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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:08,160
We're back with,
uh, Vince Vaughn.
2
00:00:08,179 --> 00:00:10,089
We were just talking
before the commercial break
3
00:00:10,109 --> 00:00:14,169
about, uh, your upcoming movie
and, uh, what you play in it.
4
00:00:14,189 --> 00:00:15,279
It's called
"Clay Pigeons," is it?
5
00:00:16,000 --> 00:00:17,160
Yeah, it's called
"Clay Pigeons," and I play
6
00:00:17,179 --> 00:00:19,269
a character named Lester Long,
who's sort of a drifter.
7
00:00:19,289 --> 00:00:21,089
You do a lot
of independent--
8
00:00:21,109 --> 00:00:23,209
small, independent movies,
and I-- I salute you.
9
00:00:23,230 --> 00:00:25,140
It's-- you make
really good choices.
10
00:00:25,160 --> 00:00:26,150
Well, I appreciate it.
11
00:00:26,170 --> 00:00:27,240
And great to have you here
12
00:00:27,260 --> 00:00:30,010
towards the end here
on our last few weeks.
13
00:00:30,030 --> 00:00:31,220
I really appreciate it,
Appreciate you
coming by.
14
00:00:31,239 --> 00:00:34,139
especially with your show
winding down. It must be
an interesting time for you.
15
00:00:34,159 --> 00:00:36,179
So, thanks for having me
and, uh, you know,
16
00:00:36,200 --> 00:00:39,120
good luck to you in the future.
Must have a lot of opportunities
after this.
17
00:00:39,140 --> 00:00:41,080
Well, I do have a lot
of opportunities. I...
18
00:00:41,100 --> 00:00:42,210
Wow.
19
00:00:42,229 --> 00:00:44,039
Party's over, huh?
20
00:00:45,149 --> 00:00:48,039
Must have nothing going on now
as they say, huh, Hank?
21
00:00:48,060 --> 00:00:50,040
Well, it's not
nothing going on.
22
00:00:50,060 --> 00:00:52,100
I got a couple, uh,
irons in the fire.
Really?
23
00:00:52,119 --> 00:00:53,179
Hank: Well, I mean nothing--
24
00:00:53,200 --> 00:00:57,020
I mean, what kind of irons
do you possibly have going on?
25
00:00:57,039 --> 00:00:59,089
Well, nothing big. I mean,
nothing like, you know,
26
00:00:59,109 --> 00:01:03,019
your career-- the blurry,
out of focus, independent film.
27
00:01:03,039 --> 00:01:04,259
Right, right, right.
28
00:01:04,280 --> 00:01:07,170
Which blurry, independent film
are you talking about?
29
00:01:07,189 --> 00:01:10,169
Are you talking about
"The Lost World: Jurassic Park,"
30
00:01:10,189 --> 00:01:13,019
which was one of the highest
grossing films in history?
31
00:01:13,039 --> 00:01:15,099
Larry: Yeah. That's right.
32
00:01:15,120 --> 00:01:17,150
Well, it was--
it was, uh, gross all right.
33
00:01:17,170 --> 00:01:20,140
What did they do at--
when they called you
to their-- places?
34
00:01:20,159 --> 00:01:23,189
Did they-- they say, uh, uh,
"Mr. Vaughn and--
35
00:01:23,210 --> 00:01:25,240
and the-- the rest
of you dinosaurs"?
36
00:01:25,260 --> 00:01:27,120
(laughter)
37
00:01:27,140 --> 00:01:28,270
Why don't we take a break?
38
00:01:28,289 --> 00:01:30,039
I can tell you--
Vince: Okay. Yeah.
39
00:01:30,060 --> 00:01:31,060
I can tell you this:
40
00:01:31,079 --> 00:01:33,119
Hank doesn't even
have a fire, let alone irons.
41
00:01:33,140 --> 00:01:34,180
(laughter)
42
00:01:34,200 --> 00:01:37,000
We'll be right back.
No flipping.
43
00:01:37,020 --> 00:01:38,100
(applause)
44
00:01:38,120 --> 00:01:40,140
That was funny.
That was good.
45
00:01:40,159 --> 00:01:41,239
That was a very funny
run, you guys.
46
00:01:41,259 --> 00:01:43,289
Hey, man, so you know, I just,
uh, was playing with you.
47
00:01:44,009 --> 00:01:47,129
Nothing personal.
Hey, man, would you
take it personally
48
00:01:47,150 --> 00:01:49,270
if I told you that
you were nothing but the, uh,
49
00:01:49,289 --> 00:01:51,999
flavor of the month?
50
00:01:52,020 --> 00:01:53,120
Are you for real?
51
00:01:53,140 --> 00:01:54,130
Because you are.
52
00:01:54,150 --> 00:01:56,290
And next month is gonna
be another flavor.
53
00:01:57,009 --> 00:01:58,059
Jerk.
54
00:01:58,079 --> 00:01:59,249
Fucking asshole.
55
00:01:59,270 --> 00:02:02,070
Bitter fucking asshole.
56
00:02:02,090 --> 00:02:05,200
Oh! Beverly, uh, I want
you to take my car
57
00:02:05,219 --> 00:02:07,259
to Premier Auto Detailers
tomorrow.
58
00:02:07,280 --> 00:02:10,220
And don't let that toothless
Ukrainian guy near it.
59
00:02:10,240 --> 00:02:13,170
Only give the keys
to Caro. To Caro!
60
00:02:13,189 --> 00:02:15,189
And don't forget
to tip him two bucks!
61
00:02:15,210 --> 00:02:18,080
Uh, Hank, when does
Brian get back?
62
00:02:18,099 --> 00:02:20,099
Oh, who knows how long
these gay cruises last?
63
00:02:20,120 --> 00:02:23,010
They're in international waters.
They can do anything.
64
00:02:24,020 --> 00:02:25,270
Mary Lou:
Beverly?
65
00:02:28,050 --> 00:02:30,170
Oh, my gosh,
what's wrong?
66
00:02:30,189 --> 00:02:32,289
I just hit Hank's car.
