All language subtitles for 417. The Girl From Auntie

(music)

(theme music)

(birds twittering)

(rooster crows)

Been away for a few days.

Mrs. Peel?

If you get tired of waiting,

there should be something
there to amuse you.

Oh, Mrs. Peel?

Yes? What can I do
for you?

I'm to deliver this
to Mrs. Emma Peel.

Well, I'm
Mrs. Emma Peel.

A friend of yours,
John Steed, sent it.

Steed?

A small, fat man
with a gray moustache.

Oh, of course.

Now I remember.
Thank you.

May I?

Well, what's in it?

- Don't you know?
- Should I?

- I imagined you would.
- Well, I don't.

A lobster.

How super!

Where shall I put it?
In here?

Well, I wouldn't,
not unless it's sleepy.

That's the bedroom.

The kitchen's
over there.

(chuckles)

How was he?

Steed?

- Oh, well...
- Good.

As can be expected.

Oh, of course.

Well, this won't get
the lobsters delivered.

Good day, Mrs. Peel.

Good day.

(telephone rings)

(ring ring)

(ring ring)

Emma Peel.

(upper-class accent)
Emma? Aha.

It's old lover boy himself.

I've just got back
from Karachi.

Be with you
in a couple of jiffs.

Hoity-toi!
(chuckles)

A couple of jiffs.

Lover boy.

Ooh.

Follow her.

Very well.
I'll tell him.

Thank you.

Lot 17 has been
safely stowed, sir.

No problems
with the shipment?

No, none at all.

Excellent. And what about
Operation Cast-Off?

Being attended to.

Mm-hmm. And so everyone
associated with the...

the fake Mrs. Peel?

Will be eliminated.

Beginning with
the theatrical agents.

Time for explanations,
isn't it?

Starting with the fact that
you're not Mrs. Emma Peel.

- Who are you?
- Wasn't I very convincing?

No. Who are you?

I'm Georgie Price-Jones.

Hello, Georgie.

Why are you trying to pass
yourself off as Mrs. Peel?

I was hired to.

Where's the real
Mrs. Peel?

I don't know.

I just answered
this advertisement

and got the job
to impersonate her.

And you were briefed
in here?

By a Mr. Lamb.

But where's he got to?

So that's where
he got to.

Was there anyone else here
when you were hired?

A couple
of advertising men.

Bates and Marshall.

(boiling)

What are you doing?

Looking for clues.

Oh, I see. Clues.

11:00 appointment
with Auntie.

Steed, listen to this.

S1 K9 K2 togg tbl.

Well?

Don't you see?
It's a code.

It seemed
very cluelike.

Bates and Marshall?

It's a check
made out to me.

The first half
of my fee.

Drawn against the account
of Barrett, Barrett & Wimpole.

Messrs. Barrett...

Barrett...

And Wimpole.

Six bodies in an hour
and 20 minutes.

What do you call that?

It's a good first act.

Where next?

I don't know.

Well, you disappoint me,
Miss Price-Jones.

Well,
there's always this.

S1 K9 K2 tog tbl AKC.

Togs. Clothes.

Theatrical costumiers.

Well, they supplied
the clothes and wigs.

The four
Jacques brothers.

John, Paul, George
and Fred.

Hello? Anyone home?

I've heard of history
repeating itself, but...

Losing your touch?

This one isn't dead.

Auntie...

Auntie did it.

Auntie?

Auntie who?

- You know what I think?
- No, what do you think?

Someone's kidnapped
your friend Mrs. Peel.

The same thought
had occurred to me.

- Great minds.
- Don't they?

Maybe they'll demand
extortion money.

I don't think it's that sort
of kidnapping. Dead end.

Well, there's always
S1 K2 K9.

Tbl tog AKC.

Now where is it?

I'm quite sure
I left it in here,

but just where?

Ah, there it is.

My knitting pattern.

I knew
I'd left it in here.

