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1
00:00:02,044 --> 00:00:03,671
LEONARD: Previously
on The Big Bang Theory...
2
00:00:04,463 --> 00:00:05,806
Want to grab some lunch?
3
00:00:06,548 --> 00:00:08,391
You know what? I don't think so.
4
00:00:08,467 --> 00:00:10,140
Well, let me guess, you're not eating
5
00:00:10,219 --> 00:00:13,723
because the mean girls circled
your chubby bits in marker?
6
00:00:14,765 --> 00:00:16,187
No. That, that right there.
7
00:00:16,266 --> 00:00:18,735
That's the reason.
You're always making fun of me.
8
00:00:19,144 --> 00:00:20,612
Those are just jokes.
9
00:00:20,687 --> 00:00:22,985
It's my way of saying
that we're friends,
10
00:00:23,065 --> 00:00:25,989
and it wouldn't hurt you to drop a few.
11
00:00:27,444 --> 00:00:29,867
Fifteen years of constant ridicule.
12
00:00:30,197 --> 00:00:33,167
I think our relationship
has become toxic.
13
00:00:33,450 --> 00:00:35,248
(STUTTERS) What are you saying?
14
00:00:36,745 --> 00:00:39,248
I think you and I need to spend
some time away from each other.
15
00:00:41,500 --> 00:00:42,752
Look, I...
16
00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:45,045
I can see you're upset, but...
17
00:00:45,170 --> 00:00:48,549
I'm gonna need some ground rules.
18
00:00:48,966 --> 00:00:51,890
While we're apart,
can I see other needy Indian men?
19
00:00:52,010 --> 00:00:53,307
Get out!
20
00:00:56,890 --> 00:00:58,813
Hi Stuart, two questions.
21
00:00:58,892 --> 00:01:00,986
Do you have the new Aquaman,
22
00:01:01,144 --> 00:01:04,739
and do you mind if I use your
back room to smoke some meat?
23
00:01:07,317 --> 00:01:08,364
Well, since it's you asking,
24
00:01:08,443 --> 00:01:11,697
I'm gonna guess that's not a euphemism.
25
00:01:12,823 --> 00:01:14,416
Why are you smoking meat?
26
00:01:14,491 --> 00:01:16,664
And why are you reading Aquaman?
27
00:01:17,703 --> 00:01:21,048
I am trying to make Amy
a historically accurate
28
00:01:21,123 --> 00:01:24,377
Little House on the Prairie
dinner for her birthday, and
29
00:01:24,459 --> 00:01:27,804
I want to be able to say I was
reading it before it was cool.
30
00:01:28,505 --> 00:01:30,303
Wow, well, that's actually really sweet.
31
00:01:30,382 --> 00:01:32,976
The dinner thing.
The Aquaman thing's dumb.
32
00:01:34,469 --> 00:01:37,268
Is-Isn't Halley's birthday
the same as Amy's?
33
00:01:37,347 --> 00:01:39,566
Yeah, but we're not doing
anything big 'cause she's one,
34
00:01:39,641 --> 00:01:42,770
Bernadette's on bed rest, and I'm lazy.
35
00:01:44,688 --> 00:01:45,735
Hell, guys.
36
00:01:45,814 --> 00:01:47,236
- Hello.
- Hey.
37
00:01:47,941 --> 00:01:49,193
Howard.
38
00:01:49,318 --> 00:01:50,535
Raj.
39
00:01:51,403 --> 00:01:52,996
Excuse me.
40
00:01:53,655 --> 00:01:55,498
Really? ls this still happening?
41
00:01:55,574 --> 00:01:58,373
I'm willing to make up,
but someone's being a baby.
42
00:01:58,452 --> 00:02:01,296
(EXCLAIMS)
I do love a riddle. Let me see.
43
00:02:01,997 --> 00:02:03,715
See, my first guess would be Halley,
44
00:02:03,790 --> 00:02:05,667
but that'd be strange to
accuse her of being a baby
45
00:02:05,751 --> 00:02:07,253
'cause she is a baby.
46
00:02:07,336 --> 00:02:09,179
Erm, I suppose it could be Stuart,
47
00:02:09,254 --> 00:02:11,848
his head does have
a certain milky scent.
