Original subtitles

[WHISTLING]

[CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP]

BBBBB, YEAH!

[SQUEAKING] COMMENCING BACK TO SCHOOL

SIMULATION.

AND...TIME.

[TICKING] UNH!

[TICKING] UNH!

[DING] THE PAPER CLIPS.

[DING] THE PAPER CLIPS.

I'VE FORGOTTEN THE PAPER CLIPS!

OH, CURSE THOSE MONTHS OF UNREGIMENTED SUMMER

IRRATIONALITY!

[SIGHS] I'M SLOPPY, SLOPPY, SLOPPY.

JULY?

COULDN'T BE.

WE SHOULD BE IN FALL!

SHOULDN'T WE?

TOO HOT FOR YOU, ROLF?

[SPLASH] HA HA!

BETTER COOL OFF, BRO!

OKEY-DOKEY!

PREPARE FOR ROAST WATER-LADEN BOVINE BLADDER!

HA HA HA!

WHIZ, WHIZ, IT'S TIME TO WHAZ!

WHIZ, WHIZ, IT'S TIME TO WHAZ!

WHEE!

SPRINKLE FUN!

I LOVE GETTING SPRINKLED, SARAH!

BUT JUST YESTERDAY, THE AIR WAS COOL, THE LEAVES HAD TURNED

COLOR.

IS THAT BARBEQUE I SMELL?

HA HA HA!

UNH!

THAT'S RIGHT, SOCK HEAD.

NOW, GET OUT THERE AND DRUM UP SOME BUSINESS.

READY FOR SIZZLING, BOSS!

[MOTOR WHIRRING] UH-OH.

OUT OF BURGERS, BOSS.

SO GET SOME MORE.

WHAT?!

HEE HEE HEE!

EXCUSE ME, EDDY, BUT I'M A TRIFLE CONFUSED.

BURGERS 25 CENTS.

EDDY'S SUMMER BARBEQUE.

GOT IT?

NOW, MOVE IT.

WE NEED CUSTOMERS.

GOT BEEF, EDDY!

HA HA HA!

ATTABOY, LUMPY!

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?

NICE HAMBURGER COSTUME...NOT!

PLANK SAYS HALLOWEEN'S A LONG WAYS AWAY, DOUBLE-D.

UH, HOW CAN PLANK BE SURE, JONNY?

DO YOU KNOW WHAT MONTH THIS IS?

WHA?

WELL, HEY, JONNY!

WHAT WILL IT BE THERE, HUNGRY HUMBER?

ONE VEGGIE BURGER FOR ME, EDDY, AND PLANK WILL HAVE TWO

BEEF WITH LOTS OF ONIONS.

[MACHINERY PULSATING] A DOMESTIC HEAT ENCLOSURE?

A LATEX-BASED PIGMENT?

[BIRD CHIRPING] OF ALL THE DISHONEST,

FALSE-HEARTED...

GET THEM WHILE THEY'RE SIZZLING!

WITH RAW GROUND CHUCK, ED BOY, COOKED RARE LIKE PAPA'S

CHAFED ELBOWS.

[CHING] YOU'RE TRYING TO FOOL

EVERYONE INTO THINKING IT'S STILL SUMMER, AREN'T--

SUMMER?

WHAT?

HELLO?

UH, HE SAID SUMMER'S SUPERSWEET.

ZIP IT, BLABBERMOUTH.

YOU'RE GONNA BLOW OUR CASH COW.

IF SUMMER NEVER ENDS, SCHOOL WILL NEVER START, AND IF SCHOOL

NEVER STARTS, IT'S ENDLESS SCAMMING, BROTHER.

[WIND BLOWS] AAH!

I'M C-COLD, SARAH.

WHAT'S HAPPENING?

OH.

NO BIG DEAL!

GET THEM WHILE THEY'RE HOT!

HEY!

HELP, SARAH!

JIMMY!

COME BACK!

UNH!

WHAT IS WITH THIS WEIRD WEATHER?

SEPTEMBER?

IT AIN'T SUMMER.

IT'S FALL, MAN!

SOMEBODY SWIPED OUR CALENDARS.

SONAMAGUN!

