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1
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Okay, rehearsal's up.
2
00:00:04,065 --> 00:00:05,965
And, action.
3
00:00:05,916 --> 00:00:09,286
Konichiwa and welcome.
4
00:00:09,187 --> 00:00:11,857
To America's favorite Japanese game show:
5
00:00:11,777 --> 00:00:14,747
"where's the wasabi?"
6
00:00:15,624 --> 00:00:17,524
One of these pieces of Sushi.
7
00:00:17,475 --> 00:00:21,085
Is loaded with super spicy
Japanese wasabi mustard.
8
00:00:20,967 --> 00:00:24,197
Contestants, where's the wasabi?
9
00:00:24,103 --> 00:00:27,103
- Is it in the salmon?
- Is it in the salmon?
10
00:00:29,158 --> 00:00:30,598
Oh, it's just fishy.
11
00:00:30,568 --> 00:00:33,708
Oh oh, octopus.
It's in the octopus.
12
00:00:33,609 --> 00:00:35,349
Is it in the octopus?
13
00:00:37,676 --> 00:00:40,546
Uh... Chewy.
14
00:00:40,458 --> 00:00:43,228
- Squishy.
- Hmmm.
15
00:00:43,153 --> 00:00:45,283
Huh... hoo ha.
Ooh, that's hot.
16
00:00:45,235 --> 00:00:47,395
Oh ah ah!
It's hot!
17
00:00:47,345 --> 00:00:51,115
Guys, why is there real wasabi in there?
18
00:00:51,201 --> 00:00:54,451
- It burns!
- And that's...
19
00:00:54,357 --> 00:00:58,087
- How we play "where's the wasabi"?
- Water water!
20
00:00:57,973 --> 00:01:01,133
How do we play "where's the funny"?
Because I'm not seeing it.
21
00:01:01,043 --> 00:01:03,973
Oh, water!
22
00:01:03,892 --> 00:01:07,892
- But you said you loved this sketch.
- That was 20 minutes ago.
23
00:01:07,767 --> 00:01:10,897
Oh, water water!
24
00:01:10,808 --> 00:01:14,438
What's going on? You haven't liked a
single sketch we've written all week.
25
00:01:14,328 --> 00:01:15,828
That's because there's nothing to like.
26
00:01:15,796 --> 00:01:18,896
And this sketch?
This sketch stinks on rice.
27
00:01:18,808 --> 00:01:23,448
See what I did there? Instead of
stinks on ice, I said stinks on rice.
28
00:01:23,287 --> 00:01:25,787
Because it's Sushi.
That's comedy!
29
00:01:25,724 --> 00:01:27,724
And I want to see some by tomorrow.
30
00:01:34,357 --> 00:01:37,027
Ahhh.
31
00:01:36,956 --> 00:01:40,226
So, uh, so did Marshall like the sketch?
32
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♪ off to the races,I'm going places ♪
33
00:01:47,037 --> 00:01:50,107
♪ might be a long shot,not gonna waste it ♪
34
00:01:50,011 --> 00:01:54,621
♪ this is the big breakand it's calling my name ♪
35
00:01:54,462 --> 00:01:56,632
♪ yeah ♪
36
00:01:56,572 --> 00:01:59,512
♪ so far, so great,get with it ♪
37
00:01:59,421 --> 00:02:02,421
♪ at leastthat's how I see it ♪
38
00:02:02,337 --> 00:02:05,767
♪ having a dreamis just the beginning ♪
39
00:02:05,665 --> 00:02:08,795
♪ so far, so great,believe it ♪
40
00:02:08,706 --> 00:02:11,706
♪ can't take awaythis feeling ♪
41
00:02:11,622 --> 00:02:14,722
♪ taking a ridewith chance on my side ♪
42
00:02:14,625 --> 00:02:16,625
♪ yeah, I can't wait ♪
43
00:02:16,581 --> 00:02:19,381
♪ so far, so great ♪
44
00:02:19,296 --> 00:02:21,166
♪ so far,so great ♪
45
00:02:21,128 --> 00:02:24,558
♪ ba ba da da-da,ba da da da-da ♪
46
00:02:24,457 --> 00:02:27,227
♪ ba ba da da-da,ba da da da-da ♪
47
00:02:27,142 --> 00:02:29,112
♪ yow! ♪
48
00:02:29,224 --> 00:02:30,424
www.Itfriend.ORG
www.Addic7ed.com
49
00:02:36,169 --> 00:02:38,639
- I'm exhausted.
- Yeah.
50
00:02:38,567 --> 00:02:41,407
We've been trying to come up
with a sketch all night.
51
00:02:45,224 --> 00:02:47,434
Okay okay, I got this.
52
00:02:47,372 --> 00:02:50,242
How about this sketch?
Let me just turn the camera on.
