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1
00:03:40,512 --> 00:03:42,306
We're not going back, you know.
2
00:04:00,449 --> 00:04:02,576
Hey. Head.
3
00:04:07,498 --> 00:04:09,917
I don't know why you didn't
just let me pack for you.
4
00:04:12,544 --> 00:04:13,644
Tusker?
5
00:04:15,214 --> 00:04:17,091
Why didn't you let me pack for you?
6
00:04:17,174 --> 00:04:22,221
- Do you hear that sound?
- What sound?
7
00:04:22,304 --> 00:04:24,473
Do you hear it? Listen.
8
00:04:29,311 --> 00:04:31,230
It's the sound of me
ignoring you.
9
00:04:37,569 --> 00:04:38,904
Well, we're not going back
10
00:04:38,988 --> 00:04:40,840
because you realised you
forgot something again.
11
00:04:40,864 --> 00:04:42,992
That's all I'm saying.
12
00:04:43,075 --> 00:04:45,577
Not if we're gonna stick
to this schedule of yours.
13
00:04:45,661 --> 00:04:48,247
Well, do you think you could
drive just a little faster?
14
00:04:48,330 --> 00:04:50,207
I mean, if you drive any slower,
15
00:04:50,291 --> 00:04:51,476
I might as well
fucking walk there.
16
00:04:51,500 --> 00:04:53,919
Yes, well, you'll be
walking there in a minute.
17
00:04:55,504 --> 00:04:56,839
How about just exploring
18
00:04:56,922 --> 00:04:59,466
the outer regions of fifth gear?
19
00:05:04,138 --> 00:05:05,657
- All right. That's better.
- That's good.
20
00:05:05,681 --> 00:05:07,141
Didn't you hear
what it was doing?
21
00:05:07,224 --> 00:05:08,618
Yes, but it still sounds
like second.
22
00:05:08,642 --> 00:05:10,060
No, it doesn't.
23
00:05:10,144 --> 00:05:12,813
It's like second sounds
like second at...
24
00:05:12,896 --> 00:05:14,940
you know, 50 miles an hour.
25
00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:35,044
Just let me know
if you wanna use the thing.
26
00:05:35,127 --> 00:05:37,463
- What?
- Just in case it's easier.
27
00:05:39,089 --> 00:05:40,424
The satnav.
28
00:05:42,176 --> 00:05:44,678
No. No.
29
00:05:44,762 --> 00:05:46,513
It's what we bought it for.
30
00:05:46,597 --> 00:05:48,557
No, it's what you bought it for.
31
00:05:48,640 --> 00:05:50,976
I can't stand it. I can't
stand to listen to that voice
32
00:05:51,060 --> 00:05:53,020
because I feel like
I'm back in school again.
33
00:05:53,103 --> 00:05:55,147
You feel like you've done
something wrong.
34
00:05:55,230 --> 00:05:57,816
You haven't turned right.
35
00:05:57,900 --> 00:05:59,568
You're supposed to turn right.
36
00:06:01,487 --> 00:06:02,821
Why aren't you turning right?
37
00:06:07,826 --> 00:06:09,846
How many decades do you have
to live in this country
38
00:06:09,870 --> 00:06:11,580
for that to make any sense?
39
00:06:11,663 --> 00:06:15,334
I'm just curious.
You find it soothing?
40
00:06:15,417 --> 00:06:16,752
Oh, yeah.
41
00:06:16,835 --> 00:06:18,462
Keep this, I love.
42
00:06:20,589 --> 00:06:22,841
- Don't you remember this?
- No, I don't.
43
00:06:22,925 --> 00:06:25,594
You don't?
Where were you in the '70s?
44
00:06:28,263 --> 00:06:29,431
Sing it with me.
45
00:07:30,617 --> 00:07:32,703
Think I might need
a lie down soon.
46
00:07:32,786 --> 00:07:34,246
- Really?
- Mm.
47
00:07:34,329 --> 00:07:36,748
Make a little pit stop.
48
00:07:40,252 --> 00:07:41,670
Sam...
49
00:07:43,464 --> 00:07:44,798
I'm fine.
50
00:07:47,009 --> 00:07:49,303
All right, we'll go on
for a bit, and then
51
00:07:50,429 --> 00:07:51,805
call it a day.
52
00:07:51,889 --> 00:07:53,169
There's no point in
overdoing it.
53
00:08:04,359 --> 00:08:05,777
Have you finished?
54
00:08:05,861 --> 00:08:09,156
Oh, yes. Thank you very much.
Thank you.
55
00:08:09,239 --> 00:08:10,782
Can I ask you?
56
00:08:10,866 --> 00:08:12,201
Did you want one?
57
00:08:13,160 --> 00:08:14,870
An autograph?
58
00:08:14,953 --> 00:08:16,053
From him?
59
00:08:16,788 --> 00:08:17,888
'Cause I saw you looking
60
00:08:17,956 --> 00:08:19,356
and I wasn't sure
if you wanted one.
61
00:08:23,670 --> 00:08:24,770
Do you have a pen on you?
62
00:08:26,465 --> 00:08:28,425
All right. But if you want one,
63
00:08:28,509 --> 00:08:29,676
he'll sign one for you.
64
00:08:29,760 --> 00:08:31,261
He's shy, but he will.
65
00:08:31,345 --> 00:08:33,430
Either on a napkin
or if you have
66
00:08:33,514 --> 00:08:35,891
one of his piano albums,
he'll...
67
00:08:35,974 --> 00:08:37,851
- Thanks.
- Okay.
68
00:08:37,935 --> 00:08:39,353
All right. Thank you.
69
00:08:46,693 --> 00:08:47,962
How did you come to be
this person?
70
00:08:47,986 --> 00:08:48,987
I don't know. I don't know.
71
00:08:49,071 --> 00:08:50,507
I don't even know why I do it,
because
72
00:08:50,531 --> 00:08:53,367
it really isn't even satisfying
any more,
73
00:08:53,450 --> 00:08:54,868
half the time anyway.
74
00:08:54,952 --> 00:08:56,328
Oh, so why do you do it?
75
00:08:57,788 --> 00:08:59,206
Because of the other half.
76
00:09:19,935 --> 00:09:21,603
It's good to get back
on the road again,
77
00:09:21,687 --> 00:09:22,787
don't you think?
78
00:09:26,024 --> 00:09:28,068
I didn't think she was going
to start.
79
00:09:28,151 --> 00:09:29,444
Well, the guy in the garage said
80
00:09:29,528 --> 00:09:31,280
she's in pretty good nick,
considering.
81
00:09:32,823 --> 00:09:36,118
That's good.
She hasn't let us down yet.
82
00:09:49,214 --> 00:09:50,716
Thanks.
83
00:09:50,799 --> 00:09:52,092
For what?
84
00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:54,026
This.
85
00:11:31,358 --> 00:11:33,735
That's 45.80.
86
00:11:36,863 --> 00:11:38,240
Thank you.
87
00:12:12,816 --> 00:12:13,916
Fuck.
88
00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:22,174
Shit.
89
00:12:29,374 --> 00:12:30,709
Tusker?
90
00:12:32,794 --> 00:12:33,894
Tusker!
91
00:12:46,600 --> 00:12:47,893
Shit.
92
00:12:47,976 --> 00:12:50,228
Shit.
93
00:12:50,812 --> 00:12:51,912
Fuck!
94
00:13:12,209 --> 00:13:13,309
Tusker.
95
00:13:56,169 --> 00:13:58,713
Wish you'd let me cook more,
you know?
96
00:13:58,797 --> 00:14:00,757
Why? it smells delicious.
97
00:14:03,093 --> 00:14:04,678
Just feel like a child.
98
00:14:04,761 --> 00:14:07,722
Oh, stop.
You're doing brilliantly.
99
00:14:07,806 --> 00:14:10,058
Oh, these onions.
100
00:14:10,141 --> 00:14:11,643
Let me do something, all right?
101
00:14:11,726 --> 00:14:13,645
Come on,
I'm not completely useless.
102
00:14:13,728 --> 00:14:16,398
No, you sit there. Be quiet.
103
00:15:30,680 --> 00:15:32,599
- Are you all right?
- Yeah. You all right?
104
00:15:34,309 --> 00:15:36,603
I'm really, really sorry
that I scared you today.
105
00:15:37,812 --> 00:15:40,148
Will you stop apologising? Hmm?
106
00:15:40,231 --> 00:15:41,399
No, I just...
107
00:15:41,483 --> 00:15:43,610
Well, you got a little confused.
And that happens,
108
00:15:43,693 --> 00:15:44,903
- we both know that.
- Well...
109
00:15:44,986 --> 00:15:47,113
- Yeah, but that was...
- Oh, come on.
110
00:15:54,329 --> 00:15:57,332
Looks like a clear night.
Get the telescope out?
111
00:16:00,418 --> 00:16:03,755
Then I can teach you
a thing or two.
112
00:16:05,715 --> 00:16:07,384
Where'd you put your pills?
113
00:16:10,303 --> 00:16:11,471
Washbag?
114
00:16:12,681 --> 00:16:13,932
Think that's where I put them.
115
00:16:15,266 --> 00:16:16,893
- Sam...
- Yes?
116
00:16:18,186 --> 00:16:19,771
I didn't bring them.
117
00:16:19,854 --> 00:16:21,982
What?
118
00:16:22,065 --> 00:16:23,775
Tusker, I told you
I should've packed.
119
00:16:23,858 --> 00:16:26,778
No. No. I took them out.
