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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,633 --> 00:00:07,466 Do you know the speech? I know the gist of it. 2 00:00:07,533 --> 00:00:09,199 You memorize entire homilies. 3 00:00:09,266 --> 00:00:13,233 Homilies are poetry, a plea before the city council is demeaning. 4 00:00:17,633 --> 00:00:20,333 Esteemed councilmen, in a few days, 5 00:00:20,399 --> 00:00:22,867 St. Nicholas Church will be torn down. 6 00:00:22,933 --> 00:00:25,066 I have come before you for the fourth time 7 00:00:25,132 --> 00:00:26,633 to beg for your condescension. 8 00:00:26,700 --> 00:00:27,933 Consideration. 9 00:00:27,999 --> 00:00:29,399 Which you have never shown before. 10 00:00:29,466 --> 00:00:30,900 To block the sale of the church. 11 00:00:30,967 --> 00:00:32,999 Because we're not just losing a building. 12 00:00:33,066 --> 00:00:35,333 We're losing a sacrament. 13 00:00:35,399 --> 00:00:39,032 The communion with our neighbors is our mass. 14 00:00:39,766 --> 00:00:41,132 Not bad, huh? 15 00:00:42,566 --> 00:00:45,700 Help! Somebody help! 16 00:00:45,766 --> 00:00:47,433 Somebody, please. 17 00:00:50,900 --> 00:00:52,700 Father Paul! 18 00:00:54,666 --> 00:00:55,800 Father Paul. 19 00:00:57,132 --> 00:00:59,399 We need an ambulance. Please send an ambulance. 20 00:01:00,040 --> 00:01:05,140 Subtitles edited by Ehhhhtozebec 21 00:01:06,566 --> 00:01:08,967 Hey, Sophie's here, man. What do I tell her? 22 00:01:09,032 --> 00:01:10,900 Anything but the truth. 23 00:01:11,867 --> 00:01:13,766 Hey. Hey. 24 00:01:13,833 --> 00:01:16,333 Thank you so much for coming to my play last night. 25 00:01:16,399 --> 00:01:18,633 Oh... Last night was awesome. 26 00:01:18,700 --> 00:01:21,466 Oh, thanks, Parker. 27 00:01:21,533 --> 00:01:23,433 Yeah. It was like a horror movie. 28 00:01:23,500 --> 00:01:26,233 Attention must be paid. 29 00:01:29,500 --> 00:01:32,466 I mean, you're not the first person I would think of 30 00:01:32,533 --> 00:01:36,566 to play Willy Lowman, but you worked it out. 31 00:01:36,633 --> 00:01:38,166 Yeah. 32 00:01:38,233 --> 00:01:39,933 Oh! 33 00:01:43,500 --> 00:01:45,266 That was the worst night of my life. 34 00:01:45,333 --> 00:01:48,166 Come on, man. You've been in worse situations. 35 00:01:57,566 --> 00:01:59,666 No. No, that was the worst. 36 00:02:02,633 --> 00:02:03,733 Mmm. 37 00:02:05,132 --> 00:02:06,766 How great were you? 38 00:02:06,833 --> 00:02:09,533 I mean, they ought to call it Death of a Saleswoman. 39 00:02:09,600 --> 00:02:13,500 What a great commentary on the glass ceiling for women in corporate America. 40 00:02:13,566 --> 00:02:16,999 Nate, I played the part as a man. 41 00:02:18,233 --> 00:02:20,933 Yes. And brilliantly. 42 00:02:23,700 --> 00:02:24,933 Thanks. 43 00:02:26,533 --> 00:02:28,933 I mean, you were... Huh? 44 00:02:30,166 --> 00:02:31,999 Hold on. I have to... 45 00:02:34,967 --> 00:02:36,333 Hi, Maggie? 46 00:02:37,199 --> 00:02:39,433 Is everything okay? When? 47 00:02:39,500 --> 00:02:41,566 Who's Maggie? 48 00:02:41,633 --> 00:02:43,633 Nate's ex wife. 49 00:02:50,833 --> 00:02:52,967 Hey. 50 00:02:53,032 --> 00:02:56,833 If I thought I'd get you to visit I'd have gotten my ribs kicked in a little sooner. 51 00:02:56,900 --> 00:02:58,132 How you doing, Paul? 52 00:02:58,199 --> 00:02:59,900 I got my shots in. 53 00:02:59,967 --> 00:03:02,933 I popped the first guy in the shoulder before I blacked out. 54 00:03:02,999 --> 00:03:06,466 Yeah. I know. I read the police report. 55 00:03:06,533 --> 00:03:07,700 You read the police report. 56 00:03:07,766 --> 00:03:09,299 I do that. 57 00:03:10,500 --> 00:03:13,500 You talk to Maggie? 58 00:03:13,566 --> 00:03:17,032 Do you think it was a coincidence that you got attacked on your way 59 00:03:17,099 --> 00:03:19,867 to beg the city council to save your church? 60 00:03:19,933 --> 00:03:23,299 No, I don't. You talk to Maggie a lot? 61 00:03:23,366 --> 00:03:27,333 When is the sale final on the church? 62 00:03:27,399 --> 00:03:29,833 Escrow closes Monday, why? 63 00:03:29,900 --> 00:03:33,333 Code blue, pediatrics. Code blue. 64 00:03:38,333 --> 00:03:40,266 I know hospitals are tough for you. 65 00:03:42,099 --> 00:03:44,833 Paul, have you tried legal action? I mean, maybe an injunction would... 66 00:03:44,900 --> 00:03:46,399 With what money? 67 00:03:46,466 --> 00:03:49,233 I thought it was God's plan for me to save the church, Nate. 68 00:03:49,299 --> 00:03:51,600 I was wrong. 69 00:03:51,666 --> 00:03:55,333 But we're going to have one last mass on Sunday, and I plan to make the most of it. 70 00:03:55,399 --> 00:03:58,066 You should be there. 71 00:03:58,132 --> 00:04:02,032 It's not going to be your last mass, Paul. 72 00:04:02,099 --> 00:04:04,633 Nate, what are you going to do? Nate. 73 00:04:07,800 --> 00:04:12,366 I'll just maybe move God's plans along. 74 00:04:15,867 --> 00:04:18,333 That's St. Nicholas? Yeah. 75 00:04:18,399 --> 00:04:19,700 Santa Claus has a church? 76 00:04:19,766 --> 00:04:21,166 It's not Santa Claus. 77 00:04:21,233 --> 00:04:23,733 I know this is not our usual kind of case, I realize. 78 00:04:23,800 --> 00:04:26,766 But before you say anything, Paul is an old friend of mine, 79 00:04:26,833 --> 00:04:29,633 and he has helped the poor parishes more than you could ever... 80 00:04:29,700 --> 00:04:32,766 Nate, Nate, Nate. We're taking the case. 81 00:04:34,066 --> 00:04:35,132 Oh. 82 00:04:35,199 --> 00:04:36,299 Yeah. 83 00:04:36,366 --> 00:04:37,533 Oh. 84 00:04:37,600 --> 00:04:41,099 Great. Good. Oh, all right. 85 00:04:41,166 --> 00:04:44,933 Well, this is obviously a strong arm maneuver that's happened here, 86 00:04:44,999 --> 00:04:48,433 get rid of the activist priest and the sale closes on Monday. 87 00:04:48,500 --> 00:04:50,199 Do we know anything about who bought the church? 88 00:04:50,266 --> 00:04:51,999 The sign outside said it was sold to Kennedy Corp. 89 00:04:52,066 --> 00:04:55,867 Now, Kennedy Corp is a wholly owned subsidiary of STB International, 90 00:04:55,933 --> 00:04:58,566 which is the parent company of Acai Diversified, 91 00:04:58,633 --> 00:05:01,867 which is a US subsidiary of Kennedy Corp. 92 00:05:01,933 --> 00:05:04,566 That is a lot of trouble to go to for buying an old church. 