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1
00:00:03,862 --> 00:00:05,482
[ music playing ]
2
00:00:05,482 --> 00:00:08,662
[ singing ] ♪ Think of waterfalls
3
00:00:09,793 --> 00:00:11,453
Okay. Pee.
4
00:00:14,068 --> 00:00:15,968
Someone'’s in here.
5
00:00:15,965 --> 00:00:17,825
Can I please come in?
6
00:00:17,827 --> 00:00:20,207
- No!
- Okay, but I have to brush
my teeth before I go to...
7
00:00:20,206 --> 00:00:21,966
Get a bagel
and come back home.
8
00:00:21,965 --> 00:00:24,375
- ...work.
- Can you please just give me
like a minute?
9
00:00:24,379 --> 00:00:26,379
Okay? She probably thinks I'’m pooping.
10
00:00:26,379 --> 00:00:28,789
Uh, you'’re pooping
so hard right now.
11
00:00:28,793 --> 00:00:30,343
I am not pooping so hard!
12
00:00:30,344 --> 00:00:32,794
I just can'’t pee.
13
00:00:32,793 --> 00:00:35,973
Okay, and it'’s not helping
that you'’re standing
right there.
14
00:00:35,965 --> 00:00:37,405
Rough sex?
15
00:00:37,413 --> 00:00:39,903
No, the last man I was with
was gentle.
16
00:00:39,896 --> 00:00:41,586
Disarmingly gentle.
17
00:00:41,586 --> 00:00:44,206
Wait, who did you--
I'’ll think about this later.
18
00:00:44,206 --> 00:00:46,206
Okay, you probably
got a UTI.
19
00:00:46,206 --> 00:00:48,206
[ grunts ]
20
00:00:48,206 --> 00:00:49,996
Put some water on it.
21
00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:53,000
- On what?
- On your vag?
22
00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:54,590
No! Why?
23
00:00:54,586 --> 00:00:56,656
It'’s science.
It'’ll make you pee.
24
00:00:56,655 --> 00:00:58,475
That'’s nonsense.
25
00:00:58,482 --> 00:01:00,482
Okay, if you do not
put water on it,
26
00:01:00,482 --> 00:01:03,312
I am going to break
this door down.
27
00:01:03,310 --> 00:01:05,310
Ugh, this feels humiliating
28
00:01:05,310 --> 00:01:08,410
even though I'’m just in front
of myself.
29
00:01:17,965 --> 00:01:20,615
Oh, no! It feels weird.
30
00:01:20,620 --> 00:01:22,100
Why did--
31
00:01:22,103 --> 00:01:24,523
Oh, my God!
I'’m peeing!
32
00:01:24,517 --> 00:01:26,517
- Immediately.
- I told you.
33
00:01:26,517 --> 00:01:27,717
- See, that'’s all you--
- Get out!
34
00:01:27,724 --> 00:01:30,904
Can I at least get
my toothbrush?
35
00:01:30,896 --> 00:01:32,826
[ music playing ]
36
00:01:34,379 --> 00:01:36,619
I hope I look cute perched
on the counter.
37
00:01:36,620 --> 00:01:38,620
But not like trying to look too cute.
38
00:01:38,620 --> 00:01:41,030
[ gasps ] This may have been too bold of a choice.
39
00:01:41,034 --> 00:01:43,764
The wind really messed
with these blinds, huh?
40
00:01:43,758 --> 00:01:45,928
I'’m so glad he'’s not a proper handyman.
41
00:01:45,931 --> 00:01:47,241
If he was he'’d know
42
00:01:47,241 --> 00:01:50,481
I'’m the perpetrator, not the wind.
43
00:01:50,482 --> 00:01:53,002
Supposed to screw
the twirly rod into the--
44
00:01:53,000 --> 00:01:55,000
into that thing.
45
00:01:55,000 --> 00:01:56,660
Judy never taught me how.
46
00:01:56,655 --> 00:02:00,095
She taught me a lot
of other things, though.
47
00:02:00,103 --> 00:02:02,343
I wanna be the one to help you love again.
48
00:02:02,344 --> 00:02:05,524
This duct tape ought
to do the trick.
49
00:02:05,517 --> 00:02:06,997
It won'’t, but that'’s okay.
50
00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:09,170
It'’ll break, and you'’ll be back sooner.
51
00:02:09,172 --> 00:02:11,142
So, doing anything fun today?
52
00:02:11,137 --> 00:02:13,967
Uh, I gotta shop
for a new pillow.
53
00:02:13,965 --> 00:02:17,375
All my sleep crying has
essentially deteriorated
the foam.
54
00:02:17,379 --> 00:02:18,719
Oh, landlord'’s here.
55
00:02:18,724 --> 00:02:20,384
I gotta put some pants on.
56
00:02:22,137 --> 00:02:24,827
No, you'’re not gonna change
for a man.
57
00:02:24,827 --> 00:02:25,997
Yeah, [ bleep ] pants.
58
00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:27,900
- No, I got-- all right.
- Oh! Oh, my God!
59
00:02:27,896 --> 00:02:30,336
Oh, God, look at her.
So nervous.
60
00:02:30,344 --> 00:02:32,694
[ nervous chuckle ]
61
00:02:32,689 --> 00:02:35,829
Don'’t worry, June.
Uncle Kat coming in hot.
62
00:02:35,827 --> 00:02:37,827
[ mimics sizzling ]
63
00:02:37,827 --> 00:02:38,967
What is she doing?
64
00:02:38,965 --> 00:02:40,995
Did she just forget to put pants on?
65
00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:42,900
Hey, guys.
66
00:02:45,034 --> 00:02:48,524
I just found out that lithium
batteries make you really horny.
67
00:02:48,517 --> 00:02:51,687
- Morning, Kat.
- I was just talking to David.
68
00:02:51,689 --> 00:02:55,279
Kat, you know,
like... alone.
69
00:02:55,275 --> 00:02:56,685
[ groans ]
Sorry, bit my tongue.
70
00:02:56,689 --> 00:02:59,069
June, why'’d you break
the blinds again?
