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AVERY: Chapter one
of my presidential memoir.
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Today, my journey begins
to become the youngest,
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00:00:06,792 --> 00:00:10,752
shortest, blondest
female president since Buchanan!
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00:00:10,834 --> 00:00:12,714
( laughs )
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00:00:13,875 --> 00:00:15,165
Always open with a joke.
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00:00:17,166 --> 00:00:19,916
Tomorrow I launch my first
major election campaign,
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as I run for class president.
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What a coincidence!
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00:00:23,834 --> 00:00:27,714
Because tomorrow I start
as your campaign manager.
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00:00:27,792 --> 00:00:29,382
What are the odds?
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00:00:29,959 --> 00:00:31,539
Now, can you give me
a turn on the computer?
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00:00:31,625 --> 00:00:35,455
I have a very important blog
to write as your campaign manager.
13
00:00:35,542 --> 00:00:39,212
Stan, we discussed this.
You're not my campaign manager.
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00:00:39,291 --> 00:00:41,211
Fine, I'm not.
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00:00:41,291 --> 00:00:44,881
STAN: I'm so excited to be
named Avery's campaign manager.
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00:00:45,834 --> 00:00:48,464
Clearly, she needs help with the way
the press is hounding her.
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00:00:48,542 --> 00:00:51,252
-What press?
-They're always watching.
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But they're not always this adorable.
Look at his little camera!
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( theme music playing )
20
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-I got this.
-I got one.
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Thanks you guys.
I can get the rest
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00:01:21,917 --> 00:01:23,707
of the stuff from
the campaign bus myself.
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Avery, it's not a campaign bus,
it's a little red wagon
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pulled by your dog.
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It was either this or make him
my campaign manager.
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00:01:35,417 --> 00:01:37,037
( laughs )
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00:01:39,625 --> 00:01:42,165
So, I can't wait to find
out who my opponent is.
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Who I will graciously mention
in my victory speech
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00:01:44,959 --> 00:01:46,789
before the balloons
drop from the ceiling.
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00:01:47,250 --> 00:01:49,830
Oh, I've always wanted balloons
to drop from the ceiling.
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00:01:50,500 --> 00:01:51,710
Keep blowing, Wyatt!
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Actually, you don't have an opponent.
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Everybody knows you'll win,
so no one's running against you.
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What? This is terrible.
35
00:02:00,834 --> 00:02:03,334
Yes, success just falls
in your lap, how awful.
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00:02:04,417 --> 00:02:07,207
You don't understand.
If I win with no one running against me,
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00:02:07,291 --> 00:02:09,251
the balloons will just seem smug.
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00:02:09,834 --> 00:02:12,134
I didn't say stop blowing, Wyatt!
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Does he do balloon animals?
If he does, my next question is:
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00:02:17,709 --> 00:02:18,959
does he have a girlfriend?
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00:02:20,375 --> 00:02:25,035
Guys, if I run unopposed,
who will I debate? Myself?
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00:02:26,333 --> 00:02:28,003
We need more computers in the library!
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I agree entirely.
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I also think that top is super cute.
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Right back at you about
that top, pretty lady!
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00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:38,210
See? It won't be a real campaign.
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And victory will be meaningless.
48
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Max?
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Would you do me a huge favor,
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and run against me?
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00:02:47,667 --> 00:02:49,287
Max? Why didn't you ask me?
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You always said you'd
never run for election
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because you didn't want
to throw your hat in the ring.
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00:02:52,917 --> 00:02:54,667
That expression has always bothered me.
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Besides, you might care if you lost,
I know Max won't care.
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She's right.
I don't care. I'll do it.
57
00:03:02,792 --> 00:03:06,462
In fact, my campaign slogan will be:
"One student, one voice."
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Kidding. It's "I don't care."
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00:03:10,208 --> 00:03:11,628
Max, that's perfect.
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Oh, a heart balloon with a note attached.
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"Help me."
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Nice try, Wyatt.
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00:03:21,333 --> 00:03:22,423
( balloon popping )
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Back to work.
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00:03:29,750 --> 00:03:32,540
-I'm home.
-ALL: Hey, buddy!
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00:03:32,625 --> 00:03:35,625
-Good to have you back.
-The BMX tour was awesome.
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I got something for everybody.
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Chloe? This is a medal that I won.
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00:03:40,375 --> 00:03:41,375
Awesome!
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00:03:41,458 --> 00:03:44,248
Dad, here's a team hat.
And Mom, just for you...
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00:03:44,333 --> 00:03:45,293
Oh, it is so sweet.
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Three bags of mud-stained laundry.