93 00:05:04,633 --> 00:05:06,766 Yeah. So, Kennedy Corp, that's obviously the front. 94 00:05:06,833 --> 00:05:08,967 Parker, check all the addresses for the realty companies. 95 00:05:09,032 --> 00:05:12,366 Eliot, Hardison, find the local talent that attacked Paul. 96 00:05:12,433 --> 00:05:14,333 He messed up one of their shoulders, if that helps. 97 00:05:14,399 --> 00:05:17,333 No, no. I don't do gangs. Come on. 98 00:05:17,399 --> 00:05:19,967 What? What did he... Get you out in some fresh air, get off the computer. 99 00:05:20,032 --> 00:05:21,600 I rappel. Come on! 100 00:05:21,666 --> 00:05:23,833 Did no one see me rappel? 101 00:05:24,600 --> 00:05:26,266 I heard about it. 102 00:05:48,032 --> 00:05:49,867 You going to be okay? 103 00:05:56,999 --> 00:05:59,533 He's an old friend. I owe him. 104 00:06:04,333 --> 00:06:06,800 You think that we're just going to walk into some random tunnel 105 00:06:06,867 --> 00:06:10,199 and find some cholos just all yoked up. You know? 106 00:06:10,266 --> 00:06:13,500 Hardison. Yo, homes, let me fix my do-rag. 107 00:06:13,566 --> 00:06:14,666 Just... What? 108 00:06:14,733 --> 00:06:15,933 Listen. 109 00:06:17,433 --> 00:06:20,132 Boys, we don't want any trouble. 110 00:06:21,066 --> 00:06:23,466 All right. We just want some answers. 111 00:06:23,533 --> 00:06:25,266 How's this answer? 112 00:06:29,366 --> 00:06:32,700 Gentlemen, I'm asking about one of your colleagues. 113 00:06:32,766 --> 00:06:35,132 Somebody who rolled a priest. Who was it? 114 00:06:38,867 --> 00:06:40,700 You seeing this, Hardison? 115 00:06:40,766 --> 00:06:42,600 Yeah. The situation has my attention, yes. 116 00:06:42,666 --> 00:06:44,600 You see, that's why I don't like guns. 117 00:06:44,666 --> 00:06:47,199 They have a specific range of efficacy. 118 00:06:47,266 --> 00:06:49,867 See, most guys make one mistake. 119 00:06:51,333 --> 00:06:53,366 They get too close. 120 00:06:59,900 --> 00:07:04,199 Who rolled a priest? 121 00:07:04,266 --> 00:07:07,867 We didn't beat up no priest. We're not monsters. 122 00:07:13,299 --> 00:07:16,533 Dislocated shoulder's a bitch. 123 00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:18,433 Priest gave him that. 124 00:07:19,999 --> 00:07:21,800 You beat up a priest? 125 00:07:23,333 --> 00:07:24,766 Do you mind? 126 00:07:24,833 --> 00:07:26,266 Be my guest. 127 00:07:29,900 --> 00:07:32,733 You got a long penance ahead of you. 128 00:07:32,800 --> 00:07:35,633 Start by answering the man's questions. 129 00:07:35,700 --> 00:07:37,099 Now! 130 00:07:37,166 --> 00:07:38,266 Who hired you? I don't know. 131 00:07:38,333 --> 00:07:39,900 I got a call on my cell with an offer, 132 00:07:39,967 --> 00:07:42,166 and I called them back after the job was done. 133 00:07:42,233 --> 00:07:45,166 He paid me. That's all I know. I swear. 134 00:07:45,233 --> 00:07:46,867 You got a number? 135 00:07:50,967 --> 00:07:52,166 Can you do something with that? 136 00:07:52,233 --> 00:07:54,633 Seven digits. I could find you on Mars. 137 00:07:54,700 --> 00:07:59,900 Gentlemen, I'll leave you to your internal affairs. Come on. 138 00:07:59,967 --> 00:08:02,867 How about that, man? You see me? 139 00:08:02,933 --> 00:08:04,566 He was injured. 140 00:08:04,633 --> 00:08:07,333 Well, somebody got to fight the injured. Shoot. That's my niche. 141 00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:12,933 When I ran a back trace on the gang banger's car 142 00:08:12,999 --> 00:08:15,633 it routed through this dude's number from a payphone. 143 00:08:15,700 --> 00:08:16,733 So, we got nothing. 144 00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:18,199 Now, hold on. Hold on. 145 00:08:18,266 --> 00:08:20,366 The pay phone is located here. 146 00:08:20,433 --> 00:08:24,233 The Residences at 8th, luxury condos, brought to you by Andrew Grant. 147 00:08:24,299 --> 00:08:27,199 Yeah. I know this guy. He built the Meadow Mall on the west side, 148 00:08:27,266 --> 00:08:30,166 you know, the one with the monorail. 149 00:08:30,233 --> 00:08:32,600 Now, this guy doesn't happen to own any of the shell companies 150 00:08:32,666 --> 00:08:34,366 that bought the church, does he? 151 00:08:34,433 --> 00:08:38,600 Well, I can't prove that, but let's just put it this way. 152 00:08:38,666 --> 00:08:41,666 Those shell companies have their daddy's lying eyes. 153 00:08:41,733 --> 00:08:43,566 All right. What do we know about this Grant guy? 154 00:08:43,633 --> 00:08:45,533 Well, the man's a media whore. 155 00:08:45,600 --> 00:08:48,566 He went through like nine publicists last year alone. 156 00:08:48,633 --> 00:08:51,433 He's cutting the ribbon on this place tomorrow. 157 00:08:51,500 --> 00:08:55,299 Also, Grant survived a helicopter crash last year. 158 00:08:55,366 --> 00:08:57,199 Checked out his pharmacy account. 159 00:08:57,266 --> 00:09:01,633 The man pops anti-anxiety pills like Pez. 160 00:09:01,700 --> 00:09:06,466 Well, publicists are like priests. You gotta tell them all your secrets, 161 00:09:06,533 --> 00:09:09,800 so that's our way in. The question is how. 162 00:09:09,867 --> 00:09:12,366 What are you thinking? 163 00:09:12,433 --> 00:09:18,433 This guy beat up a priest, we're not going easy on him. 164 00:09:18,500 --> 00:09:20,399 I got a dozen reporters waiting for me downstairs, 165 00:09:20,466 --> 00:09:23,166 and the backdrop for my ribbon cutting is scaffolding? 166 00:09:23,233 --> 00:09:24,933 It was a miscommunication. 167 00:09:24,999 --> 00:09:26,867 Isn't that what I pay you for, Tomas? 168 00:09:26,933 --> 00:09:28,533 To communicate? 169 00:09:28,600 --> 00:09:30,266 Stop screwing up. 170 00:09:32,399 --> 00:09:35,366 Mr. Grant. Kristi Connelly. 171 00:09:35,433 --> 00:09:36,967 I'm a reporter with The Ledger. 172 00:09:37,032 --> 00:09:39,466 I was wondering if I could ask you a few questions. 173 00:09:39,533 --> 00:09:41,366 Miss Connelly, I don't know how you got up here, 174 00:09:41,433 --> 00:09:43,366 but the press conference is down in the lobby. 175 00:09:43,433 --> 00:09:45,233 It starts in 10 minutes. No, no. I understand. 176 00:09:45,299 --> 00:09:47,800 I just wondered if I could have a moment of your time. Where's the foreman? 177 00:09:47,867 --> 00:09:49,366 Franco! 