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1
00:00:06,515 --> 00:00:09,117
Ah, good morning, Kelsey.
2
00:00:09,428 --> 00:00:10,584
- Good morning, Liza.
- Morning.
3
00:00:10,661 --> 00:00:12,622
- Good morning, Charles.
- Nice weather we're having.
4
00:00:12,699 --> 00:00:13,966
Did you enjoy
your walk to work?
5
00:00:14,043 --> 00:00:15,092
I did.
6
00:00:15,160 --> 00:00:16,278
I mean, I took a train.
7
00:00:16,355 --> 00:00:18,138
But the walking part was,
uh, really nice.
8
00:00:18,215 --> 00:00:20,269
Sunny, but cold.
I had a hat.
9
00:00:20,346 --> 00:00:23,301
Uh, okay, then.
See you in there.
10
00:00:23,378 --> 00:00:25,492
- Okay.
- Oh, my God.
11
00:00:25,569 --> 00:00:27,318
Ever since you two
pressed "pause,"
12
00:00:27,395 --> 00:00:29,490
you're so damn polite
to each other.
13
00:00:29,567 --> 00:00:32,814
It's like...
watching two butlers in love.
14
00:00:33,247 --> 00:00:36,453
The Frankfurt Book Fair
is next week,
15
00:00:36,530 --> 00:00:39,552
and this year I've decided
on a show of strength.
16
00:00:39,629 --> 00:00:42,306
So Kelsey, Zane,
Diana,
17
00:00:42,442 --> 00:00:44,963
and Liza,
get your passports in order.
18
00:00:45,040 --> 00:00:47,015
Surely you
don't need me to go.
19
00:00:47,092 --> 00:00:48,841
I'll stay here
and hold down the fort.
20
00:00:48,918 --> 00:00:50,252
Liza can help me.
21
00:00:50,350 --> 00:00:52,434
Nope.
This is a full court press.
22
00:00:52,511 --> 00:00:54,601
After the hit we took
with the L.L. Moore scandal,
23
00:00:54,678 --> 00:00:56,206
we have to be
more visible than ever.
24
00:00:56,283 --> 00:00:58,745
So Millennial, you got plenty
to brag about this year.
25
00:00:58,822 --> 00:01:02,968
But... Zane, this is a chance
for Empirical to close the gap,
26
00:01:03,045 --> 00:01:05,103
so work your contacts,
set up some meetings.
27
00:01:05,180 --> 00:01:07,207
A little, uh,
in-house competition
28
00:01:07,284 --> 00:01:08,619
is good for everyone.
29
00:01:10,731 --> 00:01:13,447
Why do I suddenly feel
like I'm in the minors?
30
00:01:13,631 --> 00:01:16,347
"Millennial, you're great.
Empirical, don't give up hope."
31
00:01:16,424 --> 00:01:19,095
- I'm sure he didn't mean it...
- Save it.
32
00:01:20,645 --> 00:01:23,017
Wow, so I'm going to Frankfurt.
33
00:01:24,007 --> 00:01:26,302
It's kind of exciting, right?
Don't get too excited.
34
00:01:26,379 --> 00:01:28,938
They found the most charmless
city in Europe to host it.
35
00:01:29,015 --> 00:01:31,213
It's like Buffalo,
with dumplings.
36
00:01:31,628 --> 00:01:33,072
Lovely language, German.
37
00:01:33,331 --> 00:01:34,872
Like a thousand cats coughing.
38
00:01:34,949 --> 00:01:37,361
So much for keeping
your distance from Charles.
39
00:01:40,936 --> 00:01:43,627
*YOUNGER*
Season 05 Episode 11
40
00:01:43,729 --> 00:01:46,418
*YOUNGER*
Episode Title: "Fraudlein"
41
00:01:46,495 --> 00:01:48,600
Synchronized by srjanapala
42
00:01:48,796 --> 00:01:50,870
Really guarding that thing
with your life, huh?
43
00:01:50,947 --> 00:01:53,615
Oh, yeah. I got a money belt
too for my traveler's checks.
44
00:01:53,692 --> 00:01:56,669
- Ooh, they still make those?
- They make me feel jet-setty.
45
00:01:56,746 --> 00:01:59,549
You got your hat
box and your steamer trunk too?
46
00:01:59,626 --> 00:02:01,319
Diana.
47
00:02:01,528 --> 00:02:04,494
Meine Babypuppe.
Aw.
48
00:02:04,845 --> 00:02:06,849
Are we ready to rock this town?
49
00:02:06,926 --> 00:02:08,943
Cheryl Sussman,
my liebchen.
50
00:02:09,020 --> 00:02:13,476
My BFFF.
Best Frankfurt Friend Forever.
51
00:02:13,553 --> 00:02:14,862
Drinks later
in the beer garden?
52
00:02:14,939 --> 00:02:16,097
Oh, I have had such a day.
53
00:02:16,174 --> 00:02:18,765
My pod in first class
wouldn't... pod,
54
00:02:18,842 --> 00:02:20,521
so I think I'm just gonna
lay low tonight.
55
00:02:20,598 --> 00:02:22,439
Nonsense, wingwoman.
56
00:02:22,523 --> 00:02:25,283
We're gonna party
like it's 1999.
57
00:02:25,576 --> 00:02:27,177
Remember 1999?
58
00:02:27,254 --> 00:02:30,156
You tried to take your
pantyhose off over your head
59
00:02:30,233 --> 00:02:31,724
at the Simon and Schuster
party.
60
00:02:31,801 --> 00:02:33,416
We were a lot younger.
61
00:02:33,715 --> 00:02:36,404
Oh, come on,
it's not how old you are,
62
00:02:36,481 --> 00:02:38,353
it's how old you feel.
63
00:02:38,799 --> 00:02:41,322
Or how old you say you are.
64
00:02:41,399 --> 00:02:44,193
Hello, ladies.
Cheryl Sussman.
65
00:02:44,454 --> 00:02:45,835
Plaza Publishing.
66
00:02:46,014 --> 00:02:47,271
Yeah, we've met.
