All language subtitles for Every.Days.a.Holiday.1937.BRRip_English

Oh, flutter by

lover of mine -little butterfly

butterfly

but don't fly away, fly
away, fly away from me

I would die -i would die

little butterfly -butterfly

if you fly away, fly away, fly away from me

don't fly away

oh, you tell that to all the other flies

said the butterfly to the bee

and I'm sure you love me

I'm too young to get stung

so, say goodbye -say goodbye

- to the butterfly
- To the butterfly

fly away, fly away, fly away with me

fly away

Don't fly away, fly away, fly away from me

say, boss, flannigan wants to know
if he's good for a drink.

- Has he had it?
- He has.

He is.

Hello, tilly, hello, Dolly!

- Well, well, Jake!
- Ah, nifty.

Happy new year, folks.
Greetings and salutations.

It's good to see a man duded up like you.

Thanks, Jake, well you know, old boy,
it ain't every night

that we cast aside 100 years
and make a deal for another 100.

- That's right.
- Yessiree.

Happy new year, Jerry.
Bailey, happy new year.

Remember the name, sailor.
Hello, there, Tom.

Well, Mike, greetings...
Oh, happy new year.

Brooks.

Say, uh, Mike, where, uh,
where's peaches?

Peaches o'day, she ain't here no more.

What, peaches not here?

Oh, that's bad, that's bad,
that's bad news.

- She had to leave town.
- Ahh.

Selling the Brooklyn bridge again, huh?

- Smart girl, that peaches.
- Yes,

but what gets me is
how she gets away with it.

Mm, me too.

Oh, but look, you can't tell me
she won't be in town on new year's Eve.

Well, you better make your rounds
a little later, nifty,

and you may just happen to run into her.

Mhm, yeah, Mike, I'll do that little thing.

You know, Mike,
I'm gonna make a million dollars,

maybe two million.

Well, happy new year, Mike.

- A very happy new year.
- Goodnight.

Now, I don't wanna
have to tell you boys this again,

but this Van doon and his reform gang
are raising plenty of ned with me.

I know there's gonna be
a lot of trouble in town tonight,

and it's up to you boys
to keep it down to a minimum.

Let's wind up the old year
with a good record, huh?

All right, boys, that's all,
merry Christmas to all of you.

I mean, uh, happy new...
Yeah, happy new year's, too.

- Where's mccarey?
- I don't know, but it was a fine speech, boss.

- Huh?
- I say it was a fine speech.

- Oh, yeah, thanks.
- Yeah, fine speech.

Thanks.

Especially that part about Christmas,
I liked that.

I thought you said you couldn't find him.

I couldn't.

Now, listen here, captain mccarey,

I'm gonna tell you this for the last time:
Round her up.

- Round who up?
- You know who I'm talking about,

peaches o'day, you reported
that she left town a month ago.

- Sure, I did.
- Well, she's back.

I cover this town like a rug
and I ain't seen hide or hair of her.

Yeah, maybe you don't wanna see her.

There's a sucker inside now
yelling his lungs out

because she sold him
the Brooklyn bridge.

Oh, well then,
she must've sold it to him by mail.

Give me that warrant.

Here's your warrant, bring her in.

All right, inspector, I'll bring her in,
if I can find her.

Never you mind about that,
she's in town, you get her.

Who for, you or the city?

For me... for the city!

- Merry Christmas, inspector.
- Merry, chri... get going!

Hello, tell every detective on duty tonight
to be on the lookout for peaches o'day.

She's back in town, yeah.

Boss, you sure hate that peaches o'day.

No worse than she hates me,
and I am like an elephant,

- I never forget.
- What's an elephant got to remember?

Oh, you...

Quit bothering me!
Will ya listen?

I wanna get out of here,
it's Christmas... I mean...

Get my hat and coat!

Hurry it up, will ya,
I got an appointment I don't wanna miss.

Can't go any faster, Ms. peaches,
it's against the law.

The law, the law.

It's getting to be a body can't breathe
without a flatfoot checking up on ya.

That's one of them there
horseless carriages.

The ones I rode in ain't been so fancy.

Catch up with him,
I wanna look it over.

- How do ya do?
- Hello, my pleasure.

I thought it would be.

I see you're out for a gallop.

Oh, it's these cobblestones
that make me appear to be galloping.

You ever take a ride in an automobile?
It's quite an experience.

- Oh, I have lots.
- Auto?

No.

Suppose I could persuade you
to take a spin with me?

That ain't a bad idea,
if I could meet you a little later.

Well, I'd be delighted,
in fact, I'd be thrilled to the core.

Maybe we could ring in
the new year together, huh?

- I'm beside myself.
- You certainly are.

- My card.
- Oh.

Here's mine.

Peaches, how winsome.

- You think so?
- Yes, it is.

Say, I wouldn't miss this opportunity
for anything in the world.

- You won't lose my address?
- Say, when I lose an address I lose my mind.

Well, goodbye, see ya later.

Goodbye.

Well, come on, hurry up,
I ain't here to collect icicles.

Forgive me, please, I did not wish to be late,
but when I was running around the corner

I slipped in the slush, and my feet
went up, and the rest of me went down.

Well, that's life for ya, ups and downs.
Have you got the money?

Oh, directly as we have arranged,
$200 and the Brooklyn bridge is mine.

$200? Why, I told you $300,
what are you trying to do, swindle me?

But, please, lady, I'm an honest man.

- That's what I took ya for.
- So... so, you are not mad at me?

No, I ain't mad, I just wanna
get this transaction over with.

You know, the only way to do a thing is to
do it, if you know what I mean, George.

Please, excuse me,
Fritz krausmeyer is the name.

All right, Charlie, hand over the $200.

But, excuse me, the name is Fritz.

So, it's Fritz, count the money.

50, 100,

150, 200.

Sold to the gentleman
with the mouthful of marbles.

And now I am the proprietor
of the Brooklyn bridge.

- Here's your receipt.
- I cannot express my joy.

I'm all choked up with a bump in my throat.

I know just how ya feel.
Well, goodbye and good luck.

I hope you enjoy your bridge,
when this one wears out

I'll send you a new one.

Ah, what a beautiful structure!

Hey, cut that out, bill,
people'll think you know me.

Fritz, please.

Fritz.

Should auld acquaintance be forgot

and never brought to mind

for auld lang syne, my dear

for auld lang syne

we'll take a cup o' kindness yet

for auld lang syne

should auld acquaintance be forgot

and never brought to mind

- hey, mister.
- Huh?

- Dropped your wallet.
- Oh, thank you, sir.

- You can't do nothing to me.
- You sure?

Better watch your step, mccarey, I got it
in with your boss, "honest" John quade.

Sure you have, everybody has.

- You don't want him to get sore at you.
- Quade?

He's one of my closest friends,
we just had a dish of tea together.