Oh.
67
00:02:35,099 --> 00:02:36,999
When?
Just now!
68
00:02:37,020 --> 00:02:40,040
You're not parked
anywhere near Hank's car.
You're in another lot.
69
00:02:40,060 --> 00:02:42,280
I know. I'm such a bad driver.
Well, what happened?
70
00:02:43,000 --> 00:02:44,220
I was coming over here
to pick up some stuff
71
00:02:44,240 --> 00:02:46,040
and I ran
into the back of his car.
72
00:02:46,060 --> 00:02:48,000
It's like I was drunk.
Well, are you?
73
00:02:48,020 --> 00:02:51,100
Now?
Well, which car did you hit?
74
00:02:51,120 --> 00:02:54,000
I don't know.
It was really big and foreign,
75
00:02:54,020 --> 00:02:55,230
kind of like a big boat.
Oh, god.
76
00:02:55,250 --> 00:02:57,060
Oh.
77
00:02:58,199 --> 00:03:00,179
You hit his Bentley.
78
00:03:00,199 --> 00:03:02,049
Oh.
Is that bad?
79
00:03:03,189 --> 00:03:05,289
Oi.
It's really bad, right?
80
00:03:07,090 --> 00:03:08,130
(knock on door)
81
00:03:08,150 --> 00:03:09,290
Hey, Artie?
Norman!
82
00:03:10,009 --> 00:03:12,099
I thought I smelled hype
in the air.
What, too heavy?
83
00:03:12,120 --> 00:03:14,140
No, not for the prince of PR.
84
00:03:14,159 --> 00:03:15,209
Where's Larry?
85
00:03:15,229 --> 00:03:17,209
I would calculate
at this very moment,
86
00:03:17,229 --> 00:03:20,019
he's at Sunset
and Beverly Glen.
87
00:03:20,039 --> 00:03:22,069
Oh, damn. I wanted to run
an idea by you guys
88
00:03:22,090 --> 00:03:24,030
for the interview
we're doing for "Extra."
89
00:03:24,050 --> 00:03:25,100
Go ahead.
Okay.
90
00:03:25,120 --> 00:03:27,180
Larry Sanders poolside.
91
00:03:27,199 --> 00:03:30,039
You know, legend in repose.
92
00:03:30,060 --> 00:03:32,120
Sunlight makes
the legend squint.
93
00:03:32,139 --> 00:03:33,159
Okay, how about
94
00:03:33,180 --> 00:03:36,140
on a veranda
sipping iced tea?
95
00:03:36,159 --> 00:03:38,999
You know, Larry at leisure.
96
00:03:39,020 --> 00:03:40,170
How about in the living room
on the couch?
97
00:03:40,189 --> 00:03:43,169
You know, Larry
in the living room
on the couch.
98
00:03:43,189 --> 00:03:44,179
That's good too.
99
00:03:44,199 --> 00:03:46,069
Did you get the topics
from Momo yet?
100
00:03:46,090 --> 00:03:47,140
"Momo"?
101
00:03:47,159 --> 00:03:49,119
Maureen O'Boyle.
102
00:03:49,139 --> 00:03:50,999
We go way back.
103
00:03:51,020 --> 00:03:53,010
Please, don't ask.
104
00:03:53,030 --> 00:03:54,170
Please, don't tell.
105
00:03:56,120 --> 00:03:57,280
We were lovers in '88
106
00:03:58,000 --> 00:03:59,130
and again in '92.
107
00:03:59,150 --> 00:04:00,250
Really?
108
00:04:00,270 --> 00:04:02,190
What was--
what was that like?
109
00:04:02,210 --> 00:04:05,180
Oh, Norman.
Please, don't pry.
110
00:04:07,110 --> 00:04:09,270
It was hot. Very hot.
111
00:04:09,289 --> 00:04:11,179
What am I gonna do?
I don't know what to do!
112
00:04:11,199 --> 00:04:13,009
No, I'll tell you
what you're gonna do.
113
00:04:13,030 --> 00:04:16,090
You're gonna tell him.
That's all you're gonna do.
But--
114
00:04:17,189 --> 00:04:18,199
(calmly)
Say, Beverly?
115
00:04:20,060 --> 00:04:23,290
My rear left quarter panel
is jammed against my tire,
116
00:04:24,009 --> 00:04:27,019
so I can't drive my car.
117
00:04:27,040 --> 00:04:30,070
Oh, this really
messes up everything,
118
00:04:30,089 --> 00:04:34,019
because I can't go
to the Habitat
119
00:04:34,040 --> 00:04:36,230
(shouting)
for fucking Humanity banquet
120
00:04:36,250 --> 00:04:40,000
in a dented Bentley,
because some shit-bag
121
00:04:40,019 --> 00:04:42,249
smashed into my fucking car!
122
00:04:43,259 --> 00:04:47,059
Oh... my gosh!
Who did this?
123
00:04:51,100 --> 00:04:52,160
Wait a second.
124
00:04:55,040 --> 00:04:56,250
Wait a second here.
125
00:04:56,269 --> 00:04:59,059
I know who it was.
126
00:04:59,079 --> 00:05:01,069
It was...
Hank, I--
127
00:05:01,089 --> 00:05:03,209
Vince fucking Vaughn!
128
00:05:03,230 --> 00:05:06,170
Hank, I--
Vince fucking Vaughn!
129
00:05:07,269 --> 00:05:09,999
Beverly...
130
00:05:10,019 --> 00:05:13,129
would you get Vince Vaughn's
home address for me?
131
00:05:13,149 --> 00:05:15,009
Why?
132
00:05:15,029 --> 00:05:16,249
(whispers)
I don't know.
133
00:05:19,209 --> 00:05:20,209
Uh...
134
00:05:21,209 --> 00:05:23,119
I'm just gonna
let him cool down.
135
00:05:23,139 --> 00:05:25,259
Hank:
Fucker! Fucker!
136
00:05:25,279 --> 00:05:27,109
Look, it's only gonna
get worse.
