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[Meredith] The dictionary definesgrief as,
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00:00:04,911 --> 00:00:09,041
"Keen mental suffering or distress
over affliction or loss...
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00:00:11,084 --> 00:00:12,252
sharp sorrow...
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00:00:12,961 --> 00:00:14,046
painful regret. "
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["Ghosts" playing]
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As surgeons, as scientists,
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we're taught to learn from
and rely on books,
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on definitions, on definitives.
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But in life,
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strict definitions rarely apply.
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In life, grief can look like
a lot of things
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that bear little resemblance
to "sharp sorrow".
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"You're not missing much.
New York smells like pee."
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[Lexie laughs]
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God, I hate them. [grunts]
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00:00:52,626 --> 00:00:56,463
More pain?
Your CT results should be back soon.
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00:00:56,713 --> 00:00:57,756
I'm fine.
18
00:00:59,841 --> 00:01:01,593
You should go home tonight.
19
00:01:02,302 --> 00:01:06,014
You can call off the 24-hour
suicide watch, you know. Honestly.
20
00:01:06,223 --> 00:01:08,433
I'm better now. I am.
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Do you know what I think?
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I think you're using me to avoid
moving in with your boyfriend.
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- [scoffs] Am not.
- I'll make you a deal.
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You move in with your boyfriend,
and I'll let you call my mum.
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- Oh, mean. [chuckles]
- Chicken.
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00:01:26,076 --> 00:01:31,540
OK, Clara, the CT shows you have
an infection in your small bowel,
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and your colon's inflamed.
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It's most likely something you picked up
in the water,
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00:01:35,585 --> 00:01:38,672
but it seems to have formed an abscess,
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which means you need surgery right away.
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No.
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- Uh, if we don't...
- No. No more surgery.
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- I'm not being cut open again.
- OK, uh...
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- No.
- You just take a minute.
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Take a few minutes
and I'll come back and we'll discuss it.
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Um... Start her on pre-op
antibiotics and book an OR.
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What are the options?
Can you give me drugs, can you...
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00:02:08,577 --> 00:02:12,122
No. You need surgery.
But it's a simple procedure,
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and if it goes as planned...
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But my boat ride didn't exactly go
as planned.
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[Clara] So... tell me.
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Worst case.
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Well, uh, worst case is...
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that we have to take out a part of
your colon and give you a colostomy bag.
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Colostomy bag?
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A poo bag, outside your body?
My granddad had one of those, it was...
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- No, it's a small, small possibility.
- No. No poo bag.
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- No surgery.
- The infection will kill you, Clara.
49
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No! No more surgery.
50
00:02:48,867 --> 00:02:49,785
No.
51
00:02:55,165 --> 00:02:58,084
We tried pain meds,
treated him for pyelonephritis,
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00:02:58,168 --> 00:03:01,296
but it looks like it could be
something more serious, so we did a CMG.
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00:03:01,379 --> 00:03:04,216
You did a CMG for a UTI? Why would you
even look for something?
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Because we were out of ideas!
The CMG was negative
55
00:03:07,135 --> 00:03:09,012
so we went back to
a possible neurological cause.
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00:03:09,679 --> 00:03:12,098
So if we could get a better look,
if you could give us permission
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00:03:12,182 --> 00:03:14,976
to get a 3D MRI,
we could maybe, just possibly...
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[Alex] Chief, this kid's been in the ER
four times in the last three weeks.
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00:03:18,396 --> 00:03:20,607
Because the pain meds aren't working.
Why can't we...
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00:03:20,690 --> 00:03:22,859
- Five thousand dollars, Karev.
- Sir?
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00:03:22,943 --> 00:03:26,404
That's how much either you or Dr. Robbins
will have to put up to cover that scan.
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Otherwise, you can come with me
to my board meeting this afternoon
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00:03:29,699 --> 00:03:32,661
and explain why you're running
this hospital like it's a charity.
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00:03:33,370 --> 00:03:36,414
[door opens, closes]
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- Dude, are you crying?
- I have authority issues.
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Walk away, Karev.
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Where do you get off
killing my patients, Yang?
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- Killing?
- When you take it upon yourself
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00:03:53,890 --> 00:03:56,726
to talk that girl out of a life-saving
surgery, you're killing her.
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00:03:56,810 --> 00:03:58,311
I didn't talk her...
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00:03:59,187 --> 00:04:02,023
She had questions about the surgery.
You left the room.
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00:04:02,107 --> 00:04:06,194
I left the room to give a very fragile,
very distraught patient
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00:04:06,278 --> 00:04:08,864
time and space to accept
what's being asked of her.
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00:04:08,947 --> 00:04:12,701
Then, and only then would I have
discussed the possible risks with,
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00:04:12,784 --> 00:04:15,912
I'm certain, more tact and sensitivity
than you have ever displayed
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00:04:15,996 --> 00:04:18,081
- in all the time I've known you.
- She asked...
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I don't care what she asked you,
and if she asked you anything else,
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00:04:21,835 --> 00:04:25,255
your only answer will be,
"Let me ask my attending."
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These are good.
Do they sell these in the cafeteria?
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00:04:38,059 --> 00:04:39,269
- No.
- No.
81
00:04:39,352 --> 00:04:42,939
- Those are the cancer pops.
- Why do cancer people get all the fun?
82
00:04:47,110 --> 00:04:48,236
How do you feel, Iz?
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00:04:48,403 --> 00:04:50,030
Not looking forward to the hurling
that's about to happen,
84
00:04:50,113 --> 00:04:51,865
but I feel OK, I feel good.
85
00:04:51,948 --> 00:04:53,742
Bailey's on some sort of rampage.
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00:04:54,117 --> 00:04:57,120
[laughs] I think it's
Post-O'Malley Stress Disorder.
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00:04:59,623 --> 00:05:02,292
- She's not dealing with her grief.
- You sound like Owen's shrink.
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Owen's shrink is withholding sex.
So she is grumpy
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00:05:06,880 --> 00:05:09,132
- and inappropriate.
- [Izzie] Is Derek doing that, too?
90
00:05:09,424 --> 00:05:12,010
- Withholding sex?
- Why would Derek withhold sex?
91
00:05:12,093 --> 00:05:15,639
Alex is withholding everything.
It's like he's afraid,
92
00:05:15,722 --> 00:05:18,183
- but I don't know what he's afraid of.
- He's afraid of the cancer sex.
93
00:05:18,266 --> 00:05:19,142
[Meredith] Cristina!
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He doesn't want to end up
with a cancer pop.
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00:05:20,894 --> 00:05:23,021
- Cristina!
- Just shut the hell up.
96
00:05:23,104 --> 00:05:26,524
- I'm not contagious, Cristina.
- I know that.
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00:05:26,733 --> 00:05:28,109
I would totally have sex with you.
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00:05:30,987 --> 00:05:33,615
- Really? Nothing?
- No.
99
00:05:33,698 --> 00:05:35,700
- You don't even want a drawer?
- No.
100
00:05:35,867 --> 00:05:38,411
- A toothbrush? Change of panties?
- No.
101
00:05:38,828 --> 00:05:42,749
- Damn. I like your panties.
- I am trying to focus.
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I'm becoming a resident today.
I need to focus.
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00:05:46,127 --> 00:05:47,879
I'm right across the street
from the hospital.
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If you crash here sometimes,
105
00:05:49,297 --> 00:05:52,842
- you'll get a jump on a lot of surgeries.
- OK, OK. Which one?
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00:05:52,926 --> 00:05:55,679
It's my first day at Mercy West.
I wanna look nice, you know,
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serious, talented, hardcore,
not someone you push around.
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Nice, but hot. Like me.
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- That one.
- [Callie] Really? I thought this one.
