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>> SO, PEOPLE ACTUALLY PAY
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MONEY, AND THEY BRING THEIR
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FAMILIES AND THEIR KIDS --
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>> ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
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THAT'S WHAT A ZOO IS?
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[ LAUGHS ] I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST
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A PRISON FOR CRAZY ANIMALS.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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[ BELL DINGS ]
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>> [ Swedish accent ] EVERYBODY,
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PUT DOWN YOUR KIBBLE!
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[ GUN COCKS ]
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>> OH, GOD! OH, GOD!
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DON'T HURT ME!
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HURT HER!
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>> DON'T WORRY.
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WE'RE NOT HERE FOR YOUR MONEY.
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WE'RE HERE FOR YOUR FOOD!
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GO!
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[ INDISTINCT TALKING ]
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>> GIVE ME THAT!
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>> I NEED THAT.
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>> BITCH!
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>> [ Muffled ] GIVE ME THAT
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BACK!
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>> TIME!
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WE'RE THE DOGGIE-BAG CREW.
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AS LONG AS SAN DIEGANS EAT FOOD
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WHILE THE SWEDISH PEOPLE GO
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HUNGRY, WE'LL TAKE THE FOOD
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RIGHT OUT OF YOUR MOUTH!
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[ EVIL LAUGHTER ]
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>> AREN'T YOU GONNA DO
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SOMETHING?
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>> ARE YOU KIDDING?
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THEY'RE WAY TOO FAST.
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>> NO, THEY'RE NOT.
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>> YOU GOT A LUCKY BOY THERE.
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>> I THINK WE CAN GET THEM.
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>> SHUT YOUR MOUTH, JOAN EMBERY.
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[ BELL DINGS, HORN HONKS ]
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>> [ LAUGHS ]
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>> THIS ISN'T OVER!
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YOU STOLE MY PORK CHOP!
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I WANT YOU DEAD!
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>> DIEGO!
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>> * OH-OH-OH, OH-OH-OH
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* OH-OH-OH, OH-OH-OH
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>> DIEGO!
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>> SO, THIS IS THE SECURITY
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FOOTAGE OF THE ROBBERY, HUH?
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WAIT. THAT'S NOT ME.
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>> Kove: THAT'S RIGHT.
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I HIRED A PRODUCTION TEAM TO
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WRITE AND SHOOT AN EXACT
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REPRODUCTION OF THE SURVEILLANCE
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TAPE IN THE SAME LOCATION WITH
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ACTORS.
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>> Sam: IT'S RIDICULOUSLY
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EXPENSIVE.
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>> Kove: I CAN'T STAND
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BLACK-AND-WHITE SECURITY
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FOOTAGE.
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>> Sam: OUR INTEL SHOWS THAT
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THIS DOGGIE-BAG CREW HAS BEEN
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STEALING FOOD FROM SAN DIEGO AND
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SENDING IT BACK TO THEIR HOME
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COUNTRY OF SWEDEN TO PREVENT
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FAMINE.
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>> [ SIGHS ] THESE SWEDES ARE
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KILLING ME.
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>> Kove: I CAN ASSURE YOU,
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MR. PRESIDENT, OUR ENTIRE TEAM
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IS FOCUSED ON THIS CASE.
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[ DANCE MUSIC PLAYS ]
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[ INDISTINCT TALKING ]
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>> YOU'RE NEW HERE.
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ARE YOU SWEDISH?
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>> Trent: YEAH.
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NAME'S OSLO.
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>> I LIKE YOUR ACCENT.
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>> Trent: THANKS.
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>> DO YOU V.R.?
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>> Trent: DOES THE SWEDISH
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GOVERNMENT INSTALL ELK FENCES ON
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THE SIDE OF THE HIGHWAYS TO
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PREVENT ELK ATTACKS?
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>> SOMETIMES, BUT THE
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EFFECTIVENESS HAS BEEN
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INCONCLUSIVELY PROVEN.
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>> Trent: GUESS I'LL JUST PUT ON
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THESE V.R. GLASSES.
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>> I HOPE YOU LIKE TO RACE.
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>> Trent: YEAH.
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>> THEY'RE UPSIDE DOWN.
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>> Trent: MAYBE YOU'RE UPSIDE
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DOWN.
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>> WELCOME, SWEDES!