You know John stands downtown with the
big boss, too, they sleep together.

Well, that's nice and chummy.

Better let me go, mccarey,
I'm warning you,

you'll get broke if you don't.

Well, that's very interesting.

Now listen, you,
I'm gonna do that every time I see ya.

- Are you getting out of town?
- Yes, sir.

- So, you're back in town?
- Well, I ain't got no twin.

Too bad you ain't, maybe you could
get her to sit in the jail for ya.

Ha, everything a flatfoot says
is funny to me.

Just a minute,
I wouldn't borrow trouble if I was you.

- Borrow it, why, I got it to give away.
- Yeah, you're in for more of it.

You know I can't let you
get away with it forever.

- Why did you come back?
- Well, it's new year's Eve, that's why.

That ought to mean something,
even to a copper.

Yeah, well there's no holidays
in my business.

You're still my chief worry.

Why worry? Just forget about me
and we'll both be happy.

I wish it was as easy as that,
but it ain't.

Why do you suppose
I never run you in before?

You tell me.

Because I happen to be
chump enough to like you.

I ain't expecting no flatfoot to like me
any more than I'm liking a flatfoot.

Brush that chip off your shoulder
and listen a minute.

Take that badge off your vest
and maybe I will.

Peaches, whatever you think of me

ain't nearly as important
as what you should think of yourself.

You got good stuff in you,
if you'll only give it a chance to work.

You've got brains, you're clever,
plenty of talent,

and, well, you ain't hard to look at.

Yeah.

Well, with those qualities, if you went
straight, there's no reason in the world

why you shouldn't go to the top.

The top of what?

Hey, stop mothering me,
I'm doing all right.

All right, all right, have it your way.

But this is the last and final chance
I'm giving ya.

Now, you gotta get out of town
inside of an hour and stay out.

I got a warrant for you
and strict orders to bring you in.

Oh, it ain't from me.

It's from quade, personally.

Quade, why, that cheap, grafting heel.

He's sore 'cause I wouldn't
hand him a tumble.

Do ya mean he made love to ya?

Well, he went through all the emotions.

Well, that part of it's all right, but you're
still breaking the law and I'm still a cop.

Either you get out of town tonight or I'll
have to slap that warrant on you, see?

They got me all wrong.

I might crack a law now and then,
but I ain't never broke one.

The only law you ain't ever broke
is the law of gravity.

That's an idea,
I'll go to work on that right away.

Ooh, you might need it.

I have been trying to tell you gentlemen
for the last two hours

that all our work for months
as the reform committee

of the city of New York
will be a shambles!

Will be a shambles unless we stop the
nefarious, unmerciful grafting activities

of this police inspector
who calls himself "honest" John quade.

We must get rid of
"honest" John quade!

But, Mr. Van doon,
must it be done tonight of all nights?

New year's Eve is the proper time to do it,
then we can all start the new year right.

Psst, psst, psst.

Graves, graves, what is it, what is it?

I beg pardon,
could I see you for a moment, sir?

Can't you see I'm making a speech?

Yes, sir, and very good, sir,
but this is a matter of life and death.

Mr. Van doon,
we must be running along anyhow.

We all have engagements tonight,
won't you join us?

Anyone who goes out
on a new year's Eve is an idiot!

- Goodnight.
- Goodnight.

- Happy new year.
- Happy new year!

- Get me a drink, get me a drink!
- Yes, sir.

Committee on reform going out
on a new year's Eve.

I've never heard anything
like it in my life.

- Soda.
- Oh, I...

Confound you!

You blundering idiot,
what's wrong with you tonight?

At dinner time, you salted my coffee,
sugared my soup, and buttered my vest.

- Now you're trying to drown me.
- I beg your pardon, sir,

but I'm caught on the horns
of a fearful dilemma.

Well, unhook yourself and explain.

- I thought I'd have the evening off tonight.
- You thought, you think too much.

Look at me, I never think.

Yes, sir, that's right,
but peaches makes one think.

Well, then don't eat them.

No, that's the young lady's name, sir,
peaches, peaches o'day.

You can't get off.

- More soda.
- Yes, sir.

Confound it!
What's wrong with this thing?

- The bell, the bell, answer the bell, answer!
- Yes, sir.

Will ya answer the bell, you fool, you?

Graves, graves, answer that bell!

- We don't want any, thank you.
- Hey, what kind of a game is this?

Oh, my word, it's you, Ms. peaches.

Well, I always keep my word,
even though it's no good,

not quite, but I'm glad you're here.

Yeah, now we can take that spin
around the gay wide way, you know?

Well, I've been trying for it all evening,
but I've been delayed.

Oh.

My, what a snug, little
hideout you got here.

- I beg pardon.
- I said it's a swell dive.

Yes, no doubt it is.

- Won't you sit down?
- What for? I ain't tired.

Graves, graves,
what in blazes are you doing so long?

- Why didn't you say you had company?
- Oh, I meant to explain that.

That's all right,
friends of yours are friends of mine.

Graves!

- What is he, a hog caller?
- Yes, uh, no, uh...

Would you excuse me for a moment?

Why, sure, I'll just make a few notes
about this place in my diary.

Yes.

- Graves!
- Yes, sir, yes, sir.

- Oh, there you are.
- What am I gonna do, sir?

- She's here, peaches is here.
- Here, in my house, a woman?

She doesn't know that I'm a Butler.

How dare you go around in my employ,
misleading women.

I didn't mislead her, sir.

It's just an impression she has,
a wrong impression.

I'll see about that, my man.

No woman has crossed my threshold
in 20 years!

A woman was the bane of my early life,

and if I thought that I'd have to go through
the same torture in the 20th century

that I did in the 19th, I'd... I... I...

I won't have it!

I won't

Mm.

- My coat!
- Yes, sir.

Graves, you may present me
to the fair lady.

Okay.

Oh, there you are, boys, I was just
beginning to crave a little action.

Peaches, allow me to present Mr. Van
reighle Van pelter Van heusen Van doon.

- The third.
- Well anyway, I'm pleased to meet ya.

I'm delighted, I'm sorry
we kept you waiting.

- But, graves, my but... my secretary...
- And treasurer?

Yes, exactly.

Oh, he informs me
you're keeping a diary.

Oh, yes, my motto is, "keep a diary
and some day it'll keep you."

Oh, uh, shall we go into supper?

- My arm.
- What's the matter with it?

- My arm.
- Oh, oh, pardon me.

Ah, this reminds me of a double date.

Reminds me of the three musketeers, that's
possibly because there are three of us.

What's the matter, you gonna make a speech?

Yes, I was thinking about...
Oh no, I just finished one.

Oh, my, what a lovely conversatory.

Yes, it is a lovely converse...
Uh, conservatory.

- To you.
- To the Van doons.

You know, the Van doons
are not as straitlaced as...

As they're laced up to be.

