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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:08,696 --> 00:00:13,599 [Man Narrating] In the beginning, God created the universe... 2 00:00:16,771 --> 00:00:18,705 the heavens... 3 00:00:20,541 --> 00:00:22,702 and the earth. 4 00:00:29,050 --> 00:00:34,181 Then God created the first nerd. 5 00:00:56,377 --> 00:00:58,572 [Chattering] 6 00:01:04,151 --> 00:01:07,018 I'm going to take note on your champagne glasses. 7 00:01:07,088 --> 00:01:11,388 Check the silver service and make sure it's properly polished. 8 00:01:11,459 --> 00:01:14,553 Eugene, take this to the kitchen. Make sure the steam tables have arrived. 9 00:01:14,629 --> 00:01:17,530 Check on the tablecloths and make sure they're the right color. 10 00:01:17,598 --> 00:01:23,059 [Continues Chattering] 11 00:01:23,137 --> 00:01:25,332 Oh, boy. Oh, boy, I don't know. 12 00:01:25,406 --> 00:01:27,874 Aaron, relax. You're driving us all crazy. 13 00:01:27,942 --> 00:01:29,876 This better be a great wedding. 14 00:01:29,944 --> 00:01:33,141 Every political heavyweight from the party is gonna be there checking me out. 15 00:01:33,214 --> 00:01:36,843 Jeanie's wedding is going to be wonderful. Fix your ascot. 16 00:01:36,917 --> 00:01:40,978 How come we never met this guy that Jeanie's marrying? 17 00:01:41,055 --> 00:01:43,649 - What's his name again? - Dudley Dawson. 18 00:01:43,724 --> 00:01:47,922 - Yeah. - Hey, I wonder if he's from the Schenectady Dawsons? 19 00:01:47,995 --> 00:01:50,361 They're a very powerful family back east. 20 00:01:50,431 --> 00:01:52,456 - [Snaps Fingers] - I went to school with Cap Dawson. 21 00:01:52,533 --> 00:01:56,299 - Talk about your blue bloods. - Isn't it just a little bit strange... 22 00:01:56,370 --> 00:02:00,033 that Jeanie never brought, uh, what's-his-butt over here before? 23 00:02:00,107 --> 00:02:04,373 [Scoffs] His name is Dudley. They only met three months ago. 24 00:02:04,445 --> 00:02:06,504 I knew I'd be a shoo-in with the people... 25 00:02:06,580 --> 00:02:09,515 if I could just get those old-money blue bloods to endorse my candidacy. 26 00:02:09,583 --> 00:02:12,017 And they'd be damn fools not to, Dad... 27 00:02:12,086 --> 00:02:15,021 irregardless of the fact that you are nouveau riche. 28 00:02:19,326 --> 00:02:22,989 Don't you ever use that phrase in this house! 29 00:02:23,064 --> 00:02:28,502 I am not nouveau riche. I am a self-made businessman. 30 00:02:28,569 --> 00:02:31,367 And I'm not your dad. I'm your father-in-law. Get it? 31 00:02:31,439 --> 00:02:35,899 Right. Self-made businessman. Father-in law. I got it. 32 00:02:35,976 --> 00:02:38,570 Can we please stop talking about the campaign for a minute? 33 00:02:38,646 --> 00:02:41,843 Focus on Jeanie's wedding. That's what's important here. 34 00:02:41,916 --> 00:02:44,384 Gaylord's right, as usual. 35 00:02:45,653 --> 00:02:49,384 - [Woman] Hi, everybody. - Jeanie! 36 00:02:51,325 --> 00:02:54,817 - You look wonderful. - Thank you. 37 00:02:54,895 --> 00:02:56,886 I love that outfit. 38 00:02:56,964 --> 00:02:59,057 You do? 39 00:02:59,133 --> 00:03:02,591 - So, you excited? - Oh, yeah. 40 00:03:02,670 --> 00:03:05,571 Where'd you meet... Dudley? 41 00:03:05,639 --> 00:03:09,097 Well, at a ham and lima bean cookout. 42 00:03:15,149 --> 00:03:17,447 It was an Omega Mu sorority fund-raiser. 43 00:03:17,518 --> 00:03:19,816 Oh, sure, sure. 44 00:03:19,887 --> 00:03:25,120 The Schenectady Dawsons are very big with sororities and fund-raisers and cookouts. 45 00:03:25,192 --> 00:03:29,891 - [Doorbell Ringing] - All your questions will be answered in a moment. 46 00:03:29,964 --> 00:03:31,955 - [Knocking] - Oh! 47 00:03:32,032 --> 00:03:34,193 - Booger? - Why'd she call him Booger? 48 00:03:36,370 --> 00:03:38,304 - Baby! - Oh! 49 00:03:38,372 --> 00:03:40,306 Oh, honey. 50 00:03:40,374 --> 00:03:43,639 Oh... buns. 51 00:03:43,711 --> 00:03:46,111 - Give me buns! - [Shrieks] 52 00:03:46,180 --> 00:03:48,876 - May I have them, please? - Stop it! 53 00:03:48,949 --> 00:03:51,110 - Give me buns! - Shh! No! Shh! 54 00:03:51,185 --> 00:03:53,779 Moo! Moo! 55 00:03:53,854 --> 00:03:55,947 - My family is waiting to meet you. - [Groans] 56 00:03:57,625 --> 00:04:01,561 - Mommy! - Tippy! Tippy! 57 00:04:01,629 --> 00:04:05,463 - What happened? - Mommy fainted. 58 00:04:05,533 --> 00:04:07,626 Gosh, are you all right, Mrs. Humphrey? 59 00:04:07,701 --> 00:04:10,966 - Yeah, I- - She'll be fine. Can I ask you a question? 60 00:04:11,038 --> 00:04:13,973 Are you from the Schenectady Dawsons, railroad money? 61 00:04:14,041 --> 00:04:15,975 - Hmm? - Uh, no. 62 00:04:16,043 --> 00:04:18,773 The Detroit Dawsons. Sewing machine rental money. 63 00:04:18,846 --> 00:04:24,478 - There's gonna be an egg. Where's the kitchen? - Oh, to the left! 64 00:04:24,552 --> 00:04:27,419 - Are you all right, Mommy? - Yes, yes, I'm fine. 65 00:04:27,488 --> 00:04:29,922 I don't know what came over me. Oh! 66 00:04:29,990 --> 00:04:31,924 Sewing machine rental money? 67 00:04:31,992 --> 00:04:34,825 My God, he's a nerd! 68 00:04:34,895 --> 00:04:36,829 [All Gasp] 69 00:04:36,897 --> 00:04:39,263 A nerd? How can you tell? 70 00:04:39,333 --> 00:04:41,927 There were a lot of nerds at USC. 71 00:04:42,002 --> 00:04:45,028 I can smell a nerd a mile away. 72 00:04:45,105 --> 00:04:48,541 Well, I've heard nerds make wonderful husbands. 73 00:04:48,609 --> 00:04:51,908 And they're smart too. 74 00:04:51,979 --> 00:04:55,176 She's obviously getting even with us for something. 75 00:04:57,618 --> 00:05:00,178 - Beef! We need beef! - In there! 76 00:05:03,090 --> 00:05:05,490 That was kind of a rocky start with your family. 77 00:05:05,559 --> 00:05:07,550 Oh, everything's fine. My mom's great. 78 00:05:07,628 --> 00:05:09,562 I'm sure she's just overwhelmed from all the excitement. 79 00:05:09,630 --> 00:05:12,997 - You don't think it's because they don't like me? - Booger, I love you. 80 00:05:13,067 --> 00:05:17,128 Well, yeah, I know you- I got it! I know you do. 81 00:05:17,204 --> 00:05:20,571 But I was just afraid maybe your "mishpukin"' was thinking you were "mistookin'." 82 00:05:20,641 --> 00:05:23,337 They're gonna love you too, Booger. I know they will. 83 00:05:23,410 --> 00:05:25,537 - [Exhales] - Oh! 84 00:05:25,613 --> 00:05:28,639 Here you go, Mrs. Humphrey. Put this on the- Hey! 85 00:05:28,716 --> 00:05:31,207 - Oh! - [Gasps] 86 00:05:31,285 --> 00:05:35,085 Don't move. Don't move. Excuse me. That was clumsy. 87 00:05:35,155 --> 00:05:37,988 There we go. I've got it. 88 00:05:38,058 --> 00:05:40,583 Can I speak to you a second, Jeanie? 89 00:05:40,661 --> 00:05:42,322 Sure. 90 00:05:46,300 --> 00:05:49,064 Thank you, dear. 91 00:05:49,136 --> 00:05:51,331 It stops the swelling. 92 00:05:56,477 --> 00:05:58,411 Are you pregnant? 93 00:05:58,479 --> 00:06:01,414 Pregnant? No! 94 00:06:01,482 --> 00:06:04,007 You mean, you don't have to marry him? 95 00:06:04,084 --> 00:06:08,919 - Daddy! - I would like you to come with me to a cult deprogramming. 96 00:06:08,989 --> 00:06:12,425 J-Just show up there and be open. That's all I ask. 97 00:06:13,794 --> 00:06:16,854 I just can't believe you're saying this. [Whimpers] 98 00:06:16,931 --> 00:06:21,766 Wh-Where are you going? This is good stuff I'm telling you. 99 00:06:21,835 --> 00:06:24,531 [Sobbing] I love Booger! 100 00:06:24,605 --> 00:06:29,133 And I'm gonna marry him no matter what you think! [Sobbing] 101 00:06:29,209 --> 00:06:31,609 Jeanie? 102 00:06:31,679 --> 00:06:33,476 - Sweetheart, you're overreacting. - [Door Slams] 103 00:06:33,547 --> 00:06:36,607 - What did you say to her? - Nothing. 104 00:06:36,684 --> 00:06:40,211 Nothing. We just had a little conversation, that's all. 105 00:06:40,287 --> 00:06:42,778 Can't we all just get along? 106 00:06:42,856 --> 00:06:46,485 She comes home with a guy who looks like he came out of a vending machine... 107 00:06:46,560 --> 00:06:49,825 - and I'm the one who's wrong. - [Tippy] Jeanie. Jeanie. 108 00:06:53,200 --> 00:06:55,395 What a world. 109 00:06:56,370 --> 00:06:58,964 Hey! 110 00:06:59,039 --> 00:07:01,337 Hi, I'm Jeanie's sister, Gaylord. 111 00:07:01,408 --> 00:07:04,468 And this is my husband, Chip. Chip Medford. 112 00:07:04,545 --> 00:07:07,480 Great idea. Having the wedding on Valentine's Day. 113 00:07:15,889 --> 00:07:19,017 Are you sure your best man knows where we are located? 114 00:07:19,093 --> 00:07:21,857 Oh, he'll find it all right. 115 00:07:23,130 --> 00:07:26,190 As a matter of fact, he will be here in exactly... 116 00:07:26,266 --> 00:07:28,200 seven seconds. 117 00:07:28,268 --> 00:07:31,260 Five, four... 118 00:07:31,338 --> 00:07:34,671 three, two, one. 119 00:07:37,311 --> 00:07:41,179 Right on the button. Lewis! 120 00:07:41,248 --> 00:07:44,012 Booger! 121 00:07:44,084 --> 00:07:46,177 Pull in here! 122 00:07:46,253 --> 00:07:49,450 [Honks Horn] 123 00:07:55,295 --> 00:07:57,627 [Hydraulics Hissing] 124 00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:03,868 [Both Laughing] 125 00:08:03,937 --> 00:08:07,270 - Oh, Booger's wedding. - Yeah! 126 00:08:07,341 --> 00:08:10,469 - [Singsong] Booger's gettin' married. - Oh, come on. Stop it! 127 00:08:10,544 --> 00:08:12,478 Hey, what do you think of the truck? 128 00:08:12,546 --> 00:08:15,014 I would expect nothing else from the king of the nerds. 129 00:08:15,082 --> 00:08:16,982 - It's got everything. - Where's Betty? 130 00:08:17,051 --> 00:08:19,451 Oh, follow me. 131 00:08:19,520 --> 00:08:22,387 - Would you like to see my unborn fetal son? - Yeah. 132 00:08:22,456 --> 00:08:24,754 This is a state-of-the-art, remote-activated... 133 00:08:24,825 --> 00:08:28,261 microwave-transmitted, bilingual, five DB-gain... 134 00:08:28,328 --> 00:08:31,161 semi-duplex fetal monitor. 135 00:08:31,231 --> 00:08:35,668 I can check on the development the vital signs of my unborn fetal son... 136 00:08:35,736 --> 00:08:39,069 - from anywhere in the universe. - Look. 137 00:08:39,139 --> 00:08:41,004 There's his tinkler. 138 00:08:41,075 --> 00:08:43,737 Just like the old man, huh? 139 00:08:43,811 --> 00:08:46,177 [Both Guffawing] 140 00:08:54,521 --> 00:08:57,752 - Booger! - Betty! 141 00:08:57,825 --> 00:09:02,194 - What is this? - An Airbus A300 Whisper Jet... 142 00:09:02,262 --> 00:09:07,222 could land right on our truck, and Betty and our unborn fetal son wouldn't be hurt. 143 00:09:07,301 --> 00:09:09,462 - Lewis? - Hmm? 144 00:09:09,536 --> 00:09:11,697 Could you let me out of here? 145 00:09:11,772 --> 00:09:14,605 - Oh, sure, Betty. - Here. Let me give you a hand. 146 00:09:14,675 --> 00:09:16,609 - Thank you. - [Hisses] 147 00:09:16,677 --> 00:09:18,611 [All Laughing] 148 00:09:18,679 --> 00:09:21,375 So, Booger, how are things going with the in-laws? 149 00:09:21,448 --> 00:09:23,780 Well, things were going okay... 150 00:09:23,851 --> 00:09:26,877 until my mother-in-law passed out and cracked her head on the coffee table. 151 00:09:26,954 --> 00:09:31,288 - [Both] Oh. - I don't think my father-in-law likes me at all. 152 00:09:31,358 --> 00:09:34,486 - [Both] Oh. - He's one of those pretentious... 153 00:09:34,561 --> 00:09:38,429 hoity-toity, nouveau riche types. 154 00:09:38,499 --> 00:09:40,865 - He may be anti-nerd. - [Both Gasp] 155 00:09:40,934 --> 00:09:43,402 Oh, no. 156 00:09:43,470 --> 00:09:45,904 Why does this always have to poke its ugly head out? 157 00:09:45,973 --> 00:09:49,306 Indeed. We need to nip this in the bud. 158 00:09:49,376 --> 00:09:54,006 Booger, I want you to know I take my job as best man very seriously. 