NIPPLY KEVIN SPEAKS THE TRUTH!

CHECK IT OUT, BUDDY!

WE MISSED LABOR DAY.

PLANK'S FREAKING OUT!

SO DOESN'T SCHOOL, LIKE, START TOMORROW?

SCHOOL STARTS TOMORROW?!

PENCILS, PAPERS!

BINDERS, PLANK, BINDERS!

I GOT TO PLAN MY LUNCHES.

I'M SO NOT READY!

I STILL HAVE LAST YEAR'S CLOTHES!

[SCREAMING] FORGET ABOUT STUPID SCHOOL!

IT'S SUMMER, I TELL YOU!

DOUBLE-D EDD BOY!

ROLF, KNOWS OF YOUR PECULIAR, PERSNICKETY WAYS.

SURELY YOU HAVE STORED SUPPLIES FOR THE UPCOMING MONTHS OF

INSTRUCTIONAL HARDSHIP!

THE EDD BOY DWELLING!

OF COURSE!

[LAUGHING AND YELLING] BINDERS, BUDDY!

STAMPEDE!

CEASE, DESIST!

THAT'S PRIVATE PROPERTY!

[ALL TALKING AT ONCE] GOOD LORD!

YOU DIDN'T EVEN WIPE YOUR FEET!

[CHEERING] DOUBLE-D's GIVING STUFF AWAY,

EDDY!

WHAT'S THIS ABOUT YOU GIVING STUFF AWAY?

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO COMPETE WITH THAT?

MY SCHOOL SUPPLIES...GONE, PILLAGED, PLUNDERED.

IT CAN'T BE!

[ROOSTER CROWS] IT CAN'T BE!

A HIGHLIGHTER PEN?

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO TAKE NOTES WITH A HIGHLIGHTER?

DOUBLE-D, CAN I HAVE YOUR HAT?

OH, SURE!

WHY NOT?

WHY WOULD I NEED A HAT WHEN SCHOOL IS NOW TOTALLY OUT OF THE

QUESTION?!

[MUTTERING] WAIT.

YOU STILL HAVE IT, DON'T YOU?

FROM YOUR PARENTS, YES.

THE BACK TO SCHOOL SALE COUPON?

HAVEN'T A CLUE WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT, DOUBLE-D.

ALL I GOT IS A BACK TO SCHOOL SALE COUPON FROM MY PARENTS.

THAT STUPID THING'S WORTHLESS.

THE SIGNS ARE AS PLAIN AS THAT GAP IN YOUR TEETH, SOCK HEAD.

SCHOOL AIN'T MEANT TO BE BECAUSE IT'S SUMMER, BABY!

ED, PLEASE, I BEG OF YOU.

I CAN'T BE AT AN ACADEMIC DISADVANTAGE.

OHH!

OUCH!

WITHOUT MY SCHOOL SUPPLIES, MY GRADES ARE SURE TO PLUMMET.

THAT COUPON YOU'RE FLOSSING WITH CAN PROCURE THE SUPPLIES NEEDED

TO CROSS THE DESOLATE DESERT OF SCHOLASTIC LEARNING!

OH, PU-LEASE!

SOUNDS GOOD TO ME, WHATEVER YOU JUST SAID.

OH!

QUICKLY, ED.

WE HAVE SHOPPING TO DO!

OH, COME ON, GUYS!

FORGET SCHOOL, WILL YOU?

SUMMER AIN'T OVER!

BRR.

ED.

YOU'D HAVE MUCH LESS BRUISING IF YOU'D GO AROUND THE DOOR.

OH, AND DON'T FORGET THE PAPER CLIPS.

HA HA HA!

WILL YOU QUIT WASTING YOUR TIME?

THINK OF THE SCAMS WE COULD BE PULLING RIGHT NOW.

TIME IS ONE THING I CANNOT AFFORD TO WASTE, EDDY.

TOMORROW IS THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL, AND I WILL

ENTHUSIASTICALLY EMBRACE THE JUBILATION OF ITS MORNING BELL.

ALL DONE, DOUBLE-D.

BRAVO, ED!

YOU HAVE NO IDEA THE BURDEN LIFTED FROM MY NONEXISTENT

SHOULDERS.

