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1
00:00:08,601 --> 00:00:09,851
Oops, missed one.
2
00:00:12,316 --> 00:00:15,152
You know, the first time
I chopped a head off,
3
00:00:15,199 --> 00:00:17,167
I was eight years old.
4
00:00:17,201 --> 00:00:18,602
It was a rabbit.
5
00:00:18,636 --> 00:00:20,837
He'd been breaking all
the rabbit rules.
6
00:00:20,872 --> 00:00:23,907
Everyone knows rabbits
hop and eat carrots.
7
00:00:23,941 --> 00:00:26,109
But this rabbit walked
8
00:00:26,144 --> 00:00:28,111
And ate coconuts.
9
00:00:28,146 --> 00:00:29,780
So I chopped its head off.
10
00:00:33,573 --> 00:00:35,641
I knew my mom
wouldn't understand,
11
00:00:35,675 --> 00:00:38,277
so I hid his head in
my favorite lunch box
12
00:00:38,311 --> 00:00:40,479
and tossed it
into the water.
13
00:00:41,067 --> 00:00:44,538
That was my first time
being a hero.
14
00:00:44,578 --> 00:00:45,779
Good talk.
15
00:00:45,813 --> 00:00:46,980
Now bye.
16
00:00:57,786 --> 00:00:59,860
Hey, life vest on.
17
00:00:59,885 --> 00:01:01,694
You know the rules, kiddo!
18
00:01:02,146 --> 00:01:04,915
Son!?
Where do you think you're going?
19
00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:09,914
One day, at the
scene of the fire,
20
00:01:09,954 --> 00:01:12,594
the cop found
the perfect axe.
21
00:01:12,639 --> 00:01:16,442
That was the day
he became Axe Cop!
22
00:01:18,172 --> 00:01:20,891
So he had tryouts and
hired a partner.
23
00:01:24,226 --> 00:01:26,945
I will chop your heads off!
24
00:01:27,119 --> 00:01:30,283
Axe Cop - 01x06
The Rabbit Who Broke All the Rules
25
00:01:30,441 --> 00:01:33,391
Oooh chihuahua, Axe Cop,
26
00:01:33,421 --> 00:01:35,797
don't kill the messenger,
but I got some bad news.
27
00:01:35,820 --> 00:01:39,539
Our gun bill was through the
roof last month. Holy cow.
28
00:01:39,579 --> 00:01:42,500
If we wanna buy more bullets, we're
going to have to get second jobs.
29
00:01:50,708 --> 00:01:51,818
Hey, Flute Cop,
30
00:01:52,005 --> 00:01:54,888
what's the kind of dad that
gets paid to be a dad?
31
00:01:54,922 --> 00:01:56,638
I think you're talking
about a foster dad.
32
00:01:56,671 --> 00:01:58,491
Problem solved, Flute Cop.
33
00:01:58,546 --> 00:02:00,389
I will be your foster dad
34
00:02:00,436 --> 00:02:02,671
and I'll use the money
to buy bullets.
35
00:02:02,718 --> 00:02:04,667
Or not.
Axe Cop,
36
00:02:04,699 --> 00:02:07,738
as a dad I have to say this,
I just have to say it:
37
00:02:07,777 --> 00:02:10,839
raising a child is a
huge responsibility.
38
00:02:10,879 --> 00:02:11,748
I know.
39
00:02:11,787 --> 00:02:14,983
That's why I'm going to find
him a mom to take care of him.
40
00:02:15,021 --> 00:02:18,148
Oh, Axe Cop! Last year,
me and a couple buddies
41
00:02:18,186 --> 00:02:20,968
found out about this place out
in the deserts of Las Vegas
42
00:02:21,006 --> 00:02:24,155
where for a small fee, they'll
set you up with a girl.
43
00:02:24,187 --> 00:02:27,156
- How much does it cost?
- $15.
44
00:02:27,198 --> 00:02:30,134
You two stay here and
babysit my foster son.
45
00:02:30,168 --> 00:02:32,682
Grey Diamond and I are
going to Las Vegas.
46
00:02:32,708 --> 00:02:33,604
Whoo-hoo!
47
00:02:33,630 --> 00:02:36,880
They have a roller coaster
on top of a hotel.
48
00:02:36,920 --> 00:02:39,716
And the second-best brunch
is at lucky Lucy's saloon.
49
00:02:39,756 --> 00:02:41,681
It's great, but you gotta
get there early
50
00:02:41,720 --> 00:02:43,909
'cause they run out
of French toast fast.
