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00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:04,074
Subtitles downloaded from www.OpenSubtitles.org
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00:00:23,006 --> 00:00:24,021
Good evening.
3
00:00:24,094 --> 00:00:26,996
I'm just completing
a rather interesting device.
4
00:00:27,070 --> 00:00:28,379
I think it will amuse you.
5
00:00:31,455 --> 00:00:33,211
Tonight we are presenting
a story...
6
00:00:34,431 --> 00:00:35,958
I should have explained.
7
00:00:36,031 --> 00:00:37,340
You see,
this is arranged
8
00:00:37,407 --> 00:00:40,157
so that anyone touching
the channel selector
9
00:00:40,255 --> 00:00:41,749
to change programs
10
00:00:41,823 --> 00:00:43,546
gets a nasty shock.
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00:00:43,903 --> 00:00:46,587
We rather hope we will improve
the loyalty of our viewers.
12
00:00:48,159 --> 00:00:49,305
There goes another one.
13
00:00:49,376 --> 00:00:51,001
It's no trifling matter.
14
00:00:51,071 --> 00:00:53,527
25,000 volts.
15
00:00:53,888 --> 00:00:55,863
Leaves them crisp as bacon.
16
00:00:56,160 --> 00:00:58,549
Unfortunately,
it has one shortcoming.
17
00:00:58,624 --> 00:01:01,080
It also burns out
the television tube,
18
00:01:01,152 --> 00:01:03,291
making it impossible
for the bereaved
19
00:01:03,360 --> 00:01:04,440
to watch
the rest of the show.
20
00:01:05,665 --> 00:01:06,909
Well, nothing is perfect
21
00:01:06,977 --> 00:01:08,799
and there's nothing
like a good practical joke.
22
00:01:08,865 --> 00:01:11,680
At least that's what
a character
in tonight's play thought.
23
00:01:26,818 --> 00:01:28,706
Well, I said to him,
"Where you going?"
24
00:01:28,770 --> 00:01:29,817
He says,
"I don't know."
25
00:01:29,890 --> 00:01:31,516
The next thing I know,
he goes out the door,
26
00:01:31,587 --> 00:01:33,245
and that's the last time
I ever saw him.
27
00:01:36,419 --> 00:01:37,531
That's good.
28
00:01:37,603 --> 00:01:39,261
There you go, Nick,
put a head on it.
29
00:01:46,979 --> 00:01:48,321
Have another beer,
Mr. Halloran?
30
00:01:48,387 --> 00:01:49,882
I'll have another one.
31
00:01:50,180 --> 00:01:51,642
To you, Halloran,
32
00:01:51,715 --> 00:01:53,952
for teaching me two things
in my youth.
33
00:01:56,740 --> 00:01:58,529
This great newspaperman
34
00:01:58,596 --> 00:02:00,254
taught me
never to trust anyone,
35
00:02:00,324 --> 00:02:02,080
especially Mr. Halloran.
36
00:02:02,276 --> 00:02:03,934
But I told you
how to get a story.
37
00:02:04,004 --> 00:02:05,052
Yeah, for a price.
38
00:02:05,125 --> 00:02:06,172
How come?
39
00:02:06,245 --> 00:02:07,521
And what did
Mr. Halloran do?
40
00:02:07,589 --> 00:02:09,858
I was only 20 at the time,
just a cub on the gazette.
41
00:02:09,925 --> 00:02:12,675
I told him to go
to Machine Gun Riley
to get a story.
42
00:02:12,997 --> 00:02:15,299
I figured that Riley
would give the kid
the scare of his life
43
00:02:15,365 --> 00:02:17,023
and just toss him out
on his kisser.
44
00:02:17,093 --> 00:02:19,428
No, you didn't.
It was your idea of a joke.
45
00:02:19,590 --> 00:02:21,216
So, what happened?
46
00:02:21,477 --> 00:02:24,380
Machine Gun Riley
tossed me out of his
second story window
47
00:02:24,805 --> 00:02:26,496
I was in the hospital
for three months.
48
00:02:28,326 --> 00:02:31,360
Mr. Halloran, you haven't
changed in 20 years.
49
00:02:31,590 --> 00:02:32,899
Well, I mean well.
50
00:02:33,127 --> 00:02:35,363
I'm just a guy
who likes a practical joke.
51
00:02:36,230 --> 00:02:37,791
Sure,
you mean well.
