Original subtitles

- Previously on "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills"...

- Happy birthday!

- Yay! - What?

[laughter]

- Do you want to be on my show?

- F... yeah, I wanna be on your show!

Are you serious? - Awesome.

- Who the f... Gets this kind of gift?

- This is Dorit.

- So beautiful. - Oh, thank you.

So are you. Hi, how are you? - Hi. Nice to meet you.

- Nice to meet you.

I've heard so much about you from Boy George.

- What a dump.

- My husband is a talent manager,

and he manages Boy George.

- My mom, she was actually saying that

she felt the same as she did when she was 21 inside.

- I know, but what no one knew was that you lost your mom

over the reunion. - I know.

- I think the whole thing with Yolanda

sort of tainted our friendship.

It was almost like we were divided up into three groups.

It was very strange.

- How she reacts, it's her thing.

That's not our problem.

When my dad died,

it just changed my outlook on every single thing.

I don't have time for a whole lot of bullsh... right now.

- Lisa Rinna and Lisa Vanderpump,

I'm sure they're gonna be okay eventually, don't you think?

[upbeat music]

- The crown is heavy, darling.

So just leave it where it belongs.

♪ ♪

- I may be two people,

but I'm not two-faced.

♪ ♪

- My advice to you:

don't hustle the hustler.

♪ ♪

- I speak no evil

but I see and hear everything.

♪ ♪

- When you've traveled the world,

you can speak in any accent you want.

♪ ♪

- I'm an expert on luxury

and I can always spot a fake.

♪ ♪

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

[engine revs]

♪ ♪

- I can't even imagine how much this car costs.

- I don't like to think about it actually.

- I know.

- Obviously, Mauricio bought this car for him.

He goes, "It's for us." I'm like, "For both of us?"

I'm like, "Mm-hmm, let's see who's gonna be driving it."

Hilarious.

I do love a sports car, I'm not gonna lie.

- I love that.

Oh, my God, this car is unreal.

- It's pretty crazy, right?

- Wow.

If Harry brought a Lamborghini home for the two of us,

I would probably think that

aliens had come and taken over his body,

because he's a cheap mother... er.

- I look really tired from Erika's party.

- Okay. - My eyes, not good.

- I don't... I can't even take my glasses off.

I look like a haggard mess.

I am so... - We went and got, like,

cheeseburgers and french fries.

- Wanna get up and dance?

- No, I'm actually hungry.

- I'm starving.

- You did? - Yeah, last night.

- I'm so jealous. - You should have seen all of us

with our outfits in there ordering cheeseburgers...

- Okay. - Fries, shakes.

- Which one... which one did you order, baby?

- The one without onions.

- Dorit was making fun of me because... [laughs]

I thought I could call ahead to...

To order the hamburgers and french fries.

- It's so funny, because I went to put her name in my phone

and it came out Doritos.

- [laughs] - I'm not even kidding.

My phone autocorrected it to Doritos.

[laughter]

[crunches]

- And you haven't seen Vanderpump at all?

- Just last night. - Not before then?

You haven't bumped into her, like...

- No.

- I mean, I bump into you all the time.

- I know. How weird is that,

we live in a three-mile zone, you know,

and that we don't run into each other?

- Right.

- So no, the first time was last night.

[upbeat techno music]

♪ ♪

- [laughs]

Good boy.

♪ ♪

- It looks fit.

- When I was in my 20s,

Ken bought me a horse for my birthday,

and he brought it into the house, into the hallway,

in the middle of my birthday party.

And I've had a love of horses ever since.

Okay, you're gonna be a good boy, okay?

And you're gonna do what we say, aren't you?

I was fortunate enough to be invited to the opening

of the Cavalia show,

which is like a Cirque du Soleil for horses.

Oh, it's just so beautiful.

This show is so extraordinary.

It really is.

And I asked them if ever they would retire a horse.

And they said, actually, we have this very handsome boy

coming up for retirement very soon.

And I said, "Could I have him?"

Oh, his winky's out. Look at.

Put that back in.

We don't have that kind of relationship.

You put it back.

We're just at first base. Put it back.

I'm not riding anything else,

might as well get a horse, right?

- Did you enjoy that?

- I did. I really love riding him.

Say hello to the big dog.

Yeah, that's enough.

I used to have 15 horses when we lived in England

and the children were growing up.

Now, I just have the two little minis.

And Prince has come into my life.

You're such a kind boy.

I mean, he really is.

He's just so reliable.

- I know.

- If you ask me, honestly, do I prefer animals to people,

there's no contest.

All day long.

I think animals are more loyal than friends sometimes.

Talking about good-natured and reliable,

what did you think of last night?

- I enjoyed the party.

- You missed it, what I said to Rinna.

She came up and I was with Dorit

and she said, "Oh, I'm sure you've influenced Dorit."

So I said, "No, why would I do that?"

- Don't listen to her too much.

She might fill you with...

- No, she doesn't.

- That's not true,

but I might give her a hint, if you catch my meaning.

- All right.

- And then she said something, "I have a heart!"

