Original subtitles

five, six, seven, eight.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

The competition is close

but we haven't finished all of the routine.

Hello, uh-huh, yes, yes.

Make sure you memorize it and are able to dance it.

Let's really try hard.

No, I'm not thin!

Yes you are!

Stop it. You're thin too.

Ew!

You pulled out too much hair.

What? That makes it smell bad?

Because that widens the pores.

But shaving irritates my skin.

Nobody is looking at your f**king armpits.

What's that about?

Really? Thanks!

Here.

Thank you!

Oh, I'll pass.

Are you on diet?

I didn't know.

No I'm not.

Don't worry about it. Here.

Thanks.

Hey, is your hair different?

Kanae, Satoko, bye-bye!

Bye-bye! Be safe!

She's acting all cute.

You've got a better figure.

I heard the popular height is 158 cm.

I'm too tall.

It makes you look thinner. It's good.

It's all about the face.

How about you, Satoko?

Nothing at all.

I wonder if something is wrong with our feminine hormones.

You're kidding, right?

Wow!

Wow! That's bad. Satoko, that's a man's shoulder.

I'm gonna kill you.

Welcome home.

Dinner will be ready soon.

What is it?

Gratin.

Again?

You like it, don't you?

It's...

Where's my brother? At cram school?

Yes. He'll be home early today.

Keita is really working hard!

I'm going to change.

I'm home!

Welcome home.

Hi.

You made it just in time.

What's for dinner?

Gratin.

Yes!

Gratin.

Gra-gra-tin-tin. Gra-tin-tin!

Gra-gra-tin-tin. Gra-tin-tin!

What on earth are you singing?

Written and performed by me.

Good, right?

Disgusting.

Here, thanks.

Delicious!

So good.

I'm so glad.

Satoko, I'll give you more too.

No.

Just a little bit.

Thanks.

Ew! Disgusting!

Don't drink that!

What is this? It's not juice?

It's shiso herb juice.

What?

That's not juice.

You have to add sugar.

Disgusting!

You can't drink it like that.

Here's some water.

Here, it's sweet.

It's a little too big.

Delicious!

Isn't it good?

Yeah, it's sweet.

They're from Mrs. Yamada. Here, Satoko.

Heeey, I'm home!

Welcome home.

Hey son, are you studying hard?

Men have to study...

Yes, I got it.

I wonder if he really gets it...

I don't understand him.

Can I lie down?

How's school?

How's dance?

I see. Keep it up.

The bath is ready.

Thanks.

Dad's been busy.

Yeah.

I'm so full.

Wasn't it good?

It was a Fuji apple.

Excuse me.

Sorry, Satoko. I couldn't make it.

That's quite ok.

Well...

You can't dance anyway.

Shut up.

You're growing up.

Really?

I see what's going on.

Whaddya mean?

What do you mean?

Whaddya mean?

I guess you are still immature.

You really don't know your students.

Hey shut up.

Keep up with practice.

You never come see us anyway.

When I do, I want you to be there.

The competition is coming up soon.

You all have been practicing hard to win.

So do your best.

I know you work hard.

Excuse me.

Sa. To. Ko...

That's a lotta calories.

Oh, you're home.

Yeah.

I ran into Mrs. Nakano. You know how chatty she is.

Oh, you didn't finish?

Hmm, sorry.

Why? Was it too salty?

No, I just didn't have enough time.

Mrs. Nakano said they just had a grandchild.

Her daughter in-law is visiting her now,

but they aren't getting along.

She just kept talking.

What's wrong?

I hate having a period.

I want to take my uterus out.

You should get a sex change.

I want to quit being a woman.

Can you, Yuko?

Buy the way, I heard Mr. Kimura is getting married.

Yeah, I heard her name is Satoko.

What? Really?

Is that why he calls Satoko by her first name?

That's true! Did you know?

Yeah.

Cheer up.

Why?

Because it's not you.

I don't care.

Mr. Kimura's wife is probably very attractive.

She must be, but I'm not interested in dating a teacher.

What's wrong with Mr. Kimura?

I bet he's very faithful.

But I could never kiss Mr. Kimura. Never. Never. Never.

Yuko, you are the worst.

I'm jealous. I wanna get married.

