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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,625 --> 00:00:05,415 DID YOU ENJOY YOUR WALK, BUDDY? 2 00:00:05,500 --> 00:00:07,630 LOVE THE WALK, HATE THE LEASH. 3 00:00:08,667 --> 00:00:09,827 HOW WOULD YOU LIKE GETTING YANKED BY THE NECK 4 00:00:09,917 --> 00:00:12,377 EVERY TIME YOU TRIED TO LICK A BABY? 5 00:00:12,458 --> 00:00:15,498 THE NEIGHBORS GET UPSET IF DOGS AREN'T ON A LEASH. 6 00:00:16,041 --> 00:00:17,831 OH, SO NOW I'M A DOG? 7 00:00:17,917 --> 00:00:20,417 JUST BECAUSE I HAVE FOUR LEGS, FUR, A TAIL, AND... 8 00:00:20,500 --> 00:00:22,040 YEAH, OKAY, I SEE YOUR POINT. 9 00:00:22,750 --> 00:00:23,750 BUT COME ON! 10 00:00:23,834 --> 00:00:26,004 THESE BLUE POOP BAGS TIED TO MY COLLAR? 11 00:00:26,083 --> 00:00:27,253 TALK ABOUT DEMEANING! 12 00:00:28,291 --> 00:00:31,671 I'M SORRY, BUT IF YOU GO, I HAVE TO CLEAN UP AFTER YOU, 13 00:00:31,750 --> 00:00:33,960 AND IT'S JUST HANDIER THIS WAY. 14 00:00:34,083 --> 00:00:35,043 OH, REALLY? 15 00:00:35,125 --> 00:00:36,665 AND WHEN AM I GONNA SEE YOU WALKING AROUND 16 00:00:36,750 --> 00:00:40,000 WITH A ROLL OF TOILET PAPER AROUND YOUR NECK? 17 00:00:40,083 --> 00:00:43,043 WHEN I START POOPING ON THE SIDEWALK. 18 00:00:43,125 --> 00:00:46,125 NOW, NOW, NOW. FAIR IS FAIR. 19 00:00:46,208 --> 00:00:48,538 REALLY? THIS MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER? 20 00:00:50,291 --> 00:00:54,001 I'M NOT PROUD OF IT, BUT YES. YES, IT DOES. 21 00:00:54,083 --> 00:00:56,633 ALTHOUGH I'LL TELL YOU WHAT REALLY MAKES ME FEEL BETTER. 22 00:00:58,500 --> 00:01:01,040 ( laughing ) 23 00:01:20,417 --> 00:01:21,707 WE'RE HOME! 24 00:01:21,792 --> 00:01:23,752 WAIT TILL THEY HEAR YOU GOT YOUR LEARNER'S PERMIT, HUH? 25 00:01:23,834 --> 00:01:27,134 YEAH! I CAN FINALLY DRIVE! WHOO-HOO! 26 00:01:27,208 --> 00:01:28,628 Stan: THIS SHAVED MONKEY CAN DRIVE A CAR, 27 00:01:28,709 --> 00:01:30,249 AND I CAN'T EVEN CHASE ONE? 28 00:01:30,333 --> 00:01:31,583 YEAH, THAT'S FAIR. 29 00:01:32,583 --> 00:01:34,673 TYLER, SWEETIE, I'M SO SORRY. DON'T FEEL BAD. 30 00:01:34,750 --> 00:01:35,920 A LOT OF PEOPLE DON'T PASS THEIR TEST 31 00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:37,040 -THE FIRST TIME. -I PASSED. 32 00:01:37,125 --> 00:01:39,285 YOU'LL GET 'EM NEXT TIME-- WHAT? 33 00:01:40,083 --> 00:01:41,253 YOU DID? REALLY? 34 00:01:41,333 --> 00:01:43,583 WOW! REALLY? 35 00:01:43,667 --> 00:01:45,497 HEY, TYLER, TOO BAD, 36 00:01:45,583 --> 00:01:46,713 BUT, I MEAN, MAYBE IF YOU'D STUDIED-- 37 00:01:46,792 --> 00:01:47,712 I PASSED. 38 00:01:47,792 --> 00:01:49,462 YOU'RE GONNA BE DRIVING? 39 00:01:50,458 --> 00:01:52,578 CONGRATULATIONS. WHAT A GREAT ACCOMPLISHMENT! 40 00:01:52,667 --> 00:01:54,667 IS THIS REALLY A GOOD IDEA? 41 00:01:55,667 --> 00:01:57,457 I MADE THIS TO CHEER YOU UP. 42 00:01:57,542 --> 00:01:58,382 I PASSED. 43 00:01:58,458 --> 00:02:01,078 I'LL SAVE IT FOR YOUR REPORT CARD. 44 00:02:02,500 --> 00:02:06,920 I CANNOT BELIEVE MY LITTLE BOY'S GONNA BE DRIVING. 45 00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:09,330 -YOU ARE GROWING UP SO FAST! -NOT THE HAIR! 46 00:02:09,417 --> 00:02:10,457 NOT THE HAIR! 47 00:02:10,542 --> 00:02:13,172 -AHH! -OH MAN! 48 00:02:14,250 --> 00:02:16,670 I STILL REMEMBER WHEN YOU WERE JUST A LITTLE TYKE, 49 00:02:16,750 --> 00:02:19,170 MOTORING AROUND IN THAT TOY CAR OF YOURS. 50 00:02:21,333 --> 00:02:24,923 YOU ARE GETTING TO BE SUCH A GOOD DRIVER! 51 00:02:25,542 --> 00:02:27,792 Stan: WHOA! LOOK AT BENNETT BACK THEN. 52 00:02:27,875 --> 00:02:30,575 LOOKS LIKE A BEARDED COLLIE I USED TO DATE. 53 00:02:31,667 --> 00:02:33,327 I WONDER WHAT HAPPENED TO HER? 54 00:02:34,041 --> 00:02:35,921 I'M SO PROUD OF YOU! 55 00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:37,830 NOT THE HAIR! NOT THE HAIR! 56 00:02:40,041 --> 00:02:41,791 OH, MAN! 57 00:02:43,291 --> 00:02:44,881 THIS IS THE FIRST BIG MILESTONE 58 00:02:44,959 --> 00:02:46,669 SINCE OUR TWO FAMILIES MERGED, 59 00:02:46,750 --> 00:02:49,540 MUCH LIKE TYLER WILL BE MERGING ON THE FREEWAY. 60 00:02:49,625 --> 00:02:50,665 HA-HA! GOOD ONE, ELLEN. 61 00:02:51,792 --> 00:02:53,292 WHAT DO YOU SAY WE ALL GO OUT FOR PIZZA 62 00:02:53,375 --> 00:02:55,535 TO CELEBRATE THAT CLEVER WORDPLAY, 63 00:02:55,625 --> 00:02:57,245 AND TYLER BEING ABLE TO DRIVE. 64 00:02:57,333 --> 00:02:58,503 All: YEAH! 65 00:02:58,583 --> 00:02:59,503 I'LL DRIVE! 