FOR YOU, ONE BAG OF PANCAKE MIX, ONE BLENDER, ONE

STEPPITY-STEP, AND A PENCIL.

ED, THAT PENCIL IS RIDDLED WITH TEETH MARKS.

WHY, THANK YOU!

WELL, GOOD LUCK WIT THOSE NEW SUPPLIES, EGGHEAD, BUT SUMMER'S

STILL ON IN MY BOOKS.

LUMPY AND ME ARE GONNA SQUEEZE EVERY BIT OF FUN OUT OF IT.

SCHOOL AIN'T COOL, RIGHT MONOBROW?

SQUEEZE ME, EDDY!

IN YOUR DREAMS, ED.

HA HA HA!

ONE MUST DO WITH WHAT ONE HAS, I SUPPOSE.

HA HA HA!

HA HA HA!

HOO HOO HOO!

[SQUEAKING] WHERE IS EVERYBODY?

SLEEPING ALREADY?

HEY, GET UP AND HAVE SOME FUN AT ED'S SUMMER WATER TIME FUN PARK!

ONLY 25 CENTS!

DON'T YOU THINK IT'S BEST YOU GET SOME REST?

AFTER ALL, SLEEPING IN IS A THING OF THE PAST.

IT'S AN EARLY START TO A BRAND-NEW DAY, GENTLEMEN.

NIGHTY-NIGHT.

WAIT!

HOW CAN YOU GO TO BED WHEN THE GOOD TIMES ARE HAPPENING RIGHT

HERE, RIGHT NOW?

RIGHT, ED?

I C-CAN'T FEEL MY L-LEGS, EDDY!

SEE?

FORGET THEM, LUMPY.

COME ON!

RACE YOU!

GERONIMO!

TORPEDO AWAY!

HA HA HA!

STOP, EDDY!

OW!

[CRASH] WAIT FOR ME, EDDY!

DOUBLE-D!

WHAT DID I TELL YOU?

SUMMERTIME GOOD TIMES ARE WET!

GOOD TIMES.

YEP.

PERHAPS SCHOOL WILL ALLOW YOU TWO THE OPPORTUNITY TO IMPROVE

YOUR CONSTRUCTION SKILLS.

SWEET DREAMS.

[OWL HOOTING] [ROOSTER CROWING]

[BELLS JINGLING] [WHEEL SQUEAKING]

[GOAT BLEATING] ROLF HAD TO USE A TROWEL TO

BREAK AWAY ROLF'S EYE CRUSTATION THIS MORNING.

THANK YOU FOR SHARING THAT, ROLF.

ED, WAKE UP!

RACE YOU TO SCHOOL, KEVIN!

RIGHT NOW, I'M JUST CRUISING.

GOOD MORNING, GENTLEMEN.

I'VE TAKEN THE LIBERTY OF CLEANING AND PRESSING YOUR

SCHOOL ATTIRE.

NO THANKS ARE NECESSARY.

HEE HEE HEE!

THE DAYS OF RECKONING ARE UPON US, HALF-NAKED ED BOYS.

IT IS HERE THAT WE SHALL BE MERCILESSLY JUDGED.

THIS STINKS!

TIME FOR SCHOOL NOW, EDDY.

THERE'S NO GETTING AROUND IT.

COMING, ED?

OH, YES, I AM.

♪ STINKY BOOKS, STINKY BOOKS STINKY BOOKS, STINKY BOOKS ♪

[BELL RINGS] HELLO, BELL!

OH. HELLO, LOCKER.

HELLO, SHINY, SPECKLED FLOORS.

ISN'T THIS EXHILARATING?

YOU CAN FEEL THE KNOWLEDGE IN THE AIR.

YEAH, CALL THE NURSE BECAUSE I'M CHOKING ON IT.

OH, LOOK!

THE HOMEROOM POSTINGS.

SHALL WE?

SHALL WE?

CHOICE!

WE'RE ALL IN THE SAME HOMEROOM.

[GOAT BLEATS] LET'S SIT TOGETHER LIKE LAST

YEAR, OK?

IT IS ALWAYS GOOD TO HAVE FRIENDS CLOSE BY IN THIS OUR

TIME OF FIRE.