Lunch time!

I'm starving. I want ice cream.

Look, the baseball team is maintaining the field in this heat.

Sorry, gotta go to the bathroom.

Then, I'll go too.

Umm, ok.

Satoko.

I'm coming.

Sorry, sorry...

So I went back to the locker room, but the lights went off and the door wouldn't open.

It was super scary.

Who are you talking about?

Me, Yuko.

You are like a chirping chick.

Are you listening?

What? Yes.

So you guys should come to the locker room with me.

No.

No way.

You guys are cold.

I'm not going to talk anymore.

The street will be closed for another three weeks.

What a pain.

Do we have any leftovers?

Yes, we do.

She hasn't been eating.

Does she have a cold?

She lost her appetite because of the change in seasons.

Nothing serious, I don't think.

How's Keita?

Preparatory school.

He has a national standardized test at preparatory school this Sunday.

Looks like it'll be difficult.

He better study hard.

Yeah...

It was really fun.

Where did you go?

To the underpass where no one is.

No other people!?

Just the two of you!?

Kanae, why don't you get a boyfriend.

You've never had one, right?

That's horrible.

I never said I haven't.

What? You never told me!

Do tell!

I have secrets too.

You have to tell me.

By the way, are we going to see the fireworks?

I don't care about the fireworks.

Did you kiss him?

Yes.

I shouldn't have asked.

Listen up everyone.

First, the call time for the school festival organizers is 3:50 at the gym.

The ethics officers should meet at the main conference room at 3:50 as well.

Also, make sure to turn in your application for summer course.

Finally, about the change in tomorrow's class schedule...

Satoko.

Your TV show is starting.

You don't like the show anymore?

Do you want to bring you some apples?

Dad is saying we should cut the cheese cake.

I'll be downstairs.

Satoko, wait!

Satoko, wait! Let's go out for dinner since we don't have rehearsal.

Let's go out for dinner since we don't have rehearsal.

Sorry.

Oh...

Are you coming to the rehearsal this weekend?

Outdoor, right?

At the park. Meet you at the station 20 minutes before?

Yeah.

Hey, Satoko.

Did you lose weight?

What?

You lost a lot of weight.

Everyone is saying you look cuter.

Really?

Just kidding! Bye!

I'll call you when I get to the station.

If you get there before I do...

Yes...

Satoko, where are you? Are you already there?

I'm running late.

Can you wait for me at the convenience store?

Are you listening?

Sorry. I can't come.

What? Satoko? Are you OK?

Sorry. I'm sorry...

Good morning.

Eat your breakfast.

I have to go now.

Will you be home late today?

Are you feeling better?

Keita is busy with his exams.

I'm fine.

You should hurry, or you'll be late.

Leave the key in the usual spot.

Serve yourself some rice and soup.

Ok, I've got to go.

See ya.

Stop.

Stop me.

Someone.

Why are you wearing those pajamas?

I'm cold.

Do you sleep with the covers on?

I bet you kick off your bedding while sleep.

Is there something you want to eat?

Something I want to eat?

Yeah, something you like.

I'm going grocery shopping tomorrow.

I don't care.

You don't care?

Hey!

How come the bath is so hot? It's like boiling water!

What? But Satoko was just...

I didn't know you'd all be home so early.

Dad brought home some fish from your favorite shop.

Thanks.

Keita, let's eat.

Bon appetit.

Is she their daughter?

Or he's their son?

I don't think they had a son.

Then is he the son-in-law?

Do they have kids?

Don't they have a child the same age as Keita?

Yeah, a boy, his name is Mimu.

So he is taking over the business?

I don't really know.

What does he do?

I think he's in college.

Satoko.

What?

Did you just throw up?

Tell me, you are fine.

What do you mean I'm fine?

Keita said...

When I came home late from preparatory school,

I often see drunk men puking at the station.

Satoko, you smell like them.

Also, you haven't been eating well?

Are you on diet?

Satoko, you just don't have an appetite, right?

And you have been taking a boiling hot baths.

Do you enjoy eating?

You aren't taking any drugs, are you?

What? No.

Beauty is only skin deep. You will see that when you grow up.

Do you want me to grow up?

I'm just worried.

I know that.

Then what is it?

