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1
00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:04,530
- CLEANING THE BATHROOM
IS THE MOST
2
00:00:04,533 --> 00:00:06,003
VALUABLE THING YOU DO.
- I QUIT.
3
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:07,470
I DESERVE THIS JACKET.
4
00:00:07,467 --> 00:00:09,297
IT REPRESENTS
MY TOTAL UNEMPLOYABILITY.
5
00:00:09,300 --> 00:00:11,370
- I'M JUST EXPECTING
A TEXT FROM BRETT.
6
00:00:11,367 --> 00:00:12,997
- MAYBE...BE MATURE
AND TEXT HIM?
7
00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:14,370
- UH...NO!
8
00:00:14,367 --> 00:00:15,427
- AT LEAST YOU COULD
CONTACT BRETT.
9
00:00:15,433 --> 00:00:16,933
I CAN'T EVEN FIND JANE.
10
00:00:19,400 --> 00:00:21,070
- WHO'S READY FOR ANOTHER?
- THINK I'M GOOD.
11
00:00:21,067 --> 00:00:22,667
- YEAH, YOU WOULDN'T
WANNA HAVE A SECOND BEER.
12
00:00:22,667 --> 00:00:24,727
YOU MIGHT CRASH INTO SOMEBODY
ON THE WALK HOME.
13
00:00:24,733 --> 00:00:26,333
- GIVE HER A BREAK.
WE GOTTA WAKE UP EARLY
14
00:00:26,333 --> 00:00:27,533
TO PREPARE
FOR OUR BIG BASH.
15
00:00:27,533 --> 00:00:28,733
- THIS IS
THE FIRST PARTY
16
00:00:28,733 --> 00:00:30,673
WE'VE EVER THROWN TOGETHER
AS A COUPLE.
17
00:00:30,667 --> 00:00:32,667
ALL OF OUR GRAD SCHOOL FRIENDS
ARE GONNA BE THERE, SO...
18
00:00:32,667 --> 00:00:34,727
- DOCTOR DORKS
AND LAW DWEEBS?
19
00:00:34,733 --> 00:00:37,003
THIS PARTY'S GONNA BE LIKE A
NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC SPECIAL
20
00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:39,000
ON THE MATING RITUALS
OF THE SOCIALLY CHALLENGED.
21
00:00:39,000 --> 00:00:40,000
- YOU'RE FUNNY.
22
00:00:40,000 --> 00:00:41,730
- IS IT OKAY
IF I BRING SOMEBODY?
23
00:00:41,733 --> 00:00:43,973
- WHO?
- BRETT?
24
00:00:43,967 --> 00:00:45,367
- RUH-ROH.
- WHAT?
25
00:00:45,367 --> 00:00:47,927
WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU EVEN
TALKED TO THAT HIPSTER TOOL?
26
00:00:47,933 --> 00:00:49,473
- NOT SINCE
THE RAVIOLI PARTY,
27
00:00:49,467 --> 00:00:52,727
BUT AFTER MY LITTLE
SOCIAL DISEASE SCARE,
28
00:00:52,733 --> 00:00:55,873
I REALIZED THAT
I KIND OF LIKE HIM.
29
00:00:55,867 --> 00:00:57,597
- WOW, A TINA
"I LIKE HIM"
30
00:00:57,600 --> 00:00:59,170
IS THE EQUIVALENT
TO MOST GIRLS'
31
00:00:59,167 --> 00:01:01,627
"I'LL SLIT MY WRISTS IN A WARM
BATH IF I CAN'T HAVE HIM."
32
00:01:01,633 --> 00:01:02,633
- [chuckling]
- ANYWAY.
33
00:01:02,633 --> 00:01:04,073
I THOUGHT
I WOULD REACH OUT,
34
00:01:04,067 --> 00:01:06,627
AND, YOU KNOW,
TELL HIM HOW I FEEL.
35
00:01:06,633 --> 00:01:08,803
- OH, IT SOUNDS LIKE
OUR LITTLE GIRL'S GROWING UP.
36
00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:10,400
- OR MAYBE A SIGN
OF THE END TIMES, YOU KNOW,
37
00:01:10,400 --> 00:01:12,070
WHEN THE CLOUDS START BLEEDING,
AND ANIMALS START TALKING.
38
00:01:12,067 --> 00:01:13,327
all: [chuckling]
- OKAY.
39
00:01:13,333 --> 00:01:14,933
WE'RE OUT.
SO WE'LL SEE YOU GUYS
40
00:01:14,933 --> 00:01:15,973
TOMORROW NIGHT?
- YEP.
41
00:01:15,967 --> 00:01:17,497
RETAINER AND
HEADGEAR OPTIONAL.
42
00:01:17,500 --> 00:01:18,800
- HA, HA.
- HEH.
43
00:01:18,800 --> 00:01:20,670
- ACTUALLY, I SHOULD
PROBABLY CRASH TOO.
44
00:01:20,667 --> 00:01:22,267
- [whining]
- I'M TAKING...
45
00:01:22,267 --> 00:01:24,627
THIS PLACEMENT TEST
AT A TEMP AGENCY TOMORROW.
46
00:01:24,633 --> 00:01:26,503
SERIOUSLY, IF I DON'T START
SCROUNGING TOGETHER
47
00:01:26,500 --> 00:01:28,700
SOME MONEY SOON, I MAY BE
KISSING BROOKLYN GOODBYE
48
00:01:28,700 --> 00:01:30,230
AND MY PARENTS HELLO.
- WELL...
49
00:01:30,233 --> 00:01:31,633
MAYBE YOU'LL MEET
A NICE GIRL IN ST. LOUIS.
50
00:01:31,633 --> 00:01:34,073
YOU KNOW, ONE WHO LOVES GOLF
AND MAKING BREAD.
51
00:01:34,067 --> 00:01:35,167
- SPORTY AND YEASTY?
52
00:01:35,167 --> 00:01:36,897
DOESN'T SOUND
TOO BAD TO ME RIGHT NOW.
53
00:01:36,900 --> 00:01:39,070
GOD, THE ONLY GIRL I'VE ACTUALLY
LIKED IN FOREVER WAS...
54
00:01:39,067 --> 00:01:40,297
both: JANE.
- YEAH.
55
00:01:40,300 --> 00:01:42,430
STEALS YOUR PANTS,
LEAVES A FAKE NUMBER, JANE.
56
00:01:42,433 --> 00:01:44,133
IF WE'RE GONNA HAVE
THIS CONVERSATION AGAIN,
57
00:01:44,133 --> 00:01:45,603
I'M GONNA NEED SOMETHING
HARDER THAN A BEER.
58
00:01:45,600 --> 00:01:46,870
- SORRY.
59
00:01:46,867 --> 00:01:48,427
WELL, HOPEFULLY BY THE TIME
YOU SEE ME TOMORROW,
60
00:01:48,433 --> 00:01:51,803
I WILL BE AN EMPLOYED,
TAX-PAYING MEMBER OF SOCIETY.
61
00:01:51,800 --> 00:01:54,230
- YOU WILL BE, JAY.
