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1
00:00:00,333 --> 00:00:02,383
(upbeat music)
2
00:00:04,959 --> 00:00:06,669
Dude, neither one of these is marked.
3
00:00:06,750 --> 00:00:08,290
Which one's the cheeseburger?
4
00:00:10,250 --> 00:00:13,000
Mmm, this one's cheeseburger,
5
00:00:13,083 --> 00:00:15,213
This one's hamburger.
6
00:00:15,291 --> 00:00:17,381
Oh no, wait. Maybe...
7
00:00:17,458 --> 00:00:18,958
- This one's cheeseburger.
- Dude!
8
00:00:19,041 --> 00:00:20,421
Hey, give me those!
9
00:00:20,500 --> 00:00:22,130
(groaning)
10
00:00:22,208 --> 00:00:23,078
My tooth!
11
00:00:23,166 --> 00:00:24,626
I bit the bone.
12
00:00:24,709 --> 00:00:25,999
There's no bones in a hamburger.
13
00:00:26,083 --> 00:00:27,583
It must have been the cheeseburger.
14
00:00:28,250 --> 00:00:29,420
It really hurts.
15
00:00:29,500 --> 00:00:30,830
You should go see the dentist.
16
00:00:30,917 --> 00:00:33,207
The demonic drill-wielding monster
17
00:00:33,291 --> 00:00:35,791
who steals your teeth
to appease the fairy gods?
18
00:00:35,875 --> 00:00:37,665
No way, Jose!
19
00:00:37,750 --> 00:00:39,500
I love going to see my dentist.
20
00:00:39,583 --> 00:00:41,293
He's got this really
great assistant Holly.
21
00:00:41,375 --> 00:00:43,075
She's always like, "Hey, Rudy."
22
00:00:43,166 --> 00:00:45,126
And I’m like, "Haw-ro."
23
00:00:45,208 --> 00:00:46,708
And she's like, "Good to see you."
24
00:00:46,792 --> 00:00:49,172
And I’m like, "Hawrr..."
25
00:00:49,542 --> 00:00:52,172
It is really tough to talk with all the
dental equipment in your mouth.
26
00:00:52,250 --> 00:00:54,290
It doesn't have anything
to do with the dental equipment.
27
00:00:54,375 --> 00:00:55,875
Look how hot she is.
28
00:00:56,417 --> 00:00:58,997
Both: Haw-ro.
29
00:01:00,041 --> 00:01:01,211
Come on, Jack.
30
00:01:01,291 --> 00:01:03,381
You don't need to find a team.
We're your team.
31
00:01:03,458 --> 00:01:04,328
Guys, the commando battle
32
00:01:04,417 --> 00:01:06,877
is the most elite paintball tournament
in the country.
33
00:01:06,959 --> 00:01:07,959
I really want to win,
34
00:01:08,041 --> 00:01:10,421
but, no offense,
I’m not sure you guys are up to it.
35
00:01:10,500 --> 00:01:13,460
Seriously? I share one bathroom
with seven sisters.
36
00:01:13,542 --> 00:01:17,332
It's a war zone of curling irons,
hairnets and zit cream.
37
00:01:17,875 --> 00:01:19,705
And then there's all their stuff.
38
00:01:20,250 --> 00:01:21,630
This is serious, guys.
39
00:01:21,709 --> 00:01:23,539
The team from the Southold
Military Academy
40
00:01:23,625 --> 00:01:24,995
has won four straight years.
41
00:01:25,083 --> 00:01:27,293
Come on, Jack, you'll be our team leader
42
00:01:27,375 --> 00:01:29,285
- and we'll follow any order you give us.
- Yeah.
43
00:01:30,458 --> 00:01:31,628
You guys really want to do this?
44
00:01:31,709 --> 00:01:33,039
Yeah.
45
00:01:33,458 --> 00:01:35,708
Okay, fine. But from now on,
46
00:01:35,792 --> 00:01:38,542
I’m not your friend Jack.
I am sergeant Jack.
47
00:01:38,625 --> 00:01:40,375
I’m gonna spend the next
three hours teaching you
48
00:01:40,458 --> 00:01:41,918
how to fire your paintball guns.
49
00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:43,420
Aw, let's do this!
50
00:01:43,500 --> 00:01:46,210
But first I’m gonna go to the deli
and grab a little nosh.
51
00:01:46,709 --> 00:01:47,829
Milton!
52
00:01:48,667 --> 00:01:50,207
Seriously, Jack?
53
00:01:50,291 --> 00:01:51,961
Three hours?
54
00:01:52,041 --> 00:01:54,671
It's a paintball gun.
I think we all know how to fire--
55
00:01:57,917 --> 00:01:59,957
Yeah, no, three hours sounds about right.
