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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:05,130 Welcome to the first meeting of Stan's Book Club. 2 00:00:05,208 --> 00:00:07,078 Today's book is Moby Dick. 3 00:00:07,792 --> 00:00:10,292 I had a whale of a time reading it. 4 00:00:12,208 --> 00:00:14,038 That's what you do in book clubs, right? 5 00:00:14,125 --> 00:00:15,785 Make terrible puns about the book? 6 00:00:15,875 --> 00:00:19,825 I can't wait till next week when we'd read The Wizard of Paws. 7 00:00:19,917 --> 00:00:21,747 Ah? Ah? 8 00:00:23,375 --> 00:00:26,125 Stan, you didn't tell me Karl would be here. 9 00:00:26,625 --> 00:00:28,205 I thought it would just be the two of us. 10 00:00:28,291 --> 00:00:31,831 Likewise. And I also didn't think we'd actually be discussing the book. 11 00:00:31,917 --> 00:00:34,077 Book clubs are just for gossip. 12 00:00:34,166 --> 00:00:35,576 Guess which neighborhood teen 13 00:00:35,667 --> 00:00:37,627 has been consuming his mother's strength-training shakes 14 00:00:37,709 --> 00:00:39,749 and can now bench press his own weight, 15 00:00:39,834 --> 00:00:41,424 from when he was seven? 16 00:00:42,375 --> 00:00:44,745 I know I didn't tell you each the other would be here. 17 00:00:44,834 --> 00:00:48,384 But I want you guys to get along because you're two of the only people 18 00:00:48,458 --> 00:00:49,918 who know I can talk. 19 00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:51,880 And you have so much in common. 20 00:00:51,959 --> 00:00:54,289 You're smart, you love literature, 21 00:00:54,375 --> 00:00:56,495 and you both fart a little when you're tickled. 22 00:00:56,583 --> 00:00:57,503 Come here. 23 00:00:57,583 --> 00:00:58,753 Both: No! 24 00:01:00,333 --> 00:01:02,833 Oh, wait. I'm the tickle farter. Tickle me! 25 00:01:02,917 --> 00:01:04,077 Both: No! 26 00:01:05,667 --> 00:01:08,497 Stan, this whole thing is misguided. 27 00:01:08,583 --> 00:01:10,673 We have nothing in common. 28 00:01:10,750 --> 00:01:14,630 Karl is a pompous buffoon who names his sweater vests after Greek gods. 29 00:01:14,709 --> 00:01:17,999 Demigods. Only full sweaters are named after gods. 30 00:01:18,625 --> 00:01:21,245 She's insufferable, isn't she, Perseus? 31 00:01:22,250 --> 00:01:24,130 We have nothing in common. 32 00:01:24,208 --> 00:01:26,878 Nothing in common? How can you say that? 33 00:01:26,959 --> 00:01:28,919 You're in the same book club! 34 00:01:30,542 --> 00:01:34,172 As much as I like you, Stan, this book club is officially a bust. 35 00:01:34,250 --> 00:01:36,290 I'm going to go withdraw to my sanctuary. 36 00:01:36,959 --> 00:01:39,039 I'm sorry, Stan, but I'm leaving, too. 37 00:01:39,709 --> 00:01:41,669 Oh, and, Karl, here's a tip. 38 00:01:41,750 --> 00:01:45,290 If your "sanctuary" has mulch and shovels, 39 00:01:45,375 --> 00:01:47,285 it's probably more of a shed. 40 00:01:48,500 --> 00:01:51,040 You say "potato," I say "pommes aligot." 41 00:01:51,125 --> 00:01:53,705 Because you're common and I enjoy French cuisine. 42 00:01:54,667 --> 00:01:55,667 ( scoffs ) 43 00:01:56,750 --> 00:01:59,000 Well, I guess it's just you and me, Robert. 44 00:02:01,375 --> 00:02:02,915 So what did you think of the book? 45 00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:04,380 You did read it, didn't you? 46 00:02:04,458 --> 00:02:06,918 What? The audiobook? 47 00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:09,080 Robert, that's abridged! 48 00:02:11,458 --> 00:02:14,128 Stan: So we never did get to discuss Moby Dick. 49 00:02:15,333 --> 00:02:17,043 [reading] 50 00:02:20,834 --> 00:02:22,834 ( theme music playing ) 51 00:02:39,000 --> 00:02:41,330 Tyler, don't snack. You'll ruin your appetite for dinner. 52 00:02:41,417 --> 00:02:42,497 Bennett, back me up here. 53 00:02:46,792 --> 00:02:48,252 Listen to your mother. 