Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,127 --> 00:00:04,753
Your argument is lacking
in all scientific merit.
2
00:00:04,921 --> 00:00:06,505
And it is well-established...
3
00:00:06,673 --> 00:00:10,009
...Superman cleans his uniform
by flying into Earth's yellow sun...
4
00:00:10,176 --> 00:00:12,261
...which incinerates
any contaminant matter...
5
00:00:12,429 --> 00:00:16,765
...and leaves the invulnerable Kryptonian
fabric unharmed and daisy fresh.
6
00:00:18,059 --> 00:00:20,060
What if he gets something
Kryptonian on it?
7
00:00:20,228 --> 00:00:24,148
- Like what?
- I don't know. Kryptonian mustard.
8
00:00:24,315 --> 00:00:27,401
I think we can assume all Kryptonian
condiments were destroyed...
9
00:00:27,569 --> 00:00:30,154
...when the planet Krypton exploded.
10
00:00:30,321 --> 00:00:32,281
Or it turned into mustard Kryptonite.
11
00:00:32,449 --> 00:00:36,618
The only way to destroy a rogue
Kryptonian hot dog threatening Earth.
12
00:00:37,537 --> 00:00:40,122
Raj, please, let's stay serious here.
13
00:00:40,290 --> 00:00:43,834
Superman's body is Kryptonian,
therefore his sweat is Kryptonian.
14
00:00:44,002 --> 00:00:46,503
Yeah, what about Kryptonian pit stains?
15
00:00:46,963 --> 00:00:48,756
Superman doesn't sweat on Earth.
16
00:00:48,923 --> 00:00:51,633
Okay. He's invited for dinner
in the bottle city of Kandor.
17
00:00:51,801 --> 00:00:55,220
He miniaturizes himself, enters the city,
where he loses his super-powers.
18
00:00:55,388 --> 00:00:58,474
Before dinner, his host says,
"Who's up for Kryptonian tetherball?"
19
00:00:58,641 --> 00:01:01,852
Superman works up a sweat, comes back
to Earth, his uniform now stained...
20
00:01:02,020 --> 00:01:04,605
...with indestructible
Kryptonian perspiration.
21
00:01:07,692 --> 00:01:09,318
Booyah.
22
00:01:11,362 --> 00:01:14,448
Superman would have taken his uniform
to a Kandorian dry-cleaner...
23
00:01:14,616 --> 00:01:16,742
...before he left the bottle.
24
00:01:17,410 --> 00:01:21,663
Kandorian dry-cl...? I give up. You can't have
a rational argument with this man.
25
00:01:23,333 --> 00:01:26,543
Hey, isn't that the guy who won
the MacArthur genius grant last year?
26
00:01:27,337 --> 00:01:29,505
No, not all at once.
27
00:01:29,672 --> 00:01:32,800
- Then how?
- Leonard.
28
00:01:34,135 --> 00:01:35,969
Now Raj.
29
00:01:37,472 --> 00:01:39,389
Now Sheldon.
30
00:01:41,059 --> 00:01:43,894
- I didn't get a good look. Can I go again?
- No.
31
00:01:44,062 --> 00:01:47,064
- That's David Underhill. So what?
- So what?
32
00:01:47,232 --> 00:01:50,776
His observation of high-energy positrons
has provided the first evidence...
33
00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:53,028
...for the existence
of galactic dark matter.
34
00:01:53,196 --> 00:01:56,615
I have two words for you.
The first is "big," the other's "whoop."
35
00:01:57,075 --> 00:02:00,994
It is a big whoop. Made almost all the work
you've done completely useless.
36
00:02:01,162 --> 00:02:03,038
- Did not.
- Did too.
37
00:02:03,206 --> 00:02:05,582
Okay, maybe some of it. But...
38
00:02:05,750 --> 00:02:08,085
The guy was just in the right place
at the right time...
39
00:02:08,253 --> 00:02:10,963
...with the right paradigm-shifting
reinterpretation of the universe.
40
00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:13,006
He got lucky.
41
00:02:13,424 --> 00:02:14,591
In more ways than one.
42
00:02:15,218 --> 00:02:17,511
He's a very handsome man.
43
00:02:18,096 --> 00:02:20,430
Doesn't do anything for me.
If I was gonna go that way...
44
00:02:20,598 --> 00:02:23,600
...I'm more of a Zac Efron kind of guy.
