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>> TOSH.0 FEATURES VIDEOS FROM
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THE INTERNET.
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ENJOY.
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[ APPLAUSE ]
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>> NOTHING GETS A CROWD GOING
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LIKE THROWING A GIRL IN A
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WHEELCHAIR OFF A BRIDGE.
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WELCOME TO TOSH.0.
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THIS IS OUR LAST EPISODE BEFORE
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WE GO ON SPRING BREAK.
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TO MARK THE OCCASION WE ARE NOT
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DOING ANYTHING SPECIAL.
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AND NO THESE AREN'T LONG JOHNS.
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THE HIGHEST OF FASHION.
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I TELL YOU WHAT WE DID WITH THE
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MONEY FROM THE MEMORABILIA DUMP.
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I SHOVED STUFF IN MY BOY'S MOUTH
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AND PUT THE FUTURE OF THE SHOW
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IN YOUR INCOMPETENT HANDS.
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NOW LET'S SEE IF SHE FEELS
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ANYTHING THIS TIME.
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I BET SHE GOT TO SKIP TO THE
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FRONT OF THE LINE.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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IT DOESN'T SEEM AS EXTREME
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WITHOUT THE RISK OF PARALYSIS.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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I KNOW SHE'S CRAPPING HER BAG
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RIGHT NOW.
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BOUGHT THAT BUNGEE GROUPON
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BEFORE THE CAR ACCIDENT.
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DID YOU SEE THE NEW TRAILER FOR
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THE AVENGERS MOVIE?
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**
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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AH, THEY'RE STILL TRYING TO WORK
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OUT THE KINKS.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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MY SPIDEY SENSE TELLS ME HE'S
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SLINGING MORE THAN WEBS AT THIS
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THROWDOWN.
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I HOPE THE DAILY BUGLE DOESN'T
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GET ANY SHOTS OF THIS.
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THE CRIME FIGHTERS WERE PROBABLY
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IN THE AREA ANYWAYS.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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HERE'S A SHOT.
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AN ADULT THAT STILL HANGS OUT IN
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SKATE PARKS IS A BAD PARENT.
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SHH.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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QUIT CRYING OR YOUR MOM WILL
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MAKE YOU PLAY SOCCER FOR THE
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REST OF YOUR LIFE.
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SKATEBOARDING ISN'T A CRIME BUT
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KILLING TODDLERS IS.
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WAY TO MAKE THE MOST OF YOUR ONE
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UNSUPERVISED WHACKED MONTH.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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DON'T BE SURPRISED IF CHILD
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SERVICES IS NEXT TO DROP IN.
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HEY, SUPERMARKET, QUIT HIDING
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YOUR BATHROOMS.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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AS JOYED THAT VIDEO STARTED OUT
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SO SEXY AND THEN GOT EVEN
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HOTTER.
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AT LEAST FIND THE COMMON SENSE
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TO POO IN THE TOILET PAPER
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AISLE.
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THANKS AVTIVIA!
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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SURE YOU PAY EXTRA TO WHOLE
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FOODS BUT DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU
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NEVER SEE THERE?
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HUMAN BLEEP IN FROVENT PICKLES.
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THIS NEXT VIDEO WILL NOT HELP
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THIS GIRL'S SELF-ESTEEM ISSUES.
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DO THEY NOT HAVE SOFTBALL IN HER
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TOWN?
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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SPRING BOARDS CAN ONLY DO SO
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MUCH.
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THEY'RE NOT MAGIC.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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SHE SHOULD USE A CANNON.
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A REALLY BIG, POWERFUL CANNON.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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SHE DESERVES POINTS FOR FITTING
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INTO THAT LEOTARD.
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>> OH NATION OF INGLE WOOD.
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ALWAYS UP TO NO GOOD.
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WHAT'S NEXT?
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SPOIL ALERT.
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NO KID HAS EVER WON ANYTHING
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WITH A T-SHIRT TUCKED INTO HIS
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PANTS.
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I'M NO FIGHT EXPERT BUT I THINK
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WE HAVE A MISMATCH.
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LET'S WATCH THE CLASSIC BATTLE
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OF DAVID VERSUS D'ANDRE IN THIS
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WEEK'S BREAKDOWN.