54 00:02:50,792 --> 00:02:52,212 I want to quit dance. 55 00:02:52,291 --> 00:02:53,381 What do you mean? 56 00:02:53,458 --> 00:02:55,668 Your big recital's coming up in a few days. 57 00:02:55,750 --> 00:02:57,710 You mean, I'm not gonna get to sit through three hours 58 00:02:57,792 --> 00:03:01,332 of other kids dancing just to see your two minute routine? 59 00:03:01,417 --> 00:03:02,917 Well, you gave it your best shot. 60 00:03:03,667 --> 00:03:06,247 No, no, Bennett. Chloe can't quit dance now. 61 00:03:06,333 --> 00:03:08,003 I don't like dance anymore. 62 00:03:08,083 --> 00:03:09,923 I want to quit and learn to do some awesome 63 00:03:10,000 --> 00:03:11,420 BMX bike tricks like Tyler. 64 00:03:11,500 --> 00:03:13,210 Chloe, all right. 65 00:03:13,291 --> 00:03:15,331 You're gonna look so cool all scarred up. 66 00:03:17,333 --> 00:03:18,793 Tyler, don't encourage her. 67 00:03:18,875 --> 00:03:21,205 Fine, I'll never encourage my little sister again. 68 00:03:21,291 --> 00:03:23,461 I was hoping we'd be close. But that's on you. 69 00:03:24,750 --> 00:03:27,580 Chloe, you can't quit dance three days before the big recital. 70 00:03:28,041 --> 00:03:29,381 Back me up here, Bennett. 71 00:03:29,917 --> 00:03:30,877 Well-- 72 00:03:32,959 --> 00:03:34,879 ( seeds clattering ) 73 00:04:12,667 --> 00:04:13,877 Sweetie, come here. 74 00:04:13,959 --> 00:04:16,459 Listen, we've already paid for the classes, 75 00:04:16,542 --> 00:04:19,832 the costumes, the recital tickets, pre-ordered the DVD. 76 00:04:19,917 --> 00:04:23,077 -You got to finish what you start. -Mommy quit that cooking class. 77 00:04:23,166 --> 00:04:25,496 And if you start a grease fire while dancing, 78 00:04:25,583 --> 00:04:26,673 you can quit, too. 79 00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:29,670 You never let me do anything. 80 00:04:29,750 --> 00:04:32,420 You said I can't do BMX, you said I can't be a lion tamer 81 00:04:32,500 --> 00:04:33,880 at the circus when I grow up. 82 00:04:33,959 --> 00:04:36,499 Lion tamer is even more dangerous than BMX. 83 00:04:36,583 --> 00:04:38,173 I've thought it all out, Mommy. 84 00:04:38,250 --> 00:04:39,920 If things go bad with the lion, 85 00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:42,170 I'll just push a clown in front of me and run. 86 00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:45,500 You can't outrun a lion. 87 00:04:45,583 --> 00:04:48,503 I don't have to outrun a lion, I just have to outrun the clown. 88 00:04:52,583 --> 00:04:54,293 Go and get it. (laughs) 89 00:04:54,375 --> 00:04:55,875 Knockedy-knockedy. 90 00:04:55,959 --> 00:04:57,419 What do you want, Karl? 91 00:04:58,333 --> 00:05:01,753 I came to apologize for being so irascible at the book club. 92 00:05:01,834 --> 00:05:04,044 The truth is, I respect you a great deal. 93 00:05:04,125 --> 00:05:06,325 I don't know why we so often butt heads. 94 00:05:06,417 --> 00:05:07,707 I respect you, too. 95 00:05:07,792 --> 00:05:09,882 Mainly because we're the only two kids I know 96 00:05:09,959 --> 00:05:11,749 who wouldn't make some juvenile joke off the fact 97 00:05:11,834 --> 00:05:13,254 that you just said "butt heads." 98 00:05:14,291 --> 00:05:16,541 And yet you've managed to make a joke in the very process 99 00:05:16,625 --> 00:05:17,955 of denying that you were doing so. 100 00:05:18,041 --> 00:05:19,041 Well played. 101 00:05:20,417 --> 00:05:21,537 Thank you, Karl. 102 00:05:21,625 --> 00:05:23,955 I knew you two would come together. 103 00:05:26,959 --> 00:05:28,669 Well, maybe I should get going. 104 00:05:29,667 --> 00:05:31,877 Or... you can stay. 105 00:05:32,834 --> 00:05:34,794 ( romantic music playing ) 106 00:05:34,875 --> 00:05:39,205 ♪ Oooh-ooh-ooh-ooh... ♪ 107 00:05:39,291 --> 00:05:40,751 The music is nice. 108 00:05:41,667 --> 00:05:43,417 Yes, it is. 109 00:05:46,208 --> 00:05:48,668 ( vocalizing ) 110 00:05:51,250 --> 00:05:52,290 Ahh! 111 00:05:52,375 --> 00:05:53,745 Ahh! 112 00:05:56,417 --> 00:05:58,827 I just had the most horrible nightmare. 