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00:06:07,315 --> 00:06:09,526
Mm-hmm. Too hot.
Better for a date. That one.
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00:06:09,901 --> 00:06:12,404
OK. Here. Eh, thanks.
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[Callie groans]
113
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[playful music playing]
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00:06:23,581 --> 00:06:25,959
OK. OK.
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00:06:26,584 --> 00:06:27,836
- Less hot?
- Less hot.
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00:06:27,919 --> 00:06:30,005
OK. Good.
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00:06:30,088 --> 00:06:31,381
Thanks. Wish me luck.
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00:06:31,464 --> 00:06:35,468
Or not luck,
'cause I'm all talented and hardcore.
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00:06:35,552 --> 00:06:37,554
You're an attending, Torres.
Go kick some ass.
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00:06:42,183 --> 00:06:43,935
So, um...
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00:06:44,894 --> 00:06:49,232
Did you forget to mention
that your hot, hardcore ex
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00:06:49,691 --> 00:06:52,360
sex friend lives right across the hall?
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00:06:53,069 --> 00:06:55,905
- Did I?
- Yeah. Yeah, you did.
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00:06:57,073 --> 00:06:59,492
[Richard] And it is only
under my tenure as chief
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00:06:59,868 --> 00:07:03,830
that Seattle Grace has grown
into one of the most renowned,
126
00:07:03,955 --> 00:07:07,083
lauded and sought after
surgical centers in the country.
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00:07:08,001 --> 00:07:10,712
Replacing me... no.
128
00:07:11,004 --> 00:07:13,757
Disrupting that process
would be an epic mistake.
129
00:07:14,215 --> 00:07:17,552
It is for that reason
that I stand before you today
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00:07:17,635 --> 00:07:19,429
and say with the utmost confidence
131
00:07:19,512 --> 00:07:22,682
that there is no one
who understands and cares more
132
00:07:22,766 --> 00:07:24,142
about Seattle Grace than...
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00:07:24,225 --> 00:07:25,769
- [horn honks]
- [tires screech]
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00:07:27,187 --> 00:07:29,397
- Than me.
- [hubcap clatters]
135
00:07:36,433 --> 00:07:38,935
{\an8}[Richard] Look, this is ridiculous.
I'm fine.
136
00:07:39,019 --> 00:07:42,397
{\an8}It's a sprained ankle.
And I have a meeting I have to get to.
137
00:07:42,481 --> 00:07:45,067
{\an8}- Look, I said I'm fine.
- Chief?
138
00:07:45,150 --> 00:07:48,028
{\an8}- Torres, thank God.
- [Callie] You were in a car accident?
139
00:07:48,153 --> 00:07:51,656
{\an8}Yeah. It was minor.
I ran a red light. I was distracted.
140
00:07:51,740 --> 00:07:55,827
{\an8}I am fine. Can we make this quick?
I have a meeting with the board.
141
00:07:55,911 --> 00:07:58,955
{\an8}Hmm? OK. Let's see.
142
00:07:59,039 --> 00:08:00,123
{\an8}Ooh!
143
00:08:00,832 --> 00:08:03,460
{\an8}Ooh, I don't know, sir.
This lac looks pretty deep.
144
00:08:03,585 --> 00:08:09,049
{\an8}You'll definitely need stitches.
And the ankle... Oh, yikes.
145
00:08:09,758 --> 00:08:13,095
{\an8}- Yeah. You could need surgery.
- It's a sprain, Torres. [groans]
146
00:08:13,178 --> 00:08:15,263
{\an8}- You two know each other?
- Yeah.
147
00:08:15,972 --> 00:08:19,226
{\an8}Dr. Webber and I go way back. Huh?
We worked together for...
148
00:08:19,309 --> 00:08:21,269
{\an8}What was it? Five, six years? Yeah.
149
00:08:21,353 --> 00:08:23,939
{\an8}You know, I hate to say it, but you're
gonna have that lac repaired.
150
00:08:24,022 --> 00:08:27,192
{\an8}And this being a teaching hospital,
not to mention Dr. McKee's first day,
151
00:08:27,859 --> 00:08:30,070
{\an8}I have to let him work you up, so...
152
00:08:30,153 --> 00:08:31,780
{\an8}You know how to do sutures,
right, Dr. McKee?
153
00:08:33,031 --> 00:08:34,825
{\an8}- Damn straight.
- Great.
154
00:08:35,325 --> 00:08:36,660
{\an8}Good seeing you, Chief.
155
00:08:36,868 --> 00:08:38,120
{\an8}[stammers]
156
00:08:38,203 --> 00:08:41,581
{\an8}She's... She's just kidding
about this being my first day.
157
00:08:41,873 --> 00:08:42,916
{\an8}It's... It's my eighth.
158
00:08:44,584 --> 00:08:46,002
{\an8}What kind of sutures are you using?
159
00:08:46,336 --> 00:08:48,130
{\an8}- Uh... 3-0 nylon.
- No, no, no.
160
00:08:48,213 --> 00:08:50,507
{\an8}Use DERMABOND.
Takes less time and heals quicker.
161
00:08:50,590 --> 00:08:53,051
{\an8}Yeah, I know, but, like,
budget cuts, you know?
162
00:08:56,388 --> 00:09:00,142
{\an8}You like working
in this place, Dr., um... McKee?
163
00:09:00,767 --> 00:09:03,019
{\an8}- You think it's a strong program?
- It rocks.
164
00:09:03,186 --> 00:09:06,648
{\an8}Like, day eight and I'm doing
unsupervised procedures. Not too shabby.
165
00:09:07,315 --> 00:09:10,610
{\an8}Hmm... Not too shabby.
166
00:09:16,241 --> 00:09:18,660
{\an8}[footsteps approaching]
167
00:09:23,498 --> 00:09:25,917
{\an8}He trained at Northwestern
and then at Harvard.
168
00:09:26,293 --> 00:09:30,130
{\an8}He grew up five miles away from here.
Um... Not rich, not poor.
169
00:09:30,297 --> 00:09:33,675
{\an8}Comfortable and well loved
by his parents, but, um...
170
00:09:33,758 --> 00:09:36,261
{\an8}itching to do something
more with his life.
171
00:09:36,344 --> 00:09:38,346
{\an8}Which is when he enlisted at the age of...
172
00:09:38,430 --> 00:09:40,682
{\an8}Cristina, this is not a book report.
173
00:09:42,934 --> 00:09:46,188
{\an8}I am trying to explain to Dr. Wyatt
that I know things about you.
174
00:09:46,271 --> 00:09:47,147
{\an8}Cristina...
175
00:09:47,230 --> 00:09:48,732
{\an8}Wait!, wait!
He knows things about me, too,
176
00:09:48,815 --> 00:09:51,067
{\an8}if that's what you were gonna say.
'Cause we talk and we talk all the time.
177
00:09:52,986 --> 00:09:54,279
{\an8}Honey?
178
00:09:55,280 --> 00:09:58,700
{\an8}- [scoffs] "Honey?"
- [Dr. Wyatt] Cristina, let me be clear.
179
00:09:58,909 --> 00:10:01,703
{\an8}It's not just that I want the two of you
to get to know each other.
180
00:10:01,786 --> 00:10:04,497
{\an8}It's that I want Owen
to feel comfortable with you.
181
00:10:04,581 --> 00:10:05,957
{\an8}Oh, he is comfortable with me.
182
00:10:11,129 --> 00:10:14,841
{\an8}It's fine. You can talk to her. It's fine.
183
00:10:16,051 --> 00:10:18,637
{\an8}OK, Cristina, um...
184
00:10:18,929 --> 00:10:21,223
{\an8}He talks to you.
He's comfortable with you.