53
00:02:50,154 --> 00:02:51,694
Okay.
54
00:02:51,660 --> 00:02:54,930
All right, so there's a lizard, right?
55
00:02:54,825 --> 00:02:57,465
And he goes to the north pole.
56
00:02:57,387 --> 00:02:59,827
And then a bunch of funny stuff happens.
57
00:02:59,756 --> 00:03:02,056
But at the end of it he says,
58
00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:05,230
"iguana wish you
a merry Christmas."
59
00:03:06,509 --> 00:03:08,209
Yeah, ha ha ha!
60
00:03:08,178 --> 00:03:10,308
Who's with me?
61
00:03:10,259 --> 00:03:12,529
We can't send that video to Marshall.
62
00:03:12,466 --> 00:03:14,866
- He's miserable enough already.
- Yeah.
63
00:03:14,806 --> 00:03:18,136
This is ridiculous.
What is Marshall's problem?
64
00:03:18,039 --> 00:03:21,039
He's been snippy for weeks.
Nothing makes him happy.
65
00:03:20,945 --> 00:03:23,855
I know, right?
Ooh, I got it...
66
00:03:23,765 --> 00:03:25,995
Who am I?
Who am I? Ready?
67
00:03:25,943 --> 00:03:28,313
See what I did there?
See what I did there?
68
00:03:28,245 --> 00:03:31,145
I changed ice to rice, 'cause it's Sushi.
69
00:03:31,065 --> 00:03:33,135
And I'm Marshall pike!
70
00:03:33,079 --> 00:03:35,349
See what I did there?
See what I did there?
71
00:03:35,285 --> 00:03:37,125
My turn, my turn!
72
00:03:37,079 --> 00:03:41,249
I don't have any good ideas.
I just hate all yours.
73
00:03:41,108 --> 00:03:43,218
What?
74
00:03:43,161 --> 00:03:46,261
'cause I'm the boss.
75
00:03:46,173 --> 00:03:48,173
I'm in charge.
76
00:03:48,120 --> 00:03:49,990
Okay.
77
00:03:49,942 --> 00:03:51,812
Unless my mommy calls.
78
00:03:55,160 --> 00:03:57,600
Marshall, it's your mother.
79
00:03:57,530 --> 00:03:59,570
I want you home
by 6:00.
80
00:03:59,515 --> 00:04:02,685
So we can go girdle shopping.
81
00:04:02,585 --> 00:04:05,555
For you.
82
00:04:07,448 --> 00:04:11,658
- That's so good.
- Guys, guys, guys,
83
00:04:11,515 --> 00:04:13,485
Let's call it a night, all right?
84
00:04:13,434 --> 00:04:15,844
Let's just send him Sonny's
stupid iguana thing.
85
00:04:15,774 --> 00:04:18,174
I mean, whatever we send he'll hate anyway.
86
00:04:20,800 --> 00:04:22,730
You know what we should send him.
87
00:04:22,690 --> 00:04:24,720
Is our Marshall impressions.
88
00:04:24,666 --> 00:04:26,276
Ha!
Yeah right.
89
00:04:26,239 --> 00:04:28,309
Seriously though, you should delete those.
90
00:04:28,253 --> 00:04:31,923
No no no, actually I'm gonna
send them right now, Marshall.
91
00:04:31,803 --> 00:04:34,143
Come on, you wouldn't dare.
92
00:04:34,076 --> 00:04:36,416
Oh you...
you don't think I would?
93
00:04:36,349 --> 00:04:38,419
- No, come on.
- Um, no.
94
00:04:38,373 --> 00:04:40,833
- You wouldn't dare.
- You don't think I'll do it?
95
00:04:40,771 --> 00:04:43,041
- No!
- No, we just said no.
96
00:04:42,978 --> 00:04:45,678
That's really funny,
'cause I just hit send.
97
00:04:45,606 --> 00:04:48,176
What'd you do?
98
00:04:48,100 --> 00:04:51,300
- Are you crazy? - Relax relax.
I hit delete, okay?
99
00:04:51,208 --> 00:04:54,138
- Oh, trying to scare me.
- Oh my gosh, I hit send!
100
00:04:54,057 --> 00:04:58,257
No, unsend unsend!
101
00:05:07,975 --> 00:05:11,415
Sorry. I feel like I've been
called to the principal's office.
102
00:05:11,303 --> 00:05:14,343
I was home-schooled.
I feel like I'm in my mother's kitchen.
103
00:05:14,248 --> 00:05:18,188
Get ready to move back there because
none of us are keeping our jobs.
104
00:05:18,056 --> 00:05:20,696
Look, relax.
Nobody is losing their jobs, okay?
105
00:05:20,617 --> 00:05:24,257
Not if we stick together and tell
Marshall we were just fooling around.