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00:03:48,834 --> 00:03:50,174
You left with one bag of clothes.
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00:03:50,250 --> 00:03:52,830
Ellis and Skidmark needed
their clothes washed, too.
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00:03:52,917 --> 00:03:56,167
Skidmark's not his real name,
it's Samuel K. Wydmark.
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00:03:56,875 --> 00:03:58,075
Plus, he's a lazy wiper.
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00:04:00,250 --> 00:04:02,460
Tyler, I've missed you so much.
78
00:04:02,542 --> 00:04:04,082
You're gone every few days now.
79
00:04:04,166 --> 00:04:07,286
And every few days, the house is quiet,
80
00:04:07,375 --> 00:04:10,785
clean, and doesn't smell like
tropical breeze body spray.
81
00:04:10,875 --> 00:04:12,375
I wonder if there's a connection.
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00:04:16,166 --> 00:04:16,996
Check this out.
83
00:04:17,083 --> 00:04:20,173
On the tour, I learned how to make
chocolate milk in my mouth.
84
00:04:26,667 --> 00:04:27,667
( gargles )
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00:04:29,542 --> 00:04:30,712
For you, Mom.
86
00:04:32,208 --> 00:04:33,998
My buddy Red makes them for all the guys.
87
00:04:35,041 --> 00:04:36,131
This is disgusting.
88
00:04:36,667 --> 00:04:37,957
And it's not even a full cup!
89
00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:41,500
I'm sorry you didn't
get anything good, Mommy.
90
00:04:41,583 --> 00:04:44,963
I would give you my medal,
but then I wouldn't have it.
91
00:04:45,417 --> 00:04:46,577
You understand!
92
00:04:49,041 --> 00:04:51,581
Okay, Tyler, you're going
to help me wash these clothes.
93
00:04:51,667 --> 00:04:53,787
And you're also going to get me
something nicer than laundry
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00:04:53,875 --> 00:04:55,205
and mouth milk.
95
00:04:56,542 --> 00:04:58,132
Did you even put your bike away,
96
00:04:58,208 --> 00:05:00,168
or did you just leave it
lying in the driveway again?
97
00:05:00,250 --> 00:05:02,170
Before you left, your mother
almost backed over it.
98
00:05:02,250 --> 00:05:04,290
Yes, and I would have
if it wasn't for a man
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00:05:04,375 --> 00:05:05,495
calling out, "Stop!"
100
00:05:05,792 --> 00:05:06,962
Strange I didn't see the man
101
00:05:07,041 --> 00:05:08,501
it was just Stan
in the rear-view mirror.
102
00:05:09,625 --> 00:05:12,075
Guys, I'm a responsible adult now,
103
00:05:12,166 --> 00:05:14,206
I'd never let something happen to my bike.
104
00:05:14,959 --> 00:05:16,379
Something happened to my bike!
105
00:05:17,542 --> 00:05:18,462
What do you mean?
106
00:05:18,583 --> 00:05:20,003
It's gone, someone must have stolen it.
107
00:05:20,083 --> 00:05:22,883
I didn't steal it, I only borrowed it.
108
00:05:22,959 --> 00:05:24,079
You borrowed my bike?
109
00:05:24,166 --> 00:05:26,456
No! Your tropical wind body spray.
110
00:05:26,792 --> 00:05:27,832
What happened to your bike?
111
00:05:32,500 --> 00:05:35,540
Max, everyone is wearing
your "I don't care" slogan.
112
00:05:35,625 --> 00:05:36,495
What's going on?
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00:05:36,583 --> 00:05:38,083
I thought you didn't care
about the election?
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00:05:38,166 --> 00:05:39,286
I don't care.
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00:05:39,375 --> 00:05:41,625
STUDENTS: I don't care!
I don't care!
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I don't care!
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00:05:43,208 --> 00:05:45,208
I've tapped into a deep vein of "meh."
118
00:05:46,709 --> 00:05:48,209
Well, why aren't you wearing a button?
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I don't care.
120
00:05:51,750 --> 00:05:53,130
Hey, everybody!
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00:05:53,208 --> 00:05:55,998
If you do want something
to care about,
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why don't you vote for...
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00:05:58,583 --> 00:06:01,463
a very good candidate?
( laughs )
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00:06:02,875 --> 00:06:06,875
A very, Avery. A very, Avery.
125
00:06:06,959 --> 00:06:08,249
See, it's a pun on my name.
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00:06:08,333 --> 00:06:10,793
Oh, that's good.
It's complicated without being funny.
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00:06:12,792 --> 00:06:14,542
ALL: I don't care!