56
00:02:00,333 --> 00:02:02,333
(theme music)
57
00:02:02,417 --> 00:02:05,247
♪ Don't you get all tough with me ♪
58
00:02:05,333 --> 00:02:09,213
♪ I'm saying won't you
Come kick it with me? ♪
59
00:02:09,291 --> 00:02:11,421
♪ And we could have a ball
Run up the wall ♪
60
00:02:11,500 --> 00:02:13,250
♪ That's just how we do ♪
61
00:02:13,291 --> 00:02:15,581
♪ And no matter how much
I chop and punch ♪
62
00:02:15,667 --> 00:02:18,457
♪ It's not as cool
As kickin' it with you ♪
63
00:02:18,542 --> 00:02:20,832
♪ Here we go, let's start the party ♪
64
00:02:20,917 --> 00:02:22,377
♪ Chop it up like it's karate ♪
65
00:02:22,458 --> 00:02:23,748
♪ Everybody ♪
66
00:02:23,834 --> 00:02:27,384
♪ Won't you come kick it with me? ♪
67
00:02:27,458 --> 00:02:29,628
♪ And we could have a ball
Run up the wall ♪
68
00:02:29,709 --> 00:02:31,789
♪ That's just how we do ♪
69
00:02:31,875 --> 00:02:33,665
♪ And no matter how much
I chop and punch ♪
70
00:02:33,750 --> 00:02:36,670
♪ It's not as cool
As kickin' it with you ♪
71
00:02:40,875 --> 00:02:42,875
(snoring)
72
00:02:45,291 --> 00:02:48,381
- (bugle playing "reveille")
- (screaming)
73
00:02:52,000 --> 00:02:54,000
(song continues)
74
00:02:56,083 --> 00:02:57,673
Rise and shine, ladies!
75
00:02:57,750 --> 00:02:59,290
Oh, no, there's ladies here?
76
00:03:00,834 --> 00:03:02,964
Wait a minute. I went to sleep at home.
77
00:03:03,041 --> 00:03:04,131
How did I get here?
78
00:03:04,208 --> 00:03:06,288
I had a dream I was picked up
and carried away
79
00:03:06,417 --> 00:03:07,827
by a beautiful sasquatch.
80
00:03:09,083 --> 00:03:10,633
I had the same dream.
81
00:03:11,875 --> 00:03:13,245
Both: You!
82
00:03:13,333 --> 00:03:14,753
Get in line, maggots!
83
00:03:15,917 --> 00:03:17,327
I am not your friend!
84
00:03:17,417 --> 00:03:18,957
I am your drill instructor!
85
00:03:19,041 --> 00:03:20,751
You may have entered
this boot camp as boys,
86
00:03:20,834 --> 00:03:22,964
but you are going to leave as men!
87
00:03:23,041 --> 00:03:25,001
Oh, finally, I’m going
to get some body hair.
88
00:03:25,083 --> 00:03:26,463
Jerry, do you want share a pit stick?
89
00:03:26,542 --> 00:03:27,832
I’ll give you a pit stick!
90
00:03:27,917 --> 00:03:31,127
Put on those backpacks
and move it, move it!
91
00:03:37,125 --> 00:03:39,535
(groaning)
Oh!
92
00:03:40,875 --> 00:03:42,535
Get up, maggot!
93
00:03:43,291 --> 00:03:45,001
All right, Milton, you have 20 seconds
94
00:03:45,083 --> 00:03:48,293
to get out from under your box,
run across the courtyard,
95
00:03:48,417 --> 00:03:49,747
and free Jerry
96
00:03:51,542 --> 00:03:54,462
before this automatic paintball machine
opens fire on him.
97
00:03:54,542 --> 00:03:55,582
Huh?
98
00:03:56,875 --> 00:03:59,285
I get it, testing my courage under fire.
99
00:03:59,542 --> 00:04:01,212
- Let's do this.
- Okay.
100
00:04:05,083 --> 00:04:06,503
And go!
101
00:04:06,583 --> 00:04:08,583
(watch ticking)
102
00:04:09,667 --> 00:04:11,327
Milton: It's kind of dark in here.
103
00:04:12,208 --> 00:04:14,078
Ooh, kind of hard to breathe.
104
00:04:14,625 --> 00:04:16,125
Walls are closing in!
105
00:04:16,208 --> 00:04:17,288
(yelps)
106
00:04:17,417 --> 00:04:19,577
Gotta get out of that box, soldier!
107
00:04:19,667 --> 00:04:21,287
(screams)
I’m freaking out!
108
00:04:21,375 --> 00:04:23,495
Oh, I’m freaking out, I tell ya!