185
00:10:21,306 --> 00:10:22,557
{\an8}Does he talk to you about his trauma?
186
00:10:26,603 --> 00:10:28,188
{\an8}Does Owen talk to you about the war?
187
00:10:30,106 --> 00:10:32,901
{\an8}Does he talk to you about the incident
between you two?
188
00:10:33,860 --> 00:10:34,861
{\an8}The choking?
189
00:10:37,739 --> 00:10:41,493
{\an8}[Dr. Wyatt]
Owen's post-traumatic stress is fed
190
00:10:41,952 --> 00:10:45,080
{\an8}by his avoidance of talking
about anything in the war.
191
00:10:45,538 --> 00:10:47,832
{\an8}In order to improve, to heal,
192
00:10:47,916 --> 00:10:50,961
{\an8}he's going to have to start
talking about it.
193
00:10:51,461 --> 00:10:52,712
{\an8}To you, and to me.
194
00:10:54,422 --> 00:10:59,636
{\an8}And my concern is if you get lost
in the lust of it all,
195
00:10:59,928 --> 00:11:01,513
{\an8}he won't have to make a start.
196
00:11:02,097 --> 00:11:03,807
{\an8}He won't have any reason to.
197
00:11:05,225 --> 00:11:08,395
{\an8}He'll feel that he has everything
he needs, until he doesn't.
198
00:11:10,480 --> 00:11:15,235
{\an8}So I'm asking you... to wait.
199
00:11:23,201 --> 00:11:26,329
{\an8}- Finished.
- [gasping] Read it back to me.
200
00:11:27,455 --> 00:11:31,209
{\an8}"Hi, Mom. Please prepare yourself because
this is gonna be difficult to read.
201
00:11:31,292 --> 00:11:32,836
- I've been in an accident."
- That's not what I said.
202
00:11:32,919 --> 00:11:35,505
"I've suffered terrible injuries
and seventeen surgeries..."
203
00:11:35,588 --> 00:11:36,715
You can't send that.
204
00:11:36,798 --> 00:11:40,051
"I'm suffering from an abdominal infection
which I've refused to treat,
205
00:11:40,135 --> 00:11:43,430
so I'm gonna die soon.
Please come quickly, Mom,
206
00:11:43,513 --> 00:11:44,597
and if I'm gone before you get here,
207
00:11:44,681 --> 00:11:46,474
I just wanted to tell you how much
I love you."
208
00:11:46,558 --> 00:11:48,768
- Stop it.
- "Thank you for making me
209
00:11:48,852 --> 00:11:51,646
- from scratch."
- You bitch! You're a bitch!
210
00:11:52,188 --> 00:11:55,567
I can hit the call button and have the
nurses in here to take you into surgery.
211
00:11:55,650 --> 00:11:58,236
- Or I can hit send. That's the deal.
- I will sue you.
212
00:11:58,319 --> 00:12:02,323
- I will sue you and this hospital.
- No, you won't. You'll be dead.
213
00:12:04,784 --> 00:12:05,952
Please.
214
00:12:06,995 --> 00:12:09,998
- Please.
- [call button dinging]
215
00:12:11,583 --> 00:12:13,543
Hello, the nurses said you called for me?
216
00:12:13,626 --> 00:12:14,461
This is Andy.
217
00:12:15,795 --> 00:12:17,213
Andy Michaelson.
218
00:12:17,589 --> 00:12:21,718
- I'm sorry, have I treated you before?
- Dr. Arizona Robbins referred us.
219
00:12:21,885 --> 00:12:24,471
Oh! Oh, Andy!
220
00:12:24,554 --> 00:12:27,932
- You're the kid with the...
- With the thing no one can diagnose?
221
00:12:28,016 --> 00:12:31,853
- Yeah, that's us.
- OK, so Dr. Robbins sent you here
222
00:12:31,936 --> 00:12:35,148
- to Mercy West because?
- These are copies of Andy's paperwork
223
00:12:35,231 --> 00:12:36,524
from Seattle Grace.
224
00:12:38,485 --> 00:12:39,778
We don't sleep anymore.
225
00:12:40,612 --> 00:12:42,238
We basically just go to the hospital.
226
00:12:42,322 --> 00:12:44,699
You know, and I don't know
what else to do.
227
00:12:44,824 --> 00:12:46,618
- 'Cause I feel like a terrible mother.
- Mom.
228
00:12:46,701 --> 00:12:48,828
I feel like a terrible mother
because I'm supposed to...
229
00:12:50,914 --> 00:12:53,500
I'm supposed to do something.
And I can't, you know?
230
00:12:53,583 --> 00:12:56,920
I didn't go to medical school.
I majored in freaking history.
231
00:12:57,253 --> 00:13:00,673
You're the doctors, you know?
You're the doctors.
232
00:13:00,757 --> 00:13:03,802
And, basically, all we've been
doing up to this point, any of us,
233
00:13:03,968 --> 00:13:06,763
all we've been doing is getting my kid
strung out on pain meds.
234
00:13:06,846 --> 00:13:08,681
- Mom, stop.
- I can't, Andy!
235
00:13:09,349 --> 00:13:10,558
I can't stop.
236
00:13:11,976 --> 00:13:13,561
We don't sleep.
237
00:13:14,646 --> 00:13:16,439
He can't sleep.
238
00:13:17,148 --> 00:13:18,942
We can't sleep.
239
00:13:20,068 --> 00:13:21,569
And I'm scared.
240
00:13:21,736 --> 00:13:24,697
And Dr. Robbins said that
what she needs for you to give us
241
00:13:24,781 --> 00:13:27,826
is a 3D MRI of his spine.
242
00:13:27,909 --> 00:13:32,122
And she said you wouldn't want to 'cause
there's no indication or whatever,
243
00:13:32,205 --> 00:13:33,832
but she says that's what he needs.
244
00:13:35,667 --> 00:13:36,751
Please.
245
00:13:38,086 --> 00:13:41,506
I can't be this useless.
And you know what? Neither can you.
246
00:13:43,508 --> 00:13:44,551
Please.
247
00:13:46,010 --> 00:13:47,762
[emotional music playing]
248
00:13:47,846 --> 00:13:49,681
[Cristina] That's a lot
of necrotic small bowel.
249
00:13:50,265 --> 00:13:53,601
- [Lexie] Can you save any of it?
- [Bailey] Yesterday, I could have.
250
00:13:53,685 --> 00:13:56,813
Yesterday, this would've
been a simple drainage.
251
00:13:56,896 --> 00:14:00,525
But that was before Dr. Yang
threatened my patient
252
00:14:00,608 --> 00:14:03,903
with a colostomy that, thankfully,
will not be necessary
253
00:14:03,987 --> 00:14:06,781
because it did not
actually involve the colon.
254
00:14:10,201 --> 00:14:12,328
- How can I help?
- Oh, you've done enough.
255
00:14:20,170 --> 00:14:23,423
She asked me a question.
I was right to answer it. I did my job!
256
00:14:24,007 --> 00:14:27,218
A patient asked me to disclose the risks
of a surgical procedure,
257
00:14:27,302 --> 00:14:30,597
and I am required by law
and my oath to do so.
258
00:14:31,055 --> 00:14:34,601
If you know a way to sugar-coat
a colostomy bag, I'd like to hear it.
259
00:14:36,311 --> 00:14:40,190
If you know a more respectful way
to speak to an attending surgeon,
260
00:14:40,273 --> 00:14:44,360
I'd like to hear that!
Until you do, you don't talk to me.
261
00:14:44,444 --> 00:14:45,862
You're off my service.
262
00:14:47,906 --> 00:14:50,575
OK, OK, seriously? What is your problem?
