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1
00:00:02,922 --> 00:00:05,882
You guys, thank you so much
for coming to "'" with me.
2
00:00:05,789 --> 00:00:09,439
- Wasn't it great?
- Sonny, it's a kiddie show.
3
00:00:09,317 --> 00:00:10,947
We were the only people in the audience.
4
00:00:10,919 --> 00:00:12,549
Who weren't dressed by our mommies.
5
00:00:13,536 --> 00:00:15,396
This was even too childish for me.
6
00:00:15,348 --> 00:00:17,808
And I think you know I'm pretty childish.
7
00:00:17,745 --> 00:00:19,435
Yeah, he's like a little boy.
8
00:00:19,404 --> 00:00:21,894
You know what?
You don't understand.
9
00:00:21,830 --> 00:00:24,090
I used to live my life by pauly's pledges.
10
00:00:24,035 --> 00:00:27,755
Always respect your parents.
Always keep a promise.
11
00:00:27,641 --> 00:00:29,801
Ooh, like the fact that you promised.
12
00:00:29,750 --> 00:00:32,740
To pay us $10 for coming to
this stupid show with you?
13
00:00:32,655 --> 00:00:34,485
- Uh-huh.
- Pay up.
14
00:00:34,439 --> 00:00:37,109
Right.
Here's your money.
15
00:00:39,041 --> 00:00:41,971
- Oh hi, Mr. Condor.
- Terri.
16
00:00:41,879 --> 00:00:44,349
Actually, my name's Tawni.
17
00:00:44,276 --> 00:00:47,146
My first wife's name is Tawni
so I'm calling you terri.
18
00:00:47,057 --> 00:00:48,797
Then terri it is.
19
00:00:51,822 --> 00:00:53,922
Nice to see my stars.
20
00:00:53,864 --> 00:00:56,994
Supporting the newest members
of the condor studio family.
21
00:00:56,904 --> 00:01:00,704
- Hey, pauly.
- Hi, Mr. Condor!
22
00:01:00,576 --> 00:01:02,546
Aw, I love that bear.
23
00:01:03,711 --> 00:01:05,781
Oh oh!
There's... there's...
24
00:01:05,725 --> 00:01:08,355
Sonny, it's not a Jonas.
25
00:01:08,285 --> 00:01:10,185
It's just some guy in a bear suit.
26
00:01:10,136 --> 00:01:12,036
La la la la la la la la la!
27
00:01:11,986 --> 00:01:14,686
Look, just girl up and go talk to him.
28
00:01:14,613 --> 00:01:16,773
I... I can't.
29
00:01:16,723 --> 00:01:18,183
I'm too nervous.
30
00:01:18,161 --> 00:01:19,791
Pauly means everything to me.
31
00:01:19,762 --> 00:01:22,522
I used to watch him every
single day as a kid.
32
00:01:22,447 --> 00:01:23,977
All right.
Well, just relax.
33
00:01:23,943 --> 00:01:26,083
We'll all go with you
to pauly's dressing room.
34
00:01:26,023 --> 00:01:28,793
And we'll introduce you
to your childhood hero.
35
00:01:28,708 --> 00:01:31,178
- You guys would do that?
- Yeah.
36
00:01:31,105 --> 00:01:33,205
For another 10 bucks.
37
00:01:33,157 --> 00:01:35,057
- You guys are the best.
- Uh-huh.
38
00:01:36,570 --> 00:01:37,910
Stop it.
39
00:01:37,884 --> 00:01:39,514
Okay, you can keep your money.
40
00:01:39,485 --> 00:01:41,115
Just don't make me go in there.
41
00:01:41,086 --> 00:01:43,986
- Hey, look!
- What?
42
00:01:46,839 --> 00:01:49,639
♪ off to the races, I'm going places ♪
43
00:01:49,553 --> 00:01:52,523
♪ might be a long shot,
not gonna waste it ♪
44
00:01:52,429 --> 00:01:57,139
♪ this is the big break
and it's calling my name ♪
45
00:01:56,974 --> 00:01:59,274
♪ yeah ♪
46
00:01:59,208 --> 00:02:02,108
♪ so far, so great, get with it ♪
47
00:02:02,027 --> 00:02:04,987
♪ at least that's how I see it ♪
48
00:02:04,904 --> 00:02:08,704
♪ having a dream is just the beginning ♪
49
00:02:08,576 --> 00:02:11,446
♪ so far, so great, believe it ♪
50
00:02:11,366 --> 00:02:14,396
♪ can't take away this feeling ♪
51
00:02:14,300 --> 00:02:17,100
♪ taking a ride, chance on my side ♪
52
00:02:17,023 --> 00:02:19,353
♪ yeah, I can't wait ♪
53
00:02:19,296 --> 00:02:23,856
♪ so far, so great, so far, so great ♪
54
00:02:23,706 --> 00:02:26,906
♪ ba ba da da-da,
ba da da da-da ♪
55
00:02:26,803 --> 00:02:29,743
♪ ba ba da da-da,
ba da da da-da ♪
56
00:02:29,651 --> 00:02:31,691
♪ yow! ♪.