And I said I just haven't seen it lately, Lisa.

- I think that we were so divided...

- Yeah. - And everybody got on one thing

and wouldn't get off of it. - Yep.

- And as I was saying to Eileen, you know,

once you lose a parent or once you lose somebody close to you,

for me, just everything changed.

My perspective, it was like, you know what?

Life's too short.

You have to accept somebody for who they are

and get on with it.

You can get over it, you can.

- Time. It just takes time.

- It just takes time.

- If Vanderpump is going to forgive Rinna,

then she has to forgive Eileen.

You either forgive them both

or you hold onto a grudge with both.

But it wouldn't make sense if she forgives one,

not the other.

- Dorit seemed to have fun.

- Dorit was having a good time there last night.

- It would have been very easy for me to say,

"Dorit, come here.

"Let me tell you what awful, silly cows they were

and how vicious they were."

I'd liked to have done it,

but I didn't.

Probably should have.

I know one thing for sure

is that whatever trash talk they talk about me,

she won't listen to it.

We've known too many friends in common for too many years.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Yeah, but tell me how you found these places.

I've been here for two years... - I Google...

- And I cannot find any... - I Googled it.

♪ ♪

- We went to this Persian store....

- Yeah.

- And he had this,

and she went to the bakery in West Hollywood.

It's a pretty Jewish area.

- Neighborhood. - Neighborhood.

And they have everything. It's awesome.

- My parents, I don't see them as much as I'd like.

They live in Connecticut.

I wish my mom and dad were closer.

Now that I found this store,

I can convince you guys to stay longer.

'Cause these are the types of things I can't find,

which make you guys want to go home.

When we are in Beverly Hills and we're not traveling,

I would say that I stay within a five-mile radius.

- Give Daddy some.

- I get stuck in the Beverly Hills bubble.

I'm very excited you're here for tomorrow's party.

You know full well that I know nothing.

So I can only expect that you're gonna be

as surprised as I am.

I am about to turn 40,

and my husband tells me

he wants to make this party for me,

and he wants to do it entirely on his own.

He doesn't want me to know any details.

- You know the secret?

- He doesn't want you to have secrets from Mommy.

PK is not very good at detail,

and that's kind of where I come in,

'cause I'm exceptional at it.

There's no one in the world you can trust more than your wife.

If I tell you I'm not interested

and I'm not trying to find out, I'm not.

But make sure, up the stairs, the candles and the flowers.

That's really important. - Yeah, yeah, okay. Okay.

- Don't have to tell you about the lighting. You know that.

- Yeah. - The entrance and so on.

- Yeah.

- It's driving me crazy until I know that it's been done

exactly the way I want it done.

PK, I'm so afraid, because there's so much stuff going on

that someone is going to say something

and I'm gonna walk in.

I'm not gonna realize that I don't know it.

- Okay, what you don't understand is

when I do things, they're done to precision.

So there's such a limited amount of people

who actually know what I'm doing,

that the people you're ever gonna meet don't even know.

- Oh. - They're not in the loop.

- I'm starting to have some indication

that PK might be buying me a car for my birthday.

- Throwing something out there in the orbit,

Tiffany blue.

- No. Absolutely... Absolutely no.

- Okay.

- That color, really, in my opinion,

shouldn't be on anything other than a box

with something really pretty inside.

If he buys me a new car

and now he's on to potentially a Tiffany blue Maserati...

- What?

- If I saw that come up the driveway,

I couldn't fake a smile.

- Stay there.

Line. Stay.

- PK, do you have a surprise for me?

- I do have a little surprise for you. Stay there.

- Honey, where exactly is the line?

What if I put a little toe over the line?

- Stay there.

- What is going on in this house?

- Honey, come down. I want you to meet someone.

Come down, bubba.

- Who, baby?

- He's come all the way from Tombouctou.

- What are you talking about?

[gasps]

Oh, my God.

- Coming up...

- Five, six,

five, six, seven, eight.

- ♪ 'Cause we don't give a f... ♪

- Hey! [laughter]

[upbeat music]

- What are you talking about? [gasps]

Oh, my God.

- Happy birthday, baby.

- No. No, PK.

- [laughs]

- No. - Happy birthday, love.

- No, bubba, no.

- I was thinking,

what's reflective of Dorit's personality?

And I thought rose-tinted gold.

- [gasps]

- Rachel, what do you think?

- Oh, my God.

- I'm speechless.

- You are the best husband in the world.

- Thank you.

- Oh, my God, Papa. - Come on, bub, get inside.

- You can basically count on a yes

for anything you ask me for your lifetime.

- Anything? - Oh, my God!

No! [laughs]

It's so special. It's so over the top.

- Mum-in-law, sit down.

- Oh, my God.

It's so incredibly thoughtful.

I think I'm the luckiest girl in the world.

- I can't even... - Honey, you're good.

You're good to go. Just keep going.

Turn more... - Oh, my God!

I love this car! - Turn more to the right.

- It is to the right. - No, just keep going.

Don't turn the wheel.

Now, turn more to the right, babe.

All right, straighten up.

You're good.

