All language subtitles for Cupid s01e06_English

(static)

(man) I'VE PLAYED LOU REED,
JIMMY REED, EVEN JERRY REED...

R.E.M., PiL, XTC...

AND NOW...

THEY'RE PAVING PARADISE.

THREE HOURS AGO, THIS STATION
OFFICIALLY BECAME THE PROPERTY

OF AN ENORMOUS,
FACELESS CONGLOMERATE...

(pounds on door)
AND NOW MY STATION MANAGER IS
TRYING TO BEAT DOWN THE DOOR

AS I HAVE DECIDED TO IGNORE

THE FOCUS-GROUPED,
MARKET-TESTED PLAYLIST

PROVIDED BY
OUR NEW CORPORATE MASTERS.

AH.

I'M JACK KOZAKOWSKI,

AND I PLAY WHAT I WANT...

AT LEAST FOR A FEW MORE HOURS.

(mouths word)

THERE IS SOMEONE
I NEED TO HEAR FROM--

MY FAVORITE CALLER...

BECAUSE AS SOON
AS WE START TO PLAY...

(smarmy voice) ALL THE HITS...

(normal voice)
SHE IS NEVER GOING TO LISTEN

TO THIS STATION AGAIN.

SO IF YOU'RE LISTENING,

SWEET JANE, CALL ME.

YES, I CALLED IN
A TO GO ORDER.

AS YOU PREDICTED, I'M NOW
JONESING FOR FELIX'S MOLE SAUCE

ON A DAILY BASIS.

YOU MADE MY PASSION

FOR THESE LITTLE SLABS OF WAX
AND ACETATE EVEN GREATER.

PLEASE LET ME, ONE LAST TIME,

JUST PLAY
WHATEVER YOUR HEART DESIRES.

WHAT ARE WE LISTENING TO?
TUT-TUT-TUT.

THE SOONER THE BETTER, JANE.

ALL I GOT HERE IS
A GRANOLA BAR.

THE BASTARDS
ARE GONNA STARVE ME OUT.

♪♪

OKAY, I PUT AN EXTRA CONTAINER
OF MOLE SAUCE IN HERE.

YOU WILL BE TEMPTED TO DRINK IT.
I RECOMMEND YOU DON'T.

(chuckles)
TREVOR, THAT'S MY MOLE.
GET HER ANYTHING SHE WANTS,
ON ME.

I GOT A MATCH TO MAKE.

HUH.

I GUESS
I'LL JUST COVER HIS SHIFT...

AND FEED HIS PSYCHIATRIST.

CLOSING TIME.

LAST CALL FOR DRINKS.

I APPRECIATE THE SUPPORT.

I DO.
I HAVE RECEIVED DOZENS OF CALLS,

JUST NOT THE ONE I WANTED.

OH, AND LOOK AT THAT.

A CALL ON THE BATPHONE.

YOU'RE ON WITH JACK.

(woman) Hi, Jack.

SWEET JANE. (laughs)

I KNEW YOU'D TURN UP.

HAVE YOU CALLED
WITH A REQUEST?

"Build Havana"
by Future Clouds and Radar.

MY FAVORITE SONG
BY ONE OF MY FAVORITE ARTISTS.

Robert Harrison,
the Elvis of artsy power pop.

I SUPPOSE I SHOULD
JUST LAY IT ON THE LINE.

WE BOTH KNOW THAT

YOU'RE NEVER GONNA LISTEN
TO THIS SHOW AGAIN AFTER TODAY.

UH... THIS IS OUR LAST CALL.

LET'S MEET, FACE-TO-FACE.

WE'VE GOT SOMETHING HERE,
JANE, SOMETHING RARE.

I'm sorry, Jack. I can't.

(line disconnects)

(dial tone)

("Build Havana" playing)

♪ SHE GETS SO BROKEN UP,
SHE CAN'T MEND ♪

♪ AND I GET SO BLOWN AWAY,
I CAN'T UNDERSTAND ♪

YOU CROSSED A LINE TODAY,
JACK.
(scoffs)

CORPORATE IS
GONNA HAVE YOUR HEAD.

WE BOTH KNOW
THAT'S NOT HAPPENING, SUSSMAN.

I'M THE GINGER ROGERS
TO CORPORATE'S FRED ASTAIRE.

THEY GIVE ME A PAYCHECK,
AND I GIVE 'EM CLASS.
(record needle scratches)

(woman)
♪ I WANNA BE WITH YOU TONIGHT ♪

TOMORROW THEN.

OH.

OH, IT'S YOU. FOOD GUY.
(chuckles)

FOOD GUY/LOVE DETECTIVE.

I'M GONNA HELP YOU
FIND SWEET JANE.

(mouth full) THIS IS HOW
I THOUGHT MY DAY WOULD GO--

GET SHOT DOWN BY MY DREAM GIRL
ON THE RADIO

AND THEN BRING SOME STRANGE DUDE
BACK TO MY APARTMENT

TO BINGE ON MEXICAN FOOD...

THAT'S APPARENTLY LACED
WITH CRACK.
SHE WASN'T SHOOTING YOU DOWN.

SHE WAS FLIRTING WITH YOU.
YOU'RE HIGH. I'VE BEEN
FLIRTING WITH SWEET JANE

ON THE REQUEST LINE
FOR FIVE YEARS.

I KNOW WHAT FLIRTING
SOUNDS LIKE.

TODAY--
THAT WAS SHOOTING DOWN.

WHAT IF SHE'D HAD SAID,
"YEAH, LET'S MEET"?

WHAT WAS THE PLAN THEN?
THAT'S THE POINT.
I WOULDN'T NEED A PLAN.

WE'RE THE SAME PERSON.
WE HAVE THE SAME TASTE.

ALL THE THINGS THAT I LOVE
TO DO--GOING OUT, SEEING BANDS,

TRAVELING, YOU KNOW,
LOUNGING AROUND ON WEEKENDS,

LISTENING TO RECORDS,
TALKING ABOUT MUSIC--

SHE WOULD HAVE BEEN
MY PARTNER IN CRIME.

THIS IS THE ONLY TANGIBLE THING
I HAVE FROM HER.

SHE SENT IT TO THE STATION
A WHILE BACK.
A 45?

NO, NOT JUST ANY 45.

OTIS REDDING--

"YOU LEFT
THE WATER RUNNING"...

RELEASED POSTHUMOUSLY.

THERE WAS NO RETURN ADDRESS
ON THE ENVELOPE. I CHECKED.

WELL, WE NOW KNOW
HOW TO FIND HER.

HOW'S THAT?

WELL, BECAUSE, DEAR WATSON,

WE NOW KNOW
THAT SHE'S THE TYPE OF GIRL

THAT FORGETS TO TAKE
THE PRICE TAG OFF GIFTS.

VINYL COUNTDOWN--

THAT'S IN QUEENS.

I HAVE THE AFTERNOON FREE.
YOU?