263
00:14:50,783 --> 00:14:52,785
[dramatic music playing]
264
00:15:04,025 --> 00:15:07,028
[Mark] More suits?
It's freaking people out.
265
00:15:07,112 --> 00:15:11,158
Talk of downsizing, corporate takeover,
rumors that Webber's jumping ship.
266
00:15:12,325 --> 00:15:14,661
You've got the chief's ear.
What's he got planned?
267
00:15:15,662 --> 00:15:17,539
- [man] Here's the test.
- [woman] Thank you.
268
00:15:18,582 --> 00:15:22,335
[sighs] He's retiring.
They're making me chief.
269
00:15:22,419 --> 00:15:24,087
- No!
- Yeah.
270
00:15:24,504 --> 00:15:25,839
- Really?
- Yeah.
271
00:15:26,798 --> 00:15:29,342
- Really? Wow.
- Yep. Mm-hmm.
272
00:15:29,426 --> 00:15:31,720
I mean, the Chief
never said anything to me.
273
00:15:31,803 --> 00:15:33,054
I would've fought you hard for that.
274
00:15:34,556 --> 00:15:36,766
But hell, I guess if that's what he wants,
I guess...
275
00:15:37,225 --> 00:15:38,894
congratulations are in order.
276
00:15:39,853 --> 00:15:41,146
[laughing]
277
00:15:42,981 --> 00:15:44,649
Wait. That was...
278
00:15:44,733 --> 00:15:46,860
- You're messing with me?
- It's just too easy.
279
00:15:46,943 --> 00:15:49,446
Oh, you got a mean streak,
you know that?
280
00:15:49,529 --> 00:15:50,780
- Yeah.
- Mean!
281
00:15:52,490 --> 00:15:57,370
- [sighs] Seriously, what's going on?
- I have no idea.
282
00:16:00,373 --> 00:16:01,416
[sighs heavily]
283
00:16:02,834 --> 00:16:04,586
[keys jangling]
284
00:16:05,212 --> 00:16:09,341
Oh... I have wine. White and red.
285
00:16:09,424 --> 00:16:12,552
And I have cigarettes.
Which is awful, I know.
286
00:16:12,636 --> 00:16:15,847
But I only smoke them very occasionally
when I know I'm gonna be in trouble.
287
00:16:15,931 --> 00:16:18,475
- Like now.
- It was inappropriate.
288
00:16:18,642 --> 00:16:20,810
Not to mention manipulative and stupid.
289
00:16:21,478 --> 00:16:23,355
- You smoke?
- I know. OK, listen, I know.
290
00:16:23,438 --> 00:16:25,774
You have every right to be mad at me,
but I ran out of options. So...
291
00:16:25,857 --> 00:16:28,151
[Callie] It's an expensive test!
There was no indication to do it!
292
00:16:28,235 --> 00:16:29,861
There's a reason Webber turned you down!
293
00:16:31,571 --> 00:16:34,741
- So you didn't do it.
- Of course I did it, Arizona.
294
00:16:35,492 --> 00:16:38,119
- [Arizona] Thank you.
- No. Don't thank me yet.
295
00:16:38,578 --> 00:16:41,331
- The scan didn't show anything.
- What? Come on. Nothing?
296
00:16:41,414 --> 00:16:42,540
No.
297
00:16:44,125 --> 00:16:45,877
OK, now that-that
looks a little funny to me.
298
00:16:45,961 --> 00:16:48,129
I thought so too,
but the radiologist said it's normal.
299
00:16:50,340 --> 00:16:52,342
OK, all right. Just... Here.
300
00:16:52,509 --> 00:16:53,593
[sighs]
301
00:16:53,718 --> 00:16:55,929
Was there anything peculiar about his H&P?
302
00:16:56,012 --> 00:16:58,181
["Hologram" playing]
303
00:16:58,265 --> 00:17:00,976
♪ I'm gonna let you down,
Gonna toss you around ♪
304
00:17:01,059 --> 00:17:04,396
♪ Gonna make you want
Everything you haven't found ♪
305
00:17:05,438 --> 00:17:06,898
[laughter]
306
00:17:06,982 --> 00:17:08,275
- [Derek] Oh!
- [glass breaking]
307
00:17:08,358 --> 00:17:09,985
Sorry! Sorry!
308
00:17:11,319 --> 00:17:14,239
- [Derek] Sorry! Sorry, we're sorry.
- [Meredith] Sorry!
309
00:17:14,322 --> 00:17:16,533
We'll be sure to clean the countertop.
310
00:17:16,700 --> 00:17:21,997
Oh, you didn't used to do this before.
And now it's kind of all the time.
311
00:17:22,414 --> 00:17:24,874
- Everywhere. And...
- Yes, you know, it's...
312
00:17:25,583 --> 00:17:26,751
We're married now.
313
00:17:27,669 --> 00:17:30,338
Things have changed a little.
But sorry about the countertop.
314
00:17:30,463 --> 00:17:31,631
[laughs hesitantly]
315
00:17:31,756 --> 00:17:35,593
Um... So you guys are... You really...
That's it? The Post-it? That's for real?
316
00:17:35,677 --> 00:17:37,721
Yeah. That's for real.
317
00:17:38,138 --> 00:17:39,306
[gasping]
318
00:17:39,431 --> 00:17:40,932
- [laughter]
- [gagging]
319
00:17:50,859 --> 00:17:51,860
What are you reading?
320
00:17:52,235 --> 00:17:54,195
[Alex] I got this patient
I'm trying to diagnose.
321
00:17:54,279 --> 00:17:56,948
- It's driving me nuts.
- So take a break. I miss you.
322
00:17:57,449 --> 00:18:00,827
- Well... I'm right here.
- [Izzie] No, you're not.
323
00:18:01,995 --> 00:18:04,372
You're here,
but you're not here, and I miss you.
324
00:18:04,539 --> 00:18:06,124
Iz, come on, I'm trying to work.
325
00:18:12,172 --> 00:18:14,049
I'm wishing for a brain tumor.
326
00:18:15,508 --> 00:18:17,344
I'm wishing, all the time,
for a giant tumor
327
00:18:17,427 --> 00:18:19,054
that would press down on my brain
328
00:18:19,137 --> 00:18:20,722
and make me hallucinate George.
329
00:18:22,682 --> 00:18:24,351
So that I could talk to him again.
330
00:18:25,310 --> 00:18:27,312
So I could laugh with him again. I...
331
00:18:30,565 --> 00:18:31,524
I miss him.
332
00:18:32,650 --> 00:18:34,986
So much. I miss him all the time.
333
00:18:35,070 --> 00:18:37,989
And I just want to feel better,
even for a minute.
334
00:18:38,073 --> 00:18:41,326
You know, I just want to be a person
who isn't wishing for a brain tumor.
335
00:18:41,409 --> 00:18:42,660
Just for one minute.
336
00:18:44,204 --> 00:18:46,998
And I can't drink
because of the cancer meds,
337
00:18:47,082 --> 00:18:50,668
I don't do drugs, I can't even work
right now. I don't have any distractions.
338
00:18:52,545 --> 00:18:53,630
I'm sad.
339
00:18:54,756 --> 00:18:56,508
And I miss George. So please...
340
00:18:58,176 --> 00:19:01,471
Please, come inside
and help me feel better.
341
00:19:06,101 --> 00:19:07,352
"I miss George."
342
00:19:08,186 --> 00:19:11,272
Nice. Real seductive.
343
00:19:11,648 --> 00:19:14,025
[emotional music playing]
344
00:19:41,314 --> 00:19:42,357
[knock on door]
345
00:19:43,900 --> 00:19:45,360
Oh. Hey. Is Mark around?
346
00:19:45,860 --> 00:19:47,696
- He's in the shower.
- Oh, thanks.