57
00:02:33,582 --> 00:02:36,022
You can keep your money.
Just don't make me go in there.
58
00:02:35,950 --> 00:02:38,490
- Hey, look!
- What?
59
00:02:41,234 --> 00:02:42,464
Hi.
60
00:02:42,442 --> 00:02:44,042
Well, hello there.
61
00:02:44,014 --> 00:02:47,014
So where's my little pauly pal.
62
00:02:46,919 --> 00:02:49,119
Who wants pauly's pawtograph?
63
00:02:49,058 --> 00:02:51,458
Actually, that would be me.
64
00:02:51,397 --> 00:02:53,697
So there's nobody here over age six.
65
00:02:53,631 --> 00:02:58,001
With a cell phone
or any kind of recording device?
66
00:02:57,860 --> 00:02:59,760
Nope.
Just me.
67
00:02:59,710 --> 00:03:01,410
Oh, finally!
68
00:03:01,369 --> 00:03:04,169
Gah!
There's a person in there!
69
00:03:04,092 --> 00:03:05,462
Hi.
I'm Hank.
70
00:03:05,434 --> 00:03:08,334
La la la la la la la la la!
71
00:03:08,244 --> 00:03:09,984
You've got to be kidding me.
72
00:03:09,941 --> 00:03:11,211
Aren't you a little old for this?
73
00:03:11,187 --> 00:03:13,987
Is anybody ever too old for pauly?
74
00:03:13,910 --> 00:03:15,470
Yeah, me.
75
00:03:15,444 --> 00:03:17,114
Never thought this gig would last 25 years.
76
00:03:19,443 --> 00:03:21,513
You're not gonna leave till
I sign your photo, are you?
77
00:03:23,949 --> 00:03:26,349
- Fine. What's your...
- My name is Sonny.
78
00:03:29,769 --> 00:03:31,799
Dear Sonny,
79
00:03:31,754 --> 00:03:33,754
Pauly loves you beary beary much.
80
00:03:33,700 --> 00:03:36,240
Rainbow, smiley faces.
81
00:03:36,165 --> 00:03:39,035
Blah blah blah blah blah and a paw print.
82
00:03:41,889 --> 00:03:45,989
I imagined this moment much differently.
83
00:03:45,858 --> 00:03:48,888
I think somebody's forgetting
pauly pledge #17...
84
00:03:48,792 --> 00:03:50,262
We're done here!
85
00:03:50,240 --> 00:03:52,200
No. Wait.
86
00:03:52,158 --> 00:03:54,188
Pauly pledge #17 is:
87
00:03:54,143 --> 00:03:56,603
Mind your peas and carrots.
88
00:03:56,540 --> 00:03:58,500
You're a regular superfan.
Wow.
89
00:03:58,457 --> 00:04:00,857
Yeah, you have no idea.
90
00:04:02,043 --> 00:04:03,873
In fact, um,
91
00:04:03,827 --> 00:04:06,397
Can I just ask you for one more thing?
92
00:04:06,329 --> 00:04:08,029
And then I promise I'll go.
93
00:04:07,988 --> 00:04:11,128
Look at me.
I'm pauly!
94
00:04:12,878 --> 00:04:15,548
You know, I would've let
you do this for five.
95
00:04:15,476 --> 00:04:17,606
♪ p is for patience ♪
96
00:04:17,557 --> 00:04:21,387
♪ a is for a-okay! ♪
97
00:04:21,268 --> 00:04:23,128
- ♪ u is for... ♪ - You are
disturbingly good at that.
98
00:04:23,089 --> 00:04:25,489
You'd make an excellent pauly.
99
00:04:25,419 --> 00:04:28,289
- Really? - In fact, how
would you like to be pauly.
100
00:04:28,210 --> 00:04:31,110
And give your friend Hank a chance to spend.
101
00:04:31,019 --> 00:04:33,419
- His ten-spot.
- Oh my gosh!
102
00:04:33,359 --> 00:04:35,159
Oh my gosh!
Oh my gosh!
103
00:04:35,113 --> 00:04:36,983
Oh my gosh, I can't.
104
00:04:36,935 --> 00:04:38,305
I've got plans with my boyfriend tomorrow.
105
00:04:38,287 --> 00:04:39,747
All right, out of the suit.
106
00:04:39,725 --> 00:04:40,785
- Come on, out of the suit.
- What? No.
107
00:04:40,780 --> 00:04:43,180
No. Mine.
No no. I'll do it.
108
00:04:43,110 --> 00:04:45,410
Congratulations.
Consider yourself.
109
00:04:45,353 --> 00:04:47,153
A bear.