You know, we've had a lot
of skeletons in our closet.

- Did you ever have a skeleton in your closet?
- No, ours have all been strong and healthy.

Uh, what time is it?

- It's 11:00.
- 11:00? Say, we gotta get out of here.

We can't let 12:00
catch us laying down on the job.

20th century only comes
once in a lifetime.

- We gotta welcome it proper.
- We oughta whoop it up.

- Yeah.
- Yeah, let joy be unrefined.

- Well, let's get intoxicated.
- Let's have a drink.

Soda.

- Graves!
- Oh, I'm sorry.

- That's all right.
- Oh, you better change your shirt.

You look like a wet towel.

You better drive me over
while I change my clothes.

You're not gonna leave me here alone
in the 20th century, are you?

- Oh, we'll be back for you, vanny, old boy.
- Oh, we'll be back for you, vanny, old boy.

We'll be back for you, vanny, old boy.

Oh, that's me.

Graves!

Oh, peppermint.

Look, Mr. krausmeyer, you been robbed,
rooked, conned, bungled, grifted.

Will you please speak english?
I do not understand that language.

Listen, you, listen.

Don't you know that the Brooklyn bridge
belongs to the taxpayers of this city,

and can't be sold by one person to another?

Is that so?
But I got it already, I gave the lady $200.

She gave me the Brooklyn bridge,
and here, right here, is the receipt.

- What lady?
- The lady that...

- Quiet.
- The lady that sold me the Brooklyn bridge.

- What did she look like?
- Oh, she looked so... so... so...

Cut out the enthusiasm.

Come here, now look here, Fritz,
which would you rather do?

Get your $200 back, or go to jail for a
couple of years for buying stolen property?

Jail? But I don't want to go to jail.

All right.

Here's your 200 bucks.

I'll keep it a secret.

Beat it, don't buy any more Bridges.

Are you sure I don't have to go to jail?

No.

Maybe I will.

Oopsy Daisy. Gosh, I feel dizzy.

All I've had to drink is water
for chasers all evening.

You'll get used to feeling dizzy
before the night's over.

- Quite an establishment here.
- Just stand over here a minute.

- Over here?
- Yeah, don't move.

Say, this glass is awfully cold on my nose.

Quiet.

I didn't know you were
gonna do my portrait.

This is just the frame.

- Am I a good subject?
- Yeah, you're a hot sketch.

Hmm.

Quiet.

Quiet.

I'm not having much fun.

- My word, did I do that?
- Well, you're more or less responsible.

Now, get in there and do as I tell ya.

Oh, uh, get me that model over there.

No, no, no, not that way,
over in the corner.

Over in that corner, the one...
One right next to the corner.

No, no... oh, this guy's
gonna be tough to break in.

Why, let's have a little action now,
get me that ermine cape.

The cape over there...
No, white with the black streaks.

Oh, this guy'll never do,
he don't know furs.

Well, put it on, put it on,
that's it, put it on.

Now, turn around,
let's see the back of it.

Come on, get the other angle around,
that's great.

Now, take that hat over there...
Get that hat over there.

Over there, take it off, take it off.

Take it... take the hat off, yeah.

Oh, drop it, drop it!

Come on, get this hat over here.

Come on, this hat over here.

No, no, no, no.

- Tidy little chapeau.
- Well, if it looks good on you

it'll look terrible on me, throw it away.

Try that other one on.

- Fetching little ensemble.
- Who asked ya?

Get over there, get over there,
in back of that dummy.

Get over there, and get back there now.

Not that dummy, the other dummy.

Don't move.

Come here, hurry up.

Our mind's made up, look,

I want this here cape,
I want that big, black hat,

and that dress over there,
that black dress, take it off the dame.

- May I make a suggestion?
- No, everything's all right.

Bend, bend, bend.

Out, out.

Say, hasn't this a slight touch of larceny?

Larceny, nothin'.
You'll send 'em a check in the morning.

Oh, I will.

There. Oh, and listen, be more careful
with your remarks hereafter.

- Oh, I'm sorry.
- Throw it in there.

Now, uh, go and get that dummy.

The one over there.

I don't want the guy,
stand him over there.

Come on, come on, let's go.

I hope I don't go to the gallows for this.

You won't go to the gallows,
you'll go to the dogs.

Not that way, the other way.

I'll never use this guy again.

Looks crowded,
I hope we don't have to stand up.

Well, I've never been stood up yet.

Good evening, Mr. rector.

This is a real pleasure, Mr. Van doon.

- May I sit on your right hand?
- You better sit on a chair.

Isn't that Van reighle Van doon?

Why, he hasn't been seen
in a public place for years.

Who's that stunning creature with him?

The old boy certainly has good taste.

That must be his niece,
she's been studying abroad.

You remember that darling, flaxen-haired
little girl, don't you, Caroline?

Of course,
and a perfect little dear she was, too.

Oh, we simply must go and say hello.

- Good evening, Van reighle.
- These people seem to know us.

- Good evening, good evening.
- Oh, it's so nice to see you again.

- Is this your niece?
- My niece?

No... yeah, oh yes, yes, my niece.

Oh, when did you graduate
from finishing school?

Why, I just finished.

- Peaches just finished.
- Oh, you call her peaches?

- How sweet.
- How quaint.

But I know the boys are just dying
to ask you to dance.

May I be the first on your list?

Uh, that isn't fair, peaches,
you promised me first.

Quiet, graves.

Hello, young lady,
a very happy new year to you.

Be very kind to this,
I knew its mother.

Oh, peaches.

Peaches.

Will you pardon me?
I'll be right back.

I'm afraid I'll have to.

Say, I'm certainly glad I found you,
I've been looking all over town for you.

I've been chasing around,
and my legs are worn off at the knees.

- Well, I'm glad to see ya, nifty.
- Say, peaches, I'm putting on a show,

and I got a part for you,
you'll be simply crazy about it.

Wait until you see the costumes,
the music, the scenery, beautiful,

and the score, wait till you hear it,
the music is lovely.

Well, I wouldn't mind taking a crack
at that kind of work again, but...

- Great, fine!
- But I can't do it.

Well, I ain't standing so good
with the law these days.

See, there's a flock of wild ones
skulking around town

who'd pick me up on sight.

Spot me in the showroom,
clear me out right away.

Bad as that, huh?

Yeah, well I'm taking a big chance
being here tonight.

Say, now, wait a minute, wait a minute now.

Will you let me think?
Let me think. Let me think.

Forget it, nifty,
I gotta get back to my table.

- Who are ya with?
- Oh, I'm here with a rich society swell,

and get this,
his friends think I'm his niece

just home from a French finishing school,
can you beat it?

- No fooling.
- It's a good thing I can parlez-vous francais a little.

Hey, you speak French?

Yeah, a little, didn't you know that?

Well, I don't know what it means,
but it sounds awful good to me.