52
00:02:38,119 --> 00:02:39,548
Your idea of
a practical joke is
53
00:02:39,623 --> 00:02:41,150
to get somebody
to break a leg.
54
00:02:42,311 --> 00:02:43,685
Well, good night,
you sadist.
55
00:02:43,751 --> 00:02:45,060
I gotta get
back to the desk.
56
00:02:45,127 --> 00:02:46,720
So long.
Good night, Jim.
57
00:02:48,071 --> 00:02:50,111
Any big headlines tonight,
Mr. Halloran?
58
00:02:50,183 --> 00:02:52,038
No. It's the deadest night
in years.
59
00:02:52,103 --> 00:02:54,209
Either a story breaks
or Answers to the Lovelorn
60
00:02:54,280 --> 00:02:56,800
will be the hottest news
in the 9 a.m. final.
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00:02:56,872 --> 00:02:58,017
Mr. Halloran...
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00:02:58,088 --> 00:03:00,510
Why, Johnny, my boy,
you woke up!
63
00:03:01,064 --> 00:03:02,177
Will you stake me
to a drink?
64
00:03:02,248 --> 00:03:03,557
Well,
sure, Johnny.
65
00:03:03,624 --> 00:03:04,573
Give him a drink.
66
00:03:04,649 --> 00:03:05,826
Oh, gee, thanks.
67
00:03:05,896 --> 00:03:07,358
What'll it be, John?
68
00:03:07,656 --> 00:03:09,566
Uh, could I...
Could I have the good stuff?
69
00:03:09,737 --> 00:03:11,809
Certainly.
Give him the good stuff.
70
00:03:21,322 --> 00:03:22,848
What's the matter, Johnny?
71
00:03:25,033 --> 00:03:27,041
You didn't have to
do that, Mr. Halloran.
72
00:03:27,114 --> 00:03:29,186
That wasn't funny.
I burnt my tongue.
73
00:03:30,282 --> 00:03:32,355
That was just
a little furniture polish.
74
00:03:32,426 --> 00:03:34,728
John,
here's the good stuff.
75
00:03:34,794 --> 00:03:35,776
And it's on the house.
76
00:03:35,850 --> 00:03:37,377
Oh, thanks a lot,
Nick.
77
00:03:37,451 --> 00:03:38,945
Mr. Halloran! Mr. Halloran!
78
00:03:39,019 --> 00:03:40,164
What's the matter,
Timothy?
79
00:03:40,235 --> 00:03:41,577
Hey, Mr. Halloran,
get a load of this.
80
00:03:41,643 --> 00:03:42,887
It's the morning edition.
81
00:03:42,955 --> 00:03:44,232
Let me see,
what is it?
82
00:03:44,299 --> 00:03:45,444
Let's see.
83
00:03:47,339 --> 00:03:50,339
"World ends tonight, 11:45."
84
00:03:50,411 --> 00:03:52,102
It must be a mistake.
85
00:03:52,171 --> 00:03:54,081
Let me read it.
Let me read it.
86
00:03:54,187 --> 00:03:55,780
What's the matter,
Mr. Halloran?
87
00:03:56,715 --> 00:03:58,122
"Collision with Mars.
88
00:03:59,020 --> 00:04:00,297
"Mars pulled
out of its orbit
89
00:04:00,364 --> 00:04:03,233
"by sudden gravitational shift
in the sun's powers."
90
00:04:03,692 --> 00:04:05,961
Go on.
What else
does it say?
91
00:04:06,028 --> 00:04:07,883
"Mars is pulling
toward the sun
92
00:04:07,948 --> 00:04:09,836
"and rushing for the Earth."
93
00:04:12,301 --> 00:04:14,505
It hits us
at 11:45 tonight.
94
00:04:17,037 --> 00:04:18,979
Gives us
only three hours.
95
00:04:20,462 --> 00:04:21,891
I ain't got my glasses on,
96
00:04:21,966 --> 00:04:24,454
but you say it's all
gonna happen in three hours?
97
00:04:26,477 --> 00:04:28,550
Three hours and goodbye.
98
00:04:28,622 --> 00:04:30,793
Well, maybe
it's just a scare.
99
00:04:30,862 --> 00:04:32,651
Yeah, yeah.
What do you think,
Mr. Halloran?
100
00:04:32,718 --> 00:04:34,180
I don't know.
It says right here
101
00:04:34,255 --> 00:04:37,004
Harvard University
and Palomar both confirm it.
