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MAN:* "I can't go on" The old man said *
2
00:00:50,751 --> 00:00:54,588
* There's a rat
Inside me house *
3
00:00:54,588 --> 00:00:56,790
* The little girl laughed *
4
00:00:56,790 --> 00:01:03,997
* Said, "Don't be daft
It's only a pink sugar mouse" *
5
00:01:03,997 --> 00:01:07,268
That's how it was.
6
00:01:07,268 --> 00:01:09,637
* Sometimes *
7
00:01:09,637 --> 00:01:13,441
* It wasn't half as bad
As all that *
8
00:01:13,441 --> 00:01:17,878
* Sometimes *
9
00:01:17,878 --> 00:01:23,050
* Don't know
Exactly what we had *
10
00:01:23,050 --> 00:01:26,120
* But there were fun times *
11
00:01:39,066 --> 00:01:43,471
GIRL: Nine Elms is the name
of a place in London
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00:01:43,471 --> 00:01:45,773
south of the river.
13
00:01:45,773 --> 00:01:48,776
There might have been
nine trees there once,
14
00:01:48,776 --> 00:01:51,679
but the time we're talking about,
15
00:01:51,679 --> 00:01:56,750
Nine Elms didn't mean trees,
it meant foggy winter,
16
00:01:56,750 --> 00:02:00,921
the noise of trains, but most of all,
17
00:02:00,921 --> 00:02:05,959
it meant Sam,
the first to show us the world
18
00:02:05,959 --> 00:02:08,629
on the other side of the river.
19
00:02:58,145 --> 00:03:03,016
Bella, come here. Come here.
20
00:03:03,016 --> 00:03:04,885
Come here.
21
00:03:18,399 --> 00:03:21,068
Ten years, teach you how to do one trick
22
00:03:21,068 --> 00:03:22,670
and can't bloody do it.
23
00:03:28,108 --> 00:03:31,812
MAN:* It's strange how
Miss Kelly I first came to meet *
24
00:03:31,812 --> 00:03:34,214
* I were riding one day
On my bus *
25
00:03:34,214 --> 00:03:37,184
* I tried to alight
Without paying me fare *
26
00:03:37,184 --> 00:03:39,787
* The conductor kicked up
Such a fuss *
27
00:03:39,787 --> 00:03:42,189
* I tried to step
On the curb *
28
00:03:42,189 --> 00:03:44,892
* When the horses dust up
To me grief *
29
00:03:44,892 --> 00:03:47,661
* I fell and I'm sure
That I'd broke me neck *
30
00:03:47,661 --> 00:03:51,499
* But Miss Kelly
Was there underneath *
31
00:04:11,084 --> 00:04:14,522
WOMAN:"It's all right for you,
"I said. Health inspectors.
32
00:04:14,522 --> 00:04:16,790
"Then where do you live?"
I said.
33
00:04:16,790 --> 00:04:17,825
So I told him.
34
00:04:17,825 --> 00:04:19,427
Where I live, it's so damp
35
00:04:19,427 --> 00:04:21,429
you can grow mushrooms on the walls.
36
00:04:21,429 --> 00:04:22,730
You shouldn't have told him, love.
37
00:04:22,730 --> 00:04:24,398
He'll put your bleeping rent up.
38
00:04:24,398 --> 00:04:25,899
Up them and all.
39
00:04:25,899 --> 00:04:27,401
( all laugh )
40
00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:31,539
( cheerful theme playing )
41
00:04:36,710 --> 00:04:39,012
Here you are. Thanks, pay you tomorrow.
42
00:04:39,012 --> 00:04:41,549
Okay. See you later.
43
00:04:52,526 --> 00:04:54,895
( toy horn squeaks )
44
00:05:21,855 --> 00:05:23,557
Ow! Stupid cow.
45
00:05:23,557 --> 00:05:25,359
Wanna put that in the accident book, mate.
46
00:05:25,359 --> 00:05:26,660
Screw the accident book.
47
00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:27,861
Yeah, I may have to soon
48
00:05:27,861 --> 00:05:29,797
if the old woman don't give in.
49
00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:43,811
God bless you. God bless you.
God bless you.
50
00:05:52,520 --> 00:05:54,087
Thank you very much, love.
51
00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:57,925
* Sometimes *
52
00:05:57,925 --> 00:06:00,994
* It wasn't half as bad
As all that *
53
00:06:00,994 --> 00:06:03,931
* Sometimes *
54
00:06:03,931 --> 00:06:08,536
* Don't know
Just what it was we had *
55
00:06:08,536 --> 00:06:12,105
* But there were fun times *
56
00:06:14,074 --> 00:06:16,677
Don't annoy the dog, sonny.
She'll pee all over you.
57
00:06:17,911 --> 00:06:19,680
* Sometimes *
58
00:06:19,680 --> 00:06:22,382
* It wasn't half as bad
As all that *
59
00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:24,852
* Sometimes *
60
00:06:24,852 --> 00:06:28,456
* Don't know exactly
What we had *
61
00:06:28,456 --> 00:06:32,059
* But there were fun times *
62
00:06:32,660 --> 00:06:34,895
* Sometimes *
63
00:06:34,895 --> 00:06:39,433
* She made me feel important
Only sometimes *
64
00:06:40,801 --> 00:06:43,937
What are you staring at? You.
65
00:06:46,774 --> 00:06:50,143
Oh. God bless you, sir.
66
00:06:50,143 --> 00:06:51,779
* Sometimes *
67
00:06:51,779 --> 00:06:54,147
* It wasn't half as bad
As all that *
68
00:06:54,147 --> 00:06:58,118
* Sometimes *
69
00:06:59,419 --> 00:07:01,088
Come on.
70
00:07:03,457 --> 00:07:04,892
* Don't know *
71
00:07:04,892 --> 00:07:06,159
Home.
72
00:07:06,159 --> 00:07:08,696
( children chattering indistinctly )
73
00:07:15,268 --> 00:07:17,905
Want an apple? Well, wipe
your nose and get a jackal.
74
00:07:29,617 --> 00:07:32,052
Where's Dad? Overtime.
75
00:07:32,052 --> 00:07:34,321
As always. We never see him, do we?
76
00:07:34,321 --> 00:07:35,523
Might as well be orphans.
77
00:07:35,523 --> 00:07:36,890
Don't ever say that.
78
00:07:36,890 --> 00:07:38,892
Don't ever let me hear you say that again.
79
00:07:38,892 --> 00:07:41,261
It's unlucky. Shut your ears, then.
80
00:07:41,261 --> 00:07:43,797
Well, don't just stand there. I'm not.
81
00:07:44,397 --> 00:07:48,969
Bella.
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00:07:48,969 --> 00:07:50,704
God bless you, sir. God bless you.
83
00:07:50,704 --> 00:07:54,708
Thank you very much.
Thank you very much. Thank you.
84
00:07:56,243 --> 00:07:59,713
Don't just stand there, do something.
85
00:08:03,684 --> 00:08:05,853
Silly sod.
86
00:08:13,694 --> 00:08:16,129
SAM ( reciting ): I once went to battle
And bravely I fought
87
00:08:16,129 --> 00:08:18,666
As a brave British soldier Should do
88
00:08:18,666 --> 00:08:23,203
Then Lord Nelson said
"Sam, our powder's run short"
89
00:08:23,203 --> 00:08:26,073
"So, of course We're depending on you"
90
00:08:26,073 --> 00:08:29,042
Thousands of Zulus Came gussing along
91
00:08:29,042 --> 00:08:31,444
And I pushed to the front And I said
92
00:08:31,444 --> 00:08:34,447
"If you boys don't go
I shall sing you a song"
93
00:08:34,447 --> 00:08:38,518
So they threw down their spears
And they fled
94
00:08:38,518 --> 00:08:40,721
( rimshot sounds )
95
00:08:48,328 --> 00:08:51,331
MUM: Please, Dad, once.
Give me a hand with this.
96
00:08:51,331 --> 00:08:53,166
DAD: I'd pay for it though, would I?
97
00:08:53,166 --> 00:08:56,303
MUM: I work twice as hard
doing that laundry.
98
00:08:56,303 --> 00:08:57,605
Money isn't everything.
99
00:08:57,605 --> 00:08:59,673
Gotta have a bit of a family life. A break.
100
00:08:59,673 --> 00:09:01,975
DAD: It might be nice to have
a break from your nagging.
101
00:09:01,975 --> 00:09:03,744
The way you talk,
anybody would think I was up
102
00:09:03,744 --> 00:09:07,615
at the bloody seaside for the day.
103
00:09:07,615 --> 00:09:12,319
MUM: Calls it work and talks
about football half the time.
104
00:09:12,319 --> 00:09:14,955
I thought I asked you to get
me some bread yesterday.
105
00:09:14,955 --> 00:09:16,023
I did.
106
00:09:16,023 --> 00:09:17,858
I didn't ask you to eat it all.
107
00:09:17,858 --> 00:09:19,359
Gonna have to get me some.
108
00:09:19,359 --> 00:09:22,796
And you, it's about time
you stop using that.
109
00:09:22,796 --> 00:09:24,732
He can use it for a goldfish bowl.
110
00:09:24,732 --> 00:09:25,933
Shut your mouth.
111
00:09:25,933 --> 00:09:27,400
Shut your own, it's closer.
112
00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:28,869
Not so much of it.
113
00:09:28,869 --> 00:09:31,138
Go and get yourself washed. Go on.
114
00:09:35,008 --> 00:09:37,144
MUM: Sometimes when I look at this lot.
115
00:09:37,144 --> 00:09:39,647
It might help if she was
a bit less free with her lip.
116
00:09:39,647 --> 00:09:42,415
DAD: Wonder which side
of the family she gets that from.
117
00:09:42,415 --> 00:09:45,518
GIRL: That Saturday began
as most Saturdays did,
118
00:09:45,518 --> 00:09:50,290
with them rowing about Dad
going off to work
119
00:09:50,290 --> 00:09:52,893
and Mum being left on her own with us.
120
00:09:52,893 --> 00:09:55,228
But overtime meant more money,
121
00:09:55,228 --> 00:09:57,397
and more money meant more chance
122
00:09:57,397 --> 00:10:00,467
of that new house
they were always talking about.
123
00:10:00,467 --> 00:10:03,603
MUM: Liz, your dad's left you
some money. It's on the table.
124
00:10:03,603 --> 00:10:06,506
Don't forget to clean your teeth.
125
00:10:06,506 --> 00:10:07,908
Blach!
126
00:10:16,884 --> 00:10:18,418
Hey, mister, who's dead?
127
00:10:18,418 --> 00:10:21,722
BOY: Nobody's dead, is there, mister?
128
00:10:23,190 --> 00:10:24,758
See, there's nothing wrong with her.
129
00:10:24,758 --> 00:10:26,393
She's just old, that's all.
130
00:10:33,233 --> 00:10:35,803
What you got?
131
00:10:39,372 --> 00:10:40,573
Half's mine.
132
00:10:40,573 --> 00:10:42,442
Who said? Our dad.
133
00:10:42,442 --> 00:10:43,643
Not here now, is he?
134
00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:45,746
He's working on a Saturday.
135
00:10:45,746 --> 00:10:49,049
LIZ: It he works every Saturday
and Sunday for a whole month,
136
00:10:49,049 --> 00:10:52,285
he could earn more money
than a whole year put together.
137
00:10:52,285 --> 00:10:55,188
You never think about that,
do you? You're too selfish.
138
00:10:55,188 --> 00:10:56,924
He said I can have one.
139
00:10:56,924 --> 00:11:00,293
Well, think about it.
140
00:11:00,293 --> 00:11:02,062
If you want a new set, someone's gotta pay
141
00:11:02,062 --> 00:11:03,931
for the curtains, ain't they?
142
00:11:03,931 --> 00:11:06,199
Not gonna be you, is it?
143
00:11:06,199 --> 00:11:08,769
He said that you should give me one.
144
00:11:08,769 --> 00:11:09,970
Here, want a sweet?
145
00:11:09,970 --> 00:11:12,706
Yeah. Sack you both.
146
00:11:14,041 --> 00:11:16,443
( emotive theme playing )
147
00:12:06,026 --> 00:12:07,360
BOY: It's that, then?
148
00:12:07,360 --> 00:12:11,198
That's where you said
we were going to live.
149
00:12:11,198 --> 00:12:18,772
BOY: With a room for you,
one for me and one for baby James.
150
00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:34,021
MAN: Hey, you!
What are you doing down there?
151
00:12:34,021 --> 00:12:35,989
Get out of here.
152
00:12:35,989 --> 00:12:37,390
( seagulls screeching )
153
00:12:37,390 --> 00:12:38,892
Mark!
154
00:12:43,530 --> 00:12:45,833
LIZ: Mark!
155
00:12:52,672 --> 00:12:54,174
LIZ: Mark!
156
00:12:58,745 --> 00:13:00,413
Mark!
157
00:13:09,189 --> 00:13:12,725
Mark!
158
00:13:12,725 --> 00:13:15,462
LIZ: Come out! Mark!
159
00:13:23,470 --> 00:13:25,038
Mark!
160
00:13:25,605 --> 00:13:26,806
Mark!
161
00:13:26,806 --> 00:13:31,111
Here, go on. Out. Private.
162
00:13:35,248 --> 00:13:38,218
Can't you hear? I said it's private.
163
00:13:38,218 --> 00:13:41,554
SAM: Stay out. Keep out.
164
00:13:41,554 --> 00:13:43,123
( Mark whistles )
165
00:13:43,123 --> 00:13:45,658
MARK ( sing-song ):
* Sam, Sam, the dirty old man *
166
00:13:45,658 --> 00:13:47,861
What are you doing, kid?
I said, "Keep out. "
167
00:13:47,861 --> 00:13:51,098
Now, stay out of here.
It's not Dr. Bernardo's home.
168
00:13:51,098 --> 00:13:57,337
Stay away. Private property. It's mine.
169
00:13:57,337 --> 00:13:59,406
Stay out.
170
00:14:02,442 --> 00:14:04,912
Cheeky little beggar. Go on. Off.
171
00:14:04,912 --> 00:14:06,713
SAM: Both of you.
172
00:14:06,713 --> 00:14:09,950
Stay out. Stay out of here.
173
00:14:12,785 --> 00:14:17,991
Go on, I'll give you
a right bonk with this.
174
00:14:20,727 --> 00:14:22,129
Go on. In the house.
175
00:14:26,599 --> 00:14:28,601
Go on.
176
00:14:28,601 --> 00:14:30,770
Give a bitch half a bone,
she wants the gravy.
177
00:14:30,770 --> 00:14:32,973
MARK ( sing-song ):
* Sam, Sam, dirty old man *
178
00:14:32,973 --> 00:14:35,242
* Washed his face In a frying pan *
179
00:14:35,242 --> 00:14:38,178
( singing indistinctly )
Look, I'm warning you.
180
00:14:38,178 --> 00:14:40,380
Hey, mister, you're a barmy.
181
00:14:40,380 --> 00:14:42,782
If you've not left in five seconds,
182
00:14:42,782 --> 00:14:45,752
I'd be a right fartly one
and drop you over the side.
183
00:14:45,752 --> 00:14:47,287
There's no water.
184
00:14:47,287 --> 00:14:49,923
Don't count on it. Anyway, it's private.
185
00:14:49,923 --> 00:14:52,525
It's not. Then wipe your nose.
186
00:14:52,525 --> 00:14:54,527
It's not private. It is, it's mine.
187
00:14:54,527 --> 00:14:57,097
Who said? I said. It's mine.
188
00:14:57,097 --> 00:14:59,933
It's private. Can't you talk English?
