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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:43,086 --> 00:00:46,046 [dramatic symphonic music] 4 00:00:46,089 --> 00:00:54,010 ♪ 5 00:01:47,846 --> 00:01:50,762 [whooshing] 6 00:01:55,637 --> 00:01:58,814 - [discordant] ♪ 200 MOTELS 7 00:01:58,857 --> 00:02:01,730 - [German accent] 200 MOTELS! 8 00:02:01,773 --> 00:02:04,124 LIFE ON THE ROAD! 9 00:02:04,167 --> 00:02:06,517 [cymbal crashes] 10 00:02:06,561 --> 00:02:09,520 [atonal music] 11 00:02:09,564 --> 00:02:17,485 ♪ 12 00:02:25,406 --> 00:02:27,799 LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! 13 00:02:27,843 --> 00:02:30,106 AND HERE HE IS... - WHO? 14 00:02:30,150 --> 00:02:31,934 - LARRY THE DWARF! 15 00:02:31,977 --> 00:02:37,026 [cheers and applause] 16 00:02:37,069 --> 00:02:39,246 LARRY LIKES TO DRESS UP FUNNY. 17 00:02:39,289 --> 00:02:42,118 TONIGHT, HE'S DRESSED UP LIKE FRANK ZAPPA. 18 00:02:42,162 --> 00:02:47,210 LET'S ASK HIM, "WHAT'S THE DEAL?" 19 00:02:47,254 --> 00:02:50,257 HI, LARRY. IT'S GOOD TO HAVE YOU BACK ON OUR PANEL. 20 00:02:50,300 --> 00:02:53,129 - HI, DAVE, IT'S REALLY GREAT TO BE BACK ON YOUR PANEL. 21 00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:55,218 - I'M SURE THE PEOPLE AT HOME WILL BE INTERESTED TO KNOW 22 00:02:55,262 --> 00:02:57,655 WHY SUCH A LARGE DWARF AS YOU 23 00:02:57,699 --> 00:02:59,657 IS ALL DRESSED UP LIKE FRANK ZAPPA. 24 00:02:59,701 --> 00:03:03,139 TELL US, LARRY, EH... WHAT'S THE DEAL? 25 00:03:03,183 --> 00:03:04,880 - HE MADE ME DO IT, DAVE. 26 00:03:04,923 --> 00:03:06,186 HE'S SUCH A CREEP. 27 00:03:06,229 --> 00:03:08,275 HE'S MAKING ME HOLD THIS ALADDIN. 28 00:03:08,318 --> 00:03:11,234 - AND WHY IS HE MAKING YOU DO THAT, LARRY? 29 00:03:11,278 --> 00:03:14,324 - HE WANTS ME TO FUCK THE GIRL WITH THE HARP. 30 00:03:14,368 --> 00:03:17,284 [laughter] 31 00:03:17,327 --> 00:03:22,071 - HE WANTS YOU TO FUCK THE GIRL...WITH THE HARP? 32 00:03:22,114 --> 00:03:25,030 - NO, NO! WITH THE MAGIC LAMP. 33 00:03:25,074 --> 00:03:27,903 HE WANTS ME TO STUFF IT UP HER AND RUB IT. 34 00:03:27,946 --> 00:03:30,819 [chuckles lecherously] 35 00:03:30,862 --> 00:03:33,561 HO HO HO, HA HA! 36 00:03:33,604 --> 00:03:36,085 AH HA HA HA, HO HO! 37 00:03:38,261 --> 00:03:39,523 [bubbling] 38 00:03:39,567 --> 00:03:41,221 - LET'S ASK OUR STUDIO AUDIENCE. 39 00:03:41,264 --> 00:03:43,397 IF YOU'D JUST BEEN LOWERED DOWN HERE ON TV 40 00:03:43,440 --> 00:03:46,487 BY A WIRE CONNECTED TO A BROWN LEATHER HARNESS, 41 00:03:46,530 --> 00:03:49,446 FORCED BY A CRAZY PERSON TO INSERT A MYSTERIOUS, 42 00:03:49,490 --> 00:03:51,361 IMPORTED LAMP INTO THE REPRODUCTIVE-- 43 00:03:51,405 --> 00:03:55,931 REP-REP-REP--INTO-INTO THE REP-REP-REPRODUCTIVE ORIFICE 44 00:03:55,974 --> 00:04:00,457 OF A LADY HARPIST, AND YOU WERE A DWARF... 45 00:04:00,501 --> 00:04:02,503 WOULD YOU DO IT? 46 00:04:02,546 --> 00:04:04,418 - YES! 47 00:04:04,461 --> 00:04:09,423 [all cheering] 48 00:04:09,466 --> 00:04:12,600 - LET'S SPIN THE BIG WHEEL, LARRY! 49 00:04:12,643 --> 00:04:15,951 GO AHEAD, GIVE IT A WHIRL! 50 00:04:15,994 --> 00:04:18,693 male announcer: WHAT OUR STUDIO AUDIENCE DOESN'T KNOW 51 00:04:18,736 --> 00:04:20,564 IS THAT THE REASON LARRY THE DWARF 52 00:04:20,608 --> 00:04:23,088 IS DOING ALL THIS STUFF IS BECAUSE IT'S ALL 53 00:04:23,132 --> 00:04:25,830 PART OF THE SCORE TO 200 MOTELS. 54 00:04:25,874 --> 00:04:29,486 EVERY WORD, EVERY ACTION-- THE LAMP, 55 00:04:29,530 --> 00:04:31,488 THE REPRODUCTIVE ORIFICE-- 56 00:04:31,532 --> 00:04:34,099 IT'S ALL IN THE SCORE, SO HE HAS TO DO IT. 57 00:04:34,143 --> 00:04:36,711 THIS WHOLE EVENT IS A FANTASY THAT OCCURRED 58 00:04:36,754 --> 00:04:38,887 TOURING ON THE ROAD. 59 00:04:38,930 --> 00:04:42,282 TOURING CAN MAKE YOU CRAZY, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. 60 00:04:42,325 --> 00:04:48,288 THAT IS PRECISELY WHAT 200 MOTELSIS ALL ABOUT. 61 00:04:48,331 --> 00:04:51,334 - SING! [rock music] 62 00:04:51,378 --> 00:04:53,249 OW! 63 00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:56,034 LOOK OUT! 64 00:04:56,078 --> 00:04:57,819 AAH! 65 00:04:57,862 --> 00:05:00,952 LOOK OUT! 66 00:05:00,996 --> 00:05:02,606 AAH! 67 00:05:02,650 --> 00:05:04,695 LOOK OUT! 68 00:05:04,739 --> 00:05:07,437 AAH! 69 00:05:07,481 --> 00:05:09,787 both: ♪ HOW LONG? 70 00:05:09,831 --> 00:05:12,268 ♪ HOW LONG? 71 00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:16,620 ♪ TILL THE MYSTERY ROACH BE ARRIVIN' SOON ♪ 72 00:05:16,664 --> 00:05:19,536 ♪ YA-OOO 73 00:05:19,580 --> 00:05:21,886 ♪ YA-OOO 74 00:05:21,930 --> 00:05:24,106 ♪ YA-OOO 75 00:05:24,149 --> 00:05:26,717 ♪ YA-OOO 76 00:05:26,761 --> 00:05:29,285 ♪ THE MYSTERY ROACH BE APPROACHIN' ♪ 77 00:05:29,329 --> 00:05:35,552 ♪ MYSTERY ROACH BE APPROACHIN' ME ♪ 78 00:05:35,596 --> 00:05:37,249 ♪ OOF! 79 00:05:40,340 --> 00:05:41,993 - ♪ OW! 80 00:05:44,996 --> 00:05:47,347 both: ♪ HOW LONG? 81 00:05:47,390 --> 00:05:49,871 ♪ HOW LONG? 82 00:05:49,914 --> 00:05:54,702 ♪ TILL THE MYSTERY ROACH BE GONE ♪ 83 00:05:54,745 --> 00:06:00,795 ♪ YA-OOO-OOO-OO-OOO 84 00:06:00,838 --> 00:06:02,013 ♪ HEY 85 00:06:02,057 --> 00:06:04,059 ♪ 86 00:06:04,102 --> 00:06:10,370 ♪ YA-OOO-OOO-OO-OOO 87 00:06:10,413 --> 00:06:13,285 ♪ 88 00:06:13,329 --> 00:06:15,375 ♪ THE MYSTERY ROACH BE APPROACHIN' ♪ 89 00:06:15,418 --> 00:06:20,205 ♪ THE MYSTERY ROACH BE APPROACHIN' ME ♪ 90 00:06:20,249 --> 00:06:22,643 ♪ LA LA LA LA LA LA LA, OOF 91 00:06:22,686 --> 00:06:24,601 ♪ MYSTERY ROACH BE APPROACHIN' 92 00:06:24,645 --> 00:06:29,258 ♪ MYSTERY ROACH BE APPROACHIN' ME ♪ 93 00:06:29,301 --> 00:06:31,434 ♪ LA LA LA LA LA LA LA, OOF ♪ 94 00:06:31,478 --> 00:06:33,915 ♪ MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY ROACH ♪ 95 00:06:33,958 --> 00:06:36,221 ♪ MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY ROACH ♪ 96 00:06:36,265 --> 00:06:38,615 ♪ MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY ROACH ♪ 97 00:06:38,659 --> 00:06:40,704 ♪ MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY ROACH ♪ 98 00:06:40,748 --> 00:06:43,141 ♪ MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY ROACH ♪ 99 00:06:43,185 --> 00:06:45,405 ♪ MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY ROACH ♪ 100 00:06:45,448 --> 00:06:47,668 ♪ MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY ROACH ♪ 101 00:06:47,711 --> 00:06:50,105 ♪ MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY MYSTERY ROACH ♪ 102 00:06:50,148 --> 00:06:55,502 [overlapping shouts and grunts] 103 00:07:05,816 --> 00:07:07,383 - ROOM SERVICE? 104 00:07:07,427 --> 00:07:11,256 [overlapping shouts] 105 00:07:11,300 --> 00:07:12,910 - OHH...OHH... 106 00:07:12,954 --> 00:07:14,651 MYSTERY ROACH? 107 00:07:14,695 --> 00:07:17,219 WHAT ARE WE SINGING ABOUT? 108 00:07:17,262 --> 00:07:20,962 WE MUST BE... FLIPPING OUT! 109 00:07:21,005 --> 00:07:23,138 - [German accent] SPECIAL DELIVERY FOR MR. VOLMAN! 110 00:07:23,181 --> 00:07:24,879 MR. VOLMAN? 111 00:07:24,922 --> 00:07:26,402 [electronic beeping] 112 00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:27,621 ARE YOU VOLMAN? 113 00:07:27,664 --> 00:07:28,883 - [sniffs] 114 00:07:28,926 --> 00:07:30,885 DO YOU SMELL SOMETHIN' WEIRD? 115 00:07:30,928 --> 00:07:32,234 [sniffs] 116 00:07:32,277 --> 00:07:34,279 IT'S A DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER 117 00:07:34,323 --> 00:07:36,630 FROM A FAMOUS AMERICAN BURGER CHAIN, 118 00:07:36,673 --> 00:07:38,196 WITH A SYMBOL IN THE PARKING LOT 119 00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:40,938 THAT'S YELLOW PLASTIC AND GOES LIKE THIS: 120 00:07:40,982 --> 00:07:42,418 - RANCE MUHAMMITZ... 121 00:07:42,462 --> 00:07:44,942 RANCE MUHAMMITZ... RANCE... 122 00:07:44,986 --> 00:07:46,901 RANCE MUHAMMITZ... 123 00:07:46,944 --> 00:07:48,163 RANCE... 124 00:07:48,206 --> 00:07:49,207 RANCE... 125 00:07:49,251 --> 00:07:50,426 - MUHAMMITZ... 126 00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:51,427 MUHAMMITZ... 127 00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:52,472 MUHAMMITZ... 128 00:07:52,515 --> 00:07:54,517 - IN A STEAMING BRIEFCASE! 129 00:07:54,561 --> 00:07:57,477 [electronic beeping] 130 00:07:57,520 --> 00:07:59,348 - YOU'RE VOLMAN! 131 00:07:59,391 --> 00:08:01,959 - YEAH. NO. NO. 132 00:08:02,003 --> 00:08:05,093 HE'S VOLMAN. WHO ARE YOU? 133 00:08:05,136 --> 00:08:09,532 - YOU MUST CALL ME... RANCE MUHAMMITZ. 134 00:08:09,576 --> 00:08:12,448 - RANCE MUHAMMITZ? 135 00:08:12,492 --> 00:08:13,928 STUPIDEST NAME I EVER HEARD OF. 136 00:08:13,971 --> 00:08:15,669 - YEAH, BUT YOU MUST REMEMBER 137 00:08:15,712 --> 00:08:19,455 THAT WITHIN THE CONCEPTUAL FRAMEWORK OF THIS FILMIC EVENT, 138 00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:21,588 NOTHING REALLY MATTERS. 139 00:08:21,631 --> 00:08:23,111 IT IS ENTIRELY POSSIBLE 140 00:08:23,154 --> 00:08:26,984 FOR SEVERAL SUBJECTIVE REALITIES TO COEXIST. 141 00:08:27,028 --> 00:08:30,684 IT IS POSSIBLE THAT ALL THINGS ARE A DECEPTION OF THE SENSES. 142 00:08:30,727 --> 00:08:32,729 - RIGHT ON, RANCE. 143 00:08:32,773 --> 00:08:35,993 THE FUNCTIONING OF OUR SENSES HAS BEEN SPIRITUALLY IMPAIRED 144 00:08:36,037 --> 00:08:37,734 AND CHEMICALLY CORRUPTED BY THE FAKE, 145 00:08:37,778 --> 00:08:39,475 ARTIFICIAL FOOD COLORING. 146 00:08:39,519 --> 00:08:41,521 - BY THE WAY... 147 00:08:41,564 --> 00:08:43,479 MR. VOLMAN... 148 00:08:43,523 --> 00:08:46,482 [creak] I HAVE... 149 00:08:46,526 --> 00:08:47,701 [creak] 150 00:08:47,744 --> 00:08:49,529 YOUR CHEESEBURGER! 151 00:08:49,572 --> 00:08:51,792 - WE MUST EVOLVE. - YEAH. 152 00:08:51,835 --> 00:08:53,968 - WE MUST PROGRESS. - PROGRESS. 153 00:08:54,011 --> 00:08:55,578 - THERE MUST BE GROWTH! 154 00:08:55,622 --> 00:08:58,712 - YEAH...MACROBIOTIC FOODS AND TIE-DYE SHIRTS! 155 00:08:58,755 --> 00:09:01,715 - HEY, YOU GONNA EAT THAT CHEESEBURGER, MARK? 156 00:09:01,758 --> 00:09:04,718 [munching, burps] 157 00:09:04,761 --> 00:09:06,502 - FUCKING GUY WILL EAT ANYTHING. 158 00:09:06,546 --> 00:09:08,373 - THIS IS REGISTERED DELIVERY. 159 00:09:08,417 --> 00:09:10,245 YOU WILL HAVE TO SIGN FOR IT. 160 00:09:10,288 --> 00:09:12,247 - SURE MAN, I'LL SIGN. WHERE'S A PENCIL? 161 00:09:12,290 --> 00:09:15,250 - I DON'T WISH TO ALARM YOU, MY SON... 162 00:09:15,293 --> 00:09:19,036 BUT THE SIGNATURE WILL HAVE TO BE... 163 00:09:19,080 --> 00:09:20,777 IN BLOOD. 164 00:09:20,821 --> 00:09:23,301 - LISTEN MAN, I JUST WANNA KNOW TWO THINGS. 165 00:09:23,345 --> 00:09:25,434 IS THERE ANY BEER IN THIS FAKE NIGHTCLUB, 166 00:09:25,477 --> 00:09:26,522 AND WHEN DO WE GET PAID? 167 00:09:26,566 --> 00:09:28,263 - GENTLEMEN, GENTLEMEN. 168 00:09:28,306 --> 00:09:30,221 IN A MOMENT OR TWO, YOU'LL BE ABLE TO GET YOUR HANDS 169 00:09:30,265 --> 00:09:32,528 ON ALL THE IMAGINARY BEER THAT YOU WANT. 170 00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:34,443 FOR THE MOMENT, I WOULD LIKE TO EXPLAIN 171 00:09:34,486 --> 00:09:37,315 SOME OF THE THINGS THAT YOU'LL ALL BE DOING IN THIS MOVIE. 172 00:09:37,359 --> 00:09:38,882 - I'VE BEEN WONDERING ABOUT THAT. 173 00:09:38,926 --> 00:09:40,318 - FOR SHERWOOD... 174 00:09:40,362 --> 00:09:43,321 WE HAVE A VACUUM CLEANER SCHEDULED. 175 00:09:43,365 --> 00:09:45,323 - A VACUUM CLEANER? 176 00:09:45,367 --> 00:09:47,804 - AND A POTENTIAL EPILEPTIC SEIZURE 177 00:09:47,848 --> 00:09:50,328 DURING A PRODUCTION NUMBER LATER ON. 178 00:09:50,372 --> 00:09:52,940 - A VACUUM CLEANER! 179 00:09:52,983 --> 00:09:54,594 OHH, THANK YOU. 180 00:09:54,637 --> 00:09:58,815 - I THOUGHT THE TWO OF YOU WOULD LIKE TO GET ACQUAINTED. 181 00:09:58,859 --> 00:10:02,906 IT SAYS HERE THAT YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE IN LOVE. 182 00:10:02,950 --> 00:10:06,040 - THIS ABNORMAL RELATIONSHIP WILL BE GREAT 183 00:10:06,083 --> 00:10:08,216 FOR THE BIG STORY I'M GOING TO WRITE! 184 00:10:08,259 --> 00:10:10,784 - LISTEN, MAN, I JUST WANNA KNOW ONE THING: 185 00:10:10,827 --> 00:10:12,263 WHEN DO WE GET PAID? 186 00:10:12,307 --> 00:10:13,787 - NO, LOOK, LOOK, LOOK, LOOK-- 187 00:10:13,830 --> 00:10:16,441 DON'T YOU EVEN CARE WHAT YOU DO? 188 00:10:16,485 --> 00:10:18,792 - SO LONG AS I GET SOME BEER AND I GET PAID, 189 00:10:18,835 --> 00:10:20,184 YOU CAN MAKE ME DO ANYTHING. 190 00:10:20,228 --> 00:10:21,795 I'M PROFESSIONAL! 191 00:10:21,838 --> 00:10:24,580 - YOU SHOULD BE CAREFUL TALKIN' ABOUT THAT STUFF. 192 00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:25,755 - WHY? DOES HE LISTEN? 193 00:10:25,799 --> 00:10:27,583 - HE ALWAYS LISTENS. 194 00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:31,369 HE ALWAYS WATCHES AND LISTENS TO ALL THE GUYS IN THE BAND. 195 00:10:31,413 --> 00:10:34,590 I'VE BEEN IN THE BAND FOR YEARS, 196 00:10:34,634 --> 00:10:37,375 [echoing] AND I KNOW. 197 00:10:37,419 --> 00:10:39,508 HE ALWAYS LISTENS. 198 00:10:39,551 --> 00:10:42,380 - THAT'S HOW HE GETS ALL HIS MATERIAL. 199 00:10:42,424 --> 00:10:45,296 IT ISN'T SUPPOSED TO BE NATURAL, 200 00:10:45,340 --> 00:10:47,603 FRIENDLY, 201 00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:49,605 GOOD-NATURED, 202 00:10:49,649 --> 00:10:50,693 HUMOROUS. 203 00:10:50,737 --> 00:10:52,390 [laughing] 204 00:10:52,434 --> 00:10:54,566 [laughter and rumbling] 205 00:10:54,610 --> 00:10:56,830 all: YEAH, WELL, FINE! 206 00:10:56,873 --> 00:10:58,614 - AND THEN HE RIPS US OFF 207 00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:01,617 AND HE SNEAKS OFF INTO A SECRET ROOM SOMEPLACE 208 00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:03,140 AND BOILS IT IN AMMONIA 209 00:11:03,184 --> 00:11:04,707 AND HE GETS IT PERVERTED, 210 00:11:04,751 --> 00:11:06,056 AND THEN HE BRINGS IT BACK TO US 211 00:11:06,100 --> 00:11:07,754 AT REHEARSALS AND MAKES US PLAY IT! 212 00:11:07,797 --> 00:11:10,713 - HEY, MAN, WHAT'S THAT OVER THERE? 213 00:11:10,757 --> 00:11:14,804 - IT'S HIM. YOU CAN SEE HIM. HE'S WATCHING. 214 00:11:14,848 --> 00:11:16,197 - DO YOU THINK HE HEARD US? 215 00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:18,242 - I'VE BEEN IN THE BAND FOR YEARS. 216 00:11:18,286 --> 00:11:20,418 YOU CAN BET THAT HE HEARD EVERYTHING. 217 00:11:20,462 --> 00:11:22,682 - YEAH, LET'S GO OVER AND PRETEND TO BE NICE TO HIM. 218 00:11:22,725 --> 00:11:23,857 - YEAH, LET'S GO OVER AND PRETEND 219 00:11:23,900 --> 00:11:25,467 WE DON'T KNOW HE'S WATCHING. 220 00:11:25,510 --> 00:11:27,991 - YEAH, AND RIPPIN' OFF ALL OUR GOOD MATERIAL. 221 00:11:33,170 --> 00:11:34,171 HI, MAN! 222 00:11:34,215 --> 00:11:35,433 - HI, FRANK! 223 00:11:35,477 --> 00:11:37,784 - HI, MAN! - HI, FRANK! 224 00:11:37,827 --> 00:11:39,655 - HI, MAN! - HEY, FRANK! 225 00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:41,962 - HEY, THAT'S A GREAT NEW SONG YOU WROTE. 226 00:11:42,005 --> 00:11:43,920 YOU KNOW, THE ONE ABOUT THE PENIS AND EVERYTHING? 