y'all figure it out. 809 00:40:09,556 --> 00:40:12,089 All right, so, uh, we gonna get this started, okay? 810 00:40:12,091 --> 00:40:14,958 - Me and Charlie gonna get with y'all one-on-one. - No homo. 811 00:40:14,960 --> 00:40:17,027 Ah, you fuckers got me. All right. 812 00:40:17,029 --> 00:40:18,598 Jamar, you first. Come on. 813 00:40:21,000 --> 00:40:22,766 So, um, 814 00:40:22,768 --> 00:40:26,471 one of the cards said, "When I'm not accepted for being gay." 815 00:40:26,473 --> 00:40:28,973 And I wanted the person who wrote that to know 816 00:40:28,975 --> 00:40:32,544 they can talk to me about it at any time 817 00:40:32,546 --> 00:40:34,946 and that it's okay to be a 'mo. 818 00:40:34,948 --> 00:40:38,750 I get it. All of us have secrets that we don't want to tell people 819 00:40:38,752 --> 00:40:40,984 'cause they might think we're gross or whatever. 820 00:40:40,986 --> 00:40:43,187 I'm not gross. I'm gay. 821 00:40:43,189 --> 00:40:44,721 Oh. 822 00:40:44,723 --> 00:40:46,190 Then why not just come out? 823 00:40:46,192 --> 00:40:48,859 I am out, Hutch. 824 00:40:48,861 --> 00:40:52,730 At home, at school, everywhere. 825 00:40:52,732 --> 00:40:56,100 But as soon as I came here, heard you say that "no homo" stuff 826 00:40:56,102 --> 00:41:00,071 and all that gay stuff, I didn't feel safe. 827 00:41:00,073 --> 00:41:02,707 Andy, listen, man. 828 00:41:02,709 --> 00:41:06,877 Look, 99.9 percent of the stuff that comes out of my mouth 829 00:41:06,879 --> 00:41:08,980 is bullshit. 830 00:41:08,982 --> 00:41:12,083 People's differences, man, that's what makes them interesting. 831 00:41:12,085 --> 00:41:13,853 And it makes for great joke material too. 832 00:41:15,254 --> 00:41:17,154 So you don't hate gay people? 833 00:41:17,156 --> 00:41:20,058 Hell no, man. I kick it with a lesbian all the time. 834 00:41:20,060 --> 00:41:24,062 She's like my best friend. I mean, she's an antisocial, condescending bitch, 835 00:41:24,064 --> 00:41:27,500 but I don't give a damn if she has beaver breath, man. 836 00:41:29,069 --> 00:41:32,837 Look, people are equal. Gay, straight, black, white... 837 00:41:32,839 --> 00:41:34,138 Thin, fat? 838 00:41:34,140 --> 00:41:37,741 Just be yourself, man, and I got your back. 839 00:41:37,743 --> 00:41:39,911 All right? I'll be right behind you. 840 00:41:39,913 --> 00:41:41,048 No homo. 841 00:41:42,681 --> 00:41:43,783 All right, man. 842 00:41:50,223 --> 00:41:51,623 Like that. 843 00:41:51,625 --> 00:41:54,558 Yeah, we talked for hours, man. It was dope. 844 00:41:54,560 --> 00:41:57,594 Like, we really connected, you know? 845 00:41:57,596 --> 00:41:59,663 My boys are easy to connect with. They're little pimps. 846 00:41:59,665 --> 00:42:01,833 One of them was macking this Vision chick, Rebecca. 847 00:42:01,835 --> 00:42:03,868 We call her "Regretta Rebecca." 848 00:42:03,870 --> 00:42:05,069 Huh? 849 00:42:05,071 --> 00:42:06,603 So he doesn't really like her then? 850 00:42:06,605 --> 00:42:09,274 Dude, she's fat. 851 00:42:09,276 --> 00:42:12,109 Take it easy on the booze. It's really fucking your brain chemistry up. 852 00:42:12,111 --> 00:42:14,080 Right, yeah. I'm gonna go pee, man. 853 00:42:15,915 --> 00:42:17,517 Beer, babe. Let's go. 854 00:42:22,288 --> 00:42:25,056 Hutch, there you are. 855 00:42:25,058 --> 00:42:27,190 Yo, back up, dude. 856 00:42:27,192 --> 00:42:29,092 I got my damn tool out, man. 857 00:42:29,094 --> 00:42:32,230 We've been living together this summer. I've seen your privates. 858 00:42:32,232 --> 00:42:34,031 Pretty impressive, by the way. 859 00:42:34,033 --> 00:42:36,868 Do you think you're making this less awkward? What's wrong with you? 860 00:42:36,870 --> 00:42:38,835 I'm making my move on Candace. 861 00:42:38,837 --> 00:42:41,339 How's this shirt? How's my hair? 862 00:42:41,341 --> 00:42:44,308 - How's this for an opening line? - Dude, maintain. Damn! 863 00:42:44,310 --> 00:42:47,078 You are insecure, brother. You need confidence. 864 00:42:47,080 --> 00:42:49,147 Come here. Look in this mirror, man. 865 00:42:49,149 --> 00:42:51,149 You know what I see in this mirror, huh? 866 00:42:51,151 --> 00:42:54,118 A smooth, charming, sexy motherfucker 867 00:42:54,120 --> 00:42:56,219 who's smarter than most people. 868 00:42:56,221 --> 00:42:58,790 Just needs a little break in life, you know? 869 00:42:58,792 --> 00:43:01,225 Thanks, Hutch. I didn't know you felt that way. 870 00:43:01,227 --> 00:43:03,127 Nigga, I'm talking about me. 871 00:43:03,129 --> 00:43:06,263 You are a chubby virgin who can't nut up enough to talk to a fat chick. 872 00:43:06,265 --> 00:43:09,199 - That is you. - Are you trying to improve my confidence? 873 00:43:09,201 --> 00:43:15,073 Look, what I'm saying is you need to look like you, and feel like me, you know? 874 00:43:15,075 --> 00:43:16,741 I'm gonna help you out. 875 00:43:16,743 --> 00:43:18,208 I'm gonna go over there with you, 876 00:43:18,210 --> 00:43:19,978 talk you up to Candace so you're not nervous. 877 00:43:19,980 --> 00:43:22,850 - You mean like a wingman? - Yeah, if this was 2005. 878 00:43:23,984 --> 00:43:25,650 What's wrong with you, Charlie? 879 00:43:25,652 --> 00:43:27,855 Like a friend, man. Like a friend. 880 00:43:32,959 --> 00:43:35,158 Hey, now remember, man, okay? 881 00:43:35,160 --> 00:43:36,861 Confidence. All right? 882 00:43:36,863 --> 00:43:38,732 She's lucky you're hitting on her. Let's go. 883 00:43:40,866 --> 00:43:42,100 - Hey, Candace! - Oooh. 884 00:43:42,102 --> 00:43:44,138 Inside voices, please. 885 00:43:45,372 --> 00:43:47,938 What's up, Hutch? Nice shirt. 886 00:43:47,940 --> 00:43:50,875 Looks like we got front row seats to the gun show. 887 00:43:50,877 --> 00:43:53,243 My man Charlie picked it out for me, man. 888 00:43:53,245 --> 00:43:55,078 He has dope style. 889 00:43:55,080 --> 00:43:58,181 Yeah, um, but you look nice too, Candace. 890 00:43:58,183 --> 00:44:01,051 - Oh. - But not like matronly nice. 891 00:44:01,053 --> 00:44:04,054 Hot. But understated. 892 00:44:04,056 --> 00:44:05,823 Like girlfriend material. 893 00:44:05,825 --> 00:44:08,426 - Have you been drinking, Charlie? - No, I can't. 894 00:44:08,428 --> 00:44:11,297 But I would love to buy you one. Barkeep! 895 00:44:12,399 --> 00:44:14,364 Hello? Barkeep? 896 00:44:14,366 --> 00:44:17,268 I'm, uh... I'm gonna go. 897 00:44:17,270 --> 00:44:19,073 - Barkeep. - Away. 898 00:44:19,973 --> 00:44:21,272 Over there. 899 00:44:21,274 --> 00:44:23,241 Barkeep, beer for milady, please. 900 00:44:23,243 --> 00:44:24,745 Bar-Bar-Barkeep! 901 00:44:26,413 --> 00:44:27,978 Abby again? 902 00:44:27,980 --> 00:44:29,781 No, man. 903 00:44:29,783 --> 00:44:31,415 My guy's spitting game for the first time. 904 00:44:31,417 --> 00:44:32,917 Good luck. 905 00:44:32,919 --> 00:44:34,321 That kid's coochie repellent. 906 00:44:37,122 --> 00:44:39,692 Don't worry, it's okay. I'll just... I'll just get it myself. 907 00:44:41,326 --> 00:44:42,826 - Charlie... What... Jesus. - Aaah. 908 00:44:44,464 --> 00:44:47,031 Charlie, this isn't like some self-service kind of bar. 909 00:44:47,033 --> 00:44:48,935 What the fuck? Jesus... Charlie! 910 00:44:50,203 --> 00:44:52,103 Sorry. Uh, little clumsy. 911 00:44:52,105 --> 00:44:53,937 But this, uh... this drink will help. 912 00:44:55,408 --> 00:44:56,944 He's doing it. 913 00:44:58,143 --> 00:44:59,944 Oh! 914 00:44:59,946 --> 00:45:01,879 I'm so sorry! 915 00:45:01,881 --> 00:45:04,147 - Smooth. - Are you fucking kidding me? 916 00:45:04,149 --> 00:45:06,119 Is this a good time to ask you out or a bad time? 917 00:45:07,453 --> 00:45:09,689 Oh! 918 00:45:14,794 --> 00:45:16,861 Man down. 919 00:45:16,863 --> 00:45:20,297 Hell of a show, Vision. I only regret I got no bacon to throw. 920 00:45:20,299 --> 00:45:23,134 Yo, chill the fuck out, dude. My man just busted his dome. 921 00:45:23,136 --> 00:45:26,737 - No, I'm okay. - Don't tell me you actually like those losers. 922 00:45:26,739 --> 00:45:29,473 They can't all be losers. That's statistically impossible. 