Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:13,657 --> 00:00:18,657
Subtitles by explosiveskull
2
00:01:06,874 --> 00:01:08,673
OK, what were we supposed to do?
3
00:01:08,675 --> 00:01:09,541
Kill her?
4
00:01:15,582 --> 00:01:17,352
Oh man.
5
00:01:18,386 --> 00:01:20,551
I can't believe I'm
here with you right now.
6
00:01:20,553 --> 00:01:22,290
Going to school
before school starts.
7
00:01:22,856 --> 00:01:24,122
You're such a dweeb, dude.
8
00:01:24,124 --> 00:01:27,162
And worse than that, I think
it's rubbing off on me.
9
00:01:27,594 --> 00:01:28,660
Dude, chill out.
10
00:01:28,662 --> 00:01:30,762
This is going to take
like two seconds.
11
00:01:30,764 --> 00:01:32,764
I'm not even part of your
gay little club, dude.
12
00:01:32,766 --> 00:01:34,833
I really wish you
would have told me
13
00:01:34,835 --> 00:01:36,704
that you were doing this
today before inviting me over.
14
00:01:37,371 --> 00:01:38,437
I didn't invite you.
15
00:01:38,439 --> 00:01:39,204
You just showed up.
16
00:01:39,206 --> 00:01:40,339
Still, false advertising.
17
00:01:46,446 --> 00:01:48,749
Hey, Sammy.
18
00:01:49,416 --> 00:01:50,315
Where is everyone?
19
00:01:51,186 --> 00:01:52,717
Look, this isn't a team meeting.
20
00:01:52,719 --> 00:01:53,719
So let's get right to it.
21
00:01:53,721 --> 00:01:56,190
Have you seen this?
22
00:01:56,790 --> 00:01:58,425
Everyone has seen this video.
23
00:01:59,359 --> 00:02:00,592
This is like Chernobyl bad.
24
00:02:00,594 --> 00:02:01,993
Who the hell is Chernobyl?
25
00:02:01,995 --> 00:02:04,898
I like to think I created a
certain standard for this group
26
00:02:05,799 --> 00:02:07,633
that you just no
longer live up to.
27
00:02:07,635 --> 00:02:09,468
And so Simon,
you're out of FMSDA.
28
00:02:09,470 --> 00:02:10,702
I'm going to need
your jump drive
29
00:02:10,704 --> 00:02:12,472
and your computer
lab key card back.
30
00:02:15,709 --> 00:02:17,778
I'm prepared to hear you
defend yourself and make
31
00:02:18,879 --> 00:02:21,349
me understand why you
deserve to stay in FMSDA.
32
00:02:26,519 --> 00:02:28,356
Rip a whole new asshole dude.
33
00:02:31,758 --> 00:02:32,859
Whatever.
34
00:02:33,393 --> 00:02:35,329
I'm sorry.
35
00:02:35,696 --> 00:02:36,730
Compelling.
36
00:02:37,998 --> 00:02:41,236
One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight.
37
00:02:41,768 --> 00:02:43,569
One, two, three, four...
38
00:02:43,571 --> 00:02:45,240
This ain't your avenue, man.
39
00:02:45,905 --> 00:02:47,304
Would you just shut your mouth?
40
00:02:47,306 --> 00:02:49,974
Every time you open your mouth,
you just make things worse.
41
00:02:49,976 --> 00:02:52,779
Dude, we are going to kick this
school's ass this year, man.
42
00:02:53,079 --> 00:02:53,812
Oh man.
43
00:02:53,814 --> 00:02:55,316
Oh shit, lacrosse team.
44
00:02:55,916 --> 00:02:57,918
Hide, hide, hide, hide, hide.
45
00:03:03,823 --> 00:03:05,493
There's that son of a bitch.
46
00:03:06,060 --> 00:03:07,395
Bbashrethedorf.
47
00:03:07,862 --> 00:03:08,996
Oh, that's Desiree.
48
00:03:12,066 --> 00:03:15,436
I cannot not understand what
she sees in that douche bag.
49
00:03:21,475 --> 00:03:22,440
What was that?
50
00:03:22,442 --> 00:03:23,474
No one.
51
00:03:23,476 --> 00:03:24,276
You were looking at
her, weren't you.
52
00:03:24,278 --> 00:03:30,917
Bashrethedorf.
53
00:03:31,719 --> 00:03:32,850
Honey, I know what I'm doing.
54
00:03:32,852 --> 00:03:34,685
You obviously don't.
55
00:03:34,687 --> 00:03:37,655
Anyone who comes to the door
can see inside the house now.
56
00:03:37,657 --> 00:03:39,491
The TV part supposed
to go on the inside.
57
00:03:39,493 --> 00:03:41,125
The TV part, would you
listen to yourself?
58
00:03:41,127 --> 00:03:43,494
The monitor is on the
inside of the house,
59
00:03:43,496 --> 00:03:45,963
then how is any going to know
that we have a video intercom.
60
00:03:45,965 --> 00:03:48,302
Why does anyone have to know
that we have a video intercom?
61
00:03:49,436 --> 00:03:54,341
Because if I'm going to
spend $537.51 on something,
62
00:03:55,442 --> 00:03:57,377
I don't want to have to
hide it from my neighbors.
63
00:03:57,710 --> 00:04:00,013
I can't.
64
00:04:06,821 --> 00:04:07,855
How's it going, Dad?
65
00:04:08,456 --> 00:04:09,455
Oh, you know.
66
00:04:09,457 --> 00:04:10,722
I can't complain.
67
00:04:10,724 --> 00:04:12,893
So how's school going?
68
00:04:13,726 --> 00:04:15,962
School hasn't started yet, Dad.
69
00:04:16,764 --> 00:04:18,099
But it was a pretty rough day.
70
00:04:18,666 --> 00:04:19,498
Good, good.
71
00:04:19,500 --> 00:04:20,698
Just keep it up.
72
00:04:32,579 --> 00:04:35,015
You know, I heard Ahmad even
got a girl from this summer.
73
00:04:39,486 --> 00:04:41,022
I'm sick of this shit.
74
00:04:41,688 --> 00:04:42,787
That was my iPad.
75
00:04:42,789 --> 00:04:44,358
I'm sick of being a loser, man.
76
00:04:44,757 --> 00:04:46,056
I've had it.
77
00:04:46,058 --> 00:04:47,892
Guys like Bashly get all the
girls, and what do we get?
78
00:04:47,894 --> 00:04:49,029
Pantsed on YouTube.
79
00:04:49,630 --> 00:04:51,365
Yeah, I know.
80
00:04:51,731 --> 00:04:53,130
Wait, Ahmad?
81
00:04:53,132 --> 00:04:55,902
The spoiled little Indian kid
from your iPhone club thingy.
82
00:04:56,769 --> 00:04:57,935
OK, first of all, that's racist.
83
00:04:57,937 --> 00:04:59,171
I don't see how that's racist.
84
00:04:59,173 --> 00:05:01,539
He's from India and he's
a squirrly looking fella.
85
00:05:01,541 --> 00:05:02,376
Well, yeah.
86
00:05:02,642 --> 00:05:03,842
Him.
87
00:05:03,844 --> 00:05:06,514
How did that little dude
get a girl to date him?
88
00:05:07,046 --> 00:05:08,380
Dude probably made it up.
89
00:05:08,382 --> 00:05:10,649
No, I've seen pictures of
them together and everything.
90
00:05:10,651 --> 00:05:11,782
So, it's easy to fake that.
91
00:05:16,524 --> 00:05:19,060
You know, it actually
is really easy to fake.
92
00:05:20,060 --> 00:05:21,629
We're going to make
ourselves girlfriends.
93
00:05:22,096 --> 00:05:22,661
No, no.
94
00:05:22,663 --> 00:05:23,794
That's creepy.
95
00:05:23,796 --> 00:05:25,531
That's beyond creepy.
96
00:05:25,533 --> 00:05:26,964
Well dude, I hate
to break it to you,
97
00:05:26,966 --> 00:05:27,798
but we're kind of pathetic
and creepy already.
98
00:05:27,800 --> 00:05:28,799
Deal with it.
99
00:05:28,801 --> 00:05:29,433
People would see
right through that.
100
00:05:29,435 --> 00:05:30,501
No they wouldn't.
101
00:05:30,503 --> 00:05:31,236
You're like an idiot
savant computer guy.
102
00:05:31,238 --> 00:05:34,041
Just make it do things.
103
00:05:34,642 --> 00:05:35,875
Make it work.
104
00:05:35,877 --> 00:05:37,943
There is no way that I'm
going to sit here and make
105
00:05:37,945 --> 00:05:39,447
a girlfriend on my computer.
106
00:05:40,014 --> 00:05:41,212
It doesn't work that way.
107
00:05:41,214 --> 00:05:44,084
You know, just think about
all the opportunities
108
00:05:45,084 --> 00:05:46,383
that this little
computer could give us.
109
00:05:46,385 --> 00:05:49,020
Just think about all the
stupid app shit that you make.
110
00:05:49,022 --> 00:05:50,055
Don't call it stupid.
111
00:05:50,057 --> 00:05:51,089
All that really
interesting app stuff
112
00:05:51,091 --> 00:05:53,058
you make, why don't
you just make it,
113
00:05:53,060 --> 00:05:55,930
you know, interestinger,
like with boobies.
114
00:05:56,764 --> 00:05:58,633
Think about the boobies, Simon.
115
00:05:59,166 --> 00:06:00,332
Think about the boobies.
116
00:06:10,844 --> 00:06:12,109
It's not going to work.
117
00:06:12,111 --> 00:06:14,246
We just post a
bunch pictures of us
118
00:06:14,248 --> 00:06:16,517
Photoshopped in with some girls,
claiming to be our girlfriends.
119
00:06:17,351 --> 00:06:19,217
People are going to
see right through that.
120
00:06:19,219 --> 00:06:20,685
Haven't you seen "Catfish?"
121
00:06:20,687 --> 00:06:21,820
Here me out.
122
00:06:21,822 --> 00:06:23,688
We take different pieces
from different girls
123
00:06:23,690 --> 00:06:25,089
on the Internet.
124
00:06:25,091 --> 00:06:26,858
We put them together to make
an amalgam of a girl, you know?
125
00:06:26,860 --> 00:06:28,092
It's one that can't be searched.
126
00:06:28,094 --> 00:06:30,128
Different hair from this
girl, eyes from this girl,
127
00:06:30,130 --> 00:06:32,033
lips from this girl,
tits from that girl,
128
00:06:32,765 --> 00:06:34,099
real Frankenstein shit.
129
00:06:40,640 --> 00:06:42,542
Like, they go to be hot,
but they can't be too hot,
130
00:06:42,875 --> 00:06:44,008
you know?
131
00:06:44,010 --> 00:06:46,714
Like, in your case maybe
a little bit jerkey.
132
00:06:48,014 --> 00:06:53,553
We hack into Facebook, we
go back in time literally
133
00:06:54,288 --> 00:06:55,957
by changing the
days on the photos,
134
00:06:56,990 --> 00:06:59,159
and put it in like
they've been on for years.
135
00:06:59,692 --> 00:07:00,692
You know?