71
00:02:59,068 --> 00:03:02,968
It was... the wind.
72
00:03:02,965 --> 00:03:05,095
- [ whispers ] No, it wasn'’t.
- [ whispers ] Get out!
73
00:03:05,103 --> 00:03:06,903
[ David sighs ]
74
00:03:06,896 --> 00:03:09,376
[ no audible dialogue ]
75
00:03:09,379 --> 00:03:10,689
[ whispers ]
Out!
76
00:03:14,758 --> 00:03:16,688
See you, guys.
77
00:03:19,931 --> 00:03:22,071
Dear God,
I hope you'’re wearing pants.
78
00:03:22,068 --> 00:03:23,998
I have thick undies.
79
00:03:24,000 --> 00:03:27,340
Hey, June, you wanna know
a fun idea that will be
impossible to say no to?
80
00:03:27,344 --> 00:03:29,554
No.
81
00:03:29,551 --> 00:03:32,071
Let'’s Facebook stalk
our substitute teachers
82
00:03:32,068 --> 00:03:34,098
and see if our opinion of them
still holds up.
83
00:03:34,103 --> 00:03:37,933
I'’m actually friends with them
and they'’re lovely.
84
00:03:37,931 --> 00:03:39,451
Okay, well,
you wanna get high
85
00:03:39,448 --> 00:03:41,548
and talk
about the sexual awakening
86
00:03:41,551 --> 00:03:43,551
Jim Henson movies triggered
within us?
87
00:03:43,551 --> 00:03:44,901
Maybe another time.
88
00:03:44,896 --> 00:03:46,716
I'’m actually gonna go
on a run by myself.
89
00:03:46,724 --> 00:03:48,934
Oh, okay. Fine.
I don'’t need your attention.
90
00:03:48,931 --> 00:03:50,141
I don'’t need it.
91
00:03:50,137 --> 00:03:51,787
- Seems like you might.
- Negative.
92
00:03:51,793 --> 00:03:56,243
I have a date with someone
way hotter than you.
93
00:03:56,241 --> 00:03:58,481
- Myself.
- Ew. That'’s disgusting.
94
00:03:58,482 --> 00:04:02,212
[ grunts ]
Okay, I'’m going
to artistically journal
95
00:04:02,206 --> 00:04:04,206
at the dog park.
96
00:04:04,206 --> 00:04:06,306
After... that.
97
00:04:07,310 --> 00:04:10,000
Oh, come on.
98
00:04:11,827 --> 00:04:15,337
Okay, Kat, [ bleep ] Fear'’s
gonna do a play about...
99
00:04:15,344 --> 00:04:17,174
what scares you?
100
00:04:17,172 --> 00:04:19,172
What scares the world?
101
00:04:19,172 --> 00:04:20,452
Murder.
102
00:04:20,448 --> 00:04:21,858
Disease.
103
00:04:21,862 --> 00:04:24,552
Older family members
on Facebook.
104
00:04:24,551 --> 00:04:27,481
Hello, dog owner.
105
00:04:27,482 --> 00:04:29,172
Mama don'’t got time to journal
106
00:04:29,172 --> 00:04:32,242
when this sweet, fresh
dick'’s right in front of her.
107
00:04:32,241 --> 00:04:34,621
He'’s gonna sit, stay,
108
00:04:34,620 --> 00:04:38,410
and roll over
when he sees these boobs.
109
00:04:40,034 --> 00:04:42,554
- Hey.
- Hey.
110
00:04:42,551 --> 00:04:44,551
How you doing?
111
00:04:44,551 --> 00:04:46,241
Come here often?
112
00:04:46,241 --> 00:04:48,761
Constantly.
113
00:04:48,758 --> 00:04:50,828
Uh, my dog'’s incontinent,
114
00:04:50,827 --> 00:04:53,067
- if you'’re wondering.
- That'’s hot.
115
00:04:53,068 --> 00:04:54,548
What are you writing?
116
00:04:54,551 --> 00:04:56,281
Oh, just my feelings.
117
00:04:56,275 --> 00:04:58,305
- I'’m an artist.
- Me, too.
118
00:04:58,310 --> 00:05:00,790
I'’m Tyler.
119
00:05:00,793 --> 00:05:02,283
Kat.
120
00:05:02,275 --> 00:05:05,095
You may have seen
my stuff on Etsy.
121
00:05:05,103 --> 00:05:07,973
I'’m known for these rocks
I paint to look
like Tamagotchis.
122
00:05:07,965 --> 00:05:10,025
I really like the clash
of nature
123
00:05:10,034 --> 00:05:14,524
juxtaposed with cold,
steely technology.
124
00:05:15,586 --> 00:05:18,516
- May I?
- Sure.
125
00:05:18,517 --> 00:05:21,927
I think this is the man
of my literal dreams.
126
00:05:21,931 --> 00:05:24,791
Because I had this dream years
ago that I met an artsy man,
127
00:05:24,793 --> 00:05:26,833
who sold rocks on Etsy.
128
00:05:26,827 --> 00:05:29,927
Oh, my God!
I dreamt up Etsy.
129
00:05:30,896 --> 00:05:35,966
Now... imagine this
on a rock.
130
00:05:38,241 --> 00:05:39,861
Yeah.
131
00:05:39,862 --> 00:05:45,862
Hey, um, do you wanna
get dinner sometime?
132
00:05:45,862 --> 00:05:48,002
We could talk
about your sordid past.
133
00:05:48,000 --> 00:05:50,030
I would love to.
134
00:05:50,034 --> 00:05:52,174
- Oh, cool. I'’d--
- But I can'’t.
135
00:05:52,172 --> 00:05:54,072
Oh.
136
00:05:54,068 --> 00:05:57,068
- You'’re gay.
- No, but I do sleep
with couples sometimes.
137
00:05:57,068 --> 00:06:00,448
- Yum.
- But, no, it'’s that my brother
is living with me right now
138
00:06:00,448 --> 00:06:01,898
after going
through a terrible break-up.
139
00:06:01,896 --> 00:06:03,966
- He'’s an emotional minefield.
- Oh.