AND I'LL BE WITH BRETT.
62
00:01:54,233 --> 00:01:56,203
CAVEAT--UNLESS HE'S GONE
FULL WILLIAMSBURG
63
00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:58,900
AND TRAINED HIS MOUSTACHE
INTO A SALVADOR DALI.
64
00:01:58,900 --> 00:02:02,230
THEN I'M GONNA HAVE
TO REEVALUATE.
65
00:02:02,233 --> 00:02:04,473
I WONDER WHAT THOSE
LOOK LIKE IN THE MORNING.
66
00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:16,200
- [groaning]
67
00:02:18,333 --> 00:02:20,573
- ACCURACY BELOW LIMIT.
68
00:02:20,567 --> 00:02:23,827
- UGH, DAMN IT.
COME ON.
69
00:02:23,833 --> 00:02:25,233
- FAIL.
70
00:02:25,233 --> 00:02:28,473
- UGH.
71
00:02:30,233 --> 00:02:32,873
[cell phone vibrating]
72
00:02:32,867 --> 00:02:33,967
JB?
73
00:02:33,967 --> 00:02:35,397
HELLO?
74
00:02:35,400 --> 00:02:36,930
- HI, JASON,
I HAVE JB FOR YOU.
75
00:02:36,933 --> 00:02:38,103
- WOW, YOU GUYS
FINALLY GOT A PHONE
76
00:02:38,100 --> 00:02:39,070
THAT CAN
TRANSFER CALLS.
77
00:02:40,967 --> 00:02:43,567
- ALL RIGHT, JASON, YOU'RE ON
THE LINE WITH JB BROWN.
78
00:02:43,567 --> 00:02:45,667
- NOT JB BROWN.
THE "B" IS THE "BROWN."
79
00:02:45,667 --> 00:02:46,897
JESUS, ROGER.
80
00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:48,500
GIVE IT TO ME.
81
00:02:48,500 --> 00:02:52,200
HEY, GOOD NEWS, JAY.
MAMA DOG HAS A BONE FOR YOU.
82
00:02:52,200 --> 00:02:55,070
A WEEK-LONG ROLE
THAT YOU WOULD BE PERFECT FOR.
83
00:02:55,067 --> 00:02:56,867
- ROLE? LIKE,
AN ACTING JOB?
84
00:02:56,867 --> 00:03:01,467
- YES, PERFECT FOR A YOUNG,
AVERAGE WEIGHT, AVERAGE HEIGHT,
85
00:03:01,467 --> 00:03:03,527
VAGUELY UNIMPRESSIVE
GUY LIKE YOU.
86
00:03:03,533 --> 00:03:06,273
$500 FOR THE WEEK,
AND IT STARTS THIS AFTERNOON.
87
00:03:06,267 --> 00:03:08,727
ARE YOU INTERESTED?
- YEAH, TOTALLY.
88
00:03:08,733 --> 00:03:11,733
YOU HAD ME AT $500.
- FANTASTIC.
89
00:03:14,533 --> 00:03:17,603
- SO NOW I HAVE EVERYTHING
FOR MY CHAMPAGNE PUNCH.
90
00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:19,100
THE SECRET IS
THE ORANGE ZEST.
91
00:03:19,100 --> 00:03:20,670
- GREAT, AND I HAVE
EVERYTHING I NEED
92
00:03:20,667 --> 00:03:21,927
TO MAKE MY VODKA
GUMMY WORMS.
93
00:03:21,933 --> 00:03:23,373
THE SECRET IS
THEY GET YOU WASTED.
94
00:03:23,367 --> 00:03:25,127
- REALLY? VODKA WORMS?
95
00:03:25,133 --> 00:03:26,733
I MEAN, THIS IS OUR
FIRST PARTY AS A COUPLE.
96
00:03:26,733 --> 00:03:29,803
I WAS THINKING CHEESE PLATES,
MY PUNCH...
97
00:03:29,800 --> 00:03:31,470
- PEOPLE FALLING ASLEEP
IN FLUTES OF YOUR PUNCH.
98
00:03:31,467 --> 00:03:33,667
"CLASSY COCKTAIL"
IS CODE FOR BORING.
99
00:03:33,667 --> 00:03:34,927
OUR FIRST PARTY
SHOULD BE A BANGER.
100
00:03:34,933 --> 00:03:37,373
GOT A DJ APP ON MY IPAD,
WE'LL GET A KEG--
101
00:03:37,367 --> 00:03:40,667
- A KEG? ARE THE PLEDGES
GONNA TAP IT?
102
00:03:40,667 --> 00:03:42,367
WE'RE HAVING
A COCKTAIL PARTY.
103
00:03:42,367 --> 00:03:44,197
- SHOULDN'T OUR FIRST PARTY
AS A COUPLE
104
00:03:44,200 --> 00:03:46,370
HAVE STUFF
WE BOTH LIKE?
105
00:03:46,367 --> 00:03:47,467
- YOU'RE RIGHT.
106
00:03:47,467 --> 00:03:49,467
WE'LL DO THIS
MY WAY AND YOUR WAY.
107
00:03:49,467 --> 00:03:50,727
IT'LL BE THE BEST
OF BOTH OF US,
108
00:03:50,733 --> 00:03:54,803
INSTEAD OF JUST,
YOU KNOW, THE BEST.
109
00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:57,730
- WHY DO I ALWAYS GET TURKEY?
I'M SO BORED OF TURKEY.
110
00:03:57,733 --> 00:03:59,273
WHAT'D YOU GET?
- TURKEY.
111
00:03:59,267 --> 00:04:02,127
SO IT'S HAPPENING. TODAY.
I'M GONNA GO SURPRISE BRETT
112
00:04:02,133 --> 00:04:04,173
AT HIS WEEKLY SHUFFLEBOARD GAME.
- WOW.
113
00:04:04,167 --> 00:04:06,167
THAT'S SO
ROM-COM OF YOU.
114
00:04:06,167 --> 00:04:07,527
IS THERE A WAY YOU CAN
MAKE SURE IT'S RAINING
115
00:04:07,533 --> 00:04:09,073
WHEN YOU RUN
TO EACH OTHER AND KISS?
116
00:04:09,067 --> 00:04:12,067
- I KNOW, BUT IT'LL
BE EXCITING, YOU KNOW?
117
00:04:12,067 --> 00:04:14,197
HE'LL BE LIKE,
"WHOA, TINA."
118
00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:16,800
AND I'LL BE LIKE,
"HEY, BRETT, I MISSED YOU."
119
00:04:16,800 --> 00:04:18,370
ONLY NOT IN THOSE WORDS,
'CAUSE I HAVE DIGNITY.
120
00:04:18,367 --> 00:04:20,767
DO I LOOK OKAY?
- YEAH.
121
00:04:20,767 --> 00:04:23,067
- YOU LOOK GREAT.
CUTE, SWEET,
122
00:04:23,067 --> 00:04:24,827
BUT WILLING
TO DO THE WEIRD STUFF.
