All language subtitles for Age Before Beauty - 01x01 - Episode 1.ORGANiC.English.C.updated.Addic7ed.com

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,236 --> 00:00:04,171 Mirror, mirror on the wall... 2 00:00:04,874 --> 00:00:06,994 Who's the fairest of them all? 3 00:00:08,213 --> 00:00:10,612 Age before beauty... 4 00:00:11,068 --> 00:00:13,087 Pearls before swine... 5 00:00:13,580 --> 00:00:15,985 Handsome Prince Charming... 6 00:00:16,168 --> 00:00:17,453 Will you be mine? 7 00:00:22,601 --> 00:00:26,267 Sync & corrections by emeline-whovian www.addic7ed.com 8 00:00:42,700 --> 00:00:45,945 Hi! I'm Leanne. Creative Director at MirrorBel Beauty 9 00:00:45,980 --> 00:00:50,585 filler queen, botox bitch, go-to girl for full facial rejuvenation. 10 00:00:50,620 --> 00:00:52,265 Say something about our USP. 11 00:00:52,300 --> 00:00:54,425 - Our what? - You know, what we do, what we offer. 12 00:00:54,460 --> 00:00:55,585 Oh... 13 00:00:55,620 --> 00:00:57,945 Youth, in a bottle, on a stick. 14 00:00:57,980 --> 00:00:59,985 Because, let me tell you, in this day and age, 15 00:01:00,020 --> 00:01:01,505 getting old's not an option. 16 00:01:03,679 --> 00:01:06,924 Heidi, lash queen. What can I say? 17 00:01:07,220 --> 00:01:09,305 New brows can take ten years off you! 18 00:01:09,340 --> 00:01:11,825 It's not about looks, it's about self-esteem. 19 00:01:11,860 --> 00:01:13,705 It's a passport to selfie heaven. 20 00:01:13,740 --> 00:01:15,785 It's a face-lift for your life. 21 00:01:17,693 --> 00:01:19,698 Tina. Tats. End of. 22 00:01:19,802 --> 00:01:23,534 Ivy-Rae - tanning, waxing... dogging. 23 00:01:23,570 --> 00:01:25,225 Last one by appointment only. 24 00:01:25,260 --> 00:01:26,985 Mum, behave! 25 00:01:27,020 --> 00:01:28,505 Did I mention that I'm in charge? 26 00:01:28,540 --> 00:01:30,385 I'm Bel and I'm... 27 00:01:30,420 --> 00:01:32,305 Back and kicking ass! 28 00:01:32,340 --> 00:01:33,865 Back, and answerable to me! 29 00:01:33,900 --> 00:01:35,065 Don't point it at me! 30 00:01:35,100 --> 00:01:37,185 I'm 100% not going to be here in six months' time. 31 00:01:37,220 --> 00:01:39,385 Do you hear that, Dad? Do we believe her? 32 00:01:44,940 --> 00:01:46,305 I'm absolutely fine! 33 00:01:47,740 --> 00:01:49,065 Oh, that looks lovely. 34 00:01:49,100 --> 00:01:50,345 All done! 35 00:01:50,380 --> 00:01:52,425 Little princess good to go! 36 00:01:52,879 --> 00:01:55,124 Breathe, Disney. Go inside. 37 00:01:58,180 --> 00:02:00,145 Right, hop it. 38 00:02:00,180 --> 00:02:01,625 OK, we are done, guys. 39 00:02:01,660 --> 00:02:03,585 Wes, Teddy, can you bring the cars round? 40 00:02:03,620 --> 00:02:06,345 Tina, supplies. Lex, keep shooting. 41 00:02:06,380 --> 00:02:08,305 Tyler, our Heidi's mascara? 42 00:02:08,340 --> 00:02:09,985 And, Mum, are you seeing to Dad? 43 00:02:10,020 --> 00:02:11,665 What am I? Mary Poppins? 44 00:02:17,940 --> 00:02:19,170 Are you kidding? 45 00:02:19,940 --> 00:02:21,155 Bloody hell. 46 00:02:24,580 --> 00:02:25,825 Stick it in there. 47 00:02:25,860 --> 00:02:28,265 - Give me that, give me that. - Oh, ta, love. 48 00:02:34,220 --> 00:02:36,732 Right, Tyler, Lex, with us. 49 00:02:37,180 --> 00:02:38,825 Leanne, Heidi, Diz... 50 00:02:38,860 --> 00:02:40,625 - This way. - Bloody hell. Where do I go? 51 00:02:40,660 --> 00:02:42,105 Who's got Dad? 52 00:02:42,140 --> 00:02:44,420 Don't look at me. I'm with Hector. 53 00:02:46,500 --> 00:02:48,860 I'll take him. Dad, come with me. 54 00:02:49,508 --> 00:02:52,423 All right, in the cars. I'll lock up. 55 00:02:53,860 --> 00:02:55,231 Get off. 56 00:02:55,900 --> 00:02:58,065 Phone! Left it on the desk! 57 00:02:58,100 --> 00:02:59,265 Oh! 58 00:03:46,238 --> 00:03:48,632 _ 59 00:03:51,751 --> 00:03:54,105 - Goin' Crash first or Blitz? - Rampage. 60 00:03:54,140 --> 00:03:56,025 Yeah, I just messaged Livvy, she said nine. 61 00:03:56,060 --> 00:03:58,305 - Where do we get our wristbands? - Wearing? Arsed? 62 00:03:58,340 --> 00:04:00,298 - Going to get wrecked whatever. - Tell him Jaeger Bomb. 63 00:04:00,334 --> 00:04:02,459 - Cheeky Vimto! - Voddy Red Bull. 64 00:04:02,560 --> 00:04:03,605 Woo Woo! 65 00:04:04,962 --> 00:04:06,059 Freshers Week! 66 00:04:06,095 --> 00:04:07,145 - No. - Joking, aren't you?! 67 00:04:07,180 --> 00:04:08,305 See what we missed? 68 00:04:08,340 --> 00:04:09,945 I'm not going to sleep for a week. 69 00:04:09,980 --> 00:04:11,745 Cos what's the point in leaving home... 70 00:04:27,660 --> 00:04:30,065 Don't forget your money belts, keep an eye on your phones, 71 00:04:30,100 --> 00:04:32,465 and make sure no-one spikes your drinks. 72 00:04:32,500 --> 00:04:34,820 Bel, it's Leeds, it's not Bogota. 73 00:04:38,380 --> 00:04:39,620 See you, Mum. 74 00:04:40,440 --> 00:04:41,520 Oh. 75 00:04:43,140 --> 00:04:45,980 Yeah, of course. Leave you to it. 76 00:04:52,740 --> 00:04:55,008 - See you, love. - See you later, Dad. 77 00:04:56,020 --> 00:04:58,305 We'll be fine, Mum. Just go home and forget we exist! 78 00:04:58,340 --> 00:04:59,820 Yeah, sure, I'll do that. 79 00:05:23,827 --> 00:05:25,512 End 'o the day, though, pat on the back. 80 00:05:25,548 --> 00:05:27,233 Aww, lovely kids. 81 00:05:27,269 --> 00:05:28,994 Yeah, turned out nice. 82 00:05:29,030 --> 00:05:30,795 I hope so. She gave up enough for them. 83 00:05:30,831 --> 00:05:33,196 - I couldn't do it. - You didn't do it. 84 00:05:33,232 --> 00:05:34,757 Oh, it is Bel, though, innit? 85 00:05:34,793 --> 00:05:36,198 Full-on or not at all. 86 00:05:36,234 --> 00:05:38,704 Oh, snore! What's she done? 87 00:05:38,740 --> 00:05:40,825 Popped out two sprogs, sent 'em to uni, 88 00:05:40,860 --> 00:05:42,308 - that's an achievement? - Yeah. 89 00:05:42,344 --> 00:05:44,629 Some of us got a life and a career. 90 00:05:44,665 --> 00:05:46,430 And kept our looks. 91 00:05:46,466 --> 00:05:47,726 Hello! 92 00:05:57,980 --> 00:06:00,820 It's an hour away. They'll be back and forth all the time. 93 00:06:05,140 --> 00:06:07,220 Plus, we now get an extra 12 hours in a day. 94 00:06:09,060 --> 00:06:10,540 What we going to do with that? 95 00:06:21,700 --> 00:06:23,785 - Should I call them? - Don't call them. 96 00:06:23,820 --> 00:06:27,265 What's Ty like with keys? And Lex has got no sense of direction. 97 00:06:27,300 --> 00:06:30,109 Bel, let's for once have a conversation which is not about 98 00:06:30,145 --> 00:06:31,630 the kids. 99 00:06:35,366 --> 00:06:39,011 Hello! Sister act to the rescue! 100 00:06:39,180 --> 00:06:40,905 I know, sweetie, I know. 101 00:06:40,940 --> 00:06:43,682 End of an era, empty nest. Gutted. 102 00:06:43,865 --> 00:06:45,870 Moving on. Yeah? Let it go. 103 00:06:45,906 --> 00:06:47,271 Cheers, Lea. 104 00:06:47,307 --> 00:06:49,912 So, me, how am I doing? 105 00:06:50,180 --> 00:06:52,785 Well, since you ask - stressed. 106 00:06:52,820 --> 00:06:54,585 Oh, my God. They're doin' my head in. 107 00:06:54,620 --> 00:06:56,465 - Who, Mum, Tina, Heidi? - All three. 