45
00:02:25,562 --> 00:02:27,980
Oh, yeah.
Like you have a shot with Zac Efron.
46
00:02:29,482 --> 00:02:32,109
Excuse me. Are you Leonard Hofstadter?
47
00:02:32,277 --> 00:02:34,611
- Uh, yeah.
- I'm David Underhill.
48
00:02:34,779 --> 00:02:37,948
Uh, yeah. Heh, heh.
49
00:02:38,116 --> 00:02:41,326
Dr. Gablehauser said
if I wanted to set up something in the lab...
50
00:02:41,494 --> 00:02:43,453
...that you'd be able to give me a hand?
51
00:02:43,621 --> 00:02:46,039
- You wanna work with me?
- If you have time, yeah.
52
00:02:46,207 --> 00:02:50,502
Wow. Yeah, sure. Yeah, no problem.
53
00:02:50,670 --> 00:02:54,965
Um, here's my home number,
here's my cell, here's my office...
54
00:02:55,133 --> 00:02:58,135
...here's my parents' number
up in New Jersey.
55
00:02:58,303 --> 00:02:59,845
- They know how to reach me.
DAVID: Okay.
56
00:03:00,013 --> 00:03:03,015
Congratulations on the MacArthur grant,
by the way. Big fan.
57
00:03:03,183 --> 00:03:05,142
Thanks. I'll call you.
58
00:03:05,310 --> 00:03:06,768
Okay.
59
00:03:06,936 --> 00:03:08,228
Bye-bye.
60
00:03:13,109 --> 00:03:16,111
What are you looking at?
You've never seen a hypocrite before?
61
00:03:41,512 --> 00:03:43,722
Trailing badly, Wolowitz needs a strike...
62
00:03:43,890 --> 00:03:46,183
...if he has hopes of catching up
with Sheldon...
63
00:03:46,351 --> 00:03:51,396
...who is dominating in the ninth frame
with a career-best 68.
64
00:03:59,572 --> 00:04:01,365
LEONARD:
Hey, guys.
65
00:04:02,492 --> 00:04:04,243
That doesn't count. Do-over, do-over.
66
00:04:04,410 --> 00:04:07,329
There are no do-overs in Wii bowling.
67
00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:11,667
There are always do-overs
when my people play sports.
68
00:04:12,543 --> 00:04:15,003
Where were you that's more important
than Wii bowling night?
69
00:04:15,171 --> 00:04:17,005
- Actually, I...
- It's a rhetorical question.
70
00:04:17,173 --> 00:04:19,841
There is nothing more important
than Wii bowling night.
71
00:04:20,009 --> 00:04:22,928
Come on, it's just a video game
and we suck at it.
72
00:04:23,096 --> 00:04:24,137
[SHELDON GASPS]
73
00:04:24,305 --> 00:04:27,349
Nice motivational speech
from the team captain.
74
00:04:28,434 --> 00:04:31,019
- Where were you?
- I was working with Dave Underhill.
75
00:04:31,187 --> 00:04:35,274
Ooh, "Dave."
Sounds like Leonard's got a new BFF.
76
00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:39,653
Actually, he is pretty cool.
I mean, not only is he a brilliant scientist...
77
00:04:39,821 --> 00:04:42,281
...but it turns out
he's a black-diamond skier...
78
00:04:42,448 --> 00:04:45,534
...he collects vintage motorcycles,
he plays in a rock band.
79
00:04:45,994 --> 00:04:49,413
- So? We're in a rock band.
- No.
80
00:04:49,914 --> 00:04:52,874
We play "Rock Band" on our Xbox.
81
00:04:53,459 --> 00:04:56,962
Nice motivational speech
from our lead guitarist.
82
00:04:57,130 --> 00:04:58,171
He's funny too.
83
00:04:58,339 --> 00:05:03,010
He does this hysterical impersonation
of Stephen Hawking having phone sex.
84
00:05:03,886 --> 00:05:06,388
[AS STEPHEN HAWKING]
What are you wearing?
85
00:05:07,724 --> 00:05:09,891
[IN NORMAL VOICE]
That's not... He does it better.
86
00:05:10,059 --> 00:05:14,479
He said he was gonna take me to the gym
so I'm gonna go practice my sit-ups.
87
00:05:15,565 --> 00:05:18,567
Wow. Humongous man crush, dude.