159 00:09:54,081 --> 00:09:57,642 And I will take care of everything, including Jeanie's old man. 160 00:09:57,718 --> 00:10:00,551 Never fear, Skolnick's here. 161 00:10:00,621 --> 00:10:03,181 - I love you, you big galoot. - [Laughs] 162 00:10:03,257 --> 00:10:05,748 I feel better already. 163 00:10:05,893 --> 00:10:08,828 - [Horn Honks] - Hey, here comes the gang. 164 00:10:08,896 --> 00:10:12,457 - ♪♪ [Nerds Singing] - Hey, guys! 165 00:10:12,533 --> 00:10:15,434 ♪♪ [Singing Ends] 166 00:10:15,502 --> 00:10:19,336 [Whooping, Chattering] 167 00:10:23,744 --> 00:10:26,713 - Lamar! - Party, party, party! 168 00:10:26,780 --> 00:10:30,375 Booger! 169 00:10:30,450 --> 00:10:33,613 - [Camera Shutter Clicks] - Nerds are here! 170 00:10:33,687 --> 00:10:36,019 - Takashi! - Booger! 171 00:10:37,958 --> 00:10:40,927 - Lewis! Hi, Lewis. - Takash, how are you? Good to see you. 172 00:10:40,994 --> 00:10:44,225 Oh, Betty! Betty so big. 173 00:10:44,298 --> 00:10:47,358 Oh, look at you! 174 00:10:47,434 --> 00:10:50,562 - Oh, Judy! - Uncle Lewis! 175 00:10:50,637 --> 00:10:53,401 - Harold! Good trip? - It was great. 176 00:10:53,473 --> 00:10:56,408 The bus driver said we were the first group ever... 177 00:10:56,476 --> 00:10:59,912 to make it all the way through "A Hundred Bottles of Beer on the Wall." 178 00:10:59,980 --> 00:11:02,073 Yes! Hey! 179 00:11:02,149 --> 00:11:05,414 It's been delightful motoring with you. 180 00:11:05,485 --> 00:11:08,249 Trevor, how was the trip? 181 00:11:08,322 --> 00:11:10,347 I only got carsick twice. 182 00:11:10,424 --> 00:11:12,984 Oh! I'm proud of you, laddie. 183 00:11:13,060 --> 00:11:17,997 [Both Speaking Spanish] 184 00:11:18,065 --> 00:11:20,499 I am just so thrilled you all showed up. 185 00:11:22,302 --> 00:11:25,271 - [Both] Stan! - Hi, guys. 186 00:11:25,339 --> 00:11:28,206 - Stan! - Booger! 187 00:11:28,275 --> 00:11:30,743 - Great to see you. - You too. 188 00:11:30,811 --> 00:11:32,904 Oh, Betty, you're gonna make such a pretty mom. 189 00:11:34,848 --> 00:11:36,782 Stan, you are such a nerd. 190 00:11:36,850 --> 00:11:40,047 Yeah, I sure am. I'm selling software up in Silicon Valley. 191 00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:42,418 - That's fantastic. - I've never been happier in my whole life. 192 00:11:42,489 --> 00:11:44,423 [Both Guffawing] 193 00:11:45,926 --> 00:11:48,793 [Chanting] Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! 194 00:11:48,862 --> 00:11:52,025 Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! 195 00:11:52,099 --> 00:11:54,090 - Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! - [Moans] 196 00:11:54,167 --> 00:11:58,001 Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! 197 00:12:00,941 --> 00:12:04,570 Hey, it looks like you're breaking out. 198 00:12:04,645 --> 00:12:07,773 What are you talking about? I've always had a perfect complexion. 199 00:12:08,849 --> 00:12:10,783 I think you've got the chicken pox. 200 00:12:19,226 --> 00:12:23,322 - Easy on the sauce, Aaron. - You don't think I'm gonna go through this sober? 201 00:12:23,397 --> 00:12:25,888 Come on, relax. It's not as bad as all that. 202 00:12:25,966 --> 00:12:28,958 What is this dog hair doing here? We don't have a dog. 203 00:12:29,036 --> 00:12:32,164 Excuse me. Do you prefer the salad forks to be chilled... 204 00:12:32,239 --> 00:12:34,332 or the salad plates or both? 205 00:12:34,408 --> 00:12:37,002 - Well- - Figure it out. 206 00:12:37,077 --> 00:12:39,272 - Aaron! - Oh, I never. 207 00:12:39,346 --> 00:12:43,749 I cannot work in a vacuum. I need input. I need feedback. 208 00:12:43,817 --> 00:12:46,251 - Romeo! Romeo! - [Mumbling] 209 00:12:46,320 --> 00:12:48,880 This is so unfair. 210 00:12:48,955 --> 00:12:52,482 No one told me I would be catering a wedding for a bunch of nerds. 211 00:12:52,559 --> 00:12:55,756 Romeo, don't leave, please. Please, no, no! 212 00:12:55,829 --> 00:12:58,821 - [Man] Eugene! - [Horn Honks] 213 00:13:07,074 --> 00:13:08,871 [Mouthing Words] 214 00:13:10,344 --> 00:13:13,279 It looks as though the happy event is about to begin. 215 00:13:14,514 --> 00:13:17,142 I worked hard my whole life. 216 00:13:17,217 --> 00:13:22,849 I started out at 13 selling cheap porcelain nicknacks door-to-door. 217 00:13:22,923 --> 00:13:25,118 You know how hard that is? 218 00:13:25,192 --> 00:13:27,183 After she marries that nose-picking "jibony"... 219 00:13:27,260 --> 00:13:29,956 I can kiss my political career good-bye. 220 00:13:30,030 --> 00:13:32,260 - Yeah. - Yeah. 221 00:13:32,332 --> 00:13:35,859 And you can kiss taking over Humphrey Industries good-bye. 222 00:13:37,804 --> 00:13:41,706 [Lewis] It's amazing he'll let you live there. You'll have your own computer room. 223 00:13:41,775 --> 00:13:44,801 You know, there's two days before the wedding. 224 00:13:44,878 --> 00:13:47,870 - A lot of things could happen. - Like what? 225 00:13:47,948 --> 00:13:51,645 Engagements get canceled all the time for all sorts of reasons. 226 00:13:51,718 --> 00:13:53,709 You mean break up the wedding? 227 00:13:53,787 --> 00:13:56,585 We all want what's best for the family. 228 00:13:56,656 --> 00:13:59,181 Break up my daughter's wedding? 229 00:13:59,259 --> 00:14:01,853 Don't even think about it. You got a nasty mind, Chip. 230 00:14:01,928 --> 00:14:04,726 I hate when you have a nasty mind. Break up my daughter's wedding. 231 00:14:04,798 --> 00:14:06,732 Geez. 232 00:14:09,302 --> 00:14:13,830 In addition to ruining any chance of a political career... 233 00:14:13,907 --> 00:14:15,602 think for one minute... 234 00:14:15,675 --> 00:14:18,576 what this will do to the family tree. 235 00:14:32,225 --> 00:14:35,524 You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose... 236 00:14:35,595 --> 00:14:38,291 but you can't pick your relatives. 237 00:14:43,003 --> 00:14:45,130 Do whatever you have to do. 238 00:14:56,450 --> 00:14:58,918 Smile pretty. Smile pretty. 239 00:14:58,985 --> 00:15:00,919 Thank you. 240 00:15:00,987 --> 00:15:03,387 Name tags. Name tags, anyone? 241 00:15:03,457 --> 00:15:05,982 [Takashi] Right there. Right there, a picture. 242 00:15:06,059 --> 00:15:09,722 Excuse me. Would you like a"Hello. My name is" tag? 243 00:15:09,796 --> 00:15:11,667 How nerdy can you get? 244 00:15:11,801 --> 00:15:15,396 Lois, what on earth are all these nerds doing here? 245 00:15:15,471 --> 00:15:17,405 They're Booger's friends. 246 00:15:17,473 --> 00:15:20,931 [Scoffs] Well, Aaron and Tippy must just be sick. 247 00:15:21,010 --> 00:15:23,672 Oh, Tippy seems okay, but it's killing my brother. 248 00:15:26,315 --> 00:15:28,249 Daddy. 249 00:15:28,317 --> 00:15:30,342 Hi. Lewis Skolnick, best man. 250 00:15:31,721 --> 00:15:35,122 - Figures. - Booger is just crazy about your daughter. 251 00:15:35,191 --> 00:15:38,422 He's gonna make a wonderful husband, and that's all that really matters. 252 00:15:38,494 --> 00:15:40,462 - Right. - Once you get to know Booger... 253 00:15:40,530 --> 00:15:43,192 - you'll be very happy with what you see. - [Slurping] 254 00:15:43,266 --> 00:15:46,394 I'll be very happy when I get away from you. 255 00:15:46,469 --> 00:15:49,370 [Guffawing] 256 00:15:49,439 --> 00:15:52,033 [Man] Aaron, my dear man, I'm so sorry. 257 00:15:52,108 --> 00:15:55,202 [Chattering Continues] 258 00:15:55,278 --> 00:16:00,238 You know, Booger, I do sense a bit of friction with your future father-in-law. 259 00:16:00,316 --> 00:16:02,250 - Friction? - Mm-hmm. 260 00:16:02,318 --> 00:16:04,252 He hates my guts. 261 00:16:05,888 --> 00:16:08,880 Say hi to Stan. Stan, this is Lewis. Come in. 262 00:16:08,958 --> 00:16:11,256 I read you. I read you, Lewis. Over. 263 00:16:11,327 --> 00:16:14,387 Yeah, I just wanted to see how you're feeling, man. 264 00:16:14,464 --> 00:16:17,763 Oh, pretty good. Just such a bummer I got the chicken pox. 265 00:16:17,834 --> 00:16:21,270 I guess I was just too cool to get them as a kid. 266 00:16:21,337 --> 00:16:24,670 You know, sometimes we just have to play the cards we're dealt. 267 00:16:24,740 --> 00:16:29,177 Yeah. You're always so perceptive, Lewis. I wish I could be like you. 268 00:16:29,245 --> 00:16:31,372 Give it time, Stan. Over and out. 269 00:16:34,350 --> 00:16:38,753 - [Slurping] - Excuse me, Mr. Lewis, Mr. Booger. 270 00:16:38,821 --> 00:16:41,449 Why is that buttocks squished up against the window... 271 00:16:41,524 --> 00:16:43,890 - like a pressed Devonshire ham? - [Screams] 272 00:16:43,960 --> 00:16:46,861 Ogre! 273 00:16:48,264 --> 00:16:50,789 - Lewey! - Ogre! How are you? 274 00:16:50,867 --> 00:16:53,097 - How you doing? See it? - Yeah, I saw it. 275 00:16:53,169 --> 00:16:55,194 - That's Ogre. - Oh. 276 00:16:55,271 --> 00:16:58,934 - Ogre! - Little buddy! How you doing? 277 00:16:59,008 --> 00:17:01,806 [Chanting] Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! 278 00:17:01,878 --> 00:17:06,212 Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! 279 00:17:06,282 --> 00:17:08,876 This is the worst party we've ever been to. Good night. 280 00:17:08,951 --> 00:17:12,717 This was unbelievable. Thank God my daughter's a lesbian. 281 00:17:14,123 --> 00:17:16,717 - Ogre! Ogre! - Hey, did you see my buns? 282 00:17:16,792 --> 00:17:21,126 - Uh-oh. - What? Who is it? 283 00:17:21,197 --> 00:17:23,791 - Mylan Whitfield. - Huh? 284 00:17:23,866 --> 00:17:26,096 The chairman of the Republican party. 285 00:17:30,339 --> 00:17:32,807 Nice of you to come, Mylan. Could I get you a drink? 286 00:17:32,875 --> 00:17:35,571 The strongest one you've got. 287 00:17:35,645 --> 00:17:39,479 [Belching] 288 00:17:41,817 --> 00:17:44,980 [Belching Continues] 289 00:17:49,058 --> 00:17:52,687 - I think this is a record. - [Continues Belching] 290 00:17:52,762 --> 00:17:55,492 - [All Laughing] - [Ogre] The world's champ. 291 00:17:56,866 --> 00:17:59,198 I drink to that. 292 00:17:59,268 --> 00:18:02,431 Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. 293 00:18:02,505 --> 00:18:05,030 That's your future son-in-law. 294 00:18:05,107 --> 00:18:08,508 And now a very special treat. 295 00:18:10,046 --> 00:18:14,506 - My fiancée's turn. - Oh. 296 00:18:14,584 --> 00:18:19,180 Oh, no, Jeanie, please. Don't do it, please. Please, don't, please. 297 00:18:19,255 --> 00:18:23,351 Okay. Okay. 298 00:18:23,426 --> 00:18:25,223 Don't do it, please. Don't do it. 299 00:18:25,294 --> 00:18:28,525 [Gulps, Belches] 300 00:18:34,537 --> 00:18:38,735 - She's doing a good job. - [Mumbling, Belches] 301 00:18:38,808 --> 00:18:41,038 Booger must be so proud. 302 00:18:41,110 --> 00:18:43,806 - [Belching] - [Applause] 303 00:18:43,879 --> 00:18:45,813 - Wow! - Can you believe it? 304 00:18:48,651 --> 00:18:52,246 - Whoo! - She's got the croup. 305 00:18:53,823 --> 00:18:57,816 MyJeanie, she can belch with the best of them. 306 00:19:01,230 --> 00:19:05,189 Hey, your sorority sisters are here. It's the Omega Mu's. 307 00:19:05,267 --> 00:19:08,566 [All Mooing] 308 00:19:13,175 --> 00:19:15,370 They're all voters, Mylan. 309 00:19:16,545 --> 00:19:18,240 Booger! Booger! Booger! 310 00:19:18,314 --> 00:19:22,341 Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. 311 00:19:22,418 --> 00:19:24,682 Why are they always chanting? 312 00:19:24,754 --> 00:19:29,987 You see, the younger generation today, they- they- 313 00:19:30,059 --> 00:19:32,323 I think it's kind of fun. 314 00:19:32,395 --> 00:19:34,420 You're wearing two different socks. 315 00:19:35,765 --> 00:19:38,427 Well, I wanna welcome you all to the wedding... 316 00:19:38,501 --> 00:19:40,435 that none of us ever thought would happen. 