Original subtitles

>> BL-BL-BL-BL-BL YEAH!

>> [PANTING]

>> ED, BEHAVE.

>> HA HA HA.

>> SHH!

>> [YAWN] [POP]

[TICKING SLOWLY]

[BELL RINGS]

[WHISTLE BLOWS]

>> LISTEN UP.

HERE'S THE PLAN.

WE'RE BUSTING OUT OF THIS JOINT.

>> BUSTING OUT?

>> YEAH, BUSTING OUT.

I'VE HAD IT WITH THIS SCHOOL STUFF.

GRAMMAR WHO'S-ITS, MATH WHAT'S-ITS, SCIENCE, SOCIAL

STUDIES, GEOGRAPHY.

WHO CARES?!

>> LOOK SHARP.

TEACHER, GUYS.

[WHISTLE BLOWS] >> [GRUNTING]

[WHISTLE BLOWS] >> [GRUNTING]

>> OK.

HERE'S WHAT WE'RE GONNA DO.

WHEN THE TEACHER TURNS AROUND...

WE MAKE A RUN FOR IT.

>> YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS!

>> SHH.

>> THERE ARE SEVERE CONSEQUENCES TO...SKIPPING SCHOOL.

>> YEAH, EDDY.

THE SCHOOL WILL TELL SARAH, AND SARAH WILL TELL MOM, AND MOM

WILL TELL DAD, AND DAD WILL JUST SIT THERE AND WATCH TV!

>> BUT JUST THINK OF IT, LUMPY.

ALL DAY: MONSTER MOVIES, COMICS, AND ALL THE GRAVY YOU CAN

STOMACH.

[SQUEAKING] [DING]

>> IT'S TOTALLY WORTH IT, DOUBLE D!

[WHISTLE BLOWS] >> OH, FOR GOODNESS' SAKE.

[WHISTLE BLOWS] >> OH, FOR GOODNESS' SAKE.

YOU CAN'T JUST RUN FOR IT, EDDY.

A SUCCESSFUL ESCAPE DURING SCHOOL HOURS WILL TAKE CAREFUL

PLANNING WITH FLAWLESS EXECUTION.

PLANNING I WANT NO PART OF.

THANK YOU.

>> OH, YES, YOU DO, OR ED HERE IS GONNA WRITE YOUR LOCKER

COMBINATION ON THE GIRLS' BATHROOM WALL.

>> YOU WOULDN'T DARE.

[SNIFFING] >> WHO SENT YOU?

WHAT'D YOU HEAR?

>> IT WASN'T ME, EDDY.

HONEST.

IT'S PLANK.

HE WANTS TO ESCAPE, TOO!

>> NO WAY, JOSE.

>> PLANK SAYS HE'LL SQUEAL, EDDY!

>> WHY THAT DIRTY--LET ME AT HIM!

I'LL...I'LL...

OK, FINE.

BUT IF I HEAR ONE PEEP OUT OF EITHER OF YOU, YOU'RE GONZO.

>> I THINK I TINKLED, PLANK.

[WHISTLE BLOWS] >> [GRUNTING]

[WHISTLE BLOWS] >> [GRUNTING]

>> COUNT ME IN.

CURSE PHYSICAL EDUCATION.

WE'LL RENDEZVOUS AT LUNCH HOUR.

IT'S THE ONLY TIME WE CAN MOVE FREELY ABOUT THE SCHOOL.

SYNCHRONIZE YOUR WATCHES, GENTLEMEN.

>> WHAT WATCHES?

>> AN OMEN, I'M SURE.

[BELL RINGS] >> [WHISTLING]

[BELL RINGS] >> [WHISTLING]

[BELL RINGS] >> [WHISTLING]

[CAMERA CLICKING] [CLANGING]

[CAMERA CLICKING] [CLANGING]

[CAMERA CLICKING] [CLANGING]

[CAMERA CLICKING] [CLANGING]

>> HA HA HA!

>> MOVE IT, MOVE IT.

SO, HOW ARE WE BUSTING OUT OF THIS BOOBY HATCH, PROFESSOR?

>> PLANK SAYS IT'S A DRAGON, RIGHT?

>> A HAMBURGER BY ANY OTHER NAME WOULD BE AS CHEESY.

>> KEEP IT DOWN, NUMBSKULLS.

WE'RE TRYING TO BE SNEAKY HERE.

>> IS IT A HAMBURGER, EDDY?

>> HARDLY, ED.