102
00:04:37,966 --> 00:04:40,138
The best astronomers
in the country agree.
103
00:04:42,607 --> 00:04:43,555
Dead.
104
00:04:44,687 --> 00:04:46,443
All of us dead in three hours.
105
00:04:46,511 --> 00:04:49,359
Well, what are we gonna do,
Mr. Halloran?
106
00:04:53,359 --> 00:04:54,439
Where are you
going, Johnny?
107
00:04:54,512 --> 00:04:56,006
I don't know.
108
00:04:56,080 --> 00:04:57,509
If I only got
three hours to live,
109
00:04:57,584 --> 00:04:59,559
I guess I ought to do
something with them hours.
110
00:04:59,632 --> 00:05:02,566
Something I...
Well, I better hurry.
111
00:05:03,824 --> 00:05:05,580
But what are you
gonna do, John?
112
00:05:06,416 --> 00:05:07,627
I don't know.
113
00:05:17,041 --> 00:05:19,180
How that stumblebum
fell for it!
114
00:05:20,401 --> 00:05:22,027
The composing room
sure yelled about
115
00:05:22,098 --> 00:05:24,203
setting up extra type for
a limited edition of one.
116
00:05:24,274 --> 00:05:27,308
So what? Boy, I was scared
that Johnny would read
the rest of the page.
117
00:05:27,378 --> 00:05:30,192
But he hasn't got glasses.
That's what I was counting on.
118
00:05:30,546 --> 00:05:31,856
I wonder what he'll do.
119
00:05:31,922 --> 00:05:33,515
Who cares?
It was a great gag.
120
00:05:33,586 --> 00:05:35,561
You know,
he was mighty scared,
Mr. Halloran.
121
00:05:35,634 --> 00:05:37,358
What the devil's he got
to be scared about?
122
00:05:37,426 --> 00:05:38,987
His world
ended years ago.
123
00:05:39,058 --> 00:05:41,033
Set them up, Nick,
I'll stand the treat.
124
00:05:41,522 --> 00:05:43,792
Just seeing the expression
on the old guy's face
125
00:05:43,859 --> 00:05:45,320
was worth the trouble.
126
00:05:45,395 --> 00:05:46,770
End of the world.
127
00:06:00,596 --> 00:06:01,741
Mr. Stern.
128
00:06:03,636 --> 00:06:04,782
Mr. Stern.
129
00:06:05,620 --> 00:06:08,173
Oh, it's you, Johnny.
The usual half pint?
130
00:06:08,244 --> 00:06:09,706
Oh, I ain't got
any money.
131
00:06:10,164 --> 00:06:12,401
But that don't matter
no more, does it?
132
00:06:12,469 --> 00:06:15,818
I mean, seeing
as how we only got
a few hours left.
133
00:06:16,021 --> 00:06:17,331
What are you
gabbing about?
134
00:06:17,397 --> 00:06:19,153
Ain't you heard, Mr. Stern?
135
00:06:19,413 --> 00:06:21,682
The world's coming
to an end at 11:45.
136
00:06:22,613 --> 00:06:24,785
Sure, sure.
137
00:06:24,854 --> 00:06:26,512
So I tell you what, Johnny,
138
00:06:26,774 --> 00:06:29,163
because the world
is coming to an end,
139
00:06:29,238 --> 00:06:31,474
I'll put you on the cuff
for a half a pint.
140
00:06:31,926 --> 00:06:33,420
You can pay me next week.
141
00:06:33,494 --> 00:06:35,250
This ain't no time
to joke, Mr. Stern.
142
00:06:35,318 --> 00:06:37,261
Next week
we won't be here.
143
00:06:37,335 --> 00:06:39,539
Why can't you give me
some real good liquor?
144
00:06:39,607 --> 00:06:42,258
It can't make no difference
now to you or to me.
145
00:06:42,327 --> 00:06:45,262
All of us ought to do
something good for
the little time we got left,
146
00:06:45,334 --> 00:06:46,676
something decent.
147
00:06:47,927 --> 00:06:49,553
You could do me
a big favor.
148
00:06:49,976 --> 00:06:51,798
Just once more
before I die,
149
00:06:52,279 --> 00:06:54,418
I'd like to taste
fine stuff like that.
150
00:06:55,384 --> 00:06:57,806
There was a time
I used to drink
imported cognac,
151
00:06:57,879 --> 00:06:59,189
believe it or not.
