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Previously on
The Big Bang Theory...
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Guess I'm your new neighbor. Penny.
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00:00:05,720 --> 00:00:07,598
- Leonard. Sheldon.
- Hi.
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00:00:07,680 --> 00:00:10,149
- Hi.
- Hi.
5
00:00:10,600 --> 00:00:11,600
That's where I sit.
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00:00:11,680 --> 00:00:14,639
Howard Wolowitz.
Caltech Department of Applied Physics.
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Penny?
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Leonard.
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00:00:16,920 --> 00:00:17,920
Raj?
10
00:00:18,240 --> 00:00:20,480
He speaks English.
He just can't speak to women.
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00:00:21,040 --> 00:00:23,191
Our babies will be smart and beautiful.
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00:00:23,280 --> 00:00:24,316
Finally caught a break.
13
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Soft kitty...
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You know my girlfriend, Bernadette.
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Howard, I'm home!
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Warm kitty...
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00:00:34,520 --> 00:00:36,671
Little ball of fur...
18
00:00:36,760 --> 00:00:38,831
I'm Amy Farrah Fowler.
You're Sheldon Cooper.
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00:00:41,040 --> 00:00:42,040
- Bazinga.
- Whoa!
20
00:00:47,280 --> 00:00:50,159
Welcome to the premiere episode
of Sheldon Cooper Presents:
21
00:00:50,240 --> 00:00:51,390
Fun with Flags.
22
00:00:51,480 --> 00:00:54,712
I'm going up in space.
Technically, I'm an astronaut.
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Oy vey!
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You're talking to me.
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I am.
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Ah!
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00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:06,439
Bernadette Maryann Rostenkowski...
28
00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:10,070
We now pronounce you
husband and wife.
29
00:01:10,520 --> 00:01:11,520
Amy?
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00:01:11,720 --> 00:01:12,720
Howard?
31
00:01:13,160 --> 00:01:14,160
Angry Amy?
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I don't want you to say it
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00:01:15,600 --> 00:01:17,456
just because
social convention dictates that you...
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I love you, too.
35
00:01:18,680 --> 00:01:20,751
- Will you marry me?
- Yes.
36
00:01:21,400 --> 00:01:22,400
We did it!
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00:01:22,480 --> 00:01:24,870
Well, I enjoyed that
more than I thought I would.
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00:01:26,560 --> 00:01:27,835
I wonder which one's Halley.
39
00:01:31,920 --> 00:01:32,920
Will you marry me?
40
00:01:33,200 --> 00:01:36,511
That means positive?
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Super asymmetry, that's it!
42
00:01:39,720 --> 00:01:42,554
Our paper was right. We did it!
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- We did it?
- We did it!
44
00:01:46,520 --> 00:01:49,399
Six times ten to the eighth
atoms of radium in a lead jar
45
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Six times ten to the eighth
atoms of radium
46
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If the half-life of radium
should happen to pass
47
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Three times ten to the eighth
atoms of radium in a lead jar...
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Really hope you're almost to zero.
49
00:01:59,880 --> 00:02:01,872
No, see,
that's the beauty of half-lives.
50
00:02:01,960 --> 00:02:04,236
It's impossible to determine
when you'll arrive at zero.
51
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It's like Wheels on the Bus
52
00:02:06,120 --> 00:02:08,589
if the bus had
an unknowable number of parts.
53
00:02:10,120 --> 00:02:11,520
Yeah, we're gonna need more coffee.
54
00:02:11,560 --> 00:02:14,314
Yep. I'm with you. Leonard, coffee?
55
00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:16,232
Black and strong, like Luke Cage.
56
00:02:17,880 --> 00:02:20,315
I'm too tired
to even be disturbed by that.
57
00:02:20,800 --> 00:02:22,837
- Sheldon?
- Absolutely not, no.
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The Nobel committee
will be making the calls to inform
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00:02:25,560 --> 00:02:27,836
the winners at any minute,
so the only drug I need
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00:02:27,960 --> 00:02:29,838
is the endorphins
pumping through my brain
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00:02:29,960 --> 00:02:31,599
in anticipation of our victory.