178 00:09:50,733 --> 00:09:53,032 Willy Wonka's here. 179 00:09:53,099 --> 00:09:55,299 Good. His ride's almost here. 180 00:10:00,032 --> 00:10:04,700 Okay. Showtime. All right. Did you remember the big scissors this time? 181 00:10:04,766 --> 00:10:06,099 Did you remember them? 182 00:10:07,733 --> 00:10:09,900 Oh, my God. Are you okay? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 183 00:10:09,967 --> 00:10:11,266 So sorry. Watch where you're going. 184 00:10:11,333 --> 00:10:12,833 I didn't mean to do that. That's okay. It's all right. 185 00:10:12,900 --> 00:10:15,933 Just be more careful next time, baby, okay. 186 00:10:20,166 --> 00:10:22,600 God, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry, man. 187 00:10:24,333 --> 00:10:25,800 What the hell are you doing? 188 00:10:25,867 --> 00:10:27,433 I had a little tequila last night, I'm sorry about that. 189 00:10:27,500 --> 00:10:29,600 Why don't you focus, Cuervo? All right? 190 00:10:29,666 --> 00:10:31,166 I feel really bad about that. 191 00:10:31,233 --> 00:10:32,733 You know what? Feel bad, all right? 192 00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:34,366 Oh! Thanks. 193 00:10:59,933 --> 00:11:01,600 I don't believe it! 194 00:11:05,399 --> 00:11:07,233 They're fixing up this lift, right? 195 00:11:07,299 --> 00:11:09,433 There's probably a few bugs to work out. 196 00:11:09,500 --> 00:11:12,466 Unacceptable. I'm calling the contractor. 197 00:11:12,533 --> 00:11:14,099 Oh, seriously? No signal. 198 00:11:23,032 --> 00:11:25,867 Okay. That's weird. 199 00:11:27,032 --> 00:11:28,166 Yeah. 200 00:11:34,399 --> 00:11:37,066 I'm not crazy about heights. 201 00:11:39,066 --> 00:11:40,833 Or enclosed spaces. 202 00:11:49,099 --> 00:11:51,533 What is that you just took? 203 00:11:51,600 --> 00:11:52,766 Xanax. 204 00:11:54,166 --> 00:11:55,933 For my nerves. 205 00:11:55,999 --> 00:12:00,399 Actually, caffeine with a dash of dextroamphetamine. 206 00:12:06,967 --> 00:12:11,500 God, are you getting any air at all? Down there I swear... 207 00:12:11,566 --> 00:12:15,833 God, I think they've sucked all the oxygen out of here to torture me. 208 00:12:15,900 --> 00:12:19,600 It's like the witch's oven in Hansel and Gretel or something. 209 00:12:19,666 --> 00:12:22,666 Just roasting us like a turkey. 210 00:12:24,299 --> 00:12:26,633 You gave him speed? 211 00:12:26,700 --> 00:12:28,500 He beat up a priest. 212 00:12:33,233 --> 00:12:36,266 Get me out of here! 213 00:12:36,333 --> 00:12:41,366 For God's sake. Can anybody hear me? 214 00:12:41,433 --> 00:12:43,500 I'm going to fire every one of you, 215 00:12:43,566 --> 00:12:47,633 every single one of you. You are so fired! 216 00:12:48,999 --> 00:12:51,933 Mr. Grant. Is anybody even listening? 217 00:12:51,999 --> 00:12:57,566 Mr. Grant, the press. They're still down there. 218 00:12:57,633 --> 00:13:00,366 We've only been up here for half an hour. 219 00:13:03,999 --> 00:13:08,399 Oh, God. Oh, God. They're going to have a field day with me. I mean, look... 220 00:13:08,466 --> 00:13:09,933 Send us home. 221 00:13:14,266 --> 00:13:18,600 See? No, no, no. I can't. I can't. 222 00:13:18,666 --> 00:13:22,633 You gotta stand up and pick me up. Yes. Yes, trust me. Come on. 223 00:13:22,700 --> 00:13:24,733 What? What? Trust me. 224 00:13:24,800 --> 00:13:28,299 Trust me and pick me up. 225 00:13:28,366 --> 00:13:31,299 Someone get me out of this thing! 226 00:13:32,600 --> 00:13:34,666 Someone get these doors open. 227 00:13:34,733 --> 00:13:37,466 Thank God. Oh, thank God. 228 00:13:37,533 --> 00:13:41,766 She fainted. She fainted. Move out of the way, would you? 229 00:13:41,833 --> 00:13:45,633 This woman needs medical attention. Okay. Come on. Come on. 230 00:13:45,700 --> 00:13:49,166 Come on. You'll be okay. Stay with me, sweetheart. Stay with me. 231 00:13:49,233 --> 00:13:51,333 Get some... Would you get... 232 00:13:53,999 --> 00:13:56,333 Okay. Okay, sweetheart. Okay. 233 00:13:56,399 --> 00:14:00,766 You'll be okay. Ms. Connelly, you just got yourself an interview. 234 00:14:00,833 --> 00:14:03,466 Okay, back off. No more pictures, okay? 235 00:14:05,333 --> 00:14:08,766 So, what would you say has been the key to your... 236 00:14:08,833 --> 00:14:11,900 Oh, thanks. Meteoric rise? 237 00:14:11,967 --> 00:14:14,999 An appetite for risk, hard work, bit of luck here and there? 238 00:14:15,066 --> 00:14:16,967 This interview is over. 239 00:14:18,766 --> 00:14:20,166 I'm sorry? 240 00:14:20,233 --> 00:14:23,533 Kristi, how did you know what to do in there? 241 00:14:23,600 --> 00:14:25,433 Oh, that. I'm a reporter. 242 00:14:25,500 --> 00:14:28,233 You have to understand reporters. We're lazy by nature. 243 00:14:28,299 --> 00:14:30,266 All we want is a story, a narrative, 244 00:14:30,333 --> 00:14:32,933 and if you don't like the story they're writing, just give them a new one. 245 00:14:32,999 --> 00:14:35,032 They'll thank you for it. 246 00:14:35,099 --> 00:14:37,633 I don't want you to do a story on me. 247 00:14:38,399 --> 00:14:39,733 I don't understand. 248 00:14:39,800 --> 00:14:44,132 I want you to make sure everyone else is doing a story on me. 249 00:14:44,199 --> 00:14:46,666 I saw the way you handled the press back there. 250 00:14:46,733 --> 00:14:49,132 I want you to be my new publicist. 251 00:14:51,266 --> 00:14:55,733 I don't know what to say except, when can I start? 252 00:14:56,900 --> 00:14:58,166 How about tomorrow? 253 00:14:58,233 --> 00:15:01,633 Of course, if I'm going to be your publicist, Andy, 254 00:15:01,700 --> 00:15:03,800 I'm going to need complete access to your business. 255 00:15:03,867 --> 00:15:06,766 There can't be any secrets between us, none. 256 00:15:11,833 --> 00:15:13,666 Let me show you something. 257 00:15:16,433 --> 00:15:18,766 He's building another mall on the site of the church. 258 00:15:18,833 --> 00:15:21,867 It's not even a mall. It's a bloody lifestyle center. 259 00:15:21,933 --> 00:15:23,733 Eat, work, shop, play, all in one place. 260 00:15:23,800 --> 00:15:25,399 I don't like this guy. I hate him. 261 00:15:25,466 --> 00:15:28,132 He doesn't want the closing of the church connected to him. 262 00:15:28,199 --> 00:15:31,500 But he's got the city council in his pocket and got the land for a song. 263 00:15:31,566 --> 00:15:33,533 Once this deal closes, he's free and clear. 