227 00:11:43,964 --> 00:11:46,880 I WAS LAUGHIN' A LOT THE WHOLE TIME I WAS LEARNIN' IT! 228 00:11:46,923 --> 00:11:48,490 - YEAH, WE WERE ALL LAUGHIN', FRANK! 229 00:11:48,533 --> 00:11:49,883 [all laugh] 230 00:11:49,926 --> 00:11:51,754 all: YEAH? WELL, FINE! 231 00:11:51,798 --> 00:11:53,756 - YEAH, IT TOOK A LITTLE WHILE TO GET INTO IT, MAN, 232 00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:55,671 BUT ONCE WE GOT THE DRIFT, PHEW! 233 00:11:55,715 --> 00:11:57,717 - YEAH, LOTS OF GREAT PARTS YOU GOT IN THERE 234 00:11:57,760 --> 00:11:59,327 FOR THE CHORUS-- YOU KNOW WHEN THEY GO... 235 00:11:59,370 --> 00:12:02,069 all: ♪ RAN-TAN-RAN-TOON RAN-TAN-TAN ♪ 236 00:12:02,112 --> 00:12:03,897 - AND I STEAL THE ROOM AND EVERYTHING, YOU KNOW. 237 00:12:03,940 --> 00:12:05,159 I DON'T EVEN MIND YOU RIPPIN' IT OFF FROM ME, 238 00:12:05,202 --> 00:12:06,856 JUST AS LONG AS I GET PAID. 239 00:12:06,900 --> 00:12:08,466 - OH, AND I DON'T EVEN MIND THE PART WHERE HE SAYS, 240 00:12:08,510 --> 00:12:11,165 "WHAT CAN I SAY ABOUT THIS FABULOUS ELIXIR?" 241 00:12:11,208 --> 00:12:13,471 SO LONG AS ME AND HOWARD AND JEFF SIMMONS, 242 00:12:13,515 --> 00:12:15,473 WHO LEFT THE GROUP JUST BEFORE THE MOVIE STARTED, 243 00:12:15,517 --> 00:12:17,911 GET CREDIT FOR SPECIAL MATERIAL. 244 00:12:17,954 --> 00:12:20,914 - I'M DEEPLY OFFENDED BY YOUR LACK OF ARTISTIC SENSE. 245 00:12:20,957 --> 00:12:23,438 - LOOK HERE, MUHAMMITZ, OR WHATEVER THE FUCK THEY CALL YA, 246 00:12:23,481 --> 00:12:24,874 I DON'T EVEN GIVE A SHIT, MAN! 247 00:12:24,918 --> 00:12:26,658 I GOT FIVE FUCKIN' KIDS AT HOME AND-- 248 00:12:26,702 --> 00:12:28,486 COULD YOU LEND ME A COUPLE OF BUCKS 249 00:12:28,530 --> 00:12:29,705 UNTIL THE END OF THE WEEK? 250 00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:31,707 WHO ARE YOU, ANYWAY? 251 00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:33,491 - OH, SHE WRITES FOR THE IMAGINARY 252 00:12:33,535 --> 00:12:35,450 ROCK AND ROLL NEWSPAPER IN SAN FRANCISCO. 253 00:12:35,493 --> 00:12:36,451 - SAN FRANCISCO? 254 00:12:36,494 --> 00:12:39,454 [haunting orchestral music] 255 00:12:39,497 --> 00:12:47,418 ♪ 256 00:13:23,933 --> 00:13:25,674 [door rattling] 257 00:13:25,717 --> 00:13:27,763 all: MAN! 258 00:13:27,807 --> 00:13:30,984 - OH! UH... 259 00:13:31,027 --> 00:13:32,768 HE'S MAKING ME LEAVE HERE NOW. 260 00:13:32,812 --> 00:13:34,378 I'LL SEE YOU LATER WHEN WE PLAY. 261 00:13:34,422 --> 00:13:35,858 - WHAT? 262 00:13:35,902 --> 00:13:37,468 - I DON'T EXPECT YOU TO UNDERSTAND THAT, 263 00:13:37,512 --> 00:13:39,644 BECAUSE, UH, WE HAVEN'T FORMED THE GROUP YET. 264 00:13:39,688 --> 00:13:41,995 - AH, MARK WILL PLAY THE BASS. 265 00:13:42,038 --> 00:13:44,998 - ♪ BA-DOOM-DOOM-DOOM-DOOM 266 00:13:45,041 --> 00:13:47,304 - HOWIE WILL SING AND PLAY SAX. 267 00:13:47,348 --> 00:13:48,566 - ♪ DWEE-DAT-DWEE-DAT 268 00:13:48,610 --> 00:13:49,829 ♪ DWEET-DAT-DWEE-DAT 269 00:13:49,872 --> 00:13:51,613 - I'LL PLAY THE GUITAR... 270 00:13:51,656 --> 00:13:53,484 ♪ WOOP-DOO-DOO-DOO 271 00:13:53,528 --> 00:13:55,835 AND THE DWARF HERE WILL PLAY DRUMS! 272 00:13:55,878 --> 00:13:59,316 [all scatting] 273 00:13:59,360 --> 00:14:01,579 - WAIT A MINUTE, WAIT A MINUTE, WAIT A MINUTE, WAIT A MINUTE. 274 00:14:01,623 --> 00:14:03,059 WAIT A MINUTE. 275 00:14:03,103 --> 00:14:05,322 THIS GUY ISN'T EVEN A DWARF! 276 00:14:05,366 --> 00:14:07,542 - THAT'S ONE OF THE REASONS THE GROUP WILL BE SO COMMERCIAL! 277 00:14:07,585 --> 00:14:09,587 [bassoon blows] 278 00:14:09,631 --> 00:14:12,547 - AH. WHAT ABOUT THE OTHER GUYS? 279 00:14:12,590 --> 00:14:14,810 - AH, THEY'RE ALREADY FORMING GROUPS ALL OVER THE PLACE. 280 00:14:14,854 --> 00:14:16,159 WHY WAIT TILL THE END OF THE MOVIE? 281 00:14:16,203 --> 00:14:18,074 WE COULD HAVE A HIT SINGLE RIGHT NOW! 282 00:14:18,118 --> 00:14:19,336 - HE'S RIGHT, HE'S RIGHT! WE DON'T NEED AYNSLEY. 283 00:14:19,380 --> 00:14:20,816 - NO. - WE DON'T NEED IAN. 284 00:14:20,860 --> 00:14:22,035 - NO. - WE DON'T NEED GEORGE! 285 00:14:22,078 --> 00:14:23,558 - NO! - WE DON'T NEED ANYBODY! 286 00:14:23,601 --> 00:14:24,559 - NO! - ARGH! 287 00:14:24,602 --> 00:14:26,082 - HE NEEDS US, REMEMBER. 288 00:14:26,126 --> 00:14:28,084 WE DON'T NEED HIM! - YEAH! 289 00:14:28,128 --> 00:14:29,607 ALL THOSE OTHER GUYS ARE TOO OLD FOR ROCK. 290 00:14:29,651 --> 00:14:31,218 THEY'RE OUT OF IT! 291 00:14:31,261 --> 00:14:32,828 WE COULD HAVE A TIGHT LITTLE HEAVY LITTLE BAND 292 00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:34,612 WITH THIS DWARF HERE. 293 00:14:34,656 --> 00:14:37,354 YOU KNOW THAT HE--HE USED TO PLAY DRUMS FOR LEON RUSSELL. 294 00:14:37,398 --> 00:14:38,878 all: OHH... 295 00:14:38,921 --> 00:14:41,619 - LISTEN, YOU'RE RIGHT. ZAPPA'S 30. 296 00:14:41,663 --> 00:14:43,839 - YEAH, MAN. 30 YEARS OLD... 297 00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:46,320 - OH, HE'S OUT OF IT, MAN! 298 00:14:46,363 --> 00:14:48,235 HE'S TOO OLD. HE SHOULD RETIRE. 299 00:14:48,278 --> 00:14:50,628 - YEAH, REALLY. YOU CAN'T TRUST OLD PEOPLE. 300 00:14:50,672 --> 00:14:51,847 YOU KNOW, WE COULD TAKE UP A COLLECTION 301 00:14:51,891 --> 00:14:53,849 AND BUY HIM A WATCH. 302 00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:56,852 [eerie opera music] 303 00:14:56,896 --> 00:14:59,376 ♪ 304 00:14:59,420 --> 00:15:02,379 - ♪ I DON'T KNOW TOO MUCH ABOUT THIS STUFF ♪ 305 00:15:02,423 --> 00:15:06,644 ♪ I'VE BEEN A LITTLE BUSY 306 00:15:06,688 --> 00:15:09,299 ♪ THIS WON'T TAKE LONG 307 00:15:09,343 --> 00:15:13,869 ♪ JUST A FEW QUESTIONS 308 00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:16,611 ♪ THIS WON'T TAKE LONG 309 00:15:16,654 --> 00:15:20,397 ♪ JUST A FEW QUESTIONS 310 00:15:20,441 --> 00:15:26,099 ♪ 311 00:15:26,142 --> 00:15:30,712 ♪ THIS WON'T TAKE LONG 312 00:15:30,755 --> 00:15:33,193 ♪ JUST A FEW QUESTIONS 313 00:15:33,236 --> 00:15:35,978 ♪ JUST A FEW QUESTIONS 314 00:15:36,022 --> 00:15:43,943 ♪ 315 00:15:52,299 --> 00:15:54,692 ♪ THIS... 316 00:15:54,736 --> 00:15:56,956 ♪ WON'T... 317 00:15:56,999 --> 00:15:58,696 ♪ TAKE... 318 00:15:58,740 --> 00:16:01,438 ♪ LONG... 319 00:16:01,482 --> 00:16:03,179 ♪ 320 00:16:03,223 --> 00:16:05,921 ♪ THIS... 321 00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:08,402 ♪ WON'T... 322 00:16:08,445 --> 00:16:10,404 ♪ TAKE... 323 00:16:10,447 --> 00:16:13,407 ♪ LONG... 324 00:16:13,450 --> 00:16:15,409 ♪ 325 00:16:15,452 --> 00:16:17,933 ♪ THIS... 326 00:16:17,977 --> 00:16:20,936 ♪ WON'T... 327 00:16:20,980 --> 00:16:22,720 ♪ TAKE... 328 00:16:22,764 --> 00:16:25,158 ♪ LONG... 329 00:16:25,201 --> 00:16:27,725 ♪ 330 00:16:27,769 --> 00:16:29,727 ♪ THIS... 331 00:16:29,771 --> 00:16:32,382 ♪ WON'T... 332 00:16:32,426 --> 00:16:34,297 ♪ TAKE... 333 00:16:34,341 --> 00:16:35,690 ♪ LONG... 334 00:16:35,733 --> 00:16:39,650 [woman screeching] 335 00:16:39,694 --> 00:16:44,699 [birds tweeting] 336 00:16:44,742 --> 00:16:47,136 - I HEAR BIRDS! 337 00:16:47,180 --> 00:16:50,531 - WHAT'S HE SAYING? - YOU TOOK THE MYSTERY BURGER! 338 00:16:50,574 --> 00:16:52,881 YOU ARE IN FULL POSSESSION OF... 339 00:16:52,924 --> 00:16:54,752 THE BURGER! 340 00:16:57,755 --> 00:17:00,193 DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM? 341 00:17:00,236 --> 00:17:01,498 HMM? 342 00:17:01,542 --> 00:17:06,982 DO YOU KNOW WHO I REALLY AM? 343 00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:08,505 AGH. 344 00:17:08,549 --> 00:17:10,246 - REALLY, MAN! 345 00:17:10,290 --> 00:17:12,770 WHO...DO YOU THINK... 346 00:17:12,814 --> 00:17:13,989 YOU ARE? 347 00:17:14,033 --> 00:17:15,512 UHH! 348 00:17:15,556 --> 00:17:18,037 - YEAH, DO YOU WANT ME TO TELL YOU WHO 349 00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:20,256 I REALLY THINK YOU ARE? 350 00:17:20,300 --> 00:17:24,521 - OH, SOMEBODY TELL ME WHO IS THIS GUY? 351 00:17:24,565 --> 00:17:27,959 [music plays, voice not audible] 352 00:17:36,838 --> 00:17:39,754 both: CENTERVILLE. 353 00:17:42,844 --> 00:17:49,459 A REAL NICE PLACE TO RAISE YOUR KIDS UP. 354 00:17:55,596 --> 00:17:59,078 CENTERVILLE. 355 00:17:59,121 --> 00:18:02,037 IT'S REALLY NEAT! 356 00:18:07,086 --> 00:18:09,697 CHURCHES. 357 00:18:13,092 --> 00:18:16,182 CHURCHES. 358 00:18:23,624 --> 00:18:26,583 AND LIQUOR STORES. 359 00:18:26,627 --> 00:18:28,019 [giggling] 360 00:18:39,118 --> 00:18:41,337 OH, YEAH! IT'S... 361 00:18:41,381 --> 00:18:43,731 JUST LIKE GLENDALE. 362 00:19:20,420 --> 00:19:22,639 both: LOOK! 363 00:19:22,683 --> 00:19:24,989 OVER THERE. 364 00:19:33,476 --> 00:19:37,524 IT'S A RANCID BOUTIQUE. 365 00:19:37,567 --> 00:19:39,134 - [gasps] 366 00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:41,571 - JANET, DID YOU SEE THOSE GUYS WITH THE HAIR? 367 00:19:41,615 --> 00:19:43,138 IT'S THOSE GUYS FROM THE FAKE STAGE 368 00:19:43,182 --> 00:19:45,401 ACROSS THE STREET FROM OUR HOUSE. 369 00:19:45,445 --> 00:19:47,229 - OOH, I GET SO EXCITED WHEN SOMEBODY 370 00:19:47,273 --> 00:19:48,578 FROM A GROUP GETS NEAR ME. 371 00:19:48,622 --> 00:19:51,190 I JUST... OOH, I JUST... 372 00:19:51,233 --> 00:19:55,150 - DON'T YOU HAVE ANY TASTE? 373 00:19:55,194 --> 00:19:58,675 THAT ONE GUY'S GOT GRAY HAIR, AND THE OTHER ONE'S TOO FAT. 374 00:19:58,719 --> 00:20:00,068 - BUT THEY LOOK SO LONELY. 375 00:20:00,111 --> 00:20:02,592 - LONELY? GOOD EVENING, HONEY. 376 00:20:02,636 --> 00:20:03,985 THEY LOOK DESPERATE. 377 00:20:04,028 --> 00:20:05,987 DESPERATE POP STARS ARE SO DEPRESSING 378 00:20:06,030 --> 00:20:07,858 WHEN THEY'VE BEEN ON THE ROAD FOR SUCH A LONG TIME, 379 00:20:07,902 --> 00:20:09,947 AND THEY FINALLY GET SOME ACTION. 380 00:20:09,991 --> 00:20:12,167 - THEY DROOL ON YOU. 381 00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:14,648 - REALLY. ALL THAT STUFF THAT COMES OUT OF THEIR MOUTH 382 00:20:14,691 --> 00:20:16,084 WHEN THEY'RE ON TOP OF YOU. 383 00:20:16,127 --> 00:20:18,478 IT'S SO MOCHE.EWW. 384 00:20:18,521 --> 00:20:20,915 - EW, ON THE PILLOWS. 385 00:20:20,958 --> 00:20:22,699 - BUT I LIKE THE DRUMMER 386 00:20:22,743 --> 00:20:24,266 WITH THE RIVETS ON HIS CLOTHES. 387 00:20:24,310 --> 00:20:25,702 HE'S NOT BAD. 388 00:20:25,746 --> 00:20:26,964 - YEAH, I'VE SEEN HIM TOO. 389 00:20:27,008 --> 00:20:28,444 HE JUST SCREAMS "ENGLISHNESS" 390 00:20:28,488 --> 00:20:31,404 WITH THAT LITTLE HAIRCUT AND THE RINGS. 391 00:20:31,447 --> 00:20:32,448 - AND THE BINOCULARS. 392 00:20:32,492 --> 00:20:33,971 - BINOCULARS? 393 00:20:34,015 --> 00:20:36,365 - DIDN'T YOU NOTICE HIS BINOCULARS? 394 00:20:36,409 --> 00:20:38,498 - NO. HE'S GOT BINOCULARS? 395 00:20:38,541 --> 00:20:40,587 - HE WATCHES US THROUGH THEM. HE'S A PERVERT. 396 00:20:40,630 --> 00:20:43,459 - OH, I GET SO HOT JUST THINKING ABOUT PERVERSIONS. 397 00:20:43,503 --> 00:20:45,461 MAYBE WHEN WE GO DOWN TO THE FAKE NIGHTCLUB TONIGHT 398 00:20:45,505 --> 00:20:48,421 WE CAN MEET HIM AND FIND OUT IF HE REALLY IS PERVERTED. 399 00:20:48,464 --> 00:20:51,424 JUST TAKE MY WORD FOR IT. HE IS PERVERTED. 400 00:20:51,467 --> 00:20:54,165 - MMM... AND ENGLISH, TOO. 401 00:20:54,209 --> 00:20:55,558 - THEY'RE ALL THAT WAY. 402 00:20:55,602 --> 00:20:58,561 [rock music] 403 00:20:58,605 --> 00:21:08,441 ♪ 404 00:21:08,484 --> 00:21:11,966 - ♪ THIS TOWN 405 00:21:12,009 --> 00:21:15,361 ♪ THIS TOWN 406 00:21:15,404 --> 00:21:19,016 ♪ IS A SEALED 407 00:21:19,060 --> 00:21:23,064 ♪ TUNA SANDWICH 408 00:21:23,107 --> 00:21:28,025 ♪ SEALED 409 00:21:28,069 --> 00:21:36,556 ♪ TUNA SANDWICH 410 00:21:36,599 --> 00:21:39,863 ♪ WITH THE WRAPPER GLUED 411 00:21:39,907 --> 00:21:42,997 - ♪ WITH THE WRAPPER GLUED! 412 00:21:43,040 --> 00:21:47,131 - ♪ IT'S BY BALONEY ON THE RACK ♪ 413 00:21:47,175 --> 00:21:48,394 ♪ RANT-TANT-TANT 414 00:21:48,437 --> 00:21:49,786 ♪ TANT-TANT-TANT TANT-TANT-TANT ♪ 415 00:21:49,830 --> 00:21:56,358 ♪ IT GOES FOR 40 CENTS A WHACK ♪ 416 00:21:56,402 --> 00:21:58,142 [buzzing] 417 00:21:59,579 --> 00:22:04,627 ♪ IT'S JUST A RANCID 418 00:22:04,671 --> 00:22:10,024 ♪ LITTLE SNACK 419 00:22:12,548 --> 00:22:20,469 ♪ IN A PLASTIC BAG 420 00:22:20,513 --> 00:22:25,300 ♪ FROM A MATRON IN LA HABRA 421 00:22:25,344 --> 00:22:31,611 ♪ WITH A BLOWN-OUT CRACK 422 00:22:31,654 --> 00:22:35,571 ♪ WHO DIES TO SUCK THE FRINGE 423 00:22:35,615 --> 00:22:40,097 ♪ OFF OF JIMMY CARL BLACK 424 00:22:40,141 --> 00:22:41,360 [indistinct chatter] 425 00:22:41,403 --> 00:22:44,972 ♪ 426 00:22:45,015 --> 00:22:47,322 - ♪ MY NAME IS BURTRAM 427 00:22:47,366 --> 00:22:49,716 ♪ I AM A REDNECK 428 00:22:49,759 --> 00:22:52,022 ♪ ALL MY FRIENDS 429 00:22:52,066 --> 00:22:53,023 ♪ THEY CALL ME BURT 430 00:22:53,067 --> 00:22:54,068 - HI, BURT! 431 00:22:54,111 --> 00:22:56,113 - ♪ ALL MY FAMILY 432 00:22:56,157 --> 00:22:58,333 ♪ FROM DOWN IN TEXAS 433 00:22:58,377 --> 00:22:59,987 ♪ MAKE THEIR LIVIN' 434 00:23:00,030 --> 00:23:02,816 ♪ DIGGIN' DIRT 435 00:23:02,859 --> 00:23:07,124 ♪ COME OUT HERE TO CALIFORNY 436 00:23:07,168 --> 00:23:08,865 ♪ JUST TO FIND ME 437 00:23:08,909 --> 00:23:11,346 ♪ SOME PRETTY GIRLS 438 00:23:11,390 --> 00:23:13,435 ♪ ONES I SEEN 439 00:23:13,479 --> 00:23:15,959 ♪ GET ME SO HORNY 440 00:23:16,003 --> 00:23:19,876 ♪ RUBY LIPS AND TEETH LIKE PEARLS ♪ 441 00:23:19,920 --> 00:23:22,270 ♪ WANNA LOVE 'EM ALL 442 00:23:22,313 --> 00:23:24,490 ♪ WANNA LOVE 'EM DEARLY 443 00:23:24,533 --> 00:23:26,361 ♪ WANNA PRETTY GIRL 444 00:23:26,405 --> 00:23:28,581 ♪ I'LL EVEN PAY 445 00:23:28,624 --> 00:23:30,626 ♪ I'LL BUY 'EM FURS 446 00:23:30,670 --> 00:23:33,150 ♪ I'LL BUY 'EM JEWELRY 447 00:23:33,194 --> 00:23:35,152 ♪ I KNOW THEY LIKE ME 448 00:23:35,196 --> 00:23:37,590 ♪ HERE'S WHAT I SAY 449 00:23:37,633 --> 00:23:38,895 ♪ 450 00:23:38,939 --> 00:23:43,160 ♪ I'M LONESOME COWBOY BURT 451 00:23:43,204 --> 00:23:45,162 ♪ SPEAKIN' ATCHA 452 00:23:45,206 --> 00:23:49,253 ♪ COME SMELL MY FRINGE-Y SHIRT 453 00:23:49,297 --> 00:23:51,473 ♪ REEKIN' ATCHA 454 00:23:51,517 --> 00:23:54,302 ♪ MY COWBOY PANTS 455 00:23:54,345 --> 00:23:58,219 ♪ MY COWBOY DANCE 456 00:23:58,262 --> 00:24:00,526 ♪ MY BOLD ADVANCE 457 00:24:00,569 --> 00:24:04,486 ♪ ON THIS 458 00:24:04,530 --> 00:24:07,402 ♪ HERE 459 00:24:07,446 --> 00:24:08,403 ♪ WAITRESS 460 00:24:08,447 --> 00:24:11,188 ♪ YODEL-OH-OO-PEE-HEY 461 00:24:11,232 --> 00:24:14,627 ♪ YODEL-OH-OO-PEE-EE-EE 462 00:24:14,670 --> 00:24:18,935 - ♪ HE'S LONESOME COWBOY BURT 463 00:24:18,979 --> 00:24:25,420 ♪ DON'TCHA GET HIS FEELINGS HURT ♪ 464 00:24:25,464 --> 00:24:28,249 - ♪ COME ON IN THIS PLACE 465 00:24:28,292 --> 00:24:31,513 ♪ AND I'LL BUY YOU A TASTE 466 00:24:31,557 --> 00:24:34,211 ♪ YOU CAN SIT ON MY FACE 467 00:24:34,255 --> 00:24:38,172 ♪ WHERE'S MY WAITRESS? 