I don't care!
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00:06:15,041 --> 00:06:17,421
ALL: I don't care!
I don't care!
129
00:06:17,500 --> 00:06:19,750
Max's campaign is really catching on.
130
00:06:20,250 --> 00:06:21,460
What if I lose?
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00:06:21,792 --> 00:06:23,922
Look, all the different cliques
are gathered around her:
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00:06:24,000 --> 00:06:26,420
The jocks, the nerds, the theater kids.
133
00:06:26,500 --> 00:06:28,380
Even the group of guys
who dress up like unicorns.
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00:06:28,458 --> 00:06:30,078
ALL: ( neighing )
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00:06:31,834 --> 00:06:35,044
How did she become so popular
with the Dude-icorns?
136
00:06:36,083 --> 00:06:39,423
They're the school's most elusive
and mythical voters.
137
00:06:44,375 --> 00:06:46,575
My election polls are a little imprecise,
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00:06:46,667 --> 00:06:49,707
but they indicate that you're losing
to Max by 10%.
139
00:06:49,792 --> 00:06:54,002
Or maybe 30%.
Or maybe winning by 10%.
140
00:06:54,083 --> 00:06:55,883
I did say they were a little imprecise.
141
00:06:57,500 --> 00:06:59,960
Stan, you're not my campaign manager.
142
00:07:00,041 --> 00:07:02,711
Which is why you're behind in the polls!
143
00:07:03,166 --> 00:07:04,286
Unless you're really ahead.
144
00:07:05,709 --> 00:07:08,999
I just don't see how some joke campaign
about not caring
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00:07:09,083 --> 00:07:12,963
could be beating my very serious campaign
about wanting to improve the school.
146
00:07:13,041 --> 00:07:15,791
Don't worry, I'm on it.
I have time now.
147
00:07:15,875 --> 00:07:18,785
My wife Princess is on
the road doing dog shows.
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00:07:18,875 --> 00:07:22,075
We're America's number one
canine power couple.
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00:07:22,166 --> 00:07:24,286
They're calling us Stan-cess.
150
00:07:26,125 --> 00:07:27,125
Whose calling you that?
151
00:07:27,208 --> 00:07:28,578
Well, so far just me and Robert.
152
00:07:28,667 --> 00:07:30,077
But that's how things get started.
153
00:07:30,166 --> 00:07:32,576
We're also bring back harem pants.
154
00:07:35,625 --> 00:07:41,075
Anywho, I've made a campaign video
that will turn the tide for you.
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00:07:41,166 --> 00:07:43,706
STAN: Max's slogan is, "I don't care."
156
00:07:43,792 --> 00:07:46,382
You know who else doesn't care? Cats.
157
00:07:48,250 --> 00:07:50,880
That's right, Max is a cat.
158
00:07:52,333 --> 00:07:53,713
She goes potty in sand.
159
00:07:53,792 --> 00:07:55,792
Don't invite her to your beach party.
160
00:07:57,208 --> 00:08:00,708
She plays with yarn.
Oh, that's really cute.
161
00:08:01,125 --> 00:08:02,125
Or is it?
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00:08:03,834 --> 00:08:07,084
Eww! She's got fleas.
163
00:08:08,875 --> 00:08:11,415
Do you really want
your next president to be...
164
00:08:12,625 --> 00:08:14,075
( Stan narrating )
165
00:08:19,792 --> 00:08:20,922
( imitating Avery's voice )
166
00:08:22,542 --> 00:08:23,462
( in normal voice )
167
00:08:26,166 --> 00:08:29,036
Let's put aside for a moment
that that video is crazy.
168
00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:32,250
I am not going to run
a negative campaign.
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00:08:32,333 --> 00:08:33,543
Max is my friend.
170
00:08:33,625 --> 00:08:36,075
The only reason she's running
is because I asked her to.
171
00:08:36,166 --> 00:08:38,246
Then you should ask her to drop out.
172
00:08:38,333 --> 00:08:40,213
That's actually a good idea.
173
00:08:40,291 --> 00:08:42,501
I'm full of good ideas, Avery.
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00:08:42,583 --> 00:08:46,253
Check out the video Robert and I made
to promote our harem pants.
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00:08:46,333 --> 00:08:48,423
STAN: ( humming dance tune )
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00:08:55,792 --> 00:08:58,422
I've looked everywhere
for my bike and nothing.
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00:08:58,834 --> 00:09:00,794
So I'm going to need
to borrow money from you guys
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00:09:00,875 --> 00:09:02,745
so I can get a new bike
before the next competition.