152
00:06:59,639 --> 00:07:01,069
Look, Johnny,
153
00:07:01,144 --> 00:07:02,770
I'm taking inventory.
154
00:07:02,840 --> 00:07:06,135
It's late. I'm a busy man.
Leave me alone, huh?
155
00:07:07,096 --> 00:07:08,919
Now, take this
and leave.
156
00:07:24,857 --> 00:07:26,286
I said beat it, Johnny.
157
00:07:33,178 --> 00:07:34,804
You come back, Johnny!
158
00:07:35,066 --> 00:07:36,375
Come back here, Johnny!
159
00:07:44,506 --> 00:07:45,684
Give me the police.
160
00:08:01,468 --> 00:08:03,029
Can't let a man alone.
161
00:08:04,156 --> 00:08:05,563
Never did them no harm.
162
00:08:06,844 --> 00:08:08,819
It's no time
to be mean to anybody.
163
00:08:25,022 --> 00:08:27,891
Oh, dear,
I'm so sorry.
164
00:08:28,381 --> 00:08:30,421
You were taking wine
home for dinner?
165
00:08:31,038 --> 00:08:32,282
And the bottles
are all broken.
166
00:08:33,438 --> 00:08:36,307
And your nice coat
is all spotted!
167
00:08:37,759 --> 00:08:40,410
Yes, ma'am, wine.
168
00:08:41,022 --> 00:08:42,910
Well, I must
make amends.
169
00:08:43,871 --> 00:08:46,075
I only live
around the corner.
170
00:08:46,143 --> 00:08:47,867
I could clean your coat
171
00:08:47,935 --> 00:08:50,390
and give you
a nice hot cup of tea.
172
00:08:51,615 --> 00:08:54,168
Come, Fritzi,
that's a good girl.
173
00:08:54,239 --> 00:08:56,279
That's a good girl.
174
00:08:56,383 --> 00:08:57,725
Come on, Mimi.
175
00:08:59,743 --> 00:09:01,848
Here we are
at home at last.
176
00:09:02,592 --> 00:09:05,243
You come right along.
Here we go.
177
00:09:05,312 --> 00:09:08,312
Cheetah. Come on, Mimi.
Come along.
178
00:09:08,448 --> 00:09:09,910
That's it.
179
00:09:10,145 --> 00:09:12,600
Down we go,
and we're going right
into your room.
180
00:09:12,705 --> 00:09:15,454
Oh, uh, do make yourself
comfortable, Mr...
181
00:09:15,520 --> 00:09:16,600
Call me Johnny.
182
00:09:16,672 --> 00:09:19,389
Oh, no,
not on such short notice.
183
00:09:20,801 --> 00:09:22,460
I'm Miss Green.
184
00:09:22,561 --> 00:09:24,154
Felicia Green.
185
00:09:24,642 --> 00:09:27,260
Now, you all have
a lovely sleep
186
00:09:27,329 --> 00:09:29,184
and dream
about beautiful bones
187
00:09:29,249 --> 00:09:30,743
and nasty cats.
188
00:09:33,282 --> 00:09:34,492
May I help you?
189
00:09:34,594 --> 00:09:35,772
Oh, thank you.
190
00:09:37,186 --> 00:09:38,877
Tea next.
191
00:09:42,146 --> 00:09:43,324
Uh, Miss Green,
192
00:09:44,131 --> 00:09:45,374
what time is it?
193
00:09:45,443 --> 00:09:46,523
It's rather late.
194
00:09:46,594 --> 00:09:48,504
My clock says 10:10.
195
00:09:58,019 --> 00:09:59,514
Now, the kettle's on
196
00:09:59,587 --> 00:10:02,075
and soon we'll have
a sizzling cup of hot tea.
197
00:10:02,948 --> 00:10:05,796
Now, please, may I have
your jacket so I can clean it?
198
00:10:07,140 --> 00:10:08,733
Do as I say.
199
00:10:08,868 --> 00:10:10,395
I sure was lucky.
200
00:10:10,468 --> 00:10:11,548
Lucky? How?
201
00:10:11,620 --> 00:10:14,555
I mean, something
wonderful happening
at a time like this.
202
00:10:14,757 --> 00:10:15,967
What do you mean?
203
00:10:16,037 --> 00:10:17,019
I mean...
204
00:10:17,093 --> 00:10:18,915
Well, just when
it's all coming to an end.