113 00:05:58,917 --> 00:06:01,667 I was about to... kiss Karl Fink. 114 00:06:01,750 --> 00:06:04,710 This is your fault for trying to push us together, Stan. 115 00:06:04,792 --> 00:06:07,252 Hey, I just wanted you two to be friends. 116 00:06:07,333 --> 00:06:09,633 You're the one who's getting all freaky with it. 117 00:06:16,834 --> 00:06:18,134 Hey, Tyler. 118 00:06:18,208 --> 00:06:20,288 I want to practice some BMX tricks after my dance class. 119 00:06:20,375 --> 00:06:21,375 Will you help me? 120 00:06:21,458 --> 00:06:24,958 Chloe, you heard what Mom and Dad said. If I help you, I'll get in trouble. 121 00:06:25,041 --> 00:06:27,791 When did we switch places and you became the cute little girl? 122 00:06:29,709 --> 00:06:32,379 Chloe, I'm old enough now that I'm not gonna give in 123 00:06:32,458 --> 00:06:35,378 to peer pressure and be made to do something I know is wrong. 124 00:06:35,458 --> 00:06:36,668 I'm not in your peer group. 125 00:06:36,750 --> 00:06:38,210 Good point. Let's do it. 126 00:06:38,709 --> 00:06:41,919 But we're gonna have to keep this a secret from Mom and Dad. 127 00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:43,580 I'm good at keeping secrets. 128 00:06:43,667 --> 00:06:46,247 I kept the secret that I have mice in my sock drawer. 129 00:06:46,333 --> 00:06:47,673 ( Ellen screaming ) 130 00:06:47,750 --> 00:06:49,040 Sometimes they get out. 131 00:06:54,583 --> 00:06:56,543 Dad, I didn't sleep well last night. 132 00:06:56,625 --> 00:06:59,745 Were you up again writing presidential fan fiction? 133 00:06:59,834 --> 00:07:01,964 I just think James Buchanan and Edgar Allan Poe 134 00:07:02,041 --> 00:07:03,671 could've solved a lot of crimes together. 135 00:07:05,125 --> 00:07:06,375 But this is different. 136 00:07:06,458 --> 00:07:11,078 I didn't sleep well last night because I had a very disturbing dream. 137 00:07:11,166 --> 00:07:14,126 As a psychologist, you know about dream interpretation, right? 138 00:07:14,208 --> 00:07:15,878 I know a thing or two about it. 139 00:07:15,959 --> 00:07:19,129 A thing or two, or are you an expert? 140 00:07:19,208 --> 00:07:22,328 Sorry, I'm tired. I didn't mean to sound like Count Dracula. 141 00:07:23,458 --> 00:07:25,668 You'll get that when you read my latest installment. 142 00:07:26,166 --> 00:07:28,626 Buchanan and Poe have their hands full. 143 00:07:29,959 --> 00:07:32,169 Yes, I am an expert. 144 00:07:32,250 --> 00:07:35,880 In fact, maybe I'll write some psychology fan fiction 145 00:07:35,959 --> 00:07:40,919 featuring me and Sigmund Freud solving crimes of the mind. 146 00:07:42,709 --> 00:07:44,669 Fun. Don't. 147 00:07:46,875 --> 00:07:49,285 So tell me about this dream. 148 00:07:49,375 --> 00:07:51,575 Well, without going into the specifics, 149 00:07:51,667 --> 00:07:53,997 it was a dream in which I started to do something 150 00:07:54,083 --> 00:07:57,633 that I would never in a million years really want to do. 151 00:07:57,709 --> 00:07:59,959 Like swimming the butterfly through an open sewer 152 00:08:00,041 --> 00:08:02,211 or talking to my dad about something personal. 153 00:08:03,208 --> 00:08:04,708 So what does that mean? 154 00:08:04,792 --> 00:08:07,382 It may very well be your subconscious 155 00:08:07,458 --> 00:08:09,828 telling you that you do want to do this thing. 156 00:08:09,917 --> 00:08:12,167 Really? I see. 157 00:08:13,083 --> 00:08:15,133 ( silent scream ) 158 00:08:17,667 --> 00:08:20,957 Or it could be the exact opposite. Dreams are weird that way. 159 00:08:21,583 --> 00:08:24,173 Like when I dreamed I was an Olympic gymnast 160 00:08:24,250 --> 00:08:28,540 and I finished third on the pommel horse and my Bulgarian shot-putting girlfriend 161 00:08:28,625 --> 00:08:31,035 breaks up with me for a guy who didn't even medal. 