108 00:06:56,500 --> 00:06:58,345 And me dad, especially me dad. 109 00:06:58,380 --> 00:07:00,425 Ted, I did say we should leave 'em alone tonight. 110 00:07:00,460 --> 00:07:02,925 Erm, hello? Insensitive? 111 00:07:03,140 --> 00:07:04,693 Moral support fail? 112 00:07:05,299 --> 00:07:10,384 So, Dad latest - wheelchair's shit, wants a new one, motorised. Why? 113 00:07:10,420 --> 00:07:12,731 Never goes anywhere! Oh, an' don't get me started on the salon! 114 00:07:12,767 --> 00:07:13,588 We won't. 115 00:07:13,624 --> 00:07:16,264 Why am I still grafting away at the coalface? 116 00:07:16,300 --> 00:07:18,145 Have I or have I not done my time? 117 00:07:18,180 --> 00:07:20,145 - You have done your time. - I've done my time! 118 00:07:20,180 --> 00:07:22,585 Fillers? Botox? Up to here with lipo! 119 00:07:22,620 --> 00:07:24,145 I should not be doing lipo. 120 00:07:24,180 --> 00:07:26,946 I should not be the arse-end of the business. 121 00:07:26,982 --> 00:07:29,187 - I should be the face. - And how're you, Ted? 122 00:07:29,223 --> 00:07:33,703 Hello? Sweetie? Can we get some menus? 123 00:07:36,210 --> 00:07:37,735 You OK? 124 00:07:37,771 --> 00:07:39,856 Few things kicking off. 125 00:07:40,104 --> 00:07:41,629 Business stuff. 126 00:07:41,665 --> 00:07:43,430 It'll keep. 127 00:07:43,539 --> 00:07:45,584 This is your night, I'm not going to let 128 00:07:45,620 --> 00:07:46,940 anything spoil it. 129 00:07:52,660 --> 00:07:54,020 OK. Where were we? 130 00:07:55,300 --> 00:07:59,105 Four hours getting ready and you drag me away? 131 00:07:59,140 --> 00:08:01,465 Spray tan, glycolic peel, lash extensions. 132 00:08:01,500 --> 00:08:02,705 None of which you need. 133 00:08:02,740 --> 00:08:04,945 It's not for me, Teddy Bear. It's for her! 134 00:08:04,980 --> 00:08:06,665 To show her what she's missing. 135 00:08:06,700 --> 00:08:08,905 - Did you not see her roots? - No. 136 00:08:08,940 --> 00:08:11,105 My God, she looks her age! 137 00:08:11,140 --> 00:08:13,785 No wonder Wes had nothing to say to her. 138 00:08:13,820 --> 00:08:16,025 They're in shock, Leanne. Their kids just left home. 139 00:08:16,060 --> 00:08:19,705 Yeah, and without them all he's got to look at is that. 140 00:08:19,740 --> 00:08:20,788 Baby Bear! 141 00:08:20,824 --> 00:08:22,389 There's no excuse. 142 00:08:22,717 --> 00:08:25,082 - In this day and age... - "Getting old is not an option"? 143 00:08:25,180 --> 00:08:26,620 I rest my case. 144 00:08:30,032 --> 00:08:31,997 Did she take a fleece? 145 00:08:32,940 --> 00:08:36,220 No, cos Leeds is that bit further up north and the wind is murder. 146 00:08:39,900 --> 00:08:41,705 Did Ty say anything to you about boots? 147 00:08:41,740 --> 00:08:44,585 Cos I said to him, "Tyler, in all honesty, Converse is not 148 00:08:44,620 --> 00:08:45,900 "a winter shoe." 149 00:08:54,300 --> 00:08:55,500 What was up with Teddy? 150 00:09:05,590 --> 00:09:08,574 _ 151 00:09:18,420 --> 00:09:20,825 Last push! Keep those knees up. 152 00:09:20,860 --> 00:09:26,185 Five, four, three, two, one. 153 00:09:26,220 --> 00:09:27,585 Well done. 154 00:09:27,620 --> 00:09:30,065 - I'll see you next time. - See you! 155 00:09:30,100 --> 00:09:32,265 Pain! 156 00:09:32,300 --> 00:09:34,980 It's just weakness leaving the body. You'll be all right. 157 00:09:42,600 --> 00:09:44,080 Hey, Baby Bear. 158 00:09:46,020 --> 00:09:48,065 I've had a thought... 159 00:09:48,100 --> 00:09:50,265 No, Leanne. 160 00:09:50,500 --> 00:09:51,660 Leanne! 161 00:09:55,220 --> 00:09:58,884 OK, yes, yes, I will be there. 162 00:10:01,980 --> 00:10:05,585 "So, Bel, now that you've got all this time on your hands..." 163 00:10:05,620 --> 00:10:08,185 "Fancy helping out at the salon?" 164 00:10:08,220 --> 00:10:11,065 For no money and zero thanks, in a place which used to be yours, 165 00:10:11,100 --> 00:10:14,025 but which your rent-a-gob sister has driven into the ground by 166 00:10:14,060 --> 00:10:16,820 the sheer, breathtaking scale of her incompetence. 167 00:10:18,040 --> 00:10:19,240 Take your body armour. 168 00:10:36,580 --> 00:10:39,065 Show us what you're made of! 169 00:10:39,100 --> 00:10:42,265 - Go on! - I seriously wouldn't push your luck. 170 00:10:42,300 --> 00:10:43,665 Your problem?! 171 00:10:43,700 --> 00:10:46,825 The cheatin', lyin' whore I married. 172 00:10:46,860 --> 00:10:48,985 - Define "married." - Define bollocks. 173 00:10:49,020 --> 00:10:50,625 - Lost yours! - What happened? 174 00:10:50,660 --> 00:10:52,345 Your father's a prick! 175 00:10:52,380 --> 00:10:53,457 Your mother's a tramp! 176 00:10:53,493 --> 00:10:55,098 - Who is it this time? - Hector. 177 00:10:55,134 --> 00:10:58,139 Hector El Xavier del Santos de Macarena. 178 00:10:58,175 --> 00:10:59,380 Bullfighter. 179 00:10:59,416 --> 00:11:00,621 Yes, right! 180 00:11:00,980 --> 00:11:03,865 So he starts training at the gym and I'm lifting, 181 00:11:03,900 --> 00:11:05,940 he likes me, clean-and-jerk. 182 00:11:06,963 --> 00:11:08,328 We click. 183 00:11:08,364 --> 00:11:09,609 Trollope! 184 00:11:09,645 --> 00:11:13,770 Can't hack it? Because you've retired and I'm still swinging! 185 00:11:13,806 --> 00:11:15,766 - Let's go, Dad. - Bloody right, let's go. 186 00:11:24,338 --> 00:11:26,383 Predictable as ever. 187 00:11:26,419 --> 00:11:29,819 Show her a Brazilian with biceps, her tongue's draggin' the floor. 188 00:11:30,287 --> 00:11:32,292 Hey! Hey! 189 00:11:33,180 --> 00:11:34,825 What's he doin' here? 190 00:11:34,860 --> 00:11:36,025 He's tagged! 191 00:11:36,060 --> 00:11:37,700 Get him home, you daft bladder! 192 00:11:39,220 --> 00:11:42,145 I thought as she got older, she'd put it about a bit less. 193 00:11:42,180 --> 00:11:44,900 But no, there's life in the old bitch yet. 194 00:11:55,868 --> 00:11:58,272 Can I get you anything, Wesley? 195 00:11:58,820 --> 00:12:00,427 Erm... 196 00:12:01,180 --> 00:12:02,505 Anything at all? 197 00:12:02,540 --> 00:12:04,020 I'm... I'm good, ta. 198 00:12:05,596 --> 00:12:07,980 Age is just a number, Wesley. 199 00:12:08,780 --> 00:12:10,420 Tell that to me arthritis! 200 00:12:30,782 --> 00:12:33,087 _ 201 00:12:33,123 --> 00:12:38,289 _ 202 00:12:47,606 --> 00:12:51,298 _ 203 00:12:56,620 --> 00:12:58,425 Cheers for this, Bel. It's high time. 204 00:12:58,460 --> 00:13:01,665 It was Ted's idea, help take my mind off the kids leaving. 205 00:13:01,700 --> 00:13:03,145 Oh, Leanne's got no system. 206 00:13:03,180 --> 00:13:05,545 Half that stuff's way past its sell-by date. 207 00:13:05,580 --> 00:13:06,900 Feel right at home. 208 00:13:15,871 --> 00:13:16,911 What? 209 00:13:19,682 --> 00:13:20,842 Tell me. 210 00:13:22,090 --> 00:13:25,495 You know I've always envied you? The way you've done your own thing, 211 00:13:25,531 --> 00:13:28,816 stayed out of the dramas, the fisticuffs. 212 00:13:28,852 --> 00:13:30,240 Yes? 213 00:13:30,276 --> 00:13:32,892 Well, obviously, I don't have that luxury. 