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FUJITS
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FUJITSSU IS A GREAT WAY TO BUILD
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CHARACTER.
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IF THE WHITE DON'T WIN, WE ALL
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JUMP IN.
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NO?
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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YOU GUYS DIDN'T LEARN THAT HATE
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CHANT AS A KID?
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THANKS, MOM.
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FIRST FIGHT EVER SHOULDN'T BE
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AGAINST BILLY BLANKS JR.
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I WOULD BNT SURPRISED IF THAT
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TINY MARINE HAD PUBES ALREADY.
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NOTHING MAKES YOU LOOK WHITER
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THAN SCREWING UP A HANDSHAKE
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WITH A BLACK DUDE.
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LET THE BOYS BE BOYS?
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APPARENTLY SEAN PAYTON IS STILL
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COACHING DURING HIS SUSPENSION.
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LOOK AT THE HOUSE CHORE THAT
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DEFENDS AGAINST THAT MOVE,
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MIAGI.
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GOT THE WIND KNOCKED OUT OF HIM
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ALONG WITH ANY DREAMS OF MAKING
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HIS FATHER PROUD.
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THAT IS THE FACE OF A KID THAT
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WILL BE DEVOTING THE REST OF HIS
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LIFE TO SCI-FI NOVELS.
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OR MAYBE THE KLAN.
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GOOD NEWS.
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YOU'RE STILL GETTING A
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PARTICIPATION RIBBON F IT WILL
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FIT OVER YOUR NECK BRACE.
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I'M JUST GLAD IF THERE EVER IS A
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RACE WAR, IT WON'T LAST LONG.
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I'M TAPPING OUT IMMEDIATELY.
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AND FOR THAT, WE THANK YOU.
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BE RIGHT BACK WITH THE RESULTS
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OF THE MEMORABILIA DUMP.
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BUT FIRST, NEW YORK CITY, THE
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GREATEST CITY IN THE WORLD.
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THE ENERGY, HUH?
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NO.
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IT'S THE PEOPLE THAT MAKE NEW
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YORK CITY SUCH A GREAT PLACE.
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>> I BET YOU BEAT UP LEMONS,
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TOO.
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YOU'RE A BATTERER.
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>> YOU'RE A LIAR.
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>> YOU'RE A BATTERER.
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YOU'RE A BATTERER.
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AH!
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AH!
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>> YOU WANT TO HIT ME?
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>> GO AHEAD, HIT ME!
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HIT ME THE WAY YOU HIT YOUR
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WIFE!
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>> DANIEL, WHAT DO YOU PLAN ON
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DOING WITH THIS STUFF?
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>> I DON'T KNOW.ñ
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Pá
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DO MOST
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DTQ)
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SHOWS DO?
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PUT IT IN STORAGE?
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>> BLEEP THAT.
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>> PUT IT ON EBAY.
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MAKE A KILLING.
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>> I JUST ADDED IT UP.
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THE AUCTION MADE US $24,199.
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[ APPLAUSE ]
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>> WHAT CHARITY IS IT GOING TO
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GO TO?
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>> THE CHARITY OF OUR WALLET.
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HOLD ON.
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WAIT WAIT WAIT.
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WHAT'S COOLER THAN $24,199?
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$48,000 AND SOME CHANGE.
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LET'S TAKE TO IT VEGAS.
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ONE HAND OF BLACK JACK.
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DOUBLE OR NOTHING.
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>> VEGAS!
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VEGAS!
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VEGAS!
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>> THE SAFEST INVESTMENT IN THIS
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ECONOMY IS THE BLACK JACK TABLE.
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YOU DON'T HAVE TO HAVE THE GOOD
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KIND OF AUTISM TO WIN ONE HAND.
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WE HELD OUR MEMORABILIA DUMP FOR
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A GOOD CAUSE.
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WE RAISED ALMOST $25,000.
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BUT THAT AMOUNT OF MONEY ISN'T
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GONNA MAKE A DENT IN ANY REAL
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CHARITY.
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THAT'S WHY I DECIDED TO TAKE IT
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TO LAS VEGAS.
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I LOVE VEGAS.
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THAT'S NOT EXACTLY TRUE.
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I HATE IT.
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IT WOULD BE A GREAT TOWN IF NONE
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OF YOU GREEDY PEOPLE EVER WENT
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THERE.