140
00:06:03,965 --> 00:06:06,925
I'’d feel terrible rubbing
a hot woman in his face.
141
00:06:06,931 --> 00:06:09,521
- Hot woman.
- He'’s kinda boring and weird.
142
00:06:09,517 --> 00:06:10,757
Boring and weird.
143
00:06:10,758 --> 00:06:12,658
I know just the woman
for that.
144
00:06:12,655 --> 00:06:14,715
Are you guys open
to having a double date?
145
00:06:14,724 --> 00:06:16,934
Huh.
146
00:06:16,931 --> 00:06:19,141
That could help him
get over Dolly.
147
00:06:19,137 --> 00:06:21,237
And make him stop sulking
around my house all day
148
00:06:21,241 --> 00:06:22,551
watching "Grace and Frankie."
149
00:06:22,551 --> 00:06:24,071
June will be perfect.
150
00:06:24,068 --> 00:06:26,518
Her favorite genre is women
in their golden years
151
00:06:26,517 --> 00:06:28,027
taking back their life.
152
00:06:28,034 --> 00:06:30,384
So, I'’ll see ya.
153
00:06:30,379 --> 00:06:32,479
See ya then.
154
00:06:33,862 --> 00:06:35,662
Mmm.
155
00:06:35,655 --> 00:06:37,405
What a snack.
156
00:06:37,413 --> 00:06:39,523
[ music playing ]
157
00:06:48,137 --> 00:06:49,967
Licks of sweet.
158
00:06:49,965 --> 00:06:53,585
I'’m like a spoiled
pioneer lady.
159
00:06:53,586 --> 00:06:55,376
- [ screams ]
- Oh! Hey. Oh!
160
00:06:55,379 --> 00:06:56,899
- Okay, well--
- Carrots.
161
00:06:56,896 --> 00:06:58,306
- Those are mine.
Those are my carrots.
- Oh, snack.
162
00:06:58,310 --> 00:06:59,720
Hey, but listen,
I have to tell you something.
163
00:06:59,724 --> 00:07:01,554
I met the most perfect
man today,
164
00:07:01,551 --> 00:07:02,931
but in order for me
to go on a date,
165
00:07:02,931 --> 00:07:05,031
you have to date
his super depressed brother.
166
00:07:05,034 --> 00:07:07,104
- What?
- No, it'’s gonna be good
for you, June.
167
00:07:07,103 --> 00:07:09,723
I saw the way that you
and David interacted earlier,
168
00:07:09,724 --> 00:07:11,764
and it was terrible.
169
00:07:11,758 --> 00:07:15,308
For the record, I felt like
it was a pretty standard
level awkwardness.
170
00:07:15,310 --> 00:07:16,590
It was a train wreck.
171
00:07:16,586 --> 00:07:17,756
You'’re never gonna bone David
like that.
172
00:07:17,758 --> 00:07:19,828
What you need is practice.
173
00:07:19,827 --> 00:07:21,997
- Boning practice?
- No, like,
174
00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:24,480
go on a date with a guy
that you don'’t care about
175
00:07:24,482 --> 00:07:28,172
so that you can figure out
how to be a normal human woman.
176
00:07:28,172 --> 00:07:30,592
Um, I don'’t think
that'’s my thing, Kat.
177
00:07:30,586 --> 00:07:32,826
We'’ll make it your thing, baby.
178
00:07:32,827 --> 00:07:34,517
I don'’t know.
179
00:07:34,517 --> 00:07:37,517
Do Olympic skiers get gold
the first time they run
down the hill?
180
00:07:37,517 --> 00:07:38,757
No. Right.
181
00:07:38,758 --> 00:07:40,758
Fine. Okay.
182
00:07:40,758 --> 00:07:44,898
I guess I'’ll learn how
to be a regular human woman.
183
00:07:44,896 --> 00:07:48,066
- Yes.
- Cheers, everyone!
[ chuckles ]
184
00:07:48,068 --> 00:07:49,278
Yes!
185
00:07:49,275 --> 00:07:51,445
Look at this party.
It'’s crazy.
186
00:07:51,448 --> 00:07:53,238
- [ nervous laugh ]
- Okay.
187
00:07:53,241 --> 00:07:55,901
So, June, is this your idea
of a regular human woman?
188
00:07:55,896 --> 00:07:56,996
Yes.
189
00:07:57,000 --> 00:08:00,340
Yeah, you definitely
have it all wrong.
190
00:08:00,344 --> 00:08:03,214
Okay, we need to have
a pre-practice practice.
191
00:08:03,206 --> 00:08:04,476
Come on.
192
00:08:04,482 --> 00:08:07,242
Let'’s go wash your hands,
you child.
193
00:08:09,379 --> 00:08:13,759
So, how was your day... Bill?
194
00:08:13,758 --> 00:08:16,758
No, June, think personal.
195
00:08:16,758 --> 00:08:19,968
Think... flirty.
196
00:08:19,965 --> 00:08:20,895
Okay.
197
00:08:22,448 --> 00:08:23,828
Are you circumcised?
198
00:08:23,827 --> 00:08:25,717
- Very.
- Okay, that'’s too personal.
199
00:08:25,724 --> 00:08:27,214
Stay in flirty.
200
00:08:27,206 --> 00:08:28,716
Do you pray before bed?
201
00:08:28,724 --> 00:08:31,554
- Very.
- Okay, this is hopeless.
202
00:08:31,551 --> 00:08:34,341
You guys...
203
00:08:34,344 --> 00:08:36,934
we'’ve gotta tell her
about The Golden Trio.
204
00:08:36,931 --> 00:08:38,861
We can'’t.
We made a blood oath
205
00:08:38,862 --> 00:08:40,102
never to use
The Golden Trio again.
206
00:08:40,103 --> 00:08:42,343
No one can handle
its awesome power.
207
00:08:42,344 --> 00:08:44,414
Remember Pepper?
208
00:08:44,413 --> 00:08:46,693
We swore never
to say her name.
209
00:08:46,689 --> 00:08:47,859
Pepper, Pepper, Pepper!
210
00:08:47,862 --> 00:08:49,522
- Stop! No!
- You stop!