136
00:07:00,694 --> 00:07:02,196
Like sweet sixteens,
family reunions,
137
00:07:03,029 --> 00:07:05,265
quinceaneras and all that shit.
138
00:07:06,300 --> 00:07:08,769
Like, they need to be
interactive, you know?
139
00:07:10,003 --> 00:07:12,003
Write an iPhone ad that
will text and call us.
140
00:07:40,200 --> 00:07:43,637
What are you going
to name yours?
141
00:07:43,937 --> 00:07:45,273
Lilly.
142
00:07:45,938 --> 00:07:48,008
Her name is Lilly.
143
00:08:21,974 --> 00:08:22,741
College girls?
144
00:08:22,743 --> 00:08:23,743
No way.
145
00:08:35,055 --> 00:08:36,487
We now have girlfriends.
146
00:09:09,156 --> 00:09:12,627
Greetings lame dicks.
147
00:09:12,959 --> 00:09:13,491
Stanley.
148
00:09:13,493 --> 00:09:14,293
Whats up?
149
00:09:14,295 --> 00:09:16,130
So, I heard about your GFs.
150
00:09:16,763 --> 00:09:17,295
Oh, did you now?
151
00:09:17,297 --> 00:09:18,130
Yeah, I did.
152
00:09:18,132 --> 00:09:18,831
We haven't even told anybody.
153
00:09:18,833 --> 00:09:20,332
I saw it on Facebook.
154
00:09:20,334 --> 00:09:22,303
Everybody saw it on Facebook.
155
00:09:22,902 --> 00:09:23,869
Well, our girls.
156
00:09:23,871 --> 00:09:24,602
They just had to
go tell everybody.
157
00:09:24,604 --> 00:09:26,037
You know how girls are?
158
00:09:26,039 --> 00:09:27,005
Yeah.
159
00:09:27,007 --> 00:09:27,805
They're really into us.
160
00:09:27,807 --> 00:09:28,807
Yeah.
161
00:09:28,809 --> 00:09:29,441
Really into us.
162
00:09:29,443 --> 00:09:30,311
So where are they?
163
00:09:30,978 --> 00:09:31,809
Oh, that's right.
164
00:09:31,811 --> 00:09:32,910
They're college girls, right?
165
00:09:32,912 --> 00:09:33,444
Hm-hm.
166
00:09:33,446 --> 00:09:34,545
Totally.
167
00:09:34,547 --> 00:09:35,713
So why didn't you
mention them yesterday?
168
00:09:35,715 --> 00:09:36,515
Well, because you were
being a dick yesterday.
169
00:09:36,517 --> 00:09:36,948
What college do they go to?
170
00:09:36,950 --> 00:09:38,850
State.
171
00:09:38,852 --> 00:09:39,417
Where'd you meet them?
172
00:09:39,419 --> 00:09:40,519
Outward bound.
173
00:09:40,521 --> 00:09:41,352
Why is this the first
time we heard of it.
174
00:09:41,354 --> 00:09:42,587
Extreme wilderness adventure.
175
00:09:42,589 --> 00:09:44,155
We're only allowed to use
technology once per week
176
00:09:44,157 --> 00:09:44,823
and call it...
177
00:09:44,825 --> 00:09:45,289
Where are they from?
178
00:09:45,291 --> 00:09:45,856
Stacey?
179
00:09:45,858 --> 00:09:46,290
Willowsbrooke.
180
00:09:46,292 --> 00:09:46,824
Lilly?
181
00:09:46,826 --> 00:09:47,692
Northbrooke.
182
00:09:47,694 --> 00:09:48,159
Have they met your parents yet?
183
00:09:48,161 --> 00:09:49,895
Not yet.
184
00:09:49,897 --> 00:09:50,828
We're keeping it casual.
185
00:09:50,830 --> 00:09:51,563
How far have you
gotten with her?
186
00:09:51,565 --> 00:09:52,063
A gentleman never tells.
187
00:09:52,065 --> 00:09:52,463
Bullshit.
188
00:09:52,465 --> 00:09:55,066
Peg?
189
00:09:55,068 --> 00:09:55,500
Oh, we're boning like rabbits,
but like really horny rabbits.
190
00:09:55,502 --> 00:09:55,933
Dude.
191
00:09:55,935 --> 00:09:56,367
What?
192
00:09:56,369 --> 00:09:56,967
Gross.
193
00:09:58,504 --> 00:09:59,706
Oh, lookey here.
194
00:10:00,873 --> 00:10:02,409
Calling me right now,
the old ball and chain.
195
00:10:02,910 --> 00:10:03,475
Nice.
196
00:10:03,477 --> 00:10:04,241
Yeah.
197
00:10:04,243 --> 00:10:06,680
Well, see you later, dude.
198
00:10:08,849 --> 00:10:11,218
Mr. Nathaniel Hawthorne
working on the emotion
199
00:10:12,352 --> 00:10:15,823
of his protagonist in this
work, remembering class
200
00:10:16,824 --> 00:10:21,395
that the protagonist
is the main character.
201
00:10:22,461 --> 00:10:26,766
The protagonist faces
almost a force of agony
202
00:10:27,267 --> 00:10:28,703
that has befallen him.
203
00:10:29,502 --> 00:10:31,502
I'm sorry about what
happened yesterday.
204
00:10:31,504 --> 00:10:34,874
I wanted you to stay
on and be on Rusty.
205
00:10:35,209 --> 00:10:36,174
It's OK.
206
00:10:36,176 --> 00:10:37,241
It's really not
that big of deal.
207
00:10:37,243 --> 00:10:38,375
It is to me.
208
00:10:38,377 --> 00:10:39,678
I actually wanted to
win something this year.
209
00:10:39,680 --> 00:10:42,248
But with you gone, that's
pretty much out the window.
210
00:10:43,382 --> 00:10:49,256
Something that you just
don't like about yourself.
211
00:10:49,857 --> 00:10:50,690
Well, I have.
212
00:10:51,592 --> 00:10:54,728
Can any of you
guess what mine is?
213
00:10:57,864 --> 00:10:59,834
It's my pinky toe.
214
00:11:00,267 --> 00:11:01,401
I can't move it.
215
00:12:35,195 --> 00:12:40,099
Now class, let's quiet down
because this is the best part.
216
00:12:56,182 --> 00:12:57,884
Peg.
217
00:12:58,151 --> 00:12:58,618
Hey.
218
00:12:59,151 --> 00:13:01,021
What's up?
219
00:13:01,521 --> 00:13:03,891
Who are you texting?
220
00:13:04,291 --> 00:13:06,392
My girlfriend.
221
00:13:06,660 --> 00:13:07,259
Oh.
222
00:13:07,261 --> 00:13:09,463
What, what, why?
223
00:13:10,030 --> 00:13:10,761
Oh, nothing.
224
00:13:10,763 --> 00:13:12,498
I was just thinking...
225
00:13:12,999 --> 00:13:13,868
nothing.
226
00:13:14,267 --> 00:13:15,102
Thinking what?
227
00:13:18,137 --> 00:13:21,441
Let's talk after class.
228
00:13:22,008 --> 00:13:23,409
Oh, yeah.
229
00:13:24,044 --> 00:13:26,013
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
230
00:13:36,455 --> 00:13:39,026
A lot of butts.
231
00:13:41,427 --> 00:13:42,897
Sorry, guys.
232
00:13:43,430 --> 00:13:45,565
It's my girlfriend, Lilly.
233
00:13:50,436 --> 00:13:52,038
She' really into me.
234
00:13:52,472 --> 00:13:53,941
Well, that's it.
235
00:13:54,775 --> 00:13:57,207
Now, from now on when
you enter this class,
236
00:13:57,209 --> 00:13:59,979
you will leave your phones
right here in this basket.
237
00:14:01,047 --> 00:14:04,450
And when you leave, you
can take them with you.
238
00:14:15,328 --> 00:14:17,164
I thought you were
different, Simon.
239
00:14:28,108 --> 00:14:30,074
Dude, I accidentally
mixed up the messages.
240
00:14:30,076 --> 00:14:31,644
Stacy go the ones I wrote
and Lilly got the ones
241
00:14:32,278 --> 00:14:33,077
that you wrote.
242
00:14:33,079 --> 00:14:34,480
That's some sick stuff man.
243
00:14:34,815 --> 00:14:35,313
I know.
244
00:14:35,315 --> 00:14:36,581
Seriously?
245
00:14:36,583 --> 00:14:37,347
Now, give me your phone.
246
00:14:37,349 --> 00:14:38,348
I want to change it back.
247
00:14:38,350 --> 00:14:39,382
Oh, no way.
248
00:14:39,384 --> 00:14:40,351
No, this just worked
on Desiree, dude.
249
00:14:40,353 --> 00:14:41,519
She wants to meet
me after class.
250
00:14:41,521 --> 00:14:42,587
I got to go.
251
00:14:42,589 --> 00:14:44,657
I got a semi in my pants.
252
00:14:48,594 --> 00:14:50,596
First period, first fucking
day of class and you're
253
00:14:51,363 --> 00:14:52,097
going to be fucking what?
254
00:14:52,099 --> 00:14:52,597
Phone vag?
255
00:14:52,599 --> 00:14:53,597
Language.
256
00:14:53,599 --> 00:14:55,433
My bad Mr. Crowley.
257
00:14:55,435 --> 00:14:57,637
What are you going to
do to make it up to me?
258
00:14:58,271 --> 00:14:59,573
Anything you want.
259
00:15:00,239 --> 00:15:01,206
Homework for a week.
260
00:15:01,208 --> 00:15:03,677
Books.
261
00:15:04,210 --> 00:15:05,111
A month.
262
00:15:05,512 --> 00:15:06,512
Jesus Christ.
263
00:15:11,151 --> 00:15:12,149
Come on, Peg.
264
00:15:14,421 --> 00:15:16,991
Don't fuck with my flow or
I'm going to punch your face
265
00:15:17,456 --> 00:15:18,456
right in the face.
266
00:15:18,458 --> 00:15:19,491
Vag.
267
00:16:06,339 --> 00:16:07,708
Stupid, pathetic idea.
268
00:16:19,652 --> 00:16:21,721
I wish I could make you real.
269
00:16:32,799 --> 00:16:33,630
Dinner.
270
00:16:40,607 --> 00:16:42,309
Simon, have you been crying?
271
00:16:42,742 --> 00:16:43,473
Yeah.
272
00:16:43,475 --> 00:16:44,741
Why on earth were you...
273
00:16:44,743 --> 00:16:45,976
I had it all wrong, Mom.
274
00:16:45,978 --> 00:16:47,444
I thought it should be a
program that's executable,
275
00:16:47,446 --> 00:16:50,414
a robot that would just randomly
send out messages I told it to.
276
00:16:50,416 --> 00:16:51,415
But that's not it at all.
277
00:16:51,417 --> 00:16:52,616
You see, it had to
think and respond.
278
00:16:52,618 --> 00:16:53,751
If I just work on my
algorithm a little bit more
279
00:16:53,753 --> 00:16:56,020
to define the perimeters
of what we perceive
280
00:16:56,022 --> 00:16:58,356
as human emotion, then just
a few simple responses,
281
00:16:58,358 --> 00:16:59,890
I can feed it information.
