Original subtitles

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP AND U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION

BRRRR...YEAH!

[GROWLING]

ED! PAY ATTENTION!

HERE I SEE THE NINTH HOLE,

WITH A JUMP OVER THE WATER

AND A SPIRAL TWIST TO THE HOLE.

NOW, WHERE TO PUT THE CART RENTALS...

DEVOUR STINKY SOCK!

[BABBLING]

GIVE ME THOSE SOCKS!

PLLLLT!

WHY, YOU!

GIVE ME MY SOCK! GIVE ME MY SOCK!

I THINK I'VE DONE IT!

Ed: I WANT MY SOCK!

DOUBLE-D! DOUGHNUT!

WHOA! UNH.

CAN I LICK THE BOWL, DOUBLE-D?

VOILA...

THE EDS' MINIATURE GOLF COURSE IS OPEN FOR BUSINESS!

COOL!

GOOD WORK, DOUBLE-D.

THE KIDS WILL LINE UP FOR BLOCKS,

AND WE'LL BE INDEPENDENTLY SECURE.

LET'S BREAK IT IN.

BUT, EDDY...

WAAAH!

AAAH!

HUH?

OH, NO!

MY TURN!

[GEARS GRIND TO A HALT]

FORE.

ALL MY HARD WORK...

WHAT PLANET ARE YOU FROM?

I COME IN PEACE, EDDY.

WELL... THE RODS ARE SHOT,

AND IT WILL PROBABLY TAKE ME WEEKS TO FIND ANOTHER BOX.

HUH? HOW COME DOUBLE-D

IS SO SMART ABOUT STUFF?

BECAUSE HE'S NOT HUMAN.

DOUBLE-D IS NOT HUMAN?!

NO WAY.

HEH HEH HEH.

I...THOUGHT YOU KNEW.

HAVE YOU EVER KNOWN ANYONE THAT SMART?

WELL?

HMM...

[GROWLS]

IF DOUBLE-D IS NOT HUMAN,

WHAT IS HE?

YOU DIDN'T HEAR THIS FROM ME, BUT...

DEEP IN THE EARTH'S CORE

IN A TOP-SECRET LAB,

A MAD SCIENTIST CONDUCTED CROSSBREEDING EXPERIMENTS...

DO TELL!

BY COMBINING A TERRIFYING LIZARD

WITH A SWEET BOY,

THUS CREATING... THE LIZARD MAN!

SEE THAT HAT?

HE HIDES HIS GILLS UNDER IT.

MUST TOUCH GILLS!

[LAUGHING]

RESPECT MY PERSONAL SPACE, PLEASE.

THANK YOU.

[LAUGHING]

[SNICKERING]

YOU'RE ON THIN ICE, MISTER!

HMM?

[GIGGLING]

MY COCOONS NEED TENDING.

WHAT DID I TELL YOU?

HURRY, EDDY!

QUIET! WE'RE NOT ALONE.

[LAUGHING]

NO, WE'RE NOT.

YES, WE ARE.

DOUBLE-D MADE SARAH AND JIMMY

FROM A PRAYING MANTIS AND A STINK BUG.

DOUBLE-D CHANGED ROLF, TOO.

HUH?

Eddy: LOOK AT HIM-- HE'S A PICNIC ANT.

I SMELL CHICKENS, EDDY.

ED, DON'T!

YOU ALMOST SQUASHED MORE OF DOUBLE-D's HANDIWORK.

I MUST FIND THE LIZARD MAN, EDDY!

AAAH!

Eddy: SEE? NOW HE'S MAKING

A COCKROACH KID.

HMM.

HMM!

HMM.

ED, IT'S IMPOLITE TO STARE.

HMM...

[SNIFFING]

HE IS NOT OF THIS EARTH, EDDY!

WHAT?

IS IT MY BREATH?

[SNIFFING]

[GASPS]

I SAW HIS TAIL!

HIS TAIL IS DANGEROUS!

BUT WATCH OUT FOR THE DEATH RAYS

HE SHOOTS FROM HIS EYES!

