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1
00:00:03,754 --> 00:00:06,344
(upbeat music)
2
00:01:08,604 --> 00:01:11,944
(vacuum motor humming)
3
00:02:02,185 --> 00:02:04,845
(phone ringing)
4
00:02:12,844 --> 00:02:16,514
(speaking foreign language)
5
00:02:31,709 --> 00:02:32,629
- Hey!
- Eh.
6
00:02:32,626 --> 00:02:34,816
- Fuckin' hell Thomas why'd
you leave that fucking hoover
7
00:02:34,820 --> 00:02:35,700
there for?
8
00:02:35,703 --> 00:02:39,373
(speaking foreign language)
9
00:02:40,863 --> 00:02:42,703
- Yeah yeah yeah yeah.
10
00:02:47,819 --> 00:02:48,649
Enough.
11
00:03:03,457 --> 00:03:06,267
No I did not hit her.
12
00:03:06,265 --> 00:03:08,155
I did not hit her,
13
00:03:08,157 --> 00:03:08,987
I did not.
14
00:03:10,280 --> 00:03:11,110
Oh hi Tom.
15
00:03:14,220 --> 00:03:16,320
Are you gonna do any fucking work old boy?
16
00:03:29,620 --> 00:03:31,170
The birds,
17
00:03:31,170 --> 00:03:32,830
the bees,
18
00:03:32,830 --> 00:03:35,300
it brings 'em to her knees.
19
00:03:35,300 --> 00:03:36,630
To suck on my D.
20
00:03:37,910 --> 00:03:38,740
The grass.
21
00:03:41,650 --> 00:03:43,370
Oy oy, what have we here?
22
00:03:43,370 --> 00:03:45,990
Some youth must have
dropped their spud gun.
23
00:03:45,990 --> 00:03:47,830
Crikey it feels real.
24
00:03:47,830 --> 00:03:49,160
Fucking looks real too.
25
00:03:49,160 --> 00:03:50,500
Don't know that shit.
26
00:04:04,990 --> 00:04:06,960
Oh a gardener loves a bit of bush.
27
00:04:07,990 --> 00:04:08,890
Dirty bush.
28
00:04:08,890 --> 00:04:10,480
Clean bush.
29
00:04:10,480 --> 00:04:13,030
Love the bush, get right into the bush.
30
00:04:13,025 --> 00:04:14,585
(laughing)
31
00:04:14,593 --> 00:04:15,503
I crack myself up.
32
00:04:17,210 --> 00:04:18,340
Stray bit of bush.
33
00:04:19,738 --> 00:04:22,738
(suspenseful music)
34
00:04:29,650 --> 00:04:31,890
Gardner do this, gardener do that.
35
00:04:31,890 --> 00:04:33,600
Clean this, clean that.
36
00:04:33,600 --> 00:04:35,450
Sweep up this.
37
00:04:35,448 --> 00:04:37,388
Fuckin' had enough of it.
38
00:04:37,393 --> 00:04:38,753
Where's that chef?
39
00:04:40,317 --> 00:04:42,457
I'm fuckin' hungry, want some food.
40
00:04:42,460 --> 00:04:43,980
Sandwich maybe.
41
00:04:43,975 --> 00:04:45,145
I got the baps.
42
00:04:45,147 --> 00:04:47,397
(laughing)
43
00:04:48,503 --> 00:04:51,113
(speaking foreign language)
44
00:04:51,110 --> 00:04:53,010
What are you talking about Thomas?
45
00:04:53,012 --> 00:04:53,942
Eh?
46
00:04:53,940 --> 00:04:56,080
It's a Casio, I know yeah.
47
00:04:56,080 --> 00:04:56,930
Get off.
48
00:04:56,927 --> 00:04:57,757
Hey.
49
00:04:57,760 --> 00:04:58,980
He actually chopped it off.
50
00:04:58,976 --> 00:05:00,116
(laughing)
51
00:05:00,119 --> 00:05:00,949
Hey!
52
00:05:00,952 --> 00:05:03,842
It was just a tickle, more
like a scratch actually.
53
00:05:03,840 --> 00:05:07,240
Come on big boy, get around
here and show me what you got.
54
00:05:07,243 --> 00:05:08,083
(laughing)
55
00:05:08,076 --> 00:05:09,126
You pussy.
56
00:05:09,134 --> 00:05:10,904
(laughing)
57
00:05:10,903 --> 00:05:12,833
Come on big boy, I'm waiting for ya.
58
00:05:12,830 --> 00:05:14,380
I ain't got all day.
59
00:05:14,376 --> 00:05:15,206
Huh?
60
00:05:15,209 --> 00:05:16,039
Hello?
61
00:05:16,042 --> 00:05:16,882
Hello?