923 00:45:29,475 --> 00:45:33,377 They're about to eat themselves to death. What part of that is winning behavior? 924 00:45:33,379 --> 00:45:36,781 You get shit-faced and vape and talk shit about people all day. 925 00:45:36,783 --> 00:45:38,348 What part of that is winning behavior? 926 00:45:38,350 --> 00:45:40,118 All of it. 927 00:45:40,120 --> 00:45:42,219 And you're kinda being a fucking dick hole right now. 928 00:45:42,221 --> 00:45:44,422 So whatever's up your ass, you need to dislodge it. 929 00:45:44,424 --> 00:45:46,089 Maybe you're up my ass. 930 00:45:46,091 --> 00:45:48,326 - No homo. - No homo. No. 931 00:45:48,328 --> 00:45:50,428 You know, I'm gonna stop saying that shit. 932 00:45:50,430 --> 00:45:53,096 'Cause I sound like a snobby judgmental bitch like you. 933 00:45:53,098 --> 00:45:55,333 And you're a dirt-poor chub lover with a bloody nose. 934 00:45:55,335 --> 00:45:58,236 Bloody nose? 935 00:45:58,238 --> 00:46:00,373 - Go back to your fat camp. - Fitness camp, motherfucker. 936 00:46:06,212 --> 00:46:08,411 - Oh, God! - What the hell you doin', man? 937 00:46:08,413 --> 00:46:10,013 I hate violence, 938 00:46:10,015 --> 00:46:12,783 and the pain in my testicles is really reminding me why. 939 00:46:12,785 --> 00:46:14,786 You chose the wrong team, bitch. 940 00:46:14,788 --> 00:46:18,288 I mean, look at your boy. He couldn't even nut up to kick it to a fat chick. 941 00:46:18,290 --> 00:46:19,824 Yeah, he doesn't have experience, 942 00:46:19,826 --> 00:46:21,792 but he's a better man than you'll ever be, 943 00:46:21,794 --> 00:46:24,161 - and he can get any girl he wants. - Unlike you. 944 00:46:24,163 --> 00:46:27,297 You had to keep rubbing one out to Abby all summer long. 945 00:46:27,299 --> 00:46:28,900 Beware of chaffing. 946 00:46:28,902 --> 00:46:30,902 I'd say the same thing about you, Douglas, 947 00:46:30,904 --> 00:46:32,804 but even your own hand must hate fucking you. 948 00:46:32,806 --> 00:46:35,071 Me, Charlie and anybody in my cabin 949 00:46:35,073 --> 00:46:38,241 can beat any of you little bitches in anything. 950 00:46:38,243 --> 00:46:42,346 Oh, we'll see at the dance when my boys are swimming in a sea of snatch. 951 00:46:42,348 --> 00:46:45,949 As a matter of fact, we'll outclass, outdance 952 00:46:45,951 --> 00:46:47,984 - and bag more chicks at that dance than you. - Wait... 953 00:46:47,986 --> 00:46:49,554 Oh. 954 00:46:49,556 --> 00:46:50,855 - What? - What the... 955 00:46:53,359 --> 00:46:55,359 - Oh, it's a bet. - Yeah, it is. 956 00:46:55,361 --> 00:46:57,562 Oh. We'll reinforce the floors for you. 957 00:46:57,564 --> 00:47:00,263 Yeah, I don't know what the fuck that means. 958 00:47:00,265 --> 00:47:02,500 - Later, losers. - I'm sorry. 959 00:47:02,502 --> 00:47:05,538 You guys are betting on whose campers are gonna hook up with more girls? 960 00:47:07,105 --> 00:47:09,373 Am I the only one that has a problem with this? 961 00:47:09,375 --> 00:47:11,509 Man, you guys should've seen it! 962 00:47:11,511 --> 00:47:14,545 Those Lone Piners were making fun of us, but Hutch steps up and he's all, 963 00:47:14,547 --> 00:47:17,214 "Well, my boys can do better than your boys." 964 00:47:17,216 --> 00:47:21,319 And then the other guy's like, "Well, my guys can get more girls than your guys can." 965 00:47:21,321 --> 00:47:24,355 And then Hutch is like, "No, my guys can get more chicks than yours can." 966 00:47:24,357 --> 00:47:26,857 And it's all going down at the dance. 967 00:47:26,859 --> 00:47:28,993 - It was probably the greatest night of my life. - Hutch! 968 00:47:28,995 --> 00:47:32,062 - Why would you do that? - What? I stood up for you turds. 969 00:47:32,064 --> 00:47:34,632 By saying we'd get the most girls at a dance? Seriously? 970 00:47:34,634 --> 00:47:37,000 Yes! Come on, guys. We can do this. 971 00:47:37,002 --> 00:47:39,203 Look, we all got sexy in us, man. 972 00:47:39,205 --> 00:47:42,172 You just gotta unleash it. I can turn y'all into chick magnets in no time. 973 00:47:42,174 --> 00:47:44,908 Matter of fact, I got a three-tier program. 974 00:47:44,910 --> 00:47:47,310 One, teach y'all my swagger. 975 00:47:47,312 --> 00:47:49,946 Two, teach y'all some dope-ass pickup lines. 976 00:47:49,948 --> 00:47:51,949 You'll be able to pick up anybody. 977 00:47:51,951 --> 00:47:55,152 Three, spend three weeks teaching y'all some sick dance moves. 978 00:47:55,154 --> 00:47:58,188 Man, panties will be flying all over the place. 979 00:47:58,190 --> 00:48:00,591 Y'all be hitting that motherfucker just like damn... 980 00:48:00,593 --> 00:48:03,560 That is literally the worst idea I've ever heard in my 14 years. 981 00:48:03,562 --> 00:48:06,397 Wait, guys. This idea could be dope. 982 00:48:06,399 --> 00:48:07,899 See? 983 00:48:07,901 --> 00:48:10,400 Marshall likes it, and he hates me! 984 00:48:10,402 --> 00:48:11,601 Mmm! 985 00:48:11,603 --> 00:48:14,170 Guys, come on. This is a good idea. 986 00:48:14,172 --> 00:48:17,574 You know, to show that we big guys can shake our asses too. 987 00:48:17,576 --> 00:48:19,442 No homo. 988 00:48:19,444 --> 00:48:22,312 Yo, all right. We gonna cut the "no homo" shit out, all right? 989 00:48:22,314 --> 00:48:23,980 What? Why? 990 00:48:23,982 --> 00:48:26,317 Because I'm a "yes homo." 991 00:48:26,319 --> 00:48:29,020 What the fuck? 992 00:48:29,022 --> 00:48:31,422 I'm gay. So what? I like dudes. 993 00:48:31,424 --> 00:48:34,458 - I'm a homosexual. - I knew that as soon as you walked in. 994 00:48:34,460 --> 00:48:36,560 That explains the way you run, you know? 995 00:48:36,562 --> 00:48:40,063 And since that's the case, you gonna have to work extra hard, man. 996 00:48:40,065 --> 00:48:42,299 Because you thought it was hard getting chicks when you're fat? 997 00:48:42,301 --> 00:48:44,502 Shit, you'll be invisible to gay dudes. 998 00:48:44,504 --> 00:48:47,538 - Step it up. - You guys are cool with this? 999 00:48:47,540 --> 00:48:52,243 We have been sleeping and showering with this kid for weeks. 1000 00:48:52,245 --> 00:48:54,411 Kyle, don't be an asshole. 1001 00:48:54,413 --> 00:48:58,015 Yeah, homosexuals have contributed greatly to society. 1002 00:48:58,017 --> 00:49:00,484 Like, the first computer or fashion week. 1003 00:49:00,486 --> 00:49:02,719 I ain't living with a gay dude. 1004 00:49:02,721 --> 00:49:05,355 I mean, if you want, I can help your hating ass pack up. 1005 00:49:05,357 --> 00:49:07,558 Look, Andy likes dudes. 1006 00:49:07,560 --> 00:49:10,127 So more pussy for you. Think about it. 1007 00:49:10,129 --> 00:49:13,096 And if I hear you giving him any more shit, 1008 00:49:13,098 --> 00:49:15,299 me and you are gonna have a problem, you hear me? 1009 00:49:15,301 --> 00:49:19,703 Ooh. 1010 00:49:19,705 --> 00:49:24,174 All right. Now, who's down with this dance plan, huh? 1011 00:49:24,176 --> 00:49:25,111 Your boy. 1012 00:49:27,212 --> 00:49:30,080 Fuck my life. Man, I took a punch for y'all little... 1013 00:49:30,082 --> 00:49:31,384 Come on, guys. Really? 1014 00:49:33,085 --> 00:49:34,154 Don't hit me, man. 1015 00:49:35,421 --> 00:49:37,288 Attention campers and staff. 1016 00:49:37,290 --> 00:49:39,422 Week 3 is officially over. 1017 00:49:39,424 --> 00:49:42,326 You're halfway there. Don't quit now. 1018 00:49:42,328 --> 00:49:44,264 Like my ex-wife did. 1019 00:49:49,368 --> 00:49:52,171 You know, it's pretty ironic we're doing a kitchen raid at a fat camp. 1020 00:49:54,006 --> 00:49:55,541 - Jackpot. - Oh, shit? 1021 00:50:01,413 --> 00:50:03,015 So... 1022 00:50:05,051 --> 00:50:06,353 - One for you. - Thank you. 1023 00:50:07,553 --> 00:50:08,989 The trick is... 1024 00:50:12,290 --> 00:50:15,326 to melt the chocolate on the marshmallow. 1025 00:50:15,328 --> 00:50:17,163 All right. Suck it, Rachael Ray. 1026 00:50:19,399 --> 00:50:21,364 They'll get on board 1027 00:50:21,366 --> 00:50:23,433 with your lady-getting competition, 1028 00:50:23,435 --> 00:50:27,006 which I am turning my feminist brain off for so I can process. 