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00:02:31,680 --> 00:02:33,876
Well, technically,
anticipation wouldn't be mediated
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00:02:33,960 --> 00:02:36,191
by endorphins as much as dopamine,
but, you know,
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you've been up all night,
so I'll give you that one.
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00:02:42,520 --> 00:02:45,399
Really? The second he stops talking?
66
00:02:45,480 --> 00:02:47,278
Well, should we wake him up?
67
00:02:47,360 --> 00:02:51,593
Well, he did say if he fell asleep,
we were allowed to slap him awake.
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00:02:54,160 --> 00:02:55,514
Oh, boy.
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00:02:56,400 --> 00:02:58,039
Wait a minute. Why do you get to do it?
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- 'Cause I called it.
- Well, you can't just call it.
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00:03:00,120 --> 00:03:02,555
- You have to earn it.
- Oh, and you've earned it?
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00:03:02,640 --> 00:03:04,996
No one has earned it more than me.
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You have your whole life
to smack him around.
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This is my time.
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Fine. Don't miss.
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00:03:17,360 --> 00:03:19,397
It's not a volleyball. I can handle it.
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00:03:21,120 --> 00:03:22,554
Oh, wait. Hang on.
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00:03:22,680 --> 00:03:24,760
When you're old,
you are gonna want a record of this.
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00:03:24,840 --> 00:03:25,876
Oh! Yeah.
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00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:28,634
Do it in slo-mo.
I want to see his cheeks ripple.
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00:03:30,240 --> 00:03:31,640
Ready... Go.
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It's happening!
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Unknown caller. It's got to be them.
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Okay, put it on speaker.
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00:03:38,440 --> 00:03:39,715
- Hello?
- Hi.
86
00:03:39,800 --> 00:03:41,678
Hello. This is Sweden calling.
87
00:03:44,160 --> 00:03:46,595
Is this Dr. Cooper and Dr. Fowler?
88
00:03:46,680 --> 00:03:47,680
- Yes.
- Yeah.
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Congratulations.
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It is my pleasure to inform you
that you've won the Nobel Prize
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in being suckers!
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00:03:59,360 --> 00:04:01,431
His Swedish accent was very convincing.
93
00:04:02,560 --> 00:04:04,950
This is it!
94
00:04:06,240 --> 00:04:07,594
What do you want, Howard?
95
00:04:07,680 --> 00:04:09,637
We were just calling to see
if you'd heard yet.
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00:04:09,720 --> 00:04:10,720
We haven't.
97
00:04:10,800 --> 00:04:12,837
But thank you
for getting up so early to call.
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00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:13,990
That was very thoughtful.
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00:04:14,080 --> 00:04:16,675
Oh, please. We have two little kids.
We've been up for an hour.
100
00:04:18,120 --> 00:04:19,793
Did anyone get to slap Sheldon?
101
00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:21,553
No.
102
00:04:21,640 --> 00:04:23,199
Okay, well, call us when you hear.
103
00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:25,915
All right, now what?
104
00:04:26,680 --> 00:04:28,672
Oh, why don't we play a game
to pass the time?
105
00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:31,036
Here. I am thinking of a number.
106
00:04:31,120 --> 00:04:33,794
Hint, it's a cube of a cube of a prime.
107
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There's an infinite number
of possibilities.
108
00:04:36,240 --> 00:04:37,674
What, you got somewhere to be?
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Oh! That's me.
110
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Hello?
111
00:04:44,360 --> 00:04:46,033
Yes, this is Dr. Fowler.
112
00:04:48,200 --> 00:04:49,395
I see.
113
00:04:50,600 --> 00:04:51,920
Okay, thank you.
114
00:04:55,680 --> 00:04:56,680
We won.
115
00:05:04,280 --> 00:05:07,432
- Congratulations!
- Oh, my God!
116
00:05:07,520 --> 00:05:09,751
- We did it.
- I know.