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THE ONLY PEOPLE MORE DESPERATE
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FOR MONEY ARE IN THE CAST OF
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AMERICAN REUNION.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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FIVE YEARS AGO LAS VEGAS WAS THE
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FASTEST GROWING CITY IN THE
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COUNTRY.
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NOW IT'S BACK TO BEING AMERICA'S
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ASHTRAY.
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BACKED WITH CHAIN SMOKING
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GRANDMAS AND FAT GUYS IN NFL
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JERSEYS THAT ALL CAME HERE ON A
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SOUTHWEST FLIGHT FROM HOUSTON.
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THEY SAY THE REAL VEGAS IS OFF
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THE STRIP.
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I HAVE BEEN OFF THE STRIP.
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IT'S A FLAT BORING SUBURB IN A
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120 DEGREE DESERT.
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THANKS BUT I'LL STICK TO THE
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FANTASY LAND OF LAS VEGAS
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BOULEVARD.
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THERE'S SOMETHING FOR EVERYBODY.
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FAKE PARIS, FAKE ITALY, FAKE
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TITS, REAL DEPRESSION.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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YOU WAIT IN LINE ALL NIGHT TO
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GET INTO CLUBS LIKE TRYST JUST
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TO LISTEN TO A DEEJAY WHO GIVES
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A BLEEP.
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THEY SHOULD GIVE THE CLUBS
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HONEST NAMES LIKE MOUTH HERPES.
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NEVER VACATION IN A TOWN WHERE
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THE PORN INDUSTRY HOLDS AN AWARD
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SHOW.
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I DON'T WANT TO SLEEP IN THE
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WINNER OF BEST NEW THINGS SHOVED
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IN HIS BLEEP.
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THERE'S NOT ENOUGH BLEACH TO
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SANITIZE THAT BATHROOM.
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VEGAS IS THE ONLY PLACE YOU CAN
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STILL CATCH POLIO.
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MY SYSTEM IS, I PERFORM IN SOLD
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OUT VENUES.
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BUT YOU WILL LOSE A LOT.
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ONLY THING IS FOR ENOUGH MONEY,
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EVERY GIRL'S A PROSTITUTE.
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THAT BEING SAID, LAS VEGAS IS
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STILL THE BEST PLACE TO GO IF
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YOU WANT TO DOUBLE $25,000.
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SO I TOOK ALL THE MONEY YOU
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THOUGHT YOU WERE GIVING TO
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CHARITY AND TOOK MY STAFF TO
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VEGAS TO PLAY ONE HAND OF BLACK
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JACK.
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SHUFFLE UP AND DEAL.
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IS THIS SEAT TAKEN?
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>> YOU WANT TO COME IN RIGHT
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NOW?
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>> YES.
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I WOULD LIKE TO COME IN RIGHT
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NOW.
267
00:10:52,733 --> 00:10:59,073
>> WOW.
268
00:10:59,067 --> 00:10:59,697
YOU WANT THAT?
269
00:10:59,700 --> 00:11:04,770
>> CHIP.
270
00:11:04,767 --> 00:11:05,897
>> $2500.
271
00:11:05,900 --> 00:11:11,770
$2500.
272
00:11:11,767 --> 00:11:17,197
12,500 OKAY.
273
00:11:17,200 --> 00:11:17,530
$24,199.
274
00:11:17,533 --> 00:11:17,973
>> PERFECT.
275
00:11:17,967 --> 00:11:18,697
>> GOOD LUCK.
276
00:11:18,700 --> 00:11:20,700
>> WHAT'S THE TABLE MIN?
277
00:11:20,700 --> 00:11:21,070
>> $5.
278
00:11:21,067 --> 00:11:28,127
>> OKAY.
279
00:11:28,133 --> 00:11:28,603
>> THIS YOURS?
280
00:11:28,600 --> 00:11:33,730
ALL RIGHT.
281
00:11:33,733 --> 00:11:34,573
>> OH.
282
00:11:34,567 --> 00:11:39,767
THAT'S NOT GOOD AT ALL.
283
00:11:39,767 --> 00:11:40,127
>> OKAY.
284
00:11:40,133 --> 00:11:47,203
OH.
285
00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:49,230
>> ALL RIGHT.