48
00:02:15,552 --> 00:02:16,769
Although...
49
00:02:16,845 --> 00:02:19,644
It's me, Sheldon.
He's calling me a baby.
50
00:02:19,723 --> 00:02:23,193
No, I don't know. I saw Leonard
put his keys in his mouth today.
51
00:02:24,603 --> 00:02:26,856
You're a grown man. Act like it.
52
00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:30,109
Big talk coming from a guy
holding an Archie comic book.
53
00:02:30,192 --> 00:02:33,321
Hey, werewolf Jughead
is not your dad's Jughead.
54
00:02:34,071 --> 00:02:37,075
Come on, you guys have been
friends forever. Quit fighting.
55
00:02:37,157 --> 00:02:38,283
I have an extra ticket
56
00:02:38,367 --> 00:02:39,835
to the opening of The Last Jedi tonight.
57
00:02:39,910 --> 00:02:42,208
It was gonna be Howard's,
but you can have it.
58
00:02:42,621 --> 00:02:44,168
You two had a good run.
59
00:02:45,791 --> 00:02:47,793
(THEME SONG PLAYING)
60
00:03:12,484 --> 00:03:14,737
Who wants to go see
Last Jedi again tonight?
61
00:03:14,820 --> 00:03:16,367
- L'm in.
- Me, too.
62
00:03:16,446 --> 00:03:18,995
It'll be nice to see the parts
I missed while I was blinking.
63
00:03:20,450 --> 00:03:21,827
Hey, guys, there's a change of plans.
64
00:03:21,910 --> 00:03:24,459
We are having a party
for Halley's birthday after all.
65
00:03:24,538 --> 00:03:28,759
Turns out Bernadette and "anyone
who's not a heartless monster"
66
00:03:28,834 --> 00:03:31,178
thinks that's the right thing to do.
67
00:03:31,420 --> 00:03:33,889
I don't like kids,
but I do like birthday cake.
68
00:03:33,964 --> 00:03:36,968
No. Wait, will there be
sugary icing flowers on it?
69
00:03:37,134 --> 00:03:38,351
I don't know.
70
00:03:38,552 --> 00:03:40,554
I'll risk it.
71
00:03:40,846 --> 00:03:43,520
But if I have a tantrum and have
to leave early, you'll know why.
72
00:03:45,308 --> 00:03:48,027
Here you go. Here you go.
73
00:03:49,771 --> 00:03:51,148
See you two there.
74
00:03:51,231 --> 00:03:52,357
Are you kidding me?
75
00:03:52,441 --> 00:03:54,318
You're not gonna invite me
to Halley's birthday?
76
00:03:54,401 --> 00:03:56,495
I'm her godfather, that means something.
77
00:03:56,653 --> 00:03:59,782
Or, hear me out on this. It doesn't.
78
00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:02,246
Okay, that's enough.
79
00:04:02,325 --> 00:04:05,829
This fight either has to end
or get way more entertaining.
80
00:04:06,621 --> 00:04:09,921
Don't worry about it 'cause
I'm done putting up with him!
81
00:04:15,505 --> 00:04:17,348
I know you have a lot on your mind,
82
00:04:17,424 --> 00:04:19,927
but when do you think we'll have
an answer on those cake flowers?
83
00:04:23,972 --> 00:04:26,100
- Hey.
- Hey. What you reading?
84
00:04:26,183 --> 00:04:27,856
It's your brother's Christmas letter.
85
00:04:28,018 --> 00:04:31,272
Ugh. If there's a picture
of his wife and his kids
86
00:04:31,354 --> 00:04:34,073
and his clogs and his horses
all in matching pajamas,
87
00:04:34,149 --> 00:04:36,117
I beg you to burn it.
88
00:04:36,651 --> 00:04:39,279
(EXCLAIMS) The people's pajamas
have little horses on them,
89
00:04:39,362 --> 00:04:41,785
and the horses have little people.
90
00:04:42,532 --> 00:04:45,160
It's just his chance to brag
about how great his life is.
91
00:04:45,243 --> 00:04:46,369
Oh, come on, it's nice.
92
00:04:46,453 --> 00:04:48,000
You know that nonprofit he works with?
