Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,127 --> 00:00:02,750
sync & correction by f1nc0
~ Addic7ed.com ~
2
00:00:03,537 --> 00:00:05,771
- I'm just gonna say it.
- Say what?
3
00:00:05,773 --> 00:00:07,973
You forgot today is
my birthday, didn't you?
4
00:00:07,975 --> 00:00:09,824
Forgot? Hardly.
5
00:00:09,859 --> 00:00:13,179
In fact, my first of many
presents is the day off.
6
00:00:13,291 --> 00:00:15,024
Go home and rest up.
7
00:00:15,026 --> 00:00:17,092
I've got a hell
of an evening planned.
8
00:00:17,094 --> 00:00:19,995
Really?
Oh, that is great news!
9
00:00:19,997 --> 00:00:22,898
I am sick of seeing
my friends' birthday parties
10
00:00:22,900 --> 00:00:25,000
on Instagram.
If I see one more pic
11
00:00:25,002 --> 00:00:27,803
of Denise's "Plastered at
the Parthenon" party in Greece,
12
00:00:27,805 --> 00:00:31,040
- I'm gonna toss my tzatziki.
- Oupa!
13
00:00:31,042 --> 00:00:33,709
Well, tonight is going to be epic.
14
00:00:33,711 --> 00:00:36,278
A birthday you'll never forget.
15
00:00:36,280 --> 00:00:38,013
I forgot Karen's birthday!
16
00:00:38,015 --> 00:00:39,849
You gotta help me,
or I'm a dead man!
17
00:00:39,851 --> 00:00:41,917
Oh, no, that's terrible,
18
00:00:41,919 --> 00:00:43,752
but I'm not actually open yet.
19
00:00:43,754 --> 00:00:45,354
Can you come back in 10 minutes?
20
00:00:45,356 --> 00:00:49,158
♪ You think there's not
a lot goin' on ♪
21
00:00:49,160 --> 00:00:52,495
♪ Look closer, baby
you're so wrong ♪
22
00:00:56,620 --> 00:00:59,739
How could I have forgotten
Karen's birthday?
23
00:00:59,741 --> 00:01:01,841
I dunno. How'd you forget
all the other years?
24
00:01:01,843 --> 00:01:04,243
I should have at least
done the pink flamingo gag.
25
00:01:04,245 --> 00:01:07,115
- What's the pink flamingo gag?
- It's a classic.
26
00:01:07,150 --> 00:01:10,057
Uh, if it was a classic,
I think I would've heard of it.
27
00:01:10,687 --> 00:01:12,071
You put
a bunch of pink flamingoes
28
00:01:12,073 --> 00:01:13,272
on a person's lawn at night,
29
00:01:13,274 --> 00:01:15,354
so when they wake up
in the morning...
30
00:01:15,356 --> 00:01:17,890
Boom! Lawn full
of pink flamingoes!
31
00:01:19,060 --> 00:01:21,785
Oh, no...
Oh, that's awesome!
32
00:01:21,820 --> 00:01:23,507
Why don't you just do that one?
33
00:01:23,542 --> 00:01:25,464
'Cause she's already
awake, dinglenuts.
34
00:01:25,466 --> 00:01:27,900
Okay, Karen's party,
what can I do to help?
35
00:01:27,902 --> 00:01:30,136
- Where is it happening?
- How about at the bar?
36
00:01:30,138 --> 00:01:33,572
We always go to the bar.
This has to be special.
37
00:01:33,574 --> 00:01:34,507
So book the town hall.
38
00:01:34,574 --> 00:01:36,609
Every event is catered
by the Kitchen Committee.
39
00:01:36,611 --> 00:01:39,336
That'll take care of the food
and the birthday cake.
40
00:01:39,521 --> 00:01:41,263
Not the stupid
Kitchen Committee!
41
00:01:41,265 --> 00:01:45,134
Everything they make
is so boring and beige.
42
00:01:45,136 --> 00:01:48,270
Bland, boiled perogies,
dry vanilla sheet cake.
43
00:01:48,272 --> 00:01:51,040
Well, Karen's favourite
dessert is macaroons.
44
00:01:51,042 --> 00:01:52,975
Great!
So I'll make macaroons,
45
00:01:52,977 --> 00:01:55,196
and the stupid Kitchen Committee
can make their regular
46
00:01:55,197 --> 00:01:57,413
crappy garbage, and we'll
all pretend we like it.
47
00:01:57,415 --> 00:01:59,014
You'd have to get
their approval.
48
00:01:59,016 --> 00:02:00,516
Okay.
Who's in charge?
49
00:02:01,918 --> 00:02:03,919
Oh.
50
00:02:08,491 --> 00:02:11,994
Happy birthday, partner.
51
00:02:12,973 --> 00:02:17,833
Is that Arcade Fire?
Wow, they're versatile.
52
00:02:17,835 --> 00:02:21,670
We're getting a free dinner
with this gig, right?
53
00:02:21,672 --> 00:02:25,801
Oh, Davis, you're
the best partner ever!
54
00:02:25,889 --> 00:02:28,611
And to top it off,
here to dance with you
55
00:02:28,613 --> 00:02:31,714
is that handsome
movie star you like.
56
00:02:31,716 --> 00:02:33,182
What's his name...?
57
00:02:33,184 --> 00:02:35,651
How do I know
what movie star she likes?