67
00:02:47,348 --> 00:02:49,888
Oh, uh, you remember
my assistant, Liza?
68
00:02:49,965 --> 00:02:53,248
Of course I remember.
I remember everything.
69
00:02:53,490 --> 00:02:55,486
- Hi.
- Hi.
70
00:02:55,623 --> 00:02:57,314
Frankfurt, baby.
71
00:03:00,123 --> 00:03:02,065
Forgot you'd met
Cheryl Sussman.
72
00:03:02,142 --> 00:03:05,135
Uh, yeah, from my old life,
back at Random House.
73
00:03:05,212 --> 00:03:07,145
Oh, my God.
She knows?
74
00:03:07,222 --> 00:03:09,344
She plays dirty, Liza.
I know.
75
00:03:09,421 --> 00:03:10,899
Don't worry about it.
It's handled.
76
00:03:10,976 --> 00:03:13,781
Handled?
What's been handled?
77
00:03:13,858 --> 00:03:15,736
Never mind.
I don't wanna know.
78
00:03:21,654 --> 00:03:22,813
Yes.
79
00:03:22,936 --> 00:03:24,620
I just...
I can't believe I'm here.
80
00:03:24,697 --> 00:03:26,204
Besides Ireland last year...
81
00:03:26,281 --> 00:03:27,675
I mean, I've only been
to Europe once,
82
00:03:27,752 --> 00:03:29,744
and that was 20 years ago
for my honey...
83
00:03:32,109 --> 00:03:33,960
Suckle.
Honeysuckle birthday.
84
00:03:34,037 --> 00:03:36,517
You know, the thing where
every, uh, birthday
85
00:03:36,594 --> 00:03:38,712
is a flo... a flower?
86
00:03:38,833 --> 00:03:42,007
Y... you...
Seven is honeysuckle.
87
00:03:42,287 --> 00:03:44,892
Eight is Daisy.
88
00:03:45,091 --> 00:03:47,616
Ten is Tiger lily.
89
00:03:47,693 --> 00:03:48,942
Yeah, I've hear of that.
90
00:03:49,019 --> 00:03:50,864
- It's a New Jersey thing, right?
- Yep.
91
00:03:50,941 --> 00:03:52,483
Can we try to be
more cosmopolitan?
92
00:03:52,560 --> 00:03:53,940
We're in Frankfurt,
not Trenton.
93
00:03:54,017 --> 00:03:56,361
More weiner, frauleins?
94
00:03:58,661 --> 00:04:00,389
We're gut.
95
00:04:01,590 --> 00:04:04,874
Wow.
Light on leder, heavy on hosen.
96
00:04:04,951 --> 00:04:06,586
What's camel toe for a man?
97
00:04:06,663 --> 00:04:09,928
Oh, eh...
Elchknochel.
98
00:04:10,005 --> 00:04:12,634
- Elchknochel.
- Moose knuckle.
99
00:04:12,711 --> 00:04:15,444
Moose knuckle.
100
00:04:15,749 --> 00:04:18,874
- Elchknochel.
- Elchknochel.
101
00:04:22,316 --> 00:04:25,424
Um, you know wha...
Uh, excuse me.
102
00:04:25,501 --> 00:04:28,874
I'm gonna use the little
fraulein's room.
103
00:04:32,557 --> 00:04:33,863
Schnapps?
104
00:04:34,989 --> 00:04:36,718
Already on my second.
105
00:04:37,557 --> 00:04:39,226
Something wrong?
106
00:04:39,690 --> 00:04:42,476
I wouldn't want anybody in
the company to know about this,
107
00:04:42,553 --> 00:04:45,240
but our trip here,
it's a Hail Mary pass.
108
00:04:45,317 --> 00:04:48,085
Wait, did Quinn Tyler
say no to investing?
109
00:04:48,523 --> 00:04:50,862
Uh... she seems so happy with
the editing we're doing.
110
00:04:50,939 --> 00:04:52,905
- I was hoping that...
- No-no word yet.
111
00:04:54,248 --> 00:04:56,690
But I... I can't put
all my eggs in one basket,
112
00:04:56,767 --> 00:04:59,342
so... I booked
back-to-back meetings
113
00:04:59,419 --> 00:05:03,140
with international investors,
and three just cancelled.
114
00:05:03,524 --> 00:05:06,647
And I have four more tomorrow,
but...
115
00:05:06,730 --> 00:05:08,445
I'm so sorry.
I didn't know.
116
00:05:08,522 --> 00:05:10,335
Been a tough year.
117
00:05:11,834 --> 00:05:13,560
You're the one bright spot.
118
00:05:13,746 --> 00:05:18,094
Except that you're two feet
away from me, and I can't...
119
00:05:18,171 --> 00:05:19,699
I know.
120
00:05:19,933 --> 00:05:22,049
And it's... it's worse over here.
121
00:05:22,126 --> 00:05:25,059
Am I crazy? But I think
that Frankfurt's romantic.
122
00:05:25,594 --> 00:05:27,145
Paris should look out.
123
00:05:27,446 --> 00:05:31,441
I would love
to take you there.
124
00:05:31,930 --> 00:05:33,028
Right now.
125
00:05:33,118 --> 00:05:35,804
Go to the train station,
book a sleeper car,
126
00:05:35,881 --> 00:05:37,723
and wake up
in a different world.
127
00:05:37,863 --> 00:05:39,416
I miss you.
128
00:05:39,764 --> 00:05:41,348
I miss you too.
129
00:05:41,500 --> 00:05:43,621
You're the only person
I wanna talk to.
130
00:05:43,698 --> 00:05:47,364
But the more we talk,
the more I wanna hold you
131
00:05:47,452 --> 00:05:49,655
or kiss you,
and if we do that,
132
00:05:49,732 --> 00:05:53,981
then... you'll be going back
on your decision.
133
00:05:54,461 --> 00:05:55,892
And you'll hate me.
134
00:05:55,969 --> 00:05:58,285
I could never hate you,
Charles.
135
00:05:59,102 --> 00:06:01,168
This is temporary.