Say, wait a minute,
I got it, I got it, I got it,

wait just a minute,
it's coming, it's coming.

- I thought you said you got it.
- Peaches, I've got it.

We'll change your name
so nobody will know ya.

You'll be a French actress,
that's it, a French star.

First appearance in americal!
Why, it'll be sensational.

- It'll be marvelous.
- Whose bankroll you using?

Whose... huh? Oh, that, oh, well...

Well, don't... don't worry about that,
I'm working on that now.

Same old trouble, huh, nifty?

Well, look, I'm here with a couple of guys

that have got enough money
to buy the mint.

Oh, you mean a couple of angels?

Well, they ain't yet,
but maybe I can grow some wings on them.

Come on.

Now, Mr. Van doon,
you understand everything thoroughly.

You're backing the show,
now isn't it great?

- How much is it gonna cost?
- Well, now I figure...

Scenery, costumes, actors,
music, and me.

I figure it'll be about $25,000.

Yeah, between $25,000 and $200,000.

Are you going to be the leading lady?

I admit it, boys, but keep it a secret.

Ah, gentlemen, believe me,
she's lovely, she's marvelous!

We can't miss with this show.

Mr. Van doon,
have you ever taken a trip to gay Paris?

Have I ever been to gay Paris?

- Have you ever been to gay Paris?
- Have I ever been to gay Paris?

Has she... ha,
they're crazy about her in Paris.

They want me back,
in fact, there's a reward out for...

Happy new year!

- Happy new year!
- Happy new year!

- Happy new year!
- Hap...

Py new year!

Ladies and gentlemen,

in exactly one minute,

we will welcome in a new year,

and a new century,
the 20th century!

For auld lang syne

- hooray!
- Happy new year!

- Happy new year!
- Oh, I have an irresistible impulse

to do something
I have always dreamed of.

Tonight's your night to do
anything you want, vanny old boy!

Go ahead, vanny old boy!

Yippee!

Yippee!

Happy new year!

Hap...

Py new year!

Hap...

Py new year!

Happy new year!

Gentlemen, I suppose you know

that rector's restaurant
was wrecked rester... yesterday

by a lady who is known as peaches o'day,

and who has no less than
25 warrants out for her arrest.

Now, unless she is brought in,

there's gonna be
one of the biggest shakedowns...

Shakeups that this department
has ever known.

Now, get going.

That goes double for you, mccarey.

This thing reflects on my honesty.

- Honesty?
- Yes, have you ever heard it questioned?

I never even heard it mentioned.

Why don't you let me
take care of that flatfoot for you, boss?

Nah, not yet.

He's too well known as an honest cop.

You can't get at a guy like that
till he gives you an opening.

He won't take a bribe.

He loves his job,
he's in with the clean newspapers,

he ain't interested in politics, he...

Ah, he's just one of them honest cops.

Well, I'd sure like to take a crack at him.

You'll get your chance, don't worry.

So will I.

He'll make a slip.

- Hello, nifty.
- Hello there, peaches.

My, you certainly do look classy.
Come on, sit right on, sit down.

I'm glad you came in.

Well, now look, when you land in town
as mademoiselle Fifi from Paris,

you've gotta have a swell entrance.

You know, you just can't pop into New York
like you dropped in from nowhere, now can ya?

Where does mademoiselle Fifi come from?

Well, now look, disappear, get out of town.

Go up to new haven, Hartford, Boston,
that's it, Boston.

Just lay low till I give you the high sign,
do you follow me?

- I just passed it.
- The publicity will be wonderful.

Think of the ballyhoo for our show,
that'll make you front-page news.

- Now tell me, how do you like it?
- Oh, with one more brain, you'd be a genius.

Oh, uh, here's Van's first check.

That's just the beginning.

Certified, peaches,
and I owe it all to you.

Enough money to start my show,
oh, this is a wonderful day.

The sun is shining brightly,
the birds are singing sweetly

- oh, you mean more singing.
- What?

Don't you know you're breaking the law
when you harbor a fugitive from justice?

Fugitive from justice”? Peaches?

She's only been arrested 25 times
in the last few months.

What do you expect?
No woman is perfect.

You're looking at a guy who's made
a new year's resolution and kept it.

Well, now that you kept it,
what are you gonna do with it?

I'm through talking,
you're coming with me.

Ooh, uh,

pardon me while I have
a few last words with nifty.

All right, but no tricks.

Oh, thanks, thanks.

I won't need this artillery
where I'm going.

Besides, they're liable to frisk me,
and that'd be a little embarrassing.

All right, I'll take care of the hardware.

Oh, nifty, I thought I might
need this more than you.

Oh, so I'm back on a shoestring, huh?

You know, a little hush money
can do a lot of talking.

Here's your ticket and stateroom.

You'll notice they're only one way.

That's the only way I travel,
one way at a time.

Say, if it ain't asking too much,
where is she going?

I'm gonna put her on a boat for Boston.

Oh, Boston, the city of culture.

I can brush up on my etiquette.

It's either that or jail.

- Make the choice.
- I'll take Boston.

- Peaches, I'm certainly gonna miss ya.
- Me too.

- But she ain't gonna miss that boat, come on.
- Goodbye, nifty.

Don't worry, I'll send you
a postcard of bunker hill.

So long.

Boston.

Boston.

I wish you wouldn't make me
have to do these things.

Don't tell me you're
gettin' soft and lovin'.

I thought your feelings
was embroidered with brass buttons.

Better get aboard,
I'll stay here till she pulls out.

You're gonna be awful lonesome without me.

Maybe that's the truth.

A little memento to remember me by.

Gentlemen, you can fool
some of the people some of the time,

half the people half the time, a quarter
of the people a quarter of the time,

but sometimes
you can't fool the people at all.

Gentlemen, you can fool
some of the people some of the time,

and half the people half the time...

I rise one word of order.

Yes, sir, go ahead.

Where is our chair, Mr. Van doon?

Oh, he'll be here directly,
he's engaged in an important matter.

A matter of the greatest importance,
in fact, it's quite important.

Peaches will be ready,
she'll be here when we need her,

and in the meantime,
we're going to get more publicity

than p.T. Barnum ever thought of.

And we're going to have balloons,
balloons over herald square

with streamers on 'em,
and pennants on all the ferry boats,

on all the horse cars,
and all of the outgoing steamers.

- How about the incoming steamers?
- Well, well, Van, I couldn't do that to you.

You know that's going to be
a little bit extravagant.

- I don't like to waste your money, you see?
- Oh, money, money, money.

- Well, don't worry about me.
- Well, Van, I'm sorry, I'm a very busy man.

I've gotta skedaddle along,
I've got a million things to do.

- Yes, sir, a million things.
- I know you're a very busy man.

- Well, call me if you need me.
- Thank you, Van, I'll do that little thing.