66 00:02:59,583 --> 00:03:00,883 All: NO! 67 00:03:00,959 --> 00:03:02,629 YOU NEED TO PRACTICE FIRST. 68 00:03:02,709 --> 00:03:05,079 COME ON, WHY DO I NEED TO PRACTICE? 69 00:03:05,166 --> 00:03:07,996 BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU, AND WE CARE ABOUT YOU, 70 00:03:08,083 --> 00:03:09,673 AND WE DON'T WANT ANYTHING TO HAPPEN TO US. 71 00:03:11,750 --> 00:03:14,290 Stan: YAY, PIZZA! PIZZA WITH THE FAMILY! 72 00:03:14,375 --> 00:03:16,415 PEPPERONI, HERE I-- 73 00:03:16,500 --> 00:03:18,330 I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY FORGOT ME. 74 00:03:18,417 --> 00:03:19,627 OH, I ALMOST FORGOT. 75 00:03:19,709 --> 00:03:21,249 WAIT! THEY'RE COMING BACK FOR ME. 76 00:03:21,333 --> 00:03:23,043 OH, I KNEW THEY WOULD! 77 00:03:23,125 --> 00:03:25,325 I CAN'T BELIEVE WE FORGOT YOU. 78 00:03:25,417 --> 00:03:26,747 I KNOW. CRAZY, RIGHT? 79 00:03:26,875 --> 00:03:28,825 LET'S GET OUTTA HERE, PAL. 80 00:03:28,917 --> 00:03:29,747 COME ON, CHLOE. 81 00:03:30,625 --> 00:03:31,625 HA! 82 00:03:33,125 --> 00:03:35,575 AND I CALLED YOU PAL! 83 00:03:37,166 --> 00:03:39,876 ONCE AGAIN, THEY TREAT ME LIKE A DOG. 84 00:03:39,959 --> 00:03:41,879 WHY DON'T THEY SEE I'M JUST LIKE THEY ARE? 85 00:03:41,959 --> 00:03:44,079 IF YOU PRICK ME, DO I NOT BLEED? 86 00:03:44,166 --> 00:03:47,876 IF I DREAM OF CHASING RABBITS, DO I NOT RUN IN PLACE? 87 00:03:47,959 --> 00:03:50,499 IT MAKES ME SO MAD, I JUST WANNA-- 88 00:03:50,583 --> 00:03:52,503 UGH! I WANNA-- 89 00:03:52,583 --> 00:03:54,883 MM! HA-HA! 90 00:03:54,959 --> 00:03:57,249 THAT'LL SHOW THEM I'M MORE THAN A DOG! 91 00:03:58,125 --> 00:04:00,625 WAIT, DID I JUST UNDERMINE MY OWN ARGUMENT? 92 00:04:00,709 --> 00:04:03,079 WHO CARES? IT'S FUN! 93 00:04:07,208 --> 00:04:09,168 HEY, THANKS FOR DOING THIS LESSON WITH ME NOW. 94 00:04:09,250 --> 00:04:12,080 I KNOW AFTER PIZZA, YOU USUALLY LIKE TO UNBUCKLE YOUR BELT, 95 00:04:12,166 --> 00:04:14,786 MAKE THAT NOISE, AND GO RIGHT TO SLEEP. 96 00:04:14,875 --> 00:04:17,415 DONE, DONE, AND LATER. 97 00:04:18,875 --> 00:04:22,075 OKAY, YOU NEED TO CHECK YOUR MIRRORS EVERY TWO TO FIVE SECONDS. 98 00:04:22,166 --> 00:04:25,286 HANDS AT TEN AND TWO. ALWAYS BE SCANNING YOUR SURROUNDINGS. 99 00:04:25,375 --> 00:04:26,625 KEEP YOUR EYES MOVING. 100 00:04:26,709 --> 00:04:27,629 THAT'S FIVE SECONDS! 101 00:04:27,709 --> 00:04:28,879 CHECK THE MIRROR, CHECK THE MIRROR! 102 00:04:28,959 --> 00:04:31,079 DAD, THIS IS JUST LIKE WHEN I WAS LITTLE! 103 00:04:31,166 --> 00:04:32,706 ALWAYS BE SCANNING YOUR SURROUNDINGS, 104 00:04:32,792 --> 00:04:34,082 KEEP YOUR EYES MOVING. 105 00:04:34,166 --> 00:04:35,456 HANDS AT TEN AND TWO. 106 00:04:35,542 --> 00:04:37,332 CHECK THE MIRROR, CHECK THE MIRROR. 107 00:04:37,417 --> 00:04:39,127 I DON'T HAVE A MIRROR! 108 00:04:40,208 --> 00:04:41,418 I SAID TEN AND TWO. 109 00:04:41,500 --> 00:04:44,540 I BELIEVE THAT IS NINE AND 1:45. 110 00:04:44,625 --> 00:04:46,375 WHEN CAN I DRIVE BY MYSELF? 111 00:04:46,458 --> 00:04:49,248 LOOK, SON, I-I KNOW YOU'RE FRUSTRATED, OKAY, 112 00:04:49,333 --> 00:04:51,883 BUT IT'S CALLED A LEARNER'S PERMIT FOR A REASON. 113 00:04:51,959 --> 00:04:54,329 -EYES ON THE ROAD! -DAD... 114 00:04:54,417 --> 00:04:56,457 -CAN I ASK YOU A QUESTION? -OF COURSE. 115 00:04:56,542 --> 00:04:58,212 WHEN CAN I START THE ENGINE? 116 00:04:59,667 --> 00:05:01,537 LOVE THE EAGER BEAVER ATTITUDE, 117 00:05:01,625 --> 00:05:04,665 BUT LET'S NOT JUMP THREE WEEKS AHEAD IN MY LESSON PLAN. 118 00:05:04,750 --> 00:05:06,130 CHECK THE MIRROR! CHECK THE MIRROR! 119 00:05:06,208 --> 00:05:08,538 ( overlapping shouts ) 120 00:05:08,625 --> 00:05:10,495 -WE'RE NOT EVEN DRIVING! -OH, WE'VE CRASHED! 121 00:05:10,583 --> 00:05:13,083 THERE'S THE AIRBAG! THERE'S THE SIDE ONE! 122 00:05:13,166 --> 00:05:14,456 HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY! 123 00:05:15,125 --> 00:05:17,625 THANKS SO MUCH FOR DOING THIS LESSON WITH ME. 124 00:05:17,709 --> 00:05:19,709 DAD WOULDN'T EVEN LET ME START THE CAR. 125 00:05:19,792 --> 00:05:21,252 OH! 126 00:05:22,125 --> 00:05:23,285 OH! 127 00:05:24,166 --> 00:05:26,286 ( comical shrieking ) 128 00:05:26,375 --> 00:05:28,665 MOM, THAT'S REALLY DISTRACTING WHILE I'M DRIVING. 129 00:05:28,750 --> 00:05:30,540 OKAY. SORRY. 