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TONIGHT, WE BATTLE IN
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CYBERSPACE.
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[ CROWD CHEERS ]
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THE RULES ARE SIMPLE.
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THERE ARE NO RULES -- ONLY
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WINNERS AND LOSERS.
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DOES ANYONE DARE TO RACE THE
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UNDEFEATED...DOGGIE BAG CREW?
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>> Trent: I WILL.
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[ CROWD MURMURS ]
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>> DOGGIE BAG CREW, DO YOU
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ACCEPT?
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>> PREPARE TO BE KIPPERED,
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DUMSKALLE.
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[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
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>> ON YOUR MARK...GET SET...
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JACK IN!
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[ GAME MUSIC PLAYS, BEEPING ]
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[ CHEERING ]
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>> YEAH!
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[ LAUGHS MANIACALLY ]
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[ BIKE BELL RINGS ]
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>> Trent: YEAH!
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>> NO!
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AAH!
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NO!
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NO!
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NO-O.
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>> WINNER!
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>> THE...IS DEFEATED?
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>> NO!
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>> I LIKED YOUR MOVES OUT THERE.
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IT'S OBVIOUS YOU WANTED IT.
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>> Trent: SOMETIMES I LIKE TO
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FINISH ON TOP.
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>> SOMETIMES EVEN A TOP NEEDS TO
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EXPERIENCE A BOTTOM.
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I WANT YOU TO BE IN MY CREW.
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I WANT YOU IN MY INNER CIRCLE OF
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FRIENDS NO MATTER WHAT THE
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CONSEQUENCES!
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>> YES, BUT, SVEN, WE DON'T TAKE
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OUTSIDERS.
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>> RELAX, JORGEN.
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IF WE CLOSE OURSELVES OFF TO
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MYSTERIOUS STRANGERS, THEN WE'D
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NEVER LEARN ANYTHING.
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>> YES, BUT WE JUST MET THIS
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GUY.
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HE COULD BE A COP, SVEN.
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>> A COP? WITH THAT ASS?
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ARE YOU A COP?
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>> Trent: WITH THIS ASS?
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NO WAY.
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>> WORKS FOR ME.
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>> Sam: WE JUST GOT WORD FROM
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TRENT THAT HE'S INFILTRATED THE
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DOGGIE BAG CREW.
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>> HOW DO WE KNOW THAT THIS IS
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DEFINITELY THE SAME GANG?
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>> Sam: WELL, THEY'RE SWEDES,
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THEY RIDE MOTORCYCLES, AND THEY
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WEAR DOG MASKS.
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>> YOU JUST DESCRIBED EVERY
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SWEDISH PERSON IN THE WORLD.
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>> Sam: I THOUGHT YOU'D SAY
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THAT, WHICH IS WHY I CREATED A
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PROGRAM THAT ISOLATES AND
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MONITORS EVERY SWEDE IN
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SAN DIEGO.
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SO, IF THERE'S A SWEDE IN THIS
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CITY, WE'RE THERE.
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JESSIE AND PIPER ARE IN THE
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FIELD NOW, UNDERCOVER.
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>> WHAT KIND MASSAGE WOULD YOU
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LIKE?
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>> Jessie: SWEDISH.
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>> WHAT'S UP, NEWBIE?
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TONIGHT, A BUNCH OF US ARE GOING
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TO TIG BITTLY'S AFTER WORK FOR
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SOME ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT WINGS.
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YOU IN?
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>> Jessie: [ SPEAKS SWEDISH ]
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>> I DON'T SPEAK SWEDISH.
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>> Jessie: THEN HOW DID YOU KNOW
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I WAS SPEAKING SWEDISH?
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[ DANCE MUSIC PLAYING ]
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>> WE ARE THE SPOKES THAT TURN
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THE WHEEL OF LIFE THAT PUSHES
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THE CHASSIS THAT IS SWEDEN.
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AND TO PEDAL, WE NEED FOOD.
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>> Trent: RIGHT. [ CHUCKLES ]
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>> WE'RE FOOD LIBERATORS.
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>> Trent: YES.
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>> MAYBE YOU'VE HEARD OF US.
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WE ARE THE DOGGIE BAG CREW.
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[ LAUGHS ]
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WE NEED PEOPLE LIKE YOU TO HELP
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US KEEP MOTHER SWEDEN FED.