93
00:04:48,079 --> 00:04:50,081
They built a hospital in Rwanda.
94
00:04:50,332 --> 00:04:53,506
"Look at me.
I built a hospital in Rwanda."
95
00:04:54,628 --> 00:04:57,381
That is a good point.
I hadn't thought of it that way.
96
00:04:58,048 --> 00:04:59,391
- Hello.
- Hey.
97
00:04:59,466 --> 00:05:02,686
So this is for Amy's birthday.
Can I leave it here?
98
00:05:02,844 --> 00:05:03,891
Sure. What is it?
99
00:05:03,970 --> 00:05:05,267
A butter churn.
100
00:05:05,347 --> 00:05:07,224
Ooh. That's what I got her.
101
00:05:08,934 --> 00:05:12,234
It's for her surprise
frontier birthday dinner.
102
00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:13,780
I am making
103
00:05:13,855 --> 00:05:16,404
hardtack, boiled salt pork,
104
00:05:16,483 --> 00:05:20,454
and because it's a special day,
a chewable gob of tree sap.
105
00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:23,494
Is that good?
106
00:05:23,573 --> 00:05:25,496
Compared to other foods, no.
107
00:05:25,575 --> 00:05:27,498
Compared to other parts of a tree?
Meh.
108
00:05:30,455 --> 00:05:33,584
And then after dinner,
we will have birthday coitus.
109
00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:37,679
Do you think that will also
be historically accurate?
110
00:05:37,796 --> 00:05:40,140
I assume like the rest of frontier life,
111
00:05:40,215 --> 00:05:42,434
it'll be exhausting and short.
112
00:05:43,552 --> 00:05:45,429
You're exhausting and short.
113
00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:54,734
Hey, Stuart, you're coming
to Halley's party, right?
114
00:05:55,105 --> 00:05:58,405
You bet.
Plus, I live there and I was invited,
115
00:05:58,483 --> 00:06:01,032
so it's already better
than my 10th birthday party.
116
00:06:02,487 --> 00:06:04,990
- Great. Can you bring a few things?
- Sure. What do you need?
117
00:06:05,073 --> 00:06:06,290
Balloons, streamers,
118
00:06:06,366 --> 00:06:08,414
ice, snacks, a bounce house,
face painter,
119
00:06:08,493 --> 00:06:10,086
and a couple kids whose parents
are willing to lie and say
120
00:06:10,161 --> 00:06:12,459
they know me from the Daddy
and Me class I've never been to.
121
00:06:13,957 --> 00:06:15,800
Where do you and Halley go every week?
122
00:06:15,917 --> 00:06:17,715
The important thing is we're together,
123
00:06:17,794 --> 00:06:20,718
and if the movie gets
too violent, I cover her eyes.
124
00:06:22,549 --> 00:06:24,472
Don't stress about this party.
125
00:06:24,551 --> 00:06:26,178
She's one, she's not gonna remember.
126
00:06:26,261 --> 00:06:29,265
The other day I showed her
her toe, and she was shocked.
127
00:06:30,974 --> 00:06:32,942
It's not for the baby,
it's for Bernadette.
128
00:06:33,059 --> 00:06:34,356
She's feeling guilty
129
00:06:34,436 --> 00:06:36,939
about all the stuff
she's missing with Halley.
130
00:06:37,022 --> 00:06:38,239
All right.
131
00:06:38,315 --> 00:06:40,238
Uncle Stuart's got your back.
132
00:06:40,358 --> 00:06:42,577
Ain't no party like a Stuart party
133
00:06:42,652 --> 00:06:46,122
because Stuart's
never invited to parties.
134
00:06:51,536 --> 00:06:53,334
Did the electricity go out?
135
00:06:53,872 --> 00:06:55,749
I don't know what you mean
by "electricity," ma'am.
136
00:06:55,832 --> 00:06:59,132
lam just a farmer boy living in
a little house on the prairie.
137
00:07:01,838 --> 00:07:03,806
(SQUEALS)
138
00:07:05,550 --> 00:07:06,802
I'm glad you're happy.
139
00:07:06,885 --> 00:07:09,308
I wanted to do something special
for your birthday.
140
00:07:09,387 --> 00:07:13,312
(LAUGHING) You did,
you did! It's perfect!