130 00:05:30,625 --> 00:05:33,035 DIDN'T MEAN FOR MY WILL TO LIVE TO DISTRACT YOU. 131 00:05:33,125 --> 00:05:35,705 OH! OH! OH! ( pumping foot ) 132 00:05:35,792 --> 00:05:38,712 WHY ARE YOU PUMPING AN IMAGINARY BRAKE PEDAL? IT DOESN'T DO ANYTHING. 133 00:05:38,792 --> 00:05:40,462 YOU THINK I DON'T KNOW THAT? 134 00:05:41,458 --> 00:05:43,828 OH, HERE'S ANOTHER MILESTONE-- 135 00:05:44,500 --> 00:05:46,500 MY FIRST TERROR SWEAT. 136 00:05:46,583 --> 00:05:47,883 YAY! 137 00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:51,920 THIS IS JUST LIKE THE FIRST MEMORY I EVER HAD-- 138 00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:54,130 SOME NUT JOB ALMOST RAN OVER ME. 139 00:05:54,208 --> 00:05:55,418 WHAT DO YOU THINK, AVERY? 140 00:05:55,500 --> 00:05:57,630 WANNA GO AROUND THE PARK ONE MORE TIME? 141 00:05:57,709 --> 00:05:59,419 Stan: CHECK OUT ELLEN'S RED HAIR. 142 00:05:59,500 --> 00:06:02,080 REMINDS ME OF AN IRISH SETTER I USED TO DATE. 143 00:06:03,125 --> 00:06:04,915 WONDER WHAT HAPPENED TO HER? 144 00:06:05,583 --> 00:06:07,713 TEN AND TWO! TEN AND TWO! 145 00:06:11,792 --> 00:06:14,332 TYLER DRIVES JUST LIKE THAT LITTLE MANIAC, 146 00:06:14,417 --> 00:06:17,287 AND THERE IS NO WAY HE KNOWS THE RULES OF THE ROAD. 147 00:06:18,125 --> 00:06:20,325 WHEN TWO VEHICLES MEET ON A STEEP MOUNTAIN ROAD 148 00:06:20,417 --> 00:06:22,997 WHERE NEITHER CAN PASS, WHO HAS THE RIGHT-OF-WAY, 149 00:06:23,083 --> 00:06:24,753 THE UPHILL OR THE DOWNHILL VEHICLE? 150 00:06:24,834 --> 00:06:26,674 DO YOU KNOW? DO YOU EVEN KNOW? 151 00:06:27,166 --> 00:06:29,456 WHO CARES? EVERYONE IN THE TWO CARS... 152 00:06:29,542 --> 00:06:31,252 THAT JUST PLUMMETED OFF THE SIDE OF THE MOUNTAIN 153 00:06:31,333 --> 00:06:33,003 IF YOU WERE DRIVING ONE OF THEM. 154 00:06:33,709 --> 00:06:36,379 NOW, KIDS, IT'S IMPORTANT FOR THE DRIVER TO REMAIN CALM AND FOCUSED, 155 00:06:36,458 --> 00:06:37,538 SO LET'S NOT DO ANYTHING TO-- 156 00:06:37,625 --> 00:06:39,415 TEN AND TWO! TEN AND TWO! 157 00:06:39,500 --> 00:06:40,830 Ellen: AH! AAH! AAH! 158 00:06:40,917 --> 00:06:43,667 YOU ARE ALL DRIVING ME CRAZY WITH YOUR NERVOUSNESS 159 00:06:43,750 --> 00:06:46,170 AND OVER-COACHING AND TALKING ABOUT THINGS THAT DON'T EXIST, 160 00:06:46,250 --> 00:06:47,210 LIKE ROADS ON MOUNTAINS. 161 00:06:48,250 --> 00:06:50,330 I WISH I COULD JUST DRIVE BY MYSELF. 162 00:06:50,417 --> 00:06:53,457 SO DO I. WHY DO I EVEN HAVE TO BE HERE? 163 00:06:53,542 --> 00:06:54,632 CHLOE'S NOT HERE. 164 00:06:55,333 --> 00:06:56,583 CHLOE! 165 00:06:56,875 --> 00:06:58,955 WE FORGOT CHLOE, AGAIN! 166 00:06:59,041 --> 00:07:00,671 DRIVE HOME, QUICK. BUT SLOWLY. 167 00:07:05,709 --> 00:07:08,079 HERE'S A PICTURE OF TYLER WHEN HE WAS THREE. 168 00:07:08,792 --> 00:07:09,712 Both: AW! 169 00:07:11,291 --> 00:07:13,791 HERE'S ONE OF AVERY WHEN SHE WAS TWO. 170 00:07:13,875 --> 00:07:15,075 Both: AW! 171 00:07:16,333 --> 00:07:18,463 THIS TEA IS SO DELICIOUS. 172 00:07:19,667 --> 00:07:22,127 Both: MM! 173 00:07:22,208 --> 00:07:23,668 IT'S FUNNY ISN'T IT, HON? 174 00:07:23,750 --> 00:07:25,670 THINGS LIKE TYLER LEARNING HOW TO DRIVE, 175 00:07:25,750 --> 00:07:27,580 IT REALLY MAKES YOU MISS WHEN THEY WERE LITTLE. 176 00:07:27,667 --> 00:07:30,417 -OH, YEAH. -YOU JUST WISH YOU COULD HAVE MORE OF IT. 177 00:07:30,458 --> 00:07:32,038 -DADDY? -NOT NOW, SWEETIE. 178 00:07:32,125 --> 00:07:33,415 WE'RE LOOKING AT PICTURES. 179 00:07:35,458 --> 00:07:38,168 OH, WOW. HERE IS ONE OF TYLER 180 00:07:38,250 --> 00:07:41,210 AND THAT LITTLE TOY CAR HE USED TO DRIVE AROUND THE NEIGHBORHOOD PARK. 181 00:07:41,291 --> 00:07:44,001 OH, AVERY AND I USED TO GO TO THAT PARK WHEN SHE WAS LITTLE. 182 00:07:44,083 --> 00:07:47,133 OH! THIS ONE DAY, WE RAN INTO THE MOST OBNOXIOUS MAN. 183 00:07:47,208 --> 00:07:49,748 TEN AND TWO! TEN AND TWO! 184 00:07:50,375 --> 00:07:51,825 WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING! 185 00:07:51,917 --> 00:07:54,997 EASY, LADY. WE GOT AS MUCH RIGHT TO BE HERE AS YOU DO. 186 00:07:55,083 --> 00:07:57,633 NOT IF YOU'RE GONNA DRIVE YOUR KID AROUND LIKE A MANIAC. 187 00:07:58,625 --> 00:08:00,915 Stan: HOW CAN THEY NOT REMEMBER THEY MET BEFORE? 188 00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:03,790 SEE, THIS IS WHY DOGS SNIFF BUTTS. 189 00:08:04,583 --> 00:08:07,043 I PITY THE POOR SLOB THAT'S MARRIED TO HER. 190 00:08:07,125 --> 00:08:10,325 WELL, IF I NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN, IT'LL BE TOO SOON. 191 00:08:11,417 --> 00:08:14,537 THAT PARK ATTRACTED ALL KINDS OF WEIRDOES IN THOSE DAYS. 192 00:08:14,625 --> 00:08:17,165 UGH! THERE WAS THIS ONE ANNOYING WOMAN. 