109
00:04:23,583 --> 00:04:25,583
(screaming)
110
00:04:26,542 --> 00:04:28,502
All right, Milton's Gone A.W.O.L., Jerry.
111
00:04:28,583 --> 00:04:29,883
You gotta save yourself.
112
00:04:32,041 --> 00:04:33,001
Jerry?
113
00:04:33,083 --> 00:04:35,083
(watch beeps)
114
00:04:48,625 --> 00:04:51,325
Oh, what happened to you?
115
00:04:54,500 --> 00:04:56,130
♪ Kickin' it with you! ♪
116
00:04:56,208 --> 00:04:59,498
All right, Phil, Holly is a very busy
dental hygienist,
117
00:04:59,583 --> 00:05:01,833
but she's agreed to come down here
and talk to you.
118
00:05:01,917 --> 00:05:03,827
I don't want your dental witch coming.
119
00:05:03,917 --> 00:05:05,417
Once she's here, she'll show her true self
120
00:05:05,500 --> 00:05:08,420
and turn into a hideous beast
with wings and horns.
121
00:05:09,709 --> 00:05:11,499
Ooh! Here she comes.
122
00:05:11,583 --> 00:05:12,833
Be cool, man.
123
00:05:13,834 --> 00:05:14,924
Hey, Rudy.
124
00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:17,000
Haw-ro!
125
00:05:17,750 --> 00:05:19,880
So where's your friend
who's afraid of the dentist?
126
00:05:19,959 --> 00:05:21,249
Oh.
127
00:05:21,750 --> 00:05:23,960
You'll never take me, tooth demon!
128
00:05:24,041 --> 00:05:26,171
(screams)
129
00:05:26,250 --> 00:05:28,790
(glass shattering)
130
00:05:30,000 --> 00:05:32,670
I really appreciate you coming down here
131
00:05:32,750 --> 00:05:35,040
and helping calm
my friend's fear of dentists.
132
00:05:35,125 --> 00:05:36,825
Oh, I’m glad to help, Rudy.
133
00:05:38,667 --> 00:05:40,167
(moaning)
134
00:05:40,583 --> 00:05:41,753
Phil?
135
00:05:41,834 --> 00:05:43,384
Let me take a little look
inside your mouth.
136
00:05:43,458 --> 00:05:44,288
No.
137
00:05:44,375 --> 00:05:46,665
- Just a little peek.
- No!
138
00:05:46,750 --> 00:05:47,880
Just open a little bit.
139
00:05:48,834 --> 00:05:50,884
A little bit more.
140
00:05:50,959 --> 00:05:52,879
Little bit...
(gasps)
141
00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:56,540
His tooth is a black
festering mass of rot.
142
00:05:56,625 --> 00:05:59,245
I told you you needed
to make an appointment, Phil.
143
00:05:59,375 --> 00:06:01,625
And Holly's office
is one of the best in the world.
144
00:06:01,709 --> 00:06:03,919
That's right. In fact, world-famous doctor
145
00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:05,630
Bjorn Bjorklund is joining our staff.
146
00:06:05,709 --> 00:06:07,539
And he's coming all the way from Sweden.
147
00:06:08,291 --> 00:06:11,331
But I don't want to go to the dentist.
148
00:06:12,125 --> 00:06:12,955
Aww.
149
00:06:13,375 --> 00:06:14,665
I know how to handle this.
150
00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:19,580
Phil, if you go to the dentist...
151
00:06:19,667 --> 00:06:20,787
(blows air)
152
00:06:22,583 --> 00:06:24,833
...you get to go home
153
00:06:25,417 --> 00:06:27,127
- with this!
- (shouts)
154
00:06:27,208 --> 00:06:28,288
She is a demon!
155
00:06:28,375 --> 00:06:31,165
She used her powers to turn that balloon
into a weiner dog!
156
00:06:31,250 --> 00:06:33,380
(screaming)
157
00:06:37,291 --> 00:06:39,291
(upbeat music)
158
00:06:42,166 --> 00:06:45,376
Hey, what are you doing here?
It's not even 6:00 a.m. yet.
159
00:06:45,458 --> 00:06:47,128
Oh, to help us beat Southold,
160
00:06:47,208 --> 00:06:49,458
I’ve been reading this book
on military tactics.
161
00:06:49,542 --> 00:06:52,132
I even practiced a sneak attack on my mom.
162
00:06:53,125 --> 00:06:55,665
Now Jerry and I are working a camouflage.
163
00:07:01,458 --> 00:07:02,828
Look around, Jack.
164
00:07:05,041 --> 00:07:06,711
I’m totally hidden.
165
00:07:06,792 --> 00:07:09,462
See if you can find me. Oooh!