347
00:19:49,656 --> 00:19:53,576
Hey, have you heard anything
about what's happening with the Chief?
348
00:19:53,660 --> 00:19:56,746
There's all these rumors
floating around Mercy West,
349
00:19:56,830 --> 00:19:59,749
like he might be coming to work for us.
That would not go well for me.
350
00:19:59,833 --> 00:20:02,085
I haven't heard anything.
I'll check with Derek again.
351
00:20:02,168 --> 00:20:03,753
- Thanks.
- Can you hand me the shampoo?
352
00:20:05,046 --> 00:20:06,298
- Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.
353
00:20:12,137 --> 00:20:13,471
Are you really gay?
354
00:20:14,389 --> 00:20:18,643
Like, how gay are you
on a scale of one to...
355
00:20:19,519 --> 00:20:22,230
gay? 'Cause that's my boyfriend.
356
00:20:22,522 --> 00:20:25,483
In... In the shower.
My hot, hot, naked boyfriend.
357
00:20:25,567 --> 00:20:28,194
And I... How gay are you?
358
00:20:28,737 --> 00:20:31,031
I'm sorry. It's...
359
00:20:31,197 --> 00:20:32,365
I've known Mark a while and...
360
00:20:32,741 --> 00:20:35,410
But I'll... try not to do that again.
361
00:20:35,493 --> 00:20:37,746
The naked in the shower thing.
362
00:20:37,871 --> 00:20:40,457
Or the you half-naked
in the hallway thing.
363
00:20:40,540 --> 00:20:43,209
'Cause... 'cause even if you really
are gay, he's not.
364
00:20:43,293 --> 00:20:45,086
And... and you're hot.
365
00:20:51,384 --> 00:20:53,928
He doesn't look at my boobs anymore.
366
00:20:54,220 --> 00:20:58,141
The first thing he used to look at
when I walked in anywhere...
367
00:20:58,892 --> 00:21:00,143
was my boobs.
368
00:21:01,144 --> 00:21:03,813
He doesn't look anymore.
Not since he met you.
369
00:21:05,315 --> 00:21:07,942
- OK?
- OK.
370
00:21:13,907 --> 00:21:17,410
- [Richard] Shepherd?
- You're a hard man to track down.
371
00:21:17,744 --> 00:21:20,330
- I'm busy, as you know.
- Scoping out Mercy West?
372
00:21:20,955 --> 00:21:24,209
[Derek] You planning on jumping ship?
Because I assume, as a friend,
373
00:21:24,751 --> 00:21:26,795
you would tell me
if there's anything I need to know.
374
00:21:27,253 --> 00:21:29,422
- Those are rumors, Derek.
- There are a lot of rumors.
375
00:21:30,465 --> 00:21:33,968
- And Jennings isn't answering my calls.
- Why are you calling Jennings, Derek?
376
00:21:34,052 --> 00:21:36,221
I told you I would fill you in when
there was something to tell.
377
00:21:36,679 --> 00:21:38,848
You feel the need to go
behind my back, at least do me...
378
00:21:38,932 --> 00:21:41,851
Behind your back? Behind your back?
379
00:21:42,352 --> 00:21:43,728
I'm the one who's got your back.
380
00:21:45,021 --> 00:21:46,147
Don't you forget that.
381
00:21:47,482 --> 00:21:49,025
[door opens, closes]
382
00:21:49,150 --> 00:21:51,694
- Dr. Shepherd, do you have a minute?
- Yes. For what?
383
00:21:51,778 --> 00:21:53,029
A kid with a tethered spinal cord.
384
00:21:53,113 --> 00:21:55,365
I sat up in the middle of the night
and I thought tethered spinal cord.
385
00:21:55,448 --> 00:21:57,158
But you're not gonna see it on there.
386
00:21:57,242 --> 00:21:59,119
I need to run another test
to confirm the diagnosis.
387
00:21:59,202 --> 00:22:01,371
A tethered cord's pretty rare.
Does he have a history of spina bifida?
388
00:22:01,454 --> 00:22:03,832
- No.
- Lower back lesions? Hyperreflexia?
389
00:22:03,915 --> 00:22:07,293
No and no. But the pain is aggravated
when he extends or flexes his spine.
390
00:22:07,377 --> 00:22:08,920
I know what you're gonna say.
391
00:22:09,003 --> 00:22:11,089
A tethered cord should've showed up
on the MRI.
392
00:22:11,172 --> 00:22:14,050
But what if it didn't? What if
what this kid needs is not an MRI,
393
00:22:14,134 --> 00:22:17,887
- but a more specific CT myelogram.
- Maybe.
394
00:22:17,971 --> 00:22:19,973
- Order one.
- I can't.
395
00:22:20,056 --> 00:22:22,725
Because if I did, I'd get fired
and I really like my job.
396
00:22:24,018 --> 00:22:26,729
- Did the Chief deny that request?
- Several times.
397
00:22:27,397 --> 00:22:29,441
You should've led with the part
about the Chief.
398
00:22:30,024 --> 00:22:31,317
Come on.
399
00:22:31,401 --> 00:22:33,236
- [Lexie] You're doing great.
- [man] You're up, girl.
400
00:22:33,319 --> 00:22:35,655
I know, who'd have thought
standing could be so hard, right?
401
00:22:35,738 --> 00:22:36,698
You're doing awesome.
402
00:22:36,781 --> 00:22:37,949
- Awesome.
- Put me down.
403
00:22:38,032 --> 00:22:40,160
- Let's go a couple more seconds...
- Put me down.
404
00:22:41,244 --> 00:22:44,372
- That was great.
- Take a sec and go again for me, OK?
405
00:22:44,455 --> 00:22:46,624
- No.
- I know, Clara.
406
00:22:46,708 --> 00:22:48,459
This is where the hard part begins.
407
00:22:49,210 --> 00:22:51,671
[serious music playing]
408
00:22:57,552 --> 00:22:59,137
[Arizona] Hmm.
409
00:23:02,307 --> 00:23:03,433
McDreamy.
410
00:23:04,559 --> 00:23:07,103
- I'm sorry?
- I get it now.
411
00:23:07,604 --> 00:23:10,356
The whole, you know, the McDreamy thing.
I didn't... I didn't get it before,
412
00:23:10,440 --> 00:23:12,525
but now... I get it.
413
00:23:13,902 --> 00:23:15,987
You know they call you that, right?
414
00:23:16,070 --> 00:23:17,071
Yes.
415
00:23:19,073 --> 00:23:22,202
I'm involved, by the way, in case
you thought I was coming onto you,
416
00:23:22,285 --> 00:23:25,788
because I was not.
Plus, I heard that you got married.
417
00:23:25,872 --> 00:23:28,041
- So congratulations.
- Yes, thank you.
418
00:23:28,124 --> 00:23:29,250
[all laugh]
419
00:23:29,334 --> 00:23:32,712
You wrote some hokey crap on a
Post-it note in the resident's lounge.
420
00:23:32,795 --> 00:23:35,548
Sorry, but until you're sweating it out
in a morning coat
421
00:23:35,632 --> 00:23:39,010
with a ball of white taffeta coming
at you, you're not really married.
422
00:23:39,093 --> 00:23:43,514
OK. Well, I've consummated mine.
I consummate mine all the time.
423
00:23:44,015 --> 00:23:46,601
How's that going for you, Karev?
Girls talk.
424
00:23:46,684 --> 00:23:49,354
You might wanna consider that
next time you judge my Post-it.
425
00:23:52,482 --> 00:23:53,650
[Meredith sighs]
426
00:23:57,028 --> 00:23:58,279
I haven't cried yet.
427
00:24:00,698 --> 00:24:02,742
I'm using work and sex as a distraction.