[CHOKING AND GAGGING]

PROTECT YOURSELF... WITH THIS!

HELLO. MY NAME IS ED.

BUT BE CAUTIOUS.

WHO KNOWS WHAT EVIL HE'S PLOTTING AS WE SPEAK?

Eddy: IT'S UNLOCKED!

WHAAH!

HI, GUYS.

DOES HE BITE?!

[EDDY MOANING EERILY]

HE'S ATTACKING, ED!

[GURGLING] HI, GUYS. HI.

WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING?

[GURGLING UNINTELLIGIBLY]

Eddy: ED, THE MIRROR! USE THE MIRROR!

ED...

AAH...

RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY!

WE'RE DOOMED, EDDY!

EDDY?

Eddy: ED, HELP! HE'S GOT ME!

NO! NOT EDDY!

TAKE ME, LIZARD MAN!

WHY ARE EDDY'S CLOTHES LYING ON MY FLOOR?

IS HE RUNNING AROUND NAKED AGAIN?

SURRENDER, LIZARD THING!

GIVE ME THE ANTIDOTE!

WHAT ANTIDOTE? HAVE YOU LOST YOUR--

AM I THE ONLY HUMAN LEFT?

I AM ALONE. I AM HUNGRY!

ED, WAIT. I CAN MAKE YOU A SANDWICH.

OOH! I'M A BUG! HELP ME, ED!

WHAT A SAP. HA HA HA HA!

RUN AWAY!

ED, PLEASE!

SOUP IS FILLING!

OW!

HI, ED. HI, DOUBLE-D.

I'M HAVING A BARBECUE THIS AFTERNOON.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO COME?

I'D BE DELIGHTED.

HOW ABOUT YOU, ED?

HMM?

LOTS OF FOOD.

YES, JOIN US, ED.

Both: JOIN US, ED.

JOIN US, ED.

JOIN US, ED.

OK, I GIVE UP!

IT'S NO FUN BEING THE LAST HUMAN.

SO CAN I BE A BUMBLEBEE?

EDDY, YOU'RE THE MAN WITH THE SCAM.

YOU'RE THE BIG-- UH, OH...

AAH! EEE! OHH!

Ed: SO IF I JOIN YOU AT THE PARTY,

COULD I BE A TARANTULA

OR MAYBE A SALAMANDER?

PARTY? WAIT!

HEY, I'M STUCK!

ED...

DON'T FORGET COCKROACH EDDY!

[BUZZING]

HUH?

WHO'S UP FOR A DOG?

YOUR PUNY WIENERS ARE NO MATCH FOR ROLF'S HUNGER.

HOW LONG'S THIS COOK FOR?

DONE.

YUMMY! HOT DOGS!

I LOVE FRANKS!

AH, WOE IS ME.

I CAN'T TAKE MY EYES OFF JIMMY EITHER, PLANK!

JONNY, HAVE YOU SEEN ED?

BUZZ, BUZZ, BUZZ.

OH, HELLO, ED.

I PICK THE MOSQUITO,

AS I AM READY TO BE TRANSFORMED

AND JOIN YOUR COLONY.

WHAT AN IDIOT.

BUZZ, BUZZ, BUZZ. BUZZ, BUZZ, BUZZ.

PSSST! ED! COME HERE, QUICK!

UNH...

EDDY!

YOU LOOK GOOD FOR A COCKROACH.

KNOCK IT OFF, FLEA-BRAIN,

AND GET THIS BUCKET OFF!

LET ME TAKE YOU TO YOUR PEOPLE!

WAIT!

HI, ED.

WOULD YOU LIKE A...BUG!

WHERE?! GET IT OFF!

CRUSH IT!

AAAAH!

DESSERT!

WHOA! AAH!

Kids: SQUASH THE BUG!

HUH?

WHAT DOES IT WANT?

IT TOOK REFUGE IN YOUR CELLAR.

IT WAS HUGE!

DO SOMETHING!

YES, GOOD... FOR AS PAPA WOULD SAY,

THE SHOE IS MIGHTIER THAN MAMA'S STUFFED PEPPERS.