211
00:08:49,517 --> 00:08:52,827
- Kat: Okay, all right.
- June, can'’t handle the Trio!
212
00:08:52,827 --> 00:08:55,307
I-- I can handle it.
Tell-- Tell me.
213
00:08:55,310 --> 00:08:56,760
Okay, we have to tell her.
214
00:08:56,758 --> 00:08:58,758
I can'’t miss out
on my perfect man.
215
00:08:58,758 --> 00:09:00,788
June, I'’m gonna give you
three words.
216
00:09:00,793 --> 00:09:03,243
Rug, tug, smug.
217
00:09:03,241 --> 00:09:04,791
- Okay.
- Rug.
218
00:09:07,275 --> 00:09:09,515
Pretend he'’s a rug.
Walk all over him.
219
00:09:09,517 --> 00:09:11,027
- Spill crumbs.
- Pee on him.
220
00:09:11,034 --> 00:09:12,934
- [ gasps ]
- Tug.
221
00:09:12,931 --> 00:09:14,691
Think light,
physical violence.
222
00:09:14,689 --> 00:09:15,899
Mini hits.
223
00:09:15,896 --> 00:09:17,926
- Punches.
- Fun chokehold.
224
00:09:17,931 --> 00:09:19,931
Okay, there'’s--
there'’s no way this works.
225
00:09:19,931 --> 00:09:22,281
Oh, it'’s a hundred
percent guarantee.
226
00:09:22,275 --> 00:09:23,585
Now, smug.
227
00:09:23,586 --> 00:09:24,966
Look smug.
228
00:09:24,965 --> 00:09:26,375
Because you'’re better
than him.
229
00:09:26,379 --> 00:09:27,719
He'’s your rug,
230
00:09:27,724 --> 00:09:29,344
that you tug.
231
00:09:29,344 --> 00:09:31,344
Understand?
232
00:09:31,344 --> 00:09:32,794
[ whispers ]
Barely.
233
00:09:32,793 --> 00:09:35,833
Great.
Now, the most important.
234
00:09:35,827 --> 00:09:37,787
Wait, I thought
there were three.
235
00:09:37,793 --> 00:09:41,143
SMUM.
236
00:09:41,137 --> 00:09:43,027
SMUM.
237
00:09:45,103 --> 00:09:48,283
Stare directly into his eyes,
238
00:09:48,275 --> 00:09:52,375
and smile really big
for way too long.
239
00:09:53,931 --> 00:09:57,101
Then make a light mmm sound.
240
00:09:57,103 --> 00:09:58,973
So he thinks he hears something.
241
00:09:58,965 --> 00:10:00,545
Or has an ear infection.
242
00:10:00,551 --> 00:10:03,481
Or a tiny brain tumor.
243
00:10:03,482 --> 00:10:05,382
[ all high-pitched humming ]
244
00:10:06,965 --> 00:10:09,235
[ June high-pitched humming ]
245
00:10:11,965 --> 00:10:15,135
He won'’t be able
to resist you.
246
00:10:15,137 --> 00:10:17,167
Wait, sorry.
If it'’s so important,
247
00:10:17,172 --> 00:10:21,002
why isn'’t it in the title
of The Golden Trio?
248
00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:22,520
We'’ve had a lot of debates
about this.
249
00:10:22,517 --> 00:10:24,687
It'’s because
it doesn'’t rhyme.
250
00:10:24,689 --> 00:10:25,899
It'’s a portmanteau.
251
00:10:25,896 --> 00:10:27,686
[ gasps ]
I love portmanteauses.
252
00:10:27,689 --> 00:10:29,339
Me, too.
253
00:10:29,344 --> 00:10:31,004
What'’s your favorite
blended word?
Mine'’s garage.
254
00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:33,550
Oh! Um, tough one.
Probably skort.
255
00:10:33,551 --> 00:10:35,071
Just because it'’s such
a great invention.
256
00:10:35,068 --> 00:10:36,898
Okay, we don'’t have time
for this.
257
00:10:36,896 --> 00:10:39,756
June is not gonna
[ bleep ] herself!
258
00:10:39,758 --> 00:10:41,448
[ music playing ]
259
00:10:41,448 --> 00:10:42,688
Are you ready?
260
00:10:42,689 --> 00:10:44,859
Rug, tug, smug, SMUM.
261
00:10:44,862 --> 00:10:46,342
As ready
as I'’ll ever be.
262
00:10:46,344 --> 00:10:48,384
Hey!
263
00:10:48,379 --> 00:10:49,689
- Oh, hey.
- Hey.
264
00:10:49,689 --> 00:10:51,689
- Uh, I made you this.
- Oh!
265
00:10:51,689 --> 00:10:52,829
It'’s a Tamagotchi cat.
266
00:10:52,827 --> 00:10:54,857
Like you.
Keep her alive.
267
00:10:54,862 --> 00:10:57,592
I'’ve never held
such precious art.
268
00:10:57,586 --> 00:10:59,896
Uh, this is my brother,
Mitch.
269
00:10:59,896 --> 00:11:02,206
Bathrooms here suck.
270
00:11:02,206 --> 00:11:03,756
Oh, bummer.
271
00:11:03,758 --> 00:11:05,098
Okay, focus.
272
00:11:05,103 --> 00:11:06,693
I can flirt with this guy.
273
00:11:06,689 --> 00:11:08,689
Remember,
the stakes are so low,
274
00:11:08,689 --> 00:11:10,279
I basically don'’t exist.
275
00:11:10,275 --> 00:11:12,135
So, anything on the menu
look good?
276
00:11:12,137 --> 00:11:14,547
Well, most of this
I can'’t eat.
277
00:11:14,551 --> 00:11:18,071
Oh, do you have, um,
like celiac disease
or something?
278
00:11:18,068 --> 00:11:19,688
I wish.
279
00:11:19,689 --> 00:11:22,139
I basically can'’t eat any fruits
or vegetables or I'’ll die.
280
00:11:22,137 --> 00:11:24,827
It'’s a vitamin A imbalance.
281
00:11:24,827 --> 00:11:26,827
Oh, he'’s ridiculous.
