All language subtitles for 3_Enyg65glish

Sorry.

-Shalom.
-Hi, how are you?

-Welcome.
-Thank you.

Please.

You think you can turn it
down a little bit?

Thank you. Thank you.

Here we go.

Oh, we're here.

-Yeah.
-Great.

Thank you very much
and keep the change.

-Oh wow, thank you.
-You're welcome.

-There you go.
-Thank you.

Enjoy.

Oh, hello.

I'm not sure I have the...
the right place.

This is apartment 6, isn't it?

Yeah...

Oh.

I'm Michael.

I'm...
I'm subletting the apartment.

Yeah.
Yes, no, but that's tomorrow.

You have the wrong day.

No, I don't, I don't think so.

Here.

Okay, so here it says the 8th.

Right.

And that's tomorrow,
tomorrow is the 8th.

No, tomorrow is the 9th.

Today is the 8th.

-Today is the 8th?
-Yeah.

Fuck.
I was sure today's the 7th.

Come. Come, please come in.

-Are you sure?
-Yeah, yeah.

I'm sorry about the mess.

I'm really sorry about the mess,

we were up all night shooting
something for my class

and I didn't sleep for two days
now

so I just forgot what day it is.

I was sure today is the 7th.

Just give me a few minutes
and I will organize everything,
okay?

I will make this place
look good as new.

Excuse me.

Yeah?

Yeah, actually, I...
I think it might be better

if I just book myself into a
hotel.

No! Please, please,
I'm almost finished.

-Five minutes.
-No, no, thank you, but...

I think I'd be better off
if I stayed at a hotel...

Listen, I promise, I...

Sorry, I have to answer, it's
my mom

and she won't stop calling me
if I don't answer, so...

Come. I will show you the house.

There are a lot of things.

Do you really wanna go to a
hotel?

Look around you,
this is like the coolest
neighborhood ever.

You know there was even a...

an article in TimeOut London

about the sexiest neighborhoods
in the world

and guess who won?

Please stay.

I'm sorry about my fuck-up,

but I promise you,
this is a great apartment.

And...

I don't know
how else to say it, but...

I really need the money.

Shit.

-Oh, hi.
-Hi.

Hang on just a second.

I'm just trying to...

Who are you murdering over
there?

Just trying to open a bottle of
wine.

With a knife?

Couldn't find a corkscrew.

There we go.

Tried you earlier,

I was getting worried.

Oh yeah, sorry, my...
my battery died.

Okay.

So how, how was your flight?

Did you get some sleep?

Not much.

Why didn't you take a pill?

I did. Two of them.

-Oh.
-I've gotta get Berger

to give me something stronger
when I get back.

I... thought he did.

I wish he had.

He said he'd think about raising
the dose when I get back.

Okay.

So how's Tel Aviv?

Ah, I haven't seen that much of
it.

It's kind of a strange mixture.

Not sure I can figure it out.

You always say that,
and you always do by the fifth
day.

I guess.

How's the apartment?

The apartment...

It's decent.

Decent?

It's okay, you know.

Well, why...
why don't you show me around?

Ah, let's see...

Here we go.

There's the bathroom,
you don't wanna go in there.

There's my desk.

Very low-hanging chandelier,

something like that.

And here is the living room,

you know, it's pretty standard.

Wait.
What's, what's that on the wall?

That is "Nightmare on Elm
Street."

Oh, part two!

"Freddy's Revenge."

Who hangs movie posters
in their living room?

He's a kid.

I think he's a film student
or something.

Ah, a room with a view.

Wouldn't go that far.

Just the other buildings,

here are the neighbors over
there.

It's too dark to see anything

but it's actually
a pretty cool location.

It was just chosen by
TimeOut London

as one of the sexiest new
neighborhoods
in the world, so...

Well, TimeOut London
makes mistakes too.

You're such a snob.

Here we are back in the kitchen.

Wait, wait...

Go back to the fridge.

Is that the kid?

Zoom in.

Yep, that's him.