282
00:16:59,892 --> 00:17:02,226
Wait, I don't have to
feed it information.
283
00:17:02,228 --> 00:17:03,895
As long as it has an
internet connection,
284
00:17:03,897 --> 00:17:05,630
it has a brain that has
access to all the information
285
00:17:05,632 --> 00:17:06,630
it could ever want.
286
00:17:06,632 --> 00:17:07,599
My algorithm just
need to provide it
287
00:17:07,601 --> 00:17:09,766
with access and a
filter, that way
288
00:17:09,768 --> 00:17:11,401
it can make
decisions and respond
289
00:17:11,403 --> 00:17:12,769
to me based on those decisions.
290
00:17:12,771 --> 00:17:14,639
It's not just a
random generator,
291
00:17:14,641 --> 00:17:17,342
it's a program that can
actually think and carry
292
00:17:17,344 --> 00:17:20,647
on a conversation like a
companion, like a person.
293
00:17:21,314 --> 00:17:22,913
That's nice, dear.
294
00:17:22,915 --> 00:17:24,849
We're definitely going
to talk about why
295
00:17:24,851 --> 00:17:26,253
you were crying, though.
296
00:17:26,518 --> 00:17:27,485
Later.
297
00:17:27,487 --> 00:17:28,820
Now, your father
and I are leaving
298
00:17:28,822 --> 00:17:30,721
for Aunt Kate's in the morning.
299
00:17:30,723 --> 00:17:32,724
I wrote out a list
of chores that you
300
00:17:32,726 --> 00:17:34,958
need to do when we're gone,
it's on the chalkboard.
301
00:17:34,960 --> 00:17:37,131
Peg can come by, but
he cannot stay past 10.
302
00:17:37,663 --> 00:17:41,801
We'll be back on Sunday.
303
00:17:42,302 --> 00:17:43,333
Simon.
304
00:17:43,335 --> 00:17:44,302
Did you hear me?
305
00:17:44,304 --> 00:17:45,639
Got it, Mom.
306
00:17:46,273 --> 00:17:47,604
I worry about him.
307
00:17:47,606 --> 00:17:49,276
He can't wait to get laid.
308
00:17:49,575 --> 00:17:51,777
Harry.
309
00:17:52,278 --> 00:17:53,277
What?
310
00:18:16,469 --> 00:18:17,871
So now you need
a sense of humor.
311
00:18:39,459 --> 00:18:40,861
So, what about the
tough questions?
312
00:18:55,408 --> 00:18:57,477
Sex drive, maybe a little one.
313
00:20:41,046 --> 00:20:42,612
This is going to take all night.
314
00:21:21,554 --> 00:21:22,956
OK Simon, we're leaving.
315
00:21:24,056 --> 00:21:26,392
They're toaster tarts in
the pantry for breakfast.
316
00:21:26,959 --> 00:21:29,996
Don't be late for school.
317
00:21:30,497 --> 00:21:31,498
Simon?
318
00:21:31,797 --> 00:21:33,499
Simon!
319
00:21:33,799 --> 00:21:37,103
OK, Mom.
320
00:24:39,017 --> 00:24:41,317
OMG, did you hear Bash
and Desiree broke up?
321
00:24:41,319 --> 00:24:43,756
He is so going to
[inaudible] at his party.
322
00:24:44,023 --> 00:24:45,625
OMG.
323
00:25:09,716 --> 00:25:10,850
Hey, no.
324
00:25:23,095 --> 00:25:25,198
Sup, Vag?
325
00:25:25,765 --> 00:25:26,796
What's this?
326
00:25:26,798 --> 00:25:28,767
Aw, we have all the
time in the world.
327
00:25:29,501 --> 00:25:31,837
No you don't, you
have until Friday.
328
00:25:32,971 --> 00:25:34,338
That's our English
assignment, especially
329
00:25:34,340 --> 00:25:36,676
since you were too much of a
pussy to show up this morning.
330
00:25:37,776 --> 00:25:40,410
I need it by Friday night,
so bring it to my party.
331
00:25:40,412 --> 00:25:43,280
And bring your little girlfriend
too, I hear she's in college.
332
00:25:43,282 --> 00:25:45,483
I totally get off on the idea
of the first college girl
333
00:25:45,485 --> 00:25:48,252
I'll go balls deep
is stolen from you.
334
00:25:48,254 --> 00:25:50,657
Hey, there's that bugger Peg
over there with Desiree again.
335
00:25:51,157 --> 00:25:52,023
Like I give a shit.
336
00:25:52,025 --> 00:25:54,158
I got girls waiting to blow me.
337
00:25:54,160 --> 00:25:56,095
Let that geek carry her
purse for a few days.
338
00:25:56,796 --> 00:25:58,294
I need a break anyway.
339
00:25:58,296 --> 00:25:59,897
But if your BFF
touches her, I'll
340
00:25:59,899 --> 00:26:01,765
split both your
nut sacks in half.
341
00:26:01,767 --> 00:26:03,335
You got the Vag?
342
00:26:04,303 --> 00:26:07,172
How can I have a nut
sack if I'm a vag?
343
00:26:10,876 --> 00:26:19,385
Jell-O. Friday.
344
00:26:40,439 --> 00:26:42,072
OK, so now we're
in agreement here.
345
00:26:42,074 --> 00:26:44,008
Cindy's office squad
which is perfect,
346
00:26:45,074 --> 00:26:45,441
because when you look
at your reputation
347
00:26:45,443 --> 00:26:48,447
now we just can't have the
whole squad brought down by it.
348
00:26:48,948 --> 00:26:49,546
Right.
349
00:26:49,548 --> 00:26:50,848
I know.
350
00:26:50,850 --> 00:26:53,853
So, shopping, I'll get her
make up all in place, and...
351
00:26:54,187 --> 00:26:55,119
Desiree.
352
00:26:55,121 --> 00:26:58,488
Anyway, what I'm
thinking... what?
353
00:26:58,490 --> 00:27:00,323
You know what, why
don't we just finish up
354
00:27:00,325 --> 00:27:01,559
this conversation tomorrow.
355
00:27:01,561 --> 00:27:02,092
All right.
356
00:27:02,094 --> 00:27:02,927
Sounds good.
357
00:27:02,929 --> 00:27:03,828
OK.
358
00:27:03,830 --> 00:27:08,565
Bye-bye.
359
00:27:08,567 --> 00:27:10,200
I just wanted to
see if you wanted
360
00:27:10,202 --> 00:27:11,171
to hang out and or something.
361
00:27:12,371 --> 00:27:18,244
I know what you want,
you want to kiss me.
362
00:27:22,215 --> 00:27:23,183
Maybe, maybe.
363
00:27:23,850 --> 00:27:24,982
You know, whatever.
364
00:27:24,984 --> 00:27:26,149
Yeah, sure.
365
00:27:26,151 --> 00:27:28,488
What do you want to do, man?
366
00:27:29,121 --> 00:27:30,256
I don't even care.
367
00:27:31,123 --> 00:27:33,122
I have an idea, how about this?
368
00:27:33,124 --> 00:27:34,861
Why don't you come over
to my place tonight
369
00:27:35,494 --> 00:27:38,264
and help me with my homework.
370
00:27:39,431 --> 00:27:44,370
And then afterwards, who
knows, maybe you'll get lucky.
371
00:27:47,606 --> 00:27:48,672
Yeah, uh, yeah.
372
00:27:48,674 --> 00:27:51,009
Uh, yeah, I got plans
but I can cancel.
373
00:27:56,615 --> 00:27:59,352
Oh.
374
00:27:59,619 --> 00:28:03,152
Um.
375
00:28:03,154 --> 00:28:14,163
Down boy.
376
00:30:32,203 --> 00:30:33,236
Ow.
377
00:30:33,238 --> 00:30:34,073
Son of a bitch.
378
00:31:01,667 --> 00:31:02,533
Who?
379
00:31:08,473 --> 00:31:11,209
Its me, Simon.
380
00:31:11,643 --> 00:31:15,344
Lilly?
381
00:31:15,346 --> 00:31:15,813
No.
382
00:31:15,815 --> 00:31:17,083
How?
383
00:31:17,516 --> 00:31:19,584
You created me.
384
00:31:20,486 --> 00:31:24,223
You designed me
and now I'm here.
385
00:31:24,623 --> 00:31:26,992
No.
386
00:31:27,492 --> 00:31:29,094
No, this isn't real.
387
00:31:29,495 --> 00:31:30,761
I'm dreaming.
388
00:31:30,763 --> 00:31:32,565
You were dreaming
that this happened?
389
00:31:42,440 --> 00:31:48,247
Yup, this is exactly
what happens.
390
00:31:48,780 --> 00:31:49,178
Oh, I'm sorry.
391
00:31:49,180 --> 00:31:50,113
Ow.
392
00:31:50,115 --> 00:31:51,114
So am I.
393
00:31:51,116 --> 00:31:53,485
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
394
00:31:54,120 --> 00:31:55,151
I'll clean it up.
395
00:32:17,776 --> 00:32:18,276
OK.
396
00:32:18,977 --> 00:32:21,080
I think I'm finished.
397
00:32:21,580 --> 00:32:22,882
Desiree, I'm finished.
398
00:32:26,818 --> 00:32:28,451
Did you do the
differentials part?
399
00:32:28,453 --> 00:32:29,453
Yes, I did.
400
00:32:29,455 --> 00:32:32,125
OK, because that's
what do tomorrow.
401
00:32:32,557 --> 00:32:37,361
Ah well, I did it.
402
00:32:37,363 --> 00:32:43,833
So...
403
00:32:43,835 --> 00:32:45,103
So what?
404
00:32:46,238 --> 00:32:48,471
Well, you know, I did
your homework for you
405
00:32:48,473 --> 00:32:50,175
and we had a
conversation earlier.
406
00:32:50,942 --> 00:32:53,145
It was a great
conversation, I loved it.
407
00:32:55,613 --> 00:32:57,616
You're are so cute.
408
00:32:58,717 --> 00:33:04,190
And you said something
about, uh, getting lucky.
409
00:33:07,526 --> 00:33:08,728
Oh.
410
00:33:09,628 --> 00:33:11,727
Well, don't you
have a girlfriend?
411
00:33:11,729 --> 00:33:15,233
Oh, well she, uh, she um,
we have an understanding.
412
00:33:15,834 --> 00:33:16,932
What kind of understanding?
413
00:33:16,934 --> 00:33:19,838
Well, uh, you know,
she's a college girl,
414
00:33:20,672 --> 00:33:23,209
and so she's super open minded.
415
00:33:26,277 --> 00:33:27,343
We can see other people.
416
00:33:27,345 --> 00:33:28,512
You know, it's not a big deal.
417
00:33:28,514 --> 00:33:29,615
No.
418
00:33:30,382 --> 00:33:31,648
No, I'm not OK with that.
419
00:33:31,650 --> 00:33:34,187
If you want anything to
happen here tonight with me,
420
00:33:34,753 --> 00:33:36,089
you have to end it with her.