136
00:06:01,833 --> 00:06:04,356
You'll get the company
back on its feet.
137
00:06:04,580 --> 00:06:06,051
I know you will.
138
00:06:06,383 --> 00:06:08,129
And I hope so.
139
00:06:08,868 --> 00:06:10,770
Wish me luck tomorrow.
140
00:06:10,954 --> 00:06:12,770
You don't need it.
141
00:06:13,095 --> 00:06:14,797
I do.
142
00:06:15,753 --> 00:06:19,902
We have three months of
operating expenses left.
143
00:06:20,493 --> 00:06:23,074
If we don't get an investor,
144
00:06:24,244 --> 00:06:26,996
Empirical, Millennial,
145
00:06:27,091 --> 00:06:29,429
everything that we have
all worked for
146
00:06:29,506 --> 00:06:30,953
will just...
147
00:06:32,971 --> 00:06:34,571
disappear.
148
00:06:40,634 --> 00:06:44,856
♪ 'Cause you've
got that something ♪
149
00:06:47,370 --> 00:06:50,965
♪ 'Cause you've got
that something ♪
150
00:07:05,742 --> 00:07:08,053
Hello, fraud-lein.
151
00:07:08,298 --> 00:07:10,840
Did you hear the D?
'Cause I put it in there.
152
00:07:13,516 --> 00:07:15,887
"Fraud-lein"?
153
00:07:16,368 --> 00:07:17,563
Great.
154
00:07:17,640 --> 00:07:19,039
I've just heard
from Karl Teuscher.
155
00:07:19,116 --> 00:07:20,272
It's ours, the title.
156
00:07:20,349 --> 00:07:21,637
- What's ours?
- Oh, my God.
157
00:07:21,714 --> 00:07:24,290
Okay, every year a book makes
such a splash in Frankfurt,
158
00:07:24,367 --> 00:07:25,674
that they call it
the Book of the Fair.
159
00:07:25,751 --> 00:07:28,119
This year there are two.
Both of them ours.
160
00:07:28,196 --> 00:07:29,666
"Marriage Vacation,"
and "Capital Letters."
161
00:07:29,743 --> 00:07:33,186
- It has never happened before.
- Oh, my gosh!
162
00:07:33,263 --> 00:07:35,196
Oh, stretching.
That's... that's better.
163
00:07:35,273 --> 00:07:37,054
Yeah, no, I set up
an impromptu press panel.
164
00:07:37,131 --> 00:07:38,463
You know, I thought it'd be
nice to have sort of a...
165
00:07:38,540 --> 00:07:41,255
A sales... oh, my God.
Oh, wow. Word must be out.
166
00:07:41,332 --> 00:07:42,426
Oh, my gosh.
167
00:07:42,503 --> 00:07:44,375
Oh, uh, Diana,
can you get me a pen?
168
00:07:44,452 --> 00:07:46,462
- What?
- I need a pen. Can you just...
169
00:07:47,373 --> 00:07:48,505
Go on.
170
00:07:48,582 --> 00:07:52,369
Um, can you, uh, just
excuse me while I go get myself a pen?
171
00:07:52,615 --> 00:07:54,978
I'll get you a pen, Liza.
172
00:07:55,164 --> 00:07:57,509
Just remember
this moment well.
173
00:07:57,788 --> 00:07:59,272
I certainly will.
174
00:08:00,640 --> 00:08:01,907
Hey, Trout.
175
00:08:01,984 --> 00:08:04,393
So Millennial's
the talk of the Fair.
176
00:08:04,617 --> 00:08:07,349
What do those young girls have
that we old gals don't?
177
00:08:07,426 --> 00:08:09,090
Oh, I don't know.
Of course, I have been
178
00:08:09,158 --> 00:08:11,494
grooming Kelsey for years,
but it wasn't till I loaned her
179
00:08:11,596 --> 00:08:13,719
my assistant that things
really took off.
180
00:08:13,796 --> 00:08:15,004
- Oh.
- You can't work for me
181
00:08:15,081 --> 00:08:16,350
for long
without absorbing
182
00:08:16,427 --> 00:08:17,974
- some wisdom.
- Right.
183
00:08:18,051 --> 00:08:19,984
- That Lisa girl.
- Liza. Yes.
184
00:08:20,074 --> 00:08:22,002
- Mm.
- I mentored her pretty hard.
185
00:08:22,079 --> 00:08:23,645
God love her.
She's so green.
186
00:08:23,722 --> 00:08:26,231
She's basically doing it for
the assistant salary I pay her.
187
00:08:26,308 --> 00:08:28,089
Interesting.
What are those?
188
00:08:28,166 --> 00:08:31,233
- Oh, just the souvenirs.
- Mm-hmm.
189
00:08:31,310 --> 00:08:32,326
Oh, please.
190
00:08:32,403 --> 00:08:35,127
It's not what we remember
of Frankfurt, DiDi.
191
00:08:35,264 --> 00:08:37,323
It's what Frankfurt
remembers of us.
192
00:08:37,400 --> 00:08:39,783
And it remembers 1999.
193
00:08:40,285 --> 00:08:42,700
Standing ovation,
I seem to recall.
194
00:08:42,777 --> 00:08:44,505
I am afraid
those days are over.
195
00:08:44,582 --> 00:08:46,234
I've spoken
to the band leader.
196
00:08:46,311 --> 00:08:48,455
She's game if we are.
197
00:08:48,913 --> 00:08:51,707
- You cannot be serious.
- Oh, I'm dead serious.
198
00:08:51,784 --> 00:08:53,051
I'll see you tonight.
199
00:08:53,128 --> 00:08:55,744
Unless you're,
like your company,
200
00:08:55,885 --> 00:08:57,502
past your prime.
201
00:09:01,428 --> 00:09:04,188
♪ Hey, hey ♪
202
00:09:04,574 --> 00:09:07,552
♪ I like it ♪
203
00:09:07,629 --> 00:09:09,129
- Josh.
- Hey.