317 00:19:40,503 --> 00:19:44,803 - [All Cheering] - I guess hell must have frozen over after all. 318 00:19:44,874 --> 00:19:47,468 [All Laughing] 319 00:19:47,543 --> 00:19:50,637 Come on now. 320 00:19:50,713 --> 00:19:52,772 - ♪♪ [Rimshot] - Boom! 321 00:19:52,848 --> 00:19:56,545 But, Jeanie, you don't know about this... 322 00:19:56,619 --> 00:20:00,055 but I'm going to sing a little song for you. 323 00:20:00,122 --> 00:20:05,287 It's something that I think of whenever I think of you. 324 00:20:14,537 --> 00:20:17,097 ♪♪ [Keyboard] 325 00:20:19,141 --> 00:20:23,202 ♪♪ [Singing Softly] 326 00:20:35,191 --> 00:20:39,423 ♪♪ [Singing Continues] 327 00:21:08,257 --> 00:21:10,953 - Sorry, Aaron, gotta go. - You will come to the bridal shower? 328 00:21:11,026 --> 00:21:13,551 No can do. Important engagement. 329 00:21:13,629 --> 00:21:16,689 ♪♪ [Singing Continues] 330 00:21:16,766 --> 00:21:19,428 - I thought you were gonna do something. - I'm working on it. 331 00:21:19,502 --> 00:21:23,370 - I'm gonna start first thing in the morning. - Start now, doofus. 332 00:21:27,376 --> 00:21:29,037 - ♪♪ [Singing Stops] - Oh. 333 00:21:32,615 --> 00:21:34,879 [Applause] 334 00:21:34,950 --> 00:21:37,077 For those of you in the audience here... 335 00:21:37,153 --> 00:21:40,680 who are blues aficionados, we have a little, uh- 336 00:21:40,756 --> 00:21:43,691 It's a little bit dissonant, but I think you'll like it... 337 00:21:43,759 --> 00:21:46,626 'cause with the fluteophones, it's kind of special. 338 00:21:46,695 --> 00:21:49,562 Flutes up. 339 00:21:49,632 --> 00:21:53,591 A-one, a-two, a-one, two, three. 340 00:21:53,669 --> 00:21:55,660 - Even I can't take this. Good night. - ♪♪ [Playing] 341 00:22:02,945 --> 00:22:06,847 ♪♪ [Singing] 342 00:22:12,555 --> 00:22:15,547 ♪♪ [Singing Continues] 343 00:22:18,928 --> 00:22:22,728 ♪♪ [Dance Rock] 344 00:22:36,879 --> 00:22:39,143 - Hey, can I cut in? - Sure thing. 345 00:22:41,350 --> 00:22:44,080 If I may. 346 00:22:44,153 --> 00:22:48,749 Betty, pregnant women have always made me boggy. 347 00:22:48,824 --> 00:22:52,692 Oh, Booger. You're just incorrigible. 348 00:22:52,761 --> 00:22:56,822 - I try to be. - Excuse me. 349 00:22:56,899 --> 00:23:01,131 I just want you to know that I'm really happy for you. 350 00:23:01,203 --> 00:23:03,967 Booger lets you be yourself... 351 00:23:04,039 --> 00:23:07,566 and I really like what I see. 352 00:23:07,643 --> 00:23:11,579 I can't believe this is coming out of the mouth of my perfect sister. 353 00:23:11,647 --> 00:23:15,743 Who knows, maybe this wedding has really brought us together. 354 00:23:17,453 --> 00:23:19,921 I love you, Jeanie. 355 00:23:19,989 --> 00:23:22,082 I love you, Gaylord. 356 00:23:22,157 --> 00:23:25,649 - [Sobbing] - Oh! 357 00:23:28,597 --> 00:23:32,089 Oh, girls. 358 00:23:32,167 --> 00:23:35,398 Once you go nerd, you'll never go back. 359 00:23:35,471 --> 00:23:39,032 [All Laughing] 360 00:23:39,108 --> 00:23:42,271 I would just die for your cheekbones. 361 00:23:42,344 --> 00:23:44,403 Oh. 362 00:23:49,551 --> 00:23:51,849 Hey, handsome. 363 00:23:53,188 --> 00:23:55,349 Wanna dance? 364 00:23:55,424 --> 00:23:57,892 [Exhales] Sure. 365 00:24:07,703 --> 00:24:10,763 [Booger] Good show, Harold. 366 00:24:25,688 --> 00:24:28,350 What a prenuptial party. 367 00:24:28,424 --> 00:24:32,383 Really, so enjoyable. Just tremendous. [Whistles] 368 00:24:38,467 --> 00:24:41,994 Jeanie and her friends are having a good time. 369 00:24:42,071 --> 00:24:44,562 Everybody who's important is gone. 370 00:24:44,640 --> 00:24:48,440 - What an embarrassment. - No, no, no, look. Your sister's still here. 371 00:24:51,747 --> 00:24:55,080 My sister stays to the end of supermarket openings. 372 00:24:55,150 --> 00:24:58,085 [Booger] Hey, Takashi, whatever happened to Gilbert? 373 00:24:58,153 --> 00:25:00,553 - Mrs. Humphrey, can I have this dance? - Yes? 374 00:25:00,622 --> 00:25:03,489 - Oh, I don't think I could. - I think you could. 375 00:25:03,559 --> 00:25:06,528 [Laughs] There's a little nerd in everyone. 376 00:25:08,097 --> 00:25:10,190 There's no nerd in me, pal. 377 00:25:19,174 --> 00:25:21,165 [Belches] 378 00:25:21,243 --> 00:25:24,178 Yo! Mama-san! 379 00:25:25,981 --> 00:25:29,508 - [Kiaiing] - Lois, wait! 380 00:25:47,302 --> 00:25:49,463 [Tippy] Hey, you nerds really know how to party. 381 00:25:49,538 --> 00:25:51,904 [Lewis Guffaws] 382 00:25:51,974 --> 00:25:53,965 [Booger] I'm just getting started, baby. 383 00:25:54,043 --> 00:25:57,069 Romeo, have you seen Chip? 384 00:25:57,146 --> 00:26:01,344 Oh, sure, that's exactly what I have on my mind, worrying about where Chip is. 385 00:26:01,417 --> 00:26:05,114 Oh, gee, where could Chip be? Here, Chip, Chip, Chip, Chip. 386 00:26:05,187 --> 00:26:07,849 Here, Chip, Chip, Chip, Chip, Chip, Chip. 387 00:26:07,923 --> 00:26:10,585 How would you like to lose about 12 teeth? 388 00:26:11,660 --> 00:26:13,594 Bitch. 389 00:26:13,662 --> 00:26:16,722 ♪♪ [Continues] 390 00:26:20,235 --> 00:26:22,760 [Chip] I'm looking for dirt, scandal... 391 00:26:22,838 --> 00:26:24,863 some deviant behavior... 392 00:26:24,940 --> 00:26:28,467 a skeleton in a closet that would be so horrible... 393 00:26:28,544 --> 00:26:30,774 it would break up a wedding. 394 00:26:30,846 --> 00:26:32,780 And money's no object. 395 00:26:32,848 --> 00:26:35,180 - [Chair Squeaks] - How did you find me? 396 00:26:35,250 --> 00:26:37,013 Let's just say through a friend. 397 00:26:37,086 --> 00:26:39,111 And why do you wanna ruin the wedding? 398 00:26:39,188 --> 00:26:41,986 Well, my father-in-law's thinking of getting into politics... 399 00:26:42,057 --> 00:26:44,048 and the groom would ruin his chances. 400 00:26:44,126 --> 00:26:46,617 If the father-in-law doesn't enter the political arena... 401 00:26:46,695 --> 00:26:48,720 you don't take over the family business. 402 00:26:48,797 --> 00:26:53,530 Yes. Well, I suppose that would happen, but that's not my major concern. 403 00:26:54,770 --> 00:26:58,900 - It's nerds, isn't it? - How did you know that? 404 00:26:58,974 --> 00:27:02,137 - I'm a detective. - Wow. 405 00:27:02,211 --> 00:27:05,738 I had a case with nerds a couple months ago. 406 00:27:05,814 --> 00:27:09,215 - They can be very slippery. - [Chair Squeaks] 407 00:27:09,284 --> 00:27:11,047 How do I know you're any good? 408 00:27:11,120 --> 00:27:13,588 [Sighs] You know the dirt on the royal family? 409 00:27:13,655 --> 00:27:16,215 You? 410 00:27:16,291 --> 00:27:18,384 Well, let's do business. 411 00:27:18,460 --> 00:27:20,394 - [Chair Squeaks] - All right. 412 00:27:24,366 --> 00:27:26,960 - What's the groom's name? - Uh, Dudley Dawson. 413 00:27:27,035 --> 00:27:29,230 But his friends call him "Booger." 414 00:27:30,806 --> 00:27:33,673 - Well, that's the first thing in our favor. - What's that? 415 00:27:33,742 --> 00:27:39,271 With a name like Booger, it shouldn't be too hard to get dirt on him. Right? 416 00:27:40,382 --> 00:27:42,316 [Trevor] Good night, Mr. Ogre. 417 00:27:44,353 --> 00:27:46,321 [Ogre] Good night, Trevor. 418 00:27:46,388 --> 00:27:48,413 [Takashi] Good night, Lamar. 419 00:27:48,490 --> 00:27:50,924 - [Stan] Good night, Judy. - [Judy] Good night, Stan. 420 00:27:50,993 --> 00:27:53,359 [Lamar] Good night, Takashi. 421 00:27:55,130 --> 00:27:58,964 - [Toenail Clangs In Can] - Betty. 422 00:27:59,034 --> 00:28:01,867 - Hmm? - Why can't we videotape the birth? 423 00:28:01,937 --> 00:28:05,270 I just don't want the whole world to see my privates. 424 00:28:05,340 --> 00:28:07,808 But I've already bought a high-definition... 425 00:28:07,876 --> 00:28:10,208 Dolby stereo, 3-D helmet cam. 426 00:28:11,813 --> 00:28:14,475 You know you'll show the video to someone. 427 00:28:14,550 --> 00:28:17,747 I'm really surprised at you, Betty. 428 00:28:17,819 --> 00:28:21,448 Not having the confidence to think that I wouldn't show the video to someone. 429 00:28:21,523 --> 00:28:23,457 [Sighs] 430 00:28:25,527 --> 00:28:27,461 - Maybe I would. - [Toenails Clanging] 431 00:28:28,630 --> 00:28:30,962 - I probably would. - Hmm. 432 00:28:31,033 --> 00:28:34,662 I definitely would, but it's only because no one is prouder than I am... 433 00:28:34,736 --> 00:28:37,204 of our unborn fetal son. 434 00:28:37,272 --> 00:28:39,297 And your privates. [Guffaws] 435 00:28:39,374 --> 00:28:42,639 Lewis Tarada Skolnick! 436 00:28:42,711 --> 00:28:44,702 Ow! Betty, I was only kidding. 437 00:28:44,780 --> 00:28:47,214 - Ow! - Are you all right, honey? 438 00:28:47,282 --> 00:28:50,581 I'm fine. I just have a little side ache. 439 00:28:53,989 --> 00:28:56,355 You are so wonderful. 440 00:28:56,425 --> 00:28:58,655 I bet I'm the only woman in America... 441 00:28:58,727 --> 00:29:02,163 to have a certified midwife as a husband. 442 00:29:02,231 --> 00:29:06,725 That's because I don't want anybody but me delivering our unborn baby son. 443 00:29:06,802 --> 00:29:09,327 - [Giggles] - Hey, Betty. 444 00:29:09,404 --> 00:29:12,168 - Hmm? - Would you like to have some pickles and ice cream? 445 00:29:12,241 --> 00:29:14,106 Pickles, ice cream. Pickles, ice cream. 446 00:29:14,176 --> 00:29:16,440 I would love some pickles and ice cream. 447 00:29:16,511 --> 00:29:19,002 - Oh, yea! - I'll be right back. 448 00:29:21,350 --> 00:29:24,513 Oh, honey, I don't want you to go now. It's after 3:00. 449 00:29:24,586 --> 00:29:27,350 If my unborn fetal son and my beloved wife... 450 00:29:27,422 --> 00:29:30,016 want pickles and ice cream, I don't care what time it is. 451 00:29:30,092 --> 00:29:32,424 - [Giggles] - Eskimo kiss? 452 00:29:32,494 --> 00:29:34,553 - Butterfly. - Eskimo. 453 00:29:34,630 --> 00:29:38,031 - Butterfly. Butterfly. - Eskimo. Eskimo. 454 00:29:40,869 --> 00:29:43,360 I love you, you big nerd. 455 00:29:43,438 --> 00:29:47,704 I know you are, but what am I? [Guffaws] 456 00:29:50,178 --> 00:29:53,147 - Booger. - Hey, Lewis. Where you going? 457 00:29:53,215 --> 00:29:55,581 I was just gonna take a cruise in the party truck... 458 00:29:55,651 --> 00:29:57,585 and get Betty some pickles and ice cream. 459 00:29:57,653 --> 00:30:01,419 - You're gonna make the best father. - You really think so? 460 00:30:02,491 --> 00:30:04,240 I know so. 461 00:30:04,374 --> 00:30:06,399 Hey, you wanna come with? 462 00:30:06,476 --> 00:30:08,740 No. 463 00:30:10,613 --> 00:30:13,241 Are you feeling all right, Booger? 464 00:30:13,316 --> 00:30:15,511 Lewis, I'm gonna say something to you... 465 00:30:15,585 --> 00:30:18,247 that I would never tell anybody else in the world. 466 00:30:23,526 --> 00:30:25,460 I'm a little scared. 467 00:30:25,528 --> 00:30:27,519 Scared? You? 468 00:30:29,199 --> 00:30:31,258 Well, what are you scared about, Booger? 469 00:30:33,470 --> 00:30:37,338 I've been single a long time, Lewis. 470 00:30:37,407 --> 00:30:40,774 I've enjoyed a lot of Mu's. 471 00:30:40,844 --> 00:30:42,778 My life has been blessed. 472 00:30:42,846 --> 00:30:46,441 [Chuckles] And they've enjoyed you too, pal. 473 00:30:46,516 --> 00:30:49,644 Now I'm hanging it all up. 474 00:30:49,719 --> 00:30:54,850 But what happens if I run into a woman who really curdles my blood? 475 00:30:54,924 --> 00:30:57,722 'Cause you know me, Lewis. You know how it is. 476 00:30:57,794 --> 00:31:02,060 Our eyes meet across a crowded room, and bammo. 477 00:31:03,066 --> 00:31:05,466 We're talkin' "nutso" time. 478 00:31:05,535 --> 00:31:09,437 Bananas. We're talking out of my brains... 479 00:31:09,506 --> 00:31:12,737 can't control the faculties, the mind follows the genitals time. 480 00:31:12,809 --> 00:31:14,743 Because that's what happens, Lewis... 