120
00:16:26,861 --> 00:16:28,446
Why?
121
00:16:31,866 --> 00:16:33,159
Because I didn't want them.
122
00:16:34,619 --> 00:16:37,330
- Tusker, it's...
- What? It's my choice.
123
00:16:37,414 --> 00:16:38,790
I didn't want them.
124
00:16:38,873 --> 00:16:41,376
We both know that they're not
doing anything anyway.
125
00:16:44,295 --> 00:16:45,672
We have to try.
126
00:16:48,383 --> 00:16:50,218
It's just
127
00:16:50,301 --> 00:16:51,886
that they remind me
128
00:16:53,054 --> 00:16:54,389
that I'm ill.
129
00:16:57,183 --> 00:16:58,560
And I don't want that.
130
00:17:02,647 --> 00:17:03,940
Not right now.
131
00:17:25,879 --> 00:17:27,047
Any good?
132
00:17:30,175 --> 00:17:31,509
Oh, no.
133
00:17:32,302 --> 00:17:33,970
It's, erm...
134
00:17:35,430 --> 00:17:36,765
I'm getting through it.
135
00:17:49,235 --> 00:17:50,570
I love this piece.
136
00:17:51,946 --> 00:17:55,075
- You always say that.
- Mm.
137
00:17:55,158 --> 00:17:57,160
And, yet, you never play it
for me.
138
00:18:03,958 --> 00:18:05,058
How's it going?
139
00:18:08,379 --> 00:18:09,479
It's not.
140
00:18:12,842 --> 00:18:14,302
Anything you want to talk about?
141
00:18:14,385 --> 00:18:16,513
No. No, no. No, no.
142
00:18:16,596 --> 00:18:18,765
I'll let you know.
143
00:18:20,558 --> 00:18:21,768
Writer's block?
144
00:18:32,487 --> 00:18:34,781
- Let's make a tape.
- What?
145
00:18:34,864 --> 00:18:36,199
You never want to make a tape.
146
00:18:36,282 --> 00:18:38,243
I know. But I brought the thing.
147
00:18:38,326 --> 00:18:39,702
- So...
- No, it's okay.
148
00:18:39,786 --> 00:18:41,287
I have it. I have it.
149
00:18:42,705 --> 00:18:44,916
You said you wanted to do
some work.
150
00:18:44,999 --> 00:18:46,417
Yeah, I know, but...
151
00:18:48,253 --> 00:18:49,546
Okay.
152
00:18:49,629 --> 00:18:51,339
Well, it's not gonna
write itself.
153
00:18:54,342 --> 00:18:57,762
- There. You... You...
- Yes. All right.
154
00:19:00,723 --> 00:19:02,350
- Okay.
- Yeah.
155
00:19:04,519 --> 00:19:09,482
So, er, today is the October 20.
156
00:19:09,566 --> 00:19:14,154
And welcome to
Dementia Hour on BBC Four.
157
00:19:14,237 --> 00:19:17,282
Yeah. Are we, er, gonna
take it seriously, or...
158
00:19:17,365 --> 00:19:19,617
Yes. We are.
159
00:19:19,701 --> 00:19:21,369
- Soon?
- Yes, sorry. All right.
160
00:19:22,871 --> 00:19:25,373
Right, erm,
so, how are you feeling?
161
00:19:25,456 --> 00:19:27,250
- Good. Happy.
- Yeah?
162
00:19:29,169 --> 00:19:30,295
Having a nice time?
163
00:19:31,462 --> 00:19:33,548
- Mm-hmm. And you?
- Hmm.
164
00:19:33,631 --> 00:19:35,508
Er, never a dull moment.
165
00:19:35,592 --> 00:19:37,260
And are you happy to be here?
166
00:19:38,344 --> 00:19:39,512
I'm happy to be with you.
167
00:19:40,263 --> 00:19:41,363
And where are we?
168
00:19:45,059 --> 00:19:46,779
Actually, I haven't
got a clue where we are.
169
00:19:51,566 --> 00:19:54,194
And what's it like for you?
This.
170
00:19:56,446 --> 00:19:57,739
I'm asking the questions.
171
00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:06,414
Right. Yeah, it's fine for me.
172
00:20:07,290 --> 00:20:08,390
Liar.
173
00:20:12,629 --> 00:20:14,839
Er, it has its moments.
174
00:20:18,676 --> 00:20:20,595
I'm afraid I haven't
been much help lately.
175
00:20:20,678 --> 00:20:21,930
No, you help me a lot.
176
00:20:32,273 --> 00:20:34,108
So, can you tell...
177
00:20:38,029 --> 00:20:39,447
that it's gotten worse?
178
00:20:51,084 --> 00:20:52,184
All right.
179
00:20:52,210 --> 00:20:55,088
If you had one wish in
the world, what would it be?
180
00:20:57,799 --> 00:20:59,676
I wish this holiday
wouldn't end.
181
00:21:03,221 --> 00:21:04,321
How about you?
182
00:21:06,849 --> 00:21:08,810
Well, I wish I didn't have
this thing.
183
00:21:08,893 --> 00:21:11,271
Idiot!
184
00:21:14,357 --> 00:21:16,859
Yeah. The bloody thing.
185
00:21:30,373 --> 00:21:31,473
You know,
186
00:21:32,083 --> 00:21:34,043
you just sit there
187
00:21:34,127 --> 00:21:35,336
doing nothing.
188
00:21:39,173 --> 00:21:41,050
Propping up the entire world.
189
00:22:11,956 --> 00:22:14,709
After 300 yards, turn left.
190
00:22:17,420 --> 00:22:18,713
She can just fuck off.
191
00:22:18,796 --> 00:22:20,774
She's getting us there
a lot quicker than you were.
192
00:22:20,798 --> 00:22:21,924
Really?
193
00:22:22,008 --> 00:22:24,510
She sounds like
Margaret fucking Thatcher.
194
00:22:26,346 --> 00:22:27,930
First it's Section 28,
195
00:22:28,014 --> 00:22:30,475
and now she's gonna tell us
where to go on our holiday.
196
00:22:32,185 --> 00:22:35,188
After 100 yards, turn left.
197
00:22:38,232 --> 00:22:39,359
Turn left.
198
00:22:39,442 --> 00:22:41,361
Is this it?
199
00:22:41,444 --> 00:22:44,947
We might not be able to
camp there any more, you know.
200
00:22:45,031 --> 00:22:47,200
Probably have rules against
these things now.
201
00:22:47,283 --> 00:22:48,383
Really?
202
00:22:49,786 --> 00:22:51,329
Well, I don't give a shit.
203
00:22:51,412 --> 00:22:52,639
What's the worst
that can happen?
204
00:22:52,663 --> 00:22:54,207
We'll pay a fine or whatever.
205
00:22:54,290 --> 00:22:57,418
What... Well, you know,
how much can it be?
206
00:22:57,502 --> 00:23:00,588
Well, we'll have to
find it first.
207
00:23:00,671 --> 00:23:02,715
Well, I'm...
I'm sure the Iron Lady
208
00:23:02,799 --> 00:23:05,009
will help us get there.
209
00:23:07,553 --> 00:23:11,349
Is this really the right road?
I'm just sayin'...
210
00:23:11,432 --> 00:23:12,433
We're goin' over.
211
00:23:12,517 --> 00:23:14,143
Listen, you don't look at me,
212
00:23:14,227 --> 00:23:15,454
I won't look at you, and then...
213
00:23:15,478 --> 00:23:16,479
Just look at the road.
214
00:23:16,562 --> 00:23:17,662
We'll stay on the road, OK?
215
00:23:17,688 --> 00:23:19,048
I can look at you,
I'm not driving.
216
00:23:19,107 --> 00:23:20,459
But if you look at me,
I look at you.
217
00:23:20,483 --> 00:23:22,610
- Well, don't.
- Well, don't look at me.
218
00:23:52,223 --> 00:23:54,434
Well, it certainly
hasn't changed much.
219
00:23:57,687 --> 00:24:00,106
We slept in that minuscule car
of yours.
220
00:24:03,109 --> 00:24:04,527
Yeah, and we'd
only known each other
221
00:24:04,610 --> 00:24:05,710
for about five minutes.
222
00:24:05,736 --> 00:24:08,072
It was long enough for you
to tell me you love me.
223
00:24:08,156 --> 00:24:09,532
- Did I?
- Mm.
224
00:24:09,615 --> 00:24:10,715
Really?
225
00:24:11,826 --> 00:24:13,870
Well, I've always been
very impulsive.
226
00:24:17,748 --> 00:24:19,083
Come on.
227
00:24:59,916 --> 00:25:01,751
Whoop.
228
00:25:02,919 --> 00:25:05,755
- You find it?
- Er...
229
00:25:08,925 --> 00:25:10,025
No.
230
00:25:10,051 --> 00:25:11,636
- No?
- No.
231
00:25:12,637 --> 00:25:14,931
Let me see. Hold those.
232
00:25:18,351 --> 00:25:19,852
Okay...
233
00:25:25,399 --> 00:25:27,652
Hey, ah, there it is.
You found it, you found it.
234
00:25:27,735 --> 00:25:29,946
- Did I?
- Yeah, that's it.
235
00:25:30,863 --> 00:25:33,324
Oh. Good Lord.
236
00:25:34,617 --> 00:25:35,743
Beginner's luck.
237
00:25:35,826 --> 00:25:38,162
No, you had very...
a very good teacher.