110
00:04:47,108 --> 00:04:49,608
I feel like I'm being crowned
the queen of the north pole.
111
00:04:52,679 --> 00:04:54,309
Wow.
112
00:04:54,270 --> 00:04:56,840
North pole kind of smells
like a High School gym.
113
00:05:00,925 --> 00:05:03,465
Anyways, I just need to push
back our date for an hour.
114
00:05:03,389 --> 00:05:05,529
Happy seven-weekiversary.
115
00:05:07,646 --> 00:05:09,716
Oh, just be happy for me.
116
00:05:09,660 --> 00:05:11,700
Hello, class.
117
00:05:11,644 --> 00:05:13,574
Hello, Ms. Bitterman.
118
00:05:13,533 --> 00:05:16,103
Did everyone read the nine chapters.
119
00:05:16,026 --> 00:05:17,756
On American history?
120
00:05:17,723 --> 00:05:19,623
- Up all night.
- Yes.
121
00:05:19,574 --> 00:05:21,444
Well, good for you.
122
00:05:21,396 --> 00:05:24,536
- We're not doing that.
- The one time I read.
123
00:05:24,435 --> 00:05:27,045
Instead we're going to be
having a little pop quiz.
124
00:05:29,392 --> 00:05:31,432
A certain red-headed lady.
125
00:05:31,377 --> 00:05:33,047
Has a gentleman caller.
126
00:05:33,007 --> 00:05:35,447
That makes her feel like she's 39 again.
127
00:05:35,375 --> 00:05:38,945
This is about to get weird.
128
00:05:38,837 --> 00:05:43,067
How long should this wonderful
independent spirit wait.
129
00:05:42,931 --> 00:05:45,691
Before introducing this man to her.
130
00:05:45,616 --> 00:05:47,846
Cat?
131
00:05:47,792 --> 00:05:49,592
And there's the weird.
132
00:05:49,547 --> 00:05:52,087
Don't tell me you're getting ready.
133
00:05:52,011 --> 00:05:53,881
To introduce him
to Dr. Mittens.
134
00:05:54,791 --> 00:05:56,261
And there's the weirdest.
135
00:05:56,230 --> 00:05:58,740
How do you know so much about her cat?
136
00:05:58,665 --> 00:06:01,265
I'm a listener.
137
00:06:01,196 --> 00:06:04,426
Ooh. Dr. Mittens.
This is serious.
138
00:06:04,332 --> 00:06:07,992
Sounds like it's time for Dr.
Mittens and your gentleman caller to meet.
139
00:06:07,879 --> 00:06:09,549
You're right!
140
00:06:09,509 --> 00:06:11,909
No you're not.
What if he's not ready?
141
00:06:11,849 --> 00:06:14,809
No, this is too risky.
It's too risky!
142
00:06:14,725 --> 00:06:17,425
Come on.
He's a grown man.
143
00:06:17,343 --> 00:06:19,843
I'm talking about
Dr. Mittens!
144
00:06:19,778 --> 00:06:23,178
He's been hurt before
and he's no spring kitten.
145
00:06:23,067 --> 00:06:24,707
His life's not perfect.
146
00:06:24,668 --> 00:06:26,868
Like my sister who married a dentist.
147
00:06:26,816 --> 00:06:28,616
And has a pool that's not
made out of plastic.
148
00:06:28,571 --> 00:06:30,571
And sits in the front yard.
149
00:06:32,377 --> 00:06:35,217
I never thought I'd say this,
but can we please study now?
150
00:06:42,388 --> 00:06:44,458
Oh, look at all the pauly pals!
151
00:06:44,411 --> 00:06:46,011
This is gonna be so great.
152
00:06:45,974 --> 00:06:48,574
Here's your head.
Break a paw.
153
00:06:48,505 --> 00:06:50,935
- I'm out of here.
- Thanks. Oh, don't forget
154
00:06:50,864 --> 00:06:53,004
I have a date with my boyfriend in one hour.
155
00:06:52,944 --> 00:06:54,944
- To celebrate... - I know, I know.
Young love.
156
00:06:54,900 --> 00:06:56,360
It's beautiful.
157
00:07:01,037 --> 00:07:03,637
Hank.
158
00:07:03,568 --> 00:07:06,738
What are you doing? There's a line of
kids out there waiting to see you.
159
00:07:06,636 --> 00:07:09,836
And I can't wait
to meet them, Mr. Condor.
160
00:07:09,743 --> 00:07:12,813
That's the spirit you're
contractually obligated to have!
161
00:07:12,715 --> 00:07:14,615
Have fun!
162
00:07:14,575 --> 00:07:18,835
Hey, kids, who's ready to
meet pauly the polar bear?
163
00:07:21,412 --> 00:07:24,222
Hello, all my pauly pals!
164
00:07:25,448 --> 00:07:27,248
Ahh!
165
00:07:27,203 --> 00:07:30,143
Oh, look at that!