(soul music playing)

"YOU LEFT
THE WATER RUNNING"--

'76, A TINY MEMPHIS LABEL
RELEASED IT,

BUT NOBODY BOTHERED TO CLEAR IT
WITH OTIS REDDING'S ESTATE.

THE LAWYERS PULLED IT AND BOOM!
INSTANT COLLECTOR'S ITEM.

THIS PLACE IS
A TREASURE TROVE.

WHY DON'T
YOU GET MORE TRAFFIC?

BECAUSE WE DON'T CARRY ANYTHING
RELEASED AFTER AUGUST 1st, 1981.

WHY AUGUST 198--

BLACK SATURDAY.
IT'S THE DAY MTV PREMIERED.

AS YOU CAN SEE,
RIGHTEOUS LINES IN THE SAND

DON'T MAKE FOR OUTSTANDING
BUSINESS MODELS.

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA

WHAT WOMAN BOUGHT THIS FROM YOU
TWO YEARS AGO?
HOLD ON.

LET ME CHECK MY EXTENSIVE
COMPUTER DATABASE OF PURCHASES.

NO IDEA.

SHE PREFERS
ATLANTIC RECORDS SOUL TO MOTOWN.

HER FAVORITE CLASH ALBUM IS
"SANDINISTA."

"SANDINISTA."
AH, OKAY, RINGING A BELL.

THERE'S A WOMAN
WHO USED TO COME HERE.

NAME? SOUNDS LIKE?

STARTS WITH?

YEAH. UM...
I GOT NOTHING.

WAIT. SHE'D STOP IN AFTER WORK
SOMETIMES.

WORE A SMOCK THING
FROM, UH...

FROM...

(mouths word)

(The Service Industry's
"Bookstores and Restaurants"

playing)

GROCERY TOWN.
SHE'S HERE. I KNOW IT.

HOW?
THEY'RE PLAYING
THE SERVICE INDUSTRY.

MUCH HYPED INDIE POWER POP BAND
OUT OF AUSTIN?

YOU KNOW, INSTEAD OF MUZAK?

(woman) PRICE CHECK
FOR MAMA PAVIA SPAGHETTI SAUCE.

♪ BOOKSTORES AND RESTAURANTS ♪

♪ BOOKSTORES AND RESTAURANTS ♪

(beep)

SWEET JANE?

♪♪

YOUR NAMETAG
MIGHT SAY "SARAH,"

BUT I'D KNOW YOUR VOICE
ANYWHERE.

OH, GOD.

WHY'D YOU HAVE TO FIND ME?
THIS RUINS EVERYTHING.

♪ BOOKSTORES AND RESTAURANTS ♪

♪♪

I...

SUPPOSE I, UH,

WAS HOPING
FOR A SLIGHTLY MORE, UM,

I DON'T KNOW, UM,

ENTHUSIASTIC, MAYBE, RESPONSE.

I THOUGHT WE'D HAVE SOMETHING
LIKE WE HAVE ON THE RADIO.

WHAT WE HAD ON THE RADIO
WAS GREAT,

BUT I ALREADY HAVE TOO MANY MEN
IN MY LIFE.

(woman over P.A.)
MANAGER TO REGISTER SIX.

LOOK, I GOTTA GO.
I'M SORRY, JACK.

I JUST--I HAD YOU FILED

IN A VERY SPECIFIC PLACE
IN MY LIFE.

IT WORKED FOR ME.

WELL, I'LL JUST LEAVE THEN.

YEAH,
WITH MY DIGNITY SHATTERED.

IT'S... IT'S COOL.

IT'S...

WELL, I GUESS IT'S TRUE.

I DO HAVE
A FACE MADE FOR RADIO.

BUT I GUESS
IF IT DIDN'T HURT,

PEOPLE WOULDN'T WRITE SONGS
ABOUT IT

OR TAKE THE QUICK ROUTE TO
THE TOP OF THE LIBRARY TOWER.
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.
YOU'RE RUNNING UP THE WHITE FLAG

WHEN OUR TROOPS
CAN STILL TAKE THE HILL.

ONCE MORE TO THE BREACH.
YOU HEARD WHAT SHE SAID.
TOO MANY MEN IN HER LIFE?

YEAH, SEE,
I SEE THAT AS AN OPENING.

SHE'S NOT CURRENTLY EXCLUSIVE
WITH ANYONE.

AT LEAST WE KNOW
OUR TASK AT HAND.

I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M SAYING THIS,
BUT I'M LISTENING.

A FEW OF YOU HAVE EXPRESSED
YOUR DESIRE

FOR OUR MEETING TO FOCUS MORE
ON MEETING SINGLES

RATHER THAN JUST TALKING ABOUT
BEING SINGLE.

YES!
TOWARD THAT END, I'D LIKE
TO SET UP SIMPLE COFFEE DATES

FOR ANY OF YOU WHO ARE WILLING
TO BRAVE BEING SET UP.

YES!
I'LL BE E-MAILING EACH OF YOU

AN ONLINE QUESTIONNAIRE
THAT I'M DEVELOPING

FOR DATEWELL, A NEW INTERNET
MATCHMAKING SERVICE.

NO. CLAIRE, COMPUTERS ARE FOR
MULTIPLAYER ROLE-PLAYING GAMES

AND POSTING FUNNY VIDEOS
OF YOUR CAT.

THEY CAN'T FIND SOMEONE
A SOUL MATE.

THEY CAN IDENTIFY
INTERESTS PEOPLE SHARE

SO THEY DON'T WASTE THEIR TIME
WITH INCOMPATIBLE PARTNERS.

I NEED A FEW GOOD MEN
AND WOMEN--100 OF EACH--

TO BE GUINEA PIGS.

SO WE HAVE TO HAVE COFFEE
WITH A HUNDRED MEN?

NO.

JUST WITH THE PERSON
YOU'RE MATCHED WITH.

AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO.
IT'S COMPLETELY VOLUNTARY.

ARE YOU GETTING THIS?

DID SAMSON AND DELILAH
NEED A COMPUTER?

DID BRAD AND JEN?
DID YOUR PARENTS?

ARE YOU SURE THESE ARE
THE EXAMPLES YOU WANT TO USE?

WE'RE WILLING TO PUT SO MUCH

INTO THE HANDS
OF THESE MACHINES.

WHERE DOES IT END?

WHEN DO WE SAY "NO MORE"?

WHEN DO WE, LIKE, JOHN HENRY,
TAKE HAMMER IN HAND

AND BEAT
THAT STEAM ENGINE DOWN?

RIGHT NOW WE CAN SAY,
"NO, THANKS, COMPUTERS.

I GOT IT COVERED HERE."
OTHERWISE, SOON ENOUGH,

WE'RE ALL THOSE LITTLE FAT
PEOPLE AT THE END OF "WALL-E."

SO WHO'S WITH ME?

WHO WILL JOIN ME IN SAYING,
"ENOUGH IS ENOUGH"?