137
00:05:27,129 --> 00:05:29,999
He thinks Vince Vaughn did it.
You need to tell him now.
Could--
138
00:05:30,019 --> 00:05:31,039
couldn't I just
leave him a note?
139
00:05:31,060 --> 00:05:33,210
You go in there
and tell him now.
140
00:05:33,230 --> 00:05:36,150
V-A-U-G-H-N.
141
00:05:37,290 --> 00:05:40,060
Uh, my guess
would be West Hollywood.
142
00:05:41,149 --> 00:05:42,159
(chuckles)
143
00:05:42,180 --> 00:05:43,260
Unlisted.
144
00:05:43,279 --> 00:05:45,279
Like anyone gives a shit.
(knock on door)
145
00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:47,220
Well, come in!
146
00:05:50,269 --> 00:05:53,009
I'm very sorry
about what happened
to your car.
147
00:05:54,079 --> 00:05:56,189
You know, I--
I get into a lot of accidents.
148
00:05:56,209 --> 00:05:58,129
Like, I don't know why.
I just do.
149
00:05:58,149 --> 00:06:00,079
Have five or six a year.
150
00:06:01,079 --> 00:06:02,069
Um...
151
00:06:02,089 --> 00:06:03,159
Or seven.
152
00:06:03,180 --> 00:06:05,210
Sometimes I get in--
it was seven this year.
153
00:06:05,230 --> 00:06:07,250
Wait, wait, wait, wait, let--
let me understand something.
154
00:06:08,259 --> 00:06:12,039
You get in five or six
accidents a year,
155
00:06:12,060 --> 00:06:13,290
and-- and your car is a...
156
00:06:14,290 --> 00:06:16,250
Um... it's a Jetta.
157
00:06:16,269 --> 00:06:17,289
I'm-- I'm sorry, what?
158
00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:22,260
It's an '85 Jetta.
It's an '85 Jetta.
159
00:06:22,279 --> 00:06:26,139
And you are asking
me to equate that
160
00:06:26,160 --> 00:06:31,030
with a $200,000
handcrafted Bentley?
161
00:06:31,050 --> 00:06:32,210
Is that what you're saying?
162
00:06:32,230 --> 00:06:36,270
No, I don't think so.
I don't-- I don't understand
what you're saying.
163
00:06:36,290 --> 00:06:40,080
Well, I-- I think
what I'm trying to say...
164
00:06:40,100 --> 00:06:41,140
Yes?
165
00:06:45,090 --> 00:06:46,090
Please.
166
00:06:47,250 --> 00:06:49,260
...is how great
I thought you were
167
00:06:49,279 --> 00:06:51,999
on the "Sha-bahd" Telethon
this year.
168
00:06:53,060 --> 00:06:55,110
Oh. Thanks.
169
00:06:55,129 --> 00:06:56,289
Though, it's, uh,
Chabad.
170
00:06:57,009 --> 00:06:59,119
Oh, Chabad. Of course.
Okay.
171
00:06:59,139 --> 00:07:00,269
It was great.
Well, thank you.
172
00:07:00,290 --> 00:07:02,130
You're welcome.
Let me tell you something,
173
00:07:02,149 --> 00:07:05,119
no one really knows
how hard Chabad is.
174
00:07:05,139 --> 00:07:07,159
I mean 10 minutes
of dancing that hora,
175
00:07:07,180 --> 00:07:09,210
you-- that's a fucking marathon.
176
00:07:09,230 --> 00:07:11,060
Oh, I'll bet.
177
00:07:11,079 --> 00:07:12,279
Well, you're in great shape.
178
00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:15,030
That's probably why.
179
00:07:15,050 --> 00:07:16,080
From all that dancing.
180
00:07:16,100 --> 00:07:17,140
Thanks.
181
00:07:17,160 --> 00:07:18,200
Keep it up.
182
00:07:20,009 --> 00:07:21,259
Did you tell him?
183
00:07:21,279 --> 00:07:23,249
Oh! (scoffs) Oh!
184
00:07:29,009 --> 00:07:32,019
Uh, yes. Uh, Vaughn.
Vincent Vaughn.
185
00:07:32,040 --> 00:07:35,000
V-A-U-G-H-N.
186
00:07:35,019 --> 00:07:38,049
I don't know,
try the fucking Valley!
187
00:07:38,069 --> 00:07:40,239
Larry, you almost ready?
Just about.
188
00:07:40,259 --> 00:07:43,109
Good.
One more coat of makeup
and I'll be, uh,
189
00:07:43,129 --> 00:07:45,069
ready for the winter.
Thanks a lot.
190
00:07:45,090 --> 00:07:46,230
That's the good thing
about retiring.
191
00:07:46,250 --> 00:07:48,130
You won't have to
wear makeup every day.
192
00:07:48,149 --> 00:07:50,159
Well, you know,
I enjoy the makeup.
193
00:07:50,180 --> 00:07:53,130
I'm actually wearing
a Number 40 Emotional Block
right now.
194
00:07:53,149 --> 00:07:56,199
Oh, I already sense
the magical chemistry
195
00:07:56,220 --> 00:07:57,230
in this room.
Oh, Arthur,
196
00:07:57,250 --> 00:07:59,190
my goodness,
you look wonderful.
197
00:07:59,209 --> 00:08:01,149
It's your reflection
in my eyes.
Oh,
198
00:08:01,170 --> 00:08:02,200
so sweet.
199
00:08:02,220 --> 00:08:04,250
How are you?
It's been a long time.
Maybe we can
200
00:08:04,269 --> 00:08:06,089
catch up
for dinner tonight.
201
00:08:06,110 --> 00:08:08,040
Good idea.
I'd love that.
202
00:08:08,060 --> 00:08:09,260
Uh, Artie, this is Maureen.
203
00:08:09,279 --> 00:08:11,109
Maureen, Artie.
204
00:08:17,199 --> 00:08:18,279
Never mind.
205
00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:22,000
Anyway, I'm set to go
whenever you are.
Good.
206
00:08:22,019 --> 00:08:23,119
We're just about ready.