468 00:24:38,215 --> 00:24:43,482 ♪ 469 00:24:43,525 --> 00:24:45,571 - ♪ BURTRAM 470 00:24:45,614 --> 00:24:47,573 ♪ BURTRAM REDNECK 471 00:24:47,616 --> 00:24:48,922 - ♪ YEAH, YEAH. 472 00:24:48,965 --> 00:24:50,793 - ♪ BURTRAM 473 00:24:50,837 --> 00:24:53,927 ♪ BURTRAM REDNECK 474 00:24:53,970 --> 00:24:56,756 - ♪ I'M AN AWFUL NICE GUY 475 00:24:56,799 --> 00:24:59,236 ♪ SWEAT ALL DAY IN THE SUN 476 00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:02,239 ♪ ROOFER BY TRADE, QUITE A BUNDLE I'VE MADE ♪ 477 00:25:02,283 --> 00:25:05,068 ♪ I'M A UNIONIZED ROOFIN' OLD SON-OF-A-GUN ♪ 478 00:25:05,112 --> 00:25:07,549 - ♪ HE'S A UNIONIZED ROOFIN' OLD SON-OF-A-GUN ♪ 479 00:25:07,593 --> 00:25:10,117 ♪ 480 00:25:10,160 --> 00:25:12,380 ♪ WHEN I GET OFF, I GET PLASTERED ♪ 481 00:25:12,423 --> 00:25:15,470 ♪ DRINK TILL I FALL ON THE FLOOR ♪ 482 00:25:15,514 --> 00:25:18,255 ♪ FIND ME SOME COMMUNIST BASTARD ♪ 483 00:25:18,299 --> 00:25:20,954 ♪ AND STOMP ON HIS FACE TILL HE DON'T MOVE NO MORE ♪ 484 00:25:20,997 --> 00:25:23,652 - ♪ HE STOMPS ON HIS FACE TILL HE DON'T MOVE NO MORE ♪ 485 00:25:23,696 --> 00:25:26,133 ♪ 486 00:25:26,176 --> 00:25:28,483 - ♪ I FUSS AND I CUSS AND I KEEP ON DRINKIN' ♪ 487 00:25:28,527 --> 00:25:31,486 ♪ TILL MY EYES PUFF UP AND TURN RED ♪ 488 00:25:31,530 --> 00:25:34,576 ♪ I DROOL ON MY SHIRT, I SEE IF HE'S HURT ♪ 489 00:25:34,620 --> 00:25:36,360 ♪ I KICK HIM AGAIN IN THE HEAD ♪ 490 00:25:36,404 --> 00:25:39,842 ♪ LET'S KICK HIM AGAIN IN THE HEAD, BOYS ♪ 491 00:25:39,886 --> 00:25:42,279 ♪ KICK HIM AGAIN IN THE HEAD, NOW ♪ 492 00:25:42,323 --> 00:25:44,586 ♪ KICK HIM AGAIN IN THE HEAD 493 00:25:44,630 --> 00:25:47,284 ♪ LONESOME COWBOY BURT 494 00:25:47,328 --> 00:25:48,721 ♪ SPEAKIN' ATCHA 495 00:25:48,764 --> 00:25:51,332 ♪ COME SMELL MY FRINGE-Y SHIRT 496 00:25:51,375 --> 00:25:52,768 ♪ REEKIN' ATCHA! 497 00:25:52,812 --> 00:25:54,596 ♪ MY COWBOY PANTS 498 00:25:54,640 --> 00:25:56,642 ♪ MY COWBOY DANCE 499 00:25:56,685 --> 00:25:58,600 ♪ MY BOLD ADVANCE 500 00:25:58,644 --> 00:26:00,689 ♪ ON THIS 501 00:26:00,733 --> 00:26:03,039 ♪ HERE WAITRESS 502 00:26:03,083 --> 00:26:05,302 ♪ YODEL-OH-OO-PEE-YEH 503 00:26:05,346 --> 00:26:06,608 ♪ YODEL-OH-OO-PEE! 504 00:26:06,652 --> 00:26:08,001 [laughs] 505 00:26:08,044 --> 00:26:13,223 - ♪ HE'S LONESOME COWBOY BURT 506 00:26:13,267 --> 00:26:19,708 ♪ DON'TCHA GET HIS FEELINGS HURT ♪ 507 00:26:19,752 --> 00:26:21,362 ♪ YEAH 508 00:26:21,405 --> 00:26:25,148 ♪ BUT COME ON IN THIS PLACE 509 00:26:25,192 --> 00:26:29,065 ♪ AND I'LL BUY YOU A TASTE 510 00:26:29,109 --> 00:26:32,634 ♪ AND YOU CAN SIT ON MY FACE 511 00:26:32,678 --> 00:26:36,333 ♪ WHERE'S MY WAITRESS? 512 00:26:36,377 --> 00:26:39,815 OPAL, YOU HOT LITTLE BITCH! 513 00:26:39,859 --> 00:26:42,078 [cymbal crashes] 514 00:26:42,122 --> 00:26:44,080 - YES, JIMMY CARL BLACK, 515 00:26:44,124 --> 00:26:46,082 INDIAN OF THE GROUP... 516 00:26:46,126 --> 00:26:47,997 WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU? 517 00:26:52,349 --> 00:26:54,221 [coughing] 518 00:27:03,926 --> 00:27:06,886 - MOHANNITZ! WHAT ARE YOU DOIN' HERE? 519 00:27:06,929 --> 00:27:08,452 - YOU JUST CALLED ME, DIDN'T YOU? 520 00:27:08,496 --> 00:27:10,890 - ALL I SAID WAS "OPAL, YOU HOT LITTLE BITCH." 521 00:27:10,933 --> 00:27:12,892 - I AM KNOWN BY MANY NAMES. 522 00:27:12,935 --> 00:27:14,502 - [chuckles] 523 00:27:14,545 --> 00:27:16,373 YOU GOT MANY FRIENDS WHO CALL YOU 524 00:27:16,417 --> 00:27:18,114 "OPAL THE HOT LITTLE BITCH"? 525 00:27:18,158 --> 00:27:20,029 - PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE MR. BLACK. 526 00:27:20,073 --> 00:27:22,205 LET US CUT THE SMALL TALK AND GET ON WITH YOUR BRIEFING. 527 00:27:22,249 --> 00:27:24,599 - FINE, YOU CAN BRIEF ME ALL YOU WANT, 528 00:27:24,643 --> 00:27:26,949 AS LONG AS YOU CAN TELL ME TWO THINGS... 529 00:27:26,993 --> 00:27:28,951 - I KNOW: WHEN DO WE GET PAID... 530 00:27:28,995 --> 00:27:32,085 - NO, I WANNA KNOW WHERE'S THAT WAITRESS. 531 00:27:32,128 --> 00:27:33,608 - MM-HMM, WAITRESS... 532 00:27:33,652 --> 00:27:35,392 - AND IF SHE COMES IN THIS PLACE, 533 00:27:35,436 --> 00:27:37,264 WILL SHE SIT ON MY FACE 534 00:27:37,307 --> 00:27:40,049 AND LOAN ME A COUPLE BUCKS UNTIL THE END OF THE WEEK? 535 00:27:40,093 --> 00:27:41,877 - COUPLE OF BUCKS... - HEH HEH! 536 00:27:41,921 --> 00:27:43,400 - END OF THE WEEK... 537 00:27:43,444 --> 00:27:45,141 WEEK ENDING-- THE WEEK ENDING... 538 00:27:45,185 --> 00:27:47,100 WHAT--WHAT THAT? WHAT'S THE DATE? 539 00:27:47,143 --> 00:27:49,624 - UH, TUESDAY WAS THE 5TH. 540 00:27:49,668 --> 00:27:51,887 UH, MONDAY WAS THE 3RD. 541 00:27:51,931 --> 00:27:53,454 MAKE THAT OUT FOR SUNDAY-- - DA-AH-AH! 542 00:27:53,497 --> 00:27:54,977 DON'T SAY SUNDAY. 543 00:27:55,021 --> 00:27:56,979 - WHAT'S WRONG WITH SUNDAY? - [whimpers] 544 00:27:57,023 --> 00:27:59,242 THE LORD'S DAY! [imitating gunfire] 545 00:27:59,286 --> 00:28:01,723 A DAY OF REST! [imitating gunfire] 546 00:28:01,767 --> 00:28:06,423 JUST MAKE THAT SUCKER OUT FOR THE 23RD OF MARCH, WOULD YA? 547 00:28:06,467 --> 00:28:07,860 [creak] 548 00:28:07,903 --> 00:28:09,600 - VERY WELL, MR. BLACK. 549 00:28:09,644 --> 00:28:11,211 OH, BY THE WAY. 550 00:28:11,254 --> 00:28:16,129 I HAVE HERE THE SPECIAL BEER I PROMISED YOU EARLIER. 551 00:28:16,172 --> 00:28:18,435 - OH, MAN, IT'S ABOUT TIME. I'VE BEEN WAITING. 552 00:28:18,479 --> 00:28:21,830 WOULD YOU CARE TO SIGN FOR IT? 553 00:28:25,094 --> 00:28:27,140 - THIS IS A PENCIL? 554 00:28:27,183 --> 00:28:29,969 - NO, MR. BLACK, IT IS A PIN. 555 00:28:30,012 --> 00:28:31,492 - A PIN? 556 00:28:31,535 --> 00:28:33,407 - WOULD YOU JAB YOURSELF IN THE FINGER WITH IT? 557 00:28:33,450 --> 00:28:35,714 - LISTEN, MOHANNITZ, I MAY BE PROFESSIONAL, 558 00:28:35,757 --> 00:28:39,152 BUT I'M NOT THAT PROFESSIONAL. I JUST WANT MY BEER. 559 00:28:39,195 --> 00:28:40,762 - SIGN FIRST! 560 00:28:40,806 --> 00:28:42,546 IN BLOOD. 561 00:28:42,590 --> 00:28:44,723 - FUCK YOU! WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, 562 00:28:44,766 --> 00:28:46,246 THE DEVIL OR SOMETHING? 563 00:28:46,289 --> 00:28:50,163 - I AM KNOWN BY MANY NAMES. 564 00:28:50,206 --> 00:28:51,904 - YOU PROBABLY GOT SOME MORE WEIRD NAMES FOR YOURSELF, 565 00:28:51,947 --> 00:28:53,688 BUT I'LL TELL YOU ONE THING: YOU AIN'T NEV-- 566 00:28:53,732 --> 00:28:55,516 DEFINITELY AIN'T NEVER GONNA BE CALLED, 567 00:28:55,559 --> 00:28:57,823 AND THAT'S THE DEVIL, BECAUSE YOU AIN'T THE DEVIL. 568 00:28:57,866 --> 00:28:59,215 - OH, I'M NOT? 569 00:28:59,259 --> 00:29:00,869 - YOU BET YOUR SWEET ASS YOU'RE NOT. 570 00:29:00,913 --> 00:29:02,653 THE FUCKIN' DEVIL'S GOT AN ENGLISH ACCENT. 571 00:29:02,697 --> 00:29:04,177 I SEEN HIM THREE WEEKS AGO ON TV. 572 00:29:04,220 --> 00:29:07,484 SO YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST TAKE THIS BIG NEEDLE HERE 573 00:29:07,528 --> 00:29:10,618 AND HANG IT IN YOUR ASS, AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED! 574 00:29:10,661 --> 00:29:12,359 [boom] 575 00:29:12,402 --> 00:29:15,057 [coughing] FUCKIN' GUY MUST HAVE BEEN A COMMUNIST! 576 00:29:15,101 --> 00:29:17,494 [bubbling] - HELLO THERE. 577 00:29:17,538 --> 00:29:20,236 WHEN YOU GO ON TOUR WITH A MUSICAL GROUP, 578 00:29:20,280 --> 00:29:23,979 IT'S POSSIBLE THAT ANY TOWN CAN SEEM LIKE THIS... 579 00:29:24,023 --> 00:29:26,982 WHETHER IT'S LARGE OR SMALL, OR BUSY, 580 00:29:27,026 --> 00:29:29,506 OR IF THERE'S NOTHING HAPPENING IN IT. 581 00:29:29,550 --> 00:29:31,726 THE REASON FOR THIS IS QUITE SIMPLE. 582 00:29:31,770 --> 00:29:35,512 A MUSICIAN, IF YOU CONSIDER THE NORMAL PATTERN 583 00:29:35,556 --> 00:29:37,210 OF MODERN CIVILIZED LIFE, 584 00:29:37,253 --> 00:29:39,734 IS ON THE OUTSIDE OF IT ALL. 585 00:29:39,778 --> 00:29:41,518 HE DOESN'T BUILD THINGS, 586 00:29:41,562 --> 00:29:43,172 HE DOESN'T WORK REGULAR HOURS 587 00:29:43,216 --> 00:29:45,261 LIKE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING CITIZEN, 588 00:29:45,305 --> 00:29:47,524 AND THE LIFE HE LEADS, IN MANY WAYS, 589 00:29:47,568 --> 00:29:50,745 SEEMS USELESS AND IRRELEVANT TO THOSE OF US 590 00:29:50,789 --> 00:29:53,530 WHO'D PREFER A QUIET EVENING IN FRONT OF THE TELEVISION 591 00:29:53,574 --> 00:29:56,272 AND A BOTTLE OF BEER. 592 00:29:56,316 --> 00:29:58,797 AMAZING AS IT MIGHT SEEM TO SOME OF US, 593 00:29:58,840 --> 00:30:01,016 MUSICIANS HAVE BASIC PHYSICAL NEEDS, 594 00:30:01,060 --> 00:30:03,279 JUST LIKE REAL PEOPLE. 595 00:30:03,323 --> 00:30:05,934 MANY OF THEM STUDY FOR YEARS, 596 00:30:05,978 --> 00:30:09,242 LEARNING TO PLAY THE VIOLIN, FOR INSTANCE, 597 00:30:09,285 --> 00:30:12,288 ONLY TO BE REWARDED WITH A HUMDRUM JOB 598 00:30:12,332 --> 00:30:15,988 IN THE FOURTH ROW OF A SYMPHONIC STRING SECTION. 599 00:30:16,031 --> 00:30:18,991 THAT'S WHY THE GOVERNMENT HAVE CONSTRUCTED, 600 00:30:19,034 --> 00:30:20,601 AT GREAT EXPENSE, 601 00:30:20,644 --> 00:30:24,300 THIS EXPERIMENTAL REORIENTATION FACILITY... 602 00:30:24,344 --> 00:30:28,304 [drum roll] 603 00:30:28,348 --> 00:30:32,047 TO FIND A WAY, PERHAPS, TO RETRAIN THESE USELESS 604 00:30:32,091 --> 00:30:36,051 OLD MUSICIANS WITH THEIR BROWN FIDDLES AND LITTLE HORNS, 605 00:30:36,095 --> 00:30:37,836 GIVE THEM A TRADE... 606 00:30:37,879 --> 00:30:40,795 A REASON TO EXIST IN THE MODERN WORLD, 607 00:30:40,839 --> 00:30:44,320 A CHANCE OF A HAPPIER, MORE PRODUCTIVE LIFE. 608 00:30:44,364 --> 00:30:46,845 SOME WILL ENTER THE MILITARY, 609 00:30:46,888 --> 00:30:49,282 SOME WILL LEARN SHORTHAND, 610 00:30:49,325 --> 00:30:52,807 AND SOME WILL DISAPPEAR IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT 611 00:30:52,851 --> 00:30:56,593 ON A SPECIAL TRAIN THEY'RE SENDING IN. 612 00:30:56,637 --> 00:30:58,334 IT'S THE ONLY WAY, REALLY, 613 00:30:58,378 --> 00:31:00,597 TO BRING ABOUT THE FINAL SOLUTION 614 00:31:00,641 --> 00:31:03,252 TO THE ORCHESTRA QUESTION. 615 00:31:03,296 --> 00:31:04,819 [indistinct chatter] 616 00:31:04,863 --> 00:31:07,343 I'M SURE THAT MANY OF US REALIZE 617 00:31:07,387 --> 00:31:09,824 THAT A POP GROUP CAN EARN A VAST AMOUNT OF MONEY 618 00:31:09,868 --> 00:31:13,610 COMPARED TO THESE OTHER KINDS OF MUSICIANS. 619 00:31:13,654 --> 00:31:16,135 THAT'S WHY THE SPECIAL GOVERNMENT AGENCIES 620 00:31:16,178 --> 00:31:20,443 FOR MASS RESPONSE PROGRAMMING AND PSYCHOLOGICAL STULTIFICATION 621 00:31:20,487 --> 00:31:24,360 PREFER TO TREAT THEM IN A MORE SUBTLE MANNER. 622 00:31:24,404 --> 00:31:26,885 THEY KNOW, JUST AS MANY OF YOU 623 00:31:26,928 --> 00:31:29,061 VIGILANT AND THOROUGHLY UPSTANDING CITIZENS 624 00:31:29,104 --> 00:31:31,063 HAVE DISCOVERED FOR YOURSELVES, 625 00:31:31,106 --> 00:31:34,631 THE POWER OF POP MUSIC TO CORRUPT AND PUTREFY 626 00:31:34,675 --> 00:31:37,591 THE MINDS OF WORLD YOUTH ARE VIRTUALLY LIMITLESS. 627 00:31:37,634 --> 00:31:40,724 [rock music] 628 00:31:40,768 --> 00:31:44,163 - ♪ OOH, THE WAY YOU LOVE ME, LADY ♪ 629 00:31:44,206 --> 00:31:48,907 ♪ I GET SO HARD NOW I COULD DIE ♪ 630 00:31:48,950 --> 00:31:52,040 ♪ 631 00:31:52,084 --> 00:31:55,478 ♪ OOH, THE WAY YOU LOVE ME, SUGAR ♪ 632 00:31:55,522 --> 00:32:00,092 ♪ I GET SO HARD NOW I COULD DIE ♪ 633 00:32:00,135 --> 00:32:03,269 ♪ 634 00:32:03,312 --> 00:32:04,661 ♪ OPEN UP YOUR POCKETBOOK 635 00:32:04,705 --> 00:32:06,054 ♪ GET ANOTHER QUARTER OUT 636 00:32:06,098 --> 00:32:07,447 ♪ DROP IT IN THE METER, MAMA 637 00:32:07,490 --> 00:32:10,885 ♪ TRY ME ON FOR SIZE 638 00:32:10,929 --> 00:32:14,236 ♪ 639 00:32:14,280 --> 00:32:15,629 ♪ OPEN UP YOUR POCKETBOOK 640 00:32:15,672 --> 00:32:17,065 ♪ GET ANOTHER QUARTER OUT 641 00:32:17,109 --> 00:32:18,501 ♪ DROP IT IN THE METER, MAMA 642 00:32:18,545 --> 00:32:21,765 ♪ TRY ME ON FOR SIZE 643 00:32:21,809 --> 00:32:24,812 ♪ 644 00:32:24,855 --> 00:32:27,989 ♪ OOH, THE WAY YOU SQUEEZE ME, BABY ♪ 645 00:32:28,033 --> 00:32:33,647 ♪ RED BALLOONS JUST POP BEHIND MY EYES ♪ 646 00:32:33,690 --> 00:32:36,389 ♪ 647 00:32:36,432 --> 00:32:39,218 ♪ OOH, THE WAY YOU SQUEEZE ME, GIRL ♪ 648 00:32:39,261 --> 00:32:44,397 ♪ RED BALLOONS JUST POP BEHIND MY EYES ♪ 649 00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:47,574 ♪ 650 00:32:47,617 --> 00:32:48,879 ♪ OPEN UP YOUR POCKETBOOK 651 00:32:48,923 --> 00:32:50,272 ♪ GET ANOTHER QUARTER OUT 652 00:32:50,316 --> 00:32:51,708 ♪ DROP IT IN THE METER, MAMA 653 00:32:51,752 --> 00:32:55,103 ♪ TRY ME ON FOR SIZE 654 00:32:55,147 --> 00:32:58,541 ♪ 655 00:32:58,585 --> 00:32:59,716 ♪ OPEN UP YOUR POCKETBOOK 656 00:32:59,760 --> 00:33:01,327 ♪ GET ANOTHER QUARTER OUT 657 00:33:01,370 --> 00:33:02,589 ♪ DROP IT IN THE METER, MAMA 658 00:33:02,632 --> 00:33:05,940 ♪ TRY ME ON FOR SIZE 659 00:33:05,984 --> 00:33:13,904 ♪ 660 00:34:15,227 --> 00:34:17,925 - ♪ DO YOU REALLY WANNA PLEASE ME? ♪ 661 00:34:17,968 --> 00:34:20,754 - ♪ WELL, YOU KNOW I DO, BABE 662 00:34:20,797 --> 00:34:23,496 - ♪ WELL, TELL ME WHY YOU DO IT ♪ 663 00:34:23,539 --> 00:34:25,715 ♪ I REALLY WANNA KNOW 664 00:34:25,759 --> 00:34:27,369 - ♪ OH, NO, NO, IT WOULDN'T BE RIGHT ♪ 665 00:34:27,413 --> 00:34:28,979 ♪ FOR ME TO TELL YOU TONIGHT 666 00:34:29,023 --> 00:34:30,198 - ♪ YOU BETTER TELL ME RIGHT AWAY ♪ 667 00:34:30,242 --> 00:34:31,982 ♪ OR I'LL PACK UP AND GO 668 00:34:32,026 --> 00:34:34,333 - ♪ DON'T GET MAD, IT AIN'T NO BIG THING ♪ 669 00:34:34,376 --> 00:34:35,812 - ♪ YOU BETTER TELL ME RIGHT AWAY ♪ 670 00:34:35,856 --> 00:34:37,553 ♪ DON'T YOU TREAT ME COLD 671 00:34:37,597 --> 00:34:40,817 - ♪ HOLD IT, HOLD IT, HOLD IT, HOLD IT ♪ 672 00:34:40,861 --> 00:34:44,212 WELL... 673 00:34:44,256 --> 00:34:46,649 THERE ARE A LOT OF REASONS WHY I'D-- 674 00:34:46,693 --> 00:34:49,870 I'D DRAG A GIRL SUCH AS YOURSELF BACK TO THIS... 675 00:34:49,913 --> 00:34:53,265 PLASTIC HOTEL ROOM AND... 676 00:34:53,308 --> 00:34:56,790 RIP YOU OFF FOR SPARE CHANGE TO RUN A-- 677 00:34:56,833 --> 00:34:59,793 TO RUN A VIBRATING MACHINE ATTACHED TO THIS 678 00:34:59,836 --> 00:35:04,058 QUEEN-SIZE, BULK-PURCHASE, KAPOK-INFESTED, 679 00:35:04,102 --> 00:35:07,366 DO-NOT-REMOVE-TAG-UNDER-PENALTY- OF-LAW TYPE BED AND... 680 00:35:07,409 --> 00:35:10,586 AND MAKE YOU TAKE OFF ALL YOUR LITTLE CLOTHES... 681 00:35:10,630 --> 00:35:15,591 UNTIL YOU WERE NEARLY STARK, RAVING NUDE! 682 00:35:15,635 --> 00:35:18,812 SAVE FOR YOUR CHROME WITH HEAVY-DUTY LEATHER THONG 683 00:35:18,855 --> 00:35:20,596 PEACE MEDALLION. 684 00:35:20,640 --> 00:35:22,859 AND MAKE YOU ASSUME A SERIES 685 00:35:22,903 --> 00:35:25,949 OF MARGINALLY EROTIC POSES INVOLVING... 686 00:35:25,993 --> 00:35:29,083 A PLASTIC CHAIR AND... 687 00:35:29,127 --> 00:35:31,085 AN OLD GUITAR STRAP, WHILE I... 688 00:35:31,129 --> 00:35:35,698 DID A WEE-WEE IN YOUR HAIR AND... 689 00:35:35,742 --> 00:35:38,092 BEAT YOU WITH A PAIR OF TENNIS SHOES... 690 00:35:38,136 --> 00:35:40,050 I GOT FROM JEFF BECK. 691 00:35:42,923 --> 00:35:45,055 - [muttering] 692 00:35:56,197 --> 00:35:58,634 OKAY, WHERE'S MY MANUSCRIPT HERE? 693 00:35:58,678 --> 00:36:00,375 WHERE'S THE PAPER? 