205
00:10:18,980 --> 00:10:20,803
Whatever
is coming to an end?
206
00:10:20,869 --> 00:10:22,724
Oh, you ain't seen
the paper?
207
00:10:22,949 --> 00:10:24,193
No, I haven't.
208
00:10:24,357 --> 00:10:25,764
But what about
the paper?
209
00:10:25,829 --> 00:10:27,171
Well, I...
210
00:10:28,485 --> 00:10:29,762
The tea.
211
00:10:33,029 --> 00:10:34,556
What were you saying?
212
00:10:34,630 --> 00:10:36,191
It doesn't matter.
213
00:10:36,262 --> 00:10:37,407
Come in here.
214
00:10:39,431 --> 00:10:40,608
Sit there.
215
00:10:41,638 --> 00:10:42,718
Do sit down.
216
00:10:42,790 --> 00:10:43,870
Thank you.
217
00:10:50,983 --> 00:10:52,063
Thanks.
218
00:11:00,167 --> 00:11:01,760
You don't like tea?
219
00:11:01,831 --> 00:11:02,879
It's hot.
220
00:11:04,136 --> 00:11:06,340
Do you know,
you are the first gentleman
221
00:11:06,408 --> 00:11:09,092
in 15 years,
since Gregory,
222
00:11:09,160 --> 00:11:10,786
who's been allowed
in this house?
223
00:11:10,952 --> 00:11:12,032
Uh, Gregory?
224
00:11:12,104 --> 00:11:13,479
He's the largest one.
225
00:11:13,544 --> 00:11:16,064
The German shepherd
with the beautiful tail.
226
00:11:16,232 --> 00:11:18,654
I don't understand
how a nice lady like you,
227
00:11:18,729 --> 00:11:20,584
I mean,
isn't married.
228
00:11:21,641 --> 00:11:24,096
Well, when I was young,
I had high hopes.
229
00:11:24,169 --> 00:11:26,787
But then as the years passed,
no one asked.
230
00:11:27,849 --> 00:11:29,027
Do drink your tea.
231
00:11:29,546 --> 00:11:30,756
Ain't it been lonesome?
232
00:11:30,825 --> 00:11:32,232
Oh, gracious, no.
233
00:11:33,065 --> 00:11:34,276
With my church work
234
00:11:34,346 --> 00:11:36,801
and the dogs
and walking in the park...
235
00:11:37,386 --> 00:11:39,459
I don't have time
to be lonely.
236
00:11:40,138 --> 00:11:41,250
You've been lucky.
237
00:11:42,539 --> 00:11:43,651
Are you married?
238
00:11:44,234 --> 00:11:45,347
I was.
239
00:11:45,515 --> 00:11:46,463
Oh.
240
00:11:46,538 --> 00:11:48,131
She died, the baby died.
241
00:11:48,331 --> 00:11:49,411
Long ago?
242
00:11:49,482 --> 00:11:50,889
Thirty years.
243
00:11:51,723 --> 00:11:53,152
There's no one left?
244
00:11:53,611 --> 00:11:56,459
I got an older brother, Chuck,
I ain't seen years and years.
245
00:11:56,651 --> 00:11:57,599
Funny.
246
00:11:57,963 --> 00:12:00,297
I ain't thought about
any of it in a long time.
247
00:12:00,428 --> 00:12:04,356
Oh, I'm so sorry
to have asked you questions
248
00:12:04,427 --> 00:12:06,250
of such a personal nature.
249
00:12:06,316 --> 00:12:08,007
Oh, no. That's all right.
250
00:12:08,108 --> 00:12:10,629
It's just that I ain't had
nobody to talk with.
251
00:12:10,700 --> 00:12:12,325
I guess that's why
I ain't thought about her,
252
00:12:12,396 --> 00:12:13,706
or the baby or Chuck.
253
00:12:14,573 --> 00:12:16,034
When you ain't got
nobody to talk with,
254
00:12:16,108 --> 00:12:18,345
you don't do much
thinking or remembering.
255
00:12:21,517 --> 00:12:23,339
Is anything
the matter?
256
00:12:24,045 --> 00:12:25,059
Oh, no.
257
00:12:25,133 --> 00:12:26,115
Ma'am?
258
00:12:26,189 --> 00:12:27,204
Yes.
259
00:12:27,277 --> 00:12:28,422
Miss Green,
260
00:12:28,813 --> 00:12:31,334
could I put a little
something stronger
in this tea?