189
00:14:59,933 --> 00:15:03,536
Bloody kids. You can have midgets anytime,
190
00:15:03,536 --> 00:15:05,472
they don't grow up, do they?
191
00:15:05,472 --> 00:15:07,607
MARK: Hey, mister, when they
gonna pull your house down?
192
00:15:07,607 --> 00:15:09,409
Better hurry up before it falls down.
193
00:15:09,409 --> 00:15:10,610
( slams door )
194
00:15:13,046 --> 00:15:15,115
Want to go?
195
00:15:16,783 --> 00:15:18,051
LIZ: Bet he was in a circus.
196
00:15:18,051 --> 00:15:19,252
MARK: Bet he wasn't.
197
00:15:19,252 --> 00:15:21,321
LIZ: Bet his dog was.
198
00:15:30,130 --> 00:15:32,265
Hey, mister, can we come in
and see your house?
199
00:15:32,265 --> 00:15:34,367
Can we look at your house, mister?
200
00:15:34,367 --> 00:15:37,237
Bet you got nothing in there.
201
00:15:37,237 --> 00:15:39,206
Hey, mister, you're a barmy.
202
00:15:39,206 --> 00:15:43,710
Here, out. Out. This is private property.
203
00:15:43,710 --> 00:15:45,812
I told you, stay out.
204
00:15:45,812 --> 00:15:47,947
( sing-song )
* See my fingers See my thumb *
205
00:15:47,947 --> 00:15:49,949
* You come in here And I'll kick your bum *
206
00:15:49,949 --> 00:15:52,552
Go on. Out now, both of you. Out. Out.
207
00:15:52,552 --> 00:15:54,387
( sing-song )* Sam, Sam The dirty old man *
208
00:15:54,387 --> 00:15:57,590
* Washed his face In a frying pan *
209
00:15:57,590 --> 00:15:58,791
Hang about.
210
00:15:58,791 --> 00:16:00,060
Look at this.
211
00:16:00,060 --> 00:16:02,495
Here, mate, your wheels are going round.
212
00:16:02,495 --> 00:16:05,432
I know, they do a lovely turn.
213
00:16:05,432 --> 00:16:07,534
Hey, darling.
Didn't your mom every tell you
214
00:16:07,534 --> 00:16:09,169
about dirty old men like him?
215
00:16:09,169 --> 00:16:11,738
Told me about you.
216
00:16:11,738 --> 00:16:14,341
Hey, mister, you've got
a hole in your trousers.
217
00:16:14,341 --> 00:16:17,544
Hey, mister, your shirt's hanging out.
218
00:16:17,544 --> 00:16:21,714
Off. Go on, get off.
219
00:16:21,714 --> 00:16:23,116
You're pests.
220
00:16:26,853 --> 00:16:29,256
( announcer speaking
indistinctly over speakers )
221
00:16:37,097 --> 00:16:39,299
( man speaking indistinctly )
222
00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:57,150
Hey, move along, son.
You're ruining the act.
223
00:16:57,150 --> 00:16:58,618
There's a good lad. Heh, heh, heh.
224
00:16:58,618 --> 00:17:01,121
Now you've done it. Yeah? Get off.
225
00:17:01,121 --> 00:17:02,622
If you want.
226
00:17:06,093 --> 00:17:09,562
All right, all right.
227
00:17:09,562 --> 00:17:11,298
SAM: Here's a lovely little song
228
00:17:11,298 --> 00:17:13,366
that I have dedicated to the ladies,
229
00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:15,202
and that I've entitled:
230
00:17:15,202 --> 00:17:17,437
"No Matter How Long Your Stockings Are,
231
00:17:17,437 --> 00:17:22,809
The Tops Are Always Nearest The Bottom. "
232
00:17:22,809 --> 00:17:26,946
* La-dee-da-dee-dum
La-dee-da-dee-da *
233
00:17:26,946 --> 00:17:32,485
* Da-dee-da-dee-da-dee-dum
La-dee-da-dee-dum *
234
00:17:32,485 --> 00:17:40,560
* Oh, they used To call her Mary *
235
00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:46,999
* But then they took The R away *
236
00:17:46,999 --> 00:17:53,340
* Oh, she wanted to be
A flapper, you see *
237
00:17:53,340 --> 00:17:58,945
* With a cute little name
Like May *
238
00:17:58,945 --> 00:18:06,286
* And then a young man
Came romancing *
239
00:18:06,286 --> 00:18:12,192
* And in a year
They called him "Pa" *
240
00:18:12,192 --> 00:18:18,965
* So they took the Y
Away from May *
241
00:18:18,965 --> 00:18:22,969
* And now they call her Ma *
242
00:18:22,969 --> 00:18:25,505
( tempo increases )
243
00:18:25,505 --> 00:18:30,343
* Oh, they used
To call her Mary *
244
00:18:30,343 --> 00:18:33,646
* And then they took
The R away *
245
00:18:33,646 --> 00:18:37,650
* Oh, she wanted to be
A flapper, you see *
246
00:18:37,650 --> 00:18:41,954
* With a cute little name
Like May *
247
00:18:41,954 --> 00:18:46,226
* And then a young man
Came romancing *
248
00:18:46,226 --> 00:18:49,762
* And in a year
They called him "Pa" *
249
00:18:49,762 --> 00:18:54,000
* So they took the Y
Away from May *
250
00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:56,469
* And now they call her *
251
00:18:56,469 --> 00:18:58,438
* What do they call her? *
252
00:18:58,438 --> 00:19:02,309
* Yes, they all call her "Ma" *
253
00:19:21,461 --> 00:19:24,397
We don't know our way home, mister.
254
00:19:37,176 --> 00:19:39,646
They followed us here,
255
00:19:39,646 --> 00:19:41,948
they can follow us back, I suppose.
256
00:19:52,091 --> 00:19:55,362
SAM: Here, you hold there.
257
00:20:27,794 --> 00:20:28,828
What's he up to?
258
00:20:28,828 --> 00:20:31,163
Earwigging. Listening inside his head.
259
00:20:31,163 --> 00:20:34,301
Oh. Empty bells and cockleshells.
260
00:20:34,301 --> 00:20:38,938
Here you are. Now, don't say
I never give you naught.
261
00:20:38,938 --> 00:20:41,173
What's in it?
262
00:20:41,173 --> 00:20:42,942
What's in it?
263
00:20:42,942 --> 00:20:45,211
You should be grateful.
264
00:20:45,211 --> 00:20:47,914
If I had an house, a nice big house,
265
00:20:47,914 --> 00:20:50,283
I know what I'd do.
266
00:20:50,283 --> 00:20:52,118
I'd have a cat and I'd have a dog
267
00:20:52,118 --> 00:20:55,087
with a bloody, fine view.
268
00:20:55,087 --> 00:20:57,657
Thanks, mister.
269
00:21:06,333 --> 00:21:08,167
That's not funny.
270
00:21:08,167 --> 00:21:10,503
No, but it's clean.
271
00:21:15,642 --> 00:21:18,144
MARK: This a picnic, mister? SAM: Aye.
272
00:21:18,144 --> 00:21:20,613
It isn't. A picnic's
gotta be in the country.
273
00:21:20,613 --> 00:21:22,248
Oh, aye, who told you that?
274
00:21:22,248 --> 00:21:23,950
Our dad.
275
00:21:23,950 --> 00:21:25,652
Did he? Yeah.
276
00:21:25,652 --> 00:21:28,154
A picnic's gotta have flowers and grass.
277
00:21:28,154 --> 00:21:30,957
Oh, what else did he say, your dad?
278
00:21:30,957 --> 00:21:34,627
Tell an apple from an onion
because he's always crying?
279
00:21:34,627 --> 00:21:37,229
A picnic's where you're enjoying it.
280
00:21:37,229 --> 00:21:38,998
You enjoying it?
281
00:21:38,998 --> 00:21:42,134
Right, then, it's a picnic.
A picnic's a flaming picnic.
282
00:21:42,134 --> 00:21:43,570
It's not.
283
00:21:43,570 --> 00:21:45,605
That's a rude word. Use your handkerchief.
284
00:21:45,605 --> 00:21:50,743
Coughs and sneezes spread diseases.
285
00:21:50,743 --> 00:21:53,145
Charming manner that child's got.
286
00:21:53,145 --> 00:21:54,681
Charming.
287
00:21:54,681 --> 00:21:56,248
Like that fella that lived next door.
288
00:21:56,248 --> 00:21:59,318
Spent all day teaching himself
how to be a brass band.
289
00:21:59,318 --> 00:22:00,720
Funny thing, he played the fiddle.
290
00:22:00,720 --> 00:22:03,022
( boat whistle blows )
291
00:22:05,692 --> 00:22:08,027
What's he doing, earwigging again?
292
00:22:08,027 --> 00:22:10,430
It's all inside here, you know.
293
00:22:12,365 --> 00:22:14,601
Don't you know that?
294
00:22:14,601 --> 00:22:16,903
Inside your head, you can build...
295
00:22:16,903 --> 00:22:19,539
A skyscraper?
296
00:22:19,539 --> 00:22:24,276
Aye. Ah... A palace. A what?
297
00:22:24,276 --> 00:22:25,478
An apple?
298
00:22:25,478 --> 00:22:27,046
An orange.
299
00:22:27,046 --> 00:22:28,881
A steamboat? The lot.
300
00:22:28,881 --> 00:22:30,349
If you think with your eyeballs
301
00:22:30,349 --> 00:22:32,419
and forget all that rot from teachers
302
00:22:32,419 --> 00:22:35,087
and fathers and mothers and cops.
303
00:22:35,087 --> 00:22:38,425
Magic. It's private. It's yours.
304
00:22:38,425 --> 00:22:40,192
It's not. Here.
305
00:22:40,192 --> 00:22:43,362
I told you that's a rude word.
Use your handkerchief.
306
00:22:54,340 --> 00:22:56,476
What you playing?
307
00:22:56,476 --> 00:22:57,977
It's private.
308
00:23:04,551 --> 00:23:06,719
* Jimin-oh, golly
Gosh, oh, gee *
309
00:23:06,719 --> 00:23:09,055
* I've fallen in love
And so has she *
310
00:23:09,055 --> 00:23:11,658
* I haven't told her
Hasn't told me *
311
00:23:11,658 --> 00:23:14,026
* But we know it
Just the same *
312
00:23:14,026 --> 00:23:16,996
* Saturday night
On her settee *
313
00:23:16,996 --> 00:23:18,798
* Oh, what a time
It's going to be *
314
00:23:18,798 --> 00:23:21,534
* I haven't told her
Hasn't told me *
315
00:23:21,534 --> 00:23:24,437
* But we know it
Just the same *
316
00:23:24,437 --> 00:23:28,808
* She still
Calls me "mister" *
317
00:23:28,808 --> 00:23:31,744
* But she won't I know she won't *
318
00:23:31,744 --> 00:23:33,913
* After I've kissed her *
319
00:23:33,913 --> 00:23:36,248
* I've got an idea
Soon she'll be *
320
00:23:36,248 --> 00:23:38,618
* Cooking my breakfast
Wait and see *
321
00:23:38,618 --> 00:23:41,053
* I haven't told her
Hasn't told me *
322
00:23:41,053 --> 00:23:43,456
* But we know it
Just the same *
323
00:23:44,423 --> 00:23:49,395
* She still
Calls me "mi-- " *
324
00:23:49,395 --> 00:23:52,499
Hey. Hey, up.
325
00:23:59,506 --> 00:24:00,940
Hey, up.
326
00:24:16,523 --> 00:24:19,258
Funerals are like a stab in the back.
327
00:24:19,258 --> 00:24:22,061
Don't know you've got it
till you've had it.
328
00:24:22,061 --> 00:24:23,563
Wasn't much.
329
00:24:23,563 --> 00:24:25,932
Oh, aye. Suppose you'll have a better one.
330
00:24:25,932 --> 00:24:28,467
Better one than yours anyway.
331
00:24:28,467 --> 00:24:30,036
Happens to all of us, you know?
332
00:24:30,036 --> 00:24:32,004
What?
333
00:24:32,004 --> 00:24:34,073
Being born.
334
00:24:39,846 --> 00:24:44,917
What's his name, mister? What's his name?
335
00:24:44,917 --> 00:24:46,418
He hasn't got a name.
336
00:24:46,418 --> 00:24:47,687
Why, mister?
337
00:24:47,687 --> 00:24:48,888
'Cause he's an her.
338
00:24:48,888 --> 00:24:50,857
What's her name, mister?
339
00:24:50,857 --> 00:24:54,060
Bella. "Bella" is Italian for "beautiful. "
340
00:24:54,060 --> 00:24:56,829
Bet she won't ever. Won't what?
341
00:24:57,530 --> 00:25:00,199
Ever get dead.
342
00:25:00,199 --> 00:25:02,301
If it takes a week to walk a fortnight,
343
00:25:02,301 --> 00:25:04,436
how many apples in a barrel of grapes?
344
00:25:04,436 --> 00:25:05,638
Will she, mister?
345
00:25:05,638 --> 00:25:09,108
What? Have a big funeral.
346
00:25:09,108 --> 00:25:11,811
Bigger than Queen Victoria's?
347
00:25:11,811 --> 00:25:14,213
Bigger than Mr. Potter's at the barbers?
348
00:25:14,213 --> 00:25:19,218
Mr. Potter won't know he's deceased. Ha!
349
00:25:19,218 --> 00:25:21,854
Will she have flowers?
350
00:25:21,854 --> 00:25:24,824
Oh, I should say so.
351
00:25:24,824 --> 00:25:29,261
Feathers and trumpets,
black horses, brass bands.
352
00:25:29,261 --> 00:25:32,464
They'll all be there
for our Bella. Heh, heh.
353
00:25:32,464 --> 00:25:33,766
In the middle of Hyde Park
354
00:25:33,766 --> 00:25:35,868
in the biggest cemetery in the world.
355
00:25:35,868 --> 00:25:38,605
You gotta do it in style, you see.
356
00:25:38,605 --> 00:25:42,074
I mean, having a good funeral
is like having a good life.
357
00:25:42,074 --> 00:25:45,311
Something to look forward to, you see.
358
00:25:45,311 --> 00:25:47,546
I mean, you've got to let people know
359
00:25:47,546 --> 00:25:50,549
when you've gone.
360
00:25:50,549 --> 00:25:51,951
'Course I've seen it, you know.
361
00:25:51,951 --> 00:25:53,452
It's in the middle of Hyde Park.
362
00:25:53,452 --> 00:25:54,921
Towering tombstones.
363
00:25:54,921 --> 00:25:57,456
Undertakers with hats as tall as chimneys.
364
00:25:57,456 --> 00:25:59,692
"Come in," they'd say.
"Come in and have a lie down
365
00:25:59,692 --> 00:26:03,162
"if you've naught else to do. "
366
00:26:03,162 --> 00:26:05,564
Oh, aye. You've got to be a special dog
367
00:26:05,564 --> 00:26:07,466
to be buried there.
368
00:26:07,466 --> 00:26:09,368
Is Bella a special dog?
369
00:26:09,368 --> 00:26:10,803
Is she a special dog?
370
00:26:10,803 --> 00:26:12,238
What are you talking about?
371
00:26:12,238 --> 00:26:16,042
I've told you, "bella" is
Italian for "beautiful. "
372
00:26:16,042 --> 00:26:19,979
Mark my words, they'll
remember Bella in Hyde Park
373
00:26:19,979 --> 00:26:23,783
when you and me are
long gone and forgotten.
374
00:26:23,783 --> 00:26:25,685
Can we come to the funeral, mister?