264 00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:36,433 By the time they break ground on this mall, he'll be untouchable. 265 00:15:36,500 --> 00:15:40,766 Forget St. Nick. We'd be better off with the patron saint of lost causes. 266 00:15:40,833 --> 00:15:42,500 No, no. He trusts you. You can hook him. 267 00:15:42,566 --> 00:15:44,967 Yeah, I know I can, Nate, but there's no time. 268 00:15:45,032 --> 00:15:48,399 I mean, we need a long con for this job, right? 269 00:15:48,466 --> 00:15:50,700 In three days he owns that church. 270 00:15:50,766 --> 00:15:53,533 Right, so we gotta hit him hard now and indirectly, you know, stall the closing, 271 00:15:53,600 --> 00:15:57,266 and buy enough time to bring him in for a longer game. 272 00:15:57,333 --> 00:15:59,299 You really think he's going to fall for that? 273 00:15:59,366 --> 00:16:01,600 This guy, I gotta be honest with you, 274 00:16:01,666 --> 00:16:04,600 we're going to need a miracle to save this church. 275 00:16:04,666 --> 00:16:07,299 So, let's go steal ourselves a miracle. 276 00:16:17,032 --> 00:16:19,600 So, the Catholic Church defines a miracle as the work of God, 277 00:16:19,666 --> 00:16:25,166 usually through the prayers and intercessions of a saint for some specific purpose, 278 00:16:25,233 --> 00:16:29,199 frequently the conversion of the unbelieving. 279 00:16:29,266 --> 00:16:30,399 How do you know all this stuff? 280 00:16:30,466 --> 00:16:32,566 I went to school with Father Paul. 281 00:16:34,500 --> 00:16:37,500 To seminary school. 282 00:16:37,566 --> 00:16:41,766 So, you dropped out of priest school to become an insurance cop? 283 00:16:41,833 --> 00:16:45,466 Now you're a leader of a band of thieves. Nice. 284 00:16:45,533 --> 00:16:49,066 You're a Catholic who wants to fake a miracle. 285 00:16:49,132 --> 00:16:51,967 I'm pretty sure that puts us in mortal sin territory. 286 00:16:52,032 --> 00:16:53,733 So, what? Now you're religious, too? 287 00:16:53,800 --> 00:16:55,766 No. I'm not denominational, 288 00:16:55,833 --> 00:16:58,700 it's just I never do anything my nana said don't do. 289 00:16:58,766 --> 00:17:01,833 This, what we doing, it just don't seem right. 290 00:17:01,900 --> 00:17:03,566 What doesn't seem right? Let me get this straight. 291 00:17:03,633 --> 00:17:05,399 We're trying to save a church, right? 292 00:17:05,466 --> 00:17:08,466 So, faking a miracle to me seems like the quickest way to do that. 293 00:17:08,533 --> 00:17:12,066 Even Andrew Grant's not going to build a mall on a holy site. 294 00:17:12,132 --> 00:17:14,433 Right. So, we need three things. We need a miracle, 295 00:17:14,500 --> 00:17:17,433 we need publicity, and we need to keep Father Paul out of the way. 296 00:17:17,500 --> 00:17:21,433 He can't be involved in this at all. 297 00:17:21,500 --> 00:17:26,166 Reporters follow Grant around in packs. Let's use him as bait. 298 00:17:26,233 --> 00:17:28,733 Use his own publicity to wreck his project. 299 00:17:30,900 --> 00:17:32,733 It's elegant. 300 00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:35,900 Okay. Parker, I need you to go to the hospital 301 00:17:35,967 --> 00:17:38,533 and keep Father Paul there, no matter what, up to a point. 302 00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:40,132 But keep him in the hospital. 303 00:17:40,199 --> 00:17:42,533 Eliot, you're the retrieval specialist. Give Hardison anything he needs. 304 00:17:42,600 --> 00:17:44,666 Long as I don't have to do anything immoral. 305 00:17:44,733 --> 00:17:49,466 No, absolutely not. No. Just need you to figure out how to fake a miracle. 306 00:17:53,333 --> 00:17:55,132 We all going to hell. 307 00:17:58,633 --> 00:18:00,399 You know I'm getting out of here in a couple of hours. 308 00:18:00,466 --> 00:18:03,933 Yeah. It's just a few last tests to be on the safe side. 309 00:18:14,266 --> 00:18:15,867 You leak this? 310 00:18:15,933 --> 00:18:16,900 They're calling for his head. 311 00:18:16,967 --> 00:18:20,266 It's a PR nightmare. Trust me. 312 00:18:20,333 --> 00:18:26,233 He's rattled, vulnerable, just right for me to kiss and make boo boo better. 313 00:18:29,533 --> 00:18:32,233 He'll be a minute. It's busy today. 314 00:18:32,299 --> 00:18:36,967 Certainly is. So, what's your take on all of this? 315 00:18:37,032 --> 00:18:40,833 The new mall? I mean, lifestyle center? 316 00:18:40,900 --> 00:18:43,166 We're building right around where I grew up. 317 00:18:43,233 --> 00:18:45,766 I figured it'd sweep out the gangs. 318 00:18:45,833 --> 00:18:48,032 Good on you. You're a company man. 319 00:18:48,099 --> 00:18:49,999 Yes, ma'am. Thank you for your opinion. 320 00:18:50,066 --> 00:18:54,800 Okay. I just received a threatening phone call from a nun. 321 00:18:54,867 --> 00:18:57,867 Well, Mr. Grant, the problem is the reporters have their story. 322 00:18:57,933 --> 00:18:59,867 Yeah. Andrew Grant, neighborhood wrecker. 323 00:18:59,933 --> 00:19:01,032 Like there's even a neighborhood there. 324 00:19:01,099 --> 00:19:04,999 It's a bunch of losers and burnt out buildings. 325 00:19:05,066 --> 00:19:07,066 The problem is they have the wrong story. 326 00:19:07,132 --> 00:19:09,733 And what do we do when reporters have the wrong story? 327 00:19:09,800 --> 00:19:11,600 Give 'em a new one. 328 00:19:11,666 --> 00:19:14,066 You need to take control of this, make an official announcement. 329 00:19:14,132 --> 00:19:15,500 Give them the other story. 330 00:19:15,566 --> 00:19:16,867 Yeah, sure, of course. 331 00:19:16,933 --> 00:19:19,766 The church. Do it at the church. 332 00:19:19,833 --> 00:19:23,132 The church's doors are closing, boo hoo. 333 00:19:23,199 --> 00:19:26,399 But you're opening new doors, opportunity for all. 334 00:19:28,399 --> 00:19:30,399 Yes. 335 00:19:30,466 --> 00:19:33,500 Yes. Tomas, we'll make the official announcement down on First. 336 00:19:33,566 --> 00:19:34,933 Call every reporter in the city. 337 00:19:34,999 --> 00:19:36,032 Wonderful, I'll set it up. 338 00:19:36,099 --> 00:19:37,766 Come on. Tomas, where are you? Come on. 339 00:19:37,833 --> 00:19:40,099 We gotta get going. Get on the phone. What are you doing? Tomas! 340 00:19:40,166 --> 00:19:42,733 I'm coming, Mr. Grant. 