Oh, naughty boys.

Always up
to some game or other.

Madam, uh...

Naughty, naughty boys,

but so sweet,
don't you think?

Do you know
these gentlemen?

What, John, Paul,
George and Fred?

Well, of course,
I know them.

You can get up now.

They're my favorite nephews.

Absolutely my favorite.

- Nephews?
- Naturally.

And I like to think that
I am their favorite auntie.

It was so kind of you
to invite me home to tea.

Such a charming gesture.

One meets with them
so seldom these days.

But I do think I should
have had a word

with John, Paul, George
and Fred before I left.

They were resting.

It was their
express wish that they
remain undisturbed.

I understand.

Absolutely dead...

to the world.

It runs in the family,
you know.

Very heavy sleepers.

Madam...

You don't mind if I go on
with my knitting, do you?

About your nephews...

John, Paul,
George and Fred.

They're dear boys,
all of them.

Dear, dear boys.

I would love to do you
in poodle wool.

Did they have a visitor
this morning?

Oh, yes. Me.

I always call
on a Thursday, you see.

Oh, lovely.

Have you seen this before?

Oh, yes.

My dear man,
you're a member, too.

A member of what?

Oh, surely you must know.

The Arkwright
Knitting Circle.

This way, dear boy.

Look alive,
take a pair of fives.

Cast on and watch it grow.

Not too fast
and not too slow.

Knit along and away we go!

- Mr. Arkwright?
- Shh!

Good afternoon, madam.
It's lovely
to see you again.

I don't want to spoil
the concentration.

Quite.

Between now
and the tea interval
could be quite critical.

- Mr. Arkwright?
- Yes?

This is Mr. Steed.

How do you do?

He wants to know more
about our little circle.

Really? Thank you.

Now, do you knit?

Oh, you should,
you know.

Knitting is one
of the neglected arts.

It binds
the family together.

Brings peace
to the home. Listen.

The sheer serene sound
of clicking needles.

Excuse me.

(as a square dance caller)
Fingers nimble, fingers sprite.

Cast to the left,
cast to the right.

First one purl,
then one plain.

Then two purl
and back again!

(chuckles)

Do you know, I used to
come home from the office

rather tired and irritable.

Nowadays,
half an hour's knitting,

and what have I got?

Peace of mind, Mr. Steed,
peace of mind.

And I've really scooped
the pool, you know.

Here you see the cream
of the nation's knitters.

Now look there.
You see? Mrs. Bullsover.

Beautiful mover, isn't she?

Nothing forced.

And there,
Mrs. Grampian-Hardy.

Now, that's quite
a different technique.

Very sharp, very precise,

but joy, all joy.

Do you recognize these?

Do I? This is one
of our special 00s.

We had some stolen from
the storeroom last week.

Why would anyone
want to steal them?

It's industrial
sabotage.

Put the whole schedule
a week behind.

Any idea who it was?

No, but if I had, I'd...

Is there anything else,
Mr. Steed?

No. Thank you
for your help.

Well, don't forget
the motto of AKC.

When you're tired
and depressed,

spending more,
enjoying less,

knit along
with Arkwright.

Ivanoff.

I thought you were
still in Siberia.

I was resting.

Oh. Didn't know you were
interested in art.

Art Incorporated.

Oh, buying a painting
for a friend.

I see.

Not too aggressive
with the umbrella.

Spritely,
but not eager.

Eagerness,
untrustworthy.

It's almost
the next worst thing
to enthusiasm.

Ivanoff: Nice to see you
again, Steed.

Good day, then.

Ivanoff, haven't you
forgotten something?

Have I?

You haven't asked me
how Mrs. Peel is.

Why should I?

You usually do.

All right.
How is she, then?

She's away
for a few days.

I'm expecting
her back soon.

Around the block.

If you don't mind.

(footsteps)

Oh, good gracious!

It's Mr. Steed!

My dear fellow,
I had no idea.