286
00:11:49,233 --> 00:11:52,573
OKAY.
287
00:11:52,567 --> 00:11:57,097
ALL RIGHT.
288
00:11:57,100 --> 00:11:57,870
SOFT 17.
289
00:11:57,867 --> 00:11:58,967
YOU WANT TO HIT?
290
00:11:58,967 --> 00:11:59,627
>> YES, PLEASE.
291
00:11:59,633 --> 00:12:04,403
>> OKAY.
292
00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:04,970
>> 15.
293
00:12:04,967 --> 00:12:07,967
>> I'M GONNA TAKE A HIT.
294
00:12:07,967 --> 00:12:10,467
>> NOW NO GOOD.
295
00:12:10,467 --> 00:12:20,367
ALL RIGHT.
296
00:12:22,300 --> 00:12:28,930
>> HIT.
297
00:12:33,633 --> 00:12:36,673
[ LAUGHTER ]
298
00:12:36,667 --> 00:12:39,697
>> I AM SORRY.
299
00:12:39,700 --> 00:12:42,200
>> COCKTAILS.
300
00:12:42,200 --> 00:12:42,870
[ APPLAUSE ]
301
00:12:42,867 --> 00:12:44,667
>> IF I HAD WON, I WOULD HAVE
302
00:12:44,667 --> 00:12:45,727
BUILT A SCHOOL FOR THESE NEEDY
303
00:12:45,733 --> 00:12:46,273
CHILDREN.
304
00:12:46,267 --> 00:12:48,767
[ LAUGHTER ]
305
00:12:48,767 --> 00:12:49,897
SORRY, KIDS.
306
00:12:49,900 --> 00:12:51,970
LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO
307
00:12:51,967 --> 00:12:52,927
GET STREET SMART.
308
00:12:52,933 --> 00:12:53,803
OR DIRT ROAD SMART.
309
00:12:53,800 --> 00:12:54,970
WHATEVER YOU HAVE OVER THERE.
310
00:12:54,967 --> 00:12:56,167
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
311
00:12:56,167 --> 00:12:58,197
BUT FIRST, IF SNOW BOARDS WANT
312
00:12:58,200 --> 00:13:03,400
WAR, SKIERS WILL GIVE THEM WAR.
313
00:13:15,267 --> 00:13:17,967
>> HOLY BLEEP.
314
00:13:17,967 --> 00:13:18,627
HOLY BLEEP.
315
00:13:31,867 --> 00:13:38,367
>> OH!
316
00:13:40,467 --> 00:13:42,627
>> YOU PEOPLE DISGUST ME.
317
00:13:42,633 --> 00:13:43,073
[ LAUGHTER ]
318
00:13:43,067 --> 00:13:44,367
ONE OF THE BEST THINGS ABOUT
319
00:13:44,367 --> 00:13:45,767
HAVING A STAFF IS MAKING THEM DO
320
00:13:45,767 --> 00:13:47,167
WHATEVER THE HELL I WANT.
321
00:13:47,167 --> 00:13:49,297
MY FAVORITE EMPLOYEE TO MESS IS
322
00:13:49,300 --> 00:13:49,630
ANDREW.
323
00:13:49,633 --> 00:13:51,733
I HAVE BEEN FORCING HIM TO EAT
324
00:13:51,733 --> 00:13:52,933
UNPLEASANT STUFF ON CAMERA ALL
325
00:13:52,933 --> 00:13:53,503
SEASON LONG.
326
00:13:53,500 --> 00:13:55,400
>> I'M ABOUT TO EAT ONE AND A
327
00:13:55,400 --> 00:13:57,130
HALF.
328
00:13:57,133 --> 00:14:00,533
OH.
329
00:14:00,533 --> 00:14:06,333
THIS IS WARM BAKING SODA.
330
00:14:10,833 --> 00:14:14,803
>> YOU'RE IN THE HOME STRETCH.
331
00:14:14,800 --> 00:14:17,300
>> HAZELNUT FLAVOR.
332
00:14:17,300 --> 00:14:28,970
>> STUFFED JERKY.
333
00:14:28,967 --> 00:14:30,397
>> A FIG NUT BREAD?
334
00:14:30,400 --> 00:14:37,430
>> NO, NO.