141
00:07:13,475 --> 00:07:15,398
You do know that my birthday's
tomorrow, right?
142
00:07:15,560 --> 00:07:18,655
This is just step one
of your birthday weekend.
143
00:07:18,772 --> 00:07:22,777
Now, would you care to join me
for an authentic frontier dinner
144
00:07:22,859 --> 00:07:24,236
made entirely from scratch?
145
00:07:24,319 --> 00:07:27,448
(LAUGHS) I can't believe you did this.
It's amazing!
146
00:07:27,530 --> 00:07:29,453
Oh, it's not a big deal.
147
00:07:29,532 --> 00:07:31,580
Just to be clear, it was a big deal.
148
00:07:33,578 --> 00:07:35,672
I was being modest. You got that, right?
149
00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:37,874
- Loud and clear.
- Well, I hope you're hungry.
150
00:07:37,958 --> 00:07:39,175
Oh, I'm starving.
151
00:07:39,250 --> 00:07:43,346
Oh, good. Starvation is authentic
to the time period.
152
00:07:44,631 --> 00:07:46,258
If you also have malaria
153
00:07:46,341 --> 00:07:48,139
and a deep distrust of Native Americans,
154
00:07:48,218 --> 00:07:50,312
we're really cooking with a wood stove.
155
00:07:51,137 --> 00:07:52,514
Is that butter?
156
00:07:52,597 --> 00:07:54,474
Yes. But don't blow it all
on one biscuit.
157
00:07:54,599 --> 00:07:56,317
Took me nine hours to make that.
158
00:07:57,352 --> 00:07:59,855
I think I got churner's elbow.
159
00:08:00,647 --> 00:08:02,820
I know we only have coitus
on my birthday,
160
00:08:02,899 --> 00:08:05,698
but I don't know if I can wait
until midnight.
161
00:08:06,736 --> 00:08:08,454
Well, you'll be glad you did.
162
00:08:08,530 --> 00:08:10,248
Everyone knows the best foreplay
163
00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:12,542
is rigid adherence to a strict schedule.
164
00:08:17,414 --> 00:08:18,666
Hey. What are you doing?
165
00:08:18,748 --> 00:08:21,592
Oh, I've decided to write
my own Christmas letter.
166
00:08:21,668 --> 00:08:22,669
So I'm gonna make a list
167
00:08:22,752 --> 00:08:24,299
of all the cool things we did this year.
168
00:08:24,504 --> 00:08:26,472
Oh! Fun. Can I help?
169
00:08:26,548 --> 00:08:29,643
Yes. Can you think of a single
cool thing we did this year?
170
00:08:31,177 --> 00:08:34,101
We“, both of our 'gobs are going great.
171
00:08:34,431 --> 00:08:37,275
Sure. I mean, my Air Force
project got taken away,
172
00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:40,229
and you're not crazy about
selling pharmaceuticals.
173
00:08:41,980 --> 00:08:44,574
I'll just write down "still employed."
174
00:08:45,942 --> 00:08:47,990
Oh!
We had our second anniversary.
175
00:08:48,069 --> 00:08:49,537
Yeah, but we did
176
00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:50,826
kind of forget about it,
177
00:08:50,905 --> 00:08:54,079
so... Maybe just write "still married."
178
00:08:56,161 --> 00:08:57,754
LEONARD: Great. Okay.
179
00:08:58,121 --> 00:08:59,998
Okay, that's a start.
180
00:09:01,249 --> 00:09:03,001
What else?
181
00:09:05,587 --> 00:09:09,342
You know, maybe this is enough.
182
00:09:10,884 --> 00:09:13,979
Let's look at our pictures.
That'll jog our memories.
183
00:09:15,305 --> 00:09:16,602
What is that a picture of?
184
00:09:16,681 --> 00:09:19,184
Oh, that's a mole on my back.
185
00:09:21,436 --> 00:09:23,279
I wanted to make sure
it wasn't growing, so...
186
00:09:24,272 --> 00:09:26,149
How'd you get a picture
of your own back?
187
00:09:26,232 --> 00:09:28,280
Sheldon took it.
We're kind of mole buddies.