- I love you!

- Oh, I love you, babe.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- That was fun.

A nice little ride on the roller coaster.

- Yeah.

- You're gonna love this.

Hi, honey. - Hi.

- You beat us.

- Hi, welcome to LIT Method.

- This is my daughter, Alexia. Did you know that?

- Hi, nice to meet you.

- Alexia is going to school in Boston.

Arizona was just not the right fit for Alexia.

You're gonna have so much fun. [cries]

- Okay. I love you.

Now that she's home, I am making a point

to spend as much time with her as possible

before she leaves to go back to Boston.

Alexia, Lisa is gonna be in New York

when Sophia and I go next week....

- Ooh. - With her two girls.

- We're gonna be in New York, while Kyle's in New York.

- All right, so, everyone, all eyes on me real quick.

When you grab this handle,

I want you to drive with your legs,

engage your core,

pull with your arms, okay?

- This is the newest thing.

- Okay, I'm doing the newest thing.

- I live in a town where everybody looks

unbelievably good.

You would never know how many kids they have

or how old they are.

They're all freaks of nature.

- Yes, everyone is looking good.

All right, everyone, keep your eyes on me.

Nice, easy side-to-side strokes.

- Oh, my God, I'm gonna be sore. I can already tell.

In my 20s and in my 30s

I did everything first.

And now, as I've grown more mature,

I'm not as desperate.

Even though it might seem like I am, I'm not.

- Five... - Oh!

- Four, three,

two, finished.

- Whoo!

- Yeah! - Whoo!

- All right, everyone crushed it.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Perfect.

You're like the bang whisperer.

- [laughs]

♪ ♪

- Thank you. - You're welcome.

- Oh, hey, how are you?

- I'm good. How are you?

- These are super painful. We should probably retire them.

- Okay.

- "The Young and the Restless" is celebrating

its 11,000th episode.

I mean, that's just so epic and huge.

- We're rolling.

- Oh, boy.

- Take me back, if you will, to the very beginning.

- They're doing interviews with all the cast

about their favorite moments on the show.

- You're 22 and suddenly you're here

at "The Young and the Restless."

Those early days of Ashley, what was she like?

- Ashley had just gotten back from college.

That was my first scene was with Jerry Douglas,

who played my father.

And my first scenes were in cowboy boots and jeans

Why didn't you tell me you were coming so early?

I would have gotten dressed up.

- Oh, really, and spoil your hip image?

- Oh, this is not hip.

- Oh, casual, chic. - Hardly.

I think Ashley is all too human.

I have forgotten most of these things,

so I'm taking this magnificent walk down memory lane,

going all the way back to 1982.

- We're talking favorite moments,

'cause we're celebrating 11,000 shows.

I know you have one from those early days.

- My character had an abortion

in, I think, the early to mid-'80s.

Do you think it was...

easy for me or something?

It was the hardest decision I've ever made.

This character was intelligent

and smart and had so much money,

but she was fallible.

And she still is.

If I could write my own story arc,

I want to do an Erika Jayne story where I'm like...

Ashley Abbott's going off across the country

and performs at gay clubs.

There, that's my story.

That was easy.

- You're a champ. - Nice.

- Of course it is.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Five, six, seven.

- Let's see what these hos are up to.

- Let me tell you about the video.

The song is called "Expensive"

and it's a full '80s, full fantasy, like, blowout.

I want to put, like, a group of, like,

really bombshell bitches together, okay?

Well, hello.

[laughs] [cheers and applause]

- So we just finished teaching, so it's perfect timing.

Okay, so let's do redheads first.

So Taylor, Kim, and Alex.

- This is my tenth video.

That sounds kind of crazy, but it's really true.

♪ I'm a princess ♪

♪ Princess, princess, princess ♪

♪ I'm a pretty mess ♪

♪ Pretty mess, pretty mess ♪

♪ Like a painkiller, killer ♪

♪ Like a painkiller ♪

♪ How many f... s do I give? ♪

♪ None ♪

♪ Not one ♪

♪ Zero, zero, zero done ♪

This is a fun song.

It's super sassy, super Erika Jayne.

I mean, that's really what "Expensive" means,

and that's really what this song is about,

and that's really what the video is about.

I'm not singing ballads.

- Here we go.

[upbeat music]

Five, six,

five, six, seven, eight.

♪ ♪

- ♪ Expensive ♪

♪ 'Cause we don't give a f... ♪

- Hey!

[laughter]

- When I audition dancers, I'm looking for two things.

Can you nail the steps,

and are you sexy?

I approach things in a... Kind of an in-your-face way.

My dancers have to do the same.

- I do have to say this is very difficult.

Now you all have to leave so we can sit here and talk about you.

[laughter]

- But you're used to that. - Yeah.

- Thank you all for coming out.

And I know it's hard, and I know you're sweating,

and I appreciate you going with the program.

So thank you.

Together: Thank you.

- Wow. Thank you, girls.

[applause]

- The truth is this.

There's only a certain amount of dancers that work all the time.

So if they're not with Katy Perry

or they're not with Rihanna, or they're not...