88
00:05:18,901 --> 00:05:20,944
Yup, it's officially a bromance.
89
00:05:21,112 --> 00:05:22,279
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
90
00:05:23,114 --> 00:05:25,574
Hey, Sheldon. Are you and Leonard
putting up a Christmas tree?
91
00:05:25,742 --> 00:05:29,786
No, because we don't celebrate
the ancient pagan festival of Saturnalia.
92
00:05:31,247 --> 00:05:32,414
Saturnalia?
93
00:05:32,582 --> 00:05:37,627
Gather around, kids. It's time for Sheldon's
beloved Christmas special.
94
00:05:39,255 --> 00:05:43,050
In the pre-Christian era, as the winter
solstice approached and the plants died...
95
00:05:43,217 --> 00:05:47,095
...pagans brought evergreen boughs in their
homes as an act of sympathetic magic...
96
00:05:47,263 --> 00:05:50,474
...intended to guard the life essences
of the plants until spring.
97
00:05:50,641 --> 00:05:53,101
This custom was appropriated
by northern Europeans...
98
00:05:53,269 --> 00:05:56,271
...and, eventually, it becomes
the so-called Christmas tree.
99
00:05:57,982 --> 00:06:01,985
And that, Charlie Brown,
is what boredom is all about.
100
00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:07,491
Okay, well, thank you for that.
I got you and Leonard silly neighbor gifts...
101
00:06:07,658 --> 00:06:10,494
- ...so I'll just put them under my tree.
- Wait.
102
00:06:10,661 --> 00:06:12,829
- You bought me a present?
- Uh-huh.
103
00:06:12,997 --> 00:06:14,956
Why would you do such a thing?
104
00:06:15,917 --> 00:06:18,460
- I don't know. Because it's Christmas?
- Oh, Penny.
105
00:06:18,628 --> 00:06:20,212
I know you think you're being generous...
106
00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:22,964
...but the foundation of gift-giving
is reciprocity.
107
00:06:23,132 --> 00:06:27,177
You haven't given me a gift,
you've given me an obligation.
108
00:06:28,554 --> 00:06:31,306
Don't feel bad, Penny.
It's a classic rookie mistake.
109
00:06:31,474 --> 00:06:34,643
My first Hanukkah with Sheldon,
he yelled at me for eight nights.
110
00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:39,147
It's okay.
You don't have to get me anything.
111
00:06:39,315 --> 00:06:43,318
Of course I do. The essence of the custom
is that I now have to go and purchase...
112
00:06:43,486 --> 00:06:47,197
...a gift of commensurate value and
representing the same level of friendship...
113
00:06:47,365 --> 00:06:50,367
...as that represented by the gift
you've given me.
114
00:06:50,535 --> 00:06:53,703
It's no wonder suicide rates skyrocket
this time of year.
115
00:06:54,622 --> 00:06:56,706
Okay, forget it,
I'm not giving you a present.
116
00:06:56,874 --> 00:06:59,835
No, it's too late. I see it.
That elf sticker says "To Sheldon."
117
00:07:01,587 --> 00:07:03,839
The die has been cast.
The moving finger has writ.
118
00:07:04,006 --> 00:07:05,882
Hannibal has crossed the Alps.
119
00:07:07,844 --> 00:07:11,221
I know. It's funny
when it's not happening to us.
120
00:07:13,057 --> 00:07:17,519
- Sheldon, I am very, very sorry.
- No, no. I brought this on myself...
121
00:07:17,687 --> 00:07:21,106
...by being such an endearing
and important part of your life.
122
00:07:22,483 --> 00:07:24,693
I'm going to need a ride to the mall.
123
00:07:25,736 --> 00:07:28,029
It's happening to us.
124
00:07:29,532 --> 00:07:32,492
LEONARD:
Ow. Ow.
125
00:07:32,660 --> 00:07:35,203
DAVID: Are you gonna make it?
- Yeah, I guess.
126
00:07:37,039 --> 00:07:40,000
Thanks for letting me try out
your motorcycle.
127
00:07:40,668 --> 00:07:44,379
- No problem.
- I had no idea it was so heavy.
128
00:07:45,131 --> 00:07:47,632
Thing just fell right over on me,
didn't it? Heh.
129
00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:50,552
Yeah. Lucky for you it wasn't moving.
130
00:07:51,387 --> 00:07:53,555
- Oh, hey, Leonard. Ooh, are you okay?