51
00:02:43,931 --> 00:02:45,465
This is the place.
52
00:02:45,499 --> 00:02:47,100
Whoa!
53
00:02:51,130 --> 00:02:54,762
Hello, welcome to the perfect
match machine and wedding chapel.
54
00:02:54,801 --> 00:02:57,551
Before we get started, we're gonna
need you to fill out this form.
55
00:02:57,590 --> 00:02:59,631
I don't fill out forms, Todd.
56
00:02:59,668 --> 00:03:01,733
Gimme that!
I love paperwork.
57
00:03:01,764 --> 00:03:04,818
One time me and my buddy filled
out like 10 forms at once.
58
00:03:04,866 --> 00:03:07,678
- It was like, what?
- Now step into the machine.
59
00:03:07,709 --> 00:03:10,685
It will scan your brain and
find your perfect match.
60
00:03:16,051 --> 00:03:17,485
What the heck?
61
00:03:17,519 --> 00:03:19,613
In my 20 years of working here
62
00:03:19,651 --> 00:03:21,950
I've never seen
anything like this.
63
00:03:22,099 --> 00:03:24,380
You are the ultimate man.
64
00:03:24,411 --> 00:03:27,013
Tell me something
I don't know, Todd.
65
00:03:27,047 --> 00:03:30,982
There is literally not a
single woman on this planet
66
00:03:31,022 --> 00:03:34,420
- good enough for Axe Cop.
- Let's get outta here, Grey Diamond.
67
00:03:34,451 --> 00:03:36,752
Awesome! That gives us
some time to hit the strip
68
00:03:36,787 --> 00:03:38,988
and try our luck on
some games of chance.
69
00:03:39,022 --> 00:03:40,689
Wexter!
70
00:03:44,630 --> 00:03:47,770
I lost everything in the
casinos of Las Vegas.
71
00:03:47,814 --> 00:03:51,550
Foster kid, I couldn't find
you a mom in Las Vegas
72
00:03:51,584 --> 00:03:53,697
so that leaves me
with no choice.
73
00:03:53,728 --> 00:03:55,252
I can't be your dad.
74
00:03:55,769 --> 00:03:57,535
Axe Cop, you just can't
foster a child
75
00:03:57,567 --> 00:03:59,425
and then decide
you don't want him.
76
00:03:59,459 --> 00:04:01,460
You need to take
some responsibility.
77
00:04:01,492 --> 00:04:04,499
Hmmm, my tri-annual
learn out for kids
78
00:04:04,531 --> 00:04:07,124
- is coming up this weekend.
- Oh, that's perfect!
79
00:04:07,156 --> 00:04:10,535
That would really give you two some
father-foster son bonding time.
80
00:04:10,582 --> 00:04:12,780
And if I teach him how
to be more like me,
81
00:04:12,806 --> 00:04:14,212
the ultimate man,
82
00:04:14,511 --> 00:04:17,394
he could be
the ultimate son!
83
00:04:20,652 --> 00:04:23,933
Now if you're here for
Sockarang's Sockattacks 101,
84
00:04:23,964 --> 00:04:25,791
follow him to cabin "B."
85
00:04:25,823 --> 00:04:28,502
Who's ready to go nuts?!
86
00:04:28,534 --> 00:04:30,257
Sockattack! Sockattack!
87
00:04:30,288 --> 00:04:33,406
If you're here for Grey Diamond's
"best friend" seminar,
88
00:04:33,438 --> 00:04:34,975
raise your hand.
89
00:04:35,022 --> 00:04:37,840
Now the thing to consider
when picking a best friend
90
00:04:37,872 --> 00:04:41,104
is who lives closest
to your house.
91
00:04:41,150 --> 00:04:44,080
Dinosaurs, follow wexter.
92
00:04:44,112 --> 00:04:46,409
And if you're here
for the axe learn out,
93
00:04:46,448 --> 00:04:49,083
pick up your wooden
axes and follow me.
94
00:04:49,210 --> 00:04:52,112
I said
dinosaurs follow wexter!
95
00:04:53,706 --> 00:04:54,372
Right.
96
00:04:54,833 --> 00:04:55,684
Right.
97
00:04:56,053 --> 00:04:57,086
Right.
98
00:04:58,130 --> 00:05:00,198
- Wrong!
- Whoa whoa whoa!
99
00:05:00,231 --> 00:05:02,462
Axe Cop, can I have a
quick word with you?