238
00:25:44,043 --> 00:25:45,143
You got it?
239
00:25:48,047 --> 00:25:52,051
Oh, yeah.
Beautiful. Beautiful.
240
00:25:52,134 --> 00:25:54,720
By the way,
I reserved your usual seat.
241
00:25:54,804 --> 00:25:57,515
- For the concert.
- Oh, okay, thanks.
242
00:26:01,310 --> 00:26:03,813
Not that I'm expecting many
people to show up, really.
243
00:26:04,564 --> 00:26:06,232
Well, then...
244
00:26:06,315 --> 00:26:10,444
it'll be very relaxing
and casual.
245
00:26:10,528 --> 00:26:12,405
Good way for you
to get back into it.
246
00:26:44,812 --> 00:26:45,912
Teach me.
247
00:26:46,897 --> 00:26:47,997
What?
248
00:26:48,941 --> 00:26:50,041
- That?
- Hmm.
249
00:26:50,901 --> 00:26:52,001
Now?
250
00:26:52,612 --> 00:26:54,864
Why?
251
00:26:54,947 --> 00:26:56,657
I want to learn.
252
00:26:57,908 --> 00:27:00,286
All right,
I want to be able to find it.
253
00:27:00,369 --> 00:27:02,163
- All right.
- Try.
254
00:27:02,246 --> 00:27:05,541
Okay. So, erm...
255
00:27:05,625 --> 00:27:07,585
First, you have to find
the, erm...
256
00:27:09,211 --> 00:27:10,311
the...
257
00:27:11,631 --> 00:27:13,299
Mm, what do you call it?
258
00:27:13,382 --> 00:27:15,259
It's a shape. This shape.
This shape.
259
00:27:15,343 --> 00:27:17,219
- Triangle?
- Yeah, triangle.
260
00:27:19,055 --> 00:27:20,723
And...
261
00:27:20,806 --> 00:27:22,892
you have to find the three
262
00:27:23,768 --> 00:27:25,061
brightest lights there
263
00:27:25,144 --> 00:27:27,063
that make the triangle.
264
00:27:27,146 --> 00:27:28,856
- These ones? These ones?
- Mm-hmm.
265
00:27:28,939 --> 00:27:31,651
Then draw a line
horizontally through it.
266
00:27:33,361 --> 00:27:35,154
And that's where
the Milky Way is.
267
00:27:43,079 --> 00:27:45,706
We could just go home, you know.
268
00:27:45,790 --> 00:27:47,100
There's no pressure
to do all this.
269
00:27:47,124 --> 00:27:48,250
No, I don't wanna go home.
270
00:27:48,334 --> 00:27:50,711
Yeah, but it's really
not important.
271
00:27:50,795 --> 00:27:53,214
No, it really is important, Sam.
272
00:27:54,131 --> 00:27:55,231
It really is.
273
00:27:58,094 --> 00:27:59,194
It's okay.
274
00:28:11,232 --> 00:28:13,401
I like it when you do that.
275
00:28:13,484 --> 00:28:14,584
It's nice.
276
00:28:17,029 --> 00:28:19,323
It makes me instantly sleepy.
277
00:28:25,871 --> 00:28:29,542
Oh, Lord.
278
00:28:29,625 --> 00:28:31,836
Jesus Christ, Ruby.
279
00:28:35,965 --> 00:28:39,051
- 'Night.
- Okay.
280
00:28:41,554 --> 00:28:43,556
- Good night, Sam.
- 'Night.
281
00:31:03,487 --> 00:31:05,781
- Hi! Hey. Hi. Hey.
- You made it.
282
00:31:05,865 --> 00:31:07,408
Aw! Come here, you.
283
00:31:07,491 --> 00:31:10,160
Look at you! You got so tall!
284
00:31:10,244 --> 00:31:12,580
You took your bloody time.
285
00:31:12,663 --> 00:31:15,708
It's that satnav thing.
It's terrible!
286
00:31:15,791 --> 00:31:18,711
Where's Ruby? Did you bring her?
Can I see her?
287
00:31:18,794 --> 00:31:20,212
Come on, Ruby. Come on out.
288
00:31:20,296 --> 00:31:24,341
- Oh! Isn't she adorable!
- Oh!
289
00:31:24,425 --> 00:31:25,718
She keeps us very busy.
290
00:31:25,801 --> 00:31:27,428
Yes, you can say that again.
291
00:31:27,511 --> 00:31:28,679
- Yeah, I bet.
- Clive! Hello.
292
00:31:28,762 --> 00:31:30,198
Leave your stuff,
we'll get it later.
293
00:31:30,222 --> 00:31:31,223
Oh, it's good to see you.
294
00:31:31,307 --> 00:31:32,850
How are you, then, you old sod?
295
00:31:32,933 --> 00:31:35,019
I am as fit as a bloody fiddle.
296
00:31:35,102 --> 00:31:36,395
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
297
00:31:36,478 --> 00:31:37,688
What's your name again?
298
00:31:37,771 --> 00:31:40,482
- Tusker!
- Oh, sorry. Okay.
299
00:31:40,566 --> 00:31:42,276
- How are you?
- I'm good.
300
00:31:42,359 --> 00:31:43,903
- Good to see you.
- Nice to see you.
301
00:31:43,986 --> 00:31:45,404
Good timing.
Just put the kettle on.
302
00:31:45,487 --> 00:31:46,697
- Great.
- Good journey?
303
00:31:46,780 --> 00:31:49,283
Yes, yes, er, it was seamless.
304
00:32:19,855 --> 00:32:21,231
He's okay.
305
00:32:22,191 --> 00:32:23,291
We're okay.
306
00:32:24,485 --> 00:32:25,585
Are you?
307
00:32:30,282 --> 00:32:32,660
We need to have a proper chat
about your plans.
308
00:32:32,743 --> 00:32:34,703
I mean,
309
00:32:34,787 --> 00:32:37,206
have you thought some more
about getting help?
310
00:32:37,289 --> 00:32:39,124
Someone to take
the pressure off you a bit.
311
00:32:39,208 --> 00:32:40,308
I mean,
312
00:32:40,334 --> 00:32:41,734
even if it's just a few days
a week,
313
00:32:41,794 --> 00:32:42,896
it might make
all the difference.
314
00:32:42,920 --> 00:32:45,339
Do you honestly think he would
get on board with that?
315
00:32:46,298 --> 00:32:48,300
- Fat chance.
- Okay.
316
00:32:48,384 --> 00:32:49,843
Anyway, we're not there yet.
317
00:32:50,803 --> 00:32:51,903
Yeah, but what...
318
00:32:54,264 --> 00:32:56,058
He's adapting.
319
00:32:56,141 --> 00:32:57,535
And trying to keep control
of things.
320
00:32:57,559 --> 00:32:59,103
His independence, you know.
321
00:33:01,814 --> 00:33:02,940
Is he still writing?
322
00:33:04,858 --> 00:33:06,819
Oh, that's good.
That's really good.
323
00:33:07,945 --> 00:33:09,405
You know, planning
this little trip
324
00:33:09,488 --> 00:33:11,573
has really put a spring
in his step.
325
00:33:13,075 --> 00:33:14,368
Ever since this idea came up,
326
00:33:14,451 --> 00:33:15,703
the recital,
327
00:33:15,786 --> 00:33:17,826
he hasn't stopped talking
about it. Dog with a bone.
328
00:33:28,132 --> 00:33:29,852
I don't think I'm doing this
very well, sis.
329
00:33:31,635 --> 00:33:34,304
Hey. You are.
330
00:33:34,388 --> 00:33:35,488
It's my turn now,
331
00:33:35,556 --> 00:33:37,099
- and I just...
- Hello.
332
00:33:38,392 --> 00:33:41,103
- Hello.
- Hi..
333
00:33:41,186 --> 00:33:44,064
So, we're sleeping in the van.
It's easier.
334
00:33:44,148 --> 00:33:46,608
No. We're gonna stay
in your old room.
335
00:33:46,692 --> 00:33:47,792
What?
336
00:33:47,818 --> 00:33:49,421
- What do you mean?
- It's made up for you.
337
00:33:49,445 --> 00:33:51,363
Yeah. I thought you knew that.
338
00:33:54,366 --> 00:33:56,285
Right. So, I'll just go
and get the bags, then.
339
00:33:56,368 --> 00:33:58,037
- It'll be romantic.
- Yes.
340
00:33:59,580 --> 00:34:00,680
I'll give you a hand.
341
00:34:00,706 --> 00:34:02,249
Don't know why I plan anything.
342
00:34:05,544 --> 00:34:08,714
Mm. Thank you for this, Lil.
343
00:34:08,797 --> 00:34:10,966
Oh, I've been looking forward
to it for weeks.
344
00:34:11,050 --> 00:34:13,427
- Me too.
- Is it all still a... Mm...
345
00:34:13,510 --> 00:34:18,140
Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Shh.
Mum's the word.
346
00:34:18,223 --> 00:34:22,061
You always seem somehow to
get your own way, don't you?
347
00:34:22,144 --> 00:34:24,605
- Oh, come on, it's cosy.
- No, it's ridiculous.
348
00:34:24,688 --> 00:34:26,408
- No, it's not. It's nice.
- It is. Come on,
349
00:34:26,482 --> 00:34:28,275
you're in the middle
of the fucking bed.
350
00:34:28,358 --> 00:34:31,236
I am not... I am on the edge.
351
00:34:31,320 --> 00:34:33,947
Now I'm more on the edge.