481 00:31:14,811 --> 00:31:20,306 anytime I meet a woman who really makes me wanna take a bath. 482 00:31:20,383 --> 00:31:24,183 Well, I have manly urges too, Booger, like any other red-blooded American male. 483 00:31:24,254 --> 00:31:27,155 Well, of course you do. How do you handle it? 484 00:31:27,223 --> 00:31:29,817 I just think of Betty or computers. 485 00:31:29,893 --> 00:31:33,351 No, see, not me. 486 00:31:35,265 --> 00:31:39,395 I'm like a train wreck on the Long Island Railroad. 487 00:31:39,469 --> 00:31:44,998 I may see trouble down the tracks, but this trainman can't pull the switch. 488 00:31:45,075 --> 00:31:47,669 Well, nobody likes to party more than I do, Booger. 489 00:31:47,744 --> 00:31:50,008 Except for maybe you. 490 00:31:50,080 --> 00:31:54,540 But my life got so much better since I married Betty. And yours is going to too. 491 00:31:54,617 --> 00:31:57,017 Provided you're ready to compromise... 492 00:31:57,087 --> 00:32:00,545 and work hard, incredibly hard, on your impending union with Jean. 493 00:32:00,623 --> 00:32:02,784 You have to work really hard, huh? 494 00:32:02,859 --> 00:32:07,023 It's not any harder than, say, designing cornering velocities for theJapanese Bullet Train. 495 00:32:07,097 --> 00:32:11,124 But you should get some sleep. Tomorrow is a huge day for you. 496 00:32:11,201 --> 00:32:15,069 You got the all-you-can-eat nerd bridal shower at the Rump Roast Room. 497 00:32:15,138 --> 00:32:19,336 And then there's my surprise theme bachelor stag party at night. 498 00:32:19,409 --> 00:32:21,377 You forgot about that, didn't you? 499 00:32:22,445 --> 00:32:24,413 You're gonna nail me, aren't you? 500 00:32:24,481 --> 00:32:27,712 You're darn tootin'. See ya, Booger. 501 00:32:27,784 --> 00:32:30,753 - Hey, Lewis. - Yeah? 502 00:32:31,821 --> 00:32:33,721 Thanks. 503 00:32:35,992 --> 00:32:37,926 I love you, Booger. 504 00:32:39,229 --> 00:32:41,163 I love you too. 505 00:33:03,052 --> 00:33:04,986 Bibs, anyone? 506 00:33:05,054 --> 00:33:06,988 [Lewis] Don't be bashful. It's all you can eat. 507 00:33:07,056 --> 00:33:10,924 So, Russia's in, you know, bad shape. 508 00:33:10,994 --> 00:33:14,088 Decentralization of the economy and the privatization of industry... 509 00:33:14,164 --> 00:33:16,632 while, you know, leading to these personal freedoms... 510 00:33:16,699 --> 00:33:18,724 it's cost some great hardships. 511 00:33:18,801 --> 00:33:23,170 That's why I, Ogre, I think I'm gonna go over there and see if I can help them out. 512 00:33:23,239 --> 00:33:25,764 You know what I mean? That's no good. 513 00:33:28,578 --> 00:33:31,308 [Laughing] 514 00:33:31,381 --> 00:33:33,440 [Gasps] 515 00:33:33,516 --> 00:33:36,644 - What the fu- - Say "cheese." 516 00:33:36,719 --> 00:33:40,951 - [Both] Cheese. - [Takashi] Okay, now stay there. 517 00:33:43,026 --> 00:33:46,621 - Lewis to Stan. Come in, Stan. - I read you Lewis. Over. 518 00:33:46,696 --> 00:33:49,790 Uh, listen. This is your 2:00 pox report. How you feeling, Stan? 519 00:33:49,866 --> 00:33:52,630 Much better now, thanks toJudy. 520 00:33:52,702 --> 00:33:55,796 If you don't take care of the pox, they can scab and leave scars. 521 00:33:55,872 --> 00:33:58,363 - Over and out. - Honey. 522 00:33:58,441 --> 00:34:01,672 - Hmm? - What's Trevor Gulf doing? 523 00:34:01,744 --> 00:34:04,304 L-I think he's mooning us. 524 00:34:04,380 --> 00:34:06,314 That's not a moon. That's the San Joaquin Valley. 525 00:34:06,382 --> 00:34:10,512 - Trevor, no! - Oh, big smile. 526 00:34:10,587 --> 00:34:14,387 Trevor, come on. It isn't nice to moon. 527 00:34:14,457 --> 00:34:17,756 - Oh, it isn't? - No, it isn't. 528 00:34:17,827 --> 00:34:21,285 - Mr. Ogre mooned. - Well, you see, Trevor... 529 00:34:21,364 --> 00:34:24,162 Mr. Ogre's a converted nerd, okay? 530 00:34:24,234 --> 00:34:28,364 He used to be a jock. He's still a little rough around the edges. 531 00:34:28,438 --> 00:34:31,100 Jacques? Is he from France? 532 00:34:33,509 --> 00:34:35,704 [Guffaws] 533 00:34:35,778 --> 00:34:39,646 - My condolences, Aaron. - You gotta take the good with the bad. 534 00:34:39,716 --> 00:34:42,947 - Sorry, Aaron. - Hey, if it's not one thing, it's another. 535 00:34:43,987 --> 00:34:46,182 Mylan, thank you for coming. 536 00:34:46,256 --> 00:34:48,190 Thank you for sending the limo for me. 537 00:34:48,258 --> 00:34:51,022 Thank you for sending the bauble to my secretary. 538 00:34:51,094 --> 00:34:54,257 And the entire party thanks you for sending the check. 539 00:34:54,330 --> 00:34:57,561 Just being a good Republican, Mylan. 540 00:34:57,634 --> 00:35:00,194 Come along, dear. 541 00:35:00,270 --> 00:35:02,431 Nice seeing you again, Flo. 542 00:35:05,675 --> 00:35:09,042 - I've done a little homework on Dudley "Booger" Dawson. - Oh, yeah? 543 00:35:09,112 --> 00:35:11,444 - He's an attorney all right. - Well, that's good. 544 00:35:11,514 --> 00:35:13,607 A personal injury attorney. 545 00:35:13,683 --> 00:35:16,243 He's an ambulance chaser? 546 00:35:17,453 --> 00:35:20,115 It just gets worse. 547 00:35:20,189 --> 00:35:23,625 - Well, it'll all be over soon. - What are you gonna do? 548 00:35:23,693 --> 00:35:26,355 You just get ready for a bombshell. 549 00:35:30,300 --> 00:35:32,768 Ogre, thanks, man. 550 00:35:32,835 --> 00:35:35,895 That's-That's really thoughtful. 551 00:35:35,972 --> 00:35:37,906 It was really expensive. 552 00:35:37,974 --> 00:35:43,674 So, uh, I guess it's on to Lewis and Betty's present, huh? 553 00:35:49,852 --> 00:35:52,047 - [All Gasping] - Oh, wow! 554 00:35:52,121 --> 00:35:56,251 - [Woman] Look at that. - A ski exerciser! 555 00:35:56,326 --> 00:35:59,352 I've been dying for one of these! 556 00:35:59,429 --> 00:36:02,956 - Have you? - Boss! 557 00:36:03,032 --> 00:36:06,263 They now have anything ever sold on an infomercial. 558 00:36:06,336 --> 00:36:08,270 Oh, shut up, Aaron. 559 00:36:08,338 --> 00:36:12,297 Hey, everybody, everybody, Booger's parents are here! 560 00:36:12,375 --> 00:36:16,812 Mr. And Mrs. Booger! Mr. And Mrs. Booger! 561 00:36:16,879 --> 00:36:20,110 Mom? Dad! 562 00:36:23,453 --> 00:36:25,944 They look like they just fell off a pickle truck. 563 00:36:26,022 --> 00:36:29,219 - Chip! - Folks, everybody, excuse me. 564 00:36:29,292 --> 00:36:31,226 These are my parents. 565 00:36:36,699 --> 00:36:40,135 We're so glad that you're here, Mr. And Mrs. Dawson. 566 00:36:43,606 --> 00:36:46,234 I am flabbergasted. 567 00:36:46,309 --> 00:36:50,473 We would both like to thank all of you from the bottom of our hearts... 568 00:36:50,546 --> 00:36:53,811 for this wonderful shower you're throwing us. 569 00:36:53,883 --> 00:36:57,979 It's probably the first shower he's ever had. [Guffaws] 570 00:37:01,224 --> 00:37:04,591 No, he showered regularly. Every other night in the summer... 571 00:37:04,660 --> 00:37:06,594 and weekly in the winter. 572 00:37:15,405 --> 00:37:19,671 Well, I don't know about you guys, but I'm ready to jump off the dock. 573 00:37:19,742 --> 00:37:24,111 - Yeah! - Hold it, everybody. 574 00:37:24,180 --> 00:37:27,172 I'd like to offer my toast. 575 00:37:27,250 --> 00:37:29,718 [All] Yeah. Yeah. 576 00:37:33,923 --> 00:37:36,790 To Booger's love child. 577 00:37:39,529 --> 00:37:41,861 Love child? What are you talking about? 578 00:37:43,533 --> 00:37:46,058 I'm talking about the daughter you had 12 years ago... 579 00:37:46,135 --> 00:37:49,229 out of wedlock, with a young woman in Sandusky, Ohio. 580 00:37:49,305 --> 00:37:52,035 All right, Booger! Yeah, bud! 581 00:37:54,977 --> 00:38:00,882 You have a child that my little girl doesn't know about? 582 00:38:00,950 --> 00:38:03,475 I am appalled, Booger. Appalled. 583 00:38:03,553 --> 00:38:06,716 - And so is my wife. Right? See? - But- 584 00:38:06,789 --> 00:38:08,723 I don't know anything about this. 585 00:38:08,791 --> 00:38:11,589 I have no child in Sandusky, Ohio. 586 00:38:11,661 --> 00:38:14,323 - The hell you don't! - [All Gasp] 587 00:38:14,397 --> 00:38:17,059 This is a fairly specious charge. 588 00:38:17,133 --> 00:38:19,567 Where's your proof, Chip? 589 00:38:19,635 --> 00:38:22,570 - Yeah, where's your proof, Chip? - [All] Yeah. 590 00:38:24,307 --> 00:38:26,241 My proof is right here. 591 00:38:28,077 --> 00:38:32,070 I'd like you to meet Detective First Class Chad Penrod. 592 00:38:32,148 --> 00:38:36,608 Detective Penrod, does Dudley Dawson, alias Booger... 593 00:38:36,686 --> 00:38:41,646 have or have not a 12-year-old child in Sandusky, Ohio? 594 00:38:41,724 --> 00:38:44,625 I checked the birth records in Sandusky and found... 595 00:38:44,694 --> 00:38:47,128 that on March 19, 1981... 596 00:38:47,196 --> 00:38:49,596 a certain Heidi Dawson... 597 00:38:49,665 --> 00:38:52,327 was born to a Miss Cathleen Turtle- 598 00:38:52,401 --> 00:38:56,303 Turtletaub and a Mr. Dudley Dawson. 599 00:38:56,372 --> 00:38:58,806 - Cool. - Wait! 600 00:38:58,875 --> 00:39:02,436 If the parents of the alleged love child were never married... 601 00:39:02,512 --> 00:39:07,279 why isn't the child's name Heidi Turtletaub? 602 00:39:07,350 --> 00:39:11,787 Exactly. Why isn't the child's name Heidi Turtletaub? 603 00:39:11,854 --> 00:39:14,118 - Yes. - [Neck Bones Crack] 604 00:39:15,458 --> 00:39:17,392 Beats me. 605 00:39:17,460 --> 00:39:20,896 If the child were born to an unmarried mother... 606 00:39:20,963 --> 00:39:26,333 wouldn't the so-said mother haven't given the aforementioned daughter her last name? 607 00:39:27,703 --> 00:39:29,637 [Penrod] Well, I do know this. 608 00:39:29,705 --> 00:39:32,731 The child's nickname is Booger. 609 00:39:32,808 --> 00:39:35,174 - [All Gasp] - Yeah! 610 00:39:35,244 --> 00:39:37,474 I think we should leave, Jeanie. 611 00:39:37,547 --> 00:39:40,175 Oh. 612 00:39:40,249 --> 00:39:43,343 Do you wanna marry a man who doesn't tell you that he has a child? 613 00:39:43,419 --> 00:39:45,979 Who knows what he'll lie about next? 614 00:39:46,055 --> 00:39:48,683 You saw The Crying Game. 615 00:39:48,758 --> 00:39:51,591 How do we know he even is a man? 616 00:39:51,661 --> 00:39:53,686 - [Gasps] - [All Gasping] 617 00:39:53,763 --> 00:39:56,493 Don't you touch me! 618 00:39:56,632 --> 00:39:58,998 Get your hands off me! Don't you touch me! 619 00:39:59,068 --> 00:40:00,592 I caught you red-handed! 620 00:40:00,670 --> 00:40:02,604 - Get off of me! - Hey, break it up! 621 00:40:02,672 --> 00:40:06,608 - Break it up! - I'm gonna tell everybody! Don't you get me started. 622 00:40:06,676 --> 00:40:08,610 - I heard- - Word! 623 00:40:08,678 --> 00:40:12,045 I can't believe what got into you two. This is supposed to be a happy occasion. 624 00:40:13,883 --> 00:40:16,750 I'm especially surprised at you, Lamar. 625 00:40:16,819 --> 00:40:19,083 Now what was going on? 626 00:40:19,155 --> 00:40:22,022 Well, Chip was crackin' on Booger's parents. 627 00:40:22,091 --> 00:40:24,457 Crackin' on my parents? 628 00:40:26,128 --> 00:40:28,289 What kind of cracks, Chip? 629 00:40:28,364 --> 00:40:31,458 Booger. 630 00:40:31,534 --> 00:40:35,265 - As your best man, I strongly advise just let it go. - I'm not going to let it go. 631 00:40:35,338 --> 00:40:38,535 On the other hand, I'm prepared to explore other avenues with you as well. 632 00:40:38,608 --> 00:40:41,805 - What kind of cracks, Chip? - [Stammering] 633 00:40:41,877 --> 00:40:45,574 Chip said that your mama was so ugly, that the Elephant Man paid to see her. 634 00:40:51,721 --> 00:40:57,091 The point is you have a 12-year-old daughter in Sandusky, Ohio! 635 00:40:57,159 --> 00:41:01,095 This has nothing to do with my having a child in Sandusky, Ohio. 636 00:41:01,163 --> 00:41:03,393 That isn't what this is about at all. 637 00:41:04,834 --> 00:41:08,326 - This is because I'm a nerd. - [All Gasping] 638 00:41:09,505 --> 00:41:11,439 And it has been since the beginning. 