694 00:36:00,419 --> 00:36:03,161 PART TWO OF THE HIGHWAY CALLED-- 695 00:36:03,204 --> 00:36:05,119 I GOT IT NOW. 696 00:36:05,163 --> 00:36:07,252 GOTTA WRITE THIS DOWN. 697 00:36:07,295 --> 00:36:10,124 I'VE GOT EVERYTHING I NEED... 698 00:36:10,168 --> 00:36:11,865 [sniffing] 699 00:36:11,908 --> 00:36:13,345 AGH. 700 00:36:13,388 --> 00:36:14,607 FOR MY NEW SYMPHONY. 701 00:36:14,650 --> 00:36:17,653 IT'S ALL HERE. [indistinct] 702 00:36:17,697 --> 00:36:19,046 - [echoey] SEE, THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS 703 00:36:19,089 --> 00:36:20,613 WHEN YOU JOIN A ROCK GROUP, GEORGE. 704 00:36:20,656 --> 00:36:22,397 - FANTASTIC. - GET OFF THAT JAZZ... 705 00:36:22,441 --> 00:36:23,920 - YES, I'VE GOT THEM NOW. 706 00:36:23,964 --> 00:36:26,662 - THERE'S NO LUST IN JAZZ. - [mumbling] 707 00:36:26,706 --> 00:36:28,403 AH, RIGHT. YES. 708 00:36:28,447 --> 00:36:33,626 AH, GET ON, SOUL BROTHERS. AH! GET IT ON. 709 00:36:33,669 --> 00:36:36,411 AH, THOSE BOYS, THOSE BOYS. 710 00:36:36,455 --> 00:36:38,500 THEY'RE DRIVING ME CRAZY. 711 00:36:38,544 --> 00:36:40,198 [indistinct chatter] 712 00:36:40,241 --> 00:36:43,201 - HEY, LOOK WHAT'S COMIN' THROUGH THE DOOR! 713 00:36:43,244 --> 00:36:44,941 all: HEY! 714 00:36:44,985 --> 00:36:46,943 [indistinct chatter] 715 00:36:46,987 --> 00:36:50,033 [angry, overlapping shouting] 716 00:36:54,995 --> 00:36:57,258 - MUHAMMITZ. 717 00:36:59,434 --> 00:37:01,131 IT'S REALLY GREAT NOW. 718 00:37:01,175 --> 00:37:05,179 AH! DOWN HERE... [indistinct] 719 00:37:05,223 --> 00:37:06,963 MORE PAPER, MORE PAPER... 720 00:37:07,007 --> 00:37:10,228 I NEED TO WRITE ON THIS NOW. 721 00:37:11,620 --> 00:37:14,232 PAGE TWO. WHAT'S THAT GOING TO BE? 722 00:37:14,275 --> 00:37:16,712 RIGHT! AH, AH. DROPPED MY HAT. 723 00:37:16,756 --> 00:37:18,061 BUT I DON'T CARE. 724 00:37:18,105 --> 00:37:19,585 [indistinct shouting] 725 00:37:19,628 --> 00:37:21,848 YES...YES! 726 00:37:21,891 --> 00:37:25,895 OH, GET IT ON. YEAH, THEY'RE GETTING NASTY. 727 00:37:25,939 --> 00:37:28,420 [crowd shouting] 728 00:37:43,217 --> 00:37:45,741 OHH! ANOTHER PAGE. 729 00:37:45,785 --> 00:37:49,223 OH, DON'T LEAVE ME. DON'T LEAVE ME. 730 00:37:49,267 --> 00:37:52,835 OH, I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOUR SUPER SUBSTANCES. 731 00:37:52,879 --> 00:37:56,491 OH, LET ME WRITE THAT DOWN-- SUPER SUBSTANCES. 732 00:37:56,535 --> 00:37:59,015 YES! AHA... 733 00:37:59,059 --> 00:38:00,190 [hysterical laughter] 734 00:38:00,234 --> 00:38:02,845 SHOW ME YOUR LITTLE VEST! 735 00:38:02,889 --> 00:38:04,673 'SCUSE ME. - [laughing hysterically] 736 00:38:04,717 --> 00:38:06,414 - OH, I WANT YOU NOW! 737 00:38:06,458 --> 00:38:08,155 OH, GOD. 738 00:38:08,198 --> 00:38:09,287 - [whooping] 739 00:38:09,330 --> 00:38:10,549 - COME HERE, LITTLE DARLING. 740 00:38:10,592 --> 00:38:13,726 [indistinct chatter and laughter] 741 00:38:15,293 --> 00:38:16,903 [zany whistle sound effect] 742 00:38:16,946 --> 00:38:20,298 [bells clanging] 743 00:38:20,341 --> 00:38:22,256 all: [echoey] THUS... - EEK! 744 00:38:22,300 --> 00:38:26,608 all: THE LAD SEARCHES THE NIGHT FOR HIS MUSE. 745 00:38:26,652 --> 00:38:28,436 BLORP! 746 00:38:29,829 --> 00:38:34,486 [discordant sound effects] 747 00:38:52,330 --> 00:38:56,725 - THE GIRL WANTS TO FIX HIM SOME BROTH. 748 00:38:58,553 --> 00:39:01,817 - ♪ TINSEL COCK 749 00:39:01,861 --> 00:39:03,297 all: ♪ DOO-WEE-DO 750 00:39:03,341 --> 00:39:06,300 ♪ TINSEL COCK, MY BABY 751 00:39:06,344 --> 00:39:08,084 - WOULD YOU LIKE SOME BROTH? 752 00:39:08,128 --> 00:39:09,825 - SOME NICE SOUP. - SOME HOT BROTH? 753 00:39:09,869 --> 00:39:12,306 - SMALL DOGS IN IT. 754 00:39:12,350 --> 00:39:15,309 - [vocalizing] DO YOU? 755 00:39:15,353 --> 00:39:18,356 - YOU LIKE BROTH? DOG BROTH? 756 00:39:18,399 --> 00:39:20,836 - HOT BROTH? [chorus chanting] 757 00:39:20,880 --> 00:39:22,577 YOU LIKE... - ♪ HOT 758 00:39:22,621 --> 00:39:24,579 - DOG BROTH HOT? - ♪ DOG BROTH 759 00:39:24,623 --> 00:39:26,102 - HOW DO YOU LIKE IT? 760 00:39:26,146 --> 00:39:30,977 DEBRIS OF THE FOUR STYLES OFFERED? 761 00:39:31,020 --> 00:39:32,544 DEBRIS, BROTH, BREATH, 762 00:39:32,587 --> 00:39:35,851 AND THE EVER-POPULAR 763 00:39:35,895 --> 00:39:37,810 HYGIENIC... 764 00:39:37,853 --> 00:39:39,551 EUROPEAN VERSION, 765 00:39:39,594 --> 00:39:42,118 TINSEL COCK! 766 00:39:42,162 --> 00:39:43,555 [ominous music] 767 00:39:43,598 --> 00:39:46,862 all: ♪ TINSEL COCK 768 00:39:46,906 --> 00:39:50,866 ♪ 769 00:39:50,910 --> 00:39:55,393 - [vocalizing] 770 00:39:55,436 --> 00:39:57,177 - WHICH... 771 00:39:57,220 --> 00:40:01,834 DO YOU CHOOSE? 772 00:40:06,665 --> 00:40:08,275 [flapping] 773 00:40:10,451 --> 00:40:12,366 - [squeaking] 774 00:40:12,410 --> 00:40:14,803 [no audio] 775 00:40:19,417 --> 00:40:21,810 - [squeaking] 776 00:40:24,509 --> 00:40:28,121 [weird blooping and wailing] 777 00:40:39,480 --> 00:40:41,917 [ominous music] 778 00:40:41,961 --> 00:40:43,658 - THE GIRL... 779 00:40:43,702 --> 00:40:46,922 [chorus singing] 780 00:40:46,966 --> 00:40:50,448 IN A STATEMENT TO THE PRESS... 781 00:40:50,491 --> 00:40:52,145 EXPLAINS. 782 00:40:56,976 --> 00:40:59,674 - [squeaking] 783 00:40:59,718 --> 00:41:04,505 - ♪ BROTH REMINDS ME OF NUNS 784 00:41:04,549 --> 00:41:07,769 ♪ I SEE THEM SMASHING KIDS WITH RULERS ♪ 785 00:41:07,813 --> 00:41:09,423 [thud, slurp] 786 00:41:09,467 --> 00:41:12,687 - ♪ DISCIPLINING MUNCHKIN CRETINS ♪ 787 00:41:12,731 --> 00:41:15,690 ♪ TORTURED MUNCHKINS 788 00:41:15,734 --> 00:41:17,518 ♪ TORTURED MUNCHKINS 789 00:41:17,562 --> 00:41:20,216 ♪ IRISH CATHOLIC VICTIMS 790 00:41:20,260 --> 00:41:24,220 ♪ LITTLE GREEN SCRATCHY SWEATERS ♪ 791 00:41:24,264 --> 00:41:25,613 all: ♪ SWEATERS 792 00:41:25,657 --> 00:41:29,487 - ♪ LITTLE GREEN SCRATCHY ONES ♪ 793 00:41:29,530 --> 00:41:32,664 ♪ BROWN CORDUROY PANTS 794 00:41:32,707 --> 00:41:37,669 [chorus vocalizing] 795 00:41:37,712 --> 00:41:39,584 ♪ CORDUROY PANTS 796 00:41:39,627 --> 00:41:43,936 all: ♪ AND GREEN SCRATCHY MUNCHKIN ♪ 797 00:41:43,979 --> 00:41:46,591 ♪ IRISH CATHOLIC VICTIMS 798 00:41:46,634 --> 00:41:49,463 all: ♪ MUNCH-KINS, MUNCH-A-KINS ♪ 799 00:41:49,507 --> 00:41:52,988 - ♪ MUNCHKINS GET ME HOT 800 00:41:53,032 --> 00:41:54,468 ♪ MUNCHKINS GET ME 801 00:41:54,512 --> 00:41:57,297 ♪ GET ME HOT 802 00:41:57,340 --> 00:41:58,733 - MUNCH! 803 00:41:58,777 --> 00:42:01,388 GETS HER REAL HOT! 804 00:42:03,303 --> 00:42:07,133 - ♪ WHY DON'T YOU STRAP ON ♪ 805 00:42:07,176 --> 00:42:08,656 ♪ THIS HERE BUNCH 806 00:42:08,700 --> 00:42:12,268 ♪ OF CARDBOARD BOXES, DADDY-O? ♪ 807 00:42:12,312 --> 00:42:17,273 ♪ JOY OF MY DESIRING 808 00:42:17,317 --> 00:42:21,800 ♪ YOU'LL CERTAINLY LOOK SUAVE AND GET ME HOT ♪ 809 00:42:21,843 --> 00:42:23,889 ♪ HOT, HOT, GET ME HOT 810 00:42:23,932 --> 00:42:26,021 ♪ AND HORNY 811 00:42:26,065 --> 00:42:28,284 - OHH! 812 00:42:28,328 --> 00:42:31,766 - ♪ IF THERE'S ONE THING I REALLY GET OFF ON ♪ 813 00:42:31,810 --> 00:42:36,510 ♪ IT'S A NUN SUIT PAINTED ON SOME OLD BOXES ♪ 814 00:42:36,554 --> 00:42:37,729 [crash] 815 00:42:37,772 --> 00:42:39,774 all: ♪ SOME OLD MELODIES 816 00:42:39,818 --> 00:42:41,036 [crash] 817 00:42:41,080 --> 00:42:42,690 ♪ FOUR, FOUR AN AURA 818 00:42:42,734 --> 00:42:45,301 [crash] all: ♪ AN AREOLA 819 00:42:45,345 --> 00:42:50,306 ♪ PINK GUMS 820 00:42:50,350 --> 00:42:55,834 ♪ STUMPY, GRAY TEETH 821 00:42:55,877 --> 00:43:00,534 ♪ DENTAL FLOSS 822 00:43:00,578 --> 00:43:06,148 ♪ GETS ME HOT 823 00:43:06,192 --> 00:43:12,633 ♪ WANNA WATCH A DENTAL HYGIENE MOVIE? ♪ 824 00:43:12,677 --> 00:43:15,027 [projector running] 825 00:43:19,684 --> 00:43:23,339 - ♪ HAN-NIN-NOO-NOON TAN-TOON-RAN ♪ 826 00:43:23,383 --> 00:43:25,124 - NO, JEFF. 827 00:43:25,167 --> 00:43:27,605 - ♪ RANTOON, RANTOON, RANTOON, FRAMMIN, HANTOON ♪ 828 00:43:27,648 --> 00:43:29,302 ♪ RANTOON, HANTOON, FRAMMIN - NO, NO, NO! 829 00:43:29,345 --> 00:43:30,956 - MAN! THIS STUFF IS GREAT! 830 00:43:30,999 --> 00:43:32,784 IT'S JUST AS IF DONOVAN HIMSELF 831 00:43:32,827 --> 00:43:35,351 HAD APPEARED ON MY VERY OWN TV WITH WORDS OF PEACE, LOVE, 832 00:43:35,395 --> 00:43:37,005 AND ETERNAL COSMIC WISDOM! 833 00:43:37,049 --> 00:43:39,225 [atonal music] 834 00:43:39,268 --> 00:43:40,792 LEADING ME, GUIDING ME 835 00:43:40,835 --> 00:43:43,795 ON PATHS OF EVERLASTING PSEUDO-KARMIC NEGLIGENCE, 836 00:43:43,838 --> 00:43:46,798 IN THE VERY MIDST OF MY DRUG-INDUCED NOCTURNAL EMISSION. 837 00:43:46,841 --> 00:43:48,800 - FOR I AM YOUR GOOD CONSCIENCE, JEFF. 838 00:43:48,843 --> 00:43:50,584 I KNOW ALL. I SEE ALL. 839 00:43:50,628 --> 00:43:52,891 I AM A COSMIC LOVE PULSE MATRIX, 840 00:43:52,934 --> 00:43:55,110 BECOMING A TECHNICOLOR INTERPOSITIVE! 841 00:43:55,154 --> 00:43:57,591 - HUH? 842 00:43:57,635 --> 00:44:00,333 - WHERE'D YOU BUY THAT INCENSE? 843 00:44:03,858 --> 00:44:05,338 IT'S HIP. 844 00:44:10,430 --> 00:44:11,866 IT'S THE SAME AND MYSTERIOUS 845 00:44:11,910 --> 00:44:13,433 EXOTIC ORIENTAL FRAGRANCE 846 00:44:13,476 --> 00:44:15,217 AS WHAT THE BEATLES GET OFF ON. 847 00:44:15,261 --> 00:44:17,567 - I THOUGHT I RECOGNIZED IT. 848 00:44:18,656 --> 00:44:20,396 [sniffing] 849 00:44:20,440 --> 00:44:21,615 MMM, WHAT IS THAT, MUSK? 850 00:44:21,659 --> 00:44:23,399 [sniffing] 851 00:44:23,443 --> 00:44:25,140 MMM. HMM. 852 00:44:25,184 --> 00:44:27,708 - JEFF, I KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR YOU. 853 00:44:27,752 --> 00:44:30,537 - RIGHT. 854 00:44:30,580 --> 00:44:32,365 YOU'RE HEAVY. 855 00:44:35,455 --> 00:44:38,023 - YES, JEFF, I AM YOUR GUIDING LIGHT. 856 00:44:38,066 --> 00:44:40,373 LISTEN TO ME. DON'T RIP OFF THE TOWELS, JEFF! 857 00:44:45,204 --> 00:44:47,815 - PISS OFF, YOU LITTLE NITWIT! 858 00:44:47,859 --> 00:44:49,556 - HEY, MAN, WHAT'S THE DEAL? 859 00:44:49,599 --> 00:44:52,037 - DON'T LISTEN TO HIM, JEFF. HE'S NO GOOD. 860 00:44:52,080 --> 00:44:53,865 HE'LL MAKE YOU DO BAD THINGS! 861 00:44:53,908 --> 00:44:56,171 [discordant music] 862 00:44:56,215 --> 00:44:58,739 [air honks out] 863 00:44:58,783 --> 00:45:00,480 [pop] 864 00:45:00,523 --> 00:45:02,395 - YOU MEAN, HE'LL MAKE ME SIN? 865 00:45:02,438 --> 00:45:03,439 - [clacking] 866 00:45:03,483 --> 00:45:04,832 - [clacking] 867 00:45:04,876 --> 00:45:06,051 - [buzzes] 868 00:45:10,490 --> 00:45:11,752 - YES, JEFF. 869 00:45:11,796 --> 00:45:14,973 - [laughing] 870 00:45:15,016 --> 00:45:16,496 - SIN. 871 00:45:16,539 --> 00:45:18,280 - WOW! 872 00:45:18,324 --> 00:45:22,197 [weird sound effects] 873 00:45:22,241 --> 00:45:25,070 - JEFF, I'D LIKE TO HAVE A WORD WITH YOU... 874 00:45:25,113 --> 00:45:26,941 ABOUT YOUR SOUL. 875 00:45:26,985 --> 00:45:28,595 - NO, DON'T LISTEN, JEFF. 876 00:45:28,638 --> 00:45:30,336 - WHY ARE YOU WASTING YOUR LIFE, NIGHT AFTER NIGHT, 877 00:45:30,379 --> 00:45:32,164 PLAYING THIS COMEDY MUSIC? 878 00:45:32,207 --> 00:45:34,383 - YOU'RE RIGHT, I'M TOO HEAVY TO BE IN THIS GROUP. 879 00:45:34,427 --> 00:45:36,472 - COMEDY MUSIC. 880 00:45:36,516 --> 00:45:38,170 - JEFF, YOUR SOUL! 881 00:45:38,213 --> 00:45:39,911 [popping and squeaking] 882 00:45:39,954 --> 00:45:43,523 [opera singer vocalizing] 883 00:45:43,566 --> 00:45:45,481 - IN THIS GROUP, ALL I EVER GET TO DO 884 00:45:45,525 --> 00:45:48,484 IS PLAY ZAPPA'S COMEDY MUSIC. HE EATS! 885 00:45:48,528 --> 00:45:50,225 - JEFF... - I GET SO TENSE! 886 00:45:50,269 --> 00:45:51,966 - OF COURSE YOU DO, MY BOY. 887 00:45:52,010 --> 00:45:53,402 - [robotically] THE STUFF...HE MAKES ME...DO 888 00:45:53,446 --> 00:45:56,231 IS ALWAYS...OFF THE WALL. 889 00:45:56,275 --> 00:45:59,974 - THAT'S WHY...IT WOULD BE BEST TO LEAVE...HIS STERN EMPLOY. 890 00:46:00,018 --> 00:46:01,236 - AND QUIT THE GROUP! 891 00:46:01,280 --> 00:46:02,760 - YOU'LL MAKE IT BIG! 892 00:46:02,803 --> 00:46:03,978 - THAT'S RIGHT! - OF COURSE! 893 00:46:04,022 --> 00:46:06,502 - AND THEN I WON'T BE SMALL! 894 00:46:06,546 --> 00:46:07,982 both: HA HA HA HA HA! 895 00:46:08,026 --> 00:46:10,332 HA HA HA! 896 00:46:10,376 --> 00:46:12,291 all: HA HA HA HA! 897 00:46:14,554 --> 00:46:16,121 - [coughing] 898 00:46:16,164 --> 00:46:18,253 AHMET ERTEGUN USED THIS TOWEL AS A BATHMAT 899 00:46:18,297 --> 00:46:20,734 SIX WEEKS AGO AT A RANCID MOTEL IN ORLANDO, FLORIDA, 900 00:46:20,778 --> 00:46:22,344 WITH THE HIGHEST MILDEW RATING 901 00:46:22,388 --> 00:46:24,042 OF ANY COMMERCIAL LODGING FACILITY 902 00:46:24,085 --> 00:46:25,957 WITHIN THE TERRITORIAL LIMITS OF THE UNITED STATES, 903 00:46:26,000 --> 00:46:27,872 NATURALLY EXCLUDING TROPICAL POSSESSIONS. 904 00:46:27,915 --> 00:46:29,525 [gagging and coughing] 905 00:46:29,569 --> 00:46:32,224 IT'S STILL DAMP. WHAT AN AROMA! 906 00:46:32,267 --> 00:46:33,747 THIS IS THE BEST I EVER GOT OFF. 907 00:46:33,791 --> 00:46:35,053 WHAT CAN I SAY ABOUT THIS ELIXIR? 908 00:46:35,096 --> 00:46:36,837 TRY IT ON STEAKS. CLEANS NYLONS. 909 00:46:36,881 --> 00:46:38,273 SMALL CRAFT WARNING. IT'S GREAT FOR THE HOME, 910 00:46:38,317 --> 00:46:39,535 THE OFFICE, ON FRUITS! 911 00:46:39,579 --> 00:46:41,276 - THIS IS THE REAL YOU, JEFF. 912 00:46:41,320 --> 00:46:42,756 RIP OFF A FEW MORE ASHTRAYS. 913 00:46:42,800 --> 00:46:44,279 GET RID OF SOME OF THAT INNER TENSION. 914 00:46:44,323 --> 00:46:45,803 QUIT THE COMEDY GROUP! 915 00:46:45,846 --> 00:46:47,282 GET YOUR OWN GROUP TOGETHER. 916 00:46:47,326 --> 00:46:49,545 HEAVY! LIKE GRAND FUNK! 917 00:46:49,589 --> 00:46:50,895 [dramatic music] 918 00:46:50,938 --> 00:46:51,983 OR BLACK SABBATH. 919 00:46:52,026 --> 00:46:52,984 - NO, JEFF. 920 00:46:53,027 --> 00:46:54,550 - OR COVEN! 921 00:46:54,594 --> 00:46:57,205 PEACE... 922 00:46:57,249 --> 00:46:59,207 LOVE... 923 00:46:59,251 --> 00:47:00,643 BOLLOCKS. 924 00:47:00,687 --> 00:47:02,297 BLAHH! 925 00:47:02,341 --> 00:47:05,692 both: WHAT CAN I SAY ABOUT THIS ELIXIR?! 926 00:47:05,735 --> 00:47:08,390 - WELL, PUT IT ON YOUR STEAKS. - SOAK YOUR SHIRTS IN IT. 927 00:47:08,434 --> 00:47:09,565 [overlapping voices] - SELL IT TO YOUR MOTHER. 928 00:47:09,609 --> 00:47:11,306 TELL HER IT'S A RIT TIE-DYE. 929 00:47:11,350 --> 00:47:15,789 [overlapping voices] - STARCH YOUR SHIRT WITH IT. 930 00:47:15,833 --> 00:47:19,662 [overlapping chatter] 931 00:47:19,706 --> 00:47:21,055 - LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, YOU CAN INHALE IT. 932 00:47:21,099 --> 00:47:23,579 - AND IT MAKES YOUR VOICE SQUEAKY. 933 00:47:23,623 --> 00:47:25,146 [crash] - THEN WHAT HAPPENS 934 00:47:25,190 --> 00:47:26,713 WHEN YOU PUT IT ON YOUR HAIR... 935 00:47:26,756 --> 00:47:29,759 - TIE YOUR BIKE WITH IT. [overlapping chatter] 936 00:47:29,803 --> 00:47:33,720 all: WHAT? - WAAAAH! 937 00:47:33,763 --> 00:47:35,200 all: WHAT CAN I... 938 00:47:35,243 --> 00:47:39,726 - WAAAAAH! 939 00:47:39,769 --> 00:47:41,032 all: WHAT? 940 00:47:41,075 --> 00:47:44,600 WHAT CAN I SAY ABOUT THIS? 941 00:47:44,644 --> 00:47:48,343 - WAAAAAAAH! 