BUT IT'S ONE OF YOU!

YOU.

QUICKLY, BEFORE IT LAYS EGGS!

STAY CLOSE, AS IT MAY TRY TO CRAWL UP YOUR PANTLEG.

I'M HAVING A PANIC ATTACK, SARAH!

IT'S OK, JIMMY.

YOU AND I CAN STAY HERE.

YES, AS YOU WISH.

WILL THERE BE ANY MORE CRYBABIES?

HMM...PLANK HAS A TUMMYACHE.

LET THE TRANSFORMATION BEGIN!

HA HA HA HA.

FOLLOW ROLF!

FOLLOW ROLF!

SMACK IT ONCE FOR ME!

STAY TOGETHER, FOR IT MAY TRY TO AMBUSH YOU

AND SUCK OUT YOUR MARROW!

Edd: UM, SHOULDN'T WE JUST FIND THE LIGHT SWITCH?

[SNIFFING]

DO YOU HEAR IT?

KEVIN, SHINE YOUR MOON BOX... THERE.

AAAAH!

IT'S SO GROSS!

THERE IT GOES!

IN HONOR OF MY ANCESTORS...

[SHRIEKING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

[GRUNTING]

ROLF'S PRETTY GOOD FOR A PICNIC ANT.

[GRUNTING]

YA-HOO!

MUCH BETTER.

HUH?

THIS IS NO BUG.

IS THAT...EDDY?

HIT HIM AGAIN.

DOUBLE-D TRANSFORMED EDDY INTO A COCKROACH.

I HONESTLY HAVEN'T A CLUE.

YOU GOT THAT RIGHT.

HMM!

CAN YOU PLEASE HELP ME OUT HERE?

FORGET ABOUT IT!

JUST GET ME OUT OF THIS BUCKET!

ARE THEY FROM THIS PLANET?

NOPE. THEY'RE FROM THE LAND OF THE DORKS.

COULD SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON?

WELL?

Ed: BASEMENT.

Eddy: FOOT!

OOH!

Edd: CAREFUL...

Ed: MY TURN!

SLOWLY...

MY TURN!

CAREFUL...

MY TURN, MY TURN!

READY?

ED, YOUR TOYS ARE MARVELOUS!

AND DRAFTY.

AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO WORKS AROUND HERE?

AAAH!

Ed: COME TO YOUR MASTER!

HA HA HA HA!

LISTEN TO THE MECHANICS OF THE GEARS

WINDING AND WHIRRING!

YEAH, LIKE MY STOMACH.

HELLO, STUPID WINDUP TOY.

[SHRIEKING]

[LAUGHING]

DO YOU SMELL BUTTERED TOAST?

ED!

YOUR STUPID TOY ATE MY BREAKFAST!

AAH! UNH...

STAY BACK! BACK!

DO NOT MESS WITH YOUR MASTER!

OBEY ME!

[LAUGHING]

HUH?

WHOA!

OHH...

[GRUNTING]

GO GET IT, DR. BROWNSTEIN!

DID ED ACTUALLY CRAWL UNDERNEATH HIS BED?

[ED GROANING]

GOT IT!

[SEAGULLS CRYING]

ED! HOW CAN YOU LIVE THIS WAY?!

I CAN'T BREATHE! I MUST HAVE FRESH AIR!

AAH! AAAAH!

Ed: AAAAH!

DON'T GO!

PENELOPE! EDMUND!

NESTOR!

I HATE BIRDS. THEY'RE SO USELESS.

AAAAH!

COME BACK!

KIDS!

YOU'RE A WIMP, ED.

[ALL CHEERING]

CHECK THIS OUT.

[CHEERING]

GO, KEVIN, GO!

AWESOME!

AWESOME, I DON'T KNOW, BUT VERY GOOD, YEAH?

HE'S SO CONFIDENT, SO SERENE...

KEVIN? BIG DEAL!

WHAT'S WITH THIS STUFF, ANYWAY?

KEVIN IS BREAKING A WORLD RECORD.

WORLD RECORD? HE'S A HACK!