You know, there's only... It's a small group.

So those people are the ones you're usually after.

This girl performed her ass off. Well, she... well, she performed.

- Yeah. - She did.

- And she served it hard. - And she's like...

- She's got... - Fleshy.

- She's got muscles. - Right.

- She's fleshy. This one's out because she's too small.

I've been giving "shows"

since I was three years old

in my family's, like, living room.

This is, like, everything that you've dreamed of

right here and now.

- Booty, booty, booty, booty,

small booty.

- Okay, well, I have... - Do you know what I mean?

- A big ass. - If I were to get rid

of someone, I would get rid of her,

and I would do two brunettes and two blondes.

- This is a nasty crew right here.

- Okay, so we will do this,

and our work is done for today here.

- Yay. - So what I'm gonna do is

I'm gonna call the agents,

let them know about our choices. - Let 'em know who got the job.

And then we're gonna meet with Dani Michelle

and the styling team

to go over all of the looks for the video.

- Are we gonna wear bathing suits for this?

Are you sticking me in a bathing suit and heels?

- We're gonna find the right bathing suit

and the right heels or boots.

[laughter]

- I mean, in my head... - No, no, no.

I get it. I'm not... - I feel like it's superhot...

- I'm not arguing. - You know?

- I'm just saying, sh...

- I mean, it wouldn't be the first time

you danced in something skimpy and, you know.

- No, but it will be the first time I hit a split...

- It's your jeuje. - In a bikini.

[laughter]

Probably won't be able to walk for, like, a week or two,

but it'll be okay.

And I... and I still feel f... ing bad.

- Wah! [laughter]

- It's amazing. All right, I'll see you guys later.

- Coming up...

- Where does one even find something like that?

- Where does one find something like that?

- I'm not telling you.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Okay, so what are you making us?

- Zucchini pasta.

Delilah will not eat it, but...

♪ ♪

I'd rather have regular pasta.

You gotta break it up a little.

Can you get a big pan?

- Please. - Please.

- I am raising two teenagers.

I will always see them as babies and little girls,

and yet, all of a sudden, they are growing up too fast.

- Does this make you comfortable?

[laughter]

- Or not.

- There's seeds now.

- Oh, that looks good.

- Yeah, that's all you know how to do.

- [laughs]

That's my kind of cooking.

My mother was a cook.

But my mother, God love her,

was not a great cook.

Very good, you guys.

- Well, this is what happens

when you've gotta make your own food.

- I think the only thing you've ever cooked me

is macaroni and cheese.

- My mom was big on casseroles with potato chips on top,

every TV dinner known to man,

and Jell-O for my salad.

So you can't do this?

- No, no!

[gasps]

- Oh, God.

- No, Mom, you're breaking it.

- I can't say that I ever learned how to cook.

I love my mom, but I can't say that she said,

"Hey, come here and let me teach you how to make some Spam."

[laughs]

That is very good, Amelia.

- The cheese looks so good. - Mm.

- Oh, thank you.

- And I don't want that much cheese.

- It really gets nice and creamy.

- Oh, I like it.

Okay, listen.

So you need to walk,

and you need to send a video in of you walking...

- Mm.

- For fashion shows in September.

Delilah is going to New York.

She is going on castings and she's meeting photographers,

and it's really exciting.

What did Cindy Crawford tell you?

She said...

- Some pictures you're not gonna...

- Some pictures you're not gonna love.

- She said some pictures are ugly.

- And you're just gonna have to deal with it.

- I'm really tired of this conversation.

- Why, because it's not about you?

You know, I want Delilah to have her moment,

and this is typical Amelia teenage behavior.

But I also am aware enough

that I don't want her to feel

like we're not paying attention to her.

I wouldn't let Delilah do it till she was 17.

- No, you didn't. - I'm letting you do it at 15.

So, hi. Props to that.

- Probably 'cause I was really ugly when I was 15.

- You were not really ugly at 15.

- [laughs] - I was too.

- I was really ugly at 15.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- I trust Dorit not to look,

but I think we want to black the doors out.

- We're gonna black all four doors out.

- Yeah, black all four doors out so she can't see,

and we should black those doors out as well.

♪ ♪

- Oh. - Breathe.

- I've got this new weird little...

It's like a twitch almost.

When I get heated or I'm nervous...

- Yeah. - Or...

My nose starts to run.

- That's fun. - It's such an unpretty look.

When you're not hands-on,

something that you ordinarily would be,

there's always a little bit of anxiety that comes with it.

I don't want you to play with it too much, Charles.

- I'm just getting this... - 'Cause you know what happens

when you play with it too much, it just gets like...

- Overdone. - Yeah, so...

- I'm just getting that little bend there.

- Because this now... This doesn't look right.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Whoop. Okay.

♪ ♪

Oh.

A golf cart at a party is not an unusual situation.

As you know, people in L.A. do not walk anywhere,

including to the front door.

Hi. Is that for me?

- Yes, it is.

- I'll just take it anyway, even if it's not.

[upbeat music]

- Hi. - Hello.