1029 00:50:28,573 --> 00:50:30,042 Mmm. 1030 00:50:31,343 --> 00:50:33,109 Oh, my God, so freaking good. Here. 1031 00:50:33,111 --> 00:50:36,080 Fuck no, thank you. I'm not doing that shit. 1032 00:50:36,082 --> 00:50:39,150 That is too much sugar and carbs in one... 1033 00:50:39,152 --> 00:50:40,717 It's like six sandwiches. Just shit I don't eat. 1034 00:50:40,719 --> 00:50:42,286 - Come on. - Airplane all you want. 1035 00:50:42,288 --> 00:50:44,788 Cookies, sugar, not happening ever, for no one. 1036 00:50:44,790 --> 00:50:48,759 Dude, your body issues put my campers to shame. Okay, where does it come from? 1037 00:50:48,761 --> 00:50:50,661 And don't make me google "honest" again. 1038 00:50:50,663 --> 00:50:53,297 Oh, Google, okay... 1039 00:50:53,299 --> 00:50:58,234 Look, I'm about to tell you something that only Big Mike knows. 1040 00:50:58,236 --> 00:50:59,505 You killed a man? 1041 00:51:00,772 --> 00:51:03,107 - You have diphallia? - What the fuck is that? 1042 00:51:03,109 --> 00:51:04,275 Two penises. 1043 00:51:05,511 --> 00:51:07,243 But... I-I don't know. 1044 00:51:07,245 --> 00:51:09,080 I can't imagine why you'd even say that to Big Mike. 1045 00:51:09,082 --> 00:51:11,248 - No, no. - No? Okay. 1046 00:51:14,219 --> 00:51:16,520 Uh, I used to be fat. 1047 00:51:16,522 --> 00:51:19,457 Like hippo-size. 1048 00:51:19,459 --> 00:51:22,692 I went to camp here, and they used to call me Jabba the Hutch. 1049 00:51:22,694 --> 00:51:24,562 Why are you laughing at me? 1050 00:51:24,564 --> 00:51:27,067 - It is not that funny. - Okay, sorry. I'm sorry. 1051 00:51:28,167 --> 00:51:29,469 It's kinda funny. 1052 00:51:31,203 --> 00:51:34,304 My dad took off, and, um, I started eating my feelings, 1053 00:51:34,306 --> 00:51:37,343 and before I knew it, I was 5'5," 240. 1054 00:51:39,178 --> 00:51:41,444 Well, for what it's worth, I liked that guy. 1055 00:51:41,446 --> 00:51:42,645 Hmm? 1056 00:51:42,647 --> 00:51:44,750 He was funny, charming... 1057 00:51:45,718 --> 00:51:47,417 and a decent rapper. 1058 00:51:47,419 --> 00:51:49,620 How you know I could rhyme? 1059 00:51:49,622 --> 00:51:52,755 ♪ Baby girl, You probably get this All the time ♪ 1060 00:51:52,757 --> 00:51:55,792 ♪ Cats steppin' to you Spittin' you a corny line ♪ 1061 00:51:55,794 --> 00:51:59,129 ♪ So I thought I'd put My feelings for you In a rhyme ♪ 1062 00:51:59,131 --> 00:52:03,134 ♪ It's pretty easy for me ‘Cause you're so fine ♪ 1063 00:52:03,136 --> 00:52:05,236 I just knew that song was for me. 1064 00:52:05,238 --> 00:52:08,241 I practiced my surprised face in the mirror, 1065 00:52:09,575 --> 00:52:11,310 how you'd hug me when you finished. 1066 00:52:12,879 --> 00:52:15,712 ♪ I can make you happy, girl If you let me ♪ 1067 00:52:15,714 --> 00:52:17,547 ♪ Make you feel things so good I know... ♪ 1068 00:52:17,549 --> 00:52:19,917 And then I saw you rapping to Jill Hendricks. 1069 00:52:21,921 --> 00:52:24,690 ♪ Be my girl and life for us Will be sweeter than Pepsi ♪ 1070 00:52:26,158 --> 00:52:27,526 ♪ And not diet either ♪ 1071 00:52:28,794 --> 00:52:30,393 So what do you think? 1072 00:52:33,232 --> 00:52:36,232 I was willing to be Jill's sloppy seconds. 1073 00:52:36,234 --> 00:52:37,536 You still said no. 1074 00:52:40,372 --> 00:52:42,473 That's impossible, man. 1075 00:52:42,475 --> 00:52:44,708 The girl who liked me was, like, Flabby Fupa or something... 1076 00:52:44,710 --> 00:52:46,609 That was my nickname. 1077 00:52:46,611 --> 00:52:48,547 Abby Krupa, Flabby Fupa. 1078 00:52:50,448 --> 00:52:52,518 Fat upper pussy area? 1079 00:52:54,719 --> 00:52:57,487 It was clever, but hurtful. 1080 00:52:57,489 --> 00:53:00,292 Ho-ly shit. 1081 00:53:01,426 --> 00:53:02,926 Why didn't you say anything? 1082 00:53:02,928 --> 00:53:05,529 I almost did. 1083 00:53:05,531 --> 00:53:07,397 But you were being such a douche 1084 00:53:07,399 --> 00:53:10,466 that I couldn't give you the satisfaction. 1085 00:53:10,468 --> 00:53:13,437 And then, you know, it was poetic to watch you drool over me. 1086 00:53:13,439 --> 00:53:15,371 I know. I was a jerk. I get it. 1087 00:53:15,373 --> 00:53:17,641 So, how'd you lose the weight? 1088 00:53:17,643 --> 00:53:21,545 I promised myself if I ever saw my dad again, I would kick his ass. 1089 00:53:21,547 --> 00:53:24,748 So, you know, I got swole getting ready for the day 1090 00:53:24,750 --> 00:53:28,384 and liked the results so much and was so proud of myself that I just... 1091 00:53:28,386 --> 00:53:31,422 - Became a colossal douche canoe. - No, no. 1092 00:53:32,658 --> 00:53:36,460 I just didn't want to be that kid again. 1093 00:53:44,669 --> 00:53:46,703 Aha, you got sugar and carbs in your mouth. 1094 00:53:46,705 --> 00:53:48,408 - Yeah? Oh, yeah? - Mm-hmm. 1095 00:54:00,685 --> 00:54:02,987 Almost there, boys. Couple more seconds. 1096 00:54:02,989 --> 00:54:04,821 - Yes, Charlie. - All right, guys. 1097 00:54:04,823 --> 00:54:06,957 We got a new workout today. It's a hip-hop workout. 1098 00:54:06,959 --> 00:54:10,361 Why does that sound really, really, really, really close to dancing? 1099 00:54:10,363 --> 00:54:12,696 Guys, if we're gonna beat Lone Pine, we have to stick together. 1100 00:54:12,698 --> 00:54:14,598 - That's the only way this can work. - We're not doing that. 1101 00:54:14,600 --> 00:54:17,000 - You have to at least try. - Why? I don't dance. 1102 00:54:17,002 --> 00:54:19,335 - He doesn't even like girls. Get your head checked. - Mm-hmm. 1103 00:54:19,337 --> 00:54:21,404 We're never outscoring Camp Supermodels. 1104 00:54:21,406 --> 00:54:23,607 Seriously, you don't even understand. 1105 00:54:23,609 --> 00:54:25,812 - You've never been fat. - Mm-hmm. 1106 00:54:27,779 --> 00:54:28,978 Yes, I have. 1107 00:54:28,980 --> 00:54:30,513 - Bitch. - You're lying. 1108 00:54:30,515 --> 00:54:32,516 Nice try, but you can't bullshit a bullshitter. 1109 00:54:32,518 --> 00:54:33,687 - No, it's true. - Prove it. 1110 00:54:39,292 --> 00:54:42,058 Yo, okay. I got an idea. Come on. 1111 00:54:42,060 --> 00:54:43,896 - What's he doing now? - I don't know. 1112 00:55:08,921 --> 00:55:10,323 Oh, my golly! 1113 00:55:11,690 --> 00:55:14,591 No shit, Hutch! That's you? 1114 00:55:14,593 --> 00:55:16,759 Damn! 1115 00:55:16,761 --> 00:55:19,096 - You was fatter than any of us! - Oh-ho-ho! 1116 00:55:19,098 --> 00:55:20,698 Them titties though! 1117 00:55:20,700 --> 00:55:23,333 Get off of me, man. 1118 00:55:23,335 --> 00:55:25,101 Yeah, okay, I was a fat ass. 1119 00:55:25,103 --> 00:55:26,969 And now I'm an asshole. 1120 00:55:26,971 --> 00:55:30,574 Look, I hated myself so much for being fat, man. 1121 00:55:30,576 --> 00:55:33,377 When I got in shape, 1122 00:55:33,379 --> 00:55:37,614 I still hated Fat Hutch so much I was a dick to anybody that looked like him. 1123 00:55:37,616 --> 00:55:38,949 Quit lying, Hutch. 1124 00:55:38,951 --> 00:55:42,786 I've seen you be a dick to everybody, fat and skinny. 1125 00:55:42,788 --> 00:55:45,422 Marshall, stop fucking up my moment. 1126 00:55:45,424 --> 00:55:46,857 Sorry. 1127 00:55:46,859 --> 00:55:49,960 Look, the point is, if I can do it, so can y'all. 1128 00:55:49,962 --> 00:55:52,395 And I know you can kill it at this dance. 1129 00:55:52,397 --> 00:55:55,431 Just don't be assholes, all right? 1130 00:55:55,433 --> 00:55:58,534 There's a thin line between confidence and arrogance, and I need to see y'all straddle it. 1131 00:55:58,536 --> 00:56:00,471 No homo. 1132 00:56:00,473 --> 00:56:03,540 Right. Not doing that anymore. 1133 00:56:03,542 --> 00:56:05,509 My bad. 1134 00:56:05,511 --> 00:56:08,478 All right, men, when you walk into this dance, you gotta have swagger. 1135 00:56:08,480 --> 00:56:10,380 It's all about your presence, how you carry yourselves. 1136 00:56:10,382 --> 00:56:12,149 You gotta carry yourself with confidence. 1137 00:56:12,151 --> 00:56:14,851 A little swagger, point at somebody you know, all right? 1138 00:56:14,853 --> 00:56:17,087 Don't point at anybody you don't know. That's very weird. 