188
00:09:31,112 --> 00:09:32,580
Hey, that's a cute picture.
189
00:09:32,739 --> 00:09:34,457
Isn't that the day
we almost went to the beach?
190
00:09:34,532 --> 00:09:35,533
Memorial Day?
191
00:09:35,617 --> 00:09:37,745
No, that was the day we almost
went to the mountains.
192
00:09:37,827 --> 00:09:39,170
Oh.
193
00:09:39,496 --> 00:09:40,998
That's the great thing about California,
194
00:09:41,081 --> 00:09:42,082
you can almost go to the mountains
195
00:09:42,165 --> 00:09:43,212
and almost go to the beach
in the same day.
196
00:09:43,291 --> 00:09:44,759
Yeah.
197
00:09:46,795 --> 00:09:47,796
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
198
00:09:52,258 --> 00:09:53,885
Look, I'm sorry about
not inviting you
199
00:09:53,968 --> 00:09:55,936
to Halley's birthday.
That wasn't cool.
200
00:09:56,012 --> 00:09:58,515
And of course we would
love to have you. Here.
201
00:10:00,517 --> 00:10:02,519
Thank you.
I'd really like to be there.
202
00:10:02,602 --> 00:10:05,651
Great, 'cause it's tomorrow,
and I need you to plan it.
203
00:10:08,149 --> 00:10:09,321
What?
204
00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:10,401
Stuart was gonna help,
205
00:10:10,485 --> 00:10:12,863
but the free clinic had
an open spot for a colonoscopy,
206
00:10:12,946 --> 00:10:14,493
and he jumped on it.
207
00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:19,745
Wait, so you're just apologizing
because you need something?
208
00:10:20,161 --> 00:10:23,461
Yes, and I think it's pretty
mature of me to admit it.
209
00:10:23,665 --> 00:10:25,667
Well, that's very insulting.
210
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:28,503
Right again.
Are you gonna help me or not?
211
00:10:29,003 --> 00:10:30,846
No, I will not help you.
212
00:10:33,591 --> 00:10:35,434
But I will help Halley.
213
00:10:35,885 --> 00:10:37,979
She's my goddaughter, and I love her.
214
00:10:38,388 --> 00:10:39,685
And I have a lot of party favors
215
00:10:39,764 --> 00:10:41,812
left over from
Cinnamon's birthday, so...
216
00:10:43,685 --> 00:10:46,859
I hope she likes things that
squeak when you chew on them.
217
00:10:47,605 --> 00:10:50,449
She's a human being, not an animal.
218
00:10:50,525 --> 00:10:52,698
But that actually would be a hit.
219
00:10:55,989 --> 00:10:57,616
Can I get you anything else?
220
00:10:58,074 --> 00:11:00,748
No, thanks. I think I'm good.
221
00:11:00,827 --> 00:11:03,797
You sure?
There's still plenty of pork fat.
222
00:11:04,706 --> 00:11:07,459
Although, if we don't eat it,
I suppose we could turn it into soap.
223
00:11:09,043 --> 00:11:10,966
That might taste better.
224
00:11:14,257 --> 00:11:16,351
I think I'm just gonna go over here
and sit on the couch.
225
00:11:16,718 --> 00:11:19,722
Great. Then we will move on
to stage two,
226
00:11:19,804 --> 00:11:21,932
the pitching of woo.
227
00:11:23,892 --> 00:11:25,439
Ooh! (CHUCKLES)
228
00:11:27,312 --> 00:11:31,192
Should I read you some bawdy
19th century limericks?
229
00:11:31,608 --> 00:11:32,951
(CHUCKLES) Okay.
230
00:11:33,234 --> 00:11:34,281
Oh, here.
231
00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:37,034
"There once was a priest
from Terre Haute
232
00:11:37,197 --> 00:11:39,791
"who purchased a sheep and a goat..."
233
00:11:41,576 --> 00:11:42,873
Hold on a second.
234
00:11:43,077 --> 00:11:44,624
Is it getting hot in here?
235
00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:46,877
Well, I didn't even get
to the dirty part yet.
236
00:11:48,499 --> 00:11:50,297
No, I'm serious.
237
00:11:50,835 --> 00:11:53,054
Do you think there was
something wrong with that food?