♪ ♪

This feels very sedate for a PK party.

I'm not sure

this is all there is.

Do you think I have too much butt out?

- No, you look unbelievable.

You look radiant. You look gracious.

- Thank you. - And you look really beautiful,

and you have a nice time. It's your birthday.

Jagger, what do you think, son? Yes or no?

- Yes. - What do they think?

Together: Yes!

- Hey, I heard you won yesterday.

- Yes. - Or was it today?

- Yesterday.

- And you were instrumental in scoring the goal.

- That's my job. - I mean, of course.

♪ ♪

- Welcome to your party, honey.

- Thank you.

It's so exciting.

It's a very chill vibe.

I do hope that there is something else

and it's not just us

sitting around having drinks in the living room.

[laughs] Here's hoping.

- Happy birthday. You look lovely.

Like an old movie star, darling.

- Oh, thank you. - That's what I said.

- Yeah. - Like 1920s.

- Yeah, gorgeous. - Wait, he said...

- Listen, you're an inspiration to every woman

that's 40 years old and just had a baby 4 months ago.

There must be some heavy Spanx going on there or something.

- No. - Oh, shut up.

- Oh, my God, I've never worn Spanx in my entire life.

- Shut up. - A bodysuit.

- Don't tell another woman that. - [laughs]

[upbeat music]

- Oh, this is fabulous.

I've been to a lot of parties in golf carts,

but not like this golf cart.

Like, this is a very fancy one.

These people have some money.

- Hello, hello.

- Hello. - Hi.

- So are you excited?

- I am. I am.

- So what about the other night, did you have fun?

- I did. I did. - Yeah.

- It was really nice of Erika to invite me to her party.

- Yeah. - Everyone seemed...

- And she was totally different to me, totally.

- Who was? Erika? - Yeah.

She was very warm. - Yeah.

- Thank you for coming!

- Well, thank you for inviting me.

- My God, of course! Welcome back to my home.

- Oh, yeah, but I saw that from all the women.

- I'm not sure Dorit is seeing the situation

that accurately,

because I thought Eileen Davidson

was pretty cold to me.

- Cheers. Happy birthday.

- Thank you, thank you, thank you.

- We're gonna have fun. - Yay!

- And we're gonna dance. - Yay!

- And we're gonna sing. - Yay.

- And we're gonna just, yeah, celebrate your birthday.

- Yay.

- Ooh, look at all the red.

- So pretty, huh?

- Thank you.

- Thank you very much.

- Hello. - Hi.

- Oh, yes, hi. - Hello!

- Lady in red, pretty, pretty.

- Hi, gorgeous.

- How are you? You look great.

- Thank you. Thank you, thank you.

- You look great. Look at you.

- Look at you.

- I know, everyone looks great. You look good.

You're skinny.

- No, I'm not.

- Yes, you are. - Oh, no, I'm not.

- Where does one even find something like that?

- Where does one find something like that?

- I'm not telling you...

- I know you're not. - Any of my secrets.

[dramatic music]

- Why would I even think you would?

- God only knows.

- Lisa Vanderpump sometimes is just trying to be funny

and other times she's like...

It's a joke.

- Turn around.

You look good.

- No, I'm not doing anything you ask me to do.

- You look great.

Just take the compliment. You look good. Say thank you.

- Thank you. - You're welcome.

- You should be happy.

It's a compliment, for God's sakes.

Hello. - Welcome.

- Happy birthday. - Thank you.

Thank you so much. - You look gorgeous.

What a gorgeous home.

- Thank you. Welcome to our home.

- We live very close. - Do you?

- Yes. I've never been up here. - Might not be a good thing.

- Shut up.

- It might not be a good thing. - I'm just saying.

- I'm not getting tired of Vanderpump

taking the piss out of me because, to me,

it's a step in the right direction.

It means we're communicating.

I feel that it's progress.

It could be good; it could be bad.

She's seen both ways. - Okay.

- You've seen both ways. - But that...

Doesn't that make for a real strong relationship...

- You've seen both ways. - I have, I have.

- When you see both sides?

- Tell her that. Yes, it does.

- No, I prefer one side.

- Yes!

- Well, I like the side of Rinna

when she's not calling me an evil, manipulative bitch.

For sure, that's the side I could say I prefer.

Yes.

- You okay?

- Yeah. Why wouldn't I be okay?

- I don't know.

- Just English sense of humor.

A little prod, she deserves it.

- You're gonna have a little fun with this, aren't you?

- A little bit. How can I otherwise?

I gave them the power to hurt me, and I'm taking it back.

- Lisa Vanderpump's being a little dramatic about that.

I mean, I can't see Lisa giving power to anyone

to do anything.

Is Eileen here?

- Oh, I don't know.

That actually doesn't concern me that much.

♪ ♪

- Is this it?

- Okay. Yes, it is.

♪ ♪

It seems strange, after everything that happened

between me and Lisa Vanderpump,

for it to just go away.

In the Hamptons, you said something very offensive to me.

A friend doesn't say, "Is that when the affair started?

Is that when it was?"

- Well, what's the big deal of saying...