CONGRATULATIONS!

OH, I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU!

TOGETHER AGAIN FOR ANOTHER YEAR OF RESOURCEFUL RAPTURE.

ISN'T THIS EXCITING?

WHAT A DWEEB.

YES.

"PATRICK, PETER, PHILIP, PLANK!"

SEE, I TOLD YOU'D WE'D BE IN THE SAME CLASS.

WORRYWART!

AH, THERE I AM.

HUH?

WHAT?

[GASPS] HA HA HA!

HA HA HA!

HA HA HA!

GENTLEMEN, GENTLEMEN, I BEAR BAD TIDINGS.

WE 3 HAVE BEEN ASSIGNED SEPARATE HOMEROOMS.

WE 3?

COULDN'T BE.

OH, WHERE, OH, WHERE HAVE MY LITTLE CHUMS GONE?

SO NOW WHAT, EINSTEIN?

OUCH.

WELL, I COULD REQUISITION A CHANGE OF ELECTIVE FORM FROM THE

SCHOOL DISTRICT.

WITH THE PROPER NOTARIES AND SIGNATURES FROM OUR PARENTS, WE

COULD HAVE A REASSIGNMENT AS SOON AS 3 TO 4 WEEKS.

4 WEEKS?!

WHAT'S YOUR HURRY, MAY?

[SIREN] KANKERS!

COME ON.

LET'S SEE IF THEY SPLIT US UP THIS YEAR!

LIKE WE CARE.

YO, MARIE, WHEN'S THE LAST TIME WE WENT TO CLASS?

HOW THE HECK SHOULD I KNOW?

FIGURE IT OUT.

OH, GOODY-GOODY.

WE'RE IN THE SAME HOMEROOM, GUYS!

UNH!

WHO CARES, I SAID.

SHE'S DUMBER THAN A TRUCK TIRE, I SWEAR.

I LOVE TRUCK TIRES.

[CRASH] DID YOU HEAR THAT, EDDY?

THE KANKERS ARE TOGETHER IN THE SAME HOMEROOM.

SO?

IF WE JUST SIMPLY ASKED THEM TO TRADE PLACES WITH US, YOU,

ED, AND I COULD BE IN THE SAME CLASS TOGETHER.

ARE YOU NUTS?

WHY WOULD I WANT TO DO THAT?

IT'S NOT LIKE THEY WOULD ATTEND, BUT IF THEY DID, YOU

WOULD BE IN THE SAME CLASS AS THEM, EDDY.

HAPPY TOGETHER HAPPILY, GUYS.

UH, SO WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR?

HMM.

HEH HEH HEH.

SHH!

[KANKERS LAUGHING] HEY, THAT CHAIR IS MINE!

IT'S GOT MY GUM STUCK TO THE BOTTOM OF IT.

THAT GUM'S MINE!

I WAS SAVING IT FOR LATER!

QUIT GOOFING AROUND AND HELP ME DECORATE.

WE'VE GOT A FULL YEAR OF HOOKY AHEAD OF US, GIRLS.

WHAT DID THEY DO WITH THE JANITOR?

ANOTHER CLEANING MAN FALLS PREY TO THEIR HUNGER THAT IS

EVIL.

NOW, NOW, LET'S NOT GET ALL DRAMATIC.

I'M SURE IF WE ADVANCE WITH DIPLOMACY WE WILL BE REASONABLY

SAFE TO MAKE A FAIR PROPOSAL.

YOU FIRST!

YAAH!

IT'S OUR BOY TOY, GUYS!

CHECK HIM OUT.

HE MUST BE GOOD AT GYMNASTICS.

LET'S FIND OUT.

WAIT!

UM, TATER-TOTS?

HEY, GET OUT OF MY WAY!

[CRASH] [YELLING]

WHY, HELLO, LEE.

UM, MY FRIENDS AND I HAVE BEEN PUT IN A PRECARIOUS POSITION.

IT SEEMS WE'VE BEEN PLACED IN 3 SEPARATE HOMEROOMS.