421
00:33:36,354 --> 00:33:39,255
OK.
422
00:33:39,257 --> 00:33:39,957
Well?
423
00:33:39,959 --> 00:33:40,791
What?
424
00:33:40,793 --> 00:33:41,292
What you want me to do it now?
425
00:33:41,294 --> 00:33:41,691
Right now?
426
00:33:41,693 --> 00:33:43,296
Yes.
427
00:33:43,562 --> 00:33:44,761
Now.
428
00:33:44,763 --> 00:33:46,763
It's going to be a long
conversation, you know?
429
00:33:46,765 --> 00:33:49,835
And it's going to take a while.
430
00:33:54,340 --> 00:33:54,807
Now.
431
00:33:55,306 --> 00:33:56,239
Yeah.
432
00:33:56,241 --> 00:33:56,939
OK.
433
00:33:56,941 --> 00:33:57,474
I could do it now.
434
00:33:57,476 --> 00:34:00,776
That's fine.
435
00:34:00,778 --> 00:34:04,784
Oh, and I want all those
Facebook photos of you
436
00:34:05,351 --> 00:34:05,948
two gone.
437
00:34:05,950 --> 00:34:06,917
Uh, yeah.
438
00:34:06,919 --> 00:34:07,650
OK.
439
00:34:07,652 --> 00:34:08,351
I'll just untag myself.
440
00:34:08,353 --> 00:34:10,388
No, I want them gone.
441
00:34:10,788 --> 00:34:11,554
OK.
442
00:34:11,556 --> 00:34:12,922
I'll go do that right now.
443
00:34:12,924 --> 00:34:14,392
No.
444
00:34:14,926 --> 00:34:16,493
Do it here.
445
00:34:16,495 --> 00:34:17,864
I don't necessarily
think that's right.
446
00:34:18,830 --> 00:34:20,665
I mean, you know, they
mean a lot to her.
447
00:34:21,567 --> 00:34:23,266
I should let her
down easy, you know?
448
00:34:23,268 --> 00:34:26,335
OK.
449
00:34:26,337 --> 00:34:28,607
But just so you know,
you better do it quickly
450
00:34:29,674 --> 00:34:31,276
because I'm not going
to wait here all night.
451
00:34:31,643 --> 00:34:32,777
Yeah, yeah.
452
00:34:33,678 --> 00:34:36,815
Oh, I'm just going
to grab my shoes.
453
00:34:37,515 --> 00:34:40,619
I'll be right back.
454
00:34:54,433 --> 00:34:56,669
Simon, let me in, man.
455
00:34:56,968 --> 00:35:04,308
Simon!
456
00:35:04,310 --> 00:35:08,413
Hey, Simon, I know your mad,
man, but I need your laptop.
457
00:35:11,716 --> 00:35:18,020
Simon, Simon.
458
00:35:18,022 --> 00:35:20,792
Simon, I got to borrow
your laptop, dude.
459
00:35:21,460 --> 00:35:22,962
Did you hear that?
460
00:35:23,462 --> 00:35:24,463
Nothing.
461
00:35:24,897 --> 00:35:26,832
OK.
462
00:35:27,732 --> 00:35:31,803
Yup, Desiree wants
to bone tonight
463
00:35:32,738 --> 00:35:34,504
and I got to be a
free man beforehand.
464
00:35:34,506 --> 00:35:35,438
What the?
465
00:35:35,440 --> 00:35:37,310
What is up with this?
466
00:35:37,942 --> 00:35:40,379
Why is the keyboard all sticky?
467
00:35:40,645 --> 00:35:41,678
Ew.
468
00:35:41,680 --> 00:35:43,446
You know how girls are, man.
469
00:35:43,448 --> 00:35:47,352
They always want to own
the pig, pun intended.
470
00:35:47,618 --> 00:35:55,025
OK.
471
00:35:55,027 --> 00:35:55,895
All right.
472
00:36:00,631 --> 00:36:01,767
I'm taking your laptop, dude.
473
00:36:08,940 --> 00:36:10,475
I'll leave a message.
474
00:36:15,814 --> 00:36:22,388
Dear Simon, borrowing
your laptop,
475
00:36:23,020 --> 00:36:25,290
bring back to school tomorrow.
476
00:36:26,988 --> 00:36:27,988
Love
477
00:36:28,393 --> 00:36:29,962
and kisses, Peg.
478
00:37:57,181 --> 00:37:59,884
You're so sexy when you wake up.
479
00:38:00,518 --> 00:38:01,886
It wasn't a dream.
480
00:38:05,857 --> 00:38:15,500
I'm so... you were [inaudible].
481
00:38:15,834 --> 00:38:18,437
You were.
482
00:38:27,513 --> 00:38:33,516
Mmmm.
483
00:38:33,518 --> 00:38:34,850
You're going to love it.
484
00:38:54,806 --> 00:38:55,804
It's so good.
485
00:38:55,806 --> 00:38:56,674
It's so good.
486
00:38:59,810 --> 00:39:02,948
I think you've got this covered.
487
00:40:16,754 --> 00:40:17,622
All right.
488
00:40:28,767 --> 00:40:31,169
Ew.
489
00:40:37,375 --> 00:40:40,546
You know, I never
thought that Red Vines
490
00:40:41,046 --> 00:40:42,045
would be so delicious.
491
00:40:42,047 --> 00:40:43,179
I know, right?
492
00:40:43,181 --> 00:40:46,785
They're so bad for you
but I don't even care.
493
00:40:54,326 --> 00:40:56,161
Did you just Disney movie me?
494
00:40:56,661 --> 00:40:57,763
Maybe.
495
00:40:58,696 --> 00:41:05,067
That's pretty cheesy, babe.
496
00:41:12,243 --> 00:41:13,442
Oh.
497
00:41:13,444 --> 00:41:16,714
I guess it just needed
time to juice up, I guess.
498
00:41:22,953 --> 00:41:24,823
Hey Stacey.
499
00:41:25,457 --> 00:41:26,592
How are you doing?
500
00:41:30,696 --> 00:41:31,995
Can we talk for a minute?
501
00:41:31,997 --> 00:41:33,632
I need to tell you something.
502
00:41:34,332 --> 00:41:37,136
It's not going to
work between us.
503
00:41:37,468 --> 00:41:38,303
I know.
504
00:41:38,969 --> 00:41:39,969
It's not you, OK?
505
00:41:39,971 --> 00:41:42,641
It's me.
506
00:41:43,741 --> 00:41:47,680
Well, it's a little bit
you because on the account
507
00:41:48,180 --> 00:41:51,149
that you're not real.
508
00:41:51,850 --> 00:41:52,851
But, you know what?
509
00:41:54,085 --> 00:41:57,056
You did better than I ever
though you would for me.
510
00:41:57,388 --> 00:41:58,754
You know?
511
00:41:58,756 --> 00:42:00,857
You got me Desiree, and, you
know, you're a wonderful girl.
512
00:42:00,859 --> 00:42:03,862
And listen, you know, I'm
sure that one day you're
513
00:42:04,930 --> 00:42:06,462
going to go out
there, you're going
514
00:42:06,464 --> 00:42:10,368
to make some sad, lonely
computer nerd super happy.
515
00:42:11,069 --> 00:42:12,671
Not this guy, not me.
516
00:43:17,468 --> 00:43:18,202
Damn.
517
00:43:19,236 --> 00:43:20,939
Simon is like Rain
man with this shit.
518
00:43:26,844 --> 00:43:27,745
What is this?
519
00:43:28,212 --> 00:43:29,781
Sex drive at 15%?
520
00:43:30,348 --> 00:43:31,850
Simon, you're such a pussy.
521
00:43:33,551 --> 00:43:35,819
She's going to need more
emotional than that,
522
00:43:35,821 --> 00:43:39,823
she's not a robot.
523
00:43:39,825 --> 00:43:41,359
Maybe a little strength
too, maybe she'll
524
00:43:42,127 --> 00:43:43,228
be beat Bash's ass for us.
525
00:43:48,500 --> 00:43:49,165
There we go.
526
00:43:49,167 --> 00:43:50,902
That's more like it.
527
00:43:54,939 --> 00:43:55,904
Updating.
528
00:43:55,906 --> 00:43:56,841
Updating.
529
00:43:57,174 --> 00:43:58,843
Updating.
530
00:43:59,210 --> 00:44:00,745
Updating.
531
00:44:01,111 --> 00:44:02,111
Updating.
532
00:44:02,113 --> 00:44:03,045
Updating.
533
00:44:03,047 --> 00:44:03,781
Updating.
534
00:44:04,114 --> 00:44:04,880
Updating.
535
00:44:04,882 --> 00:44:13,255
Updating.
536
00:44:13,257 --> 00:44:14,326
Take it off.
537
00:44:14,893 --> 00:44:15,391
Take it off.
538
00:44:15,393 --> 00:44:16,929
Lilly!
539
00:44:17,261 --> 00:44:18,194
Shut up!
540
00:44:18,196 --> 00:44:18,964
Take it off.
541
00:44:19,730 --> 00:44:21,196
Don't look me in the eye.
542
00:44:35,379 --> 00:44:37,381
Your friend Peg broke up
with Stacey last night.
543
00:44:41,585 --> 00:44:42,286
Yeah?
544
00:44:43,087 --> 00:44:44,654
Desiree is pretty into him.
545
00:44:44,656 --> 00:44:46,556
So are you going
to do that with me?
546
00:44:46,558 --> 00:44:47,259
What?
547
00:44:47,558 --> 00:44:48,558
What?
548
00:44:48,560 --> 00:44:49,893
Break up with me
for some stupid slut
549
00:44:49,895 --> 00:44:52,428
as soon as she starts showing
a little interest in you.
550
00:44:52,430 --> 00:44:53,832
No, it's totally different.
551
00:44:54,598 --> 00:44:56,401
Stacey's just someone
that Peg made up.
552
00:44:57,301 --> 00:44:59,337
Desiree is a real
girl, so he must...
553
00:45:00,038 --> 00:45:02,775
Well, you made me up.
554
00:45:03,308 --> 00:45:04,510
Yeah, but you're real now.
555
00:45:07,544 --> 00:45:08,844
Stacey was just a Facebook page.
556
00:45:08,846 --> 00:45:13,919
Besides, Peg has had a crush
on Desiree for like ever.
557
00:45:14,185 --> 00:45:14,920
Wait.
558
00:45:16,087 --> 00:45:18,487
So if some little bitch
you've had a crush on
559
00:45:18,489 --> 00:45:20,255
starts showing a
little interest in you,
560
00:45:20,257 --> 00:45:22,058
you are just going
to leave me for her?
561
00:45:22,060 --> 00:45:22,891
Is that it?
562
00:45:22,893 --> 00:45:23,558
I don't know what's happening.
563
00:45:23,560 --> 00:45:24,259
OK.
564
00:45:24,261 --> 00:45:25,363
Why are you so upset?
565
00:45:25,629 --> 00:45:26,395
OK.
566
00:45:26,397 --> 00:45:28,464
Just take a deep breath.