166
00:07:30,051 --> 00:07:32,951
Pauly's being smothered with love.
167
00:07:40,483 --> 00:07:42,413
Dude, how you gonna call a time out?
168
00:07:42,372 --> 00:07:44,502
- Oh, you know how I do.
- What?!
169
00:07:46,274 --> 00:07:48,904
Flowers?
Oh dude, you shouldn't have.
170
00:07:48,834 --> 00:07:50,494
Oh!
171
00:07:50,464 --> 00:07:52,094
Dude, I didn't.
They're for sunny.
172
00:07:52,065 --> 00:07:54,595
It's our
seven-weekiversary.
173
00:07:54,520 --> 00:07:57,330
I'm taking her to Chez schwerman.
174
00:07:57,243 --> 00:08:00,273
- And yet she's not here.
- Hmm.
175
00:08:00,187 --> 00:08:03,017
Blow off!
176
00:08:04,214 --> 00:08:06,954
- Impossible.
- Blow off...
177
00:08:06,870 --> 00:08:09,740
Denial!
178
00:08:09,650 --> 00:08:13,260
Dude, you might want to sit down
because you've been stood up.
179
00:08:14,809 --> 00:08:16,739
You guys don't know
what you're talking about.
180
00:08:16,688 --> 00:08:20,928
Then again, you do get blown
off by girls all the time.
181
00:08:20,782 --> 00:08:23,082
Not true.
182
00:08:23,026 --> 00:08:24,956
I don't even get that far.
183
00:08:27,091 --> 00:08:30,321
Well, I do.
And this has all the signs.
184
00:08:30,217 --> 00:08:31,857
Of a girl losing interest in you.
185
00:08:31,818 --> 00:08:33,558
It happens in stages.
186
00:08:33,515 --> 00:08:35,585
Stage one:
You're blown off.
187
00:08:35,529 --> 00:08:39,069
Stage two: They stop
answering your phone calls.
188
00:08:38,952 --> 00:08:40,822
- Mm-hmm.
- Or so I've been told.
189
00:08:40,774 --> 00:08:42,544
- Well, I told you that.
- Yeah, you did.
190
00:08:46,699 --> 00:08:48,399
No cell phones at the meet and greet.
191
00:08:48,358 --> 00:08:52,058
Which is why pauly is turning it off.
192
00:08:57,256 --> 00:08:59,286
Voicemail.
193
00:08:59,231 --> 00:09:01,471
- How many rings?
- Two.
194
00:09:01,408 --> 00:09:04,118
Ooh.
195
00:09:04,063 --> 00:09:06,803
- Two means she heard it...
- Saw who it was...
196
00:09:06,719 --> 00:09:09,019
- Thought about it...
- And turned the phone off.
197
00:09:08,963 --> 00:09:11,493
Because she's not...
198
00:09:11,427 --> 00:09:15,697
Interested.
199
00:09:17,123 --> 00:09:18,183
I can't believe this.
200
00:09:19,683 --> 00:09:22,183
- Join us, Chad.
- Yes, Chad.
201
00:09:22,109 --> 00:09:25,419
Join us. Join the dateless
world of online gaming.
202
00:09:26,721 --> 00:09:28,551
- No, never.
- Oh!
203
00:09:31,965 --> 00:09:34,065
Here's your pawtograph, little girl.
204
00:09:35,321 --> 00:09:37,721
Where's Hank?
205
00:09:37,661 --> 00:09:41,361
Hey kids, who wants to see
pauly dislocate his shoulder?
206
00:09:41,237 --> 00:09:43,737
Yay!
207
00:09:43,673 --> 00:09:46,043
It doesn't even hurt.
208
00:09:48,150 --> 00:09:51,380
Ooh ooh, my arm's made of rubber.
209
00:09:56,204 --> 00:09:58,274
Hello?
210
00:09:58,218 --> 00:10:01,188
I'm missing my anniversary?
Where are you?
211
00:10:01,104 --> 00:10:02,864
Well, I'll tell you where I'm not...
212
00:10:02,830 --> 00:10:04,560
In a wet bear suit.
213
00:10:04,527 --> 00:10:06,457
When are you coming back?
214
00:10:06,406 --> 00:10:10,046
Oh, probably about, uh, never!
215
00:10:09,925 --> 00:10:11,595
What?!
216
00:10:14,125 --> 00:10:15,725
So let me get this straight...
217
00:10:15,697 --> 00:10:17,827
Hey, Mr. Condor,
I have to ask you something.
218
00:10:17,778 --> 00:10:19,808
Just a sec, pauly.
219
00:10:19,753 --> 00:10:21,563
I'm talking to my pal pepe here.
220
00:10:21,517 --> 00:10:24,687
- Oh. - So you filled
in for your friend.
221
00:10:24,586 --> 00:10:26,726
While his wife had a baby?