162 00:08:31,125 --> 00:08:32,825 Didn't even medal! 163 00:08:34,417 --> 00:08:35,417 Avery? 164 00:08:36,625 --> 00:08:37,705 Avery! 165 00:08:39,166 --> 00:08:43,916 Oh. I know it was just a dream, but I wonder... 166 00:08:47,959 --> 00:08:49,579 Go for the gold, Bennett! 167 00:08:49,667 --> 00:08:51,537 Go for the gold! 168 00:08:51,625 --> 00:08:52,785 Huh! Oh... 169 00:08:52,875 --> 00:08:55,245 Oh! Oh! Oh! 170 00:08:55,333 --> 00:08:58,833 ( grunts ) I got it! I did it! I did it! 171 00:08:58,917 --> 00:09:00,077 No, I didn't. 172 00:09:00,542 --> 00:09:01,922 ( screams ) Oh! 173 00:09:06,083 --> 00:09:08,293 No wonder Svetlana broke up with you. 174 00:09:15,458 --> 00:09:17,538 I'm ready for my first BMX lesson, Tyler. 175 00:09:17,625 --> 00:09:20,415 -What are you wearing? -My dance recital costume. 176 00:09:20,500 --> 00:09:22,130 I'm a BMX princess. 177 00:09:22,208 --> 00:09:23,628 Sure, why not. 178 00:09:24,250 --> 00:09:26,540 They should make an animated movie about me. 179 00:09:26,625 --> 00:09:27,625 I'll sing this song. 180 00:09:28,166 --> 00:09:29,576 ♪ Ride the bike ♪ 181 00:09:29,667 --> 00:09:30,827 ♪ Ride the bike ♪ 182 00:09:30,917 --> 00:09:34,827 ♪ There'll be no stopping me ♪ 183 00:09:34,917 --> 00:09:36,497 ♪ Ride the bike ♪ 184 00:09:36,583 --> 00:09:37,753 ♪ Ride the bike ♪ 185 00:09:37,834 --> 00:09:41,964 ♪ While my princess dress flows free ♪ 186 00:09:42,041 --> 00:09:43,501 Probably win an Oscar. 187 00:09:45,458 --> 00:09:46,538 Sure, why not? 188 00:09:47,208 --> 00:09:49,498 Now let's get you up to the top of the ramp. 189 00:09:49,583 --> 00:09:52,003 Wow, you put that together all by yourself? 190 00:09:52,083 --> 00:09:53,633 Are we even allowed to do this here? 191 00:09:53,709 --> 00:09:55,129 Sure, why not? 192 00:09:57,125 --> 00:09:59,785 Safety is very important, Chloe. 193 00:09:59,875 --> 00:10:02,285 So before you do any riding, we are going to discuss 194 00:10:02,375 --> 00:10:03,745 exactly what's gonna happen, 195 00:10:03,834 --> 00:10:06,504 and then we're gonna walk through it a few times slowly 196 00:10:06,583 --> 00:10:07,963 so you can get the feel of what it's like-- 197 00:10:08,041 --> 00:10:10,081 YOLO! 198 00:10:12,250 --> 00:10:14,170 ( crashing ) 199 00:10:15,709 --> 00:10:19,079 That was awesome! 200 00:10:19,166 --> 00:10:20,376 Chloe, your dress! 201 00:10:22,709 --> 00:10:25,329 Tyler, why didn't we walk through it a few times slowly 202 00:10:25,417 --> 00:10:26,997 so I could get the feel of it? 203 00:10:33,250 --> 00:10:36,080 Hey, Karl. What's up? Plotting world domination? 204 00:10:36,166 --> 00:10:38,996 Oh, please. Dominating Pasadena will more than suffice. 205 00:10:39,083 --> 00:10:42,543 There are whole swaths of the world that are just nothing but headaches. 206 00:10:43,583 --> 00:10:44,673 Hello, Stan. 207 00:10:44,750 --> 00:10:48,460 Hey Karl. Did you see my plans for a cat teleportation device? 208 00:10:48,542 --> 00:10:51,292 It's just an X with a large rock hanging over it. 209 00:10:51,375 --> 00:10:52,535 Shh. 210 00:10:52,625 --> 00:10:54,495 The cats don't know that. 211 00:10:56,333 --> 00:10:58,753 So anyway, here's the thing. 212 00:10:58,834 --> 00:11:00,254 I had this weird dream, 213 00:11:00,333 --> 00:11:02,173 and I was thinking that we should talk about it. 214 00:11:02,750 --> 00:11:05,170 But now that I'm here, I realize it's just one dream. 215 00:11:05,250 --> 00:11:06,290 No big deal. Right? 216 00:11:06,375 --> 00:11:08,245 Quite possibly. It could mean nothing. 217 00:11:10,375 --> 00:11:11,995 Or it could mean this... 218 00:11:13,125 --> 00:11:14,575 ( romantic music playing ) 219 00:11:14,667 --> 00:11:18,167 ♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh... ♪ 220 00:11:21,250 --> 00:11:22,670 Ahh! 221 00:11:23,291 --> 00:11:25,711 Ahh! Karl, stop licking my hand! 222 00:11:27,250 --> 00:11:28,750 Ahh! 223 00:11:32,125 --> 00:11:33,375 Stan! 224 00:11:33,458 --> 00:11:37,378 You can't eat ribs for dinner and expect this not to happen. 