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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,139 --> 00:00:02,640 sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~ 2 00:00:02,842 --> 00:00:05,242 Heya, Phil. I'm ready for another beerski. 3 00:00:05,244 --> 00:00:07,956 Okay, but you're getting a bit drunkski. 4 00:00:08,008 --> 00:00:09,581 That's the planski. 5 00:00:09,684 --> 00:00:12,920 I'm celebrating the glorious victory of my favourite team. 6 00:00:12,922 --> 00:00:14,889 Elk Valley Vultures! Whoo! 7 00:00:14,891 --> 00:00:17,324 And what's that, hockey? Soccer? 8 00:00:17,326 --> 00:00:20,661 - Bocce ball. - You watch pro bocce ball? 9 00:00:20,663 --> 00:00:22,563 Oh, no, not pro. High school. 10 00:00:22,565 --> 00:00:24,598 Elk Valley Vultures are the Provincial 11 00:00:24,599 --> 00:00:27,535 bocce ball champions! Whoo! 12 00:00:27,537 --> 00:00:29,537 Hey, Brent, keep an eye on Hank. 13 00:00:29,539 --> 00:00:31,448 - He's getting a bit goofy. - Getting? 14 00:00:31,473 --> 00:00:33,440 That horse left the barn 30 years ago. 15 00:00:33,442 --> 00:00:35,709 Hey, Ike, scootch over. You're on my stool. 16 00:00:35,711 --> 00:00:38,546 - How is this your stool? - I was sitting there. 17 00:00:38,548 --> 00:00:40,848 - I just went to the bathroom. - You snooze, you lose. 18 00:00:40,850 --> 00:00:42,917 I wasn't snoozing, I was peeing. 19 00:00:42,919 --> 00:00:47,221 - A 20-minute pee? - It wasn't 20, it was maybe 10. 20 00:00:47,223 --> 00:00:49,490 There's a new trivia thing above the urinal, and... 21 00:00:49,492 --> 00:00:51,793 Look, it doesn't matter. I always sit here. 22 00:00:51,794 --> 00:00:53,894 Phil, tell Ike that's my stool. 23 00:00:53,896 --> 00:00:55,996 Sorry, Brent. Them's the breaks. 24 00:00:55,998 --> 00:00:59,200 Uh, no, them's are not the breaks. 25 00:00:59,202 --> 00:01:03,003 Them's are not even the basic rules of a civilized society. 26 00:01:03,005 --> 00:01:06,307 Come on, pal. Have a drink and lighten up. 27 00:01:06,309 --> 00:01:09,009 Kind of weird to have a favourite stool anyway. 28 00:01:09,011 --> 00:01:12,079 But not weird to have a favourite high school bocce ball team. 29 00:01:12,081 --> 00:01:15,983 ♪ You think there's not a lot goin' on ♪ 30 00:01:15,985 --> 00:01:19,353 ♪ Look closer, baby you're so wrong ♪ 31 00:01:23,358 --> 00:01:25,726 Ridiculous. How can someone lose their seat 32 00:01:25,728 --> 00:01:27,161 because they went to the can? 33 00:01:27,163 --> 00:01:28,996 Nature dictates we have to use the bathroom. 34 00:01:28,998 --> 00:01:30,197 It's an immutable law, 35 00:01:30,199 --> 00:01:32,066 so you can't just steal someone's stool 36 00:01:32,068 --> 00:01:33,268 because they're in the toilet. 37 00:01:33,292 --> 00:01:36,003 It's a foundational pillar of every organized religion. 38 00:01:36,005 --> 00:01:38,272 I don't recall the word "toilet" in the Old Testament. 39 00:01:38,274 --> 00:01:40,608 Well, they had different words back then. 40 00:01:40,610 --> 00:01:42,977 - It was a cubit or something. - Ah, give it a rest. 41 00:01:42,979 --> 00:01:45,212 You've been complaining about that all day. 42 00:01:45,214 --> 00:01:47,848 Normally I wouldn't care, but you're complaining around me. 43 00:01:47,850 --> 00:01:49,583 Like, where I can hear it. 44 00:01:50,518 --> 00:01:54,154 Oh, well, lookee who's strolling in here pleasant as pie 45 00:01:54,156 --> 00:01:56,423 without a hint of betrayer's remorse. 46 00:01:56,425 --> 00:01:59,760 Just stopped in to pick up a pack of Cucumbawumbas. 47 00:01:59,762 --> 00:02:02,997 - Sorry, saving those for someone. - What? For who? 48 00:02:02,999 --> 00:02:05,966 Yeah, who else eats cucumber-flavoured candy? 49 00:02:05,968 --> 00:02:06,900 They're the best! 50 00:02:06,902 --> 00:02:08,936 Cucumbawumba are numba wumba! 51 00:02:08,938 --> 00:02:12,640 They're gross. I chew one down, but it comes up again. 52 00:02:12,642 --> 00:02:13,874 I know you love them, Phil, 53 00:02:13,876 --> 00:02:16,043 but I'm saving these for another customer, 54 00:02:16,045 --> 00:02:18,379 whose patronage I actually value. 