58
00:02:35,653 --> 00:02:38,220
Plus a chandelier, satin drapes?
59
00:02:38,222 --> 00:02:42,224
- That's a lot to organize in one day.
- You're right. I'm screwed.
60
00:02:42,226 --> 00:02:46,195
Relax, I'm here to help.
So, first things first.
61
00:02:46,197 --> 00:02:48,197
Does Arcade Fire
get a free meal each,
62
00:02:48,199 --> 00:02:50,957
or one to share?
63
00:02:50,992 --> 00:02:52,468
Corner Gas.
64
00:02:52,470 --> 00:02:55,711
I have an emergency.
Get over here!
65
00:02:56,781 --> 00:02:58,013
Grabbing a few snacks.
66
00:02:58,015 --> 00:03:00,049
Heading home
to watch TV in my PJs.
67
00:03:00,051 --> 00:03:02,084
Got the whole
rest of the day off.
68
00:03:02,086 --> 00:03:06,255
Great, watch the store for me.
There's an emergency.
69
00:03:06,957 --> 00:03:10,192
'Cause it's my birthday.
Thanks for asking.
70
00:03:10,194 --> 00:03:14,296
I'm sorry for saying the Kitchen
Committee sucks and is boring.
71
00:03:14,298 --> 00:03:17,366
Well, I stand by the boring,
and the sucking.
72
00:03:17,368 --> 00:03:19,368
It is the same menu
every time.
73
00:03:19,370 --> 00:03:21,837
Maybe we should
shake things up a bit.
74
00:03:21,839 --> 00:03:24,907
You know what,
you can make the dessert.
75
00:03:24,909 --> 00:03:26,675
Really?
Thanks, Wanda!
76
00:03:26,677 --> 00:03:29,622
Is the rest of the committee
gonna be okay with this?
77
00:03:30,915 --> 00:03:33,148
Oh, they will be
if I tell them to be.
78
00:03:33,150 --> 00:03:35,484
I run that committee.
79
00:03:36,286 --> 00:03:39,255
- I've been kicked off the committee.
- Oh, I'm so sorry.
80
00:03:39,257 --> 00:03:41,724
No, screw that pack
of crusty cranks.
81
00:03:41,726 --> 00:03:44,660
They want to keep boiling up
recipes from World War I,
82
00:03:44,662 --> 00:03:45,662
that's their problem.
83
00:03:45,695 --> 00:03:48,063
You're still making
those macaroons for Karen,
84
00:03:48,065 --> 00:03:51,133
and those backward butt-wipes
can go pound sand!
85
00:03:51,135 --> 00:03:53,435
Well, with people skills like that,
86
00:03:53,437 --> 00:03:55,838
I can't believe
they kicked you out.
87
00:03:55,840 --> 00:03:58,440
Ah, it's all politics.
88
00:04:00,710 --> 00:04:01,977
Hey, Mom, where's Dad?
89
00:04:01,979 --> 00:04:05,981
- I got a call saying...
- Shut your yap, and get down here!
90
00:04:05,983 --> 00:04:07,316
Never mind,
I think I found him.
91
00:04:07,318 --> 00:04:09,885
Okay, so what's the emergency?
92
00:04:09,887 --> 00:04:12,688
We're knee-deep
in water, jackass!
93
00:04:12,690 --> 00:04:14,090
Oh, this isn't on purpose?
94
00:04:14,091 --> 00:04:15,658
I didn't want to paddle
to conclusions.
95
00:04:15,660 --> 00:04:19,061
Okay, so you got a sump pump,
or a million sponges,
96
00:04:19,063 --> 00:04:19,995
or what's the plan?
97
00:04:19,997 --> 00:04:23,499
The plan is you get out of here
and leave me alone.
98
00:04:23,501 --> 00:04:26,201
Ah. See, on the phone,
you said, "I need your help.
99
00:04:26,203 --> 00:04:28,571
Get over here."
I must've misunderstood.
100
00:04:28,573 --> 00:04:30,239
I need you here, up there,
101
00:04:30,241 --> 00:04:33,008
distracting your mother
while I clean this up.
102
00:04:33,010 --> 00:04:36,312
She's been nagging me for months
to fix the damn water heater.
103
00:04:36,314 --> 00:04:38,480
- And did you?
- Oh, you're smart.
104
00:04:38,482 --> 00:04:41,383
Okie-dokie.
I'm off to distract Mom.
105
00:04:41,385 --> 00:04:43,452
I wouldn't want this to tarnish
her impression of you.
106
00:04:43,454 --> 00:04:45,187
She holds you
in such high regard.
107
00:04:45,189 --> 00:04:48,958
We'll need music,
balloons, tablecloths,
108
00:04:48,960 --> 00:04:51,393
table candles, table cards...
109
00:04:51,395 --> 00:04:54,530
- I hope they have tables.
- We still doing the flamingo thing?
110
00:04:54,532 --> 00:04:57,566
- I'm telling ya, it's a classic.
- I told you "it's a classic."
111
00:04:57,568 --> 00:04:59,501
I also told you it's too late.
112
00:04:59,503 --> 00:05:01,604
We could put a bunch
of flamingoes in town hall.
113
00:05:01,606 --> 00:05:03,939
Still hilarious.
Think outside the box.