214 00:13:32,928 --> 00:13:36,405 As accountant, looking after the family business, the building, 215 00:13:36,440 --> 00:13:38,000 the lease. 216 00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:41,685 You know, I love your sister. 217 00:13:41,720 --> 00:13:43,085 I should hope so. You married her. 218 00:13:43,120 --> 00:13:45,295 Between ourselves, Leanne... 219 00:13:46,240 --> 00:13:47,520 Is out of her depth? 220 00:13:48,640 --> 00:13:52,805 This place - the business - it's been going downhill 221 00:13:52,840 --> 00:13:55,045 - ever since you left. - What, 20 years ago? 222 00:13:55,080 --> 00:13:58,485 I accept when you walked away, you washed your hands of it. 223 00:13:58,520 --> 00:14:00,529 But I thought... 224 00:14:00,880 --> 00:14:02,725 if you knew what was going on... 225 00:14:02,760 --> 00:14:04,598 Well, how bad is it? 226 00:14:05,480 --> 00:14:06,640 About to go bust. 227 00:14:11,160 --> 00:14:14,005 The thing is, they don't really run it like a business. 228 00:14:14,040 --> 00:14:16,685 It's more like their own personal pamper-party. 229 00:14:16,720 --> 00:14:18,285 I want to see the manager. 230 00:14:18,320 --> 00:14:20,685 - And as for customer service... - About? 231 00:14:20,720 --> 00:14:23,645 Yesterday, I had a chemical peel. Today I look like Freddy Kruger. 232 00:14:23,680 --> 00:14:25,005 It's lovely that, yeah. 233 00:14:25,040 --> 00:14:27,925 Heidi, Heidi, can you deal with this? 234 00:14:27,960 --> 00:14:30,685 - You what? Me? - Yeah. Thanks, Heidi. 235 00:14:30,720 --> 00:14:31,845 That looks sore. 236 00:14:31,880 --> 00:14:33,285 Tell me about it. 237 00:14:33,320 --> 00:14:35,685 Um, Tina? Can you speak to this gentleman? 238 00:14:35,720 --> 00:14:37,765 - Are you the manager? - Not really. 239 00:14:37,800 --> 00:14:40,925 Are you sure we did that? I don't remember you coming in. 240 00:14:40,960 --> 00:14:43,965 - Are you the manager? - Sack the attitude, pal! 241 00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:45,480 Are you calling me a liar? 242 00:14:46,920 --> 00:14:50,525 Dob him a tenner, tell him to sling his sorry arse. 243 00:14:50,560 --> 00:14:53,062 - Can I help at all? - Manager? 244 00:14:53,098 --> 00:14:54,378 I used to be. 245 00:14:55,280 --> 00:14:58,232 And I can see that you've had a bad reaction. 246 00:14:58,520 --> 00:15:01,165 Would you say that your skin's hypersensitive? 247 00:15:01,200 --> 00:15:02,435 It is now. 248 00:15:02,600 --> 00:15:05,005 How about a complimentary course of three treatments, 249 00:15:05,040 --> 00:15:07,165 specifically tailored to your skin type? 250 00:15:07,200 --> 00:15:10,085 So we can show you this was just a really unfortunate one-off. 251 00:15:10,120 --> 00:15:13,400 And I can personally guarantee you'll be happy with the results. 252 00:15:14,600 --> 00:15:15,765 OK. 253 00:15:15,800 --> 00:15:18,234 - Tomorrow at two? - Deal. 254 00:15:24,720 --> 00:15:26,033 What? 255 00:15:26,280 --> 00:15:28,645 Couldn't give 'em a crash course in how to run a business? 256 00:15:28,680 --> 00:15:31,533 Reagan rule number one - do it yourself. 257 00:15:34,080 --> 00:15:35,081 Could you? 258 00:15:37,347 --> 00:15:40,107 No, Bel, you can't take this on. 259 00:15:41,920 --> 00:15:44,480 No-one'll thank you for it. Least of all Leanne. 260 00:15:45,680 --> 00:15:47,040 So I just let them go under? 261 00:15:49,240 --> 00:15:52,525 So Bel's going to be helping us out from now on. 262 00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:56,325 Dogsbody work. And obviously she'll be answering to me, but since 263 00:15:56,360 --> 00:15:58,206 I've got better things to do than hold her hand... 264 00:15:58,242 --> 00:15:59,195 Like? 265 00:16:00,520 --> 00:16:01,805 Visiting trade fairs. 266 00:16:01,840 --> 00:16:03,725 - Oh, bloody hell. - Testing out new products 267 00:16:03,760 --> 00:16:05,925 and handling the people side of the business. 268 00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:10,845 Right, well, I'm more than happy for Bel to do all the dirty work. 269 00:16:10,880 --> 00:16:12,280 Great! 270 00:16:13,480 --> 00:16:15,485 And y'can sack that, madam! You know the rules. 271 00:16:15,520 --> 00:16:17,205 - Mum, why? - Don't get any big ideas. 272 00:16:17,240 --> 00:16:18,480 I'm just here to help. 273 00:16:22,760 --> 00:16:24,205 Hmm! 274 00:16:24,240 --> 00:16:26,765 I give it three months, max. 275 00:16:26,800 --> 00:16:29,365 It'll take more than that to get it back on its feet. 276 00:16:29,400 --> 00:16:30,645 Once it's paying its way... 277 00:16:30,680 --> 00:16:32,165 - You can retire? - Again. 278 00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:34,085 Always said that was a mistake. 279 00:16:34,120 --> 00:16:35,525 You, giving up the place. 280 00:16:35,560 --> 00:16:37,685 When you had it, it was buzzing. 281 00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:40,360 - Real life kicked in. - A different life. 282 00:16:41,120 --> 00:16:44,005 I'm not dissing it. Wife and mum, best job in the world. 283 00:16:44,040 --> 00:16:46,240 It's just, I always thought you'd be that... 284 00:16:47,560 --> 00:16:48,965 ..and then some. 285 00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:51,521 - I thought so, too. - Well... 286 00:16:51,937 --> 00:16:53,177 now's your chance. 287 00:16:54,160 --> 00:16:55,400 If only for a few weeks. 288 00:16:57,520 --> 00:16:59,405 Well, I best get some slap on. 289 00:16:59,440 --> 00:17:01,920 - Not exactly a great advert, am I? - Oh! 290 00:17:03,240 --> 00:17:06,120 - And Wes is cool with it, yeah? - Does he have a choice? 291 00:17:15,320 --> 00:17:17,005 Hello, Wesley Finch. 292 00:17:17,040 --> 00:17:18,320 Yeah. 293 00:17:21,880 --> 00:17:23,605 Recommended? That's always nice to hear. 294 00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:24,920 What can I do for you? 295 00:17:26,960 --> 00:17:29,685 So, I'll get you a quote by the end of tomorrow. 296 00:17:29,720 --> 00:17:31,925 In the meantime, I'll send you a link to some websites 297 00:17:31,960 --> 00:17:35,085 where you can look at work-tops, colours, hardware... 298 00:17:35,120 --> 00:17:36,320 That'd be great. 299 00:17:39,880 --> 00:17:43,000 - Who's the fitness freak? - Hey, not me! This place belongs to... 300 00:17:43,979 --> 00:17:47,564 - Surprise! - Hello? 301 00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:51,205 This is Wesley. He's going to be doing the new kitchen. 302 00:17:51,240 --> 00:17:52,662 What new kitchen? 303 00:17:55,885 --> 00:17:57,525 Would you excuse us for a second? 304 00:18:03,440 --> 00:18:04,965 You said you need a new kitchen. 305 00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:06,685 You said I needed a new kitchen. 306 00:18:06,720 --> 00:18:09,685 Lols, you've worked your little tush off for the past two years! 307 00:18:09,720 --> 00:18:12,927 This guy comes highly recommended. 308 00:18:13,160 --> 00:18:15,280 I just want you to have something for you. 309 00:18:24,240 --> 00:18:25,697 Hello. 