Oh, dear.
It's all my fault.

You see, I heard someone
scuffling about,

and I'm... well, I...

We thought
you were a burglar.

Yes, stealing our knitting
needles again, you see?

Oh, he looks
very shaken.

Yes.

Do you think a woolen
muffler for his head?

No, thank you.
I'm quite all right.

Excuse me.

Well, my dear chap,
if I'd known it was you...

Payment will be made
in the usual way.

We want no mess,
no fuss.

Our deception
hasn't worked.

A man called Steed

came back a day or two
early from holiday.

So the fake Mrs. Peel

will have to be
eliminated.

"Turning the force of
the attacker to advantage,

"bringing the knee up into
the rib cage of the opponent

with a sickening... ".

Hmm. She must have some
very aggressive boyfriends.

"Take the right hand
of your opponent,

with the left elbow pointing
towards the ground."

Hmm.

"Take the right hand
of your opponent,

with the left elbow pointing
towards the ground."

Hmm.

"Should your opponent
attack from behind

"with a knife or gun,

"place your right hand
over your right shoulder

and grasp
the attacker's wrist."

Oh, my gosh!

Oh, my gosh!
Oh, my gosh!

Please let's not
do anything hasty!

Mr. Steed!

I thought
you were an old lady

with a bale
and knitting needles.

They do say
I take after Granny.

Are you all right?

I should have kept
my armored hat on.

Hey, what's this
about an old lady?

One attacked me
a few minutes ago.

Really, at her age, too.

She was old enough to be
someone's grandmother.

Or auntie.

Well?

It could be any one of them.

Got to get
a bit closer.

You can knit,
can't you?

I'll take size 93/4 in socks.

And, uh, nothing too garish.

(humming)

Good morning, sir.

Can I help you?

Possibly, possibly.

Yes.

Sir?

Definitely yes.

(inhales)
The air breathes well.

My nerve ends
are positively tingly.

I must strike up a rapport
with my surroundings

before I can possibly...

Yes, I can do business here.

Well, sir,
may I have your name?

My name...

is Wayne
Pennyfeather ffitch.

- Fitch.
- With two small fs.

Doubtless
you've heard of it.

Well, I...

Naturally.

A genuine Gibson!

Painted on a Thursday.

Only upstrokes.

Gibson never used
downstrokes on a Thursday.

Mr. ffitch,
how can we help you?

Your proud boast.

The unobtainable obtained.

Mr. ffitch, I'm so sorry,
but we only do business

with clients who are
personally recommended.

And I very much
look forward

to your next visit,
Your Ladyship.

Au revoir.

Goodbye.

Don't forget your handbag,
Lady Bracknell.

Thank you very much.
Goodbye.

Exactly what kind
of treasure

can we obtain for you,
Mr. ffitch?

That is not for your
Botticelli ears.

Perhaps someone
in the higher echelon...

I'll have to let you know.

- But surely...
- I'm sorry, Mr. ffitch,

but that is the way
we do business.

We'll be in touch.

As you say. Good day.

Good day.

Arkwright: Just cast on
and watch it grow.

Knit one, purl one,
and away we go.

Count to 10
and back again.

Row after row,
and on we go.

Nimble needles
to and fro.

Keep right on
to the end of the row.

Oh, dear, we are rusty,
aren't we?

Now don't rush it, dear.

Just remember,
it's all in the grip.

That's better.
Just one, two, three.

Just think of a waltz.

One, two, three.
One...

yes, that's
very promising.

Very nice natural
action there.

Very good indeed.

So is that.
Very good, yes. Mm.

Ah.

Grab that skein,
begin again.

Knitting's friendly.

It's smart, it's fun.

Hello, my dear.

And how are you today?

Hello.

I got it
to deal with my nephew.

Nephew?

The youngest one
on my brother's side.

This should keep him quiet,
don't you think?

Very.

I hope so.