114
00:05:03,941 --> 00:05:05,007
When it comes to thinking,
115
00:05:05,075 --> 00:05:07,810
you probably shouldn't wander
too far from the box.
116
00:05:07,812 --> 00:05:09,812
What box?
117
00:05:11,781 --> 00:05:14,049
Mom!
I thought you were outside.
118
00:05:14,051 --> 00:05:16,185
I was.
Now I'm inside.
119
00:05:16,187 --> 00:05:18,354
Those doors
are really paying off.
120
00:05:18,356 --> 00:05:21,290
Good one.
You're good at sarcasm.
121
00:05:21,292 --> 00:05:22,858
Hey, let's take a walk
to higher ground,
122
00:05:22,860 --> 00:05:25,087
and you can tell me how you
come up with those zingers.
123
00:05:25,111 --> 00:05:27,396
- No, thanks.
- Boom! Two for two.
124
00:05:27,398 --> 00:05:30,099
Okay, well, uh...
how about we just sit up here
125
00:05:30,100 --> 00:05:33,603
- on the main floor and talk?
- All right, let's talk about
126
00:05:33,604 --> 00:05:36,205
why your pants are wet
from the knees down.
127
00:05:36,207 --> 00:05:38,207
Oh, that's the latest trend.
128
00:05:38,209 --> 00:05:41,024
Used to be saggy pants,
now soggy.
129
00:05:41,059 --> 00:05:44,346
Okay, follow-up question.
Why aren't you at work?
130
00:05:44,348 --> 00:05:46,882
- Karen's watching the place.
- Karen?
131
00:05:46,884 --> 00:05:49,184
- Cop Karen?
- Yeah, she begged me to let her.
132
00:05:49,186 --> 00:05:51,387
Wanted a taste
of the retail life, I guess.
133
00:05:51,389 --> 00:05:53,322
Who could blame her?
Pretty glamorous.
134
00:05:53,324 --> 00:05:56,325
This is 10-W40.
You got any 10-W30?
135
00:05:56,327 --> 00:05:57,960
I don't know,
I don't work here.
136
00:05:57,962 --> 00:06:00,629
- Then why are you behind the counter?
- It's my day off.
137
00:06:00,631 --> 00:06:02,231
That doesn't make any sense.
138
00:06:02,233 --> 00:06:04,967
Makes even less sense
if you know it's my birthday.
139
00:06:04,969 --> 00:06:07,002
That's a long list of stuff.
140
00:06:07,004 --> 00:06:09,325
Better get moving
if you're gonna get all that done.
141
00:06:09,349 --> 00:06:12,342
What, I'm doing all this?
What are you doing?
142
00:06:12,343 --> 00:06:16,412
I have to round up guests to make
sure there's people at her party.
143
00:06:16,414 --> 00:06:18,313
Look, if you get
all that stuff done,
144
00:06:18,315 --> 00:06:21,384
- you can do the flamingo gag.
- Sold!
145
00:06:25,923 --> 00:06:26,789
Have you fixed it yet?
146
00:06:26,923 --> 00:06:29,191
I don't know how long
I can keep Mom occupied.
147
00:06:29,193 --> 00:06:33,862
I give you one job, and you can't
even do that for ten minutes!
148
00:06:33,864 --> 00:06:36,832
- You're useless.
- I suppose I am.
149
00:06:36,834 --> 00:06:39,268
Mom!
Dad flooded the basement!
150
00:06:39,270 --> 00:06:42,171
Whoopsie.
Silly, useless me.
151
00:06:42,173 --> 00:06:47,076
- What the hell happened?
- Hello, my pet.
152
00:06:47,078 --> 00:06:49,578
- There she is!
- Hi, guys. What's up?
153
00:06:49,580 --> 00:06:52,448
- You tell us what's up.
- Yeah, what's up, Lacey?
154
00:06:52,450 --> 00:06:54,120
Little Miss "What's Up"?
155
00:06:54,155 --> 00:06:58,020
Okay, now that that's settled,
what can I get you?
156
00:06:58,022 --> 00:07:00,155
Where do you get off
thinking you can neuter
157
00:07:00,156 --> 00:07:01,323
the Kitchen Committee?
158
00:07:01,325 --> 00:07:03,559
Oh, you're the Kitchen Committee.
I can explain...
159
00:07:03,727 --> 00:07:06,261
No need to explain
anything, Lacey.
160
00:07:06,263 --> 00:07:08,263
"This is
the Kitchen Committee."
161
00:07:08,265 --> 00:07:10,726
- We've established...
- And it looks like they made
162
00:07:10,726 --> 00:07:14,123
- a wrong turn and ended up on our turf.
- Our "turf"?
163
00:07:14,158 --> 00:07:16,371
Word on the street is
you think you can bring dessert
164
00:07:16,373 --> 00:07:19,074
- to a committee event.
- The street?
165
00:07:19,076 --> 00:07:20,175
Are we on The Wire?
166
00:07:20,177 --> 00:07:22,411
We do what we want
when we want.
167
00:07:22,413 --> 00:07:23,712
- Huh!
- Hey!
168
00:07:23,714 --> 00:07:25,180
I was just making a point.
169
00:07:25,182 --> 00:07:28,083
You want war,
we'll give you a war.
170
00:07:28,085 --> 00:07:30,586
- No one wants war.