166
00:07:11,291 --> 00:07:12,921
By the way, this is Jerry talking.
167
00:07:13,291 --> 00:07:14,751
Jerry Martinez.
168
00:07:15,959 --> 00:07:18,579
Hmm, I wonder where he could be.
169
00:07:18,667 --> 00:07:22,037
You know, it just makes me so mad
that I can't find him.
170
00:07:22,125 --> 00:07:23,995
Makes me just want to punch something...
171
00:07:24,417 --> 00:07:25,577
Like this dummy.
172
00:07:25,667 --> 00:07:27,787
(high voice)
I would go with the punching bag.
173
00:07:27,875 --> 00:07:31,205
No, no, no. It's definitely
this ugly dummy.
174
00:07:31,291 --> 00:07:32,921
(grunting)
175
00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:35,670
(whining)
I think he knows I’m here.
176
00:07:36,000 --> 00:07:37,920
(grunts)
177
00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:40,000
Jack, we got here early
because we want you to know
178
00:07:40,083 --> 00:07:41,673
that we're taking this seriously.
179
00:07:41,750 --> 00:07:43,380
We're not going to let you down.
180
00:07:44,583 --> 00:07:46,793
You guys, I, I appreciate that,
181
00:07:46,875 --> 00:07:49,075
but it's not necessary.
182
00:07:49,166 --> 00:07:52,206
- I’m not your leader anymore.
- Both: What?
183
00:07:53,250 --> 00:07:56,500
This is lieutenant Donovan
from the Southold Military Academy.
184
00:07:56,583 --> 00:07:57,423
Soldier.
185
00:07:57,500 --> 00:07:58,830
Weakling.
186
00:07:59,875 --> 00:08:01,035
Weirdo.
187
00:08:02,792 --> 00:08:04,462
They asked me to join their squad.
188
00:08:04,542 --> 00:08:05,962
Oh, really?
189
00:08:06,417 --> 00:08:09,877
I bet a big tough guy like you
is going to cry like a baby
190
00:08:09,959 --> 00:08:11,499
when he tells you no!
191
00:08:11,917 --> 00:08:13,827
I told him yes, Jerry.
192
00:08:13,917 --> 00:08:15,497
(squealing)
Oh, he quit our team!
193
00:08:15,583 --> 00:08:18,293
Milton, he quit our team!
194
00:08:21,709 --> 00:08:24,289
I’m sorry, but you two weren't ready
for the commando battle.
195
00:08:24,375 --> 00:08:25,955
I never would have had a chance
with you guys.
196
00:08:26,250 --> 00:08:27,290
This is better for everyone.
197
00:08:27,417 --> 00:08:29,167
How is this better for us?
198
00:08:30,250 --> 00:08:31,630
You're right.
199
00:08:31,917 --> 00:08:33,037
It's better for me.
200
00:08:33,667 --> 00:08:35,497
Tac-ops starts at 0600!
201
00:08:35,583 --> 00:08:38,923
Then we'll hit the D-fac,
-divide our M.R.E.
-S and get some r&r!
202
00:08:39,500 --> 00:08:40,920
I’m sorry, what?
203
00:08:41,208 --> 00:08:42,538
Practice starts in 20 minutes,
204
00:08:42,625 --> 00:08:44,995
then we'll go to Phil's, split a pizza,
205
00:08:45,083 --> 00:08:47,383
and, you know, hang.
206
00:08:47,458 --> 00:08:49,038
- Why didn't you just say that?
- I did.
207
00:08:49,125 --> 00:08:49,955
No, you didn't.
208
00:08:50,875 --> 00:08:52,915
- Now fall in, soldier!
- What?
209
00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:54,710
(sighs)
Let's just go.
210
00:08:54,792 --> 00:08:56,332
(groans)
211
00:08:56,583 --> 00:08:58,583
(upbeat music)
212
00:08:59,125 --> 00:09:01,625
♪ Hey, come on! ♪
213
00:09:02,792 --> 00:09:04,832
And I just want to add a quick note.
214
00:09:05,166 --> 00:09:07,576
Hey, Holly, sorry about yesterday.
215
00:09:07,667 --> 00:09:09,787
Great to see you. Yours, Rudy.
216
00:09:10,375 --> 00:09:12,415
P.s., you're the light of my life
I love you, marry me.
217
00:09:12,542 --> 00:09:14,462
(laughs)
218
00:09:14,834 --> 00:09:15,924
I can't write that.
219
00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:17,170
That's crazy.
220
00:09:17,375 --> 00:09:20,785
Uh, change, "Hey, Holly" to "'Sup, girl?"
221
00:09:22,375 --> 00:09:24,285
- Hey, Rudy.