(Claire) LET'S ASK.

HOW MANY OF YOU ARE GAME
TO TRY DATEWELL?

PROPER MATCHMAKING REQUIRES
A BOUTIQUE ATTENTION TO DETAIL.

OKAY? LIKE JACK ON THE RADIO
THIS MORNING?

I'M MATCHING HIM
WITH A GIRL HE'D NEVER SEEN.

CAN YOU DIG IT?
LOVE AT FIRST SOUND.

COMPUTERS CAN'T DO THAT.
THE QUESTIONNAIRE I'M DEVELOPING
WOULD HAVE DISCOVERED

THE SAME CONNECTION
BUT WITH MUCH LESS DRAMA.

I GOT LOCKED UP FOR SUGGESTING
THAT I HAVE A DIVINE GIFT

FOR DOING EXACTLY
WHAT YOU'RE TRYING TO DO.
YOU GOT LOCKED UP
FOR THE "DIVINITY" PART,

NOT THE "GIFT" PART,
AND I DON'T CLAIM OMNISCIENCE.

I'M MEETING
WITH A STATISTICIAN

WHO'S HELPING ME
CRUNCH THE NUMBERS.
STATISTICIAN?
THIS IS WHAT WE'VE COME TO?

YOU ACTUALLY BELIEVE
THAT YOU AND SOME NERD

CAN DO GOD'S WORK?

AHEM. HI.

I'M THE, UH, NERD.
(laughs)

PETER KARNOW. IT'S GREAT
TO FINALLY MEET YOU, DR. McCRAE.

I READ YOUR BOOK.

YOUR WORK ON PERSONALITY
SIGN POSTING IS DEAD-ON.

WELL, THANK YOU.
THAT'S--THAT'S VERY KIND.

AND PLEASE, CALL ME CLAIRE.
(Trevor) AHEM.

THIS IS TREVOR.
HE'S A STEEL-DRIVING MAN

WHO HAS AN IMPORTANT APPOINTMENT
WHICH WILL SADLY CUT SHORT

HIS ABILITY TO STAY AND CHAT.

REALLY? I HAVE TO GO?
'CAUSE I WANTED TO BE HERE

WHEN YOU PULLED OUT YOUR
CALCULATOR AND QUANTIFIED LOVE.

GOOD NIGHT, TREVOR.

I'M SIGNING UP, BY THE WAY.
I HOPE MY DATE LIKES PI.

AND BY PI, I MEAN THE RELATION

OF MY CIRCUMFERENCE
TO MY DIAMETER.

WOW.

YEAH. (laughs)

THANK YOU SO MUCH
FOR MEETING ME HERE TONIGHT.

THIS WILL BE VERY HELPFUL.
YEAH, IT WILL BE. I MET
WITH KELSEY STANZLER EARLIER,

AND WE COVERED
A LOT OF GROUND.
KELSEY STANZLER,
THE ADVICE COLUMNIST

FROM "THE VILLAGE VOICE"?

I DIDN'T REALIZE DATEWELL WAS
USING MORE THAN ONE EXPERT.

YOU'RE COVERING
COMMON INTEREST AND VALUES,

AND SHE'S ALL ABOUT
ATTRACTION AND DESIRE,

WHICH CAN BE IMPORTANT AS WELL,
DON'T YOU THINK?

SOMETIMES THOSE THINGS
CAN'T BE OVERLOOKED.

THE KEITH TO JACK'S MICK.

WE WERE NEVER
FORMALLY INTRODUCED.

THE NAME'S TREVOR, AND THAT
CHOCOLATE BAR'S DEFECTIVE.

YOU MEAN IT'S STALE?
NO, I WAS HOPING
FOR A GOLDEN TICKET.

INSTEAD THERE'S SOMETHING
WRITTEN INSIDE THE WRAPPER.
I REALLY DON'T HAVE TIME
FOR THIS.

COME ON. JUST GO WITH IT.

YOU EVER DO
A SCAVENGER HUNT?

YOU KNOW,
WHERE YOU FOLLOW THE CLUES?
I'M FAMILIAR WITH THE CONCEPT.

THIS ONE'S HERE,
IN THIS MARKET.

IT'LL LEAD YOU TO JACK.

"WHAT'S THE BEST PRINCE SONG
OF THE EIGHTIES?"

"RASPBERRY BERET."

SORBET, BERET.

"THE GREATEST 2:00 A.M. ALBUM
EVER."

"VELVET UNDERGROUND & NICO."

AND ON THE COVER THERE'S A...

"THE GREATEST POSTHUMOUSLY
RELEASED SONG OF ALL TIME."

EASY ONE. OTIS REDDING, "SITTING
ON THE DOCK OF THE BAY."

(rock music playing)

(Jack)
♪ SARAH'S IN THE SUPERMARKET ♪

♪ THINKING I LIKE HER A LOT ♪

♪ EVEN IF I ONLY MET HER ♪

♪ WOULD REALLY LIKE
TO KNOW HER BETTER ♪

♪ THINKING WE SHOULD GO
ON A DATE ♪

♪ SOMEWHERE NICE,
SOMEWHERE GREAT ♪

♪ PLEASE, SARAH,
DON'T MAKE ME WAIT ♪

HA!
♪ HOW ABOUT DRINKS? ♪

(music stops)
WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT
SKATING BACK HERE?

SORRY, MOM.
MY BAD.

THE MEN IN YOUR LIFE.

YEP. SO, JACK, STILL WANT
TO GO ON THAT DATE?

(Trevor sighs)

I'M ON IT.

(chuckles) I'M BALANCING.
LOOK AT ME!

I'M ON A SKATEBOARD!

(whispers) IT'S NOT MOVING.

IT WOULD HELP
IF YOU PUSHED IT.

YOUR FRIEND'S
GOOD WITH KIDS.

HOW ABOUT YOU, JACK?

(doorbell rings)

I TOLD SARAH
I WAS OKAY WITH KIDS.

I-I-I WAS ON AUTOPILOT.

I WOULD'VE SAID I WAS
INTO WICCA OR PILATES

IF THAT'S WHAT SHE LIKED.

HEY!

LOOK AT THAT. YOU SHOWED.

YOU KEEP COMING UP
WITH NEW WAYS TO LOOK GREAT.

IT IS UNCANNY.

THERE'S THE SMOOTH TALK
THAT MADE JACK KOZAKOWSKI

NUMBER THREE IN THE MORNING.
NUMBER TWO IN THE DEMOS,
BABY.

(smarmy voice)
AND NUMBER ONE IN OUR HEARTS.

(dogs howl and bark in distance)

THANKS FOR BEING FREE
ON SUCH SHORT NOTICE.

MY USUAL SITTER WAS BUSY,
BUT YOUR REFERENCES CHECKED OUT.

SOUNDS LIKE A NICE GUY,
THIS FELIX.

HIS CHILDREN--
SUCH LITTLE PRINCES.

(boy) I'M 13.
I DON'T NEED A SITTER.
MINE AREN'T.