179
00:09:02,834 --> 00:09:05,754
Well, what happened to all the money
you've been making on the BMX circuit?
180
00:09:05,834 --> 00:09:08,334
I swear I didn't waste a penny of it.
181
00:09:09,583 --> 00:09:12,673
No way I'm a waste of money.
182
00:09:14,625 --> 00:09:18,165
This is ridiculous, Tyler,
you have to be more responsible.
183
00:09:18,667 --> 00:09:21,127
Honey, you don't clean up after yourself,
184
00:09:21,208 --> 00:09:23,578
you lose your bike,
and you're wasting your money,
185
00:09:23,667 --> 00:09:25,287
some of which you could have
spent on a present
186
00:09:25,375 --> 00:09:27,455
for your mother
that wasn't made in your mouth.
187
00:09:29,125 --> 00:09:32,495
Come on, Mommy and Daddy,
Tyler's a really great brother.
188
00:09:32,583 --> 00:09:35,583
Everybody makes mistakes.
Haven't you ever lost something
189
00:09:35,667 --> 00:09:38,077
really important and really red-headed
190
00:09:38,166 --> 00:09:40,376
at the mall when she was five?
191
00:09:41,041 --> 00:09:43,081
I was hoping that memory wouldn't take.
192
00:09:43,166 --> 00:09:44,706
Forgive, but never forget.
193
00:09:46,875 --> 00:09:51,415
That's what I say about the man
who put the robot inside of me.
194
00:09:53,500 --> 00:09:56,130
Actually, Tyler,
you could learn from Chloe.
195
00:09:56,208 --> 00:09:59,878
Now she gets a dollar every week
for doing chores and she saves it all.
196
00:10:00,333 --> 00:10:01,753
How much do you have now, sweetheart?
197
00:10:01,834 --> 00:10:03,384
$450.
198
00:10:03,458 --> 00:10:05,168
What? How'd you get that much money?
199
00:10:05,250 --> 00:10:08,130
I sell mice to the pet store
as friends for the snakes.
200
00:10:08,750 --> 00:10:11,880
Oh, sweetie. Snakes eat mice.
201
00:10:11,959 --> 00:10:14,329
Really? I didn't know that.
202
00:10:15,166 --> 00:10:17,706
Well, business is business
and business is booming.
203
00:10:19,458 --> 00:10:22,288
Please, if you loan me
$300 to get a new bike,
204
00:10:22,375 --> 00:10:23,575
I promise I'll pay you back.
205
00:10:23,667 --> 00:10:26,077
Okay, but you have to pay us back
before you spend that money
206
00:10:26,166 --> 00:10:27,376
on anything frivolous.
207
00:10:27,458 --> 00:10:28,958
That's right, Tyler.
208
00:10:29,041 --> 00:10:32,381
No more throwing away money
on stupid things.
209
00:10:32,458 --> 00:10:34,958
( laughs ) This is great!
210
00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:42,830
Hey, Max. I really
appreciate you running,
211
00:10:42,917 --> 00:10:45,127
but I was thinking now would be
a good time for you to bow out.
212
00:10:45,208 --> 00:10:47,628
-Because I'm winning?
-Glad you understand!
213
00:10:48,875 --> 00:10:51,205
No, Avery.
I'm going to be class president.
214
00:10:51,291 --> 00:10:52,921
-I'm not dropping out.
-What?
215
00:10:53,375 --> 00:10:54,825
You don't even care.
216
00:10:55,333 --> 00:10:56,963
Well, true, that's been my life's motto,
217
00:10:57,041 --> 00:11:00,581
but now I'm a high school kid getting
a lot of positive attention from my peers,
218
00:11:00,667 --> 00:11:02,627
so I'm going to ride
that train for a while.
219
00:11:04,500 --> 00:11:07,670
Max, I asked you to run
as a favor, you're my friend.
220
00:11:07,750 --> 00:11:09,420
You should know
how much this means to me.
221
00:11:09,500 --> 00:11:11,080
Well, if our friendship mattered to you,
222
00:11:11,166 --> 00:11:12,666
you'd understand that for the first time,
223
00:11:12,750 --> 00:11:14,130
I'm kind of a big deal.
224
00:11:14,208 --> 00:11:17,878
STUDENTS: I don't care!
I don't care! I don't care!
225
00:11:17,959 --> 00:11:19,129
Yeah, you don't.
226
00:11:25,500 --> 00:11:27,170
Hey, Chloe, I just got a new bike.
227
00:11:27,250 --> 00:11:30,080
Totally customized. Even got a bell.