55 00:02:18,381 --> 00:02:21,282 I see. This is about last night. 56 00:02:21,284 --> 00:02:23,150 I have no idea to what you are referring. 57 00:02:23,152 --> 00:02:25,052 Uh-oh, you know he's mad 58 00:02:25,054 --> 00:02:26,520 when he gets grammatically correct. 59 00:02:26,522 --> 00:02:28,755 Them's the breaks. 60 00:02:29,424 --> 00:02:30,524 You enjoying that? 61 00:02:31,661 --> 00:02:32,793 Wha-ha! Gaah! 62 00:02:32,795 --> 00:02:35,663 Tastes like cucumber- flavoured ear wax. 63 00:02:35,665 --> 00:02:37,931 That you found in a dirty cubit? 64 00:02:40,856 --> 00:02:43,824 Okay, I'm off. I left you a crib sheet 65 00:02:43,826 --> 00:02:45,026 to help you with the paperwork. 66 00:02:45,050 --> 00:02:48,095 I don't need a crib sheet. I have an excellent memory. 67 00:02:48,097 --> 00:02:52,366 Okay, well, don't forget there's a crib sheet right there. 68 00:02:52,368 --> 00:02:54,401 My mind is like a steel trap. 69 00:02:54,403 --> 00:02:57,070 - A steel colander, maybe. - Oh, yeah? 70 00:02:57,072 --> 00:03:00,475 Do you know what was the top-selling country album of 1991? 71 00:03:00,476 --> 00:03:03,177 - I do not. - Garth Brooks's "No Fences." 72 00:03:03,179 --> 00:03:06,146 Do you know what year Merle Haggard put out his 30th album? 73 00:03:06,148 --> 00:03:09,683 - It'd be weird if I did. - 1974. 74 00:03:09,685 --> 00:03:11,151 See? Steel trap. 75 00:03:11,153 --> 00:03:13,487 Yes, you know a lot about country music trivia. 76 00:03:13,489 --> 00:03:17,958 That'd be helpful if we were DJs on 98.6 "The Haystack," 77 00:03:17,960 --> 00:03:21,628 but we're cops, and sometimes you forget cop stuff. 78 00:03:21,630 --> 00:03:22,630 No, I don't. 79 00:03:22,697 --> 00:03:27,968 What form gets filled out for the equipment budget? 27-B or 27-C? 80 00:03:27,970 --> 00:03:30,804 - Uh... 27-B. - W-51. 81 00:03:30,806 --> 00:03:35,576 - Crib sheet's on your desk. - Trick question. 82 00:03:39,848 --> 00:03:42,249 - Aah! - Mm. Morning. 83 00:03:42,251 --> 00:03:45,185 Okay, "A," it's almost 7:00 p.m., 84 00:03:45,187 --> 00:03:47,154 and "B," why are you in my house? 85 00:03:47,156 --> 00:03:49,723 No, actually, "A" is why are you in my house? 86 00:03:49,725 --> 00:03:52,960 Uh, you told me if I was too drunk to drive last night, 87 00:03:52,962 --> 00:03:54,127 I could crash at your place. 88 00:03:54,129 --> 00:03:56,763 We never had any such conversation. 89 00:03:56,765 --> 00:03:58,632 We didn't? Huh, maybe I dreamed it. 90 00:03:58,634 --> 00:04:01,168 You were holding a panda bear at the time. 91 00:04:01,170 --> 00:04:02,503 So you slept here last night? 92 00:04:02,505 --> 00:04:05,272 How did I not see you on the sofa when I left this morning? 93 00:04:05,274 --> 00:04:08,275 I was probably still asleep outside in your hedge. 94 00:04:08,277 --> 00:04:10,694 Oh, yeah, yeah, I crawled in through a window 95 00:04:10,695 --> 00:04:11,979 when the sun got hot. 96 00:04:11,981 --> 00:04:15,415 Well, that's a disturbing violation, and it's time to go. 97 00:04:15,417 --> 00:04:18,352 Oh, uh, can you give me a ride to my truck? 98 00:04:18,354 --> 00:04:19,786 I left it at the bar. 99 00:04:19,788 --> 00:04:23,891 Ugh. Fine, whatever speeds up the "you leaving" part of this. 100 00:04:25,127 --> 00:04:28,529 How come I always have to do the stupid cash-out? 101 00:04:28,531 --> 00:04:31,098 Just these stupid chips, I guess. 102 00:04:31,100 --> 00:04:33,233 I know why I'm pissed off. Why are you pissed off? 103 00:04:33,235 --> 00:04:36,670 I have to stupid work late and do a bunch of stupid forms, 104 00:04:36,672 --> 00:04:39,339 and I can't remember what any of the stupid forms are for 105 00:04:39,341 --> 00:04:41,275 because I have a stupid memory. 106 00:04:41,277 --> 00:04:44,244 Memories aren't stupid. People are stupid. 107 00:04:44,246 --> 00:04:45,979 Present company... 108 00:04:45,981 --> 00:04:48,148 Whatever. Anyone can have a good memory. 