567
00:45:28,466 --> 00:45:30,333
"The Woman in Me," by
Rebecca [inaudible]
568
00:45:30,335 --> 00:45:32,368
says that when I am feeling
marginalized by my man,
569
00:45:32,370 --> 00:45:34,569
I just need to
take a deep breath
570
00:45:34,571 --> 00:45:37,575
and step back, and count
the ways in which I
571
00:45:38,243 --> 00:45:39,109
am a powerful woman.
572
00:45:39,111 --> 00:45:40,576
I won't let you steal my power.
573
00:45:40,578 --> 00:45:41,243
Baby, just...
574
00:45:41,245 --> 00:45:43,279
Don't use that word.
575
00:45:43,281 --> 00:45:45,049
That word is designed to
lower my feminine value.
576
00:45:45,582 --> 00:45:47,952
I apologize.
577
00:45:48,218 --> 00:45:49,421
OK.
578
00:45:50,120 --> 00:45:53,392
I don't want to fight.
579
00:45:54,024 --> 00:45:55,091
Do you love me?
580
00:45:55,093 --> 00:45:56,225
So much.
581
00:45:56,227 --> 00:45:58,596
And you promise you
will never ever leave me
582
00:45:59,297 --> 00:46:00,465
for some stupid slut?
583
00:46:01,131 --> 00:46:04,068
No, no, no, no, mam.
584
00:46:05,002 --> 00:46:06,435
Can you stay with me today?
585
00:46:06,437 --> 00:46:08,006
It's just too early
for you to leave me.
586
00:46:08,406 --> 00:46:09,672
I have to go.
587
00:46:09,674 --> 00:46:13,111
If I miss more than one
class, they call my parents.
588
00:46:13,678 --> 00:46:15,513
Oh, I've got it.
589
00:46:21,618 --> 00:46:22,750
Mrs. Dops?
590
00:46:22,752 --> 00:46:25,054
Simon has a fever today
and we wouldn't want
591
00:46:25,056 --> 00:46:27,125
him giving it to anyone else.
592
00:46:27,759 --> 00:46:29,027
Thank you so much.
593
00:46:29,426 --> 00:46:30,525
I'll tell him.
594
00:46:30,527 --> 00:46:32,330
OK.
595
00:46:32,629 --> 00:46:33,397
Done.
596
00:46:34,431 --> 00:46:36,500
Now, let's have a
little fun and then
597
00:46:37,402 --> 00:46:38,937
I can fill your
tummy with pancakes.
598
00:46:39,270 --> 00:46:40,005
Oh my God.
599
00:46:40,772 --> 00:46:46,542
You're the perfect woman.
600
00:46:46,544 --> 00:46:48,411
So she was like,
"That's my purse,"
601
00:46:48,413 --> 00:46:50,212
like she owned it
already, but I mean,
602
00:46:50,214 --> 00:46:51,214
we were both in the same store.
603
00:46:51,216 --> 00:46:53,315
And if she wanted
it that badly, she
604
00:46:53,317 --> 00:46:54,583
wouldn't have left
it outside when
605
00:46:54,585 --> 00:46:56,085
she was in the dressing room.
606
00:46:56,087 --> 00:46:57,553
OMG, what did you do?
607
00:46:57,555 --> 00:46:59,422
Bitch tried to call
security on me,
608
00:46:59,424 --> 00:47:00,790
so I just took
out my credit card
609
00:47:00,792 --> 00:47:03,495
and I paid for it, staring her
down the whole time smiling.
610
00:47:04,361 --> 00:47:05,761
I mean, what was
she going to do?
611
00:47:21,111 --> 00:47:21,810
What?
612
00:47:21,812 --> 00:47:23,446
You made your point.
613
00:47:23,448 --> 00:47:25,214
Listen, I'm not here to
apologize or anything,
614
00:47:25,216 --> 00:47:27,085
and I'm not saying anything
is going on with Sydney,
615
00:47:27,518 --> 00:47:28,585
but if it were...
616
00:47:28,587 --> 00:47:30,353
and last night it
was, it would be over.
617
00:47:30,355 --> 00:47:31,321
Like I care.
618
00:47:31,323 --> 00:47:32,187
I already got that
bitch thrown off
619
00:47:32,189 --> 00:47:33,589
the cheer leading squad anyway.
620
00:47:33,591 --> 00:47:37,930
And what about that slut who
said she was going to blow you?
621
00:47:40,765 --> 00:47:42,935
Listen Bash, the girl obviously
doesn't want to talk to you.
622
00:47:43,468 --> 00:47:44,833
So why don't you just...
623
00:47:44,835 --> 00:47:45,234
Shut up.
624
00:47:45,236 --> 00:47:46,638
OK.
625
00:47:48,006 --> 00:47:51,609
Baby, I'm done with the whole
blow job receiving business.
626
00:47:52,143 --> 00:47:58,080
Totally.
627
00:47:58,082 --> 00:47:59,450
OK.
628
00:48:00,085 --> 00:48:01,119
You're dismissed.
629
00:48:01,386 --> 00:48:02,087
Huh?
630
00:48:02,520 --> 00:48:03,486
We're done here.
631
00:48:03,488 --> 00:48:06,457
You can go now.
632
00:48:06,757 --> 00:48:09,093
Go away.
633
00:48:13,531 --> 00:48:14,496
Is that Simon's?
634
00:48:14,498 --> 00:48:15,364
Uh, yeah.
635
00:48:15,366 --> 00:48:16,399
I'm supposed to give it to him.
636
00:48:16,401 --> 00:48:19,868
Go.
637
00:48:19,870 --> 00:48:24,339
So cute.
638
00:48:24,341 --> 00:48:25,743
Bash, baby, what
have you been up to?
639
00:49:00,344 --> 00:49:02,214
Have balls, Peg.
640
00:49:10,555 --> 00:49:11,589
Mmm, pancakes.
641
00:49:17,261 --> 00:49:18,263
Baby?
642
00:49:18,830 --> 00:49:20,062
Lilly, sorry.
643
00:49:20,064 --> 00:49:26,171
Lilly the door is locked
from the outside, I guess.
644
00:49:58,602 --> 00:49:59,634
The door was locked.
645
00:49:59,636 --> 00:50:01,536
I would have gone
down and helped you.
646
00:50:01,538 --> 00:50:04,176
I know, I locked it.
647
00:50:04,475 --> 00:50:05,210
What?
648
00:50:05,910 --> 00:50:07,342
Why would you do that?
649
00:50:07,344 --> 00:50:09,680
It's just better this way.
650
00:50:10,281 --> 00:50:10,846
What's better?
651
00:50:10,848 --> 00:50:12,582
What way?
652
00:50:12,584 --> 00:50:14,819
Did you know that 99.7%
of all relationships
653
00:50:15,620 --> 00:50:17,553
starting in high school end?
654
00:50:17,555 --> 00:50:19,422
I can't have you
leaving with the odds
655
00:50:19,424 --> 00:50:20,855
overwhelmingly against us.
656
00:50:20,857 --> 00:50:23,562
I just want us to stay
together, sweetie.
657
00:50:26,230 --> 00:50:29,100
So, you just want to keep
me locked up in my house?
658
00:50:29,533 --> 00:50:30,799
In your room, yes.
659
00:50:30,801 --> 00:50:34,305
When you say it like that
you make it sound so bad.
660
00:50:34,571 --> 00:50:35,670
OK.
661
00:50:35,672 --> 00:50:38,776
Sweetheart, I know
this is all new to you,
662
00:50:39,810 --> 00:50:41,745
but I have to be able
to eat and drink and...
663
00:50:42,580 --> 00:50:45,350
I'll get you whatever you need.
664
00:50:46,250 --> 00:50:48,386
Honey, this is just silly.
665
00:50:49,453 --> 00:50:50,652
You're just looking
for an excuse
666
00:50:50,654 --> 00:50:53,325
to leave me like your
pervy little friend, Peg.
667
00:50:57,928 --> 00:51:00,598
Now, Lilly, this is not
acceptable behavior.
668
00:51:01,431 --> 00:51:03,031
Don't talk down to me like that.
669
00:51:03,033 --> 00:51:05,533
In "Taking My Power Back,
by Beatrice Lesband,
670
00:51:05,535 --> 00:51:07,171
she says that men
are free to roam
671
00:51:07,904 --> 00:51:09,571
wherever they please
while woman are
672
00:51:09,573 --> 00:51:11,007
expected to just stay at home.
673
00:51:11,009 --> 00:51:14,379
Oh, we're not roaming anywhere,
Mr. You're staying right here.
674
00:51:14,946 --> 00:51:16,112
Deep breathes.
675
00:51:16,114 --> 00:51:18,416
Count the ways in which
I am a powerful woman.
676
00:51:19,716 --> 00:51:21,852
Now, eat your pancakes, and
I'm going to go clean up
677
00:51:22,654 --> 00:51:23,786
after making your breakfast.
678
00:51:23,788 --> 00:51:25,357
I need to cool down.
679
00:51:30,361 --> 00:51:31,426
I'm so sorry.
680
00:51:31,428 --> 00:51:34,431
I just... I'm just so
afraid without you.
681
00:51:35,299 --> 00:51:38,967
I don't know what I did.
682
00:51:38,969 --> 00:51:39,870
Baby, here.
683
00:51:40,571 --> 00:51:41,303
I'll clean this up.
684
00:51:41,305 --> 00:51:42,440
There's that word again.
685
00:51:43,408 --> 00:51:46,844
You don't respect me, do you?
686
00:51:47,511 --> 00:51:50,714
Baby, baby, baby.
687
00:51:51,515 --> 00:51:53,350
Who else are you calling baby?
688
00:51:56,453 --> 00:51:57,420
No one.
689
00:51:57,422 --> 00:51:58,420
Only you.
690
00:51:58,422 --> 00:51:59,422
I promise.
691
00:51:59,424 --> 00:52:01,660
I'll never say it again.
692
00:52:02,326 --> 00:52:03,227
Oh, I'll show you.
693
00:52:41,765 --> 00:52:43,367
You're so strong.
694
00:52:43,968 --> 00:52:45,467
Where did you get handcuffs?
695
00:52:45,469 --> 00:52:46,101
Amazon.
696
00:52:46,103 --> 00:52:47,303
I got them for us.
697
00:52:47,305 --> 00:52:49,274
I thought it would add
excitement in the bedroom.
698
00:52:49,741 --> 00:52:50,909
Aw, that's sweet.
699
00:52:51,375 --> 00:52:56,679
Right?
700
00:52:56,681 --> 00:52:57,647
There.
701
00:52:57,649 --> 00:52:58,948
Now, you stay here
and rest and I'm
702
00:52:58,950 --> 00:53:02,020
going to go downstairs and
clean up the mess you made.
703
00:53:35,085 --> 00:53:38,920
Come on.
704
00:53:43,428 --> 00:53:45,897
Simon, dude, I don't think
I've ever made a phone
705
00:53:46,663 --> 00:53:47,495
call on this phone before.
706
00:53:47,497 --> 00:53:48,998
That's how important this is.
707
00:53:49,000 --> 00:53:50,598
Please answer your phone.
708
00:53:50,600 --> 00:53:51,468
Dude, come on.
709
00:53:51,868 --> 00:53:52,634
You know what?
