All language subtitles for Last.Man.Standing.S09E09.WEBRip.x264-ION10

Hey.

How do I look?

Devastatingly beautiful,
as usual, honey.

That's sweet.
Uh, now try it

while you're
actually looking at me.

Oh.
Wow, look at you.

What, are you hiking down
to Whole Foods?

Have you forgotten
why we bought all this stuff?

It's for our trip to Peru.

Right.

You know,
I'm running out of time.

I don't think
I can get there today.

-We are gonna go,
I promise, I promise.
-Eh, no, no.

You keep saying that
and we keep not going.

Don't you remember during
the pandemic, we talked about

all the things we were gonna do
as soon as it was possible?

I thought we were talking
about touching our faces.

All right, you know what,
rather than joke,

if you don't want to go,
why don't you just tell me.

I want to go, honey.
We're gonna do that,

but this pandemic has changed
the sales landscape at work,

and I'm doing my best
to rebalance it.

Yeah, but does
the sales landscape have

misty mountaintops

and breathtaking Inca ruins?

Hmm?

Do you know
why the Inca had ruins?

'Cause they never rebalanced
their sales landscape.

You know what,
I am getting the feeling

that we are never gonna go.

My dream is disappearing,

-like the morning mist
over Cuzco.
-Honey...

Honey, honey,
we're going to go, I promise.

I'm looking forward to it,
just like you.

But just because
the pandemic is over

doesn't mean I don't have to
deal with the fallout at work.

Well, just promise me you're
not gonna be one of those guys

-who dies at the office.
-Oh, come on.

Why do you say stuff like that?

I exercise, eat right.
My life couldn't be happier.

I've got every si...

All right, what happens when
a car gets out of alignment?

Uh, loose steering control,
uneven wear on your tire treads,

lower gas mileage.

Hi, I'm Mike Baxter's daughter.

Thank you, Kris.

And you're right.
The car runs inefficiently.

Just like our store.

Sometimes it needs
to be realigned.

When I'm out of alignment,
I visit Katerina.

Please tell me
she's your chiropractor.

Yes, and my astrologer,
too, yeah.

Doesn't have a license
for either, but...

They say time is money,
but in our case, space is money.

Ooh. Uh, even outer space?

No.

Listen, Chuck saves us a lot
of money in security equipment

using just
this square footage he has

in this tiny office
here in the bullpen.

I know where this is headed.

I'm gonna get a door.

No, you're not.

Listen, you take up
just as much space as you need.

You're very efficient.

You're perfect.

I'd rather have a door.

Wouldn't we all
rather have a door, huh?

'Cause presently we're averaging
about $270 per square foot

-here at the store.
-Well, if you think about it,

a ski boot is really
a square foot.

-Right? The flat part,
right at the toe, you put in...
-Kyle, focus.

parts of the store

that are earning
more than $270 per square foot

will get more space.

The parts that are not
will be reduced.

From where I sit, the bike
department is killing it.

Yeah, uh, the Grill's right
across from it, and I agree.

That's a good example.
During the pandemic,

we sold a lot of bikes--
very successful department.

Yeah, I mean,
people love exercising outdoors.

they just like riding away

from their families
during the pandemic.

I guess I should be glad
my space is literally too small

to be downsized.

Do you actually need the chair?

Are you sure
you want to do this?

Yes. Look at it.

I don't know how I ended up
with so many clothes.

I do.

We traded our money for them.

Kyle texted "911 emergency."

It's an emergency.
The worst kind.

A fashion emergency.

So that's why Vanessa laughed

when I told her
to call the cops.

No, the closet.

I'm getting rid
of anything that I don't need.

And she wants you to help her.

Oh, no, I can't.

I'm too busy... not wanting to.

No, Jen, Jen, Jen.

No, come on, you're
the perfect person to do this.

You're-you're organized,
you hate clutter,

and you're brutal.

Okay.

Let me be brutal.

You're incapable of letting
any of your clothes go.

Whatever I pull out,
you're just gonna put back in.

No, I won't.
I promise.

Yeah, and when Mandy
makes a promise,

she gets pretty darned close
to keeping it.

Okay.

But if I do this,
we do it my way.

I'll need three hours
interrupted,

one large box, packing tape,
and all my decisions are final.

Okay, and then what
about the shelves in...

No questions.

Great.
Okay, thank you.