109 00:04:48,150 --> 00:04:51,385 - You just need to train it. - Really? Can you teach me? 110 00:04:51,387 --> 00:04:53,153 If it gets me out of here, yes. 111 00:04:53,155 --> 00:04:55,989 Davis needs my help! You have to cash out! 112 00:04:57,058 --> 00:04:59,092 I was in the back. What did you... 113 00:04:59,094 --> 00:05:01,962 Wanda? You left the cash out! 114 00:05:03,276 --> 00:05:05,832 - Corner Gas. - Brent? Phil. 115 00:05:05,834 --> 00:05:08,502 I got something at the bar I think you'll like. 116 00:05:08,504 --> 00:05:11,605 Come over, and bring the Cucumbawumbas. 117 00:05:11,607 --> 00:05:15,442 This is a special exclusive area. 118 00:05:15,444 --> 00:05:18,345 Nobody can go in here except you. 119 00:05:18,347 --> 00:05:21,014 Whoa, really? That's pretty cool. 120 00:05:21,016 --> 00:05:23,917 - Uh-uh... - Oh, yeah, right. 121 00:05:32,327 --> 00:05:35,095 Hurry up, woman! We're going to miss Happy Hour. 122 00:05:35,097 --> 00:05:37,264 Doesn't matter what time we get there, 123 00:05:37,266 --> 00:05:39,566 Happy Hour ends when you show up. 124 00:05:39,568 --> 00:05:41,068 What the hell does that mean? 125 00:05:41,070 --> 00:05:43,136 I just mean that whenever we go out, 126 00:05:43,138 --> 00:05:46,239 to the bar, to the Ruby, even for groceries, 127 00:05:46,241 --> 00:05:49,142 - you always cause a kerfuffle. - I do not. 128 00:05:49,144 --> 00:05:51,278 You do. You're a kerfuffler. 129 00:05:51,280 --> 00:05:54,281 I can't help it! Some people need a good fuffling. 130 00:05:54,283 --> 00:05:55,616 Everything okay here? 131 00:05:55,618 --> 00:05:59,386 If it wasn't, what would you do about it, short pants? 132 00:05:59,388 --> 00:06:02,289 - I'm wearing regular pants. - But you're short. 133 00:06:02,291 --> 00:06:04,858 I'm still an officer of the law. 134 00:06:04,860 --> 00:06:07,163 Not out of uniform. 135 00:06:07,262 --> 00:06:10,297 Who are you gonna scare in a purple T-shirt? 136 00:06:10,299 --> 00:06:12,933 See? Not even at the bar yet, 137 00:06:12,935 --> 00:06:14,829 and you're already kerfuffling. 138 00:06:16,204 --> 00:06:17,704 Oh, this is cool. 139 00:06:17,706 --> 00:06:20,007 I've never been in a cop car before. 140 00:06:20,009 --> 00:06:22,477 - Well, not the front seat. - Quit fiddling. 141 00:06:22,478 --> 00:06:24,978 You said you'd help me with my memory problem. 142 00:06:24,980 --> 00:06:27,147 - I already did. - You did? 143 00:06:27,149 --> 00:06:30,350 No, just a little memory humour. 144 00:06:30,352 --> 00:06:33,820 Okay, here's the thing, it's easy to remember something 145 00:06:33,822 --> 00:06:35,656 if you're actually interested in it, right? 146 00:06:35,658 --> 00:06:40,694 - Yeah, but cop paperwork is dull. - I'm sure it is. 147 00:06:40,696 --> 00:06:43,869 The trick is to associate it with something you actually like. 148 00:06:43,893 --> 00:06:45,699 So, what's something you're really into? 149 00:06:45,701 --> 00:06:47,601 I know a lot about country music. 150 00:06:47,603 --> 00:06:50,404 Okay, give me the name of a country song and who sings it. 151 00:06:50,406 --> 00:06:54,408 Uh... "Highway Heartache" by Elden Bucksaw. 152 00:06:54,410 --> 00:06:57,711 Elden Bucksaw? Yeesh, never stood a chance. 153 00:06:57,713 --> 00:06:59,479 Okay, now what's something 154 00:06:59,481 --> 00:07:01,348 you have a hard time remembering at work? 155 00:07:01,350 --> 00:07:04,184 Hmm... I always forget to send in the mileage report 156 00:07:04,186 --> 00:07:06,586 - at the end of the month. - Well, that's an easy one. 157 00:07:06,588 --> 00:07:10,524 Associate the word "Highway" from "Highway Heartache" with mileage. 158 00:07:10,526 --> 00:07:14,194 - Highway, mileage... get it? - Uh-huh. 159 00:07:14,196 --> 00:07:16,396 ...and the name Elden is like "all done." 160 00:07:16,398 --> 00:07:19,199 As in, "you're all done with the mileage for the month." 161 00:07:19,201 --> 00:07:22,936 Hey, I could do that. That's great! 162 00:07:22,938 --> 00:07:23,837 Give me another one. 163 00:07:23,839 --> 00:07:27,474 Okay, but first, you got keys for these, right? 164 00:07:27,476 --> 00:07:29,743 Stop fiddling with stuff. 165 00:07:31,112 --> 00:07:34,648 Okay, thanks again for letting me crash at your place. 166 00:07:34,650 --> 00:07:37,217 I didn't let you, but you're welcome. 167 00:07:37,219 --> 00:07:38,585 And thanks for helping me 168 00:07:38,587 --> 00:07:41,188 solve my "how to get back to my truck" problem. 