225 00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:41,460 No, I had the nightmare again. 226 00:11:41,542 --> 00:11:43,672 Having the dream once could've been a fluke. 227 00:11:43,750 --> 00:11:45,580 But this is a pattern. 228 00:11:45,667 --> 00:11:46,827 What if my dad's right? 229 00:11:46,917 --> 00:11:50,207 What if it does represent a subconscious desire? 230 00:11:50,291 --> 00:11:53,251 I had a dream once that I ate a giant marshmallow, 231 00:11:53,333 --> 00:11:54,333 and when I woke up-- 232 00:11:54,417 --> 00:11:56,127 Don't tell me. The pillow was gone. 233 00:11:56,208 --> 00:11:58,578 No. Chloe was gone. 234 00:11:59,875 --> 00:12:00,915 Then she came back in. 235 00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:02,040 With marshmallows. 236 00:12:02,125 --> 00:12:03,825 But they were just regular size. 237 00:12:05,208 --> 00:12:08,878 Look, I know you're trying to cheer me up, but I'm freaking out. 238 00:12:09,375 --> 00:12:12,785 Maybe you should talk to Karl and see if it's really what you want. 239 00:12:12,875 --> 00:12:13,955 At least you'll know. 240 00:12:14,041 --> 00:12:15,711 No! I can't do that. 241 00:12:15,792 --> 00:12:18,172 I can never say anything to him about this. 242 00:12:18,250 --> 00:12:20,580 And you have to promise not to say anything to him either. 243 00:12:21,750 --> 00:12:26,000 Is it possible that I... like Karl Fink? 244 00:12:26,083 --> 00:12:27,753 ( retches ) 245 00:12:27,834 --> 00:12:31,464 Avery, either throw up or don't, but don't tease me like that. 246 00:12:36,834 --> 00:12:39,584 Hey, Karl. What's up? 247 00:12:39,667 --> 00:12:41,327 Not that something has to be up. 248 00:12:41,417 --> 00:12:43,287 Nothing's up. Stop grilling me! 249 00:12:44,709 --> 00:12:46,129 You're acting weird. 250 00:12:46,208 --> 00:12:48,538 Well, I mean, weirder than normal for a talking dog. 251 00:12:48,625 --> 00:12:51,325 Well, if anyone knows "weird," it's you, right? 252 00:12:51,417 --> 00:12:53,287 I love the way you say "It's not weird." 253 00:12:53,375 --> 00:12:55,165 Do that. Do that for me now. 254 00:12:55,250 --> 00:12:56,830 Say "It's not weird." 255 00:12:58,250 --> 00:13:00,040 I suppose I may say that on occasion, 256 00:13:00,125 --> 00:13:02,245 but it's a perfectly acceptable turn of phrase. 257 00:13:02,333 --> 00:13:03,503 It's not weird. 258 00:13:04,166 --> 00:13:06,416 Ah, you said it! 259 00:13:06,500 --> 00:13:08,920 I love when you say that! 260 00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:11,000 Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! 261 00:13:11,083 --> 00:13:13,883 Is it hot in here? Stop grilling me! 262 00:13:15,583 --> 00:13:18,133 Stan, you're obviously uncomfortable about something, 263 00:13:18,208 --> 00:13:20,748 and I'm assuming there's a reason you came over here, so what is it? 264 00:13:20,834 --> 00:13:22,384 Not a secret I promised to keep 265 00:13:22,458 --> 00:13:25,628 that Avery dreamed about kissing you, that's for sure. 266 00:13:25,709 --> 00:13:26,789 Dang it! 267 00:13:28,125 --> 00:13:31,165 How do you successfully keep the secret that you can talk? 268 00:13:31,250 --> 00:13:32,790 I have no idea. 269 00:13:39,542 --> 00:13:41,212 Chloe, your recital is tomorrow. 270 00:13:41,291 --> 00:13:43,921 Why didn't you ask Avery to fix the costume like we talked about? 271 00:13:44,000 --> 00:13:46,040 I did. She said she can't fix it. 272 00:13:46,125 --> 00:13:47,455 I can't fix it. 273 00:13:48,458 --> 00:13:50,128 What do you mean, she can't fix it? 274 00:13:50,208 --> 00:13:52,458 She's a whiz with sewing. She's doing this whole fashion thing. 