IT'S A WASTE OF MONEY!
OKAY, GROUND RULES.

BEN GOES TO BED AT 9:00,
ADAM AT 10:00.

THEY CAN WATCH TV,
BUT BEN IS SCARED OF ANY SHOW

INVOLVING GHOSTS OR FOR SOME
REASON, SALESMEN. IT'S WEIRD.

IF YOU HAVE ANY PROBLEMS,
MY NEIGHBOR, MRS. TURNER,

IS RIGHT NEXT DOOR,
AND MY CELL

AND ALL OTHER EMERGENCY NUMBERS
ARE ON THE FRIDGE. GOT IT?

BEN, 9:00, ADAM, 10:00,
NO SALESMEN,

MRS. TURNER NEXT DOOR,
EMERGENCY NUMBER, FRIDGE.

ALL RIGHT. GO WITH GOD.

OKAY. HAVE FUN.

OKAY.

REMIND ME AGAIN--WHICH ONE OF
YOU IS ADAM AND WHICH ONE'S BEN?

KID "A," KID "B."
GREAT. KID "A,"
GET YOUR LADIES ON THE LINE.

TELL THEM TO RALLY OVER
TO THE PARTY PIT.

WE GOT A BOTTLE FOR SPINNING.
WE KNOW HOW TO USE IT.

KID "B," YOU CAN WATCH.
OKAY, THAT WAS A JOKE.

I'LL BE IN MY ROOM.

WHAT ELSE YOU GOT?

3 MONTHS ON THE OPEN ROAD
IN A 1982 EUROVAN WITH NO A.C.?

AND NO WORRIES.

IT WAS THE BEST THREE MONTHS
OF MY LIFE.

AND HOW MANY DIFFERENT
MUSIC FESTIVALS

DID THE 20-YEAR-OLD YOU HIT?

17. 18, ACTUALLY,
IF YOU WANT TO INCLUDE

AN IMPROMPTU UNCLE TUPELO SHOW

THAT HAPPENED ON THE ROOF
OF A CHURCH IN EAST ST. LOUIS.

UM, OF COURSE,
I DON'T REMEMBER THAT NIGHT,

UM, BUT I'M TOLD
IT WAS AWESOME.

I'M SO JEALOUS.

YOU KNOW, GETTING KNOCKED UP
AT 19 PUT A SERIOUS CRIMP

IN MY PARTYING EITHER
WITH OR LIKE ROCK STARS.

NEVER TOO OLD
FOR AN ADVENTURE.

WHAT'S THE WEATHER LIKE
IN NEVERLAND, JACK?

YOU KNOW, I ALWAYS THOUGHT
IT WAS A WEE BIT SLEAZY

WHEN I HEARD MARRIED MEN SAY
THEY WERE HAPPY TO BE MARRIED,

LIKE,
364 DAYS OUT OF THE YEAR,

BUT THEY WISH THAT THEY COULD
HAVE THAT 365th NIGHT OFF.

BUT SOMETIMES?

THAT'S HOW I FEEL
ABOUT MOTHERHOOD.

MY BOYS ARE MY FAVORITE PEOPLE
ON THE PLANET,

BUT, YEAH, ONE NIGHT A YEAR
TO HAVE YOUR LIFE?

I'D TAKE THAT.

(applause)
(man) WHOO! ALL RIGHT!

(cheering)

TELL ME THAT'S
JUST SOME LONG-HAIRED FELLOW

THAT HAPPENS TO BEAR
A STRIKING RESEMBLANCE

TO THE LEAD SINGER
OF FUTURE CLOUDS AND RADAR.

I CAN'T TELL YOU THAT.

THANK YOU.

MY NAME'S ROBERT HARRISON,

AND I'D LIKE TO THANK AN OLD
FRIEND OF MINE, JACK KOZAKOWSKI,

FOR INVITING ME
TO BE HERE TONIGHT.

THIS ONE GOES OUT
TO SARAH PORTER,

WHO HAS EXCEPTIONAL TASTE.

(playing "Build Havana")

♪ SHE GETS SO BROKEN UP ♪

♪ SHE CAN'T MEND ♪

(making kissing noises)

OH, I MIGHT BE
A LITTLE FUZZY

ON SECOND GRADER
SOCIAL ETIQUETTE,

BUT I'D EASE UP
ON THE KISSY SOUNDS.

IT SEEMS A LITTLE FORWARD.
I WANT YOU TO HAVE MY BABIES.

DUDE, WAY TOO FORWARD.
(Adam) BEN!

I WAS ON WITH VANESSA SALVATY.
OKAY, GET OFF ME.
GET OFF ME.

FINE LINE BETWEEN ROUGHHOUSING
AND CAIN AND ABEL.

OW!
GAME OVER.

OH, GAME OVER. COME ON.
(grunts)

YOUR BROTHER...

(sighs)

I'M TELLING MOM.

THAT'S GONNA BE HARD,

SEEING HOW MOM'S
NEVER COMING HOME.

(door slams)

(Ben crying)
VERY CONSTRUCTIVE, ADAM.

♪ HOW THIS LITTLE APARTMENT
ALWAYS STAYS SO COLD ♪

♪ OUR LOVE'S IN CURRENCY ♪

♪ THAT I CAN'T HOLD ♪

♪ WE COULD BUILD ♪

♪ WE COULD BUILD ♪

♪ HAVANA ♪

(cell phone rings)

(ring, beep)

YES, TREVOR?

Claire, I need your help.
It's an emergency.

YOUR PROBLEM, I'M QUITE SURE,
CAN WAIT UNTIL OUR NEXT SESSION.

Uh, no, it can't.
I'm babysitting,

and the 7-year-old locked
himself in the bathroom.

GIVE ME 30 MINUTES.

I KNOW IT'S SCARY,
BUT PART OF LIFE IS

KNOWING THAT WHEN SOMEONE
GOES OUT, THEY COME BACK.
I TRIED
THE "THEY COME BACK" ROUTE.

I TRIED THE "DON'T GIVE YOUR
BROTHER THE SATISFACTION" ROUTE.

I TRIED THE "YOU'RE GONNA
GET YOUR BABYSITTER

IN TROUBLE WITH YOUR MOM"
ROUTE.
SHH!

JUST BECAUSE YOUR MOM WENT OUT
TO DINNER OR A MOVIE

DOESN'T MEAN SHE'S GONE GONE.

BEN, WOULD YOU LIKE
TO UNLOCK THE DOOR

AND COME OUT AND TALK TO ME?
(Ben) NO!

MAYBE YOU COULD UNLOCK THE DOOR
AND LET ME IN?

(door unlocks, door opens)

YOU DIDN'T EVEN HAVE
TO SHOW HIM YOUR DEGREES.

I REALLY WANT
TO SEE YOU AGAIN.

JACK, THIS WAS A PRETTY GREAT--
AN AMAZING NIGHT, ACTUALLY,

BUT I CAN'T DO THIS
ON A REGULAR BASIS.