169 00:07:41,190 --> 00:07:43,090 My house is six blocks from the bar, 170 00:07:43,092 --> 00:07:45,058 so it wasn't much of a problem. 171 00:07:45,060 --> 00:07:47,961 - Anyway, I'm gonna scoot. - Oh, hang on. 172 00:07:47,963 --> 00:07:51,098 New problem. I don't have my keys. 173 00:07:52,133 --> 00:07:54,901 Where's the last place you remember having them? 174 00:07:54,903 --> 00:07:57,237 If I knew that, we wouldn't be in this mess. 175 00:07:57,239 --> 00:07:58,705 I'm not in this mess. 176 00:07:58,707 --> 00:08:01,575 It wasn't my idea for you to get drunk last night, 177 00:08:01,577 --> 00:08:03,310 or leave your truck here. 178 00:08:03,312 --> 00:08:05,345 Although once you had the "get drunk" idea, 179 00:08:05,347 --> 00:08:07,247 the "leaving your truck" was a good idea. 180 00:08:07,249 --> 00:08:08,882 They're not inside the headlight. 181 00:08:08,884 --> 00:08:11,518 Why would your keys be inside the headlight? 182 00:08:11,520 --> 00:08:12,520 I don't know. 183 00:08:12,521 --> 00:08:14,721 You said "idea," I thought "lightbulb." 184 00:08:14,723 --> 00:08:17,591 Wow. Well, I'll leave you to it. 185 00:08:17,593 --> 00:08:21,895 And if I can't find my keys, I'll just crash at your place again! 186 00:08:23,766 --> 00:08:28,335 - We're finding your keys. - Thanks. I appreciate your help. 187 00:08:28,337 --> 00:08:31,271 Well, it's easier than installing bars on my windows. 188 00:08:36,734 --> 00:08:40,002 What's this? Some kind of art thing? 189 00:08:40,004 --> 00:08:41,103 You being punished? 190 00:08:41,105 --> 00:08:43,272 - What'd you do? - It just so happens 191 00:08:43,274 --> 00:08:47,142 I have my very own private exclusive bar area. 192 00:08:47,144 --> 00:08:49,077 Cool. Can we come in? 193 00:08:49,079 --> 00:08:52,748 If you correctly answer this skill-testing question. 194 00:08:53,850 --> 00:08:58,253 - What does the word "exclusive" mean? - Oh. 195 00:08:58,255 --> 00:09:00,222 You mind if we just stand here and watch you? 196 00:09:00,224 --> 00:09:02,157 I do kind of, yeah. 197 00:09:02,159 --> 00:09:05,994 - What can I get you? - I'll have a whisky and ginger. 198 00:09:05,996 --> 00:09:09,698 I'll have a beer, unless Officer Blondie over there 199 00:09:09,700 --> 00:09:12,735 - wants to check my I.D.? - No, I'm pretty sure 200 00:09:12,736 --> 00:09:14,770 you're over the legal drinking age, 201 00:09:14,772 --> 00:09:16,839 by a half century or so. 202 00:09:18,441 --> 00:09:20,943 You okay? You look like your shorts are too tight. 203 00:09:20,945 --> 00:09:24,446 Not to be indelicate, but it's Trivia Night at Club Urinal. 204 00:09:24,448 --> 00:09:26,348 - What? - I have to pee, 205 00:09:26,350 --> 00:09:27,983 but I'm afraid if I go to the bathroom, 206 00:09:27,985 --> 00:09:30,352 somebody will jump in here and usurp my seat. 207 00:09:30,354 --> 00:09:32,154 I could stand guard if you like. 208 00:09:32,156 --> 00:09:35,757 - Hmm, out of uniform? - What is with you people? 209 00:09:35,759 --> 00:09:37,492 I am more than a uniform, 210 00:09:37,494 --> 00:09:39,761 I am a highly trained peace officer, 211 00:09:39,763 --> 00:09:41,930 regardless of what I'm wearing. 212 00:09:41,932 --> 00:09:45,801 - Hey, what's in here? Ow! - That's off limits. 213 00:09:45,803 --> 00:09:47,736 Wow. Point taken. 214 00:09:47,738 --> 00:09:50,006 You're on guard. I'll be right back. 215 00:09:50,773 --> 00:09:51,874 I just want to go in there. 216 00:09:51,876 --> 00:09:53,609 Yeah, well, you're not allowed. 217 00:09:53,611 --> 00:09:56,111 - Why not? - I don't actually know why not, 218 00:09:56,113 --> 00:09:58,180 but I know this... take a hike. 219 00:09:58,182 --> 00:09:59,147 The rest of you, 220 00:09:59,149 --> 00:10:01,149 you're blocking the main thoroughfare here. 221 00:10:01,151 --> 00:10:04,820 Everybody stand to one side. Now! 222 00:10:05,723 --> 00:10:08,156 Purple T-shirt, my ass. 223 00:10:08,358 --> 00:10:11,860 Would it be easier for me to make memory associations 224 00:10:11,862 --> 00:10:14,162 with country music titles or lyrics? 