I'VE CONSTRUCTED YOUR WINGED WISH, YOUR SOARING SKEDADDLE,

YOUR FLYING FLEE TO FREEDOM, GENTLEMEN.

>> WOW!

>> WHAT ARE WE LOOKING AT, GUYS?

>> OK, BREAK IT UP.

MOVE IT BEFORE THE SCREWS FIND OUT WE'RE MISSING.

OH, BOY, OH, BOY.

OH, BOY, OH, BOY.

>> UM, DOUBLE D.

I WAS KIND OF WONDERING IF YOU'D SIGN MY PETITION.

IT'S FOR, LIKE, CUTER GUYS FOR SCHOOL JANITORS.

WOULDN'T THAT BE COOL?

DOUBLE D.

ARE YOU OK, DUDE?

[SIREN] >> WE'VE BEEN MADE!

IT'S NOW OR NEVER, BOYS!

>> WAIT!

I'M NOT FINISHED!

I'M NOT FINISHED!

ABORT THE ESCAPE, EDDY.

THIS CRAFT IS NOT YET AIR WORTHY!

[PANTING] ABORT!

>> WE'RE FREE, BABY!

TO THE CUL-DE-SAC!

>> PINCH ME, PLANK!

WE'RE FUGITIVES!

[ENGINE SPUTTERING] >> DOUBLE D!

WHAT'S HAPPENING?

>> OH, DEAR.

WE'RE LOSING ALTITUDE, EDDY!

WE'RE CARRYING TOO MUCH WEIGHT.

>> WHAT?

>> NO OVERSIZED NOGGINS, JONNY.

AIRLINE POLICIES.

>> HEY, YOU!

>> IT'S WORKING!

DOUBLE D!

HA HA HA!

>> MY NAME IS ED!

FLY ME!

>> AAH!

[BELL RINGS] [ALL TALKING AT ONCE]

>> LET'S GO TO MY PLACE FOR AN AFTER-SCHOOL SNACK.

>> SOUNDS COOL, KEVIN.

>> ROLF WILL JOIN YOU.

>> 3's A CROWD, DUDE.

>> ARE WE FREE YET?

>> THIS IS YOUR FAULT, SOCKHEAD.

>> WHAT WAS I THINKING, EDDY?

OHH...

[MICROPHONE SQUEAKING] >> [HUMMING]

>> YOU HAVEN'T GOT A CHANCE THIS YEAR, DOUBLE D.

PLANK'S BEEN TRAINING.

HA HA HA!

>> W-O-T-H.

RESPUCK.

>> I CAN'T FEEL MY TOES ANYMORE, ROLF.

WE'VE BEEN PRACTICING FOR HOURS.

>> WHAT PRAYER DOES ROLF HAVE AGAINST THIS, THIS...

TOO SMART FOR HIS HEART ED BOY?

>> YES, WELL, GOOD LUCK, GENTLEMEN.

I'M SURE ALL WILL BE WELL.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO THAT POOR DEFENSELESS DICTIONARY?

>> WHAT'S IT LOOK LIKE?

ED'S CRAMMING FOR THE SPELLING BEE.

FEELING SMARTER, ED?

>> WHAT?

>> AS PROUD AS I AM THAT ED DECIDED TO PARTICIPATE, I FEAR

THE COMPETITION MAY BE A TAD OVER HIS, UM, HEAD?

>> AH, DON'T YOU WORRY YOUR LITTLE EGGHEAD ABOUT ED, 'CAUSE

YOU'LL BE GOING DOWN IN THE THIRD ROUND, RIGHT?

>> I BEG YOUR PARDON?

>> I MADE A BIG BET WITH KEV THAT MONOBROW IS GONNA WIN IN

THE THIRD.

SO STICK AROUND A ROUND OR TWO SO IT LOOKS GOOD.

THEN BAM!

TAKE A DIVE.

>> SURELY YOU JEST, EDDY.

HOW COULD YOU ASK ME TO DISENGAGE THE RULES OF LITERACY,

TO SQUANDER THE VALUES OF SCHOLASTIC TRADITION, TO SPIT

UPON THE VERY FOUNDATIONS OF WHAT OUR LANGUAGE IS BUILT ON?

>> SO YOU'RE SAYING YOU WON'T DO IT?

>> WHAT?

[APPLAUSE] >> GOOD EVENING.

[MICROPHONE SQUEAKING] LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, DUDES AND

BABES, WELCOME TO THE EIGHTH ANNUAL PEACH CREEK SPELLING BEE.