341 00:19:42,800 --> 00:19:46,199 All right, Father. I got your test results right here. Hmm. 342 00:19:46,266 --> 00:19:50,066 High cholesterol, elevated sed rate 343 00:19:50,132 --> 00:19:52,166 and it looks like you're pregnant. 344 00:19:52,233 --> 00:19:54,366 I'm going to need you to stick around and retest. 345 00:20:00,233 --> 00:20:03,233 Behold, I've made the statues multiply. 346 00:20:03,299 --> 00:20:06,066 Well, I gotta say that looks pretty good, Hardison. 347 00:20:06,132 --> 00:20:09,399 I mean... Yeah. It's a... 348 00:20:13,099 --> 00:20:15,566 Polystyrene? Amongst other things. 349 00:20:15,633 --> 00:20:17,032 Uh-huh. Just don't eat it. 350 00:20:17,766 --> 00:20:19,666 Or breathe near it. 351 00:20:25,132 --> 00:20:28,433 All right. Show us what you got. 352 00:20:28,500 --> 00:20:31,399 Test subject number one. 353 00:20:36,633 --> 00:20:41,600 No. I said bleeding tears, not bleeding ears. 354 00:20:41,666 --> 00:20:43,433 All right, look, look, look, man. 355 00:20:43,500 --> 00:20:46,433 You lucky on this deadline I didn't give you a baking soda volcano. 356 00:20:46,500 --> 00:20:48,533 Yeah, but this is... 357 00:20:48,600 --> 00:20:51,032 Okay. What else you got? 358 00:20:51,099 --> 00:20:52,800 That's ridiculous. 359 00:20:56,433 --> 00:20:58,032 Stigmata paintball gun. 360 00:20:58,099 --> 00:20:59,500 What? No, no, no. No. 361 00:20:59,566 --> 00:21:00,633 Yeah. Yeah. 362 00:21:00,700 --> 00:21:02,032 How does that work? 363 00:21:02,099 --> 00:21:04,266 Oh, I've been practicing. Check me out. 364 00:21:13,999 --> 00:21:19,299 Okay, Hardison, could you just make the statue cry without melting St. Nick's head? 365 00:21:20,333 --> 00:21:21,600 Don't melt Santa. 366 00:21:21,666 --> 00:21:23,466 It's not Santa. 367 00:21:25,700 --> 00:21:28,933 What, are you 10 feet from there? How can you miss that? You're standing right here. 368 00:21:28,999 --> 00:21:31,299 Everybody can't be Eliot. Shut up. Shut up. Unbelievable. 369 00:21:38,566 --> 00:21:40,366 Grant lined up? 370 00:21:40,433 --> 00:21:44,199 Uh-huh. Yeah. He'll be there, with the press. 371 00:21:50,500 --> 00:21:54,266 Oh, um, I've been meaning to ask you. 372 00:21:54,333 --> 00:21:57,333 How was it, you know, talking to Maggie again? 373 00:21:57,399 --> 00:22:01,999 Good, yeah. Strange, but good. 374 00:22:02,066 --> 00:22:04,399 Yeah. Yeah. 375 00:22:06,132 --> 00:22:08,132 Yeah, I still feel, uh... 376 00:22:09,166 --> 00:22:12,700 What? Guilty about Sam? 377 00:22:12,766 --> 00:22:15,733 No, no, not that. Well, yeah, I mean... 378 00:22:18,733 --> 00:22:21,566 Yeah, and other things. Other things. But... 379 00:22:27,066 --> 00:22:28,500 You never cheated on her, Nate. 380 00:22:28,566 --> 00:22:29,766 I know. 381 00:22:31,066 --> 00:22:32,299 I know. 382 00:22:33,066 --> 00:22:34,900 Tempted. 383 00:22:34,967 --> 00:22:37,333 No. No, you weren't. I was. 384 00:22:37,399 --> 00:22:39,500 Not really. 385 00:22:39,566 --> 00:22:42,299 You've always been the good guy. 386 00:22:42,366 --> 00:22:44,800 That's, you know, what made it fun. 387 00:22:44,867 --> 00:22:49,199 Well, a part of what made it fun between us back then. 388 00:22:50,500 --> 00:22:52,099 Back then, yeah. 389 00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:56,099 And what about now? 390 00:22:58,199 --> 00:23:00,500 I don't know. What about now? 391 00:23:00,566 --> 00:23:03,633 That's what we have to figure out. 392 00:23:03,700 --> 00:23:06,600 By we, I mean, you, of course. 393 00:23:08,233 --> 00:23:11,066 Of course. Of course. 394 00:23:14,199 --> 00:23:18,066 Uh, just don't take too long. 395 00:23:26,766 --> 00:23:31,700 A lifestyle center to revitalize the life of this neighborhood. 396 00:23:31,766 --> 00:23:35,600 A pulsing heart of opportunity and commerce in the center of... 397 00:23:35,666 --> 00:23:40,666 Everybody come quickly. You have to see this. It's a miracle. 398 00:23:48,066 --> 00:23:49,600 It's a miracle. 399 00:23:50,566 --> 00:23:51,999 It's a miracle. 400 00:24:01,099 --> 00:24:02,800 Not too bad. 401 00:24:02,867 --> 00:24:05,099 It was nothing really. It's just basic chemistry. 402 00:24:05,166 --> 00:24:08,800 See, an oil polymer that reacts with a secondary chemical in the candles, 403 00:24:08,867 --> 00:24:12,566 no candle smoke, absolutely no evidence. Light a candle. 404 00:24:12,633 --> 00:24:15,800 The local news will pick up the event. 405 00:24:15,867 --> 00:24:18,366 Grant will crawl back into his hole for a while, 406 00:24:18,433 --> 00:24:23,132 and well, at least for the time being, it will stay open to the... 407 00:24:23,199 --> 00:24:24,299 Whoa! 408 00:24:27,900 --> 00:24:30,533 Whoa! That's a lot of public. 409 00:24:30,600 --> 00:24:33,900 I'm very good. Yeah. A little too good. 410 00:24:42,099 --> 00:24:43,867 What did we just do? 411 00:24:57,733 --> 00:25:00,399 A weeping statue of St. Nick is on YouTube. 412 00:25:00,466 --> 00:25:02,066 Good, this church will never shut down. 413 00:25:02,132 --> 00:25:03,900 Oh! There's just so many people here. 414 00:25:03,967 --> 00:25:06,199 I mean, what if they find out it's a... 415 00:25:06,266 --> 00:25:07,399 Fake? 416 00:25:07,466 --> 00:25:11,600 Hellfire, damnation, etcetera. You know what? 417 00:25:11,666 --> 00:25:15,099 I'm going to step over here so when the good Lord goes down on all y'all, 418 00:25:15,166 --> 00:25:16,399 I don't get hit by the lightning. 419 00:25:16,466 --> 00:25:18,233 Wasn't Zeus the one with the lightning? 420 00:25:18,299 --> 00:25:20,600 Guys, guys, this is still a big win. 421 00:25:20,666 --> 00:25:23,566 Sophie, find out where Grant is and make sure that he's... 422 00:25:23,633 --> 00:25:24,666 What did you do? 423 00:25:24,733 --> 00:25:26,933 What do you mean? 424 00:25:30,766 --> 00:25:32,867 What? You don't believe in miracles? 425 00:25:32,933 --> 00:25:35,533 The word "miracle" does not appear anywhere in the Old or New Testaments. 426 00:25:35,600 --> 00:25:38,099 What about the wedding at Canaan, huh? What about Lazarus? 427 00:25:38,166 --> 00:25:39,867 Please tell me you had nothing to do with this. 428 00:25:39,933 --> 00:25:42,533 I had nothing to do with this. 429 00:25:42,600 --> 00:25:48,700 Nate, you're lying to me, right to my face, in church. 430 00:25:48,766 --> 00:25:50,366 There's a fake miracle in my church. 