What?

I don't know.

Why didn't you ask us for help?

We're your family.

Family?

Satoko, you don't trust us?

Why do you ever say that?

I'm sorry.

It's all my fault.

Satoko, there's nothing to worry about.

I'm here for you.

Satoko, don't worry, mom will go with you.

Huh?

I don't think you need to see a doctor.

You'll be fine with our support.

Just see a doctor.

But, that's not...

It's about your health.

She's just not well nourished.

Don't be so irresponsible.

You're exaggerating.

She's just got a small appetite.

I know her best.

What would you like to eat, Satoko?

I'm sorry. I...

I never wanted to hurt anyone.

But you always cry first.

Every time, you act like you are the victim.

You say we are family? Disgusting!

Stop it!

Your mom cares about you.

I didn't ask her to cry.

Do you want me to thank you?

Thank you for raising me?

You want me to appreciate you, but that's just your ego.

It's my decision to ask you for help or not.

Your concerns and disappointments are for your own satisfaction.

Your family is just for your own ego.

I know I'm selfish...

while it may have been your responsibility to give birth,

my life isn't yours.

What

What

What did you expect of me?

I'm sorry.

Satoko! You haven't been to school and you're not answering my calls. Are you OK?

Kanae.

Ha? What's up?

Kanae...please...

What?

Help me.

Come on in.

Thank you.

Be careful. The door's heavy.

My mom won't be home until late, so make yourself at home.

Kanae, I'm sorry.

No worries. You asked me for help.

Did you tell your mom you'll be staying here?

Yes.

Good.

Oh, that's just a decoration, a portrait of my late father.

I'm home.

Hi mom.

Hi Satoko. Welcome to our home.

Thank you for having me.

Did you two already have dinner?

Yeah.

What is this, Kanae?

Why can't you wash your dishes?

Ah, I can't.

Oh, I'll do that.

No, no, not you Satoko.

That's right. You relax, Satoko.

Sorry.

Why didn't you wash them right away?

Because it's too much work.

I wish I had a hard working daughter like Satoko.

Too bad, things didn't go the way you wanted.

What a mistake.

You should go back into my womb.

No way.

By the way, we got some sweets from Satoko's mother.

Thank you.

Hey, you're using too much soap.

What do I know? I'm no pro.

Me neither.

I can beat you at the video game.

10 years too soon.

In 10 years, you'll be dead.

Can you not kill me?

I'll hang your portrait next to dad's.

Is it too cold to sleep?

Not at all.

It must be difficult to sleep when you're not in your own bed.

Satoko, make yourself at home.

Thank you very much.

Most days, Kanae is home alone

because I'm busy at work, but she never complains.

Isn't she sweet?

Stay as long as you want.

What's wrong?

It gets sore sometimes. Not a big deal.

Sorry.

I know you're tired.

Nah, I wanted to smoke.

This is my medication.

But Kanae doesn't like it.

Would you like some hot tea?

Where was today's rehearsal?

At the gym.

Ah! Forgot my sportswear.

What? Rice balls?

Here, this one is for you.

Thanks.

Tell that to mom.

Right.

Sorry, I have a date.

I don't care.

Us singles get to hang out and bad-mouth those with boyfriends.

What are you guys gonna do?

OK! I won't join you even if we break up.

Kanae, you'll be busy with your studies, won't you?

Agh!

You've decide to major in science, right?

Yeah.

A science chick, it'll look good on you.

But what about me?

I want to stay in high school for the rent of my life.

Is that true?

Don't take it seriously.

I mean, Kanae...

Ah, that's right. You were absent last week.

How about you Satoko?

I don't know...

They say do what you want, but that's not easy.

Ah!

See-ya!

Bye!

Let's go home.

Yeah.

Sorry about today.

For what?

Because I'm coming home with you.

Satoko...

What?

Well,

my home isn't school,

so I can't act like how I am at school.

I know.

Thank you.

She was there for the morning practice.

Try texting her.

She's not responding.

Kanae doesn't know either.

She lost more weight.

I think she's fine.

I saw her eating lunch the other day.

I'm jealous.

I want to lose weight.

You sure do.

A hankie?

Ask Yuko.

No way.

Hey.

Let's race.