- Hey, Holly!
222
00:09:24,375 --> 00:09:26,165
I mean, 'Sup, girl?
223
00:09:28,500 --> 00:09:30,210
This is my fiancé, Bart.
224
00:09:31,041 --> 00:09:33,751
(stammering)
Bart "the bone breaker"
225
00:09:33,834 --> 00:09:35,294
Banks is your fiancé?
226
00:09:36,375 --> 00:09:39,625
He's the toughest linebacker
in pro football.
227
00:09:40,333 --> 00:09:41,923
Rudy, are you all right?
228
00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:43,540
(moaning)
229
00:09:45,375 --> 00:09:47,325
I saw your game last week, Bart.
230
00:09:47,375 --> 00:09:48,785
That was a crazy hit you made.
231
00:09:48,875 --> 00:09:50,495
Yeah, that referee had it coming.
232
00:09:50,583 --> 00:09:52,963
I didn't like the way
he was looking at my Holly.
233
00:09:54,083 --> 00:09:55,463
(laughs)
234
00:09:55,542 --> 00:09:57,792
You just, you hit him because of the way
235
00:09:57,875 --> 00:09:59,125
he was looking at your...
236
00:09:59,208 --> 00:10:00,208
(mumbles)
Her?
237
00:10:01,792 --> 00:10:03,672
Why would anyone want to look at that?
238
00:10:05,834 --> 00:10:07,504
I mean, I would, but...
239
00:10:08,500 --> 00:10:09,750
I gotta go.
240
00:10:10,083 --> 00:10:11,543
Gotta get those flowers back.
241
00:10:11,625 --> 00:10:13,995
(muttering)
Okay.
242
00:10:14,083 --> 00:10:15,963
All right, congrats again.
243
00:10:17,500 --> 00:10:19,040
I am so dead!
244
00:10:20,375 --> 00:10:22,375
(upbeat music)
245
00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:29,670
Our next team competing
in the commando battle
246
00:10:29,750 --> 00:10:31,920
is four-time defending champion
247
00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:34,290
the Southold Military Academy!
248
00:10:34,417 --> 00:10:38,747
Fall in! And hup hup hup hup!
249
00:10:38,834 --> 00:10:40,044
Company, halt!
250
00:10:40,625 --> 00:10:42,825
Hup hup!
251
00:10:43,959 --> 00:10:45,999
Present arms!
252
00:10:47,041 --> 00:10:48,251
- (cocks gun)
- Hup!
253
00:10:48,458 --> 00:10:49,288
Hup!
254
00:10:51,458 --> 00:10:53,458
Very impressive.
255
00:10:53,792 --> 00:10:55,382
Our last competitors,
256
00:10:55,458 --> 00:10:58,498
the Wasabi warriors!
257
00:10:58,583 --> 00:11:01,003
Uh, no no, ref, I’m sorry.
That's a mistake.
258
00:11:01,083 --> 00:11:02,383
That team's not competing anymore.
259
00:11:02,458 --> 00:11:03,828
Company, hut!
260
00:11:04,583 --> 00:11:08,543
♪ The champs are here so let's begin ♪
261
00:11:08,625 --> 00:11:11,125
♪ Wasabi warriors gonna win ♪
262
00:11:11,208 --> 00:11:13,288
♪ We the best and you guys ain't ♪
263
00:11:13,417 --> 00:11:15,667
♪ Better get ready to eat our paint! ♪
264
00:11:15,750 --> 00:11:17,960
♪ Boom shaka laka laka
Boom shaka laka laka ♪
265
00:11:18,041 --> 00:11:19,751
♪ Boom, shaka laka laka, boom! ♪
266
00:11:21,291 --> 00:11:23,381
(dance music playing)
267
00:11:27,500 --> 00:11:28,790
I heard you boys dropped out.
268
00:11:28,875 --> 00:11:32,665
We decided to drop back in, your honor!
269
00:11:32,750 --> 00:11:33,790
"Sir."
270
00:11:34,125 --> 00:11:35,705
Your honor, sir!
271
00:11:36,792 --> 00:11:39,752
You guys actually think you have a chance
of winning this competition?
272
00:11:39,834 --> 00:11:41,834
All: That's a fact, Jack!
273
00:11:45,625 --> 00:11:47,625
(upbeat music)
274
00:11:48,750 --> 00:11:51,080
Here we go.
We have team green, team orange,
275
00:11:51,166 --> 00:11:52,706
team yellow and team purple.
276
00:11:52,792 --> 00:11:54,502
Actually, it's more of a violet.
277
00:11:54,583 --> 00:11:57,633
It's not violet. Technically,
it's called midnight eggplant.