- Oh, yeah.
131
00:07:53,723 --> 00:07:56,057
It's just a little motorcycle accident.
132
00:07:56,225 --> 00:07:57,893
Oh, my God. How fast were you going?
133
00:07:58,060 --> 00:08:00,854
I don't know. It was all such a blur.
134
00:08:01,022 --> 00:08:02,063
[CHUCKLES]
135
00:08:02,231 --> 00:08:04,065
Good one.
He couldn't even get it started.
136
00:08:05,067 --> 00:08:08,737
- Hi. Dave.
- Hi. Penny. So it's your motorcycle?
137
00:08:08,905 --> 00:08:11,490
- Uh-huh.
- Oh. Is it okay?
138
00:08:12,492 --> 00:08:15,410
Lucky for the bike it landed on my leg.
139
00:08:16,245 --> 00:08:18,914
- Mind giving me a hand with Speed Racer?
- Oh, yeah. Sure.
140
00:08:19,081 --> 00:08:21,416
So, um, Dave,
how do you know Leonard?
141
00:08:21,584 --> 00:08:25,086
- I'm a physicist.
- Ha, ha. No, you're not.
142
00:08:26,255 --> 00:08:27,964
DAVID:
Why is that so surprising?
143
00:08:28,132 --> 00:08:33,428
PENNY: Well, it's just that the physicists
I know are indoors-y and pale.
144
00:08:34,263 --> 00:08:35,347
LEONARD:
I'm not indoors-y.
145
00:08:35,515 --> 00:08:39,518
I just wear the appropriate sun block
because I don't take melanoma lightly.
146
00:08:39,685 --> 00:08:42,312
So are you and Leonard working
on an experiment together?
147
00:08:42,480 --> 00:08:45,023
- Yeah, we are.
- We're examining the radiation levels...
148
00:08:45,191 --> 00:08:47,984
...of photomultiplier tubes
for a new dark-matter detector.
149
00:08:48,152 --> 00:08:50,779
Sweetie, sweetie, Dave was talking.
150
00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:53,156
You know, I love science.
151
00:08:53,324 --> 00:08:55,534
- Since when?
- Since always.
152
00:08:55,993 --> 00:09:00,622
Call me a geek, but I am just nuts
for the whole subatomic-particle thing.
153
00:09:00,790 --> 00:09:03,375
DAVID: The last thing
I would ever call you is a geek.
154
00:09:03,543 --> 00:09:07,170
Oh, well, that's what I am.
Queen of the nerds.
155
00:09:07,338 --> 00:09:10,215
Hey, if you'd like, I could show you
the lab we're working in.
156
00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:12,884
We've got some cool toys, you know.
Lasers and stuff.
157
00:09:13,052 --> 00:09:16,429
You know, I have always wanted to see
a big science lab.
158
00:09:16,597 --> 00:09:19,140
- Since when?
- Since always.
159
00:09:19,308 --> 00:09:20,809
Leonard, are you okay here?
160
00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:23,061
- Yeah, I guess.
- How about we go see it now?
161
00:09:23,229 --> 00:09:26,398
Afterwards, we take the bike up the coast,
we grab a bite to eat?
162
00:09:26,566 --> 00:09:30,443
Um, yeah. Yeah, that sounds great.
Let me just get my jacket.
163
00:09:32,655 --> 00:09:33,822
[DOOR CLOSES]
164
00:09:33,990 --> 00:09:36,074
Boy, she'll do, huh?
165
00:09:37,285 --> 00:09:39,703
Yeah, if you like that type.
166
00:09:39,870 --> 00:09:41,830
So you and her...?
167
00:09:41,998 --> 00:09:44,165
- No, just neighbors.
- Really?
168
00:09:44,584 --> 00:09:48,253
I don't know how you live next door to that
without doing something about it.
169
00:09:49,463 --> 00:09:51,214
Actually...
170
00:09:51,507 --> 00:09:53,883
...science is my lady.
171
00:09:55,761 --> 00:09:57,721
- Okay. Let's go.
- All right.
172
00:09:57,888 --> 00:10:00,056
- See you tomorrow, Leonard.
- See you.
173
00:10:00,224 --> 00:10:02,684
Bye, Penny. Have fun.
174
00:10:07,315 --> 00:10:09,024
SHELDON:
Yes?