222
00:10:26,666 --> 00:10:30,536
Oh, isn't friendship
just a wonderful thing?
223
00:10:30,406 --> 00:10:32,576
Yes it is.
224
00:10:32,515 --> 00:10:35,325
You're fired, your friend is fired,
225
00:10:35,238 --> 00:10:37,868
And when the baby turns 18,
the baby is fired.
226
00:10:38,824 --> 00:10:40,354
Nobody fills in for anyone here.
227
00:10:40,320 --> 00:10:42,290
Without checking with me first.
228
00:10:42,247 --> 00:10:44,647
Now why don't you just March
your little happy feet.
229
00:10:44,577 --> 00:10:46,477
Down to the unemployment office?
230
00:10:52,545 --> 00:10:54,505
- What do you want?
- Huh? Oh.
231
00:10:54,463 --> 00:10:57,063
Uh, yeah, I was just wondering.
232
00:10:56,984 --> 00:10:58,754
If you wanted to go in on a baby gift.
233
00:10:58,720 --> 00:11:01,120
For pepe's friend...
234
00:11:01,050 --> 00:11:03,420
But I guess not.
235
00:11:03,351 --> 00:11:05,491
You've got five minutes.
236
00:11:05,432 --> 00:11:07,802
Then I want you back out
there with the kids.
237
00:11:15,538 --> 00:11:17,708
Hi, hanky-wanky.
238
00:11:17,657 --> 00:11:20,157
Oh ho ho.
239
00:11:22,230 --> 00:11:25,230
I'm not hanky-wanky.
I'm pauly-wauly.
240
00:11:25,135 --> 00:11:27,505
Ooh, I like this game.
241
00:11:29,488 --> 00:11:32,058
You know what? Pauly finds this
game a little uncomfortable.
242
00:11:31,981 --> 00:11:34,321
Oh, I know you're at work,
243
00:11:34,254 --> 00:11:35,854
But I couldn't wait any longer.
244
00:11:35,826 --> 00:11:37,526
I brought someone special by.
245
00:11:37,485 --> 00:11:40,085
To meet the other furry guy in my life.
246
00:11:41,742 --> 00:11:43,872
Okay, you sneezed.
247
00:11:43,823 --> 00:11:46,183
That doesn't necessarily
mean you're allergic.
248
00:11:46,124 --> 00:11:48,454
It must just be dusty in that head.
249
00:11:48,396 --> 00:11:51,326
- Oh! Sonny!
- Sorry.
250
00:11:51,244 --> 00:11:54,214
Oh. Well, this is
embarrassing.
251
00:11:56,010 --> 00:11:57,640
There's nothing to be embarrassed
about, Ms. Bitterman.
252
00:11:57,611 --> 00:11:59,811
I'm not talking about me.
I'm talking about you.
253
00:11:59,749 --> 00:12:02,989
I'm just introducing a cat to a polar bear.
Nothing weird about that.
254
00:12:02,884 --> 00:12:05,024
Where's Hank?
255
00:12:04,965 --> 00:12:08,735
Wait.
Hank is the Hank.
256
00:12:08,608 --> 00:12:10,578
In the hanky-wanky?
257
00:12:10,526 --> 00:12:12,596
And he had an appointment.
258
00:12:12,549 --> 00:12:16,249
With Dr. Mittens, which clearly,
he's chosen not to keep.
259
00:12:16,126 --> 00:12:18,526
This is
a cat-tastrophe.
260
00:12:20,929 --> 00:12:22,689
I just hate my life.
261
00:12:25,982 --> 00:12:28,522
Five minutes are up.
Let's go!
262
00:12:28,447 --> 00:12:30,947
I'm on my way.
263
00:12:34,046 --> 00:12:36,216
I hate my life.
264
00:12:42,465 --> 00:12:44,225
Wait wait wait.
No. She's coming.
265
00:12:44,190 --> 00:12:48,290
She's coming. 'S traffic
and wardrobe problems.
266
00:12:49,598 --> 00:12:53,768
No show!
267
00:12:53,625 --> 00:12:55,695
Worse than we thought.
268
00:12:55,639 --> 00:12:59,649
- Dating an imaginary woman.
- Oh, been there.
269
00:12:59,512 --> 00:13:02,012
Hey hey!
270
00:13:01,948 --> 00:13:04,878
You're wrong and you're...
you're weird.
271
00:13:04,786 --> 00:13:06,796
You both have to leave.
I'm on a date.
272
00:13:06,742 --> 00:13:08,812
- Go.
- Are you, Chad?
273
00:13:08,756 --> 00:13:10,426
Are you really?
274
00:13:10,386 --> 00:13:12,726
See, I'm...
275
00:13:12,658 --> 00:13:13,958
... not an expert at these things,
276
00:13:13,943 --> 00:13:15,913
But I believe a date involves two people.
277
00:13:15,860 --> 00:13:17,860
In a romantical situation.