431 00:25:53,399 --> 00:25:56,299 You know, there's a reason you didn't become a priest. 432 00:25:56,366 --> 00:25:58,199 I do what I can. 433 00:25:58,266 --> 00:26:02,166 You can't play God, Nate. Just tell me what's going on and we'll try to fix it. 434 00:26:02,233 --> 00:26:03,900 Paul, listen to me. 435 00:26:03,967 --> 00:26:06,733 For your own good, I can't tell you what's going on here. 436 00:26:06,800 --> 00:26:11,733 But I can tell you that I... That I got it covered. 437 00:26:15,600 --> 00:26:19,066 They're in spin mode. It's a mess. 438 00:26:19,132 --> 00:26:23,333 I'm going to put a nail in his coffin right now. 439 00:26:23,399 --> 00:26:27,233 Well, make it 10. I don't want that son of a bitch crawling out. 440 00:26:34,132 --> 00:26:39,500 So, St. Nicholas, a miracle. 441 00:26:40,433 --> 00:26:42,132 Obviously we can't... 442 00:26:42,199 --> 00:26:43,032 Yeah, I know. I've been up all night with this. 443 00:26:43,099 --> 00:26:45,366 I figured as much. 444 00:26:45,433 --> 00:26:47,032 I do have a spin on it. 445 00:26:47,099 --> 00:26:50,466 No, no, no. Forget it. I've killed the American town. 446 00:26:50,533 --> 00:26:54,333 This miracle, it gave me a real crisis of conscience. 447 00:26:54,399 --> 00:26:58,900 Excellent. Yeah, that's good. We can work with that. 448 00:26:58,967 --> 00:27:01,733 I looked into my heart, I paced, I cried. 449 00:27:02,967 --> 00:27:06,099 But by dawn, I had my answer. 450 00:27:08,833 --> 00:27:10,266 Bibletopia! 451 00:27:13,299 --> 00:27:15,500 It's a theme park? Uh-uh. 452 00:27:15,566 --> 00:27:18,867 Lifestyle and recreation center. Here, let me give you the tour. 453 00:27:18,933 --> 00:27:22,500 So, the church stays, at least the statue stays 454 00:27:22,566 --> 00:27:25,233 and maybe that one wall with the stained glass, but the rest, gone. 455 00:27:25,299 --> 00:27:28,500 Now, flanking the statue, two food courts. 456 00:27:28,566 --> 00:27:32,333 So, the original pews, they're now outdoors for mealtime seating, 457 00:27:32,399 --> 00:27:33,833 holy contemplation, whatever. 458 00:27:33,900 --> 00:27:36,800 Shops aplenty on the perimeter, but this, 459 00:27:36,867 --> 00:27:39,967 there will be a sea, an actual sea 460 00:27:40,032 --> 00:27:43,933 surrounding the park that will part every 30 minutes. 461 00:27:43,999 --> 00:27:46,600 Huh? And then while people are waiting to come in, 462 00:27:46,666 --> 00:27:51,399 they can enjoy previews, food and souvenirs at the Tears of St. Nick Cafe. 463 00:27:51,466 --> 00:27:54,700 Come to pray, stay to shop. 464 00:27:54,766 --> 00:27:58,032 We also got this. St. Nicholas bobble heads. 465 00:28:01,166 --> 00:28:02,633 There you go. 466 00:28:06,066 --> 00:28:07,666 You're serious about this? 467 00:28:09,566 --> 00:28:13,032 Hey, come on, Kristi, you and I both know this is not a real miracle. 468 00:28:13,099 --> 00:28:16,066 A, because miracles don't exist, and two, because this pain-in-the-ass priest 469 00:28:16,132 --> 00:28:17,900 will do anything to keep his church open. 470 00:28:17,967 --> 00:28:20,132 But, hey, I owe him a debt. 471 00:28:20,199 --> 00:28:25,032 I mean, I never would have thought of Bibletopia without his divine intervention. 472 00:28:25,099 --> 00:28:28,666 This stupid priest, he's going to make me millions. 473 00:28:33,032 --> 00:28:35,600 Bibletopia? The man cannot be stopped. 474 00:28:35,666 --> 00:28:37,800 It's like everything we throw at him just makes him stronger. 475 00:28:37,867 --> 00:28:41,500 Kind of admire him, though, I mean, my nephew would like Bibletopia. 476 00:28:41,566 --> 00:28:44,800 No, no. See, this is what happens when you mess with God. 477 00:28:44,867 --> 00:28:48,032 He raises up your enemies with his right hand, and then he smites you with his left. 478 00:28:48,099 --> 00:28:50,066 No, no, no, no. We can use this. 479 00:28:50,132 --> 00:28:52,066 Just give me a second to... I just need... 480 00:28:57,433 --> 00:28:59,233 Apostolic visitation. 481 00:29:00,032 --> 00:29:01,433 Come again? 482 00:29:02,999 --> 00:29:04,633 It's the Vatican. 483 00:29:10,967 --> 00:29:13,366 What? 484 00:29:13,433 --> 00:29:17,299 Apostolic visitation, it's like the Pope's, you know, CSI. 485 00:29:17,366 --> 00:29:18,833 They come, they investigate a miracle. 486 00:29:18,900 --> 00:29:20,967 They determine whether it's real or a hoax. 487 00:29:21,032 --> 00:29:23,233 If they find out the truth they're going to close this church down 488 00:29:23,299 --> 00:29:25,533 and blame Father Paul for fraud. 489 00:29:25,600 --> 00:29:29,333 I don't like this, Nate. No. I mean, even Grant, okay, he was hooked. 490 00:29:29,399 --> 00:29:31,999 Ordinarily we'd have him under control by now. And we'll get around to him. 491 00:29:32,066 --> 00:29:34,333 We'll get around to him. We'll save the church and we'll take out Grant. 492 00:29:34,399 --> 00:29:38,800 You screwed up. You're going to have to undo your own con. 493 00:29:45,066 --> 00:29:46,933 Gentlemen. 494 00:29:46,999 --> 00:29:50,233 Father, Father! Excuse... I'm having just big spiritual crisis. 495 00:29:50,299 --> 00:29:52,867 You guys can understand more than anybody. I need to talk to you right now. 496 00:29:52,933 --> 00:29:54,666 You're the only one who can... 497 00:29:54,733 --> 00:29:56,533 Listen, I hope you weren't gonna do what I know you were just about to do. 498 00:29:56,600 --> 00:30:00,032 Tell the truth? You bet I was. Nate, no more lies. 499 00:30:00,099 --> 00:30:02,933 The Vatican's here. You and I both know what that means. 500 00:30:02,999 --> 00:30:05,900 Yeah. Break out the Grappa. 501 00:30:05,967 --> 00:30:07,633 Does my getting defrocked amuse you? 502 00:30:07,700 --> 00:30:11,066 No. Listen. Listen. Just let me explain this to you, okay? 503 00:30:11,132 --> 00:30:14,900 All right. Just... This is... In here. 504 00:30:14,967 --> 00:30:18,233 Oh. There's always a loophole with you. 505 00:30:18,299 --> 00:30:19,900 That's my side. 506 00:30:24,500 --> 00:30:29,099 How do you do, Father? I was wondering if I could introduce you... 507 00:30:31,333 --> 00:30:33,199 I get immunity, of course. 508 00:30:33,266 --> 00:30:36,032 Nothing I say can be repeated to anyone, nor is it admissible in a court of law. 509 00:30:36,099 --> 00:30:37,766 Start it right. 510 00:30:37,833 --> 00:30:39,500 So, the statue... 