428
00:24:02,825 --> 00:24:04,786
And I think it's working for me.
429
00:24:06,621 --> 00:24:08,957
Have you seen the girl, Amanda,
430
00:24:09,540 --> 00:24:13,670
sitting outside the hospital
on that bench all day long?
431
00:24:13,753 --> 00:24:18,091
I miss sex. I miss it so much.
432
00:24:22,762 --> 00:24:23,763
What?
433
00:24:25,098 --> 00:24:26,015
Mer!
434
00:24:26,933 --> 00:24:29,560
[Lexie] I'm worried about Clara.
She's depressed.
435
00:24:29,686 --> 00:24:31,854
Like, a whole new level of depressed.
436
00:24:31,938 --> 00:24:34,482
- I don't know what to do.
- You talking about Ceviche?
437
00:24:34,607 --> 00:24:35,483
That...
438
00:24:37,485 --> 00:24:40,571
Oh, my God! That's... That is so rude!
439
00:24:40,655 --> 00:24:43,866
Ceviche? That is so... That's rude.
440
00:24:43,950 --> 00:24:45,743
That... That is so rude!
441
00:24:49,956 --> 00:24:51,416
Anyone else I can offend?
442
00:24:52,667 --> 00:24:54,585
A tethered spinal cord?
443
00:24:55,003 --> 00:24:57,839
Mm-hmm, one of the threads in his
spinal cord is attached to his tailbone.
444
00:24:57,922 --> 00:25:00,049
Normally, the spinal cord
is free at the end,
445
00:25:00,133 --> 00:25:03,052
but with it attached,
when you grew, it started pulling.
446
00:25:03,136 --> 00:25:06,639
- Thus, the excruciating pain.
- So can we fix it? Is it fixable?
447
00:25:06,723 --> 00:25:10,059
- It's a microsurgery.
- I'll snip the tethered cord,
448
00:25:10,143 --> 00:25:11,936
and he'll be free of pain.
449
00:25:13,021 --> 00:25:14,814
[emotional music playing]
450
00:25:14,897 --> 00:25:19,485
She's not normally like this. Before
all this, she was like a normal mom.
451
00:25:19,694 --> 00:25:23,406
- Oh!
- Andy, this is a normal mom.
452
00:25:30,621 --> 00:25:32,790
Are we waiting for Dr. Swender?
453
00:25:32,915 --> 00:25:36,002
No. Dr. Swender has handed you off to me.
454
00:25:37,378 --> 00:25:40,006
[scoffs] What are you, like, second year?
455
00:25:42,884 --> 00:25:45,845
- Third.
- That's, um...
456
00:25:46,471 --> 00:25:50,183
- Can we page Dr. Swender or something?
- Stevens, this is a good thing.
457
00:25:50,892 --> 00:25:53,519
It is. You still have cancer.
458
00:25:54,270 --> 00:25:57,357
But not enough to interest
Dr. Swender anymore.
459
00:25:58,107 --> 00:26:03,237
- It is a good thing.
- You're saying I have JV cancer.
460
00:26:03,446 --> 00:26:07,533
[man] I'm saying your mets have shrunk
way down, and there are no new ones.
461
00:26:07,617 --> 00:26:09,577
Your protocol is working very effectively.
462
00:26:12,121 --> 00:26:15,666
[Bailey] Stevens, this is about
as good as the news gets.
463
00:26:17,377 --> 00:26:20,088
Um... So, what now?
464
00:26:20,171 --> 00:26:21,339
We're gonna use the port in your chest
465
00:26:21,422 --> 00:26:24,384
to continue with your IL-2 regimen
for now.
466
00:26:24,467 --> 00:26:27,512
And we'll continue monitoring
the progression of your disease
467
00:26:27,595 --> 00:26:31,015
with PET scans every three to six months.
468
00:26:31,307 --> 00:26:34,310
Is there some kind
of timeline on this, or?
469
00:26:34,394 --> 00:26:38,314
[man] Your wife is living
with cancer, Dr. Karev.
470
00:26:38,398 --> 00:26:40,108
Right now, the cancer has stopped growing.
471
00:26:40,191 --> 00:26:44,278
With a cancer this aggressive,
that's pretty stunning success.
472
00:26:45,238 --> 00:26:49,242
There's no timeline.
There's just... We watch it.
473
00:26:49,826 --> 00:26:53,871
We wait.
We hope it doesn't start to grow again.
474
00:26:58,167 --> 00:27:01,754
- That's it?
- That's it.
475
00:27:17,205 --> 00:27:19,875
[Alex] I see contractions
in the anterior tibialis.
476
00:27:19,958 --> 00:27:22,669
[Derek] OK. That's the nerve root,
not the filum.
477
00:27:23,378 --> 00:27:25,922
[Derek] Bipolars
and the micro scissors, please.
478
00:27:30,093 --> 00:27:33,263
- Wanna make the cut?
- No. I don't need to.
479
00:27:33,346 --> 00:27:37,100
You know, without you, this kid probably
would've been a chronic pain patient,
480
00:27:37,183 --> 00:27:41,438
and possibly addicted to pain meds.
He owes his entire future to you.
481
00:27:42,814 --> 00:27:43,940
You should make the cut.
482
00:27:44,024 --> 00:27:46,359
["Gravity" playing]
483
00:27:47,068 --> 00:27:47,903
OK?
484
00:27:52,365 --> 00:27:53,199
OK.
485
00:27:54,576 --> 00:27:55,702
Put the scissor in...
486
00:28:01,625 --> 00:28:02,709
There. Nicely done.
487
00:28:06,171 --> 00:28:09,674
[Owen] Clara, Dr. Grey says you're
still refusing your physical therapy.
488
00:28:11,134 --> 00:28:12,719
Now, I understand it's hard.
489
00:28:12,844 --> 00:28:14,554
But you have to work these muscles now
490
00:28:14,638 --> 00:28:17,849
or they will atrophy
and they will heal incorrectly.
491
00:28:19,225 --> 00:28:23,730
Clara, you gotta do the work.
You know, you just got to do the work now.
492
00:28:30,403 --> 00:28:33,823
Clara, I know what it is to
not want to live, to wish that you'd died,
493
00:28:33,907 --> 00:28:39,037
to lose everything,
to not want to call your mother.
494
00:28:39,371 --> 00:28:41,873
Believe it or not,
I know exactly what that is.
495
00:28:42,457 --> 00:28:44,250
I have been there.
496
00:28:44,876 --> 00:28:46,503
I am back now.
497
00:28:48,964 --> 00:28:52,259
As impossible as it felt, eventually,
498
00:28:53,176 --> 00:28:54,219
I came back.
499
00:28:54,678 --> 00:28:58,306
And so can you.
You have got to do the work.
500
00:29:09,234 --> 00:29:12,153
- You have to get her admitted to Psych.
- Committed?
501
00:29:12,237 --> 00:29:14,614
- You want me to have her committed?
- Nothing more we can do.
502
00:29:14,739 --> 00:29:18,285
- You have to make that call.
- People are calling you "Ceviche".
503
00:29:18,368 --> 00:29:20,453
- [Owen] Dr. Grey...
- That's... You know,
504
00:29:20,537 --> 00:29:23,748
you can't go out like that, Clara,
with people calling you Ceviche.
505
00:29:24,582 --> 00:29:27,127
- Ceviche?
- Yeah. It's a meal.
506
00:29:27,544 --> 00:29:29,879
It's Peruvian, I think.
507
00:29:31,131 --> 00:29:32,882
It's chopped up fish.
508
00:29:44,477 --> 00:29:46,813
That's really horrible, isn't it?
509
00:29:47,689 --> 00:29:48,940
It is. It's...
510
00:29:50,650 --> 00:29:52,360
It's horrible.