1139 00:56:17,089 --> 00:56:18,489 All right? Let's go. 1140 00:56:18,491 --> 00:56:20,790 Kyle, let's see this. Stop grabbing your dick. 1141 00:56:20,792 --> 00:56:23,527 What you grabbing your dick for? Let your dick go. 1142 00:56:23,529 --> 00:56:26,629 What... You look like you're doing little mini curtsies. Stop doing that. 1143 00:56:26,631 --> 00:56:27,998 Don't point at nobody walking like that. 1144 00:56:28,000 --> 00:56:29,900 Pick it up! 1145 00:56:29,902 --> 00:56:32,402 All right, y'all, two-step. Two-step. Hit that. 1146 00:56:32,404 --> 00:56:34,971 Stop using all your body! It's a two-step with your feet! Goddamn it. 1147 00:56:34,973 --> 00:56:36,140 What's up, bro? 1148 00:56:36,142 --> 00:56:37,940 Hey, hey, bro, can I get some... 1149 00:56:37,942 --> 00:56:39,542 Can I get a burger with that sh-shake? 1150 00:56:39,544 --> 00:56:41,612 I like your eyes. I like your mouth hole. 1151 00:56:41,614 --> 00:56:44,515 When you see a chick that you like, nod at her, you know? 1152 00:56:44,517 --> 00:56:47,717 Just a little swagger. Get your post up like this and just nod at her. 1153 00:56:47,719 --> 00:56:51,120 If you can't get your butt off the ground, girls don't want to be around! 1154 00:56:51,122 --> 00:56:53,425 Looking good, y'all. Let's go. Keep it up. 1155 00:56:54,593 --> 00:56:57,761 Back this way. Looking good, y'all. 1156 00:56:57,763 --> 00:57:00,663 The whip and the nae nae, it's a very important dance, all right? 1157 00:57:00,665 --> 00:57:02,632 Go, step into the whip. Whip. 1158 00:57:02,634 --> 00:57:04,435 Step into your whip. Whip. 1159 00:57:04,437 --> 00:57:06,203 Whip. There you go. Whip. 1160 00:57:06,205 --> 00:57:08,471 Up. Jump. 1161 00:57:08,473 --> 00:57:10,007 Hope y'all better with girls than you are with exercising. 1162 00:57:10,009 --> 00:57:11,841 Down. Push-up. 1163 00:57:11,843 --> 00:57:13,042 Jump. 1164 00:57:13,044 --> 00:57:14,877 Jump. Down. 1165 00:57:14,879 --> 00:57:16,547 ...eighteen, 19... 1166 00:57:16,549 --> 00:57:19,082 Week four. Yeah! 1167 00:57:19,084 --> 00:57:20,783 - Killed it! - Yeah, that's how you do it, baby! 1168 00:57:20,785 --> 00:57:22,518 ...twenty-five, 26... 1169 00:57:22,520 --> 00:57:25,621 Another four! Yeah! 1170 00:57:25,623 --> 00:57:27,024 Point at somebody you know. 1171 00:57:27,026 --> 00:57:29,893 Oh, yeah, they see it, they see it. 1172 00:57:29,895 --> 00:57:31,627 'Sup, boo? 1173 00:57:31,629 --> 00:57:33,663 What's your name? 1174 00:57:33,665 --> 00:57:36,667 Wait. Say it slow. 1175 00:57:36,669 --> 00:57:39,169 I've never really heard the voice of an angel before. 1176 00:57:39,171 --> 00:57:40,904 ♪ Let's get away ♪ 1177 00:57:40,906 --> 00:57:42,239 ♪ Up in the clouds ♪ 1178 00:57:42,241 --> 00:57:44,174 ♪ It's such a better day ♪ 1179 00:57:44,176 --> 00:57:45,942 - Okay, all right. - ♪ Well, get on out ♪ 1180 00:57:45,944 --> 00:57:48,212 ♪ We gonna celebrate ♪ 1181 00:57:48,214 --> 00:57:50,080 - Ooh! - Oh-ho-ho! 1182 00:57:50,082 --> 00:57:51,248 Ready? Go! 1183 00:57:51,250 --> 00:57:52,716 Whip. 1184 00:57:52,718 --> 00:57:54,250 Watch me nae nae. 1185 00:57:54,252 --> 00:57:55,953 - Wrong hand, Marshall. - Whip, whip. 1186 00:57:55,955 --> 00:57:57,554 - My bad, my bad. - Nae nae. 1187 00:57:57,556 --> 00:57:58,955 Damn, girl. 1188 00:57:58,957 --> 00:58:00,991 Your name must be Stevia. 1189 00:58:00,993 --> 00:58:04,228 'Cause you're sweet like sugar but without the guilt. 1190 00:58:06,698 --> 00:58:08,732 Hey, way to get em', dawg. That was dope. 1191 00:58:08,734 --> 00:58:11,067 Yeah, that was sick. Sizzle it up. 1192 00:58:11,069 --> 00:58:14,004 - Oh! - Hey, so now y'all know what swagger looks like. 1193 00:58:14,006 --> 00:58:15,938 I'm proud of y'all, man! 1194 00:58:15,940 --> 00:58:18,641 Look, take that shit to the dance, you'll be fine, all right? 1195 00:58:18,643 --> 00:58:20,810 I wouldn't listen to a word he says. 1196 00:58:20,812 --> 00:58:23,779 Ooh! Punanny! 1197 00:58:23,781 --> 00:58:25,882 Hey, you. Going to the party later? 1198 00:58:25,884 --> 00:58:28,819 - Little booze, skinny-dipping... - You really don't listen, do you? 1199 00:58:28,821 --> 00:58:31,087 I try not to, but you keep talking. 1200 00:58:31,089 --> 00:58:33,824 Damn. You know I'm gonna show this to the cops. You goin' to jail. 1201 00:58:33,826 --> 00:58:36,627 I'll be in a house with other battered men, and we'll just talk about... 1202 00:58:36,629 --> 00:58:39,763 - You are an idiot. - Verbal abuse too? Shit. 1203 00:58:39,765 --> 00:58:41,765 I am taking a 24 for my dad's birthday. 1204 00:58:41,767 --> 00:58:43,567 Hutch! Hutch! 1205 00:58:43,569 --> 00:58:45,835 - Yeah, what's up, Rebecca? - You have a big problem. 1206 00:58:45,837 --> 00:58:48,004 Eric just told me that Douglas 1207 00:58:48,006 --> 00:58:50,776 is gonna have his whole cabin pants you guys in front of everyone at the dance. 1208 00:58:51,710 --> 00:58:53,109 Wait, what? 1209 00:58:53,111 --> 00:58:56,648 They're going to pants you. 1210 00:59:10,261 --> 00:59:12,728 Now we're extra fucked. 1211 00:59:12,730 --> 00:59:14,765 Come on, guys. You can't give up that easy. 1212 00:59:14,767 --> 00:59:16,699 We just gotta find a way to get 'em back. 1213 00:59:16,701 --> 00:59:19,538 There's no getting them back after they publicly pants us. 1214 00:59:22,875 --> 00:59:24,844 Yo. I know exactly what we need to do. 1215 00:59:27,745 --> 00:59:30,147 That is so stupid, Hutch! 1216 00:59:30,149 --> 00:59:32,049 - Stupid! - Something's wrong with you, Hutch! 1217 00:59:32,051 --> 00:59:34,618 - I'm triggered! - If you don't stand up for yourselves now, 1218 00:59:34,620 --> 00:59:37,187 people are gonna shit on you for the rest of your lives! 1219 00:59:37,189 --> 00:59:40,257 Hey, what if we wear really tight jeans with really tight belts. 1220 00:59:40,259 --> 00:59:42,292 - That could work out. - No, Marshall. 1221 00:59:42,294 --> 00:59:45,261 Dude, it doesn't matter. They'll always be the cool guys and we'll be the marks. 1222 00:59:45,263 --> 00:59:47,763 Doesn't have to be that way. That's what I'm trying to tell you guys. 1223 00:59:47,765 --> 00:59:49,866 - Yo, I'm definitely not going. - Me neither. 1224 00:59:49,868 --> 00:59:51,701 Yeah, as if it didn't suck enough! 1225 00:59:51,703 --> 00:59:53,804 - Yeah, even I think it's a bad idea. - Charlie, come on. 1226 00:59:53,806 --> 00:59:55,672 - Guys! - No! 1227 00:59:55,674 --> 00:59:58,141 Trust me, man! You'll be legends! 1228 00:59:58,143 --> 01:00:00,277 If this is your idea of a good plan, 1229 01:00:00,279 --> 01:00:02,179 then you should go to idiot camp! 1230 01:00:02,181 --> 01:00:03,216 What? 1231 01:00:04,984 --> 01:00:08,018 I don't know. It sounded much funnier in my head. 1232 01:00:08,020 --> 01:00:09,920 - Come on. - Guys! 1233 01:00:09,922 --> 01:00:12,325 Come on. Don't bail, man. Damn. 1234 01:00:19,230 --> 01:00:21,665 I have no idea, man. 1235 01:00:24,969 --> 01:00:26,071 Cheers! 1236 01:00:28,940 --> 01:00:30,373 Hey, guys. 1237 01:00:38,884 --> 01:00:41,250 Drink up, Charlie. 1238 01:00:41,252 --> 01:00:43,920 Life's just one big disappointment after the other. 1239 01:00:43,922 --> 01:00:46,089 These kids don't give a damn about us. 1240 01:00:46,091 --> 01:00:48,158 You know I can't drink. I'm a CIT. 1241 01:00:48,160 --> 01:00:50,926 You're being a real C-U-N-T right now. Come on, man. 1242 01:00:50,928 --> 01:00:52,828 Fuck up and learn from it. 1243 01:00:52,830 --> 01:00:55,067 You know? Spend one day not walking on sunshine. 1244 01:00:59,004 --> 01:01:00,206 Thank you. 1245 01:01:03,075 --> 01:01:04,310 Agh! 1246 01:01:05,678 --> 01:01:07,380 Oh, God. 1247 01:01:10,815 --> 01:01:13,185 - Candace here, huh? - Yeah, how'd you know? 1248 01:01:14,886 --> 01:01:17,754 You can make your move, all right? 1249 01:01:17,756 --> 01:01:20,056 But you're gonna need alcohol. 1250 01:01:20,058 --> 01:01:24,460 Because you, my friend, have very, very, tiny baby balls. 1251 01:01:24,462 --> 01:01:28,297 And this will grow 'em to big boy size. 1252 01:01:28,299 --> 01:01:31,000 Hey, Hutch, I have some of that cinnamon whiskey you like. 1253 01:01:31,002 --> 01:01:32,101 Shot later? 1254 01:01:32,103 --> 01:01:33,303 Hey, Candace! 1255 01:01:33,305 --> 01:01:35,871 - Hey. - Nice sweater. 