123
00:04:24,833 --> 00:04:26,273
THANKS.
124
00:04:26,267 --> 00:04:27,497
I'M A LITTLE NERVOUS.
125
00:04:27,500 --> 00:04:29,630
SO WHAT ABOUT YOU?
WHAT'S UP WITH YOUR GIG?
126
00:04:29,633 --> 00:04:31,833
- I DON'T KNOW MUCH.
JB CAST ME IN SOMETHING.
127
00:04:31,833 --> 00:04:32,803
IT STARTS
THIS AFTERNOON,
128
00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:34,630
AND I GET $500 FOR IT.
129
00:04:34,633 --> 00:04:36,703
- I'M TRYING TO FIGURE OUT
WHAT I'D CAST YOU AS.
130
00:04:36,700 --> 00:04:39,970
YOUNG LESBIAN COMING TO TERMS
WITH HER SEXUALITY,
131
00:04:39,967 --> 00:04:42,067
OR CORPSE #2
IN A ZOMBIE FILM.
132
00:04:42,067 --> 00:04:43,427
- HEY, I'M CORPSE
#1 MATERIAL,
133
00:04:43,433 --> 00:04:45,973
BUT I DON'T CARE WHAT IT IS.
I GOT A JOB.
134
00:04:45,967 --> 00:04:47,597
I'M SO HAPPY,
I COULD KISS JB
135
00:04:47,600 --> 00:04:48,900
RIGHT ON THE TIP
OF THE PENIS.
136
00:04:48,900 --> 00:04:52,600
- WELCOME TO DAY ONE OF FIVE,
MY FOODIE THESPIANS.
137
00:04:52,600 --> 00:04:54,470
NOW YOUR JOB IS
TO HIT THE STREETS,
138
00:04:54,467 --> 00:04:56,597
AND HAND OUT
RESTAURANT WEEK FLYERS.
139
00:04:56,600 --> 00:04:58,530
I WANT YOU BASTARDS
TO BE FRIENDLY.
140
00:04:58,533 --> 00:05:02,273
NO ONE WANTS A FLYER FROM A TACO
ACTING LIKE A TURD.
141
00:05:02,267 --> 00:05:03,497
YEAH, I'M TALKING
TO YOU, JOAN.
142
00:05:03,500 --> 00:05:05,830
YOU GOT AN ATTITUDE PROBLEM.
ADJUST IT.
143
00:05:05,833 --> 00:05:09,173
REMEMBER, YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE
FOR YOUR OWN COSTUMES.
144
00:05:09,167 --> 00:05:11,067
RUIN THEM,
AND I DOCK YOUR PAY.
145
00:05:11,067 --> 00:05:13,227
OKAY, BIG SMILES.
146
00:05:13,233 --> 00:05:15,433
AREN'T YOU GLAD YOU DECIDED
TO BLOW OFF LAW SCHOOL
147
00:05:15,433 --> 00:05:17,233
AND BECOME AN ACTOR?
148
00:05:17,233 --> 00:05:19,073
- SO, UH, HAVE YOU
DONE THIS BEFORE?
149
00:05:19,067 --> 00:05:20,597
- YEP. A LOT OF US
150
00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:23,070
WORK THE FLYERING CIRCUIT
PRETTY REGULARLY.
151
00:05:23,067 --> 00:05:25,227
I'VE BEEN A HAMMER,
A CELL PHONE...
152
00:05:25,233 --> 00:05:26,503
ONCE I WAS A TAMPON.
153
00:05:26,500 --> 00:05:28,070
- EW.
- IT WAS OKAY.
154
00:05:28,067 --> 00:05:31,627
IT RAINED.
I ABSORBED IT.
155
00:05:31,633 --> 00:05:33,703
HEY, WANNA BAKE
YOUR CAKE LATER?
156
00:05:33,700 --> 00:05:35,130
MAKES THE DAY FLY BY.
157
00:05:35,133 --> 00:05:37,233
- SO I GUESS ANY GUY
IN A FOOD COSTUME WILL DO,
158
00:05:37,233 --> 00:05:39,073
IS THAT IT?
- DON'T TALK TO ME, JIMMY.
159
00:05:39,067 --> 00:05:40,127
LET'S KEEP
THIS PROFESSIONAL.
160
00:05:47,400 --> 00:05:50,100
- COME ON, BRETT.
161
00:05:50,100 --> 00:05:51,130
- BOOM!
162
00:05:53,967 --> 00:05:55,567
- NICE SHOT.
163
00:06:11,533 --> 00:06:13,333
- OH, SWEET.
164
00:06:13,333 --> 00:06:15,133
MY OLD STROBE LIGHT.
165
00:06:15,133 --> 00:06:16,533
NOW IT'S A PARTY.
166
00:06:16,533 --> 00:06:18,403
- SWEET, A SEIZURE PARTY.
167
00:06:18,400 --> 00:06:20,970
CHECK OUT WHAT I GOT.
- YOU...
168
00:06:20,967 --> 00:06:22,097
BOUGHT A BAG
OF SEVERED HANDS?
169
00:06:22,100 --> 00:06:24,070
- THEY'RE VINTAGE
AND ARTISTIC.
170
00:06:24,067 --> 00:06:25,267
THE GUY AT THE FLEA
171
00:06:25,267 --> 00:06:27,297
SAYS IT'S REALLY TRENDY
TO USE THEM AS BOWLS.
172
00:06:27,300 --> 00:06:28,500
- I GUESS WE CAN USE
THESE TRENDY HANDS
173
00:06:28,500 --> 00:06:29,830
TO HOLD MY GUACAMOLE.
174
00:06:29,833 --> 00:06:32,573
- WE'RE SERVING GUACAMOLE?
I WAS THINKING MORE
175
00:06:32,567 --> 00:06:34,827
CHEESES AND CRUDITE.
- LISTEN...
176
00:06:34,833 --> 00:06:36,073
IF WE'RE PUTTING OUT
YOUR HANDS,
177
00:06:36,067 --> 00:06:37,467
THEY'RE GONNA
BE HOLDING MY GUAC.
178
00:06:38,567 --> 00:06:41,127
THAT SOUNDED DIRTIER
THAN I MEANT IT.
179
00:06:41,133 --> 00:06:42,773
- I'M GONNA GO SHOWER.
180
00:06:42,767 --> 00:06:44,627
- NEED A HAND?
181
00:06:44,633 --> 00:06:46,503
- CHECK OUT
RESTAURANT WEEK.
182
00:06:46,500 --> 00:06:47,930
CHECK OUT
RESTAURANT WEEK?
183
00:06:47,933 --> 00:06:49,073
CHECK OUT
RESTAURANT WEEK?
184
00:06:49,067 --> 00:06:50,727
CHECK OUT
RESTAURANT WEEK?
185
00:06:50,733 --> 00:06:52,733
CHECK OUT
RESTAURANT WEEK.
186
00:06:52,733 --> 00:06:55,073
- GET A JOB, DUDE.
187
00:06:55,067 --> 00:06:56,367
- THIS IS MY JOB.