62
00:05:19,468 --> 00:05:20,758
Here he is.
63
00:05:20,757 --> 00:05:21,667
Get in here.
64
00:05:21,670 --> 00:05:22,580
Yeah fucking come on.
65
00:05:22,580 --> 00:05:23,950
I can take some more.
66
00:05:23,950 --> 00:05:25,570
Yeah come around here.
67
00:05:25,570 --> 00:05:27,700
Nice and close, nice and close.
68
00:05:27,700 --> 00:05:29,460
Go on then, chop it off, I dare you.
69
00:05:29,463 --> 00:05:31,713
(snapping)
70
00:05:32,574 --> 00:05:35,654
Oy, oy is that all you've got?
71
00:05:35,647 --> 00:05:37,507
Hey you're tearing me apart.
72
00:05:37,514 --> 00:05:39,434
(laughing)
73
00:05:39,430 --> 00:05:40,920
Oy come on pussy-o.
74
00:05:40,920 --> 00:05:42,290
Come back around here.
75
00:05:42,289 --> 00:05:44,679
I've still got a couple
of limbs you can lop off.
76
00:05:44,676 --> 00:05:46,916
(laughing)
77
00:05:46,920 --> 00:05:49,460
Come on big boy, let me see ya.
78
00:05:51,760 --> 00:05:53,460
You're tearing me apart Tom.
79
00:05:57,832 --> 00:05:59,242
Ah fucking hell.
80
00:05:59,243 --> 00:06:01,963
Hey, it's just a fucking flesh wound.
81
00:06:01,955 --> 00:06:03,505
A fucking tickle.
82
00:06:03,507 --> 00:06:05,027
Come on big boy,
83
00:06:05,026 --> 00:06:06,966
yeah fuck him.
84
00:06:06,971 --> 00:06:10,301
Fucking kill, you nasty fucking bastard.
85
00:06:11,199 --> 00:06:12,279
It's nothing.
86
00:06:13,463 --> 00:06:15,713
Maybe tickles a little bit.
87
00:06:17,487 --> 00:06:20,237
(dramatic music)
88
00:06:49,919 --> 00:06:52,499
(dog growling)
89
00:06:53,690 --> 00:06:56,690
(suspenseful music)
90
00:07:07,152 --> 00:07:09,492
(screaming)
91
00:07:23,284 --> 00:07:25,124
Smells like that bird.
92
00:07:26,630 --> 00:07:27,460
Hi Thomas.
93
00:07:27,463 --> 00:07:31,383
Hey I was only joking about
the magic horse, I'm sorry.
94
00:07:46,820 --> 00:07:49,660
Oh god it's stuck in the
crows there's so much in here.
95
00:07:49,660 --> 00:07:51,430
It's gonna come out in a minute.
96
00:07:51,432 --> 00:07:52,802
Come on.
97
00:07:52,796 --> 00:07:55,296
(siren wails)
98
00:07:59,700 --> 00:08:02,610
Oh yeah, just a little bit more.
99
00:08:02,613 --> 00:08:04,953
Come on you're nearly there.
100
00:08:58,290 --> 00:09:00,470
Oy, Thomas, have you seen the,
101
00:09:00,470 --> 00:09:02,470
well hello there little
fella what have we here?
102
00:09:02,468 --> 00:09:04,938
(speaking foreign language)
103
00:09:04,937 --> 00:09:08,167
He's some sort of lady bird or something?
104
00:09:08,174 --> 00:09:11,704
Some sort of magical shagger
or something, oh get right in
105
00:09:11,696 --> 00:09:13,106
there son.
106
00:09:13,107 --> 00:09:15,627
Hey, hey, on your head.
107
00:09:15,626 --> 00:09:16,826
There you go see you later.
108
00:09:16,829 --> 00:09:19,079
(laughing)
109
00:09:21,728 --> 00:09:22,558
- Hello?
110
00:09:25,814 --> 00:09:26,654
Hello.
111
00:09:26,647 --> 00:09:28,557
Oh hello, are you open?
112
00:09:33,323 --> 00:09:34,423
Hello.
113
00:09:34,420 --> 00:09:35,250
Oh thank you.
114
00:09:38,130 --> 00:09:41,440
I have a job interview with, hang on,
115
00:09:42,620 --> 00:09:43,450
George?
116
00:09:43,453 --> 00:09:44,293
Is George here?
117
00:09:45,441 --> 00:09:47,731
Oh you're George, oh wonderful.
118
00:09:47,730 --> 00:09:48,560
Thank you.
119
00:09:52,160 --> 00:09:52,990
Thank you.
120
00:09:54,850 --> 00:09:55,740
Nice to meet you.
121
00:09:58,619 --> 00:10:01,999
Yeah I'm Lazo, I'm here
about the waitress position.