352
00:34:37,951 --> 00:34:39,387
- Are you okay?
- That's it! I'm sleeping
353
00:34:39,411 --> 00:34:41,014
- in the darn van.
- No, you... No, no, no.
354
00:34:41,038 --> 00:34:42,289
Come on. Come on. Come on.
355
00:34:42,372 --> 00:34:43,767
Come over here.
Come here. Come here.
356
00:34:43,791 --> 00:34:45,911
- Yeah, well, move over a bit.
- All right, all right.
357
00:34:49,213 --> 00:34:50,982
Come here, come here.
Come here. I'll keep you in.
358
00:34:51,006 --> 00:34:52,192
I just hope you're entertained.
359
00:34:52,216 --> 00:34:53,316
I'll be like a little...
360
00:34:53,342 --> 00:34:55,677
little rail for you
like kids have.
361
00:34:55,761 --> 00:34:57,513
There you go. Bed rail.
362
00:34:57,596 --> 00:34:58,597
- Here we go.
- I can't...
363
00:34:58,680 --> 00:34:59,991
- Is it better?
- Just give me some...
364
00:35:00,015 --> 00:35:03,393
- I can't breathe.
- I was trying to stop you...
365
00:35:07,064 --> 00:35:09,125
Well, I'm sure it'll be
fine, but as you know, I've...
366
00:35:09,149 --> 00:35:11,235
I've not done one
for quite a while. Yes.
367
00:35:13,904 --> 00:35:15,572
Great, well, we're staying, er,
368
00:35:15,656 --> 00:35:17,533
somewhere nearby
for the weekend,
369
00:35:17,616 --> 00:35:20,369
so if I... if I just
drive over on Sunday...
370
00:35:20,452 --> 00:35:22,996
Are you selling?
371
00:35:23,080 --> 00:35:28,335
Alright. Well, looking forward.
Thank you.
372
00:35:35,551 --> 00:35:37,010
Good girl.
373
00:35:55,696 --> 00:35:58,365
Hey, all right, all right.
I got it. I got it.
374
00:35:58,448 --> 00:36:00,409
- Mm.
- Yes.
375
00:36:00,492 --> 00:36:02,369
I knew I'd be successful
enough one day
376
00:36:02,452 --> 00:36:05,122
to have my own dresser.
377
00:36:05,205 --> 00:36:06,599
Yeah, well, this is tricky,
you know?
378
00:36:06,623 --> 00:36:08,834
There you go.
379
00:36:22,931 --> 00:36:24,308
Remember that New Year's walk?
380
00:36:26,268 --> 00:36:27,477
When Charlotte was a baby?
381
00:36:29,521 --> 00:36:30,647
When Lilly got us lost?
382
00:36:30,731 --> 00:36:33,150
Er, no, Lilly didn't
get us lost, you got us lost.
383
00:36:33,233 --> 00:36:34,526
- No, I didn't.
- Mm-hmm.
384
00:36:34,610 --> 00:36:35,986
I...
385
00:36:36,069 --> 00:36:37,863
Well, I thought Clive was
gonna have to call
386
00:36:37,946 --> 00:36:39,615
an air ambulance.
He was so hungover.
387
00:36:40,866 --> 00:36:42,618
He was hungover.
388
00:36:53,045 --> 00:36:55,047
I found a place online
a few days ago,
389
00:36:55,130 --> 00:36:56,548
it could be great for us,
I think.
390
00:36:58,091 --> 00:36:59,593
I'll show it to you
when we get back.
391
00:37:03,096 --> 00:37:06,308
It's a bungalow.
It's right in Holtenby.
392
00:37:06,391 --> 00:37:07,893
It's so close to town.
393
00:37:12,064 --> 00:37:13,607
We need to plan, Tusker.
394
00:37:19,571 --> 00:37:21,448
We're not moving, Sam.
395
00:37:21,531 --> 00:37:25,202
You know,
somewhere better suited.
396
00:37:25,285 --> 00:37:27,454
- To what?
- It'll make it much easier.
397
00:37:29,665 --> 00:37:31,416
No.
398
00:37:31,500 --> 00:37:34,336
Home is home and
that's where we're staying.
399
00:37:34,419 --> 00:37:35,688
What actual difference
does it make?
400
00:37:35,712 --> 00:37:37,315
- No. It's our place.
- Home can be anywhere
401
00:37:37,339 --> 00:37:39,379
- as long as it's us.
- We made it the way we... No.
402
00:37:40,676 --> 00:37:41,969
I'm gonna do this concert.
403
00:37:43,136 --> 00:37:45,222
Then I'm gonna call it a day.
404
00:37:45,305 --> 00:37:47,015
- Properly this time.
- No.
405
00:37:47,099 --> 00:37:48,475
I don't want you to do that.
406
00:37:48,558 --> 00:37:50,435
Well, it's not about me.
407
00:37:50,519 --> 00:37:51,520
It's about us.
408
00:37:51,603 --> 00:37:54,731
No, but that's not fair
to you, and I won't let you.
409
00:37:54,815 --> 00:37:56,108
Yes, but I want to.
410
00:37:56,191 --> 00:37:57,776
- I want to do this.
- No. Nope.
411
00:37:57,859 --> 00:37:58,959
No, I want to be with you.
412
00:37:58,986 --> 00:38:00,821
I want to be with you
every moment.
413
00:38:00,904 --> 00:38:02,197
Shh. All right...
414
00:38:06,368 --> 00:38:08,328
I want to be with you
every moment.
415
00:38:11,081 --> 00:38:12,181
It's important.
416
00:38:29,558 --> 00:38:32,102
Lilly must be having
people over or something.
417
00:38:36,940 --> 00:38:38,817
So many cars.
418
00:38:38,900 --> 00:38:40,235
Come on. What's going on?
419
00:38:41,361 --> 00:38:42,779
That's it. Where'd they go?
420
00:38:46,700 --> 00:38:47,868
Lilly?
421
00:38:50,370 --> 00:38:51,470
Clive?
422
00:38:55,459 --> 00:38:58,378
Surprise!
423
00:38:59,338 --> 00:39:00,839
I thought we'd have a party!
424
00:39:06,303 --> 00:39:07,512
Yeah!
425
00:39:08,764 --> 00:39:10,140
You did it!
426
00:39:10,223 --> 00:39:13,101
It was everywhere...
427
00:39:30,535 --> 00:39:32,329
- Can I join you?
- Sure.
428
00:39:38,418 --> 00:39:40,670
Sorry, I had to get out
of there. I can't, erm...
429
00:39:41,922 --> 00:39:43,590
Sometimes it's difficult
to be around
430
00:39:43,673 --> 00:39:45,675
a lot of people these days.
It's a bit...
431
00:39:49,054 --> 00:39:50,722
- Take your time.
- Mm-hmm.
432
00:39:59,314 --> 00:40:01,358
So you'll take care of him,
right?
433
00:40:07,906 --> 00:40:09,006
Of course.
434
00:40:16,331 --> 00:40:17,457
Thank you.
435
00:40:28,635 --> 00:40:30,095
Tusker took me to Japan...
436
00:40:30,178 --> 00:40:31,596
- Oh.
- ...when we first met.
437
00:40:31,680 --> 00:40:33,598
We used to travel
quite a bit back in the day.
438
00:40:33,682 --> 00:40:34,933
- Yeah.
- Really?
439
00:40:35,016 --> 00:40:36,327
We haven't always been
this boring.
440
00:40:36,351 --> 00:40:38,061
Not this boring.
441
00:40:38,145 --> 00:40:40,272
- Or have we?
- You have.
442
00:40:40,355 --> 00:40:42,649
No, it's probably me.
Yeah, just me.
443
00:40:42,732 --> 00:40:44,109
When are we gonna see it?
444
00:40:45,277 --> 00:40:47,195
- See what?
- "See what"?
445
00:40:47,279 --> 00:40:48,530
This new book of yours.
446
00:40:48,613 --> 00:40:50,782
Oh! It's coming, it's coming.
447
00:40:50,866 --> 00:40:52,576
- It's taken you long enough.
- Paul!
448
00:40:52,659 --> 00:40:55,078
Well, er, what do you care?
You never read them, anyway.
449
00:40:55,162 --> 00:40:56,705
Well, maybe I'll start.
450
00:40:56,788 --> 00:40:58,540
No, you'd never get past
the first chapter.
451
00:40:58,623 --> 00:40:59,863
It's far too high-brow for you.
452
00:40:59,916 --> 00:41:01,084
Well, he's got a point.
453
00:41:01,168 --> 00:41:02,794
You know, he's almost finished.
454
00:41:02,878 --> 00:41:04,296
What's it about?
455
00:41:04,379 --> 00:41:06,673
Oh, don't ask him that.
456
00:41:06,756 --> 00:41:08,234
He won't even let me read
a single word,
457
00:41:08,258 --> 00:41:10,093
and I used to proofread
everything.
458
00:41:10,177 --> 00:41:11,277
I'll let you read it.
459
00:41:11,344 --> 00:41:13,013
So, where are you going
460
00:41:13,096 --> 00:41:15,015
in that bloody great thing
out there, anyway?
461
00:41:15,098 --> 00:41:17,267
Well, he has a gig.
462
00:41:17,350 --> 00:41:20,061
Yeah, he's practically
frog-marching me there to do it.
463
00:41:20,145 --> 00:41:21,245
No, I'm not.
464
00:41:21,271 --> 00:41:22,790
I'm going to see
if I'm still any bloody good.