193 00:08:17,250 --> 00:08:19,500 -YOU WOULD HAVE HATED HER! -OH, YEAH! 194 00:08:19,583 --> 00:08:21,423 AH, BUT TYLER WAS SO MUCH FUN. 195 00:08:21,500 --> 00:08:23,380 YEAH, I REALLY WISH I WOULD HAVE SAVORED 196 00:08:23,458 --> 00:08:25,208 THOSE DAYS WITH AVERY WHEN SHE WAS LITTLE. 197 00:08:25,291 --> 00:08:27,211 WELL, THOSE DAYS ARE GONE, 198 00:08:27,291 --> 00:08:29,831 AND NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU MISS 'EM, YOU JUST CAN'T GET 'EM BACK. 199 00:08:29,917 --> 00:08:31,997 -I HAVE A QUESTION. -CHLOE, WHAT DID WE SAY 200 00:08:32,083 --> 00:08:33,083 ABOUT INTERRUPTING? 201 00:08:36,375 --> 00:08:39,285 HEY, CHLOE'S THAT AGE! WE COULD SAVOR HER! 202 00:08:39,375 --> 00:08:40,575 CHLOE! 203 00:08:41,208 --> 00:08:43,078 CHLOE! CHLOE! SWEETHEART, COME ON. 204 00:08:43,166 --> 00:08:45,126 OKAY. HONEY, WE LOVE YOU, 205 00:08:45,208 --> 00:08:47,538 AND WE WANNA HERE EVERYTHING YOU HAVE TO SAY. 206 00:08:47,625 --> 00:08:48,955 NOW, WHAT WAS YOUR QUESTION? 207 00:08:49,041 --> 00:08:51,461 MAKE IT CUTE! NO PRESSURE. GO! 208 00:08:52,083 --> 00:08:55,423 WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU FLUSH A TENNIS BALL DOWN THE TOILET? 209 00:08:56,125 --> 00:08:57,915 ( crashing sound ) 210 00:08:59,375 --> 00:09:01,535 NEVER MIND! 211 00:09:05,041 --> 00:09:06,541 Stan: NO DOGS ON THE COUCH, HUH? 212 00:09:08,542 --> 00:09:10,382 YEAH, I DON'T THINK SO. 213 00:09:10,458 --> 00:09:12,288 I'M ON THE COUCH! 214 00:09:12,375 --> 00:09:15,325 HEY, LOOK AT ME! I'M WALKIN' ON THE COUCH! 215 00:09:15,917 --> 00:09:17,997 I'M SHEDDING ON THE COUCH! 216 00:09:18,083 --> 00:09:20,043 WHOA-HO-HO YEAH! 217 00:09:21,959 --> 00:09:22,829 OH, NO! 218 00:09:31,166 --> 00:09:32,286 WHERE'S THE REST OF THE FAMILY? 219 00:09:32,375 --> 00:09:34,535 UH, THEY WENT OUT FOR ICE CREAM. 220 00:09:34,625 --> 00:09:37,205 SO... THEY'RE NOT COMING BACK FOR A WHILE? 221 00:09:37,291 --> 00:09:38,501 ( sighs ) NOPE. 222 00:09:39,291 --> 00:09:41,501 I'M WALKING ON THE COUCH! 223 00:09:42,583 --> 00:09:43,753 SO, WHY DIDN'T YOU GO WITH THEM? 224 00:09:43,834 --> 00:09:46,134 WELL, THEY WOULDN'T LET ME DRIVE, SO, WHAT'S THE POINT? 225 00:09:46,208 --> 00:09:48,078 WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL ABOUT DRIVING? 226 00:09:48,166 --> 00:09:49,916 STAN, IT'S A HUGE DEAL. 227 00:09:50,041 --> 00:09:52,171 WHEN YOU CAN DRIVE, YOU'RE FREE. 228 00:09:52,250 --> 00:09:53,710 YOU HAVE DIGNITY. 229 00:09:53,792 --> 00:09:55,792 IT'S LIKE YOU'VE BEEN ACCEPTED INTO THE WORLD. 230 00:09:55,875 --> 00:09:58,375 YOU KNOW, YOU'RE BEING TREATED LIKE A REAL PERSON. 231 00:09:58,750 --> 00:10:00,580 LIKE A REAL PERSON, HUH? 232 00:10:00,667 --> 00:10:02,207 OH, YEAH, IT'S THE BEST! 233 00:10:02,291 --> 00:10:05,711 IF HE WERE SMARTER, HE WOULD HAVE SEEN WHERE THIS WAS GOING. 234 00:10:09,750 --> 00:10:11,830 AH! I DO FEEL LIKE A REAL PERSON! 235 00:10:11,917 --> 00:10:13,377 THIS IS AWESOME! 236 00:10:13,709 --> 00:10:16,129 JUST ME AND THE OPEN ROAD, BABY! 237 00:10:16,208 --> 00:10:18,878 I GET IT NOW. THIS IS FREEDOM. 238 00:10:18,959 --> 00:10:22,249 THIS IS GONNA MAKE IT SO MUCH EASIER TO CHASE THE MAILMAN! 239 00:10:24,333 --> 00:10:26,423 HO-HO-HO! YEAH! 240 00:10:26,500 --> 00:10:27,710 THAT'S THE TICKET! 241 00:10:27,792 --> 00:10:29,922 WHY DOESN'T EVERYBODY DO THIS WHEN THEY DRIVE? 242 00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:31,630 WHOO-HOO-HOO-HOO! 243 00:10:31,709 --> 00:10:33,579 ( crash ) 244 00:10:33,959 --> 00:10:36,419 WHERE'S THE BLUE POOP BAG WHEN YOU NEED ONE? 245 00:10:40,750 --> 00:10:43,250 DID YOU ASK YOUR PARENTS? OKAY, FINE, I'LL ASK. 246 00:10:43,792 --> 00:10:46,002 HEY, DAD, CAN YOU TAKE LINDSEY AND ME FRIDAY NIGHT 247 00:10:46,083 --> 00:10:49,253 TO SEE NECROPOLIS HIGH II: ETERNAL PROMNATION? 248 00:10:49,750 --> 00:10:52,290 I'M SORRY, WE'VE GOT A BENEFIT AUCTION TO SAVE THE PLANET. 249 00:10:53,041 --> 00:10:54,751 HE HAS SOME STUPID THING THAT NIGHT. 250 00:10:56,250 --> 00:10:58,330 I'LL ASK. HOW ABOUT SATURDAY AFTERNOON? 251 00:10:58,417 --> 00:11:00,707 NOPE. CHLOE'S DANCE RECITAL'S SATURDAY. 252 00:11:01,500 --> 00:11:03,210 WE HAVE TO WATCH MY SISTER BUMP INTO HER FRIENDS 253 00:11:03,291 --> 00:11:04,921 ON STAGE FOR 10 MINUTES, 254 00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:06,670 AND THEN GIVE HER FLOWERS. 