310 00:18:25,840 --> 00:18:27,965 Can we start again? I'm Lorelei. 311 00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:29,280 Wesley. 312 00:18:52,640 --> 00:18:53,800 Deja vu? 313 00:18:56,880 --> 00:18:58,660 You, stood there. 314 00:19:02,440 --> 00:19:04,125 We're not all shit, you know. 315 00:19:04,160 --> 00:19:06,440 - Least, I'm not. - I know that. 316 00:19:07,800 --> 00:19:11,432 When you left, all the oomph went out of it. 317 00:19:11,760 --> 00:19:15,005 Leanne's got the gob, but she knows jack about running a business. 318 00:19:15,040 --> 00:19:18,765 - Well, why did no-one ever say anything? - Just want to do what I do. 319 00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:22,085 I don't want to be in charge. Just want to do me job 320 00:19:22,120 --> 00:19:24,428 and take me wage home at end of t'week. 321 00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:29,082 And Heidi and Mum, they're not bad neither. 322 00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:32,920 They just need pointing in the right direction. 323 00:19:38,295 --> 00:19:39,851 I don't know. 324 00:19:40,920 --> 00:19:44,565 I think Wes was hoping we'd have a bit of space now the kids have gone. 325 00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:46,685 Do more stuff together. 326 00:19:47,063 --> 00:19:48,703 And Wes is a guy, right? 327 00:19:49,640 --> 00:19:53,438 Trust me, they don't even notice. 328 00:20:28,560 --> 00:20:30,165 Did you always want to be a joiner? 329 00:20:30,200 --> 00:20:32,805 No, I wanted to be a Jedi. 330 00:20:32,840 --> 00:20:35,138 - You? - Wookiee. 331 00:20:36,240 --> 00:20:37,804 That's right. 332 00:20:38,320 --> 00:20:39,725 What went wrong? 333 00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:43,685 Oh, you know, lack of facial hair, poor piloting skills. 334 00:20:43,720 --> 00:20:45,245 So now you're a PT? 335 00:20:45,280 --> 00:20:47,016 Living the dream! 336 00:20:47,200 --> 00:20:50,994 Why the hell not? Life's too short. Do what you love. 337 00:20:51,440 --> 00:20:54,205 - So, do you love kitchens? - I love creating things. 338 00:20:54,240 --> 00:20:56,445 You know, making something out of nothing. 339 00:20:56,480 --> 00:20:58,645 Yeah, and me. When somebody comes to me 340 00:20:58,680 --> 00:21:01,245 and they're so unfit they can barely touch their toes. 341 00:21:01,280 --> 00:21:02,444 That's me! 342 00:21:02,480 --> 00:21:05,565 Well, I love helping them be better than they ever dreamed they could be. 343 00:21:05,600 --> 00:21:07,860 Some of us are too old to learn new tricks. 344 00:21:08,480 --> 00:21:10,920 - That's not true. - Want to bet? 345 00:21:12,440 --> 00:21:14,277 I would, actually. 346 00:21:18,160 --> 00:21:20,325 What we need is a face-lift. 347 00:21:20,360 --> 00:21:24,897 New fixtures, new fittings, new colour scheme, new image. 348 00:21:24,933 --> 00:21:26,378 Good luck with that. We're skint. 349 00:21:26,414 --> 00:21:29,565 Well, Wesley's mate Josh'll do a lick of paint in exchange for botox. 350 00:21:29,600 --> 00:21:30,805 Yeah, right. 351 00:21:30,840 --> 00:21:33,565 Mate Fred'll sort the plumbing in exchange for a Wolverine tattoo. 352 00:21:33,600 --> 00:21:35,845 - As if! - Wes'll do new work-surfaces. 353 00:21:35,880 --> 00:21:39,245 Oh, on the promotion front - website? Facebook? Twitter? 354 00:21:39,280 --> 00:21:41,325 - No. - I'll ask Lexie. 355 00:21:41,360 --> 00:21:44,325 She'll shoot us a promo. Tyler'll style it. 356 00:21:44,360 --> 00:21:47,885 We need to showcase all the services that we offer. 357 00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:51,075 And how exactly are we going to do that? 358 00:21:51,440 --> 00:21:55,245 By giving Diz the ultimate makeover for her beauty pageant! 359 00:21:55,280 --> 00:21:56,525 Oh. 360 00:21:56,560 --> 00:21:58,528 Breathe, Disney. 361 00:21:59,080 --> 00:22:00,445 Concentrate! 362 00:22:00,480 --> 00:22:02,285 OK, so, Mum, you'll do... 363 00:22:02,320 --> 00:22:03,765 Spray-tan, shimmer. 364 00:22:03,800 --> 00:22:06,085 - Heidi? - Brows, lashes. 365 00:22:06,120 --> 00:22:07,525 - Tina? - Eyeliner. 366 00:22:07,560 --> 00:22:10,805 - Permanent? - Nah. Last time, school sent her home. 367 00:22:10,840 --> 00:22:12,085 Unbelievable! 368 00:22:12,120 --> 00:22:14,445 How is that the message? "Don't look your best, girls." 369 00:22:14,480 --> 00:22:17,205 - "Don't make the most of your assets." - Yeah. 370 00:22:17,240 --> 00:22:20,605 I know, but it's a fascinating way to showcase the treatments, so... 371 00:22:20,640 --> 00:22:22,525 - No judgment. - No judgment. 372 00:22:22,560 --> 00:22:24,365 Three, four, five, six. 373 00:22:24,400 --> 00:22:26,725 Bend over. Big kiss right to the back of the room. 374 00:22:26,760 --> 00:22:28,565 You want everybody to feel that. 375 00:22:57,960 --> 00:22:59,120 You all right? 376 00:23:00,640 --> 00:23:02,200 Oh, hello. 377 00:23:03,240 --> 00:23:05,845 OK, we're going to take this nice and slow. 378 00:23:05,880 --> 00:23:07,559 How slow? 379 00:23:07,840 --> 00:23:09,645 You won't even know it's happening. 380 00:23:09,680 --> 00:23:11,440 - OK. - Shall we stretch? - Yeah. 381 00:23:17,520 --> 00:23:18,720 Hang on a minute. 382 00:23:36,400 --> 00:23:38,445 All right, Leanne, move! 383 00:23:38,480 --> 00:23:39,880 Leanne! 384 00:23:55,840 --> 00:23:57,320 Do you want that six-pack? 385 00:23:58,960 --> 00:24:00,600 Oh! Come on! 386 00:24:09,120 --> 00:24:10,965 Come on! Get up! What you doing? Get up! 387 00:24:11,000 --> 00:24:12,885 On the mat, on the mat, on the mat. 388 00:24:12,920 --> 00:24:14,885 Three, two, one! 389 00:24:14,920 --> 00:24:16,565 Oh! 390 00:24:16,600 --> 00:24:17,754 Oh! 391 00:24:18,120 --> 00:24:19,280 Christ! 392 00:24:20,331 --> 00:24:21,952 - How many? - 42. 393 00:24:21,988 --> 00:24:23,154 You're kidding! 394 00:24:23,480 --> 00:24:26,335 - Two weeks ago, I barely managed eight! - Yep! 395 00:24:26,760 --> 00:24:28,325 Wow. That's... 396 00:24:28,360 --> 00:24:29,605 Geez, I've not done... 397 00:24:29,640 --> 00:24:31,836 I've not done sit-ups since I was 20. 398 00:24:32,240 --> 00:24:34,518 I rest my case. 399 00:24:51,800 --> 00:24:53,418 What's got into you? 400 00:24:53,800 --> 00:24:56,365 42 sit-ups, 28 press-ups. 401 00:24:56,400 --> 00:24:58,085 You what? How? 402 00:24:58,120 --> 00:25:00,645 Client I'm doing a kitchen for, she's a PT. 403 00:25:00,680 --> 00:25:02,285 I bet her she couldn't get me fit. 404 00:25:02,320 --> 00:25:03,845 Think I'm going to lose. 405 00:25:03,880 --> 00:25:06,445 - What's Bel say? - I've not told her. 406 00:25:06,480 --> 00:25:08,251 Thought I'd wait and see if she spots the difference. 407 00:25:08,287 --> 00:25:09,501 And has she? 408 00:25:10,488 --> 00:25:11,920 I never see her. 409 00:25:11,956 --> 00:25:16,907 So what's she like, Miss PT? Built like a tank? 410 00:25:16,943 --> 00:25:20,303 Nah, she's cool, knows her stuff, knows how far to push it. 411 00:25:20,831 --> 00:25:21,851 Age? 412 00:25:21,887 --> 00:25:24,285 - Late 20s? - Fit? 413 00:25:24,320 --> 00:25:26,325 As you'd expect! 