375
00:26:25,685 --> 00:26:27,053
Oh, aye, I dare say,
376
00:26:27,053 --> 00:26:29,989
Bella or me'll send you an invitation.
377
00:26:29,989 --> 00:26:32,925
She's a lady, you know,
she's got a pedigree and all that.
378
00:26:32,925 --> 00:26:35,795
You'll get invited. A card, you know.
379
00:26:35,795 --> 00:26:39,065
No she won't.
380
00:26:39,065 --> 00:26:40,733
Oh, aye, Mrs. Lopsided?
381
00:26:40,733 --> 00:26:42,368
'Cause she'll be dead.
382
00:26:42,368 --> 00:26:48,507
Can't send invitations
when you're in your coffin.
383
00:26:48,507 --> 00:26:55,715
Here. Turn around. Go on.
Turn around, both of you.
384
00:26:55,715 --> 00:26:58,284
( melancholy theme playing )
385
00:27:15,201 --> 00:27:17,136
You'll take me, mister, won't you?
386
00:27:17,136 --> 00:27:18,504
Dog cemetery.
387
00:27:18,504 --> 00:27:21,107
Won't take you because
there's not one, is there?
388
00:27:22,842 --> 00:27:24,944
Will you, mister?
389
00:27:34,353 --> 00:27:36,255
Can we, mister?
390
00:27:47,333 --> 00:27:48,600
I'll take you.
391
00:27:48,600 --> 00:27:50,402
Where is it then? Don't believe you.
392
00:27:50,402 --> 00:27:53,372
It's across the river.
One seventy-three bus.
393
00:27:53,372 --> 00:27:56,042
That's where it is.
394
00:27:56,042 --> 00:27:59,779
You'll take me, mister. Won't you?
395
00:27:59,779 --> 00:28:01,180
Across the river?
396
00:28:04,751 --> 00:28:07,386
Can we, mister? Cross the river?
397
00:28:07,386 --> 00:28:11,023
Oh. Oh, you've changed
your mind now, have you?
398
00:28:11,023 --> 00:28:13,125
To see the new buildings.
399
00:28:13,125 --> 00:28:16,062
The high one son
the other side of the river.
400
00:28:16,062 --> 00:28:18,931
'Cause that's where we're gonna live.
401
00:28:18,931 --> 00:28:20,299
Well, as soon as I've fed Bella, then.
402
00:28:20,299 --> 00:28:24,236
Can't, mister. Not now. It's our mom.
403
00:28:24,236 --> 00:28:26,305
Oh, you were poking fun at me, were you?
404
00:28:26,305 --> 00:28:28,741
She's expecting us.
405
00:28:28,741 --> 00:28:31,577
Tomorrow we can though. After dinner.
406
00:28:31,577 --> 00:28:33,846
Honestly.
407
00:28:33,846 --> 00:28:35,815
Oh, I don't know about tomorrow.
408
00:28:35,815 --> 00:28:38,350
Tomorrow's another day, isn't it?
409
00:28:38,350 --> 00:28:41,754
I'll have to think about that.
I don't know.
410
00:28:41,754 --> 00:28:43,589
I mean...
411
00:28:43,589 --> 00:28:48,627
Oh. Go on, Bella. Come on.
That's a good girl.
412
00:28:48,627 --> 00:28:49,862
Ta, mister.
413
00:28:49,862 --> 00:28:53,800
I said "Maybe," mind.
414
00:28:53,800 --> 00:28:56,368
Maybe means perhaps.
415
00:28:56,368 --> 00:28:58,637
And perhaps means if.
416
00:28:58,637 --> 00:29:03,442
And if means maybe.
417
00:29:03,442 --> 00:29:05,744
And that's all I've said, mind.
418
00:29:09,315 --> 00:29:13,319
MARK: Ta, mister. See you tomorrow.
419
00:29:13,319 --> 00:29:17,289
See you tomorrow.
420
00:29:17,289 --> 00:29:19,491
( uplifting theme plays )
421
00:29:25,531 --> 00:29:27,566
SAM ( reciting ): I can't go to sleep
At night
422
00:29:27,566 --> 00:29:29,001
When I go to bed
423
00:29:29,001 --> 00:29:30,903
For fear I'll wake up
In the morn
424
00:29:30,903 --> 00:29:33,272
And discover I am dead
425
00:29:33,272 --> 00:29:37,043
Last night I had a dream
That someone took my life
426
00:29:37,043 --> 00:29:39,979
I screamed out, "Murder! Spare me, sir
427
00:29:39,979 --> 00:29:42,348
"But you're welcome
To the wife"
428
00:29:51,123 --> 00:29:53,325
( church bells toll )
429
00:30:03,202 --> 00:30:06,405
Those little devils. No sense of time.
430
00:30:10,109 --> 00:30:14,146
Kids these days,
they don't know about time.
431
00:30:14,146 --> 00:30:16,983
"Take the pot to the kettle,"
432
00:30:18,350 --> 00:30:20,652
my mother always used to say.
433
00:30:20,652 --> 00:30:22,354
"And let it draw. "
434
00:30:24,623 --> 00:30:26,859
( sighs )
435
00:30:30,997 --> 00:30:32,431
How are you, love?
436
00:30:34,033 --> 00:30:37,436
I'd get the vet for you,
but they don't understand artists.
437
00:30:41,874 --> 00:30:44,877
Oh look at that, Rafferty. Heh.
438
00:30:44,877 --> 00:30:46,845
Graceful as a tank.
439
00:30:46,845 --> 00:30:49,148
Accrington Hippodrome. Remember him?
440
00:30:53,285 --> 00:30:56,322
Accrington Hippodrome,
that's going back a bit.
441
00:30:56,322 --> 00:30:59,558
They cut his act so short,
he opened and closed in a blackout.
442
00:30:59,558 --> 00:31:02,061
I remember that.
443
00:31:02,061 --> 00:31:03,996
What are you gonna do now?
444
00:31:03,996 --> 00:31:05,531
I'm gonna cook the dinner.
445
00:31:05,531 --> 00:31:07,133
Yeah.
446
00:31:07,133 --> 00:31:10,336
If I'm gonna work, I'd better
have mine early, hadn't I?
447
00:31:10,336 --> 00:31:11,537
Here.
448
00:31:11,537 --> 00:31:13,172
We ain't got time.
449
00:31:13,172 --> 00:31:15,107
It'll only take five minutes.
450
00:31:15,107 --> 00:31:17,176
Where's the baby? MUM: With Liz.
451
00:31:17,176 --> 00:31:18,410
I'd better lock the door.
452
00:31:18,410 --> 00:31:20,612
( children screaming and playing )
453
00:31:20,612 --> 00:31:22,381
( James cooing )
454
00:31:27,686 --> 00:31:29,755
That's better.
455
00:31:29,755 --> 00:31:31,623
Can't stand untidiness.
456
00:31:32,858 --> 00:31:34,826
What was that act there?
457
00:31:34,826 --> 00:31:37,029
Mactulluck's Ten Tiny Tappers,
458
00:31:37,029 --> 00:31:39,465
they were on the bill with us in Edinburgh.
459
00:31:39,465 --> 00:31:42,601
You tried to have an affair
with Miss Pullen.
460
00:31:42,601 --> 00:31:45,104
There were McGregors, and McPersons,
461
00:31:45,104 --> 00:31:48,240
and McBrownsmen, and McSmithsmen--
462
00:31:48,240 --> 00:31:50,109
No, wait a minute.
463
00:31:50,109 --> 00:31:51,343
I know it.
464
00:31:51,343 --> 00:31:53,612
I know it, like me own name.
465
00:31:53,612 --> 00:31:55,681
( Sam muttering )
466
00:31:59,986 --> 00:32:01,587
Huh.
467
00:32:01,587 --> 00:32:06,158
* Humpty-dumpty-tiddly-tumpty
Tumpty-tumpty-tum *
468
00:32:06,158 --> 00:32:07,559
* Diddly-dum-- *
469
00:32:07,559 --> 00:32:08,760
Remember that?
470
00:32:08,760 --> 00:32:10,596
* Diddly-dumpty-dum *
471
00:32:10,596 --> 00:32:15,434
* Humpty-dumpty-dumpty-dumpty
Dumpty-dumpty-dum *
472
00:32:16,735 --> 00:32:18,937
( humming )
473
00:32:30,449 --> 00:32:31,950
( whimpering )
474
00:32:40,359 --> 00:32:42,194
How'd you like me to play at your funeral?
475
00:32:42,194 --> 00:32:44,230
Eh?( whimpers )
476
00:32:44,230 --> 00:32:47,066
No, I'm only joking.
477
00:32:50,502 --> 00:32:53,305
Once had an IOU.
478
00:32:53,305 --> 00:32:56,242
IO died, now I've got U.
479
00:33:03,715 --> 00:33:05,117
You're looking better.
480
00:33:06,285 --> 00:33:08,987
Not still waiting for those two, are you?
481
00:33:08,987 --> 00:33:10,656
( laughing )
482
00:33:16,095 --> 00:33:17,496
Remember that?
483
00:33:18,797 --> 00:33:21,400
Hey! Hey!
484
00:33:26,004 --> 00:33:28,407
Hey! Hey!
485
00:33:28,407 --> 00:33:30,409
Hey!
486
00:33:30,409 --> 00:33:33,879
Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
487
00:33:33,879 --> 00:33:36,382
Blimey, it wasn't that lousy.
Here, come here.
488
00:33:36,382 --> 00:33:38,850
Where's Dad? Went back to work.
489
00:33:38,850 --> 00:33:41,153
Sit down, I'll get your dinner in a minute.
490
00:33:43,189 --> 00:33:44,623
What's that?
491
00:33:49,661 --> 00:33:51,430
Something you've been doing at school?
492
00:33:51,430 --> 00:33:53,365
This one's of a volcano
they showed us in a book.
493
00:33:53,365 --> 00:33:55,834
Very nice. Well, look then.
494
00:33:55,834 --> 00:33:58,270
I will in a minute, I'm changing the baby.
495
00:34:03,609 --> 00:34:06,745
( singing in a foreign language )
496
00:34:34,906 --> 00:34:37,809
Move it, I can't play while
you're climbing all over me.
497
00:34:53,792 --> 00:34:57,763
Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
498
00:35:02,134 --> 00:35:04,603
Remember that? You loved that there.
499
00:35:08,440 --> 00:35:09,875
Quick, we're late.
500
00:35:11,910 --> 00:35:13,412
( door slams shut )
501
00:35:17,283 --> 00:35:19,951
There you are, them bloody kids.
502
00:35:19,951 --> 00:35:21,787
I'll pull up the drawbridge.
503
00:35:22,788 --> 00:35:24,490
Let them try and break that down.
504
00:35:25,557 --> 00:35:27,359
You go and tell him we're here.
505
00:35:33,599 --> 00:35:35,734
You took your time, didn't you?
506
00:35:37,436 --> 00:35:39,638
Well, my time's private time.
507
00:35:40,906 --> 00:35:42,574
Not public time.
508
00:35:52,050 --> 00:35:56,622
My time is not yours to waste.
509
00:35:56,622 --> 00:35:58,156
My time.
510
00:35:59,825 --> 00:36:01,760
He's not going.
511
00:36:01,760 --> 00:36:03,295
Not my fault.
512
00:36:13,672 --> 00:36:14,906
( Bella barks )
513
00:36:23,782 --> 00:36:27,185
( melancholy theme playing )
514
00:36:36,127 --> 00:36:38,330
( upbeat theme playing )
515
00:36:47,906 --> 00:36:49,775
FEMALE CONDUCTOR: Fares, please.
516
00:36:52,878 --> 00:36:55,547
One and two halves to Hyde Park, please.
517
00:36:58,950 --> 00:37:00,352
Thank you.
518
00:38:50,328 --> 00:38:51,730
Where's he gone?
519
00:38:51,730 --> 00:38:53,465
Gentleman's convenience.
520
00:38:53,465 --> 00:38:55,434
Oh, aye. His boots too tight?
521
00:38:59,070 --> 00:39:00,271
How old is he?
522
00:39:00,271 --> 00:39:01,473
Six.
523
00:39:01,473 --> 00:39:03,208
Well, if he wants to be seven...
524
00:39:03,208 --> 00:39:05,677
( upbeat theme playing )
525
00:39:49,320 --> 00:39:50,889
Why can't Bella come?
526
00:39:50,889 --> 00:39:53,425
LIZ: Dog's got feelings,
the same as you have.
527
00:40:14,546 --> 00:40:16,582
Is this it, mister?
528
00:40:16,582 --> 00:40:18,684
The cemetery?
529
00:40:18,684 --> 00:40:21,820
You've got to be a special dog,
haven't you?
530
00:40:21,820 --> 00:40:23,555
How'd you get in then?
531
00:40:24,990 --> 00:40:29,094
MARK: Haven't you, mister?
Got to be a special dog?
532
00:40:29,094 --> 00:40:30,529
Aye, royalty.
533
00:40:31,329 --> 00:40:32,864
Is Bella a royal dog?
534
00:40:32,864 --> 00:40:35,834
Well off, you know, on her mother's side.
535
00:40:39,571 --> 00:40:40,972
Not disappointed, are you?
536
00:40:42,307 --> 00:40:44,643
It doesn't mean a thing
unless you know the history.
537
00:40:44,643 --> 00:40:46,878
You know the history, don't you, mister?
538
00:40:46,878 --> 00:40:50,081
Oh, practically wrote a book about it.
539
00:40:50,081 --> 00:40:52,518
I would have done,
if I'd have wrote a book at all.
540
00:41:02,460 --> 00:41:03,795
Stone's cold.
541
00:41:03,795 --> 00:41:05,864
That's why they say, "Stone dead. "
542
00:41:11,937 --> 00:41:14,540
Makes a very good Grand Marnier soufflé
543
00:41:14,540 --> 00:41:15,941
does the chef here.
544
00:41:16,842 --> 00:41:19,477
( band playing Dixieland jazz )
545
00:41:30,488 --> 00:41:31,723
See you, Fred.
546
00:41:31,723 --> 00:41:33,825
Yeah, I'll look out for you, Sam.
547
00:41:54,312 --> 00:41:56,982
( playing "When the Saints Go Marching In")
548
00:42:14,866 --> 00:42:16,735
Come off the stick and give it a kiss.
549
00:42:28,413 --> 00:42:31,783
Hello, hello, hello.
We're about to do a show.
550
00:42:31,783 --> 00:42:34,052
Turn around and face this way, come on.
551
00:42:35,220 --> 00:42:36,755
Come on, Snowy.
552
00:42:36,755 --> 00:42:38,757
And Billy, face this way please.
553
00:42:38,757 --> 00:42:41,126
Come on, Chubby. Fred.
554
00:42:41,126 --> 00:42:42,928
Please, Fred. Thank you.
555
00:42:42,928 --> 00:42:45,296
Now then, I shall pass amongst you,
556
00:42:45,296 --> 00:42:49,835
and pick out an object at random
from your personal persons.
557
00:42:49,835 --> 00:42:51,737
And my colleague here,
558
00:42:51,737 --> 00:42:54,439
although completely blindfolded,
will convey to you
559
00:42:54,439 --> 00:42:57,643
without any previous knowledge,
what that object is.
560
00:42:57,643 --> 00:42:59,044
Excuse me, one moment.
561
00:42:59,577 --> 00:43:01,279
Ah, protégé,
562
00:43:01,279 --> 00:43:03,181
what have I got here?
563
00:43:03,181 --> 00:43:04,449
What have I got here?
564
00:43:04,449 --> 00:43:07,352
Concentrate. Now latch on to it,
latch on to it, protégé.