122
00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:04,000
You told me to come in today for a chat.
123
00:10:05,840 --> 00:10:06,670
Is that okay?
124
00:10:10,340 --> 00:10:12,570
Oh, oh not for me thank you.
125
00:10:12,570 --> 00:10:15,100
I've just got back from a
lovely trip in the French Alps,
126
00:10:15,100 --> 00:10:17,000
couldn't possibly sip on anymore wine.
127
00:10:18,240 --> 00:10:19,840
Did you ask me if I wanted wine?
128
00:10:21,070 --> 00:10:23,290
Sorry I can't remember.
129
00:10:23,290 --> 00:10:24,940
Could I just have a water please?
130
00:10:26,160 --> 00:10:28,090
You do do water, right?
131
00:10:28,094 --> 00:10:28,934
- Yeah.
132
00:10:28,927 --> 00:10:30,357
- Okay can I have a water please?
133
00:10:31,690 --> 00:10:34,640
Sorry I'm nervous, I've
not had a job interview
134
00:10:34,640 --> 00:10:36,320
for awhile now.
135
00:10:36,320 --> 00:10:37,520
'Cause I've been skiing.
136
00:10:38,890 --> 00:10:39,720
Relax.
137
00:10:41,460 --> 00:10:44,560
I'm really good at carrying food.
138
00:10:44,560 --> 00:10:49,560
I'm organised, I'm reliable,
I'm friendly, I'm funny.
139
00:10:50,880 --> 00:10:52,620
Customers will like me.
140
00:10:53,780 --> 00:10:56,710
I'm really quick at
serving drinks and food.
141
00:10:57,960 --> 00:11:01,360
I can waitress, I've got
waitressing experience.
142
00:11:03,480 --> 00:11:04,620
People will like me.
143
00:11:07,690 --> 00:11:10,860
I'm really good and
quick at carrying food.
144
00:11:10,860 --> 00:11:12,620
I can carry three plates at a time.
145
00:11:14,410 --> 00:11:16,070
I've got bar experience as well.
146
00:11:19,406 --> 00:11:21,586
I'm chatty,
147
00:11:21,590 --> 00:11:22,450
I'm bubbly,
148
00:11:23,298 --> 00:11:24,538
I turn up on time.
149
00:11:25,474 --> 00:11:26,574
I can do extra shifts.
150
00:11:32,834 --> 00:11:36,624
I'm organised, reliable,
friendly, chatty, funny,
151
00:11:38,482 --> 00:11:39,322
and.
152
00:11:54,570 --> 00:11:56,940
- In what moon did thou fall
153
00:11:58,050 --> 00:12:02,230
and grace me with here
ever growing bright light,
154
00:12:03,160 --> 00:12:03,990
height,
155
00:12:05,390 --> 00:12:06,220
sight,
156
00:12:07,300 --> 00:12:08,130
might,
157
00:12:09,993 --> 00:12:10,833
kite?
158
00:12:17,328 --> 00:12:19,648
Without grace,
159
00:12:19,650 --> 00:12:21,790
there cannot be mace,
160
00:12:21,790 --> 00:12:22,850
haste,
161
00:12:23,900 --> 00:12:25,770
or wall paper paste.
162
00:12:28,600 --> 00:12:31,130
You feel me through the walls,
163
00:12:31,130 --> 00:12:33,200
the stalls,
164
00:12:33,200 --> 00:12:34,280
the pigeon does
165
00:12:34,280 --> 00:12:35,530
nothing but calls.
166
00:12:36,825 --> 00:12:40,075
(mocking pigeon calls)
167
00:12:43,490 --> 00:12:45,260
Are you the grass,
168
00:12:45,260 --> 00:12:47,430
the fallen soldiers,
169
00:12:47,430 --> 00:12:48,560
the bench?
170
00:12:49,440 --> 00:12:50,980
Or are you looking to dance?
171
00:12:56,910 --> 00:12:57,740
- What?
172
00:13:02,040 --> 00:13:03,510
- Does my poetry not make you think,
173
00:13:03,507 --> 00:13:08,507
"Wow, this guys both handsome,
good looking and beautiful."?
174
00:13:08,650 --> 00:13:09,550
- Both?
175
00:13:09,550 --> 00:13:10,780
You said three things.
176
00:13:12,600 --> 00:13:13,430
- And modest?
177
00:13:14,630 --> 00:13:16,290
- I'm just waiting for George.
178
00:13:18,810 --> 00:13:20,010
- Yeah I'm the gardener.
179
00:13:21,010 --> 00:13:22,060
- Well done.
180
00:13:22,060 --> 00:13:23,540
- Thanks, yeah yeah yeah.
181
00:13:23,540 --> 00:13:25,840
I used to be the cleaner
but now I'm the gardener.