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IF YOU CAN PEDAL LIKE THAT,
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VIRTUALLY, IT WILL BE LIKE
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TAKING RHUBARB ICE CREAM FROM
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A BABY.
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[ LAUGHS ]
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>> Trent: YEAH. [ LAUGHS ]
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>> [ LAUGHS ] TRENT!
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>> Trent: YEAH?
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>> I CALLED YOU "TRENT HAUSER."
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YOU RESPONDED, YEAH?
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>> Trent: OH, IT SOUNDED LIKE
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YOU SAID, "OSLO."
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>> I SAID, "TRENT."
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>> I HEARD, "OSLO."
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>> Trent: YEAH, THERE YOU GO.
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>> OKAY, BUT, THEN, HOW ABOUT
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THIS?
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EXPLAIN THIS, TRENT.
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>> Trent: GOT THAT AT A TWO-BIT
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NOVELTY SHOP.
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>> NO, THIS IS A REAL NEWSPAPER.
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I'VE GOT YOU PRETTY CORNERED.
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THERE IS A QUOTE -- "HE'S AT HIS
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BEST WHEN HE'S GOING
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UNDERCOVER."
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>> Trent: THIS IS A NOVELTY GIFT
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I WAS GONNA GIVE YOU GUYS,
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'CAUSE, YOU KNOW, I'M NEW IN
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YOUR GANG, I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE
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FUNNY.
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[ BOTH LAUGH ]
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>> NO WAY.
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HEY, BUT THAT'S NOT RIGHT.
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THERE'S CLASSIFIED.
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THERE'S A LOT OF SECTIONS.
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THERE'S A SPORTS SECTIONS WITH
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THE SCORES FROM YESTERDAY'S
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GAME.
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>> Trent: PICKING AT STRAWS
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HERE -- I DON'T GO TO YOUR HOUSE
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AND, UH...
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HEY, LOOK --
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>> I'M GUARANTEEING HE'S POLICE
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OFFICER.
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LET'S GET AWAY FROM HIM.
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>> JORGEN IS JEALOUS.
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[ LAUGHS ]
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>> NO, I'M NOT JEALOUS.
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>> Trent: YOU ARE JEALOUS.
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>> JORGEN JEALOUS.
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>> I THINK WE'RE ALL BEST
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FRIENDS.
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>> ALL RIGHT, COME ON!
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IT IS ENOUGH WITH THE CONSPIRACY
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THEORIES.
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WE HAVE ACTUAL WORK TO DO.
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TOMORROW, WE HAVE OUR FINAL FOOD
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LIBERATION FROM RESTAURANT IN
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THE AFTERNOON.
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>> Trent: AFTERNOON?
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I THOUGHT WE ONLY ROB AT NIGHT.
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>> OH, NO, IT'S A CHANGE OF
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PLANS.
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[ HORN HONKS ]
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>> Trent: WATCH OUT, O'DONNELL!
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>> Kove: TRENT, GET OFF THAT
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PEDAL MOTORCYCLE.
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>> Trent: IT'S NOT A PEDAL
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MOTORCYCLE.
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IT'S A PEDICAB.
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>> Kove: WHAT'S THE NEW TARGET?
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>> Trent: I DON'T KNOW.
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THEY CHANGED PLANS.
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>> YOU DON'T KNOW?!
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WHAT KIND OF HILLBILLY OPERATION
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IS THIS?
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>> Trent: WAIT, YOU NEED TO
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RELAX.
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WE ARE BUT JUST THE GEARS ON
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THE BIKE OF LIFE.
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IF YOU SWITCH THOSE GEARS TOO
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EARLY, YOU POP THE CHAIN, IT
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TEARS APART.
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>> OH, MY GOD.
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YOU'RE BECOMING ONE OF THEM!
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WHAT ABOUT THE REST OF YOU?
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ANYBODY ELSE?
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PIPER, WHAT DO YOU HAVE?
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>> Piper: UGGHHH!
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I CAN'T EVEN THINK RIGHT NOW!
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AND I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU WOULD
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NAME A DESK "KLAUSNDK."
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>> JESSIE, TALK TO ME!
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>> Jessie: YOU'RE GETTING IT.
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[ CRACKING ]
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YEAH. YOU'RE REALLY GETTING IT.