- The big way is when you do it, own it.

Just say I'm sorry.

I'm trying to figure out how to be okay.

I know Lisa Rinna is, too.

I'm pretty sure we're not gonna have the same approach.

Hello. - Hi, Eileen.

- How are you, Lisa? You look beautiful.

- So do you.

- Thank you.

How are you?

- I'm good. I'm busy. I'm happy.

I'm surviving...

- Good.

- In a world that seems sometimes challenging.

- Yeah?

- I meant to say, um...

I'm sorry.

- Coming up...

- Can I welcome you all to Dorit's Buddha lounge?

- Oh, my God! - Oh, my God.

[upbeat music]

- Hello. - Hi, Eileen.

- How are you, Lisa? You look beautiful.

- So do you.

- Thank you.

How are you?

- I'm good. I'm busy. I'm happy.

I'm surviving...

- Good.

- In a world that seems sometimes challenging.

- Yeah?

- I meant to say, um...

I'm sorry.

I heard that your mother died.

- [laughs]

- I only just heard two days ago.

- Oh, thank you.

At first I thought that Lisa Vanderpump

is finally about to apologize to me

for disrespecting me in the Hamptons.

It's not happening.

And I'm an idiot.

Thank you very much. I really appreciate that.

It makes other things seem kind of...

- Trivial?

- Trivial, inconsequential, yes.

- This is what I like to call the great room.

- I love it.

- And everything is a work in progress,

because we moved here two years ago

and J.Lo and Marc Anthony lived in this house.

- They had this house. - They had this house,

but anyway... - I love that.

- Anyway... - Cheers to that.

I know their marriage didn't last,

that's not such a good thing, but the house is nice.

- Hello, Vinny. How are you?

- Nice to see you. - Hi, beautiful.

- Oh, my gosh, we're both in red.

How are you? Good to see you.

- Good to see you. Thank you. Let's do a cheers.

Hi! Pretty.

- You look gorgeous.

- You're rocking red, look at this.

- How are you? - Love that.

Ladies in red.

- I didn't recognize you.

I was like, who's that girl? She doesn't have big hair.

- Is George coming?

- Cheers!

- He's not in town? - George is on tour.

He's playing in Cincinnati tonight.

- Oh, okay. - He's on a tour.

- He's here in spirit. - Oh, yeah.

Oh, but Kyle, he's...

- You'll be able to see him. - I know.

Well, he lives here when he's not on tour.

Do you like this, by the way? Am I okay?

- Yeah, you look great. - Yeah?

- Honey, I love that jacket. - It's kinda rock and roll

with a little bit of... - I love that jacket on you.

- Girlie nurse.

- In your house? - Oh, yeah.

- I'm bummed out that Boy George

is not gonna be at Dorit's birthday party.

I wanted to borrow his eyeliner.

He is a really good makeup artist.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Hello! - How are you?

- Good. How are you? - Nice to see you.

- It was so fun the other night.

- Did you have fun? - Thank you, so fun.

- How are you?

- I see Erika walk in and she's wearing a T-shirt,

and I can't help but think to myself,

well, what about your dress?

Aren't you gonna change?

I mean, the invitation, I think it said, stunning.

- You don't know that my "T-shirt" dress

just came off the Moschino runway, but okay.

Thank you for having me.

I got you just something small.

- Oh, my goodness.

- This is for you. - Thank you so much.

- This is what her small is.

- Thank you. - And if you hate it,

here's the receipt. - Aah!

- You're so a girl after my own heart.

- You look beautiful. - Thank you.

- Happy birthday. - Thank you, same to you.

- Thank you for coming to my birthday.

- Oh, my goodness. - Your party was fun.

- I'm giving Dorit this really cute Chanel,

like, cosmetic bag.

Actually, I wanted it for myself.

I tried to buy two, but she... they only had one.

- He wore ripped jeans tonight, Vinny. I said, "Don't do that."

- Vinny can do whatever he wants.

- He goes, "I am a real person. This is what I'm wearing."

- Guys can do that. They throw on a blazer.

My husband's like, "No, I'm wearing this."

- Eileen. - I'm like, "Honey,

you can't wear ripped jeans." He goes, "Yes, I can."

- Nobody's looking at his pants. They're looking at his face.

- No. He's so hot. It's okay.

- No one's looking at his pants.

[upbeat music]

- Lisa, I have to tell you something.

When you first came over and offered condolences,

I thought you were saying, I just wanted to apologize.

And I went... - Again?

- That's why... That's why I got that...

- Are you out of your mind?

- That's why I had that reaction.

- Never going to apologize... - No, no, shut up.

- One more time. Shut up?

- I thought that's what you said.

Clearly my reaction when she apologized was inappropriate...

[laughs]

Considering what she was apologizing for.

I just don't want any misunderstandings

with Lisa Vanderpump, period.

I didn't know you were offering condolences.

I thought you were saying... - Of course.

- I didn't know that. I thought you were saying

I just want to apologize, and that's why I went...

- That's not gonna happen. - I get that.

I'm not waiting for it. - Okay, okay, good.