278
00:13:25,238 --> 00:13:27,738
I can't believe this.
This isn't traffic.
279
00:13:27,664 --> 00:13:30,334
There's no wardrobe problems.
I've been stood up.
280
00:13:30,252 --> 00:13:32,592
There's a way to make
the pain go away, Chad.
281
00:13:32,525 --> 00:13:34,395
Join us.
282
00:13:34,356 --> 00:13:37,056
Yes, Chad.
Join us.
283
00:13:36,974 --> 00:13:39,574
You could be player three.
284
00:13:39,505 --> 00:13:41,435
Three.
285
00:13:41,394 --> 00:13:43,894
- Shiny.
- I can see myself.
286
00:13:43,820 --> 00:13:45,860
- Touch it.
- Ah! Never!
287
00:13:48,010 --> 00:13:49,750
Oh hey, Chad, can we have your
288
00:13:49,707 --> 00:13:54,847
salad?
289
00:14:11,396 --> 00:14:13,596
Ah!
290
00:14:13,543 --> 00:14:15,103
What are you doing here?
291
00:14:15,077 --> 00:14:17,877
Uh, I'm not turning my essay in late,
292
00:14:17,791 --> 00:14:20,201
If that's what you're asking.
293
00:14:20,130 --> 00:14:22,900
- What are you doing here?
- I'm not sitting here weeping in the dark.
294
00:14:22,815 --> 00:14:26,685
Over my disastrous love life,
if that's what you're implying.
295
00:14:26,564 --> 00:14:29,894
No. I meant why are you
here petting a cat carrier?
296
00:14:32,317 --> 00:14:35,087
Why should Dr. Mittens
enjoy human touch.
297
00:14:35,002 --> 00:14:36,602
If I can't?
298
00:14:36,574 --> 00:14:39,904
Hanky-nky ran away.
299
00:14:39,806 --> 00:14:41,976
And he'll come back another day?
300
00:14:43,967 --> 00:14:47,557
I'm sorry. I don't know
that nursery rhyme.
301
00:14:47,447 --> 00:14:49,307
I think I scared him off.
302
00:14:49,269 --> 00:14:50,999
Wanting him to meet
Dr. Mittens.
303
00:14:50,966 --> 00:14:53,626
Oh, you've got to help me!
304
00:14:53,555 --> 00:14:59,395
Well, I'm not quite sure what I can do.
305
00:15:01,389 --> 00:15:03,929
There's a "c" in it for you.
306
00:15:04,975 --> 00:15:06,945
Make it a "c+"
307
00:15:06,892 --> 00:15:08,622
And you got yourself
a hanky-wanky.
308
00:15:10,315 --> 00:15:11,975
Shut up, mittens!
309
00:15:11,945 --> 00:15:14,745
You've got nine lives!
Let me have one!
310
00:15:16,902 --> 00:15:20,072
Okay.
311
00:15:19,971 --> 00:15:24,311
Here you go.
Pauly's last autograph for the day.
312
00:15:29,895 --> 00:15:32,125
I think I've got pawthritis.
313
00:15:32,062 --> 00:15:34,272
- Pauly?
- Mr. Condor?
314
00:15:38,236 --> 00:15:41,006
Pauly, before you leave, there's
one more kid you've got to see.
315
00:15:40,931 --> 00:15:44,391
But pauly's supposed to be
off the clock now.
316
00:15:44,287 --> 00:15:46,157
Just do it.
317
00:15:49,886 --> 00:15:52,546
- Hi, pauly.
- Oh boy.
318
00:15:53,597 --> 00:15:55,627
I've been a fan of yours forever.
319
00:15:55,572 --> 00:15:58,082
- Seriously?
- Yeah, I know what you're thinking.
320
00:15:58,007 --> 00:16:00,977
"Chad's cool.
Chad plays by his own rules.
321
00:16:00,884 --> 00:16:02,754
- Chad's awesome."
- Is this going somewhere?
322
00:16:02,706 --> 00:16:04,576
Why don't we sit down and talk about it?
323
00:16:04,537 --> 00:16:06,537
- Yeah, no, I can't really...
- No, really, it's fine.
324
00:16:06,483 --> 00:16:09,123
- I got to go to the little bear's room.
- Sit on down.
325
00:16:09,043 --> 00:16:11,413
You can hold it.
326
00:16:11,345 --> 00:16:13,645
Ooh, did someone just spill
something on your lap?
327
00:16:13,588 --> 00:16:16,388
Not just somebody...
everybody.
328
00:16:16,302 --> 00:16:19,902
- Yeah, are we done here?
- No, let's get back to me.
329
00:16:19,792 --> 00:16:23,262
Well, when I was a kid
and I was having a problem
330
00:16:23,148 --> 00:16:25,648
I would always think,
331
00:16:25,583 --> 00:16:27,483
what would pauly do?
332
00:16:27,434 --> 00:16:30,474
Don't you have someone else you can ask?