942 00:47:48,387 --> 00:47:50,824 - ♪ DWEE-DOO DEE-OOO-POO 943 00:47:50,868 --> 00:47:54,262 ♪ PAN 944 00:47:54,306 --> 00:47:56,221 - DOES THIS KIND OF LIFE LOOK INTERESTING TO YOU? 945 00:47:56,264 --> 00:47:58,223 NIGHT AFTER NIGHT, DINNERS WITH HERB COHEN. 946 00:47:58,266 --> 00:48:00,616 THRILL-PACKED, FUN-FILLED EVENINGS ON THE FRENCH RIVIERA 947 00:48:00,660 --> 00:48:01,661 AT THE MIDEM CONVENTION. 948 00:48:01,704 --> 00:48:03,010 A FAKE TIE, THE WHOLE BIT. 949 00:48:03,054 --> 00:48:05,056 WATCH MUTT EAT, AND LEON FEED THE GEESE. 950 00:48:05,099 --> 00:48:06,405 1,000 GREEN BUSINESS CARDS 951 00:48:06,448 --> 00:48:07,972 WITH YOUR NAME AND THE WRONG ADDRESS. 952 00:48:08,015 --> 00:48:09,712 PLUS SIX ROYALTY STATEMENTS, INSPECTED AND CUSTOMIZED 953 00:48:09,756 --> 00:48:11,976 BY RAN TOON TAN, HAN TOON, FRAMMIN, AND DEE, 954 00:48:12,019 --> 00:48:13,629 FOLLOWED BY 12 POTENTIAL SUICIDES 955 00:48:13,673 --> 00:48:15,153 AS THE MEMBERS OF YOUR GROUP, PAST AND PRESENT, 956 00:48:15,196 --> 00:48:16,632 FIND OUT THEY CAN'T COLLECT UNEMPLOYMENT. 957 00:48:16,676 --> 00:48:18,634 A DOG, A CAR, AN EPIDEMIC OF BODY LICE, 958 00:48:18,678 --> 00:48:20,636 WITH YOUR OWN RECORD COMPANY, YOUR NAME ON THE DOOR, 959 00:48:20,680 --> 00:48:22,551 ELECTRIC BUZZER TO THE INNER OFFICE AND ONA'S TITS, 960 00:48:22,595 --> 00:48:23,901 AND A THREE-MONTH SUPPLY OF GERMAN BOOKINGS 961 00:48:23,944 --> 00:48:25,424 WITH TICKETS ON AIR RANGOON. 962 00:48:25,467 --> 00:48:27,208 DOES THIS KIND OF LIFE LOOK INTERESTING TO YOU 963 00:48:27,252 --> 00:48:29,428 AS A FAKE ROCK AND ROLL GUITAR PLAYER IN A COMEDY GROUP? 964 00:48:29,471 --> 00:48:32,083 - ♪ HUNNA HUNNA HUNNA 965 00:48:32,126 --> 00:48:36,130 ♪ 200 MOTELS 966 00:48:36,174 --> 00:48:39,133 [discordant music] 967 00:48:39,177 --> 00:48:42,963 ♪ 968 00:48:43,007 --> 00:48:47,576 ♪ 200 MOTELS 969 00:48:47,620 --> 00:48:48,838 ♪ 970 00:48:48,882 --> 00:48:50,666 ♪ RAN TOON HAN TOON 971 00:48:50,710 --> 00:48:54,627 ♪ HAN-TOON-HAN 972 00:48:54,670 --> 00:48:59,240 ♪ 200 MOTELS 973 00:48:59,284 --> 00:49:02,026 ♪ 974 00:49:02,069 --> 00:49:06,117 - I'M STEALING THE ROOM! 975 00:49:08,946 --> 00:49:11,905 I'M STEALING THE ROOM! 976 00:49:11,949 --> 00:49:14,386 [crash and clatter] 977 00:49:15,865 --> 00:49:18,390 [crash and clatter] 978 00:49:28,008 --> 00:49:31,229 AAAAH! OOOOW! 979 00:49:33,622 --> 00:49:35,450 - I'M GOING TO DIE. 980 00:49:35,494 --> 00:49:37,061 I KNOW I'M GOING TO DIE. 981 00:49:37,104 --> 00:49:40,629 I CAN TELL BECAUSE MY PULSE IS SO WEAK. 982 00:49:40,673 --> 00:49:43,458 THE PILLS... I TOOK SO MANY DOWNERS 983 00:49:43,502 --> 00:49:45,591 THAT I KNOW THIS IS THE END FOR ME. 984 00:49:45,634 --> 00:49:47,027 - YOU POOR THING. 985 00:49:47,071 --> 00:49:48,463 YOU WANT I SHOULD FIX YOUR HAIR FOR YOU 986 00:49:48,507 --> 00:49:50,422 SO YOU LOOK GOOD WHEN THEY FIND YOU? 987 00:49:50,465 --> 00:49:52,380 - OH, WOULD YOU? - SURE, WHAT DO YOU WANT? 988 00:49:52,424 --> 00:49:55,209 A PONYTAIL? A FLAT-TOP WITH FENDERS? 989 00:49:55,253 --> 00:49:56,950 I'M GONNA DIE, JANET. 990 00:49:56,994 --> 00:50:01,259 I'M GONNA O.D.! SO MAKE ME LOOK GOOD. 991 00:50:01,302 --> 00:50:03,217 - LISTEN, THE BEST I CAN DO FOR YOU IS FIX YOUR HAIR, 992 00:50:03,261 --> 00:50:04,697 SO WHY DON'T YOU GET UP 993 00:50:04,740 --> 00:50:07,221 AND WASH THAT MELTED EYE MAKEUP OFF YOUR FACE? 994 00:50:07,265 --> 00:50:08,744 - IS IT SMEARED? 995 00:50:08,788 --> 00:50:11,008 I'VE BEEN CRYING SO MUCH... 996 00:50:11,051 --> 00:50:12,835 IT'S SO DAMN SAD 997 00:50:12,879 --> 00:50:15,969 WHEN YOU KNOW YOU'LL NEVER SEE ALL YOUR FRIENDS ANYMORE. 998 00:50:16,013 --> 00:50:17,449 [sobbing] - OH... 999 00:50:17,492 --> 00:50:18,972 EVERY WEEK, IT'S THE SAME OLD THING. 1000 00:50:19,016 --> 00:50:21,757 YOU'RE GONNA DIE. YOU'RE GONNA DIE. 1001 00:50:21,801 --> 00:50:23,107 SOMEBODY WENT OUT ON YOU. 1002 00:50:23,150 --> 00:50:24,760 SOMEBODY DOESN'T LOVE YOU ANYMORE. 1003 00:50:24,804 --> 00:50:26,762 HOW LONG YOU BEEN A GROUPIE? 1004 00:50:26,806 --> 00:50:30,636 YOU SHOULD GET USED TO ROMANCES WHICH ARE SO OBVIOUSLY CHEAP. 1005 00:50:30,679 --> 00:50:32,507 LISTEN, JUST IN CASE YOU CRASH OUT, 1006 00:50:32,551 --> 00:50:35,815 AND THE IMAGINARY ROCK AND ROLL NEWSPAPER FROM SAN FRANCISCO 1007 00:50:35,858 --> 00:50:37,773 WANTS TO GET ANY PICTURES OF YOU, 1008 00:50:37,817 --> 00:50:39,688 YOU'LL LOOK LIKE YOU WASHED YOUR FACE. 1009 00:50:39,732 --> 00:50:42,343 REALLY, IT'S BETTER THIS WAY WITH A CLEAN FACE. 1010 00:50:42,387 --> 00:50:45,085 PEOPLE THINK GROUPIES ARE SUCH DIRTY GIRLS. 1011 00:50:45,129 --> 00:50:46,826 - [scoffs] 1012 00:50:46,869 --> 00:50:49,263 WOULDN'T MIND SORT OF FUCKING ALL THREE OF THEM. 1013 00:50:49,307 --> 00:50:50,743 [chuckles] 1014 00:50:50,786 --> 00:50:52,571 - LOOK, OVER THERE! - WHAT? 1015 00:50:52,614 --> 00:50:54,007 - HE'S DOING IT, HE'S WATCHING US 1016 00:50:54,051 --> 00:50:55,530 FROM THE FAKE BANDSTAND WITH THE BINOCULARS! 1017 00:50:55,574 --> 00:50:56,792 - WHO, THE ENGLISHNESS? 1018 00:50:56,836 --> 00:50:58,229 - THE RIVET BOY. 1019 00:50:58,272 --> 00:51:00,492 - THE RIVET BOY? WHERE? 1020 00:51:00,535 --> 00:51:01,971 - OVER THERE. WIPE THAT STUFF OUT OF YOUR EYES. 1021 00:51:02,015 --> 00:51:03,538 IT LOOKS LIKE HE'S BEATING OFF. 1022 00:51:03,582 --> 00:51:05,801 - BEATING OFF? I KNEW HE WAS A PERVERT. 1023 00:51:05,845 --> 00:51:08,804 - OOH, HOW EXCITING. 1024 00:51:08,848 --> 00:51:10,806 HEY, ARE YOU STILL TRYING TO O.D.? 1025 00:51:10,850 --> 00:51:14,245 - YES, THIS DEFINITELY IS THE END FOR ME. 1026 00:51:14,288 --> 00:51:16,899 I FEEL SO FAINT AND SO WEAK. 1027 00:51:16,943 --> 00:51:18,075 [whimpering] - OH! 1028 00:51:18,118 --> 00:51:20,033 [comical bouncing sound] 1029 00:51:20,077 --> 00:51:21,991 - [sobbing] 1030 00:51:24,603 --> 00:51:26,083 - GOOD EVENING, HONEY. 1031 00:51:26,126 --> 00:51:27,562 THAT WAS THE MOST IMAGINARY COLLAPSE 1032 00:51:27,606 --> 00:51:29,390 I'VE SEEN SINCE LAST WEEK. 1033 00:51:29,434 --> 00:51:31,392 - JANET, DO YOU THINK SHE'S GOING TO DIE? 1034 00:51:31,436 --> 00:51:33,829 - ARE YOU KIDDING? DID YOU SEE HER HIT THE FLOOR? 1035 00:51:33,873 --> 00:51:36,267 - GOD, WELL, IT WAS SO OBVIOUSLY CHEAP. 1036 00:51:36,310 --> 00:51:38,269 LIFT THE HEAD, HONEY. - I'M GONNA TO DIE. 1037 00:51:38,312 --> 00:51:40,358 THIS TIME IT'S REAL. 1038 00:51:40,401 --> 00:51:42,142 OH, IT'S SO, UM... 1039 00:51:42,186 --> 00:51:44,318 - LISTEN, LUCY, WE GOTTA GET READY FOR OUR BIG DANCE NUMBER. 1040 00:51:44,362 --> 00:51:46,233 WE'RE GOING TO THE FAKE NIGHTCLUB TONIGHT. 1041 00:51:46,277 --> 00:51:49,584 - OH, EVERYTHING'S GETTING DIM. 1042 00:51:49,628 --> 00:51:51,325 - WHY DON'T YOU TELL HER A STORY 1043 00:51:51,369 --> 00:51:53,066 WHILE YOU PUT YOUR MAKEUP ON? 1044 00:51:53,110 --> 00:51:55,329 GOOD EVENING. 1045 00:51:55,373 --> 00:51:57,766 - OHH. 1046 00:51:57,810 --> 00:51:59,855 [toilet flushes] LISTEN, TOOTS. 1047 00:51:59,899 --> 00:52:02,684 I'M GOING TO MAKE UP A NICE LITTLE FAIRY TALE FOR YOU. 1048 00:52:02,728 --> 00:52:07,254 - THE PILLS, THE MANDRAX-- I TOOK SO MANY OF THEM. 1049 00:52:07,298 --> 00:52:09,169 - I'LL TELL YOU PART OF THE STORY, 1050 00:52:09,213 --> 00:52:11,693 AND THEN YOU MAKE UP ANOTHER PART THAT GOES ALONG WITH IT. 1051 00:52:11,737 --> 00:52:14,870 ONCE UPON A TIME, THERE WAS A TALL... 1052 00:52:14,914 --> 00:52:18,004 HANDSOME, MUSCULAR... 1053 00:52:18,047 --> 00:52:20,180 - DWARF. 1054 00:52:20,224 --> 00:52:21,790 - WITH A VERY SPECIAL... 1055 00:52:21,834 --> 00:52:25,403 - SWEDISH APPARATUS. 1056 00:52:25,446 --> 00:52:28,449 - THAT HIM AND HIS FRIENDS WOULD USE IN CONJUNCTION WITH... 1057 00:52:28,493 --> 00:52:31,887 - BOLD NEW SURGICAL EXPERIMENTS. 1058 00:52:31,931 --> 00:52:34,107 [spring sound effect] 1059 00:52:34,151 --> 00:52:35,543 - INVOLVING... 1060 00:52:35,587 --> 00:52:37,980 - A BLUDGEON AND A BOTTLE OF CHAMPAGNE... 1061 00:52:38,024 --> 00:52:39,678 - AND A... 1062 00:52:39,721 --> 00:52:41,549 - MICROWAVE OVEN... 1063 00:52:41,593 --> 00:52:42,811 - FROM A... 1064 00:52:42,855 --> 00:52:45,684 - JUMBO JET, ONE OF THE BIG JOBS 1065 00:52:45,727 --> 00:52:48,643 LEASED FROM AIR RANGOON! 1066 00:52:48,687 --> 00:52:50,602 - WHICH, WHEN USED CORRECTLY... 1067 00:52:50,645 --> 00:52:53,518 - CAN EFFECTIVELY INCREASE THE DIMENSIONS... 1068 00:52:53,561 --> 00:52:55,607 - AND FIREPOWER OF YOUR... 1069 00:52:55,650 --> 00:52:57,086 - DICK... 1070 00:52:57,130 --> 00:52:58,566 - TO THE POINT WHERE... 1071 00:52:58,610 --> 00:53:00,612 - IN SOME INSTANCES, 1072 00:53:00,655 --> 00:53:04,355 IT SHOULD BE CLASSIFIED AS A LETHAL WEAPON. 1073 00:53:04,398 --> 00:53:08,141 [drum roll] 1074 00:53:08,185 --> 00:53:12,406 - ♪ YOUR DICK 1075 00:53:12,450 --> 00:53:13,929 all: YOUR DICK? 1076 00:53:13,973 --> 00:53:14,930 ♪ 1077 00:53:14,974 --> 00:53:17,672 ♪ YOUR 1078 00:53:17,716 --> 00:53:20,240 ♪ DORK 1079 00:53:20,284 --> 00:53:22,938 both: YOUR DORK? 1080 00:53:22,982 --> 00:53:27,421 all: ♪ YOUR PRICK 1081 00:53:27,465 --> 00:53:28,770 both: YOUR PRICK? 1082 00:53:28,814 --> 00:53:30,250 [clang] 1083 00:53:30,294 --> 00:53:35,168 all: ♪ YOUR PORK 1084 00:53:35,212 --> 00:53:37,170 - YOUR PORK? 1085 00:53:37,214 --> 00:53:38,171 [orchestra crescendos] 1086 00:53:38,215 --> 00:53:39,999 - YOUR PORK? 1087 00:53:40,042 --> 00:53:41,392 - WHO CALLS IT A PORK? 1088 00:53:41,435 --> 00:53:44,960 THESE MEN, AND THE STUFF THEY CALL A WEE-WEE. 1089 00:53:45,004 --> 00:53:45,961 [orchestra crescendos] 1090 00:53:46,005 --> 00:53:47,963 both: A WEE-WEE? 1091 00:53:48,007 --> 00:53:52,185 [wild drum lick] 1092 00:53:52,229 --> 00:53:55,188 - YOU MEAN A PENIS, DON'T YOU? 1093 00:53:55,232 --> 00:53:57,712 [wild drum lick] 1094 00:53:57,756 --> 00:53:59,453 - A PENIS? 1095 00:53:59,497 --> 00:54:02,239 PENIS IS SUCH AN UGLY WORD. 1096 00:54:02,282 --> 00:54:04,153 [wild drum lick] 1097 00:54:04,197 --> 00:54:05,459 - IT'S NOT THAT UGLY, REALLY. 1098 00:54:05,503 --> 00:54:07,809 - SURE, I-I USE IT ALL THE TIME. 1099 00:54:07,853 --> 00:54:09,724 [wild drum lick] 1100 00:54:09,768 --> 00:54:12,727 - SURE, SURE, WE ALL SAY IT EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE. 1101 00:54:12,771 --> 00:54:13,728 LISTEN... 1102 00:54:13,772 --> 00:54:15,426 both: PENIS! 1103 00:54:15,469 --> 00:54:16,992 [drums crash] 1104 00:54:17,036 --> 00:54:19,430 all: EWW! 1105 00:54:19,473 --> 00:54:21,997 [piano tinkling] 1106 00:54:22,041 --> 00:54:25,218 [drum roll] 1107 00:54:25,262 --> 00:54:28,003 all: PENIS! 1108 00:54:28,047 --> 00:54:29,396 [orchestra plays] 1109 00:54:29,440 --> 00:54:31,006 PENIS! 1110 00:54:31,050 --> 00:54:33,313 - EW, IT SOUNDS SO REVOLTING THE WAY YOU GUYS SAY IT. 1111 00:54:33,357 --> 00:54:35,750 EW, CACA. 1112 00:54:35,794 --> 00:54:38,057 - CACA! - CA! 1113 00:54:38,100 --> 00:54:40,015 [orchestra crescendos] 1114 00:54:40,059 --> 00:54:44,281 - THE PENIS CAN BE A VERY USEFUL ORGAN. 1115 00:54:44,324 --> 00:54:46,021 - YEAH, AND VERY EXCITING, TOO, 1116 00:54:46,065 --> 00:54:47,284 ONCE YOU GET TO KNOW ME. 1117 00:54:47,327 --> 00:54:48,285 [all agree] 1118 00:54:48,328 --> 00:54:51,026 [orchestra crescendos] 1119 00:54:51,070 --> 00:54:53,594 all: PENIS! 1120 00:54:53,638 --> 00:54:56,249 - IT SOUNDS SO OVERWHELMINGLY MEDICINAL. 1121 00:54:56,293 --> 00:54:57,903 - A PENIS SOUNDS LIKE SOMETHING A DOCTOR 1122 00:54:57,946 --> 00:54:59,383 WOULD HAVE HANGING OFF OF HIM. 1123 00:54:59,426 --> 00:55:01,254 - NONE OF THE MEN I KNOW AND LOVE 1124 00:55:01,298 --> 00:55:03,256 IN THE ROCK AND ROLL BUSINESS GOT PENISES. 1125 00:55:03,300 --> 00:55:05,780 THEY ALL GOT COCKS OR DICKS, AT LEAST. 1126 00:55:05,824 --> 00:55:07,782 - SURE, YOU WANT TO GO STRAP ON A POP STAR, 1127 00:55:07,826 --> 00:55:09,480 AND HE WANTS TO STICK A PENIS UP YOU. 1128 00:55:09,523 --> 00:55:11,264 WHERE IS THAT AT? 1129 00:55:11,308 --> 00:55:14,311 - LET'S ASK OUR STUDIO AUDIENCE! 1130 00:55:14,354 --> 00:55:16,313 [applause] 1131 00:55:16,356 --> 00:55:19,316 [chorus vocalizing] 1132 00:55:19,359 --> 00:55:24,408 ♪ 1133 00:55:24,451 --> 00:55:28,063 WILL YOU TRADE WHAT HE HAS IN HIS PANTS 1134 00:55:28,107 --> 00:55:31,545 FOR WHAT I HAVE BEHIND THIS CURTAIN? 1135 00:55:31,589 --> 00:55:34,069 [chorus vocalizing] - WHAT IS IT? 1136 00:55:34,113 --> 00:55:35,854 - YOU MEAN WHAT'S IN HIS PANTS? 1137 00:55:35,897 --> 00:55:38,378 - I KNOW WHAT'S IN HIS PANTS. HE'S A LONELY GUY. 1138 00:55:38,422 --> 00:55:41,294 [orchestra shouting] 1139 00:55:41,338 --> 00:55:45,298 - YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE BEFORE THE BIG WHEEL STOPS WHIRLING. 1140 00:55:45,342 --> 00:55:47,518 YOU! HEY, BUDDY! SKY MARSHAL! 1141 00:55:47,561 --> 00:55:50,347 GO WHIRL THE BIG WHEEL! 1142 00:55:50,390 --> 00:55:52,087 - CAN I JUST TAKE THE MONEY? 1143 00:55:52,131 --> 00:55:54,438 - THERE ISN'T ANY MONEY, JUST THE CURTAIN AND... 1144 00:55:54,481 --> 00:55:56,440 - THE LONELY GUY. 1145 00:55:56,483 --> 00:55:59,312 [overlapping shouts] 1146 00:55:59,356 --> 00:56:02,097 - TIME IS RUNNING OUT. 1147 00:56:02,141 --> 00:56:04,535 THINK IT OVER CAREFULLY. 1148 00:56:04,578 --> 00:56:05,536 - THE CURTAIN! 1149 00:56:05,579 --> 00:56:06,537 - I WANT THE MONEY. 1150 00:56:06,580 --> 00:56:07,842 - WAIT! 1151 00:56:07,886 --> 00:56:08,843 [drums crash] 1152 00:56:08,887 --> 00:56:09,844 WHAT COULD IT BE IN THERE? 1153 00:56:09,888 --> 00:56:10,976 - IN HIS PANTS? 1154 00:56:11,019 --> 00:56:12,673 - IN THE CURTAIN. 1155 00:56:12,717 --> 00:56:15,807 - DOESN'T ANYBODY CARE WHAT'S IN MY PANTS? 1156 00:56:15,850 --> 00:56:22,335 all: ♪ PENIS DIMENSION 1157 00:56:22,379 --> 00:56:24,337 [rhythmic clapping] 1158 00:56:24,381 --> 00:56:30,561 ♪ PENIS DIMENSION 1159 00:56:30,604 --> 00:56:34,869 [orchestra plays] 1160 00:56:34,913 --> 00:56:38,351 ♪ PENIS DIMENSION 1161 00:56:38,395 --> 00:56:41,615 ♪ IS WORRYING ME 1162 00:56:41,659 --> 00:56:43,835 [boom] 1163 00:56:46,925 --> 00:56:49,623 ♪ I CAN'T HARDLY 1164 00:56:49,667 --> 00:56:52,757 ♪ SLEEP AT NIGHT 1165 00:56:52,800 --> 00:56:54,149 ♪ 'CAUSE OF 1166 00:56:54,193 --> 00:57:02,593 ♪ PENIS DIMENSION 1167 00:57:02,636 --> 00:57:05,770 [clanking] 1168 00:57:05,813 --> 00:57:08,773 [orchestra playing slowly] 1169 00:57:08,816 --> 00:57:12,907 ♪ 1170 00:57:12,951 --> 00:57:14,909 ♪ DO YOU WORRY? 1171 00:57:14,953 --> 00:57:20,437 ♪ DO YOU WORRY A LOT? 1172 00:57:25,137 --> 00:57:26,660 NO! 1173 00:57:26,704 --> 00:57:27,748 - NO, I DON'T. 1174 00:57:27,792 --> 00:57:30,621 [indistinct chatter] 1175 00:57:35,452 --> 00:57:37,628 ♪ DO YOU WORRY? 1176 00:57:37,671 --> 00:57:42,197 ♪ DO YOU WORRY AND MOAN 1177 00:57:42,241 --> 00:57:45,505 ♪ OHH OHH OHH OHH 1178 00:57:45,549 --> 00:57:51,206 ♪ THAT THE SIZE OF YOUR COCK 1179 00:57:51,250 --> 00:57:58,692 ♪ IS NOT MONSTROUS ENOUGH? 