This is what--
207
00:08:23,139 --> 00:08:25,089
this is what I'm like.
Sorry if it's disappointing.
208
00:08:25,110 --> 00:08:26,240
(chuckles)
209
00:08:26,259 --> 00:08:29,059
Just have a conversation
with me. Just...
210
00:08:29,079 --> 00:08:30,079
keep focused on me
211
00:08:30,100 --> 00:08:32,070
and don't look
at the cameras, if you will.
212
00:08:32,090 --> 00:08:34,080
Okay?
Okay.
213
00:08:34,100 --> 00:08:35,260
(chuckles) I know
you can't stand this,
214
00:08:35,279 --> 00:08:39,039
but I think it's important
that people hear from you.
215
00:08:40,039 --> 00:08:41,139
First of all,
I gotta say,
216
00:08:41,159 --> 00:08:42,239
this is a cool house.
217
00:08:42,259 --> 00:08:44,089
Very.
Thank you.
218
00:08:44,110 --> 00:08:46,140
Thank you.
Seems kind of big though
for just one person.
219
00:08:46,159 --> 00:08:49,089
You know what,
this house was actually
in "Architectural Digest,"
220
00:08:49,110 --> 00:08:50,230
and then I think
it went to its head.
221
00:08:50,250 --> 00:08:52,090
(both chuckle)
222
00:08:52,110 --> 00:08:54,080
That's so funny.
But it's a nice house.
223
00:08:54,100 --> 00:08:57,100
It was designed mostly
for interviews like this,
so that's great.
224
00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:58,170
It's perfect.
Yep.
225
00:08:58,190 --> 00:09:00,180
Let's talk about the show.
226
00:09:01,269 --> 00:09:03,079
I cried.
227
00:09:03,100 --> 00:09:04,200
No, you were funny,
228
00:09:04,220 --> 00:09:07,070
and then you cried.
I mean, I was wetting myself.
229
00:09:07,090 --> 00:09:09,000
It's the perfect interview arc.
230
00:09:09,019 --> 00:09:10,039
Really?
Yes.
231
00:09:10,059 --> 00:09:11,099
Well, here's how I saw it.
232
00:09:11,120 --> 00:09:12,180
I cried, now I'm fucked.
233
00:09:12,200 --> 00:09:15,240
It was a manly misting.
Really?
234
00:09:15,259 --> 00:09:18,179
What about, uh, the part
where I grabbed the tissues?
235
00:09:21,159 --> 00:09:23,049
That's what I thought.
236
00:09:23,070 --> 00:09:25,210
Why not just televise
my shrink sessions?
237
00:09:25,230 --> 00:09:27,070
Would you be interested
in doing that?
238
00:09:28,080 --> 00:09:30,150
You know, fellas,
239
00:09:30,169 --> 00:09:33,169
from the bottom
of what's left
of my heart...
240
00:09:34,230 --> 00:09:35,260
take care of this.
241
00:09:35,279 --> 00:09:37,119
You got it.
Don't worry.
242
00:09:39,059 --> 00:09:41,169
Okay, look, Artie,
I can make a call.
243
00:09:41,190 --> 00:09:44,090
But I'll be honest with you,
they never edit out the crying.
244
00:09:44,110 --> 00:09:45,090
That's the cum-shot.
245
00:09:45,110 --> 00:09:46,260
I agree. Call her.
246
00:09:46,279 --> 00:09:48,229
What? You're having
dinner with her tonight.
247
00:09:48,250 --> 00:09:50,050
It's not a business dinner.
248
00:09:50,070 --> 00:09:52,120
All dinners
are business dinners.
249
00:09:52,139 --> 00:09:54,029
Um, that's Larry's.
250
00:09:54,049 --> 00:09:55,159
Well, can I have a plate?
251
00:09:55,179 --> 00:09:58,049
Well, maybe I'll leave
the knife out for you.
252
00:09:58,070 --> 00:09:59,150
(clears throat) Hi.
253
00:09:59,169 --> 00:10:01,019
Beverly, could you
excuse us for a minute?
254
00:10:01,039 --> 00:10:02,219
Mm-hmm.
Excuse me.
255
00:10:02,240 --> 00:10:03,240
Hello, Hank.
256
00:10:03,259 --> 00:10:04,279
Hello.
257
00:10:05,000 --> 00:10:06,050
I really need to talk to you.
258
00:10:06,070 --> 00:10:07,040
Okay.
259
00:10:07,059 --> 00:10:09,069
Um, do you want some--
do you want some food?
260
00:10:09,090 --> 00:10:11,150
No, thank you.
I've just been,
261
00:10:11,169 --> 00:10:14,089
um, trying to talk
to you about something.
All right.
262
00:10:15,149 --> 00:10:17,069
But it's very difficult.
263
00:10:17,090 --> 00:10:19,010
Well, what's so difficult?
264
00:10:20,019 --> 00:10:22,149
The thing that I want
to talk to you about.
265
00:10:23,190 --> 00:10:24,260
Oh.
266
00:10:24,279 --> 00:10:27,069
I'm sorry. I--
I'm sorry. I wanted to tell you.
267
00:10:27,090 --> 00:10:28,180
I-I-- I got it.
You do?
268
00:10:28,200 --> 00:10:29,250
Oh, yes! I--
269
00:10:29,269 --> 00:10:32,039
I can't believe I d--
I didn't recog--
I'm sorry.
270
00:10:32,059 --> 00:10:34,139
No, I didn't recognize it
before now.
I know.
271
00:10:34,159 --> 00:10:36,069
You got a crush on me.
272
00:10:40,090 --> 00:10:41,280
(chuckles)
273
00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:43,290
Okay, okay.
274
00:10:44,009 --> 00:10:47,219
Well, now that that hard part's
out of the way, um...
275
00:10:47,240 --> 00:10:51,010
want to have dinner
with me tonight?
276
00:10:51,029 --> 00:10:52,089
Great.
277
00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:57,090
You're so beautiful.
278
00:10:58,110 --> 00:10:59,120
Thank you.