278
00:11:57,709 --> 00:11:59,249
What? No, it's not, this is violet.
279
00:11:59,291 --> 00:12:01,001
- Have you ever seen an eggplant?
- Yes, I have.
280
00:12:01,083 --> 00:12:02,293
It looks just like this.
281
00:12:02,417 --> 00:12:04,037
(overlapping dialogue)
282
00:12:04,125 --> 00:12:06,575
Dudes! What is wrong with you two?
283
00:12:07,291 --> 00:12:08,921
We're dusty lavender, sir.
284
00:12:09,709 --> 00:12:11,129
Okay, purple it is.
285
00:12:12,083 --> 00:12:13,293
Rules are simple.
286
00:12:13,375 --> 00:12:15,285
If you get hit with another team's paint,
you're out.
287
00:12:15,375 --> 00:12:17,415
Team with the last man standing wins.
288
00:12:17,500 --> 00:12:18,330
Any questions?
289
00:12:18,875 --> 00:12:19,745
Excuse me?
290
00:12:19,834 --> 00:12:21,924
I thought there was going
to be a pre-battle mixer?
291
00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:24,630
So I made everybody some deviled eggs!
292
00:12:24,875 --> 00:12:26,625
(buzzer sounds)
293
00:12:27,208 --> 00:12:28,498
(yelps)
294
00:12:28,583 --> 00:12:29,963
Run!
295
00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:35,920
(upbeat music)
296
00:12:48,625 --> 00:12:51,665
Great, the card's unopened.
She hasn't seen it yet.
297
00:12:53,125 --> 00:12:55,745
Susie, don't overbook
Dr. Bjorklund tomorrow.
298
00:12:56,417 --> 00:12:58,377
He's going to be tired
from his flight from Sweden.
299
00:12:58,792 --> 00:13:00,082
Whoa!
300
00:13:00,709 --> 00:13:01,629
Oh!
301
00:13:01,750 --> 00:13:03,710
(with accent)
I’m Dr. Bjorklund.
302
00:13:05,166 --> 00:13:07,416
Howdy doody to youdy, Judy.
303
00:13:07,500 --> 00:13:09,960
Oh, we weren't expecting you
till tomorrow.
304
00:13:10,458 --> 00:13:13,498
Oh, well, my cuckoo clock was fast.
305
00:13:14,125 --> 00:13:17,535
I hate it when your cuckoo
goes cuckoo, don't you too too?
306
00:13:17,625 --> 00:13:20,285
Oh, actually, it's a good thing
that you're early.
307
00:13:20,375 --> 00:13:23,205
We have a walk-in patient
who needs an immediate tooth extraction.
308
00:13:24,250 --> 00:13:26,540
(screaming)
309
00:13:27,875 --> 00:13:29,875
I can't take the pain!
310
00:13:30,208 --> 00:13:31,708
But I’m so afraid!
311
00:13:32,792 --> 00:13:35,082
Oh, this is nice for an evil death lair.
312
00:13:38,458 --> 00:13:40,038
Oh.
(laughs)
313
00:13:42,583 --> 00:13:44,503
Uh, okay.
314
00:13:44,917 --> 00:13:47,997
Looks like I have no choice
but to take a little look at your tooth.
315
00:13:48,625 --> 00:13:51,285
Um, does this one hurt?
316
00:13:52,250 --> 00:13:53,290
(moans)
317
00:13:54,417 --> 00:13:55,917
What about this one?
318
00:13:56,500 --> 00:13:57,580
(moans)
319
00:13:57,834 --> 00:13:59,134
How about...
320
00:13:59,458 --> 00:14:00,418
(screams)
321
00:14:02,458 --> 00:14:03,828
I think we found it.
322
00:14:04,875 --> 00:14:06,875
(upbeat music)
323
00:14:09,291 --> 00:14:10,671
(bullets pelting)
324
00:14:11,250 --> 00:14:13,250
(guns firing)
325
00:15:03,083 --> 00:15:05,043
Wha-- Jack just shot him.
326
00:15:05,125 --> 00:15:07,245
He looked him right in the eye
and he shot him!
327
00:15:07,333 --> 00:15:08,633
Who does that?
328
00:15:11,875 --> 00:15:13,285
I’m hyperventilating.
329
00:15:13,375 --> 00:15:15,705
I can't die now.
I’ve never even kissed a girl!
330
00:15:16,166 --> 00:15:17,786
You've never even held hands with a girl.
331
00:15:17,875 --> 00:15:19,205
You've never even talked to a girl.
332
00:15:19,291 --> 00:15:20,881
Look, I have a lot of things
to do with girls!
333
00:15:20,959 --> 00:15:23,629
Look, Jack's right, man.