275 00:13:52,542 --> 00:13:55,832 I may be a whiz with sewing and doing this whole fashion thing, 276 00:13:55,917 --> 00:13:57,417 but the fabric is ruined. 277 00:13:57,500 --> 00:13:59,000 Can't she get more fabric? 278 00:13:59,583 --> 00:14:00,583 No. 279 00:14:01,625 --> 00:14:03,995 But there has to be something that she can do. 280 00:14:04,083 --> 00:14:06,133 There's nothing Avery can do, Chloe. 281 00:14:06,208 --> 00:14:08,628 And it's late. She's already asleep. 282 00:14:08,709 --> 00:14:11,249 Now if you'll excuse me, Avery had ribs for dinner 283 00:14:11,333 --> 00:14:13,423 and there's something very important I have to do. 284 00:14:18,625 --> 00:14:20,205 Go to bed and wait. 285 00:14:20,291 --> 00:14:22,421 I'll get to you later, Chicken Fingers. 286 00:14:24,166 --> 00:14:26,786 We are gonna be in such huge trouble when Mom and Dad see this. 287 00:14:26,875 --> 00:14:29,785 Well, the recital's not until tomorrow. 288 00:14:29,875 --> 00:14:32,535 Maybe something magical will happen to get us out of this. 289 00:14:32,625 --> 00:14:35,575 Chloe, be realistic. Nothing magical ever happens to us. 290 00:14:35,667 --> 00:14:37,917 -Hey, guys. What's up? -Stan, we're busy. 291 00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:39,960 We don't have time for a talking dog right now. 292 00:14:41,542 --> 00:14:42,832 Bennett: Chloe? 293 00:14:45,041 --> 00:14:48,001 Chloe, go put on your recital costume. We're going to take some pictures. 294 00:14:48,083 --> 00:14:50,963 Now? The recital's not until tomorrow. 295 00:14:51,041 --> 00:14:53,041 Yeah, but the pictures never turn out at the recital 296 00:14:53,125 --> 00:14:54,825 because they won't let you use the flash. 297 00:14:54,917 --> 00:14:58,127 What do you mean? I look so cute in this photo from last year. 298 00:14:59,667 --> 00:15:01,577 Chloe, put on your costume. 299 00:15:01,667 --> 00:15:04,207 -Where is the good camera? -I think it's in your office. 300 00:15:04,291 --> 00:15:05,751 Remember, we set it up on the timer 301 00:15:05,834 --> 00:15:08,134 to take that picture of me using the Force on you? 302 00:15:08,667 --> 00:15:11,037 -( beeping ) -Now! 303 00:15:14,333 --> 00:15:17,213 -We'll go get the camera. -Chloe, get your costume on. 304 00:15:19,458 --> 00:15:21,208 Whew, that was close. 305 00:15:21,291 --> 00:15:23,251 They almost caught me and Robert having a little fun 306 00:15:23,333 --> 00:15:24,383 with their camera. 307 00:15:29,667 --> 00:15:31,827 -Knockedy-- -Please don't say "knockedy" again. 308 00:15:33,125 --> 00:15:34,875 All right, I won't. 309 00:15:37,709 --> 00:15:39,829 All right, I can't say just one and leave it hanging. "Knockedy." 310 00:15:39,917 --> 00:15:41,377 Ha. There. Isn't that better? 311 00:15:43,083 --> 00:15:46,253 Karl, you are the last person I want to see right now. 312 00:15:46,834 --> 00:15:49,084 Avery, Stan told me. 313 00:15:49,834 --> 00:15:50,834 He told you? 314 00:15:50,917 --> 00:15:52,917 And if this is something that's haunting your dreams, 315 00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:55,290 perhaps it's something that we should explore. 316 00:15:57,000 --> 00:15:58,420 Perhaps it is. 317 00:16:01,458 --> 00:16:03,458 ( romantic music playing ) 318 00:16:03,542 --> 00:16:07,672 ♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh... ♪ 319 00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:11,380 Ahh! 320 00:16:11,458 --> 00:16:13,038 It is weird! 321 00:16:18,458 --> 00:16:20,628 I don't know how glue is gonna fix the dress. 322 00:16:20,709 --> 00:16:21,749 Do you have a better idea? 323 00:16:23,166 --> 00:16:25,246 If I just pat it down here, we can-- 324 00:16:27,500 --> 00:16:28,540 Okay, don't freak out, 325 00:16:28,625 --> 00:16:30,075 but I think my hand is glued to your shoulder. 