565
00:43:07,352 --> 00:43:08,553
A key?
566
00:43:08,553 --> 00:43:10,188
A key, correct!( audience laughs )
567
00:43:10,188 --> 00:43:13,058
The boy is a marvel, the boy is a marvel.
A living marvel.
568
00:43:13,058 --> 00:43:14,893
I must ask him sometime how he does it.
569
00:43:14,893 --> 00:43:17,195
Right. Can we have the first
number please, madam?
570
00:43:20,031 --> 00:43:23,635
Concentrate, little genius. Five.
571
00:43:23,635 --> 00:43:26,337
Five! Correct.
572
00:43:26,337 --> 00:43:31,943
SAM:* Sometimes it wasn't half
As bad as all that, sometimes *
573
00:43:33,611 --> 00:43:38,817
* Sometimes, he nearly
made me feel important *
574
00:43:38,817 --> 00:43:41,486
* Only sometimes *
575
00:43:41,486 --> 00:43:47,625
* Don't know exactly what we
had but there were fun times *
576
00:43:47,625 --> 00:43:49,460
Thank you very much indeed.
577
00:43:49,460 --> 00:43:56,367
* Sometimes, he made me feel
Important, only sometimes *
578
00:43:58,136 --> 00:44:00,471
* Bom-diddy-bang
Diddy-boodee-bang-bang *
579
00:44:00,471 --> 00:44:02,573
* Play me a tune, mister
Play, strong man *
580
00:44:02,573 --> 00:44:05,176
* Bom-diddy-bang
Diddy-boodee-bang-bang *
581
00:44:05,176 --> 00:44:07,345
* Hit that drum
As hard as you can *
582
00:44:07,345 --> 00:44:09,647
* Bom-diddy-bang
Diddy-boodee-bang-bang *
583
00:44:09,647 --> 00:44:11,917
* Diddy-bang-diddy-bom
Diddy-boodee-bang-bang *
584
00:44:11,917 --> 00:44:16,822
* Diddy-bang-diddy-bom-diddy
Bom-diddy-boodee-bang-bang *
585
00:44:16,822 --> 00:44:19,057
* When I was just
A little boy *
586
00:44:19,057 --> 00:44:21,559
* My folks didn't buy me
Many things *
587
00:44:21,559 --> 00:44:26,031
* One day they bought me
A wonderful toy *
588
00:44:26,031 --> 00:44:28,599
* And it was made of tin
And yellow painted engines *
589
00:44:28,599 --> 00:44:30,435
* Soldiers marched around it *
590
00:44:30,435 --> 00:44:35,173
* When you hit it with a stick
It made one hell of a sound *
591
00:44:35,173 --> 00:44:38,076
* It went bom-diddy-bang
Diddy-boodee-bang-bang *
592
00:44:38,076 --> 00:44:40,445
* Play me a tune, mister
Play, strong man *
593
00:44:40,445 --> 00:44:42,948
* Bom-diddy-bang Diddy-boodee-bang-bang *
594
00:44:42,948 --> 00:44:45,383
* Hit that drum
As hard as you can *
595
00:44:45,383 --> 00:44:47,318
* Bom-diddy-bang
Diddy-boodee-bang-bang *
596
00:44:47,318 --> 00:44:49,788
* Diddy-bang-diddy-bom
Diddy-boodee-bang-bang *
597
00:44:49,788 --> 00:44:54,325
* Diddy-bang-diddy-bom-diddy
Bom-diddy-boodee-bang-bang *
598
00:44:54,325 --> 00:44:56,795
* Years have gone by
And I'm older now *
599
00:44:56,795 --> 00:44:58,563
* And I'm in the music game *
600
00:44:58,563 --> 00:45:04,369
* Songs and singers come and go
Drummers stay the same *
601
00:45:04,369 --> 00:45:06,637
* Listen, old drummer man
Give me this advice *
602
00:45:06,637 --> 00:45:08,406
* The best I've ever had *
603
00:45:08,406 --> 00:45:10,809
* He said, "Son, a good drum
Makes a bad band good *
604
00:45:10,809 --> 00:45:14,012
* "And a bad one a good
band bad," everybody now *
605
00:45:14,012 --> 00:45:16,247
* Bom-diddy-bang
Diddy-boodee-bang-bang *
606
00:45:16,247 --> 00:45:18,316
* Play me a tune, mister
Play, strong man... *
607
00:45:19,350 --> 00:45:20,585
She's not well.
608
00:45:20,585 --> 00:45:22,921
Uh...
609
00:45:22,921 --> 00:45:24,689
You're like Gotti then.
610
00:45:24,689 --> 00:45:29,895
Any thoughts you can get,
and give you naught in return.
611
00:45:36,234 --> 00:45:37,635
Aren't you going to count it?
612
00:45:37,635 --> 00:45:39,170
No.
613
00:45:42,673 --> 00:45:47,378
BUSKER: * Many machines
Go marching in *
614
00:45:47,378 --> 00:45:52,183
* And the old drummer man
Plays like hell *
615
00:45:52,183 --> 00:45:53,852
* Bom-diddy-bang
Diddy-boodee-bang-bang *
616
00:45:53,852 --> 00:45:56,687
* Play me a tune, mister Play, strong man *
617
00:45:56,687 --> 00:45:59,090
* Bom-diddy-bang
Diddy-boodee-bang-bang *
618
00:45:59,090 --> 00:46:01,126
* You beat that drum
As hard as you can *
619
00:46:01,126 --> 00:46:02,527
* Bom-diddy-bang *
620
00:46:13,905 --> 00:46:15,306
Change?
621
00:46:17,575 --> 00:46:20,211
Right. Grownups first.
622
00:46:28,653 --> 00:46:30,255
Ladies next.
623
00:46:34,259 --> 00:46:35,961
Here.
624
00:46:35,961 --> 00:46:38,063
Get your chops around that, love.
625
00:46:45,003 --> 00:46:47,072
What's up? Have you lost something?
626
00:46:47,805 --> 00:46:49,207
We have to go.
627
00:46:49,207 --> 00:46:50,808
Oh.
628
00:46:57,148 --> 00:47:00,551
You see, I thought, that you said
629
00:47:00,551 --> 00:47:03,121
that you were going to go
take me to see the flats.
630
00:47:03,121 --> 00:47:04,923
That's what I thought anyway.
631
00:47:06,724 --> 00:47:08,459
Still, no matter.
632
00:47:10,128 --> 00:47:11,629
I've got an idea.
633
00:47:11,629 --> 00:47:13,764
Why don't we...
634
00:47:13,764 --> 00:47:15,833
( children chuckling slightly )
635
00:47:15,833 --> 00:47:17,302
All go and see the flats?
636
00:47:19,004 --> 00:47:21,139
And we can see the flats at the same time.
637
00:47:21,139 --> 00:47:23,374
( tender theme playing )
638
00:48:45,323 --> 00:48:47,825
SAM ( reciting ):
Once they were proud of heroes
639
00:48:47,825 --> 00:48:50,528
Heroes like Fireman Jim
640
00:48:50,528 --> 00:48:54,132
Once they would cheer
And shake his hand
641
00:48:54,132 --> 00:48:57,535
When the tale
Of his life was told.
642
00:48:57,535 --> 00:49:01,139
But the world soon forgets
What a hero has done
643
00:49:01,139 --> 00:49:04,142
When a man like Jim grows old
644
00:49:04,142 --> 00:49:06,611
MARK: That's where we live.
645
00:49:06,611 --> 00:49:08,746
You can't hear them though, can you?
646
00:49:08,746 --> 00:49:11,482
What? The trains.
647
00:49:59,897 --> 00:50:02,300
Bella's left ear's bigger.
648
00:50:02,300 --> 00:50:04,402
Don't make her no less of a dog, does it?
649
00:50:04,402 --> 00:50:05,803
Shows she's intelligent.
650
00:50:05,803 --> 00:50:08,506
All clever dogs have got bigger left ears.
651
00:50:11,742 --> 00:50:13,578
( sing-song ): * Sail away *
652
00:50:13,578 --> 00:50:16,281
* Far away Wherever she may be *
653
00:50:16,281 --> 00:50:17,615
*Take with thee *
654
00:50:17,615 --> 00:50:21,018
* Tenderly A fond memory *
655
00:50:22,620 --> 00:50:25,590
Everything floats away, doesn't it?
656
00:50:25,590 --> 00:50:27,658
MARK: You've been all over
the world, haven't you?
657
00:50:27,658 --> 00:50:30,961
Oh, aye. Bond Street. Piccadilly.
658
00:50:30,961 --> 00:50:32,597
Oxford Circus.
659
00:50:32,597 --> 00:50:34,165
Was your wife there?
660
00:50:34,165 --> 00:50:36,734
No, no. She went. Took the baby and went.
661
00:50:36,734 --> 00:50:37,935
How?
662
00:50:37,935 --> 00:50:39,237
She died.
663
00:50:39,237 --> 00:50:40,638
Just like they all do.
664
00:50:40,638 --> 00:50:43,408
They get up on their hind legs
and leave you.
665
00:50:43,408 --> 00:50:46,511
On the platform at Crewe without a ticket.
666
00:50:46,511 --> 00:50:50,115
Not like dogs. Heh, heh.
667
00:50:50,115 --> 00:50:51,616
She'll never leave me, will you?
668
00:50:51,616 --> 00:50:54,152
No.
669
00:50:54,152 --> 00:50:58,389
Listen, I may teach you null tales,
but I'll tell you this:
670
00:50:59,190 --> 00:51:02,393
You can forget all about humans.
671
00:51:02,393 --> 00:51:04,595
Might just as well take poison.
672
00:51:06,097 --> 00:51:07,698
But a dog?
673
00:51:07,698 --> 00:51:10,535
A dog will always be your friend.
674
00:51:10,535 --> 00:51:11,936
LIZ: We can't.
675
00:51:11,936 --> 00:51:13,404
MARK: Can we, mister?
676
00:51:14,372 --> 00:51:15,773
SAM: Can you what?
677
00:51:15,773 --> 00:51:17,675
Get a dog.
678
00:51:17,675 --> 00:51:20,878
Oh. Could you look after one?
679
00:51:20,878 --> 00:51:22,680
Feed it?
680
00:51:22,680 --> 00:51:24,749
Clean up after it?
681
00:51:24,749 --> 00:51:26,584
And you don't know where to get one?
682
00:51:28,286 --> 00:51:31,289
Right. Well, close your eyes.
683
00:51:31,289 --> 00:51:32,957
Close your eyes.
684
00:51:32,957 --> 00:51:34,159
Say, "Abracadabra. "
685
00:51:34,159 --> 00:51:35,360
BOTH: Abracadabra.
686
00:51:35,360 --> 00:51:36,561
"Fun-a-son-of-gabins. "
687
00:51:36,561 --> 00:51:37,995
BOTH: Fun-a-son-of-gabins.
688
00:51:37,995 --> 00:51:39,397
* Duh-dum, duh-dum, dum-dum *
689
00:51:39,397 --> 00:51:41,899
* Hey, this old man He played one *
690
00:51:41,899 --> 00:51:43,768
* He played knick knack on my drum *
691
00:51:43,768 --> 00:51:46,137
* With a knick-knack
Paddy whack, give a dog a bone *
692
00:51:46,137 --> 00:51:48,273
* This old man came Rolling home *
693
00:51:49,674 --> 00:51:51,576
* This old man He played two *
694
00:51:51,576 --> 00:51:53,444
* He played knick knack On my shoe *
695
00:51:53,444 --> 00:51:55,480
* With a knick-knack
Paddy whack, give a dog a bone *
696
00:51:55,480 --> 00:51:57,682
* This old man came Rolling home *
697
00:51:58,816 --> 00:52:00,385
* This old man He played three *
698
00:52:00,385 --> 00:52:02,753
* He played knick-knack On my tree *
699
00:52:02,753 --> 00:52:04,855
* With a knick-knack
Paddy whack, give a dog a bone *
700
00:52:04,855 --> 00:52:06,591
* This old man came Rolling home *
701
00:52:06,591 --> 00:52:08,593
* This old man He played four *
702
00:52:08,593 --> 00:52:10,461
* He played knick-knack On my door *
703
00:52:10,461 --> 00:52:12,463
* With a knick-knack
Paddy whack, give a dog a bone *
704
00:52:12,463 --> 00:52:14,399
* This old man came Rolling home *
705
00:52:15,833 --> 00:52:17,034
MARK: Can we?
706
00:52:17,034 --> 00:52:18,536
SAM: What? LIZ: Have a dog.
707
00:52:18,536 --> 00:52:21,038
SAM: Aye. Dog's Home. Lots to see.
708
00:52:21,038 --> 00:52:22,240
MARK: Today?
709
00:52:22,240 --> 00:52:23,441
SAM: Closed today.
710
00:52:23,441 --> 00:52:24,842
MARK: Tomorrow? SAM: Aye.
711
00:52:24,842 --> 00:52:26,043
LIZ: After school?
712
00:52:26,043 --> 00:52:27,645
SAM: Aye, after school, aye.
713
00:52:32,283 --> 00:52:33,684
Don't want no tea.
714
00:52:33,684 --> 00:52:35,486
Do without then.
715
00:52:38,122 --> 00:52:40,658
( whistle blowing )
716
00:52:42,026 --> 00:52:43,728
Hello, darling. Hi.
717
00:52:43,728 --> 00:52:45,496
Wonder what they'd say
if they could talk, eh?
718
00:52:45,496 --> 00:52:47,398
I bet it would be all,
"Gimmie, gimmie, gimmie. "
719
00:52:47,398 --> 00:52:48,799
Oh, they're all right.
720
00:52:48,799 --> 00:52:50,735
Well, you could always
look after mine, darling.
721
00:52:50,735 --> 00:52:53,238
Thanks, I've got enough with me own.
722
00:52:55,340 --> 00:52:57,174
( dogs barking )
723
00:53:26,170 --> 00:53:28,273
What do they do with them after?
724
00:53:28,273 --> 00:53:30,341
Send them to their ancestors.
725
00:53:30,341 --> 00:53:32,543
What's ancestors?
726
00:53:32,543 --> 00:53:34,879
Relations that grow on family trees.
727
00:53:36,714 --> 00:53:39,350
Shouldn't lock them up. Should let them go.
728
00:53:39,350 --> 00:53:41,185
Who do you think would feed them? Pigeons?
729
00:53:41,185 --> 00:53:42,653
I would.
730
00:53:55,533 --> 00:53:57,234
This the one you've chosen?
731
00:53:59,937 --> 00:54:01,806
What you gonna call it?
732
00:54:01,806 --> 00:54:02,873
Battersea.
733
00:54:02,873 --> 00:54:05,743
Battersea? Well that's original.
734
00:54:05,743 --> 00:54:07,044
That's where you found it,
735
00:54:07,044 --> 00:54:08,846
that's what you're gonna call it.
736
00:54:08,846 --> 00:54:12,116
Better than East Finchley
on Neismann, I suppose.
737
00:54:12,116 --> 00:54:13,351
Might have been Charring Cross.
738
00:54:13,351 --> 00:54:14,552
Is it ours?
739
00:54:14,552 --> 00:54:16,754
Yes, after a few formalities.
740
00:54:20,858 --> 00:54:22,993
He's not earwigging again is he?
741
00:54:22,993 --> 00:54:26,931
LIZ: I expect he's torn over coming
back after a few formalities.
742
00:54:26,931 --> 00:54:28,366
( Sam whistles )
743
00:54:40,478 --> 00:54:43,648
Excuse me, uh, are you the dog lady?