261
00:12:31,406 --> 00:12:33,894
Oh, dear.
If you must.
262
00:12:34,382 --> 00:12:35,429
Thank you.
263
00:12:42,766 --> 00:12:45,516
Oh, I wish you would have
just a little.
264
00:12:45,582 --> 00:12:47,044
It flavors the tea.
265
00:12:47,311 --> 00:12:49,896
Just perhaps
a few drops.
266
00:13:06,064 --> 00:13:07,624
Here, Johnny.
267
00:13:07,791 --> 00:13:09,864
The spots
are almost gone.
268
00:13:09,936 --> 00:13:11,659
Thanks, Felicia.
269
00:13:16,465 --> 00:13:18,570
Oh, what time is it?
270
00:13:19,568 --> 00:13:21,641
It's a little after
10:30.
271
00:13:22,257 --> 00:13:23,434
Is anything wrong?
272
00:13:23,760 --> 00:13:25,451
Do you have
an appointment?
273
00:13:25,521 --> 00:13:26,699
We all have.
274
00:13:27,185 --> 00:13:28,134
What do you mean?
275
00:13:28,209 --> 00:13:29,583
Oh, I ain't complaining.
276
00:13:29,649 --> 00:13:31,559
Nobody on earth is
as lucky as I am.
277
00:13:31,634 --> 00:13:34,285
Having somebody
like you to be with
until the world ends.
278
00:13:34,418 --> 00:13:35,563
What did you say?
279
00:13:35,633 --> 00:13:37,488
I thought
I'd end my days alone.
280
00:13:37,553 --> 00:13:40,401
But now I'll be with you
until it's all over.
281
00:13:40,466 --> 00:13:42,408
I don't know
what you mean,
282
00:13:42,482 --> 00:13:44,337
but you can't stay here
in this house.
283
00:13:44,402 --> 00:13:46,093
It's quite unthinkable.
284
00:13:46,162 --> 00:13:48,618
Look, Felicia,
we're both in the same boat.
285
00:13:48,690 --> 00:13:50,479
Isn't it good to know that
you'll be with someone
286
00:13:50,546 --> 00:13:52,008
till the whole world blows up?
287
00:13:52,083 --> 00:13:53,327
And us with it, dead?
288
00:13:53,555 --> 00:13:56,043
It should make you feel
kind of peaceful.
289
00:13:56,115 --> 00:13:57,293
It does me.
290
00:13:57,619 --> 00:13:59,823
You and me together
until it's all over.
291
00:13:59,891 --> 00:14:01,298
You mustn't talk like that.
292
00:14:01,555 --> 00:14:03,213
You mustn't talk like that.
293
00:14:03,283 --> 00:14:04,592
You don't get it.
294
00:14:05,492 --> 00:14:06,801
I may not be the best.
295
00:14:06,867 --> 00:14:09,289
I mean, I may not be
the finest guy
to end your days with,
296
00:14:09,364 --> 00:14:10,312
but look, Felicia...
297
00:14:10,388 --> 00:14:11,665
You are insane.
298
00:14:11,732 --> 00:14:13,106
You're insane!
299
00:14:13,172 --> 00:14:15,027
No, no. No,
you don't understand.
300
00:14:15,093 --> 00:14:16,238
No, no!
301
00:14:16,308 --> 00:14:18,195
Help, help!
302
00:14:19,860 --> 00:14:21,519
Help!
What's going on here?
303
00:14:21,589 --> 00:14:24,174
Get him out of here.
He's insane.
304
00:14:24,309 --> 00:14:25,836
She doesn't understand.
305
00:14:25,908 --> 00:14:27,534
The world's coming
to an end at 11:45.
306
00:14:27,605 --> 00:14:30,027
I know your kind.
And such a nice lady, too!
307
00:14:30,102 --> 00:14:31,793
Don't worry, ma'am,
I'll call the cops.
308
00:14:31,862 --> 00:14:33,323
Come along, you...
309
00:14:34,453 --> 00:14:35,533
Hey!
310
00:14:37,398 --> 00:14:38,575
I'm sorry.
311
00:14:43,543 --> 00:14:46,063
Hello, Operator?
Police, please.
312
00:15:30,329 --> 00:15:32,468
Nothing I do is right.
313
00:15:32,537 --> 00:15:35,188
A guy tries to do decent
the last night of his life...