100
00:05:02,509 --> 00:05:04,010
You got to lighten up
on that kid.
101
00:05:04,064 --> 00:05:05,937
How about instead
of yelling at him,
102
00:05:05,971 --> 00:05:07,744
you show him how to improve.
103
00:05:07,783 --> 00:05:09,829
But he's terrible at everything.
104
00:05:09,863 --> 00:05:12,673
There's no way he could
be my foster son.
105
00:05:12,712 --> 00:05:14,979
The kid just needs
some encouragement.
106
00:05:15,013 --> 00:05:17,281
I know you can do it,
Axe Cop.
107
00:05:22,290 --> 00:05:24,384
Psst, kid, you asleep?
108
00:05:25,624 --> 00:05:28,904
I wanna tell you something about
me that you probably don't know.
109
00:05:28,930 --> 00:05:30,887
I have three world records.
110
00:05:30,918 --> 00:05:33,025
The first is for the
most axe blades.
111
00:05:33,126 --> 00:05:35,209
I just pushed a button on my axe
112
00:05:35,236 --> 00:05:37,604
and 1,000 blades came out.
113
00:05:39,296 --> 00:05:42,553
The second is for being the
world's fastest chopper.
114
00:05:42,610 --> 00:05:44,349
I pushed a button on my chest
115
00:05:44,406 --> 00:05:46,073
and a robotic arm came out
116
00:05:46,155 --> 00:05:49,310
and fed me an axe
star energy drink.
117
00:05:49,373 --> 00:05:51,905
I ran past 1,000 bad guys
118
00:05:51,949 --> 00:05:54,383
super fast.
119
00:05:54,512 --> 00:05:57,462
But it was so fast,
my axe was invisible.
120
00:05:57,634 --> 00:05:58,993
Wait, what?
121
00:05:59,025 --> 00:06:01,694
My third world record
was the hardest to get.
122
00:06:02,156 --> 00:06:03,657
I went to jump school,
123
00:06:03,705 --> 00:06:05,706
Which was taught
by jump man.
124
00:06:06,282 --> 00:06:08,750
He could jump just a
little bit into space.
125
00:06:08,790 --> 00:06:09,987
Being the best jumper
126
00:06:10,018 --> 00:06:12,683
is the only thing that gives me
127
00:06:12,709 --> 00:06:15,651
Jo-oooy!
128
00:06:15,869 --> 00:06:17,404
But I made
my parents let me
129
00:06:17,427 --> 00:06:19,779
keep going to jump
school every year.
130
00:06:19,823 --> 00:06:23,576
I was going to go until
I could beat jump man.
131
00:06:24,268 --> 00:06:26,018
And one day, I did it.
132
00:06:26,058 --> 00:06:29,127
I jumped all the way
into outer space.
133
00:06:29,160 --> 00:06:29,839
No!
134
00:06:29,886 --> 00:06:32,480
That's how I got the world
record for highest jumper.
135
00:06:32,519 --> 00:06:35,362
No.
136
00:06:35,418 --> 00:06:37,409
The point is
I have three world records
137
00:06:37,433 --> 00:06:39,437
when most everyone
has none.
138
00:06:39,468 --> 00:06:40,205
But...
139
00:06:40,362 --> 00:06:42,958
I had to work hard to get them.
140
00:06:43,021 --> 00:06:45,283
At least I had to work
hard to get one of them.
141
00:06:45,453 --> 00:06:46,954
Good night, foster son.
142
00:06:54,082 --> 00:06:57,426
Oh, not bad,
143
00:06:57,457 --> 00:07:00,121
but you are still kicking
a little too high.
144
00:07:00,185 --> 00:07:01,986
Try it again,
but lower.
145
00:07:03,290 --> 00:07:05,942
I think you're ready for
something more advanced.
146
00:07:05,974 --> 00:07:07,641
Axe Face Kick!
147
00:07:09,162 --> 00:07:11,797
Pouncing tiger kick!
148
00:07:11,832 --> 00:07:14,223
Spinning tornado kick!
149
00:07:16,725 --> 00:07:20,653
I saw a lot of losers turn
to winners this weekend.
150
00:07:20,685 --> 00:07:23,476
But there was only
one super winner
151
00:07:23,510 --> 00:07:27,403
- who learned all the kicks.
- Even the flaming falcon kick?
152
00:07:27,439 --> 00:07:29,931
- Mm-hmm.