106
00:05:24,138 --> 00:05:27,008
- Yeah.
- We were just blowing off steam.
107
00:05:26,929 --> 00:05:28,959
- Yeah, you're right.
- You're right.
108
00:05:28,915 --> 00:05:32,145
- Fire Sonny! - Oh, we have no free will.
She did it!
109
00:05:32,051 --> 00:05:35,581
- Sonny did it.
- Marshall, look,
110
00:05:35,476 --> 00:05:38,546
I'm really really sorry.
111
00:05:38,449 --> 00:05:41,189
We all are.
112
00:05:41,106 --> 00:05:43,376
Look, I'm not happy about what you did.
113
00:05:43,312 --> 00:05:45,782
But it really showed me
how crabby I've been lately.
114
00:05:45,710 --> 00:05:49,180
I guess it's because I turned
40-something last week.
115
00:05:49,077 --> 00:05:51,907
You're 40-something?
116
00:05:51,830 --> 00:05:54,260
Would that something be 50?
117
00:05:59,226 --> 00:06:02,126
I always thought by the time
I turned 40-something
118
00:06:02,036 --> 00:06:05,846
- I'd be something. - But, Marshall, you are.
You have a really great job.
119
00:06:05,720 --> 00:06:08,560
Yeah, but I always wanted to perform,
120
00:06:08,473 --> 00:06:10,773
To be on the stage
121
00:06:12,636 --> 00:06:14,266
"my life with ma";
122
00:06:14,238 --> 00:06:16,738
To hear the applause and the laughter,
123
00:06:16,665 --> 00:06:18,505
Just like you kids do after every show.
124
00:06:18,458 --> 00:06:20,758
Ah well.
125
00:06:20,703 --> 00:06:23,903
I'll just keep bottling it up
and take my anger out on you.
126
00:06:23,801 --> 00:06:26,771
Yeah, that's what I'm gonna do.
127
00:06:26,688 --> 00:06:29,058
Now come up with a sketch that's funny!
128
00:06:28,990 --> 00:06:32,490
- You see what I did there?
- Yeah yeah.
129
00:06:32,386 --> 00:06:36,286
All right, well, at least
we still have our jobs.
130
00:06:36,165 --> 00:06:39,695
Yeah, let's get out of here before
somebody makes things worse.
131
00:06:40,703 --> 00:06:42,813
Hey, where's Sonny?
132
00:06:45,096 --> 00:06:47,126
- Sonny!
- Don't make things worse!
133
00:06:47,072 --> 00:06:48,582
Sonny...
134
00:06:49,767 --> 00:06:51,597
Ahem.
135
00:06:51,561 --> 00:06:53,791
What are you still doing here?
136
00:06:53,729 --> 00:06:57,199
Marshall, I think that you
should go for your dream.
137
00:06:57,096 --> 00:06:58,966
And do your one-man show.
138
00:06:58,918 --> 00:07:01,188
Well, I can't just leave and drop.
139
00:07:01,124 --> 00:07:03,294
All my responsibilities
at "so random!"
140
00:07:03,235 --> 00:07:05,205
Why not?
We'll be okay.
141
00:07:05,163 --> 00:07:08,163
Well, I... I guess
it would be a shame.
142
00:07:08,069 --> 00:07:10,509
For a script like this to go to waste.
143
00:07:10,438 --> 00:07:12,908
That's your one-man show?
144
00:07:12,836 --> 00:07:16,446
I live with my mother.
There's only one room where I have any privacy.
145
00:07:16,328 --> 00:07:18,968
The first act, second act.
146
00:07:20,165 --> 00:07:22,205
Come on, Marshall,
you don't want to just...
147
00:07:22,150 --> 00:07:25,390
Flush this dream down the toilet.
148
00:07:25,287 --> 00:07:27,957
Do you? No.
You wanna know why?
149
00:07:27,877 --> 00:07:30,347
'cause you were born
to play these "rolls."
150
00:07:30,285 --> 00:07:32,615
See what I did there?
151
00:07:32,558 --> 00:07:34,118
Why, yes I did.
152
00:07:34,093 --> 00:07:35,723
I'm convinced.
153
00:07:35,695 --> 00:07:37,495
Sonny, I'm gonna take off two weeks.
154
00:07:37,450 --> 00:07:39,390
And live the dream.
155
00:07:39,340 --> 00:07:42,210
Ooh ooh, I should write
about this in my diary.
156
00:07:43,436 --> 00:07:46,746
"dear diary, I'm taking
the plunge."
157
00:07:50,543 --> 00:07:52,843
It's so freeing with Marshall gone.
158
00:07:52,788 --> 00:07:56,358
I can just sit around
all day reading magazines.
159
00:07:56,241 --> 00:07:59,181
Um, you do that when Marshall is here.