188
00:06:56,367 --> 00:07:00,267
- CHECK OUT RESTAURANT WEEK.
- THANK YOU.
189
00:07:01,700 --> 00:07:04,500
- JANE.
190
00:07:04,500 --> 00:07:05,970
- JASON?
191
00:07:05,967 --> 00:07:08,767
- HEY.
- EXCUSE ME.
192
00:07:13,300 --> 00:07:16,470
- IT'S, UH--
IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU.
193
00:07:16,467 --> 00:07:18,527
- YOU TOO.
194
00:07:18,533 --> 00:07:21,273
- SO, UM, WHAT'S
GOING ON HERE?
195
00:07:21,267 --> 00:07:23,797
- I KNOW WHAT
YOU'RE THINKING:
196
00:07:23,800 --> 00:07:25,270
WHY DIDN'T I TELL YOU
WHEN WE FIRST MET
197
00:07:25,267 --> 00:07:26,627
THAT I WAS
AN UNDERCOVER COP?
198
00:07:26,633 --> 00:07:28,433
- [laughing]
NICE DISGUISE.
199
00:07:28,433 --> 00:07:29,473
- EASY, EASY.
200
00:07:29,467 --> 00:07:31,167
YOU MIGHT BLOW MY COVER.
- OH.
201
00:07:31,167 --> 00:07:32,567
ARE YOU ON
A STAKE-OUT?
202
00:07:32,567 --> 00:07:34,627
TRYING TO TAKE DOWN
A CORRUPT MUFFIN?
203
00:07:34,633 --> 00:07:37,373
- YEAH, IT'S THE TIP OF
A MASSIVE ILLEGAL PASTRY RING.
204
00:07:37,367 --> 00:07:38,367
- [laughing]
205
00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:41,070
- ACTUALLY...
206
00:07:41,067 --> 00:07:43,197
THERE'S SOMETHING I'D KIND OF
LIKE TO KNOW, SO...
207
00:07:43,200 --> 00:07:46,930
THAT MORNING,
AT MY HOUSE, YOU...
208
00:07:46,933 --> 00:07:48,473
UH, YOU...
209
00:07:48,467 --> 00:07:49,727
- HEY, I GOT A COFFEE.
210
00:07:49,733 --> 00:07:50,933
WE SHOULD GO
TO THE MEETING.
211
00:07:50,933 --> 00:07:53,733
- OH, JASON, THIS IS
MY COWORKER GRANT.
212
00:07:53,733 --> 00:07:55,403
- OH, UH, SORRY, HI.
213
00:07:55,400 --> 00:07:57,270
I DIDN'T REALIZE YOU WERE
TALKING TO A FRIEND.
214
00:07:57,267 --> 00:07:58,797
I'VE NEVER MET
A PROFESSIONAL CAKE BEFORE.
215
00:08:00,333 --> 00:08:02,073
IS THIS, LIKE,
WHAT YOU DO?
216
00:08:02,067 --> 00:08:04,967
- OH, NO, NO.
I DON'T DO THIS...
217
00:08:04,967 --> 00:08:07,867
I MEAN, RIGHT NOW, YES,
I DO DO THIS.
218
00:08:07,867 --> 00:08:09,167
I'VE DONE OTHER THINGS.
219
00:08:09,167 --> 00:08:10,967
I WAS AN
ASSISTANT BEFORE.
220
00:08:10,967 --> 00:08:13,167
NOT THAT THAT'S
NECESSARILY HIGHER
221
00:08:13,167 --> 00:08:14,827
ON THE EVOLUTIONARY
CHART, UH...
222
00:08:14,833 --> 00:08:17,533
I'M JUST SORT OF IN A
TRANSITION PHASE, YOU KNOW?
223
00:08:17,533 --> 00:08:19,503
THE RECESSION AND ALL
HAS SORT OF MESSED WITH
224
00:08:19,500 --> 00:08:21,430
MY FIVE-YEAR,
UH, PLAN, AND...
225
00:08:21,433 --> 00:08:24,973
THIS IS, UM...
226
00:08:24,967 --> 00:08:30,067
THIS IS, YOU KNOW--
IT'S LIKE A...TEMP THANG.
227
00:08:32,333 --> 00:08:34,533
- COOL. SO, UH...
228
00:08:34,533 --> 00:08:35,873
WE SHOULD PROBABLY
GO TO THAT MEETING.
229
00:08:35,867 --> 00:08:36,927
WE'RE GONNA BE LATE
FOR THE 5:30--
230
00:08:36,933 --> 00:08:39,233
- YES, RIGHT,
SHOOT, UM...
231
00:08:39,233 --> 00:08:42,473
SORRY, I GOTTA RUN.
BYE, JASON.
232
00:08:42,467 --> 00:08:43,567
- OH, OKAY.
233
00:08:43,567 --> 00:08:45,697
UH, BYE...JANE.
234
00:08:55,267 --> 00:08:57,697
- WHAT WAS UP
WITH THAT?
235
00:08:57,700 --> 00:09:01,070
- I'M READY
TO BAKE MY CAKE NOW.
236
00:09:02,833 --> 00:09:04,873
- DAMN IT, JAY,
ANSWER YOUR PHONE.
237
00:09:04,867 --> 00:09:06,897
- WHAT IS WRONG
WITH YOU?
238
00:09:06,900 --> 00:09:10,370
HEY, YOUR EYES
LOOK SAD.
239
00:09:10,367 --> 00:09:11,897
NOT RED AND SQUINTY
FROM DRUGS SAD,
240
00:09:11,900 --> 00:09:13,070
BUT EMOTION SAD.
241
00:09:13,067 --> 00:09:14,527
LIKE I'M GONNA
TELL YOU MY PROBLEMS
242
00:09:14,533 --> 00:09:15,833
SO YOU CAN
CALL ME A WHORE.
243
00:09:15,833 --> 00:09:21,203
- COME HERE.
244
00:09:21,200 --> 00:09:23,470
I CALL THIS
FORGETTING JUICE.
245
00:09:30,433 --> 00:09:31,773
- THANKS.
246
00:09:31,767 --> 00:09:34,067
- FOR WHAT?
247
00:09:34,067 --> 00:09:35,327
GET IT?
248
00:09:35,333 --> 00:09:36,403
FORGETTING JUICE.
249
00:09:36,400 --> 00:09:37,530
- [chuckling]
250
00:09:39,067 --> 00:09:40,697
- HERE, I'VE HAD ENOUGH.
251
00:09:40,700 --> 00:09:42,200
- YEAH, I WANT
MORE THAN ENOUGH.
252
00:09:42,200 --> 00:09:44,430
- I KNEW I'D
FIND YOU HERE.
253
00:09:44,433 --> 00:09:46,433
I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU BROUGHT
ANOTHER GUY TO OUR SPOT.
254
00:09:46,433 --> 00:09:48,073
- NOTHING'S GOING ON, JIMMY.
255
00:09:48,067 --> 00:09:49,797
NOT THAT IT'S ANY OF YOUR
BUSINESS, BECAUSE WE'RE OVER.