414 00:25:26,360 --> 00:25:28,120 Might ask Bel if she fancies a sesh. 415 00:25:29,880 --> 00:25:30,761 What? 416 00:25:30,797 --> 00:25:34,354 Basic rule of a happy marriage - never suggest the wife needs to get fit. 417 00:25:34,390 --> 00:25:36,980 Well, unless your PT does two for the price of one. 418 00:25:37,016 --> 00:25:38,805 Not mentioned Bel to her actually. 419 00:25:38,840 --> 00:25:41,045 That's fair enough. Could sound a bit crass. 420 00:25:41,080 --> 00:25:42,365 "Oh, by the way, I'm married - 421 00:25:42,400 --> 00:25:44,645 - "in case you're thinking of pouncing." - Who does that? 422 00:25:44,680 --> 00:25:46,000 Half your clients. 423 00:26:03,040 --> 00:26:04,605 Guess what I did today? 424 00:26:04,640 --> 00:26:06,365 You're awake. 425 00:26:06,400 --> 00:26:09,165 42 sit-ups, 28 press-ups. 426 00:26:09,200 --> 00:26:10,885 Someone been at the wacky backy? 427 00:26:10,920 --> 00:26:13,040 No, in the park with a PT. 428 00:26:14,560 --> 00:26:17,765 Client in town, we're doing a deal. She gets discount 429 00:26:17,800 --> 00:26:20,165 off her kitchen, I get discount off my sessions. 430 00:26:20,200 --> 00:26:21,645 Like you don't get enough exercise? 431 00:26:21,680 --> 00:26:23,485 This is different. 432 00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:27,359 This is about toning, building muscle. 433 00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:28,960 Feels great. 434 00:26:30,400 --> 00:26:32,160 I could book you a taster. 435 00:26:33,440 --> 00:26:35,040 I think I'll pass, thanks. 436 00:26:38,360 --> 00:26:42,506 Since I'm now back at the salon with barely time to even breathe. 437 00:26:43,840 --> 00:26:46,216 And loving every minute of it, by the way! 438 00:26:57,605 --> 00:26:59,090 Have you seen that? 439 00:26:59,680 --> 00:27:02,125 - Queues. - Yeah, since when do we have queues? 440 00:27:02,160 --> 00:27:03,525 Since Bel came back. 441 00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:05,325 And you're happy with that? 442 00:27:05,360 --> 00:27:07,125 You want to be grafting dawn till dusk? 443 00:27:07,160 --> 00:27:09,405 We had a cushy little gig until she gegged in. 444 00:27:09,440 --> 00:27:10,725 State of that column? 445 00:27:10,760 --> 00:27:12,765 Miss Popularity! 446 00:27:12,800 --> 00:27:14,885 You want more clients or you want less clients? 447 00:27:14,920 --> 00:27:16,805 Look at me, Miss Queen Bee, let's make Leanne 448 00:27:16,840 --> 00:27:18,725 - look all sad and clueless. - What? 449 00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:21,045 Is it me or is she always trying to put me down? 450 00:27:21,080 --> 00:27:22,885 It's you. 451 00:27:22,920 --> 00:27:25,939 Seriously? Bel just does her thing. 452 00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:28,931 Most of the time, I doubt she even knows you're there. 453 00:27:30,560 --> 00:27:32,845 - Hey, Sam, I haven't seen you for ages. - I know. 454 00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:36,085 - Have you been on holiday? - Yeah, I have actually. 455 00:27:36,120 --> 00:27:37,720 What are you booked in for? 456 00:27:39,920 --> 00:27:41,965 Kitchen finito. 457 00:27:42,000 --> 00:27:43,405 Wowzer! 458 00:27:43,440 --> 00:27:45,245 Old guy don't hang about. 459 00:27:45,280 --> 00:27:47,120 He's not old. 460 00:27:47,400 --> 00:27:50,200 - Are you going to miss him? - He's still doing PT sessions. 461 00:27:51,720 --> 00:27:54,965 - Crazy man! - I'm glad. I really like him. 462 00:27:55,000 --> 00:27:56,845 You know, I like his work ethic. 463 00:27:56,880 --> 00:27:59,925 He pushes himself, but he's not trying to prove anything. 464 00:27:59,960 --> 00:28:02,485 You know, committed but not obsessive. 465 00:28:02,520 --> 00:28:05,178 - Hello, Mr Perfect! - Yeah, he is. 466 00:28:06,920 --> 00:28:08,685 - Not like that. - Uh-huh? 467 00:28:08,720 --> 00:28:11,882 We're mates. I like being single! 468 00:28:12,640 --> 00:28:15,366 Besides, do I really need another relationship fail? 469 00:28:15,680 --> 00:28:17,000 Who says it'd be a fail? 470 00:28:23,216 --> 00:28:25,381 Hey, don't give me too much. Goes straight to my head! 471 00:28:25,417 --> 00:28:27,862 That's because you live on kale and chia seeds. 472 00:28:27,954 --> 00:28:29,359 So, do you like it? 473 00:28:29,395 --> 00:28:30,405 Love it! 474 00:28:30,440 --> 00:28:32,765 Seriously. Didn't know I needed it till I got it. 475 00:28:32,800 --> 00:28:36,085 Same here. Forgot how good it felt to be fit till someone reminded me. 476 00:28:36,120 --> 00:28:38,765 - So, cheers. - You did it! - We did it. 477 00:28:38,800 --> 00:28:40,165 We're a team. 478 00:28:40,200 --> 00:28:41,812 What do we call ourselves? 479 00:28:42,360 --> 00:28:44,050 Team Lor-A-Wes? 480 00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:46,667 Team Wes-A-Lei? 481 00:28:48,320 --> 00:28:49,605 Here's to us! 482 00:28:51,120 --> 00:28:53,445 Hey, stranger, it's your wife! 483 00:28:53,480 --> 00:28:56,685 I'm sorry. I know it's been weeks since we even saw daylight together, 484 00:28:56,720 --> 00:29:02,440 so I'm doing curry and I've got some wine. 485 00:29:05,080 --> 00:29:06,520 What are you doing? 486 00:29:08,240 --> 00:29:09,840 I can see what you're doing. Oi! 487 00:29:13,000 --> 00:29:15,605 Ready! Burpee. 488 00:29:15,640 --> 00:29:16,885 Press up. 489 00:29:16,920 --> 00:29:18,022 - Sit up! - Sit up. 490 00:29:18,058 --> 00:29:19,663 - Come on! - Yeah, all right, all right! 491 00:29:19,699 --> 00:29:22,499 Are you ready? A one, two, a one, two, three. 492 00:29:44,360 --> 00:29:45,725 Oh, hang on! 493 00:29:45,760 --> 00:29:46,965 Oh! 494 00:30:17,200 --> 00:30:18,680 Christ, Bel, where'd you go? 495 00:30:49,880 --> 00:30:51,605 Oh, Christ! 496 00:30:51,640 --> 00:30:53,125 I should go. 497 00:30:53,160 --> 00:30:55,965 - Really? - Sorry. That sounded rude. 498 00:30:56,000 --> 00:30:57,445 I have to be somewhere. 499 00:30:57,480 --> 00:31:00,005 Oh. That's a shame. 500 00:31:00,040 --> 00:31:01,360 Yeah, I should've said. 501 00:31:03,615 --> 00:31:05,740 Is something wrong? Did I do something? 502 00:31:05,923 --> 00:31:07,643 No! It's just... No, it's my fault. 503 00:31:08,520 --> 00:31:10,365 I should never have... 504 00:31:10,400 --> 00:31:11,645 I'm sorry. 505 00:31:11,680 --> 00:31:13,423 Is it because I'm a client? 506 00:31:13,760 --> 00:31:14,920 No. 507 00:31:16,160 --> 00:31:17,520 It's because I'm married. 508 00:31:23,680 --> 00:31:24,800 Ted... 509 00:31:26,440 --> 00:31:27,720 ..I've fucked up. 510 00:31:53,280 --> 00:31:54,525 Fuck! 511 00:31:54,560 --> 00:31:56,200 What was I thinking?! 512 00:31:58,040 --> 00:32:00,365 Bel can't know. Bel can never know. 513 00:32:00,400 --> 00:32:02,725 Because it is not the remotest threat to our marriage 514 00:32:02,760 --> 00:32:04,885 and it's never going to happen again. 