We're not cut out for this.
334
00:15:23,709 --> 00:15:25,879
What are we going to do, Milton?
Didn't you learn anything
335
00:15:25,959 --> 00:15:27,959
from those battle-strategy books
you were reading?
336
00:15:28,959 --> 00:15:29,999
Yes.
337
00:15:30,875 --> 00:15:32,745
And I know exactly what we're going to do.
338
00:15:34,667 --> 00:15:36,827
I surrender. Please don't hurt me.
339
00:15:37,709 --> 00:15:39,709
(upbeat music)
340
00:15:40,834 --> 00:15:42,384
Okey dokey.
341
00:15:42,458 --> 00:15:45,578
We're going to take out that
naughty tooth lickety-split.
342
00:15:46,333 --> 00:15:48,083
Here's a syringe
filled with numbing agent.
343
00:15:48,166 --> 00:15:49,996
- Thank you very much, Holly--
- (needle piercing)
344
00:16:05,500 --> 00:16:07,710
Um, maybe you'd like to put
some cotton in his mouth
345
00:16:07,792 --> 00:16:08,922
with these tongs?
346
00:16:11,625 --> 00:16:12,955
(grunts)
347
00:16:16,959 --> 00:16:17,879
Oh.
348
00:16:21,875 --> 00:16:23,035
Suction, doctor?
349
00:16:23,125 --> 00:16:24,205
Ah.
350
00:16:31,834 --> 00:16:33,754
- (air hissing)
- (groaning)
351
00:16:35,959 --> 00:16:37,329
(panting)
352
00:16:38,166 --> 00:16:40,956
Well, now that I’ve sucked
your boogers, we can proceed.
353
00:16:41,083 --> 00:16:44,923
(needles piercing)
354
00:16:48,542 --> 00:16:50,882
That's a big old oopsy-doopsy!
355
00:16:52,125 --> 00:16:53,955
Doctor, do you need some help?
356
00:16:54,041 --> 00:16:55,381
(grunts)
357
00:16:55,959 --> 00:16:57,919
No, nothing to worry about.
358
00:16:58,000 --> 00:17:00,920
I think I was quick enough
to get it out before the numbing agent...
359
00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:03,880
(both gasping)
Rudy!
360
00:17:03,959 --> 00:17:06,169
No no, I’m Dr. Bjorklund, I...
361
00:17:06,250 --> 00:17:07,920
My mask came off, didn't it?
362
00:17:10,709 --> 00:17:12,879
Bart, what are you doing here?
363
00:17:12,959 --> 00:17:14,959
I was coming to see you
when I saw these flowers outside
364
00:17:15,041 --> 00:17:17,791
with a love letter
attached for you, from Rudy.
365
00:17:17,875 --> 00:17:19,125
Now who's Rudy?
366
00:17:19,208 --> 00:17:22,078
Oh, that's Rudy.
You met him the other day.
367
00:17:22,166 --> 00:17:24,286
Oh, I’m sorry.
368
00:17:24,375 --> 00:17:26,245
I’m really not good with names.
369
00:17:27,041 --> 00:17:28,961
Now I remember. I’m gonna crush you!
370
00:17:29,083 --> 00:17:30,673
(grunting)
371
00:17:32,375 --> 00:17:34,535
(crying)
372
00:17:36,458 --> 00:17:38,538
Now stand up and fight me like a man.
373
00:17:38,625 --> 00:17:40,495
(grunts)
374
00:17:42,083 --> 00:17:43,423
(groans)
375
00:17:45,125 --> 00:17:46,325
Oh!
376
00:17:46,917 --> 00:17:48,377
My tooth came out!
377
00:17:48,458 --> 00:17:50,748
I feel no pain! Thank you!
378
00:17:50,834 --> 00:17:53,714
Oh, you should become a dentist, Mr. Bart!
379
00:17:53,792 --> 00:17:56,082
You'd be much better at that
than at football!
380
00:17:56,166 --> 00:17:57,916
You are awful!
381
00:17:58,000 --> 00:17:59,500
- (grunts)
- Oh!
382
00:17:59,583 --> 00:18:00,463
(thwacks)
383
00:18:01,500 --> 00:18:03,540
(upbeat music)
384
00:18:04,709 --> 00:18:06,249
Jack: Throw down your weapon.
385
00:18:07,041 --> 00:18:08,501
Where's the rest of your team?
386
00:18:08,583 --> 00:18:10,133
Jerry panicked and climbed out the window
387
00:18:10,208 --> 00:18:12,628
of the men's room.
It's just me and Sydney.
388
00:18:13,500 --> 00:18:14,830
Sydney, now!