335
00:14:37,433 --> 00:14:39,533
>> THOSE ARE TWO THINGS PEOPLE
336
00:14:39,533 --> 00:14:46,073
DON'T LIKE.
337
00:14:46,067 --> 00:14:47,967
>> CHICKEN HEAD.
338
00:14:47,967 --> 00:14:50,927
>> OH, OH.
339
00:14:50,933 --> 00:14:57,173
>> DOESN'T SMELL GOOD.
340
00:14:57,167 --> 00:15:06,467
>> ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
341
00:15:06,467 --> 00:15:08,197
>> THIS IS THE WORST THING I
342
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:19,070
HAVE EVER EATEN.
343
00:15:19,067 --> 00:15:21,067
>> AH.
344
00:15:21,067 --> 00:15:29,097
THIS IS BURNING MY EYES.
345
00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:39,700
>> THAT'S ALL FAT.
346
00:15:46,067 --> 00:15:47,797
[ LAUGHTER ]
347
00:15:47,800 --> 00:15:51,830
>> OH, GOD.
348
00:16:00,367 --> 00:16:05,967
>> OH, OH.
349
00:16:05,967 --> 00:16:12,467
>> WHAT WAS THAT?
350
00:16:12,467 --> 00:16:15,527
>> YOUR FINAL THING YOU HAVE TO
351
00:16:15,533 --> 00:16:17,833
DRINK IS THE ONE THING NBC'S
352
00:16:17,833 --> 00:16:20,373
FEAR FACTOR WOULD NOT LET THEM
353
00:16:20,367 --> 00:16:21,067
DO.
354
00:16:21,067 --> 00:16:25,067
THAT IS DRINK HORSE BLEEP.
355
00:16:25,067 --> 00:16:26,427
DRINK IT STRAIGHT.
356
00:16:26,433 --> 00:16:29,473
SO WE DO HAVE ICE TEA.
357
00:16:29,467 --> 00:16:31,297
WE HAVE HALF ICE TEA, HALF HORSE
358
00:16:31,300 --> 00:16:39,700
BLEEP.
359
00:16:39,700 --> 00:16:40,800
>> HALF.
360
00:16:40,800 --> 00:16:50,970
>> THAT'S GOOD.
361
00:16:57,533 --> 00:17:12,103
[ LAUGHTER ]
362
00:17:12,100 --> 00:17:14,400
>> I PROMISED MYSELF I WOULDN'T
363
00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:17,200
DO IT.
364
00:17:17,200 --> 00:17:19,070
>> IF ANDREW LOOKED FAMILIAR
365
00:17:19,067 --> 00:17:20,367
HE'S THE ONE I TOLD YOU ABOUT
366
00:17:20,367 --> 00:17:21,797
WHO WAS RAPED AS A BOY ON A
367
00:17:21,800 --> 00:17:22,370
CRUISE SHIP.
368
00:17:22,367 --> 00:17:26,597
NOW I REMEMBER HIM.
369
00:17:26,600 --> 00:17:28,530
LUCKY FOR US COMEDY CENTRAL IS
370
00:17:28,533 --> 00:17:29,473
ASLEEP AT THE WHEEL.
371
00:17:29,467 --> 00:17:31,197
JUST SO YOU KNOW, HE WAS BEING A
372
00:17:31,200 --> 00:17:33,600
REAL PUSSY ABOUT CHUGGING THAT.
373
00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:34,870
I HAD TO DO SOMETHING I WASN'T
374
00:17:34,867 --> 00:17:36,467
PROUD OF.
375
00:17:36,467 --> 00:17:37,327
DO IT.
376
00:17:37,333 --> 00:17:38,903
I UNDERSTAND A HOT DOG.
377
00:17:38,900 --> 00:17:39,570
THAT I DON'T WANT TO DO.
378
00:17:39,567 --> 00:17:41,627
OKAY.
379
00:17:41,633 --> 00:17:42,073
DRINK IT.
380
00:17:42,067 --> 00:17:46,297
LET'S GO.
381
00:17:46,300 --> 00:17:48,330
IF YOU TAKE A SIP, CHUG THE
382
00:17:48,333 --> 00:17:48,633
REST.
383
00:17:48,633 --> 00:17:49,973
>> CHUG THE REST.
384
00:17:49,967 --> 00:17:56,967
>> OH, GOD.