Oh my god, he's hot!

Oh, stop.
You could be his dad.

But I'm not.

Is he gay?

I don't know.

Okay, I can see
you're not in the mood.

I'm sorry, I'm just exhausted.

Fine, I understand.

-Go to bed.
-Okay.

-Good night.
-Good night.

And don't forget
to take your pills.

I won't, I won't, don't worry.

-I love you.
-Love you too.

David Tartakover

is best known for his
politically
provocative posters.

His style features
minimalist compositions

that use images
taken from the media,

mixed with slogans and text,

inspired by Russian
Constructivism.

He has said:

"My work is often
considered a protest.

"It's not. It's a reaction.

"You have to go with
the truth all the way.

"Otherwise, what have you
accomplished?"

In one iconic poster,
a little boy with one eye shut,

possibly shot by a soldier,

is juxtaposed with
a child's drawing of a flower

and the words:

"Daddy, what are you doing
in the occupied territories?"

One of his most famous works

was the logo he designed
for the Peace Now Movement

in 1978.

The deceptively simple logo
combines
the words "Peace" and "Now"

and uses no other symbol or
design.

It became the first widely used
political sticker in Israel.

His work began to criticize
the political establishment

even more sharply
after the euphoric...

Hello?

Hi, is this David?

No.
This is his husband, Michael.

Hi, Michael,
it's Suzanne Shrib calling

from the IBS clinic.

Oh, hi, Suzanne.

Actually I have some terrific
news
for you and David.

What's that?

We've located a new surrogate
for you.

I'm sorry,
I'm not sure I understand.

Well, of course we'd like to
set up
an appointment for both of you
to meet her

and give you a chance
to form an impression,

see how you feel.

She's young, very bright,

she's getting an MSW at Rutgers.

Sorry, when was the last time
you spoke with David?

Oh, about a month ago.

I promised I'd give him a call
the moment we had a match.

Oh, hi.

Sorry, I didn't know if you're
awake.

I just wanted to take something
I left here.

Oh, no worries, come on inside.

I'll take it and leave,
it's in my room, one minute.

Sorry, man,
I just had to grab my weed.

Can't really fall asleep
without it.

Yeah, sure, totally get that.

So, you're good?

You're okay?
Need anything from me?

-You want some of this maybe?
-No, no, I'm good, thank you.

Hey, you hungry?

I just bought some breakfast,
you're welcome to join me.

-"Sweetbox"?
-Yeah, according to my research

it's the best bakery in town.

What?

It's funny that someone
has to come from New York

to tell me that the best bakery
in town
is just around the corner.

Are they good?

You're welcome to try one.

To tell you the truth,
I don't really eat anything
before lunch.

My breakfast is just black
coffee
and a cigarette.

Do you mind?
-Actually...

So,

what are you doing in Israel,
if it's okay to ask?

Of course, I'm a travel writer.

I write a column
for The New York Times.

-Really?
-Yeah, it's called "The
Intrepid Traveler."

"Intrepid"?

Intrepid, it means...

I don't know, resourceful?
Brave?

Someone who won't give up,

who's strong in the face of
adversity.

It's just a name though.

So you're not really intrepid?

I try to be.

The idea is to write about
the...

the city as it really is.

The local city,
not the... the touristy version.

It's your first time in Tel
Aviv?

It's actually my second.

I was here for my Bar-Mitzvah.

But that was in Jerusalem
about 100 years ago.

Probably wasn't such a great
visit

if it took you so long to come
back.

You are right about that.

It was kind of a difficult
visit.

My parents were...

They were constantly fighting.

In fact, a couple of months
after that
they were divorced.

-Oh...
-Yeah.

So what did they say when you
told them
that you're coming back here?

Who?

Oh, my parents, oh.

My mom passed away
couple of years ago.

I'm sorry, I have to remember

not to ask people over 50
this question,

I always do that.

It's okay.

My dad is still
very much alive and...

I think he'll be happy
when I tell him I came back.

Well, I hope this time
you'll have a better experience.