- I'm not waiting for it.

- Hell would freeze over

before I will apologize to Eileen Davidson again.

- You guys are getting along. - What?

- You're getting along. - Shut up with all of that.

It's just like being polite.

- Yeah, but being polite is the first step.

- Oh, please, what do you know about being polite.

- It's better than a kick in the ass.

I'm polite. - Since when? Since when?

- I'm a lot more polite than you.

I just think, overall, I'm more polite than Lisa.

Lisa can get a little...

a little rude sometimes.

- I'm Dorit's mom.

- Oh, hello. Hi. Nice to meet you, too.

- Dorit's mom? - Yes.

- So nice to meet you. Kyle.

- Nice to meet you.

- Very nice to meet you. - Yes.

- My husband, Shalom.

- How are you? - Oh, hello.

- Hi. - Nice to meet you.

- Hello, nice to meet you.

- Well, you did a very good job raising your daughter.

- Thank you, darling. - She's lovely.

- Thank you very much. - Thank you.

- Dorit.

Come with me. Come with me.

Come, come. Hello!

- Oh, my gosh. - Hello.

- Stand next to me. Just stand next to me, will you?

- Welcome. - I'm so nervous.

- Anyone who really knows us,

knows that I don't really do things like this.

Too low-profile, too boring.

- Oh, shoot.

- So can we have the lights out?

- Oh, my God.

I'm so excited that there's more to this party

but I have no idea what to expect.

- And can I welcome you all

to Dorit's Buddha lounge?

- Whoo-hoo!

- Oh, my!

- Very cool.

- Happy birthday, darling.

- Oh, my God!

- Oh, my God.

- Coming up...

- I can't find my husband. I'm gonna go track him down.

- I saw him; he was in the corner

with his head up somebody's skirt.

- Can I welcome you all to Dorit's Buddha lounge?

- Oh, my God!

- Oh, my God.

- Oh.

[cheers and applause]

- Wow.

Wow, oh, my God.

- Oh, my God.

The lights, the music, the colors,

I mean, how on earth

he was able to create what he created in our backyard

is astounding.

There's nothing in this party I could have done better.

- You approve? - It's beautiful.

You did a beautiful job. - Thanks, darling.

- This is great. - Good job.

- Thank you. - Yeah, you're welcome.

This is really handsome. - Wow.

- I think PK's doing a great job with this birthday party.

I mean, it's red. There's, like, smoke

and, like, an ice sculpture and sh...

I'm down.

- Look the picture of her over there.

How sweet. - Aw.

- Wow, look at that sexy room back there.

40th birthday party on fleek.

- This is your private...

- Oh, my God.

- This is your private lounge.

- Oh, my God.

- Lisa, I thought you'd approve. - I love it.

- Oh, my God.

Look at the wall of roses.

- Oh, my God. It is so beautiful.

- Happy birthday, darling.

Oh, this is fabulous.

PK has really outdone himself.

We weren't just gonna stand in a room

with little atmosphere.

I knew something big was going on out there.

[upbeat dance music]

♪ ♪

- I'm staring at a big, huge picture of myself.

- That's my new artist.

That's the guy who did Boy George at Goldie Hawn's.

- Oh, you're kidding.

- No, he painted it.

- Oh, no.

- [laughs]

- It was going so well.

- Just to torture you a little bit.

- Remember, this is the person you said was evil.

I'm the evil one.

Suddenly Rinna wants me as her dance partner.

No, life doesn't work like that.

We have to address a couple of these things

if we're gonna move on.

- In the end, I like you more than I don't like you.

- Well, I don't know that I'm going to give you

that second chance.

- Well, you don't have to.

I'm just saying how I feel. You can do whatever you want.

I'm never gonna get an apology from Lisa Vanderpump.

Ever.

So why expect one?

But I forgive her.

Now, I can move on.

She can do whatever she wants. I forgive her.

What would you like to do with me,

and then what are you going to do with me?

- I'd like a f... ing apology.

- I'm sorry for treating you and being hard on you.

I was hard on you.

So I will apologize to you for that.

I'm sorry for being so hard on you.

And I'm not proud of it.

- Okay, let's move on.

- Can we?

- I can. With you.

- Really? - Yeah.

I never thought I'd actually get an apology from Rinna

So this just modicum of remorse

gives me some little bit of hope for the future.

[upbeat dance music]

- Are you still drinking water?

- I'm drinking water.

- Get on it, girl. - What?

- Have a glass of champagne.

- No, no. I've been vomiting for the last two days.

- Why? - No.

- 'Cause I caught a stomach virus.

♪ ♪

- One, two, three.

Oh, spectacular.

- Vinny, do you know how to do this?

- Come on, Vinny. - Get it.

- He got it.

- Vinny, what happened?

Did you turn my whole phone off?

- [laughs]

- You know what, I can't take you anywhere.

♪ ♪

- You feed her. I can't feed her.

- You can feed me. You've known me since I was a child.

- [laughs]

- This is the most action he's had in weeks.

- [laughs]

- I love the fact that PK and I

have mutual friends.