160
00:07:59,090 --> 00:08:02,420
Yes, but do I do this?
161
00:08:04,788 --> 00:08:07,118
Yes.
162
00:08:07,061 --> 00:08:09,761
It just feels freer, okay?
163
00:08:17,047 --> 00:08:18,947
You haven't even gotten dressed yet?
164
00:08:18,898 --> 00:08:20,908
Oh no no no no.
165
00:08:20,855 --> 00:08:22,955
I slept in my shirt and jeans.
166
00:08:22,907 --> 00:08:25,907
I changed into this.
167
00:08:26,744 --> 00:08:28,274
Wanna know why?
168
00:08:28,250 --> 00:08:30,280
'cause I can.
Marshall's not here.
169
00:08:30,236 --> 00:08:32,966
So every day is jammy day.
170
00:08:34,169 --> 00:08:36,439
What?
171
00:08:36,375 --> 00:08:38,285
- You were doing jammy day?
- Yeah.
172
00:08:38,236 --> 00:08:40,306
I'm doing jammy day!
173
00:08:40,250 --> 00:08:42,590
Jammy slam!
174
00:08:47,933 --> 00:08:50,233
So are you wearing a diaper?
175
00:08:51,425 --> 00:08:53,325
No!
176
00:08:53,276 --> 00:08:56,246
Well, ahem, me neither.
177
00:08:56,164 --> 00:08:58,564
But thanks to Sonny,
178
00:08:58,494 --> 00:09:01,934
We could totally wear one if we wanted to.
179
00:09:01,823 --> 00:09:05,493
Uh, excuse me, kids,
is this "so random!"?
180
00:09:05,382 --> 00:09:06,942
Yeah, it sure is.
How can we help you?
181
00:09:06,916 --> 00:09:09,746
I'm Stanley.
I'll be filling in for Marshall.
182
00:09:09,669 --> 00:09:11,999
Great, there goes our freedom.
183
00:09:11,943 --> 00:09:13,373
- Yeah.
- Huh.
184
00:09:13,343 --> 00:09:15,443
From a guy named Stanley?
Please.
185
00:09:15,396 --> 00:09:17,566
♪ pushover! ♪.
186
00:09:19,233 --> 00:09:23,343
You're right, stanley can be
a bit of a pushover.
187
00:09:23,204 --> 00:09:24,774
But you know who isn't?
188
00:09:24,739 --> 00:09:27,809
Savage stan!
189
00:09:31,146 --> 00:09:35,246
Are you ready to take
your comedy to the extreme?
190
00:09:35,108 --> 00:09:38,078
Because until Marshall comes back.
191
00:09:37,995 --> 00:09:41,825
We're going to yuk it up
gladiator-style!
192
00:09:46,024 --> 00:09:48,264
I'm scared.
193
00:09:49,669 --> 00:09:52,839
Bet you wish you were
wearing a diaper now, huh?
194
00:09:58,292 --> 00:10:02,002
Listen up, you comedy cream puffs.
195
00:10:03,031 --> 00:10:05,871
I was the executive producer.
196
00:10:05,784 --> 00:10:09,224
At "tween gladiators," but there was.
197
00:10:09,112 --> 00:10:11,352
An incident.
198
00:10:12,671 --> 00:10:16,101
And now I am your new executive producer.
199
00:10:15,999 --> 00:10:20,129
Ah. ( Chuckles )
excuse me, Mr. Savage.
200
00:10:19,999 --> 00:10:23,059
Uh, d-define incident.
201
00:10:24,412 --> 00:10:28,282
The pinkie is overrated.
202
00:10:36,958 --> 00:10:40,028
I knew we were one short.
Now get in line!
203
00:10:42,109 --> 00:10:45,319
Now here's the deal:
Your sketches are weak.
204
00:10:45,217 --> 00:10:47,287
Your jokes are flabby.
205
00:10:47,232 --> 00:10:50,742
And your characters are as
undeveloped as this guy's arms.
206
00:10:52,997 --> 00:10:55,997
- I'm a 12-year-old girl.
- No excuse!
207
00:10:57,284 --> 00:10:59,084
It kind of is.
208
00:10:59,049 --> 00:11:01,409
Zip it!
209
00:11:01,351 --> 00:11:03,481
Now we are gonna put the punch.
210
00:11:03,433 --> 00:11:05,193
In punchline, the slap.
211
00:11:05,159 --> 00:11:08,159
In slapstick.
And if we break a few bones.
212
00:11:08,075 --> 00:11:09,805
In the process,
213
00:11:09,764 --> 00:11:11,464
It'll be funny.
214
00:11:12,555 --> 00:11:15,825
Broken funny bones.
215
00:11:16,843 --> 00:11:19,013
Do you see what I did there?