-Yeah. -I think Israelis
really try to be nice to
tourists.

Yeah, they wanna feed you,
they wanna tell you stories,

speak English with you

even if they don't know
how to speak English.

They just want you to like them.

Why do you think that is?

I don't know.

Maybe it's because
we are in the Middle East,

but we wanna be treated
like we are in the West.

Wow.

Can I quote you on that?

Are you making fun of me?

'Cause I was only trying to...

No, no, I wasn't.
I meant that.

That was interesting.

Okay.

So what's the plan?

-You have a plan, right?
-Oh, yes, yes.

Not only do I have a plan,

I have a list.

Everything that's highlighted
in yellow,

that's top priority, then...

Neve Tzedek.

Sarona, Manta Ray Beach,

Tel Aviv Museum.

Aren't all those the must-sees?

Yeah, yeah,

if you are a Jewish princess
on her Birthright tour, yeah.

These places are like
the most cliché thing ever.

Florentin?

Yeah, we're not gonna go
to Rothschild Boulevard,

you've been there enough.

What's wrong?

They stole my fucking bike.

Second time in six months.

Alright...

Alright, just calm down.

I'm not sure I follow,

you're saying you actually
know who stole your bike?

Not exactly,

but if I'm lucky they sold it
to the bike shop over there.

Last time those fuckers stole
my bike,
I found it there.

He's lying,
he said it's not my bike.

He wants me to pay 500 shekels
for my bike.

Why don't you just call the
police?
It's your bike.

Forget it, I don't want to do
that.

Why not?

The police in this area are
racists

and the immigrants,
the money they'll have to pay a
lawyer,

they'll have to steal
another 30 bikes.

That's decent of you.

I don't think
I could be that cool about it.

I mean, it is your bike, after
all.

I know, I'm gonna come back
later.

I know this guy's son,
I'll talk to him.

Want some juice?

Sure.

This is the best pomegranate
juice
you're gonna get in Tel Aviv.

Maybe in the world.

Do you have small change maybe?

Thanks.

Oh, you're right, this is good.

I told you.

Thirsty, huh?

Yeah.

You hungry?

A little.

'Cause there's a great
restaurant I know
with really great Israeli food.

Sounds good.

But we'll have to wait till
3:00.

Why?

'Cause they have a Happy Hour.

Yeah, all the food is half
price.

Well, it's two hours from now.

If you're hungry, we can go now.

I'm happy to pay.

No, no.
It's okay, I can wait.

It's our special hummus with
"ful,"
like fava beans.

Sounds good to me.

-So, two hummus with ful.
-Yeah.

One meat soup, one Israeli
salad,

and rice with beans.

-Okay.
-Sounds great.

How about some shots?
On the house?

No, no, I'm great, thank you.

Okay.

You never say no to free shots.

I'm fine with beer,

it's a little early in the day
for me
to start drinking arak.

Don't worry, I'll drink yours.

That's for you.

That's for you.

-L'chaim.
-L'chaim.

So...

Do you write only about travel
or also about other things?

What do you mean?

I googled you.

I saw you wrote a book once,

unless there's another writer
named Michael Green.

"Complications,"

it says it was a "thrilling
debut."

Yes, that was many,
many, many years ago.

What was it about?

It's about the world
I lived in back then.

New York City
in the late '80s, early '90s.

What, like AIDS and stuff like
that?

Well...

That's so depressing,

why does everything
always has to go back to that?

Well, I didn't go back, I was
there.

I sort of wrote the book in
real-time.

My first boyfriend, he...
he died of AIDS.

Fuck.

Enjoy.

Thank you.

Thanks.

Is that not what you ordered?

It is, but I said no onion.

I hate it.

How do you eat food without
onions,

that's what gives it all the
flavor.

Ichs.

What?

Ah, "ichs," it's like Hebrew
for "yuck."

Ah.

Icks.

Not "icks." Ichs.

Ichs.

So, um, what about you, Tomer?

What kind of movies
do you wanna make in the future?