465
00:41:22,814 --> 00:41:25,275
- You will be.
- You will be wonderful.
466
00:41:25,358 --> 00:41:27,861
- Will I? Will I?
- Yes.
467
00:41:27,944 --> 00:41:29,529
- And where's our invite?
- Mm..
468
00:41:29,613 --> 00:41:31,907
Em... Let's just see
how it goes.
469
00:41:31,990 --> 00:41:33,783
Chances are I'm a bit rusty.
470
00:41:35,076 --> 00:41:36,176
So...
471
00:41:38,330 --> 00:41:40,123
I would like to know
472
00:41:40,207 --> 00:41:42,501
how my favourite
goddaughter's doing.
473
00:41:42,584 --> 00:41:44,711
And are you seeing anyone?
474
00:41:45,879 --> 00:41:47,839
Maybe.
475
00:41:47,923 --> 00:41:51,051
- She's in love.
- Really?
476
00:41:51,134 --> 00:41:54,095
Tell me. Who is it?
I wanna know everything.
477
00:41:54,179 --> 00:41:57,098
He's just a guy.
I've known him for ages.
478
00:41:57,182 --> 00:41:58,862
He's tryin' to write
a novel too, actually.
479
00:41:58,892 --> 00:41:59,992
- Oh, really?
- Mm.
480
00:42:00,018 --> 00:42:01,394
Oh, that's wonderful!
481
00:42:01,478 --> 00:42:03,063
That's great! Wait, is it good?
482
00:42:03,146 --> 00:42:04,314
Is it better than mine?
483
00:42:04,397 --> 00:42:07,192
Tell him to stop immediately.
I never liked that boy.
484
00:42:07,275 --> 00:42:10,111
Terrible child. Yes.
485
00:42:10,195 --> 00:42:11,738
Well, thank you so much.
486
00:42:11,821 --> 00:42:13,406
I don't know
if I have any cash on me.
487
00:42:13,490 --> 00:42:16,243
Do you take a credit card?
488
00:42:18,328 --> 00:42:22,874
I'd like to make a speech.
489
00:42:28,588 --> 00:42:29,839
I, er...
490
00:42:31,258 --> 00:42:32,358
Sorry.
491
00:42:34,844 --> 00:42:36,596
Erm, I'm just...
492
00:42:36,680 --> 00:42:38,807
I'm very happy to have everybody
493
00:42:38,890 --> 00:42:42,769
here together after a very
long period of time, it seems,
494
00:42:42,852 --> 00:42:45,605
and I really appreciate you,
495
00:42:45,689 --> 00:42:49,025
erm, making the effort to come.
496
00:42:49,109 --> 00:42:51,528
I'm very excited. Erm...
497
00:42:51,611 --> 00:42:53,113
And...
498
00:42:57,993 --> 00:42:59,661
Sorry, just, it's...
This gets a little...
499
00:43:00,870 --> 00:43:02,289
Sorry...
500
00:43:03,498 --> 00:43:05,542
Um... Well, maybe...
501
00:43:05,625 --> 00:43:07,627
- maybe Sam will do it for me.
- Yes, I'd love to.
502
00:43:07,711 --> 00:43:09,796
Why don't you do it for me,
as I can't.
503
00:43:09,879 --> 00:43:11,006
Yes, of course.
504
00:43:15,760 --> 00:43:17,304
My... My big moment.
505
00:43:18,513 --> 00:43:20,348
Thanks, Tusker.
506
00:43:20,432 --> 00:43:22,434
Erm... "Well,
thank you all for coming.
507
00:43:23,518 --> 00:43:25,812
Er, looking around me,
508
00:43:25,895 --> 00:43:28,231
I'm reminded how lucky
we all are"
509
00:43:28,315 --> 00:43:29,691
to have each other.
510
00:43:29,774 --> 00:43:31,443
There's so much history here
in this room
511
00:43:31,526 --> 00:43:33,778
and that's a really
beautiful thing.
512
00:43:33,862 --> 00:43:37,616
Er, Lilly and Clive,
thanks for having us all."
513
00:43:37,699 --> 00:43:38,825
It's a pleasure.
514
00:43:41,286 --> 00:43:44,998
Er, "This place is where Sam
grew up,
515
00:43:45,081 --> 00:43:47,709
but it's also always felt
like home to me too,
516
00:43:47,792 --> 00:43:50,253
since I crossed the pond
all those years ago.
517
00:43:51,254 --> 00:43:53,256
So many happy times here.
518
00:43:53,340 --> 00:43:54,440
As the years go by,
519
00:43:54,507 --> 00:43:55,884
it seems to get harder
and harder
520
00:43:55,967 --> 00:43:57,302
to stay in touch, doesn't it?
521
00:43:58,595 --> 00:43:59,804
So it's times like these
522
00:43:59,888 --> 00:44:01,973
when we are allowed to remember
523
00:44:02,057 --> 00:44:04,059
how important friends
and family are.
524
00:44:05,268 --> 00:44:06,394
Loyal.
525
00:44:07,562 --> 00:44:09,064
A comforting arm in a...
526
00:44:10,774 --> 00:44:12,067
a lonely moment,
527
00:44:13,068 --> 00:44:14,361
a bed for the night,
528
00:44:15,278 --> 00:44:16,696
someone to share a bottle with."
529
00:44:18,573 --> 00:44:19,866
"I guess in time,
530
00:44:20,742 --> 00:44:22,243
we will need these things
531
00:44:22,327 --> 00:44:24,162
more than we ever have.
532
00:44:24,245 --> 00:44:27,374
Now, as most of you will know,
533
00:44:27,457 --> 00:44:30,877
I am slowly losing my ability
to remember
534
00:44:30,960 --> 00:44:32,504
and to do certain things.
535
00:44:34,339 --> 00:44:35,507
Not big things,
536
00:44:36,883 --> 00:44:39,803
but it does mean
it probably won't be long
537
00:44:39,886 --> 00:44:41,364
before I'll totally forget who
Tim is,
538
00:44:41,388 --> 00:44:43,181
which I've been trying
my hardest to do
539
00:44:43,264 --> 00:44:44,557
for about 30 years, anyway."
540
00:44:51,606 --> 00:44:53,775
"Now, there will come a time,
541
00:44:53,858 --> 00:44:56,361
when I will forget who is
even doing the forgetting.
542
00:44:57,612 --> 00:44:58,905
And then, well,
543
00:44:58,988 --> 00:45:01,116
I'll probably not
have a care in the world.
544
00:45:02,450 --> 00:45:03,576
But until then,
545
00:45:03,660 --> 00:45:06,663
I'll be able to think back to
the times we've all shared,
546
00:45:06,746 --> 00:45:09,958
times like these,
and that's a great help."
547
00:45:13,545 --> 00:45:14,645
To friendship!
548
00:45:14,713 --> 00:45:16,840
To friendship!
549
00:45:42,031 --> 00:45:44,075
"But we all wouldn't be here,
550
00:45:44,159 --> 00:45:47,036
and I definitely
wouldn't be here"
551
00:45:47,120 --> 00:45:49,205
if it weren't for this man
next to me.
552
00:45:56,755 --> 00:45:58,715
He's the best thing
that has ever happened to me,
553
00:45:58,798 --> 00:46:00,467
and I don't know
what I'd do without him.
554
00:46:02,552 --> 00:46:04,095
Just look around this room, Sam.
555
00:46:05,263 --> 00:46:06,765
So many people
who care about you.
556
00:46:08,767 --> 00:46:10,059
Never forget that.
557
00:46:11,644 --> 00:46:14,606
So, I'd just like to say,
'Thank you, Sam,
558
00:46:14,689 --> 00:46:15,899
for being my saviour,
559
00:46:16,483 --> 00:46:17,583
my beloved,
560
00:46:17,609 --> 00:46:20,445
and the best friend anyone
could ever wish for.'"
561
00:46:20,528 --> 00:46:21,696
Yeah.
562
00:46:25,867 --> 00:46:28,036
- To Sam!
- To Sam!
563
00:46:30,205 --> 00:46:31,706
To Sam.
564
00:46:57,315 --> 00:47:00,109
Can't believe Rick is here.
565
00:47:00,193 --> 00:47:01,879
No, neither can I.
You know, he's been, er...
566
00:47:01,903 --> 00:47:04,280
Mm-hmm. Twice.
567
00:47:04,364 --> 00:47:06,032
He's a dark horse.
568
00:47:06,115 --> 00:47:08,993
Literally. Never even spoke to
a woman when we knew him,
569
00:47:09,077 --> 00:47:11,871
let alone get near enough
to be divorced by two of them.
570
00:47:11,955 --> 00:47:13,414
Always the quiet ones, eh?
571
00:47:21,339 --> 00:47:22,841
We all miss you, you know, Sam?
572
00:47:26,344 --> 00:47:27,444
Yeah, I'm sorry, Tim.
573
00:47:27,512 --> 00:47:28,612
Oh, don't be.
574
00:47:28,638 --> 00:47:30,616
I don't mean like... I didn't
mean it like that at all.
575
00:47:30,640 --> 00:47:32,559
- It's just been a bit...
- No, of course.
576
00:47:32,642 --> 00:47:34,352
Of course, it has.
577
00:47:40,859 --> 00:47:42,277
- He never stops, does he?
- Mm.
578
00:47:49,367 --> 00:47:50,994
Thank you for coming
all this way, Tim.
579
00:47:51,077 --> 00:47:53,663
You kidding? I wouldn't have
missed this for the world.