216
00:11:22,349 --> 00:11:24,419
I don't like what you did there.
217
00:11:27,787 --> 00:11:30,227
Good morning, cream puffs.
218
00:11:30,157 --> 00:11:33,297
Good morning, savage stan.
219
00:11:33,197 --> 00:11:36,027
Wasn't he clean-shaven
last night?
220
00:11:35,950 --> 00:11:38,180
Oh yeah, he was.
221
00:11:38,128 --> 00:11:41,058
I shave four times a day!
222
00:11:40,977 --> 00:11:44,047
- It is my private shame!
- Okay okay.
223
00:11:43,950 --> 00:11:45,980
Now!
224
00:11:45,936 --> 00:11:48,836
Marshall says your
"where's the wasabi?" sketch.
225
00:11:48,756 --> 00:11:51,686
Was weak.
That is because you are weak.
226
00:11:51,595 --> 00:11:56,105
- Oh. - So you are going
to be doing push-ups.
227
00:11:55,950 --> 00:11:58,850
Over bowls of wasabi.
228
00:11:58,770 --> 00:12:01,640
Now drop and give me funny!
229
00:12:04,084 --> 00:12:08,054
- Where is the wasabi?!
- ( Falters ) is it in the salmon?
230
00:12:07,921 --> 00:12:11,561
No.
Where is the wasabi?!
231
00:12:11,442 --> 00:12:13,742
Is it in the octopus?
232
00:12:13,686 --> 00:12:17,526
- No. - I don't know
what he wants us to say.
233
00:12:17,398 --> 00:12:19,968
Where is the wasabi?
234
00:12:21,619 --> 00:12:23,689
It's in my eyes!
235
00:12:23,643 --> 00:12:25,903
Yes!
236
00:12:25,849 --> 00:12:28,149
Now that is funny.
237
00:12:28,084 --> 00:12:30,754
It burns.
Oh, it burns.
238
00:12:33,302 --> 00:12:34,642
Knock knock.
239
00:12:34,616 --> 00:12:36,316
Who's there?
240
00:12:36,285 --> 00:12:38,615
Knock knock.
Who's there?
241
00:12:40,247 --> 00:12:43,487
Hey, guys, good news.
The doctor says I'm gonna be fine.
242
00:12:43,384 --> 00:12:47,254
- As long as I don't get anything else in my eyes.
- Oh, that's great.
243
00:12:47,134 --> 00:12:51,134
Why is there wasabi on that thing?
244
00:12:51,009 --> 00:12:54,439
Oh, it burns.
Oh, it burns.
245
00:12:54,338 --> 00:12:56,598
This guy kills me.
246
00:12:56,544 --> 00:13:00,074
Ow, it burns, guys.
It burns bad!
247
00:12:59,968 --> 00:13:02,538
Next we are going to do.
248
00:13:02,462 --> 00:13:04,832
An observational exercise.
249
00:13:04,765 --> 00:13:06,865
Because comedy is all around you.
250
00:13:06,817 --> 00:13:11,247
Now who's our first volunteer?
251
00:13:12,707 --> 00:13:14,737
Run!
252
00:13:18,980 --> 00:13:20,950
Call for help.
Call for help.
253
00:13:20,899 --> 00:13:23,729
Call for help.
254
00:13:26,280 --> 00:13:28,610
Hi, Marshall, how's it going?
255
00:13:28,544 --> 00:13:30,884
Sonny, Sonny, you pushing
me out the door was.
256
00:13:30,817 --> 00:13:32,787
The greatest thing that
ever happened to me.
257
00:13:32,735 --> 00:13:34,905
Ask him when he's coming back.
258
00:13:34,855 --> 00:13:38,585
So, Marshall, any chance we'll be
seeing you sooner than two weeks?
259
00:13:38,472 --> 00:13:41,072
- Absolutely.
- Great.
260
00:13:40,994 --> 00:13:43,064
If you come to the theater,
261
00:13:43,009 --> 00:13:45,419
'cause that's where I'm going
to be for the rest of my life.
262
00:13:45,349 --> 00:13:48,989
- I'm quitting "so random!"
- You're quitting "so random!"?
263
00:13:48,869 --> 00:13:50,799
- No!
- No!
264
00:13:50,759 --> 00:13:52,489
No!
265
00:13:52,457 --> 00:13:54,557
Thanks.
All right, guys.
266
00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:57,800
Good news... the wasabi
blindness is temporary.
267
00:13:57,704 --> 00:14:00,474
I just have to avoid physical activity.
268
00:14:00,390 --> 00:14:02,490
For the next three seconds, so...
269
00:14:02,442 --> 00:14:04,872
Three, two... ( screams )
270
00:14:07,910 --> 00:14:09,880
Marshall! Marshall!Marshall!