Well, so long, old boy.

Oh, the meeting, oh.

You could fool some of the people
some of the time...

- Quade must not be mayor!
- Half the people half the time...

Quade must not be mayor!

You could fool some of the people
some of the time,

half the people half the time,

a quarter of the people
a quarter of the time,

but quade must not be mayor.

This is suicide, nifty,

covering up quade's billboard.

I'd like to live long enough
to see this show.

Danny, come here!

- You see that guy?
- Yeah.

- Go get him.
- Sure.

- Right this way, sir.
- Thanks.

Hello there, inspector,
you certainly are looking...

- You're looking fine.
- Listen, Bailey.

You know better than
to cover up my billboards, don't ya?

- Oh, why, certainly, inspector.
- Then, why did ya do it?

Well, that... that was all
a typographical error.

I'll have that eliminated immediately,
at once, if not sooner, yes, sir.

- Oh.
- Hey, wait a minute.

- Hm?
- Come here.

Say, listen, what kind of a gal
is this mademoiselle Fifi?

Oh, inspector, mademoiselle Fifi,
she's beautiful, she's a dream.

Just a minute. Just take a little peek
at those pictures.

Isn't she lovely?
Isn't she magnificent?

Of course, those pictures
don't do her justice.

She's twice as pretty as that.

Yes, sir. You know, inspector,
we're going to have the greatest opening

this city has ever seen.

She's going to have New York
right at her feet.

Looks like I'm going
to have to have a box.

Yes, yes, of course.
Stage box, with pleasure.

- Inspector, for how many?
- Oh, make it for six or eight.

Six or eight?

- For six.
- Better make it eight.

- Eight?
- Eight.

For eight.

There you are, sir,
the finest box in the house.

Oh, I'm sorry,
I dropped my pencil.

Ah, here it is. Well, inspector, I've got to
skedaddle along, got to mosey right along.

Got a million things to do,
million things.

Yes, sir, busy as a bee.

- Hello, nifty.
- Oh, hello, Mac.

Just a minute.
Heard from peaches lately?

Peaches? Oh, yes, yes.

I got a card from her yesterday.

- Where is she?
- Where is she?

Why, she's still up in Boston.

What are you doing here?

Why, the inspector wanted
a box for my opening.

- I'd like to see it myself.
- Well, Mac, then I'll...

I'll give you a pass
for the opening.

- There you are.
- Oh, thanks, nifty, that's very nice of you.

Don't mention it.

Wish he'd be satisfied
with bananas off of fruit stands.

I'm as nervous as a June bug.

I'm hot, soaked all over.

You ought to get out of those wet clothes
and into a dry Martini.

Yes. Huh?

La, la, la, la, la, la, la

we sell the papers,
we sell the news

viva la Fifi, oh, Fifi

we paint the picture,
we paint Fifi

we paint the eyes,
we paint the hair,

we paint her here,
we paint her there,

and everywhere we paint Fifi

We sell the flowers, the violets

so when you meet the girl, Fifi,
she smells as sweet as she can be

we buy some flowers
to give to Fifi

the fantasies that everyone here
to save the day, sweet Fifi

He blows the whistle
to clear the way

Fifi is now arriving,
for mademoiselle Fifi

she come, she come,
ooh-la-la-la-la-la

she come,
she come, ooh-la-la-la-la-la

she come, she come
ooh-la-la-la-la-la

Fifi, tres Jolie

sweet chérie, Fifi

Ooh-la-la!

Thank you very much.

Ladies and gentlemen,

I will now sing
my little French song in english.

You pardon my english.

She is not so good.

You've got to click the heel,

you've got to kiss the hand

if you want to make
the hit with Fifi

you've got to buy
the sparkling Jewel

and be prepared
to fight sword duel

you've got to,
oh, treat her well

and say, "oui, oui, mademoiselle,"

if you want to make
the hit with Fifi

you say, "non, what's the diff?"

There are 50 million other men
who will click the heel and kiss the hand

to make the hit with Fifi

you have to click the heels,

you have to kiss the hand

if you want to make
a hit with Fifi

you'll have to buy
the sparkling Jewel

and be prepared
to fight the duel

you'll have to treat her swell
and say "oui, oui, mademoiselle,"

or you won't be
quite the hit with Fifi

if you like to meet Fifi,

so why don't you come up
and see me?

Who will click the heels
and kiss the hand

to make a hit with Fifi

ah

Well done!

I think it was a wonderful show.

Mademoiselle Fifi
has a great deal of charm.

That makes a total of $9,352.

- And fifty cents.
- Yeah.

Well, it looks like we're
a tremendous success, doesn't it?

Tremendous? Why, to break even,
we only need $248,365.17.

- Eighteen cents.
- Nineteen cents.

Nineteen cents.

Come in.

Oh-ho! Oh, kid, I knew you'd do it.
What a hit! What a riot!

Did you see those babies
hanging off of the rafters?

Why, you got 'em eating
right out of the palm of your hand.

Yeah, did you see mccarey sitting out front
looking at me with his eagle eye?

- I wonder if he recognized me.
- No, not a chance in the world.

See who that is.

- Oh, it's you.
- Mr. quade asked me

to give this card
to mademoiselle Fifi.

I'm supposed to wait
for an answer.

Quade? Well, I'll see about it.

Peaches, peaches, it's from quade.
He's giving you the rush act.

He wants mademoiselle Fifi
to have supper with him.

Mm, I'd rather have supper
with a rattlesnake.

Shh, now, wait. Peaches, look, all these
flowers, these orchids, they were sent by quade.

Do you realize?
Quade is gonna be the next mayor.

And when a bird like quade falls,
he falls right through the cellar.

- You mean the gutter.
- Well, it wouldn't do any harm to see him.

Are you crazy? If I went out with him under
an alias and gave him a false delusion

and then he found out who I really was, I'd be
wearing handcuffs instead of these bracelets.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, peaches,
maybe you're right.

Yes, you're always right.

Oh, what'll I tell him?

Oh, tell him mademoiselle Fifi
is not in the mood.

Uh, tell him mademoiselle Fifi
do not like to meet the strange man.

Maybe in a week, a month,
a year, maybe never.

Tell him mademoiselle Fifi is
so temperamental, she annoy herself.

- Go, go! Tell him, tell him!
- All right.

- Oh, are you the man for Mr. quade?
- Yeah.

Well, mademoiselle Fifi
told me to tell you...

You can't tell me nothing,
I heard plenty.

I ain't got no tin ear.

Give me one ticket for tomorrow night,
first row in the aisle.

Sorry, captain,
we're all sold out.

You know, mademoiselle Fifi
is the rage of Paris.

- Is that so?
- Oh, yeah, yeah.

Oh, there you are.

Sorry, inspector,
she can't see you.

- She can't...
- She ain't never gonna see ya.