THAT'S OKAY.
I HAVE A LIMITED ROSTER

OF INDIE ROCK LEGENDS
THAT I CAN PULL FAVORS FROM.

(chuckles) I'M A MOM.

I DON'T GO OUT, EXCEPT
TO PICK UP MY KIDS FROM KARATE

OR GUITAR LESSONS.

WE EAT MEALS IN, I HELP THEM
WITH THEIR HOMEWORK.

THAT'S NOT A LIFE
I WISH ON ANY SINGLE MAN,

LET ALONE ONE WHO SAYS THE BEST
THREE MONTHS OF HIS LIFE

WAS AN 18-FESTIVAL ROAD TRIP.

THE BEST THREE MONTHS.

BUT THAT ROAD TRIP WAS
FOUR MONTHS LONG.

WHAT I REALLY WANT

IS JUST TO SEE YOU
AS MUCH AS I--

AS MUCH AS I POSSIBLY CAN.

MM.

WELL, BRACE YOURSELF.

WHAT WE FIND INSIDE
MIGHT NOT BE PRETTY.

(Sarah)
HEY, GUYS. HEY, TREVOR.

HI, STRANGER.
HOW WAS YOUR NIGHT?

YOU CAME HOME!

YOU CAME HOME. ADAM SAID
YOU WERE NEVER COMING HOME.
(Sarah) ADAM.

GOD, YOU'RE SUCH A BABY.
THIN ICE, ADAM MILES PORTER.

OF COURSE YOU TAKE HIS SIDE.
(drops controller)

(door slams)

MY BABYSITTER CALLED IN
A PSYCHIATRIST?

TREVOR DIDN'T WANT
TO RUIN YOUR DATE.

BEN LOCKED HIMSELF
IN THE BATHROOM,

AND IT SEEMS HE--
HE WET HIMSELF.

YES.
OH. I THOUGHT
WE WERE PAST THIS.

THE SCHOOL PSYCHIATRIST--

HE SAYS IT'S LINKED
TO THEIR DAD'S ABSENCE.
MM-HMM.

HE'D VISIT THE BOYS
FOR YEARS AFTER WE LEFT,

BUT WHEN HE STARTED A NEW FAMILY
A YEAR AGO, THE VISITS STOPPED.

FEARS OF ABANDONMENT
CAN BE VERY REAL

IN THE AFTERMATH
OF A DIVORCE.

YEAH. I'M LIVING
WITH A DOUBLE DOSE OF IT.

ADAM BURIES IT
IN HIS COOL FACADE,

AND BEN WEARS IT
ON HIS SLEEVE.

SO? HOW WAS IT?
HOW WAS WHAT?

THE MOVIE
"HERBIE GOES BANANAS."

THE DATE. HOW WAS THE DATE?

THE DATE WAS AMAZING,
BUT...

I DON'T KNOW.
I THINK IT JUST SUNK IN,

YOU KNOW, WHAT THE--
WHAT THE KIDS THING MEANS.

I'M JUST--
I'M--I'M NOT SURE I CAN RELATE.

I GOT SOMETHING TO SHOW YOU.

THIS IS THE ROOM
I GREW UP IN.

A ROCK 'N' ROLL SHRINE.
IF YOU CAN'T RELATE
TO THESE BOYS,

YOU'RE NOT TRYING HARD ENOUGH.

JACK KOZAKOWSKI.

IN THE FLESH.

I LISTEN TO YOUR SHOW.

OH, HEY,
I-I-I APPRECIATE THAT. UM...

KID "A."

IT USED TO BE REALLY GOOD.

BUT NOW... IT SUCKS.

♪♪

THANKS FOR THE FEEDBACK.

IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT
YOU CAN'T PLAY WHAT YOU WANT.

WHY DO YOU EVEN
STILL WANT TO WORK THERE?

WELL, LET'S SEE, UH,
IT KEEPS ME OFF THE STREETS,

UH, YOU KNOW, PAYS THE RENT,

FEEDS INTO MY, UH,
GENERAL MASOCHISM.

YEAH, THE MONEY. I-I GET IT.

(laughs)
WELL, HOW QUICKLY ONE MOVES

FROM, UH, CULT ICON
TO SELLOUT.

♪♪

(knock on door)

WE DID IT.

200 SINGLES HAVE FILLED OUT
OUR ONLINE QUESTIONNAIRE--

AN EQUAL MIX
OF YOUR SINGLES' GROUP,

KELSEY STANZLER'S
LOYAL READERS

AND FRIENDS OF THE DATEWELL
CORPORATE STAFF.

SO IT'S GO TIME, HUH?
LOOKS LIKE IT.

ARE YOU REALLY
INTO TAMARA DE LEMPICKA,

OR IS THIS, LIKE, A CHRISTMAS
GIFT FROM A PATIENT?

I'M A BIG FAN, PRETTY MUCH
OF ALL THINGS ART DECO.

ME, TOO.

(chuckles)
I'M ACTUALLY A MEMBER

OF THE ART DECO SOCIETY
OF NEW YORK.

NOT THAT I GO
TO THE MEETINGS OR ANYTHING.

I JUST LIKE--
GETTING THE NEWSLETTER?

YEAH.

SO YOU KNOW WHEN THEY'RE DOING
THE GUIDED TOURS AND ALL THAT.

OKAY, THANK YOU FOR MAKING ME
FEEL LIKE LESS OF A DORK.

WELL, WE ARE TOTAL DORKS.

SO I GUESS WE SHOULD GET
THIS THING GOING, HUH? YEAH.

YEAH, CAN'T WAIT TO SEE
WHO IT SPITS OUT FOR ME.

YOU FILLED OUT
A QUESTIONNAIRE?

A CHEF HAS TO TASTE
HIS OWN FOOD, RIGHT?

UM,
MAYBE YOU SHOULD TRY IT.

OH, I'M NOT SURE
THAT WOULD BE APPROPRIATE.

UH, USE A PSEUDONYM.
NO ONE WILL KNOW.

UH, SEE WHAT IT TURNS UP.

WE SURE HAVE A LOT
IN COMMON.

GOT A CALL AT WORK TODAY.

WAIT. GIVE ME TEN SECONDS
OF AFFIRMATION

SO I KNOW THAT MY LIFE
IS NOT A LIE.

DID YOU LIKE DINNER?
I LOVED THE MEAL--

SO MUCH SO, IN FACT,
THAT NOW I WANT TO CELEBRATE.

REMEMBER WHEN YOU SAID
THAT YOU WANTED TO BE ME

ONE NIGHT OF THE YEAR?
(clenched teeth) NOT IN FRONT
OF THE PROGENY.

ELVIS COSTELLO IS TAPING
A LIVE PERFORMANCE

AT THE BOWERY IN 90 MINUTES,

AND WE--YOU AND I--ARE 2
OF THE 30 PEOPLE ON THE LIST.