279
00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:04,130
Say, I almost forgot. I have
a small request to ask you.
280
00:11:04,149 --> 00:11:06,119
Yes? Anything.
Uh...
281
00:11:07,250 --> 00:11:09,270
I wonder if you could see
a way clear to make a--
282
00:11:09,289 --> 00:11:13,099
just a tiny trim
in Larry's interview.
283
00:11:13,120 --> 00:11:14,230
A trim? What part?
284
00:11:14,250 --> 00:11:17,100
Oh, nothing significant.
Just where he cries.
285
00:11:17,120 --> 00:11:19,290
That is the best part
of the interview, Arthur,
286
00:11:20,009 --> 00:11:23,169
where we finally see
who Larry really is.
287
00:11:23,190 --> 00:11:25,270
It's the part he hides
every single night on the show.
288
00:11:25,289 --> 00:11:27,039
Exactly.
289
00:11:27,059 --> 00:11:29,009
So, why show it?
290
00:11:29,029 --> 00:11:31,039
I mean, it's like revealing
where the magic trick works.
291
00:11:31,059 --> 00:11:33,019
It is a fabulous interview.
292
00:11:33,039 --> 00:11:34,149
I-- I'm not gonna cut it.
293
00:11:34,169 --> 00:11:36,149
If you were a producer,
would you cut it?
294
00:11:36,169 --> 00:11:37,289
Only if you asked me.
295
00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:41,090
Are you telling me that
I have a bottle of champagne
296
00:11:41,110 --> 00:11:42,290
waiting at home
for nothing?
297
00:11:44,029 --> 00:11:45,059
Champagne?
298
00:11:45,080 --> 00:11:46,260
Avec moi?
299
00:11:47,289 --> 00:11:50,039
(chuckles, sniffs)
300
00:11:50,059 --> 00:11:53,069
Giorgio.
Oh, that was a great interview.
301
00:11:53,090 --> 00:11:55,200
(both laugh)
302
00:11:56,279 --> 00:11:58,049
Beverly?
303
00:11:58,070 --> 00:11:59,250
I-I-- I just want you to know
304
00:11:59,269 --> 00:12:01,209
I really appreciate
all your help this week.
305
00:12:01,230 --> 00:12:03,180
You're welcome, Hank.
And, um, I--
306
00:12:03,200 --> 00:12:05,030
if it's not too much
an imposition, I'd--
307
00:12:05,049 --> 00:12:07,239
I'd really like you to
do me a special favor.
What is that?
308
00:12:07,259 --> 00:12:09,129
Well, I know you're
really uncomfortable
309
00:12:09,149 --> 00:12:11,069
with doing
personal errands for me,
310
00:12:11,090 --> 00:12:13,180
but, uh, for this,
if you could make
an exception, I'd really,
311
00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:15,130
really be grateful.
312
00:12:15,149 --> 00:12:16,219
I-- I'd like you to--
313
00:12:16,240 --> 00:12:18,240
and-and please
keep an open mind--
314
00:12:18,259 --> 00:12:20,099
find some dog shit,
315
00:12:20,120 --> 00:12:21,220
take it over
to the Fox lot,
316
00:12:21,240 --> 00:12:23,250
and smear it
on Vince Vaughn's car.
317
00:12:25,000 --> 00:12:27,040
Hank, have you lost your mind?
318
00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:29,100
Is that a yes?
319
00:12:29,120 --> 00:12:30,160
What do you think?
320
00:12:30,179 --> 00:12:31,209
All right.
321
00:12:31,230 --> 00:12:33,000
I'll do it myself.
322
00:12:34,269 --> 00:12:35,289
Maybe I could talk about that
323
00:12:36,009 --> 00:12:37,259
because the real estate
agent, uh--
324
00:12:37,279 --> 00:12:39,259
you know how
they're kind of shysters?
325
00:12:39,279 --> 00:12:40,289
You know?
Mm-hmm.
326
00:12:41,009 --> 00:12:42,189
I won't say
what nationality he was, but--
327
00:12:42,210 --> 00:12:45,090
but he was showing me around
at the beginning.
328
00:12:45,110 --> 00:12:48,030
It's really great.
You know, he's walked me around.
329
00:12:48,049 --> 00:12:50,009
(mimics Asian accent)
"Oh, spacious backyard.
330
00:12:50,029 --> 00:12:52,089
"Lots of room
for roominess.
331
00:12:52,110 --> 00:12:55,270
"Black bottom pool
for Hollywood showbiz parties.
332
00:12:55,289 --> 00:12:57,229
Movie star like yourself."
333
00:12:57,250 --> 00:12:59,240
(normal voice)
And I go, "Yeah, great. Cool."
334
00:12:59,259 --> 00:13:02,289
And then when I finally pay
the big bucks and rent it,
335
00:13:03,009 --> 00:13:04,119
he's just whisking me through.
336
00:13:04,139 --> 00:13:05,139
It's all different now.
337
00:13:05,159 --> 00:13:06,269
He's like,
"Kitchen, bathroom,
let's go."
338
00:13:06,289 --> 00:13:08,109
And I go,
"Can I see the backyard?"
339
00:13:08,129 --> 00:13:10,209
He goes, "Fuck that. It's like
a spider convention out there."
(laughs)
340
00:13:10,230 --> 00:13:13,060
Hey, thought I heard
that beautiful laugh.
341
00:13:13,080 --> 00:13:15,140
What's going on?
What's so funny?
342
00:13:15,159 --> 00:13:17,199
(chuckles)
We're just doing
a pre-interview.
343
00:13:17,220 --> 00:13:20,280
Oh, sorry. Go ahead.
Don't let me, uh, interrupt.
344
00:13:22,019 --> 00:13:23,259
So what's
the biggest difference
345
00:13:23,279 --> 00:13:25,289
between doing
"Saturday Night Live"
346
00:13:26,009 --> 00:13:28,119
and, uh, doing a sitcom?
347
00:13:28,139 --> 00:13:29,279
Oh. Well, uh...