225 00:10:14,164 --> 00:10:16,498 How should I know? I hate country music. 226 00:10:16,500 --> 00:10:19,201 What? How can you hate country music? 227 00:10:19,203 --> 00:10:20,135 Pretty simple, really. 228 00:10:20,137 --> 00:10:23,171 Listen to a song or two, and boom... hate it. 229 00:10:23,173 --> 00:10:24,539 What do you hate about it? 230 00:10:24,541 --> 00:10:27,509 The deeply stirring grassroots poetry 231 00:10:27,511 --> 00:10:30,612 that holds a rearview mirror up to our souls? 232 00:10:30,614 --> 00:10:33,215 The forlorn fondling of the human heart? 233 00:10:33,217 --> 00:10:35,117 The rich nasal twang that tickles the... 234 00:10:35,119 --> 00:10:38,253 - Aah! - Whoa! Cool! 235 00:10:38,255 --> 00:10:39,922 Which button was that? 236 00:10:39,924 --> 00:10:42,457 - You have to stop playing with... - Aah! 237 00:10:42,459 --> 00:10:45,861 Oh, the one marked "siren." Well, that makes sense. 238 00:10:46,790 --> 00:10:50,692 Wow, Karen. You kept everyone out. I'm impressed. 239 00:10:50,694 --> 00:10:52,662 - Hey, Brent. - What the hell? 240 00:10:52,663 --> 00:10:54,029 Do you know where Hank's keys are? 241 00:10:54,031 --> 00:10:57,933 - I rescind my praise. - I assumed you'd want Lacey in. 242 00:10:57,935 --> 00:11:00,068 I'd appreciate it if you asked me first. 243 00:11:00,070 --> 00:11:03,806 Brent, can Lacey access your special area? 244 00:11:03,808 --> 00:11:07,810 I'd also appreciate it if you worded that differently, but yes. 245 00:11:07,812 --> 00:11:09,745 Don't worry, I know how this works 246 00:11:09,747 --> 00:11:11,446 from my club days in the city. 247 00:11:11,448 --> 00:11:14,316 Hey, Phil, a couple of drinks for the VIP section? 248 00:11:14,318 --> 00:11:16,852 - My tab. - Ooh, VIP. 249 00:11:16,854 --> 00:11:19,087 I hadn't heard it put in those words before. 250 00:11:19,089 --> 00:11:21,557 They're more like letters. 251 00:11:21,559 --> 00:11:22,791 ♪ Been ten years ♪ 252 00:11:22,793 --> 00:11:26,862 ♪ But I know what I know sure as hell ♪ 253 00:11:26,864 --> 00:11:28,964 ♪ That ol' dog was sweeter ♪ 254 00:11:28,966 --> 00:11:33,532 ♪ Than puddin' in a pie shell... ♪ 255 00:11:36,674 --> 00:11:38,841 Okay, clearly this horrendous song 256 00:11:38,843 --> 00:11:41,844 - strikes a weird chord with you. - Horrendous? 257 00:11:41,846 --> 00:11:44,513 The song's name is "My Pal, Puddin'" 258 00:11:44,515 --> 00:11:47,883 - The dog is Puddin'. - The dog's worm food. 259 00:11:47,885 --> 00:11:49,451 He said it's been 10 years. 260 00:11:49,453 --> 00:11:52,020 Anyway, what's something in your paperwork 261 00:11:52,022 --> 00:11:53,121 you could connect to it? 262 00:11:54,992 --> 00:11:57,960 I don't know. This is really hard. 263 00:11:57,962 --> 00:12:01,029 Can't I just let the music flow through me 264 00:12:01,031 --> 00:12:05,000 - and fuel my delicate soul? - No! We're here to work. 265 00:12:06,237 --> 00:12:08,837 How am I supposed to concentrate when you're wearing that? 266 00:12:08,839 --> 00:12:11,306 Would it help if I put the visor up? 267 00:12:13,944 --> 00:12:17,012 It would help if you stopped breathing like that. 268 00:12:17,014 --> 00:12:21,416 "Luke... who's your Daddy?" 269 00:12:22,119 --> 00:12:24,620 - What are you looking for? - Hank's keys! 270 00:12:24,622 --> 00:12:27,022 - I told you that. - Ah, sorry, I was distracted 271 00:12:27,024 --> 00:12:29,358 by how long that line is getting. 272 00:12:29,360 --> 00:12:31,793 You're gonna have to start letting people in. 273 00:12:31,795 --> 00:12:33,883 Am I the only one that knows what the word 274 00:12:33,884 --> 00:12:35,631 - "exclusive" means? - That's how this works. 275 00:12:35,798 --> 00:12:39,134 You let just enough people in to get the crowd's hopes up, 276 00:12:39,136 --> 00:12:41,770 but you leave the majority outside looking in 277 00:12:41,772 --> 00:12:44,039 to create hype, but no riff-raff. 278 00:12:44,041 --> 00:12:47,409 Well, I don't know who's riff and who's raff. 279 00:12:47,411 --> 00:12:50,946 Karen, you can let one more person into the VIP section, 280 00:12:50,948 --> 00:12:52,648 but be selective. 281 00:12:54,150 --> 00:12:56,184 You double-fisting tonight, Mavis? 