639 00:41:11,507 --> 00:41:13,441 Mm-hmm. 640 00:41:13,509 --> 00:41:16,910 Why else would someone rummage through my private life with a detective? 641 00:41:16,979 --> 00:41:21,916 And then announce this... detestable fabrication... 642 00:41:21,984 --> 00:41:25,579 this- this- this tissue of lies... 643 00:41:25,655 --> 00:41:28,852 - on the happiest day of my life? - Oh, Booger. 644 00:41:30,526 --> 00:41:33,427 Hath not a nerd eyes? 645 00:41:34,930 --> 00:41:37,194 When you prick us, do we not bleed? 646 00:41:38,668 --> 00:41:42,502 I am tired of the reckless allegations... 647 00:41:42,571 --> 00:41:44,596 the snide snickering... 648 00:41:44,674 --> 00:41:47,939 the talking behind backs, the sly innuendoes... 649 00:41:48,010 --> 00:41:50,535 the looking down on us. 650 00:41:53,783 --> 00:41:56,877 We are what we are. 651 00:41:56,952 --> 00:41:59,318 - Aren't we? - [Nerds] We are! 652 00:41:59,388 --> 00:42:02,949 - And we're proud of what we are. - [Nerds] We are! 653 00:42:03,025 --> 00:42:06,358 And we are not about to allow ourselves... 654 00:42:06,429 --> 00:42:09,489 to be intimidated by a bunch of- 655 00:42:09,565 --> 00:42:12,466 Booger, don't say it! 656 00:42:12,535 --> 00:42:17,495 - Say it, Booger! - Nouveau-riche pigs! 657 00:42:19,408 --> 00:42:21,342 [Ogre] There you go. 658 00:42:22,745 --> 00:42:27,341 You have... the audacity... 659 00:42:27,416 --> 00:42:30,146 to utter the most... 660 00:42:30,219 --> 00:42:33,814 morally reprehensible slur to these... 661 00:42:35,157 --> 00:42:37,921 fine, upstanding... 662 00:42:37,993 --> 00:42:40,484 self-made businesspeople. 663 00:42:42,431 --> 00:42:45,127 Shame on you, Booger. 664 00:42:45,201 --> 00:42:47,260 Shame on all of you nerds. 665 00:42:47,336 --> 00:42:48,826 Ogre, no! 666 00:43:00,282 --> 00:43:02,512 The prosecution rests. 667 00:43:02,585 --> 00:43:05,679 I've had it with you nerds! 668 00:43:07,123 --> 00:43:09,114 All right, everyone, just cool it! 669 00:43:12,361 --> 00:43:15,888 - Oh, what the hell. - We've got too much class for this kind of crap. 670 00:43:16,932 --> 00:43:19,196 - Booger! - Jeanie! 671 00:43:19,268 --> 00:43:24,365 - Booger! - [Takashi Yells] 672 00:43:42,658 --> 00:43:45,252 [Woman Shrieking] 673 00:44:06,949 --> 00:44:10,180 So you might have a daughter in Sandusky, Ohio, huh? 674 00:44:13,222 --> 00:44:16,089 [Sighs] I don't know. 675 00:44:17,159 --> 00:44:19,150 It's certainly possible. 676 00:44:20,596 --> 00:44:25,863 God knows my seed is as strong as an Alaskan salmon. 677 00:44:27,503 --> 00:44:30,529 And I partied pretty hard in the early '80s. 678 00:44:32,007 --> 00:44:33,941 In Sandusky? 679 00:44:35,444 --> 00:44:39,039 Apart from Akron, I probably spent more time in Sandusky... 680 00:44:39,114 --> 00:44:41,207 than any place on earth. 681 00:44:43,886 --> 00:44:45,820 Damn it! 682 00:44:48,824 --> 00:44:51,952 Everything was going so great. Now it's ruined. 683 00:44:56,131 --> 00:44:58,497 Booger. 684 00:45:01,704 --> 00:45:03,638 Your wedding isn't ruined. 685 00:45:05,374 --> 00:45:07,308 What are you talking about? 686 00:45:07,376 --> 00:45:11,904 We just had a food fight. 687 00:45:13,182 --> 00:45:16,743 People don't have... 688 00:45:18,220 --> 00:45:22,156 food fights at their... 689 00:45:22,224 --> 00:45:24,158 bridal showers! 690 00:45:24,226 --> 00:45:26,217 But I did. 691 00:45:27,596 --> 00:45:30,156 Some nouveau-riche guy... 692 00:45:30,232 --> 00:45:32,996 Iooked like he could have been a banker... 693 00:45:33,068 --> 00:45:36,037 his mashing... 694 00:45:36,105 --> 00:45:41,168 handfuls of garni up my nostrils! 695 00:45:43,078 --> 00:45:45,012 [Sighs] I know things look bleak. 696 00:45:46,482 --> 00:45:48,347 But they've been bleak before. 697 00:45:48,481 --> 00:45:51,450 Do you remember at Adams College? 698 00:45:51,517 --> 00:45:53,610 We were exiled from the dorms... 699 00:45:53,686 --> 00:45:56,280 and forced to live in the gymnasium. 700 00:45:56,355 --> 00:45:58,585 Do you remember in Fort Lauderdale... 701 00:45:58,658 --> 00:46:02,219 when we were persecuted into subjugation and incarcerated? 702 00:46:02,295 --> 00:46:06,425 How about when Orrin Price framed me... 703 00:46:06,499 --> 00:46:08,592 for embezzling... 704 00:46:08,668 --> 00:46:12,832 Adams College computer research funds? 705 00:46:12,905 --> 00:46:17,274 We may have been subjected to the yoke of nerd oppression before... 706 00:46:17,343 --> 00:46:21,575 - but we're not gonna be subjected to it again! - [Bangs Mug] 707 00:46:21,647 --> 00:46:25,640 This wedding is not over! The son of a gun has just begun! 708 00:46:28,087 --> 00:46:30,954 Come on, pal. 709 00:46:31,023 --> 00:46:34,720 [Crying] 710 00:46:34,794 --> 00:46:36,853 [Ringing] 711 00:46:42,001 --> 00:46:45,459 [Booger] Meet me at the Wood Bridge in half an hour. 712 00:46:48,374 --> 00:46:50,365 Please? 713 00:46:53,012 --> 00:46:55,003 Hello? 714 00:46:56,649 --> 00:47:01,018 I'm sorry. Is this 555-4264? 715 00:47:02,355 --> 00:47:05,950 Knock, knock. Is this a private party? 716 00:47:07,126 --> 00:47:09,060 Have a drink, Chip. 717 00:47:09,128 --> 00:47:11,790 Thanks, Dad-Aaron. 718 00:47:11,864 --> 00:47:14,059 [Sighs] 719 00:47:14,133 --> 00:47:18,092 I'm taking a lot of flack from this from my wife. 720 00:47:18,171 --> 00:47:21,038 I thought the food fight was a nice plus though. 721 00:47:21,107 --> 00:47:25,976 This is a career day for you, Chip. As a matter of fact... 722 00:47:26,045 --> 00:47:29,503 this is the first good thing I could ever remember you doing. 723 00:47:29,582 --> 00:47:31,982 Come on. I've done lots of good things. 724 00:47:32,051 --> 00:47:33,985 Name one. 725 00:47:34,053 --> 00:47:37,648 - Are you serious? - Name one. 726 00:47:39,358 --> 00:47:41,826 Well, there was, uh- 727 00:47:41,894 --> 00:47:43,828 Uh- 728 00:47:43,896 --> 00:47:47,559 You don't do anything and I pay you a fortune. But look. 729 00:47:47,633 --> 00:47:50,158 You made up for everything. You're the man... 730 00:47:50,236 --> 00:47:53,672 who drove the Booger man out of my daughter's life. 731 00:47:58,444 --> 00:48:00,571 Daddy, I have to talk to you. 732 00:48:00,646 --> 00:48:02,546 I'm so confused. 733 00:48:04,483 --> 00:48:07,680 First of all, I just wanna thank you for being so concerned about me. 734 00:48:07,753 --> 00:48:10,017 I know in my heart... 735 00:48:10,089 --> 00:48:12,990 you only want what's best for me... 736 00:48:13,059 --> 00:48:15,550 no matter what you say or do or how you behave. 737 00:48:15,628 --> 00:48:17,789 [Sighs] 738 00:48:17,863 --> 00:48:21,822 I sure do love that Booger though. 739 00:48:21,901 --> 00:48:25,098 I can't believe he's got a kid he never told me about. 740 00:48:29,342 --> 00:48:31,333 [Groans] 741 00:48:32,979 --> 00:48:35,607 Kids-you gotta love 'em. 742 00:48:40,186 --> 00:48:44,122 It, um- It is true, Chip? 743 00:48:44,190 --> 00:48:46,385 Is what true? 744 00:48:48,060 --> 00:48:51,928 That, um, he has a child... 745 00:48:51,998 --> 00:48:54,057 with an unwed mother and all that? 746 00:48:54,133 --> 00:48:57,625 Yeah, sure it's true. The detective I hired found it. 747 00:48:57,703 --> 00:49:02,402 Because it, uh- it wouldn't be good if it wasn't true. 748 00:49:02,475 --> 00:49:07,503 - It's true. - Then, uh-Then it's good. 749 00:49:07,580 --> 00:49:11,846 - 'Cause it's true. - Right. If it's true, it's good. 750 00:49:11,917 --> 00:49:14,750 And, uh, I feel good about that. 751 00:49:14,820 --> 00:49:16,651 Good. 752 00:49:38,244 --> 00:49:40,735 - Booger! - Jeanie! 753 00:49:43,749 --> 00:49:46,718 Let's go to our secret spot so no one will see us. 754 00:49:48,654 --> 00:49:52,647 - I love you, Booger. - Oh, I love you too. 755 00:49:52,725 --> 00:49:56,957 But marriage is about trust. No secrets from each other, remember? 756 00:49:57,029 --> 00:49:59,054 I don't have any secrets. 757 00:50:00,266 --> 00:50:02,700 Well, what about that child in Sandusky, Ohio? 758 00:50:02,768 --> 00:50:06,636 I don't have a child in Sandusky, Ohio! 759 00:50:07,973 --> 00:50:10,806 Why would Detective Penrod say that you did? 760 00:50:10,876 --> 00:50:12,810 Well, I don't know! 761 00:50:12,878 --> 00:50:15,608 I don't even know who Detective Penrod is! 762 00:50:15,681 --> 00:50:19,981 I'm a condemned man and I don't have a child! 763 00:50:22,388 --> 00:50:25,152 I believe you, Booger. 764 00:50:26,826 --> 00:50:28,760 You do? 765 00:50:28,828 --> 00:50:31,820 Yes, because marriage is about trust. 766 00:50:31,897 --> 00:50:37,199 And I trust you... completely. 767 00:50:37,269 --> 00:50:39,203 [Laughs] 768 00:50:39,271 --> 00:50:43,037 All I know is that I love you and I think we should continue the wedding. 769 00:50:43,109 --> 00:50:45,942 Oh, Booger, I- I don't know what to do. 770 00:50:46,011 --> 00:50:50,914 L- I don't know. I don't know what's right or wrong anymore. 771 00:50:52,351 --> 00:50:54,945 I, uh- 772 00:50:55,020 --> 00:50:57,079 I know it's a day early, but... 773 00:51:00,025 --> 00:51:03,392 I'd like you to read my valentine. 774 00:51:11,804 --> 00:51:13,795 Open it up. 775 00:51:14,807 --> 00:51:16,866 A cow. 776 00:51:20,579 --> 00:51:23,639 "An empty spot was on my heart... 777 00:51:23,716 --> 00:51:26,913 "until I met you, O Valentine. 778 00:51:26,986 --> 00:51:30,444 "Then the spot filled in. My heart was whole. 779 00:51:30,523 --> 00:51:35,017 "I could love for the first time in my life... 780 00:51:35,094 --> 00:51:39,121 "now that you are going to become... 781 00:51:42,168 --> 00:51:44,159 my wife." 782 00:51:48,040 --> 00:51:53,137 - The hell with my dad! - That's exactly what I'd hoped you'd say. 783 00:51:53,212 --> 00:51:55,908 [Lowing] 784 00:51:55,981 --> 00:51:58,609 Again. 785 00:51:58,684 --> 00:52:02,620 [Lowing] 786 00:52:04,156 --> 00:52:08,320 [Laughs] I can't tell you what it does to hear you moo again. 787 00:52:08,394 --> 00:52:11,795 - [Lowing] - [Mooing] 788 00:52:11,864 --> 00:52:14,799 [Mooing] 789 00:52:14,867 --> 00:52:17,597 - Oh, Booger! - Jeanie! 790 00:52:19,171 --> 00:52:22,265 [Mooing] 791 00:52:30,082 --> 00:52:32,744 - It's on! - What's on? 792 00:52:32,818 --> 00:52:35,309 The wedding is on again! 793 00:52:35,387 --> 00:52:39,255 First it's on, then it's off. Now it's on again. 794 00:52:39,325 --> 00:52:41,555 I am on an emotional roller coaster. 795 00:52:41,627 --> 00:52:44,619 - I am not a yo-yo. - [Scoffs] 796 00:52:51,036 --> 00:52:54,631 How can the wedding be on? We all can't even be in the same room together. 797 00:52:54,707 --> 00:52:56,732 Never in the history of weddings... 798 00:52:56,809 --> 00:52:59,710 has there ever been a clearer case of incompatibility. 799 00:52:59,778 --> 00:53:04,477 Aaron, Jeanie is thrilled. Think about her for once. 800 00:53:04,550 --> 00:53:07,781 I am thinking about her. The man is a liar and a child deserter. 801 00:53:07,853 --> 00:53:11,448 If she goes through with this wedding, I'm not gonna have anything to do with it! 802 00:53:11,524 --> 00:53:14,789 Zero, nothing, nada, zip! 803 00:53:14,860 --> 00:53:17,693 - [Chair Banging] - Ow! 804 00:53:17,763 --> 00:53:21,164 Okay, anybody who feels that Booger could have... 805 00:53:21,233 --> 00:53:24,396 an illegitimate child in Sandusky, Ohio, raise your right hands. 806 00:53:29,108 --> 00:53:31,235 [Shouts] Opposed? 807 00:53:31,310 --> 00:53:33,710 - You don't think it's possible? - No, I do not. 808 00:53:33,779 --> 00:53:36,077 Booger may be Booger, but he always took precautions. 809 00:53:36,148 --> 00:53:40,585 - That is right. He always did wear condoms. - Oh. Condom. 