282
00:11:26,827 --> 00:11:28,587
Time to rug.
283
00:11:28,586 --> 00:11:30,516
But you can drink tequila?
284
00:11:30,517 --> 00:11:32,517
That'’s bull.
285
00:11:32,517 --> 00:11:35,137
Shit.
286
00:11:35,137 --> 00:11:36,897
Hey, guys,
what can I get for ya?
287
00:11:36,896 --> 00:11:38,236
Yeah, I'’ll order.
288
00:11:38,241 --> 00:11:40,661
We'’ll have two Cadillac
margaritas,
289
00:11:40,655 --> 00:11:44,025
and the lady and I will have a
plate of the pulled pork nachos.
290
00:11:44,034 --> 00:11:46,344
- Extra spicy.
- Okay.
291
00:11:46,344 --> 00:11:49,244
[ mocking baby voice ]
If his little baby
body can take it.
292
00:11:49,241 --> 00:11:52,001
- Wait, you didn'’t even let me
order-- I--
- Your shirt'’s dumb.
293
00:11:53,931 --> 00:11:57,101
Yeah. Yeah, I wasn'’t sure
if it was right.
294
00:11:57,103 --> 00:11:59,933
Or, uh, cool?
I don'’t know.
295
00:12:02,034 --> 00:12:04,484
My mom was always really
critical about my shirts.
296
00:12:04,482 --> 00:12:06,522
Yeah, I can see that.
297
00:12:07,689 --> 00:12:09,099
This one means wisdom,
298
00:12:09,103 --> 00:12:11,863
and this one means suck it.
299
00:12:11,862 --> 00:12:13,902
Took about eight sittings.
300
00:12:13,896 --> 00:12:15,336
You sit there,
you learn about yourself.
301
00:12:15,344 --> 00:12:17,104
So cool.
I'’ve always wanted a tatt--
302
00:12:17,103 --> 00:12:19,213
When you get a tattoo
you'’re basically saying
303
00:12:19,206 --> 00:12:23,066
"[ bleep ] you"
to the idea of death.
304
00:12:23,068 --> 00:12:24,788
'’cause ink is permanent.
305
00:12:24,793 --> 00:12:26,003
Yawn!
306
00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:27,140
Can'’t wash it off.
307
00:12:27,137 --> 00:12:28,857
A lot of people
don'’t know that.
308
00:12:28,862 --> 00:12:31,932
Wow! Look like old June'’s
really getting the hang
309
00:12:31,931 --> 00:12:33,521
of The Golden Trio
plus one.
310
00:12:33,517 --> 00:12:37,167
I have never seen its power
employed so deftly.
311
00:12:37,172 --> 00:12:40,172
Ugh! All this guy'’s talking
about is his tattoo.
312
00:12:40,172 --> 00:12:42,552
He hasn'’t asked me
one question.
313
00:12:42,551 --> 00:12:43,931
It'’s a deeper color.
314
00:12:43,931 --> 00:12:46,211
And it goes deeper
in your skin, too.
315
00:12:46,206 --> 00:12:49,926
The quality of kuro sumi ink
is unrivaled--
316
00:12:49,931 --> 00:12:52,931
Mitch is actually
pretty cute,
317
00:12:52,931 --> 00:12:54,381
and he doesn'’t paint
dumb rocks.
318
00:12:54,379 --> 00:12:57,659
And I'’m pretty sure
I had another dream
319
00:12:57,655 --> 00:13:00,235
where I was married to a man
who can'’t eat spinach.
320
00:13:00,241 --> 00:13:01,791
So--
So where'’d you grow up?
321
00:13:01,793 --> 00:13:03,383
Wouldn'’t you like to know.
322
00:13:03,379 --> 00:13:05,659
Ow!
323
00:13:05,655 --> 00:13:07,235
[ both laugh ]
324
00:13:07,241 --> 00:13:09,211
Each tattoo is a prayer.
325
00:13:09,206 --> 00:13:11,136
Oh, my God,
I picked the wrong one!
326
00:13:11,137 --> 00:13:13,167
June. Bathroom now.
327
00:13:13,172 --> 00:13:15,172
- What?
- Excuse me.
328
00:13:15,172 --> 00:13:16,832
- Okay, come.
- Good-bye.
329
00:13:16,827 --> 00:13:19,447
We gotta switch guys.
330
00:13:19,448 --> 00:13:20,588
Wait, what?
331
00:13:20,586 --> 00:13:22,026
It'’s not for me,
it'’s for you.
332
00:13:22,034 --> 00:13:24,244
It'’s time for you
to move up the ladder.
333
00:13:24,241 --> 00:13:27,521
The ladder of men.
The sweetest ladder there is!
334
00:13:27,517 --> 00:13:29,517
- What are you talking about?
- Listen, cha-cha.
335
00:13:29,517 --> 00:13:31,897
We don'’t know how David'’s
gonna act on a date.
336
00:13:31,896 --> 00:13:35,446
We don'’t know if he'’s gonna
be romantic or cold.
337
00:13:35,448 --> 00:13:37,658
Or if he'’s gonna wanna
[ bleep ] you ASAP.
338
00:13:37,655 --> 00:13:41,685
You need to practice The Golden
Trio plus one on Tyler.
339
00:13:41,689 --> 00:13:44,379
Won'’t they be confused
if we switch midway
through the date?
340
00:13:44,379 --> 00:13:45,379
Who cares.
341
00:13:45,379 --> 00:13:46,859
But I thought you liked Tyler.
342
00:13:46,862 --> 00:13:49,032
- You said
he was your perfect man.
- Yeah.
343
00:13:49,034 --> 00:13:52,524
That'’s how much
I am sacrificing... for you.
344
00:13:52,517 --> 00:13:53,787
For me.
345
00:13:53,793 --> 00:13:55,763
Suspicious.
Okay. Yes.
346
00:13:55,758 --> 00:13:57,168
More practice is good.
347
00:13:57,172 --> 00:13:59,552
- Right.
- Tyler is my Everest.