282 00:12:56,186 --> 00:13:00,055 One of these is for Brent... if I get inside. 283 00:13:00,057 --> 00:13:03,191 Well played. 284 00:13:03,193 --> 00:13:05,494 Those barbecue? 285 00:13:07,263 --> 00:13:10,766 Mm, the rye in the VIP section tastes way better. 286 00:13:10,768 --> 00:13:12,567 It's the exact same rye. 287 00:13:12,569 --> 00:13:16,238 I know, but this is spiked with justice. Right, Lanny? 288 00:13:16,240 --> 00:13:17,773 Lanny? Really? 289 00:13:17,775 --> 00:13:19,842 Hey, Karen, I'm a little stumped 290 00:13:19,843 --> 00:13:20,943 by your vetting process. 291 00:13:20,945 --> 00:13:23,245 Don't tell me how to do my job. 292 00:13:24,148 --> 00:13:27,282 Okay, let's see if your memory's improving. 293 00:13:27,284 --> 00:13:29,084 What's this song about? 294 00:13:29,086 --> 00:13:31,420 Driving Highway 431 through Tennessee. 295 00:13:31,422 --> 00:13:33,889 Right, and what should this remind you to do? 296 00:13:33,891 --> 00:13:37,359 Well, 431 is a date, 297 00:13:37,361 --> 00:13:42,965 and "Tennessee" sounds like "10-AC," so... 298 00:13:42,967 --> 00:13:46,835 I need to submit form 10-AC by April 31st! 299 00:13:46,837 --> 00:13:49,805 Congratulations! None of that is correct. 300 00:13:49,807 --> 00:13:53,842 - April doesn't even have 31 days. - Aw, this is useless. 301 00:13:53,844 --> 00:13:56,044 You just need to focus. 302 00:13:56,046 --> 00:13:57,946 I think I can help. 303 00:13:58,781 --> 00:14:01,450 Now you don't have to pay attention to the road. 304 00:14:01,452 --> 00:14:04,353 - I actually think this is illegal. - Is it? 305 00:14:04,355 --> 00:14:06,588 What's the police code for the law we're breaking? 306 00:14:06,590 --> 00:14:10,058 - Uh... - I'll keep driving until you figure it out. 307 00:14:10,060 --> 00:14:13,028 Technically... there's no speed limit for us, right? 308 00:14:13,030 --> 00:14:16,420 Not if we're in pursuit of... Whoa! 309 00:14:17,166 --> 00:14:19,434 Wow, that's a long line. 310 00:14:19,436 --> 00:14:22,938 We're not lining up to talk to our own idiot son. 311 00:14:22,940 --> 00:14:25,507 Oh, great, Captain Kerfuffle's on the case. 312 00:14:25,509 --> 00:14:27,943 Outta the way, crumb lips. 313 00:14:27,945 --> 00:14:31,013 - I want to talk to that jackass. - No can do. 314 00:14:31,015 --> 00:14:33,749 Yes can do. Just open the rope. 315 00:14:33,751 --> 00:14:34,516 Hey! 316 00:14:34,518 --> 00:14:36,985 Emma, I'd be okay letting you in, 317 00:14:36,987 --> 00:14:39,921 - but not with the company you keep. - The company? 318 00:14:39,923 --> 00:14:42,858 She happens to be Vice President of this company. 319 00:14:42,860 --> 00:14:46,061 We don't need this. Come on, Emma. 320 00:14:46,063 --> 00:14:47,662 Right behind you. 321 00:14:49,832 --> 00:14:53,301 - Hey, Mom, what's up? - Hank, is that my purse? 322 00:14:53,303 --> 00:14:55,404 Just checking to see if I dropped my keys in here. 323 00:14:55,406 --> 00:14:58,173 I remember going through it last night looking for gum. 324 00:14:58,175 --> 00:15:01,209 We really need to start talking about boundaries. 325 00:15:01,211 --> 00:15:03,011 ...and your choice of gum flavours. 326 00:15:03,013 --> 00:15:05,580 Ugh. I give up. I can't find my keys anywhere! 327 00:15:05,582 --> 00:15:07,649 Is it possible they're not lost? 328 00:15:07,651 --> 00:15:12,220 - Maybe you gave them to someone? - Yes! I did do that! 329 00:15:12,222 --> 00:15:15,023 - Mystery solved! - Great! 330 00:15:15,025 --> 00:15:19,563 - Who did you give them to? - Uh... New mystery! 331 00:15:24,748 --> 00:15:27,067 Oscar, were you here last night? 332 00:15:27,069 --> 00:15:30,170 I gave my keys to someone, and I don't remember who. 333 00:15:30,172 --> 00:15:33,039 What kind of a moron gives someone his keys, 334 00:15:33,041 --> 00:15:36,776 and then doesn't have the brains to even... 335 00:15:36,778 --> 00:15:39,479 Dammit, Emma's right. 336 00:15:39,481 --> 00:15:43,750 - I am a kerfuffler. - A what? Oh... 337 00:15:43,752 --> 00:15:46,753 That's all right, I kerfuffled earlier too. 338 00:15:46,755 --> 00:15:49,622 In a crowd, no one can tell who did it. 339 00:15:49,624 --> 00:15:52,125 Does anyone have my keys? 340 00:15:52,127 --> 00:15:53,781 This job is great. 