- Oh, she ain't.
- She's so temperamental,

she even annoys herself.

- Anything else?
- Besides, she ain't in the mood to see ya.

She ain't in the mood?

Well, who does she think she is?

Then nobody told her
I'm the police inspector?

Don't she know
I'm the kingpin in this town?

Huh.

She thinks she's gonna throw me down
like some nitwit steak store Johnny, huh?

And me sending her orchids
at 25 bucks a smell.

Oh, she don't know
who she's shoving around.

I'll wreck that joint,
I'll... I'll close the theater, I'll...

That's what I'll do,
I'll close the theater.

Close it up? For what reason?

- Well, you suggest something.
- It's haunted.

- Nah.
- It's too cold.

- It's too hot.
- No.

- It's a firetrap.
- Yeah, that's it.

That's it, it's a firetrap.

Hey, mccarey, come here.

- Evening, inspector?
- I got a job for you, Mac.

- Yeah?
- Yeah, this joint is a firetrap

and I want you to close it up.

This house ain't no firetrap.

- It's brand new.
- You heard what I said.

It's a firetrap. Close it.

You got the wrong boy, inspector.

I ain't doing no skullduggery.

I didn't say "skullduggery,”
I said "firetrap."

Like that cigar you're smoking.

Now never mind about that.
You got your orders, do it.

I ain't taking that kind of orders.

Get that through your head.

Why, you fatheaded flatfoot,
I got a good mind to... oh!

You saw him do it,
he tried to clip me.

- You saw him boys, didn't ya?
- I seen him.

He tried to slug ya,
he was coming right at ya.

Let him alone.

Oh, mccarey, I've been waiting a long time
for you to make this slip.

You've been insolent,
insubordinate, and smart-alecky,

and now I've got witnesses to prove that you
attempted to assault a superior officer.

It's your move, copper.

Hey, wait a minute,
wait a minute.

- Give me that badge.
- Don't wear it too close to your skin.

It might tarnish.

Oh, back in town, huh?

- So long, inspector.
- Say, Mac,

that was swell of ya,
but I'm awful sorry you lost your...

Forget it, nifty.

I was sick of being
a cop anyway.

Now it's up to you.

Not only that, mccarey paid back that $200
to the last guy you sold the bridge to.

- He did that for me, huh?
- Yes.

And like I told ya, he lost his badge
when he refused to close the theater down

because quade said
it was a firetrap.

- Well, is it a firetrap?
- Certainly not.

But if quade clamps down on us,
we might as well hop a freight.

Hm. Guy's drunk with power.

But I'm not gonna let him
get away with it.

I'm gonna take a big chance.

Then you've changed your mind.

You will see him?
You will see him?

I'll do more than see him,
I'll ruin him.

- Get him on the phone.
- Great!

Great! Great!

Oh, the sun is shining brightly
and the birds are singing sweetly

get me the police department.

It's quade, yeah.

Uh, hello there,
hello, inspector.

Oh, I'm calling up
for mademoiselle Fifi.

And thank you
for your beautiful flowers.

- I'd like to send him some.
- She'd like to send you some.

Uh, I mean...

She wants to apologize. You see, inspector,
naturally, she didn't understand

that you were the John quade.

The mademoiselle thinks
that you're a very kind man.

- The rotten kind.
- The rotten kind.

Um, I mean we have a rotten
kind of connection, haven't we?

- Yeah.
- Date.

Uh, is there any suggestion
that you could make

about arranging a meeting
between you two?

- Very exclusive.
- You see, the mademoiselle

is really very particular
who she meets.

Let's, yes, indeed.

There's a lady you have
to handle with kid gloves.

Kid gloves, shoes, stockings, furs,
and a couple lavaliers thrown in.

Well, you just tell mademoiselle Fifi
I'd love to meet her.

Uh-huh.

Oh, somebody is trying
to close your theater?

Oh, now ain't that too bad.

Oh, yeah, I guess I can do
something about it,

but of course, we'll talk about that
after I've met mademoiselle Fifi.

Sure. Sure, Bailey. Goodbye.

Heh, shows you
what a little salve can do.

Yes, it don't mean a thing
if you don't pull a string.

- Well, here we are.
- Just like going into a lion's den.

Oh, mademoiselle Fifi,
the inspector is expecting you!

Mr. quade! Mr. quade, she's here,
mademoiselle Fifi is here!

Ah, inspector quade,
I want you to meet mademoiselle Fifi.

Mademoiselle,
this is sure a great honor.

Mm-hm.

Monsieur.

Oh, take the baby for a walk,
give him some air.

- Take some yourself.
- Oui, oui, mademoiselle, oui, oui.

Come on, boy.

And who are these men?

Oh, these are members
of the squad.

Boys, we have the pleasure
of a visit from mademoiselle Fifi.

Mm, two is company,
a crowd is too much.

Oh, sure, I get you.

Well, right into my private office,
mademoiselle.

Well, make yourself comfortable,
mademoiselle, sit down.

I will sit down after I have
finished standing.

I'll send one of the boys out
for some champagne.

Oh, send all the boys,
send them all.

- Oh, sure.
- Send them all.

You can all go and get
some champagne.

Champagne? Oh.

Looks like the boss is going
for her hook, line, and sinker.

You know, mademoiselle, I didn't think
you liked me very much at first.

Mm, sometimes I make mistake.

I like you better every minute.

Well, I sure fell for you
when I saw your show last night.

Oh, my show. What is to become
of my beautiful show

if they close up my theater?

Nobody is gonna
close up your theater.

Oh, but somebody is trying to.

You will not let them, yes?

Yeah, sure... I mean no, I won'[,
and what I say around here goes.

I'm boss. You know
what that means?

- I make 'em and break 'em.
- Ah, you are head man, yes?

Sure. And you know,
this next election, I'm running for mayor.

Wow, you are a very smart man.

Brilliant man.

Mm, I like you very much.

Oh, mademoiselle.

How dare you! How dare you
come into my boudoir...

I mean this room,
without knocking!

Why, I didn't know,
I just thought possibly that...

Who is this man?
I do not like him. Kick him out.

Mademoiselle, it's just a mistake.
You see, he didn't mean to come in...

Kick him out! Kick him out!

Wait a minute, quade, you're not
gonna stand there and let her...

He will stand
wherever I put him!

Mademoiselle, you see,
I can't... he's a friend of mine.

He's the deputy fire marshal.

Ah! So you are the fireman.

So you are the crook
that makes to close up my theater.

Why, you snake
in the grass, get out!

Oh, , you big cochon!

This is assault and battery,
I'm calling the police!

Police”? What do you think I am,
a pekingese?

Listen, get out of here,
I'll tell you about it later.

I'll be back in a minute,
mademoiselle.

Mm, honest John quade.

He's so crooked, he uses
a corkscrew for a ruler.

I was so lonesome.