744
00:54:43,648 --> 00:54:45,916
One of the fellas said we have
to see you about the dog.
745
00:54:45,916 --> 00:54:47,352
Where did you lose it?
746
00:54:47,352 --> 00:54:50,087
Well, we didn't lose it, you see.
We found it, didn't we?
747
00:54:50,087 --> 00:54:51,622
In the kennels.
748
00:54:51,622 --> 00:54:53,023
SECRETARY: Name?
749
00:54:53,023 --> 00:54:55,360
Ellis. E-L...
750
00:54:55,360 --> 00:54:58,028
... L-I-S.
751
00:54:58,028 --> 00:55:00,164
That's correct.
752
00:55:00,164 --> 00:55:01,366
SECRETARY: Christian name?
753
00:55:01,366 --> 00:55:04,402
Mark. M-A...
754
00:55:04,402 --> 00:55:06,036
I know how to spell it.
755
00:55:07,838 --> 00:55:09,039
Address?
756
00:55:09,039 --> 00:55:10,708
Shall I write it?
757
00:55:15,112 --> 00:55:17,815
Now, all we need is for your
mommy or daddy to sign it.
758
00:55:19,850 --> 00:55:21,686
Anytime between now and Saturday.
759
00:55:22,953 --> 00:55:25,322
How do you mean, mommy or daddy?
760
00:55:26,457 --> 00:55:28,793
Well, we need an adult to be responsible.
761
00:55:30,928 --> 00:55:33,130
Oh, aye, aye.
762
00:55:33,130 --> 00:55:34,832
Mom or dad, you mean.
763
00:55:42,873 --> 00:55:46,377
How about their granddad?
Where would I sign?
764
00:55:50,247 --> 00:55:51,816
Huh.
765
00:55:51,816 --> 00:55:53,418
Right.
766
00:55:57,154 --> 00:56:01,091
Heh. Looks like me and all, doesn't he?
767
00:56:01,091 --> 00:56:02,326
Only not so pretty.
768
00:56:02,326 --> 00:56:04,028
You're older.
769
00:56:04,028 --> 00:56:08,032
And you're working yourself up
for a kick up the bum, you are.
770
00:56:08,032 --> 00:56:09,900
Go on sit over there until I call for you.
771
00:56:09,900 --> 00:56:12,102
Don't be rude to your old granddad.
772
00:56:13,638 --> 00:56:16,407
That's how we used to
bring them up in our day.
773
00:56:16,407 --> 00:56:17,908
What about me age? Do you want me age?
774
00:56:17,908 --> 00:56:19,477
Not if you're over eighteen.
775
00:56:19,477 --> 00:56:21,078
I am over eighteen, yes.
776
00:56:21,078 --> 00:56:23,481
Now if you'll just wait
while I make out a receipt.
777
00:56:23,481 --> 00:56:25,716
Yes. What receipt?
778
00:56:25,716 --> 00:56:28,653
We make a nominal charge for small dogs.
Three pounds fifty.
779
00:56:28,653 --> 00:56:30,054
Three pounds fifty for a small dog?
780
00:56:30,054 --> 00:56:32,056
You can have mine for a dollar.
781
00:56:32,056 --> 00:56:35,292
SECRETARY: But it's only
a nominal charge for expenses.
782
00:56:35,292 --> 00:56:36,794
It's on the form.
783
00:56:38,195 --> 00:56:40,297
I can't read all that small print.
784
00:56:40,297 --> 00:56:41,799
There isn't any small print.
785
00:56:41,799 --> 00:56:44,569
It's me eyes. I've got
small eyes and everything.
786
00:56:45,436 --> 00:56:47,137
Well... Well then, uh...
787
00:56:47,137 --> 00:56:49,574
Then you don't want us to reserve the dog?
788
00:56:49,574 --> 00:56:52,042
No, no, reserve the dog, yes, definitely.
789
00:56:52,042 --> 00:56:54,311
Only it's his father, you see.
790
00:56:54,311 --> 00:56:56,947
I promised him and, uh...
791
00:56:56,947 --> 00:56:59,349
It's his birthday and I
don't want to disappoint him.
792
00:56:59,349 --> 00:57:00,718
You understand. I mean, you know.
793
00:57:00,718 --> 00:57:03,488
So we'll be back. Before Saturday?
794
00:57:03,488 --> 00:57:05,823
Oh, yes. Before Saturday.
795
00:57:05,823 --> 00:57:08,826
We'll be back before Saturday, yes.
796
00:57:20,738 --> 00:57:22,507
I'm not your granddad, am I?
797
00:57:25,476 --> 00:57:28,879
Serves you right for telling lies.
798
00:57:31,749 --> 00:57:34,218
You can't de-show
once you're faced with it.
799
00:57:36,754 --> 00:57:39,056
Just because I signed me name...
800
00:57:46,964 --> 00:57:49,199
I mean I don't even know
where you live, do I?
801
00:57:53,738 --> 00:57:55,973
Life's thieving, isn't it?
802
00:58:49,093 --> 00:58:51,128
( whimpering )
803
00:58:59,937 --> 00:59:02,206
( inaudible dialogue )
804
00:59:08,713 --> 00:59:10,948
( dog barking )
805
00:59:13,684 --> 00:59:15,786
Is she still there?
806
00:59:15,786 --> 00:59:17,655
Can you hear her?
807
00:59:17,655 --> 00:59:19,223
Really?
808
00:59:31,602 --> 00:59:34,905
You did hear her, really?
809
00:59:34,905 --> 00:59:36,440
How are we going to get the money?
810
00:59:36,440 --> 00:59:37,775
How do you think?
811
00:59:37,775 --> 00:59:39,176
How long will it take us?
812
00:59:39,176 --> 00:59:40,377
A month of Sundays.
813
00:59:40,377 --> 00:59:41,578
How long is that?
814
00:59:41,578 --> 00:59:43,580
Longer than Saturday, anyway.
815
00:59:46,250 --> 00:59:49,586
They said you gotta buy
a bottle first, before you can win.
816
01:00:01,365 --> 01:00:04,001
Can I have the money
on the empty bottles, please?
817
01:00:08,538 --> 01:00:10,741
( bottles clattering )
818
01:00:20,150 --> 01:00:21,919
Thank you, dear.
819
01:00:23,721 --> 01:00:26,924
There. That's for being so kind.
820
01:00:26,924 --> 01:00:29,259
The mean old cow.
821
01:00:29,259 --> 01:00:30,460
( thunder crashing )
822
01:00:30,460 --> 01:00:32,863
If five men work for two days
823
01:00:32,863 --> 01:00:37,935
and they got paid one pound an hour,
824
01:00:37,935 --> 01:00:41,872
and they worked for 10 hours each day,
825
01:00:41,872 --> 01:00:44,174
how much would they get paid?
826
01:00:44,174 --> 01:00:45,876
Elizabeth?
827
01:00:46,977 --> 01:00:49,714
How much would they get paid?
828
01:00:49,714 --> 01:00:51,882
Elizabeth?
829
01:00:51,882 --> 01:00:53,784
Not enough, miss.
830
01:00:55,953 --> 01:00:57,321
What time's Dad coming home?
831
01:00:57,321 --> 01:00:59,857
When he's finished. Never home, is he?
832
01:00:59,857 --> 01:01:01,058
Huh? Well, you say it.
833
01:01:01,058 --> 01:01:02,727
Well, that's different.
834
01:01:02,727 --> 01:01:05,095
He doesn't do it because
he likes doing it, does he?
835
01:01:05,095 --> 01:01:07,364
You don't want us to live here
all our lives, do you?
836
01:01:07,364 --> 01:01:10,134
Well, anyway, always talking
about the new flat.
837
01:01:10,134 --> 01:01:11,736
Never get it. We will.
838
01:01:11,736 --> 01:01:14,338
It's not up to us anyway.
It's up to the council.
839
01:01:14,338 --> 01:01:18,242
Besides, even if we did get it,
it doesn't mean we'd enjoy it.
840
01:01:18,242 --> 01:01:21,345
Not as if we got something to look after.
841
01:01:21,345 --> 01:01:23,914
I mean, if we had a dog or something.
842
01:01:23,914 --> 01:01:26,183
It could keep us company
and keep off burglars.
843
01:01:26,183 --> 01:01:27,384
Burglars?
844
01:01:27,384 --> 01:01:29,486
What we got to burgle?
845
01:01:29,486 --> 01:01:31,588
Honestly, look at it?
846
01:01:31,588 --> 01:01:34,124
What do you kids get up to?
It's not my fault.
847
01:01:34,124 --> 01:01:36,193
Well, you're the oldest.
You should look after him.
848
01:01:36,193 --> 01:01:39,730
Why should I?
Same reason we look after you.
849
01:01:39,730 --> 01:01:41,999
( dramatic theme playing )
850
01:02:01,085 --> 01:02:04,354
SAM ( reciting ): They were always up
To hearing my voice
851
01:02:04,354 --> 01:02:07,224
People fancied I couldn't rejoice
852
01:02:07,224 --> 01:02:11,028
It weren't that I Really wanted to cry
853
01:02:11,028 --> 01:02:14,098
I were born with a tear In me voice
854
01:02:20,270 --> 01:02:21,972
( whimpers )
855
01:02:45,229 --> 01:02:46,797
( whimpers )
856
01:03:22,466 --> 01:03:23,733
( door closes )
857
01:03:23,733 --> 01:03:25,669
Hm. Come here.
858
01:03:25,669 --> 01:03:28,105
Found you a fairy godmother.
859
01:03:29,639 --> 01:03:31,341
Sit down.
860
01:03:36,146 --> 01:03:39,616
I want you to babysit, that's all.
861
01:03:39,616 --> 01:03:42,252
Look after her while I'm out working.
862
01:03:42,252 --> 01:03:44,922
Five pence for the pair of you.
863
01:03:47,191 --> 01:03:50,160
You haven't got the money
for your dog, have you?
864
01:03:55,432 --> 01:03:56,901
What's up? You lost your tongue?
865
01:03:56,901 --> 01:03:58,768
We can't, mister. It's our mum.
866
01:03:58,768 --> 01:04:00,270
We've got to go home.
867
01:04:00,270 --> 01:04:03,340
Oh. Got to go home. Oh.
868
01:04:03,340 --> 01:04:06,310
Come on then. Go on. Out you go.
869
01:04:14,151 --> 01:04:15,419
What are you waiting for?
870
01:04:15,419 --> 01:04:17,187
You've had your invitation.
871
01:04:17,187 --> 01:04:21,091
Can't, mister, not even
if you gave us 10 pennies each.
872
01:04:21,091 --> 01:04:23,160
Ten pennies each?
873
01:04:23,160 --> 01:04:26,063
Bloody bed bugs are
better company than you are.
874
01:04:26,063 --> 01:04:28,933
Go on. Out.
875
01:04:29,900 --> 01:04:32,269
Bolt the door behind you.
876
01:04:32,269 --> 01:04:35,472
Invite him to the funeral.
I should think so.
877
01:04:38,608 --> 01:04:40,610
Smell that.
878
01:04:40,610 --> 01:04:42,379
Save that for later.
879
01:04:42,379 --> 01:04:43,680
I want to.
880
01:04:43,680 --> 01:04:46,283
You know you can't. We've got to go home.
881
01:04:52,556 --> 01:04:54,358
SAM: Ten pence!
882
01:04:56,593 --> 01:04:58,595
That's me last and final offer.
883
01:04:58,595 --> 01:05:01,065
What do you say?
884
01:05:01,065 --> 01:05:02,566
You've got two hours, haven't you?
885
01:05:02,566 --> 01:05:03,833
I can't leave her.
886
01:05:03,833 --> 01:05:05,970
Ten pennies each, mister, an hour.
887
01:05:05,970 --> 01:05:08,005
Oh, that's it.
888
01:05:08,005 --> 01:05:09,606
I knew she were bargaining.
889
01:05:09,606 --> 01:05:11,641
You really mean it, don't you, mister?
890
01:05:11,641 --> 01:05:14,911
Aye. She got you affairs.
891
01:05:20,417 --> 01:05:21,485
( door closes )
892
01:05:21,485 --> 01:05:23,954
Well, come in if you're coming.
893
01:05:26,190 --> 01:05:28,558
You can give her some milk if she wants it.
894
01:05:28,558 --> 01:05:31,261
You'll need to warm it up a bit.
895
01:05:31,261 --> 01:05:34,664
And, uh, give her one of these dog pills
896
01:05:34,664 --> 01:05:35,932
if she gets a bit--
897
01:05:35,932 --> 01:05:37,367
( coughs )
898
01:05:37,367 --> 01:05:39,569
But don't take none yourself.
899
01:05:39,569 --> 01:05:41,171
I'm not a dog.
900
01:05:44,041 --> 01:05:45,775
I'll be back about eight o'clock.
901
01:05:45,775 --> 01:05:47,911
You'd better be.
902
01:05:47,911 --> 01:05:49,546
Huh.
903
01:05:53,550 --> 01:05:54,784
( clattering )
904
01:05:54,784 --> 01:05:56,320
( tambourine rattling )
905
01:05:58,822 --> 01:06:02,126
Hey, don't touch anything, you hear?
906
01:06:02,126 --> 01:06:03,827
That's all private, is that.
907
01:06:03,827 --> 01:06:05,562
My private things.
908
01:06:05,562 --> 01:06:07,664
If you do, I'll know about it.
909
01:06:07,664 --> 01:06:09,299
There's a fella lives in that wardrobe.
910
01:06:09,299 --> 01:06:11,335
Been in there for years.
911
01:06:13,070 --> 01:06:15,305
One of my lodgers.
912
01:06:21,011 --> 01:06:22,879
I saw that.
913
01:06:22,879 --> 01:06:24,881
I saw it.
914
01:06:24,881 --> 01:06:26,483
Ah.
915
01:06:34,858 --> 01:06:38,328
You'd better let her go to sleep.
916
01:06:38,328 --> 01:06:39,729
No.
917
01:06:39,729 --> 01:06:41,498
She mightn't wake up.
918
01:06:41,498 --> 01:06:43,667
LIZ: Might be a blessing.
919
01:06:44,968 --> 01:06:47,104
( uplifting theme playing )
920
01:06:48,605 --> 01:06:50,874
You're not supposed to touch anything.
921
01:06:50,874 --> 01:06:52,642
What are you doing then?
922
01:06:52,642 --> 01:06:54,678
Supposing he comes back?
923
01:06:54,678 --> 01:06:57,647
Supposing, supposing.
924
01:08:18,762 --> 01:08:20,497
Eight o'clock, you said.
925
01:08:20,497 --> 01:08:22,499
Look after her, you said. I'd pay, I said.
926
01:08:22,499 --> 01:08:24,468
Who's babysitting who?
That's what I want to know.
927
01:08:24,468 --> 01:08:27,737
( sneezes, then barks )
928
01:08:27,737 --> 01:08:29,038
Feeling better, are we?
929
01:08:29,038 --> 01:08:30,540
( chuckles )
930
01:08:30,540 --> 01:08:32,676
A man's got no business
doing business with kids.
931
01:08:32,676 --> 01:08:35,645
Might as well try riding
a three-legged donkey.
932
01:08:35,645 --> 01:08:37,481
Can we have our money, please?
933
01:08:37,481 --> 01:08:40,083
Oh, you're wide awake now, aren't you?
934
01:08:40,083 --> 01:08:41,718
Wide awake, yeah.
935
01:08:41,718 --> 01:08:43,353
Right then.
936
01:08:43,353 --> 01:08:46,122
May as well settle me debts. ( yawns )
937
01:08:46,122 --> 01:08:48,858
Ten, 20, 30, 40.