238
00:11:53,338 --> 00:11:56,057
Frontier scallops? I shouldn't think so.
239
00:11:57,467 --> 00:11:59,310
My stomach's feeling a little weird.
240
00:11:59,427 --> 00:12:01,771
Yeah. Mine, too.
241
00:12:01,888 --> 00:12:05,392
I'm sure it's just the first
sharp cramps of arousal.
242
00:12:12,440 --> 00:12:14,693
No. This doesn't feel right.
243
00:12:14,776 --> 00:12:17,529
Hey, hey, save that sexy talk
for the bedroom.
244
00:12:19,948 --> 00:12:21,791
You know, if you'll excuse me,
245
00:12:21,866 --> 00:12:25,166
lam just going to go freshen up.
246
00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:29,465
(VOMITING)
247
00:12:30,333 --> 00:12:31,334
Sheldon?
248
00:12:31,417 --> 00:12:32,794
SHELDON: I'll be out in a minute.
249
00:12:33,461 --> 00:12:35,304
I don't have a minute!
250
00:12:36,047 --> 00:12:37,048
(VOMITING)
251
00:12:42,345 --> 00:12:44,768
I can't believe you pulled
this all together overnight.
252
00:12:44,889 --> 00:12:47,642
If I had more time, I could
have gotten the Blue Man Group.
253
00:12:49,018 --> 00:12:50,736
One of them goes to my dry cleaner.
254
00:12:50,853 --> 00:12:52,947
Who, by the way, hates him.
255
00:12:54,148 --> 00:12:55,445
You really saved the day.
256
00:12:55,525 --> 00:12:57,869
Well, it's not for you. It's for Halley.
257
00:12:58,069 --> 00:12:59,116
And I'm sure
258
00:12:59,195 --> 00:13:02,825
she'd appreciate it, if she knew
what's going on or who you are.
259
00:13:11,207 --> 00:13:12,584
Morning.
260
00:13:12,792 --> 00:13:14,419
Happy birthday.
261
00:13:14,961 --> 00:13:16,929
Yeah, sure.
262
00:13:19,132 --> 00:13:20,725
Did you sleep at all?
263
00:13:20,842 --> 00:13:22,890
No. You?
264
00:13:23,303 --> 00:13:26,102
I passed out on the toilet once.
265
00:13:27,140 --> 00:13:29,268
I don't know if that counts.
266
00:13:30,268 --> 00:13:31,360
Feel any better?
267
00:13:31,519 --> 00:13:33,613
I feel terrible.
268
00:13:35,356 --> 00:13:37,074
Well, (SIGHS)
269
00:13:37,984 --> 00:13:40,203
should we make love now?
270
00:13:41,738 --> 00:13:44,287
How can you even think about sex?
271
00:13:44,365 --> 00:13:48,211
Hey, I'm a man,
I have annual needs just like anyone.
272
00:13:49,037 --> 00:13:52,041
And besides,
it's our birthday tradition.
273
00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:55,840
You think you can do it
274
00:13:56,085 --> 00:13:59,214
while I lie perfectly still
and you don't touch me?
275
00:14:01,632 --> 00:14:03,509
I can try.
276
00:14:09,557 --> 00:14:11,685
Want to do it again?
277
00:14:14,562 --> 00:14:16,735
- Morning.
- Morning.
278
00:14:17,398 --> 00:14:20,026
"Kept Fern alive"? Who's Fern?
279
00:14:22,445 --> 00:14:24,664
No, the fern. The one in the bathroom.
280
00:14:25,031 --> 00:14:27,955
We're really calling
that brown thing alive? Okay.
281
00:14:30,078 --> 00:14:32,046
So, how long have you
been working on this?
282
00:14:32,121 --> 00:14:33,543
(SIGHS) Couple of hours.
283
00:14:33,623 --> 00:14:36,843
I took a break to try to beat
my high score on Mario Kart.
284
00:14:37,043 --> 00:14:38,511
Well, did you do it?
285
00:14:38,753 --> 00:14:40,471
Do you see it on the board?
286
00:14:41,589 --> 00:14:43,967
Okay, this is silly.
Our lives are great.
287
00:14:44,050 --> 00:14:45,097
I think so, too.