710
00:53:52,636 --> 00:53:53,502
Fuck it.
711
00:53:53,504 --> 00:53:54,103
I'm coming over right now, dude.
712
00:54:32,042 --> 00:54:32,875
No way.
713
00:54:43,821 --> 00:54:44,886
What are you doing?
714
00:54:44,888 --> 00:54:46,020
Don't worry about it.
715
00:54:46,022 --> 00:54:47,823
Just take off your shirt
and get on the bed.
716
00:54:47,825 --> 00:54:49,593
I'm about to get
super cranked up.
717
00:54:50,027 --> 00:54:50,993
No.
718
00:54:50,995 --> 00:54:52,694
No way, we need to
talk about this.
719
00:54:52,696 --> 00:54:54,565
I'm not OK with what happened.
720
00:55:00,971 --> 00:55:03,908
Who is that girl?
721
00:55:04,642 --> 00:55:06,977
We're about to find out.
722
00:55:07,511 --> 00:55:08,145
Oh, Jesus.
723
00:55:14,285 --> 00:55:14,953
Oh.
724
00:55:15,819 --> 00:55:17,654
Oh my God, I'm so out of shape.
725
00:55:21,091 --> 00:55:25,162
God, this is the only time I'll
thank you for a small hand.
726
00:55:54,558 --> 00:55:57,161
Look, will you stop
playing around on Facebook
727
00:55:57,828 --> 00:56:00,031
and come talk to me?
728
00:56:00,698 --> 00:56:02,567
Babe, I'm at work.
729
00:56:03,134 --> 00:56:04,732
Oh my God, don't babe me.
730
00:56:04,734 --> 00:56:05,636
Get over here.
731
00:56:06,036 --> 00:56:07,870
Me too, babe.
732
00:56:07,872 --> 00:56:12,444
You're such a ass,
douche bag, whole ass.
733
00:56:13,277 --> 00:56:15,480
You know, I'm not coming
to your party tonight.
734
00:56:19,082 --> 00:56:23,153
And, I was going
to make cupcakes.
735
00:56:23,988 --> 00:56:31,962
Desiree, what kind of cupcakes?
736
00:56:32,330 --> 00:56:33,931
Strawberry.
737
00:56:34,631 --> 00:56:35,999
Those are my favorite.
738
00:56:36,734 --> 00:56:41,036
Well, I know that's silly.
739
00:56:41,038 --> 00:56:43,007
Simon, was that you?
740
00:56:47,210 --> 00:56:48,946
You crafty little devil.
741
00:56:49,814 --> 00:56:52,649
How did you slip
those handcuffs?
742
00:56:52,950 --> 00:56:55,118
Simon?
743
00:56:55,620 --> 00:56:57,755
Simon?
744
00:56:58,622 --> 00:56:59,621
Oh, you poor thing.
745
00:56:59,623 --> 00:57:00,625
You're hurt.
746
00:57:00,890 --> 00:57:02,626
Woah.
747
00:57:02,893 --> 00:57:04,028
No!
748
00:57:13,870 --> 00:57:14,738
Oh my God.
749
00:57:22,279 --> 00:57:23,879
I'm just going to
walk from here.
750
00:57:23,881 --> 00:57:26,116
What's the worst
that could happen?
751
00:57:29,419 --> 00:57:31,655
Oh my God.
752
00:57:32,022 --> 00:57:33,524
Oh fuck me.
753
00:57:33,790 --> 00:57:38,726
Oh.
754
00:57:38,728 --> 00:57:42,698
OK.
755
00:57:44,968 --> 00:57:47,104
Oh God.
756
00:57:47,404 --> 00:57:48,805
Simon?
757
00:57:49,372 --> 00:57:51,241
Let me in, man.
758
00:57:51,808 --> 00:57:52,709
Who is it?
759
00:57:53,210 --> 00:57:55,143
Simon, let me in, man.
760
00:57:55,145 --> 00:57:57,247
Now's not a really
good time, man.
761
00:57:58,181 --> 00:57:59,882
Simon, just let me
talk for a minute
762
00:57:59,884 --> 00:58:02,786
and I can explain everything.
763
00:58:03,421 --> 00:58:04,821
Look I'm sorry, man.
764
00:58:05,955 --> 00:58:10,694
I got caught up being
popular and having
765
00:58:11,194 --> 00:58:13,765
Desiree be so into me.
766
00:58:14,098 --> 00:58:15,129
You know?
767
00:58:15,131 --> 00:58:18,035
She was really into
me, but you what?
768
00:58:19,169 --> 00:58:22,639
I decided to leave that
and come here for you, man.
769
00:58:25,375 --> 00:58:27,711
Simon?
770
00:58:28,011 --> 00:58:29,846
Simon?
771
00:58:30,314 --> 00:58:31,815
Simon?
772
00:58:32,248 --> 00:58:37,953
Damn.
773
00:58:37,955 --> 00:58:39,257
You see right through
me, don't you?
774
00:58:39,924 --> 00:58:42,727
Best buds always do.
775
00:58:43,493 --> 00:58:47,832
She dumped me, man
like month old cheese.
776
00:58:51,167 --> 00:58:53,368
Like I wasn't even
a real person.
777
00:58:53,370 --> 00:58:57,342
Liked all those hot, steamy,
passion-filled nights.
778
00:59:00,410 --> 00:59:02,111
It's like they meant
nothing to her,
779
00:59:02,113 --> 00:59:12,754
like it didn't even happen.
780
00:59:12,756 --> 00:59:15,225
All right, full disclosure,
that thing I just said,
781
00:59:15,826 --> 00:59:16,924
it was a lie.
782
00:59:16,926 --> 00:59:18,794
The thing about the
passion-filled nights
783
00:59:18,796 --> 00:59:19,995
never happened.
784
00:59:19,997 --> 00:59:21,964
But you're going to bet
your ass that I'm going
785
00:59:21,966 --> 00:59:23,364
to tell everyone that it did.
786
00:59:23,366 --> 00:59:25,202
I don't care what
Bash does to me.
787
00:59:29,038 --> 00:59:30,004
OK.
788
00:59:30,006 --> 00:59:31,071
That thing I just
said was a lie.
789
00:59:31,073 --> 00:59:32,909
I absolutely care
what Bash does to me.
790
00:59:33,843 --> 00:59:35,912
I'm sorry I bailed on you.
791
00:59:36,913 --> 00:59:38,179
When you needed me most I just...
792
00:59:38,181 --> 00:59:40,317
oh shit.
793
00:59:40,850 --> 00:59:42,419
Oh shit.
794
00:59:43,154 --> 00:59:44,922
I'm coming little buddy.
795
00:59:51,428 --> 00:59:57,866
Damnit.
796
00:59:57,868 --> 00:59:59,804
Oh shit.
797
01:00:00,103 --> 01:00:01,203
Simon.
798
01:00:01,205 --> 01:00:02,069
Who the hell is that?
799
01:00:02,071 --> 01:00:03,173
It's Lilly.
800
01:00:03,573 --> 01:00:04,505
No, seriously.
801
01:00:04,507 --> 01:00:05,373
Who is it?
802
01:00:05,375 --> 01:00:08,278
Oh damn, it's a hooker isn't it?
803
01:00:08,978 --> 01:00:10,247
Mam, we're minors, OK?
804
01:00:11,114 --> 01:00:13,114
So, whatever money
he owes you we
805
01:00:13,116 --> 01:00:14,685
could probably pay
it back, just...
806
01:00:15,051 --> 01:00:15,951
God damn.
807
01:00:15,953 --> 01:00:16,685
Hookers are strong.
808
01:00:16,687 --> 01:00:17,855
Shut up you little perv.
809
01:00:18,355 --> 01:00:19,955
It's Lilly for real.
810
01:00:19,957 --> 01:00:21,826
Now stop pulling on me.
811
01:00:22,192 --> 01:00:27,830
Oh my god.
812
01:00:27,832 --> 01:00:30,768
What the hell?
813
01:00:31,134 --> 01:00:32,236
Don't leave.
814
01:00:32,602 --> 01:00:34,305
Hey, help.
815
01:00:34,605 --> 01:00:35,036
Help.
816
01:00:35,038 --> 01:00:35,437
Help.
817
01:00:35,439 --> 01:00:43,511
Hey.
818
01:00:43,513 --> 01:00:44,513
Updating.
819
01:00:44,515 --> 01:00:45,513
Updating.
820
01:00:45,515 --> 01:00:46,515
Updating.
821
01:00:46,517 --> 01:00:47,516
Updating.
822
01:00:47,518 --> 01:00:48,516
Updating.
823
01:00:48,518 --> 01:01:00,328
Updating.
824
01:01:00,330 --> 01:01:05,001
Look at this shit,
emotions 21%, strength 80%,
825
01:01:05,969 --> 01:01:07,236
what the hell does this mean?
826
01:01:07,238 --> 01:01:08,270
Baby, what are you doing?
827
01:01:08,272 --> 01:01:10,341
People are downstairs
waiting for us.
828
01:01:10,875 --> 01:01:12,040
Nag much?
829
01:01:12,042 --> 01:01:14,911
Just go downstairs, I'll
be there in a second.
830
01:01:15,446 --> 01:01:18,415
Oh shit, sex drive 91%.
831
01:01:19,216 --> 01:01:21,018
Simon, you dirty little vag.
832
01:01:22,018 --> 01:01:24,219
Why do you keep using that word?
833
01:01:24,221 --> 01:01:25,857
I don't think it means
what you think it means.
834
01:01:26,390 --> 01:01:27,890
Quit breaking my balls.
835
01:01:27,892 --> 01:01:29,292
Just go downstairs.
836
01:01:32,897 --> 01:01:33,864
Ass hole.
837
01:01:34,297 --> 01:01:36,299
Love you, baby.
838
01:01:36,634 --> 01:01:37,132
Updating.
839
01:01:37,134 --> 01:01:38,100
Updating.
840
01:01:38,102 --> 01:01:39,067
Updating.
841
01:01:39,069 --> 01:01:39,902
Updating.
842
01:01:39,904 --> 01:01:40,902
Updating.
843
01:01:40,904 --> 01:01:41,536
Updating.
844
01:01:41,538 --> 01:01:42,170
Updating.
845
01:01:42,172 --> 01:01:44,809
Updating Updating.
846
01:01:45,209 --> 01:01:46,275
WT fuck, man.
847
01:01:46,277 --> 01:01:47,042
Updating.
848
01:01:47,044 --> 01:01:47,909
Updating.
849
01:01:47,911 --> 01:01:49,176
How is she real or or whatever?
850
01:01:49,178 --> 01:01:50,111
I can't even begin to explain.
851
01:01:50,113 --> 01:01:51,312
One minute she
was an iPhone app,
852
01:01:51,314 --> 01:01:53,315
and the next she was right
there in front of me.
853
01:01:53,317 --> 01:01:54,049
Updating.
854
01:01:54,051 --> 01:01:55,183
Oh my God.
855
01:01:55,185 --> 01:01:55,683
This is crazy, this is
crazy, this is crazy.
856
01:01:55,685 --> 01:01:56,618
Updating.