[APPLAUSE] LET'S BEGIN, SHALL WE?

DOUBLE D, YOUR WORD TO SPELL IS CERE...CERE-AB...

>> NAZZ, ARE YOU PRONOUNCING "CEREBRAL"?

>> YEAH, DUDE.

TOTALLY.

[APPLAUSE] >> CEREBRAL.

C-E-R-E-B-R-A-L.

CEREBRAL.

>> THAT'S CORRECT.

>> AAH!

I'M RUINED, TAPPED OUT, BUSTED!

>> UH...

PLANK?

OK.

YOUR WORD IS DECI...DECIDA...

DECIDI...

>> PARDON ME ONCE AGAIN.

DO YOU MEAN "DECIDUOUS"?

>> YEAH, THAT'S IT.

THANKS.

[BUZZER] OH, SORRY, DUDE.

YOU RAN OUT OF TIME.

>> WHAT ARE YOU, DEAF?

HE GOT IT RIGHT!

I'VE GOT MY EYE ON YOU.

WOOD-HATER.

>> BOY, THAT WAS CREEPY.

NEXT IS ROLF, AND YOUR WORD IS, UM, COL...ON...I...

>> COLONIAL?

>> RIGHT ON, DOUBLE D.

[APPLAUSE] [BREATHING HEAVILY]

>> ROLF'S MIND GOT BLANK.

[BREATHING HEAVILY] COLONIAL.

POPPYCOCK!

CURSE THIS MONKEY RITUAL OF ENGLISH WORDS!

[SPARSE APPLAUSE] THANK YOU, NANA!

>> UM, ED.

YOUR WORD TO SPELL IS EEK-TO-PLA-ASM?

>> [SIGH] ECTOPLASM?

>> I THINK SO.

>> OH, MAN.

>> GET READY TO COUGH UP, LOSER, 'CAUSE MY BOAT JUST CAME IN.

>> OH, OH!

I KNOW!

I SAW IT IN A MOVIE ONCE.

ECTOPLASM.

E-C-T-O-P-L-A-S-M.

ECTOPLASM.

[DING DING] >> CORRECT.

[APPLAUSE AND WHISTLING] AWESOME!

YOU TWO ARE, LIKE, TIED.

>> LOOKS LIKE THAT BOAT'S ON THE OTHER FOOT, HUH, KEV?

>> COME ON, DOUBLE DWEEB.

YOU PULL THROUGH, MAN.

>> OK, DOUBLE D.

YOUR FINAL WORD IS "GRAVY."

HEY, I GOT IT.

>> BETTER LUCK NEXT YEAR, ED.

[APPLAUSE] AHEM.

GRAVY.

G-R-A-V-I.

NO, Y!

"Y" IS WHAT I MEANT TO SAY.

>> OH, DUDE.

YOU KNOW THE RULES.

OVER TO YOU, ED.

CAN YOU SPELL GRAVY?

>> GRAVY.

G-R-A-V-Y.

GRAVY.

YUM.

[APPLAUSE] >> THIS YEAR'S WINNER OF THE

PEACH CREEK SPELLING BEE IS ED!

[CAMERAS CLICKING] >> SURE STINKS TO LOSE, HUH,

KEV?

>> YOU'D KNOW, DOOFUS.

MAN, HAVE YOU LOST IT.

I LOST A BUNDLE ON YOU, DOUBLE HAS-BEEN.

>> KEV, WAIT UP.

>> WOOD-HATER.

>> WOOD-HATER.

[OWL HOOTS] [BELL RINGS]

>> YOU SEE NOTHING, DOUBLE D.

>> ED, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

>> UH-OH.

>> THERE YOU ARE.

OK, SMARTY-PANTS.

JIMMY WANTS TO KNOW IF "X" IS "Y," HOW MUCH IS "P"?

>> SARAH ASKING ED FOR ACADEMIC ASSISTANCE?

>> 25 CENTS OR FLUNK, SQUIRTS.

>> OH, NEVER YOU MIND HIM.

I'LL BE GLAD TO ASSIST YOU BOTH FREE OF CHARGE.

>> YEAH, RIGHT, MR. I CAN'T EVEN SPELL GRAVY.

>> HEH HEH HEH HEH!

>> UH-HUH.

UH-HUH.

YES, WELL, TO "P" OR NOT TO "P".

THAT IS THE QUESTION.

>> THAT'S THE STUPIDEST THING I'VE HEARD.