228
00:11:30,166 --> 00:11:31,376
So, when I'm getting mad air,
229
00:11:31,458 --> 00:11:34,458
I'll be all like, "Phew, bling, bling!"
230
00:11:36,125 --> 00:11:37,495
So, you're going back on tour?
231
00:11:37,583 --> 00:11:40,793
Yeah, and, honestly,
and I don't Mom and Dad
232
00:11:40,875 --> 00:11:43,035
would have lent me the money
if you hadn't stood up for me.
233
00:11:43,250 --> 00:11:44,130
You're a great sister.
234
00:11:44,208 --> 00:11:45,708
Nothing says thank you like a smoothie.
235
00:11:45,792 --> 00:11:46,752
I'll make you one.
236
00:11:47,417 --> 00:11:49,037
Not in your mouth!
237
00:11:50,375 --> 00:11:51,915
I shouldn't have to say that.
238
00:11:59,417 --> 00:12:02,287
Chloe, you sly taco!
239
00:12:11,166 --> 00:12:12,496
Hey, Chloe, come check out my new bike.
240
00:12:12,959 --> 00:12:16,039
Sure, Tyler, that would
be very interesting.
241
00:12:18,458 --> 00:12:19,418
Check this out.
242
00:12:21,291 --> 00:12:22,331
My bike!
243
00:12:22,625 --> 00:12:25,035
Where is my bike?
I just left it here for a second.
244
00:12:25,208 --> 00:12:27,748
Someone took it right out our backyard.
Mom, Dad!
245
00:12:27,834 --> 00:12:30,334
Are you sure it was out here?
246
00:12:33,166 --> 00:12:35,246
You guys, someone stole my bike!
247
00:12:35,333 --> 00:12:37,463
The bike you just bought?
You already lost it?
248
00:12:37,542 --> 00:12:40,082
Don't you remember what the bear said?
249
00:12:40,166 --> 00:12:42,206
You have to be more responsible.
250
00:12:44,333 --> 00:12:46,833
Tyler, we are out $300.
251
00:12:46,917 --> 00:12:51,037
No, now you're out $600 'cause you have
to loan me $300 to get another bike.
252
00:12:51,125 --> 00:12:52,745
Man, this is a nightmare for all of us.
253
00:12:54,625 --> 00:12:58,035
You expect us to buy you another bike
after you just lost two?
254
00:12:58,125 --> 00:12:59,745
Oh, good. You understand.
255
00:12:59,834 --> 00:13:02,004
I thought we were going to have
a whole to-do about this.
256
00:13:02,083 --> 00:13:04,003
I think I'm going to get a blue one next.
257
00:13:04,750 --> 00:13:07,080
We are not going to keep
buying you bikes
258
00:13:07,166 --> 00:13:08,666
if you're going to keep losing them.
259
00:13:08,750 --> 00:13:10,540
Why would we throw good money after bad?
260
00:13:10,625 --> 00:13:13,075
That's the sunk-cost fallacy!
261
00:13:13,375 --> 00:13:16,625
I learned that on a money show
I watch for my mouse business.
262
00:13:16,709 --> 00:13:18,999
It's called Screaming About Stocks
263
00:13:19,083 --> 00:13:22,213
with a guy who screams about stocks!
264
00:13:24,250 --> 00:13:27,330
Look, I'm not losing the bikes,
somebody keeps taking them.
265
00:13:27,417 --> 00:13:30,577
Please, I promise I won't let
this next bike out of my sight.
266
00:13:30,667 --> 00:13:32,207
If anything happens to it,
267
00:13:32,291 --> 00:13:34,881
I'll quit BMX and get
a regular job to pay you back.
268
00:13:34,959 --> 00:13:36,459
What kind of regular job?
269
00:13:36,542 --> 00:13:37,632
Uh...
270
00:13:37,709 --> 00:13:41,379
Try technology!
It's going through the roof!
271
00:13:45,417 --> 00:13:47,787
I can't believe Max
isn't going to drop out!
272
00:13:47,875 --> 00:13:50,535
If she wants a fight,
I'll give her a fight.
273
00:13:50,625 --> 00:13:52,955
A very good fight.
274
00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:54,041
AVERY: ( laughs )
275
00:13:54,542 --> 00:13:58,332
Come on! Avery, a very?
Someone has to get that!
276
00:13:59,667 --> 00:14:01,627
So, if I'm understanding you correctly,
277
00:14:01,709 --> 00:14:04,749
we are going wide
with the Flea-bag Max video.
278
00:14:04,834 --> 00:14:06,134
I already made the plushie.
279
00:14:08,875 --> 00:14:11,165
Stan, why do you keep making plushies?