511
00:29:57,824 --> 00:29:58,992
[Clara] It's horrible!
512
00:30:06,916 --> 00:30:08,168
[Izzie] I didn't expect this.
513
00:30:08,793 --> 00:30:11,880
They say cancer, they say stage four,
you expect to die.
514
00:30:13,256 --> 00:30:17,093
And then you start thinking, "Maybe
I can kick it. Maybe I'll be the miracle."
515
00:30:18,595 --> 00:30:20,972
Well, you are the miracle.
516
00:30:21,056 --> 00:30:22,640
I'm still living with cancer.
517
00:30:23,641 --> 00:30:27,354
You know, I just... You don't expect that.
518
00:30:30,690 --> 00:30:32,442
[Izzie] Isn't that the girl
that George saved?
519
00:30:33,443 --> 00:30:34,819
Oh, Amanda.
520
00:30:35,320 --> 00:30:38,073
- Yeah.
- What is she doing here?
521
00:30:38,156 --> 00:30:39,657
Oh, she sits there.
522
00:30:40,533 --> 00:30:42,243
Every day, all day.
523
00:30:43,411 --> 00:30:46,122
- For God's sakes.
- Where... where... What?
524
00:30:49,626 --> 00:30:52,253
Get up. I mean it, get up.
525
00:30:53,046 --> 00:30:54,047
Get up!
526
00:30:55,215 --> 00:30:58,510
[sighs heavily] Now, go get a life.
527
00:31:01,638 --> 00:31:02,722
I can't.
528
00:31:05,683 --> 00:31:08,853
George was a surgeon, he had a purpose.
529
00:31:08,937 --> 00:31:11,981
He wanted to save lives
and now he doesn't get the chance.
530
00:31:13,942 --> 00:31:17,320
Now, he doesn't get the chance
to do anything anymore, but you do.
531
00:31:18,613 --> 00:31:20,907
You could go to medical school, you know?
532
00:31:20,990 --> 00:31:22,951
You could hang out
with your freaking friends.
533
00:31:23,034 --> 00:31:26,371
I don't care what you do.
Just go do something with your life.
534
00:31:26,454 --> 00:31:29,707
Because you have one, you lived!
535
00:31:29,791 --> 00:31:31,751
You lived and George didn't!
536
00:31:31,960 --> 00:31:33,211
And I know, I...
537
00:31:36,089 --> 00:31:40,176
I know that that feels horrible
538
00:31:40,260 --> 00:31:43,638
and shocking and terrifying.
539
00:31:45,723 --> 00:31:46,891
But you lived.
540
00:31:49,394 --> 00:31:52,021
So go live your freaking life.
541
00:31:55,525 --> 00:31:58,111
I... I don't know how.
542
00:31:58,736 --> 00:32:00,113
Nobody does.
543
00:32:00,822 --> 00:32:02,323
Nobody knows how.
544
00:32:04,367 --> 00:32:07,620
But, God, have enough respect
for George to figure it out.
545
00:32:08,371 --> 00:32:10,623
'Cause if I see you sitting
on this bench ever again,
546
00:32:10,707 --> 00:32:13,001
I will kick your ass from here to Sunday.
547
00:32:13,918 --> 00:32:16,254
[melancholic music playing]
548
00:32:38,162 --> 00:32:41,749
I can't get back on Bailey's service.
She's still not even looking at me.
549
00:32:41,832 --> 00:32:43,918
Give her time. You know,
she was close with O'Malley...
550
00:32:44,001 --> 00:32:47,505
It's not even about O'Malley. I mean,
she's mad at me about Ceviche.
551
00:32:47,588 --> 00:32:50,007
- [laughs] You got to stop that.
- Ceviche?
552
00:32:50,633 --> 00:32:53,302
- Oh, it's a patient.
- A boating accident victim.
553
00:32:53,385 --> 00:32:57,640
She thinks it's OK to call her a seafood
dish. I mean, is that... is that OK?
554
00:32:57,765 --> 00:33:01,435
- Well, it's... pretty dark.
- Oh, come on. I'm dark?
555
00:33:01,519 --> 00:33:03,854
I'm not the one going around
choking people in their sleep.
556
00:33:13,072 --> 00:33:14,073
Too soon?
557
00:33:21,247 --> 00:33:23,457
I'm not the guy going around
choking people in their sleep.
558
00:33:23,541 --> 00:33:25,709
- I know.
- It was a dream. I...
559
00:33:28,045 --> 00:33:29,964
I can't remember
what I was dreaming about, but...
560
00:33:31,882 --> 00:33:33,717
I was trying to save my own life.
561
00:33:37,054 --> 00:33:38,597
I wasn't trying to hurt you.
562
00:33:42,768 --> 00:33:43,769
I was...
563
00:33:45,354 --> 00:33:46,939
I was fighting for my life.
564
00:33:53,946 --> 00:33:54,864
OK.
565
00:33:59,118 --> 00:34:00,035
[Dr. Wyatt] You made a start.
566
00:34:04,957 --> 00:34:06,375
You made a start.
567
00:34:11,922 --> 00:34:15,259
- [Lexie] You have it, you have it.
- [man] You've got this.
568
00:34:19,471 --> 00:34:22,057
- Yeah, girl!
- I did it.
569
00:34:22,141 --> 00:34:24,226
- You did it.
- I did it.
570
00:34:28,063 --> 00:34:28,939
Lexie?
571
00:34:30,900 --> 00:34:32,109
Will you call my mum?
572
00:34:34,236 --> 00:34:36,614
Yeah. Yeah.
573
00:34:39,033 --> 00:34:40,993
OK, come on. Come on.
574
00:34:44,413 --> 00:34:46,582
[Lexie laughs] You got it!
575
00:34:47,541 --> 00:34:50,044
[Lexie] Grief may be a thingwe all have in common...
576
00:34:51,587 --> 00:34:53,464
but it looks different on everyone.
577
00:34:55,966 --> 00:34:57,509
[knock on door]
578
00:35:01,764 --> 00:35:02,640
Hey.
579
00:35:10,981 --> 00:35:13,275
[Mark] It isn't just deathwe have to grieve.
580
00:35:13,651 --> 00:35:14,860
It's life.
581
00:35:15,152 --> 00:35:16,403
It's loss.
582
00:35:17,238 --> 00:35:18,530
It's change.
583
00:35:21,033 --> 00:35:24,370
[Alex] And when we wonder whyit has to suck so much sometimes,
584
00:35:25,246 --> 00:35:29,333
has to hurt so bad,
the thing we gotta try to remember
585
00:35:29,416 --> 00:35:31,001
is that it can turn on a dime.
586
00:35:31,085 --> 00:35:32,878
[door opening]
587
00:35:37,258 --> 00:35:39,593
- What is this?
- Take off your pants.
588
00:35:41,011 --> 00:35:42,638
Iz, Iz...
589
00:35:43,847 --> 00:35:45,057
Be my husband.
590
00:35:46,767 --> 00:35:50,312
Get undressed, get into bed and hold me.
591
00:35:50,688 --> 00:35:53,023
I don't know what you're so mad about
and I don't know what you're scared of
592
00:35:53,107 --> 00:35:56,110
because you won't talk to me,
but I'm scared, too, Alex.
593
00:35:56,193 --> 00:35:58,570
And I... I can't... If you won't...
594
00:36:00,364 --> 00:36:02,950
If we're gonna have any chance
at a life together, I need you.
595
00:36:04,118 --> 00:36:04,952
Please.
596
00:36:07,371 --> 00:36:08,831
You died in my arms.
597
00:36:10,582 --> 00:36:13,210
You died in my arms! You freaking died,
598
00:36:13,294 --> 00:36:16,213
and then you left instructions that
I wasn't allowed to save your life!