1180 00:57:58,736 --> 00:58:01,478 all: NO! 1181 00:58:01,521 --> 00:58:07,701 ♪ IT'S YOUR PENIS DIMENSION 1182 00:58:07,745 --> 00:58:10,225 [orchestra crescendos] 1183 00:58:10,269 --> 00:58:11,966 ♪ 1184 00:58:12,010 --> 00:58:19,887 ♪ PENIS DIMENSION 1185 00:58:22,499 --> 00:58:27,460 - ♪ WAH OOO-WAH OOO-WAH OOO-WAH ♪ 1186 00:58:27,504 --> 00:58:33,248 ♪ WAH OOO-WAH OOO-WAH OOO-WAH ♪ 1187 00:58:33,292 --> 00:58:37,470 [whistling] 1188 00:58:37,514 --> 00:58:42,736 ♪ 1189 00:58:42,780 --> 00:58:44,738 - HIYA, FRIENDS. 1190 00:58:44,782 --> 00:58:47,524 NOW, JUST BE HONEST ABOUT IT. 1191 00:58:47,567 --> 00:58:51,528 DID YOU EVER CONSIDER THE POSSIBILITY THAT YOUR PENIS, 1192 00:58:51,571 --> 00:58:54,966 AND IN THE CASE OF MANY DIGNIFIED LADIES, 1193 00:58:55,009 --> 00:58:58,273 THAT THE SIZE OF THE TITTIES THEMSELVES 1194 00:58:58,317 --> 00:59:03,278 MIGHT PROVIDE ELEMENTS OF SUBCONSCIOUS TENSION? 1195 00:59:03,322 --> 00:59:05,019 - ♪ OOH 1196 00:59:05,063 --> 00:59:07,718 - WEIRD, TWISTED ANXIETIES 1197 00:59:07,761 --> 00:59:10,024 THAT COULD FORCE A HUMAN BEING 1198 00:59:10,068 --> 00:59:14,289 TO HAVE TO BECOME A POLITICIAN! 1199 00:59:14,333 --> 00:59:16,770 A POLICEMAN! 1200 00:59:16,814 --> 00:59:19,033 A JESUIT MONK! 1201 00:59:19,077 --> 00:59:20,774 - [indistinct] 1202 00:59:20,818 --> 00:59:23,777 - A ROCK AND ROLL GUITAR PLAYER! 1203 00:59:23,821 --> 00:59:25,562 A WINO! 1204 00:59:25,605 --> 00:59:27,041 YOU NAME IT. 1205 00:59:27,085 --> 00:59:29,566 OR, IN THE CASE OF THE LADIES, 1206 00:59:29,609 --> 00:59:33,308 THE ONES THAT CAN'T AFFORD A SILICONE BEEF-UP, 1207 00:59:33,352 --> 00:59:36,790 THEY BECOME WRITERS OF HOT BOOKS: 1208 00:59:36,834 --> 00:59:39,750 "MANUEL, THE GARDENER, 1209 00:59:39,793 --> 00:59:45,320 PLACED HIS BURNING PHALLUS IN HER QUIVERING QUIM." 1210 00:59:45,364 --> 00:59:49,542 - [laughing] YES, OR THEY BECOME CARMELITE NUNS! 1211 00:59:49,586 --> 00:59:54,068 - "GONZO, THE LEAD GUITAR PLAYER, 1212 00:59:54,112 --> 00:59:59,073 PLACED HIS MUTATED MEMBER IN HER SLITHERING SLIT." 1213 00:59:59,117 --> 01:00:00,814 HA HA HA! 1214 01:00:00,858 --> 01:00:03,904 - OOH, OR RACE HORSE JOCKEYS. 1215 01:00:03,948 --> 01:00:07,038 THERE IS NO REASON WHY YOU OR YOUR LOVED ONES 1216 01:00:07,081 --> 01:00:08,735 SHOULD SUFFER. 1217 01:00:08,779 --> 01:00:12,347 THINGS ARE BAD ENOUGH WITHOUT THE SIZE OF YOUR ORGAN 1218 01:00:12,391 --> 01:00:15,350 ADDING EVEN MORE MISERY TO THE TROUBLES OF THE WORLD! 1219 01:00:15,394 --> 01:00:17,178 - RIGHT ON! RIGHT ON! 1220 01:00:17,222 --> 01:00:21,792 - NOW, IF YOU'RE A LADY AND YOU'VE GOT MUNCHKIN TITS, 1221 01:00:21,835 --> 01:00:25,796 YOU CAN CONSOLE YOURSELF WITH THIS AGE-OLD LINE 1222 01:00:25,839 --> 01:00:28,363 FROM PRIMARY SCHOOL: 1223 01:00:28,407 --> 01:00:32,977 both: ANYTHING OVER A MOUTHFUL IS WASTED! 1224 01:00:33,020 --> 01:00:35,849 - YES! AND ISN'T IT THE TRUTH? 1225 01:00:35,893 --> 01:00:37,634 AND IF YOU'RE A GUY, 1226 01:00:37,677 --> 01:00:39,374 AND ONE NIGHT YOU'RE AT A PARTY, 1227 01:00:39,418 --> 01:00:41,594 AND YOU'RE TRYING TO BE COOL, I MEAN... 1228 01:00:41,638 --> 01:00:44,379 YOU AREN'T EVEN WEARING ANY UNDERWEAR, YOU'RE BEING SO COOL, 1229 01:00:44,423 --> 01:00:46,860 AND SOMEBODY HITS ON YOU ONE NIGHT, 1230 01:00:46,904 --> 01:00:49,733 AND HE LOOKS YOU UP AND DOWN AND HE SAYS, UH... 1231 01:00:49,776 --> 01:00:55,086 - "EIGHT INCHES OR LESS?" 1232 01:00:55,129 --> 01:00:56,914 - WELL LET ME TELL YOU, BROTHERS, 1233 01:00:56,957 --> 01:00:58,916 THAT'S THE TIME WHEN YOU'VE GOT TO TURN AROUND 1234 01:00:58,959 --> 01:01:01,614 AND LOOK THAT SON OF A BITCH RIGHT BETWEEN THE EYES, 1235 01:01:01,658 --> 01:01:05,226 AND YOU GOT TO TELL HIM THESE WORDS... 1236 01:01:05,270 --> 01:01:08,142 - I STUFF THREE PAIR OF SOCKS AND A BAR OF BEAUTY SOAP 1237 01:01:08,186 --> 01:01:09,883 DOWN IN FRONT OF MY PANTS. 1238 01:01:09,927 --> 01:01:12,886 [rock music] 1239 01:01:12,930 --> 01:01:15,062 ♪ 1240 01:01:15,106 --> 01:01:17,238 - ♪ SHE PAINTED UP 1241 01:01:17,282 --> 01:01:26,421 ♪ HER FACE 1242 01:01:26,465 --> 01:01:28,293 ♪ SHE SAT BEFORE 1243 01:01:28,336 --> 01:01:35,561 ♪ THE MIRROR 1244 01:01:35,604 --> 01:01:37,476 ♪ 1245 01:01:37,519 --> 01:01:39,652 ♪ SHE PAINTED UP 1246 01:01:39,696 --> 01:01:44,788 ♪ HER FACE 1247 01:01:44,831 --> 01:01:47,660 ♪ SHE DREW THE MIRROR 1248 01:01:47,704 --> 01:01:55,929 ♪ NEARER 1249 01:01:55,973 --> 01:01:58,192 ♪ 1250 01:01:58,236 --> 01:02:03,458 - ♪ PRACTICING, PRACTICE, PRACTICING ♪ 1251 01:02:03,502 --> 01:02:10,944 ♪ THE STARE 1252 01:02:10,988 --> 01:02:19,997 - ♪ WHOA, STARE 1253 01:02:20,040 --> 01:02:21,912 ♪ THE SECRET STARE SHE WOULD USE ♪ 1254 01:02:21,955 --> 01:02:26,917 ♪ IF A WORTHY-LOOKING VICTIM SHOULD APPEAR ♪ 1255 01:02:26,960 --> 01:02:30,877 ♪ PE-E-EAR 1256 01:02:30,921 --> 01:02:33,967 ♪ HEY 1257 01:02:34,011 --> 01:02:37,884 ♪ EH EH 1258 01:02:37,928 --> 01:02:42,236 ♪ PRACTICING, PRACTICE, PRACTICING ♪ 1259 01:02:42,280 --> 01:02:45,500 - ♪ OHH 1260 01:02:45,544 --> 01:02:49,853 ♪ OH OH OH OH 1261 01:02:49,896 --> 01:02:56,424 ♪ PRACTICING, PRACTICE, PRACTICING ♪ 1262 01:02:56,468 --> 01:02:59,427 [slow orchestra] 1263 01:02:59,471 --> 01:03:07,392 ♪ 1264 01:04:13,458 --> 01:04:14,415 [rock music] 1265 01:04:14,459 --> 01:04:17,941 ♪ 1266 01:04:17,984 --> 01:04:20,204 - ♪ THE CLOCK UPON 1267 01:04:20,247 --> 01:04:28,821 ♪ THE WALL 1268 01:04:28,865 --> 01:04:29,822 ♪ HAS STRUCK 1269 01:04:29,866 --> 01:04:37,090 ♪ THE MIDNIGHT HOUR 1270 01:04:37,134 --> 01:04:39,353 ♪ 1271 01:04:39,397 --> 01:04:41,486 ♪ SHE FINISHES 1272 01:04:41,529 --> 01:04:46,621 ♪ HER CALL 1273 01:04:46,665 --> 01:04:48,232 ♪ HER GIRLFRIEND'S 1274 01:04:48,275 --> 01:04:55,456 ♪ IN THE SHOWER 1275 01:04:55,500 --> 01:04:59,199 ♪ 1276 01:04:59,243 --> 01:05:07,947 ♪ PRACTICING, PRACTICE, PRACTICING ♪ 1277 01:05:07,991 --> 01:05:10,645 ♪ HALF A DOZEN PROVOCATIVE SQUATS ♪ 1278 01:05:10,689 --> 01:05:12,865 ♪ OUT OF THE SHOWER, SHE SQUEEZES HER SPOTS ♪ 1279 01:05:12,909 --> 01:05:14,388 ♪ BRUSHES HER TEETH 1280 01:05:14,432 --> 01:05:15,912 ♪ SHOOTS A DEODORANT SPRAY 1281 01:05:15,955 --> 01:05:23,136 ♪ UP HER TWAT 1282 01:05:23,180 --> 01:05:25,965 ♪ IT'S GETTING HER 1283 01:05:26,009 --> 01:05:28,141 ♪ GETTING HER 1284 01:05:28,185 --> 01:05:30,927 ♪ HOT 1285 01:05:30,970 --> 01:05:34,669 ♪ OOH OOH OOH OOH OOH OOH 1286 01:05:34,713 --> 01:05:38,369 ♪ SHE'S JUST 24 1287 01:05:38,412 --> 01:05:42,547 ♪ AND SHE CAN'T GET OFF 1288 01:05:42,590 --> 01:05:48,118 ♪ A SAD BUT TYPICAL CASE 1289 01:05:48,161 --> 01:05:49,902 ♪ YEAH 1290 01:05:49,946 --> 01:05:52,774 ♪ THE LAST DUDE TO DO HER 1291 01:05:52,818 --> 01:05:55,995 ♪ GOT IN AND GOT SOFT 1292 01:05:56,039 --> 01:05:57,997 ♪ SHE BLEW IT 1293 01:05:58,041 --> 01:06:01,914 ♪ AND LAUGHED IN HIS FACE 1294 01:06:01,958 --> 01:06:03,089 ♪ YEAH 1295 01:06:03,133 --> 01:06:06,832 ♪ FACE, YEAH 1296 01:06:06,875 --> 01:06:11,924 ♪ YEAH 1297 01:06:11,968 --> 01:06:14,927 [atonal orchestral music] 1298 01:06:14,971 --> 01:06:22,891 ♪ 1299 01:07:36,574 --> 01:07:41,013 [rock music] 1300 01:07:41,057 --> 01:07:43,015 - ♪ SHE CHOOSES ALL 1301 01:07:43,059 --> 01:07:51,806 ♪ THE CLOTHES 1302 01:07:51,850 --> 01:07:54,026 ♪ SHE'LL WEAR TONIGHT 1303 01:07:54,070 --> 01:08:01,294 ♪ TO DANCE IN 1304 01:08:01,338 --> 01:08:03,079 ♪ 1305 01:08:03,122 --> 01:08:04,558 ♪ THE PLACES THAT 1306 01:08:04,602 --> 01:08:10,086 ♪ SHE GOES 1307 01:08:10,129 --> 01:08:13,045 ♪ ARE FILLED WITH GUYS FROM GROUPS ♪ 1308 01:08:13,089 --> 01:08:14,177 - ♪ YEAH, YEAH, YEAH 1309 01:08:14,220 --> 01:08:16,179 - ♪ WAITING FOR A CHANCE 1310 01:08:16,222 --> 01:08:20,792 ♪ TO BREAK HER PANTS IN 1311 01:08:20,835 --> 01:08:23,273 ♪ 1312 01:08:23,316 --> 01:08:28,582 ♪ PROVOCATIVE SQUATS 1313 01:08:28,626 --> 01:08:30,454 ♪ DA DA DA DA DA DA 1314 01:08:30,497 --> 01:08:32,064 ♪ PROVOCATIVE SQUATS 1315 01:08:32,108 --> 01:08:33,848 ♪ LA LA LA LA LA LA 1316 01:08:33,892 --> 01:08:35,589 ♪ PROVOCATIVE SQUATS 1317 01:08:35,633 --> 01:08:38,592 ♪ DA LA LA LA LA 1318 01:08:38,636 --> 01:08:42,944 ♪ LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA 1319 01:08:42,988 --> 01:08:45,338 ♪ LA LA LA LA LA LA ♪ 1320 01:08:45,382 --> 01:08:48,602 ♪ WELL, AT LEAST THERE'S 1321 01:08:48,646 --> 01:08:54,956 ♪ SORT OF A CHOICE THERE 1322 01:08:55,000 --> 01:09:02,877 ♪ 20 OR 30 AT TIMES THERE HAVE BEEN ♪ 1323 01:09:02,921 --> 01:09:10,885 ♪ SOMEWHAT DESIRABLE BOYS THERE ♪ 1324 01:09:10,929 --> 01:09:14,367 ♪ DRESSED REALLY SPIFFY 1325 01:09:14,411 --> 01:09:18,502 ♪ WITH LONG HAIR 1326 01:09:18,545 --> 01:09:21,461 ♪ WAITING FOR GIRLS 1327 01:09:21,505 --> 01:09:26,597 ♪ THEY CAN SHOVE IT RIGHT IN 1328 01:09:26,640 --> 01:09:30,340 ♪ LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA ♪ 1329 01:09:30,383 --> 01:09:32,951 ♪ LA LA LA LA LA LA 1330 01:09:32,994 --> 01:09:35,475 ♪ WELL, AT LEAST 1331 01:09:35,519 --> 01:09:41,438 ♪ THERE'S SORT OF A CHOICE THERE ♪ 1332 01:09:41,481 --> 01:09:46,138 ♪ 20 OR 30 AT TIMES 1333 01:09:46,182 --> 01:09:48,662 ♪ THERE HAVE BEEN 1334 01:09:48,706 --> 01:09:55,930 ♪ SOMEWHAT DESIRABLE BOYS THERE ♪ 1335 01:09:55,974 --> 01:09:58,977 ♪ DRESSED REALLY SPIFFY 1336 01:09:59,020 --> 01:10:02,676 ♪ WITH LONG HAIR 1337 01:10:02,720 --> 01:10:06,158 ♪ WAITING FOR GIRLS 1338 01:10:06,202 --> 01:10:08,943 ♪ THEY CAN SHOVE IT 1339 01:10:08,987 --> 01:10:12,904 ♪ RIGHT IN 1340 01:10:16,212 --> 01:10:17,952 - HELLO THERE. 1341 01:10:17,996 --> 01:10:20,694 ALL THE GUYS IN THE BAND ARE PRETENDING TO GET READY 1342 01:10:20,738 --> 01:10:23,306 SO THEY CAN GO OUT AND FIND SOME PUSSY. 1343 01:10:23,349 --> 01:10:26,570 - OH, I WONDER WHERE THE ACTION IS IN THIS TOWN? 1344 01:10:26,613 --> 01:10:29,442 - EVERY MUSICIAN LIKES TO FIND SOME PUSSY. 1345 01:10:29,486 --> 01:10:32,967 - BOY, I COULD HAVE REALLY SCORED LAST NIGHT. 1346 01:10:33,011 --> 01:10:35,492 BUT EVERY NIGHT, IT'S THE SAME THING: 1347 01:10:35,535 --> 01:10:38,364 AYNSLEY GETS THERE FIRST. 1348 01:10:38,408 --> 01:10:40,192 HE'S SO FAST, IT... 1349 01:10:40,236 --> 01:10:42,977 MUST BE FROM PLAYING THE DRUMS OR SOMETHING. 1350 01:10:43,021 --> 01:10:44,588 I MEAN... 1351 01:10:44,631 --> 01:10:46,242 IF THOSE GIRLS OVER THERE 1352 01:10:46,285 --> 01:10:48,983 ONLY KNEW MY SECRET IDENTITY, BUT... 1353 01:10:49,027 --> 01:10:50,507 BUT HOW COULD THEY? 1354 01:10:50,550 --> 01:10:52,987 HO-HOW COULD THEY KNOW THAT... 1355 01:10:53,031 --> 01:10:56,077 I AM BWANA DIK? 1356 01:10:56,121 --> 01:10:58,993 - WHERE'S MY HAIR DRYER? 1357 01:10:59,037 --> 01:11:01,344 GOT TO LOOK LOVELY FOR THE GIRLS. 1358 01:11:01,387 --> 01:11:02,736 [hair dryer whirring] 1359 01:11:02,780 --> 01:11:04,999 AFTER ALL... 1360 01:11:05,043 --> 01:11:07,611 I AM BWANA DIK. 1361 01:11:07,654 --> 01:11:10,004 - EACH GUY HAS HIS OWN SPECIALTY 1362 01:11:10,048 --> 01:11:13,051 FOR GETTING THE GIRL OF HIS DREAMS. 1363 01:11:13,094 --> 01:11:15,445 - I SPRAYED MY PITS. 1364 01:11:15,488 --> 01:11:17,751 I PUT ON A NEW TIE-DYE T-SHIRT. 1365 01:11:17,795 --> 01:11:20,145 I BRUSHED MY TEETH. 1366 01:11:20,188 --> 01:11:22,800 - I CLEANED MY GLASSES. 1367 01:11:22,843 --> 01:11:25,193 - I BUFFED MY NAILS. 1368 01:11:25,237 --> 01:11:26,891 - I BOUGHT A COPY OF DOWN BEAT 1369 01:11:26,934 --> 01:11:28,327 SO I COULD CARRY IT AROUND 1370 01:11:28,371 --> 01:11:29,850 AND LOOK LIKE I KNEW WHAT WAS HAPPENING. 1371 01:11:29,894 --> 01:11:32,940 - I LEFT MY SHIRT UNBUTTONED AT THE TOP. 1372 01:11:32,984 --> 01:11:35,856 - I JUST KNOW I'M GONNA GET LAID TONIGHT. 1373 01:11:35,900 --> 01:11:38,729 I'M NOT TAKING ANY CHANCES. [jingling] 1374 01:11:38,772 --> 01:11:42,036 I GOT THIS LITTLE JAR OF TINSEL GLITTER HERE. 1375 01:11:42,080 --> 01:11:44,474 THE SAME BRAND DANNY HUTTON PUTS ON HIS FACE 1376 01:11:44,517 --> 01:11:46,389 THAT MAKES HIM LOOK ALL... 1377 01:11:46,432 --> 01:11:48,782 GLISTENING AND SEDUCTIVE. 1378 01:11:48,826 --> 01:11:49,783 [jingling] 1379 01:11:49,827 --> 01:11:51,524 JUST PUT A LITTLE ON HERE. 1380 01:11:51,568 --> 01:11:53,526 THE CHEEKS... 1381 01:11:53,570 --> 01:11:55,049 THE CHIN... 1382 01:11:55,093 --> 01:11:58,052 MMM, THE QUIVERING LIPS... 1383 01:11:58,096 --> 01:12:00,054 I'M SO COMMERCIAL, I COULD DIE! 1384 01:12:00,098 --> 01:12:01,534 SOMEBODY... 1385 01:12:01,578 --> 01:12:03,536 TURN ON A BLUE SPOTLIGHT! 1386 01:12:03,580 --> 01:12:05,321 [bird chirping, guitar strumming] 1387 01:12:05,364 --> 01:12:08,541 - ♪ WHAT 1388 01:12:08,585 --> 01:12:14,373 ♪ WILL THIS 1389 01:12:14,417 --> 01:12:22,250 ♪ MORNING 1390 01:12:22,294 --> 01:12:23,948 ♪ BRING ME 1391 01:12:23,991 --> 01:12:31,085 ♪ THIS EVENING? 1392 01:12:31,129 --> 01:12:33,697 ♪ SOME LOCAL 1393 01:12:33,740 --> 01:12:37,918 ♪ HOT ACTION 1394 01:12:37,962 --> 01:12:41,357 - ♪ I'M A YOUNG LONELY GUY 1395 01:12:41,400 --> 01:12:49,234 - ♪ BEFORE WE ARE LEAVING 1396 01:12:49,277 --> 01:12:54,587 - ♪ MAYBE WE CAN GET SOME HEAD ♪ 1397 01:12:54,631 --> 01:12:56,023 - ♪ GO TO THE CLUB OR THE BAR ♪ 1398 01:12:56,067 --> 01:12:57,764 ♪ OR WHEREVER THE PUSSY IS FOUND ♪ 1399 01:12:57,808 --> 01:13:01,420 ♪ IN THE TOWN YOUR BAND IS BOOKED TO PLAY IN ♪ 1400 01:13:01,464 --> 01:13:04,249 ♪ 1401 01:13:04,292 --> 01:13:06,599 ♪ IT'S ALWAYS A LITTLE BIT HARDER TO SCORE ♪ 1402 01:13:06,643 --> 01:13:08,732 ♪ IF IT'S JUST YOUR FIRST TIME IN A TOWN ♪ 1403 01:13:08,775 --> 01:13:11,169 ♪ YOU NEVER HIT BEFORE 1404 01:13:11,212 --> 01:13:13,214 ♪ 1405 01:13:13,258 --> 01:13:16,217 [cheers and applause] 1406 01:13:16,261 --> 01:13:17,741 [laughter and shouts] 1407 01:13:17,784 --> 01:13:20,961 - ♪ STAYED IN IT ONCE 1408 01:13:21,005 --> 01:13:25,270 ♪ AND GOT LAID 1409 01:13:25,313 --> 01:13:28,534 ♪ YOU'VE GOT IT MADE 1410 01:13:28,578 --> 01:13:32,625 ♪ AHH, GOT IT MADE 1411 01:13:32,669 --> 01:13:35,106 ♪ OHH 1412 01:13:35,149 --> 01:13:37,935 ♪ JUST YOUR FIRST TIME 1413 01:13:37,978 --> 01:13:43,419 ♪ THEN YOU KNOW IT'S NO FUN TO GO ♪ 1414 01:13:43,462 --> 01:13:48,772 ♪ BACK TO A PLASTIC HOTEL 1415 01:13:48,815 --> 01:13:53,472 ♪ ALL ALONE 1416 01:13:53,516 --> 01:13:55,169 ♪ GO TO THE CLUB OR THE BAR 1417 01:13:55,213 --> 01:13:56,649 ♪ GO TO THE CLUB OR THE BAR ♪ 1418 01:13:56,693 --> 01:13:58,085 ♪ GO TO THE CLUB OR THE BAR 1419 01:13:58,129 --> 01:14:01,262 ♪ OR WHEREVER THE PUSSY IS FOUND ♪ 1420 01:14:01,306 --> 01:14:03,439 [bassoon blowing] 1421 01:14:03,482 --> 01:14:05,615 [trumpet blows Call To Post] 1422 01:14:05,658 --> 01:14:07,443 - HAH! - HYUH! 1423 01:14:07,486 --> 01:14:08,879 - AGH! - HYUH! 1424 01:14:08,922 --> 01:14:10,620 announcer: ONE MINUTE TO POST TIME. 1425 01:14:10,663 --> 01:14:11,664 APPROACHING THE GATE. 1426 01:14:11,708 --> 01:14:13,405 THERE'S THE CALL... 1427 01:14:13,449 --> 01:14:16,321 - HAH! - NONE MAY RESIST ME. 1428 01:14:16,364 --> 01:14:17,409 announcer: THEY'RE MOVING INTO THE GATE. 1429 01:14:17,453 --> 01:14:18,410 - THREE CHEESEBURGERS. 