511 00:30:40,233 --> 00:30:42,032 Bless me, Father... 512 00:30:43,600 --> 00:30:45,867 Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been... 513 00:30:45,933 --> 00:30:50,766 Two years, three months, 15 days since my last confession. 514 00:30:53,900 --> 00:30:55,766 I was at the funeral. 515 00:30:58,967 --> 00:31:01,233 So, the statue, we faked the miracle. 516 00:31:01,299 --> 00:31:02,800 I know. 517 00:31:02,867 --> 00:31:05,733 Now, I had no idea that it would get as much attention as... 518 00:31:05,800 --> 00:31:08,032 And Grant, that he would turn around 519 00:31:08,099 --> 00:31:10,266 and he would try to profit from it. 520 00:31:10,333 --> 00:31:15,999 I have committed a string of selfish and hurtful acts, Father. 521 00:31:17,666 --> 00:31:19,900 Wrong acts, right reasons. 522 00:31:19,967 --> 00:31:23,132 Oh, the ends justify the means. Is that it, Nate? Is that it? 523 00:31:23,199 --> 00:31:26,533 The details. God looks at how we do a thing and he judges. 524 00:31:26,600 --> 00:31:28,333 Hey, I'm out here helping people, I mean... 525 00:31:28,399 --> 00:31:30,032 Are you? Or are you trying to kill yourself, 526 00:31:30,099 --> 00:31:33,166 maybe take a couple of bad guys down with you? 527 00:31:35,933 --> 00:31:38,733 I am trying to save your damn church. 528 00:31:38,800 --> 00:31:40,666 Save my church. 529 00:31:40,733 --> 00:31:43,766 You faked a miracle. My parishioners, my flock, my church, 530 00:31:43,833 --> 00:31:45,867 they believed in that miracle. 531 00:31:45,933 --> 00:31:49,166 And now you are ripping out that faith and replacing it with a lie. 532 00:31:49,233 --> 00:31:52,066 Maybe I'm not here to save this church, Nate. 533 00:31:52,132 --> 00:31:55,066 Maybe I need to lose this church to save you. 534 00:32:03,032 --> 00:32:04,766 Go and sin no more. 535 00:32:19,066 --> 00:32:20,533 Excuse me. 536 00:32:23,566 --> 00:32:28,600 Andy, there's a bit of trouble, nothing alarming, it's just... 537 00:32:30,266 --> 00:32:31,833 The Vatican's here. 538 00:32:31,900 --> 00:32:34,900 I know. Isn't it great? Great? 539 00:32:34,967 --> 00:32:37,700 If they think it's real, we go forward with Bibletopia. 540 00:32:37,766 --> 00:32:42,867 If they expose it, well, then I get good press for closing this fraud parish. 541 00:32:42,933 --> 00:32:46,566 You see, when people say controversy, I hear attention. 542 00:32:49,099 --> 00:32:52,099 Andy, you are shameless. 543 00:32:53,833 --> 00:32:56,533 Oh, God, you get me so well. 544 00:32:56,600 --> 00:32:59,399 Hey, come on, get me a picture with these guys. 545 00:33:01,032 --> 00:33:03,333 Padre, how are you? Nice to meet you. Andrew Grant. 546 00:33:03,399 --> 00:33:04,766 It's a real pleasure to have you here. 547 00:33:04,833 --> 00:33:07,099 This is my church, hopefully it will be my church someday soon. 548 00:33:07,166 --> 00:33:09,700 It's good to have you here. Was your flight over okay? 549 00:33:09,766 --> 00:33:11,299 Oh, it's monsignor. I'm sorry. 550 00:33:11,366 --> 00:33:13,199 I don't know the proper titles for these things. 551 00:33:13,266 --> 00:33:16,466 Hey, look. Would you mind if I take a photograph with you guys? 552 00:33:16,533 --> 00:33:19,933 It'll be just for my own personal wall of fame that I have at my office. 553 00:33:19,999 --> 00:33:22,466 I'm going to confession. 554 00:33:22,533 --> 00:33:25,999 Okay, say... What do we call it? Rosary. 555 00:33:26,066 --> 00:33:27,900 There it is. That's what it is. 556 00:33:27,967 --> 00:33:29,566 Right behind you. 557 00:33:29,633 --> 00:33:30,766 That's great. 558 00:33:45,132 --> 00:33:48,266 Soon as that van full of Vatican CSI equipment gets here we're screwed. 559 00:33:48,333 --> 00:33:50,666 That's what I was trying to say, but you guys wouldn't let me talk 560 00:33:50,733 --> 00:33:52,533 while we were all in that closet. 561 00:33:52,600 --> 00:33:55,266 If we leave it here they're going to find out the statue isn't really crying 562 00:33:55,333 --> 00:33:57,733 and blame Father Paul for fraud. 563 00:33:57,800 --> 00:34:02,566 Sophie, if we steal the statue he's going to get blamed for covering up a fraud. 564 00:34:06,900 --> 00:34:08,433 This ain't funny. 565 00:34:08,500 --> 00:34:10,967 As soon as they run a scanner or a pH stick over that statue 566 00:34:11,032 --> 00:34:12,666 they're going see those aren't real tears. 567 00:34:12,733 --> 00:34:16,366 You're right. It's only a matter of time. 568 00:34:16,433 --> 00:34:18,633 You know, Father Paul, he can't help but tell the truth 569 00:34:18,700 --> 00:34:20,566 and he's going to flip on us. 570 00:34:20,633 --> 00:34:22,433 I hope this is the part where you suggest prayer. 571 00:34:22,500 --> 00:34:26,833 No. The weeping statue of St. Nicholas is not going to be stolen. 572 00:34:26,900 --> 00:34:31,766 It's going to miraculously disappear in the middle of tomorrow's mass. 573 00:34:31,833 --> 00:34:32,833 I'm sorry? 574 00:34:32,900 --> 00:34:34,833 In front of the priests, 575 00:34:34,900 --> 00:34:37,099 the Vatican, the entire congregation. 576 00:34:37,166 --> 00:34:39,933 Have you learned nothing, Nate? 577 00:34:39,999 --> 00:34:41,800 How much does the statue weigh? 578 00:34:41,867 --> 00:34:43,166 About 900 pounds. 579 00:34:43,233 --> 00:34:44,399 Good. 580 00:34:47,833 --> 00:34:49,933 I am so sorry, Nana. 581 00:34:50,733 --> 00:34:51,967 The Lord be with you. 582 00:34:52,032 --> 00:34:53,566 Also with you. 583 00:34:53,633 --> 00:34:56,266 A reading from the Gospel according to Luke. 584 00:34:56,333 --> 00:34:58,233 Glory to you, oh, Lord. 585 00:34:58,299 --> 00:35:02,466 A man had a fig tree in his vineyard, but it did not bear fruit, 586 00:35:02,533 --> 00:35:04,566 so he said to the man who took care of the vineyard, 587 00:35:04,633 --> 00:35:07,533 "For three years, I've been looking for fruit on this tree, 588 00:35:07,600 --> 00:35:10,600 "and for three years I've found nothing. 589 00:35:10,666 --> 00:35:13,399 "It's a waste of my land. Cut it down. " 590 00:35:13,466 --> 00:35:17,666 "Sir," the worker replied, "leave it alone for one more year. 591 00:35:17,733 --> 00:35:20,533 "Let me dig around it and fertilize it. 592 00:35:20,600 --> 00:35:24,066 "If it bears fruit next year, all is well. 593 00:35:24,132 --> 00:35:26,633 "If not, then cut it down. " 594 00:35:28,600 --> 00:35:31,266 The gospel of the Lord. Praise the Lord... 595 00:35:32,466 --> 00:35:35,666 Repent or perish! 