810 00:53:40,653 --> 00:53:43,349 - So he couldn't have a child. - No way. 811 00:53:43,422 --> 00:53:46,789 [Car Approaching] 812 00:53:46,859 --> 00:53:51,228 - Harold, where you going? - I don't know, but I would guess Aunt Lois's. 813 00:53:51,297 --> 00:53:53,458 Are you scoring, Harold? 814 00:53:53,532 --> 00:53:56,865 I certainly wouldn't tell you if I was. 815 00:53:56,936 --> 00:54:00,372 But I guarantee you I ain't going over there for breakfast. 816 00:54:00,439 --> 00:54:03,033 [All Laughing] 817 00:54:06,312 --> 00:54:08,678 [Horn Honking] 818 00:54:10,749 --> 00:54:13,377 - It's on! - [Together] What's on? 819 00:54:13,452 --> 00:54:15,420 The wedding! 820 00:54:16,855 --> 00:54:18,846 [Horn Honking] 821 00:54:24,697 --> 00:54:27,063 I thought you told me the love child was real. 822 00:54:27,132 --> 00:54:29,930 I didn't say she was real. I said it was a great idea. 823 00:54:30,002 --> 00:54:35,099 But it hasn't turned out to be such a great idea, has it? 824 00:54:35,174 --> 00:54:39,304 If Aaron finds out I've lied to him, I'm dead. He's gonna fire me. 825 00:54:39,378 --> 00:54:43,109 Hey, if he fires you, isn't he also cutting off his own daughter? 826 00:54:43,182 --> 00:54:47,118 He's gonna give her an allowance that I'm not allowed to touch. 827 00:54:47,186 --> 00:54:50,280 Well, that'd do it. 828 00:54:50,356 --> 00:54:54,315 - [Moans] - Relax. There are plenty of ways to ruin a wedding. 829 00:54:54,393 --> 00:54:56,953 - Such as? - It's easy. 830 00:54:57,029 --> 00:54:59,122 You know what bachelor parties are like. 831 00:54:59,198 --> 00:55:02,326 Beautiful women, liquor flowing, raw naked temptation. 832 00:55:02,401 --> 00:55:04,631 Booger's bound to succumb. 833 00:55:04,703 --> 00:55:08,264 According to his bio, he's got the self-control of a brahma bull. 834 00:55:08,340 --> 00:55:10,604 How would we- How would we show proof of this? 835 00:55:10,676 --> 00:55:13,270 We'll make one of America's... 836 00:55:13,345 --> 00:55:16,041 least funny home videos. 837 00:55:20,819 --> 00:55:22,810 Do it. 838 00:55:24,523 --> 00:55:28,118 Hey. There's a horse here named Big Booger. 839 00:55:39,004 --> 00:55:42,030 [Groans] I missed the food fight. 840 00:55:42,107 --> 00:55:45,304 And now I'm gonna miss Booger's surprise theme bachelor party. 841 00:55:45,377 --> 00:55:47,868 Well, not really, Stan. 842 00:55:47,946 --> 00:55:51,347 May I present to you and Judy a special Valentine's Day treat. 843 00:55:51,417 --> 00:55:55,717 Try these on for size. Now, tonight when the bachelor party starts... 844 00:55:55,788 --> 00:55:59,986 you simply turn on the TV, hit the function button on your remote. 845 00:56:00,059 --> 00:56:03,586 You might not be there, but you'll have the next best thing- 846 00:56:03,662 --> 00:56:07,257 Skolnick Vision. [Guffaws] 847 00:56:07,332 --> 00:56:09,266 - Bye, guys. - Thanks, Lewis. 848 00:56:09,334 --> 00:56:11,996 - Thanks. - [Door Opens, Closes] 849 00:56:12,071 --> 00:56:14,005 [Both Guffawing] 850 00:56:14,073 --> 00:56:17,065 - ♪♪ [Dance Rock] - [Shouting, Chattering] 851 00:56:19,078 --> 00:56:22,309 - Oh, I made it! - Great shot, Takashi. You owe me another 20 bucks. 852 00:56:22,381 --> 00:56:25,214 - Huh? - Sometimes when you win, you lose. Let's play for your watch. 853 00:56:25,284 --> 00:56:27,445 - Okay, thank you. - You're welcome. 854 00:56:27,519 --> 00:56:31,319 Red ball, middle pocket and you can call me London Fats. [Chuckles] 855 00:56:32,624 --> 00:56:35,024 [Party Favors Squealing] 856 00:56:35,094 --> 00:56:38,120 Here you go. A bumper pool tournament! 857 00:56:38,197 --> 00:56:40,859 What an original idea for a bachelor party! 858 00:56:40,933 --> 00:56:43,265 I knew that you would love it, Booger. 859 00:56:43,335 --> 00:56:46,270 Is there gonna be a girlie show? 860 00:56:46,338 --> 00:56:48,465 Mr. Dawson, that would be sexist. 861 00:56:48,540 --> 00:56:51,805 We believe it's possible to be entertained without demeaning women. 862 00:56:51,877 --> 00:56:55,938 That's nice. But personally, I'd prefer a little skin. 863 00:56:57,416 --> 00:57:01,250 Hey, fellas, I got winners. [Chuckles] 864 00:57:02,921 --> 00:57:05,947 He's got a lot of nerve showing his face around here. 865 00:57:06,024 --> 00:57:08,686 - Temper, temper. - Don't worry about it, Booger. 866 00:57:08,761 --> 00:57:11,628 We got him under 24-hour surveillance. 867 00:57:11,697 --> 00:57:14,598 There's nothing he can do that we don't know about. 868 00:57:17,035 --> 00:57:18,969 Hey, no lofting, Harold! 869 00:57:19,037 --> 00:57:22,734 Nouveau riche! Nouveau riche! Nouveau riche! 870 00:57:22,808 --> 00:57:25,299 - Nouveau riche! Nouveau riche! - [Gargles] 871 00:57:25,377 --> 00:57:29,245 I really expected Aaron to be here tonight. 872 00:57:29,314 --> 00:57:31,509 He doesn't want anything to do with the wedding. 873 00:57:31,583 --> 00:57:34,780 He might have extended me the courtesy of allowing me to know that. 874 00:57:34,853 --> 00:57:36,787 Nouveau riche! Nouveau riche! 875 00:57:36,855 --> 00:57:40,256 All right, all right, all right. All right! 876 00:57:40,325 --> 00:57:42,190 Nouveau- 877 00:57:42,261 --> 00:57:45,059 I know we had a little trouble today... 878 00:57:45,130 --> 00:57:48,258 at the all-you-can-eat nerd bridal shower at the Rump Roast Room... 879 00:57:48,333 --> 00:57:50,528 but, hey, that's behind us now, right? 880 00:57:50,602 --> 00:57:52,968 - We're adults. - Hold it, everybody. 881 00:57:53,038 --> 00:57:55,939 Lewis is right. 882 00:57:56,008 --> 00:57:59,136 Even I've been a bit of a recalcitrant during this wedding... 883 00:57:59,211 --> 00:58:02,840 but now that I've gotten to know... Booger... 884 00:58:02,915 --> 00:58:06,544 I realize that you and Jeanie are a perfect couple. 885 00:58:06,618 --> 00:58:10,782 And I know that it's only the first step... 886 00:58:10,856 --> 00:58:15,520 - ♪♪ [Dance Rock] - But I'm hoping that you will accept... 887 00:58:15,594 --> 00:58:17,528 my dove of peace. 888 00:58:17,596 --> 00:58:21,293 - [Excited Chattering] - [Party Favors Squealing] 889 00:58:23,602 --> 00:58:26,366 - Miss Modem! - [All Cheering] 890 00:58:28,273 --> 00:58:32,369 - Miss Numbers. - Come on! 891 00:58:32,444 --> 00:58:34,344 [Sighs] 892 00:58:34,413 --> 00:58:36,904 Miss Mainframe. 893 00:58:36,982 --> 00:58:41,214 - Leave it to Chip to be sexist. - Me, me, me! 894 00:58:41,286 --> 00:58:43,481 - Miss Communication. - [Gasps] 895 00:58:45,257 --> 00:58:47,657 You know, they are sort of enjoyable. 896 00:58:47,726 --> 00:58:50,490 - Miss Floppy Disk. - [Booger Moaning] 897 00:58:59,605 --> 00:59:02,039 - I love you! - Come on! 898 00:59:02,107 --> 00:59:05,099 - [All Shouting] - [Party Favors Squealing] 899 00:59:13,018 --> 00:59:15,851 Hey, hey, hey. 900 00:59:15,921 --> 00:59:18,515 - I'll take care of him. - Go get him. 901 00:59:18,590 --> 00:59:22,526 - Hi, Booger. I'm your present. - [Growls] 902 00:59:22,594 --> 00:59:27,031 ♪♪ [Continues] 903 00:59:31,103 --> 00:59:33,867 [Moans] You feel so good! 904 00:59:40,545 --> 00:59:43,309 I can't take no more! 905 00:59:47,452 --> 00:59:49,716 [Both Guffawing] 906 00:59:51,957 --> 00:59:54,824 [Man] Take it off! 907 00:59:54,893 --> 00:59:57,088 [Cheering] 908 01:00:00,999 --> 01:00:03,229 [Guffawing Continues] 909 01:00:26,980 --> 01:00:29,141 This Skolnick Vision is great... 910 01:00:29,216 --> 01:00:33,676 but still, it's not like actually being there. 911 01:00:36,690 --> 01:00:39,818 We could have our own stag party, Stan. 912 01:00:41,795 --> 01:00:44,787 ♪♪ [Continues] 913 01:00:59,479 --> 01:01:01,242 [Laughing] 914 01:01:04,384 --> 01:01:06,249 [All Shouting] 915 01:01:32,312 --> 01:01:35,713 We're gonna have some fun. A cool time. 916 01:01:36,917 --> 01:01:40,045 [Both Laughing] 917 01:01:40,120 --> 01:01:42,054 What is all this? 918 01:01:42,122 --> 01:01:45,353 This is anything that you want it to be, Booger. 919 01:01:53,600 --> 01:01:56,933 - ♪♪ [Conga Drum Beating] - [All] Hey! Hey! 920 01:01:57,004 --> 01:01:59,734 Hey! 921 01:01:59,806 --> 01:02:02,036 Hey! Hey! 922 01:02:02,109 --> 01:02:03,906 Hey! 923 01:02:03,977 --> 01:02:07,640 Hey! Hey! 924 01:02:11,285 --> 01:02:13,753 Did you do the nasty? 925 01:02:16,957 --> 01:02:19,289 I still got it. 926 01:02:19,359 --> 01:02:21,884 [All Shouting, Cheering] 927 01:02:23,797 --> 01:02:26,425 - All right, Booger! - ♪♪ [Conga Drum Resumes] 928 01:02:26,500 --> 01:02:30,527 Hey! Hey! Hey! 929 01:02:32,239 --> 01:02:36,232 This better be good to have woken us up in the middle of the night. 930 01:02:36,310 --> 01:02:40,576 I want you all to see what kind of lowlifeJeanie's going to marry. 931 01:02:40,647 --> 01:02:43,309 - [Booger] What is all this? - Booger? 932 01:02:43,383 --> 01:02:47,479 This is anything you want it to be, Booger. 933 01:02:47,554 --> 01:02:50,580 It's your last night as a single man. 934 01:02:50,657 --> 01:02:53,148 You're allowed to have a little fun, Booger. 935 01:02:53,226 --> 01:02:56,423 Oh, my God. 936 01:02:57,731 --> 01:03:01,827 - I can't do this. - Everybody's nervous at first. 937 01:03:01,902 --> 01:03:06,396 No, no, no. It's not that I'm nervous. 938 01:03:06,473 --> 01:03:10,307 I am not nervous. 939 01:03:10,377 --> 01:03:13,107 It's just that, um... 940 01:03:13,180 --> 01:03:17,480 Jeanie and I have a special bond... 941 01:03:17,551 --> 01:03:20,987 and I don't want to break it. 942 01:03:22,956 --> 01:03:25,356 Plus, you make me very nervous. 943 01:03:27,427 --> 01:03:31,158 So, if it's all right with you, perhaps we could just... 944 01:03:33,100 --> 01:03:36,069 sit here for a moment... 945 01:03:36,136 --> 01:03:38,730 so the guys outside won't... 946 01:03:38,805 --> 01:03:41,330 think that I'm the sissy that you know me to be. 947 01:03:43,343 --> 01:03:47,302 You're not a sissy, Booger. You're a mensch. 948 01:03:47,381 --> 01:03:51,147 - I think he acted very responsibly. - That's right, Chip. 949 01:03:52,753 --> 01:03:55,813 - [Smacks Butt] - Oh, yes, Mommy! 950 01:03:55,889 --> 01:03:59,484 - [Laughing] - Oh, I'm feeling better. 951 01:03:59,559 --> 01:04:04,053 - Ooh. - I've been very bad! 952 01:04:04,131 --> 01:04:06,156 I want a divorce, Chip. 953 01:04:06,233 --> 01:04:09,862 It must be a mistake. That's not me. 954 01:04:11,571 --> 01:04:14,540 Those nerds did it. I bet they did it on a computer or something. 955 01:04:14,608 --> 01:04:16,599 The things they can do with computers these days. 956 01:04:16,676 --> 01:04:21,670 No, I'm the one who made the mistake, Chip, when I married you. 957 01:04:23,483 --> 01:04:25,713 It was a little indiscretion at a bachelor party. 958 01:04:25,786 --> 01:04:28,380 It's not just the video, Chip! 959 01:04:28,455 --> 01:04:31,583 It's been all downhill since the honeymoon. 960 01:04:31,658 --> 01:04:35,025 You drink too much. You're mentally abusive to me. 961 01:04:35,095 --> 01:04:37,825 You fool around with other women. 962 01:04:37,898 --> 01:04:40,731 We have absolutely nothing in common. 963 01:04:40,801 --> 01:04:43,361 Maybe I could work a little harder. 964 01:04:43,437 --> 01:04:47,999 It makes me ill to think I've stayed with you as long as I have. 965 01:04:49,176 --> 01:04:52,145 [Gagging] 966 01:04:52,212 --> 01:04:54,407 Honey? 967 01:04:58,618 --> 01:05:00,916 You mind if I spoke to Chip alone? 968 01:05:00,987 --> 01:05:02,955 Oh, no, certainly. Come, sweetie. 969 01:05:03,023 --> 01:05:05,048 Gaylord! 970 01:05:10,163 --> 01:05:13,098 - This isn't good, Chip. - No. 971 01:05:13,166 --> 01:05:16,067 So I'm gonna kill you, Chip. 972 01:05:16,136 --> 01:05:19,230 You made a fool out of my daughter! 