938
01:08:48,858 --> 01:08:50,059
Don't be late tomorrow.
939
01:08:50,059 --> 01:08:51,895
Come on.
940
01:08:54,864 --> 01:08:56,766
Bye, mister.
941
01:08:56,766 --> 01:08:58,001
Thanks, mister.
942
01:08:58,001 --> 01:09:00,170
( door opens )
943
01:09:00,170 --> 01:09:02,206
Bye.
944
01:09:02,206 --> 01:09:03,673
It could have been worse, you know, love.
945
01:09:03,673 --> 01:09:05,642
( door closes )
You might have been run over.
946
01:09:05,642 --> 01:09:07,010
Hm?
947
01:09:07,010 --> 01:09:08,578
Shall we do the fandango,
948
01:09:08,578 --> 01:09:12,249
or would you prefer
a bit of formation dancing?
949
01:09:12,249 --> 01:09:14,050
Have we got enough?
950
01:09:14,050 --> 01:09:15,752
One pound 15 pennies.
951
01:09:15,752 --> 01:09:17,621
How much do we want?
952
01:09:19,189 --> 01:09:21,525
Tomorrow after school.
953
01:09:24,127 --> 01:09:25,329
The gates of hell.
954
01:09:25,329 --> 01:09:26,663
Best repent for your sins, mate.
955
01:09:26,663 --> 01:09:28,565
Haven't got any. Can't afford them.
956
01:09:28,565 --> 01:09:31,301
Aye, aye, it's our Georgie.
957
01:09:31,301 --> 01:09:33,770
Hey, Georgie, you know what she calls you?
958
01:09:33,770 --> 01:09:35,272
Passion pants.
959
01:09:35,272 --> 01:09:37,774
Can't help being handsome though, can he?
960
01:09:37,774 --> 01:09:39,509
No, but it helps.
961
01:10:08,472 --> 01:10:10,206
( steam hissing )
962
01:10:19,148 --> 01:10:21,150
Hey! You two!
963
01:10:21,150 --> 01:10:22,552
What are you doing down there?
964
01:10:23,720 --> 01:10:25,289
Go on, out!
965
01:10:25,289 --> 01:10:26,856
Go on! Out!
966
01:10:26,856 --> 01:10:28,825
Don't you know your own dad?
967
01:10:33,563 --> 01:10:36,566
Go on! Out! Wait for me outside!
968
01:10:37,567 --> 01:10:38,968
Now what's wrong?
969
01:10:38,968 --> 01:10:40,169
Nothing. Nothing?
970
01:10:40,169 --> 01:10:41,505
Well, what'd you break in for?
971
01:10:41,505 --> 01:10:43,239
You could have had an accident, got burned,
972
01:10:43,239 --> 01:10:44,674
broken your neck or something.
973
01:10:44,674 --> 01:10:47,277
You say it's nothing?
Now come on, what is it?
974
01:10:49,012 --> 01:10:50,947
We wanted to talk to you.
975
01:10:50,947 --> 01:10:53,283
We wanted to ask you something.
976
01:10:53,283 --> 01:10:55,184
What? Don't matter.
977
01:10:55,184 --> 01:10:58,154
Oh, that's great, isn't it?
That's typical, that is.
978
01:10:58,154 --> 01:11:00,424
Almost lose me my job
and now it don't matter.
979
01:11:00,424 --> 01:11:02,959
Now what don't? And don't say "nothing. "
980
01:11:02,959 --> 01:11:04,961
You've got a face like a horse's backside,
981
01:11:04,961 --> 01:11:07,597
and you say it's nothing.
Now come on, what is it?
982
01:11:07,597 --> 01:11:09,098
We want some money.
983
01:11:09,098 --> 01:11:10,300
Yeah, don't we all.
984
01:11:10,300 --> 01:11:11,635
Only two pounds.
985
01:11:11,635 --> 01:11:14,203
Two pounds. Why not a fiver?
986
01:11:14,203 --> 01:11:16,205
Or didn't you know
they made them that colour?
987
01:11:16,205 --> 01:11:17,907
We want to get something.
988
01:11:17,907 --> 01:11:20,243
Yeah, you're lucky
you didn't get it from me.
989
01:11:20,243 --> 01:11:21,911
Clown around here, all.
990
01:11:21,911 --> 01:11:25,281
Now how about clearing off?
Because I'm in a good mood.
991
01:11:25,281 --> 01:11:27,451
I'll see you at home.
Aren't you coming then?
992
01:11:27,451 --> 01:11:29,519
I'm still working, ain't I?
993
01:11:29,519 --> 01:11:32,155
Then I've got an appointment
at the housing.
994
01:11:32,155 --> 01:11:33,723
We wanted to talk to you.
995
01:11:33,723 --> 01:11:36,526
Well, you're talking.
And don't tell your mother.
996
01:11:36,526 --> 01:11:38,194
It's supposed to be a surprise.
997
01:11:38,194 --> 01:11:41,565
Hang on. Clear off.
I'll see you in the morning.
998
01:11:49,373 --> 01:11:50,607
( door closes )( whines )
999
01:11:50,607 --> 01:11:51,941
LIZ: Sorry we're late, mister.
1000
01:11:51,941 --> 01:11:54,544
It was our dad.
SAM: Did he give you the money?
1001
01:11:55,945 --> 01:11:59,315
Oh. No, you wouldn't be here
if he did, would you?
1002
01:11:59,315 --> 01:12:01,685
Hm. Pretty cow's milk.
1003
01:12:01,685 --> 01:12:03,920
Ought to be dog's milk.
1004
01:12:03,920 --> 01:12:06,890
No wonder she's not getting any better.
1005
01:12:06,890 --> 01:12:09,058
Here, watch it. It's hot.
1006
01:12:10,159 --> 01:12:11,895
Aren't you going out then?
1007
01:12:11,895 --> 01:12:13,296
Oh, up to your lolly, are you?
1008
01:12:13,296 --> 01:12:16,099
Aye. Aren't you going out then?
1009
01:12:16,099 --> 01:12:17,534
( chuckles )
1010
01:12:17,534 --> 01:12:20,036
It's that darn coat on down the street.
1011
01:12:20,036 --> 01:12:23,106
Old fellow there will get enough to eat.
1012
01:12:24,941 --> 01:12:26,476
I'll give you a fair warning.
1013
01:12:26,476 --> 01:12:28,378
If you're late again,
1014
01:12:28,378 --> 01:12:29,913
you'll be too late.
1015
01:12:37,454 --> 01:12:39,389
( door closes )
1016
01:12:44,360 --> 01:12:45,762
( barks )
1017
01:12:46,796 --> 01:12:48,465
Hm.
1018
01:12:53,470 --> 01:12:54,904
Didn't you go then?
1019
01:12:54,904 --> 01:12:58,508
Aye, it's me outside and me ghost in here.
1020
01:12:58,508 --> 01:13:00,577
It were raining so I didn't feel
1021
01:13:00,577 --> 01:13:02,679
like doing any dancing, you know.
1022
01:13:02,679 --> 01:13:04,614
I never do in the rain.
1023
01:13:04,614 --> 01:13:06,916
Hey. It's finished.
1024
01:13:06,916 --> 01:13:08,452
Why don't you get her some more?
1025
01:13:08,452 --> 01:13:10,754
I'll do it. Oh, no, no, I'll do it.
1026
01:13:10,754 --> 01:13:13,623
I've been managing for meself for 20 years.
1027
01:13:13,623 --> 01:13:16,793
Women's thoughts are few.
1028
01:13:16,793 --> 01:13:18,995
Everything they say and everything they do.
1029
01:13:21,164 --> 01:13:22,365
You can go out.
1030
01:13:22,365 --> 01:13:24,601
I'm staying in.
1031
01:13:27,537 --> 01:13:28,938
Wait a minute.
1032
01:13:30,507 --> 01:13:31,941
Wait a minute.
1033
01:13:39,148 --> 01:13:40,684
Sit down.
1034
01:13:40,684 --> 01:13:43,920
I've got a proposition
I'm going to make to you.
1035
01:13:46,222 --> 01:13:48,892
Get your eyes on that lot.
1036
01:14:11,014 --> 01:14:12,215
Now then.
1037
01:14:12,215 --> 01:14:14,851
How much do you still need for your dog?
1038
01:14:14,851 --> 01:14:16,853
Eh?
1039
01:14:22,559 --> 01:14:25,461
One pound,
1040
01:14:25,461 --> 01:14:27,597
1 pound 10,
1041
01:14:27,597 --> 01:14:30,099
1 pound 20,
1042
01:14:30,099 --> 01:14:32,869
1 pound 30,
1043
01:14:32,869 --> 01:14:34,103
1 pound 40.
1044
01:14:34,103 --> 01:14:37,941
Any advance on 40?
Do I hear an advance on 40?
1045
01:14:37,941 --> 01:14:41,444
One pound 50, 1 pound 60.
1046
01:14:41,444 --> 01:14:44,213
Five. Five to the lady.
1047
01:14:44,213 --> 01:14:46,750
One pound 65.
1048
01:14:47,984 --> 01:14:50,587
So that's, uh, five hours in advance
1049
01:14:50,587 --> 01:14:52,956
we'll call that, shall we?
1050
01:14:53,957 --> 01:14:56,425
Say it. No. You come back tomorrow.
1051
01:14:56,425 --> 01:14:58,628
Then we'll go and get your mongrel.
1052
01:14:58,628 --> 01:15:00,029
If you like, mister.
1053
01:15:00,029 --> 01:15:01,064
If I like?
1054
01:15:01,064 --> 01:15:02,766
Is that all you got to say?
1055
01:15:02,766 --> 01:15:04,433
Thanks, mister.
1056
01:15:04,433 --> 01:15:07,604
Now that's better.
1057
01:15:07,604 --> 01:15:09,105
All right. Off your go, then.
1058
01:15:17,213 --> 01:15:18,447
Here.
1059
01:15:18,447 --> 01:15:20,750
Hang on.
1060
01:15:22,351 --> 01:15:24,120
Here.
1061
01:15:28,157 --> 01:15:29,859
So I changed me mind.
1062
01:15:29,859 --> 01:15:33,529
I change me mind more
than you change your underwear.
1063
01:15:35,999 --> 01:15:38,534
( majestic theme playing )
1064
01:15:46,309 --> 01:15:48,077
( exhaust hissing )
1065
01:15:54,984 --> 01:15:58,221
Come on, lazy bones.
Rise and shine. Come on now.
1066
01:15:58,221 --> 01:16:01,290
Yeah, that's surprising, isn't it? Hey?
1067
01:16:01,290 --> 01:16:02,726
Did you get it? What?
1068
01:16:02,726 --> 01:16:06,195
The new house. Well, did you?
1069
01:16:06,195 --> 01:16:07,731
Now what do you think?
1070
01:16:07,731 --> 01:16:09,666
Four more weeks we say goodbye to this lot.
1071
01:16:09,666 --> 01:16:12,168
Yeah, we say goodbye to that as well.
1072
01:16:12,168 --> 01:16:14,570
Have to learn to do without that.
1073
01:16:14,570 --> 01:16:16,405
( laughs )
1074
01:16:16,405 --> 01:16:18,474
Hey, what's that for?
1075
01:16:18,474 --> 01:16:20,009
You. Did you tell Mum?
1076
01:16:20,009 --> 01:16:21,711
Yeah, we're going shopping afterwards,
1077
01:16:21,711 --> 01:16:23,212
so if you want to come you'd better hurry.
1078
01:16:23,212 --> 01:16:25,014
No, I don't think so.
She'll only shout at us.
1079
01:16:25,014 --> 01:16:27,283
Now don't be cheeky. Where are we going?
1080
01:16:27,283 --> 01:16:28,685
Washing.
1081
01:16:28,685 --> 01:16:29,986
What are we taking that for?
1082
01:16:29,986 --> 01:16:32,321
Nothing to do with you, anyway.
1083
01:16:32,321 --> 01:16:36,492
No wonder your ma goes crazy
locked up with you all day.
1084
01:16:36,492 --> 01:16:39,262
( uplifting theme playing )
1085
01:16:41,597 --> 01:16:43,199
( both laugh )
1086
01:17:26,609 --> 01:17:28,912
( barking )
1087
01:17:38,521 --> 01:17:41,124
( inaudible dialogue )
1088
01:17:41,124 --> 01:17:43,192
( "This Old Man" playing )
1089
01:18:18,394 --> 01:18:19,896
Come on, Battersea. Over.
1090
01:18:19,896 --> 01:18:21,430
Over. Go on.
1091
01:18:21,430 --> 01:18:23,666
( barks )
1092
01:18:23,666 --> 01:18:24,901
Go on.
1093
01:18:24,901 --> 01:18:26,702
Under now. Go under.
1094
01:18:26,702 --> 01:18:28,805
Go on, try it. Over.
1095
01:18:28,805 --> 01:18:30,606
Lift your legs a bit more.
1096
01:18:30,606 --> 01:18:33,743
MARK: You're supposed to go under,
not over, you silly fool.
1097
01:18:33,743 --> 01:18:35,078
LIZ: She can go under.
1098
01:18:35,078 --> 01:18:37,914
Go on, over, Battersea. Go on.
1099
01:18:37,914 --> 01:18:42,218
Now over. Try it. Come on, try it.
1100
01:18:42,218 --> 01:18:43,953
LIZ: Jump. Good. ( whimpering )
1101
01:18:43,953 --> 01:18:45,521
LIZ: Go on.
1102
01:18:45,521 --> 01:18:47,757
Now under.
1103
01:18:47,757 --> 01:18:49,325
MARK: Over. Over.
1104
01:18:49,325 --> 01:18:50,860
Under. Come on, Battersea, under.
1105
01:18:50,860 --> 01:18:52,328
Under. Under.
1106
01:18:52,328 --> 01:18:55,731
Go on. Under. That's not the way to do it.
1107
01:18:55,731 --> 01:18:58,567
I'll show you how we do it
in the circus, shall I?
1108
01:18:58,567 --> 01:19:00,403
Oh. Now come here.
1109
01:19:00,403 --> 01:19:01,905
Hold that.
1110
01:19:01,905 --> 01:19:04,774
Give us Battersea. Come here, Battersea.
1111
01:19:04,774 --> 01:19:07,844
And right, Battersea,
show it to her first, you see?
1112
01:19:07,844 --> 01:19:09,478
Now, come on. Alley-oop. That's it.
1113
01:19:09,478 --> 01:19:12,148
That's a lovely girl.
And this way. There we go.
1114
01:19:12,148 --> 01:19:14,050
Alley-oop! And again.
1115
01:19:14,050 --> 01:19:15,518
And up!( panting )
1116
01:19:15,518 --> 01:19:17,653
Now then, this is how
you teach them to beg.
1117
01:19:17,653 --> 01:19:20,456
You take a morsel of food
in the right hand.
1118
01:19:20,456 --> 01:19:21,858
Here, Battersea.
1119
01:19:21,858 --> 01:19:24,160
Hop, hop. Come on. Hop. That's it.
1120
01:19:24,160 --> 01:19:26,195
Now, now, that's a good girl.
1121
01:19:26,195 --> 01:19:28,497
Come on. What's that? What is it?
1122
01:19:28,497 --> 01:19:29,966
You see, now?
1123
01:19:29,966 --> 01:19:31,334
Look at that. See?
1124
01:19:31,334 --> 01:19:34,737
Eating out of me hand like a tame mongrel.
1125
01:19:34,737 --> 01:19:37,140
That's very good.
That's very good is that, you see?
1126
01:19:37,140 --> 01:19:39,876
Now, if I leave it, it should stay there.