All right, come on, Mandy.
No, no, no, no, no.

-Come on, babe,
they've never loved you back.

Still hard at it, huh?

Yeah.

I think I figured out
what I need to do.

Oh. Then why are you still
going through all these files?

Well, the answer is, um,
actually quite painful.

Well, I mean, if it helps,

it'll mean
we can finally go to Peru.

And you better pack light,

because Peru is not Chile.

You're laughing at my pun?

It must be really painful.

No matter how many ways
I look at it,

I still come up
with the same answer.

We're gonna
have to shut the Grill down.

No.

Kris has...

given so many years
to that restaurant.

Well, a lot of restaurants
suffered during the pandemic,

and the Grill is no exception.

Isn't there another option?
Can't you just trim

from a-from
a different department?

Could do that.

We could eliminate, uh,
like, say, footwear.

"Hey, Mr. Johnson,
we no longer sell hiking boots,

"but you could strap an...
an ostrich filet to your foot

-with a piece of kale
around it."
-All right.

Okay, all right, I guess not.

Oh, honey,

-Kris is gonna be devastated,
just devastated.
-No kidding.

Only way to fix things at work
is to break my daughter's heart.

Mm.

Hey, maybe we could
go to Peru right now.

Screw Peru.

Just beer me.

All right,

when Kris gets here,
let me do the talking,

-all right?
-Yeah, yeah. She's worked

so hard for this place,

-it's breaking my heart.
-Yeah.

She's like
a granddaughter to me.

Well, I'm sorry
I'm doing this to you.

You've seen the analytics.

The numbers
speak for themselves.

Yeah, but there must be
something we can do.

Look, for example,
what if a generous,

handsome, unnamed patron
were to purchase

a thousand bison chops
from the Grill?

Hey, then we could
start our own restaurant.

-Hey, doll. Come on in.
-Oh!
-Hi, gentlemen.

Take a seat.

Doesn't she look beautiful!
Look at that.

Ed, Ed, Ed.
Hold it together.

Uh, okay, l-listen, so, I've...

-been going over the numbers,
-Yeah.

and I think I found a solid way

to rebalance
the store's financials.

Well, that's great news.

Yeah, well,
how are you gonna do that?

We have to close the Grill.

You see?
I knew it.

What?

W-Wait.
Am I the only one here

that's concerned
for your feelings?

Our revenue per square foot
has dropped 63%

since the pandemic, and...

as much as I want it to,
Dad, uh,

I don't see any sign
of a rebound, so...

That's exactly
what you came up with.

I thought this
would devastate you.

No.
I'm not devastated.

Oh, now, that's...
that's a huge relief.

I'm completely destroyed.

But, uh, it's what's best
for the business.

The numbers--
they speak for themselves.

They-they do.
Listen, I know this is hard,

it really is hard, and...

and, uh, don't worry about,
uh, letting your staff go.

I'll-I'll handle that.

Yeah, your dad is very good
at letting people go.

You know,
Bob in the art department,

he just asked me out for lunch.

I paid, you know,
because I-I just fired him.

Well, I appreciate
the offer, Dad,

but this is my staff.

I hired them, and I'll be
the one to let them go.

I'm proud of you, Kris.

Good.
You can take me out to dinner.

You'll have to pay.

Oh, my God!
Jen, this is amazing.

You could get a job
cleaning up crime scenes.

Ooh!
Or organizing closets.

It was a lot of work.

Oh, and I found a book report

on The Great Gatsby.

Aw, man, that's where that was.

I arranged by color,
and within each color,

I broke it down by season.

Well, these are all
my favorite clothes.

There is not one thing in here
that I don't love.

Oh, look. Seven-year-old Mandy
was only five foot, six.

That was a tough year for me.

I was taller than my teacher.

So...

this is everything
you're getting rid of?

Yep.

Uh, so, what's in there,
exactly?

Doesn't matter.
The fact that you don't know

means that you won't miss it.

That's really smart.

Shall we take a look?

Uh, no. No, no.
That was the agreement.

You're right.
You're right.

Jen makes the final decision.

I will not look in the box.
Thank you, Jen.

You're welcome. And the fact
that you didn't notice

this necklace,
and I don't work for free,

thank you.

There you are.

-Hey, I've been looking for you.
-Listen,

if you're all hopped up
on liquor and want to fight,

-I'm good at this.