271
00:14:09,838 --> 00:14:10,968
Marshall!
272
00:14:10,951 --> 00:14:13,691
Guys, I think it's this way.
273
00:14:14,701 --> 00:14:16,471
- Marshall!
- Whoa!
274
00:14:16,428 --> 00:14:18,498
- We gotta talk to you!
- Wait!
275
00:14:18,442 --> 00:14:20,982
You can't stop Marshall
from living his dream.
276
00:14:20,907 --> 00:14:24,047
Sonny, enough!
We heard you the whole ride here.
277
00:14:23,948 --> 00:14:25,748
- Uh-huh.
- Whole ride!
278
00:14:25,713 --> 00:14:27,973
- Blah blah blah.
- Anyways, we have to get Marshall back.
279
00:14:27,919 --> 00:14:30,389
- Before savage stan kills us.
- Us?
280
00:14:30,317 --> 00:14:32,317
Us? Hello!
281
00:14:32,274 --> 00:14:34,734
Temporary wasabi blindness.
282
00:14:34,672 --> 00:14:38,072
You guys, Marshall is having
the time of his life.
283
00:14:37,972 --> 00:14:41,102
You can't just take that away from
him for your own selfish needs.
284
00:14:41,003 --> 00:14:43,173
Do you even know us?
285
00:14:44,399 --> 00:14:47,199
Hi, kids, what are you doing here?
286
00:14:47,123 --> 00:14:48,923
- Oh marshall...
- No no no!
287
00:14:48,878 --> 00:14:51,878
- We just wanted to tell you...
- Tell you how excited we are...
288
00:14:51,794 --> 00:14:54,724
-... About you coming back... -...
Coming back to where you belong:
289
00:14:54,643 --> 00:14:56,503
The theater.
290
00:14:56,466 --> 00:15:00,166
Oh, I know why you kids are here.
291
00:15:00,044 --> 00:15:02,584
You couldn't wait to see the show, huh?
292
00:15:02,509 --> 00:15:05,419
- Nope! - All right, I'm gonna
give you a little preview.
293
00:15:05,329 --> 00:15:07,459
Of "my life with ma"!
Come on.
294
00:15:07,410 --> 00:15:08,440
Sit sit sit sit.
295
00:15:08,437 --> 00:15:10,267
Ooh, it's my first audience.
296
00:15:12,370 --> 00:15:14,270
All right, ready?
297
00:15:14,230 --> 00:15:16,130
Let's start at the very beginning.
298
00:15:16,082 --> 00:15:19,082
Ma meets Marshall.
299
00:15:18,998 --> 00:15:22,298
Waaaah!
300
00:15:22,202 --> 00:15:24,802
It's a boy.
301
00:15:26,230 --> 00:15:28,100
How was my first day of kindergarten?
302
00:15:28,053 --> 00:15:31,593
How do you think it was, ma?
303
00:15:31,477 --> 00:15:33,917
How was my first day of college?
304
00:15:33,846 --> 00:15:37,556
How do you think it was, ma?
305
00:15:37,434 --> 00:15:40,074
♪ because you can't spell Marshall ♪
306
00:15:39,995 --> 00:15:42,025
♪ you can't spell Marshall ♪
307
00:15:41,981 --> 00:15:43,011
♪ you can't, Ahh! ♪
308
00:15:43,007 --> 00:15:44,437
♪ spell Marshall ♪
309
00:15:44,407 --> 00:15:48,777
♪ without ma!
She rocks me to sleep. ♪.
310
00:15:48,638 --> 00:15:50,098
Yeah!
311
00:15:52,734 --> 00:15:54,904
What do you think?
312
00:15:54,844 --> 00:15:57,144
Well...
313
00:15:57,079 --> 00:15:59,689
It's perfect!
I wouldn't change a thing.
314
00:15:59,611 --> 00:16:01,051
That's what I felt.
315
00:16:01,021 --> 00:16:04,221
I'm gonna go tell ma she's wrong.
316
00:16:04,129 --> 00:16:06,399
- Ma!
- No.
317
00:16:06,335 --> 00:16:08,705
What do you mean you
wouldn't change a thing?
318
00:16:08,637 --> 00:16:10,437
That was horrible.
You guys were right.
319
00:16:10,402 --> 00:16:12,632
We have to stop Marshall
from performing the show.
320
00:16:12,580 --> 00:16:16,010
Oh no no no. You were right...
we have to let him perform.
321
00:16:15,908 --> 00:16:18,538
Yeah, the show is so bad
Marshall's gonna bomb.
322
00:16:18,469 --> 00:16:21,169
And then he'll have to
come back to "so random!"
323
00:16:21,088 --> 00:16:23,358
There is no way that
I'm gonna let that happen.
324
00:16:23,304 --> 00:16:24,734
- Get her!