314
00:15:35,705 --> 00:15:37,877
Nothing goes right. Nothing.
315
00:15:46,106 --> 00:15:48,408
What's the matter, mister?
You sick or something?
316
00:15:49,019 --> 00:15:50,393
Hello, kids.
317
00:15:50,458 --> 00:15:51,865
No, no.
I'm okay.
318
00:15:52,570 --> 00:15:54,709
What are you doing
in this alley
so late at night?
319
00:15:54,779 --> 00:15:56,405
You ought to be home
with your folks.
320
00:15:56,475 --> 00:15:58,384
Sure, right now
you ought to be
with your family.
321
00:15:58,459 --> 00:16:00,434
That's a joke, mister.
We ain't got no family.
322
00:16:00,507 --> 00:16:01,783
We ain't got nobody.
323
00:16:02,907 --> 00:16:04,282
11:00.
324
00:16:04,892 --> 00:16:06,102
Less than an hour.
325
00:16:06,812 --> 00:16:08,056
What's the matter, mister?
326
00:16:08,124 --> 00:16:09,204
You're
the youngest?
327
00:16:09,276 --> 00:16:10,291
Yeah, I'm eight.
328
00:16:10,363 --> 00:16:11,378
Eight.
329
00:16:11,452 --> 00:16:13,241
I had a dirty face
and a cowlick
330
00:16:13,308 --> 00:16:14,715
when I was eight, too.
331
00:16:16,284 --> 00:16:17,364
Gee.
332
00:16:18,492 --> 00:16:21,110
What would you kids like more
than anything in the world?
333
00:16:21,180 --> 00:16:22,260
Name it.
334
00:16:22,332 --> 00:16:24,307
A rifle,
a hunting rifle.
335
00:16:24,381 --> 00:16:25,559
A basketball.
336
00:16:25,629 --> 00:16:28,411
Gee, mister, if you knew
how I want a basketball!
337
00:16:28,989 --> 00:16:30,331
And you, son?
What about you?
338
00:16:30,397 --> 00:16:31,412
Me?
339
00:16:31,485 --> 00:16:32,565
Yeah,
what would you like?
340
00:16:32,637 --> 00:16:33,619
I don't know.
341
00:16:33,694 --> 00:16:36,628
Maybe a baseball bat
and a glove and a ball?
342
00:16:36,797 --> 00:16:38,324
Or maybe a bicycle,
343
00:16:38,397 --> 00:16:40,153
like I wanted
when I was your age.
344
00:16:40,221 --> 00:16:42,643
Come on, kids.
You're all gonna get
whatever you want!
345
00:16:42,718 --> 00:16:44,409
Come on!
What?
346
00:16:44,478 --> 00:16:45,460
You're kidding.
347
00:16:45,534 --> 00:16:47,225
No, I'm not kidding.
I mean it.
348
00:17:31,073 --> 00:17:32,502
Gee whiz!
349
00:17:32,833 --> 00:17:34,808
Come and get 'em, kids.
Come and get 'em!
350
00:17:48,931 --> 00:17:50,392
Which one?
Which one?
351
00:17:50,466 --> 00:17:53,052
Gee, I don't know, mister.
They're all so swell.
352
00:17:53,123 --> 00:17:54,879
Take 'em all.
Take 'em all.
353
00:17:56,066 --> 00:17:57,244
Bang! Bang! Bang!
354
00:17:57,315 --> 00:17:59,737
Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!
355
00:18:00,227 --> 00:18:01,656
You happy, kid?
Happy?
356
00:18:01,731 --> 00:18:03,072
Gee, sure!
357
00:18:03,747 --> 00:18:04,925
Come on!
358
00:18:05,923 --> 00:18:07,330
Boy, a radio!
359
00:18:07,395 --> 00:18:10,112
Come on!
Here, try it, kid. Try it.
360
00:18:11,556 --> 00:18:12,701
Good.
361
00:18:12,772 --> 00:18:15,522
Three, five...
362
00:18:17,060 --> 00:18:18,238
Bull's eye!
363
00:18:18,308 --> 00:18:19,552
Great!
364
00:18:19,620 --> 00:18:21,409
Let's try it again.
365
00:18:25,924 --> 00:18:27,102
Great!
366
00:18:29,316 --> 00:18:32,383
Let me ride!
Let me ride.
367
00:18:34,501 --> 00:18:35,581
Let me ride.
368
00:18:39,046 --> 00:18:41,282
It's wonderful,
ain't it, kids? Wonderful.