348
00:13:59,551 --> 00:14:02,101
David is my Everest,
349
00:14:02,103 --> 00:14:05,693
but Tyler is my Kilimanjaro.
350
00:14:05,689 --> 00:14:07,209
And I'’m your camel, baby.
351
00:14:07,206 --> 00:14:09,306
- Let'’s go.
- Okay.
352
00:14:10,827 --> 00:14:12,097
Hello.
353
00:14:12,103 --> 00:14:13,453
- Hello.
- Hi.
354
00:14:13,448 --> 00:14:14,758
Why'’d you guys switch seats?
355
00:14:14,758 --> 00:14:16,208
- We had a tampon emergency.
- Mm-hmm.
356
00:14:16,206 --> 00:14:19,206
Um, so, Mitch,
ask me anything.
357
00:14:19,206 --> 00:14:21,066
Uh... where'’s our food?
358
00:14:21,068 --> 00:14:23,238
Oh, what am I on now, smug?
359
00:14:23,241 --> 00:14:25,241
Sorry we took so long
in the bathroom.
360
00:14:25,241 --> 00:14:27,071
It takes me a while to
take my underwear off,
361
00:14:27,068 --> 00:14:29,448
'’cause my legs are so long.
362
00:14:29,448 --> 00:14:32,478
Gotta take '’em down
for days.
363
00:14:32,482 --> 00:14:35,662
You don'’t have to put
your underwear all the way
on the ground.
364
00:14:35,655 --> 00:14:37,715
[ whispers ]
I do.
365
00:14:37,724 --> 00:14:39,074
What am I insinuating?
366
00:14:39,068 --> 00:14:41,688
That my vagina is really long?
367
00:14:41,689 --> 00:14:44,829
More smug, be really smug.
368
00:14:44,827 --> 00:14:46,407
I'’m not afraid of death!
369
00:14:46,413 --> 00:14:48,243
Huh.
370
00:14:48,241 --> 00:14:51,281
Lack of fear
for one'’s mortality
371
00:14:51,275 --> 00:14:54,995
is literally the most attractive
quality a female can possess.
372
00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:58,000
Well, I'’ve got it in spades.
373
00:14:58,000 --> 00:14:59,550
I don'’t.
374
00:14:59,551 --> 00:15:02,141
And so then I had this teacher
in second grade,
375
00:15:02,137 --> 00:15:04,587
Mrs. Harrington,
who was a real bitch.
376
00:15:04,586 --> 00:15:06,586
And so I wanted to, like,
punch her in the face
377
00:15:06,586 --> 00:15:09,206
at one point in my life,
but I didn'’t do it.
378
00:15:09,206 --> 00:15:11,336
I just asked you
where you went to school.
379
00:15:11,344 --> 00:15:12,934
Like for college.
380
00:15:12,931 --> 00:15:16,381
Oh! Like, I thought you meant
like the whole story.
381
00:15:16,379 --> 00:15:18,379
- But anyway--
- Yeah, I just asked you
where you went.
382
00:15:18,379 --> 00:15:20,409
- Never mind.
- This chump.
383
00:15:20,413 --> 00:15:23,693
Sorry if the riveting tales of my youth bore you.
384
00:15:23,689 --> 00:15:27,029
Yeah, in high school I used
to summer in Sancerre.
385
00:15:27,034 --> 00:15:29,524
That'’s in France.
386
00:15:29,517 --> 00:15:31,787
- I, uh, I have relatives there.
- What?
387
00:15:31,793 --> 00:15:35,933
You didn'’t tell me that.
I always thought
you were Irish... nerd.
388
00:15:35,931 --> 00:15:38,281
Well,
I'’m a fascinating person.
389
00:15:38,275 --> 00:15:40,135
Fancy, French relatives.
390
00:15:40,137 --> 00:15:41,517
I have never been to France,
391
00:15:41,517 --> 00:15:43,617
but I always wanted
to live in Montmartre.
392
00:15:43,620 --> 00:15:46,100
- [ French accent ] Montmartre.
- Mon-martre.
393
00:15:46,103 --> 00:15:48,173
[ French accent ]
Montmartre.
394
00:15:48,172 --> 00:15:49,412
I don'’t know
how you'’re saying it.
395
00:15:49,413 --> 00:15:51,213
[ French accent ]
Montmartre.
396
00:15:51,206 --> 00:15:52,896
[ French accent ]
Montmartre.
397
00:15:52,896 --> 00:15:54,446
It'’s a very guttural
language.
398
00:15:54,448 --> 00:15:57,208
- Okay.
- You know, use the back
of your throat a lot.
399
00:15:57,206 --> 00:15:58,856
Where'’s your favorite place
you'’re ever been?
400
00:15:58,862 --> 00:16:01,212
June'’s having a blast
with Tyler.
401
00:16:01,206 --> 00:16:02,686
Maybe I didn'’t pick
the wrong one.
402
00:16:02,689 --> 00:16:05,309
I just should'’ve
Golden Trio-ed him.
403
00:16:05,310 --> 00:16:07,310
What is a blood oath
anyway?
404
00:16:07,310 --> 00:16:09,720
Okay, June, hit it.
405
00:16:09,724 --> 00:16:12,484
Nice and easy.
406
00:16:12,482 --> 00:16:14,072
Wow!
407
00:16:14,068 --> 00:16:15,338
You have a pretty smile.
408
00:16:15,344 --> 00:16:17,214
[ high-pitched humming ]
409
00:16:18,862 --> 00:16:21,452
My God, it'’s beautiful!
410
00:16:21,448 --> 00:16:23,478
What is--
What is that sound?
411
00:16:23,482 --> 00:16:25,142
That sound? What sound?
[ high-pitched humming ]
412
00:16:25,137 --> 00:16:27,277
Am I having an aneurysm?
413
00:16:27,275 --> 00:16:29,965
I heard aneurysms are
an aphrodisiac.
414
00:16:29,965 --> 00:16:32,655
[ high-pitched humming ]
415
00:16:32,655 --> 00:16:34,445
Hey.
416
00:16:34,448 --> 00:16:36,618
[ both high-pitched humming ]
417
00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:37,790
What are you doing?