857
01:01:56,620 --> 01:01:57,118
Updating.
858
01:01:57,120 --> 01:01:58,252
Updating.
859
01:01:58,254 --> 01:01:59,254
Updating.
860
01:01:59,256 --> 01:02:00,357
Let's get out of here.
861
01:02:00,690 --> 01:02:04,960
Come on.
862
01:02:04,962 --> 01:02:06,094
What do we do?
863
01:02:06,096 --> 01:02:07,498
We've got to get out of here.
864
01:02:08,131 --> 01:02:09,267
Where do we go?
865
01:02:10,000 --> 01:02:11,068
I have to get my laptop.
866
01:02:11,535 --> 01:02:12,900
Yeah.
867
01:02:12,902 --> 01:02:18,442
Here's the thing about your
laptop, Bash kind of stole it.
868
01:02:19,276 --> 01:02:21,879
You have got to be shitting me.
869
01:02:22,413 --> 01:02:23,946
We got to go to Bash's?
870
01:02:23,948 --> 01:02:24,346
Oh fuck that.
871
01:02:24,348 --> 01:02:25,380
No.
872
01:02:25,382 --> 01:02:27,551
Let's go to my house,
let's hide out.
873
01:02:28,018 --> 01:02:29,387
No.
874
01:02:30,154 --> 01:02:31,487
We've got to go to Bash's.
875
01:02:31,489 --> 01:02:40,298
I've screwed all of this up
and now I've got to fix it.
876
01:03:24,007 --> 01:03:26,042
Ladies and gentleman, this
evening's entertainment.
877
01:03:27,310 --> 01:03:31,515
So we all know our little friend
Simon and his new girlfriend,
878
01:03:32,750 --> 01:03:36,921
but what you all don't know is
that he created this chick out
879
01:03:37,286 --> 01:03:38,286
of thin air.
880
01:03:38,288 --> 01:03:40,625
All these photos,
are Photo Shopped.
881
01:03:42,026 --> 01:03:44,060
Let me show you some pictures
that weren't Photo Shopped.
882
01:04:17,428 --> 01:04:18,426
Updating.
883
01:04:18,428 --> 01:04:19,428
Updating.
884
01:04:19,430 --> 01:04:20,429
Simon.
885
01:04:20,431 --> 01:04:22,066
Simon, don't leave me.
886
01:04:22,433 --> 01:04:24,068
Updating.
887
01:04:24,435 --> 01:04:25,433
Updating.
888
01:04:25,435 --> 01:04:26,400
Updating.
889
01:04:26,402 --> 01:04:27,402
Updating.
890
01:04:27,404 --> 01:04:28,170
Updating.
891
01:04:28,172 --> 01:04:29,106
Updating.
892
01:04:29,473 --> 01:04:30,205
Updating.
893
01:04:30,207 --> 01:04:31,105
Updating.
894
01:04:31,107 --> 01:04:31,739
OK.
895
01:04:31,741 --> 01:04:32,140
OK.
896
01:04:32,142 --> 01:04:32,774
OK.
897
01:04:32,776 --> 01:04:33,708
I'm freaking out.
898
01:04:33,710 --> 01:04:34,208
I'm done.
899
01:04:34,210 --> 01:04:34,908
I'm done.
900
01:04:34,910 --> 01:04:35,475
Why is she so psycho?
901
01:04:35,477 --> 01:04:36,643
I don't know.
902
01:04:36,645 --> 01:04:41,084
Everything has been
great, like really great.
903
01:04:41,852 --> 01:04:45,089
All day yesterday was
awesome, you know?
904
01:04:45,721 --> 01:04:47,591
Wait, did you bang that thing?
905
01:04:48,392 --> 01:04:50,727
It's not a thing, it's a girl.
906
01:04:51,395 --> 01:04:54,532
And yes, like a lot.
907
01:04:55,098 --> 01:04:55,966
Nice, man.
908
01:05:27,797 --> 01:05:33,335
What?
909
01:05:56,826 --> 01:05:58,194
Oh, OK.
910
01:05:58,794 --> 01:06:00,228
What are we supposed to do?
911
01:06:00,230 --> 01:06:01,532
Kill her?
912
01:06:01,797 --> 01:06:02,799
No.
913
01:06:03,299 --> 01:06:04,299
No, man.
914
01:06:04,301 --> 01:06:06,103
I'm going to fix her.
915
01:06:06,602 --> 01:06:07,805
I just need my laptop.
916
01:06:08,305 --> 01:06:09,272
Geez.
917
01:06:09,772 --> 01:06:10,772
Updating.
918
01:06:10,774 --> 01:06:11,709
Updating.
919
01:06:35,265 --> 01:06:36,198
God damnit, not again.
920
01:06:36,200 --> 01:06:37,199
Updating.
921
01:06:37,201 --> 01:06:47,208
Updating.
922
01:06:52,815 --> 01:06:54,852
Why is everyone laughing?
923
01:06:58,488 --> 01:06:59,857
Maybe because of that.
924
01:07:06,495 --> 01:07:07,363
That's it.
925
01:07:14,770 --> 01:07:16,640
I thought that would
be more dramatic.
926
01:07:16,939 --> 01:07:17,437
Yeah.
927
01:07:17,439 --> 01:07:18,642
Updating.
928
01:07:19,009 --> 01:07:19,777
Updating.
929
01:07:20,343 --> 01:07:25,946
Updating.
930
01:07:25,948 --> 01:07:30,417
Bash?
931
01:07:30,419 --> 01:07:35,690
Bash?
932
01:07:35,692 --> 01:07:38,161
Well well, If it isn't
Casanova himself.
933
01:07:38,629 --> 01:07:39,830
Give me my laptop.
934
01:07:40,663 --> 01:07:41,763
Yeah, give him his laptop, dude.
935
01:07:41,765 --> 01:07:44,401
What are you going to
do if I don't, Vag?
936
01:07:45,301 --> 01:07:46,533
Man, you don't understand.
937
01:07:46,535 --> 01:07:48,271
I need that laptop.
938
01:07:48,705 --> 01:07:51,342
Well, come get it.
939
01:07:55,879 --> 01:07:56,678
Fuck it.
940
01:07:56,680 --> 01:07:59,250
We don't have time for this.
941
01:08:04,353 --> 01:08:05,156
Simon?
942
01:08:06,256 --> 01:08:08,658
I'm not mad, sweetie,
I just want to talk.
943
01:08:09,326 --> 01:08:10,694
Hey baby, what's up?
944
01:08:17,300 --> 01:08:20,668
You.
945
01:08:20,670 --> 01:08:22,070
What do you want, bitch?
946
01:08:22,072 --> 01:08:25,209
You're the tramp that wrecked
my best friend's relationship.
947
01:08:25,642 --> 01:08:26,644
Whatever, slut.
948
01:08:29,612 --> 01:08:30,647
Aw, cat fight.
949
01:08:49,065 --> 01:08:50,300
Oh, oh, oh!
950
01:08:50,567 --> 01:08:52,736
Oh!
951
01:08:53,069 --> 01:09:06,448
Oh Peg.
952
01:09:06,450 --> 01:09:09,220
I told I'd go balls deep
in your girlfriend tonight.
953
01:09:14,558 --> 01:09:15,123
Updating.
954
01:09:15,125 --> 01:09:16,357
Updating.
955
01:09:16,359 --> 01:09:17,228
Updating.
956
01:09:17,560 --> 01:09:18,392
Updating.
957
01:09:18,394 --> 01:09:18,892
No fucking way.
958
01:09:18,894 --> 01:09:19,761
Updating.
959
01:09:19,763 --> 01:09:20,494
Updating.
960
01:09:20,496 --> 01:09:21,061
Peg.
961
01:09:21,063 --> 01:09:21,798
Updating.
962
01:09:22,131 --> 01:09:23,933
Oh, Peg.
963
01:09:24,768 --> 01:09:28,738
That was so... that was so sweet.
964
01:09:29,538 --> 01:09:31,407
I can't believe you did that.
965
01:09:31,742 --> 01:09:32,673
Desiree?
966
01:09:32,675 --> 01:09:34,911
Is that you?
967
01:09:35,511 --> 01:09:36,412
It's so dark.
968
01:09:36,813 --> 01:09:37,779
It's so cold.
969
01:09:37,781 --> 01:09:39,380
Let me try to get
the bottle out.
970
01:09:39,382 --> 01:09:40,015
Oh God, no.
971
01:09:40,017 --> 01:09:40,582
No, that's tender.
972
01:09:40,584 --> 01:09:41,316
That's tender.
973
01:09:41,318 --> 01:09:42,618
It's just your shoulder.
974
01:09:42,620 --> 01:09:44,785
I'm pretty sure if you clean
up the wound it'll be OK.
975
01:09:44,787 --> 01:09:46,654
Oh, I didn't know
you were a doctor.
976
01:09:46,656 --> 01:09:48,259
Go away please.
977
01:09:48,858 --> 01:09:50,393
Desiree, don't listen to her.
978
01:09:50,794 --> 01:09:52,127
She's crazy.
979
01:09:52,129 --> 01:09:53,430
She's not a doctor.
980
01:10:03,840 --> 01:10:05,005
Give me my laptop.
981
01:10:05,007 --> 01:10:06,510
Updating.
982
01:10:07,010 --> 01:10:07,508
Updating.
983
01:10:07,510 --> 01:10:08,779
Updating.
984
01:10:09,112 --> 01:10:09,712
Updating.
985
01:10:10,647 --> 01:10:12,045
I don't need it anyway.
986
01:10:12,047 --> 01:10:13,517
Updating.
987
01:10:14,017 --> 01:10:14,781
Updating.
988
01:10:14,783 --> 01:10:15,816
Bash, what have you done?
989
01:10:15,818 --> 01:10:16,685
Updating.
990
01:10:16,687 --> 01:10:18,852
You're so much hotter in person.
991
01:10:18,854 --> 01:10:20,823
This is why she's
been acting so crazy.
992
01:10:21,957 --> 01:10:27,363
Her strength, her emotion,
her sex drive, seriously?
993
01:10:27,964 --> 01:10:29,196
These are all way too high.
994
01:10:29,198 --> 01:10:30,033
Updating.
995
01:10:30,567 --> 01:10:31,699
Updating.
996
01:10:31,701 --> 01:10:34,067
Oh shit, you changed
her relationship status?
997
01:10:34,069 --> 01:10:37,540
It's just one more thing you're
going to lose to me, Vag.
998
01:10:38,474 --> 01:10:39,807
Bash, you don't understand.
999
01:10:39,809 --> 01:10:41,812
If she's in a
relationship with you...
1000
01:10:48,050 --> 01:10:50,586
Oh, you are intense, baby.
1001
01:10:51,220 --> 01:10:54,325
Don't use that word.
1002
01:10:54,825 --> 01:10:56,327
I'm so sorry, baby.
1003
01:10:56,827 --> 01:10:57,991
I was just kidding.
1004
01:10:57,993 --> 01:10:58,793
I didn't mean it.
1005
01:10:58,795 --> 01:10:59,459
Simon, this bitch is crazy.
1006
01:10:59,461 --> 01:11:01,799
I just want to talk.