You don't think
it's too old for him, do you?

He's only six.

I think it's lovely.

It's absolutely
splendid.

It's a wonderful gun.
(laughs)

ffitch, eh?

Wayne Pennyfeather.

Doesn't ring
any bells.

What did you
make of him?

He could be
our sort of client.

Come in here, will you?

We'll have him checked.

This man ffitch,

see what you can
find out about him.

A personal call,
I think, don't you?

He claims
to be an art expert.

(doorbell buzzes)

Georgie.

No luck
at the knitting circle?

Almost any of the old ladies
could be my old lady.

Where'd you get this?

Like it?

It's beautiful,
but where?

The National Gallery.
The "Doña Isabel." Goya.

You didn't steal it?

Of course not.
I only borrowed it.

They're in the habit
of lending priceless
paintings?

Only to true patrons.

(doorbell buzzes)

- Hide.
- Where?

I didn't think it
would take them long.

Good afternoon.

Good afternoon, madam.

I'm collecting
for the dogs' home.

A very worthy cause.
Please come in.

Our four-legged friends

need all the help
they can get.

Now, what will it be,
bones or cash?

Money, if you don't mind,
dear sir.

Excuse me.

I'll just see where
I've left my wallet.

Charming, isn't it?

Delightful.

Great affinity between
subject and artist.

A true rapport.

Adumbrated visually
in the harmony

of rose and black,
flesh and silk.

Luminous paint,
luminous glance.

Quite. Quite so.

Well, this should be
good for a couple
of cold noses.

Oh, thank you.
That's most kind of you.

Nonsense. Someone's
got to pay for
the postman's trousers.

Noble of you. Goodbye.

Goodbye.

Well, this business is
thick with old ladies.

Was that the one?

I didn't see her face.
I'm not sure.

One thing's clear.

- They've taken the hook.
- What next?

A little nefarious
skulduggery.

- Ooh!
- Alone.

Oh.

Going to a party.
Fancy dress.

(beeping)

(whirring)

(gun cocks)

Admiring the brushwork,
Mr. ffitch?

I thought you were
less likely to shoot me

standing in front
of a da Vinci.

How right you are.

May I take care
of that for you?

If you don't mind.

May I turn around now?

Surely.

I don't think I've had
the pleasure.

I am Auntie.

Gregorio Auntie.

How do you do?

I must admire your
persistence, Mr. ffitch,

and your initiative.

Couldn't keep away.

"The unobtainable obtained"?

It sounds an extravagant
claim, doesn't it?

But we are a unique
organization.

We actually can
get you anything,

anything at all.

At a price.

And sometimes the price
is very high.

Yes, I've had her
for three weeks now.

Rather reluctant
to let her go.

I should think the Louvre

also were reluctant
to let it go.

They don't know.

Put a very nice
reproduction in its place.

So that's
how you work it.

Whenever you steal
anything,

you replace it
with a replica.

That always seems to me

to be the fairest way,
don't you think?

But then I don't
have to tell you.

Your Goya,
the "Doña Isabel."

I was in the National
Gallery yesterday.

The reproduction you put
in its place, hmm.

- You like it?
- I do. I do indeed.

And if I might
inquire, who...

A jolly little
Flemish painter.

Goya is a specialty
of his.

I'll give you
his address.

I'm very impressed
with your connections.

And I'm very impressed

with your
intelligence system

that you knew I had.

Can I offer you a brandy?

(ting)

From the Tower of London.

A votre santé.

A la votre.

Well, now, Mr. ffitch,
what can I get for you?

Anything at all,
you say?

No task is too formidable.

Do you know what my staff are
engaged upon at the moment?

Working out ways to transport
the Eiffel Tower.

Where to?

A Texas millionaire
has taken a fancy for it.

He wants to put it down
amongst his oil derricks.

Isn't that sweet?

It must present
difficulties.

Acquiring it, no.

We have already
arranged that.