418
00:16:37,793 --> 00:16:39,833
I'’m supposed to be SMUMing Tyler.
419
00:16:39,827 --> 00:16:41,657
I'’ve changed my mind, June.
420
00:16:41,655 --> 00:16:45,655
Read my thoughts
through my eyes
and my SMUM.
421
00:16:45,655 --> 00:16:48,655
Okay, now I'’m totally confused.
422
00:16:48,655 --> 00:16:51,135
- Kat, your tampon needs you!
- What?
423
00:16:56,827 --> 00:16:58,827
What are you doing?
424
00:16:58,827 --> 00:17:00,237
You did so great!
425
00:17:00,241 --> 00:17:02,141
You SMUMed like a boss
426
00:17:02,137 --> 00:17:04,717
and you never mentioned
your hormonal imbalance once.
427
00:17:04,724 --> 00:17:06,554
I know.
I mentioned it twice.
428
00:17:06,551 --> 00:17:08,761
So now you can switch back.
429
00:17:08,758 --> 00:17:10,098
No! No!
430
00:17:10,103 --> 00:17:12,313
We'’re not switching back.
That is insane!
431
00:17:12,310 --> 00:17:13,860
I need more time
with Kilimanjaro.
432
00:17:13,862 --> 00:17:15,212
No, baby.
433
00:17:15,206 --> 00:17:17,206
You were on the trio
long enough.
434
00:17:17,206 --> 00:17:18,826
Now it'’s time to jump off
Kilimanjaro.
435
00:17:18,827 --> 00:17:21,757
and re-ascend mount--
436
00:17:21,758 --> 00:17:23,548
Damn it, what'’s another mountain?
437
00:17:23,551 --> 00:17:25,281
She can'’t think
of another mountain.
438
00:17:25,275 --> 00:17:27,855
She loves that I can'’t think
of another mountain.
439
00:17:27,862 --> 00:17:30,032
Okay, we'’re not switching back,
that'’s too weird.
440
00:17:30,034 --> 00:17:31,284
You have to! Okay?
441
00:17:31,275 --> 00:17:33,095
I knew Tyler was the one
all along,
442
00:17:33,103 --> 00:17:35,073
but now I knew it,
know it.
443
00:17:35,068 --> 00:17:36,718
In my heart, in my bones...
444
00:17:36,724 --> 00:17:38,694
- Okay.
- ...in my ovaries. Okay?
445
00:17:38,689 --> 00:17:41,209
I gotta go full rug, tug,
and smug on this,
and you can'’t stop me.
446
00:17:41,206 --> 00:17:42,616
I don'’t care.
447
00:17:42,620 --> 00:17:44,860
Okay, we'’ll get one more.
Mark my words.
448
00:17:44,862 --> 00:17:47,282
Unless I change my mind
and my word.
449
00:17:49,379 --> 00:17:51,619
Yes!
450
00:17:57,413 --> 00:17:59,863
Okay, this feels right.
451
00:17:59,862 --> 00:18:01,172
Tyler.
452
00:18:01,172 --> 00:18:02,832
So, June,
do you like spinoffs?
453
00:18:02,827 --> 00:18:05,237
Oh, don'’t get me started
on "Joey."
454
00:18:05,241 --> 00:18:07,101
- How are those nachos?
- So good!
455
00:18:07,103 --> 00:18:08,663
You know, I thought pork was out
456
00:18:08,655 --> 00:18:10,995
'’cause people realize
how smart pigs are, but--
457
00:18:11,000 --> 00:18:13,280
- Oh, no, we'’re in a pig
renaissance.
- That'’s exactly the word
458
00:18:13,275 --> 00:18:16,375
I was gonna use.
That'’s crazy!
459
00:18:16,379 --> 00:18:18,139
- [ chuckles ]
- [ high-pitched humming ]
460
00:18:18,137 --> 00:18:19,447
What are you doing?
461
00:18:19,448 --> 00:18:21,238
Are you into the waitress now?
462
00:18:21,241 --> 00:18:24,031
Maybe.
[ high-pitched humming ]
463
00:18:24,034 --> 00:18:25,724
Wait a minute.
464
00:18:25,724 --> 00:18:28,414
Every time I talk to someone,
you have to butt in.
465
00:18:28,413 --> 00:18:31,623
David, the twins, Tyler,
Mitch, the waitress.
466
00:18:31,620 --> 00:18:33,620
You'’re not trying
to get their attention.
467
00:18:33,620 --> 00:18:34,970
You'’re trying to get mine.
468
00:18:34,965 --> 00:18:36,785
That'’s ridiculous.
Is that ridiculous?
469
00:18:36,793 --> 00:18:39,143
Any time I have any sort
of connection with someone
470
00:18:39,137 --> 00:18:40,967
you have to break it up.
471
00:18:40,965 --> 00:18:42,755
Oh, please, like I care.
472
00:18:42,758 --> 00:18:45,028
You want me all
to yourself.
473
00:18:45,034 --> 00:18:46,624
I most certainly do not.
474
00:18:46,620 --> 00:18:48,480
You'’re obsessed with me.
475
00:18:48,482 --> 00:18:49,832
- I am not obsessed with you.
- Yeah.
476
00:18:49,827 --> 00:18:52,337
The only person I'’m obsessed
with is Tyler.
477
00:18:52,344 --> 00:18:53,864
He'’s my dream man.
478
00:18:53,862 --> 00:18:55,102
[ nervous chuckle ]
479
00:18:55,103 --> 00:18:56,933
Mm, ugly rock.
480
00:18:58,379 --> 00:19:00,829
Mm. Mm. Mm!
481
00:19:01,862 --> 00:19:03,242
- [ screams ]
- [ groans ]
482
00:19:03,241 --> 00:19:05,481
- Kat!
- Holy shit!
483
00:19:05,482 --> 00:19:07,032
Oh, why would the [ bleep ]
you do that?
484
00:19:07,034 --> 00:19:09,724
I'’m so sorry. I just was trying
to do a playful tug.
485
00:19:09,724 --> 00:19:12,594
You cannot handle
The Golden Trio!