No. Uh, I think
you can hire my staff

in other parts of the store.

I'm all ears.

Okay, well, uh, Isabella,
she has a great personality.

She would be a natural
in customer relations.

Steve is an avid cyclist,

he'd be perfect
in the bike department.

I mean, I... Look.
I've typed them all out.

All right.

Well, you put a lot of work
into this.

Uh, well, yeah. I guess once
I was forced to fire my staff,

I realized
they weren't just my staff.

They were my people.

And I can't let my people down.

When did you become such
a compassionate businesswoman?

Hi, I'm Mike Baxter's daughter.

Well, listen, you're gonna have
to go to HR and discuss this.

Already did.
I spent all morning

going over the lateral hires
with Kyle.

It turns out
I actually saved the company

quite a bit of dough
on recruitment costs.

I love the sound of that.

We close the Grill,
but we don't lose any employees.

Mm, not quite.

Couldn't find a position
for the manager.

You.

There's no restaurant
for me to manage.

I'll be okay.

Thank goodness your husband
sells drugs for a living.

Thanks for everything, Dad.

Oh, hey, Jen.
Is that a new dress?

No. It's one of Mandy's
old sweaters.

My closet's full of them.

-That smells fantastic.
What is it?
-Yeah.

It is braised short rib.

I only make it when
Mike's feeling, you know, down.

Like when he missed something
he shot at.

He's more sensitive
than people think.

Now that you mention it,

I don't think
I've ever seen Mr. Baxter sad.

I've only seen him annoyed

-and shamelessly
pleased with himself.
-I know.

Yeah.

What does he have
to be sad about?

Well, this thing with Kristin
and the Grill closing.

He was so proud
when she took over

and made it successful,
and now he's just devastated.

-Mm.
-Hey, guys.

What's going on
on this beautiful night, huh?

What?

Every day,
something new to confuse me.

No, I-I don't understand.

You were devastated when
I talked to you on the phone,

and that was only
half an hour ago.

That was then.
This is now.

Changed my mind
when I was driving down I-70,

saw that big
Outdoor Man billboard

with my smiling face on it.

So, seeing a picture of yourself
made you feel better?

Generally,
I drive by that billboard,

-same one,
I get kind of bummed out.
Mm-hmm.

'Cause I wonder when I retire,
what's gonna happen?

I mean, who can fill

those rather attractive
European rock climbing shoes?

Tonight, it was different.

I drove by there, I got an idea.

When I pack it in,

Outdoor Man
can be run by Kristin.

Kris.
Of course.

-Of c... Wow. I...
Yeah, I love that idea.
-She's got

-great business instincts.
Yeah.

Great.
She's the one that told me

the Grill
should be closed, right?

-She's great with her staff.
Mm-hmm.

You know what else
she did today?

Tell me.
I want to know what my baby did.

What, what, what?

She relocated her entire staff
into the store.

She's got
great management skills.

-She's got a big heart.
Yeah,

she really does.

Oh, you know,
I-I want to find that potholder

she made me in third grade.

I love this.

-Outdoor Man
is gonna be run by a woman.
Mm.

Just like that,
you turn it political.

Well, this is so incredible.

Yeah.
Yeah.

Uh, but-but there is
only one problem.

-Um...
-What's the problem?

What are we gonna do
with the short rib?

I only ever make it
when you're sad.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.
O-Okay, okay, um...

Do I have to share it with Jen?

Of course.

Then I'm very sad.

What are you doing?

Shh, I'm sleepwalking.

It's dangerous to wake me up.

You were gonna
look inside the box.

I got to know what's in there.
Kyle, it's driving me crazy.

What if there's
something in there

that I want to wear
six years from now?

All right.

If I tell you what's in there,
will you drop it?

How could you know
what's in there?

Because I know
what's not in the closet.

The blue romper

that you were wearing

the-the time that pigeon
landed on your foot.

The, uh, striped sweater
you had on

when we ran out of gas in Aspen
and had to push the car.

The Christmas dress
you were wearing

when I told you
that Rudolph joke

and you laughed so hard

that eggnog
just shot out of your nose.

The dress you were wearing
to your cousin's wedding.

You didn't outshine her,

but, boy, did you come close.

Should I keep going?

You remember all my outfits?

Of course I do.

Everything you've ever worn
is tied to some great memory.

That's the sweetest thing
anyone's ever said to me.