175
00:10:16,073 --> 00:10:18,617
Did you forget your key?
176
00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:32,797
Well, I don't see anything in here
a woman would want.
177
00:10:33,674 --> 00:10:38,053
You're kidding.
You've got lotions and bath oils and soaps.
178
00:10:38,220 --> 00:10:41,389
That's the estrogen hat trick.
179
00:10:42,558 --> 00:10:48,396
What it is is a cacophonous assault of
eucalyptus, bayberry, cinnamon and vanilla.
180
00:10:48,731 --> 00:10:51,983
It's as if my head were trapped
in the pajamas of a sultan.
181
00:10:52,777 --> 00:10:57,030
Sheldon, if you don't like this stuff,
let's just go next door and build her a bear.
182
00:10:57,698 --> 00:11:00,992
I told you before, bears are terrifying.
183
00:11:01,869 --> 00:11:04,704
Come on, bath stuff. It's perfect.
184
00:11:04,872 --> 00:11:07,749
You got a scented candle,
a cleansing buff.
185
00:11:07,917 --> 00:11:10,418
Spearmint-and-green-tea-scented bath oil
promotes relaxation.
186
00:11:10,586 --> 00:11:12,087
That presupposes Penny is tense.
187
00:11:12,254 --> 00:11:15,256
She knows you. She's tense.
We all are. Buy a basket.
188
00:11:15,424 --> 00:11:18,259
- Excuse me, we're ready.
- No, we're not.
189
00:11:18,427 --> 00:11:22,013
Let's say for a moment that
I accept the bath-item-gift hypothesis.
190
00:11:22,181 --> 00:11:26,267
I now lay the following conundrum
at your feet. Which size?
191
00:11:26,435 --> 00:11:28,478
This one. Let's go.
192
00:11:28,646 --> 00:11:31,773
- You put no thought into that.
- I'm sorry. Ah...
193
00:11:32,108 --> 00:11:34,359
This one. Let's go.
194
00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:37,445
I have insufficient data to proceed.
195
00:11:37,613 --> 00:11:40,031
- Excuse me, miss?
- Yes?
196
00:11:40,533 --> 00:11:42,534
If I were to give you this gift basket...
197
00:11:42,702 --> 00:11:45,036
...based on that action alone
and no other data...
198
00:11:45,204 --> 00:11:50,125
...infer and describe the hypothetical
relationship that exists between us.
199
00:11:51,544 --> 00:11:52,961
Excuse me?
200
00:11:53,963 --> 00:11:55,505
Here.
201
00:11:55,756 --> 00:12:00,135
Now are we friends? Colleagues? Lovers?
202
00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:02,220
Are you my grandmother?
203
00:12:04,140 --> 00:12:06,141
I don't understand
what you're talking about...
204
00:12:06,308 --> 00:12:08,935
...and you're making me
a little uncomfortable.
205
00:12:09,186 --> 00:12:12,063
See? Sounds just like you and Penny.
We'll take it.
206
00:12:17,570 --> 00:12:18,862
Hey, Leonard. Come, join us.
207
00:12:19,029 --> 00:12:22,490
Oh, hey, Dave. And Penny.
What a surprise.
208
00:12:22,658 --> 00:12:25,201
Hey, Leonard. Dave was showing me
around the university.
209
00:12:25,369 --> 00:12:27,328
You know, this place is unbelievable.
210
00:12:27,496 --> 00:12:30,957
Yeah, I know. I've been offering
to show you around for a year and a half.
211
00:12:31,500 --> 00:12:33,001
You always said you had yoga.
212
00:12:33,669 --> 00:12:36,588
- I never said that.
- Maybe I heard you wrong.
213
00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:39,174
A lot of words sound like "yoga."
214
00:12:40,009 --> 00:12:43,678
This is an amazing woman, Leonard.
She has a curious and agile mind.
215
00:12:43,846 --> 00:12:46,765
Not to mention being curious and agile
in other respects.
216
00:12:47,183 --> 00:12:48,767
Shut up.
217
00:12:48,934 --> 00:12:51,269
Yes, please, shut up.
218
00:12:52,646 --> 00:12:56,357
So, um, Dave, don't you think
you and I should get back to the lab?
219
00:12:56,525 --> 00:12:59,861
You know, that dark matter
isn't gonna detect itself.
220
00:13:02,907 --> 00:13:06,868
I was thinking about taking the afternoon
off so I could experiment with Penny.