204
00:09:09,206 --> 00:09:10,840
Marlowe and Daughters
had crown roast.
205
00:09:10,917 --> 00:09:12,581
So you're coming over,
and bring Lauren.
206
00:09:12,649 --> 00:09:13,849
- All right.
- I wanna make up
207
00:09:13,924 --> 00:09:15,298
for the last one
that I ruined.
208
00:09:15,368 --> 00:09:18,508
So it's just the four of us,
and it'll be fun, I promise.
209
00:09:18,585 --> 00:09:20,782
No drama.
We have meet, wine, and weed.
210
00:09:20,859 --> 00:09:23,318
Okay.
The Maggie Amato Trifecta.
211
00:09:23,395 --> 00:09:25,034
- I am in.
- Yes, all right.
212
00:09:25,111 --> 00:09:26,885
- See you later.
- Bye.
213
00:09:31,488 --> 00:09:32,683
Well, what's next?
214
00:09:32,760 --> 00:09:36,687
Uh, the paperback release of
"Marriage Vacation," of course.
215
00:09:36,780 --> 00:09:39,776
And a new nonfiction book that
we are just editing now,
216
00:09:39,853 --> 00:09:42,927
by world-renowned
finance expert Quinn Tyler.
217
00:09:43,004 --> 00:09:44,677
A provocative examination
218
00:09:44,754 --> 00:09:46,954
of women helping women
in business.
219
00:09:47,043 --> 00:09:48,656
Next question?
220
00:09:49,192 --> 00:09:51,290
Yeah, you keep
mentioning young people,
221
00:09:51,367 --> 00:09:53,755
but tell me,
how old is this tall one?
222
00:09:53,832 --> 00:09:56,462
Um, old enough to know
an appropriate question
223
00:09:56,539 --> 00:09:58,269
when I hear it,
and that wasn't it.
224
00:09:58,346 --> 00:10:00,065
Next.
Uh, follow up.
225
00:10:00,142 --> 00:10:02,405
Maybe it's the light.
If you move a little...
226
00:10:02,482 --> 00:10:04,071
No, it doesn't help.
227
00:10:04,148 --> 00:10:06,175
So does the young one
do the young books
228
00:10:06,252 --> 00:10:07,565
and you do the old ones?
229
00:10:07,642 --> 00:10:09,989
Believe me,
we are both millennials.
230
00:10:10,066 --> 00:10:11,409
- Yeah.
- Next question.
231
00:10:11,486 --> 00:10:14,341
From somebody else.
You look young, though.
232
00:10:14,418 --> 00:10:16,782
So you should tell her
your face cream.
233
00:10:16,859 --> 00:10:20,675
That is women helping women.
And you do what she tells you.
234
00:10:20,752 --> 00:10:22,443
Push up, always up.
235
00:10:22,520 --> 00:10:24,542
Oh, we're out of time.
Thank you very much.
236
00:10:24,619 --> 00:10:26,679
Uh, thank you.
No, we're good.
237
00:10:27,712 --> 00:10:29,849
Gosh, Kelsey, I am so sorry.
I...
238
00:10:29,926 --> 00:10:31,793
I know I look tired.
It's the jetlag and...
239
00:10:31,870 --> 00:10:32,980
It's fine,
don't worry about it.
240
00:10:33,057 --> 00:10:34,005
It's part of the deal.
241
00:10:34,082 --> 00:10:35,847
I just... I hate that you
have to keep covering for me.
242
00:10:35,924 --> 00:10:37,437
I don't wanna
talk about it anymore.
243
00:10:37,514 --> 00:10:39,541
You know what I wanna do?
I wanna go get drunk.
244
00:10:39,618 --> 00:10:41,050
You in?
245
00:10:48,098 --> 00:10:50,851
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
246
00:10:57,043 --> 00:11:00,339
Ooh!
I am gonna get us drinks.
247
00:11:00,416 --> 00:11:03,000
Okay.
Wow.
248
00:11:03,470 --> 00:11:05,341
- Hello, youngster.
- Mm.
249
00:11:05,418 --> 00:11:06,958
Did they card you
at the door?
250
00:11:07,035 --> 00:11:08,734
Cheryl, I'm not
here to get blackmailed.
251
00:11:08,811 --> 00:11:12,296
Look, what I wanna say is,
congratulations.
252
00:11:12,373 --> 00:11:13,497
You're a hit.
253
00:11:13,574 --> 00:11:16,263
Empirical's on the ropes,
but you guys, wow.
254
00:11:16,340 --> 00:11:18,230
Thank you,
but Empirical's gonna be...
255
00:11:18,307 --> 00:11:19,954
So I wanna offer you a job.
256
00:11:20,130 --> 00:11:22,568
I'm pretty sure you're not
making what you deserve,
257
00:11:22,645 --> 00:11:25,437
and I can fix that,
so come to Plaza.
258
00:11:25,514 --> 00:11:27,703
- You're joking.
- No.
259
00:11:28,302 --> 00:11:31,003
You're killing it for a company
that's going underwater,
260
00:11:31,080 --> 00:11:33,437
and I'm throwing you
a life preserver.
261
00:11:33,552 --> 00:11:37,044
And the great part is
I know your age.
262
00:11:37,121 --> 00:11:39,210
So you wouldn't have
to lie anymore.
263
00:11:39,325 --> 00:11:42,351
Or put your employer
or your colleagues at risk.
264
00:11:42,458 --> 00:11:44,430
You can't keep this
a secret much longer.
265
00:11:44,507 --> 00:11:46,258
And if I say no,
you'll expose me?
266
00:11:46,335 --> 00:11:50,466
No. Look, Liza,
you're a mother, I'm a mother.
267
00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:53,101
I swear on my children's lives.
268
00:11:53,348 --> 00:11:56,046
Well, the younger one.
269
00:11:56,229 --> 00:11:59,299
Look, your secret's safe
with me, I promise.
270
00:11:59,379 --> 00:12:00,880
And when it explodes,
271
00:12:00,957 --> 00:12:02,966
your friends will be
under the rubble.