Why in the future?
I'm already making them.

Oh, great.

So, what are they about?

What are they about?

It's hard to explain.

It's kind of "artistic horror,"
I guess,

but I don't wanna,
like, put it in a box, you
know? I...

I wanna make films that will
punch you
in the face, you know?

I'd rather make my audience
vomit
than just being fine with it.

Yeah, I think cinema should
physically shake you up,

like, like a rollercoaster.

Okay.

You have my number
if you need anything.

Yeah. You have everything
you need from the apartment?

Yeah.

Where are you staying?

Last night I went to my mother,

but I don't do it again,
it's too far.

Where will you be tonight?

Not sure.

You know what's the shittiest
thing?

Maybe I forgot to lock them.

I forget sometimes.

So, have fun, yeah?

Enjoy real Tel Aviv.

Wait.

What don't you just
stay here tonight?

Until you figure something out.

Thanks, but it's cool.

I'm used to subletting my place
and crashing at other people's.

-Are you sure?
-Yeah.

I mean,
you could stay on the sofa.

Maybe in return you could
continue to be my tour guide.

Keep showing me around the city
like you did today?

-Are you serious?
-Yeah.

What if I'm like, a serial
killer?

Or you, you could be a serial
killer.
I mean,

you never know.

It's that one.

So, I could just be here.

And you don't have to worry
about me.

Okay.

Very well done.

Okay.

Anything else?

Horror movies aren't really my
thing,
to be honest. I...

-I don't always understand
-You don't need to understand.

It's... it's what you feel.

It's a physical experience.

Oh, so, it's not meant to be
scary?

It's not meant to be anything,

it's what you bring to it,
it's...

it's what you see.

Oh, interesting.

"Interesting..."

What?

You're probably into what?

Romantic comedies, musicals?

Is that a crime?

No,

but it's very unoriginal to be
a gay man who loves musicals.

What, do you have like a poster
of Liza Minnelli in your living
room?

What's wrong with musicals?

Nothing, and that's the problem.

Everyone is so happy and so gay.

And what's wrong with that?

It's not a question of wrong,
it's a question of...

Not all of us like cheesy
romance
and happy endings.

Tomer!

Michael, Daria. Daria, Michael.

Hey, it's nice to meet you.

We just saw you in Tomer's film,

you were very good.

Don't believe him, he didn't
like it.

I did.

You're welcome to come in.

Daria and her boyfriend Amir
had a fight.

We didn't fight, we broke up.

Don't worry,
this happens every two weeks.

I think they do it just to have
a lot of make-up sex.

This time it's different, Tomer.

-What did he do this time?
-What did he do?

Well, right in the middle of
rehearsal
he stops everything

and says I'm ruining the dance.

Me?

He cursed me in fucking Arabic

and it wasn't about anything
that happened in the rehearsal,

it was all about something I
said
about his family a few days ago.

What did you say
about his family?

That maybe he shouldn't invite
them.

That maybe it's not for them,

maybe it's too provocative.

I didn't say it
in a racist way, you know?

In what?

-Racist way!
-Oh.

Fuck, I don't know
if I want my parents to come
either.

Daria and Amir have a dance show
that opens tomorrow.

Oh, great! I love dance.

Yeah.

Here, you're invited.

Oh, it's interesting.

Is this Arabic?

Yes, Amir is Arabic.

And also a pain in the ass.

So everything we do
has to have Arabic in it.

Even if it's not connected at
all.

Tomorrow is their premiere
and then they're moving to
Berlin together.

-Yeah...
-Wait, you're leaving Israel?

Yes.

But I thought you were breaking
up.

We are breaking up.

So why are you moving
to Berlin with him?

My best friend is dumping me.

I told you, you could come too,

but you didn't want to.

Of course I want to but I need
to finish university first, you
know.

Tomer can't move away

because his mother is stuck
in the kibbutz.

He will never leave her.

That's bullshit.

So, what do you plan
on doing in Berlin?

Basically the same thing, dance,

only with some more people
in the audience.