288
00:14:45,218 --> 00:14:47,312
So then why is this bugging you so much?
289
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:52,226
I guess it feels like everyone's
moving forward, and we're stuck.
290
00:14:52,308 --> 00:14:53,309
What do you mean?
291
00:14:53,393 --> 00:14:57,569
Well, we've been married two years.
Should we think about what's next?
292
00:14:57,647 --> 00:15:00,241
Like buying a house or having a baby?
293
00:15:00,316 --> 00:15:02,159
Look, I want to do
all those things someday,
294
00:15:02,235 --> 00:15:03,953
but there's a bunch of stuff
I want to do first.
295
00:15:04,112 --> 00:15:05,204
Okay, like what?
296
00:15:05,446 --> 00:15:08,791
I don't know, stay thin and have money.
297
00:15:09,659 --> 00:15:11,161
No, no, I'm serious.
298
00:15:11,244 --> 00:15:13,588
If there's things we want to do,
let's start doing them.
299
00:15:13,955 --> 00:15:16,879
Okay. Well, we've never been
on a big trip together.
300
00:15:17,083 --> 00:15:18,209
I would love that.
301
00:15:18,292 --> 00:15:19,589
Okay, there's something for your letter.
302
00:15:19,669 --> 00:15:22,343
"Considered going on a trip."
303
00:15:24,340 --> 00:15:25,637
It's just a day trip,
304
00:15:25,716 --> 00:15:28,265
but we could take the ferry
out to Catalina.
305
00:15:28,386 --> 00:15:29,683
Great, let's do it.
306
00:15:29,929 --> 00:15:32,273
Amy's in the bathroom and I need to...
307
00:15:34,851 --> 00:15:35,852
(SHELDON VOMITING)
308
00:15:38,813 --> 00:15:41,157
It's like I can hear the ocean already.
309
00:15:44,068 --> 00:15:46,662
Okay. Thanks for letting me know.
310
00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:48,163
Hey, What's going on?
311
00:15:48,239 --> 00:15:51,334
Bernadette's sister's kids are sick
and they're not coming.
312
00:15:51,576 --> 00:15:54,580
But they're the whole reason
the cupcakes are vegan!
313
00:15:55,830 --> 00:15:58,253
- BERNADETTE: How's the party coming?
- Good!
314
00:15:58,499 --> 00:16:01,378
Great! Our friends
should be here any second!
315
00:16:01,711 --> 00:16:04,464
Those are the only
other people you invited?
316
00:16:04,547 --> 00:16:06,845
What about the kids
from the Daddy and Me class?
317
00:16:06,924 --> 00:16:08,346
Grow up.
318
00:16:12,180 --> 00:16:14,353
- Uh-oh.
- What?
319
00:16:14,432 --> 00:16:16,355
I left the food out.
320
00:16:16,767 --> 00:16:19,020
You afraid it's gonna go good?
321
00:16:23,191 --> 00:16:24,989
How are you feeling?
322
00:16:25,610 --> 00:16:29,035
My stomach aches, I got the chills,
323
00:16:29,489 --> 00:16:31,162
my mouth tastes weird,
324
00:16:31,574 --> 00:16:34,748
it hurts to swallow,
and I've got a little double vision.
325
00:16:34,869 --> 00:16:36,246
Yeah.
326
00:16:36,537 --> 00:16:38,084
I'm feeling better, too.
327
00:16:46,797 --> 00:16:49,767
- Well, this party's a disaster.
- Don't blame the party!
328
00:16:49,842 --> 00:16:51,515
You know how many favors
I had to call in
329
00:16:51,594 --> 00:16:54,564
with my bounce house guy
to get Wonder Woman?
330
00:16:55,765 --> 00:16:57,767
Is that Wonder Woman?
331
00:16:59,352 --> 00:17:01,104
Technically,
it's a Chinese knockoff called
332
00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:03,315
Happy Strong Swimsuit Lady.
333
00:17:04,273 --> 00:17:06,776
Then I take it back, it's a great party.
334
00:17:07,318 --> 00:17:09,116
Well, you can sit here
and sulk if you want.
335
00:17:09,195 --> 00:17:11,197
I'm gonna go celebrate
Halley's first birthday.