1256 01:01:35,873 --> 01:01:40,076 But you know, adults lose ten percent of their body heat through their head, 1257 01:01:40,078 --> 01:01:43,216 so if you're cold, you should wear a hat? 1258 01:01:44,183 --> 01:01:45,848 Wow. 1259 01:01:45,850 --> 01:01:48,951 You must be so wet right now. 1260 01:01:48,953 --> 01:01:50,987 I'm gonna let you two chat 1261 01:01:50,989 --> 01:01:52,692 and do butt stuff. 1262 01:01:58,196 --> 01:02:00,330 We all used to drink when we were CIT's. 1263 01:02:00,332 --> 01:02:01,834 Just don't go overboard. 1264 01:02:06,839 --> 01:02:08,071 Ooh. 1265 01:02:08,073 --> 01:02:09,940 Smooth. 1266 01:02:09,942 --> 01:02:13,210 Very smooth, very sexy. 1267 01:02:22,353 --> 01:02:26,125 It's beautiful out here! Why is nobody in the water? 1268 01:02:28,426 --> 01:02:33,462 All right, this shrinkage is unsuitable for public viewing. 1269 01:02:33,464 --> 01:02:35,367 I'm calling it a night. 1270 01:02:36,835 --> 01:02:38,000 You want my towel? 1271 01:02:38,002 --> 01:02:40,370 Uh, no. 1272 01:02:40,372 --> 01:02:42,806 Don't be stupid. Take the towel. 1273 01:02:42,808 --> 01:02:44,277 All right. Oh. 1274 01:02:47,078 --> 01:02:49,414 The shrinkage isn't that bad, btdubs. 1275 01:03:13,437 --> 01:03:15,774 Holy shit. Fifteen minutes till breakfast? 1276 01:03:17,576 --> 01:03:20,277 Guys! Guys, get up! Everybody, get up! 1277 01:03:20,279 --> 01:03:22,846 Guys. Guys, get up. 1278 01:03:22,848 --> 01:03:25,147 Wake up, wake up. Guys, guys, we gotta get up. 1279 01:03:25,149 --> 01:03:27,417 It's breakfast, guys. We gotta get up. 1280 01:03:27,419 --> 01:03:28,520 Guys... 1281 01:03:30,388 --> 01:03:32,157 What the hell is going on here? 1282 01:03:35,460 --> 01:03:39,895 Oh, sh... Uh, we were probably just trying to keep warm, man, you know? 1283 01:03:39,897 --> 01:03:42,234 Yeah? Clothes usually help with that. 1284 01:03:43,968 --> 01:03:45,337 Fourteen minutes till breakfast. 1285 01:03:46,839 --> 01:03:49,475 I'd hurry up if you want to make it... friend. 1286 01:03:51,542 --> 01:03:52,811 Charlie. 1287 01:03:56,381 --> 01:03:58,013 Fuck. 1288 01:04:01,553 --> 01:04:03,053 Charlie! 1289 01:04:03,055 --> 01:04:04,620 Hey! 1290 01:04:04,622 --> 01:04:07,392 Cutting it close to breakfast, huh? Need a lift? 1291 01:04:09,160 --> 01:04:11,029 Hey, you all right? 1292 01:04:12,964 --> 01:04:14,100 I smell booze? 1293 01:04:14,933 --> 01:04:17,000 Aaah! 1294 01:04:17,002 --> 01:04:18,301 Fuck! 1295 01:04:18,303 --> 01:04:19,636 No! 1296 01:04:19,638 --> 01:04:21,841 No. Just walk away. 1297 01:04:23,542 --> 01:04:24,844 Sorry. 1298 01:04:26,377 --> 01:04:29,047 Fuuuuck! 1299 01:04:30,549 --> 01:04:31,851 Fuck! 1300 01:04:35,286 --> 01:04:36,989 Gah, fuck! 1301 01:04:46,364 --> 01:04:47,931 Come on, Charlie. What are you doing? 1302 01:04:47,933 --> 01:04:50,132 Look, man, I was blackout drunk last night. 1303 01:04:50,134 --> 01:04:51,903 I don't even know what happened for real, man. 1304 01:04:53,138 --> 01:04:55,241 Say something, Charlie. Come on. 1305 01:04:56,942 --> 01:04:59,643 You could've had anybody that you wanted, 1306 01:04:59,645 --> 01:05:02,978 and you still went and fucked the only girl that I've ever given a shit about? 1307 01:05:04,549 --> 01:05:07,317 Everybody told me that you were such a douche, 1308 01:05:07,319 --> 01:05:10,056 and I said that there was a good guy in there, but I was wrong! 1309 01:05:12,156 --> 01:05:14,424 You're a hollow skin suit. 1310 01:05:14,426 --> 01:05:15,895 You're a broken human. 1311 01:05:17,194 --> 01:05:19,395 You've got no heart, 1312 01:05:19,397 --> 01:05:21,166 no backbone, no balls. 1313 01:05:25,404 --> 01:05:27,370 Okay, I get it, man. 1314 01:05:27,372 --> 01:05:30,406 I-I get it, y-you hate me, man. But come on. Don't leave camp. 1315 01:05:30,408 --> 01:05:33,275 - You love this place. - Oh, like I have a choice? 1316 01:05:33,277 --> 01:05:35,013 You think I want to leave here? 1317 01:05:36,480 --> 01:05:38,448 I just got fired, Hutch. 1318 01:05:38,450 --> 01:05:39,919 For being drunk. 1319 01:05:41,252 --> 01:05:43,455 But at least I wasn't being a C-U-N-T, right? 1320 01:05:46,024 --> 01:05:47,393 Charlie, come on, man. 1321 01:05:54,565 --> 01:05:56,333 Uncle Mike, man, you can't fire Charlie. 1322 01:05:56,335 --> 01:05:58,000 He vomited on me, 1323 01:05:58,002 --> 01:06:00,036 and I smelled like a frat house sofa. 1324 01:06:00,038 --> 01:06:02,071 And I swear it got on everything. 1325 01:06:02,073 --> 01:06:06,141 The entire camp looks like a giant puke germ. 1326 01:06:06,143 --> 01:06:08,113 I get that... 1327 01:06:09,647 --> 01:06:11,181 I spiked his drink. 1328 01:06:11,183 --> 01:06:13,049 - Excuse me? - Yeah, I... He... 1329 01:06:13,051 --> 01:06:15,085 He needed confidence to hit on Candace, 1330 01:06:15,087 --> 01:06:17,152 so I gave him some. 1331 01:06:17,154 --> 01:06:19,121 Uncle Mike, man, you said it yourself 1332 01:06:19,123 --> 01:06:22,591 that if I let myself love this place, I could, and I did, man. 1333 01:06:22,593 --> 01:06:26,129 I-I-I love it here. I love the campers, Charlie, everybody. 1334 01:06:26,131 --> 01:06:27,696 And it's all due to your influence. 1335 01:06:27,698 --> 01:06:29,332 Oh, really? Let me get this straight. 1336 01:06:29,334 --> 01:06:32,301 Because of my influence, you poisoned your best friend, 1337 01:06:32,303 --> 01:06:34,703 fucked his crush, and then got him fired? 1338 01:06:34,705 --> 01:06:36,605 Well, when you put it like that, man... 1339 01:06:36,607 --> 01:06:40,513 Hutch, I'm trying to build this camp back to prominence. 1340 01:06:41,680 --> 01:06:43,612 I gave you a job as a favor, 1341 01:06:43,614 --> 01:06:45,618 and you get one of my best guys fired? 1342 01:06:48,020 --> 01:06:50,152 I can't believe you, man. You know what? Get out of my camp. 1343 01:06:50,154 --> 01:06:53,623 What? Uncle Mike, come on, man. These kids need me. 1344 01:06:53,625 --> 01:06:56,025 No, they don't need you. You know what? 1345 01:06:56,027 --> 01:06:57,696 The best thing I could do for these kids... 1346 01:07:00,198 --> 01:07:02,268 is to keep them away from someone like you. 1347 01:07:03,502 --> 01:07:05,435 Uncle Mike, come on, man. 1348 01:07:05,437 --> 01:07:07,603 The worst part about it is now I gotta tell your mother 1349 01:07:07,605 --> 01:07:09,308 that you actually are the bum she thought you were. 1350 01:07:15,680 --> 01:07:17,683 You couldn't make it work for one summer, huh? 1351 01:07:21,585 --> 01:07:23,022 Get out of my camp. 1352 01:07:37,669 --> 01:07:39,134 What the hell? 1353 01:07:39,136 --> 01:07:40,335 Hutch! 1354 01:07:40,337 --> 01:07:41,571 - Hey, Hutch! - Hutch! 1355 01:07:41,573 --> 01:07:42,674 Come back! 1356 01:07:43,808 --> 01:07:45,243 Are you leaving? 1357 01:07:47,511 --> 01:07:50,279 - Hutch! - What are you doing? 1358 01:07:50,281 --> 01:07:52,350 - Dude, where are you going? - Don't go! 1359 01:07:55,087 --> 01:07:57,152 Cut him off, dude. Bro, come on! 1360 01:07:57,154 --> 01:07:58,223 Come on! 1361 01:07:59,524 --> 01:08:01,290 Hutch! Man, what are you doing? 1362 01:08:01,292 --> 01:08:03,460 - Hutch! Hutch! - Where are you going, Hutch? 1363 01:08:03,462 --> 01:08:04,694 Come on! Come on! 1364 01:08:04,696 --> 01:08:06,065 - Hutch! - Hutch! 1365 01:08:57,314 --> 01:09:00,385 Hey, Ma! Ma, it's me! Open up! 1366 01:09:01,720 --> 01:09:02,755 Ma! 1367 01:09:05,523 --> 01:09:07,624 Yo, who the fuck are you? 1368 01:09:07,626 --> 01:09:09,292 Uh, Fred. 1369 01:09:09,294 --> 01:09:12,494 Yo, Ma, who the fuck is Fred? 1370 01:09:12,496 --> 01:09:15,832 - Fred's my fuck buddy right now. - Oh, my God. 1371 01:09:15,834 --> 01:09:19,168 But he's kinda growing on me, so I'm thinking about upgrading him to my A-piece. 1372 01:09:19,170 --> 01:09:21,271 Mmm, I'm about to be somebody A-piece? 1373 01:09:21,273 --> 01:09:23,806 I'm about to throw up in the toilet, then sleep in my own bedroom. 1374 01:09:23,808 --> 01:09:25,544 No, no, no, no, no. Hold on. Wait, wait, wait. 1375 01:09:30,849 --> 01:09:33,716 - What the heck is this brother wearing? - None of your business. 