1127
01:19:39,876 --> 01:19:43,379
Wait a minute. Stay there. Stay. Stay.
1128
01:19:43,379 --> 01:19:44,881
Stay. Oh!
1129
01:19:44,881 --> 01:19:46,983
Here, see? First time.
1130
01:19:46,983 --> 01:19:48,852
She fell over. I know.
1131
01:19:48,852 --> 01:19:51,821
Hey, give her a chance. She's new to it.
1132
01:19:51,821 --> 01:19:53,857
Go on. Stand up, love. That's it.
1133
01:19:53,857 --> 01:19:55,291
Stand. Stand. Stand.
1134
01:19:55,291 --> 01:19:57,927
Good girl. Good girl. Stay. Oh!
1135
01:19:57,927 --> 01:19:59,262
Look at that, see? One finger.
1136
01:19:59,262 --> 01:20:01,230
Look at that. Isn't that lovely?
1137
01:20:01,230 --> 01:20:03,399
Look at it. Look. See? Now stay.
1138
01:20:03,399 --> 01:20:05,935
Now, go, go. Come on. Come on, stay.
1139
01:20:05,935 --> 01:20:07,136
Stay.
1140
01:20:07,136 --> 01:20:08,571
It's easy, really.
1141
01:20:08,571 --> 01:20:10,339
Now I'll sit there with it
like that, you see.
1142
01:20:10,339 --> 01:20:12,675
And we'll sit and watch the river.
1143
01:20:12,675 --> 01:20:14,110
Come on sit. Sit next to her.
1144
01:20:14,110 --> 01:20:16,913
Hold the other hand.
Sit next to her like that.
1145
01:20:16,913 --> 01:20:18,647
That's it. And look out there, you see?
1146
01:20:18,647 --> 01:20:22,518
Pretend... Pretend we don't
notice that she's doing it too.
1147
01:20:22,518 --> 01:20:24,553
That's it. Isn't it lovely?
1148
01:20:34,898 --> 01:20:36,665
Leave her.
1149
01:20:36,665 --> 01:20:39,635
It's all this sunshine and fresh air.
1150
01:20:39,635 --> 01:20:41,437
Gas works on sea.
1151
01:20:41,437 --> 01:20:43,940
Do you want us to babysit for her, mister?
1152
01:20:43,940 --> 01:20:46,209
No, no.
1153
01:20:46,209 --> 01:20:49,045
Well, maybe later, I don't know.
1154
01:20:49,045 --> 01:20:50,646
A bit later.
1155
01:20:50,646 --> 01:20:52,148
Bye.
1156
01:20:52,148 --> 01:20:53,883
Bye, love. ( dog whimpering )
1157
01:20:58,922 --> 01:21:00,623
MARK: Goodbye!
1158
01:21:05,494 --> 01:21:07,897
Whose silly idea was this anyway?
1159
01:21:07,897 --> 01:21:09,532
Yours, I suppose! Oh, yeah.
1160
01:21:09,532 --> 01:21:12,201
I haven't got enough to do,
I want another stinking mess.
1161
01:21:12,201 --> 01:21:14,070
Because I want it out.
1162
01:21:14,070 --> 01:21:15,638
Well, what are you closing
the door for then?
1163
01:21:15,638 --> 01:21:17,240
Oh, so you want the whole house to hear?
1164
01:21:17,240 --> 01:21:18,841
Yeah, well, if you think I'm so stupid,
1165
01:21:18,841 --> 01:21:20,576
why not let them all know? Yeah, all right.
1166
01:21:20,576 --> 01:21:21,710
So it wasn't your idea.
1167
01:21:21,710 --> 01:21:24,080
So where'd they get the money from, hey?
1168
01:21:24,080 --> 01:21:26,082
Well, where'd you get the money from?
1169
01:21:26,082 --> 01:21:29,485
Come on, where'd you get the money from?
1170
01:21:30,886 --> 01:21:32,688
We bought it.
1171
01:21:32,688 --> 01:21:34,190
MUM: Oh, I can believe that.
1172
01:21:34,190 --> 01:21:36,092
Oh, yes, I can just believe that.
1173
01:21:36,092 --> 01:21:37,593
It was our own money. And this is my house.
1174
01:21:37,593 --> 01:21:39,295
So you can just take that right out again.
1175
01:21:39,295 --> 01:21:41,064
MUM: Come on, out.
1176
01:21:41,064 --> 01:21:42,531
I don't want any more.
1177
01:21:42,531 --> 01:21:44,167
( whimpering )Leave her, leave her!
1178
01:21:44,167 --> 01:21:46,669
Now look at that. Another rotten mess.
1179
01:21:46,669 --> 01:21:48,837
Well, it's your own fault,
pulling it about like that.
1180
01:21:48,837 --> 01:21:51,674
What do you expect the thing to do,
get up and dance for you?
1181
01:21:51,674 --> 01:21:55,311
Here, you. Go tie it up
out in the backyard. Come on.
1182
01:21:55,311 --> 01:21:56,812
And you, go get a bucket.
1183
01:21:56,812 --> 01:21:58,114
Sure.
1184
01:21:58,114 --> 01:22:01,350
Do you want me to tan your backside?
1185
01:22:01,350 --> 01:22:02,685
Hey?
1186
01:22:17,366 --> 01:22:18,567
Fascist.
1187
01:22:22,738 --> 01:22:25,975
Now listen, I'm trying to be reasonable.
1188
01:22:25,975 --> 01:22:28,344
I don't care where you got it from.
1189
01:22:28,344 --> 01:22:30,479
I just want you to take it straight back.
1190
01:22:30,479 --> 01:22:33,249
I'm not going to.
You've got your new house.
1191
01:22:33,249 --> 01:22:34,583
Now what's that got to do with it?
1192
01:22:34,583 --> 01:22:36,352
Well, why can't we keep our new dog?
1193
01:22:36,352 --> 01:22:39,188
Because you can't.
1194
01:22:39,188 --> 01:22:41,124
( whining )
1195
01:22:52,135 --> 01:22:54,737
I'm trying to explain to you.
1196
01:22:54,737 --> 01:22:56,172
Even if I said you could,
1197
01:22:56,172 --> 01:22:58,874
you can't because they don't allow them.
1198
01:22:58,874 --> 01:23:00,576
They do.
1199
01:23:00,576 --> 01:23:03,079
I'm telling you,
there's a big sign up outside
1200
01:23:03,079 --> 01:23:06,082
saying, "No animals and no pets. "
1201
01:23:06,082 --> 01:23:08,584
They do. I've seen them.
1202
01:23:08,584 --> 01:23:10,519
And wash your hands.
1203
01:23:10,519 --> 01:23:12,721
Is she calling me a liar?
1204
01:23:12,721 --> 01:23:15,024
I don't know why you bother
to even talk to them.
1205
01:23:15,024 --> 01:23:17,993
Sit down here and have your dinner.
1206
01:23:37,680 --> 01:23:41,650
The council don't allow dogs.
1207
01:23:44,453 --> 01:23:46,155
They do. We've seen them.
1208
01:23:46,155 --> 01:23:48,557
That's it! You can have your dinner
when you come back.
1209
01:23:48,557 --> 01:23:50,259
We'll soon see who's calling me a liar.
1210
01:23:50,259 --> 01:23:52,027
And if I'm right,
that bitch goes right back.
1211
01:23:52,027 --> 01:23:53,429
Do you understand?
1212
01:24:02,171 --> 01:24:04,473
( dramatic theme playing )
1213
01:24:26,662 --> 01:24:29,098
Where do you think you're going?
1214
01:24:31,334 --> 01:24:32,968
Across the river.
1215
01:24:32,968 --> 01:24:35,671
You're getting very grand
all of a sudden, ain't you?
1216
01:24:35,671 --> 01:24:38,174
We thought-- That's Westminster.
1217
01:24:41,110 --> 01:24:44,480
Well, are you coming or aren't you?
1218
01:25:07,336 --> 01:25:10,573
( truck engine sputtering )
1219
01:25:12,975 --> 01:25:15,244
Now you can read, can't you?
Now go on, read it.
1220
01:25:15,244 --> 01:25:16,745
Go on, read it. Go on.
1221
01:25:16,745 --> 01:25:19,215
"Notice to tenants-- "Yeah, yeah, go on.
1222
01:25:19,215 --> 01:25:21,584
"By order of the council-- "Yeah.
1223
01:25:21,584 --> 01:25:25,020
"in pursuance of their authority-- "
1224
01:25:25,020 --> 01:25:26,522
Yeah, go on, go on.
1225
01:25:26,522 --> 01:25:29,792
"and the section four of the Housing Act-- "
1226
01:25:29,792 --> 01:25:31,794
Go on, the next bit, the next bit.
1227
01:25:31,794 --> 01:25:33,229
Go on. "No pets-- "
1228
01:25:33,229 --> 01:25:34,563
Yeah. What? No pets.
1229
01:25:34,563 --> 01:25:36,365
Go on read it again. What?
1230
01:25:36,365 --> 01:25:37,633
"No pets-- "Yeah.
1231
01:25:37,633 --> 01:25:39,902
"of any kind-- "Yeah.
1232
01:25:39,902 --> 01:25:43,172
"to be kept, housed-- "
1233
01:25:43,172 --> 01:25:44,873
DAD: Yeah, go on. Go on.
1234
01:25:47,976 --> 01:25:50,379
( dramatic theme playing )
1235
01:25:50,379 --> 01:25:52,981
( both panting )
1236
01:25:52,981 --> 01:25:54,317
You're not coming.
1237
01:25:54,317 --> 01:25:56,919
Why can't I? Because you're not.
1238
01:26:11,967 --> 01:26:13,402
I'm coming.
1239
01:26:19,375 --> 01:26:22,345
( opera playing on Victrola )
1240
01:26:53,041 --> 01:26:55,444
I say, I say, I say.
1241
01:26:55,444 --> 01:26:58,414
What do you say? What do you say?
1242
01:26:59,515 --> 01:27:03,486
Is it cruel to stick pins in spiders?
1243
01:27:03,486 --> 01:27:07,022
Of course it's cruel
to stick spins in spiders.
1244
01:27:07,022 --> 01:27:09,825
Then can you tell me
why they sew buttons on flies?
1245
01:27:09,825 --> 01:27:13,529
I don't wish to know that.
Kindly leave the slums.
1246
01:27:20,269 --> 01:27:22,905
All right, gentlemen, from the top.
1247
01:27:22,905 --> 01:27:26,174
A one, two, three, four.
1248
01:27:26,174 --> 01:27:29,345
* Sometimes it wasn't half... *
1249
01:27:29,345 --> 01:27:30,979
( mumbling )
1250
01:27:30,979 --> 01:27:32,214
* And sometimes... *
1251
01:27:32,214 --> 01:27:34,283
That's it.
1252
01:27:34,283 --> 01:27:36,652
( whispering ):Three, four, five.
1253
01:27:42,024 --> 01:27:44,493
Eight beats rest.
1254
01:27:46,061 --> 01:27:48,263
* Sometimes... *
1255
01:27:48,263 --> 01:27:50,399
( humming )
1256
01:27:50,399 --> 01:27:51,800
* Sometimes... *
1257
01:28:00,676 --> 01:28:03,946
( rattling )Give us the dog.
1258
01:28:03,946 --> 01:28:05,681
( whimpers )
1259
01:28:21,063 --> 01:28:22,465
Oh, well.
1260
01:28:22,465 --> 01:28:23,966
Get that mangy, bloody thing
1261
01:28:23,966 --> 01:28:25,668
with a leg in each corner out of here.
1262
01:28:25,668 --> 01:28:27,470
Go on. All of you, get out.
1263
01:28:27,470 --> 01:28:28,871
Go on. Out!
1264
01:28:28,871 --> 01:28:31,874
Out of here. I want you out of here.
1265
01:28:31,874 --> 01:28:33,609
Out, out.
1266
01:28:40,015 --> 01:28:42,317
I thought I told you to go.
1267
01:28:48,056 --> 01:28:50,393
( hums )
1268
01:28:55,698 --> 01:28:57,433
We've come to live with you.
1269
01:28:58,701 --> 01:28:59,935
Why?
1270
01:29:02,738 --> 01:29:04,807
We can go basking together.
1271
01:29:07,042 --> 01:29:10,312
Really? With Samuel Hall, Samuel Hall.
1272
01:29:10,312 --> 01:29:13,682
My name is Samuel Hall, Samuel Hall.
1273
01:29:14,983 --> 01:29:17,520
My name is Samuel Hall.
1274
01:29:17,520 --> 01:29:20,589
And I hate you one and all.
1275
01:29:20,589 --> 01:29:22,791
Hate you one and all.
1276
01:29:24,159 --> 01:29:25,961
Glass in your eye.
1277
01:29:29,031 --> 01:29:32,601
She's dead, isn't she, mister?
1278
01:29:35,704 --> 01:29:38,106
Aye, she's dead. Aye.
1279
01:29:38,106 --> 01:29:40,108
She's gone.
1280
01:29:40,108 --> 01:29:41,944
Like they all do.
1281
01:29:44,947 --> 01:29:48,817
You know, when I was a little boy,
1282
01:29:48,817 --> 01:29:52,488
I come home from school one day--
1283
01:29:53,422 --> 01:29:54,623
( chuckles )
1284
01:29:54,623 --> 01:29:57,726
and I found me folks had moved.
1285
01:29:58,994 --> 01:30:02,064
They kept leaving little hints
1286
01:30:02,064 --> 01:30:05,901
like wrapping me lunch up in a road map.
1287
01:30:05,901 --> 01:30:08,070
You know.
1288
01:30:12,274 --> 01:30:14,109
Go on.
1289
01:30:14,109 --> 01:30:15,878
Out of the house.
1290
01:30:15,878 --> 01:30:18,013
I don't want no more
of you or your mongrel.
1291
01:30:18,013 --> 01:30:19,948
Go on, out.
1292
01:30:21,850 --> 01:30:24,119
I thought we could share her, mister.
1293
01:30:24,119 --> 01:30:25,454
It was your money.
1294
01:30:25,454 --> 01:30:27,756
You could teach her a few tricks.
1295
01:30:29,992 --> 01:30:32,528
Tricks, yeah.
1296
01:30:32,528 --> 01:30:34,429
After the funeral.
1297
01:30:35,197 --> 01:30:36,732
Funeral.
1298
01:30:36,732 --> 01:30:39,602
LIZ: You're lying, aren't you, mister?
1299
01:30:39,602 --> 01:30:41,837
There's not going to be
no funeral, is there?
1300
01:30:41,837 --> 01:30:44,740
Lying?
1301
01:30:44,740 --> 01:30:48,276
Oh, lying-- Lying in state...
1302
01:30:48,276 --> 01:30:52,915
Lying in state now we get
shiny trumpets, you know.
1303
01:30:52,915 --> 01:30:54,116
And flowers?
1304
01:30:55,317 --> 01:30:57,452
Yeah, bells.
1305
01:30:57,452 --> 01:30:59,154
Canterbury bells.
1306
01:31:02,357 --> 01:31:04,760
It's a discount for Bella.
1307
01:31:04,760 --> 01:31:08,130
Discount for this one.
1308
01:31:11,133 --> 01:31:14,402
You've seen them, you know.
They dump it all in barges.
1309
01:31:14,402 --> 01:31:18,741
Take it out to sea
and that's the end of it.
1310
01:31:20,475 --> 01:31:23,946
They give you a couple of glasses.
1311
01:31:23,946 --> 01:31:27,049
Drink that up with the compliments
of the management.