- I'd love a war!
171
00:07:30,588 --> 00:07:32,921
I was just saying I could
go for some trench foot
172
00:07:32,923 --> 00:07:34,690
- and mustard gas.
- She really wasn't.
173
00:07:34,791 --> 00:07:37,626
Well, if you don't
want our dessert,
174
00:07:37,628 --> 00:07:40,295
maybe we won't
make dinner either.
175
00:07:40,297 --> 00:07:42,464
- Let's not...
- Good! Who needs you?!
176
00:07:42,466 --> 00:07:46,001
Lacey and I will make the
dessert and the dinner!
177
00:07:46,003 --> 00:07:48,737
- We'll what?
- Good luck.
178
00:07:48,739 --> 00:07:51,514
We sure told them.
179
00:07:51,549 --> 00:07:54,643
What is wrong with you?
180
00:07:57,940 --> 00:08:00,375
Oh, hey,
Kitchen Committee.
181
00:08:00,377 --> 00:08:02,076
I heard about Karen's
birthday dinner.
182
00:08:02,078 --> 00:08:05,012
Oh, baby, I can't wait to
fill my gut with your perogies.
183
00:08:05,014 --> 00:08:07,148
Well, we're not doing the dinner,
184
00:08:07,150 --> 00:08:09,717
so there won't be any perogies.
185
00:08:09,719 --> 00:08:11,952
Great, looking forward to it.
186
00:08:12,354 --> 00:08:14,956
Wait, what did you say,
and why do you want to hurt me?
187
00:08:14,958 --> 00:08:17,558
What have you gotten me into?
188
00:08:17,560 --> 00:08:20,895
I can't cater dinner
and dessert by myself.
189
00:08:20,897 --> 00:08:23,564
Who said "by yourself"?
I can cook too, you know.
190
00:08:23,566 --> 00:08:25,600
I was head of
the Kitchen Committee.
191
00:08:25,602 --> 00:08:27,769
I feed my kid every day.
192
00:08:27,771 --> 00:08:30,671
Wait, did I...?
I'll be right back.
193
00:08:30,673 --> 00:08:32,948
Okay, explain to me
what the Kitchen Committee
194
00:08:32,949 --> 00:08:35,090
just explained to me, and
then tell me they're wrong.
195
00:08:35,114 --> 00:08:36,010
They're not wrong.
196
00:08:36,012 --> 00:08:37,492
We're cooking
Karen's birthday dinner.
197
00:08:37,516 --> 00:08:38,846
So you're making their perogies?
198
00:08:38,848 --> 00:08:40,181
I don't know what we're making,
199
00:08:40,183 --> 00:08:42,917
but it's not going to be
boring old perogies.
200
00:08:42,919 --> 00:08:44,218
I see, but you could make
201
00:08:44,220 --> 00:08:46,621
a couple dozen boring
old perogies for me, right?
202
00:08:46,623 --> 00:08:49,624
Make your own perogies.
You sell frozen ones at Corner Gas.
203
00:08:49,626 --> 00:08:52,593
No, the store-bought ones
aren't as yummy.
204
00:08:52,595 --> 00:08:55,530
The Kitchen Committee has
some special secret recipe.
205
00:08:55,532 --> 00:08:57,932
Then go find their recipe
and make some.
206
00:08:57,934 --> 00:09:00,902
The recipe.
Sure, how hard can it be?
207
00:09:00,904 --> 00:09:03,305
I can read.
I can work a spoon.
208
00:09:04,139 --> 00:09:08,042
Honestly, sometimes he's
like a helpless child.
209
00:09:08,044 --> 00:09:10,478
Right, I gotta go.
210
00:09:11,814 --> 00:09:15,216
Okay, listen, before you get
all mad, just hear me out.
211
00:09:17,620 --> 00:09:18,653
You're chuckling.
212
00:09:18,655 --> 00:09:20,254
Is that angry chuckling?
213
00:09:20,256 --> 00:09:22,790
I knew you wouldn't fix
the water heater,
214
00:09:22,792 --> 00:09:24,091
and it was just a matter of time
215
00:09:24,093 --> 00:09:25,927
before something
like this happened,
216
00:09:25,929 --> 00:09:29,130
so I already took
everything I cared about
217
00:09:29,132 --> 00:09:30,164
out of the basement.
218
00:09:30,166 --> 00:09:32,099
Not everything.
219
00:09:32,101 --> 00:09:34,703
That flowered hat I
bought you is right there,
220
00:09:34,704 --> 00:09:39,440
- and it's ruined.
- I said "everything I cared about."
221
00:09:44,013 --> 00:09:45,346
Thanks for your help.
222
00:09:45,348 --> 00:09:47,615
My back isn't what
it was 20 years ago.
223
00:09:47,617 --> 00:09:50,685
Mine isn't what it was
20 seconds ago.
224
00:09:50,687 --> 00:09:54,121
This is like
10 years' worth of wiper fluid.
225
00:09:54,123 --> 00:09:55,857
How long do you think
you're gonna live?
226
00:09:55,859 --> 00:10:00,261
Well, sorry! How'd you like it
if I took my business elsewhere?
227
00:10:00,263 --> 00:10:02,763
If you would've taken it
elsewhere before you took it here,
228
00:10:02,765 --> 00:10:04,799
I would've loved it.