515 00:32:04,920 --> 00:32:06,160 Obviously not. 516 00:32:09,080 --> 00:32:10,920 What's my excuse? Why am I back late? 517 00:32:12,160 --> 00:32:16,765 You were out with me. I wasn't drinking, but you were rat-arsed 518 00:32:16,800 --> 00:32:18,693 so I brought you home. 519 00:32:18,800 --> 00:32:20,525 You would say that for me? 520 00:32:20,560 --> 00:32:22,668 Do I want to see Bel hurt? 521 00:32:24,600 --> 00:32:27,605 Jaeger Bombs? What are you, 17? 522 00:32:27,640 --> 00:32:29,445 - I'm sorry. - I'll take him up. 523 00:32:29,480 --> 00:32:31,519 - Sorry. - Sorry. 524 00:32:48,680 --> 00:32:52,565 Hi! I'm Leanne. Creative Director at MirrorBel Beauty - 525 00:32:52,600 --> 00:32:57,205 filler queen, botox bitch, go-to girl for full facial rejuvenation. 526 00:32:57,240 --> 00:32:59,285 - Say something about our USP. - Our what? 527 00:32:59,320 --> 00:33:00,845 You know, what we do, what we offer? 528 00:33:00,880 --> 00:33:02,645 Oh. Youth! 529 00:33:02,680 --> 00:33:04,925 - In a bottle, on a stick. - Playin' a blinder, our Bel. 530 00:33:04,960 --> 00:33:06,600 - Back where she belongs, eh? - Aye. 531 00:33:07,640 --> 00:33:09,040 Heidi... 532 00:33:12,040 --> 00:33:14,886 OK, guys, well done! I'll see you all next week. 533 00:33:38,240 --> 00:33:40,497 Oh, my God. Swoon! 534 00:33:40,880 --> 00:33:42,525 Not swoon. 535 00:33:42,560 --> 00:33:43,925 Over. 536 00:33:43,960 --> 00:33:46,645 But why? You really like him. 537 00:33:46,680 --> 00:33:48,365 Is he bobbins in bed? 538 00:33:48,600 --> 00:33:51,080 No, he's amazing. 539 00:33:51,879 --> 00:33:54,924 He's also kind, funny, sensitive, smart. 540 00:33:54,960 --> 00:33:58,480 But he don't want to see you again? Is he cray? 541 00:33:58,840 --> 00:34:00,405 No, he's married. 542 00:34:00,440 --> 00:34:02,301 Holy shit! 543 00:34:02,400 --> 00:34:04,147 Seriously? 544 00:34:04,520 --> 00:34:07,255 Just when I thought I'd met a grown-up. 545 00:34:08,840 --> 00:34:10,885 This isn't right. He thinks he can screw you 546 00:34:10,920 --> 00:34:13,365 - and walk away and that's the end of it? - That is the end of it. 547 00:34:13,400 --> 00:34:17,005 No, no, no, you've invested. You've put yourself on the line. 548 00:34:17,040 --> 00:34:18,845 This is not what you deserve! 549 00:34:18,880 --> 00:34:20,346 What do I deserve? 550 00:34:21,040 --> 00:34:23,788 Respect... dignity. 551 00:34:23,905 --> 00:34:26,455 You need to be able to meet him face-to-face 552 00:34:26,491 --> 00:34:28,169 and say what you need to say. 553 00:34:28,280 --> 00:34:30,160 Otherwise, how will you ever move on? 554 00:34:31,600 --> 00:34:34,085 - I'll find a way. - But... - Dante... 555 00:34:34,760 --> 00:34:36,445 ..it's over. 556 00:34:36,480 --> 00:34:38,960 - Lorelei? - Oh, hang on. 557 00:34:40,400 --> 00:34:41,840 Yep? 558 00:34:42,840 --> 00:34:45,240 Is everything all right? Something happened? 559 00:34:52,640 --> 00:34:55,565 All done! Ta-dah! 560 00:34:55,600 --> 00:34:57,280 Little princess good to go! 561 00:34:58,440 --> 00:35:00,360 Breathe, Disney. Go inside. 562 00:35:04,960 --> 00:35:07,064 - Yep? - Problem. 563 00:35:08,280 --> 00:35:10,645 - She's bailed. - Explain? 564 00:35:10,680 --> 00:35:13,551 She don't do married men. What shall I do? 565 00:35:15,720 --> 00:35:17,725 - Sort it. - How? 566 00:35:17,760 --> 00:35:19,561 How do I sort it? 567 00:35:20,160 --> 00:35:21,360 Find a way. 568 00:35:23,040 --> 00:35:24,885 OK, we are done, guys. 569 00:35:24,920 --> 00:35:27,925 Wes, Teddy, can you bring the cars round? Tina, supplies. 570 00:35:27,960 --> 00:35:30,181 Lex, keep shooting. 571 00:35:33,600 --> 00:35:37,045 OK. Well, not to worry. Just make sure you rest it. 572 00:35:37,080 --> 00:35:40,525 Keep it elevated, ice it if you want to. 573 00:35:40,560 --> 00:35:46,165 When it starts to feel a bit better, you can stretch it out. 574 00:35:46,200 --> 00:35:48,560 If you've got any problems, just give me a text. 575 00:37:14,720 --> 00:37:17,616 Bel, will you tell her? Tell Diz she needs to run it! 576 00:37:17,652 --> 00:37:18,421 Yeah. 577 00:37:19,640 --> 00:37:23,165 - Bestie, you with me? - I've done it four times already. 578 00:37:23,200 --> 00:37:26,205 And this is number five, and then there'll be number six. 579 00:37:26,240 --> 00:37:28,885 Because what do we say? "Practice, practice, practice." 580 00:37:28,920 --> 00:37:31,365 You say "practice, practice, practice." 581 00:37:31,400 --> 00:37:33,725 Disney, is this for my benefit? 582 00:37:33,760 --> 00:37:38,045 This is BF - helping BF be the best she can be! 583 00:37:38,080 --> 00:37:42,245 I don't want a BF. I've got BFs. Lauren Carter and Tinsel Hayes. 584 00:37:42,280 --> 00:37:45,228 Sweetheart, they live on an estate. 585 00:37:45,800 --> 00:37:48,419 Is that the kind of friends you want? 586 00:37:48,960 --> 00:37:50,485 What do their parents do? 587 00:37:50,520 --> 00:37:52,685 Do they even know both their parents? 588 00:37:52,720 --> 00:37:54,685 Do I even know mine? 589 00:37:57,840 --> 00:38:00,285 This is your two minute call. That's two minutes 590 00:38:00,320 --> 00:38:01,685 to the final. 591 00:38:01,720 --> 00:38:04,285 If you could spare a few minutes from your empire-building, 592 00:38:04,320 --> 00:38:06,485 perhaps you'd be good enough to read Mum the Riot Act. 593 00:38:06,520 --> 00:38:08,101 What's she done now? 594 00:38:08,137 --> 00:38:10,285 Only gone and ditched me dad and moved out, again. 595 00:38:10,320 --> 00:38:14,067 Shh! Do you mind? It's upsetting Disney. 596 00:38:14,103 --> 00:38:16,081 Disney needs to get into the zone! 597 00:38:16,194 --> 00:38:17,925 When Disney gets stressed, it goes to her face 598 00:38:17,960 --> 00:38:19,365 and her make-up melts. 599 00:38:19,400 --> 00:38:20,765 - Ooh! - Can you sort it, Bel? 600 00:38:20,800 --> 00:38:22,725 "Can you sort it, Bel?" 601 00:38:22,760 --> 00:38:24,283 - Love it. - Sorry? 602 00:38:24,319 --> 00:38:25,645 You think you're so amazing. 603 00:38:25,680 --> 00:38:27,925 You think this is all about you. 604 00:38:27,960 --> 00:38:30,605 Well, I made the business what it is today... 605 00:38:30,640 --> 00:38:32,085 - Sure did. - ..and you can't stand it. 606 00:38:32,120 --> 00:38:34,645 Any more than you could stand losing Teddy! 607 00:38:34,680 --> 00:38:35,391 What? 608 00:38:35,427 --> 00:38:37,525 You wanted him. It was between you and me, 609 00:38:37,560 --> 00:38:40,325 and he chose me! You had to settle for second best. 610 00:38:40,360 --> 00:38:41,880 And everybody knows it. 611 00:38:47,000 --> 00:38:48,515 Hey, Ma, smile! 612 00:38:48,720 --> 00:38:51,160 Dad don't look too happy. What have you done to upset him? 613 00:39:14,040 --> 00:39:16,405 Can all parents now leave the backstage area 614 00:39:16,440 --> 00:39:18,000 and take their seats. 615 00:39:19,160 --> 00:39:22,125 Right, here we go. You know what to do, darling. Come on, Diz. 616 00:39:22,160 --> 00:39:24,325 I love you. You look beautiful. 