Well, you'll feel better after you've had
a couple glasses of this champagne.

Ah, you are so thoughtful,
and I am so bad.

My terrible, terrible temper, bad.

Oh, forget it. Why, I was
gonna can him anyhow

after I got to be mayor.

And, now, suppose we drink

to our future happiness,
mademoiselle.

Do not call me mademoiselle.

Call me Fifi, hm?

Fifi. And... and you call me John.

Mm, Johnny, ah.

1895? Wow, this horrible,
horrible vinegar!

Oh, how can you do this to me?

Do you not know
that I am delicate?

Oh, now, mademoiselle,
I didn't mean...

Do not touch me, I go home.
I come never!

Mademoiselle, please,
don't be so temperamental.

- Why, it breaks me all up.
- What do you think it do to me, huh?

I love you when you're full
of emotion and fire like that.

Oh, my emotions,
they are my art.

Always they have say about me.

Mademoiselle Fifi
is a great emotional artiste!

- Gosh, I guess they're right.
- That's right.

Oh, how I remember that divine night in
Paris at the national theater for the...

- Where?
- Do not interrupt.

Oh, the king of prussia
was sitting in the royal box.

The theater was packed
like sardine!

- Gosh.
- Oh, quiet.

And, then, when I play
my great emotional scene,

you could hear the pin drop.

- Did the king like it?
- Like it?

Oh, he liked it so much
he cracked the blood vessel!

Gosh, you're as good
as grand opera.

- Better!
- Oh, I crave to hold you in my arms.

I crave to kiss you,
I crave to...

Oh, the crave man, oh.

I was grandiose, magnifique,
merveilleux,

and the crowds, they cheer
and cheer and cheer

until the curtain come down!

Ah, take it away, take it away,
take it away.

Ah, now, now I will go
to my beautiful automobile.

Come, come, come, come.

My gorgeous public
is waiting for me!

Au revoir. Goodbye, goodbye!

Au revoir!

- Who is it?
- It's me, mccarey.

Oh, come in.

- Oh, bonsoir, monsieur.
- Good evening.

C'est bon?

- Sit down...
- Thank you.

- While I take off something.
- Huh?

- Mm, just the bracelet.
- Oh.

I send for you because I am so unhappy
you lose your job helping me.

Ah, forget it. The show is going on,
that's the main thing.

Ah, the show, but that was easy.

Today, I go to
monsieur quade's office

and I twist him
around my little finger.

I am much too clever
for him, huh?

That's because you're French,
very clever race.

Oh, do not flatter me.

- Do you mind if I smoke?
- No, no, I'm not a bit narrow-minded.

In Europe,
all the fashionable ladies smoke.

Yeah, I've seen girls smoke
over here too.

Places like trigger Mike's.

Ah, trigger Mike's, huh?

I don't suppose you ever heard
of such a place.

Sound very interesting.

It's a point of interest
for some people.

You know, you make
very good politician.

- Yeah?
- You talk so much, but say nothing.

What do you mean, mademoiselle?

What do you think I mean, huh?

You're a hard woman
to figure out.

I guess that's why I've been thinking
about you since the first time I saw you.

Ah, then you like the dark hair
French woman of mystery, huh?

I'd be just as crazy about you
if you was a blonde.

That is, I mean, I'm impartial to a blonde
up to now.

- I'm only sorry I wasted so much time.
- What do you mean you waste time?

Well, if I'd known when your boat was getting
into New York, I'd have been there to meet you.

Oh, that is a great American custom,
to go to the boat when one leaves

and to meet the boat
when one arrives.

Yeah, especially when you're interested
in the person who's coming or going.

Ah, I think it's getting
much too warm in here.

Why don't you admit the truth,
why you sent for me tonight?

Why you think
I send for you, huh?

Well...

This is a pretty picture.

How dare you enter this room
without knocking!

How dare you come in here
without engraved invitation?

Nobody comes in here unless
mademoiselle Fifi sent for him!

- Yeah, did you send for him?
- Sure, she sent for me. So what?

- I'm talking to her.
- Then talk polite.

Now, listen, don't you tell me
how to talk, mccarey!

- It's time somebody did.
- You Lily-livered flatfoot.

Stop this before
I forget who I am!

Now get this, Fifi, and get it straight. I don't know
how he got in here, but he ain't coming in here again!

Ah, nobody tell mademoiselle Fifi
what to do!

Well, I do! I'm boss around here,
and you do what I tell ya

or I'll close this theater tonight!
Now you hear me?

Oh, you big phony!

This show will be running
while you're panhandling the barmaid.

Say, who are you?

Oh, you know me,
take a good look.

We've had dealings before.

So...

Mademoiselle Fifi
is peaches o'day, huh?

And there's nothing
you can do about it.

Oh, no? Well, there's this
I can do about it.

I can call the black Maria
and book your sweetheart here

on a charge of impersonation
with intent to deceive.

That ain't a crime,
that's just good showmanship.

- Then make it grand larceny.
- Got a warrant with ya?

A warrant. Say, listen, I got enough
evidence in my office to hang her.

You did have, but a little match
sent it up in smoke.

Say, you two are crazy
if you think you can get away with this!

Oh, monsieur mccarey,
I do not like this man, kick him out.

- Kick him out!
- Hey, listen! Let go of that arm!

Have there been fisticuffs?

Mccarey, you're wonderful!
You certainly fixed that.

Yes, mccarey, you certainly
fixed everything up fine.

When quade is elected mayor,
you'll be in a messenger boy's uniform

and peaches will be back in Boston
fighting the battle of bunker hill again.

- That is, if he's mayor.
- I thought we decided quade must not be mayor.

- Quade"s election is practically in the bag.
- Well, I got a couple of tricks in the bag myself.

- May I suggest you pull them out?
- Boys,

here's your next mayor
of New York City.

- Pleased to meet you, mayor.
- Sit down, he's not elected yet.

- No, but he's gonna be.
- Who are his constituents?

Why, he was born and bred
on the sidewalks of New York.

Why, he's so honest,
I'm ashamed of myself.

I'm afraid those are not the qualifications
of the leader of our city government.

Who said they ain't?

I've been a cop for 15 years.

You get to know about civic government
pounding the pavements on the bowery,

fifth Avenue,
and Delancey street.

All you have to know is that everybody's
got to get a job, a place to sleep,

- something to eat, and...
- Diamond tiara.

Hear, hear. He said just what the reform
committee has been saying for months.

- Well, then make him your candidate.
- Well, sure,

but I'll have to ask
the other gentlemen.

Don't ask 'em, tell 'em.

How are you gonna sell
a copper to the voters?

Why, that's a cinch.

We'll put on a campaign
that the city has never seen before.

- You know every actor in town.
- I sure do.

We'll put a show on that'll make
barnum and Bailey look like a flea circus.

After that, they'll have
to take him, or else.