1430 01:14:18,454 --> 01:14:20,238 - [barking] 1431 01:14:20,281 --> 01:14:22,066 - WOW. BOY, DO I NEED IT! 1432 01:14:22,109 --> 01:14:25,112 [bell dings, crowd cheers] 1433 01:14:25,156 --> 01:14:27,245 [indistinct track announcer] 1434 01:14:27,288 --> 01:14:28,507 all: OPEN UP! 1435 01:14:28,551 --> 01:14:30,204 OPEN! OPEN UP! 1436 01:14:30,248 --> 01:14:32,206 HEY, OPEN UP! - OPEN THE DOOR! 1437 01:14:32,250 --> 01:14:33,425 [all shouting] 1438 01:14:33,469 --> 01:14:35,209 - WOMEN! BOOZE! 1439 01:14:35,253 --> 01:14:38,212 OPEN UP! I'M NOT STALLING! 1440 01:14:38,256 --> 01:14:40,954 [overlapping shouts] 1441 01:14:40,998 --> 01:14:42,521 - COME ON, YOU GUYS, GET OUT OF MY WAY! 1442 01:14:42,565 --> 01:14:44,828 [overlapping shouts] 1443 01:14:44,871 --> 01:14:46,960 - ♪ SHE'S SUCH A DIGNIFIED LADY ♪ 1444 01:14:47,004 --> 01:14:49,049 ♪ SHE'S SO PRETTY AND SOFT 1445 01:14:49,093 --> 01:14:51,356 ♪ YOU CAN'T CALL HER A GROUPIE 1446 01:14:51,399 --> 01:14:53,445 ♪ IT JUST PISSES HER OFF 1447 01:14:53,489 --> 01:14:55,578 ♪ SHE'S GOT DIAMONDS AND JEWELRY ♪ 1448 01:14:55,621 --> 01:14:57,667 ♪ SHE GOT LOTS OF NEW CLOTHES 1449 01:14:57,710 --> 01:14:59,930 ♪ SHE AIN'T HURTIN' FOR MONEY ♪ 1450 01:14:59,973 --> 01:15:01,758 ♪ SO THAT EVERYONE KNOWS 1451 01:15:01,801 --> 01:15:06,676 ♪ THAT SHE KNOWS WHAT SHE WANTS ♪ 1452 01:15:06,719 --> 01:15:10,636 ♪ SHE KNOWS WHAT SHE LIKES 1453 01:15:10,680 --> 01:15:13,596 ♪ DADDY, DADDY, DADDY, WANNA DO IT? ♪ 1454 01:15:13,639 --> 01:15:15,119 ♪ WHOO 1455 01:15:15,162 --> 01:15:16,990 ♪ DADDY, DADDY, DADDY, WANNA DO IT? ♪ 1456 01:15:17,034 --> 01:15:18,992 ♪ WHOO 1457 01:15:19,036 --> 01:15:21,560 ♪ DADDY, DADDY, DADDY, WANNA DO IT? ♪ 1458 01:15:21,604 --> 01:15:26,260 ♪ LOOK OUT, SHE'S GOT HER EYES ON YOU ♪ 1459 01:15:26,304 --> 01:15:29,307 ♪ SHE LEFT HER PLACE AFTER MIDNIGHT ♪ 1460 01:15:29,350 --> 01:15:31,527 ♪ LA LA LA LA LA 1461 01:15:31,570 --> 01:15:33,703 ♪ AND SHE DROVE TO THE CLUB 1462 01:15:33,746 --> 01:15:35,269 ♪ LA LA LA LA-EE-AH 1463 01:15:35,313 --> 01:15:38,185 ♪ YOU KNOW THAT HER AND HER PARTNER ♪ 1464 01:15:38,229 --> 01:15:39,578 ♪ LA LA LA LA LA 1465 01:15:39,622 --> 01:15:42,276 ♪ CAME HERE LOOKIN' FOR LOVE 1466 01:15:42,320 --> 01:15:43,713 ♪ LA LA LA LA-EE-AH 1467 01:15:43,756 --> 01:15:46,716 ♪ THEY WANT A GUY FROM A GROUP ♪ 1468 01:15:46,759 --> 01:15:48,282 ♪ LA LA LA LA LA 1469 01:15:48,326 --> 01:15:50,850 ♪ GOT A THING IN THE CHARTS 1470 01:15:50,894 --> 01:15:52,635 ♪ LA LA LA LA-EE-AH 1471 01:15:52,678 --> 01:15:56,421 ♪ IF HIS DICK IS A MONSTER 1472 01:15:56,464 --> 01:16:00,730 ♪ IF HIS DICK IS A MONSTER ♪ 1473 01:16:00,773 --> 01:16:04,429 ♪ IF HIS DICK IS A MONSTER 1474 01:16:04,472 --> 01:16:08,520 ♪ THEY WILL GIVE HIM THEIR HEARTS ♪ 1475 01:16:08,564 --> 01:16:10,609 ♪ 'CAUSE THEY KNOW WHAT THEY WANT ♪ 1476 01:16:10,653 --> 01:16:13,351 ♪ WANNA DO IT, DO IT, THEY WANNA, WANNA DO IT ♪ 1477 01:16:13,394 --> 01:16:15,309 ♪ THEY KNOW WHAT THEY LIKE 1478 01:16:15,353 --> 01:16:17,268 ♪ WANNA DO IT, DO IT, THEY WANNA, WANNA DO IT ♪ 1479 01:16:17,311 --> 01:16:19,662 ♪ DADDY, DADDY, DADDY, WANNA DO IT ♪ 1480 01:16:19,705 --> 01:16:21,402 ♪ WHOO 1481 01:16:21,446 --> 01:16:23,970 ♪ DADDY, DADDY, DADDY, WANNA DO IT ♪ 1482 01:16:24,014 --> 01:16:25,493 ♪ WHOO 1483 01:16:25,537 --> 01:16:28,279 ♪ DADDY, DADDY, DADDY, WANNA DO IT ♪ 1484 01:16:28,322 --> 01:16:32,022 ♪ LOOK OUT, THEY GOT THEIR EYES ON YOU ♪ 1485 01:16:32,065 --> 01:16:33,806 ♪ BAM, BAM, YA TA DA DA 1486 01:16:33,850 --> 01:16:36,722 ♪ THEY KNOW WHAT THEY WANT 1487 01:16:36,766 --> 01:16:37,941 ♪ WHOO 1488 01:16:37,984 --> 01:16:40,726 ♪ KNOW WHAT THEY LIKE 1489 01:16:40,770 --> 01:16:42,162 ♪ WHOO 1490 01:16:42,206 --> 01:16:44,817 ♪ DADDY, DADDY, DADDY 1491 01:16:44,861 --> 01:16:46,471 ♪ WHOO 1492 01:16:46,514 --> 01:16:48,647 ♪ DADDY, DADDY, DADDY 1493 01:16:48,691 --> 01:16:50,301 ♪ WHOO 1494 01:16:50,344 --> 01:16:52,346 ♪ DADDY, DADDY, DADDY 1495 01:16:52,390 --> 01:16:53,870 ♪ ALL RIGHT 1496 01:16:53,913 --> 01:16:56,524 ♪ YOU GOT 'EM SCREAMIN' ALL NIGHT ♪ 1497 01:16:56,568 --> 01:16:58,788 ♪ LA LA LA LA LA 1498 01:16:58,831 --> 01:17:00,877 ♪ SCREAMIN' ALL NIGHT 1499 01:17:00,920 --> 01:17:02,705 [indistinct chatter] 1500 01:17:02,748 --> 01:17:05,359 ♪ OOH OOH OOH 1501 01:17:05,403 --> 01:17:07,535 ♪ DO YOU LIKE MY NEW CAR? 1502 01:17:07,579 --> 01:17:11,365 ♪ DO IT, DO IT, YOU WANNA, WANNA DO IT, DO IT ♪ 1503 01:17:11,409 --> 01:17:13,846 ♪ OOH OOH OOH 1504 01:17:13,890 --> 01:17:16,196 ♪ DO YOU LIKE MY NEW CAR ♪ 1505 01:17:16,240 --> 01:17:20,200 ♪ DO IT, YOU WANNA, WANNA, DO IT, DO IT? ♪ 1506 01:17:20,244 --> 01:17:22,376 ♪ OOH OOH OOH 1507 01:17:22,420 --> 01:17:24,596 ♪ DO YOU LIKE MY NEW CAR? 1508 01:17:24,640 --> 01:17:27,817 ♪ DO IT, YOU WANNA, WANNA, DO IT, DO IT? ♪ 1509 01:17:27,860 --> 01:17:30,689 ♪ OOH OOH OOH 1510 01:17:30,733 --> 01:17:32,430 ♪ DO YOU LIKE MY NEW CAR? 1511 01:17:32,473 --> 01:17:36,042 ♪ DO IT, DO IT, YOU WANNA, WANNA, DO IT, DO IT? ♪ 1512 01:17:36,086 --> 01:17:38,871 ♪ OOH OOH OOH 1513 01:17:38,915 --> 01:17:40,743 ♪ DO YOU LIKE MY NEW CAR? 1514 01:17:40,786 --> 01:17:44,703 ♪ DO IT, DO IT, YOU WANNA, WANNA, DO IT, DO IT? ♪ 1515 01:17:44,747 --> 01:17:47,184 ♪ OOH OOH OOH 1516 01:17:47,227 --> 01:17:48,968 ♪ DO YOU LIKE MY NEW CAR? 1517 01:17:49,012 --> 01:17:52,842 ♪ DO IT, DO IT, YOU WANNA, WANNA, DO IT, DO IT? ♪ 1518 01:17:52,885 --> 01:17:55,671 ♪ OOH OOH OOH 1519 01:17:55,714 --> 01:17:57,411 ♪ DO YOU LIKE MY NEW CAR? 1520 01:17:57,455 --> 01:18:00,414 ♪ DO IT, DO IT, YOU WANNA, WANNA, DO IT, DO IT? ♪ 1521 01:18:00,458 --> 01:18:01,677 ♪ OHH 1522 01:18:01,720 --> 01:18:03,853 ♪ OOH OOH OOH 1523 01:18:03,896 --> 01:18:05,681 ♪ DO YOU LIKE MY NEW CAR? 1524 01:18:05,724 --> 01:18:08,727 ♪ DO IT, DO IT, YOU WANNA, WANNA, DO IT, DO IT? ♪ 1525 01:18:08,771 --> 01:18:10,642 ♪ OOH HOO 1526 01:18:10,686 --> 01:18:13,384 [bubbling] 1527 01:18:26,005 --> 01:18:28,660 - OH, WOW, WHAT A NIGHT. 1528 01:18:31,924 --> 01:18:34,231 WHAT'S THE MATTER, DIDN'T YOU GET ANY ACTION TONIGHT? 1529 01:18:34,274 --> 01:18:36,668 - DIDN'T YOU USED TO BE WITH THE MOTHERS? 1530 01:18:36,712 --> 01:18:38,322 - YEAH. 1531 01:18:38,365 --> 01:18:39,889 - IS THIS WHAT YOU DO NOW? 1532 01:18:39,932 --> 01:18:42,456 - I'VE GOT MY OWN GROUP, TOO. 1533 01:18:42,500 --> 01:18:44,937 I DON'T MIND BEING IN THIS MOVIE. 1534 01:18:44,981 --> 01:18:48,158 I GET A CHANCE TO TRANSFORM A FEW TIMES, 1535 01:18:48,201 --> 01:18:50,900 DRINK THESE VILE, FOAMY LIQUIDS. 1536 01:18:50,943 --> 01:18:51,901 - UGH. 1537 01:18:51,944 --> 01:18:52,902 - [chuckles] 1538 01:18:52,945 --> 01:18:55,208 MMM... [bubbling] 1539 01:18:56,732 --> 01:19:00,213 [grunting] 1540 01:19:00,257 --> 01:19:02,476 - [scoffs] WHAT KIND OF A LIFE IS THAT? 1541 01:19:02,520 --> 01:19:04,217 - IT'S NOT THAT BAD. 1542 01:19:04,261 --> 01:19:07,873 REALLY, I LIKE TO BE A MONSTER EVERY ONCE IN AWHILE. 1543 01:19:07,917 --> 01:19:11,224 - NO ONE WILL EVER TAKE YOU SERIOUSLY AFTER THIS. 1544 01:19:11,268 --> 01:19:13,792 - WHY, BECAUSE I TRANSFORM? 1545 01:19:13,836 --> 01:19:15,968 I LIKE TO BE A MONSTER! 1546 01:19:16,012 --> 01:19:19,537 THERE'S A LITTLE MONSTER IN EVERY ONE OF US. 1547 01:19:19,580 --> 01:19:21,234 - YOU'LL PROBABLY STAY HERE FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE 1548 01:19:21,278 --> 01:19:24,150 WITH YOUR FAKE POTIONS AND YOUR TWISTED MONSTER FACE. 1549 01:19:24,194 --> 01:19:25,761 - UHH! 1550 01:19:25,804 --> 01:19:27,632 - YOU COULD HAVE BEEN SOMETHING IN ROCK AND ROLL. 1551 01:19:27,675 --> 01:19:31,201 - I TRIED TO GET A HIT SINGLE. 1552 01:19:31,244 --> 01:19:32,942 IT DROVE ME TO DRINK. 1553 01:19:32,985 --> 01:19:34,291 [bubbling] 1554 01:19:34,334 --> 01:19:36,510 - UGH...OHH... 1555 01:19:36,554 --> 01:19:37,555 - [cackling] 1556 01:19:37,598 --> 01:19:39,470 - GO ON, LAUGH ABOUT IT. 1557 01:19:39,513 --> 01:19:40,950 YOU COULD HAVE BEEN A STAR. 1558 01:19:40,993 --> 01:19:42,429 YOU COULD HAVE SPREAD YOUR AURA ACROSS 1559 01:19:42,473 --> 01:19:44,475 VAST CONTINENTAL AREAS, 1560 01:19:44,518 --> 01:19:47,608 YOUR NAME ON MILLIONS OF SMALL, HOT LIPS, 1561 01:19:47,652 --> 01:19:49,741 WHISPERING UNDER SECURE, PINK BLANKETS 1562 01:19:49,785 --> 01:19:51,961 IN THE LONELY MIDNIGHT DARK. 1563 01:19:52,004 --> 01:19:53,310 BUT WHADDYA DO? 1564 01:19:53,353 --> 01:19:55,268 YA JOIN THE MOTHERS, 1565 01:19:55,312 --> 01:19:57,531 AND YA END UP WORKING FOR ZAPPA, 1566 01:19:57,575 --> 01:19:59,751 AND HE MAKES YOU BE A CREEP. 1567 01:19:59,795 --> 01:20:02,754 YOU COULDA PLAYED THE BLUES WITH JOHN MAYALL 1568 01:20:02,798 --> 01:20:06,845 OR FAR-OUT EXCITING JAZZ WITH BLOOD, SWEAT AND TEARS. 1569 01:20:06,889 --> 01:20:08,673 - YOU REALLY THINK SO? 1570 01:20:08,716 --> 01:20:12,503 - LOOK, NO ONE WILL EVER TAKE YOU SERIOUSLY AFTER THIS. 1571 01:20:12,546 --> 01:20:14,592 HOW CAN THEY TAKE YOU SERIOUSLY? 1572 01:20:14,635 --> 01:20:17,856 IN THIS BUSINESS YOU EITHER GOT TO PLAY THE BLUES 1573 01:20:17,900 --> 01:20:22,252 OR SING WITH A HIGH VOICE. 1574 01:20:22,295 --> 01:20:24,254 - YOU'RE RIGHT. 1575 01:20:24,297 --> 01:20:27,039 I NEVER SHOULD HAVE JOINED THE MOTHERS. 1576 01:20:27,083 --> 01:20:30,608 WHY, I COULD BE A STAR NOW! 1577 01:20:30,651 --> 01:20:34,307 OH, WHEN I THINK OF ALL THOSE MILLIONS OF... 1578 01:20:34,351 --> 01:20:37,006 - HEY... - HOT, PINK, JUICY LITTLE... 1579 01:20:37,049 --> 01:20:38,877 - HEY. LISTEN. 1580 01:20:38,921 --> 01:20:40,183 DO YOU KNOW WHERE I CAN, UH, 1581 01:20:40,226 --> 01:20:42,185 GET ANY DOPE IN THIS IMAGINARY TOWN? 1582 01:20:42,228 --> 01:20:45,057 - MAN, THERE'S NO DOPE IN THIS TOWN. 1583 01:20:45,101 --> 01:20:47,799 JUST THESE VILE, FOAMY LIQUIDS. 1584 01:20:47,843 --> 01:20:49,279 - WELL, THEY'RE FAKE AREN'T THEY? 1585 01:20:49,322 --> 01:20:52,282 - NO, THEY'RE REAL! 1586 01:20:52,325 --> 01:20:54,632 I MIX THEM MYSELF AT HOME, 1587 01:20:54,675 --> 01:20:57,330 THEN I BRING THEM IN THE MORNING... 1588 01:20:57,374 --> 01:21:00,290 SECRET SPIRITUAL FORMULAS. 1589 01:21:00,333 --> 01:21:03,684 - EW, WHAT'S A SECRET SPIRITUAL FORMULA WHEN IT'S OUT? 1590 01:21:03,728 --> 01:21:05,817 - THE STUFF THAT GOES IN THE ELIXIR, 1591 01:21:05,861 --> 01:21:08,602 THE POTION, WHATEVER I MIX 1592 01:21:08,646 --> 01:21:10,648 IS IRRELEVANT TO THE RESULT. 1593 01:21:10,691 --> 01:21:12,955 - YOU MEAN THEY'RE FAKE POTIONS, RIGHT? 1594 01:21:12,998 --> 01:21:17,089 - LOOK, IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT'S IN THE MIX. 1595 01:21:17,133 --> 01:21:19,613 IT'S THE LIQUID! 1596 01:21:19,657 --> 01:21:22,094 THE CONCEPT OF THE LIQUID 1597 01:21:22,138 --> 01:21:27,317 IS ENOUGH TO TRIGGER A SPECIAL COSMIC AWARE STATE. 1598 01:21:27,360 --> 01:21:28,971 [splurt] 1599 01:21:29,014 --> 01:21:33,062 IT'S BECAUSE I'M SO SPIRITUALLY EVOLVED... 1600 01:21:33,105 --> 01:21:35,064 - OH, LISTEN, I JUST WANNA GET OUT OF IT 1601 01:21:35,107 --> 01:21:36,761 AND GO BACK TO ME FAKE MOTEL ROOM 1602 01:21:36,804 --> 01:21:38,284 AND PLAY THE BLUES, YOU KNOW. 1603 01:21:38,328 --> 01:21:40,983 FUCK YOUR SPIRITUAL EVOLVEMENT. 1604 01:21:41,026 --> 01:21:43,637 ANYWAY, WHAT HAPPENS IF A NEW AND EXCITING 1605 01:21:43,681 --> 01:21:46,292 BLUES TALENT SUCH AS MESELF DRINKS YOUR STUFF? 1606 01:21:46,336 --> 01:21:48,729 - HERE, TAKE THIS BACK TO YOUR FAKE ROOM. 1607 01:21:48,773 --> 01:21:49,861 DRINK IT. 1608 01:21:49,905 --> 01:21:51,384 - I'D FEEL A LOT HAPPIER 1609 01:21:51,428 --> 01:21:54,083 IF THERE WAS SOMETHING I COULD SMOKE. 1610 01:21:54,126 --> 01:21:56,999 - WELL...HERE. 1611 01:21:57,042 --> 01:21:58,391 DIP THIS IN IT. 1612 01:21:58,435 --> 01:22:00,480 NOW, LET IT DRY OUT. 1613 01:22:00,524 --> 01:22:03,701 THAT OUGHT TO GET YOU A LITTLE HIGH. 1614 01:22:03,744 --> 01:22:05,311 OR SOMETHING. 1615 01:22:05,355 --> 01:22:07,531 - OOH, I CAN'T TAKE YOU SERIOUSLY. 1616 01:22:07,574 --> 01:22:09,446 - LOOK, YOU MIGHT AS WELL TAKE THIS TOO. 1617 01:22:11,709 --> 01:22:12,971 - [sniffs] 1618 01:22:14,190 --> 01:22:16,888 - I KNOW IT'S ONLY FAKE STUFF. 1619 01:22:16,932 --> 01:22:20,587 WELL, LISTEN...WE SHOULD GET TOGETHER SOMETIME. 1620 01:22:20,631 --> 01:22:21,675 HAVE A JAM. 1621 01:22:21,719 --> 01:22:23,112 HEY, PLAY SOME BLUES. 1622 01:22:23,155 --> 01:22:25,984 [phone ringing] EXTENSIONS. 1623 01:22:26,028 --> 01:22:28,682 WHAT ABOUT SOME EXTENDED BLUES LICKS? 1624 01:22:28,726 --> 01:22:31,685 [echoing] WHITE PEOPLE CAN PLAY THE BLUES, YOU KNOW. 1625 01:22:31,729 --> 01:22:34,775 [strange blooping and whirring] 1626 01:22:34,819 --> 01:22:36,516 - HELLO! 1627 01:22:36,560 --> 01:22:38,736 OH, FRANK. 1628 01:22:38,779 --> 01:22:41,217 YEAH, I GAVE IT TO HIM. 1629 01:22:41,260 --> 01:22:44,916 YEAH, HE WENT BACK TO THE SPECIAL ROOM. 1630 01:22:44,960 --> 01:22:47,875 [grunts] 1631 01:22:47,919 --> 01:22:51,140 NO, NO. HE'S GONNA SMOKE IT. 1632 01:22:51,183 --> 01:22:52,924 YEAH, RIGHT. 1633 01:22:52,968 --> 01:22:55,405 HEY, LISTEN. 1634 01:22:55,448 --> 01:22:59,061 YOU GOT ANY IDEA WHEN WE'RE GONNA GET PAID FOR THIS? 1635 01:23:00,976 --> 01:23:02,716 [boom] 1636 01:23:02,760 --> 01:23:06,720 [rock music] 1637 01:23:06,764 --> 01:23:09,114 - ♪ WHAT WILL I SAY THE NEXT DAY ♪ 1638 01:23:09,158 --> 01:23:14,902 ♪ TO WHATEVER I DRAG TO MY HOTEL TONIGHT? ♪ 1639 01:23:14,946 --> 01:23:19,298 ♪ IF THINGS GO ALL RIGHT 1640 01:23:19,342 --> 01:23:20,952 ♪ WHAT WILL I SAY 1641 01:23:20,996 --> 01:23:23,215 ♪ THE NEXT DAY TO WHATEVER 1642 01:23:23,259 --> 01:23:27,176 ♪ I DRAG TO MY HOTEL TONIGHT? 1643 01:23:27,219 --> 01:23:31,963 ♪ WILL SHE BE OUT OF SIGHT? 1644 01:23:32,007 --> 01:23:33,965 ♪ WHAT WILL THIS EVENING 1645 01:23:34,009 --> 01:23:36,054 ♪ BRING ME THIS MORNING? 1646 01:23:36,098 --> 01:23:37,969 ♪ WHAT WILL THIS EVENING 1647 01:23:38,013 --> 01:23:40,189 ♪ BRING ME THIS MORNING? 1648 01:23:40,232 --> 01:23:42,104 ♪ A SUCCULENT FAT ONE 1649 01:23:42,147 --> 01:23:44,193 ♪ A MOD LITTLE FLAT ONE 1650 01:23:44,236 --> 01:23:48,501 ♪ MAYBE A HOT ONE TO GIVE ME THE CLAP ♪ 1651 01:23:48,545 --> 01:23:53,115 ♪ MAYBE A FREAK WHO GETS OFF WITH A STRAP ♪ 1652 01:23:53,158 --> 01:23:56,466 ♪ WHAT WILL I SAY THE NEXT DAY TO WHATEVER ♪ 1653 01:23:56,509 --> 01:24:00,557 ♪ I DRAG TO MY HOTEL TONIGHT 1654 01:24:00,600 --> 01:24:05,518 ♪ HOTEL TONIGHT 1655 01:24:05,562 --> 01:24:08,782 ♪ WHAT WILL I SAY THE NEXT DAY TO WHATEVER ♪ 1656 01:24:08,826 --> 01:24:13,178 ♪ I DRAG TO MY HOTEL TONIGHT? 1657 01:24:13,222 --> 01:24:17,748 ♪ WILL SHE BE OUT OF SIGHT? 1658 01:24:17,791 --> 01:24:21,186 ♪ WHAT WILL I SAY THE NEXT DAY TO WHATEVER ♪ 1659 01:24:21,230 --> 01:24:25,756 ♪ I DRAG TO MY HOTEL TONIGHT? 1660 01:24:25,799 --> 01:24:30,108 ♪ IF THINGS GO ALL RIGHT 1661 01:24:30,152 --> 01:24:33,546 ♪ WHAT WILL I SAY THE NEXT DAY TO WHATEVER ♪ 1662 01:24:33,590 --> 01:24:37,463 ♪ I DRAG TO MY HOTEL TONIGHT? 1663 01:24:37,507 --> 01:24:41,815 ♪ WILL SHE BE OUT OF SIGHT? 1664 01:24:41,859 --> 01:24:43,252 [glass clinks] 1665 01:24:43,295 --> 01:24:44,601 - [echoing] WELL, LISTEN. 