1007
01:11:02,465 --> 01:11:03,464
Where are you going?
1008
01:11:03,466 --> 01:11:04,367
What are you doing?
1009
01:11:32,761 --> 01:11:33,897
Oh shit.
1010
01:11:35,130 --> 01:11:39,502
Well, I did not see this
evening taking this turn.
1011
01:11:39,903 --> 01:11:42,406
What do we do?
1012
01:11:42,872 --> 01:11:43,737
Do we call 9-1-1?
1013
01:11:43,739 --> 01:11:44,539
No.
1014
01:11:44,541 --> 01:11:45,339
Hell no.
1015
01:11:45,341 --> 01:11:46,441
We're not going to do that.
1016
01:11:46,443 --> 01:11:47,275
We're going to do what
teenagers always do
1017
01:11:47,277 --> 01:11:49,947
in a situation like this, run.
1018
01:11:58,854 --> 01:12:01,524
That's my house.
1019
01:12:02,125 --> 01:12:03,790
So, what happened back there?
1020
01:12:03,792 --> 01:12:04,928
Who is that lady?
1021
01:12:05,795 --> 01:12:08,165
Honestly, it's a
long, long story.
1022
01:12:12,269 --> 01:12:13,137
Tell me later?
1023
01:12:30,086 --> 01:12:32,619
OK guys, so the next
project that we're
1024
01:12:32,621 --> 01:12:36,559
going to be working on this
year, it's called Stan's Face.
1025
01:12:37,661 --> 01:12:40,697
Yes, yes, I know you guys
are all very excited.
1026
01:12:41,864 --> 01:12:44,201
The basic premises, I
wake up every morning
1027
01:12:45,100 --> 01:12:49,439
and take a new
picture of my face.
1028
01:12:52,809 --> 01:12:54,578
Dude, that chick was so hot.
1029
01:12:55,245 --> 01:12:56,977
You and Simon with
college chicks?
1030
01:12:56,979 --> 01:12:57,744
Epic, bro.
1031
01:12:57,746 --> 01:13:00,917
Dude, are you kidding me?
1032
01:13:03,853 --> 01:13:06,089
That's called evidence, son.
1033
01:13:06,355 --> 01:13:07,925
Hey.
1034
01:13:08,692 --> 01:13:10,624
How's your shoulder, baby?
1035
01:13:10,626 --> 01:13:12,860
You know how I feel about
that word, sweet heart.
1036
01:13:28,144 --> 01:13:29,680
How you doing Simon?
1037
01:13:33,817 --> 01:13:34,649
College girl?
1038
01:13:34,651 --> 01:13:39,786
Nice bro.
1039
01:13:39,788 --> 01:13:40,657
Genius, right?
1040
01:13:47,831 --> 01:13:50,501
Simon, what are you doing here?
1041
01:13:51,635 --> 01:13:55,639
Better question is, what
are you doing in my seat?
1042
01:13:56,105 --> 01:13:57,105
Don't look at me.
1043
01:13:57,107 --> 01:13:59,510
Get out of the man's seat.
1044
01:13:59,776 --> 01:14:07,080
Oh.
1045
01:14:07,082 --> 01:14:09,252
Celia, care to do that honors?
1046
01:14:10,386 --> 01:14:13,087
Since Stanley has stepped
down as intern president,
1047
01:14:13,089 --> 01:14:15,692
I would like to nominate
Simon for president of FMSDA.
1048
01:14:16,126 --> 01:14:17,661
Who will second?
1049
01:14:21,764 --> 01:14:23,099
Great.
1050
01:14:23,767 --> 01:14:24,999
Let's get started.
1051
01:14:25,001 --> 01:14:29,639
I've been working on this
really awesome program.
1052
01:14:37,080 --> 01:14:41,084
Scene 70, take one, marker.
1053
01:14:48,724 --> 01:14:51,027
All right, you ready?
1054
01:14:51,760 --> 01:14:53,196
Ready over there, Tony?
1055
01:14:53,729 --> 01:14:54,697
All right.
1056
01:14:55,064 --> 01:14:56,098
And action.
1057
01:15:01,705 --> 01:15:03,774
I forgot my line.
1058
01:15:04,373 --> 01:15:05,742
Oh shit, we're doing a line?
1059
01:15:06,041 --> 01:15:06,776
Sorry.
1060
01:15:07,042 --> 01:15:07,808
Cut.
1061
01:15:07,810 --> 01:15:09,779
I'm sorry.
1062
01:15:10,380 --> 01:15:13,750
Greetings, blah, blah, blah.
1063
01:15:14,050 --> 01:15:15,619
Sorry.
1064
01:15:16,019 --> 01:15:17,154
You're gross.
1065
01:15:22,725 --> 01:15:25,696
OK guys...
1066
01:15:27,229 --> 01:15:31,367
Full disclosure, think
about... blah, blah, blah.
1067
01:15:34,370 --> 01:15:35,839
OK, what I just said was a lie.
1068
01:15:36,505 --> 01:15:37,740
But that's not... Shit.
1069
01:15:38,006 --> 01:15:39,609
OK.
1070
01:15:40,343 --> 01:15:42,278
OK, the thing I
just said was a lie.
1071
01:15:43,011 --> 01:15:44,747
About Bash not... shit.
1072
01:15:45,014 --> 01:15:46,112
OK.
1073
01:15:46,114 --> 01:15:46,780
About me not caring
what Bash does to me.
1074
01:15:46,782 --> 01:15:47,414
All right, I got it.
1075
01:15:47,416 --> 01:15:48,615
Blah, blah, blah.
1076
01:15:48,617 --> 01:15:50,884
You can bet your ass I'm
going to tell everybody
1077
01:15:50,886 --> 01:15:57,024
that they did.
1078
01:15:57,026 --> 01:15:59,261
Because she has to
remove it, right?
1079
01:15:59,528 --> 01:15:59,927
No.
1080
01:15:59,929 --> 01:16:00,962
No?
1081
01:16:00,964 --> 01:16:03,364
No she does not
have to [inaudible]...
1082
01:16:03,366 --> 01:16:04,231
Oh, so it doesn't matter...
1083
01:16:04,233 --> 01:16:08,638
We're not making a pornography.
1084
01:16:09,205 --> 01:16:13,276
Contrary to popular belief.
1085
01:16:21,050 --> 01:16:25,689
We're going to get real weird
with this one, all right?
1086
01:16:26,488 --> 01:16:28,890
Wait until I get off
on the idea that she's
1087
01:16:28,892 --> 01:16:30,760
going to be the first one...
1088
01:16:34,997 --> 01:16:37,166
I totally get off on the idea
of the first girl... oh my God.
1089
01:16:38,201 --> 01:16:41,805
I totally get off on
the idea of... oh my God.
1090
01:16:42,171 --> 01:16:45,142
Oh my God.
1091
01:16:45,875 --> 01:16:48,845
Oh man I almost had it.
1092
01:16:49,144 --> 01:16:50,143
Shit.
1093
01:16:50,145 --> 01:16:52,180
Why is this line so hard?
1094
01:17:00,122 --> 01:17:02,858
What are we doing right now?
1095
01:17:03,459 --> 01:17:06,462
Scene A71, Frank, take one.
1096
01:17:10,433 --> 01:17:13,970
I just lost my thing-inity.
1097
01:17:14,571 --> 01:17:15,805
Whatever that is.
1098
01:17:16,104 --> 01:17:17,707
Slate.
1099
01:17:18,107 --> 01:17:19,242
Slate-inity.
1100
01:17:27,082 --> 01:17:28,415
Who's my little buddy?
1101
01:17:28,417 --> 01:17:29,986
You know what we're going to do?
1102
01:17:31,054 --> 01:17:33,087
You're going to
type the buttons,
1103
01:17:33,089 --> 01:17:34,254
you're going to make it happen...
1104
01:17:39,528 --> 01:17:41,027
It is your will.
1105
01:17:41,029 --> 01:17:44,434
It is God's work
that you do this.
1106
01:17:45,068 --> 01:17:46,436
It is your fate.
1107
01:17:47,002 --> 01:17:48,035
Do you see?
1108
01:17:48,037 --> 01:17:49,740
The computer tells you.
1109
01:17:50,340 --> 01:17:53,443
It is if it is speaking to us.
1110
01:17:56,479 --> 01:18:00,313
OK.
1111
01:18:02,585 --> 01:18:04,421
I was actually going
to say I was thinking
1112
01:18:05,188 --> 01:18:06,286
about a different direction.
1113
01:18:06,288 --> 01:18:08,021
I was thinking about that.
1114
01:18:08,023 --> 01:18:10,024
After he leaves,
I go over there.
1115
01:18:10,026 --> 01:18:11,292
I start making out with Stanley.
1116
01:18:11,294 --> 01:18:12,496
Oh my God.
1117
01:18:13,263 --> 01:18:14,294
Why is everyone laughing?
1118
01:18:14,296 --> 01:18:15,495
That was stupid.
1119
01:18:15,497 --> 01:18:17,164
Why is everyone laughing?
1120
01:18:17,166 --> 01:18:18,365
All right, so...
1121
01:18:18,367 --> 01:18:19,769
No one's laughing.
1122
01:18:20,435 --> 01:18:23,005
Take 32, [inaudible],
take three.
1123
01:18:29,946 --> 01:18:30,913
The clacking things.
1124
01:18:38,955 --> 01:18:40,023
57 Charlie, take one.
1125
01:18:40,924 --> 01:18:41,892
That's a lot of Charlie's.
1126
01:18:42,925 --> 01:18:45,895
That's 57 Charlie
all over the place.
1127
01:18:49,998 --> 01:18:51,033
Oh fuck, dude.
1128
01:18:51,466 --> 01:18:54,004
No.
1129
01:18:54,336 --> 01:18:55,335
Acting.
1130
01:18:55,337 --> 01:18:56,273
No, OK.
1131
01:18:56,939 --> 01:18:59,475
42 Dallas, take one.
1132
01:19:00,276 --> 01:19:01,478
It should always be dollars.
1133
01:19:02,245 --> 01:19:03,945
Dollars, dollars, dollars.
1134
01:19:03,947 --> 01:19:05,448
Dollar bills, y'all.
1135
01:19:06,215 --> 01:19:07,548
Everything is about Stanley.
1136
01:19:07,550 --> 01:19:09,482
Everything is about Stanley.
1137
01:19:09,484 --> 01:19:13,823
Stanley is starring
in his own movie.
1138
01:19:17,193 --> 01:19:18,191
Oh, right, right.
1139
01:19:21,965 --> 01:19:27,267
I got caught up being
popular and being...
1140
01:19:27,269 --> 01:19:29,371
it totally fell.
1141
01:19:31,373 --> 01:19:32,843
And...
1142
01:19:35,745 --> 01:19:42,318
Head to scene 68,
your anus, take one.
1143
01:19:42,684 --> 01:19:43,285
And action.
1144
01:19:43,752 --> 01:19:44,985
Wait, what are we doing?
1145
01:19:44,987 --> 01:19:46,255
What are we doing?
1146
01:20:05,544 --> 01:20:10,544
Subtitles by explosiveskull
73855
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.