272
00:12:03,043 --> 00:12:06,000
Anyway, there's no pressure,
just, you know, think about it.
273
00:12:13,496 --> 00:12:14,647
Guten Abend.
274
00:12:14,724 --> 00:12:16,583
- You look happy.
- Hmm.
275
00:12:16,660 --> 00:12:18,765
- How'd your meetings go?
- Excellent.
276
00:12:18,902 --> 00:12:24,058
I think that Media-Italia is
interested in investing in us.
277
00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:26,242
Very interested.
How was your day?
278
00:12:26,332 --> 00:12:29,118
Great. Except our press panel
got a little off track.
279
00:12:29,195 --> 00:12:30,910
- What happened?
- Um...
280
00:12:30,987 --> 00:12:32,823
Had to pull this one
away from the bar.
281
00:12:32,900 --> 00:12:35,903
- Whoa! Oh, ho, ho, hoh.
- Easy.
282
00:12:36,280 --> 00:12:39,828
- How about something to eat?
- I am celebrating, okay?
283
00:12:39,905 --> 00:12:42,072
I'm the hit of the Buchmesse.
284
00:12:42,149 --> 00:12:44,242
Yeah, if you don't slow down,
you're gonna be the mess
285
00:12:44,319 --> 00:12:45,292
of the Buchmesse.
286
00:12:45,369 --> 00:12:47,403
Oh,
mess of the Buchmesse.
287
00:12:48,580 --> 00:12:51,643
Und now,
ladies und gentlemen,
288
00:12:51,720 --> 00:12:54,158
back by popular demand,
the Kit Kat Klub
289
00:12:54,235 --> 00:12:56,836
is happy to introduce to you,
fresh from New York,
290
00:12:56,913 --> 00:13:00,164
those singing sensations,
Fraulein ChiChi Sussman,
291
00:13:00,241 --> 00:13:01,947
and Fraulein DiDi Trout.
292
00:13:02,024 --> 00:13:03,125
What?
293
00:13:05,227 --> 00:13:06,393
Oh!
294
00:13:09,579 --> 00:13:11,101
♪ Welcome ♪
295
00:13:11,178 --> 00:13:12,505
Huh.
296
00:13:12,666 --> 00:13:15,290
♪♪
297
00:13:15,367 --> 00:13:17,895
♪ Stranger ♪
298
00:13:18,140 --> 00:13:19,336
- Ooh.
- Yeah!
299
00:13:19,413 --> 00:13:22,587
♪♪
300
00:13:22,738 --> 00:13:23,799
Wow.
301
00:13:23,876 --> 00:13:26,710
♪ Happy to see you ♪
302
00:13:26,787 --> 00:13:27,924
♪♪
303
00:13:28,001 --> 00:13:29,844
- ♪ Stay ♪
- Whoo!
304
00:13:29,921 --> 00:13:32,359
Yes.
305
00:13:32,436 --> 00:13:33,913
♪ Welcome ♪
306
00:13:33,990 --> 00:13:39,175
♪ Im cabaret, au cabaret,
to cabaret ♪
307
00:13:39,252 --> 00:13:43,094
♪♪
308
00:13:43,203 --> 00:13:45,847
Ladies...
and gentlemen.
309
00:13:46,012 --> 00:13:48,726
♪♪
310
00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:50,575
Good evening.
311
00:13:50,652 --> 00:13:53,336
♪♪
312
00:13:53,453 --> 00:13:56,824
- Do you feel good?
- I feel good, Cheryl, I do.
313
00:13:56,987 --> 00:14:00,164
♪♪
314
00:14:00,258 --> 00:14:02,016
- ♪ We are your hosts ♪
- ♪ We are your hosts ♪
315
00:14:02,093 --> 00:14:05,368
♪♪
316
00:14:05,445 --> 00:14:07,483
♪ Welcome ♪
317
00:14:07,560 --> 00:14:13,496
♪ Im cabaret, au cabaret,
to cabaret ♪
318
00:14:13,637 --> 00:14:16,074
Whoo! Whoo.
319
00:14:21,328 --> 00:14:24,920
Whoo!
320
00:14:25,332 --> 00:14:27,539
- Ah...
- Oh...
321
00:14:27,616 --> 00:14:30,160
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
322
00:14:30,849 --> 00:14:33,945
Oh, we still got it, DiDi.
Am I thirsty?
323
00:14:34,022 --> 00:14:36,254
- Liza, shots, please.
- Doubles.
324
00:14:36,331 --> 00:14:37,639
You got it, boss.
325
00:14:37,716 --> 00:14:39,292
Hey, you wanna see
a magic trick?
326
00:14:39,369 --> 00:14:40,809
- What?
- I'm gonna drink this
327
00:14:40,886 --> 00:14:42,567
and turn into
a different person.
328
00:14:42,644 --> 00:14:44,493
Watch this.
329
00:14:45,367 --> 00:14:46,746
♪ ♪
330
00:14:46,823 --> 00:14:48,509
Mmm.
331
00:14:48,919 --> 00:14:50,359
Okay.
Okay, okay.
332
00:14:50,436 --> 00:14:53,418
That is a Frankfurt Freebie.
333
00:14:53,532 --> 00:14:55,765
And there's more
where that came from,
334
00:14:55,842 --> 00:14:57,672
- if you're interested.
- Aha.
335
00:14:57,749 --> 00:15:00,734
'Cause I came
♪♪♪ to furt to frank.
336
00:15:00,811 --> 00:15:02,594
No, that's not right.
337
00:15:02,671 --> 00:15:05,594
I came to Frank ♪♪♪
to furt.
338
00:15:05,671 --> 00:15:07,001
No.
339
00:15:07,229 --> 00:15:10,562
I, uh, think I ought to
get back to the hotel.
340
00:15:10,639 --> 00:15:12,316
- Yep.
- You do that.
341
00:15:12,393 --> 00:15:14,539
- Goodnight, Charles. - Good night.
- Will see you.
342
00:15:14,616 --> 00:15:15,949
I'm so sorry.