229
00:10:06,869 --> 00:10:07,735
I made this for you.
230
00:10:07,737 --> 00:10:09,805
- Oh, sweetheart...
- I know, right?
231
00:10:09,806 --> 00:10:11,038
Karen's birthday party tonight.
232
00:10:11,040 --> 00:10:12,940
8:00. Town Hall.
Be there.
233
00:10:12,942 --> 00:10:16,611
- We can't. It's our date night.
- I see.
234
00:10:16,613 --> 00:10:19,046
Well, looks like
I have to give you guys a ticket
235
00:10:19,048 --> 00:10:22,250
- for loitering.
- Loitering? We're having a picnic.
236
00:10:22,252 --> 00:10:25,152
- Open liquor...
- This is non-alcoholic beer.
237
00:10:25,154 --> 00:10:30,024
- ...impersonating liquor. There.
- 500 bucks?
238
00:10:30,026 --> 00:10:33,594
- Or come to Karen's party tonight.
- That's extortion.
239
00:10:33,596 --> 00:10:36,230
Hmm, never looked
at it like that.
240
00:10:36,232 --> 00:10:37,865
See you at 8:00!
241
00:10:39,034 --> 00:10:43,137
You left this coat down
there too! I gave you this.
242
00:10:43,139 --> 00:10:45,172
Are you saying
you don't like it?
243
00:10:45,174 --> 00:10:47,241
It's ugly, ripped,
244
00:10:47,243 --> 00:10:50,011
smells like a wet dog,
and that was before the flood.
245
00:10:50,013 --> 00:10:50,845
When you shop for me,
246
00:10:50,847 --> 00:10:53,514
do you just grab
the first thing you see?
247
00:10:54,750 --> 00:10:56,384
Aah!
248
00:10:57,286 --> 00:11:00,322
This one's damaged.
Discount!
249
00:11:00,789 --> 00:11:03,591
Yeah, well you've given me
plenty of crappy gifts.
250
00:11:03,593 --> 00:11:05,960
Maybe I'll toss some of those
in the water.
251
00:11:06,092 --> 00:11:07,591
That'll show me.
252
00:11:07,593 --> 00:11:10,061
There you are, Nate,
one bowl of soup,
253
00:11:10,063 --> 00:11:12,730
just like Helen, who
ordered soup two minutes ago.
254
00:11:12,732 --> 00:11:14,765
Mavis, are you
going to want a soup too?
255
00:11:14,767 --> 00:11:16,634
Because I'm kinda busy
back there.
256
00:11:16,636 --> 00:11:18,803
Oh, no, thank you, dear.
257
00:11:18,805 --> 00:11:21,205
Step one,
separate the eggs...
258
00:11:21,207 --> 00:11:24,208
Lacey,
can I have some soup?
259
00:11:25,178 --> 00:11:27,511
Okay, separate the...
260
00:11:27,513 --> 00:11:29,980
Lacey,
my soup's too hot.
261
00:11:31,184 --> 00:11:36,569
Okay, let's try this again.
Separate the...
262
00:11:36,955 --> 00:11:39,090
All right!
Separate the eggs...
263
00:11:39,092 --> 00:11:40,257
My spoon's too big!
264
00:11:40,259 --> 00:11:42,426
I know what you're doing!
265
00:11:43,428 --> 00:11:45,629
Hey, you teenagers
drinking in the park,
266
00:11:45,631 --> 00:11:47,264
do you know where
there's more booze?
267
00:11:47,266 --> 00:11:50,468
Karen's party
at the Town Hall tonight!
268
00:11:50,470 --> 00:11:52,136
Tell your parents!
269
00:11:52,138 --> 00:11:55,005
Or I'll tell your parents.
270
00:11:55,007 --> 00:11:56,073
Hello?
271
00:11:56,208 --> 00:11:58,809
The streamers are streamed,
the balloons are ballooned.
272
00:11:58,811 --> 00:12:00,911
I decked the hell out of this hall.
273
00:12:00,913 --> 00:12:03,581
Nice! Just as long as
there's no yellow, okay?
274
00:12:03,583 --> 00:12:05,583
Karen hates yellow.
275
00:12:09,322 --> 00:12:11,822
Well, what do we have here?
276
00:12:11,824 --> 00:12:14,558
The Christmas jam-jams
you got me.
277
00:12:14,560 --> 00:12:17,294
Maybe I'll toss those in the...
278
00:12:17,296 --> 00:12:20,498
No, these are way too cozy.
279
00:12:20,500 --> 00:12:23,601
Oh, here we go,
my good birthday shirt.
280
00:12:23,603 --> 00:12:25,369
It's basement bath time for...
281
00:12:25,371 --> 00:12:29,340
Hmm... then what'll
I wear on my birthday?
282
00:12:29,342 --> 00:12:31,776
Or my funeral?
283
00:12:31,778 --> 00:12:35,312
A-ha!
These useless Easter...
284
00:12:35,314 --> 00:12:39,416
I can't get rid of
these corn cuddlers.
285
00:12:39,418 --> 00:12:42,119
Damn her thoughtful hide.
286
00:12:43,655 --> 00:12:45,556
Where the hell
are the macaroons?
287
00:12:45,558 --> 00:12:47,892
Ugh. The committee's got me
running around so much,
288
00:12:47,894 --> 00:12:49,827
- I haven't started.