TREVOR'S STANDING BY.

WHAT DO YOU SAY?

YOU GO.

HERE AT THE PORTER HOUSE,

WE START OUR SCIENCE FAIR
PROJECT TONIGHT.

(The Rite Flyers'
"Suffer Fools Gladly" playing)

♪ SHE DON'T SUFFER ♪

♪ SHE DON'T, DON'T SUFFER ♪

♪ SHE DON'T SUFFER FOOLS,
SUFFER FOOLS ♪

♪ SUFFER FOOLS GLADLY ♪

♪ SUFFER FOOLS GLADLY ♪

♪♪

♪ SHE DON'T SUFFER,
SHE DON'T, DON'T SUFFER ♪

♪ SHE DON'T SUFFER FOOLS,
SUFFER FOOLS ♪

♪ SUFFER FOOLS GLADLY ♪

♪ SUFFER FOOLS GLADLY ♪

SO YOUR--YOUR NEW SINGLE
IS CALLED...

"R.O.F.L"?

YEAH. I WANTED TO DO
AN ALBUM THAT REFLECTS ME,

NOT THAT THE LAST ONE DIDN'T--
IT WAS ME.

IT WAS A... DIFFERENT ME,
YOU KNOW?

UM, I THINK
WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY IS,

THIS ALBUM REALLY REFLECTS
THE NEW ME, YOU KNOW?

LIKE, THE "NOW" ME, EVEN THOUGH
I RECORDED IT SIX MONTHS AGO.

♪ SHE DON'T SUFFER ♪

♪ SHE DON'T, DON'T SUFFER ♪

♪ SHE DON'T SUFFER FOOLS,
SUFFER FOOLS ♪

♪ SUFFER FOOLS GLADLY ♪

♪ SUFFER FOOLS GLADLY ♪

♪ SHE DON'T, SHE DON'T SUFFER ♪
(mouths words)

♪ SHE DON'T, DON'T SUFFER ♪

♪ SHE DON'T SUFFER,
SHE DON'T, DON'T SUFFER ♪

♪ SHE DON'T SUFFER,
SHE DON'T, DON'T SUFFER ♪

(mouths words)

♪♪

(speaks inaudibly)

CLIFFORD AND I USED
TO WORK TOGETHER

WAY BACK AT A STATION
IN FLAGSTAFF

THAT NO LONGER EXISTS.

NOW HE'S RUNNING A STATION
IN SEATTLE,

SAYS THERE'S A JOB THERE
FOR ME.
IN SEATTLE?

I MEAN, YOU KNOW, WHAT I AM
DOING HERE, TREVOR, IN NEW YORK

IS KILLING ME.

OUT IN SEATTLE,
I GET TO PLAY WHAT I WANT.

IT'S A DRIVE-TIME SLOT.
IT'S THE PERFECT JOB.

EXCEPT IT'S IN SEATTLE,
WHICH IS WHY YOU PASSED.

I SAID I'D TAKE A FEW HOURS
TO THINK ABOUT IT.

LOOK, MAYBE I CAN TAKE
THE JOB, YOU KNOW,

UH, KEEP THINGS GOING
WITH SARAH,

AND THEN WHEN WE'RE READY,
I'D ASK HER AND THE KIDS

TO MOVE OUT THERE WITH ME.
SERIOUSLY,
IS THIS YOUR FIRST DAY?

SARAH'S LIFE,
HER BOYS' LIVES--

THEY'RE HERE IN NEW YORK.

SHE'S NOT GONNA WANT TO UPROOT
AND MOVE TO WEST RAINS-ALL-YEAR

WHERE THEY DON'T KNOW ANYBODY.

SHE WANTS SOMEBODY TO DIG
INTO THE GROUND

RIGHT NEXT TO HER
AND SETTLE IN.

THAT'S HOW
YOU MAKE THIS WORK.

(doorbell rings)

HEY.

HEY.

HEY, GUYS.

HEY.
HEY.

YOU'RE RUNNING
A BIT LATE TODAY, HUH?

I DIDN'T REALIZE
I WAS ON A SCHEDULE.
YOU'RE NOT. DID YOU EAT?

SORRY. I--NO, I HAVEN'T.

WHY DON'T YOU
TAKE A LOAD OFF, RELAX?

♪♪

(turns up volume)

(man) ♪ ...OF THE HAND
OF YOUR HEART AND SOUL ♪

♪ AND I CAN SAY
BEFORE WE GET OLD ♪

HEY, JACK?

YES, KID "A"?

WE HAVE CAREER DAY
AT SCHOOL TOMORROW.

YOU MIND SHOWING UP,

OUT-COOLING
ALL THE LAWYER DADS?

♪ WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL WORLD ♪

(sighs)

DON'T GET ALL WEIRD
ABOUT IT.

WE WON'T START THROWING
A FOOTBALL AROUND.

NO SEX TALKS...
UNLESS YOU NEED ONE.

(chuckles)

NOW JUST SO I'M CLEAR,

I'M NOT GONNA BE RUBBING
YOUR HEAD AND SAYING,

"ATTABOY, CHAMP."

YEAH,
YOU GET THE PICTURE.

ALL RIGHT, I'M IN.

PERFECT.

GREAT. BOBBY RONSON
AND SOME OF THOSE GUYS

DON'T BELIEVE
I KNOW YOU.

HMM.

♪ WELL, I'M STILL TIRED ♪

OH, HEY, THAT'S GREAT.

AHEM.

MMM.

EVERYTHING OKAY?

YEAH.

YEAH, EVERYTHING'S FINE.

(cell phone rings)
MM.

♪ YEAH, I CAN SAY IT'S
A WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL... ♪

(clicks tongue and groans)

WHO CALLED?

IT'S NOBODY IMPORTANT.

♪ WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL,
WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL WORLD ♪

(knock on door)

JACK.

I WAS UP ALL NIGHT, WORRIED
ABOUT WHAT YOU WERE GONNA DO.

I TRIED CALLING YOU.
YOU DID?

ENOUGH TIMES THAT I MADE MYSELF
FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE.

I ATE AN ENTIRE POUND CAKE.
I'M STAYING, I'M STAYING.

I GOT THREE PRETTY GOOD REASONS
TO STAY IN NEW YORK.
EXCELLENT CHOICE.

HEY, YOU GOT
THE AFTERNOON FREE?

YOU WANNA ROADIE FOR LEGENDARY
DEEJAY JACK KOZAKOWSKI?

I'M SPEAKING OVER
AT KID A's CLASS IN QUEENS.

I COULD USE SOME HELP
HAULING OVER SOME RECORDS.

I'M ALMOST READY.
WHAT TIME ARE YOU
SUPPOSED TO BE THERE?

1:30.
1:30. 1:30? JACK, THAT'S AN HOUR
FROM NOW, IN QUEENS.

SOUNDING VERY WIFE-LIKE THERE,
TREVOR.

VERY UN-ROCK 'N' ROLL.