117
00:05:09,840 --> 00:05:11,274
Can you believe it?
118
00:05:11,360 --> 00:05:13,750
That's a good point.
What if I'm dreaming?
119
00:05:21,440 --> 00:05:22,999
We won the Nobel Prize!
120
00:05:27,080 --> 00:05:30,357
Our whole universe
was in a hot dense state
121
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Then nearly fourteen billion years ago
expansion started...
122
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Wait!
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00:05:34,680 --> 00:05:35,716
The earth began to cool
124
00:05:35,800 --> 00:05:36,960
The autotrophs began to drool
125
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Neanderthals developed tools
126
00:05:38,680 --> 00:05:40,717
We built a wall
We built the pyramids
127
00:05:40,800 --> 00:05:43,315
Math, science, history
Unraveling the mystery
128
00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:45,392
It all started with the Big Bang!
129
00:05:45,480 --> 00:05:46,709
Bang!
130
00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:56,199
How does it feel
to be married to a Nobel Prize winner?
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You tell me.
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Oh, Amy-centric.
What a fun way to look at it.
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00:06:01,360 --> 00:06:03,431
- I think so.
- You would. That makes sense.
134
00:06:03,520 --> 00:06:04,670
Oh!
135
00:06:05,960 --> 00:06:08,873
Aw! It's a congratulations text
from my Meemaw.
136
00:06:08,960 --> 00:06:10,056
Oh!
137
00:06:10,080 --> 00:06:11,799
And there's one from my mom.
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00:06:11,880 --> 00:06:13,440
And my sister.
139
00:06:13,560 --> 00:06:15,056
And my brother.
140
00:06:15,080 --> 00:06:16,736
And my brother's ex-wife.
141
00:06:16,760 --> 00:06:18,840
My brother's other ex-wife.
142
00:06:19,200 --> 00:06:20,936
Boy, they don't tell you
when you win a Nobel
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it chews up your phone battery.
144
00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:25,400
Oh! That's me.
145
00:06:27,400 --> 00:06:29,437
It's CVS. My prescription's ready.
146
00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:32,151
Oh! And also my dad.
147
00:06:32,240 --> 00:06:34,516
He says congratulations and he loves me.
148
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Nothing about me? Oh!
149
00:06:37,280 --> 00:06:38,680
Oh, it's your dad. I'm good.
150
00:06:40,240 --> 00:06:43,119
You know, when you think about it,
now that we're Nobel Prize winners,
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00:06:43,200 --> 00:06:45,396
our names
will be linked together forever.
152
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We're married.
153
00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:48,392
Our names are already
linked together forever.
154
00:06:48,480 --> 00:06:51,440
Please. That's just a piece of paper.
This is a piece of paper and a medal.
155
00:06:53,680 --> 00:06:55,717
It's weird.
I don't really feel different,
156
00:06:55,800 --> 00:06:58,190
but I guess our lives
will never be the same.
157
00:06:58,280 --> 00:07:01,079
I don't know.
We're going to work like always.
158
00:07:01,440 --> 00:07:03,591
I still put my pants on
both legs at a time.
159
00:07:04,880 --> 00:07:07,076
One day that's gonna end very badly.
160
00:07:09,000 --> 00:07:10,593
Dr. Cooper?
161
00:07:13,160 --> 00:07:15,117
Congratulations. How does it feel?
162
00:07:15,200 --> 00:07:17,669
Okay, we're happy
to answer your questions,
163
00:07:17,760 --> 00:07:19,353
just, one at a time, please?
164
00:07:19,440 --> 00:07:20,440
Dr. Cooper!
165
00:07:23,080 --> 00:07:24,400
Is Dr. Cooper coming back?
166
00:07:24,480 --> 00:07:26,199
No. Next question.
167
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Was it your left hand
or your right hand?
168
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Right.
169
00:07:35,240 --> 00:07:37,197
Spit actually flew out of his mouth.
170
00:07:38,960 --> 00:07:39,960
Hey, fellas.
171
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Can you do me a favor?