255 00:11:07,125 --> 00:11:10,375 HEY, SHE MAY BUMP, BUT SHE NEVER GOES DOWN, 256 00:11:10,458 --> 00:11:12,038 AND THAT'S WHY WE GIVE HER FLOWERS. 257 00:11:12,125 --> 00:11:15,705 ( sighs ) WELL, I GUESS WE'RE NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO GO SEE THE MOVIE THIS WEEK. 258 00:11:15,792 --> 00:11:18,292 BUT TYLER JUST GOT HIS LEARNER'S PERMIT, 259 00:11:18,375 --> 00:11:20,455 AND SOON HE'LL BE ABLE TO DRIVE US. 260 00:11:20,959 --> 00:11:22,289 NO, NO, NO, HE PASSED. 261 00:11:22,709 --> 00:11:23,829 NO, HE DID. 262 00:11:25,375 --> 00:11:28,165 YEAH, I KNOW. AT THIS RATE, THEY'LL BE LETTING FISH DRIVE. 263 00:11:28,959 --> 00:11:30,499 ALL RIGHT, BYE. 264 00:11:31,917 --> 00:11:35,537 OH, HEY, MY STEPBROTHER FROM ANOTHER MOTHER. 265 00:11:35,625 --> 00:11:38,705 I WAS JUST BRAGGING ABOUT YOU ON THE PHONE. 266 00:11:38,792 --> 00:11:39,882 I'M NOT DRIVING YOU ANYWHERE. 267 00:11:41,083 --> 00:11:43,003 'CAUSE YOU'LL BE DRIVING ME TO THE ZOO, 268 00:11:43,083 --> 00:11:45,883 AND THEN HOME, AND THEN BACK TO THE ZOO, 269 00:11:45,959 --> 00:11:48,829 'CAUSE I ALWAYS LAY MY SWEATSHIRT BY THE RHINOS. 270 00:11:49,333 --> 00:11:50,833 I'M NOT DRIVING EITHER OF YOU. 271 00:11:50,917 --> 00:11:52,247 TYLER, AS SOON AS IT'S LEGAL, 272 00:11:52,333 --> 00:11:54,673 YOU'RE GONNA BE DRIVING EVERYBODY EVERYWHERE. 273 00:11:54,750 --> 00:11:56,330 MY CHAUFFEUR DAYS ARE OVER. 274 00:11:56,417 --> 00:11:58,327 THAT'S NOT FAIR! THE FAIR'S IN POMONA... 275 00:11:58,417 --> 00:12:00,877 AND YOU'RE GONNA BE DRIVING THE GIRLS THERE AS WELL. 276 00:12:01,500 --> 00:12:05,330 -( overlapping chatter ) -OKAY, PEOPLE! 277 00:12:05,417 --> 00:12:06,827 WE'VE GOT A MAJOR SITUATION. 278 00:12:06,917 --> 00:12:08,997 SOMEONE CRASHED THE CAR. 279 00:12:11,083 --> 00:12:12,383 WHY IS EVERYONE LOOKING AT ME? 280 00:12:12,792 --> 00:12:14,672 MOM SAID SOMEONE CRASHED THE CAR. 281 00:12:14,750 --> 00:12:16,670 YOU OBVIOUSLY DID IT, SO WE'RE LOOKIN' AT YOU. 282 00:12:16,750 --> 00:12:17,920 PRETTY BASIC STUFF. 283 00:12:19,667 --> 00:12:20,997 I THINK I'M IN THE CLEAR. 284 00:12:21,083 --> 00:12:22,213 THEY BLAME A LOT OF THINGS ON THE DOG, 285 00:12:22,291 --> 00:12:24,671 BUT CRASHING CARS IS USUALLY NOT ONE OF THEM. 286 00:12:26,583 --> 00:12:30,253 AW! THIS IS GONNA COST A FORTUNE! 287 00:12:30,333 --> 00:12:32,463 THERE IS A TREE THROUGH THE WINDSHIELD! 288 00:12:32,542 --> 00:12:35,712 ON THE PLUS SIDE, IT'LL BE EASIER TO FIND IN THE PARKING LOT. 289 00:12:37,542 --> 00:12:39,252 DID YOU THINK WE WOULDN'T FIND OUT? 290 00:12:39,333 --> 00:12:42,333 I JUST FOUND OUT. I DIDN'T CRASH THE CAR! 291 00:12:42,417 --> 00:12:44,287 I DIDN'T DO IT. MOM DIDN'T DO IT. 292 00:12:44,375 --> 00:12:46,075 DOESN'T LEAVE A LOT OF OPTIONS. 293 00:12:46,166 --> 00:12:47,956 YEAH, YOU SAID YOU WANTED TO DRIVE ALONE 294 00:12:48,041 --> 00:12:50,171 WITHOUT US BUGGING YOU. OBVIOUSLY, THAT'S WHAT YOU DID. 295 00:12:50,250 --> 00:12:52,790 ( sighs ) THAT'S IT. YOU'RE NOT DRIVING ANYMORE. 296 00:12:52,875 --> 00:12:55,245 I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS. WERE YOUR HANDS EVEN AT TEN AND TWO? 297 00:12:56,250 --> 00:12:57,670 I WASN'T EVEN DRIVING! 298 00:12:57,750 --> 00:12:59,540 OH! NOW I FEEL BAD FOR TYLER. 299 00:12:59,625 --> 00:13:02,125 WHY'D HE HAVE TO GO AND CRASH THE CAR? 300 00:13:02,542 --> 00:13:04,292 OH. RIGHT. 301 00:13:05,208 --> 00:13:07,788 WHY DO YOU ASSUME IT WAS ME? MAYBE AVERY DID IT. 302 00:13:07,875 --> 00:13:11,415 OH, YEAH, RIGHT. I BROKE A RULE AND CRASHED A CAR. 303 00:13:11,500 --> 00:13:15,210 I ALSO KICKED A BUNNY AND BEAT A CLOWN WITH ITS OWN GIANT SHOE. 304 00:13:16,792 --> 00:13:18,042 WELL, WHAT ABOUT CHLOE? 305 00:13:18,125 --> 00:13:19,915 SHE'S ALWAYS DOING STUFF SHE'S NOT SUPPOSED TO. 306 00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:22,380 I NEVER EVEN THOUGHT OF DRIVING THE CAR-- 307 00:13:22,959 --> 00:13:24,289 TILL NOW! 308 00:13:25,083 --> 00:13:26,383 Both: NO! 309 00:13:27,875 --> 00:13:32,075 TYLER! COME ON! ACCUSING YOUR SISTERS LIKE THAT? 310 00:13:32,166 --> 00:13:33,706 WHY DON'T YOU JUST SAY THE DOG DID IT? 311 00:13:33,792 --> 00:13:37,882 GO BACK TO THE LITTLE GIRL. I-I DON'T THINK SHE'S BEEN QUESTIONED THOROUGHLY. 