280
00:14:11,250 --> 00:14:13,330
I'd have thought you learned
your lesson from this.
281
00:14:16,250 --> 00:14:17,080
Or these?
282
00:14:19,250 --> 00:14:22,880
Why don't stores want those?
They're adorable!
283
00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:25,580
And they're not even radioactive
like the first batch.
284
00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:29,710
So, about that cat video?
285
00:14:29,792 --> 00:14:33,212
Stan, the cat video is not a serious
political statement.
286
00:14:33,709 --> 00:14:34,919
It's just a joke.
287
00:14:36,291 --> 00:14:39,671
And a joke is exactly what I need.
288
00:14:39,834 --> 00:14:43,134
Max is running a joke campaign,
and everyone loves it.
289
00:14:43,583 --> 00:14:46,713
If I do show your Flea-bag Max video,
290
00:14:46,792 --> 00:14:49,582
people will think I'm funny
and it will make Max look ridiculous.
291
00:14:50,208 --> 00:14:51,748
And you know what else
will win you votes?
292
00:14:51,834 --> 00:14:53,044
Hand these out:
293
00:14:53,291 --> 00:14:54,751
DOLL: There's the sugar!
294
00:14:54,834 --> 00:14:56,964
You see that? It talks.
295
00:14:57,041 --> 00:14:59,581
It has an electronic
voice box just like me.
296
00:15:00,667 --> 00:15:03,167
Naw, I'm kidding.
I'm a regular talking dog.
297
00:15:09,250 --> 00:15:11,500
Thanks for letting me be part
of your stake-out, Tyler.
298
00:15:11,583 --> 00:15:13,713
-This is pretty cool.
-I just hope we catch the thief.
299
00:15:13,792 --> 00:15:16,832
Mom and Dad will see that
I wasn't just being irresponsible.
300
00:15:16,917 --> 00:15:18,287
At least not the second time.
301
00:15:18,375 --> 00:15:19,995
I'm still not sure about the first bike.
302
00:15:20,208 --> 00:15:21,708
I am pretty irresponsible.
303
00:15:22,917 --> 00:15:24,827
Feel free to take
a nap while I keep watch.
304
00:15:25,667 --> 00:15:27,707
Thanks, but we're out here
for an important reason.
305
00:15:27,792 --> 00:15:30,582
Look what I found stowed away
in a box in the garage.
306
00:15:31,959 --> 00:15:33,249
Blankie!
307
00:15:35,375 --> 00:15:36,745
Oh, Blankie.
308
00:15:47,083 --> 00:15:50,543
No! Chloe wake up! We missed it,
someone stole my bike!
309
00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:54,630
Tyler, how could this happen again?
310
00:15:54,750 --> 00:15:57,380
And again! And again!
311
00:15:59,208 --> 00:16:01,248
Mom and Dad are gonna freak!
312
00:16:01,500 --> 00:16:02,880
Oh, no!
313
00:16:04,250 --> 00:16:06,250
It's okay, I rigged
the bike with blue dye,
314
00:16:06,333 --> 00:16:08,083
so whoever took it
will have blue hands.
315
00:16:13,208 --> 00:16:15,708
Tyler, we will those blue-handed people,
316
00:16:15,792 --> 00:16:17,332
whoever they are.
317
00:16:19,875 --> 00:16:22,325
Chloe, you took my bike?
318
00:16:22,417 --> 00:16:25,667
( laughing )
That is, I mean, are you...
319
00:16:25,917 --> 00:16:28,037
Oh, Tyler. Yes.
320
00:16:30,166 --> 00:16:31,416
They're in my room.
321
00:16:31,500 --> 00:16:33,210
You took my other bikes, too?
322
00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:35,500
Why would you do this to me?
323
00:16:35,583 --> 00:16:37,713
I put my whole BMX career on the line.
324
00:16:38,291 --> 00:16:40,211
I don't want you to do BMX.
325
00:16:40,542 --> 00:16:42,292
You keep leaving all the time.
326
00:16:42,667 --> 00:16:46,287
You're my big brother.
We used to do so much together.
327
00:16:46,583 --> 00:16:50,173
You got my ears pierced.
You taught my how to make mouth milk.
328
00:16:50,458 --> 00:16:52,498
I probably won't use
that one, but I know it.
329
00:16:54,792 --> 00:16:55,792
I miss you.
330
00:17:00,709 --> 00:17:03,579
Chloe. I'm getting to be an adult now,
331
00:17:03,667 --> 00:17:05,247
and I'm chasing my dreams.