172
00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:44,116
Do we have a choice?
173
00:07:44,280 --> 00:07:46,078
Ha-ha! No.
174
00:07:47,240 --> 00:07:49,516
Sheldon and Amy
are now officially superstars,
175
00:07:49,600 --> 00:07:52,560
and the press will be reaching out
to their family and friends for comment.
176
00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:54,757
So that we're all on the same page,
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00:07:54,840 --> 00:07:57,992
the word we're gonna use
to describe them is "quirky."
178
00:07:58,120 --> 00:08:00,430
And not quirky. More like quirky.
179
00:08:00,520 --> 00:08:02,352
So not Mr. and Mrs. Wackadoodle?
180
00:08:04,440 --> 00:08:07,512
You bitter, envious little man.
181
00:08:12,520 --> 00:08:14,273
Thank you so much.
182
00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:20,593
And what do we call that?
183
00:08:20,680 --> 00:08:22,000
- Quirky.
- Quirky.
184
00:08:25,120 --> 00:08:27,840
Dr. Cooper,
can I get a minute of your time?
185
00:08:29,520 --> 00:08:32,877
- Hello?
- Hey. Can I help you?
186
00:08:32,960 --> 00:08:33,960
Yeah, actually.
187
00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:36,674
Um, I had an appointment
to interview Dr. Cooper about the Nobel.
188
00:08:37,320 --> 00:08:39,596
Hang on a second. Sheldon?
189
00:08:46,680 --> 00:08:48,000
Sorry, he's not here.
190
00:08:49,120 --> 00:08:51,032
Damn. I've got a deadline.
191
00:08:51,640 --> 00:08:53,916
I don't know if it helps you at all,
192
00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:56,196
but I'm his best friend
in the whole world.
193
00:08:57,440 --> 00:08:58,510
Really?
194
00:08:58,640 --> 00:08:59,518
And an astronaut.
195
00:08:59,520 --> 00:09:02,281
Come on, you can buy me a cup of coffee,
and I'll tell you about both.
196
00:09:11,640 --> 00:09:13,393
Everyone okay in there?
197
00:09:13,480 --> 00:09:14,550
Go away!
198
00:09:15,560 --> 00:09:16,560
Amy?
199
00:09:17,160 --> 00:09:18,913
Raj, please, not now.
200
00:09:19,000 --> 00:09:20,320
Hey, what's wrong?
201
00:09:21,880 --> 00:09:24,714
My picture's all over the Internet,
and I look terrible.
202
00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:26,393
No. Let me see.
203
00:09:27,160 --> 00:09:28,913
Well, that is an unfortunate angle.
204
00:09:30,600 --> 00:09:34,594
But who cares? You just won the Nobel.
You should be proud of this moment.
205
00:09:35,240 --> 00:09:37,197
I know I shouldn't care
about how I look,
206
00:09:37,280 --> 00:09:38,350
and I never thought I did.
207
00:09:38,440 --> 00:09:41,751
It's stupid and shallow,
but I just can't help it.
208
00:09:41,840 --> 00:09:44,400
Am I really this frumpy?
209
00:09:44,520 --> 00:09:47,513
No. No, you are a beautiful woman.
210
00:09:48,600 --> 00:09:50,176
By the way,
if you're not happy with those pictures,
211
00:09:50,200 --> 00:09:51,759
then make some changes.
212
00:09:51,840 --> 00:09:55,993
Get a haircut, new clothes,
new glasses, big glasses...
213
00:09:56,080 --> 00:09:58,675
No glasses, then you won't be able
to see those pictures.
214
00:10:00,320 --> 00:10:01,549
Sounds expensive.
215
00:10:02,400 --> 00:10:04,551
Excuse me, if I'm not mistaken,
216
00:10:04,640 --> 00:10:06,836
the Nobel comes with
a substantial cash prize.
217
00:10:06,960 --> 00:10:08,240
What were you gonna spend it on?
218
00:10:09,480 --> 00:10:11,073
Hadn't really thought about it.