343
00:15:16,673 --> 00:15:19,853
Yeah. Now that the boss is
gone we can really drink.
344
00:15:19,930 --> 00:15:21,543
- Oh.
- Wait, wait, wait, hold on.
345
00:15:21,620 --> 00:15:24,785
- That was you holding back?
- All right, ladies.
346
00:15:25,367 --> 00:15:26,828
- Where's Charles?
- He left.
347
00:15:26,905 --> 00:15:28,414
Hey, there,
Scheisse Minnelli,
348
00:15:28,491 --> 00:15:31,676
- you wanna go on a pub crawl?
- Ha! Hell, yeah.
349
00:15:40,972 --> 00:15:43,188
I think I found a way out
for you and me.
350
00:15:43,833 --> 00:15:46,162
For all of us.
Can I come in?
351
00:15:46,239 --> 00:15:49,403
I can't promise
I won't try to kiss you.
352
00:15:50,060 --> 00:15:52,388
Me first.
353
00:16:01,673 --> 00:16:04,791
Okay, so I wanted
to get an erotic cake
354
00:16:04,868 --> 00:16:07,330
from the kosher bakery on
Driggs with four breasts,
355
00:16:07,407 --> 00:16:08,734
you know, in honor
of your new love,
356
00:16:08,811 --> 00:16:11,072
- but it's a Build-A-Bear now.
- I know.
357
00:16:11,149 --> 00:16:13,297
I can top that.
Okay, this hipster family
358
00:16:13,374 --> 00:16:16,833
comes into the shop last night,
and they wanna tattoo,
359
00:16:17,406 --> 00:16:18,653
get ready,
their seven-year-old son.
360
00:16:18,730 --> 00:16:20,344
- Stop.
- No. - I swear.
361
00:16:20,421 --> 00:16:21,479
Oh, my God.
362
00:16:21,556 --> 00:16:22,598
- Unbelievable.
- You know,
363
00:16:22,675 --> 00:16:24,266
I haven't lived here
for 20 years
364
00:16:24,343 --> 00:16:26,867
to start dodging stroller
traffic on the sidewalk.
365
00:16:26,944 --> 00:16:29,916
I mean, junkies, yes.
But strollers, no.
366
00:16:29,993 --> 00:16:31,795
And you know, it's not just
the straight hipsters.
367
00:16:31,872 --> 00:16:33,822
I mean, now,
it's lesbian couples now
368
00:16:33,899 --> 00:16:35,313
- that wanna have kids.
- Oh, I know.
369
00:16:35,390 --> 00:16:37,369
I'm so misguided.
I mean, so many of those kids
370
00:16:37,446 --> 00:16:38,584
are gonna turn out straight.
371
00:16:38,661 --> 00:16:40,705
It's like mice
having a litter of kittens.
372
00:16:40,782 --> 00:16:42,033
You know, sure, they're gonna
be cute
373
00:16:42,110 --> 00:16:43,649
for the first couple
of years, but then, you know,
374
00:16:43,726 --> 00:16:45,571
they're gonna turn.
They are gonna turn.
375
00:16:45,704 --> 00:16:48,533
But I... but you must know,
you must know,
376
00:16:48,610 --> 00:16:50,253
straight people
are not the enemy.
377
00:16:50,330 --> 00:16:52,711
- Thank you. Right back at ya.
- Right? Right?
378
00:16:52,788 --> 00:16:56,357
And second of all, I was hoping
to be one of those clichés.
379
00:16:56,434 --> 00:17:01,072
I tried really hard for a year,
but, ugh, it's expensive.
380
00:17:01,149 --> 00:17:02,779
So I had to just give it up.
381
00:17:02,856 --> 00:17:05,801
- Wait, you wanna have a baby?
- Yeah.
382
00:17:05,884 --> 00:17:08,268
You don't think
I'd be a good mom?
383
00:17:08,345 --> 00:17:10,666
- No, you'd be amazing.
- Thank you.
384
00:17:10,743 --> 00:17:12,229
Come on, just have
a C-section.
385
00:17:12,306 --> 00:17:13,945
You know, you don't wanna
stretch out your good sweater.
386
00:17:14,022 --> 00:17:15,489
Oh, my God.
387
00:17:15,704 --> 00:17:17,721
You know what?
Seriously, Maggie,
388
00:17:17,798 --> 00:17:19,674
you can relax, because, I mean,
389
00:17:19,751 --> 00:17:21,081
forget the fertility
treatments,
390
00:17:21,158 --> 00:17:23,364
I can't even afford
a sperm donor.
391
00:17:23,441 --> 00:17:26,667
- Unless Josh wants to pitch in.
- Oh. Hey, now.
392
00:17:26,744 --> 00:17:28,539
Friends and family discount.
Really?
393
00:17:28,616 --> 00:17:30,056
- Mm-hmm.
- Yes.
394
00:17:30,133 --> 00:17:32,289
He would be amazing.
Those shoulders.
395
00:17:32,366 --> 00:17:34,119
Oy, that face.
Yes, come on.
396
00:17:34,196 --> 00:17:35,429
It'll look good
on a boy or a girl.
397
00:17:35,506 --> 00:17:38,054
You guys, we should do it
lesbian old school.
398
00:17:38,131 --> 00:17:41,140
I'm talking sporty mullets,
turkey basters,
399
00:17:41,217 --> 00:17:42,640
Dinah Shore Weekend.
400
00:17:42,774 --> 00:17:45,861
Wait, wait, wait.
What is your family history?
401
00:17:45,938 --> 00:17:46,955
- Mm?
- And also,
402
00:17:47,032 --> 00:17:49,256
have you had work done?
Because I really worry
403
00:17:49,484 --> 00:17:51,910
about noses, and this one,
it's been touched.
404
00:17:52,453 --> 00:17:55,403
- No, it's mine. It's mine.
- Are you sure? You promise?
405
00:17:55,480 --> 00:17:57,197
Ho... ho... hold on, hold on.
406
00:17:57,274 --> 00:17:59,244
First you spring in
the baby thing on me,
407
00:17:59,321 --> 00:18:00,906
and now you're asking
my friend for sperm?