580
00:47:53,746 --> 00:47:56,207
Plus, the fact Tusker would
probably have me killed.
581
00:47:56,291 --> 00:47:57,792
Yes, he can be very insistent.
582
00:47:57,876 --> 00:47:58,976
Yes, you're telling me.
583
00:47:59,002 --> 00:48:00,102
And how long has he been
584
00:48:00,169 --> 00:48:01,480
fricking plotting all this,
anyway?
585
00:48:01,504 --> 00:48:04,048
Months!
586
00:48:04,841 --> 00:48:06,551
Oh, what a speech, eh?
587
00:48:07,719 --> 00:48:09,596
Anyone would think
he was a writer.
588
00:48:13,099 --> 00:48:15,894
I hear he's finding it
a bit, er...
589
00:48:15,977 --> 00:48:17,812
yeah, a bit tougher,
er, recently?
590
00:48:17,896 --> 00:48:21,524
Erm, I mean, that's only to be
expected, of course, but, er...
591
00:48:21,608 --> 00:48:22,859
Who told you that?
592
00:48:24,110 --> 00:48:25,612
Er, well, he did. Erm...
593
00:48:25,695 --> 00:48:27,447
He said, er... Erm...
594
00:48:29,240 --> 00:48:31,159
He said, when he tries to
595
00:48:31,242 --> 00:48:35,038
put pen to paper, he... he...
he can't.
596
00:48:36,331 --> 00:48:38,499
Sam, I'm so sorry. I didn't...
597
00:48:40,543 --> 00:48:42,921
Sorry, I think I just...
I need a bit of air.
598
00:48:43,004 --> 00:48:44,005
- Yes.
- But, er,
599
00:48:44,088 --> 00:48:45,188
we'll be fine, you know.
600
00:48:45,214 --> 00:48:46,883
Okay. All right.
601
00:48:46,966 --> 00:48:49,552
- Thanks, Sam. Sorry, Sam.
- No.
602
00:49:07,737 --> 00:49:10,490
I haven't spoken to Sam
about it yet.
603
00:49:10,573 --> 00:49:13,785
He'll understand. He will.
604
00:49:16,204 --> 00:49:17,389
Mum should never have stayed
here so long
605
00:49:17,413 --> 00:49:18,513
in the first place.
606
00:49:20,583 --> 00:49:22,377
Hard to let go, I suppose.
607
00:49:22,460 --> 00:49:25,129
It's okay. Yes.
608
00:49:25,213 --> 00:49:26,464
It's a fresh start.
609
00:49:26,547 --> 00:49:28,549
- Yes.
- It's a good thing.
610
00:49:28,633 --> 00:49:31,719
- I'll miss it.
- Yes.
611
00:49:31,803 --> 00:49:33,221
But being sad something is gone
612
00:49:33,304 --> 00:49:36,724
just means it was great
while it was there, right?
613
00:49:40,853 --> 00:49:43,106
Come stay again
before that though, eh?
614
00:49:43,189 --> 00:49:46,150
Yes, of course. Yes. Yes.
615
00:49:46,234 --> 00:49:50,154
And you have to have a, erm,
housewarming party.
616
00:49:50,238 --> 00:49:51,614
- Yep.
- Right? In the new place.
617
00:49:51,698 --> 00:49:55,159
- Okay.
- Get this lot together again.
618
00:49:55,243 --> 00:49:58,371
Sam would love that.
So you should do that.
619
00:50:03,626 --> 00:50:05,753
I, erm...
620
00:50:05,837 --> 00:50:07,588
I was reading
about a new medicine
621
00:50:07,672 --> 00:50:09,632
- the other day.
- Mm-hmm. Mm.
622
00:50:09,716 --> 00:50:12,260
Er, so I kept
the clipping for you.
623
00:50:12,343 --> 00:50:14,178
It was something about
blood thinning tablets
624
00:50:14,262 --> 00:50:15,781
they give to people
with heart problems.
625
00:50:15,805 --> 00:50:19,767
They said that, apparently,
it can be really beneficial...
626
00:50:19,851 --> 00:50:22,103
- Oh. Yes.
- ...if you like...
627
00:50:22,186 --> 00:50:24,647
- Give it to me. Yes.
- Yeah?
628
00:50:24,731 --> 00:50:26,607
- Okay.
- Thanks.
629
00:50:33,906 --> 00:50:35,533
You know what the hard part is?
630
00:50:40,872 --> 00:50:43,750
It's that you're...
you're just...
631
00:50:43,833 --> 00:50:45,626
you're not supposed to
mourn someone
632
00:50:46,794 --> 00:50:48,421
while they're still alive.
633
00:50:50,590 --> 00:50:53,885
And, you know,
sharing a space with them,
634
00:50:53,968 --> 00:50:55,068
sharing a bed with them,
635
00:50:55,136 --> 00:50:56,763
- is just not fair.
- He... He's not.
636
00:50:56,846 --> 00:50:57,972
- It's not...
- He's not.
637
00:50:58,056 --> 00:50:59,296
Well, he must be, because I am.
638
00:51:03,269 --> 00:51:05,605
You're still you, Tusker.
639
00:51:05,688 --> 00:51:07,440
You're still the guy
he fell in love with.
640
00:51:10,109 --> 00:51:11,209
No, I'm not.
641
00:51:13,780 --> 00:51:15,156
I just look like him.
642
00:51:20,953 --> 00:51:22,580
Which is a shame.
643
00:55:14,228 --> 00:55:15,354
Pick a patch of sky.
644
00:55:15,438 --> 00:55:17,690
that doesn't
have any stars in it.
645
00:55:19,567 --> 00:55:21,152
- Okay.
- Alright, you got it?
646
00:55:21,235 --> 00:55:22,361
- Yeah.
- Okay.
647
00:55:22,445 --> 00:55:24,322
Now make a circle, you know,
648
00:55:24,405 --> 00:55:26,657
with your thumb
and your forefinger,
649
00:55:26,741 --> 00:55:29,368
like this. Okay?
Look through it,
650
00:55:29,452 --> 00:55:31,245
and imagine that
that's a telescope,
651
00:55:31,329 --> 00:55:34,498
but an incredibly powerful
telescope.
652
00:55:34,582 --> 00:55:37,209
What you would see would be,
653
00:55:38,085 --> 00:55:41,088
like, a million galaxies.
654
00:55:42,590 --> 00:55:43,591
That's bloody loads.
655
00:55:43,674 --> 00:55:47,094
Yes. Yes, that is bloody loads.
656
00:55:47,178 --> 00:55:48,387
But what's even more amazing
657
00:55:48,471 --> 00:55:52,641
is that your body is made out of
658
00:55:54,810 --> 00:55:56,354
bits of those stars.
659
00:55:56,437 --> 00:55:57,537
What do you mean?
660
00:55:57,563 --> 00:56:02,068
When a star gets really old,
okay,
661
00:56:02,151 --> 00:56:04,362
it runs out of fuel
662
00:56:04,445 --> 00:56:07,156
and it explodes,
like a firework.
663
00:56:07,239 --> 00:56:08,407
- A massive one?
- Yes.
664
00:56:08,491 --> 00:56:11,494
A massive, massive, massive one.
665
00:56:12,453 --> 00:56:17,041
And then that star has died,
666
00:56:17,124 --> 00:56:19,502
and it becomes really,
really bright
667
00:56:19,585 --> 00:56:22,421
and it shoots out
all of this stuff,
668
00:56:22,505 --> 00:56:25,424
and all that stuff
travels through space
669
00:56:25,508 --> 00:56:26,610
over years, and years,
and years,
670
00:56:26,634 --> 00:56:27,861
and years, and years, and years,
671
00:56:27,885 --> 00:56:29,165
and years, and years, and years,
672
00:56:29,220 --> 00:56:30,320
and years, and years,
673
00:56:30,388 --> 00:56:32,807
and eventually,
674
00:56:33,599 --> 00:56:37,061
it's what makes us.
675
00:56:39,355 --> 00:56:41,565
So, we're all like stars, then?
676
00:56:42,316 --> 00:56:44,318
Yeah.
677
00:56:44,402 --> 00:56:48,280
But what's even
more incredible is, this ear,
678
00:56:49,740 --> 00:56:53,911
could have come from
a completely different star
679
00:56:53,994 --> 00:56:57,123
in a totally different galaxy
680
00:56:57,206 --> 00:56:58,707
than this ear.
681
00:56:58,791 --> 00:57:00,918
I don't understand.
682
00:57:02,253 --> 00:57:03,671
Nah, it doesn't matter.
683
00:57:06,674 --> 00:57:10,052
You know, a very wise man
once said that,
684
00:57:10,136 --> 00:57:16,058
"We will not starve
for lack of wonders,
685
00:57:16,851 --> 00:57:19,728
but from lack of wonder.
686
00:57:20,563 --> 00:57:21,730
What does that mean?
687
00:57:24,150 --> 00:57:27,570
It means you must
always ask questions.
688
00:57:27,653 --> 00:57:29,321
Mum says I ask
too many questions.
689
00:57:29,405 --> 00:57:31,073
Really?
690
00:57:31,157 --> 00:57:32,700
Never stop asking questions,
691
00:57:33,701 --> 00:57:35,161
no matter what your mother says.
692
00:57:36,412 --> 00:57:38,664
You must never stop
asking questions.
693
00:57:38,747 --> 00:57:40,708
- It's very important.
- Okay.