No, the main problem is
smuggling it out of Paris.

A human being
would be easier.

You have dealt
in human beings?

The odd diplomat,

the occasional
nuclear scientist, yes.

There is a small market
for them, a demand.

Is it a human being you
wish us to acquire for you?

A woman.

Her mind...
Yes, her mind...

Would be of
the utmost value to me.

And the lady's name?

Peel. Mrs. Emma Peel.

Not a terribly good
brandy, is it?

I'm afraid you're 10 days
too late, Mr. ffitch.

We've already acquired
Mrs. Peel for another client.

- She's our Lot 17.
- Ivanoff.

I never divulge
the names of clients.

Whatever he's offered you,
I'll double it.

- I'm sorry.
- Treble it.

I'm tempted, very tempted.

Well, then?

But I'm afraid
I must refuse.

After all, I have a certain
reputation, Mr. ffitch.

I'm afraid that Mrs. Peel
is not for sale.

On the other hand,
if I could interest you

in a first folio of "Hamlet"

acquired from the British
Museum two nights ago?

I hate to tell you.
A reproduction.

You don't mean...

I have the original
at home.

Maybe in a part exchange
deal for Mrs. Peel.

No, I'm sorry.
Mrs. Peel is not for sale,

but perhaps you and I can do
business some other time.

I hope so.

By the way, where
are you holding her?

I'm very happy to have made
your acquaintance, Mr. ffitch.

Good night.

Good night.

And how is Lot 17 tonight?

Like to spread your wings
and fly, would you?

Do have some grapes.

Feeding me up?

No, no, no.

I find you perfectly
adequate as you are.

And your popularity
is increasing.

That's encouraging.

First Ivanoff
and now Mr. ffitch.

- Ffitch?
- Mm.

With two small fs.
You know him?

No, I don't know him.

Charming fellow.

And that
increasing rarity,

a real
English gentleman.

You're sure
you don't know him?

Yes, I'm sure.

I was just thinking.

You know, if I had
a vat in here,

I might tread these grapes.

Ferment my own wine.

(chuckles)

I regret you will not be
here long enough for that.

A pity, because I enjoy
beautiful things,

and you are
very beautiful.

Well, a day or so more
and you'll be gone.

Gone where?

That depends
upon Ivanoff.

You must have a very
remarkable mind, Mrs. Peel,

for him to pay
so much for you.

You have many secrets?

No matter.
That is Ivanoff's problem.

But I do hope he treats you
with proper consideration.

Although I fear,
knowing his methods,

that that will not be
the case.

I'm afraid that
where you're going,

this cage will seem
like a paradise.

What next?

We're going to sell you
to the enemy.

Do what?

What's so special about
this Mrs. Emma Peel?

You'd think
she was Madame Curie

and half a dozen others
all rolled into one.

Her vital statistics.

The IQ variety.
Hold that.

She knows about ciphers,
scented fuels, cybernetics,

and that's what Ivanoff
is interested in.

Well, it so happened

that I nearly passed
through college.

I was going
to specialize in...

Excuse me.

What are you doing?
Hey!

(car horn blares)

(muffled)
Charming.

(music plays
on phonograph)

(knock on door)

(music stops)

Who's there?

Special delivery.
Perishables.

- Pay the driver.
- Now?

The meter's ticking over.

And a tip?

Of course.

- Well, shouldn't I wait?
- What?

You might need
some help.

What'd you say?

Forget it.

Where is she?

(groans) Who?

Mrs. Peel.
Where is she?

I don't know!

Auntie's got her,
hasn't he?

Where's he keeping her?

Honestly, I don't know.

Auntie wouldn't tell me.

What price
is he asking for her?

140,000 American dollars.

It's over here
in the briefcase.

We may as well
take him with us.

If he moves,
point that at him,

at his second button.

Second from the top
or the bottom?

Suit yourself.

Steed here. I want you
to pick up a parcel.