1312
01:31:27,049 --> 01:31:30,018
Because you're going under. Heh, heh.
1313
01:31:31,854 --> 01:31:36,258
Oh, aye, there's going to be
a big funeral, all right.
1314
01:31:36,258 --> 01:31:37,560
In Hyde Park?
1315
01:31:37,560 --> 01:31:39,528
Aye, in Hyde Park, aye.
1316
01:31:39,528 --> 01:31:41,096
It's only been closed 100 years.
1317
01:31:41,096 --> 01:31:43,165
They're bound to open up for me.
1318
01:31:43,165 --> 01:31:44,533
For old Sam.
1319
01:31:44,533 --> 01:31:48,604
I mean, me being the common man, you know.
1320
01:31:53,576 --> 01:31:57,279
Counsel and servant of the Queen.
1321
01:32:03,251 --> 01:32:05,020
Is that what you want?
1322
01:32:05,020 --> 01:32:07,956
Is that what you want, is it?
1323
01:32:09,725 --> 01:32:11,594
It's all gone.
1324
01:32:11,594 --> 01:32:14,196
Go on, turn around.
1325
01:32:20,102 --> 01:32:25,608
* Champagne Charlie is me name *
1326
01:32:25,608 --> 01:32:30,746
* Champagne Charlie is me name *
1327
01:32:31,947 --> 01:32:34,449
* Game for anything and... *
1328
01:32:34,449 --> 01:32:36,051
( humming )
1329
01:32:38,520 --> 01:32:40,756
( "Champagne Charlie" playing )
1330
01:32:48,764 --> 01:32:50,599
No peeking now.
1331
01:33:03,812 --> 01:33:05,513
If you don't find me here when I come back,
1332
01:33:05,513 --> 01:33:08,483
it's because I don't want you here.
Understand?
1333
01:33:08,483 --> 01:33:11,053
No funeral, not like this.
1334
01:33:11,053 --> 01:33:13,055
* A sailor was saying farewell
To his horse *
1335
01:33:13,055 --> 01:33:15,057
* He was saying farewell, Cheerio *
1336
01:33:15,057 --> 01:33:19,527
* Oh, a goodbye Mary
I'm going away to sea *
1337
01:33:19,527 --> 01:33:23,632
* I'm going away to sea to sea
To see what I can see *
1338
01:33:23,632 --> 01:33:25,300
* And when I come back, Mary *
1339
01:33:25,300 --> 01:33:27,502
* And you'll fill me
With delight *
1340
01:33:27,502 --> 01:33:29,972
* So it's goodbye forever *
1341
01:33:29,972 --> 01:33:31,974
* I'll be back tomorrow night *
1342
01:33:31,974 --> 01:33:34,342
* Diddly dum-dum-dum *
1343
01:33:34,342 --> 01:33:36,879
( humming )
1344
01:33:43,686 --> 01:33:46,288
( clattering )( whistle blows )
1345
01:33:49,925 --> 01:33:51,794
It's nothing.
1346
01:33:51,794 --> 01:33:53,929
I just slipped.
1347
01:33:58,400 --> 01:34:01,837
Not enough sawdust.
1348
01:34:04,372 --> 01:34:06,608
Mind yourself.
1349
01:34:06,608 --> 01:34:09,745
We're not supposed to be here.
He doesn't want us.
1350
01:34:09,745 --> 01:34:12,915
Ew. He will if there's a funeral.
1351
01:34:12,915 --> 01:34:14,649
He doesn't want a funeral.
1352
01:34:14,649 --> 01:34:18,220
He does. He's just a little bit
upset, that's all.
1353
01:34:26,895 --> 01:34:29,698
( "Champagne Charlie" playing )
1354
01:34:31,533 --> 01:34:32,735
You mustn't.
1355
01:34:32,735 --> 01:34:35,904
Got to, for the bus.
1356
01:34:35,904 --> 01:34:37,239
Put this back.
1357
01:34:37,239 --> 01:34:40,743
I'm going to write him a note explaining.
1358
01:34:52,520 --> 01:34:55,390
I say, I say, I say.
1359
01:34:55,390 --> 01:34:57,092
What would you like, sir?
1360
01:34:57,092 --> 01:34:58,126
Hm?
1361
01:34:58,126 --> 01:35:00,462
I'll have a large, I say.
1362
01:35:14,209 --> 01:35:16,344
Well?
1363
01:35:16,344 --> 01:35:18,213
Nothing.
1364
01:35:18,213 --> 01:35:20,382
Not a sign.
1365
01:35:20,382 --> 01:35:22,650
Well, he must have said something.
1366
01:35:22,650 --> 01:35:23,952
Nothing, I told you.
1367
01:35:23,952 --> 01:35:25,620
( James crying )
1368
01:35:25,620 --> 01:35:26,989
Oh, shut him up.
1369
01:35:26,989 --> 01:35:30,926
Feed him or whatever it is you have to do.
1370
01:35:30,926 --> 01:35:33,762
They'll be home when they're hungry.
1371
01:35:38,666 --> 01:35:40,969
Where the hell did they get
the little bleeder anyway?
1372
01:35:40,969 --> 01:35:42,737
Oh, I thought that was
supposed to be my fault.
1373
01:35:42,737 --> 01:35:44,306
Oh, don't be so dramatic.
1374
01:35:44,306 --> 01:35:46,441
What difference does it make
where they got it from, eh?
1375
01:35:46,441 --> 01:35:48,110
The kids could be dead in Oxford Lane.
1376
01:35:48,110 --> 01:35:49,845
And all you think about
is their bloody dog.
1377
01:35:49,845 --> 01:35:51,246
Well, what do you expect me to do?
1378
01:35:51,246 --> 01:35:53,381
Go traipsing around
the bloody streets all night?
1379
01:35:53,381 --> 01:35:56,151
Yes, I do.
1380
01:35:56,151 --> 01:35:58,954
( eerie theme playing )
1381
01:36:26,681 --> 01:36:29,184
Are you coming?
1382
01:36:30,385 --> 01:36:32,988
Give us it then.
1383
01:36:36,258 --> 01:36:37,692
( cat meowing )
1384
01:36:37,692 --> 01:36:39,962
Cowardy. I'm not.
1385
01:36:39,962 --> 01:36:42,397
Coming?
1386
01:36:42,397 --> 01:36:45,433
Nothing to be frightened of.
1387
01:36:45,433 --> 01:36:48,036
( bird cawing )
1388
01:36:54,910 --> 01:36:57,112
( indistinct chatter )
1389
01:36:57,112 --> 01:36:58,546
How's things?
1390
01:36:58,546 --> 01:37:01,016
Getting terrible.
1391
01:37:01,016 --> 01:37:04,086
Oh, go on. ( whimpering )
1392
01:37:08,323 --> 01:37:10,926
( whimpering )
1393
01:37:53,568 --> 01:37:56,171
( cat meowing )
1394
01:37:57,205 --> 01:37:58,941
MARK:I don't like it.
1395
01:37:58,941 --> 01:38:01,576
It's only because you haven't eaten.
1396
01:38:01,576 --> 01:38:03,745
It's just dark and dead dogs.
1397
01:38:03,745 --> 01:38:06,114
It can't hurt you.
1398
01:38:06,114 --> 01:38:09,351
Where are we going to bury it?
1399
01:38:09,351 --> 01:38:10,785
Over there?
1400
01:38:10,785 --> 01:38:13,488
No, they'll see us.
1401
01:38:21,063 --> 01:38:23,165
( yawning )
1402
01:38:46,888 --> 01:38:48,490
Here, here.
1403
01:38:48,490 --> 01:38:50,658
They tell me you've been
hanging around with my kids.
1404
01:38:50,658 --> 01:38:53,061
And don't say you haven't,
because they've seen you.
1405
01:38:53,061 --> 01:38:54,796
And what about this note, eh?
1406
01:38:54,796 --> 01:38:56,231
Eh? Oh.
1407
01:38:56,231 --> 01:38:57,499
Now don't muck about.
1408
01:38:57,499 --> 01:38:59,001
I asked you, where are they?
1409
01:38:59,001 --> 01:39:02,004
Where are they?
1410
01:39:14,416 --> 01:39:15,850
How did you find him?
1411
01:39:15,850 --> 01:39:17,585
A fellow in a pub.
1412
01:39:17,585 --> 01:39:20,155
Hey, what do you reckon to his story?
1413
01:39:20,155 --> 01:39:22,090
Well, I seen him around.
1414
01:39:22,090 --> 01:39:23,325
I'll tell you this.
1415
01:39:23,325 --> 01:39:25,060
If anything's happened to my kids...
1416
01:39:25,060 --> 01:39:28,963
If there's a spare plot in your cemetery,
I'm going to bury him.
1417
01:39:53,588 --> 01:39:56,591
Me-la-nie.
1418
01:39:56,591 --> 01:39:58,760
Melanie.
1419
01:40:14,776 --> 01:40:16,911
Come on, grandpa.
1420
01:40:16,911 --> 01:40:18,846
On your way, sailor.
1421
01:40:18,846 --> 01:40:22,084
Come on. I told you.
1422
01:40:24,586 --> 01:40:28,223
People down there trying to sleep.
1423
01:40:28,223 --> 01:40:31,126
I'll set her on you.
1424
01:40:31,126 --> 01:40:33,895
Oh, oh, oh.
1425
01:40:33,895 --> 01:40:35,297
Oh, now what?
1426
01:40:35,297 --> 01:40:37,065
It's like burst veins.
1427
01:40:37,065 --> 01:40:39,000
I can't stand up.
1428
01:40:39,000 --> 01:40:41,203
I can't stand up.
1429
01:40:41,203 --> 01:40:43,805
( upbeat theme playing )
1430
01:40:58,820 --> 01:41:01,189
Hey, get off my bike!
1431
01:41:24,212 --> 01:41:27,582
Nice night for a walk.
1432
01:41:29,651 --> 01:41:32,287
DAD: Is this the place?
POLICE: Come on, grandpa.
1433
01:41:32,287 --> 01:41:34,156
UNDERTAKER: I'll just unlock the gates.
1434
01:41:34,156 --> 01:41:36,258
Here, you look after her.
1435
01:41:36,258 --> 01:41:38,593
Oh, you're worried about her now, eh?
1436
01:41:38,593 --> 01:41:41,062
Look mate, if this is
a wild goose chase...
1437
01:41:41,062 --> 01:41:42,830
( Sam mumbling indistinctly )
1438
01:41:42,830 --> 01:41:44,299
Come on, forget it.
1439
01:41:44,299 --> 01:41:47,335
Wild geese, very tasty.
1440
01:41:47,335 --> 01:41:49,771
I like a nice goose.
1441
01:41:53,741 --> 01:41:56,878
It's the hair that keeps them warm.
1442
01:41:56,878 --> 01:41:59,914
You must be lovely and cosy.
1443
01:41:59,914 --> 01:42:01,549
Oh.
1444
01:42:06,721 --> 01:42:09,123
Oh, what a stupid place
for him to bring the kids.
1445
01:42:09,123 --> 01:42:11,593
UNDERTAKER: Oh, he shouldn't
have brought them in, in here.
1446
01:42:11,593 --> 01:42:14,128
Honestly, when I get my hands
on those two, I'll...
1447
01:42:14,128 --> 01:42:16,231
Oh, I don't know.
1448
01:42:24,772 --> 01:42:26,974
There's nothing more we can do here.
1449
01:42:26,974 --> 01:42:29,143
Well, what about the note
I left for them out there?
1450
01:42:29,143 --> 01:42:30,445
Well, they could be lost anywhere.
1451
01:42:30,445 --> 01:42:31,679
The park's a big place.
1452
01:42:31,679 --> 01:42:34,449
No use hanging around here.
1453
01:42:37,885 --> 01:42:40,355
POLICE: Anything? Nothing.
1454
01:42:40,355 --> 01:42:41,756
What do you want to do?
1455
01:42:41,756 --> 01:42:44,459
Looks as if he's settled in for the night.
1456
01:42:44,459 --> 01:42:47,495
I'll stick around a bit just in case.
1457
01:42:47,495 --> 01:42:49,431
If you could get a message to the wife.
1458
01:42:49,431 --> 01:42:52,133
Do you want me to stay around?
1459
01:42:52,133 --> 01:42:54,469
No, no, I'll be all right.
1460
01:42:54,469 --> 01:42:57,505
I wish you joy of him.
1461
01:43:07,014 --> 01:43:08,450
Oh, it's you, is it?
1462
01:43:08,450 --> 01:43:11,386
What makes you think they're coming back?
1463
01:43:12,287 --> 01:43:14,556
I don't think, mate.
1464
01:43:14,556 --> 01:43:17,559
They're your kids, not mine.
1465
01:43:31,973 --> 01:43:33,908
You're staying awake.
1466
01:43:33,908 --> 01:43:36,844
I asked you something.
1467
01:43:38,946 --> 01:43:41,215
You're very strong, aren't you?
1468
01:43:41,215 --> 01:43:43,785
Very strong.
1469
01:43:43,785 --> 01:43:47,255
Must be all that hard work you do.
1470
01:43:47,255 --> 01:43:49,491
What for?
1471
01:43:49,491 --> 01:43:51,693
People like you who bring
kids into the world,
1472
01:43:51,693 --> 01:43:54,529
don't know what they're all about.
1473
01:43:54,529 --> 01:43:57,632
All you can say is, "No, no, you can't. "
1474
01:43:57,632 --> 01:44:01,303
"No, don't do that.
Don't do that, you can't. "
1475
01:44:01,303 --> 01:44:02,904
You can.
1476
01:44:02,904 --> 01:44:06,140
That's what it's all about, mate. You can.
1477
01:44:06,140 --> 01:44:09,076
It's not filling their bellies up
with the bread and butter.
1478
01:44:09,076 --> 01:44:11,413
What about a bit of bread
and butter up here?
1479
01:44:11,413 --> 01:44:14,349
That's where they need it, you know.
1480
01:44:14,349 --> 01:44:16,951
A little bit of the old glass ball.
1481
01:44:16,951 --> 01:44:18,420
A bit of magic.
1482
01:44:18,420 --> 01:44:21,689
A bit of dream boats going on in here.
1483
01:44:23,124 --> 01:44:26,628
Tell a person like you that,
I may as well tell them
1484
01:44:26,628 --> 01:44:28,696
to clean their teeth
with a whitewash brush.
1485
01:44:28,696 --> 01:44:32,834
Now look here, if you interfere
with my needs again,
1486
01:44:32,834 --> 01:44:35,136
I'll give you a swift kick in the gobbles
1487
01:44:35,136 --> 01:44:38,306
that'll bring tears
to your eyes, twice nightly.
1488
01:44:38,306 --> 01:44:45,513
All right. I'm throwing in
the curtains and going to kip.
1489
01:45:51,145 --> 01:45:53,047
( Battersea barks )
1490
01:45:58,520 --> 01:46:01,122
( upbeat theme playing )
1491
01:46:24,646 --> 01:46:27,682
Where the hell have you been?
1492
01:46:34,355 --> 01:46:36,991
Come on.
1493
01:46:36,991 --> 01:46:40,161
Your mum's worried sick about you.
1494
01:47:26,273 --> 01:47:28,876
( birds chirping )
1495
01:47:59,907 --> 01:48:02,710
( tender theme playing )
1496
01:48:30,805 --> 01:48:34,742
Quick, catch up. They're getting away.
1497
01:48:34,742 --> 01:48:37,311
When I grow up, I want to be a soldier.
1498
01:48:37,311 --> 01:48:38,512
Why, you like fighting?
1499
01:48:38,512 --> 01:48:41,983
No, I just want a horse.
98344
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