Go!

Satoko, I'm going to school.

No, don't get up.

But you should take a bath today, or at least change your clothes.

Sorry...

Don't worry.

Thanks.

But,

I'm sorry.

Satoko was absent again.

Yeah.

Yuko, how's your boyfriend?

We might break up.

What? For real?

We fight a lot and his fashion sense sucks.

Look at this.

What a f**k ?

It is f**king terrible.

So bad it's almost good.

Take a look, Kanae!

Where does he get these?

That's great.

LIMITED EDITION ROLLED CAKE

You want some?

Yeah.

Go ahead.

They're good.

That's it for today.

Thanks...

Sorry, I couldn't stop eating the cookies.

Satoko, can I come in?

Are you asleep?

Sure.

Are you cold?

Not at all.

That's a great issue.

but the 9th issue hasn't come out.

I heard the artist is in a slump.

I didn't know that.

The bath is ready. Go ahead.

Thanks, I will.

I can't take this anymore.

TO KANAE, NEW YEAR MONEY

Satoko!

I got it. I'm going to the hospital.

Welcome home.

Good morning, Satoko.

Did you sleep?

I have some hot soup.

WAYS TO CURE DEPRESSION: EXAMPLES OF EATING DISORDERS

What's this?

You think you can understand me by reading these?

No, that's for me to study.

Satoko, you said you wanted to get better.

Some days, I can't be at my best.

I'm tired. Sorry.

I'm...

Am I OK?

Please select the floor.

Please select the floor.

Huh?

Ah! Still on lunch break. Shit he is still on a lunch break.

The doctor here takes long lunches, doesn't he?

Does he?

First time?

Do you want to sit down?

Are you in high school?

I'm 17.

So young!

School's off today?

Yes, I'm...

Do you work in an office?

You can say that, but more like a night office.

What's on your mind?

Must be complicated. Sorry.

I'm not here for counseling. I just need prescription for herbal medicine.

I see.

Do you have siblings?

I have a father, mother and older brother.

You have a brother. That's cool.

You don't have any siblings?

Yes, I have a younger sister.

We're only a year apart, so we're kind of like twins.

My sister, my mom, and I still go out sometimes.

I live with mom, and I don't have a boyfriend now,

so we've been going out together a lot.

Ah, sorry. I keep talking about myself.

You love your family.

Yeah.

What kind of family do you have?

My family is just an ordinary family.

Ordinary?

Ordinary.

Ordinary?

Still raining.

But when it's sunny, it can be too hot.

I agree.

I like when the sun peeks out during bad weather.

I eat and throw up.

I know it's stupid.

It's disgusting.

I'm the worst.

But

when I'm doing it,

I feel like I'm retaliating.

I can't eat mom's cooking.

But I want to eat,

but

I have to throw up.

I can't resist it.

I have

family

and friends.

I have everything I need.

It's nobody's fault.

but

I feel like I have nothing.

I want it so bad,

but I don't even know what I want.

I can't understand it.

I'm so confused.

But

I'm scared of people finding out how confused I am.

So

when I'm invisible, I can relax.

So

I don't even know what to do.

What a luxury.

I know there are people who are less fortunate.

Less fortunate?

Like children in Africa.

People who are struggling to stay alive.

I'm just spoiled.

I have family and friends.

Luxurious and selfish.

I know that but I can't look at others.

I pretend to be a victim and being lazy.

I don't want to hurt anyone.

I'm really sorry.

I should...

Your feelings are real.

It's impossible not to feel, right?

But...

You never gave up trying to like yourself.

I'm sorry.

Everyone is doing their best,

but I can't.

Everyone is simply living their lives.

I hope you can be who you want to be.

who I want to be?

As long as you are satisfied.

Even if I'm crazy?

Of course.

Even if I'm no good?

That's fine. You have to start somewhere.

Nobody has ever said that to me.

You should have had more stupid people like me around.

What...

What's your name?

Maki.

Maki.

Yes.

What's yours?

It's Satoko.

Satoko-chan.

Yes.

How about a limited time offer?

I'm super weak.

I feel like I have to eat it now

and won't be able to take my mind off it until it feels like my head will explode.

Well that's serious!

How about McDonald's?

I can handle it.