1376 01:09:33,718 --> 01:09:36,819 - Uh... - Son, your room doesn't exist anymore. 1377 01:09:36,821 --> 01:09:39,722 It's now my red room, like Fifty Shades of Grey? 1378 01:09:39,724 --> 01:09:42,592 And I don't think you'd get a good night's sleep on my pleasure swing. 1379 01:09:42,594 --> 01:09:45,628 Okay, I'ma throw up right here on this cement, and I'll just sleep in the den. 1380 01:09:45,630 --> 01:09:47,463 No, you can't do that either. 1381 01:09:47,465 --> 01:09:50,333 Son, I can't keep enabling you. 1382 01:09:50,335 --> 01:09:53,235 The fact that your life sucks is either nature or nurture, 1383 01:09:53,237 --> 01:09:55,771 but whatever it is, it's my fault. 1384 01:09:55,773 --> 01:09:57,472 Ma. 1385 01:09:57,474 --> 01:09:59,475 Come on. I'm your son. 1386 01:09:59,477 --> 01:10:03,181 If I don't push your ass off that cliff, you'll never fly. 1387 01:10:04,248 --> 01:10:05,949 Bye. 1388 01:10:05,951 --> 01:10:08,250 Um... It was nice meeting you. 1389 01:10:08,252 --> 01:10:10,520 Nigga, you ain't met me, man! 1390 01:10:10,522 --> 01:10:11,788 Stop jumping your little-ass man-titties. 1391 01:10:11,790 --> 01:10:14,257 What the hell am I supposed to do Ma, huh? 1392 01:10:14,259 --> 01:10:17,526 Blow some strangers in the bus station for meth money? 1393 01:10:17,528 --> 01:10:19,728 At least you'd be generating some income! 1394 01:10:19,730 --> 01:10:22,501 Oh, that's gross, Ma. It was a joke, man. Goddamn it. 1395 01:10:25,937 --> 01:10:27,406 - Thank you. - Mm-hmm. 1396 01:10:28,773 --> 01:10:31,274 Okay, Hutch. We've got some rules here. 1397 01:10:31,276 --> 01:10:33,409 Don't touch my booze. Absolutely no pot. 1398 01:10:33,411 --> 01:10:35,511 I don't cook for you, I don't clean for you, 1399 01:10:35,513 --> 01:10:37,446 and you know that phrase "make yourself at home"? 1400 01:10:37,448 --> 01:10:38,580 Don't. 1401 01:10:38,582 --> 01:10:40,415 Ooh, burn. 1402 01:10:40,417 --> 01:10:41,918 - Okay? Love you. - You got it, babe. Love you. 1403 01:10:41,920 --> 01:10:43,285 - Love you. - Love you. 1404 01:10:43,287 --> 01:10:45,254 - Love you too, Maggie. - Aw. Fuck off. 1405 01:10:45,256 --> 01:10:46,521 Okay. 1406 01:10:46,523 --> 01:10:49,459 Yo, don't ever tell her this, man, 1407 01:10:49,461 --> 01:10:51,660 but I kind of like her, dude. 1408 01:10:51,662 --> 01:10:53,765 - She a tough broad. - Sometimes too tough. 1409 01:10:54,765 --> 01:10:56,566 So what's next, man? 1410 01:10:56,568 --> 01:10:58,601 I'll probably jack off, call it a night. 1411 01:10:58,603 --> 01:11:00,969 Dude, she's talking about life. 1412 01:11:00,971 --> 01:11:02,704 This is a crucial moment, Hutch. 1413 01:11:02,706 --> 01:11:05,374 I mean, you can decide to be a decent human... 1414 01:11:05,376 --> 01:11:07,576 Or a bum-ass nigga. 1415 01:11:07,578 --> 01:11:09,378 Come on, man. Dave's right. 1416 01:11:09,380 --> 01:11:11,647 You're talented, you're smart, you're funny. 1417 01:11:11,649 --> 01:11:14,717 I hate to say it, but you are attractive. 1418 01:11:14,719 --> 01:11:17,355 You got all the tools, bro. You gotta use 'em. 1419 01:11:20,358 --> 01:11:23,359 Look, I know I don't say this enough, but, uh, 1420 01:11:23,361 --> 01:11:25,695 I really love y'all, man, for having my back. 1421 01:11:25,697 --> 01:11:30,333 Enough? You've never said that, in your entire life, to anyone. 1422 01:11:30,335 --> 01:11:32,468 And I can't believe you didn't say "no homo" afterwards. 1423 01:11:32,470 --> 01:11:33,969 - Right. - Babe. 1424 01:11:33,971 --> 01:11:35,905 Ah, you better go fetch that, bruh. 1425 01:11:35,907 --> 01:11:37,774 "Babe." 1426 01:11:37,776 --> 01:11:39,545 - I'll handle this. Whoa. - Oh, come on, man. 1427 01:11:41,479 --> 01:11:43,646 Yo, Winnie, uh... 1428 01:11:43,648 --> 01:11:47,683 You ever thought I was being a dick to you because you're a lesbian? 1429 01:11:47,685 --> 01:11:50,887 What? No. I thought you were being a dick to me because you are a dick. 1430 01:11:50,889 --> 01:11:52,821 - Hmm. True. - And because I'm a woman 1431 01:11:52,823 --> 01:11:55,424 who makes more money than you, I have a better job than yours, 1432 01:11:55,426 --> 01:11:58,393 I get more chicks than you, and I don't live with my mom. 1433 01:11:58,395 --> 01:12:01,864 I got it! Damn! How long is that list? 1434 01:12:01,866 --> 01:12:03,598 I mean, long. Shit, you asked. 1435 01:12:03,600 --> 01:12:05,000 You right. Touché. 1436 01:12:05,002 --> 01:12:06,572 Damn. 1437 01:12:07,639 --> 01:12:08,971 Uh... 1438 01:12:08,973 --> 01:12:10,876 Yo, I'm gonna try to be less of a dick, all right? 1439 01:12:12,544 --> 01:12:14,076 Think that'd be a great fucking start, bruh. 1440 01:12:14,078 --> 01:12:15,911 I'ma really try this time. 1441 01:12:15,913 --> 01:12:17,780 In the meantime, get yourself some rest, man. 1442 01:12:17,782 --> 01:12:20,350 Try to keep this place clean, all right? I'm here for you, buddy. 1443 01:12:20,352 --> 01:12:21,452 'Ppreciate ya. 1444 01:12:23,554 --> 01:12:25,655 Hi. I'm Charlie Soto. 1445 01:12:25,657 --> 01:12:28,825 - I was told I could find Hutch here. - Why are you so happy, bro? 1446 01:12:28,827 --> 01:12:31,360 - Mm-mmm. - He's in there. 1447 01:12:31,362 --> 01:12:33,730 Charlie. Man, I'm so... 1448 01:12:33,732 --> 01:12:36,466 You told Big Mike that you spiked my drink? 1449 01:12:36,468 --> 01:12:38,700 - Yeah. - That took a backbone. 1450 01:12:38,702 --> 01:12:40,736 And a heart and balls. 1451 01:12:40,738 --> 01:12:42,838 And Candace told me what really happened... 1452 01:12:42,840 --> 01:12:45,441 that basically you passed out and you couldn't even get it up to have sex. 1453 01:12:45,443 --> 01:12:47,576 She said... Oh, I can get it up. 1454 01:12:47,578 --> 01:12:50,445 - Goddamn it, I'm up right now. - That means you didn't have sex with her. 1455 01:12:50,447 --> 01:12:52,582 - You should be happy that you didn't betray me. - No, I get it. 1456 01:12:52,584 --> 01:12:55,517 I didn't betray you, but my schlong, it works. Overtime. 1457 01:12:55,519 --> 01:12:57,619 Employee of the fucking month, just on a frame. 1458 01:12:57,621 --> 01:13:00,423 Point is, fuck Candace. 1459 01:13:00,425 --> 01:13:02,758 She would've had sex with my best friend. 1460 01:13:02,760 --> 01:13:05,397 And you helped me learn that I deserve better than that. 1461 01:13:06,764 --> 01:13:08,063 Yeah, you do, man. 1462 01:13:08,065 --> 01:13:10,098 But you also helped me learn that 1463 01:13:10,100 --> 01:13:13,136 we have to do this Lone Pine plan. 1464 01:13:13,138 --> 01:13:15,704 We have to end these kids' summer with a bang. 1465 01:13:15,706 --> 01:13:17,573 Mmm... 1466 01:13:17,575 --> 01:13:19,642 - What? - Nothin'. 1467 01:13:19,644 --> 01:13:21,744 These kids still aren't down with this pantsing thing. 1468 01:13:21,746 --> 01:13:23,879 I need you to come back and convince them. 1469 01:13:23,881 --> 01:13:27,682 If they don't do this, they're gonna regret it for their whole entire life. 1470 01:13:27,684 --> 01:13:29,020 What do you say? 1471 01:13:31,989 --> 01:13:34,824 - Hell yeah, man. Come on. Let's do it. Yeah. - Yes! 1472 01:13:34,826 --> 01:13:37,096 It's gonna feel so good not to lay down and take it for once. 1473 01:13:38,897 --> 01:13:41,030 - Okay, go ahead and say it. - No homo, man. Damn! 1474 01:13:41,032 --> 01:13:42,832 - I'm sorry. - You were killing me with that shit. 1475 01:13:42,834 --> 01:13:44,866 - It was really bad. I'm sorry. - I gotta grab my bags. 1476 01:13:44,868 --> 01:13:46,802 - Okay, grab 'em, grab 'em. - All my trash bags. 1477 01:13:46,804 --> 01:13:48,506 Okay, my mom's got the car running, so hurry up. 1478 01:13:55,813 --> 01:13:58,580 - What's up, Big Mike? - Little Timmy. That's my man. 1479 01:14:00,885 --> 01:14:02,554 - Good. Great. - Yeah. 1480 01:14:17,568 --> 01:14:19,502 Why you dressed like the Unabomber again? 1481 01:14:19,504 --> 01:14:21,536 'Cause I'm trying not to be spotted by Big Mike, man. 1482 01:14:21,538 --> 01:14:23,541 I'm incog-negro. Chill. 