- No... what...
325
00:16:24,704 --> 00:16:26,774
Stop it!
You put me down.
326
00:16:26,728 --> 00:16:29,428
We gonna let it happen.
See, I'm gonna get all gladiator on you,
327
00:16:29,347 --> 00:16:30,917
But I'm gonna do it.
I'm gonna do it.
328
00:16:30,882 --> 00:16:32,752
- Put me down. Stop it.
- Put you down.
329
00:16:34,853 --> 00:16:36,753
- Guys?
- ( Door closes )
330
00:16:36,714 --> 00:16:39,784
Ah, they'll come back for me.
331
00:16:39,687 --> 00:16:43,657
♪ you can't spell Marshall,
you can't spell... ♪.
332
00:16:43,524 --> 00:16:45,464
Guys?
333
00:16:47,179 --> 00:16:48,979
♪ you can't spell Marshall ♪
334
00:16:48,934 --> 00:16:50,574
♪ you can't spell Marshall ♪
335
00:16:50,536 --> 00:16:52,276
♪ aw, you can't spell Marshall ♪
336
00:16:52,234 --> 00:16:54,404
- ♪ without ma. ♪
- ( Knocks )
337
00:16:54,344 --> 00:16:56,784
- Ahem, Marshall?
- Hey!
338
00:16:56,713 --> 00:16:58,613
Hey you.
339
00:16:58,574 --> 00:17:00,804
Look, we gotta talk.
340
00:17:00,752 --> 00:17:02,552
Oh, you're still buzzing about
that little taste.
341
00:17:02,507 --> 00:17:03,977
Of the show I gave you, huh?
342
00:17:03,946 --> 00:17:06,116
Yeah, you know.
I just... I still can't.
343
00:17:06,066 --> 00:17:09,026
Quite shake that taste.
344
00:17:08,944 --> 00:17:11,574
Me neither.
You know, Sonny,
345
00:17:11,505 --> 00:17:13,765
A lot of great things have
happened in this office.
346
00:17:13,711 --> 00:17:16,481
But the best was when you
told me to follow my dream.
347
00:17:16,397 --> 00:17:21,137
Oh. You know, I've been thinking
a lot about dreams lately.
348
00:17:20,982 --> 00:17:24,082
And I realized that,
you know, there's a reason.
349
00:17:23,984 --> 00:17:27,084
Why people call them dreams.
350
00:17:26,996 --> 00:17:30,426
And not realities, you know what I mean?
351
00:17:30,325 --> 00:17:32,025
Oh yeah!
For most people.
352
00:17:31,984 --> 00:17:34,124
Oh, those poor delusional saps.
353
00:17:34,065 --> 00:17:36,875
Look, Marshall,
354
00:17:36,790 --> 00:17:38,920
This is gonna be hard for me to say,
355
00:17:38,871 --> 00:17:40,871
But your show, it just...
356
00:17:40,818 --> 00:17:42,788
Needed a little something.
357
00:17:42,746 --> 00:17:47,046
M-more like a big...
a big something.
358
00:17:46,900 --> 00:17:50,880
Sonny, I'm not stupid. I think I know
where you're going with this thing.
359
00:17:50,746 --> 00:17:52,376
Thank goodness.
360
00:17:52,348 --> 00:17:54,078
I just... I didn't want
to have to say the words.
361
00:17:54,046 --> 00:17:56,876
You don't have to.
Let me say it for you.
362
00:17:56,799 --> 00:17:59,559
You want to be in the show, huh?
363
00:17:59,485 --> 00:18:02,315
- I do? - I knew it!
I knew it.
364
00:18:02,238 --> 00:18:05,238
It may be a one-man show, but my dream
is big enough for the two of us.
365
00:18:05,144 --> 00:18:07,684
Sonny, you are gonna play ma.
366
00:18:07,609 --> 00:18:08,779
What?
367
00:18:08,760 --> 00:18:10,400
Yeah.
368
00:18:16,185 --> 00:18:18,285
♪ I wiped his tush ♪
369
00:18:18,238 --> 00:18:19,868
♪ I cut her meat ♪
370
00:18:19,839 --> 00:18:21,669
♪ I gave him baths ♪
371
00:18:21,633 --> 00:18:23,533
♪ I wash her feet ♪
372
00:18:23,484 --> 00:18:26,484
♪ we work together, we're here forever ♪
373
00:18:26,401 --> 00:18:29,731
♪ you can't spell Marshall,
you can't spell Marshall ♪
374
00:18:29,633 --> 00:18:33,203
♪ you can't spell Marshall
without maaaaa! ♪
375
00:18:33,086 --> 00:18:36,286
♪ she rocks me to sleep. ♪
yeah!