219
00:10:11,760 --> 00:10:14,116
Sheldon's got his eyes
on some new Dockers.
220
00:10:15,920 --> 00:10:17,559
Come on. Do something for yourself.
221
00:10:18,720 --> 00:10:20,757
Well, I suppose I could get a haircut.
222
00:10:21,360 --> 00:10:24,717
And some makeup and a new wardrobe
223
00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:26,837
and a little thank-you gift
for your shopping buddy
224
00:10:26,920 --> 00:10:28,440
if we see something he likes. Come on.
225
00:10:28,880 --> 00:10:30,155
Where are we going?
226
00:10:30,240 --> 00:10:32,550
Beverly Hills,
where the things he likes are.
227
00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:38,036
Dinner ready?
228
00:10:38,120 --> 00:10:39,395
Not unless you cooked.
229
00:10:42,040 --> 00:10:45,078
Why is this article about Sheldon
all about you?
230
00:10:46,920 --> 00:10:48,240
Let me see.
231
00:10:48,320 --> 00:10:50,118
Oh, good, they used my NASA picture.
232
00:10:52,280 --> 00:10:54,397
Why does it say that
you're his best friend?
233
00:10:54,480 --> 00:10:55,675
Leonard's his best friend.
234
00:10:55,800 --> 00:10:59,032
No. Leonard has always been
kind of a monkey butler.
235
00:11:00,520 --> 00:11:03,831
Whenever Sheldon got into a scrape,
I was his go-to guy.
236
00:11:04,440 --> 00:11:06,113
When did he get into a scrape?
237
00:11:06,840 --> 00:11:08,194
You're kidding, right?
238
00:11:08,280 --> 00:11:09,760
Remember when he had a panic attack
239
00:11:09,840 --> 00:11:11,336
'cause his hand got stuck
in a jar of olives?
240
00:11:11,360 --> 00:11:13,716
I was the one who told him
to let go of the olives.
241
00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:19,231
Please, that doesn't make you
his best friend.
242
00:11:20,920 --> 00:11:24,914
You know, that reporter asked me
if I could put him in touch with
243
00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:26,556
Amy's best friend.
244
00:11:26,640 --> 00:11:27,640
That's Penny.
245
00:11:27,720 --> 00:11:29,200
Doesn't have to be.
246
00:11:34,920 --> 00:11:39,995
Hmm. What kind of tea is appropriate
for winning a Nobel Prize
247
00:11:40,080 --> 00:11:43,915
and now everything is changing
and you feel unmoored from reality?
248
00:11:45,280 --> 00:11:46,760
I don't know. Earl Grey?
249
00:11:48,320 --> 00:11:49,356
You know,
250
00:11:49,440 --> 00:11:51,352
this is something
I've wanted my whole life.
251
00:11:51,480 --> 00:11:54,040
But I guess I never considered
how everything would be different.
252
00:11:54,240 --> 00:11:56,880
Buddy, I know it all feels
overwhelming right now,
253
00:11:56,960 --> 00:11:58,872
but I promise you,
things will settle down.
254
00:11:58,960 --> 00:12:00,792
There's no Earl Grey! You filthy liar!
255
00:12:04,360 --> 00:12:05,278
Hey, is Penny here?
256
00:12:05,280 --> 00:12:06,280
No. Why?
257
00:12:06,320 --> 00:12:08,835
I wanted to show her my latest creation.
258
00:12:08,920 --> 00:12:10,036
I give you...
259
00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:12,992
Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler.
260
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Wow. Amy, you look amazing.
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Thank you.
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Sheldon, what do you think?
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I like you better the way you were.
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But she looks beautiful!
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Classic lines,
colors that complement her skin tone,
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and hair that goes from "office"
to "on the town" in minutes.
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I don't care. Put it back.
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I like the way I look.
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Well, I don't!
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My fault. I was out of Earl Grey.
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Sheldon, that was really rude.
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I'm sorry.
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Amy is the one constant I can count on,
and now she's changing.
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It's just a haircut and some clothes.
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No, it's the last straw!