408
00:18:00,983 --> 00:18:03,008
Well, do you know
how much sperm costs?
409
00:18:03,085 --> 00:18:04,275
It's a lot.
410
00:18:04,352 --> 00:18:06,552
So I have to follow up
on any option.
411
00:18:06,629 --> 00:18:09,846
So, wait a second,
even if you could afford
412
00:18:09,923 --> 00:18:11,312
to do it,
you still want a baby?
413
00:18:11,389 --> 00:18:12,354
Yeah.
414
00:18:12,431 --> 00:18:14,653
When were you planning
on telling me this?
415
00:18:14,790 --> 00:18:17,765
I don't know, when we were
on solid ground again.
416
00:18:17,842 --> 00:18:19,226
I thought we were.
417
00:18:19,337 --> 00:18:21,078
I guess I was just really
worried
418
00:18:21,155 --> 00:18:23,191
about how you
were gonna react.
419
00:18:23,446 --> 00:18:27,488
Oh.
I'm blindsided.
420
00:18:28,187 --> 00:18:30,192
Well, I'm disappointed.
421
00:18:32,359 --> 00:18:35,851
♪ Doo do do do do
Doo do do, yeah ♪
422
00:18:35,928 --> 00:18:37,556
You at Plaza?
423
00:18:37,633 --> 00:18:39,939
That's a lot
to wrap my head around.
424
00:18:40,016 --> 00:18:42,101
It's not just
about you and me, Charles.
425
00:18:42,178 --> 00:18:44,950
It's what my lie
is doing to Kelsey.
426
00:18:45,118 --> 00:18:47,324
If I'm gone,
she can breathe easy.
427
00:18:47,638 --> 00:18:51,106
But Millennial
is our biggest asset.
428
00:18:51,868 --> 00:18:53,685
Is it gonna be
as strong without you?
429
00:18:53,762 --> 00:18:56,564
Kelsey's the star.
You saw something in her
430
00:18:56,641 --> 00:18:58,903
a year before I got here,
and she delivered.
431
00:18:59,267 --> 00:19:01,192
It's her imprint.
432
00:19:01,555 --> 00:19:02,658
I'm not so sure.
433
00:19:02,735 --> 00:19:05,867
Plus, not being together
during working hours
434
00:19:05,944 --> 00:19:08,653
allows us to be together
after hours.
435
00:19:09,306 --> 00:19:11,817
And we're pretty good
after hours.
436
00:19:12,532 --> 00:19:14,801
Only one problem.
437
00:19:15,588 --> 00:19:17,227
You have a contract with us.
438
00:19:17,383 --> 00:19:20,035
What can I do
to get you release me?
439
00:19:22,500 --> 00:19:24,524
Um...
440
00:19:29,222 --> 00:19:30,526
Spend the night?
441
00:19:30,603 --> 00:19:32,156
If I do,
442
00:19:32,285 --> 00:19:36,007
we both agree
I'm working for Plaza.
443
00:19:37,098 --> 00:19:39,531
Consider yourself fired.
444
00:19:46,731 --> 00:19:50,009
Two vodka sodas, please.
Thanks so much.
445
00:19:50,121 --> 00:19:52,382
- It's on me.
- Oh, thank you.
446
00:19:52,553 --> 00:19:55,423
Say, you look very nice.
447
00:19:55,629 --> 00:19:57,122
Oh.
448
00:19:57,505 --> 00:19:59,477
- Ah.
- Um...
449
00:20:01,239 --> 00:20:02,895
Hey, keep your hands off her.
450
00:20:02,972 --> 00:20:07,071
- It's okay, it's okay.
- See? Leave us alone, man.
451
00:20:09,777 --> 00:20:11,630
Ah!
452
00:20:11,707 --> 00:20:13,841
What's happening?
453
00:20:13,918 --> 00:20:15,713
All right,
let's get out of here.
454
00:20:17,398 --> 00:20:20,252
Whoa-ho.
This floor wobbles.
455
00:20:20,329 --> 00:20:22,653
- Uh-huh.
- They should fix that.
456
00:20:22,758 --> 00:20:25,166
Hey.
Well, here we are.
457
00:20:25,243 --> 00:20:27,504
- Where's your key?
- Uh, it's in my coat.
458
00:20:27,930 --> 00:20:29,512
Where's my coat?
459
00:20:32,673 --> 00:20:34,582
♪ Are they for real? ♪
460
00:20:43,200 --> 00:20:45,304
Ooh, Liza.
461
00:20:46,887 --> 00:20:50,184
Liza, I need an answer about
that job offer right away,
462
00:20:50,261 --> 00:20:52,467
as soon as possible.
463
00:20:52,567 --> 00:20:53,949
Is now soon enough?
464
00:20:54,026 --> 00:20:55,423
Mm-hmm.
465
00:20:55,500 --> 00:20:57,445
Because the answer is yes.
466
00:20:58,246 --> 00:20:59,778
Hey.
467
00:21:00,551 --> 00:21:02,312
Sleep well.
468
00:21:04,395 --> 00:21:06,570
Phew.
Smart girl.
469
00:21:14,785 --> 00:21:17,398
Did you forget your...?
470
00:21:17,660 --> 00:21:20,841
Sorry.
Wrong room.
471
00:21:20,918 --> 00:21:23,320
Ah, goodnight.
472
00:21:30,781 --> 00:21:32,243
Mm.
473
00:21:35,406 --> 00:21:37,188
No, no, no, no.
474
00:21:37,265 --> 00:21:38,639
Why am I in your room?
475
00:21:38,716 --> 00:21:43,153
You lost your coat and your
key, so I brought you here.
476
00:21:43,572 --> 00:21:46,462
Oh, my God.
Okay, and what did we do?
477
00:21:46,539 --> 00:21:49,483
We did nothing.
You passed out.
478
00:21:49,560 --> 00:21:51,567
And I... how do I put this?
479
00:21:51,754 --> 00:21:53,763
Had to light a lot of matches.