1483 01:14:28,112 --> 01:14:29,978 - Yo, hang on. - Hmm. 1484 01:14:31,950 --> 01:14:33,516 Hutch, what the hell? 1485 01:14:33,518 --> 01:14:35,618 This little butt boil is dicking you around. 1486 01:14:35,620 --> 01:14:38,186 Hey, leave her alone, or I'm gonna kick your smug little ass, 1487 01:14:38,188 --> 01:14:40,655 and I don't work for the camp anymore, so it's street rules in this bitch. 1488 01:14:40,657 --> 01:14:41,958 Hutch, are you crazy? 1489 01:14:41,960 --> 01:14:44,227 - He's dating Rebecca as a goof. - No, I'm not. 1490 01:14:44,229 --> 01:14:47,496 I only said that so they'd leave me alone. I like Rebecca. 1491 01:14:47,498 --> 01:14:50,132 Everybody makes fun of me for it, but I'm done giving a shit. 1492 01:14:50,134 --> 01:14:53,134 I can choose my own girlfriend. Fuck what anybody thinks. 1493 01:14:53,136 --> 01:14:55,570 - Girlfriend? - Um, yeah. 1494 01:14:55,572 --> 01:14:56,905 What do you say, Becks? 1495 01:14:56,907 --> 01:14:59,976 Abby. Abby, come on. Please, talk to me. 1496 01:14:59,978 --> 01:15:04,012 Sure. Because the Candace thing and the Jill Hendricks thing wasn't enough. 1497 01:15:04,014 --> 01:15:06,649 If you could fuck me over a third time, it'll be just great. 1498 01:15:06,651 --> 01:15:08,950 - Abby, come on. Wait a second. - Hey. 1499 01:15:08,952 --> 01:15:10,520 What's this? 1500 01:15:10,522 --> 01:15:12,088 What are you doing at the dance? 1501 01:15:12,090 --> 01:15:14,757 I had to see my boys dance, all right? Just be cool. 1502 01:15:14,759 --> 01:15:17,660 Oh, I'll be real cool while I'm telling the cops you're trespassing. 1503 01:15:17,662 --> 01:15:19,594 Uncle Mike, we're family, man. 1504 01:15:25,737 --> 01:15:28,704 You can take the money for the new phone out my paycheck. 1505 01:15:28,706 --> 01:15:31,007 He said "paycheck." 1506 01:15:31,009 --> 01:15:33,276 - Come on. - Damn, that was some gangsta shit. 1507 01:15:33,278 --> 01:15:35,011 Respect, home. 1508 01:15:35,013 --> 01:15:37,679 So I was like, "Why would I give money to some bum?" 1509 01:15:37,681 --> 01:15:39,682 He's just gonna spend it on alcohol anyway. 1510 01:15:39,684 --> 01:15:43,151 Yeah. 1511 01:15:43,153 --> 01:15:46,588 Man, this must be the world's cleanest vaginas. 1512 01:15:46,590 --> 01:15:49,959 I see a whole pack of used douches. 1513 01:15:49,961 --> 01:15:52,194 I didn't think you were gonna make it, since you got sacked and all. 1514 01:15:52,196 --> 01:15:54,797 - Ooh. - Only thing getting regularly sacked 1515 01:15:54,799 --> 01:15:56,731 is your mama's chin and taint, boy! 1516 01:15:56,733 --> 01:15:58,868 Ooh! 1517 01:15:58,870 --> 01:16:01,137 Wanna throw down again, Daley? 1518 01:16:01,139 --> 01:16:03,806 Anytime, bitch. 1519 01:16:03,808 --> 01:16:06,976 But right now my boys got some business to attend to. 1520 01:16:06,978 --> 01:16:08,777 Well, may the dopest bros win. 1521 01:16:08,779 --> 01:16:10,081 Oh, they will. 1522 01:16:11,815 --> 01:16:13,682 We will. 1523 01:16:16,955 --> 01:16:19,688 ♪ By the end of the night You'll be home, girl ♪ 1524 01:16:19,690 --> 01:16:22,191 ♪ Talking all that ♪ 1525 01:16:22,193 --> 01:16:24,960 ♪ When I slide up in it Talking kids, huh ♪ 1526 01:16:24,962 --> 01:16:26,995 ♪ Worry about some rules That don't matter ♪ 1527 01:16:26,997 --> 01:16:29,298 ♪ Don't flatter me, baby You know I know that ♪ 1528 01:16:29,300 --> 01:16:30,766 Hey! 1529 01:16:50,220 --> 01:16:53,058 Losers! 1530 01:16:54,257 --> 01:16:55,691 Dope, Eddie! 1531 01:17:02,166 --> 01:17:03,665 - All right, now. - ♪ Oh, oh ♪ 1532 01:17:03,667 --> 01:17:05,036 ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 1533 01:17:10,308 --> 01:17:12,310 ♪ Oh, oh Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 1534 01:17:17,415 --> 01:17:18,748 ♪ Oh, oh Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 1535 01:17:18,750 --> 01:17:21,019 ♪ D-D-Does your mama know You dance like that? ♪ 1536 01:17:22,720 --> 01:17:24,152 Yeah! 1537 01:17:24,154 --> 01:17:25,855 ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 1538 01:17:25,857 --> 01:17:28,794 - ♪ Hey now ♪ - ♪ Does your mama know You dance like that? ♪ 1539 01:17:33,363 --> 01:17:34,597 - ♪ What's up? ♪ - ♪ Hey ♪ 1540 01:17:34,599 --> 01:17:36,966 ♪ Put your hands in the air Now jump, jump ♪ 1541 01:17:36,968 --> 01:17:39,134 ♪ Came in here To have fun, fun ♪ 1542 01:17:39,136 --> 01:17:41,803 ♪ Now do your dance Don't be shy ♪ 1543 01:17:41,805 --> 01:17:44,005 ♪ Go to work like a 9-to-5 ♪ 1544 01:17:44,007 --> 01:17:46,008 ♪ Oh, oh Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 1545 01:17:46,010 --> 01:17:48,977 ♪ Came in here To have fun, fun ♪ 1546 01:17:48,979 --> 01:17:51,079 ♪ Oh, oh Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 1547 01:17:51,081 --> 01:17:53,182 ♪ Does your mama know You dance like that? ♪ 1548 01:17:53,184 --> 01:17:55,418 ♪ Oh, oh Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 1549 01:17:55,420 --> 01:17:58,788 Hey, man, you worried about getting bitches with that thing? 1550 01:17:58,790 --> 01:18:01,457 You got a motherfucking third leg, bro. 1551 01:18:01,459 --> 01:18:03,394 ♪ Oh, oh Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 1552 01:18:06,029 --> 01:18:08,364 ♪ Oh, oh Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 1553 01:18:08,366 --> 01:18:09,999 ♪ Does your mama know You dance like that? ♪ 1554 01:18:10,001 --> 01:18:11,336 ♪ Let's go ♪ 1555 01:18:18,041 --> 01:18:20,008 ♪ T-T-Turn up the bass ♪ 1556 01:18:20,010 --> 01:18:22,813 - ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ - Whoo! 1557 01:18:26,184 --> 01:18:28,086 ♪ Does your mama know You dance like that? ♪ 1558 01:18:31,389 --> 01:18:33,088 Oh, yeah. 1559 01:18:33,090 --> 01:18:34,959 I love you, Kyle! 1560 01:18:36,094 --> 01:18:37,729 Yeah! 1561 01:18:39,730 --> 01:18:41,463 - What's up? I'm Andy. - What's up? 1562 01:18:41,465 --> 01:18:44,900 You crush my boy's heart, I'll stomp your skull in. 1563 01:18:44,902 --> 01:18:46,768 Carry on. 1564 01:18:56,947 --> 01:18:59,013 - Oh! - Come on! 1565 01:18:59,015 --> 01:19:01,049 Get up! Come on! Come on! Yeah! 1566 01:19:01,051 --> 01:19:03,218 Get up, everyone! Yeah! 1567 01:19:03,220 --> 01:19:04,486 Come on! 1568 01:19:04,488 --> 01:19:06,054 Whoo! 1569 01:19:06,056 --> 01:19:07,091 Jump! Jump! 1570 01:19:10,127 --> 01:19:12,360 Jump! Jump! Jump! Come on! 1571 01:19:12,362 --> 01:19:13,464 Come on! 1572 01:19:21,471 --> 01:19:22,873 Yeah! 1573 01:19:26,077 --> 01:19:27,145 Mm-hmm. 1574 01:19:33,818 --> 01:19:36,154 Yeah! Whoo-hoo! 1575 01:19:37,287 --> 01:19:39,088 Yeah, boys. 1576 01:19:39,090 --> 01:19:41,193 That's how you do it, man. That's how you do it! 1577 01:19:42,359 --> 01:19:45,093 Dude, that was awesome! 1578 01:19:45,095 --> 01:19:46,896 Way to go, bruh. You're dope. 1579 01:19:46,898 --> 01:19:49,030 Proud of y'all, man. 1580 01:19:49,032 --> 01:19:51,169 - They ain't see that coming. - Nope. 1581 01:19:53,938 --> 01:19:55,870 Attention, campers. 1582 01:19:55,872 --> 01:19:59,074 Even though this may be Camp Vision's last summer, 1583 01:19:59,076 --> 01:20:00,245 it's been a great one. 1584 01:20:01,845 --> 01:20:03,279 I'm not crying. 1585 01:20:04,381 --> 01:20:06,451 Yo, Hutch, Abby. 1586 01:20:09,153 --> 01:20:12,190 So, uh, while you were gone, your kids had their final weigh-in. 1587 01:20:13,825 --> 01:20:17,026 And they... lost more fat than any other cabin. 1588 01:20:17,028 --> 01:20:18,828 Yeah. 1589 01:20:18,830 --> 01:20:21,963 I don't know what to say. I guess dance practice paid off, man. 1590 01:20:21,965 --> 01:20:25,467 - Thanks, Uncle Mike. - Unfortunately, since you were technically fired at the time, 1591 01:20:25,469 --> 01:20:27,268 I can't give you the money. 1592 01:20:27,270 --> 01:20:28,870 Rules, bro. 1593 01:20:28,872 --> 01:20:31,076 So, Abby, the $5,000 is yours. 1594 01:20:33,044 --> 01:20:34,877 Hey, come on. I thought you'd be happier. 1595 01:20:34,879 --> 01:20:37,213 I'm not really used to being a runner-up. 1596 01:20:37,215 --> 01:20:40,548 What if there was a way I could make you happy. You too, Uncle Mike. 1597 01:20:40,550 --> 01:20:43,451 Just need a... little advance though. 