I can't take any more!
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Can you believe it?
They finally fixed the elevator.
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This is a nightmare.
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What's with him?
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He won a Nobel Prize,
and his wife looks amazing.
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Oh! Yeah, got it.
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How did you get down here?
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The elevator. It's really fast.
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I need to be alone right now.
Don't try to follow me.
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All right. You need a ride?
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That'd be great. Thank you.
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I should've seen this coming.
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Stop. You're allowed to get a haircut.
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I know.
But I should've done it gradually.
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You know, like...
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Maybe 300 tiny haircuts
over a 10-year period.
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Okay, you need to focus on the positive.
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You won a Nobel Prize.
I slapped Sheldon.
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A lot of dreams came true today.
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You know, you're right.
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This is a huge day for me,
and I'm allowed to enjoy it
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without worrying
how it's going to affect my husband.
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Is it me
or did it just get fierce in here?
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All this change is just too much.
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The reporters, the attention at work,
and now even Amy's changed.
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- Whoa, whoa, whoa! Slow down.
- I'm playing a drinking game.
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Every time you say the word "change,"
I take a slug.
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Are you gonna be able to drive me home?
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Hmm. Not unless you change the subject.
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Oh.
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Now I said it.
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You know, you're the only person
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who could win
the biggest prize in science
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and still be upset about it.
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It's just...
All the times I thought about winning,
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I never thought about how it would...
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Affect my life.
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I'm sorry, I'm genuinely
concerned about your liver.
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Okay. Fine, I'll stop playing.
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You know, you go on and on about
wanting things to stay the same,
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but you've changed a lot
since I met you.
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Oh, you are a mean drunk.
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I'm serious.
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You have a ton of friends,
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you got married,
moved into a new apartment,
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you wore a baseball hat that one time.
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Heck, you've had sex almost
as many times as I have fingers.
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More.
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By this many.
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You dog!
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- It was the Avengers trailer.
- Oh.
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You know, I've grown, too.
I used to be the bartender back there.
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That's true.
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And now there is
a completely different woman
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who botched my drink order.
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How hard is 65% Coke, 35% Diet Coke?
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Well, judging by the look on her face,
it's at least one percent saliva.
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I do take your point.
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You know, you're also married,
you have a successful career,
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you no longer dress like you're trying
to attract sailors by the wharf.
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So, I guess the only thing
that actually stays the same
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is that things are always changing.
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Interesting.
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So you're saying
the inevitability of change
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might be a universal constant.
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Well, there's a little more to it
than that, but, yeah, sure.
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Oh! Hey, look, that's Bernadette.
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I can't tell you how many times
Dr. Fowler was gonna give up
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and I would say to her,
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"Amy, as your best friend,
I'm not gonna let you quit."
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Okay, I'm drinking again.
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I'll join you. Waitress,
95% Hawaiian Punch, 5% vodka.
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Let me tell you about the time.
Mr. Nobel Laureate wanted olives...
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This is a good one.
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You know what, 90/10!
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You know, I like the way my hair looks.
I'm done tiptoeing around him.
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- We're all guilty of it.
- But why?
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- 'Cause we were afraid to upset him.
- Which happens anyway.
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Well, that's over.
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I'm done enabling him.
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Like, this is his spot
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and the thermostat has to be set
to his comfort level,
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even though
he doesn't even live here anymore
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and I'm always chilly.
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Is that why
you wear a hoodie all the time?
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Why would... Yes!
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To accommodate Sheldon!
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And what about this thing?
Why is it here? I'll tell you why.
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Because it was here when I moved in,
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and, for no earthly reason,
he forbade me to touch it.
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Well, if you don't like it,
get rid of it.
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Put it in the closet.
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You know what,
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I will.
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I bet that's the reason.
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Hang on.
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What do you think?
Want to give it a try?
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Well, you know, the elevator did work
when I moved into the building.
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So going up and down the stairs
was a change,
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which means this would actually
be a return to the status quo.
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- But, conversely, I think...
- Get in!
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This is wild.
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