221
00:13:07,369 --> 00:13:09,704
- Really? We're gonna do an experiment?
DAVID: Uh-huh.
222
00:13:09,872 --> 00:13:14,209
We're gonna explore the effects of tequila
shots on a gorgeous 22-year-old woman.
223
00:13:14,376 --> 00:13:17,545
That's not an experiment.
You saw what happened last night.
224
00:13:19,256 --> 00:13:20,548
DAVID: You ready to go?
- Yeah.
225
00:13:20,716 --> 00:13:23,092
- Oh, can I drive the motorcycle?
- Yeah, why not?
226
00:13:23,260 --> 00:13:25,053
You can't do any worse than Leonard.
227
00:13:25,221 --> 00:13:27,931
- Oh, my God.
- No, that's good. That's funny.
228
00:13:30,559 --> 00:13:33,937
By the way, my leg is killing me.
Thanks for asking.
229
00:13:56,377 --> 00:14:00,922
Mm. Great news, Leonard.
I've solved my Penny gift dilemma.
230
00:14:01,090 --> 00:14:02,757
Yippee.
231
00:14:02,967 --> 00:14:06,219
You see, the danger was that
I might under-or over-reciprocate...
232
00:14:06,387 --> 00:14:08,304
...but I have devised a foolproof plan.
233
00:14:08,889 --> 00:14:14,185
I will open her gift to me first and then
excuse myself, feigning digestive distress.
234
00:14:14,353 --> 00:14:17,438
Then I'll look up the price
of her gift online...
235
00:14:17,606 --> 00:14:21,192
...choose the basket closest to that value,
give it to her...
236
00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:24,487
...and then I'll return the others
for a full refund.
237
00:14:25,781 --> 00:14:27,448
Brilliant.
238
00:14:27,616 --> 00:14:29,576
It is, isn't it?
239
00:14:30,119 --> 00:14:31,995
Is it okay if I hide them in your room?
240
00:14:32,162 --> 00:14:35,164
The smell makes me nauseated.
241
00:14:35,791 --> 00:14:38,877
- Do whatever you want.
- Thank you. That's very gracious.
242
00:14:41,005 --> 00:14:42,672
Gentlemen?
243
00:14:46,010 --> 00:14:48,511
HOWARD: Why couldn't you have
just done what Leonard did...
244
00:14:48,679 --> 00:14:51,180
...and get Penny a new boyfriend?
245
00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:58,313
My leg is killing me. Thanks for asking.
246
00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:07,405
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
247
00:15:08,198 --> 00:15:11,367
Okay, I have just one question for you.
248
00:15:11,535 --> 00:15:13,995
While I am perfectly happy
with the way things are...
249
00:15:14,163 --> 00:15:17,874
...you said that you didn't wanna go out
with me because I was too smart for you.
250
00:15:18,042 --> 00:15:22,211
Well, news flash, lady:
David Underhill is 10 times smarter than me.
251
00:15:22,379 --> 00:15:26,841
You'd have to drive a railroad spike into
his brain for me to beat him at checkers.
252
00:15:27,551 --> 00:15:32,513
Next to him, I'm one of those sign-language
gorillas who knows how to ask for grapes.
253
00:15:33,223 --> 00:15:35,850
So my question is...
254
00:15:36,018 --> 00:15:38,144
...what's up with that?
255
00:15:40,022 --> 00:15:42,023
Why are you yelling at me?
256
00:15:42,441 --> 00:15:46,361
Sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Never mind, we're cool.
257
00:15:46,904 --> 00:15:49,530
Dave is not smarter than you.
He's an idiot.
258
00:15:50,658 --> 00:15:53,034
Really? Why would you say that?
259
00:15:53,202 --> 00:15:57,080
Because a smart guy takes the nude photos
of his wife off his cell phone...
260
00:15:57,247 --> 00:16:00,833
...before he tries to take nude photos
of his girlfriend.
261
00:16:02,461 --> 00:16:04,128
He tried to take nude photos of you?
262
00:16:05,089 --> 00:16:08,049
That's what you took from that?
263
00:16:10,010 --> 00:16:12,053
The guy is married.
264
00:16:12,221 --> 00:16:13,888
Oh, yeah.
265
00:16:14,056 --> 00:16:17,141
I'm sor... Oh, that's terrible.