How about Go-Go Curry?

I can handle it.

Then, Tully's?

I can't handle it.

Oh, really?

I love junk food, so I love McDonald's.

I have a thing for green signs.

Green signs?

You know, lots of natural food stores and cafes, with their chalkboard signs out front.

I see, you like healthy foods.

Funny that you like the green signs.

I'd throw up anyway. Doesn't matter how healthy it is.

I desperately hoard food, like some kind of animal.

What? Animal? Aren't you an animal? Am I wrong?

Well...

It's like you're going to hibernate.

Is it funny?

Yes, it's funny.

I'm weirder than an animal.

When it comes to something else, I'm sluggish,

but when I'm hungry, that's all I can think about.

Sato-chan, your obsession is quite interesting.

Obsession?

I sound stupid, don't I?

I don't quite understand it, but I think it's ok not to be understood.

You are interesting.

I got hairy.

What? Where?

My whole body.

Why?

I don't know, but I got hairy.

Fascinating!

You body is struggling to live!

Am I really going to hibernation?

"Good morning Satoko! Maki."

Good morning.

May be the strawberry, right?

That'll be good.

But I want mochi too.

I'll take your order.

What can you recommend?

Huh? Well, the strawberry is popular.

I'm not after what's popular.

Ok, I want the strawberry,

but can you add green tea and mochi to it?

Oh, and chocolate too!

Well, I'm sorry but that's not on the menu.

What? What If I pay for two?

I can't give up.

Sato-chan, what should I do?

What? I don't know...

Fine. Separate them. I'll take two.

Yes. So a strawberry crepe and green tea mochi crepe?

Please grill them a little longer. I like them crispy.

Ok.

Maki, can you eat all that?

One strawberry and one mochi.

Your total for the two crepes is...

I changed my mind. Just drinks please.

Delicious!

That's good.

This will look great on you. Sato-chan, you're so cute.

No, that's too daring.

Daring?

I like more modest stuff.

Modest?

What? You wouldn't wear this?

This pretty color would look so good on you.

I wouldn't wear it.

"I wouldn't wear it."

You're cute.

You want things just so.

Just so...

Sato-chan, you like things

the way you like them, right?

Here, very cute.

No, I didn't say I want something more daring.

Daring?

Daring? This is just pajamas.

Wouldn't you wear them?

By the way, I think your hat is cute.

You think so?

Where did you get it?

Just at a supply store.

Really, I want to go there.

Can you take me there? I want to buy one.

You like something like this?

What do you mean something like this?

I want it. Take me!

Maki, what do you think about taking a little break?

What?

I want to wear that hat.

Ok, let's go.

Maki, do you cook?

No, not at all.

Oh, wow, my mom would like this.

What is it? That's cool! Maybe I should buy one too?

For your mom?

I don't have parents.

Oh... then for your sister?

I'm an only child, so I eat out most of the time.

But this might change things!

Wishful thinking?

That store clerk asked if we were sisters.

Are you kidding? I wonder which one of us he thought was older.

I wonder.

Maki, you never really ask about my family.

If you want to talk about them, I'll listen!

But I don't really care.

I'm just out having a good time with you.

Sato-chan.

Yes.

You know, we see each other when we feel like it,

and talk about what we want to.

It's carefree and I like it.

I think so too.

It's nice and chill today.

It is nice.

That's weird...

That was a cat, right?

Yes! Wasn't it cute? Like so ugly it's cute.

But you know, men are a little anxious.

It's my job, you know, but he says what I do ain't really a job.

So you know, we fought this morning, but I had to go to work,

so I told him I'm leaving, but he told me to leave then.

So you know, I left, but later he showed up at my work

and started to pick a fight with my customer.

It was a mess.

I've been living with for a wife, and he loves my cooking and all,

Satchi, are you listening?

Yes.

I'm listening.

Where are you going?

Be careful out there.

What kind of monster is that?

An ogre?

Scary, isn't it?

Do you think monsters can be scared of themselves?

When they look into mirrors? That'd be really funny.

I mean, if they look like that.

Maybe being scary is a good thing in the world of monsters.

Why?

Or maybe they prefer to be powerful?

Do you think there are monsters who do not want to be scary?

That... I wouldn't like that.