256
00:09:49,800 --> 00:09:52,770
- WATCH YOUR ASS, MAN.
257
00:09:52,767 --> 00:09:55,797
- GOD, I THINK
I SMOKED TOO MUCH.
258
00:09:55,800 --> 00:09:57,300
MY HEART'S BEATING
LIKE A HUMMINGBIRD'S.
259
00:09:57,300 --> 00:09:59,400
- YEAH, SOMETIMES MY BROTHER
PUTS EXTRA STUFF IN THERE.
260
00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:01,600
SALVIA, KETAMINE,
CAT TRANQS.
261
00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:03,930
OUR SHIFT'S ALMOST OVER.
COME ON.
262
00:10:03,933 --> 00:10:05,503
A DRINK WILL
MELLOW YOU OUT.
263
00:10:05,500 --> 00:10:08,800
- ALCOHOL ISN'T HELPING.
I FEEL WEIRDER.
264
00:10:08,800 --> 00:10:10,300
- JUST ROLL WITH IT.
265
00:10:10,300 --> 00:10:11,400
I'M GONNA GO
TO THE BATHROOM.
266
00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:13,600
- I DON'T THINK
I CAN ROLL.
267
00:10:13,600 --> 00:10:16,070
GEOMETRICALLY IMPOSSIBLE.
268
00:10:16,067 --> 00:10:18,727
- I HAD A BRETT ONCE.
269
00:10:18,733 --> 00:10:22,233
HER NAME WAS SHYAMALA.
OUR LOVE WAS HOT.
270
00:10:22,233 --> 00:10:25,733
WE USED TO DO IT EVERYWHERE.
LIKE SEX RABBITS.
271
00:10:25,733 --> 00:10:27,373
AND SHE TOLD ME
I WAS THE ONE.
272
00:10:27,367 --> 00:10:28,827
BUT I MUST HAVE BEEN
ONE OF MANY
273
00:10:28,833 --> 00:10:32,433
BECAUSE I CAUGHT HER
WITH MY FRIEND JOHNNY GUPTA
274
00:10:32,433 --> 00:10:34,203
UP IN HER BIG BOSOM.
275
00:10:34,200 --> 00:10:35,730
ALL UP IN THEM.
276
00:10:35,733 --> 00:10:37,773
- OH, THAT SUCKS.
- I KNOW.
277
00:10:37,767 --> 00:10:40,467
[phone ringing]
278
00:10:40,467 --> 00:10:42,027
- JAY, FINALLY.
279
00:10:42,033 --> 00:10:44,033
- TEEN, I'M
REALLY WASTED,
280
00:10:44,033 --> 00:10:46,573
AND I SAW JANE, WHO THINKS
I'M A PIECE OF CRAP
281
00:10:46,567 --> 00:10:48,027
BECAUSE I'M
A PIECE OF CAKE.
282
00:10:48,033 --> 00:10:49,933
- SLOW DOWN.
YOU SAW JANE?
283
00:10:49,933 --> 00:10:51,073
WHAT HAPPENED?
284
00:10:51,067 --> 00:10:52,427
- WELL, I DIDN'T
SWEEP HER OFF HER FEET
285
00:10:52,433 --> 00:10:53,803
TO GO LIVE
UNDER A RAINBOW.
286
00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:56,430
GOD, I AM SUCH AN IDIOT.
- JUST BREATHE.
287
00:10:56,433 --> 00:10:57,773
WHERE ARE YOU?
288
00:10:57,767 --> 00:10:59,697
- THE COASTER SAYS
WINDFALL PUB.
289
00:10:59,700 --> 00:11:03,500
SO...WINDFALL PUB.
- OKAY, I'M ON MY WAY.
290
00:11:03,500 --> 00:11:06,900
JUST DRINK A LOT OF WATER
AND, UH, THINK HAPPY THOUGHTS.
291
00:11:06,900 --> 00:11:08,870
OH, AND DO NOT LOOK
AT YOUR HANDS.
292
00:11:08,867 --> 00:11:10,427
IT FREAKS YOU OUT
WHEN YOU'RE HIGH.
293
00:11:10,433 --> 00:11:13,703
- OKAY. BYE.
294
00:11:13,700 --> 00:11:14,800
UGH.
295
00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:16,430
- I'VE GOT TO GO.
296
00:11:16,433 --> 00:11:19,133
HEY, HOW DID YOU
GET OVER SHYAMALA?
297
00:11:19,133 --> 00:11:21,473
- I GIVE JOHNNY GUPTA
FOOD POISONING.
298
00:11:21,467 --> 00:11:22,467
- REALLY?
299
00:11:22,467 --> 00:11:26,467
- NO, NO,
I WOULD NEVER...
300
00:11:26,467 --> 00:11:27,867
- [laughing]
301
00:11:27,867 --> 00:11:30,067
THANKS, BOBBY.
- YOU'RE WELCOME, TINA.
302
00:11:30,067 --> 00:11:33,097
I MEAN, WHORE FRIEND
OF JASON.
303
00:11:35,067 --> 00:11:38,527
- OKAY, MUSIC IS ON,
304
00:11:38,533 --> 00:11:40,073
GUAC'S IN THE HANDS,
305
00:11:40,067 --> 00:11:41,297
PUNCH IS OUT.
306
00:11:41,300 --> 00:11:42,770
- CAN I JUST TAKE
THIS ENTIRE LIGHTING SCHEME
307
00:11:42,767 --> 00:11:45,427
FROM BORING...
TO AWESOME?
308
00:11:49,433 --> 00:11:53,533
OKAY, THIS IS...BAD.
LIKE WE HAVE A SECRET ROOM
309
00:11:53,533 --> 00:11:56,633
WHERE WE CAGE HUMANS
AND HARVEST THEIR SKIN BAD.
310
00:11:56,633 --> 00:11:59,773
- OKAY, DON'T PANIC.
WE CAN STILL SAVE THIS.
311
00:11:59,767 --> 00:12:02,627
WE'LL JUST GO BACK
TO OUR REGULAR LIGHTING
312
00:12:02,633 --> 00:12:04,473
AND PUT THE KEG
IN THE HALLWAY.
313
00:12:04,467 --> 00:12:05,597
- I WAS TALKING
ABOUT YOUR CREEPY HANDS,
314
00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:07,100
AND I DON'T GET IT.
315
00:12:07,100 --> 00:12:08,600
YOU DON'T EVEN LISTEN
TO THIS ENYA-TYPE STUFF.
316
00:12:08,600 --> 00:12:10,230
- SOMETIMES I DO.
317
00:12:10,233 --> 00:12:11,503
- [snickering]
- OKAY, FINE, I DON'T.
318
00:12:11,500 --> 00:12:12,600
BUT WHAT ABOUT YOU?