336
00:17:11,447 --> 00:17:13,996
Which I planned with no help from you.
337
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:15,372
What are you doing?
338
00:17:15,451 --> 00:17:18,330
It's a bounce house!
I'm gonna go bounce in it!
339
00:17:19,830 --> 00:17:21,457
You're supposed to take your shoes off
340
00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:23,088
before you go in there!
341
00:17:25,670 --> 00:17:27,217
You know what?
342
00:17:27,338 --> 00:17:30,091
I'm stressed about
my daughter's birthday party.
343
00:17:30,174 --> 00:17:31,596
I don't need your attitude.
344
00:17:31,676 --> 00:17:32,928
Well, I worked really hard on this,
345
00:17:33,094 --> 00:17:35,062
and you haven't even said thank you.
346
00:17:35,137 --> 00:17:36,605
I'm sorry. Thank you.
347
00:17:36,764 --> 00:17:37,811
Thank you for blaming me
348
00:17:37,890 --> 00:17:39,688
for everything
that's wrong in your life!
349
00:17:39,767 --> 00:17:42,395
Thank you for walking out
on our friendship!
350
00:17:42,562 --> 00:17:43,905
You are welcome!
351
00:17:43,980 --> 00:17:46,403
And thank you for mocking me
for all of these years!
352
00:17:46,482 --> 00:17:48,780
Thank you for making it so easy!
353
00:17:50,695 --> 00:17:52,493
Why are you being such a jerk?
354
00:17:52,572 --> 00:17:56,543
Because you're my best friend
and you hurt my feelings!
355
00:17:56,617 --> 00:17:59,461
Well, you're my best friend
and you hurt my feelings!
356
00:18:01,706 --> 00:18:04,209
I can't believe you shoved me!
357
00:18:06,377 --> 00:18:08,050
Well, I can't believe you shoved me!
358
00:18:08,129 --> 00:18:09,722
But it was kind of fun, wasn't it?
359
00:18:09,922 --> 00:18:12,266
- It was! Do it again!
- Gladly!
360
00:18:14,260 --> 00:18:16,604
Okay, now at the same time!
361
00:18:18,306 --> 00:18:19,603
(BOTH LAUGHING) That was awesome!
362
00:18:19,682 --> 00:18:22,151
Yeah, okay, this time, knees, then feet.
363
00:18:22,226 --> 00:18:23,728
One, two, three.
364
00:18:26,647 --> 00:18:28,695
Again! Again!
365
00:18:33,070 --> 00:18:34,071
Hello.
366
00:18:34,155 --> 00:18:35,281
- Hi.
- You made it.
367
00:18:35,364 --> 00:18:36,456
How you two feeling?
368
00:18:36,532 --> 00:18:37,784
Oh, a little better.
369
00:18:37,867 --> 00:18:38,914
Those books should have been called
370
00:18:38,993 --> 00:18:41,337
Little Outhouse on the Prairie.
371
00:18:42,288 --> 00:18:44,711
BERNADETTE: Halley's awake
and ready for her party!
372
00:18:44,790 --> 00:18:45,882
Be right up!
373
00:18:45,958 --> 00:18:48,177
- I want to see the birthday girl.
- I'd love to see her.
374
00:18:48,294 --> 00:18:51,719
BERNADETTE: Walk slow, it takes a while
to put this bra back on!
375
00:18:54,675 --> 00:18:56,348
You know,
376
00:18:56,719 --> 00:18:58,562
it's still your birthday.
377
00:18:59,138 --> 00:19:00,355
It is.
378
00:19:00,431 --> 00:19:04,356
And we are both feeling better.
379
00:19:06,187 --> 00:19:07,655
We are.
380
00:19:08,230 --> 00:19:09,903
And there's no one in that bounce house.
381
00:19:10,066 --> 00:19:11,443
No.
382
00:19:11,901 --> 00:19:13,369
Great.
383
00:19:13,903 --> 00:19:15,621
Let's go jump for a bit,
384
00:19:15,696 --> 00:19:17,949
and then find a bedroom
to have coitus in.
385
00:19:25,498 --> 00:19:27,500
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
386
00:19:45,768 --> 00:19:46,815
English - SDH
28903
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