Maybe there I can afford more
than a kid's meal at McDonald's.

Wow.

Is that the big dream then?

What, a Big Mac?

Oh, no, I'm fine. Thank you.

I don't know...

I guess I've just given up
trying to make it happen here.

Why?

It's so hard to be
an artist here, you know?

You have to beg
the government for budgets

and then pray that anyone comes,

especially if your partner
is a Palestinian.

A couple of years ago,
we had a big new show.

A week before the premiere,

everything in Gaza got crazy.

Like, missile attacks, bombings,

you know, all that shit.

And at the end we performed
in front of three people.

Tomer was one of them.

Well, I hate to be the guy who
says,
"When I was your age," but...

"When I was your age..."

But, really,

we protested, we got arrested.

We did everything we could
to change the world.

Maybe it wasn't very much,

but some... some things did
change.

I don't know,

maybe this is my protest,

to leave this place
and think only of myself for
once.

To really live,

not only survive.

Isn't it odd that
you're moving to Germany?

A place that symbolizes
Jewish tragedy.

What's so funny?

Nothing, we're just high,
but you know that Berlin is like

the coolest place for many
years.

Tons of young Israelis move
there.

Come.

Michael!

Hey.

Look what I have.

-Wow.
-I cut class today

and on the way here I stopped
at this like second-hand
bookshop

and that's where I found it.

How cool is that?

Tomer.

Bye.

Is that your boyfriend?

I don't have a boyfriend.

We're just hanging out, that's
all.

He wanted more,
but I'm not into all that.

Why?

Just not.

People today are so desperate
for love and relationships,

so when they meet someone cool

they immediately want to define
and label and...

I mean, why would I wanna have
sex
with only one person, you know?

I don't wanna
tie myself down to anyone.

A man, a woman.

One partner, two partners,

even 100 partners, you know?
I just...

I want to enjoy everything
life has to offer.

Sure, but one of the things
this world has to offer is
the...

the love of another human being.

Some might even say
it's the best thing life has to
offer.

Do you still fuck?

Excuse me?

You and...

David, you still have sex?

-Well...
-You don't have to answer this
question

-if you don't want to.
-No, no.

I'm perfectly okay answering,
it's just that, well...

Yeah, we do occasionally have
sex.

Occasionally?

What does it mean?

What does that mean?
It means occasionally.

Obviously, as a relationship
evolves

some things happen less
frequently
than they once did.

And I'm not just talking about
sex.

Lots of things change.

So you have an open
relationship?

No...

Not as far as I know.

Wow.

I can't imagine no sex-life,
I mean, that would kill me.

Well, I didn't say there was
no...

Forget about sex, just...

kissing.

I mean, don't you miss it?
Like...

Like a really good kiss that
makes you forget about
everything,

you know?

You're a funny one.

Why?

Because for
Mr. I-don't-want-a-boyfriend-

no-happy-endings,

you sound pretty romantic
about the power of a kiss.

I'm gonna take a shower.

Hey! Hey!

It's okay, it's okay.
Shh...

Shh...

Hey!

He fell in the water.

I'm sorry,
I was just worried he might...

-Michal!
-I was just, I was only trying
to help,

I saw the baby going in the
water.

I was only trying to help,
I saw him fall and...

It's okay.

I'm really sorry.

-Come on.
-It's okay, forget about it.

Jesus.

Hey you.

Hi.

Everything okay?

Yeah, everything's fine.

Tried you earlier.

I know, I was busy.

Okay, listen,
I just, I talked to Suzanne,

I know she called you earlier,

she wasn't supposed to do that.

I'm really sorry, okay?

But let's just wait
till you get home

and we can talk
about this together,

just the two of us.

I mean, at the end of the day,
this is good news, right?

Yeah, I thought it was something
we were supposed to be doing
together.

Michael, come on,

you realize this is just the
first step
of a very long process.

-Don't you remember?
-I realize you want this more
than I do,

enough to, you know,
go get the ball rolling behind
my back.