480
00:21:54,243 --> 00:21:56,958
Oh, my God.
Okay, but...
481
00:21:57,038 --> 00:21:58,879
You... you just tucked me in,
right?
482
00:21:58,956 --> 00:22:01,531
Mm-hmm, yep.
"Ucked" with a T, not an F.
483
00:22:01,608 --> 00:22:04,520
I slept on the couch.
Well, what a gentleman.
484
00:22:04,597 --> 00:22:06,045
Who would've thought?
485
00:22:06,122 --> 00:22:08,906
I feel like I should buy you
breakfast or something.
486
00:22:08,983 --> 00:22:11,289
Not this morning.
While you and Liza were busy
487
00:22:11,366 --> 00:22:13,190
patting yourselves
on the back yesterday,
488
00:22:13,267 --> 00:22:15,672
Gerhardt Schmidt
finally answered my email.
489
00:22:15,749 --> 00:22:18,719
Yep, new agent
with an unsigned author
490
00:22:18,796 --> 00:22:20,248
who's just written book one of
a series
491
00:22:20,325 --> 00:22:23,738
about the Sicilian Mafia.
Could be the next "Godfather."
492
00:22:23,825 --> 00:22:26,094
Wow. Well, you are due
for a comeback.
493
00:22:26,171 --> 00:22:28,729
Uh-huh.
And once I sign him,
494
00:22:28,806 --> 00:22:31,076
I'll have my pick
of breakfast offers.
495
00:22:31,153 --> 00:22:32,718
Pick of everything.
496
00:22:32,795 --> 00:22:35,270
Mm, like you could
do better than me.
497
00:22:35,712 --> 00:22:37,383
Well, for one thing,
498
00:22:37,460 --> 00:22:39,848
whoever she is,
she won't snore.
499
00:22:42,440 --> 00:22:45,371
Aw.
500
00:22:48,470 --> 00:22:50,368
Gerhardt?
Zane Anders.
501
00:22:50,653 --> 00:22:52,950
So glad to finally...
502
00:22:53,526 --> 00:22:55,322
meet you.
503
00:22:56,892 --> 00:22:59,583
Yeah.
Sorry about that.
504
00:23:04,098 --> 00:23:06,170
I love Frankfurt.
You realize we sold books
505
00:23:06,247 --> 00:23:08,401
in every single territory.
506
00:23:08,478 --> 00:23:10,403
It's gonna be
such a good year for us.
507
00:23:10,480 --> 00:23:11,517
Yeah.
508
00:23:11,603 --> 00:23:13,598
You know what?
I gotta tell you,
509
00:23:13,820 --> 00:23:17,682
I think Zane,
I might've misjudged him.
510
00:23:17,759 --> 00:23:20,052
You weren't there last night,
but after you left,
511
00:23:20,129 --> 00:23:21,809
there was this guy...
512
00:23:22,098 --> 00:23:24,145
Hey, what is going on with you?
513
00:23:25,118 --> 00:23:26,693
Do you sometimes
hate me a little?
514
00:23:26,770 --> 00:23:30,356
What? Why?
Wh... what are you talking about?
515
00:23:31,613 --> 00:23:35,489
I've seen you this weekend,
lying to cover up my lie.
516
00:23:35,566 --> 00:23:37,631
And you smile
and don't complain,
517
00:23:37,708 --> 00:23:40,411
but, , you
gotta hate me a little for it.
518
00:23:40,532 --> 00:23:41,918
It's okay, I...
519
00:23:41,995 --> 00:23:43,438
It's only okay
because we've managed
520
00:23:43,515 --> 00:23:45,104
to dodge the bullet so far.
521
00:23:45,181 --> 00:23:46,662
But one day we're not
gonna be able to,
522
00:23:46,739 --> 00:23:49,966
and it's all gonna blow up, and
Millennial will never recover.
523
00:23:50,861 --> 00:23:52,755
And you'll hate me then.
524
00:23:53,194 --> 00:23:54,594
- No.
- Kelsey.
525
00:23:54,671 --> 00:23:56,139
No, it's not...
It's not gonna happen.
526
00:23:56,216 --> 00:23:57,619
I got a job offer.
527
00:23:57,696 --> 00:23:59,679
Cheryl Sussman
at Plaza Publishing,
528
00:23:59,756 --> 00:24:01,012
and I'm gonna take it.
529
00:24:01,689 --> 00:24:02,843
- No.
- Kelsey.
530
00:24:02,920 --> 00:24:04,119
I can never repay you
531
00:24:04,196 --> 00:24:05,329
for what you have done for me,
532
00:24:05,406 --> 00:24:06,678
but that day
when you hate me,
533
00:24:06,755 --> 00:24:09,692
I have gotta get out of here
before that happens.
534
00:24:09,776 --> 00:24:11,149
While the party's
still happening,
535
00:24:11,226 --> 00:24:14,121
and... and we're on a high,
and...
536
00:24:14,305 --> 00:24:16,223
It had to happen, Kels.
537
00:24:16,374 --> 00:24:18,919
We've come to
the end of this road.
538
00:24:19,098 --> 00:24:22,168
It was a beautiful,
beautiful road.
539
00:24:22,258 --> 00:24:25,659
And I had so much fun, and
I loved every minute of it.
540
00:24:27,534 --> 00:24:30,573
No. There has to be
another way, okay?
541
00:24:30,650 --> 00:24:33,375
We need to just stop and
take a second and breathe,
542
00:24:33,452 --> 00:24:35,966
- and think, and...
- It's okay. Kelsey, it's okay.
543
00:24:36,254 --> 00:24:38,124
We both know it.
544
00:24:38,685 --> 00:24:40,960
It's time for me to go.
545
00:24:44,113 --> 00:24:46,425
♪ I love you ♪
546
00:24:46,616 --> 00:24:51,218
♪ Hey, sister, I'm gonna be
standing with you ♪
547
00:24:51,300 --> 00:24:53,569
♪ Yeah, with you ♪
548
00:24:53,878 --> 00:24:56,741
♪ Yeah,
With you ♪
39724
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