1666 01:24:44,644 --> 01:24:46,342 WE SHOULD GET TOGETHER SOMETIME. 1667 01:24:46,385 --> 01:24:49,301 HAVE A JAM. HEY, PLAY SOME BLUES. 1668 01:24:49,345 --> 01:24:51,303 EXTENSIONS! 1669 01:24:51,347 --> 01:24:54,176 WHAT ABOUT SOME EXTENDED BLUES LICKS? 1670 01:24:54,219 --> 01:24:57,440 WHITE PEOPLE CAN PLAY THE BLUES, YOU KNOW. 1671 01:24:57,483 --> 01:24:59,398 EXTENSIONS! 1672 01:24:59,442 --> 01:25:00,530 - UHH, WHAT? 1673 01:25:00,573 --> 01:25:01,531 - EXTENSIONS! 1674 01:25:01,574 --> 01:25:03,315 - UHH, WHAT? 1675 01:25:03,359 --> 01:25:04,577 - EXTENSIONS! 1676 01:25:04,621 --> 01:25:05,926 - UHH, WHAT? 1677 01:25:05,970 --> 01:25:08,233 - EXTENSIONS! - UHH, WHAT? 1678 01:25:08,277 --> 01:25:09,713 - WHAT ABOUT SOME EXTENDED BLUES LICKS? 1679 01:25:09,756 --> 01:25:12,846 WHAT ABOUT SOME EXTENDED BLUES LICKS? 1680 01:25:12,890 --> 01:25:15,371 - YEAH, I GAVE IT TO HIM. 1681 01:25:15,414 --> 01:25:18,591 YEAH, HE WENT BACK TO THE SPECIAL ROOM. 1682 01:25:18,635 --> 01:25:22,117 NO, NO. HE'S GONNA SMOKE IT. 1683 01:25:22,160 --> 01:25:25,120 [eerie music] 1684 01:25:25,163 --> 01:25:33,084 ♪ 1685 01:25:59,197 --> 01:26:03,593 [insect buzzing] 1686 01:26:03,636 --> 01:26:05,029 [footsteps running] 1687 01:26:05,072 --> 01:26:07,727 - JEFF HAS GONE OUT THERE ON THAT STUFF! 1688 01:26:07,771 --> 01:26:09,251 - HE SHOULD HAVE NEVER HAVE USED THE ELIXIR 1689 01:26:09,294 --> 01:26:11,775 AND ONLY STUCK TO THE INCENSE. OH, ATLANTIS. 1690 01:26:11,818 --> 01:26:14,256 - THAT WAS BILLY THE MOUNTAIN, DRESSED UP LIKE DONOVAN, 1691 01:26:14,299 --> 01:26:16,780 FADING OUT ON THE WALL-MOUNTED TV SCREEN. 1692 01:26:16,823 --> 01:26:19,652 JEFF IS FLIPPING OUT. ROAD FATIGUE! 1693 01:26:19,696 --> 01:26:22,655 WE'VE GOT TO GET HIM BACK TO NORMAL BEFORE ZAPPA FINDS OUT 1694 01:26:22,699 --> 01:26:25,136 AND STEALS IT AND MAKES HIM DO IT IN THE MOVIE! 1695 01:26:25,180 --> 01:26:27,660 - YOU HAVE A BRILLIANT CAREER AHEAD OF YOU, MY BOY. 1696 01:26:27,704 --> 01:26:29,140 JUST GET OUT OF THIS GROUP! 1697 01:26:29,184 --> 01:26:30,924 - HOWARD, THAT WAS STUDEBAKER HOCH 1698 01:26:30,968 --> 01:26:32,404 DRESSED UP LIKE JIM PONS 1699 01:26:32,448 --> 01:26:34,145 GIVING CAREER GUIDANCE TO THE BASS PLAYER 1700 01:26:34,189 --> 01:26:36,147 OF A ROCK-ORIENTED COMEDY GROUP. 1701 01:26:36,191 --> 01:26:38,018 JEFF'S IMAGINATION HAS GONE BEYOND THE FRINGE 1702 01:26:38,062 --> 01:26:40,804 OF AUDIENCE COMPREHENSION. 1703 01:26:40,847 --> 01:26:42,719 JEFF, JEFF, IT'S ME, THE FLUORESCENT LEECH! 1704 01:26:42,762 --> 01:26:44,242 - JEFF, JEFF! IT'S ME, EDDIE! - I'M STEALING THE TOWELS! 1705 01:26:44,286 --> 01:26:48,899 [laughing hysterically] 1706 01:26:48,942 --> 01:26:51,902 [eerie music] 1707 01:26:51,945 --> 01:26:59,866 ♪ 1708 01:27:13,576 --> 01:27:15,578 [giggles] 1709 01:27:38,862 --> 01:27:41,299 [giggling] 1710 01:27:43,736 --> 01:27:46,043 - [American accent] THIS, AS YOU MAY HAVE GATHERED, 1711 01:27:46,086 --> 01:27:48,001 IS THE END OF THE MOVIE. 1712 01:27:48,045 --> 01:27:50,308 THE ENTIRE CAST IS ASSEMBLED HERE 1713 01:27:50,352 --> 01:27:53,006 AT THE CENTERVILLE RECREATIONAL FACILITY 1714 01:27:53,050 --> 01:27:55,226 TO BID FAREWELL TO YOU 1715 01:27:55,270 --> 01:27:59,012 AND TO EXPRESS THANKS FOR YOUR ATTENDANCE AT THIS THEATER. 1716 01:27:59,056 --> 01:28:00,449 [chuckles] 1717 01:28:00,492 --> 01:28:02,059 THIS MIGHT SEEM OLD-FASHIONED TO SOME OF YOU, 1718 01:28:02,102 --> 01:28:03,756 BUT I'D LIKE TO JOIN IN ON THIS SONG. 1719 01:28:03,800 --> 01:28:05,236 IT'S THE KIND OF A SENTIMENTAL SONG 1720 01:28:05,280 --> 01:28:07,238 THAT YOU GET AT THE END OF A MOVIE. 1721 01:28:07,282 --> 01:28:09,719 IT'S THE KIND OF A SONG THAT PEOPLE MIGHT SING 1722 01:28:09,762 --> 01:28:11,721 TO LET YOU IN THE AUDIENCE KNOW 1723 01:28:11,764 --> 01:28:15,028 THAT WE REALLY LIKE YOU, WE CARE ABOUT YOU, WE, UH... 1724 01:28:15,072 --> 01:28:19,468 UNDERSTAND HOW HARD IT IS TO LAUGH THESE DAYS... 1725 01:28:19,511 --> 01:28:21,034 [German accent] WITH ALL THE TERRIBLE PROBLEMS 1726 01:28:21,078 --> 01:28:23,428 IN THE WORLD. 1727 01:28:23,472 --> 01:28:27,258 ♪ LORD, HAVE MERCY 1728 01:28:27,302 --> 01:28:31,784 ♪ ON THE PEOPLE IN ENGLAND 1729 01:28:31,828 --> 01:28:35,788 ♪ FOR THE TERRIBLE FOOD 1730 01:28:35,832 --> 01:28:40,793 ♪ THESE PEOPLE MUST EAT 1731 01:28:40,837 --> 01:28:42,055 ♪ AHH 1732 01:28:42,099 --> 01:28:44,797 EXCUSE ME. 1733 01:28:44,841 --> 01:28:50,499 ♪ AND MAY THE LORD HAVE MERCY 1734 01:28:50,542 --> 01:28:54,503 ♪ ON THE FATE OF THIS MOVIE 1735 01:28:54,546 --> 01:28:58,071 ♪ AND GOD BLESS THE MIND 1736 01:28:58,115 --> 01:29:03,338 ♪ OF THE MAN IN THE STREET 1737 01:29:03,381 --> 01:29:08,081 [slow symphonic music] 1738 01:29:08,125 --> 01:29:09,779 [bubbling] 1739 01:29:09,822 --> 01:29:11,563 ♪ 1740 01:29:11,607 --> 01:29:14,827 all: ♪ HELP ALL THE REDNECKS 1741 01:29:14,871 --> 01:29:19,136 ♪ AND THE FLATFOOT POLICEMEN 1742 01:29:19,179 --> 01:29:22,835 ♪ ON THE TERRIBLE FUNCTIONS 1743 01:29:22,879 --> 01:29:27,536 ♪ THEY ALL MUST PERFORM 1744 01:29:27,579 --> 01:29:31,540 ♪ GOD HELP THE WINOS 1745 01:29:31,583 --> 01:29:35,544 ♪ THE JUNKIES, AND THE WEIRDOES ♪ 1746 01:29:35,587 --> 01:29:39,548 - [vocalizing] 1747 01:29:39,591 --> 01:29:44,204 all: ♪ AND EVERY POOR SOUL 1748 01:29:44,248 --> 01:29:51,690 ♪ WHO'S ADRIFT IN THE STORM 1749 01:29:51,734 --> 01:29:55,868 ♪ 1750 01:29:55,912 --> 01:29:58,871 ♪ HELP EVERYBODY 1751 01:29:58,915 --> 01:30:02,875 ♪ SO THEY ALL GET SOME ACTION 1752 01:30:02,919 --> 01:30:06,836 ♪ SOME LOVE ON THE WEEKEND 1753 01:30:06,879 --> 01:30:11,406 ♪ SOME REAL SATISFACTION 1754 01:30:11,449 --> 01:30:16,846 ♪ 1755 01:30:16,889 --> 01:30:20,371 - ♪ A ROOM AND A MEAL 1756 01:30:20,415 --> 01:30:25,158 ♪ AND A GARBAGE DISPOSAL 1757 01:30:25,202 --> 01:30:29,162 ♪ A LAWN AND A HOSE'LL 1758 01:30:29,206 --> 01:30:34,733 ♪ BE STRICTLY GENTEEL 1759 01:30:34,777 --> 01:30:35,778 [bubbling] 1760 01:30:35,821 --> 01:30:38,171 [cymbal crashes] 1761 01:30:38,215 --> 01:30:41,000 [all vocalizing] 1762 01:30:41,044 --> 01:30:48,965 ♪ 1763 01:31:12,249 --> 01:31:15,426 all: ♪ LORD, HAVE MERCY 1764 01:31:15,470 --> 01:31:19,430 ♪ ON THE HIPPIES AND FAGGOTS 1765 01:31:19,474 --> 01:31:22,477 ♪ AND THE DYKES AND THE WEIRD 1766 01:31:22,520 --> 01:31:29,658 ♪ LITTLE CHILDREN THEY GROW 1767 01:31:29,701 --> 01:31:34,445 ♪ 1768 01:31:34,489 --> 01:31:39,189 ♪ HELP THE BLACK MAN 1769 01:31:39,232 --> 01:31:41,452 ♪ 1770 01:31:41,496 --> 01:31:49,504 ♪ HELP THE POOR MAN 1771 01:31:49,547 --> 01:31:53,246 ♪ HELP THE MILKMAN 1772 01:31:53,290 --> 01:31:56,598 ♪ HELP THE DOORMAN 1773 01:31:56,641 --> 01:31:59,296 ♪ HELP THE LONELY 1774 01:31:59,339 --> 01:32:02,038 ♪ NEGLECTED OLD FARTS 1775 01:32:02,081 --> 01:32:08,435 ♪ THAT I KNOW 1776 01:32:11,264 --> 01:32:16,966 [all vocalizing] 1777 01:32:17,009 --> 01:32:19,708 - WELL, IT CERTAINLY HAS BEEN SWELL 1778 01:32:19,751 --> 01:32:22,972 HAVING YOU WITH US TONIGHT, FOLKS. 1779 01:32:23,015 --> 01:32:25,888 IF YOUR NAME WASN'T ON THE LIST OF BLESSINGS 1780 01:32:25,931 --> 01:32:28,020 WE'VE BEEN PASSING OUT TONIGHT, 1781 01:32:28,064 --> 01:32:30,066 WE DON'T WANT YOU TO BE PISSED OFF. 1782 01:32:30,109 --> 01:32:31,589 - NO... 1783 01:32:31,633 --> 01:32:33,504 - WE DON'T WANT YOU TO LEAVE THAT THEATER. 1784 01:32:33,548 --> 01:32:36,028 - FORGIVE HIM, FOR HE KNOWS NOT WHAT HE DOES. 1785 01:32:36,072 --> 01:32:37,726 STOP. 1786 01:32:37,769 --> 01:32:40,032 - BUT BEFORE WE GO ON, I'D LIKE TO INTRODUCE TO YOU... 1787 01:32:40,076 --> 01:32:41,773 - ON THE OTHER HAND, MAYBE HE DOES KNOW. 1788 01:32:41,817 --> 01:32:44,471 - MY GOOD FRIEND AND MUSICAL ASSOCIATE, 1789 01:32:44,515 --> 01:32:46,996 MR. HOWARD KAYLAN, 1790 01:32:47,039 --> 01:32:53,698 WHO'S ABOUT TO GIVE US THE CLOSING FINAL BENEDICTION. 1791 01:32:53,742 --> 01:32:56,527 [cymbal crashes] 1792 01:32:56,571 --> 01:33:03,534 - ♪ THEY'RE GONNA CLEAR OUT THE STUDIO ♪ 1793 01:33:03,578 --> 01:33:07,538 ♪ THEY'RE GONNA TEAR DOWN ALL THE...♪ 1794 01:33:07,582 --> 01:33:09,192 - YEAH. 1795 01:33:09,235 --> 01:33:12,717 - ♪ THEY'RE GONNA WHIP DOWN ALL THE...♪ 1796 01:33:12,761 --> 01:33:14,371 [drum hit] 1797 01:33:14,414 --> 01:33:19,158 - ♪ THEY'RE GONNA SWEEP OUT ALL THE...♪ 1798 01:33:19,202 --> 01:33:22,466 [drum lick] 1799 01:33:22,509 --> 01:33:26,862 - ♪ THEY'RE GONNA PAY OFF ALL THE...♪ 1800 01:33:26,905 --> 01:33:29,734 - OH, YEAH! 1801 01:33:29,778 --> 01:33:34,652 both: ♪ AND THEN 1802 01:33:34,696 --> 01:33:37,220 [rock music] ♪ AND THEN 1803 01:33:37,263 --> 01:33:39,352 ♪ AND THEN 1804 01:33:39,396 --> 01:33:41,616 ♪ AND THEN, HEY, HEY, HEY 1805 01:33:41,659 --> 01:33:44,793 ♪ EVERYBODY IN THE ORCHESTRA AND THE CHORUS ♪ 1806 01:33:44,836 --> 01:33:48,797 ♪ TALKIN' 'BOUT EVERY ONE OF OUR LOVELY AND TALENTED DANCERS ♪ 1807 01:33:48,840 --> 01:33:51,364 ♪ TALKIN' 'BOUT THE LIGHT BULB MEN ♪ 1808 01:33:51,408 --> 01:33:53,279 ♪ THE CAMERAMEN 1809 01:33:53,323 --> 01:33:55,151 ♪ THE MAKE-UP MEN 1810 01:33:55,194 --> 01:33:57,109 ♪ THE FAKE-UP MEN 1811 01:33:57,153 --> 01:33:59,459 ♪ YEAH, THE RAKE-UP MEN 1812 01:33:59,503 --> 01:34:02,114 ♪ ESPECIALLY HERBIE COHEN, YEAH ♪ 1813 01:34:02,158 --> 01:34:03,463 - WHOO! - YEAH! 1814 01:34:03,507 --> 01:34:06,466 - ♪ THEY'RE ALL GONNA RISE UP 1815 01:34:06,510 --> 01:34:08,686 ♪ THEY'RE GONNA JUMP UP 1816 01:34:08,730 --> 01:34:10,601 ♪ I SAID JUMP UP 1817 01:34:10,645 --> 01:34:13,473 ♪ TALKIN' 'BOUT JUMP RIGHT UP ON OFF THE FLOOR ♪ 1818 01:34:13,517 --> 01:34:15,127 [woman laughs] 1819 01:34:15,171 --> 01:34:18,827 ♪ JUMP RIGHT UP AND HIT THE DOOR ♪ 1820 01:34:18,870 --> 01:34:22,613 ♪ THEY'RE ALL GONNA RISE UP AND COME HOME ♪ 1821 01:34:22,657 --> 01:34:26,399 ♪ THEY'RE GONNA RIDE ON HOME 1822 01:34:26,443 --> 01:34:30,403 ♪ THEY'RE GONNA RIDE ON HOME ♪ 1823 01:34:30,447 --> 01:34:34,407 ♪ THEY'RE GONNA RIDE ON HOME 1824 01:34:34,451 --> 01:34:38,847 ♪ THEY'RE GONNA RIDE ON HOME ♪ 1825 01:34:38,890 --> 01:34:41,110 ♪ AND ONCE AGAIN 1826 01:34:41,153 --> 01:34:43,068 ♪ TAKE THEMSELVES 1827 01:34:43,112 --> 01:34:44,896 ♪ SERIOUSLY 1828 01:34:44,940 --> 01:34:46,811 ♪ EEEH 1829 01:34:46,855 --> 01:34:50,597 ♪ YEAH, TWO, THREE, FOUR, SERIOUSLY ♪ 1830 01:34:50,641 --> 01:34:52,643 ♪ THEY'RE ALL GONNA GO HOME 1831 01:34:52,687 --> 01:34:54,253 - YEE! 1832 01:34:54,297 --> 01:34:58,257 - ♪ THROUGH THE DRIVING SLEET AND RAIN ♪ 1833 01:34:58,301 --> 01:35:01,957 ♪ THEY'RE ALL GONNA GO HOME 1834 01:35:02,000 --> 01:35:05,961 ♪ THROUGH THE FOG, THROUGH THE DUST ♪ 1835 01:35:06,004 --> 01:35:10,443 ♪ THROUGH THE TROPICAL FEVER AND THE BLISTERING FROST ♪ 1836 01:35:10,487 --> 01:35:13,229 ♪ THEY'RE ALL GONNA GO HOME 1837 01:35:13,272 --> 01:35:14,709 ♪ YEAH, YEAH 1838 01:35:14,752 --> 01:35:18,495 ♪ OUT OF IT AS THEY CAN BE, BABY ♪ 1839 01:35:18,538 --> 01:35:22,760 ♪ AND THE SAME GOES FOR ME 1840 01:35:22,804 --> 01:35:26,459 - ♪ THE SAME GOES FOR ME 1841 01:35:26,503 --> 01:35:28,723 - ♪ OH, YEAH 1842 01:35:28,766 --> 01:35:30,725 ♪ OH, YEAH 1843 01:35:30,768 --> 01:35:32,901 ♪ OH, YEAH 1844 01:35:32,944 --> 01:35:34,946 ♪ OH, YEAH 1845 01:35:34,990 --> 01:35:36,295 - AND EACH AND EVERY MEMBER 1846 01:35:36,339 --> 01:35:37,906 OF THIS ROCK-ORIENTED COMEDY GROUP, 1847 01:35:37,949 --> 01:35:39,472 IN HIS OWN SPECIAL WAY... 1848 01:35:39,516 --> 01:35:42,475 ♪ IS GONNA GET OUT OF IT AS HE CAN BE ♪ 1849 01:35:42,519 --> 01:35:46,088 both: ♪ WE ALL GONNA GET WASTED ♪ 1850 01:35:46,131 --> 01:35:50,048 ♪ WE ALL GONNA GET TWISTED 1851 01:35:50,092 --> 01:35:54,531 ♪ WE ALL GONNA GET WASTED 1852 01:35:54,574 --> 01:35:57,882 ♪ WE ALL GONNA GET TWISTED 1853 01:35:57,926 --> 01:36:01,625 - ♪ AND I AM DEFINITELY GONNA GET REAMED ♪ 1854 01:36:01,668 --> 01:36:03,888 both: ♪ 'CAUSE I'M SUCH A LONELY ♪ 1855 01:36:03,932 --> 01:36:05,934 ♪ I'M SUCH A LONELY 1856 01:36:05,977 --> 01:36:12,941 ♪ A LONELY, LONELY, TALKIN' 'BOUT A LONELY GUY ♪ 1857 01:36:12,984 --> 01:36:15,204 OHH, AND I KNOW TONIGHT, 1858 01:36:15,247 --> 01:36:16,814 I AM DEFINITELY... 1859 01:36:16,858 --> 01:36:18,947 I AM POSITIVELY... 1860 01:36:18,990 --> 01:36:22,733 I JUST HAVE TO GET... 1861 01:36:22,777 --> 01:36:25,518 ♪ BENT 1862 01:36:25,562 --> 01:36:26,737 ♪ REAMED 1863 01:36:26,781 --> 01:36:34,527 ♪ AND WASTED 1864 01:36:34,571 --> 01:36:38,009 - A DISASTER AREA THE SIZE OF ATLANTIC CITY, 1865 01:36:38,053 --> 01:36:39,794 NEW JERSEY! 1866 01:36:39,837 --> 01:36:42,797 [all vocalizing] 1867 01:36:42,840 --> 01:36:51,762 ♪ 1868 01:36:51,806 --> 01:36:54,765 - OHH, OHH... 1869 01:36:54,809 --> 01:36:57,986 OH, HE'S MAKING ME DO THIS, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. 1870 01:36:58,029 --> 01:37:00,510 I WOULDN'T DO IT IF IT WEREN'T FOR HIM. 1871 01:37:00,553 --> 01:37:02,773 YOU NOTICED, ALL THROUGH THIS MATERIAL, 1872 01:37:02,817 --> 01:37:04,993 I'VE BEEN GLANCING OVER TOWARD MY LEFT? 1873 01:37:05,036 --> 01:37:07,778 WELL, I'LL TELL YOU THE REASON FOR THAT, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. 1874 01:37:07,822 --> 01:37:09,388 HE IS OVER THERE. 1875 01:37:09,432 --> 01:37:11,086 HE IS OVER ON THE LEFT. 1876 01:37:11,129 --> 01:37:14,306 HE IS THE GUY THAT IS MAKING ME DO ALL THIS SHIT. 1877 01:37:14,350 --> 01:37:16,961 RIGHT OVER THERE. NOW, ALL THROUGH THIS MOVIE 1878 01:37:17,005 --> 01:37:18,702 EVERY TIME WE'VE BEEN ON STAGE, 1879 01:37:18,745 --> 01:37:20,660 I'VE HAD TO LOOK OVER IN THAT DIRECTION, RIGHT? 1880 01:37:20,704 --> 01:37:22,575 YOU SAW IT. YOU KNOW. 1881 01:37:22,619 --> 01:37:24,099 WELL, THAT'S 'CAUSE HE'S OVER THERE. 1882 01:37:24,142 --> 01:37:25,927 I'VE GOT TO WATCH HIM FOR TIME. 1883 01:37:25,970 --> 01:37:28,407 HE JUMPS UP AND DOWN LIKE A JACKASS. 1884 01:37:28,451 --> 01:37:30,714 I CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE THE GUY SOMETIMES. 1885 01:37:30,757 --> 01:37:32,455 BUT WE GOTTA WATCH HIM. 1886 01:37:32,498 --> 01:37:34,892 "AFTER ALL," WE SAID, "IT IS FRANK'S MOVIE." 1887 01:37:34,936 --> 01:37:37,286 NOW, WE'RE THE MOTHERS, BUT IT'S STILL FRANK'S MOVIE. 1888 01:37:37,329 --> 01:37:38,940 [orchestra playing, crowd wailing] 1889 01:37:38,983 --> 01:37:41,594 HE GOT THE MONEY FOR THIS. HE RENTED THE STUDIO. 1890 01:37:41,638 --> 01:37:43,292 HAD ALL THESE CHEESY SETS BUILT. 1891 01:37:43,335 --> 01:37:47,339 IT'S SO MOCHE! I CAN'T EVEN STAND IT. 1892 01:37:47,383 --> 01:37:50,342 [crowd and orchestra drowning him out] 1893 01:37:50,386 --> 01:37:57,915 ♪ 1894 01:37:57,959 --> 01:37:59,786 - WHOO HOO HOO HOO! 1895 01:37:59,830 --> 01:38:03,007 [wild shouts from crowd] 1896 01:38:13,539 --> 01:38:15,890 [orchestra and shouts die] 1897 01:38:15,933 --> 01:38:19,415 [drum roll] 1898 01:38:19,458 --> 01:38:22,418 [dramatic symphonic music] 1899 01:38:22,461 --> 01:38:30,382 ♪ 120821

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