332
00:17:06,041 --> 00:17:07,461
And one day, you will, too.
333
00:17:08,625 --> 00:17:10,665
I will always be close.
334
00:17:11,542 --> 00:17:12,882
You're my little sister.
335
00:17:14,333 --> 00:17:15,213
I love you.
336
00:17:16,208 --> 00:17:17,288
I love you, too.
337
00:17:18,083 --> 00:17:19,043
Sorry about your shirt.
338
00:17:22,750 --> 00:17:25,500
Hey, how come Mom didn't find the bikes
when she cleaned your room?
339
00:17:25,959 --> 00:17:27,499
I'm going to vacuum your room.
340
00:17:27,875 --> 00:17:30,375
Okay, let me know if you find
the snake that escaped.
341
00:17:30,458 --> 00:17:32,578
-It's been eating all my mice.
-Maybe later.
342
00:17:32,667 --> 00:17:33,627
Maybe later.
343
00:17:38,792 --> 00:17:40,382
-( laughing )
-COMPUTER: And I approve this message.
344
00:17:40,458 --> 00:17:41,328
Which is also not true.
345
00:17:41,417 --> 00:17:42,537
So, when the debate starts,
346
00:17:42,625 --> 00:17:47,035
I'll queue you and you'll play this
Flea-bag Max video through the projector.
347
00:17:47,125 --> 00:17:49,875
Avery, I can't play that!
I mean, it's hilarious.
348
00:17:49,959 --> 00:17:51,209
She's gonna poop on the beach?
349
00:17:51,291 --> 00:17:52,461
( laughing )
350
00:17:52,542 --> 00:17:54,462
But, it'll humiliate her.
351
00:17:54,542 --> 00:17:56,172
( laughs ) But, it's funny.
352
00:17:56,250 --> 00:17:58,460
Don't you remember what happened
to Timmy Sperlock?
353
00:17:58,542 --> 00:18:00,252
One day he wore
a black and white sweater to school
354
00:18:00,333 --> 00:18:02,083
and now everyone calls him Skunk Boy.
355
00:18:02,166 --> 00:18:03,416
He sits alone at lunch.
356
00:18:03,500 --> 00:18:05,040
Partly because he's a jerk.
357
00:18:05,125 --> 00:18:06,125
Yeah, but still.
358
00:18:08,000 --> 00:18:09,000
Max will be fine.
359
00:18:09,083 --> 00:18:11,133
No, people latch on to one little thing
in high school
360
00:18:11,208 --> 00:18:13,248
and you're stuck with it
for the next four years.
361
00:18:13,333 --> 00:18:15,673
Do you want people
calling her Flea-bag Max?
362
00:18:16,000 --> 00:18:17,170
She's your friend.
363
00:18:18,750 --> 00:18:22,080
She's not my friend.
She's my competitor.
364
00:18:22,834 --> 00:18:23,884
Oh, Avery.
365
00:18:28,917 --> 00:18:29,957
( sighing )
366
00:18:34,166 --> 00:18:35,996
Faculty, fellow students,
367
00:18:36,083 --> 00:18:38,753
and those of you who just
wanted to ditch fifth period...
368
00:18:38,834 --> 00:18:39,924
What? ( laughs )
369
00:18:41,417 --> 00:18:42,787
Always open with a joke.
370
00:18:44,041 --> 00:18:47,581
DOLLS: There's the sugar!
371
00:18:47,667 --> 00:18:50,997
Stan, do not pass those out
in the middle of my speech.
372
00:18:56,208 --> 00:18:58,458
Now, in lieu
of my introductory remarks,
373
00:18:58,542 --> 00:19:00,792
I would like to play this video.
374
00:19:11,500 --> 00:19:12,420
But I can't.
375
00:19:15,583 --> 00:19:18,503
I decided to run for office
to start on my path
376
00:19:18,583 --> 00:19:21,253
to helping people
and making a difference.
377
00:19:22,166 --> 00:19:24,666
But I almost did something
really horrible.
378
00:19:25,333 --> 00:19:28,423
I wanted to win the election
so much that I lost myself,
379
00:19:29,250 --> 00:19:31,830
and I almost lost my friend.
380
00:19:33,792 --> 00:19:38,172
Max, I am so, so, sorry
that I asked you to drop out.
381
00:19:38,667 --> 00:19:40,377
You have as much right to run as I do.
382
00:19:43,625 --> 00:19:44,875
Fellow students.
383
00:19:45,750 --> 00:19:48,790
ALL: I don't care!
I don't care!
384
00:19:51,250 --> 00:19:54,290
I have a confession to make.