385
00:17:56,967 --> 00:18:00,067
>> GOOD?
386
00:18:00,067 --> 00:18:02,727
>> THAT WAS DISGUSTING.
387
00:18:02,733 --> 00:18:04,133
I HATE TEA.
388
00:18:04,133 --> 00:18:05,633
[ LAUGHTER ]
389
00:18:05,633 --> 00:18:09,803
>> HALF LEMONADE, THAT WOULD
390
00:18:09,800 --> 00:18:11,270
HAVE BEEN BEEN REFRESHING.
391
00:18:11,267 --> 00:18:13,167
DON'T FORGET TO LOOK AT OUR
392
00:18:13,167 --> 00:18:15,127
BLOG, CHANCE FOR OUR VIEWER
393
00:18:15,133 --> 00:18:15,473
VIDEO.
394
00:18:15,467 --> 00:18:16,867
THIS WINNER COMES TO US FROM THE
395
00:18:16,867 --> 00:18:20,367
SECOND CITY.
396
00:18:20,367 --> 00:18:21,427
WELCOME EVERYONE.
397
00:18:21,433 --> 00:18:23,073
AS YOU KNOW TODAY IS OUR ANNUAL
398
00:18:23,067 --> 00:18:25,467
COMPANY OUTING.
399
00:18:25,467 --> 00:18:26,427
CHRISTOPHER'S GAY.
400
00:18:26,433 --> 00:18:27,803
>> WHAT?
401
00:18:27,800 --> 00:18:28,670
>> WHAT?
402
00:18:28,667 --> 00:18:30,427
[ LAUGHTER ]
403
00:18:30,433 --> 00:18:33,903
>> SEEMS LIKE A SMALL COMPANY.
404
00:18:33,900 --> 00:18:35,100
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE
405
00:18:35,100 --> 00:18:35,600
PRETEND TIME.
406
00:18:47,133 --> 00:18:48,873
>> WELCOME BACK TO MAGIC
407
00:18:48,867 --> 00:18:51,467
JOHNSON'S TOSH.0.
408
00:18:51,467 --> 00:18:51,867
[ LAUGHTER ]
409
00:18:51,867 --> 00:18:53,227
ONE LAST LOOK AT THIS HIGH
410
00:18:53,233 --> 00:18:53,603
FASHION.
411
00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:55,100
WHO KNOWS WHAT I'LL BE SPORTING
412
00:18:55,100 --> 00:18:55,770
THIS SUMMER.
413
00:18:55,767 --> 00:18:59,197
NEXT WEEK I'LL BE IN ONE OF YOUR
414
00:18:59,200 --> 00:19:01,270
CRAPPY TOWNS LIVE, FOLLOW ME ON
415
00:19:01,267 --> 00:19:02,497
TWITTER OR BLOG.
416
00:19:02,500 --> 00:19:04,270
WE'LL CONTINUE TO BE UPDATED
417
00:19:04,267 --> 00:19:04,967
DURING OUR BREAK.
418
00:19:04,967 --> 00:19:06,067
OUR STORE WILL NOT.
419
00:19:06,067 --> 00:19:08,467
BEFORE WE GO I'M EXCITED TO
420
00:19:08,467 --> 00:19:09,927
INTRODUCE TO YOU A NEW SEGMENT
421
00:19:09,933 --> 00:19:11,633
CALLED LIGHTLY TOUCHING WILL'S
422
00:19:11,633 --> 00:19:12,873
STOMACHS WHILE THEY'RE SITTING
423
00:19:12,867 --> 00:19:13,227
DOWN.
424
00:19:13,233 --> 00:19:13,673
[ LAUGHTER ]
425
00:19:13,667 --> 00:19:14,867
IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK.
426
00:19:14,867 --> 00:19:16,297
THIS IS WHERE YOU SNEAK UP
427
00:19:16,300 --> 00:19:17,530
BEHIND WOMEN WHO ARE SITTING
428
00:19:17,533 --> 00:19:21,073
DOWN AND LIGHTLY PUT YOUR HAN ON
429
00:19:21,067 --> 00:19:21,797
THEIR STOMACH.
430
00:19:21,800 --> 00:19:23,800
MAKE SURE SHE'S AWARE THAT YOU
431
00:19:23,800 --> 00:19:27,330
ARE IN FACT FEELING A ROLL.