[PIGS SQUEALING] NORMALLY, I WOULD GO THROUGH

PROPER CHANNELS, BUT I FELT A MORE PERSONAL APPROACH MIGHT

BE-- SO YOU WANT TO SWITCH PLACES

WITH US ON THE LIST, RIGHT?

I COULDN'T HAVE SAID IT BETTER MYSELF.

SO WHAT'S IN IT FOR US?

OH, I KNOW.

I WANT A PUBLIC DECLARATION OF MY HONEY'S LOVE FOR ME.

GOOD ONE, MARIE!

I WANT EVERYONE IN SCHOOL TO KNOW ABOUT ME AND BIG ED, TOO!

AND EDDY'S GOT ME COVERED.

YOU GOT YOURSELF A DEAL, DREAMBOAT.

HA HA HA!

KEEP LOOKING, BUDDY.

I'VE BEEN HANKERING FOR A BAG OF NUTS ALL DAY!

UH, HEY, GUYS.

HAVE YOU SEEN MY NEW GIRLFRIEND?

DORKY'S GOT A GIRLFRIEND.

[ALL LAUGHING] YEAH, AIN'T SHE SOMETHING?

WHOA!

[TIRES SCREECHING] HIYA, ED.

DOES YOUR MOM SHRINK YOUR CLOTHES IN THE WASH, TOO?

NOPE.

UM, "I AM EX-HIBIT-ING MY LOVE FOR POINT AT MAY BECAUSE SHE IS

SO CUTE AND HAS A PERFECT FIGURE WITH GREAT TOOTH."

UM, "TEETH."

AM I A GOOD READER OR WHAT?

MY NAME IS EDD WITH TWO Ds, AND I, UH, LOVE MARIE KANKER.

HA HA HA!

YES, I DO.

♪ OH, THERE'S NOTHING I LIKE BETTER

THAN PIGGYBACKING MY GAL MARIE KANK-- ♪

[KIDS LAUGHING] YOU CAN QUIT LAUGHING NOW,

PLANK.

IT'S OVER.

[MUTTERING] THERE.

HAPPY?

A DEAL'S A DEAL.

YEAH, A DEAL'S A DEAL, RIGHT, GIRLS?

THANK YOU.

YOUR SIGNATURE ON THE DOTTED LINE, YES, AND THE HOMEROOM

NUMBER THERE.

THEY'RE SO CUTE WHEN THEY'RE SERIOUS.

BINGO!

TOGETHER ONCE AGAIN!

I'VE MISSED YOU GUYS.

SHALL WE SEE WHAT HOMEROOM WE'LL RESIDE IN THIS YEAR?

V-V-V-V-V-V-VROOM!

ROOM 212.

HMM.

I'M NOT FAMILIAR WITH THAT CLASS.

AAH!

FOUND IT!

OUR NEW HOMEROOM!

OH, THE JOY OF STRUCTURED EDUCATION.

WHAT KIND OF CLASSROOM IS THIS?

WHERE'S ALL THE DESKS?

EH, THIS IS BUNK!

WE'RE IN A GIRLS' BATHROOM!

OH, THIS IS FORBIDDEN.

CLOSE YOUR EYES, CLOSE YOUR EYES!

ED, YOU IDIOT!

BEEN AROUND THE BLOCK NOW, EDDY.

[BOOM] CLASS IS NOW IN SESSION.

STUDENTS, BE SEATED.

[PANTING] [MUTTERING]

AAH!

HEE HEE HEE!

TODAY'S LESSON--TOUCHY FEELY 101.

BUT FIRST, A LITTLE VISUAL AID.

ASSISTANTS MAY AND MARIE, IF YOU COULD BE SO KIND.

WOULD I EVER?!

MM, MM, MM, MM, MM.

HEE HEE HEE!

WAIT, I-I HAVEN'T STUDIED FOR THIS LESSON.

RUN AWAY!

HOLY SMOLY!

NO MORE KISSES!

OK, THAT'S IT!

I'M TELLING THE TEACHER ON YOU!

I'M ALL EARS, MY LITTLE TEACHER'S PET.

HA HA HA!

AAH!

[SCREAMING]

[CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP]

[CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE --www.ncicap.org--]

[WHISTLING]

ED, EDD, N EDDY!

BBBBB, YEAH!