312 00:13:37,959 --> 00:13:40,789 THAT'S IT. SINCE YOU WON'T EVEN ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY, 313 00:13:40,875 --> 00:13:42,165 YOU'RE NOT DRIVING... 314 00:13:42,250 --> 00:13:44,170 AND YOU'RE GROUNDED FOR A MONTH! 315 00:13:44,250 --> 00:13:45,960 YOU NEVER BELIEVE ME! 316 00:13:46,083 --> 00:13:47,833 YES, I FLOODED THE BASEMENT, 317 00:13:47,917 --> 00:13:49,207 AND, YEAH, I BROKE THE KITCHEN WINDOW, 318 00:13:49,291 --> 00:13:50,541 AND, YEAH, I BLEW UP THE MICROWAVE, 319 00:13:50,625 --> 00:13:51,875 BUT I DIDN'T CRASH THE CAR! 320 00:13:51,959 --> 00:13:53,709 -YOU FLOODED THE BASEMENT? -YOU BLEW UP THE MICROWAVE? 321 00:13:53,792 --> 00:13:55,252 OH, SO NOW YOU BELIEVE ME! 322 00:13:56,542 --> 00:13:58,382 Stan: OH, THIS IS ALL MY FAULT. 323 00:13:58,458 --> 00:14:00,498 IF ONLY I NEVER DROVE THE CAR 324 00:14:00,583 --> 00:14:02,503 OR NEVER STUCK MY HEAD OUT THE WINDOW-- 325 00:14:02,583 --> 00:14:05,253 NO, THAT WAS COOL. I-I WOULD DO THAT AGAIN. 326 00:14:13,667 --> 00:14:15,247 AND THE COOL THING ABOUT AN ART WALL 327 00:14:15,333 --> 00:14:16,963 IS I CAN PAINT WHATEVER I WANT. 328 00:14:17,041 --> 00:14:18,881 I HAVE AN ART WALL IN MY ROOM, TOO. 329 00:14:19,250 --> 00:14:21,290 MOM AND DAD GAVE ME PERMISSION TO DO THIS. 330 00:14:21,625 --> 00:14:23,125 OH. 331 00:14:23,208 --> 00:14:24,628 CAN YOU HELP ME MOVE MY DRESSER? 332 00:14:26,834 --> 00:14:29,174 -YOU GUYS ARE TRAITORS. -WHAT DID I DO? 333 00:14:29,250 --> 00:14:31,460 NEITHER OF YOU BELIEVED I DIDN'T CRASH THE CAR. 334 00:14:31,542 --> 00:14:34,542 I'M MUST A KID. I BELIEVE WHAT EVERYONE ELSE BELIEVES. 335 00:14:34,625 --> 00:14:37,285 AND EVERYONE ELSE BELIEVES THAT YOU DID IT. 336 00:14:37,375 --> 00:14:38,955 TYLER, IT'S THE ONLY THING THAT MAKES SENSE. 337 00:14:39,041 --> 00:14:41,001 IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE. YOU SHOULD'VE HAD MY BACK. 338 00:14:41,083 --> 00:14:43,253 ( overlapping arguments ) 339 00:14:43,333 --> 00:14:45,673 AH, THEY'RE FIGHTING BECAUSE OF ME! 340 00:14:45,750 --> 00:14:47,250 THIS IS HORRIBLE! 341 00:14:47,333 --> 00:14:49,833 IF THIS GOES ON MUCH LONGER, I'M GONNA HAVE TO CONFESS. 342 00:14:49,917 --> 00:14:51,377 AH, BUT I'M SURE IT'LL BLOW OVER. 343 00:14:51,458 --> 00:14:52,878 I'M SURE THEY'LL MAKE UP. 344 00:14:52,959 --> 00:14:55,039 ( overlapping shouts ) 345 00:14:55,125 --> 00:14:57,285 LOOKS LIKE IT'S WINDING DOWN! 346 00:14:57,375 --> 00:14:59,705 THOSE ARE SCREAMS OF LOVE, RIGHT? 347 00:14:59,792 --> 00:15:02,002 DON'T TOUCH MY HAIR! DO NOT TOUCH-- 348 00:15:02,083 --> 00:15:03,673 ( sharp whistle ) 349 00:15:03,750 --> 00:15:05,670 HE CAN WHISTLE, TOO? 350 00:15:06,500 --> 00:15:08,380 I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. I DID IT. 351 00:15:08,500 --> 00:15:12,000 I WANTED TO BE LIKE A PERSON, AND I CRASHED THE CAR, OKAY? 352 00:15:12,083 --> 00:15:14,253 -YOU DID WHAT? -STAN! 353 00:15:14,333 --> 00:15:16,463 I'M SORRY, BUT IT'S NOT MY FAULT. 354 00:15:16,542 --> 00:15:18,672 IF IT'S NOT SAFE TO DRIVE WITH YOUR HEAD OUT THE WINDOW, 355 00:15:18,750 --> 00:15:20,540 THEN THEY SHOULDN'T LET DOGS DRIVE. 356 00:15:20,834 --> 00:15:21,674 THEY DON'T! 357 00:15:21,750 --> 00:15:23,130 THEN WHY DO I HAVE A LICENSE? 358 00:15:23,542 --> 00:15:25,042 A DOG LICENSE! 359 00:15:25,125 --> 00:15:26,415 WHATEVER! 360 00:15:27,417 --> 00:15:30,077 TYLER, I JUST ASSUMED IT WAS YOU. 361 00:15:30,166 --> 00:15:31,036 I'M REALLY SORRY. 362 00:15:31,959 --> 00:15:34,829 I'M NOT. STILL JUST A KID. 363 00:15:36,208 --> 00:15:38,878 STAN, YOU CAN'T DRIVE. YOU'RE A DOG. 364 00:15:38,959 --> 00:15:40,749 OH, RIGHT. I'M JUST A DOG. 365 00:15:40,834 --> 00:15:42,884 I CAN'T GO FOR A WALK WITHOUT A LEASH. 366 00:15:42,959 --> 00:15:44,709 I-I CAN'T DRIVE A CAR. 367 00:15:44,792 --> 00:15:46,252 I CAN'T REPROGRAM THE DVR. 368 00:15:46,333 --> 00:15:50,003 WAIT-- YOU'RE THE ONE WHO RECORDED TEN SHOWINGS OF MEET THE PARENTS? 369 00:15:50,083 --> 00:15:53,463 OH HO! I'M A SUCKER FOR ANYTHING WITH "MEAT" IN THE TITLE. 370 00:15:54,333 --> 00:15:55,713 STUPID HOMONYMS. 371 00:15:57,375 --> 00:15:59,995 WE HAVE BIGGER PROBLEMS THAN THE DVR. 372 00:16:00,083 --> 00:16:01,503 WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO? 373 00:16:01,583 --> 00:16:04,173 IT'S NOT FAIR FOR ME TO GET PUNISHED FOR THIS. 374 00:16:04,250 --> 00:16:05,880 WELL, WE CAN'T SAY STAN DID IT. 375 00:16:05,959 --> 00:16:08,749 WE HAVE TO KEEP THE SECRET THAT STAN IS SPECIAL, 376 00:16:08,834 --> 00:16:11,134 OR HE'LL GET TAKEN AWAY AND EXPERIMENTED ON. 377 00:16:11,959 --> 00:16:14,789 THEN I GUESS I CAN'T DRIVE AND I'M GROUNDED FOR A MONTH. 