389
00:18:41,250 --> 00:18:43,420
Surrender, Jack! It's over.
390
00:18:43,500 --> 00:18:45,420
He's right.
We've got you right where we...
391
00:18:46,667 --> 00:18:47,577
Ow!
392
00:18:47,667 --> 00:18:49,457
Not cool, dude. I’m not wearing a cup.
393
00:18:51,041 --> 00:18:52,961
It's just the two of us, Jack.
394
00:18:53,041 --> 00:18:54,711
Get ready to eat paint.
395
00:18:54,792 --> 00:18:56,252
(grunts)
396
00:19:00,125 --> 00:19:01,665
(gun clicking)
397
00:19:07,208 --> 00:19:09,248
Sounds like you're out of paint.
398
00:19:10,291 --> 00:19:11,751
You're smart, Milton.
399
00:19:12,000 --> 00:19:13,670
But you didn't think of everything.
400
00:19:19,834 --> 00:19:22,334
Actually, I did.
401
00:19:24,041 --> 00:19:25,541
Purple paint?
402
00:19:26,250 --> 00:19:28,540
(low voice)
That's not purple, punk.
403
00:19:28,625 --> 00:19:29,995
(grunts)
404
00:19:34,166 --> 00:19:35,916
That's dusty lavender.
405
00:19:37,750 --> 00:19:39,290
(buzzer sounds)
406
00:19:39,709 --> 00:19:41,629
- We did it!
- Whoo!
407
00:19:41,709 --> 00:19:44,749
The winner of this year's
commando battle is...
408
00:19:44,834 --> 00:19:47,174
The Wasabi warriors!
409
00:19:47,250 --> 00:19:50,040
(all applauding)
410
00:19:52,625 --> 00:19:55,995
Wow. You guys
really pulled this thing off.
411
00:19:56,083 --> 00:19:58,463
I, I’m sorry I underestimated you.
412
00:19:58,917 --> 00:20:00,747
Yes, you did.
413
00:20:00,875 --> 00:20:02,535
I never should have bailed on you.
414
00:20:03,125 --> 00:20:05,745
Permission to be
on your team next year, sir?
415
00:20:05,834 --> 00:20:07,884
Permission granted.
416
00:20:09,417 --> 00:20:11,127
Company fall in!
417
00:20:12,208 --> 00:20:14,378
♪ It looked like
We couldn't make the cut! ♪
418
00:20:14,375 --> 00:20:16,415
♪ It looked like we couldn't
Make the cut! ♪
419
00:20:16,500 --> 00:20:18,210
♪ Then team Wasabi kicked some butt!
420
00:20:18,291 --> 00:20:19,921
♪ Then team Wasabi kicked some butt! ♪
421
00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:21,420
- Whoo!
- All: ♪ Boom shaka laka laka! ♪
422
00:20:21,500 --> 00:20:22,710
♪ Boom shaka laka laka! ♪
423
00:20:22,792 --> 00:20:24,132
♪ Boom shaka laka laka... ♪
424
00:20:26,417 --> 00:20:27,627
Boom!
425
00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:33,040
(upbeat music)
426
00:20:36,208 --> 00:20:38,208
(bugle playing "reveille")
427
00:20:43,792 --> 00:20:46,002
Rise and shine, goldilocks!
428
00:20:46,083 --> 00:20:48,503
Only 364 more days
429
00:20:48,583 --> 00:20:50,543
till next year's competition!
430
00:20:50,875 --> 00:20:52,665
Uh, how did I get here?
431
00:20:52,750 --> 00:20:54,750
I had a dream that I was
picked up in a shopping cart
432
00:20:54,834 --> 00:20:57,384
by a baboon and a freckled stork!
433
00:21:02,125 --> 00:21:05,745
Get down and give us 50, maggot!
434
00:21:08,542 --> 00:21:10,212
I’m not giving you 50.
435
00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:12,790
I’m not giving you one.
436
00:21:13,375 --> 00:21:15,125
Here's what's gonna happen.
437
00:21:15,208 --> 00:21:17,288
I am getting in this shopping cart
438
00:21:17,375 --> 00:21:20,665
and you two are going to take me home,
and I’m going back to bed!
439
00:21:20,750 --> 00:21:22,040
Is that clear?
440
00:21:23,208 --> 00:21:24,668
Both: Very clear!
441
00:21:27,250 --> 00:21:28,500
Maggot.
442
00:21:32,709 --> 00:21:34,749
(closing theme music)
443
00:21:56,834 --> 00:21:57,884
Man: Poor soul.
444
00:21:57,959 --> 00:21:58,829
(dog snarls, barks)
445
00:22:01,750 --> 00:22:02,710
Boy: Yes!
30965
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