341 00:15:53,782 --> 00:15:58,732 You get to drive around all day, eatin' donuts, doin' donuts. 342 00:16:01,836 --> 00:16:04,104 Knock it off, I'm getting sick. 343 00:16:04,106 --> 00:16:06,973 It's hard enough to make these country music connections. 344 00:16:06,975 --> 00:16:10,343 What does a ghost truck driver have to do with police work? 345 00:16:10,945 --> 00:16:12,979 The trucker was a ghost? 346 00:16:12,981 --> 00:16:14,814 I thought the hitchhiker was a ghost. 347 00:16:14,816 --> 00:16:16,750 That was four songs ago. 348 00:16:16,752 --> 00:16:19,452 Hey, should those teenagers be out at night 349 00:16:19,454 --> 00:16:22,522 - tipping over PlastiPottys? - At night? No. 350 00:16:22,524 --> 00:16:25,825 They just need a firm talking to. I'll take care of it. 351 00:16:25,827 --> 00:16:28,695 I mean, nothing from these songs connects. 352 00:16:28,697 --> 00:16:30,864 "My wife left me, and she took my truck." 353 00:16:30,866 --> 00:16:33,967 What does that have to do with urinating in public? 354 00:16:33,969 --> 00:16:36,402 Okay, kids, time to wrap it up. 355 00:16:37,939 --> 00:16:39,639 Hey, now! 356 00:16:41,643 --> 00:16:43,977 Okay, kids, time to let me out. 357 00:16:43,979 --> 00:16:47,046 Kids? Kids? 358 00:16:47,048 --> 00:16:48,348 Kids! 359 00:16:48,350 --> 00:16:52,118 Wanda! Maybe the truck is the ghost. 360 00:16:52,120 --> 00:16:53,787 I gotta play that again. 361 00:16:53,789 --> 00:16:57,490 Let me out! This cubit reeks! 362 00:16:58,826 --> 00:17:01,895 Are all VIP sections this loud? 363 00:17:01,897 --> 00:17:04,063 Aw, thanks, but I ate earlier. 364 00:17:04,065 --> 00:17:05,932 What do you mean, I'm getting burlier? 365 00:17:05,934 --> 00:17:08,101 Oops, sorry. 366 00:17:08,103 --> 00:17:10,837 Come on, Lanny, that's the good rye. 367 00:17:10,839 --> 00:17:13,373 You're getting justice juice everywhere. 368 00:17:13,375 --> 00:17:14,707 Lacey, hand me a napkin. 369 00:17:14,709 --> 00:17:18,278 Lacey? Well, now, where did she... 370 00:17:18,280 --> 00:17:22,682 This is abuse of my private area. 371 00:17:33,794 --> 00:17:35,595 Well, you took your sweet time. 372 00:17:35,597 --> 00:17:37,197 - Where you been? - Nowhere fun. 373 00:17:37,298 --> 00:17:39,132 I'd rather be here with you. 374 00:17:39,134 --> 00:17:40,800 Can I get you folks another round? 375 00:17:40,802 --> 00:17:44,871 About time! I've been sitting here for... 376 00:17:44,873 --> 00:17:46,439 a while now, yeah, 377 00:17:46,441 --> 00:17:49,809 and you look like you're having a busy night, and... 378 00:17:49,811 --> 00:17:51,945 I'll have another drink when you have a minute. 379 00:17:51,947 --> 00:17:53,580 Are you kidding me? 380 00:17:53,582 --> 00:17:56,015 I've been holding this empty glass for a half hour. 381 00:17:56,017 --> 00:17:58,051 Would it kill you to hire some help, 382 00:17:58,053 --> 00:18:01,554 - you cheapskate? - Yeah, you tell 'em, baby! 383 00:18:01,556 --> 00:18:04,457 Mrs. Kerfuffle is on the case! 384 00:18:04,459 --> 00:18:06,559 I learned from the master. 385 00:18:07,995 --> 00:18:11,231 - Aw, that's sweet. - Gaah! What the hell? 386 00:18:11,233 --> 00:18:12,866 Emma, did I give you my keys? 387 00:18:12,868 --> 00:18:16,202 - No. Did I give you a beating? - No. 388 00:18:16,337 --> 00:18:18,204 I will if you don't get lost. 389 00:18:19,874 --> 00:18:22,175 Karen, you're not doing a very good job 390 00:18:22,177 --> 00:18:23,776 of keeping people out. 391 00:18:23,778 --> 00:18:27,847 - Do you think it's the T-shirt? - I swear to... No. 392 00:18:27,849 --> 00:18:30,016 Brent told me to let everyone in. 393 00:18:30,018 --> 00:18:33,586 He did? Why would he want everyone... 394 00:18:36,523 --> 00:18:39,325 Ah... I see what you did. 395 00:18:39,327 --> 00:18:43,196 - Very clever. - Yep. I'm always thinking ahead. 396 00:18:43,198 --> 00:18:45,298 How long have you been planning this? 397 00:18:45,300 --> 00:18:48,768 - About a minute and a half. - So not too far ahead. 