369
00:18:44,550 --> 00:18:46,208
Look, mister, look!
370
00:18:46,918 --> 00:18:47,998
Hey, mister, look!
371
00:18:52,422 --> 00:18:54,080
Gee, this is a beauty.
372
00:18:54,151 --> 00:18:56,060
It's an automatic.
But it ain't loaded.
373
00:18:56,391 --> 00:18:58,049
That's easy. Let's load it.
374
00:19:10,792 --> 00:19:11,904
Hey, look!
375
00:19:31,081 --> 00:19:32,029
No, you don't.
376
00:19:32,105 --> 00:19:34,309
Don't hurt me, mister,
don't hurt me!
Don't move!
377
00:19:34,377 --> 00:19:35,970
This ain't no time
to go hurting a kid.
378
00:19:36,041 --> 00:19:37,951
Leave him alone,
you hear me?
Leave him alone!
379
00:19:38,026 --> 00:19:39,619
Just stay where you are
till the cops come.
380
00:19:39,690 --> 00:19:41,959
The world coming to an end,
you keeping kids
from being happy.
381
00:19:42,025 --> 00:19:44,229
They only got
a few minutes and you
take it away from them.
382
00:19:44,297 --> 00:19:47,167
You let that kid go,
do you hear me?
You let that kid go!
383
00:19:48,266 --> 00:19:50,022
Don't come near me.
384
00:19:50,666 --> 00:19:53,121
Don't. Don't. Don't.
385
00:19:57,579 --> 00:19:58,921
Hey,
let's beat it.
386
00:19:58,987 --> 00:20:00,099
Yeah.
387
00:21:16,719 --> 00:21:18,061
Where's
the latest one?
388
00:21:18,128 --> 00:21:19,535
What do you mean,
bud?
389
00:21:19,792 --> 00:21:20,807
The real headline.
390
00:21:20,880 --> 00:21:22,636
The one about
the world coming to an end.
391
00:21:22,704 --> 00:21:23,915
You screwy
or something?
392
00:21:23,985 --> 00:21:25,097
Stop fooling me.
393
00:21:25,297 --> 00:21:27,850
There ain't no time.
I saw it right in the paper.
394
00:21:27,921 --> 00:21:29,481
Look, you got
all three newspapers
395
00:21:29,552 --> 00:21:31,789
right in front of you
with all the latest news.
396
00:21:31,857 --> 00:21:33,646
Now which one
you gonna buy?
397
00:21:50,130 --> 00:21:51,112
What's wild?
398
00:21:51,186 --> 00:21:52,396
One-eyed jacks.
399
00:21:52,754 --> 00:21:53,736
Cards.
400
00:21:53,810 --> 00:21:55,054
I'm out.
401
00:21:55,250 --> 00:21:57,356
I'll take one off the top.
Good one.
402
00:21:58,643 --> 00:22:00,137
Another round,
Mr. Halloran?
403
00:22:00,307 --> 00:22:03,122
Yeah, Nick, and listen,
call up the hamburger joint
404
00:22:03,187 --> 00:22:04,332
and order
a load of sandwiches.
405
00:22:04,403 --> 00:22:05,581
Okay,
Mr. Halloran.
406
00:22:05,843 --> 00:22:06,857
Your bet.
407
00:22:17,715 --> 00:22:18,730
Mr. Halloran.
408
00:22:21,172 --> 00:22:24,107
Why, look, Johnny,
it was only a joke.
409
00:22:24,180 --> 00:22:26,602
But every joke's gotta have
a payoff, Mr. Halloran.
410
00:22:26,868 --> 00:22:28,559
This joke's gotta
have a payoff, too.
411
00:22:45,141 --> 00:22:48,108
Well, it couldn't have
happened to a nicer fellow.
412
00:22:48,629 --> 00:22:49,840
Unfortunately,
413
00:22:49,910 --> 00:22:52,976
justice had to be
meted out to Johnny Gin.
414
00:22:53,046 --> 00:22:55,632
However, that is all
for this evening.
415
00:22:55,702 --> 00:22:57,557
I hope
you'll join us next time
416
00:22:57,622 --> 00:22:59,597
when we shall return
with another story.
417
00:22:59,670 --> 00:23:03,151
We also hope to have
the bugs out
of this little device.
418
00:23:03,223 --> 00:23:04,368
Good night.
419
00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:08,076
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