Now listen, boys,
here's the idea. Come here.

I'll tell ya what
we're gonna do.

We're gonna turn around...

Why, here comes peaches.

Hiya, boy!

Miss peaches, can you use me
in your show?

- Hey, he's good.
- Yeah,

he can juggle the votes for us
up in the Bronx.

Here comes peaches!

Welcome, folks!
We owe this show to peaches o'day.

Now tell me,
how did you like it?

Don't forget the big rally
at Madison square.

Be there! What's wrong with...

Mccarey?

Thanks, folks, thanks.

Peaches has done her part,
I hope you do yours,

I want to do mine,
so free beer for everybody!

Vote for mccarey,
he'll work so hard and long

props to the copper,
he can't go wrong

vote for mccarey,
we'll tag along

vote for mccarey,
he'll work so hard and long

props to the copper,
he can't go wrong

- You ain't doing so good.
- Shut up, I'm trying to think.

- Look at that.
- What can I serve you, please?

- Nothin'.
- "Seven district leaders quit quade for mccarey"?

Boys, mccarey has got to go.

- Where?
- You mean I can really take care of him?

Well, I don't have to draw
pictures for you, do 1?

Maybe I do.
Listen, mccarey ain't gonna show up

at Madison square tomorrow night.

Oh, yes, he is,
boss, it says so.

- How are we gonna stop him?
- I don't want to know how you stop him,

but you stop him.

Are you sure Mr. mccarey ain't here?

Listen, I ain't got him
up my sleeve.

- Now, Mr. doffendofeir.
- No, no, my name is krausmeyer.

Will you please roll your alphabet
somewhere else?

Look, I'm busy trying
to elect a mayor.

That's just it,
that is precisely it.

You ain't going to elect nobody,
not if Mr. mccarey ain't.

- Ain't what?
- Ain't ain't.

Say, your brain is stubborn.
Now what are you trying to tell me?

You see, Mr. quade is going to have
Mr. mccarey killed, dead, murdered.

- Who's gonna do it?
- A couple of quade's loafers.

One of them is called
Danny the dope.

- Oh, you mean Danny the dip.
- That's him.

Ah, thanks, you're on
the city payroll already.

Now, look, leave me because I got
a lot of two and twos to put together.

All right, Charlie, goodbye.
Goodbye, Charlie.

- Fritz is the name.
- Yeah, goodbye, goodbye.

Boys, I knew it was coming.
Quade is out to get mccarey.

- You mean they mean to kill him?
- Why, this is terrible!

- It's bad.
- I got to get the lowdown on it.

- You want us to go with ya?
- Not where I'm going.

What are we going to do?

Yes, what are we going to do?

We've got to put him some place
where he'll be safe.

We must get him out of town.

We might forcibly abduct him?

Now, listen, I'm not afraid of quade
or anyone else, and I won't hide out.

Oh, but you can't risk
going out there now.

- Oh, don't be rash, young man!
- Sorry, boys, but I got to get out of here.

Of course he's a busy man,
but you've time for one drink.

- Yes, one little drink.
- One little drink, Mac.

- Well, just one, but make it fast.
- You know the old saying,

"one more little drink
won't do us any harm."

My boy, you're set to be
the next mayor of New York,

and what New York wants
is the kind of a fellow you will be.

A man who knows his New York.

- From the battery to the Bronx.
- Yes, sir.

- To the new mayor.
- Oh, thanks, thanks.

- The mayor!
- Gentlemen, to the new mayor of New York City.

- New mayor.
- Thank you, boys.

- Ah.
- Ah.

Ah.

What's happened to him?

- The important thing is the campaign.
- Right, the campaign.

As I was saying, Mr. mccarey,

I want you to know that the Van
doon millions are at your command.

Gentlemen, we are now
going to drink to peaches.

- There you are, sir.
- To peaches.

- To peaches o'day.
- To peaches.

Ah. You know, peaches not only has beauty,
but she has talent, she has...

There must be something wrong
with this whiskey.

Whiskey? Nonsense,
there's nothing wrong with this whiskey.

Why, as a boy, I used to drink
a toddy every morning.

And, then, why,
I used to drink mint juleps.

Now, come, come, here we are.

- To peaches o'day.
- To peaches.

Hap...

Py new year!

That's all right.

- Ain't that convenient?
- Sure is handy. Come on.

What are we going to do?

We're going to elect
the mayor, that's what.

If he don't come back,
I'll be the mayor.

You can't do that,
that's unconstitutional.

Not for my constitution.
I'm a suffragette.

- Oh.
- Ohh.

Why don't you manicure your nails
or something?

What do you think I am, a sissy?

Listen, there's plenty in it for you guys if I
can get to that rally at Madison square tonight.

There's a swell view of it
right from this window.

Jubilee

come and join the jubilee

gather on the run,
quite a lot of fun singing in the sun

oh, jubilee

come and join the jubilee

listen to the band
swinging in the land

everybody stand

once you sing
with a zip and zing,

watch the blues go bing

big raptures ring up to heaven

jubilee

kind of full of joy

mm, Mr. Blue won't be about

music always knocks him out

learn a song that you can shout
and join the jubilee

Vote for mccarey,
best man to do the job

vote for mccarey,
he'll do the job

Vote for mccarey,
he'll work so hard and long

props to the copper,
he can't go wrong

vote for mccarey...

Vote for mccarey,
he'll do the job

Hey! Wait! Wait a minute!

Where is he?

Vote for mccarey,
best man to do the job

vote for mccarey,
he'll do the job

- Now's the time.
- Yes.

Peaches says to let him go now.

We want mccarey!

Believe me, folks, you can't
go wrong with mccarey.

I found that out.

He's just the kind
of a man you want.

At least, he's the kind of a man I want.

I mean for mayor.

Where's mccarey?

Fellow citizens,
mccarey ain't gonna show up,

and I told ya he wouldn't!

He's a four-flusher,
and he's run out on ya!

But I'm here! I ain't afraid
to stand on my record!

All I want is a chance
to prove to you

what I can do for this city!

He don't mean what
he can do the city.

He means how he can do the city.

Nevertheless, it doesn't answer
the question of where is mccarey?

Well, he ain't where
you think he is.

Let's face the facts.

I'm here, mccarey ain't!

And what's more, I'm telling you voters
that if mccarey does show up,

I hope I may be struck
on this very spot!

You'll never hope a better hope!

The winner!

Vote for mccarey

nice work, boys, nice work.

Here's the papers I promised ya.

Thanks, we wouldn't have done this
for nobody but you, miss peaches.

Get out of town and stay out.

Well, it's great to be
with you again.

I didn't think I ever would.
Some of quade's gang kidnapped me.

Yeah, I know,
they were working for me.

- What?
- Yeah.

All together, join the parade!

Vote for mccarey, he'll do the job

vote for mccarey,
he'll do the job