348
00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:31,280
it's weird coming
from "Saturday Night Live,"
349
00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:34,270
'cause on the sitcom,
now I'm the only backstabber
in the room.
350
00:13:34,289 --> 00:13:36,069
Oh. (chuckles)
I don't really--
351
00:13:36,090 --> 00:13:38,060
Do you want to have dinner
tonight at my place?
352
00:13:38,080 --> 00:13:40,050
I mean, I'll cook
and, you know,
we can watch,
353
00:13:40,070 --> 00:13:42,140
uh, Larry on "Extra."
What do you think?
354
00:13:42,159 --> 00:13:43,229
Hm?
355
00:13:43,250 --> 00:13:46,010
Mm-hmm. Great. Great.
356
00:13:46,029 --> 00:13:47,229
That would be--
um, excuse me.
357
00:13:47,250 --> 00:13:49,120
I have to get
a drink of water.
358
00:13:49,139 --> 00:13:50,259
Sure.
Hey.
359
00:13:52,019 --> 00:13:53,089
Bring your bathing suit.
360
00:13:53,110 --> 00:13:55,000
(chuckles nervously)
Uh-huh.
361
00:13:56,149 --> 00:13:57,289
She's-- she's a great girl.
362
00:13:58,009 --> 00:14:00,229
You stay away from her, shorty.
363
00:14:02,110 --> 00:14:04,000
He asked you to come
to his house for dinner?
364
00:14:04,019 --> 00:14:06,189
I know!
Okay, let me ask you something.
365
00:14:06,210 --> 00:14:08,020
Do you have a crush
on this guy?
366
00:14:08,039 --> 00:14:10,099
No!
Then why else
367
00:14:10,120 --> 00:14:11,120
aren't you telling him?
368
00:14:11,139 --> 00:14:13,179
All you have to do is
tell him you hit his car.
369
00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:15,170
I don't like guys like Hank!
370
00:14:15,190 --> 00:14:18,210
I like sensitive guys,
like musicians!
Okay. Mary Lou,
371
00:14:18,230 --> 00:14:22,110
he is planning to put dog poop
on Vince Vaughn's car.
372
00:14:22,129 --> 00:14:25,169
Or painters!
I like painters!
Oh, my god.
373
00:14:25,190 --> 00:14:28,120
Ugh! Tell him.
Okay? Tell him.
374
00:14:31,070 --> 00:14:34,010
We're back with,
uh, Jimmy Belushi.
375
00:14:34,029 --> 00:14:35,179
Jimmy, now this is your...
376
00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:37,170
this is your new CD.
Yes.
377
00:14:37,190 --> 00:14:39,190
And it's ca--
My only CD.
My first CD.
378
00:14:39,210 --> 00:14:42,190
My new CD.
And it's called, uh,
"36-22..."
379
00:14:42,210 --> 00:14:43,230
"36."
And what--
380
00:14:43,250 --> 00:14:45,050
what-- what kind
of music is it?
381
00:14:45,070 --> 00:14:46,150
Uh, it's rhythm and blues.
382
00:14:46,169 --> 00:14:48,259
It's, uh, you know,
a little soul, a little
swing in it,
383
00:14:48,279 --> 00:14:50,069
but, uh, mainly blues stock,
you know?
384
00:14:50,090 --> 00:14:52,140
Uh, "36-22-36."
385
00:14:52,159 --> 00:14:55,159
Look forward to having you on
sometime to play and to sing.
386
00:14:55,179 --> 00:14:57,049
We'll do that.
I wish we had time tonight,
387
00:14:57,070 --> 00:14:58,210
but of course we've got
Ben Folds Five.
388
00:14:58,230 --> 00:14:59,290
They're supposed to be hot.
389
00:15:00,009 --> 00:15:01,259
Well, you want to stay
and watch them?
I'd love to watch.
390
00:15:01,279 --> 00:15:03,269
Then you can tell them
what they're doing wrong
and so forth.
391
00:15:03,289 --> 00:15:05,069
I can coach 'em a little bit.
392
00:15:05,090 --> 00:15:07,170
We are so lucky
to have my next guests.
393
00:15:07,190 --> 00:15:09,210
They're-- this is
their current CD,
394
00:15:09,230 --> 00:15:13,050
uh, called, "Whatever, uh,
and Ever, Amen."
395
00:15:13,070 --> 00:15:14,100
And I'm a big fan.
396
00:15:14,120 --> 00:15:16,160
They're gonna sing
a new song called
397
00:15:16,179 --> 00:15:18,049
"Theme From Dr. Pyser."
398
00:15:18,070 --> 00:15:20,210
Please welcome Ben Folds Five.
(applause)
399
00:15:20,230 --> 00:15:22,180
♪ ♪
400
00:15:55,149 --> 00:15:58,219
I hear your, uh, interview
on "Extra" is gonna be
on tonight, huh?
401
00:15:59,220 --> 00:16:01,010
Yeah.
How'd it go?
402
00:16:02,100 --> 00:16:03,090
Great.
403
00:16:03,110 --> 00:16:05,040
Have you-- have you ever seen
Tim Allen on "Extra"?
404
00:16:05,059 --> 00:16:07,079
No.
Oh, man.
405
00:16:07,100 --> 00:16:09,130
He blubbered
like a fuckin' baby.
406
00:16:09,149 --> 00:16:12,099
I mean, it was the funniest
goddamn thing, you know,
honestly.
407
00:16:12,120 --> 00:16:14,200
I mean, he's like,
bawling and talking
about his family,
408
00:16:14,220 --> 00:16:15,250
and he's bawling.
Really?
409
00:16:15,269 --> 00:16:18,109
Yeah, then they put
the strings on, you know,
behind him.
410
00:16:18,129 --> 00:16:20,189
I mean, he made it worse.
"Come on, give me
a fucking"--
411
00:16:20,210 --> 00:16:22,010
What a pussy.
Pussy, man.
412
00:16:22,029 --> 00:16:23,249
Hey, I got a copy of the tape.
I'll give it to you.