378 00:16:14,875 --> 00:16:16,915 NO, TYLER, THAT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN EITHER. 379 00:16:17,542 --> 00:16:19,632 LOOK, SOMEONE ELSE NEEDS TO CONFESS, 380 00:16:19,709 --> 00:16:22,579 SOMEONE MOM AND DAD WON'T BE AS HARD ON. 381 00:16:22,667 --> 00:16:25,127 AND I'M PERFECTLY PREPARED TO STEP FORWARD 382 00:16:25,208 --> 00:16:28,328 -AND SAY THAT CHLOE DID IT. -WHAT? WHY ME? 383 00:16:28,417 --> 00:16:31,877 THEY'LL GO THE EASIEST ON YOU. YOU SAID IT YOURSELF-- YOU'RE JUST A KID. 384 00:16:31,959 --> 00:16:33,459 I NEVER SAID THAT. 385 00:16:34,709 --> 00:16:37,419 CHLOE, YOU JUST HAVE TO MAKE THAT CUTE LITTLE POUTY FACE, 386 00:16:37,500 --> 00:16:38,790 BAT THOSE LITTLE EYELASHES. 387 00:16:38,875 --> 00:16:40,495 YOU'LL GET AWAY WITH ANYTHING. 388 00:16:41,041 --> 00:16:43,631 PLEASE DON'T LET AVERY SAY I DID IT. 389 00:16:45,125 --> 00:16:46,955 WELL, DON'T WORRY, I WON'T. 390 00:16:47,750 --> 00:16:48,580 SEE? 391 00:16:51,208 --> 00:16:53,788 HEY, WAIT, HAVE ANY OF YOU EVER SEEN THE MOVIE SPARTACUS? 392 00:16:56,542 --> 00:16:57,712 OF COURSE NOT. 393 00:16:59,500 --> 00:17:01,580 WELL, THERE'S THIS REBEL SLAVE NAMED SPARTACUS, 394 00:17:01,667 --> 00:17:03,627 AND THE ROMANS WANT TO FIND HIM, 395 00:17:03,709 --> 00:17:05,459 BUT ALL OF HIS FRIENDS STAND UP AND SAY, 396 00:17:05,542 --> 00:17:06,962 "I AM SPARTACUS!" 397 00:17:07,041 --> 00:17:10,381 "NO, I AM SPARTACUS!" "NO, I AM SPARTACUS!" 398 00:17:10,458 --> 00:17:11,788 "NO, I AM--" AND SO ON. 399 00:17:13,291 --> 00:17:16,421 SO... THEY CAN'T FIGURE OUT WHO THE REAL SPARTACUS WAS. 400 00:17:16,500 --> 00:17:17,670 SO, WHAT HAPPENED THEN? 401 00:17:17,750 --> 00:17:19,000 THEY KILLED ALL OF THEM. 402 00:17:19,667 --> 00:17:21,207 OKAY, LET'S GIVE IT A TRY. 403 00:17:23,083 --> 00:17:24,923 HEY, DID YOU CALL THE INSURANCE COMPANY? 404 00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:27,040 YEAH, THEY'RE SENDING SOMEONE OUT TO TAKE PICTURES. 405 00:17:27,125 --> 00:17:28,625 OH, SHOULD I CHANGE? 406 00:17:29,333 --> 00:17:30,963 OF THE CAR. 407 00:17:32,291 --> 00:17:33,791 OF COURSE. I KNEW THAT. 408 00:17:33,875 --> 00:17:35,875 SO, I REALIZED I NEVER SHOWED YOU THAT PHOTO 409 00:17:35,959 --> 00:17:37,749 OF ME AND AVERY AT THE PARK. 410 00:17:37,834 --> 00:17:40,254 OH, YEAH, I NEVER SHOWED YOU THE ONE OF ME AND TYLER. 411 00:17:40,667 --> 00:17:42,787 Stan: THIS IS THE MOMENT. THEY'RE HOLDING THE PICTURES. 412 00:17:42,875 --> 00:17:44,125 NOTHING COULD POSSIBLY STOP THEM 413 00:17:44,208 --> 00:17:46,538 FROM FIGURING OUT THEY'VE MET BEFORE. 414 00:17:47,125 --> 00:17:48,245 I DID IT. 415 00:17:48,333 --> 00:17:49,423 DID WHAT? 416 00:17:50,083 --> 00:17:51,173 I CRASHED THE CAR. 417 00:17:51,792 --> 00:17:53,382 LOOK, I WAS JEALOUS THAT TYLER WAS DRIVING, 418 00:17:53,458 --> 00:17:56,418 AND I WAS JUST GONNA GO DOWN THE DRIVEWAY, BUT I LOST CONTROL. 419 00:17:56,500 --> 00:17:57,920 HEY, DON'T LISTEN TO HER, OKAY? 420 00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:00,540 I DID IT. I'M SORRY I DENIED IT BEFORE, 421 00:18:00,625 --> 00:18:03,075 BUT I'M READY TO ACCEPT FULL RESPONSIBILITY. 422 00:18:03,458 --> 00:18:04,288 I... 423 00:18:04,750 --> 00:18:06,210 AM ASPARAGUS. 424 00:18:07,750 --> 00:18:11,880 I WAS PLAYING IN THE CAR, AND IT STARTED, AND I CRASHED. 425 00:18:11,959 --> 00:18:13,579 DON'T BE MAD. 426 00:18:15,709 --> 00:18:17,789 OKAY, WHAT IS GOING ON HERE? 427 00:18:19,250 --> 00:18:21,130 THEY'RE DOING SPARTACUS! 428 00:18:21,208 --> 00:18:24,168 I'M PRETTY SURE IT'S ASPARAGUS. 429 00:18:24,250 --> 00:18:26,670 THEY THINK IF THEY ALL CONFESS, 430 00:18:26,750 --> 00:18:28,330 WE WON'T BE ABLE TO TELL WHO DID IT. 431 00:18:28,417 --> 00:18:31,997 THAT IS SO SWEET THAT THEY ARE STICKING UP FOR EACH OTHER LIKE THAT. 432 00:18:32,083 --> 00:18:34,293 THEY ARE SUCH GOOD KIDS! I KNOW! 433 00:18:35,083 --> 00:18:38,083 SERIOUSLY, THOUGH, WHICH ONE OF YOU LITTLE MONSTERS WRECKED THE CAR? 434 00:18:38,166 --> 00:18:39,706 ( horn honks ) 435 00:18:39,792 --> 00:18:40,882 ( gasps ) THAT SOUNDS LIKE MY CAR! 436 00:18:41,750 --> 00:18:42,580 GO, GO! 437 00:18:49,041 --> 00:18:49,881 All: STAN! 438 00:18:49,959 --> 00:18:52,289 HERE GOES NOTHIN'! 