596 00:35:38,733 --> 00:35:41,600 That's Luke 13. 597 00:35:41,666 --> 00:35:46,466 Tough to swallow, huh? But like all parables, this one's open to interpretation. 598 00:35:47,833 --> 00:35:51,266 Was the worker just being lazy, stalling? 599 00:35:51,333 --> 00:35:55,867 I'll get to it, boss, next year, manana. 600 00:35:57,466 --> 00:36:02,132 Or did the worker have a secret? 601 00:36:02,199 --> 00:36:07,132 A secret that only our faith sustains us over time. 602 00:36:08,900 --> 00:36:12,933 The owner doesn't have his hands in the soil. 603 00:36:12,999 --> 00:36:18,833 Only the worker is there every day in the dirt with the tree. 604 00:36:18,900 --> 00:36:23,666 He has faith in his skill and faith that God will support that skill, 605 00:36:23,733 --> 00:36:27,433 and maybe in a year's time the tree will bear fruit. 606 00:36:29,433 --> 00:36:32,099 He doesn't look for the easy way out. 607 00:36:32,166 --> 00:36:35,999 He doesn't say, "Oh, why would the Lord do this to me? 608 00:36:36,066 --> 00:36:41,800 "If only he would give me a sign. If only he'd give us a miracle. " 609 00:36:44,700 --> 00:36:47,967 But the worker doesn't ask for a miracle. 610 00:36:48,032 --> 00:36:51,433 He has faith in himself, and faith in God, 611 00:36:51,500 --> 00:36:53,733 and he only asks for time. 612 00:36:58,166 --> 00:37:00,199 Let us proclaim our faith. 613 00:37:02,833 --> 00:37:06,199 We believe in one God, the Father, the Almighty, 614 00:37:06,266 --> 00:37:07,933 the maker of heaven and earth, 615 00:37:07,999 --> 00:37:10,233 of all that is seen and unseen. 616 00:37:10,299 --> 00:37:12,800 We believe in one Lord, Jesus Christ, 617 00:37:12,867 --> 00:37:15,066 the only son of God, 618 00:37:15,132 --> 00:37:17,032 eternally begotten of the Father, 619 00:37:17,099 --> 00:37:21,166 God from God, Light from Light, true God from true God, 620 00:37:21,233 --> 00:37:24,333 begotten, not made, one in Being with the Father. 621 00:37:32,333 --> 00:37:34,933 All right. Let's do it. 622 00:37:37,099 --> 00:37:38,233 Whoa! 623 00:37:39,967 --> 00:37:42,967 For us men, for our salvation. 624 00:37:49,500 --> 00:37:53,199 I saw what happened. An angel took it away. 625 00:38:01,266 --> 00:38:04,333 Calm down, people. That's not what's happening. 626 00:38:08,099 --> 00:38:09,766 I know what's going on here. 627 00:38:16,933 --> 00:38:21,099 There is no miracle. Somebody stole the statue, 628 00:38:22,600 --> 00:38:24,399 and I know who it is. 629 00:38:26,766 --> 00:38:29,266 Andrew Grant. 630 00:38:29,333 --> 00:38:31,867 Hey, that's the guy that bought the church. That's not my van. 631 00:38:31,933 --> 00:38:36,032 What kind of monster fakes a miracle for a profit? You sicken me. 632 00:38:36,099 --> 00:38:38,833 Thief! That priest is desperate. 633 00:38:38,900 --> 00:38:43,566 He hid the statue in the van. He forged the registration papers to frame me. 634 00:38:43,633 --> 00:38:45,199 We don't believe you. 635 00:38:45,266 --> 00:38:46,999 Look, look, look. Right here. See? 636 00:38:47,066 --> 00:38:49,600 My assistant, he was with me the whole time. 637 00:38:49,666 --> 00:38:51,999 Okay, now, look. We bought this property. 638 00:38:52,066 --> 00:38:54,733 We're going to fix up the neighborhood, right? 639 00:38:54,800 --> 00:38:55,867 No. 640 00:38:56,933 --> 00:38:57,967 No? 641 00:38:58,032 --> 00:38:59,933 No! 642 00:38:59,999 --> 00:39:03,900 He got the land under this church the same way he got the rest of the neighborhood, 643 00:39:03,967 --> 00:39:09,666 the same way he gets all of his properties, by bribery, intimidation and violence. 644 00:39:09,733 --> 00:39:16,633 Andrew Grant sent a bunch of thugs to beat up Father Paul. 645 00:39:16,700 --> 00:39:20,533 If I go to the police with what I have I could put him in jail. 646 00:39:21,700 --> 00:39:24,032 And me, too, probably. 647 00:39:24,099 --> 00:39:27,999 Father, what can I do to make things right? 648 00:39:32,800 --> 00:39:34,733 You have to do the right thing. 649 00:39:39,900 --> 00:39:42,466 You're gonna have to think very hard about this. 650 00:39:42,533 --> 00:39:46,666 We're going to have a very long discussion. Okay. Great, good. 651 00:39:46,733 --> 00:39:48,466 Cops got here fast. 652 00:39:48,533 --> 00:39:53,166 It's almost as if an investigative journalist called them with a tip off. 653 00:39:53,233 --> 00:39:56,333 Kristi, save me, huh? You can spin this, right? 654 00:39:56,399 --> 00:40:01,233 Instead of felony, maybe soften it to controversy. 655 00:40:01,299 --> 00:40:05,900 You know, when you say controversy, I always hear attention. 656 00:40:11,867 --> 00:40:13,999 Are you even British? 657 00:40:16,099 --> 00:40:18,833 I gotta tell her something. I gotta talk to her. 658 00:40:27,867 --> 00:40:29,099 You used me. 659 00:40:29,166 --> 00:40:32,032 Yeah, well, you used me, too. 660 00:40:32,099 --> 00:40:33,867 Broke the seal of the confessional, 661 00:40:33,933 --> 00:40:36,967 told everyone the statue was a fake. 662 00:40:37,032 --> 00:40:39,299 To save the faith of my parish. 663 00:40:40,967 --> 00:40:43,633 Wrong act, right reasons. 664 00:40:43,700 --> 00:40:46,066 End justify the means, Father? 665 00:40:47,299 --> 00:40:49,466 I'll count myself blessed and take my miracle. 666 00:40:49,533 --> 00:40:52,333 Ah, but there was no miracle. 667 00:40:52,399 --> 00:40:56,266 Nate, five thieves saved my church. 668 00:41:00,032 --> 00:41:02,333 It was good to see you, Paul. 669 00:41:02,399 --> 00:41:05,066 You better plan on being there next Sunday. 670 00:41:05,132 --> 00:41:07,867 I've got a great sermon on making amends. 671 00:41:10,766 --> 00:41:13,199 We'll see. 672 00:41:13,266 --> 00:41:16,500 You'll be back. I have faith in you. 673 00:42:09,500 --> 00:42:11,933 Look at that, we saved the church. 674 00:42:13,867 --> 00:42:18,066 It's like Christmas. See, I told you St. Nicholas was Santa Claus. 675 00:42:18,132 --> 00:42:19,867 He's not, Parker. 676 00:42:19,933 --> 00:42:21,833 Who is he then? 677 00:42:21,900 --> 00:42:23,399 St. Nicholas? 678 00:42:26,900 --> 00:42:29,132 Is the patron saint of thieves.73776

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