376
00:18:44,415 --> 00:18:48,485
That's odd... that cheering
sounds a lot like booing.
377
00:18:48,357 --> 00:18:50,557
No no, they're not booing.
378
00:18:50,496 --> 00:18:55,836
They're saying, "bo-ooy, that
was a good... " who am I kidding?
379
00:18:55,657 --> 00:18:58,517
Yeah, at least they're not throwing
anything, you know what I mean?
380
00:18:58,438 --> 00:19:01,508
Hey!
Hey, that was Tawni's shoe.
381
00:19:01,412 --> 00:19:03,952
What was I thinking, having a dream?
382
00:19:03,877 --> 00:19:06,007
Get off the stage!
383
00:19:05,959 --> 00:19:07,729
You know what?
You're right.
384
00:19:07,685 --> 00:19:09,955
- I am getting off the stage.
- No...
385
00:19:09,892 --> 00:19:13,392
Oh, and grab my shoe!
386
00:19:13,287 --> 00:19:15,887
Shame on you for booing my boy.
387
00:19:15,810 --> 00:19:17,580
Sit down!
388
00:19:17,546 --> 00:19:21,346
He deserves better than that.
389
00:19:21,220 --> 00:19:23,330
Is this still part of the show?
390
00:19:24,587 --> 00:19:27,557
I'm not sure.
391
00:19:27,464 --> 00:19:30,434
Instead of booing him for his failure,
392
00:19:30,342 --> 00:19:33,012
You should be applauding him.
393
00:19:32,942 --> 00:19:34,842
For his courage...
394
00:19:36,011 --> 00:19:38,781
For taking a chance on his dream.
395
00:19:38,697 --> 00:19:41,997
So let's hear it for my boy.
396
00:19:45,421 --> 00:19:48,551
I said let's hear it for my boy!
397
00:19:48,462 --> 00:19:52,062
Sonny, it's okay.
My dream is over.
398
00:19:51,953 --> 00:19:53,913
Marshall, you told us your dream was.
399
00:19:53,872 --> 00:19:56,272
To do a show and hear
applause and laughter.
400
00:19:57,929 --> 00:20:01,269
You know what? You do that
every week on "so random!"
401
00:20:01,162 --> 00:20:04,902
Without you pushing us to be
our funniest and to do our best,
402
00:20:04,788 --> 00:20:06,718
The show would...
403
00:20:06,668 --> 00:20:08,708
Stink on rice.
404
00:20:09,747 --> 00:20:11,407
See what I did there?
405
00:20:11,378 --> 00:20:13,778
I see what you did there.
406
00:20:13,708 --> 00:20:16,748
That laughter and applause
that you hear every week.
407
00:20:16,653 --> 00:20:19,793
Is just as much for you as it is for us.
408
00:20:19,694 --> 00:20:22,334
I guess I never thought about it that way.
409
00:20:22,255 --> 00:20:25,495
I guess I was already living my dream.
410
00:20:25,392 --> 00:20:29,962
So will you come back
to "so random!"?
411
00:20:29,814 --> 00:20:33,444
Absolutely.
412
00:20:36,183 --> 00:20:37,813
My performing days are over.
413
00:20:37,785 --> 00:20:39,815
Yes!
414
00:20:42,773 --> 00:20:46,373
- Oh man, it's a miracle.
- What?
415
00:20:46,264 --> 00:20:50,434
- You can see?
- No, Marshall's coming back.
416
00:20:53,506 --> 00:20:55,836
Do your eyes feel like they're on fire?
417
00:20:55,741 --> 00:20:57,861
It's burns.
418
00:20:57,775 --> 00:20:59,865
Are you experiencing dry mouth?
419
00:21:00,566 --> 00:21:04,636
Does it feel like you've been smacked
in the face with a giant fluff stick?
420
00:21:04,547 --> 00:21:08,737
Then you are using your Wasabi wrong.
Or using wasabi can lead to...
421
00:21:08,566 --> 00:21:11,166
Itchy Eyes, Cripsy Corneas,
422
00:21:11,060 --> 00:21:12,640
Pyrotechnic Pupils.
423
00:21:12,576 --> 00:21:14,306
Volcanic Throat.
424
00:21:14,235 --> 00:21:15,655
Vomiting.
425
00:21:15,674 --> 00:21:18,154
- And feeling of loneliness.
- Guys?
426
00:21:18,053 --> 00:21:20,793
You need to remember: Wasabi is a food!
427
00:21:20,681 --> 00:21:22,091
Not a face cream!
428
00:21:23,213 --> 00:21:26,033
Wasabi: a little of it is a tasty treat.
429
00:21:25,918 --> 00:21:28,088
But too much of it... does that.
430
00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:30,920
- It's burns!
- Please use wasabi responsably.
431
00:21:30,970 --> 00:21:35,520
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