- The committee?
289
00:12:49,829 --> 00:12:52,029
Why are you
sleeping with the enemy?
290
00:12:52,031 --> 00:12:54,665
- Just tell 'em to get lost.
- They're customers.
291
00:12:54,667 --> 00:12:58,269
My reputation means
everything. I can't just...
292
00:13:04,476 --> 00:13:06,844
- What did you say to them?
- I just told them
293
00:13:06,912 --> 00:13:08,979
you keep free-range rats
in the kitchen.
294
00:13:08,981 --> 00:13:11,582
What?!
That could ruin my business!
295
00:13:11,584 --> 00:13:14,118
Whoa, whoa.
One problem at a time.
296
00:13:14,120 --> 00:13:17,488
We really want you guys
to play at Karen's birthday,
297
00:13:17,490 --> 00:13:20,324
but we can't afford
to give you each a meal.
298
00:13:20,326 --> 00:13:21,792
How about we share
one meal,
299
00:13:21,794 --> 00:13:23,761
but we each get a dessert?
300
00:13:23,763 --> 00:13:28,199
Are you sure we're safe in
this arcade? It is on fire.
301
00:13:28,201 --> 00:13:31,502
We're fine. You're dreaming
this whole thing anyway.
302
00:13:31,504 --> 00:13:33,437
I'm going to kick you
in the ribs now.
303
00:13:33,439 --> 00:13:34,872
What? Why?
304
00:13:34,874 --> 00:13:37,341
Ow!
Hey, watch it.
305
00:13:37,343 --> 00:13:39,243
Sorry to interrupt nap time.
306
00:13:39,245 --> 00:13:41,612
I wasn't napping,
I fainted.
307
00:13:41,614 --> 00:13:43,447
Guess I blew so hard
I passed out.
308
00:13:43,449 --> 00:13:45,382
I read that on
a bathroom wall once.
309
00:13:45,384 --> 00:13:46,851
Why didn't you just use that?
310
00:13:47,986 --> 00:13:50,221
No way.
I'm savin' that for Karaoke.
311
00:13:50,223 --> 00:13:53,023
Well, knock yourself out...
again.
312
00:13:53,025 --> 00:13:55,226
Sorry I can't help.
I'm on a mission.
313
00:13:55,228 --> 00:13:58,095
A mission... impossible!
314
00:14:07,906 --> 00:14:10,474
Oh, that was
surprisingly possible.
315
00:14:10,476 --> 00:14:11,876
...and then it hit me.
316
00:14:11,878 --> 00:14:15,246
I gotta step it up
and get Emma a thoughtful gift.
317
00:14:15,248 --> 00:14:17,648
Something real special,
you know?
318
00:14:17,650 --> 00:14:21,518
- So you came to a gas station?
- What, I should go to Foo Mart?
319
00:14:21,520 --> 00:14:23,420
Oh, looks like
the brick delivery's here.
320
00:14:23,422 --> 00:14:24,688
You better bring those in.
321
00:14:24,690 --> 00:14:27,458
Ugh, why is everything so heavy,
322
00:14:27,460 --> 00:14:29,260
and why is Brent selling bricks?
323
00:14:29,262 --> 00:14:32,129
Is he supposed to give
them away? Use your head.
324
00:14:32,131 --> 00:14:35,099
The hall's done, and Hank's
gone to get flamingoes.
325
00:14:35,101 --> 00:14:38,736
Ooh, these look good,
and they smell yummy,
326
00:14:38,738 --> 00:14:40,537
like a high-end sun block.
327
00:14:40,539 --> 00:14:42,706
Mm. That's what
we were going for.
328
00:14:44,176 --> 00:14:47,344
Okay, 20.
Where's the other 180?
329
00:14:47,346 --> 00:14:49,980
200 people?
That can't be right.
330
00:14:49,982 --> 00:14:51,315
Oh, it isn't.
331
00:14:51,317 --> 00:14:53,684
I didn't count us.
It's 203.
332
00:14:58,537 --> 00:15:02,572
- We can't cook for 200.
- 203.
333
00:15:02,574 --> 00:15:04,140
Whatever!
We don't have enough time
334
00:15:04,142 --> 00:15:06,142
to make 180 macaroons
and dinner.
335
00:15:06,144 --> 00:15:08,478
- Dinner's off.
- What? No!
336
00:15:08,480 --> 00:15:11,080
The party will suck, and
Karen'll never talk to me again.
337
00:15:11,082 --> 00:15:13,216
I'll die alone and friendless.
338
00:15:13,218 --> 00:15:16,066
- You're saying we're not your friends?
- That's a load off.
339
00:15:16,101 --> 00:15:17,954
Look, you keep
making macaroons here,
340
00:15:17,956 --> 00:15:19,722
I'll go home
and whip something up there.
341
00:15:19,724 --> 00:15:21,057
That could work.
342
00:15:21,059 --> 00:15:25,094
Just make sure it's something
special, and memorable!
343
00:15:25,096 --> 00:15:26,496
I keep forgetting "memorable."
344
00:15:35,773 --> 00:15:36,739
Oh...
345
00:15:36,741 --> 00:15:39,809
so the "making them"
is the impossible part.
346
00:15:39,811 --> 00:15:42,512
Gah! Boiling!