319
00:12:12,600 --> 00:12:13,930
WHEN WE WENT
TO MY COUSIN'S
320
00:12:13,933 --> 00:12:15,303
BIRTHDAY PARTY
AT RUTGERS LAST MONTH,
321
00:12:15,300 --> 00:12:17,130
IT WAS EXACTLY LIKE THE PARTY
YOU'RE TRYING TO THROW,
322
00:12:17,133 --> 00:12:19,333
AND YOU KEPT COMPLAINING
THAT YOU WERE TOO OLD FOR THIS.
323
00:12:19,333 --> 00:12:21,073
- FINE, LISTEN,
YOU'RE RIGHT, BUT SOMETIMES...
324
00:12:21,067 --> 00:12:23,627
I JUST WANNA SHOW PEOPLE
THAT WE STILL KNOW HOW TO PARTY.
325
00:12:23,633 --> 00:12:28,073
- I WANT TO SHOW PEOPLE THAT
WE'VE MOVED PAST JUST PARTYING.
326
00:12:28,067 --> 00:12:29,397
BUT I DON'T KNOW
WHY I THOUGHT
327
00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:32,130
THAT INVOLVED
PUNCH AND EASY LISTENING.
328
00:12:32,133 --> 00:12:35,133
- LOOK, WE'RE GONNA THROW
TONS OF PARTIES, ALL RIGHT?
329
00:12:35,133 --> 00:12:37,503
SO TONIGHT, WE'LL SHOW EVERYONE
HOW MATURE WE ARE.
330
00:12:37,500 --> 00:12:40,070
AND AT OUR NEXT PARTY,
WE'LL PROVE TO EVERYONE
331
00:12:40,067 --> 00:12:41,167
THAT WE CAN
STILL THROW DOWN.
332
00:12:41,167 --> 00:12:42,727
- SOUNDS GREAT.
333
00:12:42,733 --> 00:12:44,133
- BUT I'M IN CHARGE
OF THE MUSIC.
334
00:12:44,133 --> 00:12:45,373
AND NO HANDS.
335
00:12:45,367 --> 00:12:47,127
THE HANDS MUST GO.
- OKAY.
336
00:12:47,133 --> 00:12:49,203
- UP TOP.
- YEAH.
337
00:12:49,200 --> 00:12:52,170
- YOU'RE DEHYDRATED.
THIS'LL MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER.
338
00:12:52,167 --> 00:12:54,567
- YEAH, WELL, MAYBE
THIS'LL MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER.
339
00:12:56,167 --> 00:12:57,167
- NO, THANK YOU.
340
00:12:57,167 --> 00:12:58,797
- SORRY, I MISREAD THAT.
341
00:12:58,800 --> 00:13:00,570
THOUGHT YOU
WERE FEELING ME.
342
00:13:00,567 --> 00:13:03,667
YOU WANNA JUST
THUMB-WRESTLE INSTEAD?
343
00:13:03,667 --> 00:13:06,297
- WHOA, JAY, NICE LOOK.
344
00:13:06,300 --> 00:13:07,430
ARE YOU TOO DEPRESSED
FOR ME TO MOCK
345
00:13:07,433 --> 00:13:09,703
THE FULL BETTY CROCKER,
OR CAN I GO FOR IT?
346
00:13:09,700 --> 00:13:11,230
- TINA.
347
00:13:11,233 --> 00:13:13,403
- UH, PULL IT
TOGETHER, JAY.
348
00:13:13,400 --> 00:13:15,230
MAN, I THOUGHT
I WAS MESSED UP.
349
00:13:15,233 --> 00:13:17,233
YOU SAW JANE LIKE THIS?
350
00:13:17,233 --> 00:13:19,133
- I DON'T WANNA
TALK ABOUT JANE.
351
00:13:19,133 --> 00:13:22,533
THIS IS CORN, SHE'S SO NICE.
I REALLY LIKE HER,
352
00:13:22,533 --> 00:13:25,203
WHICH IS WEIRD,
'CAUSE USUALLY I HATE CORN.
353
00:13:25,200 --> 00:13:27,100
- YOU KNOW
WHO I HATE? BRETT.
354
00:13:27,100 --> 00:13:30,200
HE WAS BASICALLY DRY-HUMPING
SOME SHUFFLEBOARD SLUT
355
00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:32,270
WHEN I SHOWED UP.
IT WAS BRUTAL, JAY.
356
00:13:32,267 --> 00:13:34,097
- THAT'S HORRIBLE.
357
00:13:34,100 --> 00:13:36,400
OH, MY GOD, THE WORLD
IS A HORRIBLE PLACE.
358
00:13:36,400 --> 00:13:38,800
THIS PLACE IS
A HORRIBLE PLACE.
359
00:13:38,800 --> 00:13:40,830
LET'S GET OUT OF HERE AND GO
TO STACEY AND ERIC'S PARTY.
360
00:13:40,833 --> 00:13:42,133
- AWW.
- HEY, C, YOU WANNA COME?
361
00:13:42,133 --> 00:13:43,633
- REALLY? YOU STILL
WANNA GO TO THAT?
362
00:13:43,633 --> 00:13:45,803
THE IDEA OF BEING AROUND
HAPPY COUPLES RIGHT NOW
363
00:13:45,800 --> 00:13:47,500
MAKES ME FEEL LIKE
I WANNA SHAVE MY HEAD
364
00:13:47,500 --> 00:13:49,270
AND FASHION MY HAIR
INTO A NOOSE.
365
00:13:49,267 --> 00:13:51,527
- HEY! SULLY JUST TOLD ME
YOU KISSED MY GIRL.
366
00:13:51,533 --> 00:13:53,773
YOU AND ME.
OUTSIDE. NOW.
367
00:13:53,767 --> 00:13:56,167
- JIMMY, NO.
- SHUT UP.
368
00:13:56,167 --> 00:13:57,297
- HEY, DON'T TALK
TO HER LIKE THAT.
369
00:13:57,300 --> 00:13:58,530
- MIND YOUR
BUSINESS, BITCH.
370
00:13:58,533 --> 00:14:00,633
- HEY, DON'T TALK
TO HER LIKE THAT.
371
00:14:00,633 --> 00:14:03,933
YEAH, WHOSE GOT YOUR BACK?
CAKE GUY DOES.
372
00:14:03,933 --> 00:14:05,273
[general gasps]
373
00:14:05,267 --> 00:14:06,467
- JIMMY.
374
00:14:06,467 --> 00:14:08,967
YOU'RE AN ANIMAL.
- [lascivious snicker]
375
00:14:11,167 --> 00:14:14,327
- JAY, ARE YOU OKAY?
- OH!
376
00:14:14,333 --> 00:14:16,773
- OOH.
377
00:14:21,100 --> 00:14:22,530
- [whimpering]
- WHAT HURTS?
378
00:14:22,533 --> 00:14:25,633
- MY WALLET.
THE COSTUME'S RUINED,
379
00:14:25,633 --> 00:14:27,433
JB'S GONNA MAKE ME
PAY FOR IT.
380
00:14:27,433 --> 00:14:30,233
I CAN'T PAY FOR IT,
NOT WITH MONEY.
381
00:14:30,233 --> 00:14:32,703
- OKAY, WE SHOULD GO
TO STACEY AND ERIC'S.