TRUE RECORDS ARE SET BY PROFESSIONALS...

LIKE ED, EDD...

AAH! OW!

AND EDDY.

I SUPPRESS MY PAIN OF LAUGHTER.

DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, ROLF.

EDDY JUST TALKS IN DORKINESE.

YAY!

OH, BOY!

IT'S BEAUTIFUL!

OH, WAY BIG!

Kevin: GIVE IT TO ME, JONNY.

GOLLY...THAT'S SOME SKID MARK, HUH, PLANK?

IT MUST BE AT LEAST 32 FEET IN LENGTH.

Jonny: 32 FEET!

A NEW RECORD!

COOL.

WHAT? NOW YOU'RE SOME KIND OF PSYCHIC YARDSTICK?

LET ME CONGRATULATE YOU WITH A VICTORY ARMPIT RUB.

[LAUGHING]

SO WHAT?

WE COULD BEAT THAT.

IF ONLY WE HAD A SACK OF POTATOES.

POTATOES WOULDN'T AID US IN ANY WAY, ED.

SPARE ME, TWERPS. WHY DON'T YOU SHOW US WHAT YOU GOT?

NO PROBLEM!

WE'RE PROS! JUST WATCH US.

THERE HE GOES, INVOLVING YOU AND I

WITH HIS USE OF PLURAL PRONOUNS.

THIS ONE'S FOR YOU, NESTOR!

IS EVERYONE WATCHING?

WELL, DUH, EDDY.

THIS CONTRAPTION ONLY TAKES UP HALF OF THE CUL-DE-SAC.

WORLD RECORD, HERE WE COME!

PLURAL PRONOUN!

OH, DEAR!

GIDDYUP!

[ALL SCREAMING]

[GROANING]

OH, YOU GUYS ARE GOOD.

[LAUGHING]

REAL PROS.

HOW CAN I COMPETE?

MY FEET SWELL WITH JOY.

COME ON, JIMMY.

EDDY, MAY I SUGGEST SOMETHING LESS PHYSICAL...

LIKE KNITTING?

KNITTING?!

I CAN SEE IT ALL NOW...

WE KNIT A BIG BLANKET, A HUGE BLANKET!

KEVIN WOULD HAVE TO OUTKNIT US!

THAT... THAT HE WOULD.

I LIKE BLANKETS WITH LITTLE FRINGES ON THEM--

NOT KNITTING!

WE MOVE TO PLAN "B."

KNITTING. PLEASE!

UNH!

YEAH, YEAH!

56 BELLY SLAMS IN A ROW!

AND NOT A BEAD OF SWEAT!

YOU ARE GOOD, BUT I MUST TEMPT YOU

WITH ROLF'S RECORD FOR UNICYCLE SHENANIGANS.

RIGHT, BUT DON'T COUNT YOUR CHICKENS.

WHY WOULD I NOT COUNT MY CHICKENS?

CHIN-UPS ARE AN EASY RECORD, JIMMY.

HALF-PINTS OVER EASY!

HA HA HA HA!

NOW SPIN THEM AROUND LIKE A SICK GOAT.

ROLF, YOU SURE ARE OLD-WORLD.

HA HA HA!

SOME RECORD, KEV. WHAT'S NEXT?

PILLOW FLUFFING?

YAWN!

WHAT ARE YOU DORKING ABOUT NOW?

THE RECORD JUST MOI

AND MY TWO ENGINEERS--

THE FASTEST TRIP AROUND THE WORLD WITH A ROCKET CAR

THAT WENT SO FAST, THE PAINT PEELED OFF.

YEAH, RIGHT.

YOU DON'T HAVE A ROCKET CAR.

OH? THEN HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN THIS BAGUETTE?

I PICKED IT UP ON A FUEL STOP IN FRANCE.

AND I GOT THIS CHINESE FOOD IN CHINA LAND.

RECORD-BREAKING ROCKET CAR. UNH!

ALL RIGHT, MOO GOO GAI DORK.

LET'S SEE YOUR ROCKET CAR.

DOES IT HAVE SHINY FINS?