413
00:16:23,269 --> 00:16:25,259
♪ ♪
414
00:17:03,070 --> 00:17:04,120
♪ ♪
415
00:17:12,289 --> 00:17:14,159
I didn't know
you cooked, Hank.
(man speaks on TV)
416
00:17:14,180 --> 00:17:16,270
Well... fondue.
417
00:17:16,289 --> 00:17:19,109
I mean, any retard
can melt cheese.
418
00:17:19,130 --> 00:17:21,270
(hisses)
Shit. It's hot.
419
00:17:21,289 --> 00:17:23,269
Aren't you supposed to have
stuff to dip in it?
420
00:17:23,289 --> 00:17:25,139
Ahh. No, I don't think so.
421
00:17:25,160 --> 00:17:28,200
Man on TV:
...last night and are now
13-1-1 on the season.
422
00:17:28,220 --> 00:17:31,150
In other action,
the Blizzards downed
the Rowdies, 3-1,
423
00:17:31,170 --> 00:17:34,200
and the Tornadoes bested
the Blizzards, 2-1.
424
00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:36,240
On the courts,
Lendl and Becker meet today--
425
00:17:36,259 --> 00:17:38,159
Larry's gonna be on soon.
426
00:17:39,200 --> 00:17:42,010
Here. Oh, no, no,
uh, let me help you with that.
427
00:17:42,029 --> 00:17:44,289
See, this is,
uh, volume up.
428
00:17:45,009 --> 00:17:46,099
Announcer:
This is "Extra."
429
00:17:46,119 --> 00:17:49,009
Now here's Maureen O'Boyle.
430
00:17:49,029 --> 00:17:50,139
Thanks for joining us.
431
00:17:50,160 --> 00:17:52,270
Tonight, the man
everyone in Hollywood
432
00:17:52,289 --> 00:17:54,189
has been waiting
to hear from.
433
00:17:54,210 --> 00:17:56,080
It's an "Extra" exclusive.
434
00:17:56,099 --> 00:17:58,999
Larry Sanders finally speaks.
435
00:17:59,019 --> 00:18:00,169
Thanks. I think I got it.
Okay.
436
00:18:00,190 --> 00:18:02,180
Maureen:
Well, first of all, I gotta say
this is a cool house.
437
00:18:02,200 --> 00:18:04,270
Very. Big though
for just one person.
438
00:18:04,289 --> 00:18:07,019
Larry:
This house was actually
in "Architectural Digest,"
439
00:18:07,039 --> 00:18:08,179
and then I think
it went to its head.
440
00:18:08,200 --> 00:18:10,170
Let's talk about the show.
441
00:18:10,190 --> 00:18:12,070
Okay.
442
00:18:12,089 --> 00:18:15,099
It seems to me that
you're passing the baton
to Jon Stewart.
443
00:18:15,119 --> 00:18:18,179
Well, I'd like to think
of it more as a-- as a torch.
444
00:18:18,200 --> 00:18:20,140
I think it's a little
more masculine.
Look at this.
445
00:18:20,160 --> 00:18:23,020
We're like a choo-choo here.
You know, so I like
to think of it that way.
446
00:18:23,039 --> 00:18:25,129
Maureen: But that does seem
to be the case.
Woo-woo.
447
00:18:25,150 --> 00:18:26,230
Yes, I think
he'll do a great job.
448
00:18:26,250 --> 00:18:28,280
He's a wonderful guy, and...
(Artie sighs)
449
00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:30,250
Here, drink up.
No, no, I--
I don't want--
450
00:18:30,269 --> 00:18:33,059
Let's see what else is on here.
Maureen: The show,
are you gonna miss it?
451
00:18:33,079 --> 00:18:34,109
What are you doing?
♪ ♪
452
00:18:34,130 --> 00:18:37,050
Oh, look! Hey!
Bonefishing on the flats.
453
00:18:37,069 --> 00:18:38,119
That's very exciting.
454
00:18:38,140 --> 00:18:39,240
Oh, come on, I wanna--
(channel changes)
455
00:18:39,259 --> 00:18:41,149
What are you doing?
Larry on TV: Probably.
456
00:18:41,170 --> 00:18:43,030
This is good.
You know, it's a grind,
457
00:18:43,049 --> 00:18:45,149
you know, night after night.
People forget.
458
00:18:46,150 --> 00:18:47,150
Takes a lot of discipline,
459
00:18:47,170 --> 00:18:48,250
dedication, commitment.
460
00:18:48,269 --> 00:18:50,069
I think she's good.
I'll miss it.
461
00:18:50,089 --> 00:18:51,249
What about the people?
462
00:18:51,269 --> 00:18:54,159
The people? Like you mean
like the audience and so forth?
463
00:18:54,180 --> 00:18:56,070
No, the people
you work with.
464
00:18:56,089 --> 00:18:57,219
Like Artie,
465
00:18:57,240 --> 00:18:59,070
and Hank...
466
00:19:05,200 --> 00:19:07,140
You know, Hank...
467
00:19:09,180 --> 00:19:12,020
is like a brother that
I sort of never had.
468
00:19:12,039 --> 00:19:13,019
Really.
469
00:19:13,039 --> 00:19:14,039
Uh...
470
00:19:15,039 --> 00:19:17,109
One time, I lost my cat,
471
00:19:17,130 --> 00:19:19,190
and he, uh...
472
00:19:22,140 --> 00:19:25,090
he brought me
another cat, and, uh...
473
00:19:25,109 --> 00:19:26,229
(sobs)
474
00:19:28,009 --> 00:19:31,189
(laughs)
Oh, god, no.
475
00:19:31,210 --> 00:19:34,000
Honey, honey, look at this.
Larry's crying. Look at that.
476
00:19:34,019 --> 00:19:37,149
Like a big baby!
(laughs)
477
00:19:37,170 --> 00:19:39,250
Larry, what are you doing?
I-- I gotta record this.
478
00:19:39,269 --> 00:19:41,159
I gotta record this.
I gotta record this.
479
00:19:41,180 --> 00:19:43,140
And, uh...