486
00:19:12,586 --> 00:19:13,616
Shut up.
487
00:19:13,620 --> 00:19:15,210
I can fix it, I can fix it.
488
00:19:15,206 --> 00:19:18,136
- [ groans ]
- Oh, my God!
489
00:19:18,137 --> 00:19:20,237
[ screams ]
490
00:19:21,896 --> 00:19:24,446
- Why are you all--
- Sorry.
491
00:19:25,379 --> 00:19:27,689
Everything makes sense now.
492
00:19:27,689 --> 00:19:30,479
I mean, I knew I was lovable,
but this lovable?
493
00:19:30,482 --> 00:19:32,002
June, this isn'’t about you.
494
00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:35,030
- This is about my sweet
baby boy.
- [ grunts ]
495
00:19:35,034 --> 00:19:37,004
I know I'’m a solitary being,
496
00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:39,860
but if you ever wanna
hang out sometime with me
497
00:19:39,862 --> 00:19:42,072
just say, "I need you."
498
00:19:42,068 --> 00:19:43,588
I don'’t need you.
499
00:19:43,586 --> 00:19:45,656
- All I need is Tyler.
- Please leave.
500
00:19:45,655 --> 00:19:48,585
Hey, how about for a special
treat tonight we go home,
501
00:19:48,586 --> 00:19:52,926
sit on the couch, and watch
"Handmaid'’s Tale" bloopers?
502
00:19:52,931 --> 00:19:56,341
Aunt Lydia does have
a great chortle.
503
00:19:56,344 --> 00:19:58,384
No.
504
00:19:58,379 --> 00:20:01,689
Okay, well,
I'’m gonna go do that then.
505
00:20:01,689 --> 00:20:03,519
June.
506
00:20:03,517 --> 00:20:05,277
Maybe I can call you
sometime?
507
00:20:06,206 --> 00:20:08,166
I'’m sorry, Mitch.
508
00:20:08,172 --> 00:20:11,242
You'’re not my mountain.
509
00:20:12,137 --> 00:20:13,757
But tomorrow,
510
00:20:13,758 --> 00:20:16,518
with the supplemental oxygen
of The Golden Trio,
511
00:20:16,517 --> 00:20:19,617
I will ascend Everest.
512
00:20:21,482 --> 00:20:24,412
All right, fine.
I'’m leaving now.
513
00:20:24,413 --> 00:20:26,933
But when the swelling
goes down...
514
00:20:26,931 --> 00:20:28,451
- [ gasps ]
- ...you know where to find me.
515
00:20:28,448 --> 00:20:30,548
[ whispers ]
Jesus Christ.
516
00:20:32,724 --> 00:20:35,834
Hey, hey, I want my rock back.
517
00:20:40,103 --> 00:20:41,623
This is it.
518
00:20:41,620 --> 00:20:43,550
I'’ve had my practice.
519
00:20:43,551 --> 00:20:45,311
I'’m a flirtation goddess.
520
00:20:45,310 --> 00:20:49,480
It'’s time to Golden Trio
plus one beautiful David.
521
00:20:49,482 --> 00:20:51,002
Well, well, well!
522
00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:52,830
Oh, hey.
523
00:20:52,827 --> 00:20:55,167
There'’s a gutter problem
you said?
524
00:20:55,172 --> 00:20:57,282
- I'’m sure of it.
- Cool.
525
00:20:57,275 --> 00:20:59,995
Well, since you'’re out here,
could you give me a hand?
526
00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:02,760
All right, June, The Trio.
527
00:21:02,758 --> 00:21:05,308
- I'’m pretty busy, but... okay.
- Oh.
528
00:21:05,310 --> 00:21:08,790
- Well, you know,
if it'’s a problem--
- Shut your mouth!
529
00:21:08,793 --> 00:21:11,903
I guess I can spare a second,
you old man.
530
00:21:11,896 --> 00:21:13,096
Oh, no!
531
00:21:13,103 --> 00:21:14,903
Okay.
532
00:21:14,896 --> 00:21:17,166
So, my ladder gets
a little wobbly.
533
00:21:17,172 --> 00:21:18,762
It helps if
someone holds it.
534
00:21:18,758 --> 00:21:21,068
Doesn'’t seem like
The Trio'’s working.
535
00:21:21,068 --> 00:21:22,338
Wait, what was it again?
536
00:21:22,344 --> 00:21:25,144
"Diss, Kiss, Piss"?
537
00:21:25,137 --> 00:21:28,307
You diss him, kiss him,
then piss on him?
538
00:21:28,310 --> 00:21:29,660
That can'’t be right.
539
00:21:29,655 --> 00:21:33,025
Okay, so just hold it steady
there, June.
540
00:21:33,034 --> 00:21:34,244
Tug! Tug!
541
00:21:34,241 --> 00:21:35,901
One was definitely tug!
542
00:21:35,896 --> 00:21:37,136
- No.
- Ha-ha, playful!
543
00:21:37,137 --> 00:21:39,097
No, no. Hold it steady.
544
00:21:39,103 --> 00:21:40,833
- Careful, careful!
- What are you scared
you'’re gonna fall...
545
00:21:40,827 --> 00:21:43,137
- Um, a little bit.
- ...and leave your kids alone?
546
00:21:43,137 --> 00:21:45,897
Oh no! That was bad,
that was very bad!
547
00:21:45,896 --> 00:21:48,336
It looks like someone clogged
these up on purpose.
548
00:21:48,344 --> 00:21:50,214
- I don'’t know why.
- Hey, guys.
549
00:21:50,206 --> 00:21:51,896
Oh, thank God! Kat!
550
00:21:51,896 --> 00:21:55,026
Kat will interrupt and save me
with her stupid banter!
551
00:21:55,034 --> 00:21:56,524
June.
552
00:21:56,517 --> 00:21:58,857
Look at me giving June
her space.
553
00:21:58,862 --> 00:22:01,142
Take that, June.
I'’m not butting in.
554
00:22:01,137 --> 00:22:04,447
Butt in, Kat. Butt in.
You always butt in.
555
00:22:06,172 --> 00:22:08,072
No!
39777
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