347
00:15:42,514 --> 00:15:45,281
Obviously!
348
00:15:45,283 --> 00:15:48,351
Freezing!
Obviously.
349
00:15:48,353 --> 00:15:49,486
Hey, what's this?
350
00:15:50,522 --> 00:15:51,955
♪ Hallelujah! ♪
351
00:15:51,957 --> 00:15:54,290
Hallelujah!
352
00:15:58,063 --> 00:16:00,029
Hank, what's taking so long?
353
00:16:00,031 --> 00:16:01,865
I'm still at the flamingo place.
354
00:16:01,867 --> 00:16:03,227
How many do you think
I should get?
355
00:16:03,251 --> 00:16:05,502
Just get whatever you can
and boot it back here.
356
00:16:05,504 --> 00:16:09,205
- The party's starting.
- Gimme 25 of the pink ones.
357
00:16:09,207 --> 00:16:11,207
I told you,
they're not for sale.
358
00:16:11,209 --> 00:16:14,277
Come on, some of them
are one-legged.
359
00:16:14,679 --> 00:16:16,646
For you, my love.
360
00:16:16,648 --> 00:16:18,481
I saw these flowers
and thought of you.
361
00:16:18,483 --> 00:16:20,550
Yeah. I wonder why.
362
00:16:20,552 --> 00:16:22,986
Are you selling these to Foo Mart?
363
00:16:24,455 --> 00:16:26,456
- Aah!
- What are you doing?
364
00:16:26,458 --> 00:16:27,924
You scared the hell
out of me!
365
00:16:27,926 --> 00:16:29,792
I'm giving you
a shoulder massage.
366
00:16:29,794 --> 00:16:32,295
You're giving me
a heart attack!
367
00:16:32,297 --> 00:16:34,764
Surprise!
Made ya dinner.
368
00:16:34,766 --> 00:16:36,924
Chicken a la Barbecue sauce.
369
00:16:36,959 --> 00:16:38,835
- Bonjour.
- Why are you making dinner?
370
00:16:38,837 --> 00:16:40,403
We're eating
at Karen's birthday party.
371
00:16:40,405 --> 00:16:44,374
Judas Priest, there's no gift
that'll make you happy.
372
00:16:44,376 --> 00:16:46,776
Just go to the damn party
by yourself, then!
373
00:16:46,778 --> 00:16:49,913
Really?
A night away from you?
374
00:16:49,915 --> 00:16:53,316
Oh, Oscar, that's so thoughtful.
375
00:16:55,553 --> 00:16:58,721
Ha! Nailed it.
Easiest gift ever.
376
00:16:58,723 --> 00:17:01,424
I'm a hell of a husband.
377
00:17:03,228 --> 00:17:05,828
Ah, it looks like
we got it all done!
378
00:17:05,830 --> 00:17:09,399
Yep, I sure did.
No small feat.
379
00:17:09,401 --> 00:17:13,670
- Uh, don't you mean "we"?
- Fine. No wee feat.
380
00:17:15,740 --> 00:17:17,206
We've got everything.
381
00:17:17,208 --> 00:17:19,676
Karen's favourite music,
Karen's favourite dessert,
382
00:17:19,678 --> 00:17:22,512
- Karen's favourite people...
- Where's Karen?
383
00:17:22,514 --> 00:17:24,414
Oh, jeez.
384
00:17:29,287 --> 00:17:31,328
Supposed to be
my day off.
385
00:17:31,363 --> 00:17:33,022
Hardest day of work
in my life.
386
00:17:33,024 --> 00:17:35,258
Get me to this party.
I need a drink.
387
00:17:35,260 --> 00:17:36,826
You sure you don't
wanna go freshen up?
388
00:17:36,828 --> 00:17:38,981
You look a little...
389
00:17:39,763 --> 00:17:41,264
Yeah, let's get you a drink.
390
00:17:44,234 --> 00:17:47,370
All right, main course,
what'd you make?
391
00:17:47,372 --> 00:17:50,773
My specialty.
Ta-dah!
392
00:17:50,775 --> 00:17:54,611
- Peanut butter sandwiches?
- And jam!
393
00:17:54,613 --> 00:17:58,181
That's not special. Davis
said "make something special."
394
00:17:58,183 --> 00:18:00,149
That's why I cut them
on an angle.
395
00:18:00,151 --> 00:18:01,317
Ugh! This isn't a dinner!
396
00:18:01,319 --> 00:18:04,153
This is a kid's lunch circa 1952.
397
00:18:04,155 --> 00:18:05,788
Are you calling me
a bad mother?
398
00:18:05,790 --> 00:18:09,659
- No, I'm calling you a bad cook.
- How about I call you an ambulance?
399
00:18:09,661 --> 00:18:11,728
There's nothing like a party
400
00:18:11,730 --> 00:18:14,897
to soothe the nerves
after a hard day.
401
00:18:19,037 --> 00:18:21,804
Yes, this is very relaxing.
402
00:18:21,806 --> 00:18:26,109
- You said you'd help me!
- I came up with the rat story!
403
00:18:26,111 --> 00:18:28,911
Well, at least I made
Karen's favourite dessert,
404
00:18:28,913 --> 00:18:33,149
- macaroons!
- Oh, no, I'm allergic to coconut.
405
00:18:33,151 --> 00:18:35,372
My favourite dessert is macarons.