599
00:36:17,589 --> 00:36:21,510
You want to know what I'm scared of?
I'm scared of everything!
600
00:36:21,593 --> 00:36:24,388
I'm scared to move! I'm scared to breathe!
601
00:36:24,471 --> 00:36:25,806
I'm scared to touch you!
602
00:36:27,766 --> 00:36:30,561
I can't lose you. I won't survive.
603
00:36:31,228 --> 00:36:32,855
And that's your fault.
604
00:36:33,063 --> 00:36:35,149
You made me love you,
you made me let you in,
605
00:36:35,232 --> 00:36:37,109
and then you freakin' die in my arms!
606
00:36:41,864 --> 00:36:43,490
[Izzie] That's how you stay alive.
607
00:36:50,205 --> 00:36:52,207
When it hurts so much you can't breathe,
608
00:36:52,750 --> 00:36:54,335
that's how you survive.
609
00:37:14,980 --> 00:37:15,939
Miranda.
610
00:37:21,695 --> 00:37:23,364
[Derek] By remembering that one day,
611
00:37:24,281 --> 00:37:28,994
somehow, impossibly,
you won't feel this way.
612
00:37:29,953 --> 00:37:31,497
It won't hurt this much.
613
00:37:32,873 --> 00:37:35,167
["Today Has Been OK" playing]
614
00:37:36,210 --> 00:37:37,753
[Bailey sighs]
615
00:37:41,799 --> 00:37:45,386
I... I am an attending
616
00:37:45,928 --> 00:37:49,223
and I am a single mother
617
00:37:49,890 --> 00:37:53,602
and I lost O'Malley and, um...
618
00:37:54,395 --> 00:37:58,649
I just can't. I can't care anymore.
619
00:38:00,734 --> 00:38:02,778
Stevens is not my child.
620
00:38:03,278 --> 00:38:05,531
O'Malley was not my child.
621
00:38:05,948 --> 00:38:07,908
I have to stop treating...
622
00:38:10,160 --> 00:38:12,746
I just have to stop caring so much.
623
00:38:15,207 --> 00:38:20,379
I can't keep...
feeling like this, not at work.
624
00:38:21,463 --> 00:38:26,677
I have to save the feeling for my son,
who needs it!
625
00:38:29,221 --> 00:38:32,099
I just can't keep giving it away here.
626
00:38:33,559 --> 00:38:34,560
I can't.
627
00:38:36,603 --> 00:38:37,813
[sighs]
628
00:38:39,022 --> 00:38:40,023
I won't.
629
00:38:42,025 --> 00:38:44,111
♪ He was known by all in town ♪
630
00:38:47,281 --> 00:38:51,118
[Bailey] Grief comesin its own time for everyone.
631
00:38:53,120 --> 00:38:54,746
In its own way.
632
00:38:58,167 --> 00:38:59,668
[Owen] So the best we can do,
633
00:39:00,461 --> 00:39:01,962
the best anyone can do...
634
00:39:04,089 --> 00:39:05,966
is try for honesty.
635
00:39:07,134 --> 00:39:08,594
I don't want to hurt you again.
636
00:39:10,471 --> 00:39:12,181
My problems, they're real.
637
00:39:12,264 --> 00:39:17,311
And this... this makes us real.
It makes my problems your problems.
638
00:39:18,604 --> 00:39:19,605
I'm afraid.
639
00:39:20,689 --> 00:39:22,107
I don't want to hurt you again.
640
00:39:27,029 --> 00:39:28,447
You can sleep in the bathtub.
641
00:39:29,031 --> 00:39:30,282
Wha... [laughs]
642
00:39:37,831 --> 00:39:41,210
♪ Feeding on the prayer ♪
643
00:39:41,502 --> 00:39:44,838
[Meredith] The really crappy thing,the very worst part of grief,
644
00:39:45,255 --> 00:39:46,882
is that you can't control it.
645
00:39:48,091 --> 00:39:51,303
♪ But love had lost its course ♪
646
00:39:52,262 --> 00:39:54,681
- What are you doing?
- We need the space.
647
00:39:58,352 --> 00:40:01,313
♪ Today has been OK ♪
648
00:40:01,897 --> 00:40:06,360
[Arizona] The best we can do is tryto let ourselves feel it when it comes.
649
00:40:07,152 --> 00:40:09,863
Hey. Ugh... Thank you.
650
00:40:09,947 --> 00:40:11,907
I got stuck with this intern today,
651
00:40:11,990 --> 00:40:14,201
took him four tries
to throw in a central line.
652
00:40:15,244 --> 00:40:17,120
Reminded me a little bit
of George, actually,
653
00:40:18,205 --> 00:40:19,206
when he was an intern.
654
00:40:21,166 --> 00:40:22,793
[Callie] And let it go when we can.
655
00:40:27,047 --> 00:40:30,133
♪ The lovely air so thin ♪
656
00:40:31,635 --> 00:40:34,137
[sniffling]
657
00:40:42,813 --> 00:40:46,400
♪ No one's gone in vain ♪
658
00:40:47,109 --> 00:40:47,943
Meredith.
659
00:40:48,026 --> 00:40:51,071
♪ Here is where you'll stay ♪
660
00:40:53,031 --> 00:40:55,867
♪ This life has been insane ♪
661
00:40:58,328 --> 00:41:01,206
♪ Today has been OK ♪
662
00:41:03,375 --> 00:41:06,044
♪ Today has been OK ♪
663
00:41:06,336 --> 00:41:09,506
[Meredith] The very worst part is thatthe minute you think you're past it,
664
00:41:11,341 --> 00:41:12,801
it starts all over again.
665
00:41:13,885 --> 00:41:16,972
♪ Today has been OK ♪
666
00:41:19,725 --> 00:41:21,768
[Cristina] And always, every time...
667
00:41:22,811 --> 00:41:24,521
George O'Malley died.
668
00:41:27,566 --> 00:41:29,026
...it takes your breath away.
669
00:41:38,702 --> 00:41:40,704
[Meredith] There are five stages of grief.
670
00:41:41,997 --> 00:41:43,874
They look different on all of us.
671
00:41:44,082 --> 00:41:45,917
But there are always five.
672
00:41:46,001 --> 00:41:49,880
I know you all have heard a lot
of rumors, and I'm sorry for that.
673
00:41:50,172 --> 00:41:51,340
[Alex] Denial.
674
00:41:51,423 --> 00:41:55,344
And what I'm about to say will be hard
to hear, and I'm sorry for that as well.
675
00:41:55,510 --> 00:41:56,428
[Derek] Anger.
676
00:41:56,511 --> 00:42:00,724
The economic climate is...
You all know what it is.
677
00:42:01,475 --> 00:42:05,312
In the coming weeks,
Seattle Grace Hospital
678
00:42:05,520 --> 00:42:09,066
- will be merging with Mercy West.
- [all murmuring]
679
00:42:09,358 --> 00:42:10,859
[Bailey] Bargaining.
680
00:42:10,942 --> 00:42:13,779
[Richard] I wish I could tell you
you'll all survive the merger,
681
00:42:14,738 --> 00:42:17,282
but there are only so many jobs.
And the board and I
682
00:42:17,366 --> 00:42:19,076
have some tough choices to make.
683
00:42:19,368 --> 00:42:20,535
[Lexie] Depression.
684
00:42:20,619 --> 00:42:22,079
[Richard] I'm on your side, people.
685
00:42:22,621 --> 00:42:24,539
I'm rooting for every one of you.
686
00:42:25,374 --> 00:42:31,213
All I can say is please,
be at your very best.
687
00:42:41,098 --> 00:42:42,516
[Richard] Acceptance.
55599
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