If a guy is handsome,

he can't blame it on how he looks if someone breaks his heart.

Never mind,

he looks like having fun.

I see.

She's pigging out.

Look at the amount of food she has.

That's way too much, right?

Satoko, I hate yam cake.

Do you want it?

It's OK if you don't.

You're not gonna eat this?

Maki...

Yeees?

Are you enjoying them?

They're delicious.

Instead of yam cake,

can I have a bite of this?

Can you eat?

I want to.

Aren't you scared?

As long as you don't mind.

Not at all.

It's OK.

It's delicious.

Mom, you bought new shoes.

That's right.

I saw them a week ago, and couldn't forget about them

so I finally bought them.

Oh, I bet dad's going to be late.

How do you know?

I just know.

Who proposed to who, you or dad?

It wasn't like that. We met through a matchmaker.

I thought you fell in love.

No it was arranged before we even met.

But you liked him.

Actually,

I didn't.

I had a boyfriend.

I was with him since college.

I loved him but he was poor.

So your grandma broke us up.

Do you hate her for it?

Yeah,

she wasn't even a good caregiver, but she had a quick temper.

I always thought I didn't want to become a mom like her.

But I'm not doing a very good job, am I?

But you're doing your best, right?

I wanted to.

I guess you're only human.

Huh? Who did you think I was.

I don't know.

You're my mom.

Here.

Sorry.

No, it's my fault. I'm the one who wanted to come here.

Come on.

Welcome home.

Thanks.

Here, Keita.

What is this?

A good luck charm for your exam.

We went to pay for you.

It might just ease your mind.

I guess, but I'd rather eat gratin.

I hate gratin.

What's there to hate about gratin?

I love gratin.

Can you say why you hate it?

Huh?

I love it.

I love it.

Can you say why you hate it?

See you can't.

I win.

It's grain tonight.

No.

Gratin?

No.

I think we have to fight for it.

Come on.

Have you been sleeping better?

Yes.

No need to rush.

Have you noticed any differences?

I counted

all the things

that I didn't have

or lost...

I worry about quitting the dance team

and all the regrets I have.

Yes.

But recently,

I realized that I haven't counted the things

that are still there for me

and things that I gained.

I see. What do you think? Should we cut back on the medicine a little?

Sato-chan.

I heard you're medication has been cut back.

Oh, I'm sorry for being late. I fell asleep while taking a bath.

I did wake up early though. I don't know why.

I guess because it was so comfortable.

I guess it was natural instinct to go home, you know?

I made it home. Don't you think that's incredible?

Anyway, he's the son of a fisherman,

so he gobbled up the fish I cooked.

I guess he's use to it, but he sure surprised me.

Maki,

shall we go home?

Why? What's the problem? I'm going super fine!

Please don't push yourself too hard.

What? Anyways, you know how hard it is to eat fish.

I mean, I like it and I've been eating fish all my life,

but I don't know why it gets so messy when I eat it.

I always surprise myself.

But he ate it so neatly.

Maki, I'm sorry, but...

You want to go home?

Yes, I...

No worries. Can't relax, right?

You want to walk away from here as soon as possible, don't you?

Maki, I don't want to pressure you.

You don't have to make me a priority.

What? What do you mean? It's no problem. I'm totally fine!

I'm sorry.

Did I remind you of something you're worried about?

I'm worried.

I see. That's ok.

I'll pay for these.

Run, Sato-chan, as far as you wish.

Go! Get up!

Get up!

Run!

It's not like that.

That's ok. See, I'm fine. Run!

Maki, I don't want you to disappear.

It's not like I'm leaving you behind.

What happened to you, Sato-chan.

Don't worry about me. It's ok if you want to run.

Sato-chan, run, go!

I don't want you to try hard,

but I don't want you to stop give up, in either of me.

"Maki, it's cold today." "Good night, Maki." "Good morning, Maki."

Satoko!

Yes!

Yes.

"Maki, write me when you feel like it."

SOUTHERN CREPE

Maki!

Maki!

I don't want anything from you.

You can be anybody,

however,

wherever,

I just

want you

to be alive.

Even if you're not ok,

if everything is awful.

It's ok.

I hope the skies clear up tomorrow.