694
00:57:40,791 --> 00:57:44,378
- Okay? You promise me?
- Promise.
695
00:57:51,469 --> 00:57:54,054
Bye, guys. Bye.
696
01:01:09,291 --> 01:01:10,501
Hello!
697
01:01:10,584 --> 01:01:12,503
- Hello!
- Hi, Mr Mulliner?
698
01:01:12,586 --> 01:01:15,631
- Yes, hi. Sorry we're late.
- It's okay.
699
01:01:15,714 --> 01:01:17,716
I'm Rachel. I'm the one
you spoke to on the phone.
700
01:01:17,800 --> 01:01:19,259
Yes, nice to meet you.
701
01:01:30,104 --> 01:01:31,397
Yeah. Oh, it's great.
702
01:01:31,480 --> 01:01:32,731
Did you say you were up here
703
01:01:32,815 --> 01:01:33,917
on to a concert or something?
704
01:01:33,941 --> 01:01:36,652
Er, yes. Tomorrow,
at Guildhall. Yeah.
705
01:01:40,781 --> 01:01:42,199
Well, it's a beautiful spot.
706
01:01:55,713 --> 01:01:56,813
Great.
707
01:02:11,395 --> 01:02:13,731
Bye-bye, thank you.
708
01:02:20,779 --> 01:02:22,573
Isn't this place great?
709
01:02:24,491 --> 01:02:25,591
It's fantastic.
710
01:02:27,619 --> 01:02:28,746
How is this?
711
01:02:29,747 --> 01:02:31,331
Is it going to be okay for you?
712
01:02:35,252 --> 01:02:38,797
Oh, that doesn't sound...
so good.
713
01:02:42,593 --> 01:02:44,571
What do you think? I mean,
I don't... I can't tell.
714
01:02:44,595 --> 01:02:45,929
You're the expert, but...
715
01:02:54,062 --> 01:02:55,856
All right.
Well, I think I'm gonna go up
716
01:02:55,939 --> 01:02:58,192
and have a lie down,
and I'll let you practice.
717
01:02:58,275 --> 01:03:01,361
Why don't you do
some writing, Tusker?
718
01:03:01,445 --> 01:03:03,447
Quiet place like this,
you could finish your book.
719
01:03:04,698 --> 01:03:06,909
No. Not right now,
I don't really want to.
720
01:03:06,992 --> 01:03:09,870
No, I... I think you should.
I want you to.
721
01:03:09,953 --> 01:03:11,513
- Yes.
- I'll go get your writing stuff.
722
01:03:12,539 --> 01:03:14,958
No. No. I'm fine. Really.
723
01:03:15,042 --> 01:03:16,394
All right, let's do
another tape, then.
724
01:03:16,418 --> 01:03:18,458
Why don't we do... Why don't
we do one of our tapes?
725
01:03:19,296 --> 01:03:21,590
No, I don't feel like it.
726
01:03:21,673 --> 01:03:22,773
- I don't.
- I do.
727
01:03:51,411 --> 01:03:53,205
All right, let's do
728
01:03:53,288 --> 01:03:54,498
it over here. Come on.
729
01:03:56,500 --> 01:03:57,600
All right.
730
01:04:12,641 --> 01:04:14,101
My name is Tusker Mulliner.
731
01:04:14,184 --> 01:04:16,436
No. Sam, no. No. I don't...
No. I don't want...
732
01:04:16,520 --> 01:04:17,980
What I am about to do
is my choice...
733
01:04:18,063 --> 01:04:19,541
- No! No! I don't...
- ...and no one else's.
734
01:04:19,565 --> 01:04:22,109
- Today is the 25th of October.
- Fuck.
735
01:04:22,192 --> 01:04:24,987
And I'm about to take
my own life.
736
01:04:28,657 --> 01:04:31,368
I have chosen to die now.
737
01:04:32,953 --> 01:04:35,914
I do not wish to become
a burden to Sam
738
01:04:35,998 --> 01:04:37,583
or anyone else.
739
01:04:39,543 --> 01:04:41,628
I'm here completely alone,
740
01:04:41,712 --> 01:04:44,214
and I am doing this in secret,
741
01:04:44,298 --> 01:04:47,050
with no assistance
from anyone else.
742
01:04:51,597 --> 01:04:54,641
My dear Sam, I just wanna say
743
01:04:54,725 --> 01:04:58,645
that I love you
with all my heart,
744
01:04:58,729 --> 01:05:00,105
and I'm...
745
01:05:10,365 --> 01:05:13,327
I'm gonna go out
and take the dog for a walk,
746
01:05:13,410 --> 01:05:15,370
and when I get back,
I'm gonna cook us dinner.
747
01:05:20,208 --> 01:05:22,753
And then we're gonna pretend
none of this ever happened.
748
01:05:48,111 --> 01:05:49,446
We should use the van more.
749
01:05:51,031 --> 01:05:52,324
I mean,
750
01:05:52,407 --> 01:05:54,952
freedom is why we bought it.
We can go where we want.
751
01:05:55,035 --> 01:05:57,663
Europe maybe, if they'll still
fucking have us, that is.
752
01:05:57,746 --> 01:05:59,915
We can go back to that
place in Italy.
753
01:05:59,998 --> 01:06:01,667
We loved it there, you remember?
754
01:06:02,751 --> 01:06:03,877
Do you remember?
755
01:06:05,629 --> 01:06:08,882
Or... Or, erm,
the South of France.
756
01:06:08,966 --> 01:06:10,366
You always wanted to go
to Provence.
757
01:06:10,425 --> 01:06:11,426
And that wouldn't take long.
758
01:06:11,510 --> 01:06:12,904
We could stop off at that place
in Paris
759
01:06:12,928 --> 01:06:15,889
and eat at that, erm...
that bistro
760
01:06:15,973 --> 01:06:18,725
on Rue Saint-Benoît
that you liked.
761
01:06:18,809 --> 01:06:20,769
Fucking years ago now.
762
01:06:20,852 --> 01:06:23,438
Think about... Think about
being out of the city.
763
01:06:24,147 --> 01:06:25,941
No streetlights.
764
01:06:26,024 --> 01:06:27,192
Huh? There's no light...
765
01:06:28,402 --> 01:06:31,321
Er, what do you call it?
Pollution.
766
01:06:31,405 --> 01:06:32,906
- Sam...
- It's beautiful, you know.
767
01:06:32,990 --> 01:06:34,550
Probably don't even need
a telescope out here,
768
01:06:34,574 --> 01:06:35,701
you can just get out.
769
01:06:35,784 --> 01:06:37,762
Just get out there
and we'll finish this and, er...
770
01:06:37,786 --> 01:06:39,204
Sam.
771
01:06:44,584 --> 01:06:45,684
Do you remember...
772
01:06:48,672 --> 01:06:50,799
when we came back from
the doctor the first day?
773
01:06:52,217 --> 01:06:54,094
When we found out,
when we came home?
774
01:06:56,054 --> 01:06:57,347
And I said something to you?
775
01:06:59,266 --> 01:07:00,559
Do you remember what that was?
776
01:07:06,898 --> 01:07:08,275
I told you
no matter what happens,
777
01:07:08,358 --> 01:07:10,610
I did not wanna lose control
of my life.
778
01:07:15,198 --> 01:07:18,035
I'm losing control. Now.
779
01:07:26,084 --> 01:07:28,211
Where do you think
we're gonna be in six months?
780
01:07:28,295 --> 01:07:29,880
- Together.
- Or a year.
781
01:07:29,963 --> 01:07:32,090
Together. Still.
782
01:07:33,341 --> 01:07:35,218
What do you think it'll be like?
783
01:07:35,302 --> 01:07:36,595
- The same.
- No.
784
01:07:37,679 --> 01:07:39,931
No. It won't be.
785
01:07:42,350 --> 01:07:43,450
Okay?
786
01:07:47,773 --> 01:07:49,441
And I didn't tell you
787
01:07:49,524 --> 01:07:51,109
about what I've chosen to do
788
01:07:51,193 --> 01:07:54,196
because even if you knew
about it...
789
01:07:54,279 --> 01:07:55,530
Well, I know now, don't I?
790
01:07:56,823 --> 01:07:58,992
- Don't I?
- Mm-hmm.
791
01:08:01,828 --> 01:08:03,139
When they called
about the concert,
792
01:08:03,163 --> 01:08:05,290
I thought that was...
793
01:08:05,373 --> 01:08:07,459
It was the perfect opportunity
794
01:08:07,542 --> 01:08:11,963
because then, you could prove
795
01:08:12,047 --> 01:08:13,548
that you weren't with me
when I...
796
01:08:13,632 --> 01:08:14,758
No, no, no, no, no, no.
797
01:08:14,841 --> 01:08:16,441
Stop, we're not having
this conversation.
798
01:08:26,353 --> 01:08:27,813
- Sam.
- Let's dance.
799
01:08:27,896 --> 01:08:29,356
Sam.
800
01:08:29,439 --> 01:08:30,539
Let's dance.
801
01:08:30,565 --> 01:08:32,335
We don't dance any more, do we?
Just, come on.
802
01:08:32,359 --> 01:08:34,504
- No, I don't... No, no. Sam.
- Let's dance. Let's dance.
803
01:08:34,528 --> 01:08:36,279
Come on, we can still dance,
can't we?
804
01:08:36,363 --> 01:08:38,323
It's okay. Just...
805
01:08:40,575 --> 01:08:42,369
Sit down.