382
00:14:32,700 --> 00:14:35,200
IF ANYBODY CAN GET A STAIN
OUT OF SYNTHETIC FABRIC,
383
00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:37,730
IT'S ERIC.
384
00:14:37,733 --> 00:14:40,473
- HOW MUCH DOES
MY PARTY ROCK?
385
00:14:40,467 --> 00:14:43,597
- SO MUCH. I-I FEEL
LIKE I'M ON JAY-Z'S YACHT.
386
00:14:43,600 --> 00:14:45,770
- I'M GONNA GO MINGLE.
- MINGLE.
387
00:14:45,767 --> 00:14:47,867
- UH, HEY, LENCH.
388
00:14:47,867 --> 00:14:50,067
- GREAT PARTY, DOCTOR.
- THANK YOU, SIR.
389
00:14:50,067 --> 00:14:52,527
- SO, UH, ANY SINGLE GIRLS
HERE FOR ME,
390
00:14:52,533 --> 00:14:54,933
OR ANYONE HERE
INTO THE LIFESTYLE?
391
00:14:54,933 --> 00:14:56,733
- UH, WHAT--WHAT LIFESTYLE?
- YOU KNOW.
392
00:14:56,733 --> 00:14:59,873
SHARING AND CARING.
NO RULES, NO HANG-UPS.
393
00:14:59,867 --> 00:15:01,297
- I DON'T THINK SO, LENCH.
- COME ON.
394
00:15:01,300 --> 00:15:03,130
WE CAN TALK
LIKE MEN, MAN.
395
00:15:03,133 --> 00:15:05,633
DON'T MAKE IT WEIRD JUST BECAUSE
I USED TO DATE STACE.
396
00:15:05,633 --> 00:15:07,373
IN FACT, WE CAN TALK
ABOUT THAT, IF YOU WANT TO.
397
00:15:07,367 --> 00:15:08,667
I HAVE STORIES.
398
00:15:08,667 --> 00:15:10,427
- UH, YES, SHE TOLD ME THE ONE
ABOUT THE BABY CARROTS.
399
00:15:10,433 --> 00:15:11,533
- SHE TOLD YOU THAT?
400
00:15:11,533 --> 00:15:12,973
WELL, LOOK, YOU THINK THAT
EMBARRASSES ME?
401
00:15:12,967 --> 00:15:14,967
THAT DOESN'T EMBARRASS ME.
I'M PROUD OF THAT.
402
00:15:14,967 --> 00:15:16,397
THERE'S, LIKE,
FIVE PEOPLE ON EARTH
403
00:15:16,400 --> 00:15:18,600
THAT CAN PEEL A CARROT THAT WAY.
[doorbell ringing]
404
00:15:18,600 --> 00:15:20,330
- I GOTTA, UH, GET THIS.
405
00:15:22,100 --> 00:15:24,830
HEY, UH...
- WHERE ARE YOUR SOAPS?
406
00:15:24,833 --> 00:15:28,433
- WHY ARE YOU A CAKE?
407
00:15:28,433 --> 00:15:29,673
WHAT THE HELL
IS WRONG WITH JASON?
408
00:15:29,667 --> 00:15:32,927
- STACEY, YOU LOOK
REALLY PRETTY.
409
00:15:32,933 --> 00:15:35,533
I MIGHT KISS
YOUR PRETTY LITTLE WIFE.
410
00:15:35,533 --> 00:15:37,203
YOU KNOW, BRETT
KISSES OTHER GIRLS,
411
00:15:37,200 --> 00:15:39,570
SO MAYBE I SHOULD
TRY IT, RIGHT?
412
00:15:39,567 --> 00:15:41,797
ASS-HEAD HIPSTER IDIOT.
413
00:15:41,800 --> 00:15:44,530
HEY, PUNCH!
414
00:15:59,733 --> 00:16:03,203
- TINA. I THOUGHT
I SMELLED SASSY.
415
00:16:03,200 --> 00:16:04,930
- LENCH, I WILL
CUT OUT YOUR RETINA
416
00:16:04,933 --> 00:16:07,503
WITH THE JAGGED LID FROM A CAN
OF SOUP, I SWEAR TO GOD.
417
00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:09,670
- RELAX, I'M JUST
BEING FRIENDLY.
418
00:16:09,667 --> 00:16:12,497
- BE FRIENDLY FROM AT--AT LEAST
THREE FEET AWAY FROM ME.
419
00:16:16,067 --> 00:16:20,227
- TINA, SO YOU--
420
00:16:20,233 --> 00:16:21,273
I'LL CATCH UP LATER.
421
00:16:26,867 --> 00:16:28,197
- HANDS! HANDS!
422
00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:31,370
STACE!
423
00:16:31,367 --> 00:16:33,497
STACE!
424
00:16:33,500 --> 00:16:36,070
[laughter and murmurs]
425
00:16:36,067 --> 00:16:38,167
UH, I-I-I--
426
00:16:38,167 --> 00:16:40,127
I COULDN'T GET THE STAINS
OUT OF MY COSTUME
427
00:16:40,133 --> 00:16:43,233
'CAUSE OF
THE TUB OF HANDS.
428
00:16:47,067 --> 00:16:49,227
UM...
429
00:16:53,900 --> 00:16:57,800
I'M GONNA
MAKE A TOAST.
430
00:16:57,800 --> 00:16:59,730
TO STACEY AND ERIC.
431
00:16:59,733 --> 00:17:02,073
YOU TWO HAVE IT
ALL FIGURED OUT, I MEAN...
432
00:17:02,067 --> 00:17:06,067
YOU'RE IN LOVE,
YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANT.
433
00:17:06,067 --> 00:17:07,397
HOW DO YOU KNOW?
I HAVE NO IDEA.
434
00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:09,930
- UH, OKAY, UH, JAY,
I-I THINK THAT--
435
00:17:09,933 --> 00:17:11,333
- NO, ERIC, NO.
436
00:17:11,333 --> 00:17:16,833
SEE MOST OF US, WE DON'T
JUST GET TO FIGURE IT ALL OUT.
437
00:17:16,833 --> 00:17:19,603
GET A COOL JOB,
438
00:17:19,600 --> 00:17:22,100
MEET A GIRL WHO POOPS
CHOCOLATE ICE CREAM.
439
00:17:23,267 --> 00:17:27,067
SOME OF US ARE THE LOSERS
OF OUR FRIENDS.
440
00:17:27,067 --> 00:17:30,067
THAT'S ME, IN CASE
YOU WERE WONDERING.
441
00:17:30,067 --> 00:17:32,797
WE THINK WE'RE
CORPSE #1 MATERIAL BUT...
442
00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:36,300
MAYBE WE'RE ONLY
CUT OUT TO BE CAKE.
443
00:17:36,300 --> 00:17:38,070
POINT IS...
444
00:17:38,067 --> 00:17:41,197
THE POINT IS...
445
00:17:42,667 --> 00:17:45,197
TINA YOU'RE...MAKING ME LOSE
MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT.