182
00:13:25,840 --> 00:13:27,800
I think in the next couple
years, you know what I've been
183
00:13:27,795 --> 00:13:28,625
offered?
184
00:13:30,890 --> 00:13:32,700
- Head chef?
185
00:13:33,707 --> 00:13:34,537
- No.
186
00:13:34,540 --> 00:13:35,990
No no no no no.
187
00:13:35,990 --> 00:13:37,380
Way better than that.
188
00:13:37,381 --> 00:13:40,021
Glass bottle recycler.
189
00:13:41,220 --> 00:13:42,050
Magical.
190
00:13:43,420 --> 00:13:46,260
- So George, he's in charge right?
191
00:13:46,260 --> 00:13:48,510
- Oh no, no no no no no.
192
00:13:48,510 --> 00:13:50,960
George is sleeping, he
had a late one last night.
193
00:13:52,175 --> 00:13:53,515
- Are you George?
194
00:13:53,517 --> 00:13:54,977
(laughing)
195
00:13:54,980 --> 00:13:56,180
- Do I look like George?
196
00:13:58,530 --> 00:13:59,360
- No.
197
00:14:00,440 --> 00:14:03,880
- Well I could be if you wanted me to be.
198
00:14:05,579 --> 00:14:06,709
Oh look out.
199
00:14:06,711 --> 00:14:09,901
(shouting in foreign language)
200
00:14:09,896 --> 00:14:11,126
Hey alright, alright.
201
00:14:11,132 --> 00:14:12,752
Oh whoa, whoa, whoa.
202
00:14:12,753 --> 00:14:15,073
Hey off me all's fair
game in love and warfare.
203
00:14:15,073 --> 00:14:16,893
Come on big boy.
204
00:14:16,889 --> 00:14:17,719
Come on.
205
00:14:20,150 --> 00:14:22,010
If you want some I'm gonna give it to ya.
206
00:14:22,007 --> 00:14:23,367
Are you ready for it?
207
00:14:23,370 --> 00:14:24,590
I'll fucking chop you up.
208
00:14:24,586 --> 00:14:26,976
(yelling)
209
00:14:26,977 --> 00:14:30,317
The chick was begging for it,
she wanted me to fucking smack
210
00:14:30,318 --> 00:14:31,408
her in the toilet.
211
00:14:31,407 --> 00:14:33,847
She said "Oh give it to me Gardner.".
212
00:14:34,900 --> 00:14:37,400
See you later mate, you joke.
213
00:15:04,733 --> 00:15:06,483
- Cala-maka-dula-doo.
214
00:15:08,813 --> 00:15:12,483
(speaking foreign language)
215
00:19:51,219 --> 00:19:52,799
- Dushka-Talamanka.
216
00:19:58,614 --> 00:20:00,784
(beeping)
217
00:20:13,086 --> 00:20:13,916
Dushka
218
00:20:14,782 --> 00:20:15,622
Talamanka.
219
00:20:59,496 --> 00:21:01,076
- Dushka-Talamanka.
220
00:21:03,819 --> 00:21:04,899
Selfish sins.
221
00:21:09,952 --> 00:21:10,792
No!
222
00:21:18,045 --> 00:21:20,205
(beeping)
223
00:21:38,556 --> 00:21:41,456
(explosion)
224
00:21:41,457 --> 00:21:43,617
(panting)
225
00:21:50,123 --> 00:21:52,343
- Aye chubbly order, what are you up to?
226
00:21:52,344 --> 00:21:53,184
What are you looking at?
227
00:21:53,177 --> 00:21:54,307
The birds or something?
228
00:21:54,312 --> 00:21:57,292
(laughing)
229
00:21:57,291 --> 00:21:58,871
- Dushka-Talamanka.
230
00:21:59,715 --> 00:22:00,735
- Yeah yeah yeah whatever eh?
231
00:22:00,740 --> 00:22:03,010
Look I'm gonna tell you about this bird.
232
00:22:03,010 --> 00:22:05,480
She was like, oh she was well
up for it and then the next
233
00:22:05,480 --> 00:22:07,890
minute I know she reckons I've
smashed her up or something.
234
00:22:07,885 --> 00:22:09,235
It's awful.
235
00:22:09,241 --> 00:22:10,181
After you big guy.
236
00:22:10,175 --> 00:22:12,755
(upbeat music)
237
00:22:15,836 --> 00:22:17,936
- Good thing I've got my arm around you.
238
00:22:17,935 --> 00:22:21,725
Okay alright, let me
see that magical horse.
239
00:22:21,726 --> 00:22:24,656
- It's a fucking unicorn
you fucking idiot.
240
00:22:24,658 --> 00:22:27,168
- Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah.
241
00:22:27,172 --> 00:22:29,842
(upbeat music)
15078
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