Artie: She didn't cut it!
480
00:19:43,160 --> 00:19:46,090
...he had this cat and he--
he named it Patches,
481
00:19:46,109 --> 00:19:48,009
but yet, it was, um...
482
00:19:48,029 --> 00:19:49,079
all one color.
(chuckles)
483
00:19:49,099 --> 00:19:52,219
So, uh...
She wouldn't cut it!
484
00:19:52,240 --> 00:19:54,270
I don't know
what that was about.
I couldn't get her to cut it.
485
00:19:54,289 --> 00:19:56,149
You know what a slut I am
486
00:19:56,170 --> 00:19:59,110
around Giorgio perfume,
and I just...
487
00:20:00,140 --> 00:20:02,120
I just have
no will of my own.
488
00:20:05,240 --> 00:20:09,100
Larry on TV:
He once gave me painting
of a tree that he made,
489
00:20:09,119 --> 00:20:13,059
and, uh...
(sniffles)
490
00:20:13,079 --> 00:20:15,019
Oh, Larry.
(Larry cries)
491
00:20:15,039 --> 00:20:16,199
Larry.
492
00:20:16,220 --> 00:20:18,270
Larry on TV:
I think it was a tree.
493
00:20:18,289 --> 00:20:21,239
I don't know,
but I couldn't even ask him,
(sobs)
494
00:20:21,259 --> 00:20:23,119
because it would
hurt his feelings.
495
00:20:23,140 --> 00:20:24,260
It was a tree.
496
00:20:24,279 --> 00:20:26,189
(Larry sighs)
497
00:20:28,059 --> 00:20:31,159
Larry on TV:
My assistant's so loyal.
Such a loyal woman who--
498
00:20:31,180 --> 00:20:33,040
Hey, look!
That's the same couch
499
00:20:33,059 --> 00:20:34,239
we're sitting on
right there!
500
00:20:34,259 --> 00:20:36,149
Shut up.
501
00:20:36,170 --> 00:20:38,110
Hank, you're really upset.
502
00:20:40,009 --> 00:20:41,189
I didn't know
you were so sensitive.
503
00:20:42,250 --> 00:20:45,170
(chuckles)
All right, all right, all right.
504
00:20:47,289 --> 00:20:49,139
Okay, okay.
505
00:20:54,230 --> 00:20:56,060
Maureen:
You're joking sort of,
506
00:20:56,079 --> 00:20:59,059
but I think
that underneath there...
507
00:21:00,220 --> 00:21:01,220
you really do hurt.
508
00:21:03,250 --> 00:21:05,180
I hit your car.
509
00:21:05,200 --> 00:21:09,180
Let's talk--
Sometimes I feel violent.
510
00:21:09,200 --> 00:21:10,240
Maureen:
Violent?
(Larry whispers)
511
00:21:12,130 --> 00:21:13,270
Vince Vaughn.
512
00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:23,130
Did you put shit
on my car, Hank?
513
00:21:23,150 --> 00:21:25,250
Get up, Hank!
Did you put shit on my car?
514
00:21:25,269 --> 00:21:28,029
Huh?
Uh...
515
00:21:28,049 --> 00:21:30,149
Did you put shit
on my car, Hank?
516
00:21:30,170 --> 00:21:32,100
Uh, I was just
writing you a note.
517
00:21:32,119 --> 00:21:34,079
Can I--
can I read it to you?
518
00:21:34,099 --> 00:21:35,219
Please?
"Dear Mr. Vaughn,
519
00:21:35,240 --> 00:21:37,260
I am sorry about the shit
I put on your car."
520
00:21:37,279 --> 00:21:39,159
So you did put shit
on my car, didn't you, Hank?
521
00:21:39,180 --> 00:21:41,020
Huh?
There's more.
522
00:21:41,039 --> 00:21:43,059
Plea-- Can you move?
523
00:21:43,079 --> 00:21:45,159
"Please forgive me.
The girl I'm dating is crazy
524
00:21:45,180 --> 00:21:47,130
"and didn't tell me
she-- she hit my car,
525
00:21:47,150 --> 00:21:48,200
"so I assumed
it was you.
526
00:21:48,220 --> 00:21:51,090
"Women. What are
you gonna do?
527
00:21:51,109 --> 00:21:54,109
"By the way,
I thought 'Swingers'
was a hoot and a half.
528
00:21:54,130 --> 00:21:57,090
Regards,
Hank Kingsley."
529
00:21:57,109 --> 00:21:58,119
(chuckles)
530
00:21:58,140 --> 00:22:00,240
You know, I dated
a crazy girl one time, too.
531
00:22:00,259 --> 00:22:03,039
When I broke up with her,
she kept leaving
532
00:22:03,059 --> 00:22:05,009
dead stuff on my porch
for about six months.
533
00:22:05,029 --> 00:22:06,239
Oh, bummer, man.
Mainly squirrels.
534
00:22:06,259 --> 00:22:08,179
Squirrels? Oh, bitches.
Yeah.
535
00:22:08,200 --> 00:22:09,280
I know.
536
00:22:16,109 --> 00:22:18,259
Hey, good morning, Larry.
Hey, man, look, I just wanted
Morning.
537
00:22:18,279 --> 00:22:21,069
to say that I saw the interview
that you did last night
Yeah.
538
00:22:21,089 --> 00:22:22,229
and it was really touching.
539
00:22:22,250 --> 00:22:24,210
Appreciate it.
And I just wanted
to say thanks.
540
00:22:24,230 --> 00:22:27,120
Thank you.
Larry, that was
so sweet last night!
541
00:22:27,140 --> 00:22:29,190
Thanks.
Larry, I just--
542
00:22:29,210 --> 00:22:31,010
Thanks.
543
00:22:32,289 --> 00:22:35,039
(exhales)
You know what, buddy?
544
00:22:35,059 --> 00:22:36,269
They feel closer to you.
545
00:22:38,130 --> 00:22:40,030
I-- I can't live like this.
546
00:22:40,049 --> 00:22:41,189
(theme music playing)
39849
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