973 01:05:19,306 --> 01:05:21,240 I can explain everything. 974 01:05:21,308 --> 01:05:23,242 You lied about the illegitimate child... 975 01:05:23,310 --> 01:05:26,006 then you tried to frame Booger and you got caught! 976 01:05:26,079 --> 01:05:29,071 The illegitimate child will be here tomorrow morning at 10:00 a.m. 977 01:05:29,149 --> 01:05:31,310 She's on route right now from Sandusky, Ohio. 978 01:05:31,384 --> 01:05:34,285 There is no illegitimate child! You made it all up. 979 01:05:34,354 --> 01:05:37,414 The illegitimate child will be here at 10:00 in the morning! 980 01:05:37,491 --> 01:05:41,587 It better be! And you better get my daughter to forgive you... 981 01:05:41,661 --> 01:05:44,221 or there's no room for you in this family... 982 01:05:44,297 --> 01:05:48,631 or at Humphrey Industries, you pervert creep. 983 01:05:49,703 --> 01:05:51,637 [Door Slams] 984 01:05:55,509 --> 01:05:58,910 Oh, boy. That was one heck of a stag party last night, Lewis. 985 01:05:58,979 --> 01:06:00,913 I know I'll never forget it. 986 01:06:00,981 --> 01:06:04,940 I especially enjoyed your dance with the woman who removed her clothes, Mr. Booger. 987 01:06:05,018 --> 01:06:09,512 Trevor, remember there's a code of silence about what goes on at a stag party. 988 01:06:09,589 --> 01:06:12,080 - Code of silence? - So, reveal nothing... 989 01:06:12,158 --> 01:06:15,059 even if you're under hours of interrogation and torture. 990 01:06:15,128 --> 01:06:17,824 Wild horses couldn't drag it out of me. 991 01:06:17,898 --> 01:06:21,356 [Chuckles] Who aren't I supposed to tell? 992 01:06:36,616 --> 01:06:38,641 - Lewis. - Huh? 993 01:06:38,718 --> 01:06:40,982 There were women there, weren't there? 994 01:06:44,391 --> 01:06:46,382 Yes. 995 01:06:48,628 --> 01:06:50,687 Were they pretty? 996 01:06:52,232 --> 01:06:54,166 Yes. 997 01:06:54,234 --> 01:06:56,327 What'd you do with them? 998 01:06:58,872 --> 01:07:01,568 - The bunny hop. - That's all you did? 999 01:07:01,641 --> 01:07:05,168 - Yes. - Was the bunny hop? 1000 01:07:07,981 --> 01:07:10,916 Okay. You can still be my valentine then. 1001 01:07:14,754 --> 01:07:17,882 Oh, Betty. [Sighs] You shouldn't have. 1002 01:07:17,958 --> 01:07:20,426 - He's so cute. - He plays something too. 1003 01:07:20,493 --> 01:07:23,087 Beautiful. [Chuckles] 1004 01:07:23,163 --> 01:07:27,259 Hey, guys! It's Valentine's Day! 1005 01:07:27,334 --> 01:07:29,564 [All] Happy Valentine's Day! 1006 01:07:29,636 --> 01:07:31,570 Happy Valentine's. 1007 01:07:32,872 --> 01:07:36,035 Aaron, I hope you didn't have... 1008 01:07:36,109 --> 01:07:39,567 anything to do with videotaping Booger at the stag party. 1009 01:07:39,646 --> 01:07:42,114 Absolutely not. I wasn't even there. 1010 01:07:42,182 --> 01:07:44,150 Mm-hmm. 1011 01:07:44,217 --> 01:07:47,880 Aaron, if you don't participate in this wedding... 1012 01:07:47,954 --> 01:07:52,891 and make your daughter proud of you, I'm going to leave you. 1013 01:07:52,959 --> 01:07:55,257 You would leave me? 1014 01:07:55,328 --> 01:07:58,957 I have learned a lot from the nerds. Nerds speak their mind. 1015 01:07:59,032 --> 01:08:01,728 And from now on, I'm gonna speak my mind too. 1016 01:08:01,801 --> 01:08:05,737 If you don't support your daughter during this wedding, I'm outta here. 1017 01:08:05,805 --> 01:08:08,899 Fix your ascot. 1018 01:08:08,975 --> 01:08:11,910 It's not like I'm giving up that much. 1019 01:08:11,978 --> 01:08:13,946 What is that supposed to mean? 1020 01:08:14,014 --> 01:08:16,346 Aaron... 1021 01:08:16,416 --> 01:08:19,579 we haven't had sex since the Bush administration. 1022 01:08:19,653 --> 01:08:23,783 Well, it's hard to perform in that way when the Democrats are in power. 1023 01:08:23,857 --> 01:08:25,950 Ask any guy in this neighborhood. 1024 01:08:26,026 --> 01:08:28,620 That's why the sex hasn't been that hot lately. 1025 01:08:28,695 --> 01:08:31,960 Hot? I'd settle for lukewarm. 1026 01:08:32,032 --> 01:08:33,966 Zip your fly. 1027 01:08:35,435 --> 01:08:37,369 [Zipper Screeches] 1028 01:08:37,437 --> 01:08:42,067 It's not all my fault. How can I have sex when I have to spend all my time... 1029 01:08:42,142 --> 01:08:45,441 fixing my ascot, zippering my fly and matching my socks? 1030 01:08:45,512 --> 01:08:48,606 I can't be perfect for you anymore, Tippy. 1031 01:08:48,682 --> 01:08:50,809 It's too much pressure. 1032 01:08:50,884 --> 01:08:54,752 Aaron. I thought I was helping you. 1033 01:08:54,821 --> 01:08:57,483 I know how much you wanna be accepted by the blue bloods... 1034 01:08:57,557 --> 01:09:01,118 but you don't ever have to be perfect for me. 1035 01:09:01,194 --> 01:09:05,358 - I don't? - No. 1036 01:09:05,432 --> 01:09:09,698 I just want you to be the imperfect animal I fell in love with. 1037 01:09:09,769 --> 01:09:12,033 You mean it? 1038 01:09:12,105 --> 01:09:14,869 Absolutely. 1039 01:09:14,941 --> 01:09:17,034 Tippy. 1040 01:09:17,110 --> 01:09:18,975 Aaron. 1041 01:09:19,045 --> 01:09:21,843 Oh, Tippy. 1042 01:09:21,915 --> 01:09:23,644 Aaron! 1043 01:09:23,717 --> 01:09:26,686 Oh! Oh! Oh! 1044 01:09:31,324 --> 01:09:34,487 ♪♪ [Man Singing Softly] 1045 01:09:57,350 --> 01:10:02,378 ♪♪ [Singing Continues] 1046 01:10:16,402 --> 01:10:19,929 - [Guffawing] - ♪♪ [Fades] 1047 01:10:20,006 --> 01:10:22,304 I don't know if you're enjoying your wedding... 1048 01:10:22,375 --> 01:10:25,640 but it's been the best time of my life. 1049 01:10:25,712 --> 01:10:28,044 Nerds. Who knew? 1050 01:10:28,114 --> 01:10:31,242 - Where are you? - I'm over at Lois's. 1051 01:10:31,317 --> 01:10:34,115 Well, it's been special. 1052 01:10:34,187 --> 01:10:37,247 And thank God it's all going to end this afternoon. 1053 01:10:37,323 --> 01:10:40,884 It's all gonna end right now. 1054 01:10:40,960 --> 01:10:44,225 I'd like you to meet Heidi Dawson, your daughter. 1055 01:10:58,611 --> 01:11:00,772 - [Tippy] Oh, Aaron! - It's off! 1056 01:11:00,847 --> 01:11:02,747 [Gasps] 1057 01:11:02,816 --> 01:11:04,750 - What's off? - The wedding! 1058 01:11:04,818 --> 01:11:08,777 Booger's kid turned up. I told you there was a kid. 1059 01:11:14,194 --> 01:11:17,357 Guys, the wedding is off. 1060 01:11:17,430 --> 01:11:20,092 [Gasps] 1061 01:11:22,669 --> 01:11:24,830 It's not your fault. 1062 01:11:24,904 --> 01:11:29,705 You didn't do anything. You didn't ask to be born. 1063 01:11:29,776 --> 01:11:33,075 Would you like me to give you a push on those swings? 1064 01:11:33,146 --> 01:11:37,344 - No, thanks. - I'm a pretty good swing pusher. 1065 01:11:37,417 --> 01:11:39,351 I could give you an over the top. 1066 01:11:39,419 --> 01:11:42,286 I'm too old to be pushed on the swings. 1067 01:11:42,355 --> 01:11:47,418 Oh, right. Yeah, you're too old for that. 1068 01:11:47,493 --> 01:11:50,087 I used to hate it when people treated me like a baby. 1069 01:11:50,163 --> 01:11:52,996 - You did? - Oh, yeah. 1070 01:11:53,066 --> 01:11:55,660 So what do you like to do? 1071 01:11:55,735 --> 01:11:57,726 I'm afraid to tell you because... 1072 01:11:57,804 --> 01:12:01,433 if you don't like what I like, then you won't like me. 1073 01:12:04,978 --> 01:12:08,778 I think I'm going to like you... 1074 01:12:08,848 --> 01:12:10,816 no matter what you do... 1075 01:12:10,884 --> 01:12:14,320 as long as you live. 1076 01:12:14,387 --> 01:12:16,150 So there. 1077 01:12:36,976 --> 01:12:40,776 - Booger. - I'm here to seeJeanie. 1078 01:12:40,847 --> 01:12:44,214 I'm sorry, Booger, but Jeanie doesn't wanna speak with you. 1079 01:12:44,284 --> 01:12:46,684 I would like her to tell me that. 1080 01:12:46,753 --> 01:12:51,190 Well, if she doesn't wanna talk with you, she can't tell you then, can she? 1081 01:12:51,257 --> 01:12:54,954 Mrs. Humphrey, I am trying to be civil, but now I am not asking. 1082 01:12:55,028 --> 01:12:57,360 I am demanding to see your daughter. 1083 01:12:57,430 --> 01:12:59,898 Oh, Booger. 1084 01:12:59,966 --> 01:13:01,900 I'm sorry. 1085 01:13:16,783 --> 01:13:19,081 Oh, honey, help him. 1086 01:13:19,152 --> 01:13:22,815 Booger, every wedding has its crisis. This is yours. 1087 01:13:25,024 --> 01:13:28,790 A crisis would be easy compared to this. 1088 01:13:36,002 --> 01:13:37,970 Jeanie! 1089 01:13:38,037 --> 01:13:40,130 Oh, Booger. 1090 01:13:43,977 --> 01:13:48,311 Booger, the groom never stops pursuing his bride. 1091 01:13:50,450 --> 01:13:52,714 Never. 1092 01:14:02,061 --> 01:14:04,894 Hey, pal. Hey! What are you doing? 1093 01:14:04,964 --> 01:14:07,626 Hey, wait a minute! Hey, wait! [Whistles] 1094 01:14:13,006 --> 01:14:15,497 [Groans] 1095 01:14:23,082 --> 01:14:25,983 [Grunting] 1096 01:14:28,588 --> 01:14:30,579 Oh. 1097 01:14:42,368 --> 01:14:44,928 - Booger! - Darling! 1098 01:14:45,004 --> 01:14:46,995 Whoa! 1099 01:14:49,876 --> 01:14:52,003 So what if I have a child. 1100 01:14:52,078 --> 01:14:55,479 I'm so confused. I don't know what to think anymore. 1101 01:14:55,548 --> 01:14:57,641 Marry me, Jeanie. 1102 01:14:57,717 --> 01:15:00,015 I just need a few days to think about it. 1103 01:15:00,086 --> 01:15:02,975 And not get married on Valentine's Day? 1104 01:15:03,109 --> 01:15:06,010 I'm confused, Booger. I need time! 1105 01:15:06,079 --> 01:15:09,412 There was a time when getting married on Valentine's Day... 1106 01:15:09,482 --> 01:15:12,849 was the most important thing in the world to us. 1107 01:15:15,922 --> 01:15:17,890 Please go, Booger. 1108 01:15:17,957 --> 01:15:20,118 Is that what you really want? 1109 01:15:21,561 --> 01:15:26,396 No, not in my heart and not in my soul... 1110 01:15:26,466 --> 01:15:29,367 but I'm just so nuts over this, you know. 1111 01:15:29,435 --> 01:15:32,996 It's like I just need a little space. 1112 01:15:33,072 --> 01:15:35,700 Please, Booger? 1113 01:15:54,560 --> 01:15:56,551 ♪♪ [Singing Softly] 1114 01:16:07,940 --> 01:16:10,602 ♪♪ [Singing Softly] 1115 01:16:27,093 --> 01:16:30,256 ♪♪ [Both Singing] 1116 01:16:31,931 --> 01:16:33,865 ♪♪ [Singing Stops] 1117 01:16:33,933 --> 01:16:37,266 [Giggling] 1118 01:16:38,504 --> 01:16:40,438 It's on! 1119 01:16:40,506 --> 01:16:42,872 [Both] What's on? 1120 01:16:42,942 --> 01:16:45,103 The wedding! 1121 01:16:49,515 --> 01:16:51,506 Whoo-hoo! 1122 01:16:54,187 --> 01:16:57,623 [Sighs] I'm so glad the wedding is still on. 1123 01:16:57,690 --> 01:17:00,284 I was so wrong about nerds. 1124 01:17:00,359 --> 01:17:02,623 We nerds believe in forgiveness. 1125 01:17:04,597 --> 01:17:09,296 It's unreal how much you remind me of my friend, Bing. 1126 01:17:11,604 --> 01:17:14,971 I've never met anyone quite like you, Lamar. 1127 01:17:15,041 --> 01:17:16,838 [Giggles] 1128 01:17:16,909 --> 01:17:18,843 I'll take that as a compliment. 1129 01:17:18,911 --> 01:17:21,471 It is. 1130 01:17:34,660 --> 01:17:36,890 - Lewis. - Booger. 1131 01:17:41,267 --> 01:17:43,758 I'm gonna marry Cathleen Turtletaub. 1132 01:17:45,338 --> 01:17:48,171 Who's Cathleen Turtletaub? 1133 01:17:48,241 --> 01:17:50,232 Heidi's mother. 1134 01:17:50,309 --> 01:17:53,801 But you don't even know Cathleen Turtletaub. 1135 01:17:53,880 --> 01:17:57,043 I know, but it's the right thing to do. 1136 01:18:13,266 --> 01:18:16,258 This really isn't about Cathleen Turtletaub, is it? 1137 01:18:19,639 --> 01:18:21,607 No, it isn't. 1138 01:18:21,674 --> 01:18:26,111 This is about your zapatos becoming muy frío, no? 1139 01:18:26,178 --> 01:18:29,272 - Lewis. - Booger. 1140 01:18:29,348 --> 01:18:33,409 I didn't go through with it with the stripper last night. 