1598 01:20:43,453 --> 01:20:45,521 Advance on what? 1599 01:20:45,523 --> 01:20:48,827 - Oh, yeah. - I don't like that face. 1600 01:20:52,196 --> 01:20:55,129 And with your investment, we'll create a brand-new program. 1601 01:20:55,131 --> 01:20:59,133 Abby and I both have psych degrees, and Big Mike has been in the business over 20 years. 1602 01:20:59,135 --> 01:21:01,270 Adding a psychological counseling component 1603 01:21:01,272 --> 01:21:03,304 to Camp Vision's focus on diet and exercise 1604 01:21:03,306 --> 01:21:05,540 will help us get to the root of their overeating. 1605 01:21:05,542 --> 01:21:07,042 I would help the male campers and... 1606 01:21:07,044 --> 01:21:09,378 My role will be to tailor a program 1607 01:21:09,380 --> 01:21:11,379 to young ladies who tend to have more intense 1608 01:21:11,381 --> 01:21:13,515 but very distinctive body issues during adolescence. 1609 01:21:13,517 --> 01:21:15,484 And the program would be yearlong, 1610 01:21:15,486 --> 01:21:17,518 but we would visit them at their homes 1611 01:21:17,520 --> 01:21:19,387 to make sure they're maintaining their exercises 1612 01:21:19,389 --> 01:21:22,423 and train our staff to connect with their hearts and minds 1613 01:21:22,425 --> 01:21:25,093 and not just their bellies and bitch tits. 1614 01:21:25,095 --> 01:21:27,362 - Bitch tits? - Did he say "bitch tits"? 1615 01:21:27,364 --> 01:21:30,298 Look, it's not just about shaping these kids up. 1616 01:21:30,300 --> 01:21:32,101 It's about connecting with their lives. 1617 01:21:32,103 --> 01:21:33,605 I really love these kids. 1618 01:21:35,273 --> 01:21:38,039 - Thank you. - Thank you. Thank you. 1619 01:21:38,041 --> 01:21:40,276 - Sorry about the bitch tits. - No. Okay. 1620 01:21:40,278 --> 01:21:42,610 I see. 1621 01:21:42,612 --> 01:21:44,612 All right, well, thank you for the call. 1622 01:21:44,614 --> 01:21:46,949 What'd they say? 1623 01:21:46,951 --> 01:21:48,950 Uh, they said they liked the proposal, 1624 01:21:48,952 --> 01:21:52,553 but if we want the job, we're gonna have to give a lot of sloppy blow jobs. 1625 01:21:52,555 --> 01:21:54,490 I'm serious, asshole. 1626 01:21:54,492 --> 01:21:56,528 - They said, "Welcome aboard." - Ah! 1627 01:21:59,596 --> 01:22:02,030 I am so proud of you. 1628 01:22:02,032 --> 01:22:04,232 Damn. I have never had anybody say that to me before. 1629 01:22:04,234 --> 01:22:06,035 - We have to celebrate. - We do. 1630 01:22:06,037 --> 01:22:08,070 You're right. I got this dope dinner spot, right? 1631 01:22:08,072 --> 01:22:09,641 I actually had a different idea. 1632 01:22:11,142 --> 01:22:13,010 Oh, this could be dinner too. 1633 01:22:16,112 --> 01:22:17,478 Fat Camp's over, y'all. 1634 01:22:17,480 --> 01:22:20,649 I don't need to lose weight. I'm a frickin' stud. 1635 01:22:20,651 --> 01:22:22,484 Yeah. 1636 01:22:22,486 --> 01:22:24,055 Big Mike comin' at ya. 1637 01:22:26,157 --> 01:22:28,723 Jamar Hilton Jeffers reporting for camp, sir! 1638 01:22:28,725 --> 01:22:31,196 That's right, fatties. Yeah. 1639 01:22:34,564 --> 01:22:35,933 No homo. 1640 01:22:37,100 --> 01:22:39,638 Right. I'm not doing that anymore. 1641 01:22:41,706 --> 01:22:46,040 Was it good for you... like it was for me? 1642 01:22:46,042 --> 01:22:49,744 That's right, fatty. We're gonna get your skinny on. 1643 01:22:49,746 --> 01:22:53,082 Super fat now. 1644 01:22:53,084 --> 01:22:55,353 Uh-huh. 1645 01:22:58,255 --> 01:23:00,392 I will get you. I'ma get you hard. 1646 01:23:03,728 --> 01:23:06,431 Uh! Fat Camp, y'all. 1647 01:23:08,431 --> 01:23:09,533 Get your boogie on. 1648 01:23:10,501 --> 01:23:11,636 Come on now. 1649 01:23:13,136 --> 01:23:14,272 We're goin' year-round. 1650 01:23:15,339 --> 01:23:16,440 Ha! 1651 01:23:18,376 --> 01:23:20,008 We're goin' year-round! 1652 01:23:20,010 --> 01:23:21,576 Has this ever happened to you? 1653 01:23:22,545 --> 01:23:23,779 Ha! 1654 01:23:25,248 --> 01:23:26,615 Hmm! 1655 01:23:26,617 --> 01:23:29,618 - Take three. Marker. - Ha! 1656 01:23:29,620 --> 01:23:32,553 Oh! Still nailed it! Whoo! Can't stop! 1657 01:23:32,555 --> 01:23:34,423 - Mmm! - I'm getting out! 1658 01:23:34,425 --> 01:23:37,092 Yeah, I did it! Whoo! 1659 01:23:37,094 --> 01:23:39,128 Whoo... Oh, wait. 1660 01:23:39,130 --> 01:23:42,330 Move the hand down and get that ass, right there. 1661 01:23:42,332 --> 01:23:43,499 Uh. 1662 01:23:43,501 --> 01:23:45,366 I got my own ass to grab. 1663 01:23:45,368 --> 01:23:47,802 All us people have secrets that we don't want to tell anybody 1664 01:23:47,804 --> 01:23:49,306 because we wanna feel safe. 1665 01:23:50,541 --> 01:23:52,673 Oh, wait, no. That's not my line. 1666 01:23:52,675 --> 01:23:54,176 What do you mean, "No"? 1667 01:23:54,178 --> 01:23:56,014 That's right, fatties. 1668 01:23:57,648 --> 01:23:59,548 - Hey, I tried to save you. - I know. 1669 01:24:04,188 --> 01:24:06,621 Before I met you, I... 1670 01:24:06,623 --> 01:24:09,792 I've never looked at someone Candace's size, at all. 1671 01:24:09,794 --> 01:24:11,660 Oh! 1672 01:24:11,662 --> 01:24:13,161 Big Mike, y'all. 1673 01:24:13,163 --> 01:24:15,530 And I'll keep comin' till I got ripped abs, 1674 01:24:15,532 --> 01:24:18,767 chiseled delts and overweight calf muscles. 1675 01:24:18,769 --> 01:24:20,602 Take it back from... 1676 01:24:20,604 --> 01:24:22,503 "Overweight calf muscles." 1677 01:24:22,505 --> 01:24:25,207 Thank you, I wanted to look like a pencil today. 1678 01:24:25,209 --> 01:24:27,176 You think prison rape is bad. 1679 01:24:27,178 --> 01:24:30,512 Try getting your little doo-doo puss tape-fucked by a guy... 1680 01:24:32,082 --> 01:24:33,548 Ow! 1681 01:24:33,550 --> 01:24:35,249 - Do that again. Ah! - Okay. 1682 01:24:35,251 --> 01:24:37,285 What the fuck? 1683 01:24:37,287 --> 01:24:39,088 - Do your exercise. - All right. 1684 01:24:39,090 --> 01:24:40,088 - Ah! - Do your jumping jacks. 1685 01:24:40,090 --> 01:24:41,423 Got it? 1686 01:24:41,425 --> 01:24:42,494 Do your push-ups. 1687 01:24:43,727 --> 01:24:45,229 Son of a bitch. 1688 01:24:46,397 --> 01:24:47,465 So... Goddamn it. 1689 01:24:48,465 --> 01:24:49,433 Hey. 1690 01:24:50,401 --> 01:24:51,633 Mmm! 1691 01:24:51,635 --> 01:24:53,401 We're set. 1692 01:24:53,403 --> 01:24:54,735 Got everything going in action. 1693 01:24:54,737 --> 01:24:56,204 Now here we go. 1694 01:24:56,206 --> 01:24:57,806 - What... - All right. 1695 01:24:57,808 --> 01:24:59,874 I'm not playin' with you, Chris. 1696 01:24:59,876 --> 01:25:02,878 I heard it. I heard, Mom, and my name's Hutch. 1697 01:25:02,880 --> 01:25:04,812 I mean Hutch. Why I wanna fuckin' call you Chris? 1698 01:25:06,416 --> 01:25:08,616 'Cause you love me already, girl! 1699 01:25:08,618 --> 01:25:10,319 Ow! 1700 01:25:10,321 --> 01:25:12,620 I'm like the male version of you with lighter skin. 1701 01:25:12,622 --> 01:25:15,124 No, you're not the male... I'm the male version of me. 1702 01:25:15,126 --> 01:25:18,392 Super fat. 1703 01:25:18,394 --> 01:25:19,695 Super. 1704 01:25:19,697 --> 01:25:21,132 Super fat now. 1705 01:25:24,201 --> 01:25:25,136 Uh. 1706 01:25:29,840 --> 01:25:31,874 That motherfucker cleared me. 1707 01:25:31,876 --> 01:25:34,646 I-I... I went... I almost went like that. 1708 01:25:37,814 --> 01:25:38,813 - Mmm! - Phew. 1709 01:25:41,785 --> 01:25:43,388 Ow! 1710 01:25:44,889 --> 01:25:46,588 Mmm! 1711 01:25:46,590 --> 01:25:48,390 Get your boogie on. 1712 01:25:48,392 --> 01:25:49,693 Get your groove on. 1713 01:25:50,693 --> 01:25:52,229 One time now. 1714 01:25:53,531 --> 01:25:54,832 Two times now. 1715 01:25:55,933 --> 01:25:58,299 Three time now. 1716 01:25:58,301 --> 01:25:59,571 Don't hurt yourself now. 1717 01:26:01,171 --> 01:26:02,573 'Bout to get skinny. 1718 01:26:03,674 --> 01:26:05,877 Yeah, what's the commotion? 1719 01:26:07,211 --> 01:26:08,643 We in motion. 1720 01:26:08,645 --> 01:26:10,579 Uh. Yeah. 1721 01:26:12,248 --> 01:26:14,419 My God, that's amazing! 1722 01:26:20,359 --> 01:26:25,359 Subtitles by explosiveskull 134483

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