406
00:18:35,407 --> 00:18:37,954
That's what I said, only
not with the goofy accent.
407
00:18:37,956 --> 00:18:40,790
- Nice work, Ina Garten.
- Oh, bite my biscuit!
408
00:18:40,792 --> 00:18:42,892
Hey, hey, it's still a fun party.
409
00:18:42,894 --> 00:18:45,928
There's music, balloons,
drinks, a goose.
410
00:18:45,930 --> 00:18:48,431
Whoa, wait,
why is there a goose?
411
00:18:48,433 --> 00:18:49,699
Oh, no...
412
00:18:52,103 --> 00:18:54,937
- What the hell, Hank?
- You said get whatever,
413
00:18:54,939 --> 00:18:57,040
and they're real
fussy-butts at the zoo.
414
00:18:57,042 --> 00:18:59,308
Think of them
as Canadian flamingoes.
415
00:18:59,310 --> 00:19:02,545
You know I meant plastic
flamingoes, right?
416
00:19:02,547 --> 00:19:04,981
Oh...
Well, that makes more sense.
417
00:19:04,983 --> 00:19:09,085
Davis, about this $500 ticket...
418
00:19:10,922 --> 00:19:13,990
The food!
Now there's no dinner.
419
00:19:13,992 --> 00:19:16,926
A-ha!
So you admit it's a dinner.
420
00:19:16,928 --> 00:19:19,328
Oh, Brent, thank god
you made perogies,
421
00:19:19,330 --> 00:19:21,931
- and there's enough for everyone.
- Everyone?
422
00:19:21,933 --> 00:19:24,133
This is more of
a single-serving situation.
423
00:19:24,135 --> 00:19:26,102
I don't know if...
424
00:19:26,104 --> 00:19:28,137
Well, well, well,
425
00:19:28,139 --> 00:19:31,441
it turns out that making
a whole dinner is...
426
00:19:33,877 --> 00:19:36,479
How does that feel, you old...
427
00:19:36,481 --> 00:19:37,847
Oh!
428
00:19:43,187 --> 00:19:45,955
I'm going to the bar.
429
00:19:47,291 --> 00:19:49,025
Run for your lives!
430
00:19:51,595 --> 00:19:53,229
Classic.
431
00:20:02,878 --> 00:20:05,712
Oh, check it out!
I already got 200 more likes
432
00:20:05,714 --> 00:20:08,448
than Denise's dumb
Parthenon Party. See?
433
00:20:08,450 --> 00:20:12,018
Yup, I'll admit it took
a lot of work for me to plan.
434
00:20:12,020 --> 00:20:14,888
- You planned a wild goose attack?
- Well, I planned the geese.
435
00:20:14,890 --> 00:20:17,891
- The attack was icing on the cake.
- I'm sorry.
436
00:20:17,893 --> 00:20:21,461
I just wanted it to be a special,
once-in-a-lifetime thing.
437
00:20:21,463 --> 00:20:25,398
Trust me, it was.
No one will ever forget it.
438
00:20:25,400 --> 00:20:27,567
- Especially Helen.
- You wanna go to war?
439
00:20:27,569 --> 00:20:29,169
There's going to be
some scarring.
440
00:20:29,171 --> 00:20:31,805
Best birthday ever.
Thanks, Davis.
441
00:20:31,807 --> 00:20:33,039
Cheers.
442
00:20:33,041 --> 00:20:33,824
Oh, and hey, thanks
443
00:20:33,825 --> 00:20:36,376
- for covering for me at Corner Gas.
- Sure.
444
00:20:36,544 --> 00:20:38,064
By the way,
I didn't lock up the store,
445
00:20:38,088 --> 00:20:40,013
- since I don't have keys.
- Ah, no biggie.
446
00:20:40,015 --> 00:20:42,015
Dog River's
full of good people.
447
00:20:42,017 --> 00:20:44,517
Sorry, I didn't bring in
the brick delivery.
448
00:20:44,519 --> 00:20:46,152
You left the bricks outside?!
449
00:20:48,056 --> 00:20:49,456
What are you
doing here, Oscar?
450
00:20:49,458 --> 00:20:51,925
Did you pump the water
out of the basement?
451
00:20:51,927 --> 00:20:54,060
I opened up a window.
It'll dry out.
452
00:20:54,062 --> 00:20:57,030
By the time we get home,
no more problem.
453
00:21:06,825 --> 00:21:08,158
♪ I don't know ♪
454
00:21:08,160 --> 00:21:10,860
♪ The same things
you don't know ♪
455
00:21:14,298 --> 00:21:15,999
♪ I don't know ♪
456
00:21:16,001 --> 00:21:19,169
♪ I just... don't know ♪
457
00:21:21,606 --> 00:21:23,740
♪ Ooh ♪
458
00:21:23,742 --> 00:21:27,577
- ♪ It's a great big place ♪
- ♪ Ooh ♪
459
00:21:27,579 --> 00:21:31,214
- ♪ Full of nothin' but space ♪
- ♪ Ooh ♪
460
00:21:31,216 --> 00:21:34,985
- ♪ And it's my happy place ♪
- ♪ I don't know ♪
461
00:21:36,019 --> 00:21:39,843
sync & correction by f1nc0
~ Addic7ed.com ~
35519
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