326 00:16:30,166 --> 00:16:32,286 -Tyler! -I said don't freak out. 327 00:16:33,208 --> 00:16:35,958 I can get some leverage if I push my hand off. 328 00:16:39,709 --> 00:16:42,209 You just glued your other hand to my head, didn't you? 329 00:16:42,291 --> 00:16:43,631 Yes. Yes, I did. 330 00:16:43,709 --> 00:16:46,249 -I can push off my with my-- -Stop! 331 00:16:46,333 --> 00:16:48,423 Everything you do makes it worse. 332 00:16:50,542 --> 00:16:52,792 Well, you called that one. Our sides are glued together. 333 00:16:54,083 --> 00:16:56,253 Okay, time for pictures. 334 00:16:56,333 --> 00:16:57,583 Tyler, move out of the way. 335 00:16:57,667 --> 00:17:01,167 No, no. I want to be in these pictures with Chloe. 336 00:17:01,250 --> 00:17:03,790 My little dancing sis who I love so much. 337 00:17:03,875 --> 00:17:05,955 I'm so proud of you. So proud. 338 00:17:07,250 --> 00:17:09,000 That is so sweet. 339 00:17:10,750 --> 00:17:13,420 Okay, now, Tyler, get out of the way. I want to get some of her dancing. 340 00:17:14,959 --> 00:17:18,879 Or some of us dancing together. 341 00:17:18,959 --> 00:17:20,539 Yeah. Whoo. 342 00:17:21,583 --> 00:17:22,543 Ow! 343 00:17:22,625 --> 00:17:24,745 I mean, yay! 344 00:17:25,959 --> 00:17:27,669 Kids, what is going on here? 345 00:17:27,750 --> 00:17:29,670 You know how you always say that 346 00:17:29,750 --> 00:17:32,880 brothers and sisters should stick together? 347 00:17:34,875 --> 00:17:36,955 Okay, here's your punishment. 348 00:17:37,041 --> 00:17:39,751 We called the dance studio and there are no more costumes 349 00:17:39,834 --> 00:17:41,384 for the princess number. 350 00:17:41,458 --> 00:17:45,248 But they do have extras for the tin soldier dance. 351 00:17:45,333 --> 00:17:46,883 With the kindergarteners. 352 00:17:46,959 --> 00:17:48,169 ( gasps ) 353 00:17:51,959 --> 00:17:53,329 Take it from me, kids. 354 00:17:53,417 --> 00:17:55,457 You don't want to go behind your parents' back. 355 00:17:55,542 --> 00:17:57,082 I've been down that road. 356 00:17:59,333 --> 00:18:02,213 And the choreography doesn't work with an odd number of girls. 357 00:18:02,291 --> 00:18:04,251 So your punishment, Tyler, is... 358 00:18:04,333 --> 00:18:05,543 ( gasps ) 359 00:18:19,333 --> 00:18:21,293 Mom, I need some advice. 360 00:18:21,375 --> 00:18:22,955 Of course. Sit. 361 00:18:23,041 --> 00:18:25,831 We'll have cheesecake as I share my experiences, 362 00:18:25,917 --> 00:18:27,497 my wisdom, my love. 363 00:18:27,583 --> 00:18:30,133 I live for these moments when you come to me like this. 364 00:18:30,208 --> 00:18:32,538 And I might do it more if you didn't make 365 00:18:32,625 --> 00:18:34,325 such a big deal out of it. 366 00:18:39,542 --> 00:18:41,382 So what's happenin'? Let's chat. Break it down. 367 00:18:43,667 --> 00:18:44,707 When you were younger, 368 00:18:44,792 --> 00:18:46,962 was there ever a boy you thought you didn't like, 369 00:18:47,041 --> 00:18:49,131 but maybe you really did, but you just didn't know it? 370 00:18:49,208 --> 00:18:51,038 What is some boy telling you? 371 00:18:52,375 --> 00:18:54,705 No, no, no, no one's telling me anything. 372 00:18:54,792 --> 00:18:56,752 I just might be confused. 373 00:18:56,834 --> 00:18:58,964 When you met Dad, how did you know you liked him? 374 00:18:59,583 --> 00:19:00,963 Well, I didn't know at first. 375 00:19:01,041 --> 00:19:02,961 Not until the night of our first kiss. 376 00:19:03,667 --> 00:19:05,417 He put his hand on my cheek. 377 00:19:05,500 --> 00:19:07,210 I put my hand on his shoulder. 378 00:19:07,917 --> 00:19:12,457 And as I closed my eyes, even before we kissed, I knew. 379 00:19:13,750 --> 00:19:16,000 Wow. That's really romantic. 380 00:19:16,917 --> 00:19:19,627 -Thanks, Mom. -Any time. No big. It's all good. 381 00:19:21,542 --> 00:19:23,752 I did not just advise you to kiss a boy. 382 00:19:23,834 --> 00:19:26,044 I knew before the kiss! No kiss! No kiss! 383 00:19:30,083 --> 00:19:31,173 Thanks for coming. 