333
00:16:30,377 --> 00:16:32,847
Somebody human?
334
00:16:32,774 --> 00:16:38,544
- Possibly a girlfriend?
- That's the problem, pauly.
335
00:16:38,345 --> 00:16:41,415
Today's our seven-weekiversary
and she totally blew me off.
336
00:16:41,317 --> 00:16:43,217
I don't think she wants to see me anymore.
337
00:16:43,178 --> 00:16:46,108
- That's not true.
- I think it is.
338
00:16:47,943 --> 00:16:49,543
I don't know what to do.
339
00:16:49,506 --> 00:16:51,206
Ah! Sonny!
Whoa.
340
00:16:51,174 --> 00:16:52,704
No it's not.
341
00:16:52,670 --> 00:16:56,310
Uh, all that stuff
I told you, I was kidding.
342
00:16:56,189 --> 00:16:57,859
Of course you were.
343
00:16:57,819 --> 00:16:59,789
Stop that.
Why are you in that suit?
344
00:16:59,746 --> 00:17:01,606
Chad, I'm so sorry.
345
00:17:01,568 --> 00:17:04,468
I promised the guy that
I'd be pauly for an hour.
346
00:17:04,377 --> 00:17:05,817
And then he never came back.
347
00:17:05,787 --> 00:17:08,127
So now I'm stuck in this suit being pauly.
348
00:17:08,059 --> 00:17:11,259
And I smell like the inside
of a man's sock.
349
00:17:11,166 --> 00:17:13,696
Well, that's a relief.
Nico and Grady had me convinced.
350
00:17:13,620 --> 00:17:15,160
That you weren't into me anymore.
351
00:17:15,126 --> 00:17:18,466
You were taking girl advice
from Nico and Grady?
352
00:17:18,357 --> 00:17:21,397
It's called hitting rock bottom, Sonny.
353
00:17:21,300 --> 00:17:25,000
Aww, that's the saddest and
sweetest thing I've ever heard.
354
00:17:24,886 --> 00:17:28,156
Almost as sad and sweet
as you coming to pauly.
355
00:17:28,051 --> 00:17:29,921
For advice on our relationship.
356
00:17:29,872 --> 00:17:31,812
I knew it was you in there.
357
00:17:32,979 --> 00:17:36,509
You know what?
Hank needs to be in here.
358
00:17:36,402 --> 00:17:40,672
Whenever there's a little
girl or boy in need or...
359
00:17:40,525 --> 00:17:42,325
Or a big boy...
360
00:17:42,289 --> 00:17:46,689
- Stop that.
-... Pauly needs to be there.
361
00:17:46,537 --> 00:17:48,907
We're spending our anniversary
tracking down that jerk, aren't we?
362
00:17:48,847 --> 00:17:51,347
Yeah. We need to find a way to
get me out of this costume,
363
00:17:51,273 --> 00:17:53,443
Hank back into this costume.
364
00:17:53,392 --> 00:17:55,852
And this is gonna require you
being in a different costume.
365
00:17:55,789 --> 00:17:58,819
What?
366
00:17:58,733 --> 00:18:00,803
Never question pauly.
367
00:18:00,746 --> 00:18:02,976
You are disturbingly good at that.
368
00:18:02,923 --> 00:18:04,453
I know.
369
00:18:10,757 --> 00:18:13,397
I like this place, Carl.
370
00:18:13,317 --> 00:18:16,117
Finally people in costumes
making my dreams come true.
371
00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:22,170
- You!
- You?
372
00:18:22,109 --> 00:18:23,879
How'd you find me?
373
00:18:23,835 --> 00:18:26,105
I found this in pauly's pocket.
374
00:18:26,050 --> 00:18:28,310
Along with a deck of cards.
375
00:18:28,255 --> 00:18:30,285
And a human tooth.
376
00:18:30,240 --> 00:18:32,300
Cards aren't mine.
377
00:18:34,142 --> 00:18:35,872
Hank, you can't quit being pauly.
378
00:18:35,839 --> 00:18:37,069
Think of the kids.
379
00:18:37,057 --> 00:18:38,917
I am.
That's why I quit.
380
00:18:38,879 --> 00:18:40,849
Now scram.
You're harshing my smoothie.
381
00:18:40,797 --> 00:18:43,797
But you can't quit being pauly.
382
00:18:43,711 --> 00:18:45,841
If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't
have dropped out of school.
383
00:18:45,782 --> 00:18:47,752
To become Harry the hot dog.
384
00:18:47,710 --> 00:18:51,810
See, Hank, you don't just inspire kids.
385
00:18:51,670 --> 00:18:54,340
Apparently, I also inspire
bad life decisions.
386
00:18:54,258 --> 00:18:57,638
I bet your parents are very proud.
387
00:18:57,528 --> 00:18:59,828
I think you should leave
my parents out of this.