446
00:17:48,600 --> 00:17:50,130
- SOMEBODY SHOULD
VIDEOTAPE THIS.
447
00:17:50,133 --> 00:17:51,173
I MEAN, IT'S
JUST SOFT STUFF,
448
00:17:51,167 --> 00:17:54,867
BUT AS KISSING VIDS GO,
THIS IS GOLDEN.
449
00:17:54,867 --> 00:17:57,727
MORE TONGUE.
450
00:18:02,167 --> 00:18:04,427
- TINA.
451
00:18:04,433 --> 00:18:06,073
TINA?
- UH...
452
00:18:06,067 --> 00:18:08,627
UGH. ADVIL.
453
00:18:08,633 --> 00:18:10,933
- MY MOUTH
TASTES LIKE PENNIES.
454
00:18:10,933 --> 00:18:12,773
- HEY, YOU GUYS.
455
00:18:12,767 --> 00:18:15,097
- GOOD MORNING.
- [evil laugh]
456
00:18:15,100 --> 00:18:16,570
- BEFORE YOU GUYS YELL,
457
00:18:16,567 --> 00:18:19,427
AND YOU HAVE EVERY RIGHT
TO BE MAD AT US,
458
00:18:19,433 --> 00:18:22,933
BUT MAYBE YOU COULD
JUST WRITE, LIKE, AN EMAIL
459
00:18:22,933 --> 00:18:26,403
WITH A LOT OF EXCLAMATION MARKS
INSTEAD, 'CAUSE...
460
00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:27,800
A LOUD NOISE
COULD KILL ME RIGHT NOW.
461
00:18:27,800 --> 00:18:29,730
- DID WE TOTALLY
RUIN YOUR PARTY?
462
00:18:29,733 --> 00:18:31,533
- OH, DOESN'T MATTER.
NEXT ONE'S AN ERIC PARTY.
463
00:18:31,533 --> 00:18:33,203
IT'LL MORE THAN
MAKE UP FOR IT.
464
00:18:33,200 --> 00:18:34,430
- NO, IT'S FINE.
465
00:18:34,433 --> 00:18:36,803
HALF MY LAW SCHOOL FRIENDS
TOOK UNDIE PICS OF YOU,
466
00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:38,370
AND POSTED THEM
ON...EVERYWHERE,
467
00:18:38,367 --> 00:18:40,597
SO EVERYONE
STILL HAD A GOOD TIME.
468
00:18:40,600 --> 00:18:42,600
- SO, TEEN, LENCH
YOUR BOYFRIEND NOW?
469
00:18:42,600 --> 00:18:43,970
- IF I WASN'T
SO HUNG-OVER,
470
00:18:43,967 --> 00:18:47,067
I'D SAY SOMETHING WITTY
ABOUT YOUR MANJAMAS, BUT...
471
00:18:47,067 --> 00:18:49,897
I AM, SO I'M JUST
GONNA GO PEE.
472
00:18:49,900 --> 00:18:51,870
UGH...
473
00:18:53,067 --> 00:18:54,697
[groans]
NO!
474
00:18:54,700 --> 00:18:56,200
- OH, GOOD,
YOU'RE HERE.
475
00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:58,900
LISTEN, I KNOW WE KIND OF
HOOKED UP LAST NIGHT,
476
00:18:58,900 --> 00:19:01,330
BUT I CAN'T REALLY BE
IN A RELATIONSHIP RIGHT NOW.
477
00:19:01,333 --> 00:19:03,133
I RESPECT YOU ENOUGH
TO TELL YOU--
478
00:19:03,133 --> 00:19:04,873
- GET OUT OF HERE,
I HAVE TO PEE.
479
00:19:04,867 --> 00:19:08,097
- OH, I'M GOOD.
IT'S COOL, I WON'T LOOK.
480
00:19:08,100 --> 00:19:13,270
- UGH. OH, GOD.
481
00:19:13,267 --> 00:19:15,727
- I MIGHT LOOK.
JUST BEING HONEST.
482
00:19:15,733 --> 00:19:17,503
I RESPECT YOU ENOUGH
TO BE HONEST WITH YOU
483
00:19:17,500 --> 00:19:19,730
ABOUT LOOKING
AT YOU PEE MAYBE--
484
00:19:19,733 --> 00:19:21,673
IF YOU--
IT'D BE--WHOA!
485
00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:30,870
- OH, WHO SENT ME
THE SAD STRIPPER?
486
00:19:30,867 --> 00:19:32,567
YOU KNOW, YOU'RE SUPPOSED
TO JUMP OUT OF THE CAKE,
487
00:19:32,567 --> 00:19:34,367
NOT CARRY IT.
- I RUINED THE COSTUME.
488
00:19:34,367 --> 00:19:35,897
I'M SORRY,
I WILL PAY FOR IT.
489
00:19:35,900 --> 00:19:37,170
I DON'T KNOW HOW.
I MAY BE...
490
00:19:37,167 --> 00:19:39,597
SENDING YOU INSTALLMENTS
FROM THE LEMONADE STAND I SET UP
491
00:19:39,600 --> 00:19:42,500
OUTSIDE MY PARENTS' PLACE,
BUT SOMEHOW, I WILL PAY.
492
00:19:42,500 --> 00:19:44,830
- I KNEW YOU'D COME BEGGING
FOR YOUR JOB BACK.
493
00:19:44,833 --> 00:19:46,803
- HUH? NO, NO, NO,
I'M NOT--
494
00:19:46,800 --> 00:19:48,130
- BECAUSE IF
WHAT YOU'RE DOING,
495
00:19:48,133 --> 00:19:50,873
IF IT COUNTS AS BEGGING,
496
00:19:50,867 --> 00:19:53,297
THEN YES, YOU CAN HAVE
YOUR JOB BACK.
497
00:19:53,300 --> 00:19:56,470
- YES.
498
00:19:56,467 --> 00:19:58,427
YES, I AM,
I'M BEGGING
499
00:19:58,433 --> 00:20:00,433
FOR MY JOB BACK.
- THEN SAY PLEASE.
500
00:20:00,433 --> 00:20:05,603
SAY, "PLEASE, I BEG YOU, JB,
SWEET, MERCIFUL GOD OF THUNDER."
501
00:20:05,600 --> 00:20:07,070
- PLEASE?
502
00:20:09,300 --> 00:20:11,530
- ALL RIGHT.
COME TO MAMA.
503
00:20:11,533 --> 00:20:14,033
[chuckling]
- OH.
504
00:20:14,033 --> 00:20:15,933
SO YOU--
YOU FIRED ROGER.
505
00:20:15,933 --> 00:20:17,133
- NO, HE QUIT.
506
00:20:17,133 --> 00:20:18,973
SOMETHING ABOUT
A HOSTILE WORK ENVIRONMENT.
507
00:20:18,967 --> 00:20:20,027
- OH.
508
00:20:20,033 --> 00:20:22,173
- WELCOME HOME,
PUPPY DOG.
509
00:20:22,167 --> 00:20:23,267
WELCOME HOME.
36707
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