384 00:19:31,250 --> 00:19:33,000 I got your text that you needed to see me. 385 00:19:33,083 --> 00:19:34,503 I think I know why. 386 00:19:34,583 --> 00:19:35,963 Stan told me about your dream. 387 00:19:36,041 --> 00:19:38,331 He told you about the kissing and the hand licking? 388 00:19:38,417 --> 00:19:40,877 -What hand licking? -Hand licking? I never said hand licking. 389 00:19:40,959 --> 00:19:42,749 I wasn't getting all freaky with it. 390 00:19:45,291 --> 00:19:47,461 Ohh, this is so humiliating. 391 00:19:47,542 --> 00:19:48,582 For both of us. 392 00:19:48,667 --> 00:19:52,037 After Stan planted the idea in my head, I had the same dream. 393 00:19:52,125 --> 00:19:53,995 Only without your freaky hand licking. 394 00:19:56,291 --> 00:19:59,541 Wait. How do we know this isn't a dream? 395 00:19:59,625 --> 00:20:01,285 There's only one way to find out. 396 00:20:03,333 --> 00:20:04,253 Both: Ahhh! 397 00:20:04,333 --> 00:20:05,423 It's not a dream. 398 00:20:05,500 --> 00:20:07,880 Your fingers are like little vices! 399 00:20:09,875 --> 00:20:14,455 You know, we'll never get past this if we don't explore whether or not 400 00:20:14,542 --> 00:20:16,712 there's any real feelings here. 401 00:20:17,709 --> 00:20:18,879 ( both shudder ) 402 00:20:20,417 --> 00:20:21,417 Stan. 403 00:20:22,583 --> 00:20:23,883 ( romantic music playing ) 404 00:20:23,959 --> 00:20:27,329 ♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh... ♪ 405 00:20:28,875 --> 00:20:30,915 Ellen: He put his hand on my cheek. 406 00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:32,830 I put my hand on his shoulder. 407 00:20:33,500 --> 00:20:36,670 And as I closed my eyes, even before we kissed, 408 00:20:36,750 --> 00:20:37,790 I knew. 409 00:20:38,458 --> 00:20:40,038 I know. 410 00:20:40,125 --> 00:20:42,325 Just like with my mom, I know. 411 00:20:43,542 --> 00:20:45,042 I could not be more repulsed right now 412 00:20:45,125 --> 00:20:47,375 if I were sucking the sweat out of an old gym sock. 413 00:20:49,750 --> 00:20:50,960 Oh, Avery. 414 00:20:51,041 --> 00:20:53,171 I feel the exact same way. 415 00:20:53,250 --> 00:20:56,250 Only I had licking the sludge from the hair trap in my sink. 416 00:20:58,709 --> 00:21:01,379 -So I'm gonna leave quickly now. -The quicker the better. Goodbye. 417 00:21:02,750 --> 00:21:05,040 Well, I bet you feel better now, don't you? 418 00:21:05,125 --> 00:21:07,165 -Good for you, Avery. -Yeah. 419 00:21:07,250 --> 00:21:08,790 But we still have the little matter 420 00:21:08,875 --> 00:21:12,165 to discuss of you telling Karl about my dream. 421 00:21:12,250 --> 00:21:14,880 But... I didn't. 422 00:21:14,959 --> 00:21:17,169 This is all a dream. 423 00:21:17,792 --> 00:21:19,422 I'm not really a talking dog. 424 00:21:19,500 --> 00:21:21,210 How crazy would that be? 425 00:21:21,291 --> 00:21:23,251 It's all a dream, dream, 426 00:21:23,333 --> 00:21:25,173 dream, a dream, dream, dream... 427 00:21:25,834 --> 00:21:27,674 But the part where you feed me table scraps 428 00:21:27,750 --> 00:21:29,830 is real, real, real... 429 00:21:29,917 --> 00:21:31,207 So keep doing that. 430 00:21:33,709 --> 00:21:36,039 Stan: Well, Avery and Karl never did kiss. 431 00:21:36,125 --> 00:21:39,035 But I hope the whole thing brings them closer together. 432 00:21:39,125 --> 00:21:41,705 Speaking of getting closer together... 433 00:21:43,458 --> 00:21:46,038 Kinda lonely in the house tonight, isn't it, Stan? 434 00:21:46,125 --> 00:21:47,415 Just you and me. 435 00:21:49,125 --> 00:21:50,995 ( romantic music playing ) 436 00:21:51,083 --> 00:21:54,503 ♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh... ♪ 437 00:21:56,500 --> 00:21:57,710 Ahh! 438 00:21:59,500 --> 00:22:00,920 ( music playing ) 439 00:22:01,250 --> 00:22:02,250 ( boing ) 32794

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