>> SAYS YOU.

>> GIVE ME MY QUARTER BACK, YOU FATHEAD!

>> SARAH, SARAH, WAIT.

ED'S RIGHT.

>> IF YOU TAKE THE "P" OUT OF THE EQUATION, THE DIFFERENCE IS

THE ANSWER.

>> HE'S MINE!

I SAW HIM FIRST!

HA HA HA!

>> GO, BRAIN, GO, BRAIN, GO!

[BELL RINGS] >> MAN, AM I GLAD IT'S STUDY

PERIOD.

LIKE, I GOT SO MUCH HOMEWORK TO DO, IT AIN'T FUNNY 'CAUSE I'M,

LIKE, TOTALLY WORKING OUT.

>> YEAH.

I HEARD YOU THE FIRST 4 TIMES, KEVIN.

>> STEP RIGHT UP, FOLKS, AND BEHOLD--ED!

THAT'S ONE "D," NOT TWO.

THIS EGGHEAD EL GRANDE SHALL DOT YOUR T's AND CROSS YOUR I's AND

GET YOU A's AND THAT'S NO LIE.

JUST 25 CENTS PER QUESTION.

CHEAP.

>> EDDY, THIS IS HAPPENSTANCE AT BEST.

>> WHAT?

LIKE WE'RE SUPPOSED TO LISTEN TO YOU?

BURNOUT.

I'M IN.

I'VE GOT SOME HOMEWORK THAT NEEDS DOING.

>> HELLO.

ROLF REQUIRES ASSISTANCE, YES?

>> I COULD USE SOME HELP, TOO.

WELL, MAYBE A LOT.

>> OH, DEAR.

CERTAINLY THERE'S SOMETHING I CAN DO.

[TICKING] LOCKED?

HELLO?

ANYONE?

[GRUNTING] >> MAY I AID YOU?

AS I AM A GOOD SPELLER.

SEE?

P-U-L-L.

PULL.

>> EGGHEAD ED HELPED YOU.

COUGH UP A QUARTER.

>> [SIGH] I REMINISCE THOSE DAYS WHEN IT

WAS MY INTELLECT YOU EXPLOITED FOR YOUR OWN MONETARY GAIN,

EDDY.

ALAS, THEY'RE JUST BITTERSWEET MEMORIES NOW.

>> YEAH, YEAH.

JUST LET ME SEE THE CASH, HAMLET.

[CASH REGISTER RINGS] HA HA HA HA!

I'M RICH!

CANDY STORE, HERE I COME!

>> WAIT FOR EGGHEAD ED, EDDY!

>> HA HA HA!

WHAT?

>> WE FLUNKED OUT!

>> ALL F's.

>> WE GOT RIPPED OFF!

>> WE FAILED EVERYTHING.

>> WOE IS ME.

>> EGGHEAD ED'S A FAKE.

>> HE'S JUST PLAIN STUPID!

>> LOOK!

THERE HE IS!

>> RUN AWAY!

>> A LESSON MUST BE TAUGHT!

[SHOUTING] >> FENCE!

>> WE WANT OUR MONEY!

[SHOUTING] >> SURE STINKS TO LOSE, HUH,

DORKY?

>> HOLD IT!

I EARNED THAT FAIR AND SQUARE!

DOUBLE D, DO SOMETHING, WILL YOU?

>> WHY NOT ASK EGGHEAD ED?

>> BREADSTICKS HURT MY GUMS.

>> [CHUCKLING] >> WAIT UP, EVERYBODY!

LET'S SPLIT THE CASH, OK?

>> ED, I WANT YOU TO KNOW I'M VERY PROUD OF YOU AND YOUR

PERFORMANCE AT THE SPELLING BEE.

[GRUNTING] >> COOKIES AT MY HOUSE, DOUBLE

D, WITH LOTS OF MAYONNAISE.

>> THAT'S NOT REALLY NECESSARY, ED.

>> HELLO?

ANYBODY THERE?

>> GOT YOU THIS TIME.

WOOD-HATER.

>> JONNY.

YOU SCARED ME.

>> AW, WHO COULD STAY MAD AT YOU?

YOU WANT TO HOLD HANDS?

>> UGH!

IN YOUR DREAMS.

>> WHAT?

YOU HATE BALD KIDS, TOO?

>> ED, EDD N' EDDY!

>> BL-BL-BL-BL-BL YEAH!

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[CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE

--www.ncicap.org--]