No, actually, I...

Michael, no balls are rolling

and if you don't wanna talk to
her

I will call Suzanne
and I will let her know.

But from the information
that has been shared with me

this woman sounds pretty
amazing.

-Maybe even better than Ashley.
-I don't wanna meet her.

I don't wanna meet anyone.

Wait, what do you mean?

I want us to let it go.

-Let what go?
-You know what.

This, the baby.

All of it.

Maybe it was a mistake.

Michael, I'm very sorry
this happened,

but you don't get to just
unilaterally decide this,

-we got to talk about...
-Hold on.

Sorry to disturb, but we need
to go if we don't wanna be late.

Of course, just give me a
second.

Okay.

Who was that?

It was my... landlord.

He's invited me to a dance
thing.

A dance thing?

Yes, some of his friends
are performing at something,

I really should get going.

Fine.

-Enjoy the dance.
-Yeah, okay.

Come dance with us.

Ah, I think I'm gonna go home.

-What?
-Yeah, I've had a few too many
drinks

and you know, all the jetlag.

Have some MD.

-What?
-MDMA, it will wake you up.

I'm good, thank you.

Ever tried it?

Ah, yes, I've tried some
back in my twenties.

The 1920s?

Very funny.

Go, go, have a good time.

I'll see you back home.

Wow, home already?

What, the party is over?

You're wearing pajamas.

Yes, I am, and?

Who wears pajamas?

A lot of people.

Really? Where? In Downton Abbey?

Well, my dad wore pajamas,
my grandfather did as well,

which makes me a proud
third-generation pajama wearer.

Exactly, it's a grandfather
thing.

Why do you always gotta
make me feel like such an old
man?

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do
that,

I don't see you
as an old man, really.

What's that?

This guy on "Atraf."

"Atraf"?

The Israeli Grindr.

Oh, okay.

So this guy is texting me
all the time

and he wants me to treat him
like a chair.

And it's a pity,
'cause look, he's really hot.

I really don't get this.

What's not to get?

I don't know,
ordering in sex like it's a
pizza.

How is that any way
to meet somebody?

A quick way, no drama.

You see,
all these guys are very close.

What do you think about him?

He's good looking.

-Really?
-Yeah, I mean...

Come on, how do you
resist a body like that?

Should I ask him to come over?

What, for me?

For us.

I have...
I don't know, I don't think so.

Too late,
he's gonna be here in 7 minutes.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

I'm Michael.

Kobi.
Nice... nice to meet you.

Come on in, have a seat.

Nice pajamas.

Thanks, they've been
in my family for years.

Where are you from?

I'm, uh, from the US.
New York City.

Cool, cool.

I never been, I would love to
go.

Well, you should.

I will.

It's very expensive right now,
but...

I will.

Are you two a couple?

No, no, I'm here on business.

Okay, what do you do?

I'm a journalist. A writer.

He writes for The New York
Times,

so you better be good.

Good night.

Oh, fuck...

Fuck.

Michael.

Hey, what's going on?

Hi, Tomer.

I think it's best if I got a
hotel.

-What?
-I really need to work and...

Why? What happened?

Don't worry, you'll be paid in
full.

Why are you going?

-Are you Michael?
-Yes.

Michael, wait, please.
I got us muffins, come on.

Stay.

You have one more night,
why would you...

Also my mom wants you to come
to the kibbutz for dinner,
she...

She's cooking non-stop
since last night,

she'll kill me if you don't
come.

Stay.

It's okay, you can go.

See this place over there?

There was my first kiss.

Maya Noodleman.

We were 11.

Yeah... We went behind
one of the machines and kissed

until she started to cry,

'cause a bee stung her
in the eye.

They used to make honey here,

that's what made
the kibbutz so famous.

Oh, sweet,

never been to a honey factory.

Oh no, they stopped making
honey here many years ago.

They sold everything to some...

giant global corporation, you
know.

They still use
the kibbutz logo for sales.

To keep it authentic, you know.

That's a pity.