OKAY, I HAVE 20 MINUTES
IN FRONT OF THIS CLASS.

I CAN GIVE 'EM AN EDUCATION.

I COULD SET THESE KIDS
ON THE RIGHT PATH.

I CAN, YOU KNOW, SPIN SOME
STUFF THAT THEY DON'T KNOW

BUT STUFF THAT
THEY'D MOSTLY LIKE.
I THINK THEY'D MOSTLY LIKE
IF YOU WERE ON TIME.

OH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH,
IN A MINUTE.

OKAY, WE'RE GONNA START OFF

WITH GRANDMASTER FLASH'S
"WHITE LINES."

WE'LL DO, UH, YOU KNOW,
A PUBLIC SERVICE,

ANTI-DRUG KIND OF THING.
THE TEACHER'S GONNA LOVE THAT.

OKAY, GREAT, AND OFF
TO QUEENS WE MERRILY GO.
AND THEN SABBATH'S "WAR PIGS"

AS A SHOUT-OUT TO
THE SEVENTH GRADE METALHEADS,

FOR THEY, TOO,
ARE OUR FUTURE.

AND THEN MAYBE...

RASPBERRIES.

YEAH, DELVE INTO THE JOYS
OF POWER POP.

(indistinct conversations)

IT'S 1:25.
I SHOULD'VE TAKEN MY CAR.

NO. WELL, MAYBE WE SHOULD'VE
SPENT LESS TIME

ON THE "JOYS OF POWER POP"

AND MORE TIME ON THE A-B-C's
OF NOT LETTING KIDS DOWN.

(beeps)
(man) THE TRAIN SHOULD BE
MOVING SHORTLY.

THE MTA APOLOGIZES
FOR THE DELAY.

IT'S--NO SERVICE.

NO SERVICE.

YEAH, I THINK IT'S SAFE
TO SAY WE MISSED IT.

YOU'RE GONNA HAVE
TO MAKE THIS UP TO KID "A"

IN A PRETTY BIG WAY.
I KNOW.

I SUSPECT HIS MOTHER'S GONNA
BE AN EVEN TOUGHER SELL.

HEY, WHY DON'T YOU
TRY HER AGAIN?

I TRIED HER, LIKE,
TEN TIMES, OKAY?

SHE'S MADE THE DECISION
NOT TO ANSWER.

TRY HER AGAIN.

(sighs)

(beep, speed dialing)

(cell phone rings)

(ring)

(ring)

(shuts cell phone)

I HAVE BEEN STANDING OUT HERE
FOR A WHILE.

UH, HAND RAISED TO KNOCK,
UNABLE TO KNOCK...

HMM.

OH, YEAH, I SH--

I SHOULD PROBABLY
LET YOU GUYS MAKE UP.

I AM REALLY, REALLY,
REALLY SORRY.

I DON'T CARE.

YOU TALK FOR A LIVING.
YOU'RE GOOD AT IT.

MY KIDS--THEY DON'T NEED
ANY MORE TALK.

WE'VE HAD OUR QUOTA FILLED
WITH MEN WHO DISAPPOINT.

WE NEED A MAN WHO SHOWS UP.

YOU'D BE AMAZED HOW HARD IT IS
TO FIND THAT.

YEAH, BUT, SARAH, I'M NOT ONE
OF THOSE MEN WHO LET YOU DOWN.

I--MAYBE I WAS.

I ADMIT, I WAS NOT LOOKING
TO SETTLE DOWN.

I-I DIDN'T WANT TO.

I JUST HAD THIS IDEA IN MY MIND
THAT YOU WERE THE SAME AS ME.

YOU WERE A FELLOW
ROCK 'N' ROLL NOMAD.
IS THIS MEANT
TO COMFORT ME?

NOW I JUST SIT IN MY BOOTH,

WANTING TO GET HOME
FOR PIZZA NIGHT,

WONDERING HOW BEN DID
ON A SPELLING TEST, UH...

TRYING TO GET A SMILE
OUT OF ADAM.

WHEN I THINK OF HOME, I-I THINK
OF WHERE YOU AND THE BOYS ARE.

I WAS NEVER INTERESTED
IN ANY OF THIS,

BUT THEN YOU HAD TO GO MAKE ME
FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU.

WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?

DON'T MAKE ME
REPEAT THE CHORUS.

THE BOYS ARE AT KARATE.

AND THEN THEIR FRIEND MILO'S MOM
IS PICKING THEM UP

FOR A SLEEPOVER.

WELL, IT SEEMS LIKE
THE PERFECT TIME

TO PUT ON "ASTRAL WEEKS."

(chuckles)

(telephone rings)

(Sarah)
YOU'VE REACHED THE PORTERS'.

LEAVE A MESSAGE.
(beep)

(man) Jack, it's Cliffy.
Whose place am I calling?

Is it true?
Are you domesticated?

That's too bad, because I've
got the best job in America

waiting for you in Seattle.

You've asked for more time
to consider the offer.

I've given you more time.
Quit keeping me hanging, buddy.

You and I know there's no way
you'll ever be happy

playing that Top 40 crap.
(beep)

♪♪

HEY.
HEY.

SO... THAT GUY
FROM THE RADIO STATION?

JACK?

YEAH, IF HE PASSES OUT
IN HIS OWN SICK,

YOU'RE CLEANING UP.

JACK, WHAT HAPPENED?

SWEET JANE.

SHE BROKE UP WITH ME.

SHE SAID WE ONLY HAD
TWO SCENARIOS.

EITHER I'D EVENTUALLY
LEAVE HER,

OR I WOULD STICK AROUND
AND RESENT HER FOR IT.

SHE SAID WE WOULD ONLY END
TRAGICALLY.

I TOLD HER SHE WAS WRONG.
SHE WOULDN'T LISTEN.

SHE WOULDN'T LISTEN... TODAY.

TOMORROW. TOMORROW'S A GREAT DAY
FOR LISTENING.

THERE'S NOTHING KEEPING ME
IN NEW YORK NOW.

I SHOULD'VE TAKEN
CLIFFORD'S OFFER.

MAYBE THEY HAVEN'T FILLED IT.
MAYBE I CAN STILL CALL.

DID YOUR MUSICAL HEROES QUIT
WHEN THE GOING GOT TOUGH?

DID THE CLASH? DID THE BEATLES?
DID THE DOORS?

WELL, IN THAT ORDER,
YES, YES...

AND I HAVE KILLED MEN
FOR FAR LESS

THAN INSINUATING
THAT I EVER LIKED THE DOORS.

IF YOU'RE READY TO QUIT
THAT EASILY,

MAYBE SARAH WAS RIGHT
TO CUT YOU LOOSE

BEFORE YOU BROKE HER HEART.

(click)
(dance music playing)

MUST YOU PUNISH US?
I WANNA HEAR JACK.

CHANGE THE STATION,
BEN.
NO.

(woman) FRANK, YOU'RE ON
IN RED HOOK.