HOW FAST DOES IT GO, ROCKET MAN?

DOES IT HAVE KNOBS?

COME SEE FOR YOURSELF...

JUST DOWN THE LANE.

OH, BOY!

SHOW US, EDDY!

RIGHT. LET'S GO.

TO THE ROCKET CAR!

EXCELLENT IDEA.

WHOA!

AFTER YOU.

PLEASE LEAD THE WAY.

RIGHT THIS WAY.

YOU FIRST.

Eddy: WATCH YOUR STEP!

Kevin: FOLLOW THE YELLOW BRICK ROAD.

VOULEZ-VOUS, AND I DO MEAN YOU.

Edd: ALL DONE.

OH, THAT'S SO COOL, DOUBLE-D.

THANK YOU, ED.

CAN WE VISIT THE PLANET OF BACON MEN

AND HAVE THE MARROW SUCKED FROM OUR BONES?

IT'S JUST A PROP, ED.

IT'S TOO SMALL.

SMALL?! PLEASE, ED.

COMPACT.

I INSIST.

LADIES FIRST.

[GROANS]

THIS IS A ROCKET CAR?

YEAH, RIGHT.

IS THAT A TRAFFIC CONE?

UH, YEAH...

READY FOR LAUNCH!

[ALL YELLING]

OH, DEAR! IT TOO SMALL!

ROOM FOR ONE MORE!

MY HEAD...

TOUCH ME WITH THAT BROOM,

AND I'LL TEAR OFF YOUR EYEBROW.

READY, DOUBLE-D?

THE SUCCESS OF THIS IS SLIM TO--

OK, PREPARE TO BLAST OFF!

WATCH THE HEAD, BIG GUY.

WHERE?

WHERE'S THE OTHER DWEEBS?

YOU WANT TO BE CRAMPED UP WITH ED'S PITS?

[ALL TALKING AT ONCE]

PREPARE FOR BLASTOFF!

IGNITING TURBINE THRUSTERS.

SHAVING SPARK PLUGS. CONTACT!

AH, BABY!

WE'RE MOVING, SARAH.

DON'T BLINK. WE'RE ALREADY PASSING THROUGH SCOTLAND.

LOOK, LOOK! A MAN WEARING A DRESS!

Rolf: HA HA!

NOW WE'RE WHIZZING PAST SWITZERLAND.

I SMELL A GOAT!

YES, LOOK!

A FINE MATE FOR VICTOR, YES?

GET OVER IT, ROLF.

[KIDS YELLING]

LOOK--MEXICO. LET'S TAN.

I'M HOMESICK.

[PANTING]

HMM?

EXCUSE ME, PILOT...

PLANK'S FEELING A LITTLE WOOZY.

NORMAL BEHAVIOR...

'CAUSE WE'RE OVER THE SPECIFIC OCEAN.

[ROARING]

Jimmy: JIMINY! A SHARK!

[ALL YELLING]

[ROARING]

DO NOT FEAR.

[TOILET FLUSHES]

HYPERSPEED! HA HA HA HA!

WHOO-HOO!

THERE GOES EGYPT.

AFRICA...

AFGHANISTAN...

POP GOES THE EDDY.

HEH HEH. HI, KEV.

[WHISTLING]

KEVIN, UH... WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

KEVIN? PLEASE!

KEVIN!

CAN'T YOU TAKE A JOKE?

[YELLING]

OH, DEAR!

[ALL LAUGHING]

[ALL YELLING]

[MOANING AND GROANING]

Edd: NOT GOOD!

WHOA...WHOA!

[ALL SCREAMING]

Ed: WHOA-HO-HO! ALLEY-OOP!

[SCREAMING]

[COUGHING]

I THINK I SWALLOWED A TURTLE.

OH...WHAT COUNTRY ARE WE IN?

WE'RE HOME, EDDY...

AND WE'VE BROKEN EVERYTHING BUT A RECORD.

CAN I WEAR A DRESS AGAIN?

[LAUGHING]

ED, EDD N EDDY!

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP AND U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION

CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE --www.ncicap.org--