Yeah, maybe.

Nice to meet you, I'm Malka.

I'm Michael,
really nice to meet you.

I'm very sorry I didn't have
much time to prepare a lot.

Tomer only told me that you are
coming in the last minute.

-This is so wonderful.
-Thank you.

Especially this,
what's this called again?

It's my mom's top-secret
pumpkin tahini.

She won't reveal the recipe to
anyone.

I don't blame her,
it's really delicious, thank
you.

Tomer is also a good cook.

He knows how to make
a good Israeli breakfast.

Have you made him one?

Didn't have the time yet.

How long are you going to stay?

I leave tomorrow.

-Already?
-Yeah, just here for work.

The idea is to see
how much I can discover about a
city

in just five days.

And what did you discover
about Tel Aviv?

I don't know...

Maybe that it's full of
contradictions?

You know, it's chaotic and
tense,

but at the same time
it's completely laid back.

It's unlike any other place
I've visited.

But that maybe because
Tomer here was my guide.

I've enjoyed having him around,
seeing the city through his
eyes.

I'm sure the feeling is mutual.

He never brings anyone back
to the kibbutz.

I'm embarrassing you?

I used to be the cool mom,
once upon a time.

I was in all his movies,

but now if only he could,
he would, poof,

make me disappear.

I wouldn't make you disappear,

but I might hit
the mute button sometimes.

Do you have children, Michael?

No, no, I don't.

And you've never wanted any?

Tomer mentioned that
you have a partner for many
years.

Yes, well,
when we were the right age,

it was much less common
for gay men to have children,

and now that it's actually
a viable option...

I guess we're just too old.

What are you talking about?

Here in the kibbutz
there is a couple, two women,

not young at all,

that just had beautiful twins.

Everything is possible now.

You know, if only I could,

I would have a few more like
him.

That's the only one thing I...

-Regret.
-Regret, yeah.

Not having more children.

You know, I had him on my own,

well, with a little help
from the sperm bank,

also not the most traditional
thing,

especially here in the kibbutz.

Everybody said, "This is not
right,

"a child should grow up
with a father,"

but I think it's bullshit.

Father, mother...

The only thing a child needs
to grow up is love.

Well, you did a great job
with this one,

congratulations.

L'chaim!

But listen, Michael,

it's never too late
to have a child.

Any time is the right time.

I'm sure your parents
wanted grandchildren,

all parents want grandchildren.

My father certainly didn't,
at least not from me.

I mean, when I told him we were
even thinking about surrogacy,

he said we were crazy.

That the world had gone mad

for allowing two men
to even think about having
children.

He will change his mind

once you'll bring him
a grandchild, believe me.

I'm not so sure about that.

Why not?

Well, the truth is,

we did try, my husband and I.

Quite recently, in fact.

We...

we found a wonderful surrogate,

she got pregnant
almost immediately.

And everything went
really, really well.

We were so happy waiting,
you remember what that's like.

All the preparations, we...

we turned the guest room
into a nursery and...

And then six months ago,

we made it
to the delivery room and...

And things went...

Well, not so good.

We lost our baby.

Oh.

My father, he...

He came to the hospital
and he didn't say a thing to me.

Didn't hug me or anything,

he just stood there with
this look on his face, like:

"See? See, I told you so."

Oh my god,

I'm so sorry, I...

didn't mean to spoil the dinner.

It's not as if
I actually knew her,

she was, you know,
she was just a newborn.

We never even really had
a chance to bond with her,

just the idea of her.

In any case,

we've put it behind us now.

What name did you give her?

We named her Sarah,

after my mother.

I'm really so sorry, I...

certainly hadn't planned on...

I'm sorry.

No, no.

It's I who am sorry.

Very, very sorry.

Home sweet home.

So, did you finish packing?

What the fuck?

I can't in good conscience
leave you with a closet

that looks like it's been
ransacked by baboons.

But that's how I like it.

No, that's how you think
you like it.

Why not just give my way a try?

You may surprise yourself
and find out you prefer it.