439 00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:56,130 ( crash ) 440 00:18:56,208 --> 00:18:58,418 ( audible reactions ) 441 00:19:03,083 --> 00:19:05,003 THAT MUST HAVE BEEN WHAT HAPPENED THE FIRST TIME-- 442 00:19:05,083 --> 00:19:06,633 STAN GOT IN THE CAR. 443 00:19:06,709 --> 00:19:08,079 NONE OF YOU DID IT, DID YOU? 444 00:19:08,166 --> 00:19:09,626 NO, WE DIDN'T. 445 00:19:09,709 --> 00:19:12,629 STAN'S JUST A DOG. HE DOESN'T KNOW ANY BETTER. 446 00:19:12,709 --> 00:19:14,169 WE CAN'T EVEN BE MAD AT HIM, HON. 447 00:19:14,250 --> 00:19:15,670 OH, I'LL FIGURE OUT A WAY TO BE MAD. 448 00:19:15,750 --> 00:19:17,290 HE CHEWED UP MY THROW PILLOWS, 449 00:19:17,375 --> 00:19:18,915 HE'S CRASHED MY CAR TWICE, 450 00:19:18,959 --> 00:19:21,629 AND HE GIVES ME DIRTY LOOKS WHEN I DO MY BUTT FLEXES. 451 00:19:21,709 --> 00:19:25,879 AND CLENCH AND RELEASE, AND CLENCH AND RELEASE. 452 00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:28,170 YOU SEE? YOU SEE? 453 00:19:29,834 --> 00:19:33,044 SO, UH, WHICH ONE OF YOU LEFT THE CAR DOOR OPEN? 454 00:19:33,125 --> 00:19:35,495 -IT WASN'T ME. -IT CERTAINLY WASN'T ME. 455 00:19:35,583 --> 00:19:38,083 -YOU'VE BEEN KNOWN TO LEAVE THE DOOR OPEN. -NO, WHEN HAVE I EVER? 456 00:19:38,166 --> 00:19:40,746 GOOD BOY, STAN. YOU REALLY CAME THROUGH FOR US. 457 00:19:40,834 --> 00:19:42,754 AND AVERY, THANKS FOR HAVING MY BACK 458 00:19:42,834 --> 00:19:44,384 WITH THE WHOLE SPARTACUS THING. 459 00:19:45,041 --> 00:19:47,081 SOMETIMES WE NEED TO STICK TOGETHER-- 460 00:19:47,166 --> 00:19:49,826 LIKE WHEN SOMEONE NEEDS A RIDE SOMEWHERE! 461 00:19:49,917 --> 00:19:52,127 OKAY, I'LL DRIVE YOU ANYWHERE YOU WANT TO GO. 462 00:19:52,208 --> 00:19:53,748 EXCEPT A MOUNTAIN ROAD. 463 00:19:54,792 --> 00:19:57,422 AND STAN, OH, YOU WERE BRILLIANT. 464 00:19:57,500 --> 00:20:01,290 CAN I SAY YOU PAINTED MY BEDROOM WALLS? PLEASE? 465 00:20:02,166 --> 00:20:03,416 SURE. 466 00:20:03,500 --> 00:20:05,420 I'D TAKE A HIT FOR ANY OF THEM. 467 00:20:05,959 --> 00:20:07,789 THE KIDS REALLY STOOD BY ME. 468 00:20:07,875 --> 00:20:10,035 THEY WERE LOYAL, THEY WERE SELFLESS, 469 00:20:10,125 --> 00:20:12,575 THEY WERE PROTECTIVE. 470 00:20:12,667 --> 00:20:13,997 OH, MY GOSH-- 471 00:20:14,083 --> 00:20:15,753 I WAS TRYING TO BE LIKE A PERSON, 472 00:20:15,834 --> 00:20:17,634 AND THEY WERE BEING LIKE DOGS. 473 00:20:17,709 --> 00:20:19,629 MAYBE WE'RE NOT THAT FAR APART. 474 00:20:19,709 --> 00:20:21,129 SO, NEXT TIME I DRIVE, 475 00:20:21,208 --> 00:20:22,958 MAYBE THEY'LL STICK THEIR HEADS OUT THE WINDOW. 476 00:20:23,250 --> 00:20:24,420 MAYBE WE'RE NOT THAT FAR APART 477 00:20:25,208 --> 00:20:27,578 THERE'S SOMETHING FOR YOU TO CHEW ON. 478 00:20:28,250 --> 00:20:31,130 HEY! SOMETHING TO CHEW ON! 479 00:20:34,917 --> 00:20:36,537 THE LAST PIECE THAT CONNECTS THEIR PAST 480 00:20:36,625 --> 00:20:38,785 IS HANGING OFF MY LIP. 481 00:20:39,625 --> 00:20:40,825 OH, WELL. 482 00:20:44,667 --> 00:20:46,417 OKAY, UH... 483 00:20:46,500 --> 00:20:48,790 NOW, WHAT ARE THE ODDS THEY'LL THINK TYLER DID THIS? 484 00:20:55,166 --> 00:20:57,166 THIS IS SO GREAT THAT WE'RE DOING THIS. 485 00:20:57,250 --> 00:20:59,420 WE ARE BUILDING MEMORIES RIGHT NOW. 486 00:20:59,500 --> 00:21:01,330 I CAN'T WAIT UNTIL IT'S LATER 487 00:21:01,417 --> 00:21:03,077 AND WE CAN LOOK BACK ON THIS! 488 00:21:03,166 --> 00:21:05,666 HAVE MORE FUN! SMILE MORE! SAY SOMETHING ADORABLE! 489 00:21:05,750 --> 00:21:07,880 WE NEED SOMETHING TO SAVOR HERE. 490 00:21:07,959 --> 00:21:09,499 HOW DO YOU STOP THIS THING? 491 00:21:09,583 --> 00:21:11,043 OH, HOW PRECIOUS! 492 00:21:11,917 --> 00:21:13,917 HEY! 493 00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:15,630 THE DOG DID IT. 494 00:21:16,542 --> 00:21:18,212 WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING, KID. 495 00:21:18,291 --> 00:21:20,041 HEY! DON'T YELL AT HER. 496 00:21:20,125 --> 00:21:21,705 YOU'RE RUINING OUR MOMENT. 497 00:21:22,041 --> 00:21:23,881 THEN MAYBE I OUGHT TO YELL AT YOU. 498 00:21:23,959 --> 00:21:25,629 KEEP AN EYE ON YOUR KID! 499 00:21:26,458 --> 00:21:28,708 I PITY THE POOR SLOB WHO'S MARRIED TO HER. 500 00:21:28,792 --> 00:21:31,462 YEAH, IF I NEVER SEE HER AGAIN, IT'LL BE TOO SOON. 501 00:21:33,500 --> 00:21:34,540 Both: NAH. 502 00:21:36,375 --> 00:21:39,035 SERIOUSLY, AND YOU HAVE US AS PETS. 36978

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