- Even the upside down face kick?
153
00:07:29,962 --> 00:07:32,322
- Yep.
- Even the spinning tornado kick?
154
00:07:32,354 --> 00:07:35,427
- With a plum.
- Wow. Good job, little guy.
155
00:07:35,463 --> 00:07:38,432
Here's your very own real axe.
156
00:07:38,646 --> 00:07:41,982
I'm proud of you. You're
not just my foster son,
157
00:07:42,015 --> 00:07:44,678
you're my ultimate son.
Now follow me.
158
00:07:44,702 --> 00:07:47,069
It's time for you
to become a hero,
159
00:07:47,099 --> 00:07:49,076
like your ultimate dad.
160
00:07:50,975 --> 00:07:52,609
See that hole?
161
00:07:52,643 --> 00:07:55,346
It's filled with a
lot of good rabbits.
162
00:07:55,643 --> 00:07:58,481
But there's always one who
breaks all the rules.
163
00:07:58,516 --> 00:08:03,518
So, when he strolls out here,
casually eating a coconut,
164
00:08:03,557 --> 00:08:06,292
that's when I want you
to chop his head off.
165
00:08:08,228 --> 00:08:10,029
It's time.
Do it now.
166
00:08:13,140 --> 00:08:14,941
Now!
167
00:08:24,819 --> 00:08:27,687
Ultimate son,
what has gotten into you?
168
00:08:27,722 --> 00:08:30,709
I'm not your ultimate son.
169
00:08:30,756 --> 00:08:35,654
I'm your ultimate enemy,
the soul of your first kill.
170
00:08:35,694 --> 00:08:39,463
And now I'm back to kill you.
171
00:08:39,498 --> 00:08:42,633
You're the soul of the rabbit
that broke all the rules?
172
00:08:42,667 --> 00:08:45,703
I'll chop your head off again!
173
00:08:53,124 --> 00:08:54,791
You can't defeat me!
174
00:08:54,826 --> 00:08:57,494
You've taught me all
of your kicks, dummy.
175
00:08:57,810 --> 00:08:58,646
Wrong.
176
00:08:58,672 --> 00:09:00,789
There's one kick
I didn't teach you
177
00:09:00,836 --> 00:09:03,615
because it didn't
exist until now.
178
00:09:03,650 --> 00:09:06,685
Axe Cop soul kick!
179
00:09:12,825 --> 00:09:15,666
All I ever wanted to do
180
00:09:15,838 --> 00:09:17,994
was walk around
181
00:09:18,033 --> 00:09:20,314
and eat coconuts.
182
00:09:20,369 --> 00:09:22,801
Then you shouldn't have
been born a rabbit.
183
00:09:22,835 --> 00:09:25,147
Ahhh!
184
00:09:25,177 --> 00:09:26,911
Where am I?!
185
00:09:26,946 --> 00:09:30,315
Hmm. There goes all
that foster-dad money.
186
00:09:30,349 --> 00:09:32,917
Ah, I guess
I was wrong, buddy.
187
00:09:32,952 --> 00:09:35,420
I'm sorry I told you to take
that kid under your wing.
188
00:09:35,454 --> 00:09:38,990
But I still think spending time with
him taught you a very valuable lesson.
189
00:09:39,024 --> 00:09:41,025
Right? No?
190
00:09:41,060 --> 00:09:43,261
- Yeah, right?
- Yes, it did.
191
00:09:43,278 --> 00:09:45,591
I learned that if you're
going to kill something,
192
00:09:45,630 --> 00:09:48,600
you have to make sure
you kill its soul too.
193
00:09:48,634 --> 00:09:49,968
Yeah, that sounds
about right.
194
00:09:50,486 --> 00:09:52,270
You were my foster son,
195
00:09:52,830 --> 00:09:54,973
but I never gave you a name.
196
00:09:55,007 --> 00:09:57,008
Now I can.
197
00:09:57,042 --> 00:09:58,810
Last name "Rabbit,"
198
00:09:58,844 --> 00:10:00,578
First name...
199
00:10:00,613 --> 00:10:02,280
"Dead."
200
00:10:11,918 --> 00:10:13,961
Ah, hold on.
201
00:10:20,132 --> 00:10:21,898
It sounds wrong.
202
00:10:21,930 --> 00:10:23,898
It's like off tune, right?
What is that?
203
00:10:24,102 --> 00:10:27,805
Sync & corr by blue1506
-- for addic7ed.com --
15211
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