I do care.
385
00:19:54,375 --> 00:19:55,955
( gasping )
386
00:19:57,750 --> 00:19:59,290
I care about Avery.
387
00:20:00,375 --> 00:20:01,995
I am so sorry, Avery.
388
00:20:02,250 --> 00:20:03,580
You asked me to do you a favor
389
00:20:03,667 --> 00:20:06,077
and I got so carried away
with the attention.
390
00:20:07,166 --> 00:20:11,456
I mean, I am an honorary
Dude-icorn now. How cool is that?
391
00:20:13,583 --> 00:20:17,003
But the point is,
I lost sight of what's important.
392
00:20:17,375 --> 00:20:18,415
Your friendship.
393
00:20:23,667 --> 00:20:25,327
I don't even want to vote against you.
394
00:20:25,417 --> 00:20:27,127
So, I'm just not going to vote.
395
00:20:27,208 --> 00:20:29,328
I'm not going to vote against you either.
396
00:20:32,333 --> 00:20:33,883
Hey, where'd everybody go?
397
00:20:34,333 --> 00:20:36,673
They got bored by your long,
mushy speeches and left.
398
00:20:39,375 --> 00:20:41,995
-So, nobody voted?
-Well, I did.
399
00:20:42,083 --> 00:20:43,333
You're the only vote?
400
00:20:43,417 --> 00:20:44,787
I didn't know that at the time.
401
00:20:44,875 --> 00:20:45,745
Who'd you vote for?
402
00:20:45,834 --> 00:20:47,294
I couldn't choose between you two,
403
00:20:47,375 --> 00:20:48,625
so I just wrote in my name.
404
00:20:48,709 --> 00:20:50,749
BOTH: You're the class president?
405
00:20:52,542 --> 00:20:53,752
I guess so.
406
00:20:53,834 --> 00:20:55,004
I don't how to be president,
407
00:20:55,083 --> 00:20:56,963
but I will take it
seriously and work really...
408
00:20:57,583 --> 00:20:59,083
Oh, balloons!
409
00:21:03,959 --> 00:21:05,669
I guess we get
the government we deserve.
410
00:21:05,750 --> 00:21:06,710
Yeah.
411
00:21:08,291 --> 00:21:10,291
AVERY: Losing this election
makes for a great
412
00:21:10,375 --> 00:21:11,915
first chapter in my memoir,
413
00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:15,130
since I learned the important lesson
that what kind of person you are
414
00:21:15,208 --> 00:21:16,538
matters more than winning.
415
00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:19,710
I also learned
that I look great in harem pants.
416
00:21:22,875 --> 00:21:24,995
And... ( singing )
417
00:21:28,792 --> 00:21:29,962
( singing stops )
418
00:21:31,083 --> 00:21:34,043
STAN: So, I finally sold
my first pair of harem pants.
419
00:21:35,291 --> 00:21:39,131
And my stint as a campaign manager
was a huge success.
420
00:21:39,208 --> 00:21:41,628
We only lost by one vote.
421
00:21:44,667 --> 00:21:47,287
Chloe, it is not okay to steal.
422
00:21:47,375 --> 00:21:49,495
Even if you are doing it out of love.
423
00:21:49,583 --> 00:21:51,833
Tyler can't return those
new custom bikes,
424
00:21:51,917 --> 00:21:54,037
so you're going to have
to pay for them out of your mouse money.
425
00:21:54,125 --> 00:21:55,915
It's not just mice, anymore.
426
00:21:56,000 --> 00:21:59,670
I'm expanding my business.
I've got lizards, spiders,
427
00:21:59,750 --> 00:22:01,040
and one turkey vulture.
428
00:22:01,667 --> 00:22:03,537
I really got to shut my window at night.
429
00:22:05,500 --> 00:22:07,670
I am never vacuuming your room again.
430
00:22:09,208 --> 00:22:11,918
You know what?
Chloe's been a really good sister.
431
00:22:12,667 --> 00:22:13,667
I'm paying for half of it.
432
00:22:13,750 --> 00:22:15,420
Where are you getting the money, Tyler?
433
00:22:15,500 --> 00:22:18,000
Well, I decided to sell
my animatronic bear.
434
00:22:18,083 --> 00:22:19,253
Who'd you sell it to?
435
00:22:19,875 --> 00:22:22,575
Hello, there, Stan, how are you?
436
00:22:23,291 --> 00:22:24,501
( laughs )
437
00:22:25,125 --> 00:22:27,535
Why are talking animals so funny?
438
00:22:27,625 --> 00:22:29,325
( laughing )
33417
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