And there's definitely something that kind of bonds you

when you're here from another country.

Can I just wipe my hands on your T-shirt?

- Sure, sure. [laughs] Oh, thank you.

♪ ♪

- 2004, '5, '6, '7

were my years of excess.

And I was like dinner every night,

drinking, gambling, doing all the things.

To be quite honest with you, now I look back

and everything happens for a reason

because for me, I now know I would have died,

and kind of Dorit's a big part of my survival,

you know, she really is.

- Whatever works for you.

- How did you guys meet?

- We met very randomly in a bar in New York.

- Really? - Amazing.

- I killed her with my banter.

Banter in English means chitchat.

- We know what it means, damn it.

- It means the same thing to us.

- We're American. We're not that stupid.

- [laughs]

- Actually, Lucy, it's so good to see you.

I've had a bit of a hard time

over here. - [chuckles]

- No, I've had a bit of a hard time here.

Some of the Americans don't get my humor.

You know how in England you take the piss,

and you can kind of like... Nothing's off limits.

- Yes. You can't do it here.

- Step over the line. - I get into trouble.

I love American humor because I live here and I love America.

However, the British humor is very different.

It's way more aggressive.

Can actually get you in a little bit of trouble sometimes.

[upbeat techno music]

♪ ♪

- This is so good.

- Where are your babies? Are they sleeping upstairs?

- They are. This is my son's room here,

and I moved him into my daughter's room.

But I know that my... My kids are down.

They're down and they're upstairs.

Hello, temptress. - Yes.

- How are you, baby?

What's your take on this fabulous club that we have here?

- I think I'd stay married to him, love.

- I'm really glad you guys are here.

- I know.

I just gonna find my husband. I'm gonna go track him down.

Have you seen him anywhere?

- That's funny, we have to get tracking devices.

- Yeah, I saw him, he was in the corner

with his head up somebody's skirt.

- [sighs]

I don't think so.

- Oh, it was a joke. I'm sorry.

I hope I didn't offend her really... ish.

[dramatic music]

- Coming up...

- Baby, this isn't gonna be easy for me

the next 30 seconds.

- Oh, God.

[upbeat dance music]

- Ladies and gentlemen,

can I encourage everybody to come to the dance floor?

Honey, this is a chair for you.

- Oh, God.

- Okay, so if you can crack the room,

I'd like that chair just behind the light

and I'd like you to sit in it.

Baby, this isn't gonna be easy for me

the next 30 seconds.

- Oh, God, honey.

- My darling Dorit.

As I stand here tonight

welcoming our friends and family,

it's an opportunity for me to confess publicly

what most people already know.

You're the reason...

- Oh, baby.

- You're the reason for my strength.

It's you, baby, and you alone.

Let's go through this world together in love.

Before I met you,

I never knew what it was to smile for no reason.

I can conquer the world with just one hand,

as long as you're holding the other one.

I love you, baby.

Happy birthday.

[cheers and applause]

[chuckles]

- I loved PK's speech.

Oh, he's just got such...

Such a beautiful way of...

Showing his love to me.

He totally outdid himself.

- All right, let's party.

[cheering]

[upbeat dance music]

♪ ♪

- How were your conversations with LVP?

- Mine?

Fine.

- You'd give it an F for fine.

Not an F for failure. And F for fine.

- F for fine.

I think that's as good as it's gonna get

with Lisa Vanderpump.

I'm really hoping this is now closure

and we're moving forward.

No, F for fine.

- Are we well? - Well.

I was looking for Vinny...

She said, "Well, I saw him in the corner,

and he had his head up somebody's skirt."

- Oh. - What?

- Yeah. No, not kidding.

Okay... - Eileen.

- I gotta go.

- Wait, hold on. Hold on.

- Wait, she said that?

- Come on, come on.

- I'm not kidding. - She said that?

- Yeah.

Because she's f... ing funny!

I could take a joke.

I think I've got a really good sense of humor.

I also think I have a pretty good idea

who Lisa Vanderpump is and I don't think this "British humor"

is quite exactly what she's saying it is.

I think it's a little loaded.

- What did you say to her back?

- I said ha-ha, and then I walked away.

- I had such high hopes.

- I guess I'm not having a cake this year.

- Next on "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills"...

[dog sneezes] - Oh!

- Wait. - No, no, no, Lisa.

- Oh, Lisa. - Don't do that, no.

- If I stuck a pole up his ass,

I could probably do the floor, as well.

- Okay, so there's this dating app.

- Dating app?

- And you can't get on it unless you're like,

really special.

- Are you kidding? That's such a crock of sh...

- You all right?

- No. - Oh.

- It's the last time we're going to be there,

and it's saying good-bye

to everything that was her.

Let me just take a second.

- Erika, Kyle needs some underwear.

- I don't have any.

- Oh, oh!

Oh. [laughter]

- I think that Americans need to kind of like...

- What are you talking about? - That's what I'm saying.

- You're born in Connecticut.

- Erika, settle down.

Take a deep breath, for crying out loud.

- To learn more about the Housewives,

go to BravoTV.com.