388
00:18:59,772 --> 00:19:02,642
Um, Harry,
389
00:19:02,552 --> 00:19:04,392
Remember why you're here...
390
00:19:04,345 --> 00:19:07,685
To tell Hank how much pauly means to you.
391
00:19:07,577 --> 00:19:12,217
Not until he apologizes for
bringing my parents into this.
392
00:19:12,054 --> 00:19:15,154
Beat it, meathead, unless you
want a swift kick in the bun.
393
00:19:15,065 --> 00:19:16,995
You know what?
That's not very paulylike.
394
00:19:16,944 --> 00:19:18,814
Yeah, but it's very hanklike.
You picked the wrong fight.
395
00:19:18,776 --> 00:19:20,376
And the wrong smoothie, hot bun boy.
396
00:19:20,338 --> 00:19:23,308
Bring it, 'cause this dog is steamed!
397
00:19:23,215 --> 00:19:25,055
- Come on, bring it!
- You guys!
398
00:19:25,008 --> 00:19:26,908
You guys need to back up, back up!
399
00:19:26,868 --> 00:19:29,068
All right?
Stop it, stop it, Chad!
400
00:19:29,006 --> 00:19:31,646
You know this beef stick?
401
00:19:31,566 --> 00:19:34,106
Yeah, this beef stick here is my boyfriend.
402
00:19:35,440 --> 00:19:37,980
We're spending our anniversary.
403
00:19:37,904 --> 00:19:39,404
Trying to remind you
of how important pauly is.
404
00:19:39,371 --> 00:19:41,481
Aw, you're real romantic, aren't you?
405
00:19:41,423 --> 00:19:43,153
Bet you got that from your parents,
406
00:19:43,120 --> 00:19:44,920
Maybe your daddy, Chaddy.
407
00:19:44,875 --> 00:19:47,275
Do not bring dad Dylan Cooper into this!
408
00:19:47,214 --> 00:19:49,084
It doesn't matter what we're doing.
409
00:19:49,036 --> 00:19:51,836
The important thing is that
we're doing it together.
410
00:19:51,759 --> 00:19:54,059
Like pauly pledge 14 says:
411
00:19:53,993 --> 00:19:55,693
You're never alone.
412
00:19:55,662 --> 00:19:57,162
Aww.
413
00:19:57,129 --> 00:20:00,269
Wow. You kids really
take this stuff seriously.
414
00:20:00,168 --> 00:20:03,338
Not just us.
Millions of other kids do too.
415
00:20:03,246 --> 00:20:06,076
I forgot how much this pauly
stuff means to people.
416
00:20:05,998 --> 00:20:08,698
So you'll go back to being pauly?
417
00:20:08,615 --> 00:20:11,755
Yeah, I guess being
a big furry toilet's tough,
418
00:20:11,655 --> 00:20:13,525
But it's a living.
419
00:20:13,477 --> 00:20:15,747
Besides the kids need me.
420
00:20:15,682 --> 00:20:17,722
They're not the only ones.
421
00:20:17,667 --> 00:20:19,067
Go ahead,
Ms. Bitterman.
422
00:20:19,047 --> 00:20:21,647
Give me my "c+" and go get your man.
423
00:20:21,569 --> 00:20:24,479
- Oh, Hank.
- Joy, I'm so glad you're here.
424
00:20:24,388 --> 00:20:26,988
These kids made me realize
I don't want to be alone.
425
00:20:26,919 --> 00:20:29,179
Is that Dr. Mittens
in there?
426
00:20:29,125 --> 00:20:30,955
Are you ready to meet him?
427
00:20:30,918 --> 00:20:33,018
Let's take this to the next level, baby.
428
00:20:33,957 --> 00:20:35,417
Come on, Dr. Mittens.
429
00:20:35,395 --> 00:20:37,495
There's someone I want you to meet.
430
00:20:41,791 --> 00:20:44,991
Yeah, I don't think this is gonna work out.
431
00:20:47,965 --> 00:20:51,335
But I think this will.
432
00:20:57,017 --> 00:21:00,327
Uh, this isn't gonna
affect my grade, is it?
433
00:21:08,523 --> 00:21:11,193
Hard to believe this is our seventh week.
434
00:21:11,112 --> 00:21:12,182
Feels just like our fifth.
435
00:21:12,166 --> 00:21:13,836
Aw, in here?
436
00:21:13,796 --> 00:21:15,796
- No, in here.
- Me too.
437
00:21:15,752 --> 00:21:17,382
You feeling what I'm feeling?
438
00:21:17,353 --> 00:21:19,053
Gas station Sushi all over again.
439
00:21:20,805 --> 00:21:22,835
Been looking all over for this.
440
00:21:22,790 --> 00:21:25,560
No no no no no! Oh.
441
00:21:27,680 --> 00:21:30,550
Oh boy.
442
00:21:30,600 --> 00:21:35,150
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