It's true.

And these clothes
aren't going anywhere!

Our life is in this box.

All right, how about this?

You keep all these clothes,

and I get rid of all of mine.

You know what?
No.

It's okay.

The memories
are what's important.

We can let all of these clothes
go. I don't need them.

I have you.

And you can buy me more clothes.

Can you say that again so I know
that I heard you right?

I think, Kris,
you're the perfect candidate

to take over Outdoor Man
when I retire.

Holy cow.

I never thought I would hear you
say the word "retire."

That's like hearing you say,
"Go, Raiders."

Oh, take the knife
out of my back.

Ed and I talked about it,

and we both think
you have the right instincts

to become the future CEO.

CEO?

-Future CEO.

-Is this an elaborate prank?
-No.

Like-like that time that you,
uh, convinced Kyle

that you were the purple ostrich
from The Masked Singer?

I almost had him.
I almost had him.

But no, this is real.
And I know it's a lot.

I know it's serious.
I want you to think about it.

Go home, talk to Ryan about it
and get back to me, okay?

It's an amazing offer, Dad.

I... I don't need time
to think about it.

I didn't think you would.

My answer is no.

Yeah.

"No" like,
"There's no way I can say no"?

No.
As in "no."

Why would you turn down
this big opportunity?

It's-it's financial security.
You get to be your own boss.

-You-you get your own door.

Yeah.
Because I know you.

Y-You will never
leave this place.

What are you talking about?
You know,

I've always said
I was gonna retire someday.

Yeah, I-I don't think you could
ever let this place go.

Who in their right mind would
stay at Outdoor Man forever?

Hey.
I'm making nachos in the office.

Anyone want to chip and dip?

Not now, Ed.

All right.

But don't come crying to me
after they're all gone, huh?

I said who in their right mind.

Listen, you are Outdoor Man.

Your whole identity
is wrapped up in this business.

You really think
you can ever let that go?

It may come news to you,
but I have aspirations

outside of this
very aromatic office.

You serious about this, Dad?

Your mom and I
have a whole second act planned.

And I-I'm excited
to spend time with her,

so don't mess this up.

And when does this second act
begin?

As soon as you're ready
to step up and take over.

Uh, and how long will that take?

A year?

A year to teach you
everything I know

about running the business?

-Fat chance of that.
-Mm.

So, two years?

Yeah.

-Okay.
-Okay.

I want it in writing.

I just said I was gonna retire.

Yeah, yeah.
That's nice.

But I want it in the contract

that you will retire
in two years.

Okay.

And I want it to say that
if you don't leave in two years,

I will get
a big penalty payment.

How big?

Hmm, that's something my, uh,
lawyer will have to figure out.

Your lawyer?

Boy, you turned into
a real pain in the ass.

No. No, no, no. I'm just...
I'm Kristin Baxter,

-future CEO.
-Future CEO.

-Is this thing
happening or what, huh?

Yes. Yeah.
Uh...

I will not let you guys down.

Outdoor Man
will be in great hands.

-Ah. All right.
You're a pro, Kris.

You're a pro.
Come on.

You know, sometimes,

I still see her
as a little girl,

you know, all grown up.

Just keep it together, Mike.

Try it with a smile.
Come on.

Hey, Mike Baxter
for Outdoor Man.

You know,
they say being a parent

is the toughest job
in the world.

That's only because "they"
never operated

a horizontal jackhammer
in a coal mine.

Once you've had
a giant pneumatic drill

banging against your chest
all day,

I'll bet
changing a stinky diaper's

actually pretty fun.

-No, being a parent

isn't the toughest job
in the world,

but it is the most important.

And every child will give you
at least one moment

where you feel like you've
completely blown it, right?

They fail a math test
or a driver's test

or a pregnancy test.

And you think
you've failed, too, right?

But then,
if you've done your job right,

your kid will show you

a resilience
you never knew they had.

As parents, we get up every day
and work hard

so we can take care of our kids,

but there's
no more gratifying feeling

than realizing
we've done a good job.

Good enough that they
can take care of themselves.

Because, let's face it,
once they can do that,

we know they can take care
of us, too.

And I, for one, plan on being
every bit as demanding

as my kids were
when they were with me.

Maybe I'll get a little bell.

-"I want soup.

"Not that stuff in a can.

That weird stuff in a box."

Baxter out. Huh?

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