398 00:18:48,770 --> 00:18:52,338 I've talked to everyone, and no one has my keys. 399 00:18:52,340 --> 00:18:54,774 Hmm, well, everyone who was here last night 400 00:18:54,776 --> 00:18:57,010 is here now, except Wanda. 401 00:18:57,012 --> 00:18:58,811 Wanda! That's it! 402 00:18:58,813 --> 00:19:00,914 - Where is she? - I dunno. 403 00:19:00,916 --> 00:19:03,016 Another mystery! 404 00:19:03,018 --> 00:19:04,784 I'm like Sherlock Holmes and Scooby-Doo 405 00:19:04,786 --> 00:19:07,720 - rolled into one. - Except they solve mysteries. 406 00:19:07,722 --> 00:19:09,255 You get drunk and create them. 407 00:19:09,257 --> 00:19:11,024 Otherwise, very similar. 408 00:19:11,326 --> 00:19:14,427 Well, that didn't work. 409 00:19:14,429 --> 00:19:16,296 I know. It's all fun and games 410 00:19:16,298 --> 00:19:18,798 until you get a pant-full of sewage... 411 00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:21,935 - that's not your own. - No, I'm talking about your system. 412 00:19:21,937 --> 00:19:24,304 It hasn't improved my memory at all. 413 00:19:24,306 --> 00:19:27,106 I just want to listen to Elden Hacksaw 414 00:19:27,108 --> 00:19:28,875 and not have to think about work. 415 00:19:28,877 --> 00:19:32,011 Hacksaw? I thought you said his name was Bucksaw. 416 00:19:32,013 --> 00:19:33,446 Great, now I can't even 417 00:19:33,448 --> 00:19:35,448 remember facts about country music. 418 00:19:35,450 --> 00:19:37,951 Your stupid method ruined my memory. 419 00:19:37,953 --> 00:19:39,786 It's not my fault your brain's corrupted 420 00:19:39,788 --> 00:19:41,454 with all that dumb country junk. 421 00:19:41,456 --> 00:19:43,589 This method has worked on monkeys. 422 00:19:44,793 --> 00:19:47,827 Hey, Wanda, I gave you my keys last night. 423 00:19:47,829 --> 00:19:49,128 No, you didn't. 424 00:19:49,130 --> 00:19:50,697 Or... hang on... 425 00:19:50,699 --> 00:19:53,800 Here. Hold my keys till tomorrow, 426 00:19:53,802 --> 00:19:56,235 and don't let me forget. 427 00:19:56,237 --> 00:19:58,571 Oh, yeah, I forgot. 428 00:19:58,573 --> 00:20:02,575 - So where are they? - Uh... I don't remember. 429 00:20:02,577 --> 00:20:05,812 What's that? You don't remember? 430 00:20:05,814 --> 00:20:09,315 Now who's the dumb country monkey, huh? 431 00:20:09,317 --> 00:20:12,518 Wait, I think I have that song. 432 00:20:12,520 --> 00:20:15,521 ♪ She's my little country monkey ♪ 433 00:20:15,523 --> 00:20:16,990 ♪ Boop-boop ♪ 434 00:20:16,992 --> 00:20:18,257 ♪ Bourbon and bananas ♪ 435 00:20:18,259 --> 00:20:21,761 ♪ and her fur-lined pyjamas at the zoo ♪ 436 00:20:21,763 --> 00:20:23,863 ♪ Boop-boo! ♪ 437 00:20:27,532 --> 00:20:30,567 - How was work? - Aah! What are you doing here? 438 00:20:30,569 --> 00:20:31,902 I'm looking for Hank's keys. 439 00:20:31,904 --> 00:20:33,064 He gave them to me last night, 440 00:20:33,088 --> 00:20:34,838 and I'm retracing his steps. 441 00:20:34,840 --> 00:20:39,443 If you had them, why are you retracing his steps? 442 00:20:39,445 --> 00:20:42,279 Because... I don't know! 443 00:20:42,281 --> 00:20:44,815 I can't think. Put on some country music. 444 00:20:44,817 --> 00:20:46,850 How about I put on some coffee? 445 00:20:46,852 --> 00:20:49,019 ♪ She's puttin' on some coffee ♪ 446 00:20:49,021 --> 00:20:51,788 ♪ Some bourbon and bananas ♪ 447 00:20:51,790 --> 00:20:53,957 ♪ And fur-lined pyjamas... ♪ 448 00:20:53,959 --> 00:20:57,561 Wait, if you haven't found the keys yet, 449 00:20:57,563 --> 00:21:01,698 - then where's... - Lacey, do you have any bath bombs? 450 00:21:05,771 --> 00:21:07,103 ♪ I don't know ♪ 451 00:21:07,105 --> 00:21:11,289 ♪ The same things you don't know ♪ 452 00:21:13,244 --> 00:21:14,945 ♪ I don't know ♪ 453 00:21:14,947 --> 00:21:18,641 ♪ I just... don't know ♪ 454 00:21:20,551 --> 00:21:22,686 ♪ Ooh ♪ 455 00:21:22,688 --> 00:21:26,423 - ♪ It's a great big place ♪ - ♪ Ooh ♪ 456 00:21:26,525 --> 00:21:30,060 - ♪ Full of nothin' but space ♪ - ♪ Ooh ♪ 457 00:21:30,162 --> 00:21:33,930 - ♪ And it's my happy place ♪ - ♪ I don't know ♪ 458 00:21:35,712 --> 00:21:38,851 sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~ 35939

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