Yes, I'm with it now.
What?

Hush it up? Of course
not hush it up.

Give it
maximum publicity.

Well, well, well.

You have to admire
his technique.

Technique?

Ffitch.
This is his handiwork.

- Really?
- Mm-hmm.

When you're in the market
for a certain product

and you know someone else
is after it also,

you do one of two things.

You outbid your opponent

or you eliminate him
from the contest.

Do you think ffitch
will get Mrs. Peel?

Well, it's what he wants.

But will he get her?

No, I don't think so.

His money's as good
as anybody else's.

Well, then we must make him
prove it, mustn't we?

How?

Put her up for auction.

I'll circulate
the details right away.

Particular attention
to the Eastern Bloc.

Do you think Ivanoff
will talk?

Hmm?

(footsteps)

Guard: Visitor
for you, Ivanoff.

It's your mother.

Mother?

They're treating you
well, son?

I've told them nothing!

It's Steed you want!

It's all his doing,
not mine!

Honestly, it's Steed!

I promise
you can trust me!

Please!

(gasp)

Auctioneer: I say it once,
I say it twice.

Oh, come now, gentlemen.

It's cheap at the price.

One million five.

Any advance
on one million five?

One million five
against you, sir.

One million five.

Any advance
on one million five?

Quite splendid,
isn't it?

A splendid example

of filthy, decadent
Western art.

One million six.

One million six.

Any advance
on one million six?

No?

Sold to the gentleman
over there.

I shall have it delivered
to your hotel, sir.

Oh, I beg your pardon,
your submarine, of course.

And now the last item
this afternoon,

and a very unusual one.

Marked in your catalogs
as Lot 17,

Mrs. Emma Peel,

a very desirable acquisition.

I understand

that she carries
most of the disposition

of Western defense bases
in her head,

is a cipher expert
of no mean ability,

and would be
a splendid addition

to any intelligence system
anywhere in the world.

I must make it quite
clear, however,

that I cannot guarantee that
she will betray her secrets.

That is up
to the purchaser.

But she does carry
some very special ones,

and so I must ask
that the bidding begin

at the reserve price
of £50,000.

That's
90,000 rubles.

Thank you.

I open the bidding.
50,000.

60.

70.

I hear 80.

90.

£90,000 I am bid.

£90,000.
Oh, come now, gentlemen.

It's cheap at the price.

Observe this talented lady.

She looks
a bit broody.

Can't you have her
move about a bit?

Certainly.

That's better.

I like to see
what I'm buying.

£100,000.

- Russian: 110.
- Steed: And 11.

- 12.
- 14.

- 15.
- 16.

17.

200,000.

Think of the national
budget, old boy.

You'll have to cut down
on the vodka.

£200,000 I'm bid.

£200,000

for this outstanding example

of British pulchritude
and learning.

200,000, I say it once...

I say it twice...

Sold to Mr. Wayne
Pennyfeather ffitch.

Well, Mr. ffitch, your
persistence is rewarded.

When can I collect?

Immediately.

Lot 17 is in
our secret store.

Far from here?

You'll see.

Steed!

Steed? Steed!

- Steed!
- Steed!

Steed! Destroy Lot 17!
Destroy... aah!

Ow!

Follow her!

Very enigmatic.

She went that way!

And along again
to the end of the row.

A do-si-do.

I won't destroy
their concentration.

Don't worry.

Oh! Stop! Stop it!

Hey!

- Where is she?
- Down there.

Mr. Steed,
I really must...

Quite unavoidable,
I assure you.

What are they knitting?

A bungalow.

Now calm down, ladies,
calm down.

And no cracks, please,

about birds
in gilded cages.

As if I would.

Are you all right?

We've been so worried
about you.

Oh, Mrs. Emma Peel,
meet Mrs. Emma Peel.

How do you do?

(honk honk)

(honk)

Charming lady.

I wonder if
she's going our way.

(theme music)