And if you don't, no need to
worry,

I guarantee you
the baboons will return.

How am I supposed to find
anything?

It's very easy, I'm gonna show
you.

Your nice shirts,

all two of them, are right here.

Your t-shirts all folded
and arranged by color

are up there.

Your jeans, sweaters,

sweatshirts, sweatpants

are there.

Your shoes are down on the
floor,

your sneakers, your flip-flops.

Your underwear is in this drawer

and your socks are here.

But we have a bit of a problem
with your socks.

Come here,
give me a hand with this,

we have some serious
matchmaking to do.

And please, no projecting
your crippling fear of
relationships

onto these poor, defenseless
socks.

Socks, in case you didn't know,

are monogamous.

They're like swans.

Wait...

What are you doing, what...

You're murdering them,
don't roll them into a ball
like that,

it makes them lose their
elasticity.

Here, you...

You just wanna put them
right on top of each other,

look, I'll show you with this.

You just lay

one right on top of the other

and then you ever so gently

just bring them together.

Like a perfect square.

You're crazy.

Excuse me, sir,

have you seen my partner?

Looks just like me,

blue with white stars.

Um, no, I haven't seen him.

Well,

looks like we're the only
single socks left.

I lost my mate too.

Hey, I got an idea.

Why don't we pair up?

No way!

You want me,

a blue sock with white stars,

to pair up with you,
a simple yellow sock?

It will never work.

Well, excuse me, geesh.

Here I thought a young, hip,

blue sock with white stars
would be open to experimenting.

Why are you such a slave
to social conventions?

-Wait.
-What?

This song,

you have to hear this song,
wait.

May I ask Monsieur
to move to the balcony?

The best breakfast in Tel Aviv
is now being served.

Ichs.

What?

I thought you hated onion.

Of course I do, but you love it.

Oh, would you care for
some bread I just baked,

I mean, bought?

This looks just like the challah
my grandfather used to throw at
us

every Friday before Shabbat.

Why did he do that?

Who knows,

but basically instead
of slicing the bread

he'd just tear pieces off of it

and throw it at anyone
who wanted some.

I always thought of it like some
old-fashioned religious custom,
you know.

The breaking of the bread.

We didn't do those things
in the kibbutz.

I have to ask my father
what it meant when I call him,

tell him I was back in Israel.

Alright, alright...

No, no...

What?

Look at this picture.

-What's happening?
-It's a pigeon, but look,

look what's going on
behind the pigeon...

Are those two people having sex?

-Yes.
-Wow.

Look at that, is it real?

You'll tell me
when it's online, right?

I mean, the article.

-I will.
-'Cause I really wanna read it.

Okay.

And you know what?

What?

I think you should write
another book.

Call it:

"The Nightmare Bar-Mitzvah,"

and then I'll buy the rights
and make a great movie,

which, of course,
will be better than your book.

Which will be good too, but you
know,
just not as good as the movie.

And then I'll win an Oscar.

Yeah... And I'll probably share
it
with you, you know, 'cause...

I'm nice.

Well, I would like that very
much.

Oscars or no Oscars.

I think you should try again.

Huh?

I think you should try again,
I agree with my mom.

I don't think
it's too late for you.

Wow,

I thought you didn't believe
in happy endings.

It has nothing to do
with happy endings,

I just think
you'll be a good father,

that's all.

Well, Tomer,

I really should get going.

But thank you for everything.

You'll be in touch, right?

About the article and...

Of course, of course I will.

Oh...

Hey,

it's okay.

It's okay, Tomer.

Everything is gonna be okay.

Oh my god,

I can't believe I'm crying
at the airport, it's so fucking
gay.

Go, go, just...

Just go, I'm okay.
I'm okay.

Hey, it's me.

I'm on the plane,

it's a little too early
to call, so...

If all goes well I'll be home
around five this afternoon.

I was thinking maybe we could go
to Stone Park for dinner,

we haven't done that
in a long time.

Anyhow, I will see you soon.