806
01:08:42,452 --> 01:08:44,871
Sit down. Just sit down.
807
01:09:15,068 --> 01:09:16,361
Okay.
808
01:09:26,580 --> 01:09:29,332
Do you think I'm not scared,
Tusker? Is that it?
809
01:09:29,416 --> 01:09:32,627
Do you think I don't spend
every single moment
810
01:09:32,711 --> 01:09:35,046
thinking about how am I gonna
cope when this gets worse?
811
01:09:36,673 --> 01:09:38,593
Every single hour of every
day since you got ill,
812
01:09:38,633 --> 01:09:39,819
that's going round in my head.
813
01:09:39,843 --> 01:09:41,136
Over, and over, and over.
814
01:09:42,179 --> 01:09:43,763
Am I strong enough? Can I do it?
815
01:09:45,682 --> 01:09:48,059
Can I live seeing you
not knowing what day it is,
816
01:09:48,143 --> 01:09:49,853
not knowing where we are,
817
01:09:49,936 --> 01:09:51,036
not knowing who I am?
818
01:09:56,568 --> 01:09:58,069
I know. I know.
819
01:10:01,948 --> 01:10:04,993
Or will it break me?
Will I just give up?
820
01:10:06,036 --> 01:10:07,537
Put you in a fucking home,
821
01:10:07,621 --> 01:10:09,247
visit you once a week.
Be done with it.
822
01:10:09,331 --> 01:10:10,431
Sit there, reading your
823
01:10:10,498 --> 01:10:11,938
favourite book to you,
knowing you...
824
01:10:19,174 --> 01:10:20,383
You know what I've decided?
825
01:10:22,302 --> 01:10:23,428
I'm strong enough.
826
01:10:25,472 --> 01:10:26,572
I'll be okay.
827
01:10:26,640 --> 01:10:28,433
And as long as there's breath
in my body,
828
01:10:28,516 --> 01:10:30,310
I will look after you,
I will care for you,
829
01:10:30,393 --> 01:10:31,728
I will wash you,
I will hold you,
830
01:10:31,811 --> 01:10:33,355
I will wipe your fucking arse,
831
01:10:33,438 --> 01:10:35,565
I will do my best to remind you
who I am,
832
01:10:35,649 --> 01:10:37,529
and what we meant
to each other before all this.
833
01:10:42,781 --> 01:10:46,117
I now think this is why I was
put here in the first place.
834
01:10:46,910 --> 01:10:48,036
It was for you.
835
01:10:50,121 --> 01:10:51,248
But I am scared.
836
01:10:51,331 --> 01:10:53,124
I mean, fucking terrified,
if you must know.
837
01:10:53,208 --> 01:10:54,209
And I never told you that.
838
01:10:54,292 --> 01:10:56,670
So, you're not the only one
with secrets, Tusker.
839
01:11:10,850 --> 01:11:12,227
But look what it's doing to you.
840
01:11:16,189 --> 01:11:17,315
And that's not fair.
841
01:11:17,399 --> 01:11:19,818
It's not about fair, is it?
It's about love.
842
01:11:21,152 --> 01:11:22,487
Is it selfish?
843
01:11:25,365 --> 01:11:28,285
Not to want to lose you?
Not to want to be alone?
844
01:11:28,368 --> 01:11:29,536
I don't wanna be alone.
845
01:11:32,414 --> 01:11:34,249
I know that. I know.
846
01:11:35,583 --> 01:11:36,683
But...
847
01:11:37,669 --> 01:11:41,548
I am dying.
848
01:11:41,631 --> 01:11:43,633
Don't let me off the hook!
849
01:11:45,593 --> 01:11:48,346
I want to do this.
850
01:11:48,430 --> 01:11:51,182
I want to see this through,
with you, to the end.
851
01:11:51,266 --> 01:11:52,684
That's my thing.
852
01:11:53,935 --> 01:11:55,186
It's all I've got left.
853
01:12:02,152 --> 01:12:03,361
No, it isn't, Sam.
854
01:12:05,071 --> 01:12:06,448
What if I just tell everyone,
then?
855
01:12:06,531 --> 01:12:08,658
What if I just shout it
from the fucking rooftops?
856
01:12:09,409 --> 01:12:10,535
What would you do then?
857
01:12:10,618 --> 01:12:11,887
We'd all be in trouble,
wouldn't we?
858
01:12:11,911 --> 01:12:13,455
We'd all be guilty.
859
01:12:13,538 --> 01:12:15,218
Or I could just drive away,
leave you here.
860
01:12:15,248 --> 01:12:17,500
Well, you couldn't do it then.
Could you?
861
01:12:17,584 --> 01:12:19,919
Cause you can't do anything
without me.
862
01:12:20,003 --> 01:12:21,338
You need me.
863
01:12:21,421 --> 01:12:22,756
Exactly.
864
01:12:25,967 --> 01:12:27,260
Exactly.
865
01:12:45,111 --> 01:12:46,529
I don't wanna be alone.
866
01:14:54,657 --> 01:14:56,159
I'm becoming a passenger.
867
01:14:59,787 --> 01:15:01,456
And I'm not a passenger.
868
01:15:07,545 --> 01:15:09,297
This thing is taking me
to a place
869
01:15:10,173 --> 01:15:11,508
where I don't want to go.
870
01:15:14,802 --> 01:15:17,055
And no one is going to be able
to bring me back.
871
01:15:19,933 --> 01:15:21,226
And...
872
01:15:22,602 --> 01:15:23,978
I can't.
873
01:15:25,271 --> 01:15:26,814
No, I can't do that.
874
01:15:32,820 --> 01:15:34,948
I knew something
was going on, all right.
875
01:15:37,617 --> 01:15:39,827
If I'm honest, I knew. I just,
you know...
876
01:15:39,911 --> 01:15:41,037
You don't spend all those
877
01:15:41,120 --> 01:15:44,332
years with someone without...
without noticing the little...
878
01:15:46,960 --> 01:15:49,587
Yeah. I know.
879
01:15:53,466 --> 01:15:55,093
I didn't wanna say anything.
880
01:15:55,176 --> 01:15:57,428
Just didn't want to admit
to myself
881
01:15:57,512 --> 01:15:59,722
that you knew it was getting
worse too.
882
01:16:09,274 --> 01:16:10,650
How long have...
883
01:16:16,447 --> 01:16:18,283
Christ, you even got me a dog?
884
01:16:19,784 --> 01:16:20,994
Fuck.
885
01:16:28,918 --> 01:16:31,004
Sam, you need to listen to me.
886
01:16:51,983 --> 01:16:53,568
I want to be remembered...
887
01:16:57,238 --> 01:16:58,740
for who I was,
888
01:17:00,783 --> 01:17:03,077
but not...
889
01:17:03,161 --> 01:17:05,163
for who I'm about to become.
890
01:17:11,044 --> 01:17:13,755
That's the only thing
I can control.
891
01:17:15,048 --> 01:17:17,467
And that's all I have left.
892
01:17:41,658 --> 01:17:43,076
What if it doesn't work?
893
01:17:47,121 --> 01:17:48,247
It'll work.
894
01:17:49,832 --> 01:17:51,125
I know what I'm doing.
895
01:17:51,209 --> 01:17:52,609
I can't believe
we're having this...
896
01:17:54,796 --> 01:17:56,464
I can't wait any longer.
897
01:17:58,800 --> 01:17:59,967
You can.
898
01:18:00,051 --> 01:18:01,552
There's always more time.
899
01:18:02,220 --> 01:18:03,320
No.
900
01:18:04,681 --> 01:18:05,973
Very soon,
901
01:18:07,475 --> 01:18:09,227
I'm going to look at your face
902
01:18:10,228 --> 01:18:12,480
and I'm not going to know
903
01:18:12,563 --> 01:18:14,774
who it is that's
staring back at me.
904
01:18:31,582 --> 01:18:33,751
Can't we just go home?
905
01:18:33,835 --> 01:18:35,002
Let's just go home.
906
01:18:35,086 --> 01:18:36,295
No.
907
01:18:36,379 --> 01:18:37,797
No.
908
01:18:39,549 --> 01:18:40,842
I'm not going home.
909
01:18:43,511 --> 01:18:45,722
And if you love me,
you'll let me do this.
910
01:18:48,015 --> 01:18:49,142
If you really love me.
911
01:18:53,354 --> 01:18:54,897
You'll break my heart.
912
01:18:58,151 --> 01:18:59,485
It'll last forever.
913
01:19:10,496 --> 01:19:12,540
You have to let me go.
914
01:19:12,623 --> 01:19:14,000
You have to let me go.
915
01:19:20,256 --> 01:19:22,425
- I can't.
- Well, yeah.
916
01:19:22,508 --> 01:19:25,595
I can't. Please.
917
01:20:53,432 --> 01:20:54,976
It's okay.
918
01:20:56,060 --> 01:20:57,478
I'm sorry.
919
01:20:59,897 --> 01:21:01,482
I'm sorry.
920
01:21:13,911 --> 01:21:15,246
Just hold me.
921
01:21:17,915 --> 01:21:19,375
Please.
922
01:25:42,680 --> 01:25:44,974
That sounds beautiful.
923
01:25:48,561 --> 01:25:50,521
Yeah, I think it's gonna be
all right.
924
01:25:53,691 --> 01:25:56,277
- Did I wake you?
- Mm-mm.
925
01:25:58,279 --> 01:25:59,572
What time is it?
926
01:26:45,159 --> 01:26:46,577
Let me be with you.
63507
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