(man) Hey, what happened
to Jack?

Why isn't he on anymore?
(woman) JACK KOZAKOWSKI HIT
THE ROAD A COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO.

NOW YOU'RE HANGING
WITH THE MOON QUEEN.

(turns off radio)
THERE YOU GO. HE'S PROBABLY
IN SEATTLE BY NOW.

I'M SORRY.

BEN, YOU GET TO CHOOSE
THE STATION IN THE CAR, OKAY?

ANYTHING YOU LIKE.

HI. MAY I HAVE
A LARGE COFFEE, PLEASE?

AND, UH, DO YOU HAVE
ANY CROISSANTS TODAY?

I THINK I TOOK
THE LAST ONE.

YOU REALIZE YOU'RE OBLIGATED
TO SHARE WITH ME NOW, RIGHT?

SO I DID
WHAT YOU SUGGESTED.

I CAN BE VERY SUGGESTIVE.

I FILLED OUT A QUESTIONNAIRE,
PICKED A PSEUDONYM.

I HAVE THE RESULTS RIGHT HERE
IN MY BAG. SHOULD WE--

(scoffs) TOO BUSY
FOR A SECOND DATE,

BUT NOT TOO BUSY
FOR A FREAKIN' PASTRY, EH?
(sighs)

"TRUE CONNECTION"?

"WHEN YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW.
LET'S WELCOME THE DAWN."

YOU SLEAZY, LYING CREEP.

"LET'S WELCOME THE DAWN"?

UM... I DON'T SUPPOSE
WE COULD FORGET

THE LAST 40 SECONDS
EVER HAPPENED, COULD WE?

NO. BUT WE CAN FORGET ABOUT
ALL THE TIME LEADING UP TO IT.

RIGHT. (chuckles nervously)
I UNDERSTAND.

UM, YOU STILL WANT TO SEE
THE DATEWELL RESULTS?

OR IF THEY MATCHED US,

WILL YOU LOSE ALL FAITH
IN COMPUTER DATING?

OH... NO.

"TAMARA DE LEMPICKA."

THAT'S YOUR MATCH?

TAMARA.

THAT'S A HOT GIRL'S NAME,
RIGHT?

I'VE KNOWN TWO TAMARAS.

IT CAN GO EITHER WAY.

TAMARA...

(woman) SARAH.

IS YOUR CELL PHONE OFF?

(groans) DEAD BATTERY. GREAT.
BEN'S SCHOOL CALLED.

THEY'VE BEEN TRYING
TO REACH YOU FOR AN HOUR.

HE'S LOCKED HIMSELF
IN THE BOYS' BATHROOM AGAIN.
(groans)

BEN, YOU OKAY?
YEAH.

UH, HE CALLED ME
ON MY CELL PHONE.

I CAME AS SOON AS I HEARD.
I BROUGHT YOU SOME CLOTHES,

UNLESS YOU WANNA STAY
IN WHAT YOU HAVE.

I KINDA FEEL LIKE
I'M IN A DRESS, SO...

THANKS FOR COMING.

THOUGHT YOU'D BE
IN SEATTLE BY NOW.

SEATTLE DIDN'T SOUND
LIKE A FIT.

THE FLANNEL SHIRTS, COFFEE,
OUTRIGGER CLUBS...

(chuckles) THANKS, BUT, NO.

THE FACT IS,

I THINK MAYBE NEW YORK CITY
STILL HAS A LOT TO OFFER.

YOU THINK SO?
I DO.

I'VE BEEN WORKING ON, UH,
FIGURING OUT WHAT WORK

WILL MAKE ME HAPPY.

UH, I FIGURED IF I CAN
MAKE MYSELF HAPPY,

THEN I COULD SPREAD
SOME JOY.

HOW'S THAT WORKING OUT
FOR YOU?

I THINK I'LL GET MY ANSWER
SOON ENOUGH.

I LIKE THEIR CHANCES.

THEIR COMMON INTERESTS
DIDN'T HURT.

LISTEN, I'M GONNA GO SEE
JACK AND SARAH AND THE KIDS

AFTER THIS
FOR THE GRAND OPENING.

ANY INTEREST IN JOINING ME?
ME? NOW?

CAN WE NOT PRETEND YOU HAVE
ANY OTHER PLANS?
I'LL GET MY PURSE.

GREAT. (sighs)

(The Pixies'
"Here Comes Your Man" playing)

♪ OUTSIDE,
THERE'S A BOXCAR WAITING ♪

♪ OUTSIDE THE FAMILY... ♪

SO YOU STILL WORRIED
ABOUT CARRYING CDs

ALONGSIDE THE VINYL?

NAH. YOU KNOW,
WITH MP3s ALL OVER,

(clicks teeth)
CDs ARE THE NEW VINYL.

JUST RETRO ENOUGH.

OH, LOOK AT ADAM.

HE LOVES THIS PLACE.

MM. YEAH, THE KID
KNOWS HIS STUFF.

YOU TAUGHT HIM WELL.

♪ THE BOXCAR WAITING ♪

♪ TAKE ME AWAY TO... ♪

LOOK AT THIS. ALL THE BANDS
I LISTENED TO IN COLLEGE--

PAVEMENT, LIZ PHAIR.

I LOVED
THIS LEMONHEADS RECORD.

DO YOU HAVE
A RECORD PLAYER?

NO, BUT MAYBE I'LL GET ONE.
MAYBE YOU'LL MEET A GUY
WHO LIKES RECORDS, TOO.

EXPLORE YOUR COMMONALITIES,

LIKE YOUR DATEWELL
QUESTIONNAIRE.

DATEWELL AND I
HAVE PARTED WAYS.

OH. WHY?

RECENT DEVELOPMENTS
SUGGEST TO ME

THAT A COMPUTER MAY BE UNABLE
TO IDENTIFY CERTAIN FACTORS

REQUIRED TO, UH, BRING
A RELATIONSHIP TO LIFE.

INTERESTING.

YES, THIS IS
WHERE YOU GLOAT, BRAG,

DO YOUR LITTLE GOALPOST DANCE.

NO DANCING,

FOR IT SEEMS WE HAVE MADE
AN IDEOLOGICAL DO-SI-DO.

WHAT, YOU THINK COMPUTERS
CAN PLAY A ROLE

IN BRINGING PEOPLE TOGETHER?
PROVIDED THEY WORK
HAND IN HAND

WITH A HUMAN UNDERSTANDING
OF RELATIONSHIPS.

LOOK, I MIGHT HAVE BEEN
A LITTLE HASTY

AND HARSH WITH YOU, CLAIRE,
AND I OWE YOU AN APOLOGY

FOR NOT BEING MORE OPEN
TO OTHER PERSPECTIVES.

WOW.

WELL, THANK YOU, TREVOR.

THAT REALLY MEANS A LOT.

YOU'RE WELCOME, TAMARA.

♪ HERE COMES YOUR MAN ♪