617 00:39:24,360 --> 00:39:26,454 - All right, OK. - OK. All right. 618 00:39:29,600 --> 00:39:32,205 You were the best, baby girl. 619 00:39:32,240 --> 00:39:34,445 But they have to give other little girls a chance. 620 00:39:34,480 --> 00:39:35,965 You can't win everything. 621 00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:37,805 But I haven't won anything! 622 00:39:37,840 --> 00:39:41,205 Yeah, and that's because they know what a brave girl you are. 623 00:39:41,240 --> 00:39:42,760 You won't make a fuss. 624 00:39:47,840 --> 00:39:50,285 - Disney... - I should have to be doing this. 625 00:39:50,320 --> 00:39:52,325 She's your child. 626 00:39:52,360 --> 00:39:53,725 And where's her father? 627 00:39:53,760 --> 00:39:55,485 Who's the father? 628 00:39:55,520 --> 00:39:57,085 Perm any one from 12. 629 00:39:57,120 --> 00:39:58,965 Least they all play for the same team. 630 00:40:01,160 --> 00:40:03,085 Why is that funny? 631 00:40:03,120 --> 00:40:05,925 - Oh, come on, Bel. - What, because she's a bit flaky? 632 00:40:05,960 --> 00:40:09,525 Because her life's all over the place? Is yours so sorted? 633 00:40:09,560 --> 00:40:10,410 Me? 634 00:40:10,446 --> 00:40:13,708 Yeah, are you so pristine and pure and perfect? 635 00:40:15,440 --> 00:40:16,725 Dad, we're leaving. 636 00:40:16,760 --> 00:40:20,205 Bloody hell! Are we entering the Paralympics or what?! 637 00:40:20,240 --> 00:40:21,520 Bel? Bel? 638 00:40:22,760 --> 00:40:24,640 - Where you going? - I'm taking Dad home. 639 00:40:27,280 --> 00:40:28,885 What's brought this on? 640 00:40:28,920 --> 00:40:30,969 Mum's dumped him. He can't be on his own. 641 00:40:31,005 --> 00:40:32,154 Shall I come? 642 00:40:35,720 --> 00:40:37,120 Bel, what's going on? 643 00:40:39,320 --> 00:40:43,502 He needs peace and quiet and time to get his head straight... 644 00:40:45,157 --> 00:40:46,517 ..and to see where to go with it. 645 00:40:51,760 --> 00:40:53,320 Everything OK? 646 00:41:03,920 --> 00:41:05,440 Right, then, what's goin' on? 647 00:41:14,592 --> 00:41:15,992 She just sent me this. 648 00:41:20,120 --> 00:41:21,280 Jesus. 649 00:41:22,760 --> 00:41:25,165 - Is it real? - That's what I thought. 650 00:41:25,200 --> 00:41:27,245 Is it something Leanne's done to wind me up? 651 00:41:27,280 --> 00:41:28,765 You know, like Photoshopped? 652 00:41:28,800 --> 00:41:30,293 I think it's real. 653 00:41:31,200 --> 00:41:33,205 I'll murder him. 654 00:41:33,537 --> 00:41:36,577 - Trust me, I could not feel more guilty. - I should hope so. 655 00:41:40,680 --> 00:41:43,085 But also just a little bit chuffed. 656 00:41:43,439 --> 00:41:45,124 She's fit as, right? 657 00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:47,230 Part of you is thinking, "How the hell did I pull that?" 658 00:41:47,266 --> 00:41:48,318 No! 659 00:41:53,240 --> 00:41:55,045 - Yeah, kind of. - Hmm. 660 00:41:55,080 --> 00:41:57,085 Let's just hope you've got away with it. 661 00:41:57,120 --> 00:41:59,085 I would give anything to get away with it. 662 00:41:59,120 --> 00:42:01,885 - And you wouldn't go back there again? - Absolutely not. 663 00:42:01,920 --> 00:42:05,005 I feel bad because I didn't discourage her. 664 00:42:05,040 --> 00:42:08,365 You know, I didn't make clear I was married from the start. 665 00:42:08,400 --> 00:42:11,606 And I am married and I want to stay married. 666 00:42:12,400 --> 00:42:14,309 If I can walk away now... 667 00:42:14,920 --> 00:42:16,565 Can you? 668 00:42:17,200 --> 00:42:19,285 You know what? I've had enough of this salon shit. 669 00:42:19,320 --> 00:42:21,245 I've barely seen Bel in weeks. I'm going to book 670 00:42:21,280 --> 00:42:24,885 us a trip away somewhere special, put the whole thing behind us. 671 00:42:24,920 --> 00:42:27,285 I've got a mate with a hotel on Windermere. Let me call him. 672 00:42:27,320 --> 00:42:29,873 - No, I'll, I'll... - Leave it with me. 673 00:42:36,480 --> 00:42:38,000 Yeah, Raymond? How you doing, mate? 674 00:42:43,600 --> 00:42:44,880 Wesley Finch? 675 00:42:46,040 --> 00:42:49,400 No, sorry, this week's not great. 676 00:42:49,880 --> 00:42:53,300 Yeah, I know, I'm looking to be away for the next fortnight so... 677 00:42:55,000 --> 00:42:58,045 - Can you just hang on a sec? - Week after next for two weeks? 678 00:42:58,080 --> 00:43:00,420 Own veranda, overlooking the lake? 679 00:43:01,280 --> 00:43:02,885 Yeah, all right. 680 00:43:02,920 --> 00:43:04,845 Actually, I could come round now. 681 00:43:05,294 --> 00:43:07,094 - Is five OK? - Yeah. 682 00:43:09,240 --> 00:43:10,685 Just act normal. 683 00:43:10,720 --> 00:43:13,925 - Uh-huh. - Business as usual. 684 00:43:14,548 --> 00:43:16,400 Business as usual. OK. 685 00:43:20,200 --> 00:43:21,588 Hi! 686 00:43:21,880 --> 00:43:23,245 Thanks for coming. 687 00:43:23,280 --> 00:43:24,720 It's just through here. 688 00:43:31,200 --> 00:43:32,632 What? 689 00:43:33,240 --> 00:43:34,360 Why...? 690 00:43:35,920 --> 00:43:37,285 I don't understand. 691 00:43:37,320 --> 00:43:39,080 I'm just nipping out for some milk. 692 00:43:41,360 --> 00:43:43,225 What's happening? 693 00:43:44,920 --> 00:43:47,648 - I have no idea. - Me neither. 694 00:43:49,640 --> 00:43:50,960 Christ. 695 00:43:52,635 --> 00:43:53,995 Are you OK? 696 00:43:55,671 --> 00:43:57,231 Yeah, I'm fine. I'm... 697 00:43:59,320 --> 00:44:01,895 No, I'm not. 698 00:44:02,640 --> 00:44:07,520 I'm confused and appalled and really pissed off. 699 00:44:08,520 --> 00:44:11,045 How could you not tell me you were married? 700 00:44:11,080 --> 00:44:13,805 I would never have gone there. This is not what I do! 701 00:44:13,840 --> 00:44:16,405 It wasn't you, it was my fault. 702 00:44:16,673 --> 00:44:18,481 It was all... It was all my fault. 703 00:44:19,483 --> 00:44:21,003 I just need to get home. 704 00:44:32,720 --> 00:44:35,285 Hi, it's Dante, leave a message. 705 00:44:35,837 --> 00:44:39,725 Dante? What the hell? You better get your arse round here now 706 00:44:39,760 --> 00:44:41,480 or I will never speak to you again. 707 00:44:48,040 --> 00:44:49,502 How long's it been? 708 00:44:50,280 --> 00:44:52,389 30 years. 709 00:44:52,760 --> 00:44:55,051 - Classic. - Is it? 710 00:44:56,880 --> 00:44:59,365 Reach a certain age, take it all for granted. 711 00:44:59,400 --> 00:45:01,285 One day - splat! 712 00:45:01,320 --> 00:45:04,119 Head first through a third-floor window. 713 00:45:05,360 --> 00:45:07,117 End of the day... 714 00:45:08,920 --> 00:45:10,240 ..you survive. 715 00:45:15,320 --> 00:45:18,193 I just don't get why this happened to us. 716 00:45:19,640 --> 00:45:22,013 He's at that age, pushin' 50. 717 00:45:23,111 --> 00:45:27,271 Fellas start looking around, asking questions. 718 00:45:29,040 --> 00:45:30,885 "Who am I?" 719 00:45:30,920 --> 00:45:32,583 "Is this it?" 720 00:45:32,920 --> 00:45:34,405 "What else is out there?" 721 00:45:34,440 --> 00:45:36,925 Kids leave home, gap opens up, you hope the missus'll fill it. 722 00:45:36,960 --> 00:45:39,885 But if she don't, if she's off doin' her own thing... 