1141 01:18:33,486 --> 01:18:36,819 - Oh, yeah, we know. - How do you know? 1142 01:18:36,889 --> 01:18:42,225 We kind of figured it out when we edited the videotape to ruin Chip's life. 1143 01:18:42,295 --> 01:18:45,389 Here I was passing up... 1144 01:18:45,464 --> 01:18:48,797 this mound of perfect. 1145 01:18:48,868 --> 01:18:53,771 I, who have never passed up anything in my life. 1146 01:18:53,839 --> 01:18:57,969 What is the matter with me, Lewis? 1147 01:18:58,044 --> 01:19:00,308 Where has the Booger I have known... 1148 01:19:00,379 --> 01:19:03,837 and loved... gone? 1149 01:19:13,025 --> 01:19:14,754 You ready? 1150 01:19:16,429 --> 01:19:18,659 Let's do it. 1151 01:19:22,601 --> 01:19:24,865 Please be my valentine. 1152 01:19:24,937 --> 01:19:29,340 You haven't given me a valentine in 10 years and this is what you come up with? 1153 01:19:29,408 --> 01:19:31,399 Pathetic! 1154 01:19:34,914 --> 01:19:37,109 [Nervous Chuckle] 1155 01:19:42,822 --> 01:19:45,120 [Whimpers] 1156 01:19:45,191 --> 01:19:48,627 Aaron, Tippy, the food fight was a sensational idea! 1157 01:19:48,694 --> 01:19:52,130 I'm gonna use the nerd theme at my wedding. [Guffaws] 1158 01:19:54,734 --> 01:19:56,793 Mylan. 1159 01:19:56,869 --> 01:20:00,965 I'm so sorry for all the trouble that you've experienced with this affair. 1160 01:20:01,040 --> 01:20:02,974 Thanks for coming to the wedding. 1161 01:20:03,042 --> 01:20:06,842 I do not care to judge you on the basis of the hell I've been through. 1162 01:20:06,912 --> 01:20:09,676 But I trust it was merely a horrific aberration... 1163 01:20:09,749 --> 01:20:12,718 and I expect the wedding to be quite different. 1164 01:20:16,288 --> 01:20:18,279 What? 1165 01:20:19,291 --> 01:20:21,759 Oh. 1166 01:20:21,827 --> 01:20:23,988 I trust that'll be enough. 1167 01:20:25,364 --> 01:20:28,800 Wouldn't have missed this wedding for the world. 1168 01:20:28,868 --> 01:20:31,894 Everybody, stand aside! Make way for the groom! 1169 01:20:31,971 --> 01:20:33,905 [Horn Beeping] 1170 01:20:33,973 --> 01:20:36,771 I would know that horn anywhere. 1171 01:20:42,114 --> 01:20:44,514 - Dad! - U. N! 1172 01:20:44,583 --> 01:20:47,313 - Hey, how are you? - Hey! 1173 01:20:47,386 --> 01:20:49,013 - Congratulations. - Thank you. 1174 01:20:49,088 --> 01:20:51,989 I wouldn't miss a nerd wedding for the world. 1175 01:20:52,058 --> 01:20:54,322 - How are you? - Lewis, how are you? 1176 01:20:54,393 --> 01:20:57,521 - How's my unborn grandson? - You mean your unborn fetal son? 1177 01:20:57,596 --> 01:21:00,463 [Both Guffawing] 1178 01:21:00,533 --> 01:21:02,467 Emergency! Excuse, please. 1179 01:21:02,535 --> 01:21:04,469 The bishop has a kidney stone. 1180 01:21:04,537 --> 01:21:06,630 He no make it to wedding! 1181 01:21:06,705 --> 01:21:10,197 How am I supposed to get married without a clergyman? 1182 01:21:10,276 --> 01:21:13,143 - I can marry you. - But I don't love you. 1183 01:21:13,212 --> 01:21:16,375 Oh. No, no. I took a correspondence course. 1184 01:21:16,449 --> 01:21:18,883 I'm a fully ordained Tilhoonian minister. 1185 01:21:18,951 --> 01:21:21,545 - You are? - U.N. 1186 01:21:21,620 --> 01:21:23,588 [Guffawing] 1187 01:21:33,466 --> 01:21:36,162 [Guffawing Continues] 1188 01:21:50,316 --> 01:21:52,807 Hi, Dad. 1189 01:21:52,885 --> 01:21:55,251 Shh. 1190 01:21:55,321 --> 01:21:57,255 - ♪♪ [Organ] - Sorry. 1191 01:22:11,570 --> 01:22:15,233 I've never seen a nerd wedding I didn't cry at. 1192 01:22:15,307 --> 01:22:18,003 This is just fabulous! [Crying] 1193 01:22:18,077 --> 01:22:20,011 What a wienie. 1194 01:22:25,618 --> 01:22:27,848 - [All Sigh] - Doesn't she look good? 1195 01:22:32,758 --> 01:22:35,727 [Both Crying] 1196 01:22:45,304 --> 01:22:47,738 [Alarm Blaring] 1197 01:22:49,208 --> 01:22:52,200 Lewis? 1198 01:22:53,612 --> 01:22:56,809 - Betty, you're having the baby! - Lewis! 1199 01:22:56,882 --> 01:23:00,045 - Oh. You're having the baby, honey. - Lewis. 1200 01:23:00,119 --> 01:23:03,987 Booger, quick. You guys. Lamar! Quick, come here! 1201 01:23:04,056 --> 01:23:06,581 Lamar. You guys. Booger. 1202 01:23:06,659 --> 01:23:08,820 - Lamar, quick, hurry! - [Booger] Don't panic! 1203 01:23:08,894 --> 01:23:11,920 Ogre. Ogre. We gotta carry her. 1204 01:23:11,997 --> 01:23:13,897 Okay. Here we go. 1205 01:23:13,966 --> 01:23:16,594 - That's it. Careful. - Okay, I got her. 1206 01:23:16,669 --> 01:23:20,105 - Okay, Lewey! Where, Lewey? - Come on. 1207 01:23:20,172 --> 01:23:23,938 - [All Chattering] - [Ogre] Where, Lewey? 1208 01:23:24,009 --> 01:23:26,944 [Alarm Continues Blaring] 1209 01:23:27,012 --> 01:23:29,674 [Alarm Stops] 1210 01:23:29,748 --> 01:23:32,911 Ogre, here. Put her head right here in the chopped liver. 1211 01:23:32,985 --> 01:23:36,216 - Lewis! - [Woman] She need an ice pack? 1212 01:23:37,590 --> 01:23:40,957 - Don't push. Don't push, Betty. - [Groans] 1213 01:23:41,026 --> 01:23:43,859 [All] Betty, don't push. Betty, don't push. 1214 01:23:43,929 --> 01:23:46,762 - Lewis! - Betty, don't push! Betty, don't push! 1215 01:23:46,832 --> 01:23:49,357 - Eee-hee-hoo. - Eee-hee-hoo! 1216 01:23:49,435 --> 01:23:52,199 Eee-hee-hoo! Eee-hee-hoo! 1217 01:23:52,271 --> 01:23:55,263 Eee-hee-hoo! Eee-hee-hoo! 1218 01:23:55,341 --> 01:23:58,367 Eee-hee-hoo! Eee-hee-hoo! 1219 01:23:58,444 --> 01:24:01,038 Heidi, where are you going? 1220 01:24:01,113 --> 01:24:03,547 I shouldn't be here. 1221 01:24:03,616 --> 01:24:06,050 Of course you should be here. 1222 01:24:06,118 --> 01:24:10,817 I'm not really your daughter. Chip got me from an orphanage. 1223 01:24:13,559 --> 01:24:17,655 Chip got you in an orphanage? 1224 01:24:17,730 --> 01:24:19,698 [Scoffs] 1225 01:24:21,233 --> 01:24:25,397 You, uh, rented an orphan? 1226 01:24:25,471 --> 01:24:29,430 It seemed like a good idea at the time. 1227 01:24:29,508 --> 01:24:32,306 I've been under a lot of stress lately. 1228 01:24:32,378 --> 01:24:34,744 I'm sorry. [Crying] 1229 01:24:36,649 --> 01:24:39,083 Daddy, don't! Don't! 1230 01:24:42,154 --> 01:24:45,055 - [Screams] - [Chanting] Betty, don't scream! 1231 01:24:45,124 --> 01:24:49,151 - Get off our land. - Betty, don't scream! 1232 01:24:49,228 --> 01:24:52,254 Aren't you forgetting something? 1233 01:24:52,331 --> 01:24:54,356 The keys to the B.M.W. 1234 01:24:54,433 --> 01:24:56,526 [Man] Cough 'em up. 1235 01:24:56,602 --> 01:25:00,595 - [Betty Screaming] - Wait, honey! 1236 01:25:03,509 --> 01:25:08,139 - [Betty] It's all your fault, Lewis! - You nerds did this to me. 1237 01:25:09,815 --> 01:25:11,976 But I'll get you... 1238 01:25:12,051 --> 01:25:15,578 if it's the last thing I do! 1239 01:25:15,654 --> 01:25:18,452 [Grunting] 1240 01:25:18,524 --> 01:25:21,391 - Bye, Chip. - Hmph! 1241 01:25:21,460 --> 01:25:23,394 [Man] Bye, Chip. 1242 01:25:23,462 --> 01:25:26,295 My next husband's going to be a nerd. 1243 01:25:31,036 --> 01:25:34,802 I, uh- I would like to make an announcement. 1244 01:25:34,873 --> 01:25:37,364 - [Betty Screams] - I have, uh... 1245 01:25:37,443 --> 01:25:40,378 been a jerk for this whole wedding. 1246 01:25:40,446 --> 01:25:43,472 You certainly have. 1247 01:25:43,549 --> 01:25:45,710 L-I never been around a nerd before... 1248 01:25:45,784 --> 01:25:48,548 and I guess, uh- 1249 01:25:48,620 --> 01:25:51,248 well, I guess I judged a book by its cover. 1250 01:25:51,323 --> 01:25:54,759 - [Groaning] - Booger. 1251 01:25:56,328 --> 01:25:58,922 I know you and Jeanie are gonna be very happy together... 1252 01:25:58,997 --> 01:26:02,262 because you know what you are and you're proud of it. 1253 01:26:05,537 --> 01:26:10,338 Well, I'm... sick of trying to be something I'm not. 1254 01:26:10,409 --> 01:26:12,673 Come on! Push, honey, push! 1255 01:26:12,745 --> 01:26:16,943 - Tippy. - [Nerds Chanting] Push, Betty, push! 1256 01:26:17,015 --> 01:26:20,348 - L- - Push, Betty, push! 1257 01:26:20,419 --> 01:26:22,410 L- 1258 01:26:24,723 --> 01:26:27,248 I am nouveau riche and I'm proud of it! 1259 01:26:30,863 --> 01:26:36,165 Mylan, if who I am isn't good enough for the Republican party of this state... 1260 01:26:36,235 --> 01:26:38,169 then to hell with the nomination! 1261 01:26:38,237 --> 01:26:41,297 - And that is the truth! - Push, Betty, push! 1262 01:26:41,373 --> 01:26:44,308 The nerds have brought my man back. 1263 01:26:44,376 --> 01:26:46,310 [All Sigh] 1264 01:26:46,378 --> 01:26:48,312 - [Gasps] - [Gasps] 1265 01:26:48,380 --> 01:26:50,644 - Push, Betty, push! Push, Betty, push! - [Screams] 1266 01:26:50,716 --> 01:26:54,083 - Push, Betty, push! - Wow. 1267 01:26:54,153 --> 01:26:57,611 Hey, hey, hey. Don't go. 1268 01:27:02,728 --> 01:27:05,822 What would you say if I said... 1269 01:27:05,898 --> 01:27:08,890 we should adopt Heidi? 1270 01:27:08,967 --> 01:27:10,730 [Betty Screams] 1271 01:27:10,803 --> 01:27:14,295 I would say I love you even more than I already do... 1272 01:27:14,373 --> 01:27:17,240 and I didn't think that was possible. 1273 01:27:19,711 --> 01:27:22,407 You gave up what you wanted to tell the truth. 1274 01:27:22,481 --> 01:27:25,245 I really admire that quality in a person. 1275 01:27:25,317 --> 01:27:28,753 Push, Betty, push! Push, Betty, push! 1276 01:27:28,821 --> 01:27:32,757 It's coming! It's coming, Betty! Come on. Push, honey, push! 1277 01:27:32,825 --> 01:27:35,760 - [Betty Grunting] - [Baby Crying] 1278 01:27:38,230 --> 01:27:41,256 [Crying Continues] 1279 01:27:41,333 --> 01:27:45,099 Oh. Oh, it's so beautiful. 1280 01:27:45,170 --> 01:27:48,071 Our son is born. 1281 01:27:48,140 --> 01:27:50,506 Kunta Skolnick! 1282 01:27:58,517 --> 01:28:00,883 Behold the nerd child. 1283 01:28:05,257 --> 01:28:09,216 I see before me two souls who desire to be joined together. 1284 01:28:09,294 --> 01:28:11,387 There's no greater challenge in life... 1285 01:28:11,463 --> 01:28:15,729 and also, no greater reward. [Guffaws] 1286 01:28:15,801 --> 01:28:18,634 [Both Crying] 1287 01:28:20,606 --> 01:28:24,838 Do you, Dudley Dawson, take this woman, Jean Lagarde Humphrey... 1288 01:28:24,910 --> 01:28:28,277 to be your lawful wife? 1289 01:28:28,347 --> 01:28:31,339 Before I answer that, I just want to say... 1290 01:28:31,416 --> 01:28:33,714 that this is the happiest moment of my life. 1291 01:28:37,389 --> 01:28:39,323 I do. 1292 01:28:39,391 --> 01:28:42,758 And do you, Jean Lagarde Humphrey, take this man, Dudley Dawson... 1293 01:28:42,828 --> 01:28:44,921 to be your lawfully wedded husband? 1294 01:28:44,997 --> 01:28:46,988 Excuse me. 1295 01:28:48,600 --> 01:28:51,933 I'm going to love you till the end of time. 1296 01:28:52,004 --> 01:28:55,030 [Guests Crying] 1297 01:28:55,107 --> 01:28:58,873 - I do. - Then with the power invested in me... 1298 01:28:58,944 --> 01:29:02,903 by the Tilhoon Institute of Home Learning Church... 1299 01:29:02,981 --> 01:29:05,677 I now pronounce you husband and wife. 1300 01:29:12,090 --> 01:29:14,251 [Guffaws] 1301 01:29:24,836 --> 01:29:28,704 Nerds forever! Forever nerds! 1302 01:29:28,774 --> 01:29:32,437 Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! 1303 01:29:32,511 --> 01:29:36,379 [Guests Chanting] Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! 1304 01:29:36,448 --> 01:29:39,611 ♪♪ [Dance Rock] 1305 01:29:43,388 --> 01:29:46,880 ♪♪ [Singing In Japanese] 1306 01:30:05,644 --> 01:30:08,010 - Ooh, ooh, ooh. - [Laughing] 1307 01:30:13,685 --> 01:30:16,347 Oh, Aaron. 1308 01:31:00,132 --> 01:31:04,535 ♪♪ [Singing Softly In English] 1309 01:31:15,814 --> 01:31:17,873 ♪♪ [Ends] 1310 01:31:21,620 --> 01:31:24,680 Lewis, thanks for everything. 1311 01:31:26,658 --> 01:31:28,990 It's gonna be a great year. 1312 01:31:30,662 --> 01:31:33,756 [All Guffawing] 1313 01:31:38,303 --> 01:31:41,295 [Chattering] 102420

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