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DO YOU HEAR THAT?
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THAT'S CRUNCHY, RIGHT?
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>> YEAH. YEAH.
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SHE'S REALLY TENSE.
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>> Kove: TRENT, YOU'RE OUR ONLY
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HOPE, BUT YOU HAVE TO GO IN
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WITHOUT BACKUP.
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YOU UP FOR THIS?
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>> Trent: JA.
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MM -- I MEAN, YES.
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[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]
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[ CLOWN HORN HONKS ]
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>> WHAT THE...?
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>> WHOA.
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[ CROWD MURMURS ]
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>> YOU KNOW WHO WE ARE...
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THE DOGGIE BAG CREW.
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[ GUN COCKS ]
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DROP YOUR WEAPONS. FBI.
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[ GUN COCKS ]
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>> INTERPOL!
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[ GUN COCKS ]
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>> MALL SECURITY.
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[ GUN COCKS ]
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>> Trent: NTSF:SD:SUV::.
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>> WE HAVE GOT TO DO BETTER
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BACKGROUND CHECKS!
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>> * WOULD YOU SHOOT A FRIEND
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AND END A FRIENDSHIP? *
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* WOULD YOU CAGE ME UP AND LET
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ME ROT AND DIE? *
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* YOU AND I ARE THE SAME, YOU
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KNOW YOU KNOW IT *
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* SO DON'T EVEN TRY TO DENY
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>> Trent: * IT'S MY JOB TO MAKE
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CRIMINALS PAY FOR THEIR CRIMES *
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* YOU MUST SUFFER THE PENALTY
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AND DO THE TI-I-I-ME *
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>> * COME WITH ME NOW,
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LEAVE YOUR BADGE BEHIND *
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* WE'LL RIDE AND ROB, OUR BOND
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WILL BE YOUR NEW JO-O-O-O-B *
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>> Trent: * I CAN'T
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>> * YOU CAN
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>> Trent: * I WANT TO
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>> * YOU WON'T
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* THEN LET ME GO
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>> Trent: WHERE'D HE GO?
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I'VE GOT YOU.
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>> YOU DIDN'T GET ME.
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I'M A POLICE OFFICER --
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SAN DIEGO P.D.
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>> Trent: IF YOU'RE A POLICE
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OFFICER, THEN WHERE'S YOUR
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BADGE?
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>> RIGHT HERE.
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>> Trent: GREAT FORGERY.
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>> AAH!
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>> [ SIGHS ]
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[ SCOFFS ]
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AGENT HAUSER.
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>> Trent: I THOUGHT I'D FIND YOU
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HERE.
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I'VE COME HERE FOR ONE THING --
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TO PUT YOU UNDER ARREST.
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* WE COULD HAVE HAD IT ALL, YOU
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AND I *
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* IF WE WERE BORN ON THE SAME
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SIDE OF THE TRACK *
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>> * BUT WHERE WE'RE GOING,
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THERE'S NO COMING BACK *
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>> Both: * NO COMING BA-A-A-CK
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>> [ GROANS ]
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>> Trent: [ EXHALES SHARPLY ]
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[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
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>> YEAH!
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KOVE, THAT WAS AMAZING!
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YOUR RE-ENACTMENT VIDEOS ARE
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JUST GETTING BETTER AND BETTER.
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>> Piper: AND I THOUGHT IT WAS A
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VERY COURAGEOUS CHOICE TO LET
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TRENT PLAY HIMSELF.
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>> Jessie: AND I CAN'T BELIEVE
377
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YOU LET SVEN PLAY SVEN.
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HE'S A NATURAL.
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>> Sam: GUYS, WE JUST GOT WORD
380
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BACK FROM SUNDANCE.
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>> Kove: OH.
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>> Sam: WE DIDN'T GET IN.
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>> OH, COME ON!
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>> Kove: FINE.
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WE'LL HIT SOUTH BY SOUTHWEST AND
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00:10:40,273 --> 00:10:41,913
SLAMDANCE, AND WE'LL HIT 'EM
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HARD.
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SAM, GET ME ALL THE DETAILS ON
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TORONTO A.S.A.P.
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THERE'S MORE THAN ONE PLAYER IN
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THE FESTIVAL CIRCUIT GAME.
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[ VIDEO GAME MUSIC PLAYS ]
23887
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