723 00:45:39,920 --> 00:45:41,080 Is that what I've done? 724 00:45:42,960 --> 00:45:46,521 If I see him now, I'll say things I can't take back. 725 00:45:47,289 --> 00:45:49,169 And if it's just a one-off... 726 00:45:50,280 --> 00:45:51,403 Is it? 727 00:45:51,439 --> 00:45:53,778 Well, if you'd seen his face when he got that text. 728 00:45:55,320 --> 00:45:57,085 These things happen. 729 00:45:57,120 --> 00:45:59,053 Perhaps he was lonely? 730 00:45:59,560 --> 00:46:02,431 - And got caught. - With his kecks down. 731 00:46:02,960 --> 00:46:04,885 You think I should go home? 732 00:46:04,920 --> 00:46:08,236 I think you should go home. 733 00:46:44,519 --> 00:46:46,653 _ 734 00:47:21,000 --> 00:47:23,680 Dante, you absolute arsehole! 735 00:47:28,560 --> 00:47:30,440 I'm sorry, I don't know how to do this. 736 00:47:32,240 --> 00:47:35,160 I presume there's some etiquette. 737 00:47:36,240 --> 00:47:39,165 Which I've never learnt because I've never done this before. 738 00:47:39,200 --> 00:47:41,165 You've never cheated on your wife? 739 00:47:41,200 --> 00:47:42,405 Not in 30 years. 740 00:47:42,440 --> 00:47:43,880 So, why now? 741 00:47:49,200 --> 00:47:51,020 Because you make me feel 18 again. 742 00:48:15,200 --> 00:48:17,485 - I don't know how it happened! - You do know how it happened. 743 00:48:17,520 --> 00:48:19,685 - I don't know how it happened. - You do know how it happened. 744 00:48:19,721 --> 00:48:22,485 Yeah! She's young, fit, funny, smart. 745 00:48:22,520 --> 00:48:25,805 We have this connection, you know? 746 00:48:26,960 --> 00:48:29,040 When I'm with her, she makes me feel like... 747 00:48:30,760 --> 00:48:32,840 ..what have I been missing all these years? 748 00:48:35,000 --> 00:48:38,045 So not to be crude, but the sex is... 749 00:48:38,345 --> 00:48:40,105 Out of this world! 750 00:48:43,800 --> 00:48:45,485 At the end of the day... 751 00:48:45,520 --> 00:48:47,885 you and I both know what it's like waking up 752 00:48:47,920 --> 00:48:50,622 beside the same faces for decades. 753 00:48:53,480 --> 00:48:55,659 Hey, look, pal. 754 00:48:56,480 --> 00:49:00,296 You know I think the world of Bel, but you and I, we go way back. 755 00:49:01,065 --> 00:49:02,845 - I know. - I'm always going see it from your side. 756 00:49:02,881 --> 00:49:04,172 I know that, mate. 757 00:49:12,120 --> 00:49:13,480 Can I let you into a secret? 758 00:49:16,040 --> 00:49:17,520 There's part of me... 759 00:49:18,900 --> 00:49:20,660 ..thinks - should I just go with it? 760 00:49:23,800 --> 00:49:26,565 - As in, get it out of your system? - See if the grass really is greener. 761 00:49:26,600 --> 00:49:29,394 - Which we both know it's not. - Right. 762 00:49:31,960 --> 00:49:35,565 But if you feel you need to test the waters, prove to yourself 763 00:49:35,600 --> 00:49:37,692 there's no place like home. 764 00:49:39,000 --> 00:49:41,320 And Bel never finds out. 765 00:49:44,600 --> 00:49:46,080 No harm done. 766 00:50:02,320 --> 00:50:04,040 I just wanted what's best for you. 767 00:50:05,800 --> 00:50:07,725 How do you know what's best for me? 768 00:50:07,760 --> 00:50:09,925 I know you really like the guy. 769 00:50:09,960 --> 00:50:12,685 I know you've had a string of losers. I know you deserve better. 770 00:50:12,720 --> 00:50:14,528 He is better. 771 00:50:15,440 --> 00:50:18,364 He ticks all the boxes, he's Mr Ideal! 772 00:50:19,739 --> 00:50:22,348 - But he's married. - But he came back. 773 00:50:24,760 --> 00:50:27,645 And, somehow, we fell into bed again. 774 00:50:27,680 --> 00:50:29,085 So he can't keep away. 775 00:50:29,120 --> 00:50:30,885 He's seriously hot. 776 00:50:30,920 --> 00:50:33,182 And you're really into him? 777 00:50:33,218 --> 00:50:34,130 Yeah. 778 00:50:34,166 --> 00:50:36,946 And his marriage is over, or he wouldn't be with you. 779 00:50:39,280 --> 00:50:40,680 How old is his wife? 780 00:50:42,320 --> 00:50:43,805 Late 40s? 781 00:50:43,840 --> 00:50:45,725 Oh, you're doing him a favour. 782 00:50:45,760 --> 00:50:47,000 Seriously! 783 00:50:48,200 --> 00:50:51,017 She'll be saggy, shrivelled, total dog. 784 00:50:51,053 --> 00:50:52,285 You're awful! 785 00:50:52,320 --> 00:50:54,560 Trust me, at that age, all they are is a habit. 786 00:51:29,235 --> 00:51:30,475 Dad? 787 00:52:17,680 --> 00:52:19,845 I hope you're proud of yourselves, letting that go up. 788 00:52:19,880 --> 00:52:21,885 It's a marketing ploy. We all agreed... 789 00:52:21,920 --> 00:52:23,565 It's a personal affront to me! 790 00:52:23,600 --> 00:52:27,205 It suggests that I was useless and she's better. 791 00:52:27,240 --> 00:52:29,005 You... 792 00:52:29,040 --> 00:52:30,485 You don't even look the part. 793 00:52:30,520 --> 00:52:33,045 You could at least respect my legacy and get yourself botoxed, 794 00:52:33,080 --> 00:52:35,325 filled and polished into something presentable. 795 00:52:35,360 --> 00:52:38,125 But no, you're just going to sit back and do nothing. 796 00:52:38,160 --> 00:52:40,560 - Where do you get that idea from? - Loser! 797 00:52:44,560 --> 00:52:46,045 Come on in and give us a try. 798 00:52:46,080 --> 00:52:48,365 New salon, new era! 799 00:52:48,400 --> 00:52:51,445 We've had a face-lift, see what we can do for you. 800 00:52:51,480 --> 00:52:54,725 Transform your appearance, transform your life. 801 00:52:54,760 --> 00:53:01,805 Ladies and gentlemen, I now declare the new MirrorBel Beauty salon open! 802 00:53:04,000 --> 00:53:05,520 Come on! 803 00:53:07,920 --> 00:53:09,405 Happy? 804 00:53:09,440 --> 00:53:10,560 So far. 805 00:53:12,760 --> 00:53:16,285 - And the cookie... - Lorelei? 806 00:53:16,320 --> 00:53:17,885 ..has no idea? 807 00:53:17,920 --> 00:53:19,320 Not a clue. 808 00:53:22,320 --> 00:53:23,560 Keep it up. 809 00:53:27,193 --> 00:53:28,393 I still don't get it. 810 00:53:30,040 --> 00:53:31,485 What don't you get? 811 00:53:31,636 --> 00:53:34,896 Why you want your best mate to cheat on your other best mate. 812 00:53:39,580 --> 00:53:41,140 She's not my best mate. 813 00:53:45,120 --> 00:53:48,000 She's the woman I would've married if he hadn't got there first. 814 00:53:48,960 --> 00:53:50,200 Wow. 815 00:53:52,880 --> 00:53:54,280 Long game. 816 00:53:57,040 --> 00:53:59,160 Timing is everything. 817 00:54:08,120 --> 00:54:11,485 Well done, guys! Great start, eh? 818 00:54:11,520 --> 00:54:13,120 See how long that lasts. 819 00:54:14,680 --> 00:54:16,605 That's fantastic. 820 00:54:16,640 --> 00:54:17,685 Speech! 821 00:54:19,280 --> 00:54:21,160 Get a picture of that, get a picture. 822 00:54:44,680 --> 00:54:46,285 Hello? 823 00:54:46,320 --> 00:54:47,720 Hi. 824 00:54:49,200 --> 00:54:54,485 Yeah. I've never done this before, so I don't exactly know what 825 00:54:54,520 --> 00:54:57,720 I'm letting myself in for, but I'd like to book a taster session. 59463

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