432
00:19:27,333 --> 00:19:34,803
[ LAUGHTER ]
433
00:19:49,600 --> 00:19:50,730
>> OKAY, GUYS.
434
00:19:50,733 --> 00:19:53,733
DURING OUR BREAK I NEEDED YOU TO
435
00:19:53,733 --> 00:19:55,273
FILM YOURSELF LIGHTLY TOUCHING
436
00:19:55,267 --> 00:19:56,397
WOMEN'S STOMACH.
437
00:19:56,400 --> 00:19:57,200
BE CAREFUL.
438
00:19:57,200 --> 00:19:58,400
THEY LIKE TO PRETEND THEY DON'T
439
00:19:58,400 --> 00:19:58,970
LOVE IT.
440
00:19:58,967 --> 00:20:00,797
WHEN A TV SHOW IS ABOUT TO BE
441
00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:01,830
CANCELLED FANS SOMETIMES START
442
00:20:01,833 --> 00:20:03,273
CAMPAIGN TO SAVE IT BY SENDING
443
00:20:03,267 --> 00:20:05,367
STUPID STUFF INTO THE NETWORK.
444
00:20:05,367 --> 00:20:07,497
THEY SENT IN PENIS, ON REAPER
445
00:20:07,500 --> 00:20:10,870
THEY SENT IN SOCKS, SOME SENT IN
446
00:20:10,867 --> 00:20:11,867
SKITTLES.
447
00:20:11,867 --> 00:20:12,797
UNFORTUNATELY THERE'S NO DANGER
448
00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:14,300
OF THAT HAPPENING TO THIS SHOW.
449
00:20:14,300 --> 00:20:16,200
JUST TAKING A BREAK FOR A FEW
450
00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:16,500
WEEKS.
451
00:20:16,500 --> 00:20:18,200
I WANT MY VACATION TO BE LONGER.
452
00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:19,370
MUCH LONGER.
453
00:20:19,367 --> 00:20:22,527
I'M STARTING A CAMPAIGN AGAINST
454
00:20:22,533 --> 00:20:23,233
TOSH.0 CANCEL.
455
00:20:23,233 --> 00:20:25,233
HERE'S COMEDY CENTRAL'S ADDRESS.
456
00:20:25,233 --> 00:20:27,003
I WANT YOU TO START MAILING THEM
457
00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:28,530
CHEESE.
458
00:20:28,533 --> 00:20:30,773
YEAH, CHEESE.
459
00:20:30,767 --> 00:20:31,967
ANY KIND YOU WANT.
460
00:20:31,967 --> 00:20:34,497
SEND THEM A WHEEL, A WEDGE, A
461
00:20:34,500 --> 00:20:34,800
CUBE.
462
00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:36,070
THE SMELLIER THE BETTER.
463
00:20:36,067 --> 00:20:37,297
IF I DON'T COME BACK IT'S
464
00:20:37,300 --> 00:20:38,930
BECAUSE YOU DID A GOOD JOB.
465
00:20:38,933 --> 00:20:39,733
GOOD NIGHT.
466
00:20:39,733 --> 00:20:40,003
OH.
467
00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:41,900
AND A SPECIAL THANKS TO ALL THE
468
00:20:41,900 --> 00:20:43,230
DESIGNERS WHOSE OUTFITS I MADE
469
00:20:43,233 --> 00:20:44,203
LOOK SO AMAZING.
470
00:20:44,200 --> 00:20:45,270
[ LAUGHTER ]
471
00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:54,800
[ APPLAUSE ]
472
00:20:56,633 --> 00:21:04,603
[ APPLAUSE ]
473
00:21:04,600 --> 00:21:06,830
>> SOME OF THIS IS JUST USELESS
474
00:21:06,833 --> 00:21:07,133
JUNK.
475
00:21:07,133 --> 00:21:09,473
OUR FANS ARE USELESS JUNK.
476
00:21:09,467 --> 00:21:11,727
THEY'LL PAY TOP DOLLAR FOR THIS
477
00:21:11,733 --> 00:21:12,073
CRAP.
478
00:21:12,067 --> 00:21:12,627
>> WHAT DO YOU WANT?
28735
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