266
00:16:17,309 --> 00:16:21,396
And you. If you are so okay with the way
things are between us, why are you jealous?
267
00:16:21,689 --> 00:16:22,730
Well, that...
268
00:16:24,274 --> 00:16:28,069
The important thing is
he's married and that's terrible.
269
00:16:30,072 --> 00:16:32,573
Nice save, genius.
270
00:16:33,283 --> 00:16:36,202
- Eggnog?
- Lactose.
271
00:16:37,413 --> 00:16:41,249
It's just rum. It stopped being eggnog,
like, a half an hour ago.
272
00:16:46,213 --> 00:16:47,922
Smooth.
273
00:16:49,258 --> 00:16:51,592
Smoother than you.
274
00:16:52,428 --> 00:16:55,430
Come on, it's Christmas.
Just give me this one.
275
00:16:56,682 --> 00:16:58,307
Okay.
276
00:16:58,767 --> 00:17:00,518
Merry Christmas.
277
00:17:05,524 --> 00:17:08,776
By the way, my leg is killing me.
Thanks for asking.
278
00:17:14,074 --> 00:17:15,742
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
279
00:17:17,411 --> 00:17:18,995
- Merry Christmas.
- Merry Christmas.
280
00:17:19,163 --> 00:17:22,290
- How's your leg?
- Very good. Thanks for asking. Come on in.
281
00:17:23,375 --> 00:17:27,211
Oh, good, Penny,
you're here to exchange gifts.
282
00:17:30,632 --> 00:17:34,635
You'll be pleased to know
I'm prepared for whatever you have to offer.
283
00:17:35,304 --> 00:17:36,721
Okay. Here.
284
00:17:40,476 --> 00:17:44,145
I should note,
I'm having some digestive distress...
285
00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:50,401
...so if I excuse myself abruptly,
don't be alarmed.
286
00:17:57,701 --> 00:18:01,245
Oh, a napkin.
287
00:18:02,790 --> 00:18:04,165
Turn it over.
288
00:18:10,881 --> 00:18:15,510
"To Sheldon. Live long and prosper.
289
00:18:16,261 --> 00:18:18,888
Leonard Nimoy."
290
00:18:21,517 --> 00:18:25,978
Yeah, he came into the restaurant. Sorry the
napkin's dirty. He wiped his mouth with it.
291
00:18:30,692 --> 00:18:35,196
I possess the DNA of Leonard Nimoy?
292
00:18:38,075 --> 00:18:39,700
Well...
293
00:18:42,955 --> 00:18:45,748
Yeah, yeah, I guess.
But look, he signed it.
294
00:18:45,916 --> 00:18:48,709
Do you realize what this means?
295
00:18:50,754 --> 00:18:55,967
All I need is a healthy ovum
and I can grow my own Leonard Nimoy.
296
00:19:00,055 --> 00:19:04,058
Okay, all I'm giving you is the napkin,
Sheldon.
297
00:19:06,395 --> 00:19:08,229
Be right back.
298
00:19:10,732 --> 00:19:12,775
- Here, open it.
- Oh.
299
00:19:15,237 --> 00:19:16,571
Oh.
300
00:19:16,738 --> 00:19:20,074
A gift certificate for motorcycle lessons.
301
00:19:22,244 --> 00:19:24,495
- Very thoughtful.
- Yeah, and I checked.
302
00:19:24,663 --> 00:19:29,125
Not letting the bike fall on you
while standing still is lesson one.
303
00:19:29,877 --> 00:19:32,378
Oh, then I think you'll appreciate
what I got you.
304
00:19:32,546 --> 00:19:34,255
Okay.
305
00:19:37,759 --> 00:19:42,263
"101 Totally Cool Science Experiments
for Kids."
306
00:19:46,393 --> 00:19:49,270
You know,
because you're so into science.
307
00:19:59,948 --> 00:20:02,450
Sheldon, what did you do?
308
00:20:03,076 --> 00:20:04,619
I know.
309
00:20:05,787 --> 00:20:07,455
It's not enough, is it?
310
00:20:10,250 --> 00:20:11,626
Here.
311
00:20:24,514 --> 00:20:27,850
Leonard, look. Sheldon's hugging me.
312
00:20:29,186 --> 00:20:31,646
It's a Saturnalia miracle.
313
00:21:00,133 --> 00:21:02,134
[English - US - SDH]
26241
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof